#because objectively this is very funny

[b0amagination]

"Just- s-stop touching me!"

"Then stop being so touchable."

[theres-whump-in-that-nebula]

Fever Whump Details

Being just as — if not more — uncomfortable closing their eyes and resting as they are keeping them open; because every time they close their eyes, they get caught in a never-ending loop of thought that is just incomprehensible enough to manifest itself as a brightly-colored whirlwind behind their eyes that is more of a bad trip than a fever dream.

Being unable to breathe through their nose forces them to breathe through their mouth, which leads to their becoming severely dehydrated, which leads to feeling nauseous and like their heart is moving their entire body with every beat.

Not being able to talk, but having just enough energy to periodically swear under their breath and say “oh god”

Not being sure if they have a stiff neck from the fever itself, or from pretzeling themselves into uncomfortable positions because of the discomfort

Regretting their life decisions

Feeling like their eyes are getting cooked in their skull because they’re so hot

Knowing they need to spread out their limbs and cool off; but being unable to get their body to stop shoving their hands down their pants or into their armpits to seek warmth

Still being painfully thirsty no matter how much water they drink

Getting nauseous from drinking water

Chugging apple cider vinegar water to get rid of the flu and then having the most awful acid reflux an hour or two later

Having a scabbed over wound that didn’t faze them at all when they received it; but now that they’re sick, makes them gag to look at it

[mushroom-kin]

Morning on the path to Liyue Harbor - A study with original additions

[inkedinserendipity]

rereading system collapse is so funny because murderbot's humans (and its asshole research transport) are like. illogically protective of it. some variation of this interaction happens like four times in fifty pages:

murderbot, standing around and stalling, having a mental breakdown: come on murderbot you gotta be better than this you can't just be having [redacted] do your JOB

ratthi/iris, who know this, distracting it: do those hatches look weird to you? those hatches look weird to me. murderbot, based on your thousands of hours of media consumption, do those hatches look weird to you?

and then to make it worse, feat. poor tarik:

tarik, on a high-stakes mission spearheaded by a secunit who is sending absolutely zero information back to the rest of the crew: ? status update?

iris/ratthi/art-drone, pulling out knives (/bombs): hey tarik? can you leave our murderbot alone? that's our specialest little secunit? it's got anxiety and it's doing its best so fuck off?

and then they start verbally stabbing him.

the amount of glee these scenes give me. i genuinely forgot how quickly they all rally around murderbot. and then there was that scene where murderbot went oh no, was tarik security, i don't want to take his job, and art-drone was like that was NOT his job he was NOT security and actually fuck that guy and YOU are security for my crew and if anything ever happened to you i would BOMB A PLANET

[lgbtlunaverse]

Most annoying NMJ or JC take is when someone that dislikes them is like "oh you're a fan of him? *scoff* Well obviously you've only seen cql, where he was super watered down. In the novel he's a dislikable asshole and that's the objectively superior canon I'm working from instead of your woobified fanfic." Meanwhile your main canon is novel canon and you genuinely find novel Jiang Cheng and Nie Mingjue complex sympathetic characters.

[dapper-lil-arts]

Darlings. is it gay when the phantom you created as a manifestation of your dreadfull loneliness takes the form of one of your closest friends.

Fanart of this pretty good horror rarijack fanfic, "The haunting of carroussel boutique" personaly i am surprised the writer didnt take the chance to point out how fucking funny this is. Me n kim started laughing about it during stream and i just had to draw this

[brodyfoxxsmassivetits]

meant to work on literally anything but instead drew a dubiously shmibibically accurate angle Eduardo.. sure whatev

strange creature... strange weeping.. sad... grieving creature

idk why he's like that I just draw

[quartzitess]

Repost.

Lots of text and ramble in tags.

(Sadly tags are not enough to express how I feel on this. So I'll try and maybe add more in a reblog tomorrow.)

[mourn-and-watch]

solas & mythal were not doomed by the narrative. instead they single-handedly doomed the narrative

[illeaadante]

DP Cult AU

Tour guide for people who randomly showed up in Amity Park: "And, if you look over there, you'll see the home of the mortal form of our God!"

Tour group: [weirded out silence]

Tour Guide: "Oh look! Here his is now!" [picks up Danny like Simba] "Here's our local God!"

