#because the colors in this scene? SO GOOD.

[many-but-one]

Satanic Panic, The False Memory Foundation’s Shaky Origins, and Why You Should Believe RAMCOA Survivors

(TW: mentions of RAMCOA, False Memory Foundation, child torture & death, cults, trafficking)

Pretty disappointed to see a fairly popular and well known blog on tumblr is encouraging the idea that RAMCOA doesn’t exist. Just came across this post and was pretty bummed to see the comments too.

For those that agree with them (most of my followers won’t but who knows who will stumble across this), please know that RAMCOA has been going on for much longer than the Satanic Panic. The Satanic Panic was fabricated in an effort to discredit RAMCOA survivors. It was supported by the False Memory Foundation, which was created by a man (and his wife) trying to prove his daughter’s repressed memories of trauma involving him did not really happen. [Explained further in the third article further down in this post]

For the record, false memory/planting false memories has been disproven, it’s not possible to fully plant false memories in patients. Some memories can be altered to an extent because memories can be disjointed and influence from others can cause memories to shift slightly, which is why it’s not encouraged for trauma patients to share exact detailed memories with each other. For example, if two trauma patients were abused by their father and had a similar situation happen and patient A spoke about their experience in detail, if both fathers wore glasses and patient A describes their father to have black rimmed glasses, patient B’s memory might shift to believe that their father also had black rimmed glasses, even though his glasses were gold rimmed. However, it’s not possible to fully plant memories that do not exist in a patient’s memory. The “base memory” so to speak has to be there in order for any alterations to occur, and those alterations that are possible are often rather minuscule, such as glasses or whether or not their abuser had facial hair or not, or the color of the person’s eyes. Not an entire scene of RA. [Again, explained well by the third article below.]

Repressed memory has been proven to exist. (Though it’s more accurately called dissociated memories by clinicians) It can even exist in people who have traumas that happen in adulthood. Pieces of a traumatic event may go missing in a patient’s working memory, and they may not retrieve it until they are ready to process the memory and all the emotions and information that comes with it. However, it still exists stored in the brain, just in a different area than working memory. It’s why triggers to the traumatic event (that the patient may not even realize are triggers until they occur) can cause flashbacks and memory resurfacing during said flashbacks.

Some sources explaining the False Memory Foundation and the harm they’ve caused: [a good overview of a woman who was major in the development of the idea of repressed memory being a myth, by a researcher of child psychiatry], [while this is a psychology today article, I think this explains well how misused the idea of FMS - false memory syndrome - is.] [A comprehensive article explaining the roots of the FMF and how the studies used to “prove” false memory are terrible and easily debunked, with several assertions from professionals in the field.] I want to add that while the FMF has dissolved and rightfully so, the British False Memory Society is still alive and well, as well as the Satanic Temple’s Grey Faction, and both groups still cite False Memory Syndrome as being real and claim that RAMCOA survivors have false memories of their abuse.

However, before Satanic Panic happened, people were starting to actually believe in the existence of RAMCOA and the concept of DID was brought into the mainstream. A survivor on tiktok has a very good video on this situation. And that scared people, especially the abusers themselves who didn’t want to get caught. That’s when the False Memory Foundation stepped in on the heels of Satanic Panic and literally rewrote the textbooks therapists learned from, and basically taught everyone that repressed memory doesn’t exist. Any therapists that spoke about their patients’ experiences with RAMCOA were sued. Therapists stopped wanting to treat RAMCOA patients for fear of being sued and/or losing their license or being told they planted these memories in their patients’ heads and possibly losing their licenses. It led to generations of old therapists not treating RAMCOA patients and generations of new therapists learning it doesn’t exist.

But it does exist. To outright deny that child torture cannot exist is absurd. 1-2% of reported child abuse falls under the definition of child torture. [source, TW: photos of children with serious injuries from torture included on page 7 of this document] For the record, my abuse was never and has never been reported, and most survivors—RAMCOA and non-RAMCOA, whose trauma falls under the definition of torture—never reported or plan to report.

Even if you find the mind control aspect to be far-fetched, ritual abuse most certainly does exist. I’ve seen videos on the surface web on fucking tiktok of all places of child torture and ritual abuse. Organized abuse such as sex trafficking and labor trafficking does exist. Two out of those three things in the acronym are well documented to exist. And for the record, ritual abuse and cult abuse even in adults can cause extreme mind and identity alteration, upwards to the point of nearly being mind control. Look up OSDD-2 in the DSM-V. Look up just about any cult survivors testimonies and hear how they talk about how they nearly became a different person within their cult, how the cult uses torture and mind altering drugs to get their initiates to commit terrible acts of violence to each other. Now imagine if that same stuff were happening to a child whose mind is significantly easier to mold and change. Even if the child RAMCOA survivor does not develop DID, it can cause extreme conditioned responses in which the child (or now grown adult or teen) will still do the responses even now because as a child they were threatened with torture or death if they didn’t do it.

