#azumabito

[melishade]

I also want to applaud you for doing something with Mikasa. In the canon she legit has no character so it is always good to see writers going "fine, I'll do it myself."

Yeah, Mikasa’s character development in the show has been attached to Eren in some way shape or form. The only time a major character development that happened that was outside of Eren was Armin, and that involved letting him die and Erwin becoming a titan in the Ackerbowl.

Isayama introducing the Azumabito’s and then saying Mikasa is a goddamn princess had little to no weight for the story. He didn’t do anything with that. You made Mikasa a bad ass warrior and princess and you do nothing with that?! Are you kidding me?! Removing that bit of information in the story probably wouldn’t have changed little to nothing. We don’t even get to see the damn nation in the manga and anime.

Mikasa getting in touch with her roots would have been phenomenal character work for her. She finds out more about herself, she realizes she’s not an anomaly in the Walls, and she’s growing outside of Eren’s shadow. That’s why I wrote the Hizuru chapter in the first place: to give Mikasa some goddamn character focus.

[levmada]

i wonder if levi knew zeke killed mike too💀

[thena0315]

In an AU, these people were all in the same room together

Important Military Personnel & World Leaders + Ambassadors & Figures

[corner-stories]

when it's dark in a cold decembre (but i've got you to keep me warm)

Jean Kirschtein. Mikasa Ackerman. Kiyomi Azumabito. Holiday Visits. Awkward Family Dinners. Cuddles. Doggies. 4191 words. (ao3.)

Vancouver is a change of pace. Having grown so used to winters in Montreal — or even his hometown of Trois-Rivieres — arriving at YVR to rain instead of snow leaves him confused. 

At least Mikasa seems to find amusement in the poor Quebecer getting soaked in the drizzle. 

A rapid transit line takes them from the airport to downtown, then an Uber driver takes them the rest of the way. As the vehicle crosses the Lionsgate Bridge, Jean’s eyes are affixed to the window and towards the rainy city outside.

At this time of night, all he can see is artificial lights — buildings with glass exteriors standing amidst the ocean and coniferous trees. It’s just enough to let him see the outline of the mountains. Above it all are clouds in a dark sky. 

The car drives deeper into West Vancouver. The houses lining the roads are built with an emphasis on style and aesthetic, most of them looking to have been designed very recently with walls made of stone and glass. 

Mikasa had told him that her Auntie was wealthy, and as the car passes by a house with more driveways and outdoor entertaining space to do with, the sentiment rings true. 

Soon enough, the car arrives at the destination. 

The house Mikasa grew up in differs from the gray homes adorning the streets. When Jean sees it, his eyes go to the vinyl siding and the rugged roof tiles, attributes that make the craftsman home feel like an island in the ocean of stone and glass houses. 

Jean hoists his bags over his shoulder as the Uber driver takes off down the street. Mikasa walks from the street to the curb, comfortably taking her boyfriend’s hand as he looks at the house. 

“You like?” 

Jean nods, unable to take his eyes off the bulbs adorning the eaves. “I like the lights.” 

“Auntie likes them, too.” She then squeezes his hand and begins guiding him towards the house. 

Jean follows, keeping his eyes on the ground and watching her boots step into the puddles on the pathway. The rain is lighter here than it is at the airport, but it’s still enough for water droplets to collect in his hair. 

The two climb up the steps and Jean mentally goes over the backstory Mikasa had given him regarding her aunt. Kiyomi had grown up alongside Mikasa’s mother in Tokyo, and despite being cousins they acted a lot more like sisters. They even moved to Vancouver together to study. They had kept in touch even when Makoto married a local man while Kiyomi moved back to Japan.

It was no surprise that Kiyomi was the one who stepped up after Mikasa’s parents passed, gladly taking the nine-year-old in and giving her shelter in a time where she had none. She even decided to move back to Canada permanently to be near her niece. 

Despite coming from wealth, Kiyomi kept herself busy as a tenured professor at a local university. Giving lectures on international relations seemed to be her second priority on top of providing for Mikasa. Academia appeared to run in the Azumabito-Ackerman household. 

As Jean keeps reciting the lore in his head, he turns to Mikasa and asks a last-minute question.

“So… is there anything else I should know?” His voice is just slightly tinged with his signature wit. “You know, before the point of no return?” 

“Just be yourself,” Mikasa insists as her boots touch the top of the porch. “Besides, you both like sassing me and old school Celine Dion, in her mind you can do no wrong.” 

Jean makes a noise that’s in between an awkward laugh and a nervous chuckle. “That’s one way to look at things…” 

When the doorbell rings, what immediately follows is the sound of several dogs barking their heads off — one even sounds like a howl. Through the pane of glass in the door Jean can see two fluffy creatures with legs rushing to the door. After they yelp at the door for a few seconds, a person descends the stairs and gestures for said creatures to quiet down. 

Unsurprisingly, the act of wagging one’s finger at two rambunctious dogs does nothing to quell their screams. 

Nonetheless, the door opens and the pair of tired traveling grad students are greeted to the sight of Mikasa’s Aunt Kiyomi.

As to be expected, the older lady is smiling from ear to ear and immediately steps forward to embrace her niece. Mikasa herself gives a gentle grin as she hugs her Aunt back. 

“Mikasa!”

“Auntie.”

Jean gives them their space as they reunite. In the space between the doorframe and the door, he gets a better look into the house, taking note of the wooden floors, the warm lighting, the spotless walls. The whole place is impeccably clean, even with the two dogs running around.

Speaking of which, Jean also gets an eyeful of the canines standing behind Kiyomi — one is a samoyed with the doofiest grin he’s ever seen on a dog, and the other is husky with an abundance of fluffy fur. The husky in particular is letting out dramatic weeping noises as it looks at the visitors at the door. 

When aunt and niece separate, Kiyomi sets her eyes on Jean. 

“And is this the boyfriend I’ve heard so much about?” she asks. “Jean, right?”

Jean gives a nod and a polite smile. “That’s me.” He reaches out and shakes her hand. “Nice to meet you, Miss Azumabito.”

Kiyomi is a head shorter than both Jean and Mikasa. Like her niece, her hair is dark, but she keeps it neatly combed and tied into a proper bun. 

The only woman looks him up and down, seemingly content with finally meeting him in the flesh. She even seems flattered by his formality. “Please, call me Kiyomi. And come in, you two must be soaked.”

Jean and Mikasa enter the home, bringing their luggage with them. He’s only been in Vancouver for an hour and he’s already relieved to get out of the downpour. 

As Jean shakes the water out of his hair, Mikasa kneels down to the two dogs of the Azumabito household. She beams sweetly at both the husky and the samoyed, both of which are excited to see her return. The husky in particular is wagging its tail so hard that its rear end is shaking. 

Back at McGill, Mikasa had spoken at length about her dogs back at home. Back at their apartment, there’s a photo of both the husky and samoyed as puppies pinned to their refrigerator.

Seeing the dogs in the fluff is significantly more enjoyable than seeing them in photo form. The sweet look of heartfelt joy on Mikasa’s face is also a bonus. 

“Yes, yes, I missed you, too,” says Mikasa as the husky kisses her cheek. 

Kiyomi immediately proves to be a cordial host. She takes Jean’s jacket without being prompted, hanging it up on a nearby coat rack. She then reaches for the luggage and grabs the first two bags she can find. 

“It’s been raining all week,” the older lady says. She takes a pair of backpacks to a nearby closet. 

“Has it?” asks Mikasa. 

There is an irked, gravelly tone to Kiyomi’s voice as she replies. “Unfortunately.” 

Mikasa lets out a hum, which is her way of laughing. “That’s a Vancouver Christmas for you.” 

Jean chuckles as he rubs his freezing hands together. Now free from the constraints of his parka, he kneels down to get to Mikasa’s level and looks at the pair of dogs. 

“Hey, I’ve heard a lot about you two,” he says, petting the head of the cheery samoyed. “So… which one’s which again?”

Mikasa gestures to the husky lovingly licking her cheek. “This one’s Mochi…” She then points to the white fluff ball. “...and this one’s Miso.” 

Jean can’t help but chuckle, a throaty one that makes the corners of his mouth turn up. 

Somehow, he’s getting the feeling that he’ll enjoy the holidays here. 

…

…

…

Dinner is a simple affair, though Kiyomi uses it as an excuse to break out a bottle of red from the cellar. Christmas may be a few days away, but her beloved niece returning home is a good reason to celebrate. She serves dishes that Mikasa has had throughout her childhood, only occasionally having to scold the dogs for putting their paws on the table. Evidently, Mochi absolutely drools in the presence of Kiyomi’s katsudon. 

And true to Mikasa’s words, Kiyomi is a fan of old-school Dion, as the singer’s Christmas album proceeds to play on the house stereo. 

Jean sits at the table and listens to aunt and niece catching up, taking note of the way Mikasa’s eyes light up as she speaks. Sometimes they’ll slip into Japanese in the middle of the conversation, only exchanging a few brief sentences before returning to English. It happens so smoothly that Jean can tell it’s just one of those habits the two share. 

And suddenly, he now knows how Mikasa feels when he switches into French with other francophones in front of her. 

A part of him is hesitant to chime in, as the flow of the conversation feels so fast. He’s also worried that he might spoil the joy of the reunion. 

So he spends the time petting Miso under the table while Mochi tries to steal some bites of okonomiyaki. At least the samoyed has begun taking a liking to him. 

Mikasa recalls to her Aunt Kiyomi exactly how she and Jean met. The story involved a social gathering for McGill grad students, as well as alcohol and a karaoke machine. Sometimes Jean thinks about how different things would have been had Mikasa not spilled wine on his shirt at the start of the party — he would have probably spent the night drunk singing instead of watching her trying to fruitlessly clean his clothes in the bathroom. 

Considering how many of his colleagues at the School of Architecture were attending the party, Mikasa had most likely saved his reputation before he even had one to destroy. 

Mikasa is in the midst of explaining her thesis to Kiyomi, detailing how she made the choice to specialize in plant pathology. Recently, she’s been studying a virus that has only been affecting flowers that thrive in cold weather. 

Jean loves it when she gets like this, so wrapped up in explaining her work that she’s talking more than she usually does. Truth be told, he can’t comprehend enough botanical science to truly understand what she’s talking about, but the fact that she can talk about trees and flowers like an artist talks about the Sistine Chapel is enough for him. Seeing the way she lights up as she talks about what she’s dedicating her life to is all he’ll ever need. 

