#been inactive due to my schedule

[4natri]

Prettiest machine ever

[savingsallow]

— some headshots of val cuz why not✨

[melancholyhigh]

ALL MINE.

ft. leon x f!reader

synopsis. you realize you're in love with your roommate. it sucks that he's ignoring you all of a sudden.

content. 4.7k words. smut. slight jealousy/possessiveness, subby leon, dry humping, handjob, finger sucking, praise & degradation kink, unprotected p in v (riding), overstimulation, creampie, slight subspace.

note. i had mental anguish while writing this so i apologize if it's not my best. i'm also sorry for being so inactive :((

masterlist. i love feedback & reblogs <3

Leon S. Kennedy was probably the best roommate you could’ve asked for.

He had fit the criteria you hand conjured for the perfect housemate the first time you met. Leon was calm, and the apartment was pretty clean. From what you can tell, he cared enough about himself and his surroundings. 

Hell, the place looked almost uninhabited save for some trinkets and a few bits of his personality sprinkled about.

Only if you had known what you were getting yourself into when you had agreed to become his roommate.

–-

The first month of residing with Leon was great. You rarely crossed paths and never really communicated with each other due to how stressful looking for a new job was, and then proceeding to attend said job was tiring enough for you to make little social interactions.

He was relatively closed off as well. Not talking to you unless necessary or common courtesy such as a simple ‘Good morning.’

After you settled in, you noticed how much of a strange man Leon was. For one, when he did go to work, he left for weeks at a time, and in his return, he was even more closed off somehow. Leon doesn’t spare you a glance or a greeting, only grunting if you ask if he is alright.

He’s also covered in bruises and bandages, leaving you more concerned.

It made you question who really was your roommate.

In the first meeting you and Leon had, you inquired about his job, mostly to try and figure out how your schedule would work, but also with genuine interest. At the time, he merely shrugged, not answering your question point blank, telling you not to worry about it. 

He mentioned his past job as a police officer. You’d dare to ask him more about it, but you didn’t want to pry, leaving the questions for another day.

Lately, you’ve been wishing more than ever that he had answered the question instead of dodging it. In rare moments that you focus on anything else but your job, it often leads you to think about Leon and what he does while he’s away.

It annoys you too that he doesn’t tell you when he’s leaving. He doesn’t owe it to you, but some nights you think he’s getting a drink, only to return a few days later bloodied and bruised.

One night, your overthinking got the worst of you after Leon returned to your apartment in the worst condition you’ve seen in the past few months you’ve been living with him.

Up late, you were in the shared living room, wondering when he’d get home. It had been two weeks since you had last seen Leon. It was way longer than his usual business days. You had been worrying nonstop, not getting a wink of sleep. Was he dead? You’d be the first suspect on the list.

You had called him multiple times, all going to voicemail. That is until you heard the faint creaking of the front door. There he walked in, faced all fucked up. His lip busted, sporting ugly yellow and purple bruises all over the exposed flesh of his body, and a bandage wrapped around his left hand blotted with dry blood.

He was awkwardly shuffling into the room, trying not to wake, you presume. A bit late for that. 

“Where the hell were you, Leon?” your voice breaks the early morning silence. 

You see him jump slightly in surprise, almost dropping his bag. A different emotion washes through him. A mix of fright and guilt, it’s different from what you’re used to seeing him with.

Leon quickly composes himself, going back to his stoic expression. Taking his shoes caked in mud off at the front door, resting his bag down, he walks over to the kitchen opening the fridge. The light streams out, illuminating the kitchen as you follow him, awaiting an answer.

“Didn’t I tell you not to worry about it?” His back is turned to you, rummaging through the contents of the fridge.

“You’ve been gone for two weeks,” you stress with exhaustion, eyeing his injuries. “What the fuck happened to you.”

He flexes his broad shoulder before turning around to face you. His gaze pins you down before he’s back to ignoring you as he chugs the cold bottled water in his grasp. The fridge is still open, and it adds more nuisance within you.

“It’s not that bad,” he shrugs. He finally shuts the fridge close, only the moon’s light filtering into the room. “Why do you care, anyways?”

“‘Cause when you go missing, I’ll be the one locked up, Leon,” you say. He’s staring at you, trying to suppress a smirk. 

“You sure it’s not ‘cause you like me? I’m here to stay.” Is this fucker teasing you? He’s nothing like you first met him. Maybe it’s the blood loss. But to be fair, this is the first proper conversation you’ve had with him in months — you didn’t know how he actually was. 

Rolling your eyes, you ignore him, shifting your focus to his bandaged hand, blood seeping through the fabric. 

“Let me take a look at that, please,” you urge, taking his hand into yours. You overlook the questions blooming in your mind to tend to his injury.

“Okay.”

You turn the lights on, searching for a first aid kit. Once you retrieve it, you’re back in front of Leon, who’s sat patiently at the dining table. 

You roll the sleeves of your sweatshirt up before carefully peeling the fabric sticking to his bloody skin. The large gash on the back of his hand makes you uneasy. It’s deep, almost to the bone, and blood spills onto his pale skin.

“Your stitches reopened,” you tell him, cleaning the wound with a damp cloth. What did he do to warrant such an injury? “If it worsens, you need to go to the hospital.” 

“Mhm, you work with patients?” You shake your head, wrapping the wound with fresh gauze. 

“What’s your job, then?”

You scoffed, “Some office job. What’s got you busy, huh?”

“Some government bullshit.”

–-

That night the relationship you had with your roommate shifted. For the better, you supposed. 

You also bonded better with him the following morning while driving him to the hospital. He was so dramatic, yet he continued to undermine his clearly serious injury, refusing to go. The bleeding had not stopped, and you were worried it could get infected.

He was such a baby. You had bargained with him for his own health, promising to do his chores for a whole month so his hand doesn’t get amputated. 

You never really did figure out what his job was, but you guessed it was most likely confidential. It was a vague answer to your question. He could be lying, but once you’re not behind bars, you can’t complain.

You and Leon spent more time with each other.

Even though you had no idea what his job was, he did tell you why he couldn’t disclose such information, something along the lines of putting your safety in jeopardy. Wasn’t him as your roommate just as dangerous? But you didn’t bother. He had his reasons.

Leon, on the other hand, probably learned too much about you and your job. 

You weren’t familiar with the city or the people, so it was nice to talk to someone, and you may have gone overboard. You were here for a better quality of life, and it was significantly better than where you previously lived. 

You loathed your job. Your co-workers were so condescending and passive-aggressive. Not to mention, you couldn’t quit. It paid enough for you to shut your mouth. Well, not to Leon.

You’re sure he’s sick of you talking and complaining. And when you’re not complaining, you both still get along about other stuff. You mostly banter, though, because Leon is such a child.

The guy can barely care for himself, contradicting what you initially thought about him. You care for him most nights after his so-called ‘missions.’ You rebandage his wounds, scolding him for not caring about himself while he’s looped up on pain meds.

Any other night — when he’s actively not trying to get killed, and you’re not incredibly busy — you both get drunk to attempt to forget about responsibilities. Often you were spouting drunken, nonsensical rambles as Leon somehow listened to.

Ironically enough, Leon cared about your well-being more than you do. Maybe you’re delusional, but you swear he does more than a normal roommate should. It’s because you’re constantly checking up on him, you reasoned. He’s just a respectable person.

But what kind of roommate consistently asks about how you’re going? What roommate get you your favourite takeout when you’re not feeling your best? What roommate threatens to beat the shit out of your annoying co-workers?

But you’ve acknowledged that Leon wasn’t your average housemate. Not just his job, but who the fuck looks that good when they’re bleeding out?

–-

Your job has a celebration upcoming, the company’s 50th anniversary. You barely made it a year working for the place, but you want to make a good impression. You also don’t want to bore yourself to death, so why not coerce your lovely roommate to join you as your plus one?

“I’m not gonna go. Don’t you hate that place?” You stare up at him, sulking. 

“Good impressions,” you say before pleading, “C’mon, Leon, please. We can go to the bar after.”

He gives you an unimpressed look before turning away from you.

“I’ll pay for you.” You’re going to go broke because of this man. It catches his attention. 

“So desperate,” he chuckles.

“You’re going?”

“I’m gonna run you dry.”

–-

You definitely weren’t prepared to see Leon in a suit when you exited your room. He’s sat on the couch, his hand nervously running through his hair — notably slicked down with gel. 

“You that serious about making me go bankrupt?” You voice jokingly, breaking Leon out of his thoughts.

His eyes trail along your body, admiring the dress you wore — how it hugs the curves of your body — noticeably gulping as he stands up. The black suit fits his body, accentuating his broad physique and nice ass.

“I keep my promises. I hope you do too.” He says, before mumbling, “You look nice as well.”

You smile at him, ignoring the unusual feeling blooming in your stomach.

The event was indeed incredibly bland. You’re glad you bribed Leon into joining you. He’s been your saving grace. His sly quips and awful jokes have made the experience increasingly more bearable.

Your enjoyment seemed to fizzle when your co-workers wanted to converse with you. They never did before. Why would they now?

Then you realize too late that they’re not here for you. They’re there for the attractive male next to you. You watch in amusement as the girl blatantly ignores you in favour of Leon.

She’s sweet, you’d imagine, but Leon looks awkward, and there’s an uneasy feeling bubbling in your gut as she squeezes his arm in a flirting manner. The feeling is unlike what you’ve felt earlier.

You could go for a drink right now. 

The poor girl’s attempt at seducing Leon goes on longer than you’d like. He’s uncomfortable, and you admire her persistence, but it’s getting on your nerves.

Didn’t she get the memo? He’s your plus one.

You decide to interrupt their conversation, you’re not particularly proud of it, but you want to get drunk. Maybe you’re doing Leon a favour as well.

You pull him away, not offering an explanation, just the promise of getting wasted. 

When you’re at the bar, you both get settled, conversing and taking shots, all on you, of course.

Leon mentions that he understands why you hate your job and colleagues, and you laugh lightly at his claims. While you two talk, a few guys approach you, trying to get your number or asking to buy you a drink, ignoring Leon.

It wasn’t a usual occurrence, but it happened more often than not. And even though you find it flattering, it did begin to irritate you.

You politely declined their requests with an uncomfortable smile on your lips. It felt wrong to indulge in their proposals in front of Leon.

Leon’s eyes gleam with an unknown emotion as another guy approaches you. His grasp on the glass tightens, and it looks like it's about to shatter.

You once again deny the request. As you get more tipsy, your filter worsens as you half-heartedly refuse the poor guy. He walks away, visibly irritated. 

“That’s the fifth guy to ask for your number,” Leon states, taking a swig of his whiskey. His grip on the glass loosens, but his shoulders are still tense. 

You roll your eyes at his over-exaggeration. His suit’s jacket is off, revealing the white button-up shirt underneath. 

“I wasn’t interested. A few girls asked you out, too,” you declared bitterly. You’re not drunk per se, just very tipsy. 

“They’re not my type.”

“What’s your type?” Taking a sip from your drink, you observe Leon shake his head before downing his glass.

“Having fun?” you inquire, and Leon’s grateful you changed the topic.

“Liquor’s better when it’s free.”

–-

It’s the next day, and you haven’t seen Leon since. 

When you woke up, you had a pounding headache. You walked into the kitchen expecting to be greeted by an equally shit-faced Leon, but he was nowhere to be found. It was unlike him.

Usually, he’s already making fun of you for being a lightweight, and you attempt to make breakfast together. He’s probably still in bed. He did drink more than expected. It was a miracle you both got home in one piece.

You took some painkillers before heading back to bed. If you’re up to it, maybe you’ll make breakfast later. 

A few hours have passed, and still no sign of Leon. You wonder if he went to work, but that didn’t make sense. Why would he go to work with a hangover? Leon was a bit careless, though.

He was most likely ignoring you. That would be the last thing you wanted. He was the only person you cared to talk as pathetic as it sounds. Did you say something last night that upset him? He was his usual self, but you probably were too drunk to notice something off.  

He probably has work-related things to worry about. Not everything was about you. Though, you were still concerned.

You had camped in the kitchen for a while, waiting for Leon so you could confront him. You wanted to make sure he was alright.

When he did enter the kitchen, you tried to start a conversation, only for him to dismiss you entirely. He refused to respond to your troubles, getting what he needed and returning to his room. 

You thought it was a one-off thing, but sadly it wasn’t. Leon ignored you the following days, leaving you perplexed. You wished Leon would talk to you about what’s going on. Isn’t that what friends do? Communicate? Every attempt you tried to make was fruitless.

All he’s been doing was ignoring you, and it broke your heart.

His sudden indifference reminded you of when you first moved in. This abrupt disinterest in you left you staring at the ceiling in your bedroom, reflecting on your relationship with Leon. 

You despise how he’s been acting lately. 

You despise his reckless behaviour. You despise his hair that falls so perfectly. You despise how considerate he is. You despise how sweet he is to you. You despise how attractive he looks when he walks about the place shirtless, in short shorts that barely contain the flesh of his thighs and lay low on his hips when he’s sweaty after working out.

You despised how other girls looked at Leon. You despised how other guys looked at you, wishing it were him.

But you don’t hate him, far from it.

You loved his company. From the first night to the night at the bar. You wouldn’t want him to share that with anyone else. He was familiar, so it hurts that he’s been ignoring you. 

He’s treating the moments you’ve had with him seemingly worthless, the time you’ve shared — the late nights when you cared for him. The insecurities you have confided with him. Did it mean anything to him?

He most likely wouldn’t reciprocate your feelings, and you doubt he could. His job explains itself, but you’re still worried as a friend — as his roommate.

Your overthinking has got the best of you, and fuck it. You’re going to confront Leon, whether he likes it or not.

–-

You’ve been building the courage to knock on his door for 20 minutes, pacing back and forth in front of his room door. You didn’t want to make him hate you more, but his bitchy attitude made you wonder why you even liked him in the first place.

Knocking on his door, you instantly regretted it, not wanting to make a fool of yourself, but you had to face him sooner or later. The door surprisingly opens, presenting you with a tired Leon dressed in nothing but his boxers. You probably just woke him up.

When you meet his soft gaze, his brows furrow, and he scowls. It’s been a while since he’s looked at you, so you can take what you can get. 

“What do you want?” Leon dully asks, crossing his arms over his bare chest as he leans on the door’s framing. Okay, so he’s talking to you after a week of silence, granted, not like he used to, but it’s something.

“Why have you been avoiding me?” you counter bluntly, glaring at him. His facade crumbles, shoulders dropping as he frowns. He quickly recovers, scoffing and looking anywhere but at you.

“What are you talking about–” 

“I’m not a dumbass, Leon. Just why? Are you okay?” you quickly cut off his poor excuse of a response. He shakes his head, his messy hair concealing his eyes as he tries to reply.

The look you’re sending him gives him goosebumps as if you’re reading him with just a glance. You are, and it’s terrifying yet so arousing that you can do so easily. Your eyes don’t leave him, trying to figure out his problems. It’s equally arousing how much you care for him, looking through him like he’s glass. 

His composure crashes, stuttering an answer you’re unable to pick up. You stare at him, confused at his sudden nervous behaviour. 

Leon’s selfish for wanting you all to himself. He doesn’t want to hurt himself with the rejection that you may throw his way. He doesn’t want to feel like that even though your actions say otherwise. He wants to tell you that, but what he says is much more pathetic.

“God, it’s you,” he repeats. The look of disappointment that crosses your face hurts. It hurt that he’s the one that made you look so broken so quickly.

“What?” Your voice falters, but you’re curious despite the ache in your chest. You’re not surprised. Maybe, a bit shattered.

“Not like that. I mean, fuck, I don’t know how to say this.” He awkwardly scratches the back of his neck as he tries to formulate his words, a blush dispersing on his pale cheeks. 

“I was fucking mad, okay? Not at you– never at you. I hated how those guys looked at you. I know I shouldn’t feel like this. You’re my roommate, for fucks sake, but–” He continues to ramble on, and the words he spews give you whiplash. 

You’re simultaneously flattered by his words and pissed. He was acting like a prick because he was jealous. As much as you were annoyed by his immature behaviour, you couldn’t ignore the butterflies swarming your stomach.

You impulsively crash your lips into his. He stops his rambling, startled, before melting into the kiss, his long lashes fluttering close. His plush lips move softly against yours. The kiss is soft and much better than either of you could’ve imagined.

Pulling away from him, you catch your breath, huffing, “You dumb boy.”

His cheeks darken in colour, the blush leading to the expanse of his chest. He grips your hips, tugging you closer to his body. You feel his dick hardening in confined in his boxers, pressed to your lower stomach.

“Fuck,” Leon gasps softly. You tuck strands of hair behind his ear, your nose bumping together as you admire his pretty face.

“All that from a little kissing?” you breathed against his bruised lips, your fingers toying with the waistline of his boxers. “You want me to help you, baby boy?”

“Yes, please.” 

You frown, moving away from his hold. His face falls, his brows furrow in confusion as he pouts. “C’mon, Leon. You really think you’re going to get to cum that easily after ignoring me?”

“‘M sorry. I didn’t mean to. Please touch me. I– I’ll be your good boy,” he pleads, moving back closer to you, wrapping his arms around your midsection. 

“Okay, sweetheart. You’ll get to cum if you behave.”

He captures your lips in a quick kiss, moaning softly before pulling away. He takes your hand, leading you into his bedroom, and you observe the new surroundings. Even though you’ve been roommates for nearly a year, you never saw the inside of his room. Posters of bands you weren’t familiar with were on the walls of his room. 

“On the bed, baby,” you coo, and Leon shuffles on the navy blue sheets of his bed, leaning against the headboard. You crawl onto the soft sheets, straddling him as you seat yourself on his plush thighs. His warm palms shoot to rest on your waist, softly squeezing them.

He tugs you closer to him, pressing your chest flat against his. Leon gasps softly, his nipples rubbing against the coarse fabric of your tank top.

“S’much better than I imagined,” he sighs, guiding your hips so your clothed cunt drags along his prominent bulge. He groans, feeling your cunt dripping, soaking through your panties and shorts. 

You move back from him, halting your movements on his hardening cock as you’re sat on his thighs once more. Your hands grip his arms, and even though he’s stronger than you, he ceases his motion. It’s so fucking hot how this huge man submits to you. 

“You’ve thought about me in your lap?” you tease, palming his erection through his boxers. The head leaks precum, staining the delicate fabric. “Playing with your pretty cock?”

“Mhm,” he whines softly, bucking his hips to your warm touch. His head tilts back, knocking the wooden headboard quietly as he writhes at your touch. 

“Ohh, you poor thing. Cummin’ in your hand wishing it was mine,” you mock, pulling Leon’s boxers down to reveal his throbbing dick flushed pink. It aches for your touch, twitching and smearing his precum on the dark curls on his happy trail.

“Fuck, yes.” Leon whimpers when you wrap your digits around his cock, squeezing it, oozing more precum, coating your fingers as you stroke him slowly. His hips eagerly thrust to meet your movement.

“So, so pretty.” The blush on his cheeks somehow deepens at your words. His head is spinning, and not just from your touch. He roughly grips his silken sheets, bunching them up. You thought he was pretty?

“God, baby, you’re the prettiest.” 

Fuck, had he said that out loud? 

His back arches as he nears his orgasm, pleasure rushing through his body. His thighs tremble as he spills his cum, coating your hand. You don’t stop tugging on his weeping cock, living for the little cries he makes from being overstimulated.

“Don’t, m’ sensitive– shit,” Leon whines, and you finally take your hand off his spent dick, admiring his cum dribbling onto your fingers. Leon props himself up, chest heaving as he tries to collect himself.

“Did I say you could cum?” you tease. Leon’s eyes widen for a second before pleading for forgiveness.

“I- I didn’t mean to. God, I’m so sorry. I’ll be your good boy.” He sniffles softly, and you take pity on his cries. You’ll punish him another time.

“It’s okay, honey. Can you open wide f’me?” you say. Leon does as he’s told, parting his lips and sticking his tongue out. You wished you could take a picture. 

You place your index and middle finger on his tongue, pressing down. Leon wraps his lips around your fingers, sucking his cum off them. Moaning softly, he peers up at you through his lashes and gags when you push your fingers further down.

“You’re such a slut, Leon,” you say, pulling your fingers out his mouth, lips slicked with his spit. You flicked his nipples, causing him to moan loudly. His cock is beginning to harden once more.

“I’m your slut.”

“Think you can go one more round, baby?” you asked, hovering over his rock-hard cock, before sinking down. Your drenched pussy through your thin shorts stimulates his overly sensitive dick, and he groans softly, squeezing your waist.

“Wanna take care of you too, angel,” he murmurs into your ear as you grind yourself onto his erection. “Can I eat you, please?”

“Maybe next time, honey.”

“Fuck, okay. Can you kiss me?” You press your lips to his softly, and he whimpers sweetly into your mouth. Pulling away from him, you take your shorts and panties off, and they’re fucking drenched. Leon tugs your tank top off, and you giggle at his eagerness.

Your body, so soft and warm, is pressed against Leon’s. It’s almost enough to make him cum, and he’s not enough inside you yet. You slide your dripping cunt along his shaft, ensuring he’s fully hard. Leon fucking whines each time the tip of his cock nicks your entrance, begging to plunge in.

Every time the tip nudges your clit, your cunt clenches, and each flutter sends his eyes rolling to the back of his head.

“Please, angel. Fuck me. Use me– I don’t care. ‘M all yours.” You guide his cock to your entrance before finally sinking down slowly. The tip enters you with a soft moan. He’s so fucking thick. Once fully sheathed in you, you grip his shoulders for support.

“You’re all mine to use, right? F- Fuck, you’re stretching me so good, Leon.”

Your tight walls hug him so tightly, and when you bounce on his cock, each drag of his sensitive dick adds to the building pressure in his tummy. He filled you so good, reaching spots you didn’t think were possible as you used him like your toy.

Leon thrusts his hips to meet your pace, your ass slapping his thighs, making obscene sounds. He can’t get enough of you. From your tits bouncing as you rode his cock, or the expression you hold when he hits that special spot. 

It’s so much better than he has imagined.

He rubs your clit with his thumb, a broken whimper leaving him when your gummy walls clench around him tightly. The pressure in his tummy was rising, and you were no better as he played with your clit.

“‘M so close, sweetheart. Can I cum in you, please?” he pleads, his hips stuttering to meet each of your moves. His pink lips parted, eyes barely stayed open, and he looked utterly ruined.

“Yes, baby.” You trail kisses along his neck, sucking marks along the column of his throat. You’re pleased with yourself that you’re the reason he has those marks now. Each bruise you suck on his flesh adds another butterfly to his tummy. He’s all yours now.

“Cum with me, please.”

After a few more thrusts, the pressure within him bursts he cums inside you, filling you with his warm seeds. You climax along with him. Your cunt spasms around his sensitive cock, gushing its arousal, clinging to his happy trail.

You collapse on top of him, your head falling on his shoulder. Leon kisses the top of your head, nuzzling into your hair. You try to get off to clean yourself and Leon up, but arms encircle your waist, preventing you from doing so.

“Stay with me, sweetheart. Don’t want you leaving.”

You comply, laying with him, your skin, sticky with sweat and cum, clings to his as you both enjoy each other’s embrace.

[ateez-himari]

SOULMATES ; BONDED FOR LIFE (?)

ATEEZ's lovebirds revealed to have taken the next step after a slip of the tongue (?)

May 22, 2025 (12:27PM)

Epikase sparked conversation throughout social media platforms due to the wording used by one of their guests, Ateez's Mingi, when asked to speak on balancing aspects such as his romantic relationship with their maknae, working life and personal time following the brief mention of children. While in media content such as live broadcasts or logbooks the rapper can be heard refering to Himari with 'angel' or 'my girlfriend', this time he seemed to take a different approach that was likely not meant to slip out in the moment - judging from the shock on the members' faces along with his own - by using the term 'fiancée', which would imply that during their time of inactivity on the internet the two might have gotten engaged away from prying eyes.

"Balancing my career with domestic life is the hardest part about dating within the industry in my experience. Being an idol is something that I love, but at the same time seeing couples living normally together without pressure from the media makes me jealous in a sense...I'm turning 26 this year and there are many instances where I want to live like that with my fiancée. Sorry, my girlfriend." Mingi on Epikase (EPIK HIGH on YouTube)

This could very well have been nothing more than a slip of the tongue as the artist has been teasing their fanbase about their engagement for quite some time, yet what is leading netizens to conclusions of secrecy is the fact that not once had the word ever been used when fueling the mystery ; meaning that it would have had to be spoken many times in private. Many more supporting points were brought back to public attention such as the fact that the lovers revealed having purchased an apartment as of last month - though they each remain in assigned dorms during active schedules - and the couple bands that they used to wear on their indexes being moved to their ring fingers. Amateur detectives have even noticed significant difference in the piece of jewelry worn by the young woman, pointing out that the diamond details were previously absent as it was nothing more than what appeared to be some type of polished metal adjacent material.

The last piece of damning evidence was provided by the couple themselves several days prior to the video's release ; a TikTok video using an audio with the words 'I like your last name...can I have it?', which suggests that the teasing might have ground to stand on after all. Mingi had previously stated on their messaging platform that should they truly be engaged, neither was looking to hold a wedding any time soon due to group activity being at its peak, so even if the two of them had taken the next step in their relationship it is unlikely that netizens would receive news of a ceremony in the coming year. The announcement of parenthood that some have been joking about ever since the episode aired sees slightly more grim pushback as the young woman has been somewhat open about the accident's impact on her fertility, confirming that she will unfortunately never bear children.

Discourse was inevitably sparked by these speculations however as some netizens still voice their wishes to see her involved with Seventeen's Mingyu once more following his heartbreaking confession on a recent live stream. Regardless of the social media happenings, neither artists nor company have made statements regarding the rumors so fans will have to continue gathering what scarce evidence is provided by media content. If they are engaged, congratulations to the happy couple, and if not, perhaps the rapper's strong desire will make it a reality.

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Taglist ; @prbywoo

[aphroditepill]

Random request for funzies. What about a skye x actress reader where you were close friends (like Gemma) that had a falling out because of the drug thing and she’s trying to reconnect with you ?

Could I? Should I?

Skye Riley x Actress!Reader

Word Count: 1k ^_^ (1,046)

Angst + fluff

Warnings: Descriptions of Violence, Drug usage and mentions of wounds

a/n: Sorry for being inactive, i've been busy and have been doing everything but writing.. I’m so sorry if there are any errors, NOT proofread at all lmfao

This just might be split into three parts!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

You hear your phone go off, it has been a long day for you. Having roughly about three interviews up and down New York City. You had just finished your laptop work and now head over to the bathroom to finish the night. While you brush your teeth, your phone vibrates against the marble of your counter.

Having the brush on your mouth, with a sigh you go over to your phone thinking it was your manager or so. Your face lights up at the words “Incoming call - Skye” She wanted to facetime you.

You’re quick to answer, still having the toothpaste all over your mouth. Skye looks at her phone and emits a laugh at your state, contagious enough you laugh as well.

“Seems like you’re having quite the night arent you?” She says.

You wash yourself before coming back into view.

“Sorry for the scene. What’s up?”

“I was wondering if you could come by tomorrow during rehearsals. Gemma has some friend things going on and I could use the company.”

Skye hears you ramble through your things, you find your charger before replying to her.

“Yeah sure, I've cleared my schedule finally, what more could these people want from me? Better be getting a new spine after this film because gosh, the back pain is killing me.” You say with a groan, you were already set for the night. Skye noticed your wear, it was the same pajamas she gifted you for early halloween.

“I feel you, try doing choreography for four days straight. Not ideal for someone who already has massive headaches.” You hear Skye mumble, she was also in her room getting ready for bed.

“Alright then i’ll show up tomorrow at… 9 am. Does that sound good to you?” You ask with a yawn, Skye gives you a nod.

“Yeah of course, i’ll pick you up this time-” A loud noise interrupted Skye, you see from your phone how Skye looks up, it must’ve been him again. Your face hardens and Skye can see it.

“How many times have I had to tell you to stop-” The call had hung up. You sighed as you left your phone charging, turning off your lamp and settling rightfully on your mattress and pillows.

You disliked Paul, loathed him even. There would be times when you would catch small wounds and marks on Skye, assuming it was from previous verbal and physical fights. No matter how many times she’s tried to hide it and not show, you saw right through her.

You knew Skye for as long as you could remember, it would take much for her to get through you, and she knew it. You remember this night vividly, you’ve never seen Skye so… hostile.

You had a visit with Skye and in the midst of it an argument broke out. You knew Skye had her insane take of drugs. You never truly understood it.

Why do that? Paul being under the influence also did not help.

You still have your scar from it, a fully healed slit on your wrist, Paul had thrown a vase at Skye that day, luckily you were there and took the hit. You despised the wound, why did Skye go back to him?

The whole public press and interviews between both of them and their fake chemistry disgusted you. You reasoned with Skye various times, but you always found yourself back at square one. Stupid man, and to think he was in the same business industry as you. An actor.

Did Elizabeth even know of this? Assumed not due to her lack of parenting in this case. You rub your face in annoyance and in attempts to rub the thoughts away. Your phone goes off again, You get your phone to see a message from Skye,

“See you tomorrow.”

==============================

You rub your eyes at the sound of your alarm, it was 8:30 am. With a fat stretch you hop off your bed and begin to change and fix yourself before Skye.

Same routine as always, brush your teeth, wash your face, strangefully stare at yourself in the mirror and then change.

It was simple, baggy jeans, a slightly oversized black t-shirt and an orange jacket just in case. Fixing your hair, you apply white shoes on and have a glass of water. You already had a small backpack for your things, before you knew it, Skye had messaged you to come outside. What a start to your day.

You locked your front door and walked out, going down the elevator and waving your goodbyes at the receptionists and security, in front of you was the black SUV ready to go.

Hopping in the car you sat in the back next to Skye. Elizabeth nods at you in acknowledgement while Joshua is the complete opposite, you made sure to give him a proper interaction later on unlike most people who cross paths with him. Poor guy.

“Glad you can make it today. How was yesterday?” Skye wore a casual outfit for the rehearsal, having her long black hair tied up and having gray sweatpants and a black compression shirt on.

“It was quite a long day yesterday…also. Are you alright? Last night I-”

“Yeah yeah no worries, just a small misunderstanding.” Skye cut you off. You disliked when Skye did this, you knew better than to pry open at the walls she built, she was stubborn and you loved it. But in this case…

“Okay.” You whisper. Skye did feel bad when she dismisses you like this, but she couldn't have you involved with this. Not you too, especially after that specific night.

The drive was silent, but then there was Joshua. You had a pleasant talk with him in the car, until Elizabeth started talking about media business, Joshua joined in.

It was quite the long hour…

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

[leaentries]

Bad day

luke hughes x chubby!reader

a/n- hey y’all! so guess who’s not dead 😋 i’m so so sorry i’ve been so inactive this past month! i’ve been dealing with college starting back up and my new job. but now that i’m back to semi-normal schedule, im hoping to start posting more! so please don’t be afraid to send in any thoughts or requests you may have! also, im so sorry if this is shit, i didn’t really know where i was going when i started writing. i just wanted to get something out for y’all to read😭

p.s- gif is not mine, credits to the owner!!

some days truly never seemed to end.

even though it was only a wednesday, the bleakness of the sky and air ruined every seemingly good thing coming y/n’s way. her day started off great. waking up next to her boyfriend who gave her plenty of good morning sleepy kisses and “i love you’s.” luke even went the extra mile and warmed up her morning shower, paired with a fresh towel straight out of the dryer.

as she stepped into the shower, she felt confident that she was going to have a fantastic day. her classes were easy on wednesday and only lasted till early afternoon. although she knew that luke would be gone for practice by the time she returned home, she was excited to lounge around and be lazy for the day.

only, her day took a turn for the worst.

walking to her first class of the day, the coffee she held in her hand, that luke put so much effort into, somehow managed to slip from her grasp. the cup went tumbling into the pavement, leaving ugly light brown splotches in its wake. frustrated, she picked up the soaked cardboard.

y/n took a deep breath and quickly disposed of the cup, before continuing her journey to class. even though she felt bad for wasting the coffee, she was still set on having a great day. her class went by decently fast, ending when the professor decided to go on a tangent about his recent disk golf tournament.

on wednesdays she only had two classes, her next one being the longest. sitting down for her next lecture, she noticed the thigh portion of her jeans had begun to rip. y/n couldn’t help the feeling of dread that filled her body. those were her favorite jeans and the store in which she bought them, had discontinued this style.

sighing, she placed her head down on her arms. she decided to close her eyes, since she got to class early anyways. what seemed to be a few seconds, quickly turned into her feeling a jab to her side. she lifted her head, eyes squinting due to the bright lights. she looked over to her desk partner. julie looked back with concerned eyes.

“dude, are you okay?”

puzzled, y/n replied, “yeah….why?”

“you just slept through the entire lecture. which, by the way, prof decided to assign some stupid essay on. he said it’s gonna be due friday.”

with wide eyes, y/n stared at the clock on the wall.

i slept through the whole thing?

hitting her like a train, she turned back to julie.

“wait wait wait. an essay? shit, i don’t even know what he talked about today.”

worry gripped her like a vice. how the hell was she ever gonna get an essay done about a lecture she didn’t even listen to? there goes her plan on being lazy for the rest of the day.

“don’t worry, i got you girl. i made sure to take some major notes for you.” julie handed y/n the purple notebook, “just make sure to bring it to class on friday.” with that, julie gathered her things and left the classroom.

still stuck on the fact that she slept through the entire lecture, y/n slowly began to pack up and make her way home. rushing to her car, she made the drive as fast as possible.

not to her surprise, she was greeted with an empty apartment. she would normally be a little sad at this, but she took it with grace. the quiet will give her time to go over julie’s notes and start her essay.

❥.

by the time luke found his way through the door, it was easily past six.

“angel?” luke called into the open apartment. “y/n?” he called again. when he still received no response he walked to their shared bedroom, only to find her hunched over a desk with headphones in her ears.

he walked up to stand behind her, gently placing his hands on her shoulders and a kiss to the top of her head. her body jumped slightly, startled at the sudden touch.

“what the fuck, lukey?” she turned to him.

“awww, im sorry baby.” luke responded, chuckling slightly.

though his smile began to fall from his face when he saw the deep line of worry and distress around her eyebrows. luke felt his own furrow.

“what’s wrong, angel?” luke felt his own worry begin to set in. he could have sworn she was in a great mood this morning, recalling when she told him her plans for the day.

frustrated tears began to fill her eyes, “today has just utterly been shit. first, i spilt the coffee you spent so much time making me. then, i fell asleep durning my lecture and missed the entire thing. and to top it all off, my professor decided to assign an essay on said lecture. so now i’m having to bullshit this assignment, which means i’ll probably get a horrible grade.”

by the end of her rant, hot tears found their way from her eyes and down her cheeks. luke’s hands quickly reached to wipe them away.

“don’t cry, pretty girl. it’s okay.” luke said in a hushed voice. he swiveled the chair around, crouching to look up at her down casted face. he placed his hands on her plushy thighs, not failing to appreciate the warmth they radiated under his palms.

“hey, hey. look at me, y/n” at the sound of her name, she tilted her head up slightly, meeting his concerned filled eyes.

“you did nothing wrong. that coffee took me all of about 30 seconds to make and i can help you with your essay. i promise you, you are doing great, baby. you’ll do fine on this essay and it sounds to me like you needed the sleep anyways.” his hand reached to cradle her damp, round cheek.

“i’m sorry. i don’t know why i’m upset. it’s not like anything horrible happened. it-it’s just today was supposed to be so good. a-and,” a small sob cut through the air. taking a deep breath she continued, “and i’ve been doing this essay for the past 4 hours. i feel like i’m getting no where.”

luke’s heart hurt at the sight of his girlfriend so drained. it was a complete 180 from the cheerful attitude she had that morning. he slowly stood up, reaching over to close her laptop. she opened her mouth in protest, but was quickly cut off. “before you try and stop me, you need a break, sweetheart. you’ve made plenty of progress on your essay for today. come lay down with me. we can call in some take out and watch a movie.”

luke’s eyes gazed pleadingly into her own.

“but what if i can’t get it finished by tomorrow? it’s due at the beginning of class friday.” luke was fast to ease her worry, “i promise i will help you finish it tomorrow. i don’t have practice, so we can spend the whole day making this essay a+ material. now, go change and meet me in the living room.”

with a smile and another kiss to her head, luke walked out of the bedroom. attempting to brush off the last thoughts of her essay, y/n got up and walked to the closet. she grabbed a pair of sweats and one of luke’s big sweatshirts. putting it on reminded her of how thoughtful he is, always making sure to get them a size bigger so they’ll be extra oversized.

she smiled as the scent of his cologne filled her nose.

now completely changed, she walked out, only to be met with what seemed to be every blanket in the house set up on the couch. next to it laid plenty of her favorite snacks, along with her favorite drinks. with wide eyes, she turned to meet luke’s nervous form.

“w-what’s all this?” she gestured toward the couch. luke walked up to her, placing his hands on her full hips.

“i just wanted to do something for you, make your day a bit better. do you like it?” luke’s eyes were hopeful.

“of course, i love it.” she looked up at luke’s face, “thank you. for everything.” luke flashed his beaming grin.

“anything for you, angel,” he whispered. luke leaned down to press his lips into her soft ones. his hands pulled her hips to meet his, deepening the kiss. y/n found her own hands finding home in the curls on the nape of his neck. she gripped his hair, slightly pulling at the intensity. luke’s light groans filled the apartment.

forcing themselves apart, y/n placed her hands on luke’s shoulders as he tried to chase her lips. a whine escaped his throat, “whyyy? i want to kiss you.” a laugh bubbled out of her mouth, bringing a smile to luke’s face.

“as much as i would love to keep kissing you, i want to go lay down. and that movie isn’t going to watch itself.” with this, luke took liberty of going to lay across the couch first, opening his arms to welcome y/n into them. she didn’t hesitate to find comfort in his arms, laying her head on his chest.

luke grabbed one of the many blankets, covering them both. he placed his chin on the top of her head, grabbing the remote lying next to him.

“alright angel, what do you want to watch?”

[moomshroomsoup]

Hello, I wanted to ask why you've stoped posting on your YouTube channel, is everything ok?

Hi!! Yeah, everything's good, thanks for asking. In my personal life, I've been somewhat busy with classes because I'm a training actor :) I also jump around different fandoms due to changing hyperfixations, so sometimes I step in and out of the Moomin fandom (which I still love very much)

Unfortunately, I've just dropped the ball on bigger projects I was working on. I plan to finish some of them, which will hopefully be out before another century passes. Sorry about the VERY irregular upload schedule, it's a byproduct of having adhd + not knowing what to post. I appreciate when I'm missed, but it's nothing to worry about!

And the reason I'm never on this tumblr is because I made it on my old email before I knew sideblogs existed. Now I'm mostly on @mushiver (in the gravity falls fandom rn) and @good-soupmens (slightly inactive but it's good omens)

[lupusbaby]

hi!! you don't have to respond to this at all but i recently found out my mother may have POTS (she's been living with chronic fatigue since college and known it, but never had a diagnosis for anything) and i was wondering if i could do anything to help? she, my sister, and i all have issues with chronic illness (PCOS for me- not sure if that counts but it definitely affects my life- and my sister is undiagnosed but deals with severe chronic pain) and i want to support them as much as i can. if you have any resources you could send my way that would be lovely!

also huge shout out to you. chronic illness sucks and it takes incredible strength to make it through each day. may your spoons be plentiful and may rest come to your body.

This is so sweet, thank you for loving and caring for them :)

As for support, extra understanding is always helpful. Sometimes plans need to change last minute. Chronic illness can make you so "unreliable" with scheduled activities, and a lot of us hold a lot of guilt about that. In these cases, verbal reassurance works for me, so maybe your family would like that too. Offering a listening ear is great, as well as checking in with them about their needs.

For POTS, keep some salty snacks and extra water in your car/purse/etc. because sodium helps with regulating body fluid volume and orthostatic adrenaline spikes, which both can make people with POTS feel faint.

As for long term- offer up accessible activities. Exercise can be really beneficial for POTS and chronic pain. For people with POTS, that might mean slow swimming or chair yoga to avoid getting symptomatic. I do aqua exercise to help with my chronic pain and POTS, and my blood pressure and heart rate are super stable and normal while in the pool. I also have one of those under-desk peddlers to help keep my knee joints lubricated when I'm more inactive due. Comfy nights in, slow walks, activities that are indoors/temperature regulated, etc.

Like most chronic illnesses, stress is a big trigger. Try to help your people manage their stressors. Also just pay attention when you're with them- glazed eyes, swaying, leaning, panting, shortness of breath, etc. can all mean we don't feel right in that moment. Sitting down and having some water is a good idea at that time.

I'm just rambling now, but I hope some of this is helpful. POTS can affect so many things, like temperature regulation, energy levels, etc. Here is a link that explains it better than I can.

Good luck to all of you, and I hope you find some ease and happiness :)

[naptimeclown]

This is a long rant

Me and my partner both baffling and confusing every dietician/health coach our doctor and insurance tries to set us up with.

Me and my partner are both very large people. We both have always been large since our respective childhoods. My partner used to work out a lot, mostly weight lifting, but due to work schedules and cost he stopped. He actually weighed more while doing that because of ya know, muscle. But his doctor at that time(not current) saw it was a positive anyways because of his weight to begin with even if it was literally his muscles atrophying, not fat loss.

We both work retail jobs where we stand for 8 hours a day, lifting heavy boxes and walking back and forth from one end of the store to the other multiple times a day. So we're not exactly inactive. We do core exercises and stretches in the evening for about 10-15 minutes because we both have back pain for various reasons. He goes to physical therapy twice a month, our doctor advised I do the stretches with him to also benefit from them.

We only eat out once a week on our only day off because we're already out going to appointments or any errands/shopping that needs to be done so we don't have time or gas to run home and make a meal just to drive back out and then home again later.

I cook dinner every night. We don't eat prepackaged meals or microwave dinners because it costs more than if I were to make something. We eat very little red meat, simply because it usually costs more. I always make sure there's at least one vegetable included in what I make or as a side and I try to change it up so we're not just eating the same thing over and over. We don't eat a lot of butter. I mostly use olive oil for cooking when I do. If we eat bread it's usually whole wheat. I make fruit smoothies for me and my partner before work. I don't add sugar, I use plain Greek yogurt for protein. We make our own lunches to bring to work. I make sure to drink at the very least 30oz of water a day if not 64. And that's usually accompanied by herbal or green tea.

We're still both fat. We're not losing weight. And this makes dieticians very confused. Our doctor made us go to a dietician because of my partners back pain, the insurance required he try doing something about his weight before they would approve any testing. The first time we went in for the initial appointment, had all the measurements taken, body fat percentage and whatever. Then we go into her office to discuss our eating and activity habits and we explain all this to her. She looked lost. I could see her brain churning as she tried to think of some sort of advice to give us or something to point out that we were doing wrong. She even admitted it. "Normally when a patient comes in they have a direct issue that we can work on, like drinking only soda or eating too much fast food but I don't know what to tell you." So she just had us go slowly over it again and most of it was her going "great." "Those are good choices." "That makes sense." So she didn't bother scheduling a follow up. The insurance still hasn't let him schedule an MRI. We still haven't found out whats causing his back problems and it's gotten to the point where the PT hurts for him to do but now they're requiring he do a certain amount of PT before they'll approve the MRI. They did find something on the ultrasound but "it's probably not causing the pain and it doesn't look like it needs addressing."

That was 10 months ago. Nothing has changed. We're still fat. He still has back pain. I actually gained a pound since then. Just one. And it was after I had been home for two weeks after surgery last month and couldn't be as active cause my incision were healing.

Now my insurance is having me talk to a dietician over the phone once a month for weight management. Apparently I'll get 25$ in 'credit' for doing this. I don't care. Went through the same thing. She asked about my eating habits and activity. I told her the same thing. With occasional acknowledgements like before. "Good..that's good." "Exactly, that's what I'd suggest." "Good." She sounded bewildered. Again not seeming to know how I could improve or change. She set a very vague goal of 'keeping helpful habits' as what we'd work on and scheduled our next phone call.

10 months from now I'm still going to be fat. Next year I'll still be fat. The year after that I'll still be fat. And after that and after that. And still doctors and insurance companies are going to try to make things difficult for me and my partner to get basic medical care because obviously being fat is our own fault and we're doing something wrong so we don't deserve to feel better. I'm going to continue to get called a horrible fatass by angry customers at work because my weight is obviously a moral failure and I'm fat because I'm a terrible person. And only bad people are fat. Someone actually left a review on Google maps for my partners workplace that essentially boils down to "the fat guy that works here is mean" because people assume the worse from him because of his size.

I don't even really have a point. I'm just tired of us being treated like this. We're just people. Our weight isn't a moral failing. It's not something we've 'done to ourselves'. We're just fat. Some people are just fat.

[pro-bee-sisters]

Hi Y'all!

Hi everyone, long time no see, hasn't it?

Anyways, I want to say that I'm truly sorry if the blog seems inactive again. I know that when I first came on here, I made a promise to both Chloe and Zoe fans to not only give them the fanwork and the positive relationship they deserve, but also both the amount of love they both need; especially after that disaster clusterfuck known as Season 5 did to them both.

However, now that the year will be ending, now I feel like is the time to start over and try again!

As I'd said in the past before, it's going to take time to actually start writing again due to my massive IRL busy schedule and dealing with health (physically, mentally, etc...) as a whole. 2023 wasn't 100% the best year for me as I kept falling down and relapsing, but now, it's about time I make a change for real this time!

I will admit, I don't have all the pieces together yet because as of November 24th, I'd been on a 1 month and a half hiatus from the internet; focusing on my mental health and other aspects that help me get through the day and keep going.

Regardless, by 2024, I promise that things will start making a difference not only here but on my other 3 blogs as well (@muggle-born-princess; @princessgemsart and @pens-and-gems).

It's gonna take time for me to get back on track, but I promise: this Queen Bee / Vesperia stan will definitely feel and be healthier and happier once the time comes!

I hope you all understand. Please remember to follow me on my other blogs mentioned above if you haven't already, and as our lovely Bee Sisters say:

BUZZ ON!

[geotjwrs]

Hi :) not a request just a check in

hey! thanks for checking up on me. i appreciate it. i assumed that some of y'all might've noticed that ive been inactive since these past few weeks due to a busy schedule and i wasn't able to update my account as i've had promised. i'm deeply sorry but today is going to be worse than ever. i've thought of maybe taking a short break or lets just say a hiatus. i'll be back soon and hopefully will make it up to all of u :) i appreciate to those who supported me ever since. i'll comeback with lots of updates like some of y'all requested. adieu!

[moonofsoleanna]

Apologies for the inactivity. My scheduled history fact post was delayed due to an attack on Soleanna by a foreign nation. Elise was… kidnapped during the attack. It turns out she had been receiving threats from one of our neighbors due to trade disputes.

Not to worry, though - Elise has been retrieved. And I’ve made it rather clear to the few surviving government officials in that country that, in no uncertain terms, Soleanna is off limits. As it turns out, demonstrating that I am, in fact, a god, does wonders for diplomacy.

Normal posts will resume once Elise’s condition no longer requires a significant portion of my attention. I hope you all understand.

[luvbxnni]

hi all

i wanted to acknowledge my inactivity and also explain. it's nothing serious but i recently had a surgery that set me back on all the responsibilities i have, so i've been needing to like lock in 😭

also, i have (and suffer from) TERRIBLE adhd so i gain and lose motivation to do things at complete random. one of those things being writing/finishing stories

i just want to ask that everyone is patient (not like anyone has been harassing me to be active LOL) and just know that i WILL continue any series i've started, but there may be long or short periods in between the updates due to the things i said above. i am VERY active on tumblr when it comes to reading, but posting is different for me bc it takes time

for example, i may post like 4 posts in a week due to a sudden urge in motivation, and then not post anything for two weeks, it rlly just depends on my motivation and how much free time i have on my hands

i LOVE to write and esp on here because everyone is so so sweet and kind, and ya'll are just creative asf 😭 so thank you in advance to everyone for understanding, and if you don't take anything away from this except one thing, let it be this: anything i start, i WILL finish but it most likely won't be on a consistent schedule.

LOVE LOVE LOVE everyone who's supported me and reblogged/liked my posts! u guys are awesome sauce 🩷

[ateez-himari]

I AM STILL; INK-BOND

The documentary's rawness leads to an interesting discovery concerning the maknaes of K-Pop groups BTS & ATEEZ

December 5, 2024 (6:01PM)

Disney Plus recently released Jungkook's documentary 'I AM STILL', which follows the vocalist through the making of 'Golden' as well as his journey to becoming a soloist with international reach. Numerous clips have been going viral on social media platforms and most of them feature the producing genius behind his new voice, who just so happens to be his best friend, ATEEZ's maknae - Himari.

"This is my partner in crime, my talented producer, my best friend and our angel voiced vocalist...Himari." Jungkook introduced when she visited him on the set of '3D'. "We've been with each other for over 11 long years."

Most instances are simply them working long hours alongside one another, walking about cities during rare moments of free time or even Jungkook accompanying the vocalist to the airport, as Korea had heavy schedules waiting for her. However, it was not the sweet maknaes bonding nor being emotional that caught the most traction but rather them enjoying some short inactivity.

While the artists relaxed in the hotel pool wearing bathing suits more revealing than they would usually be allowed on camera, the young woman's high hairstyle allowed netizens to notice a tattoo at the back of her neck - running along to the near middle of her spine. Chinese characters forming the words 'until death' are written vertically, with a black traditional dragon in the midst of them, and while searching through the man's collection it was also found that he had an almost exact copy, with the only difference being that his own is white.

The widely agreed upon speculation is that the colors represent the other person through the Chinese philosophy of Yin and Yang energy - which are opposites that balance one another - as Himari aligns more with Yin whilst Jungkook aligns with Yang, which are opposite to what they have inked onto their bodies. The mythical creature represents many things but due to the possibility of them having a depiction of the other, it likely stands for protection in this case - to symbolize that they will watch over their counterpart 'until death'. It is also possible that it follows a Japanese legend stating that if a koi fish successfully climbs a waterfall, it would be rewarded by the gods through bring turned into a powerful dragon - which could have been used to show their strength of character and acknowledge the hardships that they have both been through.

The ink does not seem to hold the vibrancy of a recent tattoo which means it has likely been a few years since its original creation and although very few have come to doubt the reality of their incredibly close relationship, it likely erased any semblance of suspicion. We can only hope to see more of these two friends in the coming months.

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[lingshanhermit]

Lingshan Hermit：When Confucius and Shakyamuni Meet Voltaire and Simone de Beauvoir

I am not a perfect person, but I am an extreme perfectionist. As such, I hold both myself and others to extraordinarily high expectations and demands. Sometimes this creates slight tension in my relationships with those around me. As an extreme perfectionist, I have little tolerance for others' foolishness. Even more than others' foolishness, I cannot tolerate my own inaction, and what I find most intolerable is wasting time. My WeChat public account tells me that in 2024, I wrote 346,000 characters, averaging nearly a thousand characters per day. This comes close to meeting my personal standards. Over the past few years, I have been busy with dharma practice and writing. I've performed over nine hundred grand offering ceremonies and written hundreds of articles, which gives me some comfort that I haven't wasted my time. Because I've been so occupied with these matters, I rarely have time for other activities. So when someone asked me about my thoughts on that Hong Kong film, all I could tell them was that I hadn't seen it yet - I knew about the film and had wanted to watch it, but couldn't find the time. A few days ago, I finally found a gap in my schedule to watch this highest-grossing film in Hong Kong's history.

I quite liked this film—but don't misunderstand, when I say I liked it, it doesn't mean I agree with the messages it conveys. I liked it because I could see in it the state of many practitioners, witness the collision between Eastern tradition and Western thinking, and observe what happens when Confucius and Shakyamuni encounter Voltaire and Simone de Beauvoir. Hello Brother represents the state of many practitioners. Although he has spent his whole life as a Namo master performing traditional rituals to help the deceased escape from hell, he has never truly understood the meaning behind these traditional rituals. He simply follows the traditional requirements blindly, without knowing their true significance. Because the patriarchs said so, he says so; because the patriarchs did it that way, he does it that way. He has never questioned whether these words are correct or delved into their deeper meaning. From my observation, if a person doesn't want to deeply investigate the truth or falsity of something, it indicates that they don't actually believe it's true—subconsciously, they feel it wouldn't stand up to scrutiny.

Therefore, people like Hello Brother, although engaged in traditional professions, are easily led astray by seemingly reasonable but false teachings and easily conquered by Dao Sheng's apparently logical arguments. This is because they have never established true faith. I've met many people like Brother Hello. They don't truly understand Buddhist dharma, yet they practice it. Although they don't understand it, they don't know that they don't understand. When Buddhist dharma faces questioning, they still defend it. They defend it not because they're certain it's right, but because Buddhism has become part of them, become part of their "self," merged with their identity. In others' eyes, they are Buddhism, and Buddhism is them. Defending Buddhism means defending their face and dignity, their authority—that's why they persist.

On the surface, they appear to be traditional practitioners who act according to tradition, but due to a lack of genuine practice and guidance, they haven't truly and thoroughly embraced Buddhist dharma in their hearts. Therefore, when they encounter the alluring Western culture, they are quickly drawn to it. There are many such people in both Chinese and Tibetan regions. Though they may outwardly appear to be disciples of the Buddha, wearing Buddhist robes, their hearts have long since become followers of Voltaire and Steve Jobs.

For thousands of years in the past, practitioners in Tibet lived in seclusion from the mundane world, but circumstances have changed now. Today's monastics are no longer the isolated mountain dwellers of the past who were removed from worldly affairs. Mobile internet has become widespread even in remote monastery areas. Even if you're staying in a deep mountain monastery in Sichuan, you can still see the latest trending topics and receive mobile greeting messages. Compared to waking up at four in the morning to chant the monotonous Kangyur in the main hall all day, scrolling through TikTok is certainly more entertaining. Mobile internet has brought convenience and Buddhist teachings, but it has also brought the Devil and his daughters.

Compared to practitioners living in the deep mountains of Sichuan, those living in cities are exposed to even more new ideas and concepts. If they don't have firm right view, they will almost certainly be conquered by the demons. Many modern popular ideas can be traced back to Voltaire and Simone de Beauvoir, and we are fed these Voltaire flakes and Beauvoir nutrition drinks through our phones every day. This is why many practitioners, though seemingly practicing, are simultaneously individualists and social Darwinists (they probably don't realize these systems are completely opposite to Buddhist dharma). This is probably because the fruits of spiritual practice don't come as quickly as becoming an individualist or social Darwinist.

The results of spiritual practice usually manifest in subtle ways; sometimes you can't even feel the so-called results at all. After practicing dharma for several years, you can neither fly nor become wealthy, your interpersonal relationships remain as bad as ever, when you have a cold for several days chanting sutras doesn't help and it's only after taking a few pills of Molnupiravir that you get better, and your wife pressures you every day. This can't help but make you doubt the efficacy of Buddhist dharma. Most people's practice bears no fruit because they neither understand practice nor know how to practice, yet they don't attribute this to their lack of understanding—instead, they doubt the dharma and their teachers. Compared to practice, everyone can experience the benefits and immediate pleasure brought by Western culture. Because Western products are designed for the general public, even children and housewives can easily use them, while the threshold for Buddhist practice is quite high.

Many people prefer visible happiness, prefer precisely designed electronic products, prefer the convenience brought by technology, because most of us are shallow people—compared to the subtle changes produced by Buddhist practice, SUVs and Coca-Cola can provide more direct pleasure. Therefore, many people, while maintaining their Buddhist identity, have long since surrendered in their hearts to the civilization established by Aristotle, Shakespeare, and John Locke—that is their true refuge, their true object of devotion.

I know someone who immigrated to Australia. Once, for some reason, he suddenly started telling me about his faith in Buddhist dharma and his teachers, speaking at length about it. I asked him, "If that's the case, why did you go to Australia? So far from your teacher?" He said it was because they have a better social security system there. This really left me speechless. If you believe that good medical care or social welfare systems are your true security, then your thinking is no different from ordinary people. Your entire value system is not Buddhist.

It's like if you agree with Western medicine's claim that bone broth has no nutritional value, you would similarly believe that negative energy and dampness don't exist, would consider post-partum confinement a backward custom and think it's fine to eat ice right after giving birth. Likewise, you would have doubts about the existence of reincarnation and samsara. Because these concepts all come from the same source, they all belong to the same system. This system, since ancient Greek times, has only used that clumsy method to explore the world—only using test tubes and quantum computers to explore the world—they can only observe and analyze observable material phenomena, and are completely helpless when it comes to intangible things like qi, so they can only dismiss it as ancient people's imagination.

There are many people like him. They practice Buddhism, recite Guru Rinpoche's prayers, while simultaneously seeking security from the Western system. For such people, praying for the guru's blessings is a joke. Unlike them, Brother Hello didn't immigrate to America or Canada; he stayed in Hong Kong. Although he didn't emigrate to Canada, although he stayed in Hong Kong and continues to help people escape from hell, it doesn't mean he has no doubts about the traditions passed down from the patriarchs. Therefore, when the traditional culture he inherited encountered Western civilization's opposition, although he appeared to be defending and counterattacking, because he didn't truly understand tradition nor ever verify its correctness, his defense appeared powerless and pale. So when his daughter Man-yue questioned him, "Didn't the patriarchs have mothers?" all he could do was repeatedly mutter those few phrases.

His son went even further. This man who grew up in 1980s Hong Kong received a completely Western education. He merely treated the family inheritance as a business venture. From beginning to end, he had no faith in these ancient rituals, didn't believe these rituals could help the deceased, and didn't care whether they could help the deceased. He wasn't even interested in whether people continue to exist after death. To him, it was just a way to make a living, no different from selling furniture at Wing On Department Store in Sheung Wan. Because of his education, he would feel that selling furniture at Wing On would be more respectable than his inherited traditional profession. Therefore, he could convert to Catholicism for his son's extra school admission points and then convert back later.

There are actually many such people now; I can see many of them in Buddhist circles. These people grew up in a social environment completely opposite to Buddhist culture. They don't believe in Buddhist dharma or karma; they practice because their family members believe in Buddhism or because they inherited this profession. As for Dao Sheng, he represents those self-proclaimed clever secular businessmen who treat everything as a business from start to finish. To make more money, he thought up many clever reasons and excuses, telling Brother Hello that while the dead need to be saved from hell, the living need it even more.

To help the living escape hell, he could violate professional ethics by secretly letting the deceased's same-sex partner into the makeup room for a final meeting and even secretly giving them a portion of the ashes, could let Man-yue preside over the hell-breaking ritual, could break through all traditions—just to make clients feel he's a good person so they'll come back to him next time. The clients are pleased, but the effectiveness of saving souls from hell becomes quite questionable. While the feelings of the living certainly need to be respected, the focus of hell-breaking is not the living but the deceased. You can't jeopardize the deceased's future just to make the living happy.

Under such pretexts, you can do anything; all rules will be broken, all traditions will be destroyed, and eventually, all dharma lineages will cease to exist. It appears humanistic but is actually destroying the transmission. It seems considerate of others but is actually only for profit. And the underlying logic of all his actions is that death is the end of everything. This is what the devil wants to convey.

What Dao Sheng says seems reasonable but can only fool those who don't understand. I've met many people like him, and their common characteristic is that they know nothing about Buddhist dharma. Besides knowing nothing about Buddhist dharma, they also know nothing about themselves. They read a few books and think they've grasped the essence of Buddhist dharma, then question things based on their limited understanding. They think Buddhism is wrong about this and that, that it should change. According to their thinking, Buddhism shouldn't have so many restrictions on monasticism, shouldn't restrict who can become a monastic—anyone should be able to become a monastic. They even want to teach those who teach them dharma how to teach them dharma.

Usually, I ignore such people because they're just seeking attention. What they need is education from 0 to 10,000. And I am an impatient person, so this task should be done by someone more patient and compassionate. I bet even those patient and compassionate people would lose their patience and compassion with them. If they had basic logic and intelligence, they should know that a tradition that has been passed down for thousands of years must have profound reasons, because this is something verified by countless people who were smarter, more logical, and more critical than them, and every seemingly unreasonable rule might be based on the lessons of predecessors, so these are not things that can be overturned by someone who has just read a few books.

At Brother Hello's funeral, Dao Sheng announced that Man-yue would preside over the hell-breaking ritual. This decision was opposed by all the Namo masters present. Then Dao Sheng presented his reasons, which were quite shallow—so shallow that I couldn't take them seriously. He insisted that hell-breaking was just a ritual, with the main purpose being to comfort the living. When an outsider is too much of an outsider, what they say will leave all insiders speechless. Because it's too easy to refute and leaves people with no desire to refute it.

There are many such people in Buddhism. They don't understand Buddhist dharma, don't believe in it, and don't cherish it. Buddhist dharma is just a tool for them to seek profit. Such people only want to please others, only want others to think well of them. They use Buddhist dharma to do favors, and for this, they can sacrifice any tradition. This is probably what is meant by "convenience leading to degradation."

Over the past century, the spread of Western education has given many people the illusion that they can judge everything (they not only think they can judge right from wrong but also believe they can control destiny). Because most of the ideas they've received come from the tradition of Voltaire and Simone de Beauvoir, they tend to think many things in traditional culture are ancient people's imagination. For instance, Brother Hello's constant talk about women being impure, women having menstruation, and the patriarchs not liking it. Most modern people won't like such concepts because they have already been bound by Voltaire's ideas and consider these to be discrimination against women. I don't know if these are ancient people's imagination, but I have seen evildoers' faces grow increasingly dark, seen mandala jewels become covered in black ash when touched by those who seriously violate samaya, seen many things beyond your imagination and logic, so if someone tells me that negative energy is just ancient people's imagination, I can only feel compassion for them.

