#bc im not just gonna go around telling everyone like 'hey i attempted sui last week im not holding it together very well'
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yknow i really hoped id bounce back quicker
#its almost been a week and i havent recovered#so im just a mess and failure out and about for everyone to see and laugh at behind my back#i havent had time to process anything i hsvent had time to recover. but who gives a shit genuiely#i should be doing better#but im barely holding it together#im barely keeping myself alive and functioning. i barely get up and barely eat. im behind on everything uni-related.#and everyone sees it everyone sees me failing at getting uni work done in time and theyre mocking and judging me behind my back#im 99% sure even my friends are#bc im not just gonna go around telling everyone like 'hey i attempted sui last week im not holding it together very well'#thatd be even worse. theyd hate me for seeking sympathy/attention.#but since noone knows they just think im lazy and stupid#and i cant fucking do this anymore i feel like im falling apart#vent#personal#suicide mention#sorry for vent on main again#im home alone for the past few (and next) days and its making me hold it together even worse
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