#because her workload was a bit too much to manage with everything

[royalarchivist]

Away from the computer so can't post clips from Jaiden's stream, but if someone else makes a good clip I'll reblog that.

[vanishingstarrs]

pancakes for dinner

katsuki bakugo x nurse reader, pro hero era, established relationship, just soft and pure vibes, down bad bakugo aka my boyfie fr, slight smut at the end, NSFW, minors DNI

( guysss i’ve been so sick and i’ve been suffering having to work still bc #hispanic we ain’t eva allowed to call out :(( i’ve been wanting to write please please please x bakugo but haven’t had the energy, meantime hope y’all enjoy this little ficlet <3 just wholesome mushy stuff for y’all but then it turned smutty at the end because why not lol also i’m pretty new to writing explicitly so pls lmk how it came out !! )

You were exhausted.

Mentally and physically.

Work had been a tad overwhelming lately, with extra things being piled onto your already heavy workload after a big merger between two of Japan’s biggest hospitals, which in turn caused a lot of people to be let go. Not only had it been stressful wondering whether you’d make the cut or not after a “re-interview”, but when you learned that you had been accepted you’d also been asked if you could take on a few extra duties.

You had never been one to back down from work, always taking initiative and being happy to help any one of your coworkers that might need it.

Lately though, it seemed every single person needed help. Your coworkers, your patients, and if it wasn’t those two then it was your boss asking if you could help her with management duties that had nothing to do with the extra work you’d been assigned to do on top of everything else.

You were sick and tired.

Your muscles cried out as you pushed your apartment door open and immediately kicked off your shoes, groaning as you bent down in order to place them onto the shoe stand. You were sure you heard your back crack as you stood straight once more to hang your purse and keys.

You didn’t bother unpacking the lunch you never got time to eat, leaving the bag you packed it in tied up and in the fridge before heading into your bedroom and immediately shedding your scrubs. You hated doing skincare, but thought about how dirty your face must be after dealing with so many patients and dragged yourself into the bathroom to get it over with.

By the time you were finished doing everything, your body was begging you to lay down for just a minute.

A little power nap never hurt, you told yourself as you fell onto your bed face first and sighed. You hugged your pillow to your aching body and allowed yourself to relax for just a little while.

Though “a minute” quickly turned into three hours as the sun went down and the night sky pulled you further into dreamland.

You didn’t hear the front door open or close, you didn’t stir when your boyfriend started removing his hero equipment, much less wake when those heavy gauntlets he somehow wore all day hit the floor or when his pounding footsteps carried across the hardwood as he made his way to your shared bedroom to check on you.

You missed the brief smirk on his face as he found you lying on his side of the bed, on your right side with a leg propped up for comfort.

Katsuki knew how hard you’d been working lately with the merger between the two hospitals and how stressed it made you. With him working as a hero, he encountered many people that wound up needing to go to the hospital. On top of that, you also had all the other sick people that hadn’t been involved in some villain attack. You likely dealt and saved more people in a single day than he did in a month, he knew this, he was proud of the fact, actually, and incredibly proud of you.

He was damn lucky to have you.

And for all these reasons, he was happy to see you rest for a bit.

He’d often come home late and find that you’d already done all the cleaning around the house, as well as meal prep for both you and him, and still found the time to bake desert on top of making him dinner. You went above and beyond in all aspects of your life, often even calling and checking up on his parents when he hadn’t done so in too long. He’d receive texts from his mother scolding him and making sure he was taking good care of you the way she knew you did him, he swore you were the favorite and he understood why you were.

Everyone loved you.

He adored you.

Except he hadn’t been doing his part as well as he should be lately.

And so, while you slept, he quietly changed into some loungewear before carefully shutting the bedroom door closed behind him.

He tried his hardest to be quiet as he went around cleaning up throughout the house, he swept, he steam mopped the floors (and prayed he didn’t miss a spot), he did your laundry, took your work shoes and scrubbed them clean for your next workday, he took your old lunch and tossed it out before setting to work on preparing you something delicious for tomorrow.

Being in the kitchen was actually soothing for him, he liked being able to experiment with recipes and different things for you to try. He hated that he hadn’t made the time to recently. He cooked enough dinner to pack lunch for both you and him, then last minutely decided that you’d definitely want something sweet when you woke up and pulled out the ingredients to make pancakes from scratch.

You liked it best when you had pancakes for dinner, not breakfast.

He was extremely pleased when they turned out light and fluffy just the way you liked them and he set out to cut up some fruit for you to put on top, making sure everything was ready before heading back to your shared room.

Katsuki was less quiet this time around, as he slid into bed next to you. He propped himself up on his elbow as he buried his fingers into your hair and gently scratched your scalp.

You were exhausted, and likely wouldn’t have woken up if not for him leaning over and placing kisses from your neck all the way up to your ear. You felt his hot breath as he whispered for you to please wake up, which made you groan softly.

You’d yet to open your eyes, but who else would it be? You asked,“Katsuki?”

“Made you food, baby, c’mon, I saw you didn’t eat your lunch, you gotta put somethin’ in your belly.” He explained as he removed his hand from your hair and lifted the material of your shirt to rub up and down your stomach, you felt him inch closer to your chest before stopping himself and tugging your tank top back down to your waist.

You turned toward him, quickly finding the divet in between his shoulder and neck to plant your face in. You were barely awake, not really comprehending what he was trying to say.

“Missed you.” You relaxed further into him.

“Missed you so much, sweets.” You felt him kiss your forehead,“Hate to pull you from bed, but you really gotta open your eyes for me.”

You did as he asked, smiling as his face came into view, lit up by the soft light streaming in from the hallway. “Hi, honey.” You managed to get out as he smushed your cheeks (cuteness aggression) and placed three kisses onto your nose.

You grinned as he said hi back and repeated that he’d cooked for you.

You beamed, you hadn’t had his cooking in a while, but didn’t exactly make a move to get up from bed. It wasn’t until he revealed that he’d made you pancakes, that had you up in seconds.

He chuckled as he followed you down the hall, lightly smacking your butt as you happily made your way through the apartment. You turned to him with surprise,“You cleaned too?”

“Course.” He scoffed as he tugged on your hand and sat you down at your small table that sat four people max. “I’d do it more if you didn’t always beat me to everything, I was thinking I should be doing a bit more around here anyway.”

“I can handle it.” You said, like always.

He rolled his eyes as he brought over the plate he’d prepared for you.

“I didn’t say you couldn’t, I’m just saying you don’t have to give a hundred percent every day, you know? You could give me thirty and I’d be more than happy to give the remaining seventy.” He began to explain,“I wanna take care of you too, and that starts by you not doing everything.”

You silently watched him cut up your pancakes before placing some fruit onto them and drizzling maple syrup all over, he gave you tea to drink and pulled his chair closer to you while you ate.

He ran his fingers through your hair again as you told him all about your day before asking about his and what time he’d gotten home. He let you feed him a couple bites of food and you snagged a few extra kisses each time you lied and told him he had syrup on his face.

When you finished, he asked if you’d like a bit of real food, claiming he wanted you nice and full. You agreed, happy to eat what he’d prepared.

You were less tired now, satisfied with your belly full and sitting with your lover as he recalled a story about retrieving someone’s lost kitten in a tree. You laughed at the classic save and felt your mental load becoming lighter the more the minutes went on.

After eating, the pampering continued.

Katsuki demanded you allow him to run you a bath, and he quickly made the bathroom up with a few candles. He set up a movie for you to watch on your laptop as he came into the room with you and offered to wash your hair. You requested he get in with you then, and he obliged quickly, taking his time when it came to massaging his hands through your hair and pressing kisses against your back at every opportunity. He held you against his chest as you relaxed into him.

You honestly started to get sleepy again.

And then it was ripped away from you once more as Katsuki led you to bed, not to sleep, but to have you spread out against the mattress for him to plaster his tongue against you and demand he get his dinner now.

“Wanna take care of you.” He’d said.

He quickly had you squirming and writhing underneath his touch and the feel of his fingers inside as he worked you until completion. He sung you praises about how hard you’d been working lately, telling you how you deserved this and more, as well as making sure you knew how good you always did for him.

“One more, baby.” He begged.

One more turned into two then three, and by the time he finally lined himself up to your entrance you were spent. He worshipped your body, kneading your breasts and holding one of your hands back so you couldn’t hide how flushed your face had become from not just his compliments, but from the way he fucked you.

“Katsuki,” You moaned,“Close.” Again.

“Cum with me, baby, please.”

The movement of his hips was starting to get sloppy, but neither of you noticed through the haze. He whined in your ear as you latched onto his back with your hands and wrapped your legs around his waist, your walls squeezed him and he moaned one last time as he got lost in euphoria. He didn’t make a move to remove himself as he pressed his sweaty forehead against your own and kissed your cheek and then your neck and then your collarbone, making a line all the way down to your bellybutton.

He occupied himself with making sure you stayed awake despite your eyes being closed as you attempted to catch your breath, he sucked hard enough to leave a few marks along your chest and before you knew it you started to feel him become hard inside of you again.

Your eyes snapped open as you gave him a look.

Katsuki smirked as he rubbed your hip and stole your mouth briefly,“Gotta make sure you’re nice and full, baby, one more time f’me, please?”

“You’re insatiable.” You told him.

And yet, how could you say no to him when he looked at you that way?

It was a good thing you’d taken that nap earlier, especially now that your body would soon be aching for a different reason.

[yourdoorisunlocked]

I'll Never Meet Another You - Part 1

📺 【 𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝑰 | 𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝑰𝑰 | 𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝑰𝑰𝑰 】📺

𝐀/𝐍: Is that...? Oh my god- It's the sound of another WIP in my endless void of fanfic ideas that managed to see the light of day!! It also means I've added another demon husband to my ✨cOlLeCtIoN✨

So, I'm definitely doing a continuation of this- I was having WAY too much fun writing it.

Enjoy your yandere, stalking, creepy-ass television man! :)

. . .

𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐬: 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐫, 𝐲𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐯, 𝐨𝐛𝐬𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐞𝐭𝐜. 𝐒𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐑𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧: ꜱᴛᴀʟᴋᴇʀ'ꜱ ᴛᴀɴɢᴏ | ᴀᴜᴛᴏʜᴇᴀʀᴛ

. . .

Electricity bounced across clawed, neon-blue fingertips as Vox’s collection of monitors booted up, lining the walls in a cyan-hued excess of the latest tech his company manufactured.  

With but a wave of his hand, the devices were slaves to his command. 

As Vox sat upon his electronic throne that was centered before it all, he closed every work-related tab within his mental browser, before slumping in his seat within the darkness. The demon rubbed where the bridge of his nose would’ve been with a stressed crease in his brows; a little habit that he had acquired from his life above.  

To say it had been a long day would’ve been the understatement of the century. For the first twelve hours since he had emerged from his quarters, Vox had been bombarded with underlings shoving incessant workloads into his lap.

Ensuring the reputation of the Vees, the new VoxTech Angelic Security system that he had been developing, the countless amount of paperwork and maintaining the digital grid, and to top it all off, he had to manage the temper of one pissed-off Valentino. 

Ugh... Fuckin' Val and his goddamn runaways... it's not my fucking fault he can't manage his toys. 

Dealing with the lustful moth Overlord's temper tantrums were usually the absolute highlights of Vox's day, but this time in particular there was quite the treat in store for the overworked Overlord.

Hm... Maybe that's how the name came to be. Ah, who am I kidding? Velv just sits on her ass all day.

Of course, Vox pushed his indignation aside and swept everything up with a winning smile of pure showmanship, the pinnacle of excellence in front of the public.

And just as everything seemed to fall into place, like any other day of Vox cleaning up the messes of his fellow Overlords, something just had to go fucking wrong.

Imagine being the literal fucking backbone of the Vees, ensuring that their picture-perfect reputation of utmost excellence and being called up by an irritated Velvet to play babysitter and manage the man-child because of fucking Angel Dust- 

And then catching wind of ḧ̴͇͕́̍i̷̡̹͋͂̓m̵͈͔̳̭̙̍͝ returning... 

A few sparks flew from Vox's antenna as his overheated fans whirred rapidly. That old timey, triangle-assed p̴̲̩̮͙̜̎́̋r̸͓̟͆̀͆i̸̼͕͓̺̹̪̔͛͊̋͗c̸̢̤̐͂͜k̵̻̭̦̣̪͈̕-̸̢̡̪͇̖̈́... 

Slowly, he took a deep breath, stretching his knuckles and tilting his head to the side with a deep frown. He had the evening to himself, now. No Radio-Pricks, no need to maintain the perfect facade he had so carefully crafted for himself and his allies, and no Valentino.

Time to unwind... 

A cup of coffee materialized in his hand with a spark of electricity that lingered around his hand, dancing upon his fingers. He scooted just a bit closer to the large, main monitor within the center of TVs installed in his office, and his mental request was immediately answered by the large computer screen before him. 

A zipped file containing possibly the most sensitive information that you couldn’t fucking torture out of the television demon happened to be the very first result of his search, almost teasing him with the overtness of his little obsession. 

Vox clicked on the file quicker than ever before, and he took a long, slow sip of his drink as he focused solely upon the pretty little blessing that had graced his screens since a few months ago.

You were lounging on your couch, scrolling haphazardly on your phone in your less-than ideal apartment, but hey, it worked for you, so who was Vox to judge? Even if he would've placed you in one of the most mind-bogglingly extravagant penthouses that you'd ever seen in your afterlife, he had no qualms as long as you remained untouched. 

And luckily, his position and occupation made it more than easy to ensure that you had no one in particular in mind to take his place. 

No matter where you were, or what you were doing, nothing about you remained unseen by Vox, and no stone was left unturned when it came to your private life. 

And Vox was always there. Watching. Adoring you through digitally enamored eyes without moving an inch from his seat. 

Small, pixelated hearts floated across his interface as you looked through your phone, blessing him with a plethora of reactions. Whether it be with a small pout of your lips, to the furrow of your brows, to that cute giggle-snort you made whenever something seemed funny to you, the electronic Overlord drank it up like red wine from a golden cup glorified by gods themselves.

Lord, Vox had it bad.

Every step you took, every breath you inhaled, every purchase you made, every club or restaurant you went to, your exact order at your favorite diner, your taste in fashion and jewelry, he memorized every fact, photo, and video and saved it all in a private file.  

It was Vox's most precious possession, the closest he could ever get to you, for now.

Vox’s smile stretched across his flat-screen face; a neon hue of razor-sharp teeth pulled into a fond simper as the sound of your chiming laughter rang out across his office. 

How he wished to capture the sound, perhaps place it into a bottle for him, and only him to hear, your smile a treasure of the rarest quality to keep. 

There was no doubt about it, Vox was your number one fan. 