Plus, Mikasa always seems tuned in when he goes on and on about architecture mumbo jumbo, even the stuff that he knows for a fact will bore people to tears. (“No one cares about the history of the pillar,” Sasha’s voice echoes in his head.) The least he can do is be an attentive boyfriend. 

“It’s nice to know that all those years away from home have done you good,” Kiyomi says, pouring herself a little more wine. 

“It has,” Mikasa assures. She then looks down and sees Mochi resting his chin on her lap with a loving look in his eyes.“But I can never stay away for too long…” 

Kiyomi looks amused. “Have you ever considered getting a dog?” 

“We have,” Jean finally speaks up. It’s telling of him that the one topic he’s more comfortable chining in on is pets. “But it’d be a hassle while we’re both still in school.”

Nonetheless, Kiyomi looks interested and listens intently. 

“We did dogsit for our friend Historia once — she’s got a terrier mix, we watched it for about a week,” Jean continues, then lets out a chuckle. “The poor guy would weep every time we crated him for the night, wouldn’t sleep unless he was in the bed with us.” 

Mikasa lets out a polite hum, reliving the memories of the two stressed grad students trying to curb a terrier’s energy inside their apartment. At least the little one was calm once he was allowed to sleep in the realm of the humans. 

“And our bedroom still has some of Donut’s dog hair in it,” Mikasa adds. 

Kiyomi spends a moment politely laughing along.

“Oh, speaking of which,” the older lady starts, eyeing the man currently petting the samoyed under the table. “Jean, I prepared the guest bedroom for you.” 

It does not take long for both Jean and Mikasa to understand the implications. Jean is suddenly plunged into a mix of embarrassment and confusion, a sensation that makes him pick up the fidgety mannerisms of a twelve-year-old boy. 

“Ah… thank you?” is all he can muster. Awkwardly, he scratches the back of his neck. 

Meanwhile, Mikasa’s sweet smile disappears from her pretty face and in its place is a glare directed at the hostess. 

“Auntie, I was under the impression that my room would be available for us,” she asks in a tone that’s the slightest bit stilted, perhaps to cover up her clear agitation. 

“Oh, certainly, Dear, it’s available for you,” Kiyomi explains simply. The way she says ‘dear’ is both motherly and condescending. “I’ve cleaned it and everything.” 

Mikasa starts to look more and more frustrated with every passing second. “I meant for both of us.” 

“Not in my house.” Kiyomi then reaches for the bottle in the middle of the table like nothing is wrong. “More wine, anyone?” 

Then just like before, Mikasa and Kiyomi slip into a tongue that’s foreign to Jean's ears. This time, instead of speaking Japanese for a sentence or two, the two engage into what can respectfully be referred to as a “passive aggressive debate.” 

Jean hasn’t learned enough Japanese to discern exactly what the two are saying, but the subject matter is enough to bring a blush to his cheeks. He didn’t anticipate that the concept of he and Mikasa sharing a room — despite sharing so much more back in their apartment in Montreal — would be such a hot topic in the Azumabito household. Apparently, Kiyomi had put a lot of thought into making sure that her niece and her niece’s boyfriend didn’t get too close.

Mikasa’s tone is composed, focused, the one she uses when she has to babysit freshmen undergrads all day. Yet it is laced with just enough persistence to prove that she’s not backing down without a fight. On the other hand, Kiyomi remains placid as she explains her point, continuing to act like there’s nothing wrong with her silly little rule. 

Suddenly, Jean’s wondering why he passed up on his mother’s offer to spend the holidays with her in Montpellier. 

To quell the uncomfortable knot forming in his stomach, Jean begins petting another dog — Mochi this time — and reaches for the bottle of red. 

“Some wine sounds nice, actually.”

…

…

…

Once dinner and the debate is over, the two jet-lagged grad students decide to retire for the night. It’s only 9 o’clock but it feels so much later than that. 

The outcome of the conversation has caused Jean to unpack his luggage in the basement guest room, whereas Mikasa is forced to do the same on the top floor. 

The last time Mikasa had stayed in her childhood bedroom, she was taking a break before heading onto grad school. She can remember the months she spent preparing to move across the country for a second time — the tables she waited to earn extra cash, the lessons she spent with a tutor to get a better grasp on French. Montreal was going to be a whole new beast compared to Toronto — where she had completed her undergrad — and every reminder of that was a sign that she needed to prepare. 

That era of her life was roughly two years ago, yet Mikasa feels like it’s a millenia away. 

Despite Kiyomi’s rule regarding her niece and her niece’s significant other, at least the bedroom is clean and cozy. Although the pictures and art on the wall have been removed, the sheets are clean and the blankets are soft, more than enough to help Mikasa survive the night. 

So alone in her room, Mikasa lies on a bed and reads a book, her usual habit whenever she needs to fall asleep. With the sound of rain hitting the roof and the two dogs napping at the foot of her bed, she almost feels like she’s in high school again, preferring to spend hours in her room just snuggling with Mochi and Miso. 

As Mikasa turns the page, she hears a light knock. Mochi immediately lifts his head from the cushions and watches the door open. Jean peaks in with a playful, almost boyish look on his face, knowing well that what he’s doing is a little mischievous. 

He steps into the room calmly, having changed from his traveling clothes to something a lot more comfortable. He’s wearing a pair of pyjama pants that Mikasa bought for him on a whim, as well as a flannel shirt that he’s buttoned sparingly. His hair is damp from a shower, ashy brown locks draping messily over his face. The stubble on his jawline and chin looks a bit thicker, more like a short beard. 

Knowing Jean, Mikasa wonders if he’s trying to entice her, as he knows exactly what she thinks when she sees him looking so disheveled. 

“What are you reading?” he asks, stepping barefoot into her room. He sits on the edge of her bed and starts petting Miso, who predictably reacts with a doofy grin. 

Mikasa looks away from her book. “One of Sasha’s romance novels — she lent it to me.”

Jean catches sight of the muscular man on the cover and raises an eyebrow. “Sasha reads romance?” 

“When she can,” Mikasa answers. “Vet school’s been taking up a lot of her time.” 

There is a beat — Mikasa continues reading and Jean continues petting the dog on the bed. He then notices something that brings a smile to his face. 

“You’re wearing my shirt.” 

Mikasa is nonplussed as she turns a page. “I know.”

Nowadays, Jean’s green button-front shirt finds itself in Mikasa’s care more often than his. He doesn’t seem to mind though. 

Mikasa changes the subject with ease. She looks up and affixes her gaze to his. “How’s the guest room? Cozy?”

“It is.” He nods his head, then his voice goes warm. “Not as cozy as this though.” 

Mikasa is quick to close her book and give him a knowing look. “Don’t get any ideas. I wouldn’t want Kiyomi to toss you onto the street.” 

Jean puts his hands up in mock defeat. “Trust me, I wouldn’t want that either.” 

Putting her novel away, she straightens her back and sits up. “I’m sorry you had to see the argument.” 

“It’s fine,” Jean shrugs. At least he’s good at taking things in stride. “What’s the holidays without some family bickering, huh?”

Mikasa lets out a sigh and looks down. “Unfortunately.” 

In hindsight, attempting to argue with Kiyomi in Japanese was somewhat pointless, as Jean most likely knew that they were talking about thanks to their mannerisms. Some things in the world are just made to transcend language barriers.

“But hey, I don’t wanna rock the boat.” He’s trying to keep a positive undertone to his voice. “I just wanted to say goodnight.” 

He moves on the bed a bit to sit next to her, gently cupping her face with his hand and pressing a kiss to her forehead. Mikasa closes her eyes and lets the gesture send a warm sensation throughout her entire body. The unease she had dealt with at dinner starts to fade away. 

With his palms still touching her cheeks, Jean presses a kiss to her lips. It’s gentle, sweet, and makes her want him to stay.

She puts her hands on his as they remain on her face, gently deepening their kiss as her forehead brushes against his. He’s warm, so warm.

Mikasa’s hands trail down to Jean’s shoulders, then to his chest — her thumbs start hooking into the hems of his shirt. 

But before anything more can happen, Jean pulls away. She can see the flustered look on his face as his breathing goes unsteady.

“I should go,” he insists, quickly buttoning up his shirt. 

Sensing the urgency Mikasa nods along. She then remembers that Kiyomi is still awake and currently relaxing one floor beneath them. 

Also, if they are to engage in any intimacy during the stay, she would rather do it without the dogs in the room.

Jean takes her hand and kisses it, a last gesture before he leaves. 

“See you in the morning, mon amour.” 

And when everything said is done, he leaves. Standing from the bed, he gives the dogs some last pets before walking out of the bedroom. He makes sure to give Mikasa one last assuring look before he is truly gone. 

Once the door is closed, Mikasa takes in a breath and rubs her face. Her palms are sweating. When she opens her eyes she is greeted to the sight of Mochi and Miso staring at her with their unblinking gazes. 

Her first instinct is to glare back. “Don’t judge me, I’ve seen you two dig up a hornet’s nest.” 

…

…

…

It’s 5AM when Mikasa wakes. The room is warm and so is the bed, yet when she reaches to the other side to only feel nothing it might as well be cold as ice. 

After opening her eyes, she spends a few moments staring at the ceiling and thinking about how tired she is. She may be on vacation, but parts of her are still in grad student mode. Her body has yet to comprehend that she’s not going to spend the day TAing or going over research notes.  

When Mikasa gets up, she notices that the dogs are no longer sleeping at the foot of her bed. With the bedroom door ajar, she surmises that Mochi and Miso have transitioned to sleeping in Kiyomi’s bed, as per usual. 

Being jet-lagged, Mikasa feels awake, but the kind of awake where one can either function for the day or go for a few more hours of slumber. She contemplates going for an early morning run to ease her nerves, then looks to the window to find that last night’s downpour has intensified. 

Vancouver is always rainy, but the kind of rain that makes it impossible to go outside feels truly constricting. 

Then an idea pops into Mikasa’s head, one attached to consequences but possible enough to pull off. She has to be careful though, so as quietly as she can she slips out of bed and steps onto the floor. 

The carpets dampen the noise of her footfalls as she makes her way through the hallway. When she sees Kiyomi’s bedroom door slightly ajar, she takes in the sight of her Auntie sleeping in between the world’s fluffiest dogs. Smartly, she makes sure to close the door. 

Mikasa descends the stairs to the first floor, moving past the furniture and framed photographs before approaching the basement entrance. The lower portion of the house is as cozy as the rest and when she arrives at the bedroom at the end of the hall she slips in without any hesitation. She makes sure to lock the door behind her. 