Brother Hello, as an inheritor of this profession, although he has spent his whole life helping people escape from hell and moving in traditional cultural circles, still faces the impact of Western culture and can feel the intense shock to his own faith. It's just that in traditional East Asian society, most people are bound by face—even if they have doubts, they won't show them, burying these doubts deep in their hearts for the sake of face. Especially people like Brother Hello; as a locally famous Namo master who breaks hell, he can only insist on the patriarchs' teachings, though he himself might not deeply believe them. No one knows if he might think at midnight about whether what he does has any meaning, whether people still exist after death, whether what he does actually helps them or if it's really as Dao Sheng says—that hell-breaking is just to help the living get rid of their psychological knots. This is an issue that exists for all practitioners, but most people are unwilling to touch this awkward question.

Most practitioners facing various new things coming at them are not prepared. They don't know how to respond, don't know how to reconcile the conflicts between their practice, faith, and modern ideas. Many people who are accustomed to self-deception will feel they don't have this problem—self-deception helps them cover up this issue, making them feel they don't have such problems. But no matter how you cover it up, the problem still exists.

When a freedom-loving individualist comes to a Buddhist community to practice, when they see the "Fifty Verses of Guru Devotion," see various precepts and requirements, they will feel that Buddhist practice is full of anti-freedom elements. You have to share the teacher's leftover food with your dharma brothers and sisters because that is the guru's siddhi and has blessings; you have to wash the teacher's socks, endure their bad temper; you must obey them completely, and if they tell you to quit your job and beg on King's Street, you have to do it. You must admit these things conflict greatly with what you learned at Princeton University.

In the past two hundred years, traditional culture has been shattered by modern Western civilization. Even practitioners and those who make a living from traditional culture are no longer firm in their beliefs—they just don't voice it. I understand why this situation has occurred. We face our phones every day, face girls dressed in anime style, face gene editing therapy, Trump coins and Hirokazu Kore-eda, face city trains speeding past on elevated bridges, face a drastically changing new world. Growing up in such an era, the scenes described in Buddhist sutras seem as unreal as dreams.

All along, I have believed that the root of most people's problems in modern society lies in their respecting what should be despised while despising what should be respected, respecting what shouldn't be respected while not respecting what should be respected—this is the root of many of our problems. From this perspective, this film is no different from those feel-good movies; it's also a feel-good movie, the only difference being that its feel-good nature is deeply hidden. It trampled and humiliated things we should respect in a special artistic way.

Dao Sheng and Man-yue probably represent the Hong Kong younger generation's understanding of this. They grew up in a Hong Kong society where English is the official language, and in their view, many traditional rules are just outdated garbage. Although she was raised on Brother Hello's work as a Namo master, this doesn't prevent her from seeing that system as merely a remnant of the old era. This isn't surprising—she grew up in Hong Kong society, using Octopus cards and drinking Yakult, with planes flying overhead every day. Although Hong Kong society has preserved much traditional culture, it still cannot resist the erosion of Western culture. Compared to the deceased, they believe the living are most important—actually, this isn't just their thinking, it's most modern people's thinking. You can find people who think this way in any city in mainland China. They are also followers of Voltaire and Simone de Beauvoir.

The terrifying aspect of this thinking is that it denies the existence of the deceased, making traditional rituals like hell-breaking lose their meaning, becoming mere formal cultural heritage—perhaps relics. In the letter left for Man-yue, Brother Hello told his daughter, "I didn't know those words were hurting you all along." He was referring to words about women being impure and such. These final words undoubtedly revealed his true values. Although he had been engaged in hell-breaking work and maintaining tradition, deep in his heart he had always been a modern person (someone with a Voltaire brain) rather than a traditional Chinese person. That's why he would feel those words hurt her.

East Asian culture, after more than 2000 years of fermentation and misinterpretation among ordinary people, has finally manifested as an extremely unskillful education method. East Asian parents are accustomed to educating their children with stern faces; they never praise their children, always pick at their faults, and are extremely strict with them. I can't say this is wrong, but it easily pushes children to the devil's side. The devil loves to collect those who lack love—it will appear beside them, praise them, provide them with abundant security. With it, even if you punch a hole in the sky, it doesn't matter; it will make you feel it's the one who truly loves you.

Basically, if you want to hear pleasant words, words that don't hurt you, you should go find deceivers—only deceivers can provide you with full emotional value. The words of sages are never pleasant to hear. Laozi said the sage is not benevolent and treats the people as straw dogs. Shakyamuni Buddha said women have five obstacles. Jesus said let him who is without sin cast the first stone. In today's world where individualism runs rampant, we have all been spoiled. We can't bear to hear any truth; any truth makes us feel offended and hurts our fragile hearts. Even TV dramas like "As If in Hell" can make many people feel greatly hurt. What you need to know is that any truth is unpleasant to hear, but unpleasant words are what you should hear. Because only those who love you will risk offending you by saying those truths you don't like to hear. As for those who don't care even if you make a huge mistake—of course they don't care, because you're the one who has to take responsibility, not them. If you ruin your life, what does it matter to them?

In today's world where Western culture sweeps across the globe, traditional East Asian education methods have been severely questioned, and new-generation parents are taught not to be harsh with their children, to use "Western," "civilized" methods to educate children. Hong Kong, as one of the earliest regions to be baptized by British civilization, appears on the surface to perfectly combine the essence of East and West, maintaining the appearance of traditional culture, but many people have actually long abandoned tradition. Traditional culture inheritors like Brother Hello perform traditional rituals in the most traditional way while feeling they've failed their daughters—this is a manifestation of internal Westernization.

Imagine one day when Confucius and Shakyamuni meet Voltaire and Simone de Beauvoir. This is what happens to everyone in the film. Some are followers of Voltaire and Simone de Beauvoir from the start, while others struggle between Confucius, Shakyamuni, and Voltaire. Because of what we have been taught, all our standards for measuring advancement come from Voltaire's legacy. Using Voltaire's cognition and standards, you certainly cannot understand the greatness of Chinese culture. Chinese sages never emphasized material civilization. Western society, on the other hand, has been devoted to material civilization since the Renaissance, and today material civilization has reached unprecedented abundance. Millions of trucks and cargo ships deliver goods around the world daily to satisfy our greed. You can drive to the supermarket and buy a week's worth of food, open your phone to watch people dancing worldwide, and walk into the bathroom to find hot water waiting for you. Most people will like such a life and consider it advanced. Even followers of Shakyamuni won't refuse hot showers and TikTok.

As they say, Confucianism and Buddhism never invented phonographs or chrome film, didn't create shower heads and central air conditioning, didn't write "The Wealth of Nations," didn't invent supermarkets—so what did they do for thousands of years? As far as I know, our ancestors, these great sages, like the Indians, were doing the most important things: studying how to solve our fundamental afflictions, researching the root of all human problems, examining the ultimate questions we must face. Therefore, they were doing what matters most. For us, the most important things are how to solve our suffering, how to transcend life and death, how to attain happiness. There are many less important matters, such as who becomes the U.S. president, how to conquer AIDS, how to make goods circulate quickly, how to train large language models, and how to make toothless people grow new teeth. These are all less important matters. Studying these things not only fails to solve our problems but adds to them. Yet most people become addicted to these unimportant things. They think if planes could fly ten times faster, if we could grow new teeth, we would be happier.

Of course, I never fantasize that the general public could understand these things. Most people can only see the convenience and happiness brought by Voltaire, Simone de Beauvoir, and Adam Smith. They cannot see the price they must pay for these conveniences, nor can they see that these external things will ultimately fail their expectations. Therefore, people like Brother Hello, although still following and even defending tradition, have already been conquered by Simone de Beauvoir in their hearts. I don't mean to blame him—he's just an ordinary person, and in this era, it's almost impossible not to be conquered by the Voltaires. There are few people in this world who can see the problems and ultimate results brought by Western culture; there are even fewer who can understand these things, and fewer still who would support Eastern culture while Western culture dominates the world. After all, that means risking being seen as a spokesperson for backwardness and decay by the whole world. However, regardless, you must know that the theories of Voltaire, John Stuart Mill, and Simone de Beauvoir may bring you temporary happiness and prosperity, but ultimately, it is an endless path of suffering because it is an erroneous theory built upon a non-existent "self."

Written by Lingshan Hermit

January 14, 2025

First published January 20, 2025

Revised January 22, 2025

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灵山居士：当孔子释迦牟尼遇到伏尔泰和西蒙.波娃（修订）

[yeosatinyngz]

Update

You probs all forgot about me but I just wanted to give a quick update as I have been inactive from writing for half a year now. A lot has happened to me within these past few months and I’ve been really busy with work and personal issues. My passion for writing has dwindled down to barely a flickering flame due to how busy I am in my personal life and I just didn’t/don’t have the energy or time to write in my free time. As sad as that sounds I do still wish to write but I just can’t find that motivation or passion in me anymore. I still want to try but with how my work schedule is it’s just looking too overwhelming. I’ll try to open up like maybe only 5 requests soon. I hope y’all are staying safe, healthy and happy. I miss and love you all🫶