Tour group: [looking around for hidden cameras]

Danny: [to the tour guide] You still aren't allowed in my house.

Tour Guide: I know, Lord Phantom.

Danny: Stop calling me that.

Tour Guide: I wouldn't dare, Lord Phantom.

Danny:... at least put me down.

Tour Guide: Right away, Lord Phantom. [puts Danny down and continues the tour like nothing happened]

[ladyofthebookcase]

ranking my owned and used-enough-to-tell ids based on how squishy they are

WHY is a level 40 grips faust so fragile. you could look at her the wrong way and she staggers but it's ok because she's one of my all time favourites and does a lot of damage. priest gregor on the other hand,

they didn't have family hierarch ishmael on this tier list but she'd probably be in the resilient tier as well

the devyat ids are an interesting exercise in management; they're very good in short battles, but you want to be careful with them in anything too long otherwise they become a liability, die or retreat, and then you're missing a spot in your team. however if corrosion is the strat then they're probably good for that too considering the rapid decline in sanity after 30 courier trunks.

i have zero (0) don ids :( but base don is decent despite her underlevelled status and very weak skills

heathcliff LOVES dying it's his favourite activity

hong lu's delicate frame is no match for most enemies unfortunately. he's better than heathcliff though so i have to keep using him lmao

ryoshu is actually quite good for a default id; she carried me through the dongbaek battle along with outis, she's got decent damage output and skills and she's surprisingly healthy. i have a couple other ryoshus but they're both probably worse than the default one so i find myself coming back to her again and again.

[valeriefauxnom]

The Only Tierlist that Matters(tm)

'Best in Element' this, 'Best character that'...

Here's the only thing that you need to know about Dragalia and its lore: who's the best at Alberian Chess.

A fair portion of this is both evidenced and guesswork. Evidenced guesswork? I'll just walk through my analysis for anyone going ??.

In short, I think Leonidas is the best chess player shown. Leif outright states him to be a 'particularly cunning opponent' in comparison to Chelle and Phares, whom he both considers very skilled. Leonidas is the only one to have beaten Leif.

So if 1st and 2nd are locked, I'd say it's a more blurry picture between Phares and Chelle. Chelle I put lower just for the fact she explicitly finds Alberian chess a bit 'too restrictive' in rules and thus might not be quite as studious or caring of its games, and with Phares seemingly capable of getting Leonidas heated while appearing calm himself in "A Royal Tea Party", I think he might be better by at least a little bit. We know the current Chelle vs. Leif meta is a Leif win (though starting to tax/surprise him), but alas, we've no Phares-Chelle or Phares-Leif matchup to settle the big dog league for good.

A tier brings in Regina, who is only A just because I don't have any evidence to suggest how she might stack up against our formidable S-tiers. She's also native in a different variety of Alberian Chess, which further complicates how she could adapt against the southern rules most other players use here. In her own league, who knows? She could be S.

Discount Deku-looking-creature- er, Eugene, is shown to be a very skilled player, and yet his record is 0-2 vs. Leif, Leif not feeling incredibly threatened both times, and so A he goes.

Valyx here is mostly from a lack of evidence, as we never really see him play chess to my knowledge, but Leif at least will endorse him to be a skilled player. For Leif, no.2, that counts for something, and so into A he goes. We would need more sibling match-ups to see how he stacks up against his elders.

Ilia is similarly fuzzy in exact placement but we do know that Leonidas does not feel threatened by her, implying at least some tangible gulf in talent that I think bumps her down at least one tier. That being said, he also compliments her as skilled in reading his intent in chess, which, since Leo is no.1, having good reads on him is likely a very strong point to succeeding in Alberian chess. Besides, if it's 'Alberian' chess to begin with, she very well might have only recently learned the game, as Alberia as a state only started to exist 700 years after her time. That she's this good already is impressive!

Aurien provides some distinguishment between himself and Eugene by losing against him. He's still high up because Euden is very surprised he lost, and had made it in the chess tournament far. He seems to be pretty keen on the strategic understanding of the game, as well.

Falling all the way to D, we've Pinon, who understands some of the principles of strategy, etc, but still is inclined to making big mistakes for players like Regina to exploit. Even when she tries to bring back and challenge Regina with the southern rules she's learned from her travels there, Regina can still beat her comfortably.