More monitors across the room lit up, whether it be with your beautiful face or your soft, angelic singing, there was nothing but you, you... 

Y̵̼̜̿o̴̝͕̾ṷ̸̇.̶͈͍̎̔ ̵̟̒̚ 

Vox hated the idea of having to share this with anyone else. Share you with anyone else. Every time he ended the night like this, he had to fight the urge to steal you away and seat you upon your rightful place, a throne beside his, towering above his empire with no unworthy, sinful eyes to look upon you. 

“Huh... I’ve actually always wondered what that ‘Vox’ guy is like in real life...” said demon froze at the sound of his name pouring from your lips, and a soft blush mixed with the bright blue glow of his face, coloring it a light lavender pink. You were talking to yourself again, something Vox binged like a talk show whenever he was off work.  

He could watch you all day like this. And God knows that he would massacre any number of demons, conquer any area of territory simply for a few minutes in your presence.

A casual conversation, witty banter, fuck, he'd rather talk about the goddamn weather with you than be deprived of your presence any longer. Not behind a screen, but in person.

Vox needed something, anything with you, romantic or platonic, though the former would surely grow an insatiable craving, if you kept teasing him like this.

He needed you to be there for him, to just treat him like a person.

Vox normally wouldn't mind the fact that he was always perfecting himself for others, catering to their every desire. A machine. Meant to serve the masses, and in turn, they'd fall to their feet before him like flies to honey, insatiable, pathetic worms. 

But it'd drive anyone to the brink of fucking insanity, to keep up the same, cheery yet suave charade every draining day.

And with you? Even if you never knew about your secret admirer’s ever-prying eyes watching your every step, it felt like Vox didn't need to put on a show for you. He could simply watch and listen as you, sweet, mischievous, lovable you talked his ears off for the rest of his day.

What I'd give to just kiss the hell out of her-

“Heh, he’s actually kind of cute. Y’know, for a TV, I guess...” you giggled at the end of your sentence as you scrolled through more photos of him, drinking up every piece of content that featured the demon that was watching you through your camera.  

A little side-menu of exactly what you had been looking through immediately popped up, and an intense zapping noise from above signaled to Vox that, once again, the demon was two seconds away from overheating and having to reboot himself as he nearly spit out his hot drink. 

Vox nearly short-circuited in his seat as you smiled warmly down at your phone, directly into his eyes as his cold, mechanical heart pounded in his chest, and bright red spread across his screen like a virus.

“Oh... Ohoho...” 

“Now that’s good television...” 

. . .

End Notes: Ok, holy SHIT-

I really like this one. Like GODDAMN this was so fun to write!! I'll definitely be doing headcanons for yandere Hazbin Hotel very soon. Also, that A03 shit I just pulled at the end? You're welcome ;)

Btw I'm working on my Masterlist, so if anyone has requests or drabbles that they'd like to enter, don't be afraid to ask! I think I'll make some rules clear later, like no EXTREME asks or kinks or anything like that.

Smut is on the table though don't be afraid lmao. I'll be the one shaking in my boots when I'm about to post it- 😓

Anyway, thanks for reading!! See you next time✨

[liveontelevision]

Redemption | Lucifer x Reader

This is mostly fluff and angst so far, but there's a chance i'll write a part 2 with some possibly smuttier stuff goin on 🥴

Heads up, Lucifer's a god damn mess in this one. Love to see my boy suffer, though.

♡♡♡

"Sure, whatever. You got the job." Lucifer let's out an exhausted sigh, pushing himself away from his desk and immediately pulling a stack of papers into his hands before beginning to walk off.

You lift up your finger as if to add something to this one-sided conversation, but nothing seems to come out. You shake your head and pull away from the same desk, where you were seated across from the king of Hell.

"O-Oh! Thank you, Your Highness! I'll be here first thing Monday morning!"

"Yeah, listen, I only hired someone because Lillith says I need to lighten my workload, but I can't trust some random sinner... and I got a whole system going, soo - " he responded to you as he took paperwork and filed it away, not at all engaged in conversation.

"Just be here and look busy at your desk. It's the cushiest job ever. If you're lucky, you'll get some calls and schedule some appointments." He waved his hand, silently dismissing you from his office.

"Ah.. well, i'll still be here if you ever need assistance, Sir! Right.. Monday, i'll be here! Thank you - " You stammered out some enthusiastic words before quickly walking towards the door and letting yourself out. Lucifer never stepped away from his work, letting you uncomfortably leave without a word.

The weekend goes quickly, and yet your first week working as Lucifer's assistant goes by slowly. He meant what he said. You simply sat at the desk right outside his office and managed to take one call the entire week. It was spam. You really couldn't complain much, though. You sat there and doodled, or read a book, or kept yourself busy with some other meaningless task and got paid well for it.

Very Well.

You thought that working at a job like this for even a single year would leave you with enough money to live comfortably in Hell, which was saying something. Lillith occasionally came by to ask how the king was, but you were given scripted answers by Lucifer for almost all her questions. You'd say things that made it sound like you were taking on as much work as possible, giving the Queen some sort of satisfaction with your employment.

Your relationship with Lucifer was distant for the first few years you knew him. But, about 5 years into this job, you actually felt well versed in your work. After he trusted you with at least filing things away, you became very familiar with his documents. So, when Lillith suddenly disappeared and Lucifer fell into a depression, you adjusted quickly to pick up anything he couldn't handle. He was frustrated that you were taking initiative but softened at the sight of how well you managed to get everything done.

As his mentality began to improve, he'd take on some paperwork that you would do, finally giving you a chance to breathe. No wonder Lillith insisted on getting him help. He had quite the workload.

After things were settled a bit more, it became easier to try and chat with him. You had brought him a pot of tea at some point, which quickly became a routine after you saw how much he appreciated it. Then as time went on, you'd bring two cups with you, sharing his free time.

You became closer during Lillith's absence, being the only person who saw him on the daily. You'd been there for his angry fits when something especially frustrating would occur. Or when work became too much, it led to a vulnerable display of misery that you had to be careful around.

On a certain day, you finally commented on Lucifer's depressed state. He was quick to open up to you, being too exhausted to consider the repercussions of sharing such intimate thoughts. That was the night you learned that Lillith had just disappeared. She left a note that instructed him to take care of Charlie, but there was no indication of her returning. He was such a kind soul, it twisted your heart seeing him suffer this much.

After that, things started to become more casual between the two of you. You'd handle his work with ease, and he appreciated you more than you'd ever know. Such a hard worker sticking by his side through all of it, it filled his head with a cluster of thoughts that he never had time to entertain. You were pleased to be able to call him a friend after all this time.

It's been 7 years since Lillith disappeared, and things had settled into a routine. You would do your work, ask him questions if needed, and spend your break time drinking tea and discussing personal projects or what your life was like. The few joyful stories you had would almost bring him to tears, considering he never was able to see what free will did for humans on Earth after all this time.

One morning, you heard him taking a phone call before a chipper Lucifer kicking open his office doors. You jumped, the wind blowing some papers away from in front of you.

"Damn it!" You huffed, quick to lean down to collect the mess he made.

"Clear my schedule for the rest of the day, sweatheart! My daughter wants to see me!" He spoke with pride, adjusting his bowtie and taking a deep breath to attempt to ease his nerves.

"Hey, that's great! I'll cancel your meetings. I'm glad to see that you two are finally getting in touch again." You smiled sincerely as you stood in front of him. You towered over him by just a few inches. You gave a quick swipe off his shoulders, clearinv some barely noticeable dust from his coat. He was quick to step away, not expecting the sudden touch. That was definitely something you picked up on; that he didn't really understand how to react to touch after Lillith left.

"Y-Yes, very good. I'll be getting ready if you need me." He stammered out, sending you awkward finger guns before making his way down the hall. You always loved seeing him flustered.

As you tried to get work done, you really couldn't keep your mind straight. You finally put some paperwork down after re-reading the same sentence over and over, realizing you weren't getting anywhere. You let out a huff and made your way to Lucifer's room.

He'd let you into his bedroom a handful of times over the years to pack his bags for trips that would take a few days or to bring him tea. There were a few times where you'd let yourself in, like taking care of him when he would get sick - no matter how much he insisted he didnt need the care - or if you felt he could benefit from talking something out.

You knocked lightly, but not getting a response for a while, you peaked your head inside carefully. He was pacing his room, multiple suits hanging in front of him on a rack and clothes piling up on the floors.

"Oh geez.. Lucifer, can I come in?" You asked out loud, your head already peaking in.

"Fuck! Ooh, sure! Yup! One.. Second..." You tried not to watch him portal away the mess, pushing random items inside before quickly snapping it away. He leaned on his desk, trying to seem unphased as you stepped inside. "Aaand what can i do for you, my dear?" He spoke as if he hadn't been a fumbling mess for the past half hour, but you could tell almost immediately.

"I just - I wanted to tell you how proud I am. I know you've had a rough couple of.. centuries... but I also know how much Charlie means to you, so I'm glad you're finally getting to see her work. I'm sure she looks up to you, no matter what you think of yourself." You looked away, shyly rubbing your arm for some sort of comfort, hoping that you weren't overstepping any boundaries. You weren't exactly looking in his direction when you spoke, so you didn't expect a sudden hand to take yours, running a thumb across your knuckles gently. You immediately perked up.

"Thank you.. You always know just what to say to calm me down, huh?" He sent you a sweet smile. It was clear that he was struggling to keep tears from welling in his eyes, the sentiment just too much for him to handle. He let out a quick sigh before giving your hand a small squeeze and letting it drop. Your eyes widened, and your face turned red. This was a big step. Even after all these years, he rarely made any physical contact with you.

"So! I guess now that you're here, I might need some help with - uh.. suits! W-What to wear.." He picked up on your flustered expression and was quick to change the topic. Snapping his fingers, he let the previous portal reappear. Clothes, accessories, and a full rack of suits fell out like a closet door that had burst open. You both stood in silence for a moment before you broke it with a snort, covering your smile immediately.

As soon as he returned, Lucifer immediately updated you on how the visit went. It was a long vent about some obnoxious red-headed demon, Charlie's clearly angelic girlfriend, and the sudden fear of having to contact Heaven and schedule the meeting.

"I've got it, sir. You know they seem to tolerate me more than you for some reason." You grin wickedly, flipping your hair to display confidence. He let out a soft chuckle and gave you a quick pat on the shoulder before heading back to his room.

It took all your strength not to follow him.

A few months had passed, and you had to pick up some more work than usual due to Lucifer being busy with the construction of the hotel that had been demolished. After it was completely done, you noticed that the building had an apple shaped tower. You confronted the king before he nervously admitted to moving into the hotel to be closer to Charlie.

"Oh! That's.. yeah, that's great, sir! I should be fine here, i've been handling it pretty well so far, right? I'll be fine." Your final statement was more for yourself than him.

"What? You're not joining me? I still have an office, and even if it's a bit smaller, i still expect you to come work for me. There's plenty of rooms, too, if you want to stay nearby. But, hey - if you'd rather stay here then - "

"No! I'll go to the hotel!" You quickly blurted out, seeing a sly grin across his face. Oh, he totally did that on purpose. You let out a groan and rolled your eyes, trying to conceal the light blush creeping across your face.

So, that was that. You were quick to settle into the hotel, meeting and bonding with the staff easily. Lucifer had told you so much about them that you could nearly recognize them through their appearance alone. Charlie was the easiest. She had plenty of pictures in the castle and looked just like her father. Once you had settled into your room that was just a few yards away from Lucifers office, you heard a quick knock. You opened the door to Charlie's bright face.

"Hi! I hope you're settling in okay! I don't know how much my dad's told you about my project, but.. if you're interested  - " She holds out a pamphlet, Redemption written across the top of it. " - you're totally welcome to join us!"

You take it with a smile before shutting your door again. You skimmed through it, getting the jist. It made you think of your parents. You hadn't seen them down here, luckily, so you wondered if they'd be in Heaven. You never had the best relationship, but they were family at the end of the day. Maybe it was something to consider.

The work environment was changing. Lucifer handled more hands on tasks, so you saw him less than before. You helped with anything Charlie or Lucifer needed, but still mainly stayed at your desk to finish some routine work. In your free time, you attended exercises and hung around with the other guests. You really only interacted with Lucifer for the past decade, so getting out and talking to others was a nice change.

Every so often, you'd get a chance to chat with Lucifer. When you entered the office in the morning and saw him working at his desk, you quickly whipped up some tea at the heated pad that was added to the office for this exact reason. You took any chance you could catch up with him. Placing the cups on his desk and filling them both, he almost jumped, clearly invested in this letter he was reading.

"Thank you.. how've you been doing? I know we don't get much tea time anymore - " he childishly clinks your cups together before taking a sip, " - but.. just been busy... Sorry." He said softly, his smile slightly drooping as he spoke.

You quickly swallow your tea to reassure him," Mm! Don't be sorry, I knew things would be different here, I don't mind! And besides, Charlie's been keeping me busy with the whole redemption thing. It's kinda fun, everyone here is really sweet." You spoke, going into detail about some of the exercises that went on and how they would play out. His smile never really picked up, he would simply nod and continued to sip his tea as you went on.

"Well - Glad you're having.. fun... I suppose." He glanced at a calendar sitting on his desk for just a moment, before letting out a shaky breath.

"Your highness? Is everything okay?" You immediately noticed his dismissive attitude, before placing your empty cup on his desk.

"It's Lucifer, remember? You've known me too long to keep calling me your highness." He cringed at the title, making quotation marks as he said it. He stood from his seat with a stretch. You had little room between the two of you when he stood up, making you stumble back a bit. He patted your shoulder, a gesture that became comforting throughout the recent months. His hand lingered a bit longer than usual. He stepped away, leaving the office to do some kind of task you weren't paying attention to.

"O-Okay..! I'll see you around then, Lucifer!" You nearly shouted his name, hoping he'd hear it even though he was down the hall at this point. He heard it. And boy, did he regret telling you to do that. He covered his red face as he turned the corner out of your view.

A few weeks had passed, and you really didnt see Lucifer around at all. Every time you went into the office, he seemed to just be heading out. Maybe it was just bad luck. But you went on with your routine, even without seeing him as much as you'd like.

With the stress of not seeing Lucifer and a particularly rough day, you struggled to walk to your room. Fumbling in your pocket for your room key, you caught a glimpse of the devil himself leaving his office.

"Lucifer!"

You called out, almost sounding relieved. He shot his eyes up to look at you, sending you a nervous smile and a little wave. You stumbled over yourself a bit to catch up to him, stopping him where he stands.

"How have things been going? You wouldn't happen to have time for some tea, would you? I'd love to get some updates!" Even with a drained social battery, you wanted nothing more than to be in his presence right now.

"O-Oh! U-Uh.. sure, i'll get it started, I have some time.." he rubs the back of his neck awkwardly, turning back towards the office.

"Great! I'll be there in a second, okay?" You cheerfully went back to your room, not noticing his nervous expressions as he spoke to you.

You took a few minutes to change into some comfortable clothes. Sure, you looked great in business casual, but nothing could beat a cropped t-shirt and pair of sweat pants that bagged loosely around your hips. Lucifer's seen you this way a few times. sometimes, late night projects needed to be worked on and he would always insist that you work in something comfortable, knowing it would take a while to finish.

So you had no issue when you reentered the office, shutting the door behind you.

He desperately tried to keep his eyes away from your mid drift, looking back towards the boiling water on the heated pad in front of him. His vest was undone and his coat was hung up nearby. He had rolled his sleeves up, and stood at the counter with his hands placed on his hips. You took in his appearance, feeling a bit better that he wasnt completely put together either.

"So? How's.. how's your day been?" He asked in a hushed voice, keeping his face completely out of view.

"It's been kind of a rough day, actually.. Charlie needed some help with some new residents, so I had to give a few tours. Which i don't mind of course, but fuck does that take more energy than i have. And some of the demons were looking at me funny, so I had to get out of their fast. Angel hid me in the library for hours! It was fine, though. Besides, it was fun to hang out with him. Oh, and Charlie says i'm making good process, too! That was a good pick-me-up." You said your last sentence with pride, puffing out your chest a bit.

"Fuck!"

You quickly drop your eyes to see Lucifer hunched over, clutching his hand with a hiss. You see the tea pot boiling over and quickly rush over to unplug the heated pad.

"Lucifer, be careful, geez! Is this why i make tea all the time? Can't handle it?" You teased, taking a towel to clean up the small amount of hot water sitting on the counter. Finally seeing the damage, you see a burn forming along the palm of his hand. You look at him for a moment, hovering your hand just over his wrist. He nods to you then looks away, letting you take a soft grasp onto his wrist amd leading it over to the accompanying sink just a few feet away. You held his hand under the faucet, letting a slow stream of cold water run over his hand. He flinches at the sensation, but immediately relaxes once he realizes how much of a relief it was.

"Are you okay?" You asked softly, leaning against the counter with your head cocked to the side. "Maybe it's just because you've been so busy, but i feel like something.. happened. Do you wanna talk to me?" You offered your help, but made it clear that he didnt need to open up if he wasnt ready. It was one of the boundaries you respected that he appreciated so much.

"It's- yeah. I'm fine. Things are going well, right? We have residents, Charlie's getting some good progress apparently, and Heaven's finally keeping us updated on the redeemed souls.. so, it's all good! Just needs a little elbow grease to keep this ship running, right? Nothin' the king of hell can't handle." He spoke smugly.

"Sure! It's great that the hotel's doing well. But I asked how you're doing." You clarified for him, crossing your arms across your chest. He groaned, placing his weight on his elbow on the counter and leaning forward, his hand still shifting under the running water.

"I-I'm.. it's..." he stammered and struggled to piece together his thoughts." It's... been almost 15 years. Since I hired you. Did you know that? Even after Lillith left, you still stuck around and took care of me.. I'm such a mess, why do you still take care of me..?" He mumbled his words, as if he never really wanted you to hear them.

 "I guess it has been, huh? Best decision of my life, really. I mean you pay me way too much, but.. I also got to make a friend, too. I'll be here for you no matter what, Lucifer. You're not a mess, you're doing great." You smiled at him, shifting your position to place a hand on his shoulder. He lets out a shaky breath, leaning his head towards your hand. His cheek brushed against the top of your hand, in a sort of caressing motion. You pulled away, out of shock, your hands enclosed in front of your chest. He looked up to see your eyes wide open and your body suddenly tense. He opened his mouth, as if to apologize, but stops to think for a moment instead.

He keeps his eye contact, taking a hold of your hand again, and pressing a small kiss on your knuckles, before leaving it in front of his lips. You felt his breath against your hand as he finally gets the courage to speak.

"You'll be here no matter what, huh? So.. If i were to ask you to... stay - I mean you don't have to say yes, but.. hypothetically... if i asked..." he spoke slowly, like he was still searching for the words as he said them out loud.

You melted at his sudden affection, your knuckles tingling from the sensation of his lips and breath against your hand. It was only after he spoke, you pulled your hand away from him carefully.

"What..? You mean like... stay in Hell? I don't - Lucifer, i'm confused. I've been working with Charlie for almost six months, you know? What's going on?" You sounded almost frightened, and it sent a pang to Lucifer's heart. He turned the sink off, beginning to rub the water off his hand. He hissed, the friction just causing more irration. Your instinct to aid him took over. You took the towel in one hand and his burned hand in the other, lightly dabbing the towel against the tender skin.

"Well, i said it was hypothetical, didnt I? What.. what would you say? Would you stay?" You paused with your hand holding his wrist, looking dwon at the calmed burn.

"Hypothetically? I don't.. I don't know, Lucifer.. I know Charlie could always use extra hands, and... you'd have to hire someone else, which would be a hassle - " he cringed at the thought of hiring someone else once it was said outloud.

"Exactly! See? You get it! I - We need as much help as we can get for the hotel, so.. maybe try to stick around. You've been too useful to keep doing this silly exercises, don't you think?" He was panicking. You could hear him desperately trying to come up with any excuse under the sun, but it still caused you to tense up. Your body curled into itself and you stepped back a bit, looking at him with such a purplexed expression that even he didnt understand what he was saying.

"Lucifer, I know your work is important and I know how much you want to support Charlie, but.. she said i'm doing it. That I might have a chance to go up to Heaven! Isn't that the whole point of being here? Isn't that what you want?"

His eye twitched at your words and he was quick to change his temper.

"No! It's not! That's not why you're here..! You're here, because I need you - need you to keep working for me! You're here because I brought you here. You know, the last redeemed soul was only here for six months, too! You could disappear at any second!" His voice sounded stern, but it was clear his intentions dripped of desperation. It still hurt you nonetheless.

"I'm sorry, but what the fuck?? I'm doing all the activities and making friends here, I thought you'd be happy about that! I've supported you through so much and even though you're acting this way, i always will! I thought you'd do the same!" You began to pace the office, your breath hitching a bit as you spoke. You tried your hardest not to let the tears in your eyes well up. Not wanting to let Lucifer see you in this state, you began to leave the office, quickly opening the door.

"No! Wait! I can't - I-I don't know how to - " He still struggled to get a coherent sentence out as you turned to face him one last time.

"Sir - "

" I told you not to call me that..!" He clenched his fists at the term.

"No. I can't do this while you're acting like this. I'll give you some space, let you figure out.. whatever's going on with you, then... we can talk. But if you decide that this is all you have to say, then I'll be continuing my work with you and Charlie, as usual. Goodnight, Sir."

You couldn't help but let your voice crack as you spoke. The idea of just moving past this sudden outburst hurt, but you knew that sometimes he just needed that space. And you hated to admit that you could use the space as well. You were supposed to be the calm and collected assistant, right? You were his anchor for a lot of the struggles he'd seen throughout the years and he confided so much in you.

What the fuck was his problem?

---

A few hours had passed, it gave both of you time to calm down from the heated discussion. Lucifer found himself right in front of your room, still without the strength to knock on your door. He took a deep breath in and held it in his chest before finally reaching foward. Before he even got the chance, the door swung open, smacking the air from his lungs. You both make sudden eye contact with eachother before Lucifer was hunched over coughing out the wind that was just knocked out of him. You cover your smile with your hand, pulling away from the door to open it fully.

"I guess you really are a mess, Lucifer.. what do you need?" You couldn't help but giggle when he lost his composure like this, it lightened your mood for a moment.

"Ahha.. you know me so well. I-I want to talk to you, you deserve an apology.." His voice was quiet, but you knew it was sincere. You stepped to the side, allowing him to enter your room.

"Okay, just - let me get through this, alright?" He took in a deep breath and spoke quickly,

"I don't understand why you want to go to Heaven. I told you about it in the past, you know how awful they are.. the rules and the limitations, fuck! They've done nothing but hurt me and fuck up everything going on down here. You couldve died you know! If you werent working for me and were just wandering the streets, you couldve been killed in any of those exterminations! I can't lose you! I-I - " you immediately noticed him losing his train of thought, and take a soft grip on his wrist in an attempt to ground him.

"I think my parents are up there, sir- Lucifer.."

He stops where he's at and looks towards you, before walking backwards and plopping down at the bench in front of your vanity.

"I-I didn't know. I never thought about-"

" - why i'd want to be redeemed? This isn't about wanting to leave you, I just.. i didnt realize this was an option, you know? That i might get to see them, again.."

Just for your own comfort, you shifted your grasp from his wrist to his hand, running your thumb across his palm lightly. The motion made him shiver slightly, still a bit sensitive from the burn.

"I didn't know you'd want to see them, i'm sorry.. you don't really talk about them much, so i thought..."

"No, you're right I didn't really have a good relationship with them, but it'd be nice to know theyre happy still, right? That all that time they spent working to keep me in school was worth it.. don't i owe them that?" He took a moment to process your words, his fingers slowly curling around your hand.

"I mean, you don't owe them anything, really. I have to ask, when's the last time you did something.. for yourself? You've been working for me for years and even here, it sounds like you're.. Ah, I'm sorry, i don't know what i'm saying - ". He always struggled with reading emotions, but even he could tell that that his words struck a nerve.

He looked away, dreading the silence that followed. What he wasn't expecting was the small hic and sniffles that suddenly came from your direction. He almost panicked, his eyes darting around the room for anything that seemed like a solution. He quickly stood up and hesitantly reached towards your face, just lightly brushing the tears that had streaked down your reddened cheeks.

"I-I don't know... I don't need much and I'm happy doing whatever you need me to, usually, so - I'll just keep doing that, okay? I-I'll stay.."

He groans and cringes at your words, before lifting your head to meet his eyes, his hands softly cupping your cheeks as he continued to wipe the tears still falling from your eyes.

"If you want to go to Heaven, I can't stop you. I-I won't stop you. But I also want you to.. be happy. I'm sorry about earlier, I never wanted to make any of this harder for you. You've done so much for me, sweetheart, I was scared of losing.. you... But I can handle myself, I promise. I mean, i'm a 10,000 year old demon with more power than I know what to do with. I'll be okay." He spoke sweetly, finally managing to let out a coherent thought. You melted into his touch, placing your hands overtop of his. Your eyes fluttered shut, allowing the last few tears to drip down.

"I know. I mean, sometimes I don't - sometimes it feels good to be able to help you so much - but I know you'll be fine." Your voice had a hint of hesitation. It was a relief to get some sort of resolve out of this conversation, but deep down, it felt as if you were deemed worthless. After all these years, he's saying he'd he fine if you went on to pursue other things, but why does that hurt?

"You asked when.. when was the last time I did something for myself. Honestly, I feel selfish. I feel like I've spent all this time taking care of you, because I like... feeling needed. I like that you ask me what to wear when you're nervous, or that you let me handle some of your more obnoxious clients just so you don't have to, I- I love it, actually. I love - being with you." You didn't realize you let out a mild confession, until you looked back to Lucifer to see his incredibly nervous expression. He was holding his breath, eyes impossibly wide as he bites his lower lip to prevent a quiver. He finally gulped before looking away and rocking back and forth on his heels.

"W-Well then! Self care at its finest, am I right? Ahha.. that's great how selfish you are! Self-selfless! Very selfless actually, I.. I really appreciate that you enjoy being around - enjoy my company..!" You watch him whip his hands behind his back, defaulting to the nervous mess he usually became when racked with a stressful situation.

"Oh! Lucifer, I'm sorry, that was a lot, I don't want you to feel like you have to - " A red clawed finger quickly hits your lips, and you see him with a lovely flustered expression. He took a moment to collect his thoughts, finger still uncomfortably pressed to your mouth.

"Can I- would you let me just- Fuck.. can I do something?" He blurted out. He was always so easy to read, but you prayed you weren't misunderstanding when you took a hold of his hand and pressed a small kiss to the tip of his finger that had lingered over your lips until now. He let's out a nervous chuckle and you hear an audible gulp as he moves his hands back to your cheeks, pulling your face down slightly to be able to meet his gaze. You can feel his heavy breath against your lips, suddenly realizing how close he actually was. In a quick motion, you pressed another small kiss onto his lips. You felt his hands jump at the sudden interaction, and tried your hardest to keep a smile from creeping on your face.

He let out a quick breath before planting a shaky kiss onto your lips, lingering for a moment longer this time. It still wasn't a lengthy kiss, but it was more than he could manage before stepping away for a moment, overwhelmed by your presence. This finally gave you a good look at him, a bright pink flush covered his face, and a small sheen from the lipgloss you forgot you were wearing appeared on his lips.

"You're so pretty, Lucifer." You spoke boldly, a suddern surge of confidence hitting you, just seeing him in this state.

"Can we keep going..?" You asked softly, taking a seat on the edge of your bed. He pulls at his collar, attempting to let any cool air hit his heated skin to try and calm him down. It's been a long time for him, sure, but considering the previous discussion, hearing you say you loved being around him, was enough to give him the confidence to nod along and sit next to you. You took a hold of his cheek and turned his head to face yours.

"I'll only do what you're comfortable with okay? We can stop whenever you need to." Your voice was sweet, your thumb beginning to run across his bottom lip as you spoke. He struggled to keep his eyes open, melting into your touch, and propped his hand on your arm to keep himself upright. He nodded slowly, finally letting his eyes droop close as you bring him into another kiss. You were definitely more confident than he was in this moment, or maybe it was just repressed excitement for an opportunity like this to happen. With your thumb still holding his bottom lip slightly ajar, you kissed along the each corner of his mouth before leaving an open mouthed kiss right on his lips. You pulled your hand away to place it gently on his leg as you pull yourself closer.

Finally pulling away to catch your breath, you look at Lucifer, who's still holding his eyes tightly shut. Each move you made, made him jump.

"Lucifer, Hey, open up." You laugh as you speak, brushing a few strands of golden hair away from his eyes. "Are you okay? Do you need a break?" His eyes finally shot open hearing your words. The thought of stopping must have startled him. You feel his lips crash against yours, a stark contrast to the gentleness you were giving him moments ago. He shifts to sit on his knees on your bed, keeping himself close to you by propping his hands on either side of your legs. You let out a surprised yelp, quick to catch up with his sloppy kiss. It became more tender as time went on, plus taking the lead again made it a bit easier to control his nervous movements.

His hands moved up to sit on your thighs, mostly to make himself more comfortable at this mildly awkward position. But it still gave you butterflies to feel his hands on you.

You pulled away yet again, taking a moment to breathe and to simply look at his expression. His eyes were watery, possibly from the emotional stress of the past few days, possibly from his excitement alone. You pressed your hand against his chest, feeling his rapid heartbeat beneath your palm. He tightened his grip on your thighs, as if you could disapear at any moment. And it scared him to consider that a possibility. Your mind finally caught up to the problem at hand, seeing him in this state and considering the heated conversation from before.

You pull him in one final time, a deep kiss that seemed to melt his nerves away. Then, you simply brought him into a tight embrace, your hands wrapping around his shoulders and gripping at his vest. For some reason, this startled him more than any of your previous interactions. He was hesitant at first, but still shifted to comfortably wrap his arms around your waist and pull you impossibly closer.

"This is a big decision, Lucifer. I have alot to think about, and it isnt really your fault, but this definitely doesn't make things easier.." you muffled your words into the crook of his neck letting out a shakey breath. He could feel your chest shake a bit due to your close proximity.

"I know, I'm sorry. I might have gotta a little carried away there." He responded. The position the two of you were in let his words pass dangerously close to your ear. You shutter slightly, unconciously leaning into the sensation.

"I'll make sure this is what I want, okay? I promise."

He nods, which you felt in the form of his hair brushing against the side of your face. Lucifer let his head fall down onto your shoulder, taking in the moment while it lasted.

Because, who knows how long this could last?

♡♡♡

FUCK this was angsty my bad. I had this prompt in my notes for days and I still honestly don't know how to properly end it, but i'll make a part 2 eventually.

Accidentally put a lot of personal insecurities in this one 🙃

Hope you enjoyed :)

P.S I have been getting your requests and i'll start them up soon! Just had to finish this one up first!

[sapphicromanoffxo]

Lucky Ones | iii. Testing the waters

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Wanda Maximoff

Word count: 2697

Warnings: Gossiping, Dirty Talking, Degradation, Lost of Virginity, Oral sex, Fingering, Praise kink

Summary: Wanda spends her summer break back in the company and heard some slight gossips about Natasha. This caused for Wanda to ask questions to the older woman.

»»-----------► Series Masterlist

The day was a whirlwind of chaos, with orders buzzing in every minute, tasks being tackled from left to right, and an atmosphere of palpable tension settling over the team. The groundbreaking ceremony had been rescheduled, casting a looming deadline of less than two months to finalise every plan and submit the necessary reports.

"God, I need a second cup of coffee. I'm on the brink of my sanity with all these excel sheets!" Sharon, Natasha's junior engineer, exclaimed with theatrical exasperation. "I have no idea how we'll manage to meet our target deadlines with these requests piling up," she added.

"I know exactly what you mean. These never-ending numbers and charts are giving me a pounding headache," Maria chimed in, empathising with Sharon's sentiments.

Wanda, ever the silent observer, chose to keep her inner thoughts to herself. Her reserved nature and preference for handling things smoothly guided her decision to listen rather than voice her concerns in the midst of the chaos.

"Wanda, you seem to be pulled in so many directions by Natasha. How are you managing with all of this?" Sharon inquired curiously, attempting to gauge Wanda's thoughts on the matter.

"It's undeniably stressful, but I don't have much choice except to follow her demands and try to get everything done as quickly as possible," Wanda replied candidly.

"Natasha usually has reasonable demands, but this project is on a whole different level. I can see how everyone is on edge whenever she's not satisfied with the results. She nearly fired Jennifer because of her incorrect calculations," Sharon shared with the two other ladies, recounting a recent mishap involving their colleague.

"Romanoff intimidates me to no end, to be honest. I'd crumble under her scrutiny. I couldn't handle it," Maria admitted.

As Wanda absorbed all this information about Natasha's management style and its impact on the team, it became clear that Natasha could be quite demanding when her expectations weren't met.

"Hey, Wanda, do you think that if Natasha had a partner, it might soften her up a bit?" Sharon asked mischievously, introducing a playful notion into the conversation.

Wanda found herself unsure of how to react to Sharon's probing question. She was uncomfortable with the topic, but before she could voice her feelings, Maria interjected, "Hush, Sharon. You're being too nosy!"

Sharon, undeterred, continued, "What? Aren't you curious? In the two years I've been working here, I've never once heard that she's dating anybody. For the record, there are also no known past lovers. How does she do it? She's undeniably attractive, anyone with eyes can see that."

Maria responded with a hint of skepticism, "I can't tell if you're genuinely curious because you admire her looks and want to commend her for that, or if you're just fixated on our boss's seemingly non existent love life."

"Whoever she dates must be incredibly lucky," Sharon said dreamily.

Wanda remained silently stunned in her seat, her mind racing with questions. Natasha's extreme privacy had her employees speculating about her romantic life. It also made Wanda contemplate her own situation. Did Natasha have past lovers who were once in the same position as her? Were they offered all the luxuries and responsibilities she currently enjoyed? Her thoughts began to spiral, bordering on overthinking.

"Don't worry about us, Wanda. We're just gossiping to take a break from this exhausting workload," Maria reassured her with a friendly smile.

Wanda simply nodded in acknowledgment and returned to her ongoing task. The hum of activity continued around her as she focused on her work.

Natasha sat in their house, nursing a glass of whiskey, and observed Wanda with a thoughtful gaze. She sensed something was on the younger woman's mind and decided to initiate a conversation.

"How was your day, sweetheart? I apologise for not being able to talk much during the day, there was so much to be done," Natasha inquired, her tone carrying a hint of genuine concern.

Wanda replied, "It's alright. I assisted Sharon and Maria while also working on the report you requested for today."

With a contemplative hum, Natasha finished the last drops of her whiskey, setting the glass aside. Wanda mustered the courage to broach a more personal topic.

"Natasha, there are some things I'm curious about, but I'm not sure if you'd be open to discussing them," she began tentatively.

Natasha raised an eyebrow, her interest piqued. "Well, that would depend on what you're curious about," she replied with a hint of intrigue.

Wanda proceeded cautiously, "I'm just curious about how you achieved such remarkable success at a young age. Becoming the CEO of M&A Engineering Corporation at 29 must have been an incredible milestone. It seems like you've been quite fortunate."

Natasha almost bristled at the word fortunate but her reaction remained guarded. "My father recognised my potential, and we started from there. I had to prove my worth, and it eventually led to me securing the position," she replied carefully, without revealing any key information about herself.

Wanda complimented her sincerely, "I truly admire your dedication and strength. Balancing work and studies is a challenging feat, and from what I've seen, you've excelled at it." Her words held a note of admiration and respect for Natasha's achievements.

"You'll reach great heights too, Wanda. I can see how you're building yourself up, and I'm confident you have a bright future ahead," Natasha replied, sharing her genuine belief in Wanda's potential.

"I have to thank you for that, I'm not sure I would have been able to finish my last semester without your support," Wanda expressed her gratitude.

Natasha responded, "I just did what needed to be done."

Curiosity still lingered in Wanda's mind, and she ventured further, "If you don't mind, can I ask more questions?"

Natasha, curious about the direction of the conversation, simply asked, "What's on your mind?"

Wanda inquired with great curiosity, "What were you like before you became a successful engineer? I mean, with your looks, I can imagine people falling at your feet."

Natasha, anticipating where the line of questioning is headed, decided to provide a short and guarded response, "I followed a strict path, focusing on my studies and career. I didn't have time for relationships. I was determined to complete my degree, pursued my master's, and dedicated myself to my work at my father's company." She chose to keep her personal life private, as she often did, leaving Wanda to wonder even more.

"Nothing at all? Not even before I came into the picture?" Wanda pressed on, seemingly oblivious to the gears turning in Natasha's head.

Natasha maintained her calm demeanour as she responded, "No, I never entertained the idea of committing to another person. It seemed like a lot of work."

Wanda's insecurity crept into her tone as she asked, "So, what changed then?"

Natasha met Wanda's gaze and replied with a touch of vulnerability, "I couldn't resist the urge to learn more about you. You could say that I was genuinely intrigued by you." There was a softness in Natasha's eyes that hinted at mischief.

"I would like to test some of my theories," Natasha said, skillfully steering the conversation away from any further probing questions Wanda might have.

"And how do you plan to do that?" Wanda inquired, intrigued by what Natasha has in mind.

"Allow me to show you," Natasha stood up gracefully and gestured for Wanda to follow her into the bedroom. As they entered the room, Natasha gently placed her hand on Wanda's waist, a subtle but electric touch that made Wanda's heart race.

In the dimly lit bedroom, they both stood beside the bed, Wanda facing it while Natasha stood behind her.

Natasha couldn't help but comment, "You always smell so good, Wanda." She peppered delicate kisses along Wanda's neck, her hands tracing teasing patterns on the hem of Wanda's nightgown, softly grazing her thighs.

Wanda's only response was a soft bite on her lip. She felt a mixture of excitement and nervous anticipation with whatever is about to happen between them. Her ass is pressed on Natasha's front and the older woman starts groping Wanda's breast.

"I find these incredibly captivating," Natasha purred sensually, her palm aggressively kneading Wanda's breasts. The atmosphere was charged with desire and intimacy which is almost suffocating.

"Natty, please."

"What do you want, detka?"

Wanda whimpered upon hearing Natasha's husky voice in her ear. This is escalating to a new level and Wanda internally shaking.

"Use your words, Wanda. I'd like to hear what you want."

Wanda's voice quivered as she confessed, "I want you to touch me everywhere and take me however you desire!" Her desperation was evident in her tone, a reflection of the burning desire that Natasha had ignited within her.

A sly grin curled on Natasha's lips, and she leaned in closer, her ego delighting in Wanda's vulnerability. "I like the sound of that. Just so you know, I don't like being gentle."

Wanda's heart raced with a mixture of excitement and apprehension. She had imagined their first time together to be soft and tender, but Natasha's unpredictable nature took things in a thrillingly different direction.

"Get on the bed. I want your ass up in the air."

Wanda hastily obeyed, climbing onto the bed and assuming the position Natasha had requested. This position exposed her vulnerable ass and Wanda is feeling a bit scared now on what Natasha had in mind.

“I have been observing you for too long now, Wanda. I do think that you deserve a reward for being my good girl. Don’t you agree?” Natasha taunts the younger woman while softly caressing her ass. “Answer me when I am speaking to you, little girl!” That earned a hard slap in Wanda’s ass.

“Yes! I have been a good girl and I need to be rewarded, please.”

“That’s what I’m talking about.You make sure to remember your manners or you’ll be punished instead.” Natasha started pushing Wanda’s nightgown wherein her back is now also exposed.

“Natasha…”

“Yes, Wanda? Feeling impatient? You were able to wait for all these months. A couple of minutes won’t do you any harm.” Natasha said with a sinister voice.

Wanda whimpered again and didn't want to upset the older woman.

“Would you show how good you are if you take whatever it is that I'll be giving you?”

“Yes, Natasha.”

“Hmm. From now on, call me miss whenever I’m about to fuck you senseles. Is that understood?” Natasha emphasised her question with another slap on Wanda's ass.

“Yes, Miss! I understand.”

“Good girl.”

Nastasha started peperring hot kisses on Wanda’s back. Wanting to kiss every part of her Wanda and made sure to leave mark in order for her to fully claim Wanda as hers. Her hand drifted down to Wanda’s pussy and was delighted to find her core already wet.

“Oh my. I haven’t even properly touched you and you are dripping for me, baby. What a slut you are.”

Wanda’s head is spinning, Natasha’s words are doing a number on her and she’s unconsciously heading to a subspace, something that is an uncharted territory for her.

“Please, Miss…hmp!” Wanda whimpered once again as Natasha started circling her clit.

“Does that feel good, baby? Would you like more? I bet your pussy will be able to take 3 fingers instantly.

That sent a blaring alarm sound in Wanda’s mind. She’s been so desperate for Natasha’s attention and touch that she has forgotten to tell her that she’s a virgin.

“Nata- Miss. I have something to tell you.”

“What is it, pretty girl?” Natsha temporarily stops her attempts to tether Wanda on edge.

“Uhmm.. I - I’m a.. I have never done this before.”

Natasha wants to be shocked by Wanda’s revelation but it feeds her ego even more knowing that she's about to take Wanda's innocence. “Does that mean that you want me to be gentle?”

“No, I can take it. Just take it slowly, please.” Wanda is pleading that her request would somehow be granted by Natasha.

“Very well. Lay on your back, spread your legs wide for me.”

Wanda followed her order again and did what she was told. Natasha was very ecstatic with how eager Wanda wants to please her. It drives her crazy and does not want to prolong this anymore.

"Please, Wanda, if you ever feel even the slightest bit uncomfortable, don't hesitate to tell me," Natasha said earnestly, her voice laced with a caring concern. "I want you to know that your comfort and consent are my top priorities. But," she added with a playful glint in her eye, "I do hope you won't be asking me to stop."

Natsha descended her mouth on Wanda’s awaiting core and dived right in her aching clit. Wanda moaned in surprise feeling Natasha’s warm mouth on her. Wanda’s hands claw on the bedsheet to somehow ground her as she’s feeling her soul leave her body with all the pleasure that Natasha is giving her.

“Miss, ahhh.. You feel so good —hmf! Natasha!” Wanda exclaimed as Natasha started sucking her clit. Natasha is very thrilled with all the noises that Wanda has been making. The soft moans that turned into growls as Wanda is nearing her orgasm. The older woman decided to penetrate Wanda with her left middle finger, hoping to get a reaction out of her.

“Miss miss miss!” Wanda is babbling her incoherent thoughts as she’s feeling all the sensations that she thought she’d never feel from anyone. It made Wanda feel the pleasure mixed with pain but she doesn’t have the heart to tell Natasha to stop. All she wants is for this to never end. Her legs clamped on each side of Natasha’s head and it earned her a slap on her right breast.

“Keep your legs open or I will stop.” Natasha warned her to keep her legs in place.

“I’m sorry, please don’t stop. I need you!”

Natasha continued where she left off. Wanda is absolutely drenched. She has never tasted anything so addicting and she could stay here as long as she wants. She then again added another finger, pulling in and out in a gentle phase. Wanda was once again elevated to a new height of pleasure which made her scream with so much passion.

“Oh my god, Miss. Please! I need more!”

Ofcourse, Natasha could not deny her pleas and started to thrust her two fingers with so much force making Wanda’s eyes roll back. Her mouth is now agape and her throat is now dry from all of the screams and moans that she’s been making in the past minutes

Natasha is unmerciful with her fingers with the combination of her talented tongue, this sent Wanda into her orgasm without warning, hitting her like a tidal wave. Pleasure coming down on her leaving her dazed in fulfilment.

Wanda is sure that stars are dancing around her eyes for a minute before she is able to catch her breath.

"Are you feeling better now, Wanda?" Natasha inquired, her voice tender and filled with genuine concern. She continued to massage both of Wanda's thighs, which had gone limp in the aftermath of their intense moment. "You did so good for me, baby. I'm proud of you." Natasha further added.

Wanda took a deep, steadying breath as she met Natasha's caring gaze. The intimate connection they had just shared left her feeling vulnerable, but also incredibly content. "Yes," she replied softly, her voice a mixture of satisfaction and affection. "I feel more than alright, Natasha. I feel amazing. Thank you."

"That's reassuring," Natasha whispered, her fingers gently caressing Wanda's thighs as they lay together in the afterglow. She leaned in to place a tender kiss on Wanda's lips, savouring the lingering taste of their shared passion. "But remember, my dear, we have so much more to discover and explore together. This is merely the beginning of what I have in mind."

Wanda's eyes sparkled with a mixture of anticipation and affection as she gazed into Natasha's deep, knowing eyes. "I can't wait to see what you have in store, Natasha," she replied, her voice filled with sincerity and curiosity.

[imogenkol]

piggy backing a little bit off of this brilliantly heart-wrenching post by @e-the-village-cryptid I wanted to dip my toe into the whole Bix x Timm dynamic - why Bix chose him and why it reads heavily as compulsory heterosexuality to me.

Bix has so many plates spinning - between managing her own salyard and organizing a black market operation selling ship parts to the rebellion (which could get her incarcerated for life at best and executed at worst), she is constantly keeping herself occupied so that she doesn't have to engage with her own thoughts. But she still has to go home at the end of the day, and if personal experience has taught me anything, it's that no matter how worn out you are, whatever you're trying not to think about will always haunt you during the night.

I feel like Bix dreads when the anvil rings at the end of the day because she has to go back to an empty home, with nothing but herself and her own thoughts. She probably still works on a few projects by herself there, but that can only hold her focus for so long.

After her on-and-off failed relationship with Cassian that lasted for years, Bix doesn't strike me as the kind of person who even wants to pursue a relationship with anyone at all. That takes time she doesn't have or want to waste and requires her to be open and vulnerable, which is counter-productive to her daily goals. However, there is still a gap that really needs to be filled by something.

Enter Timm Karlo, who Bix has employed at her salyard for an undisclosed, but probably decent amount of time. He is reliable at work and her right hand man in the business. Timm picks up the slack that Bix is physically incapable of doing herself because her workload is already massive. So there's a level of appreciation for him already there and he is, of course, already there. Bix didn't have to go looking for him, she didn't have to put much effort to court or be courted. Timm most likely had feelings for her for a while before she finally decided to reciprocate.

Timm Karlo is perfectly convenient and ordinary.

I'm not saying Bix intentionally heartlessly used him per se, I do believe she had some genuine affection for him, but it is very telling that even when they are officially a couple, she still keeps him at arms length and sometimes even further.

It seemed that they had a very specific set of rules set by Bix. Dinner one night a week. Not twice a week. No spontaneous dates (unless she decides to visit him outside of the set agreement on her own terms). One night a week.

Of course that could be explained by Bix's ridiculously loaded schedule, but it feels like she views the relationship less like a relationship and more like another quota to be filled. Bix shows very little genuine interest in Timm outside of that. She is easily irritated by him and hasn't really told him much about herself other than what everyone already knows (this is honestly the best explanation I can think of as to why she told him Cassian was from Kenari. It's easier to talk about people you know than yourself). The one time they do spend the night together on screen is after Bix has had some drinks at Cavo's and got too deep in her own head about everything happening. Timm was fulfilling his main purpose in that scene - to be a distraction.

The biggest thing for me is that she does not tell him about her secret operation. Bix doesn't trust him, at least not fully, despite the line "He'd do anything for me." If she really believed that, I feel like she would have told him what she was doing, being the reliable hard worker he is. Maybe a part of her knew he couldn't keep his mouth shut, maybe she wanted to protect him, maybe she was greedy and didn't want to have to give him a cut. Could be all of the above.

No matter how you slice it, I truly don't believe Bix held deep feelings - or really any genuine attraction - towards Timm. I think that's what makes his death even more traumatic for her, in all honesty. She feels responsible even though he was an insecure, jealous man that went behind her back and betrayed what little trust she had in him. Which made her feel foolish because she never gave him much thought at all and that's how she overlooked the obvious signs.

In conclusion, Bix should date girls.

[habken]

oh my gosh fellow animation student !! I love learning about other people's art school experience, if you'd be willing to share? I think the diversity of assignments and teaching styles and focuses is cool 🩷 love your art as well !!

Yeah I can share a bit ! I’ve really enjoyed the program so far, I think I’ve learned a lot and I’ve gotten the chance to use programs I wouldn’t have access to usually!

First semester I had 9 classes (I’m counting story lab + lecture as two separate ones) and it was honestly pretty difficult to keep up with the workload, especially because I was still finishing up zine work. I had so many assignments, there were many weeks I’d have something due everyday, sometimes multiple things in the same day, so time management was a big struggle and I ended up having to sacrifice the amount of drawing I did for fun and for socmed </3 I think that was the biggest bummer cause it meant I lost both what helped me relieve stress and something that made me happy :/

While the work was intense and time consuming, I really did enjoy what I was making for each class. My favourite classes were character design, storyboarding, and animation. I felt like they were the ones I did best in and I realized loved my animation teacher her classes were really fun and I laughed a lot lol. I also really enjoyed my life drawing class, I have a lot of respect for my teacher, he marked harshly but I learned so much under him and my life drawing skills have improved a lot since september. He also collects bones and brought them in and it was super cool. He told us all the stories of were he’d picked them up, like asking farmers or finding roadkill and cleaning them.

Overall in each class, I really appreciated the critique I’ve gotten and I feel like I’ve really improved! I actually dropped out of art school before and one of the main reasons was because I felt like I wasn’t really getting anything out of the program. My stuff was nowhere near perfect but I was one of the better students so teachers used my stuff as an example rather than see me as a student that also was there to learn. I hated that so I left, and I’m really happy I don’t feel that way in the program I’m in now!

What I will say though is one of the hardest lessons to learn is that you can’t go 100% on every single thing, it’s just straight up impossible unless you don’t take care of yourself and get no sleep. It sucks because you want to do your best and be amazing at everything, but an assignment that’s half assed is better than handing in nothing at all and also better than permanently hurting yourself because you push through the pain and don’t allow yourself any rest.

One of the things that sucked the most assignment wise was my bone portfolio for life drawing, I had so much planned out and I really wanted to do amazing, but I had to cut a lot out to get it done on time, and so the finished project was lacking a lot. I got a decent mark for it, but personally I know it could’ve been so much better, and I just have to live with the sacrifice I made so I could get all my work done on time lol

I don’t want to share too much more about the assignments I did, but I was really proud of my work in my character design class and also my last storyboard assignment, where we took part of a script and made new boards based on it. I got a lot of compliments from the teacher about my attention to detail with subtle and human actions. I’m happy cause that’s the kind of stuff I love portraying and love seeing in films haha.

One other thing is I was so close to failing layout, the last two assignments I left until the very end and almost didn’t get them in one time before teacher’s grades were due, and without them I would’ve failed the class. As it stands, I got over a 90 average so the two assignments made a big difference lmao.

Sorry this was so long lol

[darkstar225]

Twice's 10th member throws a tantrum because of college (same-) ft SNSD's Tiffany as GF

A/N: Heyyy, I'm coming up with a lot of stuff for you guys so I can make up for the time I'm gone lol! Sry for taking so long to post :D I hope that my friend Thira490, who gave me this idea on Wattpad likes it! :)

The request: Hi I really love your book and I want to request where y/n is dating Tiffany snsd and y/n throws a tantrum because of homework from school and the members were worried so jihyo called Tiffany and told her what happened and Tiffany came to the dorm to calm y/n down and help her with the homework. Thank u ❤️

PS: Tysm for everyone who reads what I write, I hope I can bring a smile to your faces every time I post! I'd like to thank whoever sent me this idea 'cause I loved to write it <3

__________________________________________________________

Y/N sat at her desk in the dorm room, her laptop open in front of her, and piles of textbooks scattered across the table. Her college assignments and exams were looming over her, and the stress was beginning to take its toll. She had always been a diligent student, but the demands of being a college student and a member of TWICE had become increasingly challenging to manage.

Dating Tiffany from Girls' Generation had its perks, including having a loving and supportive partner, but it also meant balancing her busy idol life with her academic responsibilities. Today, her college work had pushed her to the brink, and TWICE's sunshine couldn't help but feel overwhelmed.

She let out an exasperated sigh, rubbing her temples. 

Y/N - I can't do this. It's just too much. *frowns*

Down the hall, the other members of TWICE exchanged concerned glances. Their maknae had been locked in her room for hours, and they could hear her occasional outbursts of frustration.

Jihyo, as the group's leader and Y/N's mama, decided to check on her. She knocked gently on her kid's door before entering. 

Jihyo - Baby, are you alright?

The mentioned girl looked up from her laptop, her eyes red from stress and exhaustion. 

Y/N - I don't know, omma. This college workload is driving me insane. *tears up*

Jihyo approached and sat down beside Y/N, offering a comforting smile. 

Jihyo - You don't have to go through this alone, my love. We're all here for you.

Y/N sighed, feeling a mixture of gratitude and guilt. 

Y/N - I know, mama... But I hate burdening you all with my college stuff. You have your own schedules and responsibilities.

Jihyo placed a reassuring hand on her youngest child's shoulder.

Jihyo - You're not a burden, honey. We're like a family, and we'll always be here to support you. But if this is too much, maybe we can call Tiffany unnie. She's really smart, and I'm sure she'll help you.

The maknae's eyes brightened at the suggestion. Tiffany was not only her girlfriend but also her rock and her source of strength. She was incredibly intelligent, and the thought of having her by her side made the daunting task ahead seem a little less insurmountable. 

Y/N - Do you think she'd come over? *shining eyes*

Jihyo - I'm sure she would. Let me give her a call. *nodding*

As Jihyo dialled Tiffany's number, Y/N felt a surge of hope. She knew that Tiffany would drop everything to help her, and the thought of having her there was like a lifeline in her turbulent sea of stress.

Meanwhile, Tiffany was in the middle of a dance rehearsal when her phone rang. She glanced at the caller ID and saw that it was Jihyo. Concerned, she quickly picked up. 

Tiffany - Hello?

Jihyo - Hey, Tiffany unnie... *anxious tone* 

Jihyo - Our Y/N is having a bit of a meltdown over her college work. Do you think you could come over and help her out?

Tiffany's heart sank at the news. She loved her girl more than anything, and the idea of her being upset tore at her. 

Tiffany - Of course, Jihyo. I'll be there as soon as I can.

With a sense of urgency, Tiffany left the practice room and headed toward the TWICE dorm. Her mind raced with worry about what might have caused her lovely girlfriend to reach this breaking point.

Back at the dorm, Y/N anxiously paced back and forth in her room, her anxiety growing with every passing moment. She couldn't shake the feeling that she was drowning in her college work. The pressure was suffocating, and it felt like a heavy weight on her chest.

When the doorbell rang, Y/N practically sprinted to answer it. She swung the door open and was greeted by the sight of Tiffany, her saviour and partner, standing there with a comforting smile.

Tiffany enveloped TWICE's honeybee in a warm hug, and she buried her face in Tiffany's shoulder, letting out a shaky breath. 

Y/N - I'm so glad you're here, Tiffy.

Tiffany pulled back slightly to cup Y/N's face, brushing away a tear that had escaped. 

Tiffany - I'll always be here for you, babe. Now, show me this daunting college work of yours.

Y/N led Tiffany to her room, where the textbooks and papers were scattered like a hurricane had torn through. Tiffany took a deep breath and began sorting through the chaos, trying to make sense of it all.

As she explained some of the concepts and worked through the assignments with Y/N, Tiffany couldn't help but admire her girlfriend's dedication and intelligence. Y/N's determination was one of the things that had drawn Tiffany to her in the first place.

Tiffany - You're doing great, boo. Let's tackle this step by step. *encouraging smile*

With Tiffany's patient guidance, the maknae gradually regained her confidence. They worked through each assignment together, and the younger girl's anxiety began to ebb away. Tiffany's presence was like a soothing balm for her frayed nerves.

As the hours passed, the other TWICE members checked in on them, bringing snacks and words of encouragement. They were relieved to see their youngest smiling and making progress with Tiffany's help.

By the time they had finished, Y/N's college work was complete, and she felt a sense of accomplishment she hadn't felt in days. She looked at Tiffany with gratitude shining in her eyes.

Y/N - I couldn't have done this without you, Tiffy.

Tiffany brushed a strand of hair away from Y/N's face and kissed her forehead. 

Tiffany - I'll always be here to help you, my luv. You're never alone in this.

Y/N hugged Tiffany tightly, her heart overflowing with love and relief. 

Y/N - I love you so much, Tiffy.

Tiffany - I love you too, my dear. *whispering as she held her girl close*

The night wore on, and as Y/N drifted off to sleep, she couldn't help but feel incredibly fortunate to have Tiffany by her side. With her girlfriend's unwavering support, she knew she could conquer any challenge that came her way, whether it was college assignments or the demanding life of an idol.

And as for TWICE, they couldn't have been happier to see their youngest member smiling again, knowing that they were all there for each other through thick and thin. This made them all share the same thought:

We are proud of our dear maknae.

A/N: I’m sorry for any errors, English is not my first language. Pls, let me know if there is something wrong, ty for reading <3

[phantasmagoria-galore]

windrunner. devlog#4

hi everyone! not much has happened since the last update, I wrote another small chunk of chapter 1, but didn't manage to do much else because of my workload. it's been really frustrating lately.

for other news, I've decided to redraw the character sprites with adding some lineart to them. possibly the UI too. haven't decided on backgrounds yet, because god these are a pain.

the reason I made everything lineless at first was because I didn't feel very confident in my linework, used to hate the way it looked and decided to dabble a bit into a new artstyle I thought was really cool.

however, when I opened my character sprites a few days ago, I hated the way it looked even more lol

getting ready for otome jam 2024 helped me to improve my drawing skill a lot, so I hope it will help me to create something I can finally like.

I started from redrawing Gwen, so here's the new version of her

[budgetbuildsystem]

I'm just a ball of anxiety right now. So I got a new job cleaning aisle in a wearhouse, pays well and the hours are pretty good. Me and my cousin both work there but she's janitorial.

Needed context: In one building there is a breakroom, a male and female bathroom, and offices that need to be done. Depending on the building, these places get dirty much faster than other buildings. Buildings 2, and 3 are the most trafficked areas. My cousin does buildings 1, 2, and usually 3 and is expected to lap them twice in 8 hours. Today she didn't do 3 at all because the manager and supervisor were going to work on it. The other janitor does building 4 and another area. Which task wise only equates to doing building 2 as both are low traffic areas.

Our manager has given her FAR too much work and has now written her up for not finishing it all. Today 2 people, our manager and our supervisor, worked solely on building 3. Well... it took them 5hours to make 2 laps. Yet my cousin is expected to make 2 laps of 2 buildings in 8 hours? And she works alone often skipping breaks and sometimes her lunch because she get reprimanded for not getting everything done (she often skips tasks in order to move on in a timely manner and has begun writing down minute accurate time stamps for every task she does to prove she physically can't get everything done.) I wasn't feeling good today and told my cousin I may need to take a point and go home.

Well my cousin messages asking where our manager is because she's not responding, I mentioned to my manager who was nearby that someone was trying to contact her and she actually was annoyed when she saw my cousin called (mind you she is awful at responding in a timely manner. Everyone struggles to contact her during the day.) . And rather than just responding told me to tell my cousin if she needs the manager she can come to building 3. I was already anxious because I could see and feel the annoyance. And I literally heard her talking crap about my cousin to the supervisor.

Well after that break I finally got sick and lost my breakfast. I let my manager know I needed to head home and her whole demeanor felt annoyed and pissed off. Her face just screamed annoyed despite her words being kind. Well I've been home a while now, still struggling with the anxiety and had told my cousin everything. Well my cousin texted a but ago saying there was a bit of an argument about their work load and our manager tried to compare buildings 1, 2, and 3 to doing 4 and the other area. MIND YOU HER AND ONE OTHER PERSON TOOK 5 HOURS TO LAP 1 BUILDING TWICE. She actually asked my cousin to leave the room after they attempted to explain that no the other guys workload is more equivalent to building 2. I was already planning on calling out tomorrow due to mental exhaustion (and now sickness) but now I'm both scared to call out and scared to go in.

That argument had been building for weeks as my cousin has desperately tried to explain that the work is too much for her but the manager never listens.

[dari-ede]

In the Middle of the Night: Chapter 24

Chapter 24: "Si lo forzás se marchita"

Chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30

MASTERLIST

AN: And it’s back! Thank you everyone for your patience. It’s been quite the 2 months. Hopefully, I’ll be able to come back to a regular weekly, or at least Bi-weekly, posting. Happy reading! 🥰

Summary: As Bangtan prepares for a new chapter in their lives, they head to their private property in the forest for a songwriting workshop. As a songwriter and producer they have worked with for years, I’m asked to tag along. I was ready for the heavy workload and small amount of sleep during the workshop week. However, I wasn’t ready for the storm that came that changed my friendship with Namjoon forever.

Pairing: Idol!RM/Namjoon x OFC

Genre: Friends to Lovers, Fluff and Smut

Rating: M (mention of sexual assault, explicit language, sexual scenes in prior chapters)

Status: COMPLETE

Trigger warnings: hurt, heartache, anxiety (there are a lot of feels in this one)

Warnings: a BRIEF description of sexual assault (look for ***)

*****************

I don’t think I have ever cried as much as I did on that first day. There was a tightness in my chest like I was trying to breathe underwater. My ribs felt cracked from the numerous attempts of taking in a full breath. My lungs weren’t getting enough oxygen, the sobbing made it hard to. When my mouth would open, at first I thought it was to absorb the colorless gas my body needed to survive but instead, it was to let out sounds I had never heard myself make. It was a siren-type wail. I felt like La Llorona, searching for the person I cared most for but couldn’t find. Couldn’t find him because the monster inside me had caused him to leave. I had caused the destruction. I had murdered what I treasured most. I was the reason for my own pain.

I wanted nothing more than to call him. I would grovel and beg—whatever he wanted, I would do. Whatever demands he had, I would obediently follow. I would do it all just to have him back. To have him close.

I didn’t care how pathetic I sounded. Didn’t care how wrecked I looked.

I just wanted to breathe again. And he was the source of it.

It was in those first hours of crying out in agony that I realized the truth of what Namjoon had become for me. He had become the most vital chemical element to keep my body alive: oxygen. The little air I was able to inhale felt so wrong, almost poisonous. Rather than healing me, it was slowly killing me.

Fuck, I was so pitiful.

I was in pieces for a guy who didn’t feel the same for me as I did for him. Didn’t see a proper woman he wanted to be with. Didn’t recognize me as a person to respect.

“You’ve given it up easy before.”

Fresh, boiling tears made their way down my overheated face as the words echoed over and over and over. The siren came back out.

My stomach began to cramp from the shaking. My body automatically curled up, trying to ease the pain.

I think that’s how my tia found me.

At first, I didn’t recognize the voice. It sounded too high, too screechy. Tia Jia was normally so calm and sweet sounding. Had it not been for the familiar smell of orange blossom, I wouldn’t have known it was her.

I’m not sure where she found me, but I was certain it wasn’t in my room. I don’t know how I managed to drive myself home that night, but I remember parking. I recall entering my house. I think I might have sat on the couch? The living room was the last thing I remembered physically seeing. Everything after was a blur—literally. The tears made it difficult to see anything.

The next time I recognized my surroundings, I was in my bed.

My head felt like it was splitting into pieces, but I was aware of my aunt holding me. Her scent and embrace sent a bit of warmth through me. When I realized she was there, I only cried harder. It was like I was a toddler and the only way I would feel better was through her touch and words. That’s what moms are for, right? To erase all the pain and make everything better?

I clutched her desperately. Praying she would be able to eradicate the ache.

But after what seemed an eternity, it was still there. The fucking pain was still present. It was the first time in my memory that my tia Jia couldn’t make it better. And this made my chest shatter. The siren in me wailed until my vocals gave.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Sweetheart, you have to eat.”

My tia Jia was sitting next to me in my bed, a tray on her lap.

The motherly strokes on my hair were comforting, but still not enough. It had been a while since my body exhausted itself. Tears were still coming out and my stomach, chest, and head still felt like they had gone through a car crash, but at least the wailing and shaking stopped. I could take normal breaths now, even though it still felt wrong.

“Sweetheart?” Tia Jia’s voice sounded strained, like in pain. I was alert enough to detect it.

There was another kick to the stomach. I felt guilty for my state. It must be tough on her. I could at least answer her. “No, thank you,” I let out. It hurt to speak.

My aunt heard the scratchiness in my voice. “At least have some water. Please.”

She sounded so desperate. I couldn’t say no. I lifted my hand, motioning for the water.

She quickly handed me the flask, which thankfully had a straw attached to it. I wouldn’t have to sit up to drink from it. Bringing the straw to my lips, I took a sip. My throat and dehydrated skin welcomed it. I was about to put it back down, but my logical mind forced my mouth to take at least one more long sip.

Closing the straw, I set down the flask next to me.

There was silence for a while again. The only thing I could feel was my tia’s touch on my hair and face.

Finally, she spoke up. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Warm, new tears flowed down my cheeks.

“Did something happen with Namjoon?” she asked, gently.

I sniffed. “He broke it off.”

She let out a pained sigh. “Why?”

“I can’t do this, Maya. I can’t be in a relationship where it’s just about sex. I want more.”

New sobs began to make their way through my chest and traveled up my throat and down my eyes. “I’m not what he wants.”

It felt like a knife cut into my chest again. My old wounds still had not healed, so they quickly reopened.

Many years ago I developed a crush on Namjoon. I was quick to recognize it. However, for many reasons, I suppressed those emotions. One of those reasons had been that I knew I wasn’t his type. Physically or emotionally. Sure, he had eventually found me attractive and he started to develop a crush on me back. But he had realized last night I wasn’t built to be someone he could have a relationship with.

Namjoon was someone who loved to talk about philosophy and the human condition. We shared plenty of deep conversations, but I had never been able to fully let him in. There would always be a wall that prevented him from fully entering. And I just couldn’t take it down.

I explained little bits to my tia Jia about what Namjoon had said. I mentioned how my mother had called about the fucker. I admitted that I was still unable to talk to Namjoon about the incident and I wasn’t entirely sure if I wanted to tell him about it. It was because of all my issues that made Namjoon not want me.

I curled into a ball as I finished my story to my tia. My stomach aches were starting again and my heart was racing pretty fast.

My tia applied some pressure on my chest. “Breathe, sweetheart. Breathe.”

I followed her instructions. It took a few minutes but I had settled down again.

When my aunt felt safe to speak again, she did. “Sweetheart…what is keeping you from being fully transparent with Namjoon?”

I gave a pathetic shrug and didn’t answer. I knew it was a childish response.

“Well, I think it would be a good thing to figure out, don’t you think so?” she lightly pressed.

“Even if I did open up, I’m not what he wants, tia,” I mumbled.

“Now what would make you say that?” There was a bit of chiding in her tone.

“Because he’s known me for how long and I just now started catching his eye? He only became interested in me because I was the only girl around him who was available. After his bad break up, he’s been looking for a rebound.” I was finally voicing fleeting thoughts I had had in the starting part of my relationship with Namjoon. These thoughts had never lingered for too long, but in a state of complete low, my self-pity was scrapping for any negativity it could find.

My aunt wasn’t about to let me swim in that self-pity, though. “That breakup happened two years ago. His rebound was that girl he dated briefly earlier in the year. You are not his rebound.”

There was silence again.

My brain internally battled with my broken heart. Logically, I believed my tia Jia’s words, but the ache in my chest was marinading in the words that had shattered me.

“You’ve given it up easily before, whatever. I’m not that way.”

“The fact that…you did that with me…. I just don’t know how to feel about that.”

“We started this wrong. But like a fucking horndog, I gave in.”

“I can’t even say we can go back to being friends because I can’t. I can’t and won’t go back to that. I respect myself too much.”

“He still doesn’t want to be with me,” I said as my throat tightened. “It doesn’t matter if I tell him what he wants to hear. At the end of the day, my self-respect apparently doesn’t align with his. I’ll always be the girl who took it up the ass.”

“What?” Tia Jia asked, thrown off.

I hadn’t shared this piece of information with my aunt. The detail was a little too intimate for me to have shared with her. But I had spilled the beans; she couldn’t unhear it and I couldn’t unsay it.

“We had sex before the fight—before my mother called. It was anal.” I felt a flush of embarrassment hit my cheeks and neck, but I continued speaking. “During the fight, he brought up how he valued the act we had committed and I didn’t. I'm just a slut in his eyes.”

“He did not call you that,” my tia said with conviction. But then a beat later, she doubted herself. “Did he?”

“He might as well have,” I said in a small voice.

“Oh, sweetheart,” she said simply. She didn’t say anything else, though. This time, she let me cry and wallow in my self-pity.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I honestly couldn’t remember how that night went. I mostly stayed in my room. My tia stayed the night with me. I caught her a couple of times on my phone. I was sure she was taking care of things for me, not that I had a lot of meetings. I might have had one, but I honestly couldn’t care less about it.

I was grateful she was there to handle it.

I had never felt this vulnerable before. Never been so pathetic. The last time I felt this low had been many years ago when my cousin died. But that had been a different kind of heartache. I dealt with the death mostly in anger. This time, there was no one but me to be angry at.

And as much as I wanted to bathe in self-anger, I couldn’t. Sorrow was all I could feel.

My tia eventually had to leave. “Your Uncle John has an appointment, sweetheart. If you want, I can come right after.”

I shook my head at her. “I’m good.”

She stared at the food next to me on the bed. “At least eat the vegetables, please. You didn’t eat dinner last night and this morning, you only had a few grapes. Lunch was left completely untouched. The least you can do is eat the vegetables.”

I reached out to my plate and grabbed a celery, taking a bite without a word.

“Thank you,” she said genuinely. She began to gather her things. “If you need anything, just go downstairs. Someone’s here to keep an eye on you.”

I wanted to argue with her and tell her I didn’t need looking after. I was positive she had called Jenny, her daughter and my best friend from childhood, to come look after me. However, I knew my tia well enough to know it would do no good.

She came around and gave me a soft kiss. “I’m only a phone call away. Do you want your cell with you?” she asked as she motioned towards my night table.

I shook my head. It was getting close to it being 48 hours since I touched that thing. I wanted to stay away from it for as long as possible.

“Love you,” she said as she disappeared into the hall.

I rolled over and closed my eyes, hoping sleep would come fast.

It did manage to come for several hours but my body had had enough of it. When I woke up, the stars had replaced the sun in the sky. There was a sudden sharp pain in my head. My body was angry at me for neglecting it. I pushed off the bed and felt an immediate cold.

I put on some pajama bottoms and put on thick socks. I think I had showered sometime yesterday because I surprisingly didn’t feel crusty. I touched my hair, feeling it damp. It was the confirmation I needed that I had, in fact showered sometime in the last 24 hours. Sometimes, I tended to put my hair up in a bun right after showering. This only prolonged my thick hair from fully drying.

After applying more layers of clothes and being grateful for not smelling, I took the plate of food that was still on my bed and took my water flask. Maybe I could microwave the food.

As I made my way down the hall, I adjusted the thermostat to warm up the house and went to get my food reheated.

Coming closer to the kitchen, I noticed the lights were on. After entering, I quickly saw the refrigerator open and a person standing behind it. Jenny must be up for a late-night snack.

“Don’t eat the cake; it’s gone bad,” I warned.

“I’m not craving sweets anyway,” came a deep and husky voice.

My heart stopped, panicking. I didn’t recognize the voice right away, so I acted on instinct. I placed down my food and took hold of the nearest, heavy object.

Before I could demand who was in my house, Yoongi’s head popped out from the other side of the fridge.

I let out a heavy and relieved sigh. “Son of a bitch, Yoongi. You scared the shit out of me.” I set down the heavy object, which turned out to be a rather pricey jar. Thank god I hadn’t used it. That would have been an expensive mistake.

He frowned. “I thought eomeonim told you I was here.”

I had completely forgotten I had invited Yoongi and his team to stay at my house. I had mentioned it to my Tia Jia after Yoongi agreed to stay over. The day we decided on Yoongi coming over, I was set to have a meeting. Tia Jia was going to be here to let Yoongi and the two guys in. That must have been last night. Or this morning. Shit, what day were we on?

I rubbed my head, feeling the sharp pain in my head again.

“Hungry?” Yoongi asked, a small hint of concern in his voice.

I nodded. “I was going to heat this up,” I said, motioning to the food.

He stared at the plate for a moment, no emotion given. Then reached over, took it, and placed it away from me. “Want a sandwich?” he asked as he turned around to the refrigerator again.

“It’s fine. I can just heat up the plate.”

“It’s gone bad.”

“Since when are you picky?” I asked, feeling irritated all of a sudden. “I’ve eaten pizza that’s been sitting out for 2 days.”

“Bet your stomach didn’t feel proud about that,” he muttered, taking out ingredients.

“I’m alive still, aren’t I?” I shot back.

He turned to me and did a once-over on me. He shook his head in disbelief. “Have you looked in the mirror? You look like death.”

I flipped him off.

That made him crack a smile. He reached for my water flask and filled it up.

I gladly took it, drinking a long sip.

We were quiet for a while as he put together a sandwich for me. Yoongi and I had eaten together plenty of times, not to mention cooked alongside one another. He knew my preferences.

After a long moment, he finally spoke up. “How you feeling?”

I took a breath, starting to feel my stomach get queasy. “Like shit,” I said genuinely.

I felt his eyes on me. He went still for a long moment, probably assessing what he could and should say.

There was a yearning in me that wanted to ask Yoongi about Namjoon. Fuck, just thinking of his name squeezed at my chest. An image of his beautiful dimples crossed my mind. The cluster of freckles across his nose and eyes would turn into a constellation whenever he smiled a certain way. But then the red eyes that were so full of hurt that night replaced the image, breaking my heart all over again.

The sound of a plate being placed down made me snap to the present. In front of me was a very good-looking sandwich. I knew Yoongi’s skills enough to know it was delicious. Yet, I had little interest in eating it. I knew my body needed to eat, so I took a few bites. I tasted the flavors of the ingredients and knew they were a perfect fusion, but I still felt zero enthusiasm for it. I managed to eat half of it, my stomach somewhat satisfied. After a few more sips of water, I felt the headache start to wear off.

When Yoongi noticed I was done eating, he finally spoke up. “Want to talk about it?”

It was strange because I did and I didn’t. I didn’t want to relive that night. But I also knew I needed to let out my emotions.

I took a breath and tried to control the tears that started to form in my eyes. “I can’t give him what he wants.” Saying the truth out loud hurt a lot more than just thinking about it.

He was silent for a moment before he spoke. “And what does he want?”

The warm tears made their way down. “Not me.”

There was silence for a long moment. The truth lingered in the air and pressed down on me.

After a long moment, Yoongi finally spoke. “Namjoon very rarely goes after something he is not sure about.”

There was almost a somber look on his face. He wasn’t looking at me, but in so many ways, it certainly felt like he was looking right into my eyes.

“He wants you, Maya.”

Conflicting emotions ran through me at hearing this. I knew Yoongi well enough to know that he was always honest. He would never say something he didn’t mean just to spare my feelings or make me feel better. But then Namjoon’s words the other night echoed in my head, telling me that I wasn’t what Namjoon wanted. It was so hard to think clearly.

“You don’t think he does.” Yoongi’s voice was soft and certain.

I gave a short nod, not trusting myself to speak without becoming a sobbing mess.

Yoongi let out a heavy sigh. “Sad.”

I was confused about what he meant by that. But, again, I was too scared to use words at the moment.

He stayed in the kitchen with me as I picked through my food. Eventually, we made our way over to the backyard where he drank his whisky into the night and I curled on the outside couch and looked up into the dark sky. I searched through the constellations, trying to find the freckles that would hopefully give me some solace.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next couple of days passed slowly. My tia called several times, checking on me. I didn’t stay long with her on the phone, finding my throat too sore to speak for too long.

She didn’t push it. For a brief moment, I was a little confused why she wasn’t calling more often or insisting I stay on the phone with her longer. However, I noticed how closely Yoongi observed me. He usually was in the room with me or in the next room. I caught him texting a lot.

He used his phone for researching random facts, watching movies, documentaries, and playing odd mobile games. He had plenty of friends he messaged. Yes, he was usually glued to his phone, but I still noticed he was on it more than usual. I was certain he was keeping Tia Jia up to date about me.

Had his staff been around, I would have felt embarrassed about being treated like some fragile kid, but thankfully, Yoongi had sent them away insisting they explore the city on their own. A part of me wondered if they had heard about my walk of shame. Did they hear about how I had left Namjoon’s hotel room looking like some cheap whore?

The sting lingered throughout my chest, cracking my ribs.

“Wanna go for a walk?” Yoongi asked, pulling me away from my heartache.

It was night and I lived in a secluded area. Even if we came across other people, they wouldn’t be able to see us clearly. They wouldn’t notice Yoongi. I thought for a moment, debating with myself. I hadn’t left my house in days; hadn’t seen other faces. I had been bathing in my self-pity for many nights. Maybe it was time I snapped out of it. A walk would be good.

After nodding, we got ourselves ready and headed toward the beach.

We walked along the sand for a long while, and no words were said.

Eventually, Yoongi spoke. “How you feeling?”

Since the first night he had arrived, he asked me this towards the end of the day.

I gave a shrug. “A little better.”

He gave a nod. “Have you gone through your messages yet?” he asked carefully.

I had confessed to him yesterday morning I hadn’t looked through my messages since that night. I was scared to see Namjoon’s name on it—I couldn’t deal with reading through his words. Would they cut deeper? Bury me lower than I already was?

But what if he hadn’t written me? Somehow, his sending me nothing would be much worse.

Looking through my messages right now wouldn’t do me any good. I shook my head.

Yoongi let out a heavy sigh, similar to the one he had given the other night.

The scene replayed in my head and I remembered my unspoken question. I couldn’t ask it that night, but I could tonight. “What did you mean when you said ‘sad’ the other night?”

Yoongi was quiet for a moment. It was like he was thinking about his words carefully before speaking to them out loud. “I find it sad that you’re not allowing someone to truly see you.”

I was too stunned by his words to give a vocal response. My head turned to him, wondering if he was going to further elaborate.

He did. Keeping his eyes ahead, he continued his walk and I kept up. “As a friend of yours, I’ve seen parts of you—some of them aren’t great qualities—and still, I love you.”

Tears came to my eyes. It was rare to hear Yoongi tell me he loved me. Any time he did, it would move me because I knew it wasn't easy for him.

“You’ve been around Namjoon during some of his bad moments; moments that would paint him negatively. Do you feel differently about him—knowing and witnessing his bad qualities?”

Shaking I said softly but strongly, “No.”

“How do you feel after seeing him make mistakes and show his flaws?”

Moments of bad decisions Namjoon had made in his past crossed my mind. Yoongi’s question lingered throughout the memories. And all I could feel was my heart grow warm and expand.

I could feel Yoongi’s eyes on me. I hadn’t said a thing but seemed to be hearing my thoughts. “That’s what it means to care about someone—to accept the good and the bad. Whatever shit you’re afraid of in your past, fuck it. Don’t let it keep you from allowing someone amazing like Namjoon in.”

Suddenly, the face of the fucker entered my mind.

******His hands on me. I sat frozen, feeling my body lit up in flames.*******

Was the fucker the reason why I had this goddamn wall up? I thought I had moved on from him. Had he crept back into my subconscious and made me vulnerable again? Was he the reason why a wall existed that prevented me from allowing Namjoon in?

These last few days I thought it was just the way I was built. I could never be what Namjoon needed. I wasn’t made to let someone fully in. Having gone through therapy years ago I thought that I had grown as much as I could have.

I felt the arms around me before the tears. It wasn’t until Yoongi was hugging me that I noticed I had been crying. My face was wet, my nose was runny.

“It’s not just Namjoon that would like to break down that wall,” Yoongi said softly as he held me. “We all notice it. Some of us understand on a more personal level than others, unfortunately."

We shared a knowing look. He was meaning himself. Yoongi also had his wall. 

"You feel it's easier to keep people at a distance," he said, holding eye contact. "The guys taught me differently."

I looked away, feeling a bit of shame for having my faults.

Yoongi kept talking. "The guys and I normally never push—Namjoon especially. He respects boundaries. He allows everyone to open up at their own pace. But it's different with you. He needs more. And I believe you need more, too.”

Suddenly, my heartache grew. It was no longer just about a breakup. It was about learning that I was broken.

I needed fixing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I picked up my phone. My finger hovered over my KakaoTalk app. Dozens of notifications were still unread. Were any of them from Namjoon?

As much as I wanted to look through them, I knew deep down I shouldn’t click on them.

Not yet.

My finger moved over to Contacts, selecting and calling the person I was needing the most.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My eyes were focused on the assistant’s desk. Since walking through the door, the feeling of déjà vu had been lingering through the air.

The lobby had remained the same. The portraits on the walls hadn’t changed. The couch I was sitting on was the same one as years ago.

I clutched my phone, this time having no one on the other end that was cheering me on for being where I was.

The urge to turn my phone on and go directly to my messages was strong. But like I had the other million times, I ignored it.

In my deluded, damaged mind I saw him sitting next to me. His dimples were deep and beautiful. That proud look was written all over his face.

“Hi, Maya. Come on in,” Dr. Rob said gently with a kind smile.

I returned the smile and got to my feet. As I made my way into his office, I could clearly hear Namjoon’s deep, timber voice behind me.

“hwaiting!”

As pathetic as it appeared, it worked. I felt a sudden burst of courage.

---------------

MASTERLIST

Chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30

[thessalian]

Thess vs The Placenta Guy

It says something about my life that while I do know all the names of the Undesirables I type for (because no one else wants to), the only nickname I really have for any of them is the one for who I can only call The Placenta Guy.

Look, the man does absolutely nothing but placenta cut-ups. Now, the thing about placenta cut-ups is that while they're booked under the mother's name, obviously you need to know a lot about the child (or children, if twins or something) when you're doing these, because you're generally trying to identify a placental cause for any issues that took place during the birth. Thus you have a triage form, which is mostly handwritten and generally fiddly and needs to be done every single time. Now, I used to be able to just copy from the form, but the new iteration of the system we're using is a mess - think badly designed website with large banner boxes that will not go away and get in the way of everything - and it's even worse on a small screen - say, a laptop screen. I'm contemplating asking for a USB-connective screen because the whole thing is a disaster on legs for me most of the time. But I've been coping as best I can because things are enough of a mess right now and I honestly don't want to make any kind of request this close to the holidays anyway.

Anyway. Point is that while placenta cut-ups are fiddly and annoying, they generally aren't urgent. So they sit in a pile until someone gets to them, and that someone kind of dumps them in all at once. But with the workload we've been having lately, there doesn't seem to have been time set aside to just sit down and do them. Instead, we have The Placenta Guy, staying after hours to dump whole bunches of them in the queue at once. First was Thursday night between 6-7pm. So I log in today, because more fucking overtime because there really is too much mess right now, and guess what? He was in for a couple of hours in the late morning / early afternoon, dumping another nearly dozen placenta reports into the queue. [EDIT: I tell a lie. He's still there, and the number of placenta cut-ups in the queue for today is now up to 15. He hasn't dropped one into the queue for about 15 minutes but these take awhile to do so that means nothing.] So they've got this guy pulling overtime to get the placenta cut-ups done, and me pulling overtime to get the reports for them typed. Because honestly, he's stayed late on other days and the other secretaries have just skipped them en masse to leave me to deal with them. Because gods forbid they make my life even the tiniest bit easier.

Right. I'll probably be stuck with at least Thursday night's offerings from The Placenta Guy, but the ones he put on the system today are problems for the rest of the girls on Monday. I am so fed up with being left with the annoyances, especially when I'm working overtime while still ill because they can't pick up the pace and our managers can't hire the help we clearly desperately need or even give this one secretary more hours, even though she's been begging for more hours. Why will they not give her the hours she obviously wants while making the disabled staffer pull overtime? I guess my work from home set-up works against me.

I'm stalling and avoiding, I know. But I'm looking down the barrel of a whole lot of work from The Placenta Guy because I'm basically at Thursday night's mess, and I don't want to. And of course they're all in a clump so unless I type them out of order, I'm stuck with the whole bunch of them one after the other. I swear, if they're going to have junior doctors dump this many longish reports into the queue well after hours on top of having all the junior doctors come in an hour before the secretaries do and leave one hour after the secretaries do, no fucking wonder we're always behind, even without the "unexpected absences". Which means this is going to be a cycle of me getting tortured with hours I should not be doing. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

Oh, and to top it all off, turns out that the electrician my stepfather has coming in to replace the fuse boxes in here is coming at 8am, not 8:30 as previously stated. Apparently the electrician wants to come in earlier because "there's at least some light" (not the way this flat is located, there isn't; not at 8am in late November, but eh) and my stepfather will not tell him, "No, you said 8:30 so it's 8:30". Which is bullshit but never mind. Still means a half-hour less sleep. Though my stepfather did say I could crash in their spare room on Sunday night so I don't get disturbed, but ... no. I want my own bed. Besides, with this cold/flu thing I'm still suffering with, I'd probably snore like a fucking buzzsaw and I won't disturb anyone else that way if I can avoid it. Besides, it's yet more time without my computer.

Everything about this entire weekend blows dead goats for nickels.

[moe-broey]

The Zeniths........... (or as they're formally known: Zenith Guild)

I have some fun lore (very loose) about them too!

> Lio and Nia are childhood friends who both transed their genders and ended up having matching cat names (did they do that intentionally...?)

> Lio is driven by the pursuit of knowledge, his greatest desire and passion being uncovering mysteries. Above all, he seeks the truth. He does have a one-track mind about it, willing to go to dubious lengths to achieve this.

> Nia's passions include pretty much anything outdoorsy. She has a great love of adventure and everything that goes into it -- managing resources, foraging, hunting, camping. They'll follow Lio wherever he goes.

> Xane and Alex are siblings who travel together -- one, a humble street performer, the other, a traveling doctor. Alex was highly ambitious, but is currently in their burnout era. Xane has always been a nonchalant ne'er-do-well who seemingly does fuck all. Upon closer inspection, it seems he puts away a lot of his money from performing and uses it to support Alex's pursuits.

> Xane and Alex have a bit of an odd dynamic. Alex, the younger one, seems to be the authority and decision maker of the two. Xane, on the other hand, is far more wishy-washy and carefree, to the point of coming off careless. They look after Alex way more than they let on, though.

> Lilith looks to be the odd one out. She traveled alone for a while, long enough to have a sense of independence, but not so long that she didn't feel the sting. She's extremely ambitious and is very much an overachiever -- no, it has nothing to do with her small stature! And how (infuriatingly!) people underestimate her or even worse, treat her like a kid! (She is around the same age as her peers -- just small.) She has NOTHING to prove. Often, she'll take on double the workload, adventuring with two separate parties.

> Another tidbit about Lilith: The alchemist machinery on her arms doubles as weapons to wield magic and as prosthetics. Her being disabled adds to her deep need to "prove" herself and outperform everyone.

> And one tidbit about Lio: While everyone's classes are reflective of who they are, what they strive to be, what they're passionate about and how that reflects in the expression of self -- Lio is a Dark Hunter simply because of aesthetics. He's just like that. His egg cracked, he got top surgery, and decided he's never wearing a proper shirt ever again and also he needs to be 90% sexier (trans vanity stage). Though could it be a premonition as well...?

A lot of how they ended up as one team was luck and chance encounters. Lio and Nia are forced to seek more party members as they struggle to keep up and stay alive, just the two of them. Very occasionally, Alex will wander around the outskirts of the labyrinth to heal anyone who was lucky enough to get out, but not so lucky to do so unscathed. At the bar, or in the street, Xane will wander and perform. He becomes a fairly reliable source of information, rumors, and connections. Lilith has been simultaneously guild hopping and traveling alone, trying to find her place. I think, they all end up connected somehow through strings and domino effects before they officially all band together!

Additional thoughts that get somewhat spoilery (EO1 plot-wise) --

I HATE. THE FOREST FOLK ARC AND HOW IT PLAYS OUT SO BAD. But for Zenith, I think it lends itself to some interesting characterization:

> Lio is fully ready to disband Zenith and carry out the mission himself. To completely uncover the mystery of the labyrinth, he's convinced himself he can play both sides while under the finger of Radha Hall. A few things are going on in his mind: The ends justify the means (it really doesn't.), him disbanding Zenith is altruistic (sparing his allies and taking all the responsibility himself), him thinking if he can minimize the damage done (avoiding all the fights he can, only fighting when there's no other option) then it's okay actually (now, I don't think that it is LMFAO). Still, all of this shows how far he's willing to go, how he thinks he can outsmart it, and how he justifies it.

Zenith, however, does not disband. Because:

> As said earlier, wherever Lio goes, Nia follows. Which shows just how far NIA is willing to go, and just how unflinchingly loyal they are to Lio.

> Lilith had been fighting to find her place for so long, probably has some abandonment issues to boot. She has finally found a group of people who see her as an equal, value her contributions while never undermining them, and even look after her and care for her -- valuing her as a person. She is not letting go of that.

> Alex develops a kinship with Lilith, as an ex-overachiever now burnout. And, of course, Alex has formed strong bonds with Nia and Lio, too. While Alex is the hardest to convince, I think Alex's deciding factor is Lilith, whether they admit it or not ("You guys are gonna die out there. Like. Super dead.") Were it not for Lilith, they would have dipped and cut their losses.

> Xane's deciding factor is always Alex. Wherever Alex goes, Xane follows.

[authorwithissues]

I'm frustrated.... and I feel like furniture.

I've been at this job for 4 months now. I still have a hard time with traffic so I'm still 5-10 minutes late now and then, but otherwise I've got this pretty much down. I mostly know what I'm doing and I'm getting to a decent speed on it too. Our customers know I'm the one to talk to and I'm generally able to supply whatever answers. We're a little busier now so I'm not spending 80% of the day bored out of my mind, but I'm also not slogging through an unreasonable workload. So the work's pretty good.

But the workplace...

I have 4 coworkers. One, I've spoken to once. He sits in the corner farthest from me and is v quiet and works from home half the week so 🤷‍♂️. Another, sits in the cube next to me and she'll chat a bit and ask about my cat, but she's also only in half the week and her lunch is scheduled oddly so I only see her about half the time she is there. We're chill but good. My supervisor sits across from me 5 days a week and he talks at me all day long. And I do mean "at" and not "to". He'll talk and talk about his hobbies, his weekend plans, what he saw on social media, etc. And then there's my manager. He's a private guy, doesn't talk about himself much, but he talks to everyone else about what they've got going on. The guy in the corner he'll quietly chat with all day, he'll check in on the girl next to me, he swings by to talk to my supervisor about anything and everything. He doesn't talk to me.

He'll ask and direct for work stuff which, yeah, is what a manager is supposed to do. But it's rarely positive. And by rarely I mean pretty much never. I was convinced I was going to be fired when my probation was up. I did tell HR that I was frustrated about how he talks to me. He doesn't tell me a bar even exists let alone how high it is until I've apparently failed to clear it. I got scolded because the corner guy made an expensive mistake over the weekend and I??? Didn't catch it???? Apparently I was supposed to be checking and correcting his work???? Because he's apparently bad at it?????????? He's been here for over two years and I'm brand new so 1.) Why is it my job to check his work and 2.) Why would no one tell me it's my job to check his work? and 3.) If he's so consistently bad at this, why hasnt the manager or supervisor stepped in to correct what he's doing wrong????????????? So I got scolded and in my 50 day review it was specifically written down as a miss on /my/ part. I'm still salty about this. I told HR, "I am salty about this." And they must've communicated my frustrations because in my next review he actually said a couple positive things, wonder of all wonders! They're glad I'm here and that I've picked everything up so quickly! I am not on the verge of a firing! And I thought, "Okay! It was probably just a small failure in communication but now that that's been cleared up, we should run smoother :) This will be a Good Job :)"

But it hasn't gotten smoother. Like I said above, the work is fine, but I feel like furniture. My manager will only talk to me about work which. Okay. Not inherently bad. Except. He talks to everyone else about their hobbies their weekends their lives. He comes over to talk to my supervisor about his weekend plans and will stand behind me to talk over my head to him for 10 minutes. I am not invited to join this conversation. I thought, "Well, I've been alone all day for 3 years, my social skills are rusty. I just gotta try harder to catch the social cues and participate more smoothly in conversations with my coworkers is all :)"

But I'm coming to the realization that, yeah, my social skills are rusty, but I'm not completely obtuse. They're not interested in hearing from me. They don't ask me about my hobbies my weekend my life, so I'll bring it up myself. To silence. No response or comment or anything. Okay, so plan b! Engage in my hobbies in a way that would promote engagement, like quilt and sew in the break room and at my desk. The export ladies ask, my coworkers do not. Okay, well let's try plan c! Ask about his hobbies his weekend his life and include a segue into mine. He's excited to talk about his stuff and just steamrolls over any additions I try to make. Okay. Plan d! Just join a conversation! Manager is talking with supervisor over my head again, this time about hiking trails. I make multiple attempts to join. The first one they briefly acknowledge happened before steamrolling along. I keep trying. I keep trying. We're to a point where I have something actually interesting and relevant to contribute and theres a gap so it's perfect! I jump in! And I am furniture. They don't acknowledge or even glance at me, just continue along as if I hadn't spoken at all. I didn't bother finishing the thought I'd started, I just left.

I'm. I'm sad, okay. 3 years of isolation. I knew rejoining daily society was probably going to be a little rough, but I didn't think the people I'd be spending so much of my time with would consider my own life and thoughts just so. Uninteresting as to not even entertain? I don't need to be friends with my coworkers by any means but would the occasional two-sided conversation really be too much to ask?

[anryuuepic]

Beatrice Mukhina Bio

Name: Beatrice Mukhina

Species: Daryan

Race: Bluescale

Role: An Executive-rank member of Winterkill Works, and the leader of its Metalwork Ward. A former employee of Scarab Tower, she was kicked out after her obsession with all things metal began to lead to concerning behavior that the Tower didn’t want to provide a home for. 

Affiliation: Winterkill Works, Scarab Tower

Gender: Female

Age: 29

Height: 5’6

Appearance: Beatrice is a woman of average height with a somewhat plump, stocky build that’s heavier through her hips and thighs. She has short, crimson red hair worn in a neat, feminine cut, blue-gray eyes, and a fondness for wearing the color red. She’s most often seen with a pleasant, excited smile, and gives the impression of someone approachable and kind.

Personality: Above all else, Beatrice is passionate. She loves what she loves with her whole heart, and nothing can stop her from devoting herself to the things she adores. While she’s a decent person in terms of behavior, she’s often willing to overlook things that a truly moral person would object to, especially if it means being able to do something she wants. She’s cheerful and easy to get along with, but by no means a pushover— her nature is stubborn, and she doesn’t take kindly to being pushed around. Whether they’re positive or negative, she doesn’t hold back her feelings, although she will soften the blow a bit for a friend. She’s spent her life being seen as an eccentric, and by now, that’s exactly what she’s come to enjoy. 

Positive Traits: Overall, Beatrice can be called a good person. She’s good-natured, helpful, and relatively compassionate to others, and despite her more self-centered tendencies, she doesn’t go out of her way to do harm. She’s excitable, energetic, and full of whole-hearted intensity for the things she loves, and her good mood easily becomes contagious. When it comes to social interactions, she’s cooperative and easy to get along with, which is more than can be said for most of her coworkers. 

Negative Traits: Beatrice’s worst trait is that, in the end, she only truly cares about her own interests. While she acts perfectly decent, she’ll look past all kinds of horrible things when it means she gets what she wants. Her single-minded passion means that there’s not much room for anyone or anything else in her heart, and many people are fooled by her cheerful exterior into thinking that she’s truly kind. She can be too stubborn for her own good (or anyone else’s) and she’s dangerously independent. 

History: From a young age, Beatrice had an interest in metalwork. And that interest quickly began to consume her. She devoted her life to studying, in the hopes of gaining a place in Scarab Tower... but unfortunately, not long after doing so, they removed her from employment because of concerns over her research. Beatrice didn’t stop there, though, and simply sought out the next place she could find that would allow her to pursue her forbidden passion as she wanted— and that place turned out to be Winterkill Works. 

Relationships: Superficially, Beatrice’s relationships are fine. She’s easy for most people to get along with and generally presents a pleasant, friendly image. However, she doesn’t have many close bonds, and while her subordinates find her a delightful person to work under, both they and her coworkers know by now that she doesn’t actually care much for any of them. She acts kind, but it quickly becomes obvious that she only needs herself.

Interests: Beatrice likes studying, the color red, and metalwork and machinery of all kinds. She dislikes taking breaks, doing nothing, and people who try to contain her. Her sole interest is the passion that consumes everything else in her life— the research of all things made of metal. 

WW Role: As one of the Executives of Winterkill Works, Beatrice has a Ward to manage— and hers specializes in Metalwork. While her job is mainly to oversee general projects and workload there, she also handles higher-tier projects that the common scientists couldn’t accomplish. Her Ward is run smoothly, with high worker morale and excellent productivity. 

Miscellaneous: Beatrice developed a special pair of leather gloves, treated with certain solutions and tipped with an Aura-infused alloy, that allow her to function as an artificial Metal Elemental, though the result is far more clumsy and crude than the real thing. She’s very fond of fashion and her personal appearance, although her taste is a little unusual; she adores the color red, the same as molten metal. Her biggest disappointment in life so far was being kicked out of her job at Scarab Tower. She has trouble with making herself sit still or do nothing, especially for long periods of time. 

Connotative Description: A passionate woman whose mind and life are consumed by an obsession with metal. Good-natured and pleasant on the outside, but only concerned with herself on any level that matters. 

[majestyeverlasting]

Pieces of Us

Pairing: Bucky x Female Reader

Summary: You come home on a Saturday afternoon to jazz in the air. And it isn't long before your new manicure catches Bucky's attention. This blurb is fluff sprinkled with nostalgia and kisses.

Word Count: 843

A/N: In the midst of working on requests, this idea came and I had to get it out. School is going great but the workload is on another level, so I'm happy to be able to post this smaller piece in the meantime. I hope you all are well. Enjoy.

Warm light poured through the blinds, and onto the wood floor in thin, golden streaks. Bucky studied them as he sat in thought. The airy jazz melody flowing throughout the living room had taken him to a period that seemed both a lifetime, and an arm’s length away.

It was Saturday, well into the afternoon, yet he was reminded of the songs his mother used to play on the radio when she would tidy the house after breakfast on Saturday mornings. Music drove her just as much as her love for their little family. Once upon a time, Bucky listened to it whenever he could—dance and sing too, if the moment permitted—all because her own love for music had encouraged his.

When the lock on the apartment door twisted, his gaze flitted to it. You were entering a beat later, eyes bright, and carrying one too many grocery bags. As he pushed himself from the couch to help, he lightheartedly scolded you for not texting him to come down. But you brushed off his words with a smile and shrug as if to say that you’d managed on your own.

It wasn’t until you two started un-bagging the food that Bucky noticed that there was something different about your nails. They were longer. Interesting. He waited until everything was put away to acknowledge them.

A smile found its way onto your face when Bucky took your hands. The two of you were still in the kitchen, and the soft music still navigated its way through apartment. With a small frown of curiosity, he made you stretch out your fingers so he could take a look at the work that had been done. They were nice. The added length made your fingers appear longer and more slender. The shade, a dusty rose, complimented your skin in a way worthy of being deemed classy and elegant.

You met Bucky’s gaze. “Do you like them?”

He hummed. “You’ve never had them like this before. Not that I’ve seen.” He searched your eyes to make sure that assertion was truthful. He was almost certain he never had. He would’ve remembered such a change.

“Yeah, I haven’t had acrylics in forever. Figured I’d go ahead and get them done ‘cause I had time,” you said. “I feel all fancy now.”

He cracked a smile. “You should. They look real nice, doll.” He lifted each of your hands to kiss them. Your skin still smelled faintly of the citrusy lotion that the nail tech massaged into it towards the end of the appointment.

Something about the look in Bucky's eyes shifted. “You know…” he began, “there was something my mom used to do with her nails when I was younger.” His hands came to rest on your waist and, in turn, you wrapped your arms around his neck.

You offered a kind smile and pressed a quick kiss to his chin. “Tell me about it,” you said. “I could listen to you talk about her all day.”

There was a pleasant flutter within his chest. “It was called the 'half moon' manicure. She’d only paint a strip across the middle of her nails. I remember how the red polish looked kinda shiny. And how Rebecca would stand over her shoulder to watch as she painted them. Our dad always complimented her on them too.” His voice had grown measured, as if he were tiptoeing through memories.

You stayed quiet for a bit before murmuring, “I love that.”

He touched his forehead to yours. “I did too.”

Then you pressed your lips to his in a sweet kiss. The jazz was still playing, having transitioned to a new song. Your lips moved together slowly as if taking part in a dance of their own. You could feel him. Everything that he was, everything that he was trying to hold on to. Surely, he felt you too. Your fingers moved to the nape of his neck, nails lightly scratching at the skin. For a fraction of a second, his lips faltered against yours and a shiver coursed down his spine.

He’d have to get used to the longer nails against his skin, he realized.

The kiss eventually reached the end of its life, and he looked down at you intently.

“M’gonna take you out.”

You combed a hand through his hair. “Are you now?”

“Yes. I don’t know where to yet, but I will,” he said. “We’re gonna listen to some good music, dance, enjoy ourselves. You're gonna be in a dress that goes with those pretty nails of yours," he explained. "We'll make some memories to share with our kids one day.”

You gave a playful tilt of your head. “Kids, you say?” It seemed so perfect and impossible that being parents was a reality within your reach.

“Yes, kids.” His lips quirked in amusement. “We’re gonna love ‘em with everything that we’ve got and make sure they always have a whole bunch of pieces of us to hold on to.”

"Sounds good to me."

-

Thanks for reading!

Masterlist / Fluffy Bucky Fics