The guest room is warm, Jean’s belongings are scattered about. On a nearby chair is the shirt he had been wearing in her room and on the desk is one of his sketchbooks — he’s quite fond of traveling with at least one. The open page is filled with doodles of Mochi and Miso.

Jean is fast asleep on the bed, bare-chested and breathing gently. His eyes are closed and his hair is strewn in every direction. 

Mikasa doesn’t waste any more time. She slips under the sheets, her body easily finding his, and begins peppering kisses against his shoulder. 

With the sweetest touch, she trails her lips up his neck and onto his jaw. His stubble is soft and tickles her face. He lets out a hum, as he’s used to being woken up like this. His eyes are still closed as he shifts slightly, letting Mikasa easily pry herself under his arm. Soon she rests her head on his chest, where she always likes to be. He’s warm, warmer than her room upstairs. 

With all his strength, Jean manages to open his eyes just enough to see his girlfriend snuggling against him. The room is dark, but she can still see the sleepy smile on his beautiful face. 

“Couldn’t stay away?” 

“Not a bit.” 

Mikasa relaxes into him, letting his heartbeat become a gentle lullaby. In the sheets his hand finds hers and holds it tight, one of her legs hooking around his. She is content to drift off to sleep just like this.  

She’ll deal with the consequences later. 

[warm-starlight]

Some funny official illustrations counting down time until SnK episode release.

[binibchielq]

Lady Kiyomi Azumabito, Finding Yourself Again.

A new fic.

I have loved Kiyomi's character so much ever since I first saw her. It makes me sad that we never get to know more of her or what had become of her post-war. But, I'm grateful that she is such an open-canvas of ideas for me to write this.

I know there is no Rivamika at the moment, but I rest assure you, they will be important later on...

Enjoy Mikasa and Kiyomi's connection for the meantime. Enjoy. ♡

[helenbagheera]

Chapter 19. The End Of Sufferings

New part is already here!

"Armin," taking a few steps towards Levi, Smith froze in place and turned around. "How does this happen?"

"You will be guided only by your instincts. After waking up, you won't remember anything, so you'll need at least some rest. We can't say exactly what kind of animal it will be, because it depends on the psychological qualities of the bearer. Maybe a horse, maybe a cat, maybe something else."

"He's as much a horse as I am a prostitute,” Nile teased his friend loudly. "You'll be a sheep with bushy eyebrows."

"I say it'll be a cat!" Hanji immediately argued with Nile's conclusion.

"I never thought I'd be able to watch a man gain the power of a titan,” said Pixis, who, by the look on his face, was getting ready to see a real show.

[sailorspica]

what I think is cool about hizuru is 1) it's such an unflattering portrait and so the greatest evidence aot is Not a work of japanese nationalism, but also 2) mikasa's relationship to her own identity is pretty nuanced

i don't have a lot of faith in general in asian authors writing diaspora, but i think we forget that it's mikasa AND jean who have reservations about stopping eren—floch's yelling "where's mikasa" means he really thought jeankasa were both won over to the jaegerists. earlier she affirms to kiyomi that paradis is her home, which isn't like, pick-me shit, she really has no relationship to hizuru at all, and jean's hesitation isn't necessarily tribalism, he is correct in his understanding of eren's motivations of choosing paradis over the world, and mikasa's connection to one part of that outside world is understandably negligible

for all that my biggest beef with the premise of eldian/titan biology as just plain race science, yams at least skirts cultural/racial essentialism with mikasa. it's so funny to Me that she's the rudest to niccolo when he first cooks for them? she's so out of pocket, she straight up says "smells gross" and it's just so real, my mother accuses me of being not a real filipino because i don't like seafood like?? you raised me in the midwest, the california asians i befriended in college refused to eat landlocked sushi

[ourmondobongo]

I'm happy we got some Onyankopon <3

[melishade]

Attack on Prime Alternative Scenes Part 4

Part 3

Now this is going to be a long one and I am going to hate it, because guess who we're talking about today!

Gabi!

Look, full disclaimer. I am neutral about Gabi in terms of how she was written in AOT. I get what Isayama was going for with her, but because we knew her for so little, or course many people were obviously going to get mad that she killed a long time fan favorite. Sure, we've spent time with Gabi, but not enough to care about her compared to the main AOT cast.

I did write one scene where Megatron's confrontation with her is much more violent which prompts her to reflect on his words:

Megatron felt his anger rise to a level he hadn’t felt since he was the leader of the Deceptions. He kicked Gabi hard in the stomach, causing her to fall to her knees and clutch her stomach in pain.

Reiner and Colt tried to interfere, but Megatron raised his hand in front of the both of them.

“She needs to learn,” Megatron hissed in an ominous tone.

“You!” Gabi hissed as she stood up, “You don’t know a damn thing about honor! About serving a country! I’ve worked hard to get to where I am, and you still treat me like I’m a child!”

“Because you are!” Megatron shot back, “At least Falco and Colt listen! You always make one impulsive decision after another without a care in the world! That type of stupid attitude is going to get you killed!”

“Then I’ll die as a hero!” Gabi shouted, “Unlike you, who runs away from everything like a coward!”

“Gabi!” Reiner yelled.

“You’ll die as a fool and a waste!” Megatron shouted.

“You don’t know!” Gabi shouted, “You run away and have the audacity to tell me that I’m a coward! You wouldn’t know sacrifice! Or honor! Or glory! You-!...you…,”

Gabi stopped when Megatron lifted up his shirt. Pieck gasped in horror while Reiner looked ready to throw up. Zeke grew tense while Porco took a step back. They all could see the jagged scar that was smacked dead center of the titan’s chest that ran down from the top of his chest to the bottom of his abdomen.

“Go on,” Megatron challenged, “What were you saying? It must be such an honor, right? To die a hero?”

Gabi didn’t open her mouth as Megatron let go of his shirt. “It’s easy to die a hero, but it’s harder to live with the consequences of the horrible things you’ve done. You are a soldier! Not a child! Yet you act like a fucking fool! An arrogant stain on Marley military! Stop acting like an idiot! The world is never as simple as you think! Grow up!”

Gabi jolted when Megatron threw the rifle to the ground and stormed off.

This scene was supposed to contribute to her character development later, but I changed it in order to make Megatron more calm when it came to confronting Gabi. Also, also, I was originally going to have her be the reason they were captured by enemy forces in the other alternate scene and have Megatron go berserk, but that got scrapped. Here's the scene though:

Gabi walked outside to see Matthew sitting on the bench, wrapping his arms in bandages. She tensed when she saw him without his shirt, seeing the huge scar on his back match the one on his front along with other multiple scars.

Gabi took a deep breath and walked up to the man. “Um…Matthew?”

Matthew stopped wrapping the bandages and looked behind him to see her. Gabi wanted to cry when he saw him glaring at her with such disdain.

“What do you want, brat?” Matthew demanded as he continued wrapping the bandages.

“I…I wanted to apologize,” Gabi began, “It…was because of me that we got captured. I was brash…and reckless…my friends were hurt…and you were hurt. It was because of me. I’m sorry.”

Matthew finished wrapping the bandages before grabbing his shirt. “I don’t want to hear your half-assed apologies. I want to see action, which you clearly haven’t been able to demonstrate since day one. I would’ve cut you out a long time ago, but your unbridled devotion is what’s keeping you here. And because none of your superiors know whose fault it was that caused your capture.”

Matthew placed the shirt over his head. “I would tell your superiors it was you, but that would cause you to be stripped of your rank and being turned into a titan along with your family at the next battle.”

“I deserve it,” Gabi said without hesitation, “I’m a devil.”

Matthew smacked Gabi in her head hard. The girl clutched her head in pain and glared at him.

“What’s your problem?!” she shouted.

“You’re an idiot; that’s your problem,” Matthew answered, “Because you believe your life has no worth, you’re completely and utterly reckless in your actions. Wanting to be the best and not caring how you get there. You think the world is simply black and white. If you kill this person, Marley recognizes you. Follow their orders, Marley rewards you. Sacrifice your lifespan, Marley gives you an ‘honorary title’. You believe that Marley will grant you freedom once you get the founding titan. That all the discrimination and hatred will go away over night. It doesn’t. The world is more complex than you will ever know, and if you keep looking through rose colored glasses, you won’t get very far.”

Matthew stood up. “Your actions will reflect badly on your score in becoming a titan shifter. You will have to work to earn my confidence that you won’t blow yourself up on the next battle. Prove to me that you can grow and learn, and not shove my teachings down the gutter. Do you understand?”

Still, writing her in AOP was going to be a problem because I had to redeem her without having Sasha killed off! Then I remembered that Arcee was there and I was writing her to get attached to the humans. Originally, she and Sasha were going to be partners but that didn't work out. And then Ymir is still the Jaws Titan, so...Falco has no use in the story. So he gets shot!

But instead of Falco being knocked into a coma, he was supposed to survive and have a confrontation with Megatron, before Sasha takes Falco to stay at her parent's place with Arcee to protect him:

Falco slowly blinked as he opened his eyes. He found himself looking up at a brown ceiling and that he was lying down on a bed. He sat up and winced in pain when he looked down to see a bandage wrapped around his stomach.

“What…happened?” he asked himself.

“You were shot,” a voice answered.

Falco turned his attention and gasped in surprise to see Matthew standing at the foot of his bed with his arms crossed.

“Matthew,” Falco said, “W-what happened? Where am I?”

“Eren Jaeger attacked Liberio after Willy declared war,” Matthew explained.

“No, after,” Falco corrected, “I-I followed Gabi onto the ship. I must’ve gotten shot and fell over. Everything else was blurry after that. Matthew, where am I?”

“You’re on Paradis island,” Matthew explained before his voice dramatically changed, “And I am not Matthew Hayes.”

Falco felt a sense of dread and betrayal when the man’s voice changed. “No…not you too. Who are you?”

‘Matthew’ lifted his arm up and it began to change shape. Falco watched as it changed into one of that of the flying titan.

“You…you’re the flying titan,” Falco realized.

“Yes,” he answered in his true voice.

“All this time,” Falco began, trying to process the situation, “You lied to us. You’ve been lying to us for four years.”

“It’s clear that I’m not wanted. I’ll leave. I have to be informed about plans regarding the next attack.” The flying titan proclaimed as he was making his way out of the makeshift infirmary.