Euden just wanted to be in 'E' tier because of his name No, it's mostly because he only just started learning at Gala Leif time in canon. And Euden... doesn't exactly seem to have a natural gift, as, per him when learning:

Or, more eloquently,

In short, he's not quite 'moving pieces at random' F tier for a complete novice, but we just have no evidence he's grown since. He's simply too busy fighting a war and having identity crises and stopping the Halidom from being blown up for the 3rd time today to have much time to practice, either. That being said, since Leif was the one to first start instructing him, he might very well have an edge when it comes to getting better over time!

[starpros-sunshine]

Eichi gives away the mask so easily because it was never meant to be an "engagement ring" like you delulu wataeis imagined it to be lmao. It was wataru saying that he will continue playing tsumugi clown role in fine and won't leave it for hokuto's mother troupe after graduation. Do you dumb fucks even read the stories? Eichi didn't even understand tf that mask meant when wataru gave it to him and wataru referenced fucking tsumugi in his "proporsal". I dunno why the f you think it's ok to lie about "! EnDiNG wItH wAtAeI EnGaGeMEnT" when the chapter it happened wasn't even close to the end of ep:link. Cope

PS: how do you live with the fact that Eichi clearly admitted to never being in love in his life and Wataru said that even though Eichi likes him, he still can easily discard him for the sake of his objectives?

I love you anon thank you for giving me a nice reason to ramble again beautiful ask 10/10 I'm sorry this is probably not how you hoped this would go but this is such a funny block of text delightful really thank you for the enrichment please marry me

But okay yes now to get down to the actual ask just to disclaim I am solely relying on translations seeing as I do not speak japanese well enough to understant the original text so if anyone has anything to add to this or to correct me on please feel free to do so.

Now to get started I'm not sure if one could say Eichi gave away the mask "So easily" seeing as he claimed that it was "a hard choice to make"? Which, as one might know, implies unease with an idea and pondering and debating and a general amount of thinking behind a decision so? I know this isn't really the main focus of this ask but I'm just a tad miffed with the semantics of it is all. And in either case giving the mask back to Wataru while expecting it back still shows a certain degree of trust in their relationship it wouldn't have been such a big deal for him (as it apparently was) if the mask didn't have a lot of sentimental value to him (the both of them really if we look at the whole exchange).

Now to the claim that the mask was "only" Watarus promise to stay with fine and "continue playing Tsumugis clown role". This is not entirely incorrect. Regarding the acting troupe and staying with fine bit at least.

I'm assuming this bit in EP:Link Deadend/7 is what you are referencing, and I see where you're coming from. But the bluebird line

from literally three dialogue lines further down, which references this line of dialogue (notorious Eichi line everyone should be familiar with)

kind of somewhat really recontextualises that? Because you see this is a reference to a fairytale about a pair of siblings and they get sent out by a nice fairy to find the bluebird of happiness for her sad daughter to make her happy again so they both go on an adventure and travel far and search and search but they can not find the bluebird of happiness and then when they return home again, disappointed because they couldn't find the blue bird, they realise only one night has actually passed and the journey was probably just a dream. But then their eyes fall upon their pet dove in it's cage which appears blue all of a sudden and so they gift it to the fairies sad daughter which becomes happy again and sets the bird free. The real bluebird of happiness is a dove. At least in the version of the story I'm familiar with but I mean everyone sees the symbolism right? It's. very hard to miss.

And then dropping this?

I'm not sure how to say this properly but in the overall context this makes it pretty clear that Tsumugi has nothing to do with this anymore this is Fully between Wataru and Eichi. And I am the last person to dismiss Tsumugis significance in the course of Wataeis relationship as characters I will be among the first to protest when someone dismisses the importance of Tsumugis and Eichis relationship in favour of some image they have of Wataei but he has nothing to do with this one.

Yes Tsumugi gets namedropped but - again - I don't really see how that would lessen the sentiment Wataru is triying to convey here? Because. Yes. Why wouldn't he mention Tsumugi?

