#baker's end

[doctornolonger]

The Killer Cats of Gin-Seng

In Survival, the last regular serial of Classic Doctor Who, the Doctor and Ace visit a planet of humanoid cats called “Cheetah People”. The Cheetah People are highly telepathic: they can mentally control and inhabit their pet cats, and they can even teleport between planets. Most notably, one of them is played by Lisa Barrowman, better known as Bernice Summerfield.

But this wasn’t actually the first time that humanoid cats had been set to appear in Doctor Who. In 1977, script editor Anthony Read commissioned his former collaborator David Weir to write the Season 15 finale, a four-part serial set on Gallifrey. The request was to explore society outside the Capitol with an emphasis on morality, a theme which Weir had written well in the past. So he pitched a story about Gallifreyan civilization of humanoid cats.

The Gallifreyan cat-people would have mirrored real-world cats’ dual penchant for both sophistication and savagery: they would appear advanced and civilized until the Doctor wound up in one of their elaborate gladiatorial displays! Weir delivered his scripts on time, and production proceeded to the point that Dee Robson designed costumes for the cat actors.

Ultimately the story was cancelled: Weir, by all accounts an excellent screenwriter, dramatically overestimated the show’s VFX capabilities and budget. But executive producer Graham Williams later mentioned the idea at a fan convention, so it became well-known in fandom (albeit under the false name The Killer Cats of Geng Singh). As a result, when Survival finally brought cat people to screens, fans naturally canonwelded the two.

One of these fans was Adrian Middleton, editor of the Apocrypha fanzine. Here’s how Apocrypha issue 1 covered the cats:

Apocrypha on the Killer Cats

THE GIANT CATS     -16,000,000

The first intelligent mammalians on Gallifrey evolved from its version of the sabre-toothed Tiger. These giant cats developed a rudimentary form of empathic communication, which allowed them to influence the actions of their prey.

Over an extended period of time, the cats developed a finer telepathic ability, allowing them to actually control other species. This became a necessity as feline culture grew, as their physiological form prevented the use of tools to build or write with. Thus, in spite of their intelligence, the cats could not establish a true civilisation without anthropoid assistance.

FELINOID CIVILISATION     -14,000,000

Early Gallifreyan hominids soon became the tools of feline culture. The first buildings on the planet were built by hominids but designed by cats, taking the form of vast stone arenas, in which the cats would use lesser species for sport - hunting and killing for pleasure rather than survival.

HOMINIDS     -14,000,000/-13,980,000

Forced to live alongside saurian and feline predators, Gallifrey's first hominid tribes evolved as creatures of guile and stealth. Communities were established using primitive communications. These hominids were the cave-people, the tree-people, and the river-people.

THE FALL OF THE GIANT CATS     -13,980,000

The hominid tribes had at first been easy prey for the cats, easily manipulated as a supply of muscle and food. Ultimately, however, the development of feline culture accelerated the development of hominid culture. Being made to use their hands and having the telepathic parts of their minds manipulated awakened a new sense of purpose within them. Seeing the cats as their slavers, they rebelled, exposing the cats to a coup so bloody that the species was all but wiped from the face of the planet.

THE LEGEND OF THE VANISHING CATS     -13,800,000

It is rumoured that, after their defeat by the hominids, the giant cats fled to the mountains, where they hoped to restore their numbers (perhaps in an effort to restore their power over the hominids). Often hunting parties would venture into these mountains, bringing back the occasional cat. It seemed that the mental strength of the hominids had come to match their feline contemporaries.

Other psychic powers were attributed to the cats, including the power of teleportation. In Gallifrey's southern hemisphere, atop one of its highest mountains, there stands a crudely erected stone circle. Gallifreyan archaeologists determined that this was built by the cats themselves. Legend states that the giant cats emigrated by mass teleportation to another worlds. Few giant cats were seen from this time on, and those that did appear bore no telepathic powers. However, smaller domestic cats, or Kitlings, retained this ability.

WHY LINK THE KITLINGS FROM 'SURVIVAL' WITH THE KILLER CATS OF GALLIFREY?

The 'cat' theme is one that has been expanded on greatly in recent years. Colin Baker's cat motif and 'I am the cat that walks alone' slogan, followed by Eric Saward's novelisation of 'Slipback', set a pace followed by 'Survival' and the 'Cat's Cradle' trilogy.