“Wait!” Falco exclaimed as he tried to reach out for him. Falco fell out of bed for reaching too far and landed on his side. He clutched his wound in pain as he curled in on himself.

Megatron heard the boy’s cry for pain as he was at the door. He debated his options and sighed to himself before walking back over to him. He picked the boy up before setting him back down on the bed.

“You shouldn’t exert yourself,” Megatron advised, “You’ll reopen your wound.”

“Why do you care?” Falco demanded as he still held onto his side, “You were sent to destroy us.”

“I was sent for recon,” Megatron declared as he grabbed a chair and sat down, “If I wanted to destroy you, believe me, I would have done it a long time ago.”

“Was anything you told us even true?” Falco asked.

“Some of it,” Megatron admitted, “A good lie holds some truth to it. The story regarding the scar on my shoulder was true to an extent. The creature I mentioned was of Cybertronian origin, not this world.”

“So the idea of leaving?” Falco asked.

“I had to play on the idea so I wouldn’t get caught,” Megatron explained, “I did have to come up with a reason to permanently stay until recon was finished.”

“…when you saved us,” Falco realized.

Megatron hummed in response. “Honestly, I’m not fond of seeing sparklings going to war and then dying immediately. At the very least, I wanted to ensure that you were ready.”

“But…that doesn’t make sense,” Falco admitted, “I’m a threat. I was one of the warrior candidates. You were teaching me to fight you.”

Megatron chuckled. “You are the furthest thing from a threat. I taught you how to fight, but I never taught you how to beat me. The style I’ve been teaching you in was one I wasn’t good at.”

“And…you still managed to fend off Annie during training,” Falco retorted.

“I’ve been fighting for my entire existence,” Megatron declared, “It’s nothing new.”

“I see,” Falco said before remembering something, “Gabi! Where is she?!”

“Prison,” Megatron answered, “She shot a Survey Corps member and nearly killed another. The two wheeler saved the other one, and that bullet she shot deflected off of her and hit you in your side. The one who nearly died saved you from falling to your death.”

“But you know her!” Falco exclaimed, “Can’t you do something for her!”

“She killed a human, injured another, and almost killed a second one,” Megatron deadpanned, “Even if I wanted to help her, there’s not much I can do for her.”

“But-!”

“Falco, this is war,” Megatron reminded, “Remember that. Not everything I taught you should go to waste.”

“So then…what will happen to me?” Falco asked, “Will I be thrown in prison?”

“No,” Megatron answered, “Because you didn’t do anything entirely stupid, I was able to create a case for you. The human that brat nearly killed decided to take you to her home for the time being. You’ll be staying with her family.”

“Why can’t you take me back home?” Falco demanded, “My brother. My family.”

“If I go back, I will be attacked by Marley troops,” Megatron explained, “While it will take time to kill me, it doesn’t change the fact that I can get injured and that there is no medic here.”

“But I’m still a prisoner,” Falco proclaimed.

“It could be worse,” Megatron reminded, “You could actually be thrown in a cell.”

“I guess,” Falco agreed, “But…why did you advocate for me? I’m your enemy, right?”

“I respect you to a degree, and your brother,” Megatron proclaimed as he stood up, “I figure it was the least I could do after everything. And you two are able to see Marley for the fools they are.”

“I didn’t think you’d care, considering what I’ve heard about you,” Falco admitted, “You still seem…okay.”

“Once you do here the entire story, that opinion will change. I can guarantee it,” Megatron proclaimed, “You’ll see me as a monster.”

“But…you’re all just normal people,” Falco reasoned, “You and everyone else here are not demons at all. You just want to live and survive. You only attacked because we attacked you first.”

“I’m surprised you’re taking this as well as you are,” Megatron admitted.

“That doesn’t change the fact that I am hurt,” Falco declared, “Eren made me send that stupid letter to his comrades, and you’ve been lying to us since day one.”

“…that doesn’t mean my actions were not real,” Megatron proclaimed as he turned to walk away.

“Wait!” Falco called out, “What is your real name?”

Megatron touched the handle of the door and sighed to himself. “Megatron.”

“Megatron,” Falco spoke before smiling, “Thank you…for advocating for me.”

Megatron didn’t respond as he opened the door and walked out the room.

===

Falco tensed up and hid behind Sasha when he saw Arcee in her bipedal mode. Sasha noticed this and held his hand.

“It’s okay,” Sasha whispered, “She’s not going to hurt you, I promise.”

“I…I’m not sure,” Falco admitted.

Sasha decided to ease the tension and greet Arcee. “Hey ‘Cee,”

Arcee looked down at Sasha and smiled before kneeling down. “Ready to go home?”

“You have no idea,” Sasha sighed with relief.

Arcee noticed Falco hiding behind Sasha. “You’re okay.”

Falco lifted his head from behind Sasha. “You…were worried?”

“You have no idea,” Arcee answered, “I’ve been through a lot. The last thing I wanted was a dead kid on my conscious.”

Falco fully removed himself from behind Sasha, but still stayed close to her.

“Call me Arcee,” she introduced herself.

“Falco,” he replied in kind.

“Well, Falco, I’ll be taking you to Sasha’s home,” Arcee explained, “You’ll be staying there until we figure something out.”

I still have more scenes with Falco but this whole portion of the storyline gets scrapped because of Arcee. The way I was building up Arcee throughout the story is to break down her ideology about black and white, good and evil, blah, blah, blah. She sees that through the victims of the war on Cybertron, but she obviously can't accept that so she ends up leaving. She's put in a situation where she is considered an enemy of the world, but she still can't stomach the idea of working together with Megatron. I needed Arcee to have one more break, which was Falco getting hurt and knocked into a coma, to ultimately break her black and white mentality. She needed to recognize in the worst way possible that she is a villain in the story.

Anyway, back to Gabi. There was one scene that I had written where Optimus does confront her about being from Marley instead of Megatron technically outing her:

Optimus noticed ‘Mia’ glaring at him after he waved goodbye to the vender. He walked over to her and offered her his hand so he could take her to his alt mode. She immediately swatted the hand away and took a step back.

“I assume you are still scared of me,” Optimus assumed. He wanted to get a truthful answer out of whoever this girl was. He knew she was lying to him; he just had to pinpoint exactly what it was.

“Stop trying to be nice,” ‘Mia’ hissed as she walked away from him.

“I am trying to help you,” Optimus reasoned, “I wish to make sure you are safe.”

“So you can rectify your unforgivable sins, you devil?!” ‘Mia’ exclaimed.

Optimus stared in surprise while ‘Mia’ covered her mouth in fear.

“You are…from Marley?” Optimus asked in surprise, causing the girl to take steps back away from her.

“N-no,” she shook her head, “I’m not.”

Optimus knew she was trying to lie again and instead tried to put the pieces together of who she was. No one besides the Eldianrestorationists should be back from Marley. He remembered that two enemy soldiers stormed Wheeljack’s ship. One of them was with Sasha, and the other…was thrown in prison.

“You are,” Optimus concluded.

“No I’m not!” the girl cried, “Leave me alone! Or I’ll scream!”

“No, don’t scream,” Optimus pleaded, “The island will take my word over yours. If they so much as learn who you are, you’ll be sent back into military hands and I cannot control what will happen to you then. You have to trust me.”

“Why should I do that?” the girl hissed.

“Because I can get you off the island and back to Marley,” Optimus answered, before listening to footsteps approaching them, “I know you have no reason to trust me, but I can find you a way back to your home.”

The girl still looked like she was debating her options as the footsteps almost rounded the building. Optimus thought quick and grabbed the girl and picked her up.

“Pretend you are sleeping,” Optimus whispered to her as a woman rounded the building and saw them.

“Is everything alright?” the woman asked, “I thought I heard fighting.”

“Everything is fine,” Optimus reassured, “Mia was just tired, that is all.”

Optimus felt the girl tighten her grip on the holoform jacket and tuck her face into his neck.

“Oh, the poor thing,” the woman sighed, “I can loan you something for her if you’d like.”

“Do not worry. I have what I need for her,” Optimus proclaimed, “Thank you for the kind offer.”

Optimus watched the woman walk away before quietly sighing with relief. He then turned his attention to the girl, who still hid her face in his shoulder.

“It is alright now,” Optimus reassured as he was about to set the girl down, but she tightened her grip even more now.

“You…didn’t tell her,” the girl addressed him without moving her face.

“Of course I did not,” Optimus said.

“Why would you save your enemy?” the girl demanded.

“You are not my enemy,” Optimus declared.

“Then why would you save me, devil?” the girl demanded, “You’ve caused destruction of lives throughout the world for over 1,000 years. You’re a demon. You hate anyone that isn’t like you. You attacked my home, killed my friends, and killed my mentor. He wasn’t even my mentor. He lied to us all.”

“Mentor…?” Optimus questioned before realizing who this girl was, “You are Gabi Braun?”

The girl finally lifted her head and glared at Optimus. “So Matthew told you about me?”

Optimus noticed the pain and shame in the girl’s eyes and felt guilty. “What exactly did he tell you?”

Gabi didn’t respond as she placed her head back on his shoulder. “That I’m a failure. That I’m incompetent. That my recklessness gets people I love killed.”

Optimus placed his hand on Gabi’s head as he walked over to his alt mode. “You are just frightened and terrified. That does not make you a failure.”

“I’m a warrior,” Gabi declared, “I’m not supposed to show fear. I’m supposed to gladly lay down my life for my people and my country. I must atone for my sins.”

“What sins?” Optimus asked.

“The sins my ancestors have caused,” Gabi explained.

Optimus arrived at his alt mode and placed Gabi by the passenger door. “What have you done specifically that would warrant you to be called a devil?”

Gabi looked up at the Prime. “My ancestors-,”

“I am not talking about your ancestors,” Optimus interrupted, “I am speaking of you, specifically.”

“I…I stormed your ship,” Gabi explained, “Tried you kill one of your own. I…I’ve killed so many people so that I could gain respect from Marley.”

“Because you were not given much of a choice,” Optimus proclaimed, “You were given so few options in order to survive, and you were placed into war, which forces people to sacrifice their morality in order to survive. You were told that you had to give your life because of what your people have done in the past. A single person should not be defined by what their ancestors have done.”

“What my ancestors have done is unforgivable,” Gabi proclaimed.

“But you have not done those things,” Optimus proclaimed.

“You have no right to tell me this,” Gabi proclaimed, “You’re a demon. You’ve plundered and destroyed the world and left nothing but blood. You’re a murderer.”