The entire conversation pretty much boils down to "Yes I was initially only in this because I thought I could replace Tsumugis role in your life and then I wanted to leave but we have spent so much time together that I realised that that is definitely not working out because I really do love you. I love you as a teammate; I love you as a friend; I love you as a person and I am very angry at myself for not managing to get that into your head. So please allow me to stay with you for as long as you'll have me." And then also Eichi not understanding because he has the emotional self awareness of a very emotionally unaware loaf of bread and also because he hates himself that is a very big thing about his character huge part of his character arc actually that he. you know? Hates himself? And feels guitly for his actions during the war? And doesn't think he deserves love and companionship? Which is why Wataru wanting to stay with him for him and not for some twisted form of revenge is such an alien concept to him? Because he is projecting his insecurities onto Wataru? As one is wont to do when they hate themself? "EiChi Didn'T eVen UnDErStanD WhAt tf ThAT Mask MEAnt" Yeah. That's. That's the point? So he can think about it and come to that conclusion himself which works as a keymoment in his characters journey from hating life and himself to enjoying being alive and wanting to live on because of the people he's surrounded with? He literally explains why he didn't immediately understand the mask during the EP:Link Epilogue/4

And to get back to the "I dunno why the f you think it's ok to lie about "! EnDiNG wItH wAtAeI EnGaGeMEnT" about which I have two things to say:

"Lying" implies further intent and an effort. Neither of which exist in this case.

He literally went down on one knee while making a big proclamation of offering himself to Eichi with a very personal item that works as a symbol for their commitment to each other on a starlit rooftop. The comparison writes itself.

3. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joke

And then I expected there to be a proper reason given and instead you proceed to follow that up with "when the chapter it happened wasn't even close to the end of ep:link". I know the shame is on me for expecting something sensical from an ask which has been near constant in it's lack of correct statements but such is human nature I suppose. And you are not wrong. Deadend/7 isn't very close to the end of EP:Link. That is true.

But do you know what Is very close to the end of EP:Link? The Epilogue Chapters 3-5.

Do you know what the content of those chapters is? I do. Very well actually :)

(Eichi literally explains why he didn't get it)

So if this answers your "Do you dumb fucks even read the stories?" questions, Yes. And I think I'm a lot better at it than you. So I'd say I'm coping quite well over here :p

PS: Regarding your PS, I take the "I've never been in love before so I wouldn't know" comment with a lot of humour actually as an aroace person who's emotional self awareness also ends at "good" and "Not good" I think it's very funny all things considered especially because he mentioned the loving Wataru thing several times before that and I'm generally of the belief that actions speak louder than words and also am in a happy long term relationship with the concept of "Reading Subtext". So please excuse me for not breaking down in tears everytime someone reminds me of that one singuar line of text in one of my favourite all time enstars stories that came out three years ago which also brought us the single best card set in the entire game

as well as absolute banger dialogue such as

Among others <33

And there are soooooo many other examples of wataei dialogue that simply make me swoon but I have already had to take out so many of the one's I wish I could put here so this wouldn't get "Do you love the colour of the sky" long

And also, regarding your "Wataru said that even though Eichi likes him, he still can easily discard him for the sake of his objectives" I'll just say that no he absolutely could not. I mean he'd say that and if pull comes to shove and he has no other option then he might seriously consider it but may I mention that Wataru was gone for a few days at most but really not that long of a time during Sanctuary and Eichi stopped considering being a normal rational person that doesn't leave helpless 17 year olds in the midst of a construction site. Very different situation but I feel like it's worth mentioninh here. Another example is Eichis almost not being able to go through with the war because of Wataru. Wataru had to actively come and tell Eichi to go through with it. Wataru isn't the reason Eichi started the war, that is wrong, but he is the reason Eichi almost didn't finish it. and during the war era that was his Main objective. Again I'm part of the fraction "actions speak louder than words" Show don't tell and all that, but even the words are pushing it.

And that concludes my essay :)

[hana-bobo-finch]

i hardly ever mention Glad for some reason. you. you know the one. the cousin. the mouthless one. bellona’s cousin that I have probably only mentioned once but she does actually do stuff in the plot. yknow. i only have concept sketches of her but uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

[singdancegetnaked]

hey, if you follow me and are not watching From Bureaucrat to Villainess: Dad’s Been Reincarnated! then, as of episode four, this is my official recommendation that you should do so

[namira]

I have so much animosity towards whoever made 'gut health' trendy, so much you can scarcely comprehend. Like as a proud IBS warrior I am just like always going to be prone to stomach issues and thus always going to have people giving unsolicited advice about it but like literally every "gut health" tip makes it infinitely worse and when you are like 'actual medical professionals have advised me to limit my fiber intake' they will not accept it.