Upon learning about 'The Killer Cats of Ginseng' by David Weir, everything seemed to fit into place. Cats can't exist everywhere in the universe, they have to come from somewhere - we have Earth cats, and Gallifrey has telepathic or empathic cats, just like the Kitlings.

Commentary

Since the 90s, a few stories have referenced the killer cats idea. Gary Russell’s VMA Invasion of the Cat-People mentions “mercenaries of Gin-Seng” alongside the Cheetah People in a list of felinoid species (hence the “canonical” spelling); there’s a similar offhand mention in Big Finish’s Erasure. But there’s only been one actual appearance of one of the cats: Daniel O’Mahony’s Faction Paradox short story “The Return of the King” (pdf).

“The Return of the King” is a prelude to the author’s 2008 novel Newtons Sleep. In that book there’s a glimpse of “the nocturnal delegations of the wild things, whose sharp bright teeth and claws gleamed in the dark of their robes.” The prelude elaborates,

[Time Lord Thessalia’s] oracle stays at the window, seething playfully below his hood. He has fiercely intelligent eyes, neither as sharp nor as bright as his scar. His mouth is a succulent white smile in a lightless face. His people have nothing but contempt for the rituals of the Great Houses. She’s little better than prey to him, a bloodless snack for his long teeth and hungry mind. He breathes, honeyed air purring out of the cavities of his body.

A killer cat kept as a Time Lord’s personal oracle … as @rassilon-imprimatur​ once noted, a funny recontextualization of The Mark of the Rani’s reference to the Lord President’s “pet cat”!

This was my first exposure to the killer cats, so I always took it for granted that they’d always had psychic or oracular abilities. But in fact, as best as I can tell, there was zero hint of this in the original serial. I tracked down every published description of the story, and they all amount to the same few repeated bits of information: Gallifrey, humanoid cats, and a gladiatorial arena. Richard Bignell ultimately told me, “No summary of Killers of the Dark exists. Even David Weir couldn’t recall anything about it when I spoke to him.”

So when “The Return of the King” features an oracular cat-man, it’s not just a reference to the unmade Classic serial. It’s a reference to fan interpretations like Middleton’s which canonweld that serial with the psychic Cheetah People.

And in some ways, it seems to be referencing Middleton’s version specifically! In “The Return of the King”, the above quoted memory is interrupted by commentary:

Your first oracle? ‘My last.’ You think? But his kind were vanishing from the world. ‘They were escaping the War. They could see it coming.’

Compare:

Legend states that the giant cats emigrated by mass teleportation to another worlds. Few giant cats were seen from this time on, and those that did appear bore no telepathic powers.

And so Middleton explains how the cats vanished in O’Mahony’s telling, and O’Mahony explains why they vanished.

Afterword

While we’re on the topic of why, why did O’Mahony choose to revive this specific idea in “The Return of the King”?

One of the places I checked for Killers of the Dark details was issue 336 of Doctor Who Magazine. Imagine how thrilled I was to find that the relevant “Accidental Tourist” piece, located one page after a Faction Paradox ad, was written by none other than O’Mahony himself!

Part of his reflection was particularly striking. He recaps the wild undefinedness of the Doctor’s backstory, a topic I’ve discussed before on this blog. But in his telling, the uncertainty extends past The War Games all the way to The Deadly Assassin.

After all, The War Games declared that “the Doctor’s people are the Time Lords”, but “who are the Time Lords?” was still left undefined. In the Time Lords’ many subsequent appearances, they were simply walking plot devices, and lore details were left to the wayside. Contradictions were rife. Who was Rassilon to Omega? Is their planet called “Gallifrey” or “Jewel”? Who or what on earth are the “First”, “Second”, and “Third Time Lord” who exiled the Doctor?

It was The Deadly Assassin which first dove into the details by featuring the Time Lords like they were any other of the show’s alien cultures. And for this, it was widely panned: “the fans had voted it the worst story of Season Fourteen and published reviews vociferously attacking its ‘betrayal’ of the Time Lords. The BBC practically disowned it, physically vandalising the master tape to placate Mary Whitehouse.” In other words, the stage was all set for a discarding of Holmes’ Time Lords.