Optimus sighed as he sat down in front of her. “Perhaps you are right,”

Gabi blinked in surprise before scowling. “Of course I’m right.”

“But not in the way that you think,” Optimus continued, “I have killed many. I have killed many of my own people in a civil war that destroyed my world. I have had to make difficult choices that would result in heavy consequences. And I had to fight Matthew: someone I once considered brother. I was not there for him when he needed me, and…he lost his way.”

Gabi scowl disappeared as she stared at Optimus in surprise. She remembered the tale Matthew told her years ago and the pieces finally fell into place. “You…you’re the librarian?”

Optimus was startled by Gabi’s question, but continued. “Yes, I am. I did not expect you to know about me.”

“Matthew told us about you,” Gabi explained, “He was…trying to teach us a lesson.”

“And what was he trying to teach you?” Optimus asked.

“That…the world is not black and white,” Gabi answered.

Optimus blinked in response before huffing and giving a sad smile. “That is the unfortunate truth of the universe. If the world were black and white, I would have killed Matthew to end the war and stop the destruction of our planet a long time ago. But I let my attachment to him cloud my judgment, and as a result, it prolonged our war to unforeseen circumstances. I lost my home, my mentor, my brother, my lover. I lost so much.”

“Then…why?” Gabi asked, “Why would you continue to fight when you’ve practically lost?”

Gabi was startled when Optimus placed a gentle hand on her shoulder.

“I continue to fight, so that someone like you will never have to experience the pain and sorrow that I have felt,” Optimus declared.

This scene wasn't included or it had to be severely changed. I originally was going to have Megatron bring up Orion to the Marleyans, but that ultimately got scrapped because Megatron would never talk about that to the enemy, no matter how fond he's gotten of them. He does end up calling Orion a 'naive little shit' Lol. But I mainly wrote these scenes because in order for Gabi to be redeemed I thought that having her be around Optimus would be a good start.

And before that, Kiyomi was originally supposed to find out about Gabi, and offers Optimus to help watch her when in reality she wants to interrogate her. Also, ignore the misspelling of Kiyomi's name. I wrote this a while ago:

Gabi glared at Kyomi as the woman sat down and poured herself some wine. She clenched the chair she was in as she felt eyes on the back of her head as she glanced back at the two guards behind her at the doors.

“I’m just a simple child,” Gabi tried to reason, “What’s with the security?”

Kyomi took a small sip as she looked Gabi dead in the eye. “Do you really think I’d forget your face? I saw all four of you when I helped your friend avoid getting turned into a titan when he spilled wine all over me.”

Gabi began trembling.

“And what do you know, two Eldian warriors storm the titan’s ship and kill a Survey Corps member,” Kyomi added, “And by the flying titan’s account, both were trained warriors.”

Gabi growled in anger. “You traitor.”

Kyomi huffed in response. “That was fast.”

“Shut up!” Gabi shouted, “You could’ve told someone about these demons! Instead, you’re working with them! You’re just as evil as them! Eldian sympathizer!”

“That should be good for you,” Kyomi reminded calmly, “Considering the fact I could just as easily turn you over to the government and probably have you executed.”

Gabi’s face dropped and her whole body filled with dread.

“Or I could tell Optimus, since he clearly doesn’t know who you are,” Kyomi continued.

“Y-you can’t do that,” Gabi proclaimed.

“Says who?” Kyomi demanded.

“Marley will come for me,” Gabi warned, “They’ll come and-,”

“I doubt they would come for an expendable warrior,” Kyomi proclaimed, “They’ll just pluck another Eldian to take your place. When they come, they’re coming to avenge the non-Eldians. Not you.”

“My friends are dead,” Gabi hissed, “Zofia was crushed by a boulder. Udo was trampled to death. Falco…falco…,”

“He’s dead because of you,” the flying titan’s voice echoed in her mind.

“It’s because of those titans,” Gabi hissed, “It’s because of those demons. Eren killed my friends. Those titans trampled my home! It was because of them!”

Gabi looked at Kyomi with such fury. “WHAT GIVES YOU THE RIGHT TO LECTURE ME WHEN YOU’VE BETRAYED YOUR OWN KIND?!”

Kyomi put the glass down. “You want my personal opinion: I’m just doing this for profit. I think it’s just better to work with the person that has the goods instead of trying to blow them up. If people thought like that instead of the nonsense they think of now, this world would be better off.  If you took the time to actually talk to the people at the harbor, you’d realize that they’re not demons.”

“They are,” Gabi declared, “Especially that flying titan and the metal titan!”

Kyomi broke face and began to snicker. Gabi felt insulted when the woman began giggling.

“The flying titan destroyed my home!” Gabi shouted.

“He did,” Kyomi said, “He also could’ve destroyed it four years ago if he wanted to but he didn’t. Matthew doesn’t deny that he’s a demon. He’s played that role for so long that he’s come to accept the backlash. I’m laughing about your opinion on the metal titan. Optimus Prime has done nothing but take care of you, and all you’ve done is curse and spit at him.”

“He’s a demon!” Gabi exclaimed, “He wanted to destroy my home!”

Kyomi sighed. “I’m going to let you in on some confidential information.”

“Ma’am,” one of the guards spoke.

Kyomi raised her hand in response before turning to Gabi. “Optimus never wanted to attack Liberio. No one did.”

Gabi stared in disbelief.

“Eren went rogue on his own,” Kyomi continued, “He left the island without informing anyone. The original plan was to find Eren and bring him back to the island before he did anything dangerous. When it became clear that Eren had full intentions of attacking Liberio on his own, everyone was cornered with a decision: help Eren attack Liberio and kill innocent people, or let Eren attack on his own and have the Founding Titan power redacted. The flying titan already had the information he needed, and had no issue with killing. The other two titan were complacent; they had their own friends they needed to protect. Optimus kept up vocal opposition until the end. He said he would remain on the island to defend it in the event a fleet came and attacked. In reality, he just didn’t want to kill any humans.”

Gabi shook her head in response. “I-I don’t believe you.”

“Did Optimus hurt you?” Kyomi asked, “Did Optimus attack you? Did Optimus harm you in any way?”

Gabi didn’t respond.

“There’s your answer,” Kyomi said, “Optimus protects humans; he doesn’t hurt them.”

“He’s still a demon,” Gabi whispered.

“Still in denial,” Kyomi sighed, “I should tell Optimus who you are, or any official for that matter, but I know that you just want to go back to Marley.”

Gabi grew worried at her statement.

“I clearly can’t take you,” Kyomi proclaimed, “The Amizubitos will be outed and attacked. I can’t risk my nation being destroyed. My advice to you, if you want to stay alive: stay with Optimus Prime.”

“Stay?!” Gabi shouted.

“There are others still outside,” Kyomi reminded.

Gabi closed her mouth.

“The fact that you killed one of their own will no doubt get you killed,” Kyomi explained, “Breaking out of prison doesn’t help your case either. Staying with Optimus will increase your chances at survival. He doesn’t harm human, and you’re a child. He’ll give you special treatment and make sure your safe under his care until he can get you a home. It’s not like you have any other options, anyway.”

“…what if…he finds out who I am?” Gabi hesitantly asked.

Kyomi thought it over. “I don’t think he would hurt you.”

“Why?” Gabi asked.

“Every sentient being deserves an opportunity for redemption,” Kyomi quoted, “His words. Not mine.”

Gabi scoffed in response. “That’s stupid.”

“It’s what he believes,” Kyomi proclaimed, “It’s not something bad to hold on to.”

Also the final confrontation between them was supposed to be a little bit different too:

“Gabi, are you alright?!” Optimus asked with concerned as he examined the bruise on her arm.

Gabi grew angry and pulled her arm from Optimus’ grip. She tried to shove him away, but she merely fell backwards and hit her head on the side of Optimus’ alt mode.

“Gabi-!”

“Stop it! Just stop it, you devil!” Gabi shouted.

“Gabi-,”

“Is this some kind of sick twisted joke to you?!” Gabi demanded, “I am a devil! A demon! Why are you risking your life for me?!”

“Gabi, they would have killed you if I handed you over to them,” Optimus reasoned.

“I’m your enemy!” Gabi shouted, “You were supposed to hand me over to them! Instead, you protect me?! Are you out of your mind?! You’re an idiot! A fucking idiot! You’re trying to manipulate me to trust me before you kill me yourself!”

Gabi stood up. “You’re a demon! A devil! Do us both a favor and die!”

Gabi didn’t know what came over her as she punched Optimus square in the face. She felt her heart stop and dread go through her as Optimus touched his cheek. What did she do?! The titan saved her, and she decided to punch him! Now he would no doubt try to kill her now! She doomed herself! She was going to die! The flying titan was right! Her idiocy was going to get her killed!

Gabi fell back down as Optimus stood up and looked down at her. She trembled in fear and was ready to cry. She then watched in confusion as Optimus walked away from her towards a small bush of blue flowers.

“I understand your hatred of me,” Optimus began as he knelt down and picked the flowers one-by-one, “I understand you want me dead after the attack of your home. If it was my choice, I would not have attacked a place full of innocent humans, but it is war. War does not spare the weak. It only takes as it leaves nothing in its path but death and destruction. It does not matter who is in the right or wrong, many will die.”

Gabi tensed when Optimus stood up and walked over to her before sitting down in front of her. “You are a soldier because you were given such few options. Because of your heritage. You are seen as a demon by the people you serve, and as a result, you believe yourself to be a demon.”

“That’s not-,”

“You wish to become great,” Optimus continued as he weaved the flowers together, “You wish to become powerful so that you will mean something to someone. You wish to be recognized by the ones who do not care for your own life at all. When you are met with others who wish to help you that have no alliance with Marley, you curse them and say they do not matter. Marley only wishes for you to become great because they wanted to use you as a weapon. They do not care for you as a person.

“You’re afraid that everything Marley taught you is wrong. You’re afraid of the reality that someone you loved attacked and killed innocent people. You scream and cry out in fear. You’re afraid of being considered weak. You do not believe your life has value.”

Gabi watched Optimus finish weaving the flowers into a crown. “The island sees you as an enemy. That is understandable. The world sees you as a devil. That is unforgivable.”

Gabi shut her eyes in fear as Optimus placed the crown on her head. “All I see, is a little girl. I see a little girl who wants nothing more than to return home.”

Gabi shakily touch the crown on her head as looked Optimus in the eye. “What…what do you want from me?”

“I just want you to see that you are human,” Optimus answered.