Mind control is essentially an extreme form of conditioning, and with the plethoras of research on DID and how it functions, it’s not even a difficult concept to grasp that a cult member might learn how to split new alters in a child via torture and then manipulate those alters to do what they want individually. Anyone who knows fuck all about DID knows that alters can be triggered out via positive and negative triggers. All mind control programming is, is creating a specific trigger for a specific alter and then when that child is exposed to that trigger, that alter comes out and does the task it was taught to do—usually via torture, manipulation, and threats of harm to the child or those the child loves. It’s not a difficult concept to grasp, and with how long TBMC (torture based mind control) programmers have had to perfect their work, it’s no surprise that they’ve learned how to make alters do extremely complex tasks or hold onto specific functions, always at the ready for their specific trigger.

RAMCOA research doesn’t exist in mainstream spaces because it’s nearly impossible to be taken seriously because of people who claim it doesn’t exist when it’s not even a complex topic to understand. They just don’t want to accept that it exists. The concept is terrifying, harrowing, and at some times almost absurd—and that combination makes it easier for people to put their blinders up and decide it doesn’t exist. [Edited to add: On top of this, what little research is done on it is steeped in conspiracy theories that often have roots in antisemitism. While I’ve asserted that Miller’s deprogramming books are good reads for RAMCOA survivors, she does often sound conspiratorial, and quotes Svali, a known antisemite. While I don’t think RAMCOA is exclusively related to the Illuminati stuff she often talks about, Miller’s work cannot be completely discounted because of her beliefs of where the abuse originated. Where it originates matters much less than the fact that it happens. However, not from dark, underground, secret societies—but from normal places like churches, children’s own homes (yes, RAMCOA can be done by a single parent to a single child, it just may look different than say, a trafficking ring), trafficking rings, militaristic groups, political cults, etc. I wanted to put the above put there because I know someone is going to come at me and try to say the researchers who talk about it were conspiracy theorists. Yeah, they were. Maybe they were the only ones willing to talk openly about it because of the fact they’re conspiracy theorists? I don’t know. However, I think it should also be noted that just because the researchers sucked doesn’t mean the information taken from them isn’t useful when you weed out the conspiracy stuff. For example, a LOT of modern understanding of medicine was taken from Nazi and Japanese experiments during WWII. Arguably some of the worst doctors on earth. Do we discount everything we learned because they were horrible, evil, people? No. While those who studied RAMCOA went about it in shit ways, that doesn’t discount the information learned completely. Likewise, much of modern psych understanding came from roots that included incredibly unethical experiments that would never be allowed today. Do we throw out all of that info too? No, we don’t. I’m not saying that we shouldn’t hold these people accountable, I’m saying we cannot throw out all discussion of RAMCOA because the doctors who talked about it were shitty people.]

I wish I could decide it doesn’t exist. I have permanent scarring that proves what happened did happen. I have doctor’s visits that prove I am disabled because of the traumas I went through. I have a DID specialist who didn’t even know programming to our extent even existed before our parts started telling her what they went through and she heard it from our own mouth. She had to learn how to deprogram us on the fly because she’d never done so before. So fuck off with your “oh, RAMCOA patients only have RAMCOA because they’ve been influenced by their therapist to believe they do” bullshit.

I relive my traumas in flashbacks and nightmares daily. There have been periods in my healing process where I couldn’t leave the house without someone with me for months. I couldn’t hold a job for nearly a year. I didn’t know any of this happened to me until I was in my 20s. I thought my memory was just bad and the only parts of my childhood I remembered were little blips of good things, usually involving my parent that was not involved with the cult or memories with friends at school or when I was hanging out with my sports teammates. Living with this stuff is hell. You think I want to live with this stuff? If I could permanently erase it all from my memory forever I would. But I can’t. I don’t have that luxury.

It happened. And I’m not the only child it happened to, both in the area of my country I live in and in areas all over my country and the world. This is not an isolated phenomenon. It is more common than anyone tends to realize (though still rarer than most DID cases, thank fuck). I was lucky to survive. I survived because they wanted me to. I saw a lot of children, teens, and adults who were not as “lucky” as I was. If you won’t respect survivors and their stories, at least respect the ones who didn’t survive. They didn’t deserve their final moments to be so full of pain. All of the children in these groups deserved to be loved and cared for and treated with softness and compassion. So do adult survivors like me and many others.

If I could end on one thing, it would be to urge the doubters to have some fucking compassion and empathy for people who have been through things they cannot even begin to understand. My past feels like a nightmare I will never be able to escape. I cannot erase it. I can only try to heal from it. So heal I will do, and in the process I will continue to speak the truth of my experience as safely as I can.

You want proof it’s real? Survivors are your proof.

WE are the proof.

[Edit: changed some wording for clarification + added a section after rereading a couple hours later]

[Edit 2: I realized I said my abuse has never been reported, I meant my RAMCOA related abuse. Want to make that clear. I reported sexual abuse done by my church to CPS and nothing came of it. CPS actually wrongfully claimed that since they had no reports existing of that church harming kids they wouldn’t pursue it since it happened so long ago, when a cursory google search of said location shows they’ve been reported multiple times and all reports were dropped. Why, I’m not sure.]

[accio-victuuri]

bobo the piggy. 🐽 + cpns

i think it’s about time to make some kind of compilation about this aspect of the fandom. mainly because xz seems to be attached to it lately. this characterization of him is more of good natured teasing and endearment — nothing derogatory. i know there is a negative impression when someone is a “pig” but that’s not the case at all with yibo. it’s more of the cute side, and to represent that “soft side” of yibo when he’s not on lion or panther mode.

a huge part of this is mugui laoshi’s bobi character that everyone loves and why it’s really stuck with the fandom. who wouldn’t love that cute character? in the same way that yibo also has that cute side to him we all adore.

let me start first with yibo and his connection to the “pig” title. with him being known as the Little Golden Pig in c-ent. i’m getting this one from Baidu:

"Little Golden Pig" is a nickname for entertainment star Wang Yibo. This title comes from his extremely high popularity in the industry. With great influence, he is regarded as one of the top artists. The commercial value is so high that in the activities he participated in such as Weibo night or YH Family concert. Using his name the prices of related products will rise rapidly. Therefore, he known as the "Little Golden Pig" in recognition of his achievements in the business field.

TOTALLY AGREE. <3

other instances of this association:

• videos of him with pigs for your pleasure ( trying to be friends with one and this show actually had him rapping to this pig lol and feeding a pig at DDU )

• the miniso collab doll that is supposed to be yibo is a cute pig.

• he once wore Nike shows that’s called Pink Pig.

• the fact that we associate Pink as being his other favorite color and how he seems to associate that with romance.

• that viral pig meme that danced to Wugan 😂😂

• meme/expressions of him sometimes used by fans where he looks like a pig.

i bet there is some more, but i will stop here cause i know people ( and me personally ) want to move to the cpn side of things already! the first one will have to be PEPPA PIG. something that started within the crew and has somehow evolved into being about wangxian — and by extension — yizhan. ( some cpns here here and here )

• this video by BYS ( by your side ) of a behind the scenes clip when xz called wyb a pig. that’s it, in the video he calls his attention by shouting “pig” and then asks him to catch the sword and then they proceed to their usual banter.

• there is an lrlg rumor where xz was talking about a piggy nose. i think he really fixates on that. and the way xz says it, you can see that it’s good natured teasing. then wyb compares him to a black pig.

• his pig drawing, but it is doing a finger heart sign. a pose wyb was fond of at some point.

• the book xz was photographed with “The Maverick Pig” by Wang Xiaobo. i mean, look at the cover and the name of the author. tho we know that xz loves to read a variety of books and this one seems interesting.

and there was an lrlg rumor where it looked like wyb was reading a letter by xz to him. he started with “i give you my whole soul..” and xz cuts him off. like he is embarrassed and doesn’t want wyb to continue on. cpfs thought it’s from a poem by the same author called loving you is like loving life.

I give you my whole soul, along with its quirks, tantrums, flickers, 1800 bad habits. It's really annoying, there’s only a little good, Love you.

🫠🫠🫠🫠

• pig on his phone! 📲 i think this one is more telling and personal. you can explain it differently and say that since gg is superstitious, he believes that it’s some form of attracting prosperity. which could be true. but at the same time, wyb does the same for him. his piggy who brought him happiness and good fortune in life.

• fake rumor of them arguing as they usually do and then xz saying “the pig is angry” pertaining to wyb.

• another cute rumor:

🟢"It's cold, I'm afraid he'll freeze his head. Doesn't this look good with a hat?"

🔴"Yeah, you're pretty good at taking care of yourself."

Teacher Wang locked his phone. You're not going to reply? Hahahahaha. It's a piglet doll wearing a hat with the number "16" on it. It's pretty cute.

people are pointing at this stuffed toy as the alleged pig that yibo is taking care of. and the fact that it has 16 on it. 👀

and it’s a cow piglet!!!! 💕

just thinking about xz giving bobo a doll to take care of is making me somft!

• and another rumor 😂😂😂

XZ: There is a pig here wyb! [There is a pig sticker on the side of the makeup mirror. I don't know who put it there. ]

then xz was saying it’s cute, wyb then says “don’t say it looks like me!” to which xz replied: “I didn’t plan to say it! Why do you always think about yourself?” 🤣🤣🤣

they are so chaotic!!!!

there is something funny in all of this because with all the symbolism we have associated with them like the moon — xz chose the pig. maybe it’s because there is no room to misunderstand the meaning or association. you can explain what the moon, stars and umbrellas are for in a non-cpn way when he posts about it, but this leaves almost no room for escape. xz is really out here going on vacation and relaxed but leaving us stressed out with the candies he drops!

source.

[chewnotchoke]

don't ask me where i've been - l.riwoo

note: before anything else, this all started bcs of this tiktok and i thought 'wow he's so fucking sexy i should make a cocky riwoo fic' and boom :) ,,, he's not super cocky here but yk his confidence is on another level

vibes are kinda based from friends by chase atlantic so go take a listen :)

warnings: drinking, partying, making out, no smut, riwoo is a chase atlantic song personified (he's just so hot), and just riwoo being the cool guy he is

word count: 1.6k

more under the cut!

to find freedom after a relentless week of exams is what you always seek, and the place to go to is the club. with the beats pulsing through the air, the swirling lights and LEDs wrapping around you melted the exhaustion and sleepless night you had for a week. a table was reserved for you and your friends coming tonight. some of them welcomed you while others still hadn’t arrived. the laughter and greetings were barely audible from the sound booming across the place.

“what’s up, y/n! how was finals week? haven’t seen you around lately…” leehan offers you a shot of tequila which you politely decline. “barely survived, but i’m glad to be here!” you weren’t planning on drinking a lot tonight, but there sure are a lot of influences around you. a few drinks wouldn’t kill you anyway.

the bitter taste of tequila spread around your mouth, fiery and intense. your face contorted with a grimace as the liquid went down, biting onto the lime barely after a second. leehan smiles in satisfaction and you can only roll your eyes.

the strobe of lights slices through the darkness, casting fleeting glimpses of pleasure on faces flushed with ecstasy while the music fills every corner of the room. “are we not going to dance yet?” you ask him. “let’s wait for everyone else.”

“like who?”

“riwoo, and sungho.”

you couldn’t even care less about the latter, but the mention of riwoo’s name sent a shiver of excitement and nervous energy cascading through your veins. the room seemed to shift, the lights becoming more vibrant, and the sounds more distinct, all because he was coming.

oh, riwoo. you had few interactions with him but there’s just something so captivating in him that draws you closer. the anticipation was thrilling and the mere thought of seeing him made your palms sweat. you lost track of the time that you didn’t notice he had just arrived.

he was wearing a white undershirt, a black zip jacket with collar, a dirty wash color of denim jeans, a wristwatch on his left wrist, and a sunglass that sat above his head, pushing his hair back. the sight of him caught your heart in a delightful turmoil.

‘he looks so fucking good.’ a warm blush crept up your cheeks, and you quickly lowered your gaze, afraid that your eyes would betray the whirlwind of emotions stirring within you.

he flashed his eyebrows as he greeted you with a smile, mischievous and warm. you watch him gulp down the same drink leehan offered earlier. this scene wasn’t new to you, but being around these people is. you were only close with leehan, jaehyun who came with you earlier.

but that’s what friday is for, right? having fun. and you bet it’s gonna be more fun with riwoo and his other friends around.

“what do you think about going wild before going to the dance floor, riwoo?” sungho arches his eyebrows, smirking. “wild? what do you mean?” riwoo asks, looking around, as if he doesn’t know what his friend’s intention was. without giving him a proper answer, sungho pours a drink for riwoo and hands him the saucer of lime and salt.

you're perched on a stool, watching attentively then riwoo walks closer to you.

“do you want to do a body shot?”

the bar's dimly lit pulsing lights created a dazzling array of hues across the floor, reflecting off the mirrored walls and blending with the electric hum of dialogues and music. you can’t help but laugh nervously. did i just get chosen by riwoo? to do a body shot?

“me?” the thought of it seems so wild, so out of the ordinary for a friday night. but the atmosphere is infectious, and the rhythm of the night seems to nudge you towards a yes. cheers and laughter echo around you, creating a clamor of excitement. you see riwoo’s face dominating above, eyes sparkling with playful determination.

“sure, why not?”

with a confident grin, riwoo leaned forward, the warmth of his breath mingling with the faint scent of tequila he drank earlier. he gently sprinkled salt along the curve of your neck.

the room seemed to hold its breath as riwoo licked the salt from your neck, his tongue leaving a trail of tingling sensation that made your knees weak. his lips lingered for a moment longer than necessary, a tempting tease that sent trembles down your spine. riwoo picked up the lime wedge, his fingers brushing against your skin as he held it ready. then, with experienced ease, riwoo threw back the shot. the lime followed, his teeth scraping your fingertips as he sucked the tangy juice, your heart racing at the sheer intimacy of the moment.

the crowd erupts in applause and yells, the noise almost deafening but thrilling all the same. it’s reckless and a bit silly, but in the contagious energy of the night, it feels just right. you didn’t notice how long you’ve been looking at riwoo that he had to snap at you to get your attention.

“what are you looking at? just tell me if you wanna kiss me i’d let you do it.”

he smirks, turning around as he goes back to his friends circling the table with rims of shot glasses lined up. leehan came and wooed, nudging your shoulder with his as he brought another glass of drink.

“i might die before i even get drunk.” you gulped the alcohol in one shot, your cheeks heating up as you barely tried to catch up with everything that was happening around you.

the night deepens and the air becomes thicker with the scent of perfume and sweat. your head starts feeling a little heavy, and your surroundings get a little hazy as the neon lights cast over your face and all around the area. after a few dances, you have been sitting beside your friends for almost an hour as you try to catch up with them, and riwoo is there too.

you were too busy chatting with drunk jaehyun to notice, but riwoo had been stealing you a few glances. a few interactions happened earlier again like him passing the glass to you, or eyes meeting as you laugh together over the story taesan was telling earlier. (like this)

then, the music shifted to a familiar song. without a word, everyone moved to the dance floor. riwoo suddenly grabs your wrist and navigates you through the crowd, following everyone else to the platform. the floor vibrated beneath your feet, and you felt a rush of exhilaration as you danced with wild abandon, your body moving in time with the beat, and mind blissfully blank.

slightly intoxicated, he sways behind you with his grip on your waist, warm and reassuring. the rhythm of the music thrummed through your veins, and suddenly, all the awkwardness and self-consciousness melted away. you moved together, your bodies finding a sync that felt as natural as breathing.

riwoo starts telling something inaudible because of the blasting music.

“what?”

“i said you smell good!” his voice a little louder. you turn around to take a good look at him but his eyes are wandering around. not long after, you caught his attention when you asked him, “really?” and he leaned forward closer to your neck, his warm breath wrapping over your skin as his nose caught the scent of your perfume.

“you do,” he says. “sorry, i’m kinda drunk.” his hand palms over his face, trying to keep himself sober but we all know he’s not.

under the dark lights and swirling haze of the the bar, the unsaid tension burst into something palpable and undeniable. his eyes are deep pools of enigmatic charm. they're the kind of eyes that see through the ordinary, making you feel like you're the most captivating person in the world when his gaze locks with yours. there’s a depth there, a magnetic pull that makes looking away seem impossible.

at that moment, the world seemed to narrow down to just you and riwoo, as if the music and the crowd had faded into the background.

“wanna do it? let's go outside.”

riwoo drags you out of the place as he brings you to the parking lot lit only by the distant, flickering streetlights. you leaned your body against the door of the car’s trunk. not a single figure was seen and riwoo slowly slanted in, narrowing the gap between your lips and faces. the taste of whiskey and something sweet—sunkist, maybe—mingled in the kiss, intoxicating in its own right.

riwoo’s body presses against yours while your fingers trace the back of his neck. it was clumsy and urgent, the kind of kiss that only comes from a place of uninhibited desire, fueled by the haze of alcohol.

you were fazed by how riwoo was enthusiastic with the way his hand was roaming behind your small back, and the other tangling in your hair. his lips moved in sync with yours. he regained his composure and reminded himself of what was happening; he was really kissing you, you were really kissing him, and suddenly the world around the two of you became meaningless.

it was messy and imperfect, yet somehow perfect in its raw intensity. something about the taste of riwoo’s lips was intoxicating, making you need more—need everything. the night was alive with your shared breath, the feverish heat of your kiss cutting through the cool night air. his hands went from the side of your head, down to the back of your neck.

“should they know about this?” you backed away, almost sober.

“why not? shouldn't they know that we just had a hot make out session, and i'm a good kisser?” he sneaks in an arrogant smile, “let's go back.”

as you went back to the pub, riwoo remained on the dance floor to have fun with the guys while you head over to the shared table, finding leehan alone, drunk as you guessed.

“weren't you dancing earlier? taesan and i couldn't find you.”

“don't ask me where i've been. i just made out with riwoo.”

and if there's one thing you've learned that night, riwoo was a crazy bottom-lip kisser :)

i'm going crazy over riwoo and it's not even healthy anymore,, i'm going insane writing nor reading a fic is not enough!! i just need him right Now!!

he's so chase atlantic code here wtf i had to listen to a whole ca playlist while writing this and it fits him so bad!

anyway,,tell me how this went through the comments, reblogs, or wherever!!! i love feedbacks plsplspls

[figofswords]

thoughts/braindump about the new zelda game:

-PLAYABLE ZELDA!!!!!!

-fairy design VERY good. what a funky little creature. also i can't believe zelda is hyrule's first poketrainer

-god i almost feel like this would work really well if it was closer to like the tunic style? tunic isn't nintendo but it's very much a love letter to games like alttp and i think it really does a good job mixing the cute/charming with the sinister/mysterious in a way that would REALLY make those portals hit harder visually.

-i don't have a problem with the cutesy-ness of it - wind waker + the other toon games are some of my favorite zelda games visually and they go for a cuter style, but they work really well because they're a) a really nice stylized mix of 2d/3d and b) the character models are all very very emotive, exceptionally so for zelda games especially. by contrast, the link's awakening remake style they're bringing back for this game is very. plastic looking. instead of inviting you into this colorful world, it pushes you a step back emotionally, because you're playing with plastic dolls, and even worse they're plastic dolls that barely emote. cartooning relies on exaggeration - exaggerated emotion, movements, character design, etc. plastic looking 3d chibis running around a plastic chibi world are stiff, their movements are limited, their expressions feel fake.

-re playable zelda: yay!!!!! re the visual style they're going with: vaguely disappointed, but unsurprised. totk came out last year, and reusing this style means they're probably recycling assets from link's awakening (models/rigs/animations, environment models, probably all of the coding for the mechanics/enemy behaviors) which means it can come out faster and cost less money.

-i'm kinda assuming this is them testing the waters with playable zelda, and maybe if this game is successful they'll decide it's worth spending money/time/resources on a more serious game featuring player zelda.

-might do some fanart of the new zelda in the toon/windwaker style and maybe play around with scenes from the trailer to put it in the tunic style? we'll see

-where in the timeline is this Eiji Aonuma??pink crystal zelda is from oot. dont tell me this is a FOURTH timeline Eiji Aonuma i'll lose it. you still haven't explained what the hell is going on with totk. sir. mr zelda man. please

[p1nkprincess444]

⋆⭒ ♪˚｡♫ ᴄʜᴇᴀᴛᴇʀ - ᴇᴜʀᴏɴʏᴍᴏᴜs {ʟᴏʀᴅs ᴏғ ᴄʜᴀᴏs} ♫｡˚♪ ⭒⋆

cheating female!reader x euronymous

word count: 1,652

contents: 18+, cheating

You had been dating Varg for some time now, but your relationship was anything but healthy. Unbeknownst to you, Varg had been cheating on you for months. None of his friends even bothered to tell you, or even warned you when you had come over to see him and he had a girl in his bed.

You had a bright smile plastered across your face as you knocked on the door to the house where all of the bandmates resided. You were met with an exhausted looking Euronymous as he opened the door. He flashed a soft smile at you in return before moving aside allowing you in. 

“ Is Varg upstairs, ” I tried to keep my voice softer and quiet as I could tell him and probably the rest of the house was hung over.

“ Yeah- I think he came home. ”

You nodded in response as you made your way up the staircase. You crept quietly down the hall not wanting to wake anyone. Your hand grasped the cold metal of the knob as you twisted it before slowly pushing open the door. Once you caught a glimpse of the scene in front of you your heart dropped to your stomach. Him and another girl were in bed together. His hand was clasped over her mouth as he fucked her roughly from behind. He failed to notice you until he heard the thud of your bag dropping to the floor. His thrusts never slowed and his gaze never left yours. Tears were clouding your vision as you quickly snatched up your bag before you descended down the hall and then the stairs. Euronymous watched as you rushed out of the house before he could even ask what your problem was. His questions were soon answered a few minutes later when Varg and a random groupie came stumbling down the stairs. Euronymous always knew Varg was an asshole but he couldn’t believe he would cheat on a girl who was devoted to him completely. 

You didn’t answer Varg’s calls because you knew they were just weak attempts to “win you back”. You groaned softly when there was a knock on your apartment door. You crawled off your couch as you opened the door ready to tell Varg off but instead you were greeted by Euronymous.

“ What are you doing here? ”

“ I’m not really good at these things, but uhm- I just wanted to check on you, ” his eyes glanced over your disheveled hair and puffy lips and eyes. “ I know Varg’s been calling but you shouldn’t answer. ”

I smiled softly as I looked up into his shiny blue eyes, “ Do- Do you want to come in? ”

He answered your question with a quick nod as he stepped inside your apartment. His eyes wandered around the colorful apartment as he joined you on the couch. He knew you didn’t quite fit the metalhead aesthetic, but he found your apartment sort of sweet. 

“ You deserve better than Varg, you know, ” his voice was almost gentle as he looked into your eyes.

“ You think so? ”

He nodded in response before pressing a deep kiss to your lips, “ Let me show you what you deserve. ”

You didn’t push him off as his lips connected with yours once more. He moved his lips down your neck as he laid you down on the couch. His hands reached for the hem of your top before pulling it over your head. He followed this by pushing down your pajama shorts, his eyes traveled over your body before his hands move to firmly grip your hips. 

“ How could that fucking idiot cheat on you, ” he murmured this more to himself than to you as his hands moved to unbuckle his before he tossed it to the floor.

He pushed down his jeans and boxers just enough so his cock could slide out. His hand wrapped around the shaft of his cock as he rubbed the head against your panties. A soft groan left his lips as he felt your wetness soaking through your panties.

“ You want me to fuck you baby, ” his voice was teasing as he slowly hooked your panties with his fingers before yanking them down your legs. He pushed the head of his cock inside of you eliciting a soft moan from your lips. He fucked you with only the tip until he had you begging for more of him. “ You want more of my cock baby? ”

“ Please- just fuck me, ” my voice was full of need as I rolled my hips forward desperate to have more of him inside of me.

A smirk graced his lips as he saw your desperation. His hips slammed forward into yours earning a loud moan from you. His pace was slow yet deep causing small noises to slip past his lips. “ You feel so good baby- you’re so fucking tight- ” 

He moved one of your legs up onto his shoulders before his hips snapped forward. Loud groans were tumbling past his lips as his cock slammed against your cervix. He leaned down smashing his lips against yours before wrapping his hand around your neck. 

“ Does Varg fuck you like this- He know how to make you scream? ” His words were practically taunting you as he sped up his thrusts. “ Fucking- answer me, ” his grip tightened on your throat before you responded by shaking your head. A grin plastered across his face as his hips rutted into yours. 

You were starting to see stars as he continued his abuse on your cunt. You swore if he came inside of you none of it would spill from you. You couldn’t even understand what he was saying as he thrusted deeper into you. 

“ Wh- what, ” my voice was shaky as Euronymous’ thrusted up hitting my g-spot effortlessly.

He couldn’t help but smile as he watched you fall apart with each movement of his hips. He mumbled something in Norwegian that you couldn’t quite make out before he pressed a deep kiss to your lips. A groan slipped past his lips as he felt your cunt squeezing him impossibly tight signaling your impending release. He gave one more deep thrust before you came around his cock. 

“ Fucking cumming already? He really must not know how to fuck you, ” he laughed before flipping you over onto your stomach, he followed this movement by pulling your hips up to meet his cock. 

His thrusts were brutal from behind as he mumbled praises in Norwegian. His hand left your hip before he landed a sharp smack against your ass eliciting a soft cry to fall past your lips. His thrusts never slowed even when he could see you becoming overstimulated. Your tears and drool were collecting and soaking into the soft fabric of your couch as you babbled incoherently.

“ You gonna cum again already princess, ” his tone was playful as he slammed into you harder, sending you further into the cushions. Euronymous’ abuse on your dripping cunt was unrelenting as he neared his release. “ Come on baby, you can give me one more. ”

Pathetic mewls were the only thing passing your lips as he pounded into you. Not a second later you felt his cum shoot deep inside your cunt before you came again. Drool slid past your lips as Euronymous placed small kisses to your shoulder before laying you down on the couch. He cleaned himself up before pulling his boxers and jeans back up. He rolled you onto your back once more as a grin adorned his face when he saw your disheveled state. He picked up a tissue using it to wipe away your tears and drool.

“ You look so perfect, ” he pressed a kiss to your lips before pushing your legs apart again.

“ No- no I- can’t-  ”

He pushed his fingers into you slowly fucking both of your cum back into your cunt, “ just one more baby.. Last one I promise. ”

You hesitantly nodded as he slowly pushed his fingers into you. Your head fell back against the arm of the couch as he used his thumb to roll circles into your clit. He watched you falling apart while his fingers curled inside of you. He watched for every small reaction and expression that crossed your face. He moved down between your legs before he withdrew his fingers. He smiled as a small whine fell from your lips once he stopped. He watched as you lifted your head to see what he was doing.

“ Don’t worry I’m not done, ” his words were paired with a grin before he buried his head between your thighs. 

Your head fell back into the arm of the couch once more as he used his tongue to fuck you. It was the first anyone had ever done this for you and every flick of his tongue and circle his thumb made on your clit made you feel like you were on cloud nine. Varg was selfish when it came to most things so it was no surprise that he only cared about himself during sex. Your brain was completely fogged as Euronymous’ assault on your soaked cunt was building to another release. You let out a loud cry as you squirted onto his face. You were at a loss for words as your head spun before Euronymous pulled away. He had a sly grin plastered on his face as he sat up licking his lips. He wiped his face clean before cleaning you off as you watched him through half-lidded eyes. 

“ He ever do that for you? ” 

I shook my head as I looked up at him, “ never. ”

He pressed  a kiss to your lips before standing up and tossing a blanket over you, “ leave him. ”

“ What? ”

“ You can do better than some asshole who can’t make you finish. We’re gonna do this again sometime. ”

You responded with a nod before you watched him leave your apartment.

[shaylogic]

DRESSING THE PART We have a fantastic costume designer, Kelli Dunsmore. I always say that she literally wove the story into the fabric of the clothes, because there are things that she foreshadowed in the clothing that happened episodes later. Or, if characters start to get in some sort of relationship with each other, that will be reflected in the clothes that they wear or the colors that they have. Or, if they’re feeling any type of emotion, the same way we dress differently, the characters are dressed differently, which I thought was really cool. Crystal wears these massive platform boots that must be about four or five inches. They’re huge, very heavy, but it’s funny because they change the way that you walk. So, I felt like Crystal had a walk that was very different to me, out of necessity to walk in these boots. But it’s effective in feeling like a different person, or having a more of a felt sense for Crystal because it’s quite weighted. She’s not very light, which makes sense with the things that she’s going through and the experiences that she’s having. Practically, it helped, because Jayden and George are like six-foot-something. So, if I film a scene and I’m at the bottom of the lens and they’re up there, that helped. I’ve got a good couple inches on my feet.

~Kassius Nelson answering about Crystal Palace

[chevvy-yates]

[NC_RES]_00002731 mercs_Steyr_Scharfenberg_008_JI.file ///core:_stuck_on_u.file\\\

—

⚠️ READ: Please do not repost/reupload any of my art here or to any other platform, or I will be forced to do anything to get it annihilated.

lovely Summer props by @breezypunk. 🏝️

—

First:

Brudi, I built a whole jungle beach and you almost see nothing of it when I took the pics lol. Anyhow I have my own private big jungle beach now bc I managed after a few fails to save it as a preset! Idk if I can edit it afterwards but I'll find out. It's funny bc while creating/building it didn't seem so big/huge/wide but when taking photos it's like the water is 150m away from their place they had set up the chairs lol. I just pretend it was falling tide, alright.

Here's a behind the scenes of it:

somehow I imagine V to do this all day in his net world. Like he has a program similar like Minecraft but more realistic where he constantly builds stuff like that but with a vaporwave-y touch ofc.

Now back to the pics: Yes, even my boys are sometimes just boys!

Also still. Yes! Ryder goes out into the sun. Yes, he's got more of a tan than Vijay and yes, Ryder likes this colorful pride floatie. And yes, Ryder has a good time. This is me trying to show more that Ry is not always the angry cool raver dude™ in all black. I still think he's interpreted a bit wrongly by most, like I know everyone sees a different Ryder than I do. With the right people aka closest friends around he is having a good time as he trained to ignore Beast away and as long as the mood is good, Ry feels good (ofc he keeps also playing fine a lot).

Also Vijay on the orca floatie is GOALS, okay!

PS.: It was not V who built that perfect sand castle — it was Ryder who refined it bc V's base was more like some piles of sand (he's more keen to built stuff like that in the net rather than in real life).

And the water is not blue because well … Night City is a fucking hell of a polluted city …

[flareprince]

“It’s the things we love the most, that destroy us”

[canisalbus]

hello! i've written a short little machete fic, and i wanted to share it with you as thanks for all the incredible art and generous question-answering you've been doing these last few months. i hope that if you give it a look, you enjoy it. <3 keep up all your amazing work! archiveofourown [.] org / works / 50945128

✦ A Voi ✦

[astrhae]

...maybe it's all part of a great big ineffable plan

[hakusins]

cw // cursing

whitney comfort event because im having feelings

[henreyettah]

Foxhole 🦊🦊 🦊 🦊🦊 🦊🦊 🦊 🦊

[gingerteaonthetardis]

The X-Files Season 1 + close talking

[minkschasijasi]

Yays, i’ve done it ! I’ve completed the fanart!! I love this scene so much idrk why I do, but when i read it i got instant motivation to make this >:)

(The scene is in one of the first 3-5 chapts i believe ,, micheal revisiting some old graffiti tags him and his brothers made , leo joining him.)

Ughggh these two are my life— all of the boys are aaeussnssfsfsf. At that point i was desperate for leo cause they all were seriously down in the dumps.

Also, i know the fic stated/implied that he was not at all transparent to both mikey and himself, but i didn’t know how to convey the fact he’s just kinda a spirit rn. So he’a just a taaaad bit transparent.

Also, theres paint splatter on the floor of when leon made a mess back when, everyone’s colors are there,, you might have to look hard to find it tho :p

~~

@dandylovesturtles <- Ao3 author’s tumblr! Go check them out :d

I May Be Invisible, But I Still Look Good <- Fic name!! It’s on Ao3, I recommend this fic it’s just so good !!

[lordartsy]

2/10 - Naga's birthday coincides with me watching the finale of this show. I miss him already 🐍

[disdaidal]

Well, I tried at least.