O’Mahony writes in his conclusion,

The Deadly Assassin could have remained a one-off, its vision of the Doctor’s homeworld set at odds not just with the Gallifrey stories of the past but also those of the future. The Killer Cats of Geng Singh was the last chance to slip the leash. Williams loved the Time Lords but he had a raft of other ideas he could have put into play, not least the frustratingly deferred Guardians who were clearly intended as a new rung of the series cosmology above and beyond the Time Lords. The premise of Killer Cats was also to counterpoint the Time Lords with another Gallifreyan species – a race of humanoid cats that delighted in bloodthirsty gladiatorial contests alongside a highly refined culture. This wasn’t cribbing from The Deadly Assassin, this was building something new that would expand the newly-forged mythology of the series. In fact, with the cat-people on board and the Guardians waiting in the wings, the possibilities for Time Lord mythology were fluid. It might be possible to return to Gallifrey and find something new and exciting each time, different Gallifreys, with a mutable and ever-expanding history.

However, thanks to Killers of the Dark’s cancellation, Williams and Read were left with a slot to fill on short notice, and for The Invasion of Time they ultimately turned back to Holmes’ ideas. The Deadly Assassin wasn’t discarded or undermined, it was reentrenched.

This was the real moment that the Time Lords as we know them were crystallized: a real-world anchoring of the thread. This was when the whimsically-named planet “Gallifrey” definitively transformed into the rationalistic, stagnant, bureaucratic Homeworld that would feature in the Faction Paradox series.

Because in FP, by the time Grandfather Paradox enters the scene, the Great Houses are total strangers to whismy. It’s only through the course of the War that their understanding of the cosmos is broadened and stranger things begin to return to the Homeworld (with great vengeance).

By showing us a cat in the flesh, O’Mahony is finishing the housekeeping: just as the Intuitive Revelation banished the Pythia, the Eremites, and the Carnival Queen; just as the Grey Eminence unwrote Gallifrey’s first childbirth; and just as the Eternals “despaired of this reality, and fled their hallowed halls” at first hint of conflict – the Killer Cats have to leave to set the scene for the War to come.

P.S.

In Baker’s End, Tom Baker wound up “the King of Cats”. What does this imply about the Other?!?

[pluralzalpha]

Every version of the Doctor - 229

Tom Baker as the Master of Baker's End/The King of Cats

Back in 2009, Tom Baker returned to the role of the Doctor for the first time in years, for the audio series Hornet's Nest, written by Paul Magrs. This was the first of three series known as the Nest Cottage Chronicles, where the Doctor was living semi-retired in the eponymous cottage in Sussex.

Later, Magrs and Baker continued the story with Baker's End for Bafflegab Productions, changing the name of the cottage and characters and making the Doctor into a version of Tom Baker himself.

So who was he really? Officially the Nest Cottage Chronicles feature the Fourth Doctor, but he is written as transcending continuity and often sounds to be older. Perhaps this is a version of the Fourth Doctor who never regenerated. Or perhaps he's the Curator. Or perhaps Tom Baker was the Doctor all along...

[taonpest]

Sometimes being an artist is feeling like a baker seeing a chemist making the deadliest liquid in the world and wishing you could make the deadliest liquid as well but you're a baker, not a chemist, and then you feel like your bread is worthless

[phoenixtakaramono]

God, William “Billy” Butcher knowing his way around the kitchen is hot and attractive af, and baking cookies for Ryan is cute sh*te. Good job, The Boys (TV) for this visual treat

The Boys S04E03

[jbsrainbowstrap]

I love how JB grapples the boys when they hug her.

[eddievedders]

Mom, what’s wrong? Why are you here? I mean, if you got something you need to say to me, I'd appreciate it if you just went ahead and said it.

[speargpants]

A little drawing to celebrate the Mystery Room manga. I usually check the new updates on friday when they release, but of course i forget to check when it's the final update. hopefully im not too late lol

[b0ydyke]

jesus at the gay bar by jay hulme // julien baker via @\coreysabs on ig // jesus christ by brand new // solar power by lorde // boygenius via @\isabellasofia on ig // a knock on the door by james tate

[evilvvithin]

END OF ZOE resident evil 7 biohazard

[astrangetorpedo]

giving myself ambiguous disorders watching this video on loop

[emergingghost]

boygenius members' albums as moths! because! <3

[pluralzalpha]

Every version of the Doctor - 230

Colin Baker as the Master of Baker's End

One further mystery: in the fourth and final release of Baker's End, Tom Baker died and returned as Colin Baker. The Curator was also played by both Tom and Colin Baker...

[kasterarts]

"Hey Sara... would you help me make Sou a cake for his birthday?"

(spoilers below)

[honeys-hotties]

I Don't Deserve You-Julien Baker x Reader

my first julien baker fic, because the jb brainrot is SO REAL i love her with my whole heart

jb x fem!reader

angst but happy ending (have i ever written anything without angst??) anyways! as always, this is all made up!! jb is a little mean in this one, and in real life i am so sure she would never act like this

word cout: 2222 &lt;3

After a horrifically unproductive day at the studio, all Julien wants to do when she gets back to her house is sleep for approximately 17 hours. The clock on the wall reads 6:13 when she drops her jacket on the couch, completely forgetting about the dirty breakfast dishes she had promised you she would clean up that morning. You had an obnoxiously early start that morning, but wanting to see you before you left for work, Julien had woken up and you two had made breakfast together.

“I’m so sorry I don’t have time to clean everything up,” you had whispered apologetically, perched atop the counter while Julien stood between your legs. “If you could put everything away before you go to the studio for me please baby? And I can make us dinner tonight? I shouldn’t be too late? I think they were saying 7:00 wrap tonight? So I’ll be home by 7:45 at the latest.” Julien had agreed, if mostly to quiet her excited girlfriend so she could get a few kisses in before you left, but had gone back upstairs and fallen asleep after you were gone. She had slept through her alarm, and in her panic to get to the studio on time had forgotten to clean the kitchen.

Julien walked up the stairs, pushing the door to their bedroom open and falling face-first onto the large, unmade bed, and immediately passing out. She sleeps peacefully for about an hour and a half, until the slamming of the front door startles her awake. Rubbing her eyes irritatedly, Julien sits up in the darkened bedroom, a headache growing behind her eyes. 

“Babe?” She hears you call from downstairs. “Where are you?” Grumbling to herself, Julien sits up and stretches, her back popping from the movements. You pad up the stairs, and poke your head into the bedroom, smiling at the sight of your tired girlfriend. “Good nap?” you ask softly, walking towards the bed and sitting down next to Julien, who wraps her arms around her girlfriend’s waist, resting her head in your lap.

“Yeah, baby.” Julien hums. “Really good nap.”

You laugh softly, stroking Julien’s hair in your lap. “I’m glad, babe. You’ve been working yourself to death recently. How was the studio today?”

Julien rolls her eyes, sitting up abruptly. “I really don’t want to talk about work right now.” She says, irritated. Your eyes widen slightly, shocked by your girlfriend’s sharp tone, but ultimately chalking it up to her exhaustion. “Oh, okay. I’m sorry, Jules. I can go start dinner, if you want to nap a little longer?”

Julien looks at you guiltily. “I’m sorry, princess.” She pulls you into her lap, kissing your forehead repeatedly. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap at you. I love you.” You laugh quietly, relishing in the comfort of Julien’s arms, the kisses being pressed to your face. 

“It’s okay baby. I get it. Want to come start on dinner with me?” 

Julien nods, and follows like a puppy after you, down the stairs and into the kitchen. Julien is so lost in thought that when you stop abruptly in front of her at the sight of the kitchen, Julien smacks directly into you, knocking you forward a couple of steps. 

“Whoa princess, what’re you doin’?” She asks, reaching out to steady you. You swat her hands away, turning to face Julien with an unamused expression on your face. “Hey,” Julien takes a step back. “I’m sorry baby, I didn’t mean to bump into you, I swear, I just wasn’t expecting you to stop there…” she trails off at the look on your face. “What?”

“The kitchen, JB.” You say, gesturing to the dirty dishes behind you. “You promised you would clean up this morning, remember? I specifically asked if you could take care of it this morning so it wouldn’t be a problem tonight, and you told me not to worry, that you would clean up before you left.”

Julien rolls her eyes, her girlfriend’s irritation only adding to her bad mood. “Seriously, babe? You barely see me all day, and now you’re getting mad because I didn’t do the dishes? So I wanted to get some extra sleep this morning? Don’t you think I fuckin’ deserve it? I work so damn hard, I deserve a break, and having you flipping out on me isn’t helpful, baby.” Her tone is biting, her words harsh, and she barely notices the tears glazing over her girlfriend’s eyes. 

“I work hard too, Julien!” You grit out. “Just because I’m not some incredible singer doesn’t mean I don’t work hard, doesn’t mean I’m not exhausted when I get home. You told me you would clean up and you didn’t, I don’t understand why you’re getting so defensive-”

“Exactly!” Julien yells. “You don’t understand. You have no idea what it’s like to have this pressure on your shoulders every goddamn second, the eyes of so many people, waiting for you to fuck up. But guess fucking what, princess? The world doesn’t revolve around you.” She stalks closer to you, her voice loud. “You have no idea what I’m dealing with, how exhausted I am constantly, how hard I’m working. So I forgot to do the dishes once? So what? Look at everything I do for you, everything I bring to the table, versus you, and then try to tell me off again, princess.” As soon as the words leave her mouth, Julien wishes she could take them back. You look like you’ve been slapped across the face, and the unshed tears in your eyes finally begin to fall. You let out a choked sob, backing away from Julien who, in her anger, had cornered you against the table. 

“Wait, baby…I didn’t…” but it’s too late. The damage is done. 

“You’re right, Julien,” You manage. “I don’t know what it’s like. Maybe you should find someone who understands you, because obviously I never could.”

“No, princess, please-” Julien starts, before you cut her off.

“Don’t fucking call me that.” You snap. “I’m not your ‘princess’, I’m not your ‘baby’, I’m not your ‘doll’, I’m not anything to you, apparently.”

“No, please. You’re everything to me, I swear, I was just being mean because I’m tired, please, I didn’t mean it” Julien’s eyes fill with tears. You turn away from her. “I think you should leave, Julien. Before you say something else you ‘don’t mean’”. 

“No, please, you know I can’t leave when we’re fighting, we have to fix things, please let me fix things.”

You turn to her, tears streaming down your face. “I don’t know if you can fix this, Julien. I’ve put up with a lot of your shit, when you snap at me because you’ve had long days at the studio and I let it slide, when you chainsmoke because you’re stressed and I hold my tongue because I don’t want to make you more upset, when you make my problems feel small because I’m not part of some huge band. I don’t know if I can do this anymore. It’s not fair to me.”

Julien drops to her knees in front of you, reaching gently for your hands. “Please let me fix this” she cries softly. “Please, my love. I will do anything to make it up to you. Anything.” You pull your hands from Julien’s grasp. 

“I’m going to bed” you say, brokenly. “Just, wash the dishes, please.” 

“I love you” Julien calls out after you, watching you retreat up the stairs. “Baby, I-I love you.” You say nothing, and as soon as you disappear up the stairs, Julien breaks down in tears. She sits on the kitchen floor and cries, cries because she thinks she might have just ruined the best thing in her life. Julien cries for what feels like either ten minutes or ten hours, until she has no tears left and her sobs turn into pathetic sniffles. Eventually, she stands up and finds her phone, calling the only two people she trusts to help her fix her relationship. Phoebe and Lucy both pick up almost immediately, and listen dutifully as Julien fills them in on the fight while she tries to tidy up the kitchen. 

“Wow” Phoebe manages when Julien finishes the story. “Julien, fuck, I don’t know what to say.”

“I do,” Lucy chimes in. “You fucked up. Big time. Like, I don’t even know how you fucked up this badly.”

“That’s really helpful, Luce.” Julien retorts. “Now, how do I fix things? She’s the best thing in my life, and I can’t do this without her.”

“I think you and her need to have a really serious conversation about your relationship and what she expects of you” Phoebe says seriously. “It sounds like you’ve been neglecting her, however unintentionally, taking her for granted. She’s put up with it for long enough, JB, and honestly, she deserves better. I love you and I’m here for you no matter what, but you’re in the wrong here, babe.”

“You guys will work it out, but just try to understand where she’s coming from. You’ve got a pretty short fuse when you’re stressed,” Lucy adds. “I know you both and I know how much love you have for each other. Just, talk things through with her, see it from her point of view.”

“Okay. I’ll try. And you’re right, she deserves better. I’ll do my best to try harder for her, to be more attentive and more patient for her. I love her so much.”

“We know,” Lucy says. “We love you both so much, and I know you two will work it out. It’s hard right now, but you’re going to come out on the other side of this so much stronger as a couple.”

“Tell her we say hi, and call us tomorrow with updates, okay JB. We love you.” Phoebe says, bringing a small smile to Julien’s face.

“I will. Thank you guys, I love you both so much.” Julien disconnects the call and wipes down the counter, before turning off the kitchen lights and heading upstairs. Her footsteps grow soft as she reaches the door to your shared bedroom, and she pushes the door open softly, her heart breaking at the sight of you curled up on the bed, eyes red and puffy. 

“I don’t want to talk right now, Julien.” You say quietly, your voice raspy. 

“Will you listen then, baby? Just, I have a few things I want to say to you, to apologize for, and then you can kick me out, okay?” Julien asks hopefully, walking slowly towards the bed. You sit up wordlessly, gesturing for Julien to go ahead.

“Um, okay. Here goes. Baby, I’m so, so fucking sorry. I don’t know what came over me. I’ve been so tired and stressed lately. And I know that’s not an excuse. I just want to tell you where I’m coming from. That gives me zero right to take it out on you, though. And I’m so sorry because through everything, you’ve been here for me. You’ve stuck with me, through good and bad, no matter what. And I’ve been taking you for granted, which is so unfair to you, and you deserve so much better than me. You deserve someone who listens to you and values your opinions, someone who loves you so much they can’t stand the thought of life without you. Someone who knows how hard you work, someone who is always there for you, someone who is patient and protective and treats you like a queen. I want to be that person for you, if you’ll let me. I want to show you how incredible you are and tell you every day for the rest of our lives how much I adore you. I can’t imagine my life without you. I don’t want to imagine my life without you. I know I don’t deserve you, but please, give me another chance. You make my life worth living, you make everything better. I love you more than I can ever say, but if you want me, I will spend the rest of our lives proving how much I love you.” By the end of her speech, you're sobbing. 

“Oh, fuck, baby, doll, I’m so sorry, I-”

“Shut up and kiss me” You cut her off, and Julien’s eyes widen at your statement. “I, what?”

“You heard me,” you laughed, your throat still choked with tears. “Kiss me, Julien.” Without hesitating, Julien surges forward and connects your lips in a searing kiss. She can taste the salt of your tears mixing with her own, and when she finally breaks away, she rests her forehead against yours, gently wiping your tears away.  “I love you” she whispers. “And I don’t deserve you. But I love you so much. And I’m sorry.”

“I know you are,” you say. “But I don’t want to talk about that right now. I’m tired. Let’s go to sleep, we can talk more in the morning.”

Julien presses her lips to yours once more. “You’re the boss, princess. I’ll start making it up to you first thing tomorrow.”

“You better.” You say, letting out a watery chuckle, cuddling into her. “And I have a few ideas for how you can start.”

honey's notes: to anyone reading this right now, i love you you're amazing, all the forehead kisses in the world for you! this fic was so fun to write, lmk if i should write more for jb or the boys!

love always, honey

[sauntering-vaguely-downwardss]

Posting my les mis cosplays pt 1 : Baker boy!! :D

[yourfavebooklrsfavebooklr]

some books with nonbinary major characters to read for international nonbinary people’s day!

Tell me how it ends - nonbinary major character. Fantasy. Reworking of Tangled, main character leaves her home (and abusive family) to try and use tarot magic to help save someone’s friend in a heist.

Running close to the wind - nonbinary love interest. Comedic fantasy where the main character accidentally commits treason and runs away on a pirate ship.

Baker Thief - genderfluid main character. Fantasy where magic-users are being used as batteries and the main character has to stop that and save her sibling.

The heart-break bakery - agender main character. YA magical realism. After a breakup, the main character accidentally makes brownies that cause future breakups and has to try and get the couples back together.

Dear wendy - main character questioning their gender. NA contemporary where the two main characters end up in a social media feud while becoming friends IRL

All systems red - agender main character. Sci-fi about a robot who broke free of its controlling module and has to keep humans safe.

The honeys - genderfluid main character. YA horror where the main character goes to a camp to investigate his sister’s death and finds that things are weirder than he’d thought.