“I’m…I’m not,” Gabi whispered, recalling her memories of the four year war. She began recalling the way she treated her friends, and how they were now six feet under. She remembered the way she killed her enemies, both Eldians and others. She remembered Falco, and how her foolishness got a bullet in his side and caused him to bleed out. It was her fault. She was the one who did that, and she was powerless to do a thing.

“I’m a devil,” Gabi whispered as tears rolled down her cheek, “I killed people. I was cruel to my friends. I didn’t get to tell them that I cared, and now their dead. They’re dead because of me. I deserve to die. I…I…”

Gabi covered her eyes with her hands and began crying. “I’m so horrible!”

Gabi screamed and cried as she sobbed loudly. Optimus could only watch with sorrow before wrapping his arms around her. She tensed in fear as Optimus placed his hand on her head.

“It is alright,” Optimus reassured, “You are allowed to cry. You are allowed to be human.”

Gabi felt her hands move to Optimus’ arms and she gripped them tightly. She put her face on Optimus’ shoulder and continued crying. The tension in her body leaving, realizing she didn’t fear the titan. The titan would protect her, and keep her safe.

Yeah, in the original outline, Pieck was never in the scene. She was supposed to be tailing Eren originally. Then I had the whole 'shadow' idea so I had to change course. Also, I thought Optimus making Gabi a flower crown would have been nice but I don't think he would know how to do that.

So originally I was going to have Levi and Kenny find Optimus together, after Kenny and Levi have a rather heated conversation after the Killer saves the Captain's life from Zeke. Optimus remembers Falco's location and ends up going to the cabin with all three of them to drop of Gabi and pick up Sasha:

Optimus helped Gabi out of his alt mode before kneeling down in front of her. “I need you to stay here.”

“No!” Gabi exclaimed while shaking her head.

“Gabi-,”

“No, I want to stay with you!” Gabi pleaded.

“Gabi, where we are going is dangerous,” Optimus explained, “You could be killed.”

“He’s right,” Levi reasoned, “The military wants you dead, and there’s a chance Eren and Zeke are raising hell as we speak. You’d be dead in an instant.”

“But-!”

“Gabi, look at me,” Optimus pleaded, earning the girl’s attention, “This is the best option for you. I will come back for you; you have my word, but you need to stay here.”

“…I’m scared…,” Gabi whimpered as she hugged the Prime.

“I know you are, but this is the safest place for you right now,” Optimus declared.

“How are you sure?” Gabi asked.

Gabi gasped when the door opened to reveal the woman who went to rescue Falco on the ship two months ago. She was now in civilian attired with a bow in hand and arrows in her quiver. Gabi yelped in fear and hid behind Optimus as she drew her arrow.

“It’s not for you,” Optimus whispered.

Gabi peaked over Optimus shoulder to see the woman directing her weapon at Kenny who had his hands up in surrender.

“Stand down,” Levi ordered, “He’s on our side.”

“I’m not convinced,” Sasha declared.

“Too bad sharpshooter,” Kenny hissed, “You’re gonna have to work with me.”

“Why the hell should I do that?” Sasha demanded.

“Zeke escaped,” Levi explained, “He’s infected the wine from Marley with his titan fluid and has been feeding it to the military.”

Sasha stared in fear as she lowered her bow. “Hanji and the others? Where are they?”

“Fine,” Kenny answered, “They didn’t drink the wine and Erwin got them out in time.”

“We are heading over to them now,” Optimus declared as he stood up, “I know this is much to take in, but we need as many soldiers as possible.”

Sasha turned her attention to Gabi, who was trying her best to hide behind Optimus. “And what about her?”

“Can she remain here with your family?” Optimus asked, “Where we are going, it will not be safe for her.”

“Depends,” Sasha answered before turning to Gabi, “You’re not going to try and kill me, right? That bullet would’ve gone through my heart if Arcee wasn’t there,”

Gabi furiously shook her head. “No, I’ll be good. I promise.”

Sasha thought over her options, but sighed in irritation. “Doesn’t seem like I have a choice due to the time crunch. Fine, she can stay. Falco, Gabi’s here!”

Gabi heart stopped as she stepped in front of Optimus. Falco? Falco was here? No…Falco was dead…her bullet when through his side. He bled out…right?

Gabi’s breath got lodged in her throat as she saw Falco walking out the house in perfect health. She noticed the bandage wrapped around his waist under his shirt and began trembling. Falco didn’t seem to notice as he smiled with joy.

“Gabi!” Falco exclaimed as he ran to her and gave her a hug, “I’m so glad to see you! Did they let you out of prison?! What’s with the flower crown?!”

Gabi couldn’t handle it anymore and her legs gave out. She fell to her knees and out of Falco’s grasp, startling the boy.

“Gabi, what’s wrong?” Falco asked in surprise.

Falco didn’t know what to do when tears began forming in Gabi’s eyes. She ended up taking a deep breath and loudly sobbed. Falco immediately got on his knees as a fountain of tears poured out.

“Gabi-!” Falco wasn’t able to get a word out as Gabi tightly hugged her friend.

“I’m sorry!” Gabi sobbed through her tears, “I’m so sorry!”

“It’s fine! I’m fine!” Falco tried to reason before turning to the three men in front of him, “Why is she like this?!”

“Right, forgot to mention. Megatron told Gabi that you were dead,” Kenny answered.

“What?!” Falco exclaimed.

“What the hell?!” Sasha demanded.

“Permission to shoot buckethead in the face,” Levi said.

“Granted,” Optimus allowed.

Mr. Blause came walking to the door with coffee in hand when he heard the loud sobbing. He was startled to see all these people at his doorstep and looked down at his coffee cup.

“I think this ain’t healthy,” he commented.

“Pa, I gotta go,” Sasha told him, “Take care of that girl, Gabi, okay?”

“’Kay,” Mr. Blause agreed before hugging his daughter, “Be safe. Love ya’.”

“Love ya’, too,” Sasha replied back as he hugged him. She let go of her father before running towards Optimus’ alt mode. She hopped into the back while Kenny jumped into the passenger seat. Optimus deactivated his holoform and opened the driver door for Levi. The captain jumped in before Optimus revved his engine and drove away from the house.

Mr. Blause sighed in irritation about the chaos before looking down at Falco and the newcomer still crying. Mr. Blause set his coffee cup down and walked over to the two and kneeled down.

“Heya,” he greeted, “Ya’ look tired,”

Gabi glared at the man while tightening her grip on Falco.

“Gabi, it’s okay,” Falco reassured, “His family let me stay with them.”

Gabi was still unsure as she watched the adult with caution.

“How ‘bout I take you to a nice bed and ya’ get some rest b’foreya’ eat somethin’?” Mr. Blause suggested.

Gabi was really tempted by the offer, and gave into her exhaustion. She let go of Falco and nodded her head quietly.

“I can carry ya’,” Mr. Blause offered.

Gabi felt her guard go down as Mr. Blause picked her up and carried her into the house with Falco following behind.

So originally, Megatron was going to tell Gabi that Falco was dead instead of alive in order to break her mentally and keep her in the prison. He didn't want her having the motivation to escape. She ultimately did in this version, and she ends up under Optimus, who leads her right back to Falco.

There were also a few other scenes on the farm:

Gabi opened her eyes and rubbed her head before sitting up. She noticed that she was in someone’s room and the bed she was on was right next to the window.

Gabi felt the blankets shift and looked down to see Falco resting his head on the bed while he was sitting in a chair. Gabi was going to cry again when she saw Falco breathing. He…he’s alive. Falco’s alive.

Gabi slowly reached out and touched Falco’s head. The boy slowly opened his eyes and raised his head. He rubbed his eyes before looking directly at Gabi.

“Hey,” Falco said.

“Where…are we?” Gabi asked.

“We’re at Sasha Blause’s home,” Falco explained, “She let me stay here instead of getting sent to prison.”

“Oh…,” Gabi weakly responded.

“Gabi, are you-…,” Falco stopped himself short. She probably wasn’t okay. She thought for months that he was dead, and from the looks of it, she blamed herself for it.

“Gabi, I’m alive,” Falco told her, “I’m here, and we’ll find a way to get back home together.”

Gabi looked down at Falco’s shirt to see the bandages around his waist. Falco noticed the direction of her gaze and pulled down the shirt. He then pulled her into a hug, startling the girl.

“But…but I hurt you,” Gabi reminded, “You almost died because of me.”

“You would’ve never hurt me on purpose,” Falco proclaimed, “And I’m here now. It’s okay.”

Gabi wrapped her arms around Falco’s waist, causing him to wince. Gabi quickly let go of him with fear and concern.

“The wound’s not completely healed yet,” Falco explained, “I’ll be fine though.”

Gabi wrapped her arms around his neck. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“Gabi-,”

“I was always mean to you. I always looked down on you,” Gabi cut him off, “I never…,”

Gabi began crying again in his shoulder. “I hurt you. I almost killed you.”

Gabi obviously needed to apologize to Falco for calling him a bad friend. And there's a much more positive interaction between Kaya and Gabi:

”Can’t believe Megatron told you I was dead,” Falco admitted.

Gabi looked at Falco. “That’s Matthew’s real name?”

Falco nodded his head. “I wasn’t aware he faked his death, so when I woke up in the hospital, kind of thought I was back in Marley. Then I heard him talking differently, and he told me who he was and what he was doing.”

“So…why were you sent here?” Gabi asked, “How come you weren’t put in prison?”

“Megatron advocated for me,” Falco explained, “He told the military here that I was much more rationale and wouldn’t try to kill anyone. He even said I most likely got on the ship to try and stop you. So the woman, Sasha, decided to take me here and allow me to recover. When I asked him about you, he said there was nothing he could do since you tried to kill one of their own.”

“…He could be lying to you,” Gabi proclaimed, “He lied to me. He lied to everyone. Udo and Zofia are dead. Liberio’s been destroyed.”

“From what I heard, Eren Jaeger was the one who launched the attack by himself in the first place,” Falco proclaimed.

“How could you have heard that?” Gabi demanded.

“I heard some of them talking,” Falco explained, “They said they threw Eren into prison.”

“No excuse for what Megatron did,” Gabi declared, “Did…did he even care about us? Every action he did, was it because he cared, or was it because he was trying not to get caught?”

“…can’t say for certain,” Falco admitted, “Maybe he did, maybe he didn’t. I don’t know.”

“I hate him,” Gabi declared.

“…I don’t know if I can,” Falco admitted.

