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digital-style666 · 2 years ago

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My the amazing Digital Circus Oc

Names : Figaro

Age: 17 years old

Height: 5'4 inches tall

Voice claim: Shaggy from the 2002 movie

Voice details: a very raspy Shaggy like voice but with a lisp

Mental Disorders:

auDHD and BPD

Pronouns:

He/Him /xem /xyrt/heirs

Gender/s:

Male (closeted Transmasc boy )

Sexuality/ies:

Bisexual

Body:

Lego man

Coping mechanism:

Partying and self harm (self destructive behavior & drug and alcohol abuse)

Appearance/s :

Dark yellow skin, two bandaids together in a × over his nose, Dark orange hair with a white light green (backwards) and dark green hat with hot pink words in the front that says "Parties 4 life" , scrawny, he wears a dark green and neon green varsity jack with a black and dark green #11 Tshirt underneath, baige khakis , and white shoes

What their appearance symbolizes:

Him being a Lego could be implied they always end up with the wrong people as friends in their past life and because of it they were always peer pressured into doing things and was always used in the form of entertainment

Personality/ies :

Figaro is a walking breathing and speaking 17 year old Lego that's basically a ex college frat boy and something of a hippy due to his generally laid back persona, his hair, clothes, and his inappropriate use of slipping in the word "Like" in his speech. Even though throughout the years, he's tried to be the average teen, he's still stuck being labelled as a hippy.

Figaro is a care free, easily distracted, dimwitted , gullible, friendly boisterous, and foolish attitude

and has a variety of interests and hobbies, with his most well-known being food , partying , music but mostly house music and electric music, smoking weed, and doing foolish stunts and dares Though he has no training he does show skills in djing and writing music. He also tends to be easily manipulated and peer pressured but later on starts to learn to take his own path and make his own choices!!

Likes:

Tons and tons of parties , Food , beer , weed , hot wings, Hawaiian pizza , Khao Niao Mamuang (Mango Sticky Rice) -favorite food, chili cheese nachos (with wasabi)-favorite food, mint chocolate chip ice cream -favorite food, pistachio ice cream -favorite food , chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream -favorite food, chocolate chip cookies -favorite food, sub sandwiches , and leopards

Dislikes:

Condescending people, long silences , being screamed at, touch (especially non consensual) , being talked down on, avocados, spinach, room temp beverages, fun polices, authority, waiting, long lines, lectures , boats (proned to sea sickness) , and tight spaces (they have claustrophobia)

Hobbies:

Partying, getting extremely high, listening to music, and skateboarding

Relationships:

Caine -

Neutral

Bubbles -

Neutral

Jax -

Absolutely fucking hates Jax, the two deliberately gets on each other's nerves and Jax tends to get under their skin

Ragatha -

He enjoys her presence and company, she's too nice for him to hate and despite how much her kind and caring nature towards them confuses them, he finds her as a nice woman

Gangle -

Neutral

Kinger-

Kinger and Figaro is completely fine with each other and while Figaro sees Kinger as a strange and off putting but also I kind grampa figure, Kinger will do anything in his power to make sure Figaro and Randy's safe and mentally well so that none of them abstracts and becomes just like him

Pomni -

Neutral

Zooble-

The two have a fun aunt and nephew like relationship

Kauphmo -

Unbeknownst to Figaro they barely know much about Kauphmo and what he's like thanks to the amount of interactions the two had (little to no interactions) and they weren't that close but he showed sympathy to knowing that Kauphmo abstracted

Darci (OC) -

Darci and tolerated each other and is even very neutral with each other's presence, they're fine with each other but their interactions aren't as frequent as Randy and Kinger

Randy (OC) -

Randy and Figaro started off as friends, to best friends, to crushes, and to boys friends in slow burn . The two gets a long well do to their somewhat similar behaviors and personalities and they hang out the most in the digital circus, Figaro being the head of the relationship (the one in charge)

How they ended up in Digital Circus:

Was dared to break in to C&A with their friends and steal the headset, was caught in the midst of stealing and out of panic he quickly placed it on

When they ended up in Digital Circus:

A few days after Gangle arrived in the digital circus

Backstory/ Background:

Very long ago waaaaaay before they arrived in the digital world, Figaro's real name was Orson Harris and he was a biracial Thai and black 17 year old college frat boy that had albinism. He had long unravelled orange hair that was in a mullet hairstyle, he had dark green eyes, really pale hazel skin , he was covered head to toe in freckles, he wore a aquamarine hoodie with a black and white number 5 long sleeve tshirt underneath, he wore dark blue denim jeans, a backwards blue cap, and dark green and white sneakers.

He used to live with his extremely emotionally, verbally, and psychologically abusive narcissist and alcoholic mother and his physically, mental, and ect. abusive father that extremely neglectful and always reaked off cigarettes until one day when Orson was outed for being transmasc and bisexual and kicked out of his own home for it.

Ever sense than Orson started to take care of and parent himself , steal food and clothes to survive, live in a hippy van he eventually began to call his own , by the time he hit 17 years old he

went to college for music and there he became frat boy and ended up gaining friends , but not necessarily the right friends but the type of friends that'll peer pressure you into doing terrible things , only ask you for something if they need something, will purposely use you as a scape goat, make fun of you behind your back, and will leave you behind if it meant getting their selves to safety .

One day after a big party Orson's frat besties had the bright idea to break into the C&A company building and steal the game headsets to play games on it , it caused a lot of convincing but they went through with it

the stealth mission went great at first until they were eventually caught , Orson's friends fled the scene and ended up leaving Orson and the stolen headsets behind in the process as Orson ended up getting chased and cornered by a security gaurd.

Out of panic Orson quickly puts the headset on and that's how he ended up in the digital circus.

_______________________________________________

Names : Pesto

Age: 34 years old

Height: 3 ft 6.5 in

Voice claim: Mammon from Helluva Boss

Voice details: scratchy ruff voice with a hint of a thick australian accent

Mental Disorders:

Autism Anxiety and PTSD

Pronouns:

He/Him

Gender/s:

Cis Male

Sexuality/ies:

Pansexual

Body: Stuffed bear

Coping mechanism:

Alcohol and drug abuse

Appearance/s :

A small 3 ft 6.5 in stuffed bear with pink floofy fur and salmon pink rosey cheeks, a backwards neon green bow, a hot pink unibrow , heterochromia button eyes (one turquoise and the other a dark purple), a pudgy body, and black toe beans

What their appearance symbolizes:

Childhood trauma

Personality/ies :

Pesto is a is the walking and talking textbook example of a complete and utter madlad. With a complete inability to give two shots (unless wanted), Chucky is a sadistic, short tempered, egotistical, temperamental and foul-mouthed individual. He also holds strong grudges against his foes and never forgets when someone has crossed him. He's ruff and tuff , brilliant , sassy, and murderous teddy bear with psychopathic and creepily criminal tendencies that makes him too dangerous to be amongst society.

They can also tend to be crude and can also tend to have extremely gross tendencies like digging in his ears or nose, scratching his butt, belching, and ect. ! His brilliance can be muddled by his jaded personal views and his alcoholic tendencies. Pesto is easily bored and does not do well with routine.

He is willing to be extremely brutal such as when people betray them or his life or those close to him are in danger. He is usually portrayed as homicidal and having a large disregard for life.

Pesto is a self-hating "husk" of his former self; He is secretly insecure in ways that are implied to relate to this, and desperately needs validation.

He has a flair for the dramatic and makes a show out of the majority of his actions

Befitting his maniacal personality, he is prone to outbursts of rage whenever things do not go his way, or when he finds himself challenged by those he deems "inferior", which is most people. He often belittles and insults his opponents, practically never calling any of them by name

Other than that they could also tend to have a tender and caring side, caring enough to lend a shoulder for the others to cry on in case they need it!!

Likes:

Sleeping, food , eating , alcohol , drugs, burritos , sweet potato fries, garlic knots, reading, crocheting, scrapbooking, reading, cooking and baking (extremely skilled with that), wood carving , trains (he has a shit load of different types of trainsets),and building a crow collection , alternative rock music, Hardcore punk music, synthwave , sounds of the rain , sounds of nature, and coffee

Dislikes:

Jax , Unsolicited advice and recommendation, Bragging, Tapping, Lack of boundaries in general, People who are one-uppers, Cutting lines, Slow walkers, Know-it-alls, Cracking knuckles, comments on his eating habits, and Passive-aggressiveness

Hobbies:

Sleeping, crocheting , scrapbooking, reading, cooking and baking (extremely skilled with that), wood carving , and building a crow collection

Relationships:

Caine -

Neutral towards Caine and also feels kinda intimidated by him

Bubbles -

Besties

Jax -

Absolutely hates him and because of it the two are always at each other's necks , Jax always has them fuming (brother kind of relationship , but it's more like brother rivalry)

Ragatha -

Besties

Gangle -

Besties

Kinger-

Besties (friend group between Kinger, Ragatha ,Bubble , and Gangle)

Pomni -

Neutral

Zooble-

Neutral

Kauphmo -

Was good friends with him, often hung out with him, talked and interacted with him a lot , and was a shoulder to lean on for him. He honestly didn't take his abstraction well

Darci (OC) -

Neutral

Randy (OC) -

Very close relationship with him and the two kinda have like a found family type of relationship and Randy reminds him of someone but thanks to his extremely blurry memory he just doesn't know who

How they ended up in Digital Circus:

Tried on a pair of headsets do to curiosity

When they ended up in Digital Circus:

He ended up in the circus Right after Ragatha

Backstory/ Background:

A long time ago before Pesto ended up in the world of the Digital Circus, he was once an African American young boy named Giovanni "Gio" Smith that had hazel eyes, he was a small petite black kid with long black floofy hair, he wore a black white and orange striped T-shirt, denim shorts, black leg warmers and orange sneakers

And he didn't have great parents at all and his mom was verbally emotionally physically and mentally abusive while his dad was psychologically physically emotionally and mentally abusive and was a huge alcoholic narcissist and ect. And because of it,

they had to endure all of that until they grew up and is now 34 years old (their current age) and what they look like now is that they're 6'1 feet tall and really chubby, they have a full hair of black wicks, he has a beard , he wears a hot pink white and salmon pink Hawaiian shirt with pineapples all over it, they wear square glasses, he wears black Capri cargo pants, and black and dark brown sandals

And ended up getting a wife named Paiton that's a mixed Black malaysian woman that's a hippy that's a actress,

a ftm transmasc and gay husband named Wren that's a Korean dorky and awkward train conductor,

and a nonbinary Hawaiian spouse named Jean that's a energetic chef along with two daughters and one son

named Aurora (the oldest) , Kuri (Middle), and Damien (the youngest).

One Day on one Christmas Eve night, someone broke in and killed Giovanni's entire family, no matter how much he tried to protect them , they were all still killed.

This sent Giovanni spiraling down a rabbit hole of alcohol and drugs and even murder and mostly people that deserved death, until one day he came across one of his kid's toys that was untouched for years and years

, curious he tries it on himself and BOOM

that's how Pesto came to be (ended up in the digital circus)!!!

_______________________________________________

Name : Darci

Age: 23 years old

Height: 5'9

Voice claim: Either Drye guy or Zeno Robinson

Voice details: He has a transylvanian accent

Mental Disorders:

Autism Anxiety and OCD

Pronouns:

They/Them/Their/They're

Gender/s:

Agender

Sexuality/ies:

Demiromantic

Omnisexual (mostly prefers men)

Body: Wooden puppet

Coping mechanism:

Overthinking

Appearances :

Darci is a cat puppet with a wood like appearance but their tail is plushy (soft material that full of cotton) , puppet mouth (you know the mouth with the lines underneath) , dark red tailed blazer with a black button up shirt underneath, their skin is a mix between blacks grey whites and dark browns but most dark brown (like a tabby calico cat) with dark rosey cheeks, Heterochromia (one eye is a dark brown and the other is a hot pink ), left right (brown eye) has a pupil shaped like a star and their right eye (that's hot pink) has a pupil shaped like a diamond, a light red beret with a yellow star in the front, they wear a dark grey dress vest over their black button up shirt, they wear black fingerless gloves , they wear dress pants where one side is red with black pockets and the other side is black with red pockets, they have a golden winding key on their back, and they wear velvet dress shoes

What their appearance symbolizes:

Loss of control and/or free will or having felt used at some point in life

Personality/ies :

Darci is a wooden puppet that's yet another member of the amazing Digital Circus and is known for being the sophisticated one of the group of performers. They tend to be very vain about their looks a knack /talent over performing in front of a audience, once claiming that they were made for applause and worship.

They also appear to be just as mentally unstable and deranged as the others but not enough to compare to Jax's fucked up mental state, often butting heads with Jax and has a frenemie like relationship with him!!

They're also known for being sophisticated, neat and tidy , dramatic, kind , flamboyant, elegant , formal, blunt , intelligent, nerdy , and artistic and has a thing for the arts and books do to being a book worm!!

Hobbies:

Reading , playing their cymbals, calligraphy, acting, crocheting, brewing, and geocaching

Loves:

Sweet potato fries (favorite food), garlic knots(favorite food), crab rangoons(favorite food), apple pie(favorite food), Aprikosenkuchen (favorite food), papanasi (favorite food) , fancy decor, the color red, tea, basically anything that's sweet, reading , playing their cymbals, calligraphy, acting, crocheting, brewing, and geocaching

Dislikes:

Jax , germs, unclean untidy and/or germy areas, loud chewing, slobby people, obnoxious or annoying people, long lines, slow walkers , being touched especially without consent, being woken up, oily surfaces or food, sweaters, physical touch, and puke

Relationships:

Caine -

Darci appears to have mixed and/or neutral feelings about Caine. On one hand it's hatred do him having caused them to be stuck in the digital circus stripped of their original identity, on the other hand it's fear, and on a third hand it's neutral

Bubbles -

Bubbles also terrifies them but not as much as Caine, they also feel neutral towards Bubble's presence

Jax -

Them and Jax has a frienemies like relationship, but mostly enemies do to Darci only seeing him as a complete rude immature and unpropper asshole

Ragatha -

Similar to Pomni Kauphmo and Gangle Darci sees Ragatha as a friend to the point that they appeared concern when Pomni ran to them and the others without her and simply asking "Are you alright, where's Ragatha?"

Gangle -

Darci sees Gangle as a best friend and is really kind to her and is often seen comforting her when her mask got broken twice and helping her up when Jax pushed her down

Kinger -

Neutral

Pomni -

When they first met her their first concern was that she was going to end up making them having to start the theme song all over again, which pretty much annoyed them and made them hate her. But as the pilot progresses they end up warming up to Pomni , becoming her best friend even

enough to share their personal opinion /experience about the exit door and it wasn't very good

Kauphmo -

Their relationship from the start seemed to be a slow burn relationship from strangers, to friends, to best friends , and to romantic partners and having been concerned for Kauphmo ever sense he started isolating himself, they volunteered to go with Ragatha, Jax , and Pomni to go check on him.

The three's attention seemed to be brought towards Kauphmo the moment they heard

Darci 's high pitch scream be heard from his room before he's heard saying in concern "K-Kauphmo , what happened to you?" .

The moment he realizes helping is futile they then are seen booking it out as they call out "SORRY!!"

By the end of it all , Darci seemed to be in a quiet and depressed state, staring down at their food whole picking at it

How they ended up in Digital Circus:

Tried on a pair of headsets do to curiosity

When they ended up in Digital Circus:

Ended up in the amazing Digital Circus months after Kinger

Backstory/ Background:

In their past life Darci (who's name used to be Audrey J. Dorsey) was a black transylvanian nonbinary guy from Romania , Transylvania that grew up a childhood star and high achiever until 23 years old where they still star in movies, shows, musicals/plays, and commercials as a movie star and there was it's ups and downs of having grew up in entertainment industry,

especially sense there were people out there that didn't actually care about them and only cared about the money, the entertainment they had to offer, and their beauty and there were even some people that only used them for their looks.

Not only that but they used to be in a extremely toxic relationship with a guy named Richie Banks and Richie never treated them right and was a narcissist and alcoholic that was verbally, emotionally, physically, psychologically, and mentally abusive towards Audrey.

One day, a fan gifted them a headset of an interesting game, intrigued they took it home and tried it

And of course that didn't end well.

Ending up in the amazing Digital Circus , slowly but gradually, Darci started losing memories of their identity, name, life, family, and ect.

Becoming the Darci you know today!!!!!

_______________________________________________

Name : Randy Flamingstone

Age: 16 years old

Height: 5'9

Voice claim:

He has a really thick New York accent

Mental Disorders:

ADHD Pyromania and Misophenia

Pronouns:

He/Him/His

Gender/s:

Male (he's transmasc)

Sexuality/ies:

Omnisexual

Body:

80s character Action figure

Coping mechanism:

Ignoring his situation (Denial) and bottling up his emotions

Appearances :

Hot pink hair that's in a pompadour hairstyle, wide grin and tooth gap, turquoise, light blue rosey cheeks , average height and pudgy , plastic skin/body, black fingerless gloves, white button up cargo jump suit with two red pockets on the chest , two orange pockets on both legs , and a #1 on the front, a red race helmet with an orange star on the front, and dark red dress shoes

A dark red purple and black race car with a big purple star on the front cap and his name is Buddy and he's a wacky, energetic, and feral wildcard that loves racing

What their appearance symbolizes:

Their appearance symbolizes how in his past life people has and always will see him as only the kid that has the mom that invented the Randy Flamingstone toys and the show itself

Personality/ies :

Randy Flamingstone is a plastic toy of a really famous cartoon character from an 80s children's show franchise. Randy Flamingstone is known for being as cool as Ice, calm , confident, determined, humorous, charming, and cunning

But Randy can also tend to be as dumb as a rock, he's a huge adrenaline junkie, competitive, pompous , obnoxious, stubborn , and also may have a few screws lose.

Other then that Randy tends to have a vocabulary that consist of bro, bruh, brah, Broski, dude, duddette , rad, radical, home skillet, gnarly, eat my shorts , homegirl/boy/buddy, and the list goes on.

He also has also has a sentient race car with eyes that conveys the emotions that Randy feels.

Randy Flamingstone was originally a 80s mainstream character in media like Barbie or SpongeBob SquarePants, but it's about a Afrolatino magical dare devil / racer that was known for doing crazy stunts and being the most talented famous 80s car racer in history

, originally they were his past live's mom's creation until they became Randy himself when he got a gaming headset for their birthday (The Amazing Digital Circus) !!!

He's has pyromania because before they ended up in the digital circus he ended up in a car accident that caused fire

Sense he has many toy copies of himself and because of it he has identity issues and is extremely insecure another few reasons he has identity issues is also because he's the digital counter part/ branded toy counter part of someone named Tobias Ryus Morales

And both has trauma related to only being known for their image, Randy only being known for being the famous "magical" race car driver with a talking race car friend named Buddy and Tobias only being known for the kid that's the child of cartoonist, Nova Jane Morales (the creator of the Randy Flamingstone cartoon and franchise)!!!!

Hobbies:

Thrill seeking and car racing

Loves:

Cars, thrill seeking, car racing, Being loved , praise , mirrors , checking himself out, dramatic entrances , crossdressing , gumballs , cheeseburgers (favorite food) , Jolt Cola - Cherry bomb (favorite beverage, also I searched up 80s energy drinks for that), energy drinks , racing, race cars, and danger

Dislikes:

Being ignored, wet socks, long lines, waiting , dogs (is terrified of dogs) , Lighting and thunder (has astraphobia, fear of lightning and thunder), slow drivers, slow walkers , gum smacking, People who overstay their welcome, having their personal space invaded, when people touch their race car, and nonconsensual physical touch

Relationships:

Caine -

Nothing much to think about him, all Randy sees is just an extremely intimidating ringmaster, Randy would usually stay on Caine's goodside

Bubbles -

He's completely fine with him and sees him as cool but there are some times he sees Bubbles as strange and disgusting, like when he started licking up Pomni's puke

Jax -

Just like what Jax does to everyone else he's also a complete dick to Randy Flamingstone too and because of it Jax makes him completely fucking heated to the point him and Jax but heads a lot

Ragatha -

Randy and Ragatha have a son and mother type of relationship with each other, to the point that Randy is actually really emotionally attached to her, her personality feels familiar to him but he can't think about who it reminds him of because of the memories he has lost

Gangle -

Neutral

Kinger -

Neutral????

Zooble-

Neutral

Pomni -

When she first arrived, his personality was still shown but he made sure not to be as over the top as he usually is so he didn't end overwhelming her more then she already is and gave her an explanation and heads up for some things that happen at the digital circus

So they're neutral with each other, but there's some care and respect in that relationship

Kauphmo -

Him and Kauphmo's relationship is Neutral

How they ended up in Digital Circus:

He got a headset for his birthday

When they ended up in Digital Circus:

Right after Kauphmo and waaaaay before Pomni arrived

Backstory/ Background:

Waaaaay before he became a Randy Flamingstone figure in the world of the amazing Digital Circus their name used to be , Tobias Ryus Morales and he was a 9 year old chubby afrolatino pyromaniac kid with long dark brown poofy hair, dark brown eyes, reddish brown tan skin, a chubby figure, a tooth gap, a dark purple and sweater, black jeans, and dark purple and black sneakers

His mom, her name is (Nova Jane Morales) was a part of the entertainment industry and she had this character named Randy Flamingstone. Randy Flamingstone is a plastic toy of a really famous cartoon character from an 80s children's show franchise. Randy Flamingstone is known for being as cool as Ice, calm , confident, determined, humorous, charming, and cunning

But Randy can also tend to be as dumb as a rock, he's a huge adrenaline junkie, competitive, pompous , obnoxious, and stubborn not only

that but Randy had a sentient race car named Buddy that's the complete opposite of him. His show and franchise is just as popular as SpongeBob SquarePants, Moster High, or Barbies

and it had a shitload of merchandise, spin offs, video games, and ect. (Along with lore even) just like any other mainstream cartoons.

Because of all of this kids and even his family members never seen Tobias as himself, but only as the the kid who's mom was Nova Morales, he fell down a road of what other child stars ended up going down, drugs and alcohol (but mostly alcohol for him) and not only that but it made Tobias to do risky things , therefore becoming a adrenaline junkie.

One day his friend had the bright idea to race someone down the road, but despite Tobias having a entire adrenaline junkie thing going on and love racing, Tobias didn't think it was a bright idea to go over the speed limit . This caused him to accidentally get into an accident that caused a fire , ending in him becoming both a burn victim and also fueled his pyromania even further !

A year after that incident , it was now Tobias's birthday at the age of 16 years old ,

____________________________________________

( Current appearance when he wasn't in the digital circus: what Tobias looks like is that he has long black poofy hair that's up in a man bun, dark brown eyes, reddish brown tan skin, a chubby figure, a tooth gap, he wears a black button up shirt with a lightning bolt on the pocket, he wears white pants with flames on it, he wears dark red sneakers, black sun glasses with black lenses, and a few piercings)

_______________________________________________

Tobias ended up getting the gaming headset he was begging to get, at the moment he ended up receiving the headset at the present opening time , he ended up trying it

And of course, that didn't end up well for him!!!

This blog better not, flop. I worked hard on these mother fuckers 😭

#tadc #tadc fanart #tadc fandom #tadc oc #the amazing digital circus #the amazing digital circus oc #original character #oc art #the digital circus #the digital circus oc

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suicidalashley · 5 days ago

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daniel: we are the mean skateboarding gang, and we are all named daniel. we're gonna snitch on primrose. she used to play virtual magic kingdom as a kid, and got a boyfriend on the game. he is a south korean man in his early 40s right now. he was one of the game developers, and he said he made the house party happen because she was so friendly and good at the computer game. andrew: i am one of her ancestors. daniel: how long has she been in your gang? andrew: since she played virtual magic kingdom. daniel: how does she know about the ancestors thing in gangs? andrew: i don't know. she wrote us in her complicated diary/aim. daniel: didn't she name you after bands? andrew: yes. but she's scared of music now, she gets overstimulated and likes violent songs, or creepy songs. primrose: darkwave is not creepy. andrew: yes it is. primrose: oh ok. i still have a bluetooth speaker. what do i do with it? i'm a minimalist. ki-moon: she's lying! she's a maximalist. why are you lying primrose? keeho: she wants to listen to kpop. but she gets too hype. she's a hype man. daniel: we loved her playlists. but she had some scary songs on there that didn't fit her values. but she should be able to listen to metamorphosis by hilary duff. we skateboard to that song. keeho: no! it talks about kissing. there is no song in the world that is approriate for her age. no music primrose. throw away the bluetooth speaker. primrose: no! i will give it to my mother. keeho: i don't want it. primrose: the charge lasts for 24 hours, basically, though? you can listen to sza for 24 hours. keeho: that's true... primrose: why do you watch surivvor and make ai meditation videos? keeho? keeho: bitch! that was a secret between me, your mommy and you. primrose: sorry daddy. but it's weird. maybe i just don't like the dirty ... what aesthetic is survivor? keeho: it's a wonderful show! primrose: sorry. i always make fun of the tv shows you watch. i feel so bad, daddy. i'm going to cry. keeho: it's ok baby! you're schizoaffective. sometimes your mean when you're in a bad mood, but you watched it with me last year and i was so happy. primrose: i'm glad that i could make you happy daddy. when are we going to watch You? keeho: next week... you. primrose is leaving keehos simulation in 5,4,3 keeho: you better stay put bitch! primrose is loving keehos simulation primrose: hi it's sun beam! let's study east asian religions instead of smoking weed! daniel: sun beam, go away you dumb hippie bitch. you're not a monk. primrose: yes i am! my room is my temple and brian and i drug deal from it. brian goes all over the world to deliver the drugs. and then he gets so high that he turns into buddha. but i don't do drugs. daniel: where do you have room in your americanized goshiwon to grow weed? primrose: i don't see the drugs or i would relapse. keeho is a good daddy. keeho: she is not lying. i hide the weed plants. brian: it used to be meth. high quality meth. keeho: after she started snorting it since she can't go to jail, she had a horrible and horrific trip hat lasted for a week straight. we killed her to bring her back. Lover Boy Kom bullied her to death. you need to be more sensitive to her disability, brian. ki-moon: she's so sexy. she doesn't drink alcohol either. do you drink, keeho? keeho: yes, i drink alcohol. primrose: let's go drink some mezcal. daniel: log off bitch. you lost your damn mind! primrose is offline

#p1harmony #keeho #metro goldwyn mayer #The Creators

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l1terally-justawizard · 1 year ago

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Yessssss unskippable cutscene #2 unlocked!!

Ok so the first one I sat down and listened to was Bombarded. Its about 3 bards (who are multiclassed one is a rouge, one is a barbarian, and one is a druid) who just got accepted into a magic music college and their adventures around the world! Every episode they write a song to use music magic to help them get out of stuff! There is a super cute lesbian slow burn side story with the half orc bardbarian and one of the NPC's it's the cutest ting in the world (the dm and the bardbarian yashi are married irl so it's even cuter that they're rping falling in love again) IRL they are all in a band together! So good and the final episode had me almost to tears in my local library!

The second one I started was Not Another DND Podcast (NADDPOD) Its about 3 people with totally differen backgrounds who get into wacky hijinks and save the world multiple times! (terrible summary but its amazing) they have a ton of fun guests on episodes and it's such a fun vibe! Also one of the people on there is a new player so they're teaching him how to play while they do it and it's fun to listen to! After they finished the first campaign they made other ones with the same people but different stories (personally I like the first one the best)

Then I was reccomended Worlds Beyond Number and hoooooolly shit its so beautiful and gorgeous!! I bet critical role is cool but this stuff is fantastic!!! They only have 18 episodes out right now and are updating every other Tuesday! Once again three people who were childhood friends split apart by their duties (hehe doodie) come together once again to fight as hidden evil that threatens the world as they know it!! Featuring my favorite Dm of all time Brennan Lee Mulligan He's so talented at storytelling and its so gorgeous! The worldbuilding alone is so facinating and each of the characters are such interesting complex people!!

Lastly but 100% not least Dungeons and Daddies (not a BDSM podcast)! Its about 4 dads flung into the forgotten realms to save their lost sons! Each of them are a different type of dad! Theres Darryl Wilson the stay at home barbecue sports coach dad, Henry Oak the crunchy hippie Birkenstock rocking nature dad, Glen Close the rock and roll bard dad who consumes copious amounts of drugs, and Ron Stampler the emotionally detached step dad who's really just trying his best! They all have to navigate the new world they're in while trying to better their relationship with their sons (also Daryll's son Grant is gay for a kid with his feet fused to a skateboard)

so those are the podcasts I have listened to/finished in my time listening to podcasts all of these are on Spotify and basically all listening platforms as far as I know! Also some of these podcasts have fanbases here on Tumblr for sure! Enjoy my good friend and please do tell me how you like these if you listen to them!

Once again, observe my Dungeons and dragons prowess

rainbow clickey clack math rocks

gorgeous~

#phew that was so fun #I don't get to infodump like this very often #be grateful we're not talking in person cause the speed at which I would have been talking would have been insane #I just get exited to share this stuff with people #cant wait for you to get sucked into the amazing world of dnd podcasts!!#dungeons and daddies #naddpod #worlds beyond number #bombarded

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dragonsontheceiling · 7 years ago

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I bought this for a thought, for a kiss, for a tale of a broken heart

#song: basic by declan mckenna #grunge #tumblr #skateboarding #hippie #hipster #skate #skatebrand #black and white #vans #alternative #declan mckenna

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the196thbattalion · 5 years ago

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star wars human! high school! au

i’ve seen so many headcanons circling throughout the star wars tumblr about high school au’s, so i wanted to share my bit with all of you :D

anakin skywalker

five words: REBEL CHILD ON A MOTORCYCLE.

he doesn’t like riding the school bus because it makes him feel extremely claustrophobic, so he scrapped and scavenged up parts to make his own customized motorcycle, which he lovingly dubbed artoo.

the blue and silver detailing was the joint effort of ahsoka and obi-wan, because anakin doesn’t know how to paint.

if he can catch up to the bus, he’ll ride alongside it and flip off the students on it before revving on ahead of them. (the freshmen think it’s the funniest thing in the universe)

probably one of the most well-known juniors in the entirety of temple high school (mostly because of his shenanigans but partly because he’s dating padme fuckiNG AMIDALA, PRETTIEST GIRL IN THE DAMN SCHOOL)

he always wears this worn-down leather jacket his mom gave to him before she passed away, and refuses to take it off, even though it’s somehow “a violation of the dress code and should be outlawed.”

his hair alone has seduced eight different students (boys and girls)

sometimes during study hall, ahsoka or padme will get a hold of his hair and style it into little braids or make a super rad ponytail.

he really likes iced coffee with milk and sugar. he puts in the milk to make it nice and light (it’s aesthetically pleasing, obi-wan!), and then like eight tablespoons of sugar to make it actually taste good.

his favorite class is mechanics, taught by kit fisto.

anakin spent months on a mechanical arm project to replace his clunky plastic prosthetic, and he was so freaking happy when it was finished; he almost cried. (he did cry and ahsoka got it on video)

obi-wan kenobi

a mixture of the soft™, pretty™, hippie™, grunge™, vsco™ and nerd™ tropes.

he really likes peppermint tea with lots of honey but takes his coffee black.

he has had too much tea.

someone needs to stop him.

almost all of his classes are ap courses, and if cody hadn’t been watching when obi-wan was making his schedule, all of them would be.

him, cody and padme have ap english with mace windu, and cody knows how much his classes stress him out, so he lets obi-wan sleep during class and sends him the notes

the only ap class obi-wan doesn’t take is mechanics, and he shares that class with anakin.

anakin and obi-wan are super close with each other. kenobi was there when ahsoka was adopted, and anakin was there when kenobi got his cat. (they were like 5 okay)

“NAME IT C3PO OBI-WAN, OR I SWEAR TO FUCK-” “what kind of name is that, and why would i - anAKIN PUT HIM DOWN!?”.

mr. fisto constantly has to split them up for disrupting the class, but it’s almost like they can communicate telepathically, and the teachers have a running bet

mace windu literally bet $50 on these fucking nerds so you know it’s for realsies

in reality, they’ve just gotten super creative with passing notes.

kind of off topic, but he has these brown harry potter glasses that he uses (kinda for reading???? but mostly so he can do that anime pushing up glasses thing)

cody thinks it’s the funniest shit ever

whenever cody is feeling stressed, obi-wan just does the thing™ and BOOM! happiness.

people think he’s a goodie two shoes, and honestly, it’s really easy to think that. if the iconics are trying to do something stupid, he’s usually the voice of reason.

but parties?

…

you know what, just ask anakin for the video footage.

ahsoka tano

this hs!au ahsoka tano turned me bisexual confirmed ✔

okay before i go into her style, which is mainly what made me drool over my computer, can i just put skatergirl!ahsoka out there?

spray painting of the rebellion symbol all over the bottom of her board and on items in a couple of the places where she skates the most (like the back of an abandoned car yard)

her instagram is filled with these super cool vhs-tape recorded skate videos (u know)

lots crackhead 3am visits (starring anakin, rex, kenobi and barris) to a gas station to get slushies and grind the shit out of the curb connecting the store to the parking lot

trying to teach anakin how to skateboard but he just can’t figure it out? uh yes

“try to balance skyguy!” “HOW DO I MOVE? DO I SCOOT? SNIPS THIS ISN’T FUNNY AND I WANT TO GET OFF – GUYS, STOP LAUGHING!”

okay okay okay i’m done

for now

anyway, her style???? is so???? fucking????? cool!!!!!

her genetics gave her a 80% of having vitiligo, so it really wasn’t a surprise when patches of her skin got lighter, but it still freaked her out a little bit.

basically, went like this: “DAD, I’M TURNING WHITE!” “???? oh my gosh ‘soka, no.”

she has long braided dreadlocks she dyed a super bright orange with various colored beads woven into them with the help of anakin and padme. she usually styles them into little space buns atop her head.

her entire clothing wardrobe consists of fishnets, neon bomber jackets, at least 11 bisexual beanies™, handmade patchy jeans, white tank tops, and light-up platform shoes.

she doesn’t give two flying fucks about the dress code, and – IN THE MIDDLE OF THE MOST BUSY HALLWAY - punched principal sidious over whether or not she “could wear shorts that short” (anakin may or may not have cheered when she broke his nose).

the fetts (chuck have mercy)

*cracks le knuckles* i’ve put it off long enough

we have: fox (24), wolffe (19), cody (17), rex (17), echo (16), fives (16), boil (15), waxer (14), hardcase (13), jesse (12), longshot (8), kix (6), tup (3), gree (2) and boba (9mo)

wolffe is off at college - fox already graduated and moved out, that cheeky little fucking shit - but both still keep in good contact with the fam, and it’s a constant clamor between eleven of the siblings of who gets to talk to them first

fox majored in government/politics, bly is majoring in space/astronomy, and wolffe is majoring in police/law enforcement shit (i don’t know how college works, so sue me)

cody and rex are juniors, and despite their similar looks, the amount of schoolwork each of them completes drastically varies

cody is the honor roll student, valedictorian, whatever you want to call it

rex kinda just either does the work really well or 9/10 times gets distracted by anakin or ahsoka sending him some nice spicy memes

cody tried to tutor rex but it ended up almost landing tup in the hospital

“that’s really simple, actually. if you – vod? rex, are you okay? what are you oH NO TUP DON’T PUT THAT IN YOUR MOUTH-”

fetts on the varsity football team is like a right of passage in the family

right now, only the juniors of the fett family are on the team, but the coach has eyes on fives and echo for next years team

SPEAKING OF

echo, fives and boil are the infamous sophomore trio that pulled the milk bucket prank on the gym teacher, pong krell.

they had to help the janitor (99) clean up afterwards, but they genuinely enjoyed 99’s company, because he’s rad as shit and knows all the secret school passageways.

to be honest, not one person (except maybe sidious) was complaining

that motherfucker makes everyone run like eight laps during gym class

even mr. windu gives them a small smile in the hallways after that

boil says he was blackmailed into it

waxer is a freshman (the poor dude, i’m so sorry), and he always looks out for the nervous freshies

if someone is having a bad day, he’ll give them a lollipop (he carries around a whole bag), a place to sit during lunch, and a shoulder to cry on

all you need to do to find waxer is to locate this long ass line of children

the school counselor, plo koon, sometimes brings his niece numa into school during the day because he can’t find a babysitter, and waxer. fucking. loves. her. PERIOD.

w+n pull these tiny little pranks on teachers, and the staff pretends not to notice, but numa always giggles and gives them away.

boil has a soft spot for numa too, and sneaks her rice krispies.

bonus shit i want to add in but can’t figure out where to put it (or i’m just gonna add it on and shit)

plo koon adopted anakin after his mother died (him and anakin’s mother were good friends), and found ahsoka on the side of the street, shivering like a maniac.

he doesn’t know where ahsoka came from, but he loves her so gOD DAMN MUCH.

he’s the school counselor, and still keeps in touch with a lot of students even after the graduated (he thinks that majoring in law enforcement/police is a bit dangerous for wolffe but he still supports his unofficial but basically son 100%)

yoda is the super old but radically rad english teacher.

his entire point of existence in my mind fic is to troll the shit out of palpatine.

a recent conversation starring yoda and palps: “did you give the students the mountain of extra work i assigned them?” “for the students, that was?” i’m sorry. my bad, that is.” “this is the seventh time, yoda.”

okay but for real

mace windu violently roots for the school football team.

“BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF HIM, CODY! YOU TOO...OTHER CODY!”

“THAT’S A HOLDING! THAT’S A HOLDING!”

“REF IF YOU DON’T COUNT THAT TOUCHDOWN THEN I SWEAR TO SAMUEL L. JACKSON I WILL COME DOWN THERE AND BEAT YOUR SORRY PINSTRIPED ASS!”

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punkscowardschampions · 4 years ago

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Amber & Cosmo

Amber: [Okay so I’m just gonna write my diabolical idea here so we know how it’s kicking off, basically whenever Dash and Amber hooked up- which was long ago enough that he should but hasn’t given her the stash back but literally never long enough ago that it won’t be gross to Cosmo that this happened, soz boy- she thought they were doing so in Dash’s bedroom but it’s actually his brother’s so when she comes back looking for her stash/anything she can replace it with, she’s actually ransacking Cosmo’s room and we know it’s blatantly because he lied that he didn’t have any drugs when he in fact did so he’s an all around lovely boy]

Amber: [picture the scene of him walking into his own room like wtf and then she has to hurriedly explain all of the above and then I figure I can start this convo when she’s for real in Dash’s room searching the right one lol]

Amber: I’m so so so sorry

Amber: I can’t find the words…

Cosmo: [The levels we would’ve been like GET OUT without terrifying her into fully leaving, in our room fuming rn]

Cosmo: Did you take any of my shit?

Amber: I’m not here for anything that isn’t mine, I told you

Cosmo: You said a lot

Cosmo: and fast

Cosmo: You’ll excuse me if I was more distracted by the more pressing issues like the stranger in my fucking room

Amber: Because you were saying the same thing again and again

Amber: and loud

Amber: my pressing issue was, and is, me not getting arrested

Cosmo: That’s your life choices

Cosmo: maybe don’t break and enter if you don’t wanna be worrying about that, there you go, pro-tip

Amber: Passive aggression towards me is understandable but please don’t threaten a real act of, you know I’m no burglar

Cosmo: I don’t know that, I don’t know who the hell you are

Amber: If you need to empty out my pockets to be sure, I’ve not left

Amber: yet

Cosmo: I can’t see anything missing

Amber: I feel stupid for not realising it couldn’t be his room

Amber: stupider

Cosmo: It’s an unpleasant way to find out he’s a piece of shit for you but you’ll be better off for knowing

Amber: Typically unfair of the universe not to let me have the information before we had sex

Cosmo: I might be more willing to extend sympathy if it weren’t in my fucking bed

Amber: Take mine because it was

Amber: but believe me that I didn’t know

Cosmo: Doesn’t change the fact

Cosmo: He’s fucking dead

Amber: I can’t change it now, but I’ll bring you some new sheets to show you the sorry was meant

Amber: and knock before I come through your window

Cosmo: Or you could just not, on both counts

Amber: if you want

Cosmo: Funny when someone breaks in you don’t really get much say

Amber: It’s your choice from here on though, I was being pushy when I thought it was your lying brother’s window

Cosmo: Generous

Cosmo: What are you even looking for?

Amber: 🌿 I borrowed my dad’s stash

Amber: borrowed is the important part

Cosmo: How does that work

Cosmo: except for not, clearly

Cosmo: You may as well go, ‘cos that will be long gone

Amber: Empty handed!? I can’t do that

Cosmo: Help yourself to any crap he’s got in there

Cosmo: doesn’t bother me

Amber: I don’t think there’s anything in here my father would accept as a 🕊

Cosmo: No shit

Cosmo: Unless he’s also got the taste of a wannabe hippie

Amber: Their wardrobes are unsurprisingly similar but he’d kill me if I brought home new items to replace the handful of old clothes he already owns

Cosmo: You’re one of them

Cosmo: Figures, only people who’ll associate with him at this point

Amber: Them?

Cosmo: You live in the compound

Amber: oh right 👽

Amber: yes, I’ve lived there for a few months

Cosmo: My sympathies on that one

Amber: 😂 Thanks, but even going back empty handed wouldn’t result in a RIP 🥤 ending, it’s okay

Cosmo: There’s hardly a shortage where that came from

Amber: or of worse places I could or have lived

Amber: Have you always lived here?

Cosmo: I’d phone social for you but the case is well-established already, I reckon

Cosmo: Dublin? Always

Cosmo: Better postcode for a bit but now just on the weekends

Amber: better because…?

Cosmo: All the reasons they put on the listings

Cosmo: price, location, near to whatever amenities you might want, idk, you know what better means

Amber: You forgot no strange girls climbing in your bedroom window, it was the perfect opportunity to stay angry at me

Amber: but this is better, agreed 🙃

Cosmo: I’m still angry, don’t worry

Cosmo: you’d not get anywhere near my dad’s windows

Amber: so you get the weekends off from me

Cosmo: I’m definitely not doing his dirty work for him, he doesn’t deserve that but neither do you so

Cosmo: If stealing your stash and not letting you in his room wasn’t hint enough, he’s not gonna make you his girlfriend, okay

Amber: I’m not THAT stupid, I don’t know what you got from first glance or this on going impression but it sounds like I don’t want to know

Cosmo: You aren’t going to be here every weekday then, that’s what I mean

Amber: I could be, I found a lot of spare rooms on the way to his, they’re not as nice as yours but they don’t have horrific memories attached

Amber: yet

Cosmo: We’re not looking for lodgers and you just moved

Amber: over half a year ago isn’t a just

Amber: Why don’t you want to live with me?

Cosmo: 😂

Cosmo: You’ve got jokes, at least, if not your stash

Amber: if you had manners you’d help me

Cosmo: You and my brother desecrated my bed

Cosmo: Why’d I owe you anything, like

Amber: You’re 🤬 at him, he’s owed us both getting our own back and I can’t do a good enough job at it on my own

Cosmo: You’ve got a point, alright

Cosmo: [Come in]

Amber: [picture her buried in this carnage because she’s so smol and his room was such a mess before she even got there, just looking at him as she’s trying unsuccessfully to like throw this mattress out of the window like hello]

Cosmo: [just walking over and taking that off her with ease because you’re tall, lean it against the wall like not gonna happen babe, because as much as we’d like to throw your mattress in the stinky pond, we don’t want to cause hassle for Ali or Billie because we’re a good boy unlike someone, rifle through the mess of clothes and put aside any that might be worth something, indicate as much by doing the money thing with your hands like kaching]

Amber: [at least she’ll be too busy being shamelessly impressed by how tall and strong you are to pout about it, so you’re welcome but also lowkey not because like I said shameless haha]

Cosmo: [at least you can maintain eye contact and look at her right back as you’re like ‘what?’ ‘cos you don’t not know what you look like lol]

Amber: [sitting down on a skateboard that’s on the floor because the bed would be off limits even if the mattress wasn’t on the lean ‘what are we doing?’ like we need do more than raid his clothes if we wanna really annoy him but also the saucy undertone is obvious especially because eye contact hasn’t been broken remotely]

Cosmo: [shrugs ‘he doesn’t care about anything’ but not as offhand as that sounds because we are constantly and entirely at a loss with him ‘take what will make it worth it for you’ break that eye contact to look around like hmm]

Amber: [rolls the skateboard at him but obvs in a playful not aggressive manner cos we’re getting up as if to leave like ‘it was nice to meet you’ because not at all unspoken vibe of that makes it worth it for me]

Cosmo: [pick it up as we raise a brow half like was it and half yeah it was ‘cos duh ‘these are pricey-’ gesture to all the skateboards lying about with the one you’re now holding ‘and easier to get out the window’]

Amber: [sitting on said window ledge rn because even if it’s a tiny one so is she and we were gonna climb out before he made that suggestion DUH ‘maybe but what’ll I do with them’ looks down at self and her aesthetic because we’re nothing if not self aware baby ‘other than string one of the wheels onto a necklace’]

Cosmo: [a small lol but in a yeah that’s true look at you way without being THE RUDEST ‘put ‘em in a sock and you’ve got a weapon’ does the thing where you pick something up with your toes on some laundry ‘I’d supply your own sock though’ like ew]

Amber: [a lol of her own at his monkey footed antics and opening the window like that sock is THE GROSSIEST and it stinks in here which lbr isn't that much of an exaggeration 'the creativity doesn't sweeten the deal enough that part of it would be allowing me to use violence for conflict resolution, sadly' a pout 'but admitting you want me to stay here instead of trying to get me kicked out of there remains an option, thankfully' a grin like 😁]

Cosmo: [at least you can throw some of his clothes out the window without affecting your mother and grandmother so doing that without touching anything truly DISGUSTANG but giving her a look as if that suggestion is, but with a 😏 ‘cos don’t need to go that hard with the rudeness rn ‘we’d charge more rent’]

Amber: [looks around at the stuff he has already said is worth money before hopping down from the window to pick up a guitar Dash has obvs left lying around 'how much?']

Cosmo: [shrugs because not our bag ‘aren’t all instruments kinda expensive?’ ‘cos true unless it’s like a play guitar lmao]

Amber: ['instruments in this condition are, sure' because we're blatantly holding a flashy electric guitar rn not a beat up acoustic like she's used to seeing all the hippies play 'but it can't have any sentimental value' like there's no point taking it if he's not even gonna notice]

Cosmo: [‘good luck with that’ like he don’t care about anything ‘cos that’s how it seems hen]

Amber: [such a face on because even though he's proved they weren't friends and he's a dick she at least thought his hippie vibe wasn't total bollocks but all this expensive shit hard-core goes against that so with a sigh and a shrug she's going back to the window like well I might as well leave then 'thanks anyway, and sorry, again']

Cosmo: [a noise like that’s simplifying things a bit, a psh if you will, ‘guess he fucked you over first’ but a sincere face to show we know he did ‘just don’t do this again’ gestures vaguely like what bit do you mean sir]

Amber: ['it's my dad's stash, not mine' as if that's the only thing Dash did wrong because we're not gonna get into the fact you've known him for months you thought and likewise thought you were friends as everyone just thinks you're a slutty hippie stereotype so you have no reason to believe it's not the same assumption here 'I'll find a different way to replace it']

Cosmo: [reach in your pocket like how much even though you are a bit 😒 because essentially paying for your dickhead brother’s habit rn]

Amber: ['no!' such a fierce shake of her head and such a fiercely angry face because it's not his debt or problem even if it was actually about the money/ drugs instead of the lies and Dash's shitty behaviour which turns into a sad face/head in hands moment when she says 'I was beginning to think I couldn't feel any worse about how I've treated you' and just really quietly basically under her breath adding 'stupid' because @ herself for everything including thinking this was a good idea and still being here]

Cosmo: [‘hey’ and moving forward but then moving back awkwardly just as fast ‘cos we don’t really know what to think about you rn, as is this weird situation you find yourselves in ‘forget about it, I’m fine’ add ‘and the bit that ain’t fine is on him so don’t feel bad, honestly’]

Amber: [at least you can't see that awkward move back and feel worse for that gal because even though he's right and it's not really your fault you feel bad 'it's my fault he used your room, plenty of other girls from the commune wouldn't and haven't insisted on going anywhere else, and mine too that I'm at your house again today...I should've let it go' because we're never gonna be the peace and love cliche soz parents but we know that's what you want]

Cosmo: [‘he’s owed worse’ like I get why you didn’t let it go, even if your method is dubious babe]

Amber: [a smile that’s genuine relief because who else gets it in your life remotely but then you remember that so you’re like ‘retribution delivered karmically not by me’ but we still haven’t left and we obviously don’t mean it and aren’t trying to pretend we do with our tone because we’re not at the commune now bitches fight us]

Cosmo: [‘good luck with that’ ‘cos same energy of that’s bullshit]

Amber: [a little lol because he literally typed exactly that earlier like okay boy I get it ‘I’m owed worse’ than bad luck or being called out on bullshit that isn’t even hers but he thinks is, both definitely]

Cosmo: [‘undoubtedly’ and a shrug like soz, life’s shit]

Amber: ['where did you get it?' Meaning the money he just tried to give her obvs because she's thinking she might have to get a job to pay her dad back and even though she's clearly worked out from what he said about a better postcode at the weekend and how much stuff Dash has and how he treats it that it's likely from his dad but we hate when people make assumptions about us so we're not trying to do that]

Cosmo: [‘I go to a football academy’ not in the braggy way that sounds just stating the fact, she’s probably not aware that means you get paid boy but go off ‘if you need the cash, you should just take it’ like seriously gal, looking at her like]

Amber: ['What's that like?' SO surprised and intrigued in all the ways not like you could NEVER boy but she's obviously never met anyone else who does anything like that and even more importantly just really driving the point home that we don't know a thing about you and how wild it is we are here having this convo not to mention you're literally offering us money again which we are gonna shake our head to again as we make yet more eye contact 'when I need the money, I'll figure it out for myself' not angry tone this time just stating a fact]

Cosmo: [When you don’t really know how to answer that ‘cos the assumption always is that it’s a dream come true obvs because it is a big opportunity but it’s still a job at the end of the day, one you start much younger than most kids even get a part-time so we’re kinda like what do you mean lmao ‘yeah, it’s great, better than wasting my time at normal school, like’ asking a question back ‘cos not rude ‘you go to school?’ ‘cos undoubtedly aware loads of the commune lot don’t]

Amber: [‘I'm picturing the hunger games with a football' cos we are and that's what we mean lol because normal school is savage enough never mind something so focused on talent and competitiveness like 'are you a scorer?' Bringing back her adorably not knowing football terms and it's like it makes sense you would thrive there if you are and that type haha, nodding our answer to his question 'my dad teaches the kids who don't go' as if that's the only reason we go to school]

Cosmo: [little lol ‘maybe when you’re younger’ ‘cos obviously not all of you make it ‘but we all have pro contracts now, the deadweight is gone’ pop off with the basic explanation of your position on the team for her, we know the vibe hun, nods back ‘better than nothing, I guess’ but we clearly don’t really think so ‘you’re in his year?’ part sympathy part disgust lmao]

Amber: [obviously gonna ask him who his contract is with and if she can see him play but I won't commit you to picking a real team if you don't want to it's just to show that she's genuinely interested because likewise asking him other relevant questions when he's explaining the position he plays etc 'I don't mind school, being in the year above him definitely helps’ because my vibe is she would like school for lots of reasons but she's also Lowkey struggling a lot with it hence she doesn't really have time for a job rn very past me energy of having to do schoolwork until you literally go to bed]

Cosmo: [‘I don’t think it’ll be your scene’ and such a look of confusion that she asked like what do you want, suspish lol, smile though ‘that’s something’ ‘cos no one should have to suffer Dash in our opinion lmao]

Amber: ['Why not?' Such a genuine question but we aren't mad yet because we've clearly never been to a football match before so he might have a valid reason for thinking that and gonna give him the benefit of the doubt and obviously gonna throw something vaguely school related out of the window but nothing that would inconvenience your poor mother or nan though like yeah it's gonna be very important to me that we don't have to cross paths at school as well cos livid lol]

Cosmo: [‘Come on, you don’t think it’s all meat pies and

misogynists, like?’ with a 😏 energy ‘people like you are more likely to run onto the pitch with a sign than sit in the stands’ shakes head ‘sure he skives loads anyway, as the rest of this house actually has places to be and can’t keep a constant eye on him like the kid he is’ like you’ll barely have to see him, don’t worry, probs true]

Amber: [a lol ' are you saying it is or just that you don't want someone like me waving a sign with your name on from the stands?' Ignoring the Dash stuff entirely because now we know what a knob he is we are so over him]

Cosmo: [who can possibly say energy because that’s amused us lowkey]

Amber: ['I wanna see you play' because we do]

Cosmo: [‘why?’ because the levels we’re like WHAT DO YOU WANT cannot be overstated lmao]

Amber: [' Because I think it sounds fun, why don't you want me to?']

Cosmo: [‘if you want to go to a football match, you can’ like you don’t need to come to mine, which sounds ruder than we mean it, just pointing this out]

Amber: [the poutiest because rude and also we aren't stupid we're aware of that thank you boy 'and hold up a sign saying what, for who?' Because duh the fun is cheering you on sir]

Cosmo: [‘We don’t do cheerleaders’ but looking at her slightly less suspish and more curious]

Amber: ['okay, I won't wear the outfit, your loss' accidentally very saucy mental image soz not soz]

Cosmo: [we’re getting such slag vibes ‘cos of how this has all gone down so we’re like steady on gal ‘cos we’re not trying to put out that we’ll get on you ‘cos we know you’ve got previous, not that kinda boy, very #awks on your behalf ‘funny’]

Amber: [Ngl love that because she’s really not but he’s gonna keep thinking this for ages if she hooks up with a random at the clerb again this time and when she dates this old ass dude despite the fact it’s the first time she’s done either haha ‘Pom poms are usually plastic’ spoken like plastic is a swear word lol ‘and tissue paper isn’t recyclable either, environmentally responsible arts and crafts are the limit’]

Cosmo: [rolls eyes but not in the sarky energy of the emoji ‘what the fuck would you wave, some broccoli?’]

Amber: ['I can cut the cardboard into any shape’ so amused genuinely ‘so yes, if you like’]

Cosmo: [‘sure I wouldn’t wanna hinder your creativity, express yourself’ in a faux hippie energy]

Amber: ['I wouldn’t want everyone to think I was there protesting the pies and misogyny’🤔 ‘What number are you?’]

Cosmo: [‘hopefully I don’t mess up or you’ll have to add the racism to the list’ but tell her your number obvs]

Amber: [do a tick on the palm on her hand with her finger like noted ‘Does that mean I’m invited?’]

Cosmo: [‘it’s not an invite event’ shrugs ‘cos we still do not get this lmao ‘can’t stop you’]

Amber: [‘Unfriendly’ because I’m bringing that pun back thank you]

Cosmo: [my boo says I can and I will, ‘so weird’ kinda under our breath but not in a snide way so she could hear]

Amber: [‘it being weird to be interested in getting to know you says more about you than me’ like 😏 energy of what you’re so unlikeable are you as if the weirdness doesn’t come from the fact you hooked up with his brother and then broke into his house but okay babe]

Cosmo: [‘we’re not going to be friends’ like that’s a fact, bit rude but also I understand]

Amber: [‘We could be’ again so genuine as if there’s not reasons why you wouldn’t]

Cosmo: [‘no’ very simply even if we’re a bit #conflicted ‘cos don’t want to be a dick to you]

Amber: [‘okay’ because you literally can’t and wouldn’t argue with that so just actually go to leave for real this time gal]

Cosmo: [gonna have to let her go for now but let some time pass but like 15 mins ish not like a long time, enough that she’s gone though]

Cosmo: I didn’t mean to offend you

Amber: You didn’t, it would have offended me if you’d said no after your first 👀

Cosmo: Good

Cosmo: because it’s not about you

Cosmo: it isn’t a problem with you personally, I mean

Amber: it’s about your brother, I know, I’m not a real 👽 I understand why

Cosmo: Amongst other things, yeah

Amber: other things you don’t have to explain to me, it’s okay, I meant and mean it

Cosmo: alright

Amber: Thanks for trying to help me

Cosmo: There’s other ways to screw him over, if you want to

Amber: are there?

Cosmo: ‘course

Cosmo: there are things he cares about, even if not his things

Amber: like…?

Cosmo: think about it, he made it obvious

Cosmo: access to drugs and hippie girls

Amber: I don’t have a way to take either of those from him

Cosmo: Yeah you do

Cosmo: you live there, they’re your ‘family’ or whatever nonsense

Amber: not the girls he goes for, they’re always new

Cosmo: you can’t put it in the welcome pack

Amber: I’m not going to draw more attention to him, there’s already too much, and some of these girls would be more attracted to any negatives I pointed out, for reasons I don’t need to explain

Cosmo: drugs then, the new girls won’t be the source of those

Amber: Neither am I

Cosmo: it’ll be blokes

Cosmo: or at least adults

Cosmo: braindead or otherwise, they can’t all be fooled by him and his bullshit

Cosmo: get him cut off

Amber: I’m flattered you think my word is worth more than money to a dealer, but I’m not sure it is

Cosmo: I thought it was nature’s bounty with you lot only

Cosmo: and you pretended to have morals about it all

Amber: pretended being the key word, but I’ll try and get him blacklisted

Cosmo: I’m just saying, fuck up his spot there, that’s the only thing that would bother him

Cosmo: If you can’t then you can’t, sorry

Amber: I just don’t want him to think I care about his behaviour because of the bad sex we had, which he probably will

Cosmo: Yeah, probably

Cosmo: he loves himself enough to believe everyone else does

Amber: If they were my sisters this would be a lot easier

Cosmo: It’s a big enough place to avoid him, yeah?

Amber: But letting him get away with this is giving him free passes for as long as he wants to lie and treat other people the same, I shouldn’t allow it when the only reason is because I don’t really have time for a full blown vendetta, who am I if I do that?

Amber: …sorry for the vent, this isn’t your responsibility

Cosmo: You’re clearly a decent person

Cosmo: You can’t be responsible for all the ones that aren’t

Cosmo: I should do something because he’s my brother, right

Cosmo: but I can’t

Amber: I’m taking the compliment, after that we can stop talking about him

Cosmo: You wanted help with it

Amber: And the dealer angle is helpful ⭐️

Cosmo: Alright, I didn’t have to like but I felt bad for you

Amber: You could’ve stopped there and not made me feel bad about myself

Cosmo: I was trying to do the opposite

Cosmo: you got sarky with your ⭐️s

Cosmo: I didn’t fuck you over

Amber: It was genuine, for a genuinely good idea! I also said thank you and sorry, like, multiple times

Cosmo: Who uses gold stars genuinely

Amber: My dad has sheets of them he never uses sarcastically if you wanna start being someone

Cosmo: Alright, teacher jokes

Cosmo: You understand that it looks sarcastic though

Cosmo: To standard people

Amber: To people who don’t think it was a good idea, you mean, but who are they? It makes sense and will probably work

Amber: and I understand why it’s easier for you to take this stance with me, sure, we’ve been through that

Cosmo: What stance?

Amber: close to argumentative without crossing over the line, defensive

Cosmo: You broke into my house, I dunno how you aren’t getting that

Cosmo: unless you’re purposefully pretending not to, which is your dick move, not mine

Amber: I know I did, but you have no reason to feel unsafe because of me, which we’ve also been through

Cosmo: I don’t, feel unsafe

Cosmo: I don’t think that means we need to talk or get to know each other

Amber: It’s not going to happen again which means you don’t have to see me again, and we can stop talking any time too

Cosmo: You’re acting like I’m being rude

Amber: No, I said it was fine when you asked me if I was offended

Cosmo: What were you trying to do, asking about me

Amber: get the answers

Cosmo: 🙄

Cosmo: Yeah but why

Amber: Why wouldn’t I want to leave you with an impression which isn’t me as some BIG BAD coming through your window? Because I’m not and you wouldn’t think so if we bumped into each other in town anywhere ‘normal’

Cosmo: So you was trying to get yourself out of trouble

Cosmo: Yeah, okay, that makes sense

Cosmo: I just wanted to know why, that’s all

Amber: I don’t wanna be in trouble but it wasn’t that calculating

Amber: isn’t

Amber: meeting new people, striking up conversation in situations that other people often don’t think are natural, kinda are to me

Cosmo: It’s not a bad thing, I could’ve called the police on you

Cosmo: obviously you don’t want that

Cosmo: you don’t need to worry, I won’t, even if it is a bit late now anyway

Cosmo: Sure, but even so

Cosmo: you can’t say you’re doing that on the regs

Amber: You don’t have my name and the description you could give wouldn’t narrow it down very much once you directed them here

Amber: but I’d still prefer you didn’t, I’m not gonna lie

Amber: I don’t get pushed to those extremes regularly, no, because most people who say they’re my friends are and don’t treat me how Dash did

Amber: if you’re waiting for me to say sorry for making the best out of the unexpected, you being there, I’m not going to

Cosmo: I’ve seen plenty of them, they don’t look like you

Cosmo: Well I’m glad to hear you aren’t regularly breaking and entering

Cosmo: I don’t need an apology

Amber: What do you need, besides the ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️?

Cosmo: Ha ha

Cosmo: like I said, I just didn’t get it

Cosmo: and who says I want to leave a bad impression either

Amber: I haven’t met a ⚽️🏆⭐️ before, if I asked too many questions, that’s why, but if I made you feel uncomfortable, that’s a worse impression and you’ll get an apology anyway

Amber: Not you, or you wouldn’t have helped and I’d be talking to the police instead

Cosmo: I’m used to that

Cosmo: Usually from lads though

Cosmo: or girls but it’s more obviously fake

Cosmo: I’m no ⭐️ yet anyway

Cosmo: I’m not being compared to him, even if that means doing shit it isn’t my job to, I’d rather

Amber: I’m not comparing you, in spite of it turning out I only know Dash as well as I know you

Amber: you could’ve told me you didn’t want me coming to watch you play because of the other girls that do, I’m used to plenty at school being jealous of the way I look

Cosmo: And I intend to keep it that way, the lack of comparison

Cosmo: If I say that’s not what I meant will you accuse me of trying to make you feel bad again?

Amber: What did you mean? If you’re not trying to make me feel bad, I won’t accuse you of anything you haven’t done

Cosmo: It’d be weird if you came because my dad will be there

Amber: I’m even more used to that, all my ‘normal friends’ parents are judgmental about my piercings and the tattoos they can see, it’s okay, I don’t have to come

Cosmo: He wouldn’t judge you, but games are about winning, focus, all that

Cosmo: not inviting random strangers

Amber: He’d still be judging me for how he thinks I’ll behave, as a distraction, either way I’m a bad influence 😈

Cosmo: He’d just be pissed off with me, honestly

Amber: I’ll have to wait to watch you on tv one day, keeping it a secret from my parents who’d be 😠 at me

Amber: and if I get too impatient I can always break into the bedroom of one of your teammates, befriend them and cut their number out of cardboard…

Cosmo: You reckon, do ya

Amber: That you’ll be a 📺⭐️ or someone else on the team will be happy to have me appear in their bedroom? Because yes, I do

Cosmo: 😂 Can’t knock the confidence

Amber: Negging hasn’t been considered flirting since approximately the 90s, so no

Cosmo: Reckoning I’m flirting with you borders on delusional

Amber: which borders on what, ableism? Keep going if you have nothing to do but dig to Australia

Cosmo: Entertaining your fantasies isn’t a requirement for being a good person, whatever politically correct label you wanna throw on it

Amber: If my fantasies were that instantaneous I wouldn’t need entertainment from anywhere else

Cosmo: Good luck with that

Amber: Thanks, I am bored enough to attempt construction of a fully make believe world

Cosmo: You have time to get bored?

Amber: it’s not a forced labour camp

Cosmo: you wouldn’t keep around useless stoners if it was

Amber: And as someone who fits that mould, thank god 🙌🏽

Cosmo: it’s usually more exploitation in the name of free love anyway

Cosmo: and that doesn’t sound familiar at all

Amber: Because you’ve never been in any way exploited

Cosmo: I haven’t, actually, but that’s not really the point

Amber: Of course you have

Cosmo: How have I?

Cosmo: You’re chatting shit which won’t detract from the fact that place attracts nothing but predators of one kind or the other

Amber: Your parents sacrificed you to ⚽️🏆⭐️ the same as mine did to me with ✌🏽☮️💙 we’re both indoctrinated, yours just has a definite job prospect attached to it

Cosmo: You don’t know a single thing about me or my parents, you asked a few questions

Cosmo: you confirmed my brother picks off new girls like a opportunist abuser, and I know he ain’t the only one who treats that place like that

Cosmo: I didn’t say fuck all about you or your parents

Amber: Sport attracts predators too, nobody’s condemning it because of how a large number of people in positions of power treat the ones they have power over

Cosmo: Sport is regulated

Cosmo: for fuck’s sake

Amber: We open our doors to vulnerable people, there are always going to be other people who try and take advantage of that, and maybe at the next place they do there won’t also be as many people around who care

Cosmo: Yeah, you’ve identified the problem there

Cosmo: vulnerable people need protection and actual help

Cosmo: not care from a bunch of people who are entirely unqualified to do shit

Amber: They get help from qualified adults, not every person living there is a clueless teenager and you are actually allowed to leave

Cosmo: Yeah, that’s the point, anyone getting enough real help would leave

Cosmo: it’s a half-way house at best and for every ‘success’ and person that gets the fuck out, you have just as many that get sucked into bullshit they otherwise wouldn’t if you weren’t there

Amber: You’ve never even been there

Cosmo: Don’t need to

Cosmo: if the evidence weren’t out my window, it’s in my house and all so

Amber: Dash based evidence would make anyone cynical

Cosmo: You wish he was your only problem

Cosmo: just because he’s a dick, don’t mean he’s not got it from somewhere, or he wouldn’t get away with it

Amber: Nowhere’s perfect or fucked irreparably, you wish it was that cut and dry

Cosmo: I’m not the one who thinks I’m creating a utopian society

Cosmo: no one needs perfect, just not batshit harmful bullshit

Amber: Neither am I

Cosmo: Not you personally

Amber: So stop attacking me personally, get a 📢 and point it out of your window towards someone who really believes all the things you think are harmful bullshit

Cosmo: I’m not attacking you

Amber: You’re saying things I either have to agree or disagree with about my home and way of life that I’ve already had to spend a really long time defending or denouncing in exactly the same way

Cosmo: You don’t like it because it’s true

Cosmo: I can’t help that

Cosmo: but it’s exactly why there’s no point talking again

Amber: I can’t help that my parents like it there and really believe in things I don’t

Cosmo: Don’t they care what you want?

Amber: I go to school, we’ve stayed long enough for me to make friends, as far as they are concerned, I’m getting what I want

Cosmo: Is that all you want though?

Amber: it’s getting my own way more than a lot of my friends do, what 17 year old gets everything they want?

Cosmo: Parents should give a shit about their kid’s happiness

Cosmo: it’s not being a brat about wanting more money and a later curfew

Amber: I care about their happiness too

Cosmo: they aren’t meant to make that your problem

Amber: Putting me first and their own lives to the side would cause problems for all of us, if they’re miserable I’m not gonna be happy, and not expressing it wouldn’t mean it wasn’t still obvious

Cosmo: Are they happy?

Amber: Happier than they’ve been for years, my dad left his girlfriend and my mama has a new boyfriend, they’re both loving their jobs and the people they’ve met here who they aren’t dating too… I’d say they are

Cosmo: You’re scared they’ll want to leave again

Cosmo: or that place will get shut down and they’ll be no choice in it

Amber: They will or it will, what I’m afraid of is when it does I’ll make the choice to stay and they won’t

Cosmo: If they’d rather be helping other people than their own kid that’s fucked

Amber: I’m their 👶🏽 forever but not a child, they’d rather treat me like an adult

Cosmo: Whether you’re ready for that or not?

Amber: Some things you don’t ever feel ready for, but they have to happen anyway and when they do you’re almost always 😁 or at least slightly relieved it’s done

Cosmo: You aren’t old enough to be left anyway, whatever they’d rather do

Amber: An irrational fear for a while longer

Amber: I’m not bored enough for crystal healing

Cosmo: That’s not a thing

Cosmo: you’re taking the piss now

Amber: it’s not something that works, but it’s something that happens

Amber: often

Cosmo: I suppose I don’t even wanna know what that entails

Cosmo: if it’s not good enough for max boredom even

Amber: What are you doing? Now that you’re done making me question my entire life

Cosmo: I really weren’t

Cosmo: I know there’s fuck all you can do but there’s plenty actual adults there could and haven’t long before you showed

Cosmo: I need to go do my run

Cosmo: I’m behind schedule now

Amber: You haven’t really, don’t feel bad, it’s my turn again for putting you behind schedule

Cosmo: Inexcusable, really

Cosmo: If we’d have found a way for you to get back at him and/or get your money back we’d be further behind so win some lose some

Amber: I’m sorry x 9

Cosmo: I get it, I don’t deserve the sincerity of actually bothering to type it out

Cosmo: Call it even then?

Amber: I’d prefer to call us odd but okay

Cosmo: ‘course, got to keep it 👽 I know

Amber: Tempting fate slightly, unless you want to get abducted on your run

Cosmo: I was clearly after an invitation, yeah

Cosmo: I’m alright, tah, only one dickhead who looks like me will be showing

Amber: Is that my invite to a race? Because I don’t think I’d be able to beat you

Cosmo: Is that humility? Doesn’t seem like you

Cosmo: you’ve already been abducted yourself, obvs

Amber: Or shameless untrue flattery

Cosmo: Hmm

Cosmo: Possible, yeah

Cosmo: but you never would beat me so we’re at real delusion again

Amber: Distance or speed?

Cosmo: I have unfair advantages for both

Cosmo: I run up and down a field for 90 minutes a time, and I have about double the leg length you do

Amber: It’s really cute you think I’d let anything happen fairly when I could just cheat

Cosmo: There’s no point having any kind of competition if you don’t follow the rules

Cosmo: take your hollow victory then, see if it feels good

Amber: You’ve made me not want it now! 🥺

Cosmo: N’awh

Cosmo: right buzzkill, I know

Amber: Besides leg measuring, what do you do for fun? And don’t say run up and down a field for 90 minutes

Cosmo: Just what us footie lads are like, good clean fun, unlike rugby

Cosmo: what do you actually do, when you’re avoiding crystal healings?

Amber: The big 🚿 at the end can’t be what makes you happiest either, I don’t believe that’s true of anyone

Amber: other than shopping, I’m sure I do mostly the same as the rest of the girls you know

Cosmo: IDK I’m sure it makes the predatory coaches buzzing when we’re all lathered up 🧼

Cosmo: but shopping is all the girls I know do 😜

Cosmo: I’m the same, is your actual answer, what every 17 year old lad with some disposable income does

Amber: Great, I’ll need the healing to erase that visual…

Amber: It can’t be, because then I’ll have to feel sorry for you AND the girls you know, they’ll have other interests they’re avoiding telling you about, like I am

Amber: the boys I know our age definitely don’t seem like they do much of anything, besides get drunk and high, so there must be A LOT of other hobbies they’re keeping secret from me too

Cosmo: Maybe you’ve uncovered the truth there

Cosmo: Girls and boys don’t tell each other everything, or anything

Cosmo: Or we both know poor examples

Cosmo: Who’s to ever be sure

Amber: But now it’s been uncovered, either way, we can change it

Amber: I’ll go first, the childish faves I was keeping from you are swimming and dancing, because they make me sound about 9 years old

Cosmo: I don’t think so

Cosmo: depends on how you frame it, swimming is great cardio and underwater is a great place to think or not think as much as you need

Cosmo: dancing, likewise great cardio, and good for the soul, sure your lot would put it, mood-boosting for the rest of us

Cosmo: you sound very well-⚪️ed, if anything, not 👶

Amber: It’s your turn

Cosmo: alright, bossy

Cosmo: you already know I like football and I like to run

Cosmo: I like the gym too, swimming as well, actually

Cosmo: going out for meals, drinks, all that stuff

Amber: Nobody likes the gym, the effects and ego boost maybe

Cosmo: I do

Cosmo: it’s a building with workout equipment in, not a torture chamber

Cosmo: and the one at the academy is really good

Amber: you like how much you can 🏋🏽‍♂️ and having your friends to compete against

Cosmo: is that a question or an assumption

Amber: I’m changing it to a question because you caught me in an assumption, which I hate, so ?

Cosmo: 😏

Cosmo: competition is a good motivator, so is seeing progress in your abilities, sure

Cosmo: exercise makes you feel better, whatever form you like doing it in, it’s that simple

Amber: I’m not gonna lie and pretend I do yoga for any other reason than how flexible I am as a result, I guess we finally agree on something, even if it is something shallow

Cosmo: It’s not shallow

Cosmo: giving a shit about your body and your health isn’t just because looking good is nice, it also feels better

Amber: but if I cared about my health there are vices I’ve picked up that I wouldn’t have and things I wouldn’t put into my body which I do, you’re on a journey and I’m doing the occasional day trip

Cosmo: Very hippie-approved

Cosmo: songs about it and everything, right

Cosmo: I do drink, I just try not to get wasted

Cosmo: it’d be unsociable not to at all

Amber: You’d look like a 👽 and you’d have to move somewhere that isn’t Dublin

Cosmo: And change my occupation

Amber: drastic avoidance tactic to stop me from meeting your dad or watching you play

Cosmo: 😂 Not all about you, hippie

Amber: That’s the rudest thing you’ve said to me so far!

Cosmo: And WAGs are meant to be high-maintenance…

Amber: meaning they put time and effort into their appearance, which you just applauded as a virtue in yourself

Cosmo: No, meaning you have to put a lot of effort in to maintain the relationship

Cosmo: but it was a joke before you get all soapbox about it

Amber: a joke I’m not gonna let you get away with making, boy

Amber: but if we need to talk about anything it’s that you don’t think all relationships require a lot of time and effort

Cosmo: I didn’t, it’s a joke that’s made, by people in general

Cosmo: it’s more 🤑🤩 maintenance people are implying, not 🥰😘

Amber: You repeated it, like it’s funny or true, or both

Amber: after I told you I hate assumptions, and stereotypes aren’t any different

Cosmo: They’re inevitable and you’ve made loads about me, my friends and my family so

Cosmo: that sounds like your problem

Amber: The difference is, I’m trying to not and I apologised when I did, you’re doubling down

Cosmo: I’m not doubling down because it’s a joke, which means I didn’t mean it in the first place

Cosmo: You did and that’s why you’re mad

Amber: Why are you like this?

Cosmo: Like what?

Amber: 2 seconds away from an argument at ALL times

Cosmo: You’ve started every one

Cosmo: People like you reckon you can say whatever bullshit you want like you’re so knowing and zen and then I’m the arsehole for not just letting you chat shit on me

Amber: You keep saying people like me, when I’m obviously not like that

Amber: zen or all knowing

Cosmo: I said it was bullshit

Cosmo: It’s what you wanna project

Cosmo: that you’ve got it figured out, which is why you live such a mental way of life, because it’s actually the RIGHT way of life and we’re all stupid and brainwashed, not yous

Cosmo: ⭐️

Amber: I told you why I live there and that I don’t believe in it

Amber: using ⭐️ against me is bullshit

Cosmo: Maybe you can’t help it

Cosmo: you don’t even know you’re doing it

Amber: Do you know you’re being a fucking asshole?

Cosmo: Yeah

Cosmo: do you?

Amber: now I do

Amber: It’s not an intention, but you’re right, sometimes I open my mouth to speak and either of my parents come out

Cosmo: I know the feeling

Cosmo: maybe that’s inevitable too

Cosmo: how individual are any of us really, we’re all just a mess of the people we know

Amber: Better not be! Or I’ve really wasted years fighting to think for myself, carving out compromises to end up not even wanting them

Cosmo: Won’t say good luck with that but

Cosmo: it’s a nice thought, anyway

Amber: A nicer thought than becoming them, living like this forever and being happy with that

Cosmo: What do you want to do?

Amber: It’s stupid

Amber: but I wanna eat 🍕 and buy a new 👗 to wear out somewhere and come home and sleep in a 🛏 on my own or with the same fucking person

Cosmo: That isn’t stupid

Cosmo: I think that’s what a lot of people want

Cosmo: Some variation of, when it comes down to it

Amber: It’s what my school friends already have, that’s why it’s stupid, because I shouldn’t have to fight for it, it’s stupid because they think I have the type of freedom they daydream about

Cosmo: Maybe you do have things they don’t have but want

Cosmo: maybe they’re not as close to their parents, or they’re an only-child who would kill for all the people around

Cosmo: or maybe some people are lucky from the start and some have to make their own

Amber: maybe x 9

Cosmo: If you’re keeping count

Cosmo: You’ll be able to get all those things

Amber: Not for a while, but one day, maybe

Amber: because if I’m keeping count that’s only 4

Cosmo: There’s time for a few more

Amber: If you introduce me to the girls you know who do nothing but shop, I could get a new 👗 in no time, right?

Cosmo: Or you could go with your own friends

Cosmo: the non-commune ones, that won’t cry at a plastic bag

Amber: Maybe… if I hadn’t had the fast fashion rant at them all, I don’t even know I’m doing it, I told you you’d got that right

Cosmo: Ah

Cosmo: I see

Cosmo: I could take you if you want

Cosmo: you’ll have to take cover in the rails if you see one of them coming

Amber: I don’t wanna mess up your schedule again, you’ll have to fit me in when it suits you, not when I’m pouting

Cosmo: Right, so when are you not pouting? 🤔

Amber: When you stop being mean to me

Amber: maybe

Cosmo: Good use of a maybe

Cosmo: How about Saturday lunchtime

Cosmo: I have to eat, after-all

Amber: Teeth off me and my 👗

Cosmo: Not a cannibal

Cosmo: or a moth?

Cosmo: I’m just saying, that’s a free hour, if you’re worried about my schedule

Amber: okay, 1 shop, I promise

Amber: less than an hour

Cosmo: I’ll take that as a maybe

Cosmo: I’m not going to put you on a timer, like

Cosmo: Saturdays are pretty flexible and you’re going to wanna take time to enjoy yourself and all

Amber: You don’t wanna race me, I know

Cosmo: You don’t wanna cheat no more

Cosmo: maybe

Amber: I won’t

Cosmo: Alright

Cosmo: I still don’t wanna make you sad

Amber: I’m not gonna cry because you take 🥇

Cosmo: As long as that’s a promise

Amber: it is, maybe I didn’t know anything about ⚽️ before today but I understand sportsmanship`

Cosmo: What shops do you want to go to?

Amber: I was kinda hoping you’d know the answer

Cosmo: I do, I’ve got you covered then

Cosmo: Pick you up [time]

Amber: from where?

Cosmo: There’s a phonebox outside there, right? Go there

Amber: 🦸🏽

Cosmo: I’ll look for the 🤓 then

Amber: When you asked me what I wanted to do, my first thought was my homework

Cosmo: Serious?

Amber: I have a LOT and it’s really hard to concentrate here

Cosmo: You remember what window is actually his?

Cosmo: ‘cos he’s never in so

Cosmo: You could

Cosmo: as long as you don’t come in the rest of the house, my room included

Amber: Are you serious?

Cosmo: It isn’t my room

Cosmo: just keep to sociable hours, why not

Cosmo: you said homework, not wild party

Amber: thanks

Amber: I’m almost as speechless as I was when you were telling me to leave

Cosmo: I know

Cosmo: I’m not saying I didn’t say some harsh things

Cosmo: It’s been weird but there’s no reason you can’t have somewhere quiet

Cosmo: and apart from me and him, no one really comes up to the first floor much

Amber: weirder than my usual daily life deserves every ⭐️ my dad has

Amber: and so do you, for this and everything else you’ve helped me with

Cosmo: Nah, it’s nothing

Cosmo: not my finest hour, actually

Cosmo: but it’s alright

Amber: it’s not nothing, it’s definitely something

Cosmo: We’re even

Cosmo: it wasn’t all ⭐️s so

Amber: plenty of it was

Cosmo: That don’t make it alright

Cosmo: I don’t make it a habit of being a fucking asshole, believe it or not

Amber: Neither do I

Amber: we’re even

Cosmo: 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

Amber: that’s a weird visual, thanks for it

Cosmo: You’re welcome for the artistic inspiration, like

Amber: if your idea is that your teammate bans me from matches too, there are gonna be easier ways than encouraging me to show up with 9 thumb shaped cardboard signs…

Cosmo: My theoretical teammate

Cosmo: That you ain’t gonna meet

Amber: Yes, him

Cosmo: 😏

Amber: The entire squad can’t all have pushy parents and intense girlfriends

Amber: ⚽⭐🏆🥂🤵

Cosmo: You’re doubling down on the whole stalker thing then, yeah

Amber: The positives speak for themselves

Cosmo: Maybe you’ll be offered a better place to do your homework

Amber: for when you’re spending your weekends in a better postcode and Dash’s room’ll have to be off-limits unless I make no noise and write my essays in the dark

Cosmo: Of course

Cosmo: unless you really wanna explain wtf you’re doing to my nan

Amber: Is the 🍊 thing real? To win over your friends, not your grandma, necessarily

Amber: I’d go for a different fruit in that case

Cosmo: It’s more of a thing when you’re a kid but it’s not not a thing

Cosmo: And fruit baskets too, very retro

Amber: okay, there’s my in

Amber: using the wonky ones would help my cause if we’re pretending to your nan I’m in that dire need of sanctuary, but find out her favourites, if she’s not gonna fall for the SOS

Cosmo: Would you rather not be incognito

Cosmo: She might think you’re Dash’s girlfriend or something

Amber: It wouldn’t take long to correct the assumption, but I only would if I had to, like, if she’s suddenly scared she’s living somewhere haunted

Cosmo: Wonky veg at the ready 👍

Amber: Always

Amber: but I’m actually excellent at hiding, which makes me sound how old? 3 maybe

Cosmo: It makes you sound deluded, definitely

Cosmo: I found you well easy

Amber: Because I wanted you to

Cosmo: Not me

Amber: yes you, Dash enters a room very differently, I knew it wasn’t him

Cosmo: You didn’t know me, you couldn’t want me to

Amber: You’ve heard of curiosity, right? I didn’t have to know you to want to find out who you were

Cosmo: I’ve not got 9 lives 🐈

Amber: that you know of

Cosmo: You think that’s a theory to test?

Amber: I’m not dangerous, remember

Cosmo: Allegedly

Amber: You can allegedly run away at the speed of light and even though you haven’t bragged about it, could probably also pick me up and throw me out 💪🏽⭐️

Cosmo: I’m not going to do that

Amber: I’m not a test

Cosmo: Debatable

Amber: Today’s events, maybe, but that isn’t what you should define me by

Cosmo: It’s okay, I won’t

Cosmo: we said we were even, I meant it

Amber: make your mind up on Saturday when I test your patience by trying on every dress I like and ask you what you think

Cosmo: That’s your prerogative

Cosmo: delegated to the bench with the other men

Amber: 🥼👖👟👓 I know you have the money to get a new outfit too because you were willing to give it to me twice

Cosmo: I might

Amber: I won’t tell you what I think if that’s what’s putting you off 😶

Cosmo: I think I can handle your fashion critiques 🤣

Amber: Because I don’t have any fashion sense or because yours is ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ and above criticism?

Cosmo: We have different styles

Cosmo: I’m not going to dress like a stoner, you’re not gonna dress like a WAG

Amber: Like a stoner? Really?

Cosmo: I went for the male and female equivalents

Cosmo: so you can’t pout

Amber: Yes I can, you’ve seen me in 1 outfit, which I wore to climb through a window

Cosmo: And I ain’t said nothing bad about it

Amber: there’s nothing complimentary in the tone of us having different styles when you follow it up with I’m not gonna dress like you

Cosmo: Are you going to get your own footie strip? No

Cosmo: It wasn’t an insult, not towards you

Amber: If they weren’t ridiculously expensive, I would, if only because it would annoy you now

Cosmo: Now that sounds 👶

Amber: it’d be worth it to see your face

Cosmo: 🙄😏

Amber: Besides, we’re the same age, I don’t have anything to prove

Cosmo: Am I a test?

Amber: you’re a boy I wanna know, it’d put me to the test if you hadn’t said no already

Cosmo: Somehow I doubt that’s ever been a challenge for you

Amber: I don’t see it as a challenge, no means no, and if you change your own mind, it means you’re open to it and there’s no obstacles to get over

Cosmo: A PC response but a fair one

Amber: I can’t complain when boys take my no for a maybe if I do the same, and I don’t like it, so keeping my mouth shut would be hard

Cosmo: Your mind just jumps to some weird places

Cosmo: I just said we’d make no sense as friends

Amber: That’s your mind leapfrogging to the strangest possible place

Amber: thinking all your friends have to be like you

Cosmo: It’s easier

Cosmo: like you and your school friends, you already put your foot in it

Cosmo: that doesn’t happen when you’re the same

Amber: Nothing happens when you’re the same, nothing ever changes

Cosmo: You want things to change for you, it makes sense for you

Amber: why don’t you?

Cosmo: Why would I?

Cosmo: I’m set up in ways people would kill for

Amber: Why wouldn’t you, even if you love everything that’s happening in your life right now, change can still be good

Cosmo: I’m not anti change

Cosmo: as long as it’s in the right direction

Amber: and I’m the wrong direction?

Cosmo: No, you’re like

Cosmo: a completely different path

Cosmo: we run parallel

Amber: I’m not gonna force you down any paths

Cosmo: I know

Cosmo: and I know it’s rude

Cosmo: but it’d be ruder to waste your time, I think

Cosmo: and I don’t want to do that

Amber: What do you wanna do?

Cosmo: I don’t know

Amber: I can go by myself on Saturday, to make things easier

Cosmo: There’s no need

Cosmo: It’s not like we need to be besties to do that

Amber: besties

Amber: maybe if we were 👶🏽

Cosmo: Well exactly, you get my point

Cosmo: we can just

Cosmo: be aware of each other

Amber: Thanks for not asking me to become unaware of you

Cosmo: Be unfair of me to ask when I won’t

Amber: and when you hate when I pout

Cosmo: That too

Amber: you’d especially hate being at school with me, pouting’s all I do

Cosmo: I thought you liked it? 🤓

Amber: I like learning new things, but not how many new things there are that I have to, what feels like all the time

Amber: progress doesn’t just apply to fitness, I wanna see some with this

Cosmo: That’s understandable

Cosmo: It’s a lot, leavers cert

Cosmo: Do you get any help or whatever?

Amber: Extra work whenever I ask for it, but none of the teachers are expecting me to still be here by the time we take exams, which means I’m another school’s problem or success story, and that could be a different country, so they aren’t gonna work hard to get me through leavers cert, are they?

Cosmo: No, I guess not

Cosmo: They should but you’re right they probably won’t

Cosmo: Do you think you’ll be here?

Amber: No, we’ve been here for months already

Cosmo: If you was leaving you’d be gone already, like

Cosmo: Maybe get another student to tutor you

Cosmo: they’re better than teachers ‘cos they’ll let you know what you actually need to know to do well on the tests

Amber: We’re not leaving while my parents are happy and feel needed but nobody at the commune wants summer schooling and my dad will get restless

Amber: but that’s a good idea while I am, I’ll find someone

Cosmo: I’m not smart enough or I would

Cosmo: I just did what I had to to coast by but it’s not the focus

Amber: You don’t have the time, boy

Cosmo: True

Cosmo: Speaking of

Amber: Oh sorry! 🤓 rant over

Cosmo: You’re alright, I need to actually get a decent workout in now though or it doesn’t really count

Cosmo: Saturday though, yeah

Amber: I’ll be at the phonebox at [just before whatever time he said]

Cosmo: 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

Cosmo: You’ll remember what I look like and not get in a random car, right?

Amber: I’m not a goldfish

Amber: and if I did forget I’d stalk your 🏋🏽📷

Cosmo: Oh right, I forgot you were a dedicated creeper

Amber: I wouldn’t be 😠 if you did

Cosmo: Too bad 😏

Amber: goodbye x 9

Cosmo: 👋

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ilovejesustoo · 4 years ago

Text

It’s only “SEX” and "What can this person do for me"

I think this will be the last time I write about dating. It’s only my second time, and post, but I think I am done. The idea of basing a life only on dating or women sounds dumb. It’s also Ungodly. I’m most likely going to live 50 more years on this planet and the idea that relationships, even though not a big part of my life currently, will continue to occupy my mind and all my focus is dumb. I have dreams outside woman.

But in the mean time I would like to talk about Dating Couches. For a while now my free time has be preoccupied on these guys. I can’t help it. Maybe it’s autism. I don’t know. I haven’t been tested. And even if I did would it make a difference at this point in my life. I won’t kill me like cancer and there is no cure so who cares?

I lot of the advise they give “seems” wrong. I won’t know because of the lack of dating thing. But it is for sure Ungodly. Also sexist.

But my main issue is the advice seems to be only for a certain people of male looking for a certain type of female. These would be the clubbing hopping males going after the club hopping females. Everything from the clothes they wear to the way they speak screams this fact.

Where is the advice for guys and girls for like punk rock. People who like to skateboard. The book worms and writers? The one who would rather spend a night at the theater. The hipsters and fashionistas? The hippies and folks. The immigrants and the church goers. The people of think different (Apple computer users pre 2000s)?

How can you call yourself and expert in a field you choose to ignore a large percentage of the population?

This annoys me.

The sexism also annoys me. The blanket statements about both sexes. How everyone, Including the women they talk to, treat the opposite sex like an object. Like a marriage or relationship is nothing more than a contract that is temporary and will end in heartbreak. No one speaks of “Love” or “Loving” each other. It’s only “SEX” and what can this person do for me.

No one also seems to be honest. Everything is a front and a facade. A basic construct that people only use tell they get what they want. And the worst part is both parties are lying and the both know this.

Maybe I should be glad God made me an Incel. But I think the correct term in my case would be a Forever Alone.

#dating #incel #christianity

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purplebenjy · 6 years ago

Text

1998

For the second time in his life, Benjy Fenwick had just been dumped. And it still sucked.

What had happened with Ollie had been as close to amiable as break ups could be, but what happened with Lisa cut deep.

“I’m breaking up with you.”

She’d said this against his lips when his hands were under her shirt. He’d laughed, thinking she was joking because she didn’t like what he was doing, but when Lisa had pulled away fully, Benjy had stopped laughing. He redid his pants and sat up in his back seat of the Honda Civic his brothers all pooled together to buy him for his sixteenth.

“Uh, okay? Why?”

Lisa had shrugged and fixed her blouse.

“I’ve got a crush on someone else.”

Jealousy had bloomed in his chest by then and Benjy felt his jaw twitch when he spat out the word “who?”

Lisa fished a pack of cigarettes out of the front pocket of her jeans and lit up. Annoyed, Benjy leaned over her and rolled down the window.

“Does it matter?”

Benjy sucks on his bottom lip for a second.

“What’s he got that I don’t?”

It was pathetic and he knew it, but he was blindsided. He thought things were going good. Not great, but good. Lisa was hot with long blonde hair and good tits. Not great, but good. She liked the same bands as he did, always dated skateboarders and tried to look like Courtney Love. She’d taken one of his flannels and hadn’t given it back and sometimes she blew him in his car after they went to the movies. It wasn’t love, but he was having a good time with her. He liked her a whole lot and she gave him attention and clout among his friends. He figured they’d at least go to prom together in a few months. Benjy watched as she shifted a little in her seat, ashed her cigarette out the window.

“He’s just different, Benjy. I don’t know.”

“Different how?” He tried to keep his voice level, but it still cracked. He reached for her hand but she pulled away.

“You’re a little uh....gay.”

He stared at her as she turned her face to look out the window.

“Groovy.” Benjy muttered, before sliding up and over the center console and into the driver’s seat. He punched the radio off, cutting Cheryl Crow off mid song. They sat in silence, the only sound Benjy’s exhaust. He pulled up in front of Lisa’s house and his brakes screeched as he parked.

“Benjy...” He flicked his eyes up to the backseat to look at her.

“It’s nothing personal.”

Before he could even say anything, she slid out of his back seat and was gone. This sentence has been haunting him ever since. It’s been two days and today when he saw her after fifth period, she was sucking face with that asshole named Trent.

Benjy doesn’t quite remember what happened after that, just Trent’s fist in his face and now his lip is swelling up. He cut the rest of the day and now he was here in the skatepark, trying and failing to try the new kind of flip he’d been practicing for weeks.

“It’s nothing personal.”

“Shit-“

He falls hard on his back, his board going up the half pipe and then falling back down to hit him in the ribs. As he slowly gets up, Benjy decides one thing;

It’s time to make it personal.

It starts out innocent enough, a couple cans on spray paint that he finds on clearance at the hardware store. Finding Asshole Trent’s car is easy too, he’s got a racing stripe on a fucking Jeep. He’s a surfer instead of a skater if the stupid board on the top of his stupid car is any stupid indication. Benjy doesn’t stalk them per se, just follows them to the beach. And waits in his own car until they run off into the waves. And pulls his sweatshirt tight around his face when he runs out of his car, low to the ground, doing a somersault partially to cover more distance but also cause it’s fun. He stands out wildly at the beach, and when he glances around, he sees a mother start to pull her two children in the opposite direction, glaring at him. Benjy snorts out his first laugh in two days and shakes the spray paint can, spraying the day-glo orange over the white Jeep with its stupid green racing stripe;

“Nothing personal.”

Trent’s stupid car, now complete with Benjy’s new tag, was the talk of the school. Most people were able to figure out it was him, but no one beyond Lisa and her new surfer girl aesthetic seemed to care. Benjy had a new hobby. The nothing personal tag started showing up all over his high school campus and around town, usually in whatever color was on clearance that week.

Suki was taking on extra kids during the day as a pseudo daycare so she didn’t have the time to notice that Benjy was late nearly every day thanks to either detention or running around, tagging the town. She didn’t notice, not at all, until he got a ride home in the back of a police cruiser.

All he was trying to do was to tag “nothing personal” on a wall on the side of an alley, when he’d gotten spotted. He’d stopped wearing the hoodie, mostly cause it was warming up but also cause it kept fucking with his hair-naturally that would be his downfall. Benjy’d been so good at out running the cops, so good at climbing trees and dirt mounds and sides of buildings to get away, but the bane of his existence, of course, was a chain link fence. The cop had basically picked him off the links like an apple and had detained him easily, pushing Benjy up against the fence after he’d pulled him down in a way he didn’t totally hate after he’d noticed how built the cop’s arms were. Pissed at himself for getting caught and at this strangely hot cop for catching him, Benjy refused to tell him anything, which resulted in a very confusing search for his wallet after he’d been handcuffed. The cop marched Benjy back to his squad car and all but thrown him inside. He hears the cop call in his name to the radio, reading it off of his driver’s license. He hears something he can’t quite make out and from his spot in the backseat through the bars, he sees hot cop balk.

“Are you sure?”

“Affirmative.”

The car’s engine flips over.

“Where do you live, kid?”

“Get fucked.”

Hot Cop mumbles something and his car squawks once as he starts to back up. And now Benjy still sat there, in the backseat with the bracelets digging into his wrists as the cop talks to his mom. Benjy hears the sound of another car pull up behind them and he twists around just in time to see the person get out of the car. And when Benjy sees who it is, fear shoots through him for the first time that afternoon.

It’s Alastor Moody, his dad’s old partner. He’s not in uniform like the hot cop, instead he’s in a pretty nice suit. When Al looks into the window, Benjy shrinks back into the seat. He watches him as he speaks to the other officer, who then nods and gets into the car Moody showed up in. He twists back around and something tugs at his chest when he watches his mom wipe at her face, obviously upset. He didn’t get why this had to be a big deal, it was just a stupid wall. He wasn’t hurting anyone, if anything he was making a boring thing look better. He sits up straighter now, his argument formed, but it dies in his throat when Al opens the driver side door and wordlessly starts the car. Benjy waits for him to say something, anything. For him to start yelling at him, tell him he’s a disappointment, a delinquent, anything. But nothing. Just silence. Especially when Moody punches off the radio.

“Are you going to read me my rights or what, old man?”

He’s trying to goad him, and it works. Kind of. Moody quietly rolls into a stop and glances up at him in the review mirror.

“You’re not under arrest.”

Somehow this makes Benjy more uneasy. He tugs at the handcuffs, making them clink.

“Then can you take these off?”

“Nope.”

Benjy grunts and props himself up against the door, chin on the windowsill, as much as he can be to be out of view of Al.

They drive for what feels like half an hour, but is probably ten more minutes, getting further out of the middle of town.

“Al?”

“So it’s Al now, not old man?”

“....are you going to kill me?”

Alastor chuckles darkly.

“Probably not.”

“Do you have your gun on you?”

“Do you need me to answer that?”

“Shit.”

He hears Moody chuckle again, and before Benjy knows it, they’re on the Golden Gate Bridge, driving out of the city completely.

“Are you taking me to military school?”

“Shut up, Benjy.”

He does, the events of the past few weeks playing in his head. Lisa. The tag. “You’re a little uh...gay.” Nothing personal. His mom crying. His spray paint covered hands forced behind his back right this moment.

“Al?”

“You’re really bad at following directions.”

“Do I seem too gay to you?”

The eyes that flick back towards him at the next stop light are confused now.

“Are you gay?”

“No.”

“But you....”

“You can be with guys and not be gay.”

“Okay okay, bite my head off. I’m trying to learn. So what’s seeming ‘too gay?’”

Benjy shrugs as best as he can.

“I dunno. Like I’m not masculine enough or something. Fucked up and wrong. Weird or girly or something-“

“There’s nothing wrong with you.” Al says forcibly, before hitting his turn signal and exiting the freeway they were now on. “Well I mean, you’re a degenerate-“

“And artist-“

“-but other than that. Nothing. Got it?”

“Yeah.” Benjy sits up properly now, not totally believing him. They’re quiet again, but it’s not the scary quiet from before, it’s different. Loaded. Benjy waits a few more minutes before he breaks it.

“Are you mad at me?”

“Yes.”

“....did I uh, say sorry about that yet?”

Moody pulls over, getting out of the car and sliding into the backseat beside Benjy. He undoes the handcuffs and clips them to his belt.

“I’m not the one you need to be sorry to, Benj.”

“Well is someone else gonna come and kidnap me so I can apologize to them-I’ll shut up now.” He cuts himself off based on Moody’s look. “Who do I need to be sorry to? My mom?”

Moody sighs and gets out of the car, walking around the front to open the other door.

“Get out. Do you know where we are?”

“Uh...” He looks around, seeing older kids with backpacks, some on bikes and skateboards. Someone’s playing guitar on a bench. “Somewhere with hippies?”

Moody chuckles, ushering Benjy to the sidewalk.

“You’re not wrong. This is UC Berkeley, Benj. Your art teacher thinks you’re good enough to get in here if you keep going in the way you’ve been. And I mean, I don’t know nothing about nothing but from what I’ve seen, I don’t think you’re too shabby either . But you know who they don’t let in?”

It clicks as Moody stares him down.

“.....I’m guessing people with arrest records?”

Moody claps him on the shoulder.

“Bingo. I’m not ever gonna bail you out like this again, kid. I did this for your mom and your dad, yeah, but uh...I mostly did it for you. This looks a lot better to me than prison but...”

Moody shrugs.

“If you wanna throw away something great, that’s your choice. But if you do, the only person you’ll need to say sorry to is yourself.”

Moody lets go of his shoulder and gets in the car. Benjy stares at campus, the ideas Moody planted wiggling around in his brain. He could get in here? People thought he was good enough? He looks a little closer at the people sitting on the grass. They’re dressed a little strange, loose clothes and long hair and just...different. Like him.

He turns to the police cruiser window, hitting it with his knuckles until Moody cracks it.

“Are you sure there’s nothing wrong with me?”

“Other than too much energy and a bad haircut? No.”

“Rude.” Benjy fails to hide his smile in a scowl. His smile grows as he looks at campus. It looks a lot more fun than prison; or even just regular old high school. A strange thrill shoots through him when he notices one of the students on the grass is laying on the lap of another boy. They’re talking about something and the boy laying down laughs before reaching up to tuck a piece of hair behind his boyfriend’s ear. Someone whizzes past him on roller skates and breaks the moment. Benjy turns back to the car window.

“Can I get a ride home?”

Moody takes a sip from his travel mug.

“Only if it’s in the back seat.”

Benjy groans.

“Seriously?”

“Seriously. Oh, and your mom told me to tell you you’re super grounded.”

“I figured.” Benj says with a shrug of his own as he casually opens the back door of the cop car and throws the few people across the street giving him strange looks a grin and a wave as he hops in.

“You keep the meter running?”

“I can still arrest you.”

Benjy laughs, suddenly a lot lighter. He sits on the side closest to campus so he can look at for as long as possible as Moody drives away.

“Al?”

“Yeah?”

Benjy leans forward as close to him as he can, face pressed up against the bars.

“Thanks.”

Al just nods, turning on FM radio.

“Don’t fuck it up.”

Benjy settles back in his seat, fingers twitching as he already wants to get home and sketch, suddenly much more motivated. He’s hoping he’s not grounded from that. He wants to get home and apologize, maybe even grovel and try to make it up to his mom. Unfortunately, right before they get to the bridge, they hit rush hour traffic. Benjy shifts in his seat, pressing his face against the bars again.

“Can you turn on the siren?”

“Nope.”

“Pussy.”

It might be a trick of the light, but he swears he sees Moody smile.

#drabble #moody #suki

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sawyersscribbles · 6 years ago

Note

Hell I would like every single headcanon for Reagan because i saw she'd just eat an entire thing of sour cream and now i'm just curious about this weird sour-cream-eating creature

sbhfnjkn she absolutely would and i’m gonna find a way to sneak that into the canon if it kills me. But Reagan is such a good choice, thanks for the ask! And sorry this took me a bit to get back, I’ve been thinking about this for days

1. Holiday headcanon

Reagan grew up in Colorado, so she feels really connected to forests and mountains, so she and her family always go on a Christmas hike up a mountain and decorate a wild tree for Christmas because they don’t really like cutting them down and feel like a plastic tree is too fake. that damn hippie Hart family

2. Cooking headcanon

Her favorite food is cream of corn which I ABSOLUTELY HATE because it’s all slimy and sweet and fjlnekrgaljkfn but whatever, she makes her own rules. Her preferred method of eating it is putting the can over the fire and drinking it like soup. What the literal hell. Why is she like this.

3. Sleeping headcanon

Reagan usually refuses to sleep because “the night is when all the fun shit happens” or something so her best friend Ingrid sometimes puts sleeping pills in her milkshakes so she can take a god damn nap which is honestly what I’d do if I was Ingrid

4. Driving headcanon

I think I’ve mentioned this once before, but Reagan has crashed a total of six cars in her lifetime. Three times it was her parents’ car, once was her own car that she and her mother fixed up, and then two other times after the invaders came and Reagan hijacked abandoned cars on the road

5. Bathing/showering headcanon

Reagan is definitely the type who says she hates showers and baths but the second she gets into one she’s like “mmmm srgjnlwergjk warm woter” and then won’t leave for hours. She loves the water BOILING hot though so be sure not to touch any metal in a building where Reagan’s showering

6. Hugging headcanon

Reagan loves to do that “bro hug” thing where you clap your hand into the other person’s and then bring it in kind of? Not to @ any voltron lovers (#sheith for the win btw) but this is what I mean:

7. Kissing headcanon

I’ve never written a character with more Top Energy™ in my life, so Reagan usually goes all out if she’s making out, as in she’ll wrap you up and hold you close and will throw as much passion at you as you’ll let her. She also has a thing for getting kissed behind the ear but she hates people knowing that o.o

8. Sex headcanon

As mentioned before, intense Top Energy™ over there. She also has a track record of spending… nights… with the daughters of authority figures because she has an Authority Problem so for example, after getting arrested for reckless driving, in retaliation Reagan had a fling with the daughter of the police chief who arrested her for about a month afterwards ;)

9. General physical contact headcanon

Reagan has this ability to make usually normal acts of physical contact really intimate. She doesn’t show affection as much through hand holding or hugging, but if you make a secret handshake with her, that’s how you know you’re on her good side

10. Physical appearance headcanon

Reagan has tan skin and dark eyes and starts the novel with long hair, but shaves it off at the beginning of the book (a way I measure time in SOS is noting how long Reagan’s hair is, since it represents the passing of time as it grows longer). Her body is also riddled with various scars from when she’s gotten into dirt bike accidents or got shot, and she’s very proud of each one

11. Wardrobe headcanon

Since she’s in the desert and also a lesbian, her main clothing of choice is a pair of cargo pants, some sort of tank top, usually gray or white, a flannel wrapped around her waist, and a snapback hat. Basically the sk8r boy look, even though she doesn’t know how to skateboard

12. Jewelery headcanon

She doesn’t wear a lot of jewelry but is often seen with botched piercing jobs like “haha I lit a safety pin over the fire and just had at it. Do you think it looks cool?”

13. Nickname headcanon

Reagan despises her name because her parents gave it to her after the American president, so she sometimes likes to go by “Ray”, but she still appreciates that it’s unique, so most people usually call her by her full name

14. Dancing headcanon

If I had my way, I’d totally put Reagan in an 80s AU where she’s a hip hop dncer. I feel like I can totally picture her spinning on the floor and jamming out to some intense base somewhere, so she definitely goes hard

15. Singing headcanon

While she isn’t that good at singing, Reagan is a mean karaoke participant. It might just be her flare for the dramatic, but she’ll climb on tables, use beer bottles as prop microphones, and do rock n’ roll slides if she’s really feeling the song

16. Anger headcanon

Her parents didn’t teach Reagan much as a teenager, but the one thing they instilled in her as a child was, “if you’re mad, take five minutes and walk away”. Whenever she’s frustrated, she would just close her eyes and breathe, and then find the nearest exit for a walk before she does something rash

17. Soft spot headcanon

The one constant in Reagan’s life for years has been her cat Ozzy, and she loves him more than she loves herself (which isn’t a super high bar). She doesn’t always hit it off well with people, so she’s found a lot of comfort in having Ozzy around and would be devastated if something happened to him

18. Favorite possession headcanon

This actually isn’t a headcanon, it’s just canon canon, because a little while ago I wrote a scene where we see Reagan’s most prized possession, which is a polaroid photo of her and her older brother on their last hike together before he went off to college with writing at the bottom that said, “We survived! See you soon, little sis :)”. Would you believe me if I said she never saw him again?

19. Favorite photograph headcanon

See above! :)

20. Relationship with/thoughts on Anais headcanon

I actually wanted to pick Anais for this because the more I think about the two of them as characters, the more I think they’re foils for each other. Reagan is brash and loves fun and partying and letting herself go and throwing herself in harm’s way for others, and isn’t afraid to speak her mind on what she thinks is right. Anais, on the other hand, is her opposite. She has a lot of things to say, a lot of which are good ideas, but usually keeps them close out of fear of rejection. She seeks comfort in close friends who she can deeply trusts, and actually doesn’t like Reagan at all at the beginning of the book, so their relationship as two members of a group traveling across the country together is something I’m really excited to explore

Thanks so much for this ask, Ellie!! This was so much fun to put together!

#asks #thespooniewrites #ellie 2.0

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creatiview · 2 years ago

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fridaynightbordercrossing · 6 years ago

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An interview with Mercado Negro

Mercado Negro, the duo integrated by brothers Martín (guitarist) and Jesús Hernández (drummer/singer), is one of the important groups in the rebirth of the 80's music scene, as well as pioneers in playing punk rock on the border. In this interview, they talk about these issues, as well as their present and several of their projects, here is the interview.

THE ROOTS...

"Martín and Jesús come from a family of musicians. Our grandfather was a troubadour for the decades of the forties and fifties, promoter also because he promoted the trio in which he participated with Pedro Vargas (later, one of the most important Mexican artists of all time) and the first artistic caravans that came to Tijuana. From there, came another legacy, we are nephews of the legendary guitarist Lupillo Barajas, who was part of Manolo y sus Cuatro Latinos and later formed part of a very successful group, Los Tijuana Five, which was very important not only in the region but at the national level. They came out in magazines and had shows in hotels and concerts like any artist of international stature, that heritage we have. We were fortunate to grow in a 100 percent rock and roll environment. As children, we came to this building, on the second floor, where our uncles had their rehearsals"

"We had seen all the start in the Fiestas Patrias, saw everything how was done in the culture of the sixties. We were about 6 or 7 years old, we saw all that, the image of musicians with long hair and beards, but also understanding their art. We also saw this in the ballroom that my grandmother had, which was La Cueva, an artistic concept, not just a ballroom, it had paintings on the walls, so then, who was not going impact that contact with the musicians?...we watched the rehearsals, the instruments. Since I was a child I played here in this studio, there was a piano in a corner, so there was contact with musicians and painters ".

1977: THE END OF A ROCKERA ERA

"There are four aspects that determined the death of the generation of the golden era in Tijuana, I am marking it very objectively in a research work I am doing. The first aspect is that the city grew because there was a national call for people from all over Mexico to come to work, since in the seventies it was the boom of the maquiladora industry, so people came from the most remote states, as well as the closest. These people came for the offer of government, so they came to live and work with everything and their families, people who came from Chiapas, Yucatan, Veracruz, and Jalisco. They came from towns and cities that brought their well-rooted culture, so there was a multiethnic mix of all cultures, They started looking for music and entertainment that they were used to in their city, that was a factor. We began to see more Tijuana residents who had their taste for mariachi, cumbia, merengue, bolero and romantic, we began to see a demand for that music. Let's emphasize that in the sixties, Tijuana was a rock city".

"The other aspect was that San Diego began to be profitable because it was the time of superstars and super concerts. The sixties were of the "rockstars", but in the seventies, change to the "superstars", emerging the great phenomena of music like Kiss, who made great concerts in stadiums and arenas, when formerly they were in clubs, bars and places of medium capacity. The Tijuanenses began to go to concerts for the first time in 1977. That was a very important year because Led Zeppelin came, Black Sabbath with Van Halen opening, Rolling Stones, Yes, and Tomita, then it was a boom, including that there was not so much difficulty crossing the line and the economy was different, Hell, a ticket could be paid for 10 dollars and up to 45 dollars, then it was a new modality for Tijuana residents to go to San Diego".

"Another factor was that artists who had a well-known national reputation in the city, popular artists like Vicente Fernandez, Rigo Tovar, El Mariachi Vargas, and Banda El Recodo, became superstars and idols thanks to that migration, which was people who sought their identity. Finally, another determining factor was the disco music, because Avenida Revolución, which was the most prominent place for the musicians to develop, change their ways, since for clubs it was more profitable to buy a jukebox and have a DJ with their turntables, than to pay some musicians, since it was the salary of two bands. There was live music 24 hours a day, seven days a week as in the case of Mike's. When the generation of DJs was born, they earned more than a whole group, so, from 1977, live rock and Tijuana's generation of musicians came to an end, only very few of them survived, among them, La Cruz".

THE ROCK PUNK ARRIVES

"By 1977, we were already skating and, through skateboarding, we began to see the magazines, it was something new and fresh in Tijuana, it had to do with an attitude in rebellion. It was not the same to go skateboarding or to play basketball in the skating centers that were in fashion, that made us identify with punk since rock had become hard rock and fashion, it did not fit with the youth of Tijuana. Skateboarding and surfing practically led us to decide as young people to go along that path. There was a kind of disenchantment, a divorce or distancing between the public and the superstars, it became a division in which it was impossible to have access to rock music".

"People who wanted to be a musician wanted to maintain the spirit or nostalgia of the rebellious movements of the late fifties, when the countercultural movement or the rock and roll with Elvis Presley emerged, which was something with more contact. Now, that was something impossible. Kiss was Kiss, all the superstars were inaccessible things, there was now a generation that did not care about all that, and started with "I want to be a musician and I do not care about looking like Queen or like Elton John, I want to manifest myself ", and that, was linked well with our way of living and with our reality. Apart from that, for us, it was an absurd thing watching six-minute instrumental solos, high heels and painted musicians. That was not accessible to a tijuanense and as a youth, we grew watching hippies, psychedelia and peace and love".

"We saw a radical and countercultural wave that fought for Vietnam, we did not understand it, but we saw that generation, our uncles were there and we came to see that transformation. At this point, watching the platform shoes and pants below the waist, for us without being punks, it was like watching clowns, with 10 minutes of drum solo and 20 of keyboard solo and opera voices, we felt that as decadent, I could not be liking that. We had from San Diego two stations, KGB that was rock music and KCBQ that was country and ballads, both started to like in Tijuana and we did not like it, that did not satisfy us. When we started listening to punk rock, we got excited, we said: "we are for this". It was the simplicity of being able to reach and be able to identify with a skateboard, you identified with a group, and it was accessible".

"This is how we were fully identified with this new refreshing musical movement, since with it comes the birth of groups like Ramones and The Sex Pistols, in addition to the ones that emerged afterward like The Stranglers and Dead Kennedys, which emerge with a very primitive and basic musical proposal, as in its beginning was rock, as in the sixties it was with The Who, Rolling Stones and The Beatles. Once again, in the late seventies, a new proposal was emerging that returned to its roots, with that rebelliousness, but at the same time, with a more energetic freshness. It was a movement antagonistic to everything that made us decadent and that was gradually evolving both in the intellectual and ideological concept. In the musical concept, it is very important to get across the point that The Clash releases the Sandinista album, a triple album that had a lot of roots of what would later evolve into a lot of influences of the Rock En Tu Idioma movement".

"That musical evolution was also very good because that's where new wave also came from. At the time, there were the super keyboardists of Yes and all that movement, apart from the techno, that made us not like the keyboards, but all the technology was developed to an impressive level and the synthesizer guitar, keyboards, and sequencers began to be used. The look of the bands broke with what was established, a whole Hollywood movement is made with punk hairstyles, taking into account that some said that this was going to be dead, it was predicted for a lifespan of four years. In addition, by way of mockery, it was said thatanybody could do a group on a snap"

PIONEERING

"From 1977 to 1981 there was an absence of live music here in the city, an almost total absence because the only survivors were (hard rockers) La Cruz and a progressive rock band called Camaleón. By 77, La Cruz began to tour to Sonora, to Baja California Sur, even to Sinaloa, they began to open their own circuit. In Camaleón, the Muzquiz Brothers participated (later, integrating punk rock band Los Negativos), they did it for love of the music more than for having a constancy, their concerts were very sporadic, and since they were wealthy people, they did it out of love for art. For 1981, as lovers of rock music and live concerts, we decided to make our own music, very motivated because hardcore music was having a boom in California, since the first and the best groups arose there, like Dead Kennedys, TSOL, White China, Black Flag, and Circle Jerks, we had all that influence and we went to the concerts in Fairmont Hall. Suddenly, we could not go for the interracial fights. We decided that if we could no longer see the groups, then someone has to play, we have fever and hunger and so it was that to cover a basic need. Without projecting it, we fostered a new musical movement that had a very singular thing, that was that the first punk rock or rock groups from Tijuana had the very specific peculiarity of composing and interpreting their songs in Spanish. Let it be well marked and in capital letters, that Rock En Tu Idioma reached 1987 to Tijuana, but since 1981, six years before, we were already doing it".

"Since 1979 we tried to make a group, but we were very young and the older guys did not want to do it. In 1980, I made an event that has a lot to do with this, it was in the ETI 24 Alba Roja, from this school the first show comes out in 1980 with pure new wave and punk music, being the first high school to do something like that and that's where everything was turned on. Around 1981 we had already made several attempts to do something, but besides that we were very young, we did not have the resources, in fact, the youngest was the one who got the instruments to make the band, those who worked they did not make the effort, then, the youngest ones were who put everything together ".

"The peculiarity of the eighties, was that we segregated our own movement, we did our parties and we danced the pogo dance, which was popularized by the Ramones, it was a less violent dance with less physical contact. We were several, we were not limited, we were numerous, the gangs got together and that's how it grew. At a certain moment, the scene was very generous, we were lucky that the venues were open to us. We made events, hiring the salons, making the contracts, the formats from three months before to get the Seguro Social Theater. Booking the Calafornix Theater was a very simple thing, because apart, we were students, then, there was no difficulty to play in a CBTIS, Prepa Federal. That was in institutions and schools, not to mention the public places, and very different than now, they asked us if we wanted to play and even, offered to pay us".

"What was part of the punk rock attitude was to take for us the cultural institutions. In those days it was Mercado Negro in the Theater of the IMSS, the UABC or the Casa De La Cultura, it was because we took them, we went and they put a thousand and one obstacles, they made you sign a 90-day contract, you were responsible for this and the other, sign a series of ridiculous conditions. Actually, it was our dream to play there, to take those spaces as punk rockers. Now they have another vision, we respect them, but people say, "well, they have the government logo", but then we say that those institutions are really ours, they are public spaces for everyone".

ANTAGONISM

"You have to consider for that antagonism, that punk rock was not only music that the police wanted to repress, but also has an ideology that is countercultural and the cultural and artistic instances consider all cultural manifesto as part of art. It was also a whole concept involved, it was a counterpart where they said, "you dress in that way", yes, but it was a manifestation of art that has a philosophical and ideological content that deserves to be considered to participate in this type of instances, in this type of forums, they are obligated to have you for something, they could not avoid it, they could not take it from you away at all. We were part of those who fight for it, Luis Guereña was one who fought to open the UABC Theater not only for us, for the Tijuana residents beyond the punk rock movement. It was not only forbidden to play punk rock, but it was forbidden to play rock in those places, being punk rock the most radical, because the police and the system did not want us".

"They took the press so that the newspapers would cover the events. For example, there were two sides of the press, one, which covers the scandal of some police officers that seize a punk kid that got beat up and raped, they banish him and he has to go to Los Angeles, that's the journalistic note with a sensationalistic side on the hardcore side. For the punk rock, the artistic one is done with stuff like the concert began ten seconds later, that there was a small crowd and that there was a yawn. You begin to be judged from the media, especially Zeta, in that way for being a local punk rock artist, a style was made with a review of that type, and that was applied to us. We come to "innovate" for that journalism that was made at the national level, that was most used for judging the big musicians. The punks arrived to innovate the culture of Tijuana at the journalistic level and equal to the level of police repression because they had no work. Before they used to beat up the cholos, then, the punks arrived and they changed their targets. The cholos breathed, but paradoxically the cholos ceased and the punks still are around. Now it is not like before, now you can walk all tattooed with piercings and purple hair, maybe they make fun of you. Now, if you walk in normal clothes they could target you because they see the possibility of taking out your money. There are now kindergartners bringing their mohawks and it is accepted in schools, they even look beautiful".

THE FIRST RECORD

"For the first album, we took off a year with several implications that would have been different if we had released it out on time. A single year at the artistic level is like about ten years. The musical careers of the young artists are very short, at least in the music industry, the companies sign you for five years and the representation companies give you short contracts. Losing a year artistically is losing a lot of ground, however, the expectation that was generated with respect to the presentation of the album it opened many doors, and motivated other Tijuana groups to look for the same. It remains a highmark for a whole generation".

THE SCENE

"By 1987, after a resurgence of the scene that had already begun in form, all the groups of Tijuana, without exception, began to visualize the music as an art, as a way to stand out and not only in the community but in a larger scale. There was a very serious attitude toward music, the musicians started to evolve because they began to act like professionals. All the groups charged money to promoters, but, with the offer, they were giving back their best effort. When you saw bands like Armagedón, you knew that you would go to see a very professional image and above all, enjoy a good musical performance with a nice sound and stage, it had the same level of quality as the shows in San Diego. You went and watched Elena Coker with very great musicians or a group like Mercado Negro and you got something really good to enjoy, because that was the ideology, a very serious and professional attitude towards music, to such a degree that the groups took possession of the cultural instances such as the CECUT and La Casa De La Cultura. The press and the media, when they looked at the bands, considered them very serious. That enriched the cultural scene and the new generations wanted to be like the bands on stage".

THE CONQUEST OF ROCK EN TU IDIOMA

"The decade of the eighties culminates with a conquest. Rock En Tu Idioma arrived, it began to infiltrate radio stations. The cultural and artistic promoters began to realize that there was a new movement that had implications with the new youth, so they were mixing it with the popular music of the adolescents. Around 1989, there are three big concerts, Soda Stereo in the Auditorium with the Doble Vida tour, Caifanes with the El Diablito tour and with La Negra Tomasa song and the Coca Cola tour with Mana, Fobia and Rostros Ocultos. These three concerts were a determining factor in what would follow, it shook the local scene, because the new generations of musicians who emerged in the late eighties and early nineties, had an identity crisis. The movement that was well enriched in Tijuana, but suddenly it had a mirage. They began to follow the rock proposed by the new record companies. They made you change the concept, breaking with all the identity of Tijuana. Many people went and started doing well, giving up their principles by grabbing something quick".

"That was a preamble to what would come in the nineties, which was a struggle of definitions and trends. On the one hand, there was the new musical current of grunge and all the ideology that was completely opposed to the ideology of do-it-yourself and imposes apathy, disinterest. On the other hand, Rock In Tu Idioma becomes too castrated, to say, without strength, without a message to the conscience. All that was a shock to the Tijuana movement and I imagine that happened in other border cities. By then Mercado Negro began to join the group of artists that we met and began to have links with painters, actors, poets, and musicians of other genres. We formed a community of propositive Tijuana artists and we began to do events together and it was a kind of coexistence with very interesting things that came up, suddenly you saw Mercado Negro on a theatrical performance. "

REJECTION

"In the eighties, we played a lot, once a week and we wore out. We started to play differently and to musicalize plays, movies, poems, to do electronic music. We played with some pads and synthesizers, we did other things. We left the circle of playing punk rock and hardcore, tired of the fights, the same concerts, the same crowd, and the same music. On the one hand, there was some kind of rejection, but on the other hand no. It's like the brothers, because here there were two very strong movements, It's like the big families, the two brothers are always fighting, always envious, always putting obstacles and competing, then the brother says, "You know, I'm leaving the house, because I can not stand it anymore and I'm always fighting with you, because You're my brother and I do not want to get to hate you, I'm leaving the house". You take the decision to leave the house and suddenly the brother who repudiated you and who competes so much, goes and cries and says "no, don't leave us". Something similar happened to us, when we took the path of expanding our horizons and fortify our link with other ramifications of art, we began to feel that kind of situation that you mention to us".

"Curious, a door was closed, but many more were opened. The rejection was always understandable, more like envy than a competition. The competition had ended because they were two different genres, very opposed, where the journalistic note was inclined to that, to that type of stuff, but we were proposing another level that you did not find in the other movement. To some extent it was like envy because you can not take as rejection being selected to the National Theater Showcase in Monterrey, hanging out with John Paul Jones of Led Zeppelin or playing at the CECUT Theater. I do not see it as rejection, but nevertheless, among the people, there was a certain admiration and recognition that they are there and we are here and we can not get there".

THE NINETIES: THE DECADE OF DARKNESS

"In the nineties, we stopped participating with the group of artists, as we began to expand and to experiment with jazz. We came to fall with my uncle Lupillo in a project called Pillos Trío, which subsequently, evolved to Guadalupe Barajas Jazz Quartet or the Jazz Quartet with some prestigious guests. With this quartet we had very good presentations, helped us to musically progress and evolve. Our contribution to rock music ceased to be fundamental since in that decade we were displaced, not just us, also Armagedón and La Cruz were in that sense, there was a blackout".

"A new stream of tijuanenses musicians emerged, they got involved in the system and it was time for bands like Tijuana NO! and Julieta Venegas who were successful and were prominent rock stars. It was a decade of darkness for the local bands, they imposed the system and took out the groups of the eighties that had experience. There were displaced by that rock "españolero" that was within the system. We did not want to fall into that and got involved in jazz and other things. We did not stop playing, but they were sporadic presentations, for example, we went to Mexico City with the concept of jazz and we also played punk rock, and the extra was that Lupillo Barajas played rock and roll with Mercado Negro, we made a big impression there, but it was only once, we should have done it more".

"Unfortunately the globalization of art, culture and politics and everything, caused that those who had a proposal became a product. In the decade of the nineties that change was created, it was a chemical soup that affected everything, the propositive artists became musical products, and just as the commercial food products have an expiration date, the musical products had their validity. The record companies started making contracts for five years and things like that. So, then, the only alternative to being able to survive was to continue playing, to continue expanding our horizons and it was that we fully entered jazz to be able to give it some validity. We made sporadic presentations of the Mercado Negro, maybe, once a year or twice. That's how we managed to survive that dark decade. We had good presentations, we were supported by jazz musicians and we presented something unattainable, that also counts a lot so that they do not take you seriously. While the others were very simple, we were proposing very radical things, so then, we did not enter there with them. It was good the idea to overcome you musically, but at the same time, you did not enter into the taste of the people either".

THE NEW MILLENNIUM

"In 1999 it was a year that put things in perspective, because everybody was with the idea that the world was going to end, and even Nostradamus becomes famous. The means of production become accessible and we set up this studio for recording and production. We produced groups and then, we decided to make our first CD entitled Sobreviviendo with four songs. We joined musicians of the nineties such as Alejandro Perales, Miguel Arce, and Jesús Laborin, we started to give continuity to the band, since we had the hope that the industry perspective would take a turn, we allowed ourselves to give another try. Later, some people came from Los Angeles with a project called Mexamerica, where musicians from the old school of Latin and Chicano rock like Willy Herron and Los Illegals, Jesús Martínez and others invited us to record. We make this record, where also other musicians from Tijuana were involved. It was presented in the city of Los Angeles and with a lot of good vibe, we continue to play live".

"In 2002, two very important things happened. Luis Guereña, who was the promoter of the punk rock scene and who subsequently formed part of Chantaje and now played with Tijuana NO!, leaves this band for ideological reasons. In that same year, Joe Strummer, leader of The Clash dies. We think of doing homage in remembrance with musicians of Tijuana NO! who were with the project vacated, since Cecilia Bastida and Luis Guereña were the protagonists of that project. Alejandro Zúñiga and Jorge Jiménez were in recess, we have an approach and together, we decided to do the Joe Strummer tribute project. We started to make a series of presentations and amalgamate, there is chemistry. Then, I proposed to do a project where it has nothing to do with any of the two bands, and in fact, we did it, musicians from La Borrasca like Cesar Ortega and Miguel Arce joined us. It was a project of six musicians, unfortunately, when we were about to record and do things more seriously, the project imploded".

"For 2003, we were just Alejandro, Martín, Jesús and Jorge, it's the time when the proposal to tour Europe for Tijuana NO! came out, but Alejandro mentioned that the group was dismembered. Then he proposed that Mercado Negro should be part of this project that could be a collective of different players. We played music from Tijuana NO!, from Mercado Negro and from the tribute to Joe Strummer, that's how the European tour comes about, wherein a moment, musicians from Tijuana NO! play music from Mercado Negro and vice versa, it was a very interesting project. Returning, the rest of the invited musicians return to their own projects and we continue with the idea of a tribute to The Clash".

"Beginning in 2004, Luis Guereña dies too and the remainder of Tijuana NO! is reunited to make a posthumous tribute and we also participate in these events. By 2005, Tijuana NO! does a mini tour of Germany and we go our own way again. Mercado Negro continues rehearsing and suddenly, Jorge Jiménez visits us and starts playing music of the project he had with Luis Guereña, we accompany him jamming and he tells us, "let's make a project" and we tell him to let us present to the public the music of Luis Guereña, a totally new thing with the concept that he had of Tixuanarkia, that for questions of legal implications, we modified it to Agresores. Since it was a very own concept of Luis Guereña, we did not want to get involved in that kind of situations, that's why we named it Agresores, having a lifespan of almost four years, from 2004 to 2007. After Jorge Jiménez left the project, we still gave it some continuity to cover a series of commitments that we had already agreed upon. The project had a great impact, very professional, competitive at an international level. The musical evolution of Jorge Jiménez in this particular genre, with the support we gave him, could have been a very symbolic thing internationally, unfortunately, the project was lost ".

CONTINUING

"Since we are vocation musicians and since we have little more than thirty years playing, we have returned from 2008 to the present to continue with our project that is Black Market / Mercado Negro for the simple fact that we are what we are. We do not have the idea of wanting to go on MTV or something like that. Perhaps the age, sooner rather than later, will prevents us from giving continuity to the project, because when you get older, it's already a little out of context, but the music of Mercado Negro seeks to be focused on the conscience of the human being, we are not at a certain age for a certain genre or audience, we have always made timeless music, it is music that has no expiration".

XXX ANNIVERSARY

"The Tijuana Cultural Center and the Municipal Institute of Art and Culture sheltered the XXX Anniversary project, whose culmination will be a chronicle book that has the support of the Institute of Culture of Baja California. the book is called Cronicas Tixuarockeras and there is already a prototype. It is a project that is sponsored by a grant from the PEDCA Program and is the chronicle of the last forty years. This book is the chronicle from 1960 to 1999, where my brother Martin has a part very important, is the co-star".

"These same cultural instances sponsored some presentations in a project called Remembranzas Alternativas, with music that we heard from the late seventies to the eighties, combined with our music that has had very good acceptance. We have in mind to open a circuit where we also do some presentations where the perspective is bringing Black Market music to the city delegations, as we did in our origins, to the popular colonies, because it was something very particular that we did at the beginning. We also had a short tour in Mexico City called Producto Defectuoso, short, but very productive, there we made good contacts and had the opportunity to play with great legends of punk rock in Mexico City and the State of Mexico ".

(Interview conducted at MN Studios in May 2012)

UPDATE

Since the interview, Mercado Negro has gone back to their early punk rock roots, bringing back old band members that have been playing with them on many of their recent shows and jams. They restored La Cueva ballroom to do sessions with special guest bands, even, with a reunited Agresores, just for the pleasure of play music. In 2017, finally, Jesus released Cronicas Tixuarockeras, a book with a lot of awesome pictures from all their best moments performing and featuring a lot of cool stories from the start of the punk rock scene in Tijuana.

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