“Hi,” a voice greeted.

The two looked up to see a blonde girl holding two sandwiches, offering both of it to them. Falco smiled and took the both of it from her hands. He handed one to Gabi, and she took it from his hands.

“Can I sit with you two?” she asked politely.

“Sure,” Falco answered.

Gabi grew tense when the girl sat down next to her. She grew even more nervous when she held out her hand to her.

“I’m Kaya,” she introduced herself.

“…Gabi,” she meekly responded as she shook Kaya’s hand.

“You’re from Marley, like Falco, right?” she asked.

Gabi nodded her head.

“So…you probably think I’m a devil right?” Kaya asked.

Gabi pulled her knees up to her chest. She didn’t know what to think anymore.

“I…,” Gabi trailed off, unable to come up with a response.

“It’s okay,” Kaya reassured, “You were raised in Marley. I can’t blame you for your way of thinking.”

Gabi was startled by the girl’s response. She didn’t yell at her, or curse her out.

“Falco, do you know when my sister’s coming back?” Kaya asked.

“I’m not sure,” Falco answered, “It seemed pretty urgent when she left. I don’t know what’s going on.”

“…Zeke broke out,” Gabi declared.

“What?!” Falco exclaimed while Kaya looked in surprise.

“He broke out, and now he might turn people here into titans,” Gabi proclaimed.

“…that’s terrifying,” Kaya remarked.

“How are you not worried?!” Falco exclaimed.

Kaya quickly shushed him before continuing. “I am worried, but I know that the Survey Corps and the Autobots will do everything they can to stop it.”

“’Autobots’?” Gabi questioned.

“Arcee, Wheeljack, and Optimus,” Kaya listed, “They’re called Autobots, and they advocate for the protection of life. I don’t know about Megatron though. Every time I ask Sasha about it, she would give me this uncomfortable look and said that ignorance was better.”

“Do you know anything about Megatron?” Gabi asked.

“Not really,” Kaya answered, “Arcee would tell us tales of battles she had on both her home and on Earth, but she didn’t really talk about Megatron much.”

“Who’s Arcee?” Gabi asked.

“The blue Autobot,” Kaya explained, “She’s extremely agile and fast. She’s my sister’s partner.”

“I hate her,” Gabi hissed, earning a worried look from Falco.

“Is it because she was part of the Liberio attack?” Kaya asked.

Gabi looked at Falco and felt a wave of guilt rush over her.

“Arcee didn’t mean for me to get injured,” Falco explained, “She felt guilty when the bullet hit me and was glad that I was alive. She even came to me in the hospital and apologized to me.”

“Arcee wanted to apologize to you too, but since you were in prison, she never got the chance,” Kaya continued, “She never wanted to attack Liberio. None of the titans did.”

“Then why did they?!” Gabi exclaimed, “Why did they trample my home into the ground?! Why did they kill Udo and Zofia?! Why did those devils attack us?!”

“Gabi!” Falco exclaimed before grabbing her hand.

“…because it’s war,” Kaya answered, earning both of their attention, “Arcee has always told me and Sasha that war was terrible. She had to get her hands dirty in order to survive. She struggled so much to keep her morality while fighting a group that wouldn’t hesitate to kill their own in a heartbeat. It doesn’t matter who you are or what you’ve done. People will end on dying, because one side feels right. It’s why…,”

Gabi felt her stomach turn as Kaya began to cry. “It’s why my mom was devoured by a titan. It’s why our country was devastated. It’s why Arcee lost her home, and why the Survey Corps attacked Liberio. It was because of war.”

“War is a cruel and terrible thing,” Gabi remembered Optimus saying, “It kills and destroys until no one is left. You’re only given the option to survive, and must sacrifice everything in order to do so.”

“…I’m…sorry,” Gabi said quietly, earning a shocked look from Falco.

“It’s okay,” Kaya reassured as she wiped away her tears, “You were born in Marley, and told to think a certain way.”

Gabi removed her hand from Falco’s grip as he stared in disbelief. Gabi would never say stuff like this. She would never apologize. She would never be kind to the people she had been told were demons. What the hell caused this change?

“So…,” Kaya began, wanting to change the topic, “What’s Optimus like?”

Gabi stared at her in surprise. “Huh?”

“You actually got to meet Optimus and spend time with him,” Kaya said, “I’ve always wanted to meet him, but I missed my chance when Optimus came here. Arcee always told me and the others stories of battles they fought together. I’ve always wanted to know what he truly was like. You spent time with Optimus, so what did you think of him?”

Falco became worried once more. What was Gabi going to say? She already hated Megatron, what could she say that could possibly make this-

“Kind,” Gabi answered, “Optimus is…really kind.”

Falco stared in shock. What?!

“Optimus protected me and was willing to take care of me,” Gabi continued, “Even when he figured out that I was from Marley, he was stilling willing to help me get back home to safety. He protected me from his own allies and saved my life over and over.”

Gabi let out a self-deprecating laugh. “Even when I called him a devil and cursed him out, he saved my life. I…just hope I get the chance to apologize to him when he comes back. And tell him thank you for protecting me.”

Yeah, there was a lot going on, but this originally happened because Sasha was supposed to be bringing Arcee to the farm more often, and the Autobot would tell stories to Kaya and the other kids, which is why Kaya knew more than the average person.

I think that's all I have for right now because this is a lot. And as I'm scanning through my old documents, I'm realizing I'm missing a lot more shit. Lol. I'll post it later with time. Just enjoy.

[thena0315]

Attack on Titan - Season 4 Part 3 Part 1

The Alliance mourning Hange’s sacrifice to let them all escape The Rumbling

[karizard-ao3]

This isn’t clueless teens related but because of the whole Azumabito royalty legacy, I hc Gothkasa’s family being stupidly rich, even if they decide to live normal lives. Eren asks her about this once and Mikasa is very casual, like “oh yes, my great-grandfather was a prince but came to live here. We’re distant cousins but we still see the family from time to time”. The family in question being, of course, the Hizuran royal family

I also imagine modern au Azumabitos being rich! I picture them as business royalty more so than actual royalty, though. But they're pretty much at the top of the business world.

I feel like Gothkasa's parents are both successful, especially her mom, and she inherited that Azumabito head for making money (which I did kind of sneak into clueless teens, even though we're not talking about that).

I don't know, I just love the idea of secret rich girl Gothkasa.

[corner-stories]

handwriting

Jean Kirschtein. Mikasa Ackerman. Chemistry Notes. Lacrosse Games. Shiba Inus. High School AU. 2870 words. (ao3.) | part 1

The pressed forget-me-not rides in Mikasa’s textbook, the one with flowers doodled into the margins. It stays there as she attends her final class of the day, then heads off to soccer practice. 

She forgets about the note and the flower as she runs down the field, chasing the ball as she scrimmages with her teammates. She practices assists with Historia and shooting drills with Mina at the net until the sun disappears on the horizon. 

When Mikasa heads home, she enters the house on the west side of town. She calmly greets her Aunt Kiyomi in the living area, as well as the Azumabito household’s resident Shiba Inu. The dog screams in delight upon seeing its favorite human. Mikasa turns down her Auntie’s offer to watch a movie together and retires to her room for the night. 

After changing out of her clothes and into something more comfortable, she flops down onto her bed and wonders how difficult sleep will be tonight. As she rests, the dog pushes its way through her ajar door and hops onto her bed, immediately making itself comfortable amongst the cushions. Mikasa doesn’t protest and lets Panko Ackerman-Azumabito rest his head against her thigh. 

But before Mikasa drifts off to sleep, she remembers the flower she slipped into her textbook. 

Hopping off the bed, Mikasa goes to the backpack on the floor and digs inside. Panko can only sit up and watch in confusion. 

When Mikasa procures her textbook, she goes to her desk and finds the flower and note. 

It hasn’t changed since the moment she saw it fall out of her locker. It feels so small as she holds it in her fingers, as if the stems or the leaves could wither and rot if she does something wrong. 

That same feeling of curiosity fires up in her head, the one she experienced when initially finding the flower. 

She can’t even fathom who could have sent the note. She barely talks to people in school, reserving most of her words for answering questions or communicating with her soccer teammates. 

She’s not even sure which class she shares with the person. She doodles in her textbook during all of them. 

Mikasa holds the note in the light and looks it over again, trying to find some trace of identity aside from the phrase “I heard you liked flowers” scribbled onto the lines. But alas, she can’t find it. 

She reads the message over and over again, committing it to memory, everything from the hue of the pen to the intricacies of the handwriting. 

Questions dance fervently in her head. 

Who sent this? Why did they send it? Why didn’t they sign the note? And why a forget-me-not?

Then after a moment, Mikasa lets out a sigh. She slips the note and flower into her journal and tucks it away into her desk drawer. 

When she goes to sleep that night, her dreams feel blank and grey. 

…

…

…

Jean tries not to get hung up on his gesture. To be frank, he had not put any thought into what the aftermath of his gift would be. 

What is he to do now? Keep watching Mikasa during study hall? Pray that she somehow figures it out? Or go under a rock and die?

With the feeling of despair currently making his chest feel like an empty hole, Jean highly considers option three. 

The seconds after seeing Mikasa holding his pressed forget-me-not turns into minutes, then hours, then a whole day passes and he still can’t shake the sight from his head. He swore he saw her smiling, even if it was just for a little bit. 

At least when Jean wakes up the next morning, the initial shock is gone. He doesn’t feel as torn and sick as he did the day before, but still he barely touches his breakfast while going through his daily existential crisis.

After heading to school, Jean is thankful to have a reason to distract himself. He’s never been a slacker, but today he makes his chemistry notes extra thorough as an excuse to not think about that one certain thing. He doesn’t even joke around when Sasha falls asleep beside him. 

The hours and classes drag on, then soon Jean heads to the fateful study hall that started it all. 

As he navigates the hallway, the nervous knot in his stomach returns. With a sigh, Jean pulls his green hoodie over his head and places his headphones over his ears. He blasts the first song he can find to drown out the noise. 

When he enters the room Mikasa’s in her usual spot, except instead of drawing in her textbook or going over her homework, her glassy eyes are scanning the classroom. 

The knot in Jean’s stomach gets worse, much worse. He tries not to look like a deer-in-the-headlights as he scrambles to his seat.

Throughout class he doesn’t even spare a glance at her, fearing that doing so would lead to dire consequences. He’s probably put her on edge now, as she’ll be extra vigilant in order to find out the identity of her secret admirer. 

So to not rouse suspicion that the big dumb lacrosse player took the time to press a flower for a girl he liked, Jean goes over his chemistry notes like he’s trying to find the cure for cancer. 

…

…

…

The days go on and the lingering thought of the flower in her locker begins to fade. Mikasa keeps herself occupied with other things — soccer practice, SAT prep, or the university brochures that her Aunt kindly placed on her desk. 

Kiyomi is always observant, but either she hasn’t noticed her niece being preoccupied by something else or is too kind to bring it up. 

Around this time of year, in the midst of spring, Mikasa gets particularly glum. When she feels the remaining chill of winter melting away, it’s hard for her to feel entirely happy. The anniversary of her parent’s death — which happened barely a month after her ninth birthday — has been igniting her lingering grief for nearly a decade.  

At least Mikasa wakes up one morning to find an intricately prepared bento box in the fridge. The note on it reminds her to bring it to school. Kiyomi has always done this, leaving ample amounts of food in her niece’s vicinity to counteract Mikasa’s habit of not eating when she’s sad. It’s always nice to know that Kiyomi cares in her own way. 

One day Mikasa is standing near the net during soccer practice. Beside her Sasha — the team’s left winger — and her current partner for working on assists. 

As they work together to slowly kick a line of balls into the net, Sasha chats to Mikasa about whatever’s on her mind. Their interactions are usually like this, Sasha being a motor mouth while Mikasa nods along with her usual stoic, emotionless expression. Whether they be at practice or eating lunch together, it’s always the same. At least Mikasa can find comfort in the routine and familiarity. 

Today Sasha is telling her friend about the depths of boredom that can only be experienced in the throes of AP Chemistry. When the brunette brings up her habit of snoozing in class, Mikasa begins to wonder if anyone in her generation is capable of getting any sleep. 

Then suddenly, Sasha passes a ball with a little too much force and Mikasa ends up kicking it high into the air, something she was very much not intending to do. As it goes flying she can already tell that it’s going off the intended trajectory.

Unsurprisingly, the team’s star striker causes the ball to soar with breathtaking speed. Mikasa and Sasha watch as it heads towards the running track surrounding the sports field. 

The ball gets dangerously close to hitting some poor unsuspecting person trying to get a few laps in. It lands just in front of a guy in a green hoodie, causing him to curse and stumble back. 

While Mikasa feels horrible for the deed, Sasha lets out a laugh and clutches her stomach as she guffaws.

“Whoa! Looks like it’s raining balls, Jean Boy!” Sasha exclaims in utter glee. 

After sharply elbowing her friend to quiet down, Mikasa gets a better look at the person on the track. It’s the guy in her study hall who brings his lacrosse stick to class at least three days a week. 

“Sorry about that!” Mikasa calls out to him. 

When their gazes meet, Mikasa immediately notices a sense of nervousness taking over Jean’s disposition. At first he seems annoyed with Sasha, which is unsurprising for most people who know her, but the second Jean looks at Mikasa his face softens and he begins to look sick. 

“Uh… it’s fine…” he stammers out. Awkwardly, he grabs the ball that almost struck him head on and kicks it back to the field. 

She’s noticed him acting like this in class once or twice before, sometimes being surprisingly quiet and reserved out of the blue. He usually chats with his seat mates during the hour — to what extent Mikasa doesn’t know, but it’s a lot more than her. Seeing him huddle to himself does feel a tad bit peculiar, but perhaps she’s reading too far into things. 

When the ball returns to the field, Mikasa runs to grab it off the ground, then says — “Thank you.” 

Jean manages a smile despite his unease and gives a friendly wave. 

“You’re welcome!” 

…

…

…

A week and a whole lacrosse game later, Jean returns home with his mother and does not hesitate to let himself rest. After tossing his dirty uniform in the laundry hamper, he takes a quick shower to rid himself of the dirt and grass on his skin. At least tanking that body check was worth it, since protecting Connie Springer ensured the team’s winning goal. 

Once he’s clean, Jean heads back to his room and lies on his bed. He’s exhausted from the game, but before nodding off he manages to read a handful of texts sent to him while he was busy. His teammate Thomas is congratulating him for providing the game-winning assist, Connie applauding him for surviving a body check from the absolute unit of a defender on the opposing team, and the final is a message from Sasha regarding something completely unrelated to the whole-ass lacrosse game she just watched him in. 

‘Oh Sasha, never change for anyone,’ is the last thought on Jean’s mind before he truly falls asleep.

As per usual, Jean heads to school the next morning. Except instead of heading straight to art class to dick around until the bell, he’s making a stop at his locker to pick up the fabled chemistry notes that Sasha so kindly begged for. 

Despite his somewhat messy penmanship and the single staple haphazardly holding the papers together, at least the notes are thorough. 

As Jean traverses the crowded hallways, he wonders when Sasha will actually start staying awake during class instead of mooching off him to pass. One should expect more from a senior on the verge of graduation, but one should also expect that the inner mechanisms of Sasha’s mind must remain an enigma. 

As Jean walks, another text tells him to head to the soccer field to make the transfer. Due to the abundance of emojis following the message, he does what he’s told.  

After he exits the schools’ north building, the warmth of the sun grazes his skin. As he traverses the student parking lot, he’s suddenly thankful for a reason to be outdoors. 

When Jean arrives at the field he walks on the path between the bleachers and the running track. After scanning the area for Sasha, he looks forward and suddenly realizes that he’s in proximity of the last — or perhaps the first — person he wants to see. 

…

…

…

As a handful of her teammates scrimmage on the field, Mikasa remains at the side to warm up. With a few dynamic stretches she can feel the blood flowing in her veins and her muscles beginning to activate. Morning practices are not her favorite, but it’s a good distraction from her usual post-winter blues. 

Once she finishes her final stretch and gets onto her feet, she glances up to see a person she doesn’t often see at this time of day. 

Jean’s hair is scruffy as he walks near the bottom of the bleachers. His disposition is uneasy, just as it has been before, but he manages to approach her with a boyish smile on his face — the kind that is subdued, shy, but ultimately genuine. 

“Hey, Mikasa.”

She tilts her head to the side and furrows her eyebrows at him. “How do you know my name?”

“We’ve gone to school together for the last four years,” he explains, his tone turning dry. “And we have study hall. And weren’t you in my bio class last term?”

Mikasa tries to think back to where or when she would have seen his face. At this point in her high school career, everything becomes a blur the second she’s finished with it. Only a select few things have managed to linger with her.  

But nonetheless, she nods her head slowly and pretends to know what she’s talking about. “I think so.”

There is a beat, and Mikasa can’t help but notice that Jean’s nervousness returns. His resting face often looks mean and sullen, yet somehow — standing in front of her — Jean has suddenly adopted the mannerisms of Panko in a veterinarian’s waiting room.  

He runs a hand through his hair and avoids her gaze. “Uh… have you seen Sasha?”

Mikasa gently tilts her head towards the field. Jean looks over just in time to see Sasha doing passing drills with Historia near the net. 

“Coach threw her in at the last minute,” Mikasa adds. 

Jean clicks his tongue. “Ah.” 

As Mikasa reaches down to adjust her shin guards, Jean slips off his backpack and rummages inside. What he takes out is a handful of papers with various paragraphs and chemistry equations scribbled onto them. 

For a guy who worked somewhat diligently in every study hall, Mikasa has never noticed how messy his notes could be. 

“Could you uh… do me a favor and give these to her?” Jean asks as he hands over the papers. “Sasha seems a little…” 

He pauses, then looks to the field just in time to see the girl in question tripping over the ball. 

“...preoccupied.”

Just like before, Mikasa nods slowly and takes the papers. As sleep-deprived and tired as she tends to be, she’s not too unkind to refute a simple request. 

“I can do that.”

Jean gives her a slight grin as he slips his backpack on. “Uh… good game last week, by the way.” 

Mikasa raises an eyebrow. “You attend the girl’s soccer games?”

Jean nods like it’s the easiest thing in the world. 

“Yeah, for Sasha mainly, but you’re all good,” he lauds. His smile towards her gets just a bit brighter. “You’re a better midfielder than most dudes on the lacrosse team, that’s for sure.” 

Mikasa lets out a hum, which is the closest she can get to laughing. She finds something humorous in Jean’s ability to applaud her while simultaneously shit-talking the guys he plays alongside. She’s tempted to start attending the boys lacrosse games just to double check his claims.  

“I suppose that’s a compliment?” she asks, her tone getting just a bit softer. 

Jean gives her a nod. “It is.” 

For a brief second, Mikasa glances down to her cleats. They’re muddier than she thought they were. 

“I’m not good at taking those,” she says in a voice that’s more like a whisper. 

When she looks up again there’s a sense of sincerity in Jean’s eyes. She’s only realized now that they’re hazel. The hue goes well with the ashy brown tones of his hair. 

“Then you better learn,” Jean tells her, and his voice becomes warm and gentle. 

Mikasa’s grasp around the papers tightens as a rush of warmth surges to her face, but she doesn’t know why. 

Jean’s smile persists, and when he voids her gaze again he seems to be having a short, private moment to himself. Mikasa can practically see the gears turning in his head, but she can’t quite pinpoint what he’s thinking about. 

When he looks at her once, he manages a polite nod. 

“See you at study hall, Mikasa,” Jean says, and the way her name rolls off his lips feels so effortless. 

Jean turns around and walks away from the field. For a few moments, Mikasa remains where she is and watches him leave until he is a speck between the bleachers and the running track.

Once he’s gone, she folds the notes in her hands and walks to her backpack at the bottom of the bleachers. She has no choice but to stash them somewhere until Sasha’s done rolling in the mud. As she sits down to put the papers away, her eyes glance upon the scribble-like penmanship on the pages. 

Her heart skips a beat when she recognizes the handwriting. 

[ansatsu-sha]

Lady Kiyomi + Annie / Shingeki no Kyojin S4E29  

[binibchielq]

Lady Kiyomi Azumabito, Finding Yourself

Chapter 2

I want to thank my best friend, @xbracedmonsterx ,

For motivating me and helping me gather my messy ideas and puzzling them together to form the second chapter.

This is a @xbracedmonsterx appreciation post.

He had always been the real G. Tops. Always willing to listen to whatever new idea and fixating with them with me as if he had also had an interest in it for a long time as I. He always understood, supported me in all my little passion projects, and is my greatest friend.

Without him and his support, I don't think I would've been the same person as I am.

Here's a link to Chapter Two: