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regency-gardens · 3 years

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Tethered Hearts- part 3/3- Benedict Bridgerton

A/N: here it is. thank you to everyone who has joined me during this series, i am beyond grateful and excited to bring you more in the future. I'm not too please with how I ended this part but I couldn't wait to post it. also, if you have any requests please feel free to drop them in my inbox. - Callie

Warnings: angst

word count: 2,823

published: feb. 27. 2021

series masterlist

tags: @tnrthings @tall-tanned-tattoo @thetrashypanda423 @beautypalette

@iammirrorball @yougottalovefandoms @lana-isabelle @bridgertonfan @freyagallileaevans @fckyougeno @sarcasm-n-insomnia @girl-next-door-writes @chazubagi @justfollowtheroad @kennedywxlsh @boredoomfm @s-unflowxr @peachyafshawn @clean-soap

Benedict rode through the night, going over his speech countless times until he was sure he could say it backward. Sleep evaded him despite the carriage being quite comfortable; His nerves and the bumpy dirt roads kept him awake. He eventually forced himself to focus on something other than the disaster of his love life and he took to sketching, as usual.

Drawing within the last few weeks was nearly impossible for him. He could never focus long enough or he was never pleased with the product. his hands never seemed to corporate. This time he tried to draw something that he thought would make him feel happy, at least for the time being. He started to draw two hands intertwined and imagined it was his and y/n, wearing wedding rings. All this did was remind him of how happy he could have been if he hadn't been so selfish.

The Y/L/N country home was a sight to behold. It overlooked a small lake surrounded by trees that provided a home to countless wildlife. The garden was home to a variety of wildflowers and shrubs with lemon trees dotted about. The front of the home was a beautiful work of masonry with climbing vines reaching up the first story and balconies decorated with even more greenery. Stone steps lead down to the lawn where the gardeners worked tirelessly on the upkeep of the statues and fountains in the middle of a circular cobbled walkway. It was a welcoming, lively home, but the sight of it made Benedict's stomach do backflips. She was so close.

The early morning sun was just beginning to peek above the horizon, illuminating the foggy countryside. The birds were chirping and roosters could be heard faintly in the distance welcoming the new day. A long inhale of the fresh morning air seemed to settle benedict’s nerves just a little. He wiped his sweaty palms on his trousers and tried to fix his hair as best he could. It was bad enough he was bothering her so early and unannounced, he could at least look presentable. The tired eye bags would make that difficult.

Meanwhile, in the Y/L/N home, y/n’s maid was just waking up when she heard the faint sound of approaching horses. She peeled back the drawing-room drapes and saw the black Bridgerton carriage quickly approaching.

“Oh my! Miss y/n!”

She ran down the hall and up the stairs as fast as her legs could carry her. She burst through y/n’s bedroom doors, panting. Yn, having been startled awake, sat up confused. Benedict's letters were still scattered around the bed.

“What on earth? Marta, what’s happened?”

“He’s here! Mr. Bridgerton is here!” y/n’s throat went dry and she immediately sprang from the bed and rushed to the window just in time to see the carriage door come to a stop at the steps. Without a second thought, she ran as fast as she could downstairs, not even taking the time to put on shoes.

Benedict took a deep breath before reaching for the handle of the carriage. With a final rush of courage, he hopped out. At the same time, y/n appeared through the front doors and stopped at the top of the steps. She was looking down at him and suddenly he forgot everything he wanted to say. She was ethereal. The sight of Her long white nightgown and wild hair was something he had never seen before and he couldn’t get enough.

There was a silence as they waited for each other to say something. When it became clear she wasn’t going to say anything, Benedict cleared his throat.

“I'm sorry to have bothered you so early in the morning. It couldn’t wait.”

Her expression was unreadable and it further worsened his nerves.

“I realize you probably don’t want to speak with me ever again. Your ignoring of my letters made that clear enough but I couldn’t give up just yet and I think Eloise would have my head if I didn’t try one last time-”

“I wasn’t ignoring your letters.”

He paused, surprised.

“Until last night I didn’t know they even existed. My father hid them thinking they’d do more harm than good. I stayed up half the night reading them.” Her voice was soft and shaky. He clung to every word.

“Then you know. You know why I'm here. You…” he sighed in exasperation, his throat began to ache from holding back the tears he’d been fighting for so long. His voice was cracking and shaky but he couldn’t stop the words flowing from his heart.

“You are the blood in my veins and the breath in my lungs; you are my reason for living, for waking up every damn day. I hurt you so badly and I hate myself for it. I will always hate myself for it. I had the most wonderful woman in the world by my side and I threw it away. I am a weak man. I am weak but you make me strong and I am not ashamed to say that I need you. I need you, I need you, I need you and I will never not need you and I will never stop loving you. You owe me nothing. I know that. You have no reason to ever trust me again. I know that. But I’ll be damned if I don’t try-if I don’t get on my knees and beg you for one more chance. I don’t deserve it. you could turn around and leave me forever and I would not blame you. But right here, right now, I need to know- I am begging to know if there is any possible way that you still love me because I cannot spend another moment wondering. So please, my darling, my love, my life… is there any chance that you still love me too?”

They were both crying, thoughts running around their heads at the speed of light. Three weeks’ worth of torture was bubbling to the surface, emotions boiling over the edge. Benedict, during his speech, had taken a few daring steps towards her and now stood at her feet, peering up into her glossy eyes. Slowly, hesitantly, y/n’s warm hand cupped his cheek, and just like that night so long ago, he leaned into its warmth. This was the first he’d ever touched her soft hands and it sent chills down his spine. His own hand reached to hold hers, keeping it from moving. She wiped away his tears with her thumb.

“ I am so ...so sorry.” His words were a mere whisper.

She was at war with herself. Trusting him again could lead to complete heartbreak once again, but could also lead to some of the happiest days of her life. Maybe a fresh start was what they needed- a second chance.

This. this was the benedict she knew. This benedict was hers. Oh, how she missed him.

“My benedict…” his heart soared at the sound of his name on her lips,”

It would seem that I have the grave misfortune of having my heart tethered to yours. No matter how far you throw me, I'll always come back to you. It scares me.”

He frowns the pit in his stomach growing with his anticipation.

“I have half a mind to throw you out right now. You’re lucky I don't break your nose.” he gulped, scared she may follow through.

“I know. Honestly, I'm surprised you haven't killed me yet,” he admitted. She bit her cheek to stop herself from smiling.

“I'm still making up my mind.” he stifles a laugh.

“Benedict Bridgerton you better get ready to suck up to me for the rest of your life because I will never let you live this down. I'll forgive but I will never forget.”

The air leaves his lungs in a breath he didn't know he was holding and he frantically scans her face for any sign of sarcasm or lying. But she wasn't. She gave him a small, shy smile as she watched the realization wash over him and he let out a relieved, joyous laugh. She shrieks when he grabs her by the waist and spins her around in celebration. He basks in the sweet relief of being in her embrace.

When she lands on her feet again, he pulls her into his chest, peppering her tear-stained face with grateful kisses.

“I love you, I love you, I love you. I am so sorry, my darling.” she sighs and places her hands on his chest.

“You’re lucky I love you so much. But know this,” she points a threatening finger at him, “ if you ever step so much as a toe out of line, you won't even get the chance to apologize because I will kill you.” she glared at him and he nodded, fearfully.

“I-i believe you.” and he did. She smiled in satisfaction.

“Also, I have a few demands.”

“Name it, and it's yours. I’d give you the world if I could.”

“I want two dances at every ball we attend, and you cannot complain. I would also like to see what you’re drawing when you aren't desperately trying to win me back.” He sighed, smiled, and shook his head.

“I think I could manage that.” He started to lean in for a kiss but she placed a finger to his lips.

“One more thing.”

“Yes?”

“I want a puppy.” He throws his head back in laughter.

“You may have as many puppies as you want, Darling. But may I state my own demands?” she quirks an eyebrow at him.

“You have demands?”

“Only one. And I think- I hope- you won’t find it too unreasonable.”

She furrowed her eyebrows and wondered what on earth he was trying to pull.

“I’m listening…”

He releases her from his embrace and steps back. Her eyes widen as he gets down on one knee and takes her hand in his.

“Do me the honor of becoming my wife. Will you marry me, y/n y/l/n.”

y/n, breathless, covers her mouth with her free hand in shock. Benedict looks at her nervously. But then she nods her head.

“yes..yes, yes, yes!” He doesn’t waste a moment before once again taking her in his arms and finally pressing his lips to hers, feeling like he was walking on clouds. Nothing could bring him down.

Unbeknownst to the couple, the entire staff and the y/l/n siblings are all watching from the drawing-room windows, cheering and clapping. Though, Henry was seriously considering taking a mallet to Benedict’s head.

“There's only one problem,” y/n says once they've pulled away. “My father is probably going to kill you.” okay, maybe one thing could bring him down.

Once they’ve both returned to London, Benedict finds that lord Y/L/N does indeed want to kill benedict. It took two Bridgerton brothers and Henry to hold him back after chasing Benedict around the garden for the last ten minutes. But finally, after two hours of separation, some mediating through Anthony and Henry, and many, many glasses of brandy- her father decided to hear her out.

It took a lot of explaining and convincing. He had a hard time wrapping his mind around the fact that y/n forgave benedict after such a heinous betrayal. But she explained her love for him. she told him to think about his own love for her mother and ask himself what he would do. If he thought his wife would have forgiven him.

“Probably not, stubborn woman.”

“Papa!” y/n laughed. He chuckled.

“I guess I can see where you're coming from. Besides, I could never say no to you.” she smiled as he placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. He pointed at her, “ this doesn't mean I like him, though.”

“I know, papa. I know.”

y/n met the Bridgertons back in the library where benedict was pacing back and forth, nervously chewing on his thumb nail. When the door opened, he stopped in his place and looked at her, praying for good news. When she smiled and nodded, he sighed in relief, running to embrace her. The brothers and Henry smiled at each other, happy to finally see their siblings back together and happy at last.

The wedding was held a month later. Similar to Daphne and Simon's wedding, it was small- keeping the guestlist for the ceremony exclusive to family.

Benedict stood at the altar, facing away from the doors, wringing his hands together anxiously. Anthony leaned over and nudged him.

“Alright, benny?” Benedict smiled and nodded.

“More than alright.” Anthony grinned and patted his shoulder supportively.

“You’re a lucky man.”

“Don't I know it.”

Meanwhile, just behind the chapel doors, y/n was fiddling with the lace of her dress while her maid adjusted the bouquet of pink roses. Her father sighed.

“It's not too late you know, we could always escape out the back.” y/n playfully hit her father’s shoulder.

“Papa, I know he has done plenty of wrongs but I love him. Also, I promise to make his life hell if he ever steps out of line.” she winks and he chuckles.

“That’s my girl.”

Suddenly they hear the choir begin to sing and y/n’s maid quickly places the bouquet in her hands. The doors open and her father begins to lead her down the aisle.

The reception wasn't flashy but it was one hell of a party. By the end of the night, London's most prestigious mamas were leaning on their husband’s shoulders after indulging in one too many glasses of champagne and lord Y/L/N was drunk enough to shake hands with benedict. So overall, a great success.

In the carriage ride to their new home just outside of London, y/n had fallen asleep against her husband’s shoulder. He couldn't take his eyes off her and he gently stroked her hair, careful not to wake her from her nap.

Luckily, she woke just before they arrived, excited to see her new home. She basically pulled Benedict out of the carriage, bursting with the energy of someone who hasn't just woken from a half-hour nap. When they got to the doorstep he scooped her up into his arms and pressed a sweet kiss to her lips.

“Close your eyes.”

“Why?” she giggled.

“Just do it. I have a surprise for you.” she giggled some more and covered her eyes with her hands, not so sneakily peeking through her fingers. When benedict stared down at her with a scolding look she quickly closed them again.

She hears the doors open and benedict walking into the foyer. He gently sets her down on her feet and grabs hold of her hands, making sure they don’t move.

“Can I look now?” she whined impatiently. He chuckles, the vibrations of his chest on her back sending chills down her spine.

“Not yet, not yet… okay...now.” he slowly pulls her hands down and she opens her eyes to see their new staff all standing in front of them. In the middle is y/n’s maid holding a plush pillow with a small spotted puppy, snoozing away on the velvet.

“Oh my goodness!”

She immediately rushes forward to see it. The puppy begins to stir, letting out a big yawn and sniffing her hand. He gives it a few kisses and she's immediately in love. “Oh, good morning, darling!” she coos, slowly picking up the sleepy boy.

“You said you wanted a puppy, so here he is. He's a dalmatian.” Benedict smiles, greatly enjoying watching his wife fawn over the little creature.

“He's perfect! Does he have a name?”

“Not yet, I thought I would let you decide.”

“Wise decision, indeed,” she joked, “ I think I'll name him Romeo, because of the little heart spot on his nose. That way, if we ever get another, we can name her Juliet!” benedict smiled, petting the puppy’s head as it began to fall back asleep in her arms.

“That sounds like a wonderful idea.”

y/n’s maid then came over to take the puppy so they could settle in and get ready for bed. She begrudgingly handed over her new best friend after being promised that she’ll get to spend all day with him the next day. Benedict was, admittedly, a little jealous. He wraps his arms around her waist, leaning down to whisper in her ear.

“If I had known I would have to share you on our honeymoon, I would have held off a few weeks.” she giggles as he plants kisses on her neck and cheek, playfully shoving him away. He twirls her around so she is facing him and she wraps her arms around his neck, diving in for a heated kiss.

“Don't worry, my love. We have all night to ourselves. Just you and me.” she reassured him, twirling a stray curl on his forehead. He grins widely.

“And then forever.” she leans her forehead against his, basking in the moment.

“And then, forever.”

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ALTERNATE ENDING

#bridgerton #bridgerton imagine #benedict bridgerton #benedict bridgerton imagine #benedict bridgerton x reader #anthony bridgerton #anthony x reader #anthony bridgerton x reader #bridgerton fanfic #bridgerton fanfiction #benedict x reader #Benedict bridgerton x fem!reader

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ignis-scientia-estrogen-brigade · 5 years

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~ISEB in Japan: A Photo Journal~

If you’ve been following me on Twitter lately, you’ll know that I’ve been traveling through parts of Japan the last couple of weeks with my Ignis Play Arts Kai figure in tow. I posted a few pictures over there during the duration of my trip, but those barely scratched the surface of everything I got to do while in Japan. So I thought I’d put together a blog post of my journey while it was still fresh in my mind, featuring everyone’s favorite strategist in what I’ve been dubbing my Great Final Fantasy XV Adventure of 2019!

[Image-heavy content + commentary under the cut]

A brief backstory: I’ve wanted to go to Japan my entire adult life. For years, I’ve watched friends make the trek while I’ve been stuck at home with a severe case of FOMO. The only thing that ever stopped me from going was money (or a lack thereof), so I made the decision last summer to buckle down and sock away every dime I made to make it happen. My only concern before hopping on the plane was that I had missed the wave of FFXV popularity by about a year, but I would quickly learn that—other than not getting to eat any of Ignis’ recipes at the Square Enix Cafe—I had little to worry about.

Literally the only reason I brought my Play Arts Kai figure was so I could take this picture of Ignis at the Citadel (a.k.a. the Tokyo Metropolitan Government Building), which was the very first place I stopped at on my first full day in Tokyo. The building + the surrounding plaza, while not 100% accurate, is a fairly impressive facsimile of the one in the game. It’s located in Shinjuku, which also boasts a lot of similarities to Insomnia. Having finished Episode Ardyn mere hours before jetting off on my trip, it felt like I had stepped off the plane and right into the game!

There just so happened to be an Animate right near the Tokyo Metropolitan Government Building, so I popped in to get a feel for what kind of FFXV merch I’d be able to find two years after the game’s release and a year after its height of popularity. Turns out, there was quite a lot of swag to be found! Truth be told, I’ve never been one to chase down official merchandise (unfortunately my job doesn’t really afford that luxury), but I gave myself special permission while on vacation to buy anything I wanted. So I did! Including everything you see above. ^^;;

The next thing I did was take the train to Ginza to meet Lyle/@landscape-gonna (@landscape_gonna on Twitter), and I simply cannot say enough nice things about her. If you don’t know who she is, there’s a 99.9% chance you’ve seen at least one of her Ignis costumes, and they are A. M. A. Z. I. N. G. We had chatted a bit previously on Twitter before I went full-on stan mode, asking her if she'd be willing to meet up with me (a total stranger) to have lunch and talk Ignis and Final Fantasy. Not only did she say yes, but she gifted me with copies of her incredible cosplay zines and was not the least embarrassed when I busted out my Play Kai Arts figure in the middle of a busy Japanese dessert restaurant haha.

See? Zero embarrassment here.

We even did Noct’s ultimate pose! In public!

I can’t begin to articulate how special meeting Lyle was for me—being brought together from opposite sides of the world to share in our love for Ignis/FFXV is a memory I will cherish my entire life. So Lyle, if you are reading this: どうもありがとうございます ! ٩( ᐛ )( ᐖ )۶

Lyle wasn't the only friend I had in Japan. Another friend of mine, Asuka (who happens to be well-versed in anime/video game culture), volunteered to be my guide through Ikebukuro/Otome Road the next day. Quick otaku lesson: Kbooks is a chain of stores that specializes in the resale of licensed merchandise. For example, if you missed out on some of the limited availability items from the Movic and the Square Enix Cafe collaborations, you might be able to find them at a Kbooks. Otome Road in particular has something like seven different Kbook shops in a 3-block radius, each one specializing in different products (sports anime, idols, cosplay, etc). I, of course, beelined for the video game shop...

...which is where I found this fucking thing:

I’m not gonna lie, I almost bought it. I just didn’t know what I would do with it besides scare the living daylights out of people when they least expected it lol.

Yoooo Adam I found ya boi in Ikebukuro

We popped into the cosplay Kbooks shop since it was right across the street and I found an Ignis costume for sale! Please enjoy this picture of me pretending to come up with a new recipeh (since this is likely the closest I’ll ever come to cosplaying as Ignis).

One of the things Asuka introduced me to was Hanami (picnic under the cherry blossoms, basically). I had timed my trip to coincide with the blooming of the sakura, and the experience of being in Japan during that time was indescribable. I took a bajillion pictures of the sakura while I was there and unfortunately none of my photos ever quite captured the beauty and magic of them in person, but here’s a lil’ pic of a tree in bloom at Yoyogi Park (with the Movic Ignis charm I bought at Kbooks earlier that day).

Another item on my Japan checklist was to stay at a ryokan (traditional Japanese inn) in Hakone, a town famous for its onsen/hot springs. Nothing in Hakone is cheap (at least, not during peak sakura season), and I had spent an absurd amount of money on a night at one particular ryokan with a private bath (shy husband haha). The private bath could only be reserved in 30-minute increments, and by the time we finally rolled into Hakone the bath we wanted only had one slot available for the rest of the night. So what did I do?

If you said, “Waste the first 15 minutes of your 30-minute, super-expensive onsen experience taking the perfect Ignis-in-a-hot-springs photo” then you would be absolutely correct lol.

I actually wasn’t planning on taking a bunch of photos of my Ignis figure on this trip, but after my husband tucked Ignis into my futon while I was in the bathroom, documenting my trip vicariously through Ignis ended up taking on a life of its own. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I popped back over to Tokyo after my stay in Hakone, which is when I finally got to make the Great Nerd Pilgrimage™ to the Square Enix Cafe! Had the FFXV collab been going on while I was there, I might’ve forked over the cash to eat at the cafe, but I opted to skip out on lunch so I could spend more money in their shop. They still had a small collection of FFXV merch...

...including this acrylic Ignis stand that I wanted but thought I would never own after failing to find it at Kbooks earlier in the week. Huzzah!

Also, I just feel the need to let everyone know that this is what the outside of the Square Enix Cafe in Tokyo looks like lmao.

Our next stop was Kyoto, which we arrived in on Gladio’s birthday (April 2nd). Unfortunately I didn’t have time to draw anything for his b-day, but we did stop for a Nissin Cup Noodle in honor of Gladio!

One of the most memorable moments of my trip was when this boating incident happened, and it requires a little bit of backstory. On my first full day in Kyoto, I attempted to field two of the most popular tourist destinations in Kyoto: the bamboo forest in Arashiyama, and the Fushimi Inari Shrine. Both places have their beauty and historical significance, and I suspect during the off-season are inspiring sites to behold. In my case, both places were absolutely swarming with tourists, which really put a damper on my enjoyment of them. Defeated, I followed a local canal back toward my hotel, which is where I spotted a miniature boat enthusiast controlling a boat that looked eerily similar to the Royal Vessel. I pulled my Ignis figure out with the intention of simply taking a photo of the boat in the background; when the man saw me holding my figure and fumbling with my phone, he flagged me over and gestured for me to put Ignis in the boat. I wish I had documented how it all went down a little better, but as I was literally wheezing with laughter, the above was the best I could capture.

One of the more off-the-cuff decision I made was to dress in kimono for a day while in Gion (Kyoto). As the cherry blossoms were at their height during my stay there, you couldn’t sneeze without hitting someone who was dressed traditionally for the numerous festivals that were taking place throughout the city. As a white foreigner, I initially had reservations about wearing a kimono (for fear of cultural appropriation), but I did everything I could to be as respectful and reverent whilst wearing the garb (and the rental shop was certainly happy for the patronage). It was an amazing experience and I would definitely do it again!

Speaking of being respectful, I made it a point not to take pictures of Ignis while visiting any shrines (because nothing screams ‘douchey American’ quite like whipping out an action figure on sacred grounds), hence why I don’t have pictures of any of the major shrines we visited in this post. I did, however, spot this miniature shrine arch in an alleyway, and thought it would be okay for my equally miniature strategist to pay his respects.

Literally, a tiny shrine in an alleyway. I suppose even alleys have their deities!

Osaka is about 20 minutes away from Kyoto by train, and since I had already traveled all the way out to Kyoto, I went the extra few miles to stop by the Square Enix Cafe in Osaka. They actually had a smaller selection of FFXV merch than the one in Tokyo and I didn’t end up buying anything, but I would’ve never stopped wondering if I had missed out on something if I hadn’t gone and seen it for myself!

My last day in Kyoto was a week into my trip, and I still had five days left to go. After walking ~10 miles every day (no joke, I have the GPS screenshots to prove it!), I was really starting to feel the grind. I’m sure Ignis was also desperate for an Ebony after being lugged around in the bottom of my purse for a week lol.

Back on the Shinkansen (bullet train) to Tokyo!

Weeeeeee (ﾉ^ヮ^)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧

Said hi to Fuji-san!

Stopped for a delicious matcha parfait! (Shout-out to my husband who never once got annoyed with me whenever I busted out my figure in public spaces lol)

This was without a doubt the craziest and most unexpected find of any of my merch runs. I had gone to the video game Kbooks in Ikebukuro earlier in the week and had sifted through all their Ignis merch with a fine-toothed comb. This particular Movic charm was one I had been on the lookout for, but it was a rare pull even when they were readily available a year ago, and the only Ignis charm I came across in my first trip to Kbooks was the normal Ignis one (see my Hanami pic). I had no real reason to return to Ikebukuro after I got back from Kyoto, but on a whim I went one last time and BAM—this guy was hanging out there in his lil’ baggie, just waiting for me to get my grubby little hands on him. Jackpot!

All in all, I spent way too much money and I couldn’t be happier for it. The only thing I couldn’t find for the life of me was the Ignis cologne by Movic, but after searching through several Animates and Kbooks, I began to suspect it might be an online-exclusive item that wasn’t available in stores. (Which was probably a good thing for me cause I was already stretching my budget to the limit by this point haha.)

On my last night in Japan, I went back to the Tokyo Metropolitan Government Building—only this time I went at night when it was all lit up! I also went up to the observation deck on the 45th floor (something I didn’t know you could do the first time I was there) and enjoyed a fantastic view of nighttime Insomnia Tokyo. It was the perfect bookend to a perfect trip, and my heart is absolutely overflowing right now with love for both Japan and Final Fantasy XV!

#final fantasy xv #ignis scientia #ffxv

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tortuefleur · 7 years

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Hallowed Whispers

Refined stream of conscious based on a dream about transformation.

I heard the call, a whispering inclination to roam and seek.

“Come and see”, it echoed in the exhausted corridors of my mind..

Truthfully it may have been some alchemical process of restlessness and insomnia. But the insistence of it, perhaps that was the truth of it. The ache it elicited in me felt quite real. I sought out the source of it, perambulation without goal, a wandering listlessness roaming the halls of the building.

Like some hallowed hall, flimsy plastic tapestries festooned the site. I wondered if I ought to question the lack of a busy populace. No sentry nor construction drone could be seen throughout my jaunt. But somehow I was not surprised. I passed ragged holes in the walls, admiring the sight of a naked horizon framed by exposed re-bar.

The electrical whine of the building felt as though it were being overtaken by a warm humming, like some massive lung live wired to the building’s electrical grid. The chill I noted upon entry to the floor was also ebbing away. I found myself walking through the broken cubicles and smashed meeting rooms. Picking my way over crumbled forms of chairs and computers, everything covered with a layer of plaster dust and paint chips.

Wires hung from the ceiling, hemorrhaging through sections of tile and hanging loose over head.

I wandered through the twisting guts of the offices until I came upon purple roots tethered into the walls and floor. Vascular, fleshy roots that clung to walls, plasterboard walls crumbling in their slow, questing grip. I began to see growths among the roots in tucked away corners, large bulbous growths of smooth semi translucent membrane. Inside the fibrous interior vague human shapes could be seen in reclining posture. Many in a fetal array, none appearing to be writhing or howling, all in a state like sleep. Each as though they had come home, as natural as petals to their flower. Some were empty as well, their contents waiting for their appointed charges. But none of them were mine.

I kept walking, aware that now there was movement in the walls, under the floor, at the corner of my eyes. Much of it was quivering motion in the roots and chambers of the alien… vegetation? Perhaps? But I knew there eyes upon me, though distance was kept.

When I found the chamber meant for me, I knew it sounding in my heart, in the aching feeling from ancient corridors of my cortex down the lines of my spine. It was sprawled over a shattered meeting hall, bulk rooted on the staging area at the epicenter. Perhaps they knew the room’s importance, or at least, appreciated the historical gravity of the amphitheatre like architecture.

I felt through the wavering, humid air that surrounded it. I swore it respirated, it breathed out a living air that clung to the skin. My fingertips found its surface and sunk into it as though it was kneaded dough. The sensation was pleasantly warm throughout, it did not pull me in, it simply yearned with a palpable desperation. It had waited for me, it waited still, its patience was glacial and just as immense in sheer potential.

The interior of the membrane was not dark, instead I was bathed in outrageous colour. Simplistic hues of pink, yellow and blue splashed and ebbed across my vision. I could look down at myself in the din of colour but the body I saw pained me. Alien in its awkward shape, its quotidian faults. It was distorted by the interstitial fluid, a substance I breathed easily if not eagerly.

Warmth spread through my lungs.

The first I felt of the change was a piercing strike to my forehead as though by a knife, or I imagined, perhaps an arrow. The shaft of which had sunk deep within what would be insensate grey matter. It was not a pressure, it was a release. My skull held an infection and pustulent humanity flowed from the wound. The heat at my brow was a tongue of fire and my body spoke the profound language of change.

Appendages twisted, new bones anchored to unwoven sinew, limbs I had never known but desperately desired took shape. Heedless to time, I gestated in that alien womb for a endlessly productive length of time. My eyes itched, and a shuddering touch popped the flimsy bulbs. A momentary bother, the widened cavities soon became filled with the vitreous humors that would behold the new world I would be born into.

When I emerged from metamorphosis, plasmic beauty dripped from a body hewn in glory. Membranes of my wings spread wide, drying in kaleidoscopic sunlight. I stretched a multitude of new limbs at the sky, now filled with the colour I could never have beheld with my once obsolete flesh.

I flexed the xeno-musculature of my extended abdomen, what was new only had a pale memory of what had been. Song reached my rigid antennae, a conversation I could partake in, a multitude of others waking from their own rejuvenating sleep. I would meet them, nobility among the noble.

#TF #transformation #dream #writing #light gore #super light #barely any at all really #My prose is purple #That's how I roll

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7deadlycinderellas · 7 years

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The New Earth, ch 4

Ao3 link

Clarke was so enthralled that she barely noticed when Lexa took the bubble from her, swirling it in a twist through her own hands.

“Might not want to do that while we’re down here”.

Clarke stares at the other girl, mouth agape.

“So, you’re really…”

Lexa laughs softly.

“You can say ‘the avatar’. It’s not like it means anything anymore”.

Clarke is momentarily too shocked to speak.

“What- how can you say it doesn’t mean anything? You’re supposed to bring balance to the world, to protect it.”

Lexa shakes her head again.

“I protect my people...and as for balance, I don’t think the world knows the meaning of the word.”

“But there must be something….”

“I think you’ll see the truth when you see what’s become of the Earth. My people follow me, but they certainly don’t worry too much if I leave. I may be the latest in a chain, but the chain is just another broken piece of the machine.”

She begins to walk faster, disappearing into the middle of the group.

Clarke slowly slips between Raven and Wells, who were close enough to hear the two’s conversation.

“Congrats” Raven says, nudging her with her elbow, “First new waterbender among us”.

Well Clarke stays quiet, Wells asks,

“You OK?”

“It’s just, the stuff Lexa said about the way the Earth is now bothered me.”

“Well if she was actually born into the Earth Kingdom, then she’s the fourth Avatar in a hundred years.”

“What?” Both Clarke and Raven are confused.

“Korra was a waterbender. The cycle is Water, Earth, Fire, Air. She’s no where near old enough to have been the very next one. “

“Maybe she’s not Earth Kingdom then” Raven says, “There’s all kinds of benders in the group, she could be from anywhere”.

Wells shrugs.

“Kyoshi lived to 300. Something tells me the life expectancy of an Avatar isn’t that long now. I can understand if that’s why she doesn’t think too much of her role.”

The conversation is interrupted by the bubble reaching the edge of the bay and all of them climbing back up the edges of the sea floor.

The area around the bay is desolate, no trees, no vegetation of any kind. They barely travel a few hundred feet, when the waterbender in front (one of the other adults had called him Lincoln) falls to the ground as if he had hit a wall.

“It’s the sandstorm!” one of the others yells. “We’ll have to go around it”.

The storm is at least thirty feet high and ends as sharply as a cliff. It’s fairly easy to avoid, but they can’t see how far it stretches.

“Can’t any of the benders control the storm?” Kane asks as they continue.

“Sand bending is a specialized art, it’s only masters once lived in the Si Wong desert. If they have perished, so has it.”

“Besides,” Lexa interjects. “This storm isn’t made by humans. It’s powered by the spirits within”.

“Speaking of” the long haired kid Clarke had spoken to yesterday pipes up, she thinks his name is Jasper. “Why haven’t we seen any of the spirits? The story we heard was that they had basically burst forth and taken over”.

“The parts of the forest they reside in, we avoid. It seems to work for both sides. Trust us, if you had come upon them, you definitely would have known,” Indra assures them.

Clarke stares through the undulating, half transparent blur that the is the storm. She can almost see movement within it, small dark figures of all sizes. The wind that comes off of it is warm, warmer than the rest of the ground.

The thin bayside turns to thin forest again. Soon past this point, the storm abruptly stops. The group turns, and they first see the remains of the Outer Ring of Ba Sing Se.

The once impenetrable wall is now a ring of rubble.

It’s truly a sight to behold.

“Can we at least make it through here?” Kane asks.

Indra nods sagely, and Lexa and the other Earthbenders step forth, and begin to try and clear a path. Wells steps forward, and makes some weak attempt to assist.

“I should take this time to ask you”, Indra says to Kane when they stand back and let the others work. “What are you hoping to find here?”

“There is equipment somewhere in Ba Sing Se we can use to connect to the Ark and give them our position. We’ve been able to ping it for years, but it’s never given us any kind of response, making us think it’s likely abandoned. But if we can find it, we can use it to give the OK for the rest of our people to try and get down to Earth.”.

“It’s all we have to let them know we’re alive”. Raven adds quietly. Clarke remembers she mentioned a boyfriend back in space. She’s only been able to continue by squashing down thoughts of her mom. Everyone down here has family and friends…

“We’re through” Lexa’s voice breaks through the conversation.

The make their way through the opening single file.

The wall opens up into what was once the Agrarian zone. Now, it’s completely empty.

Wells kicks the ground restlessly. It’s vaguely disappointing. True, they knew the world had been devastated but it’s still so strange. This whole area once supplied all of the city’s agriculture, all their crops and livestock were raised here, many of their products for trade. Now there’s no sign of anything, human, animal or spirit.

Without any kind of obstacles, the journey towards the Inner Ring is uneventful. Monty points out at one point they can see the track where the train used to run to enter the city. Unpowered for a century by earthbending, it sits baking in the sun. The only landmark in the sea of barren earth.

They reach the Inner Ring by sunset. It’s not as demolished as the Outer Ring, but it’s still rundown.

“This will take much longer to get through,” Lexa says, touching one hand to the wall.

“We should camp for the night, save up our strength,” Indra says decisively. Kane agrees.

There are no trees for the others to camp in tonight, so the two groups pool their supplies and make do. It’s not cold, it occurs to Clarke that they must have landed in summer.

She tosses and turns again that night. This insomnia is going to be a problem on Earth, she can already feel it. She’s not sure if it’s the open space, or the feel of the air, or what.

She sits up, grabs her canteen and moves out from under the tents. She opens the canteen, and with great concentration, manages to lift several bubbles of water from it.

“Not bad for a beginner”.

Clarke jumps, before turning to where Lexa is also sitting awake.

“You can’t sleep either?”

Lexa shakes her head.

“I don’t like sleeping on the ground. I keep thinking someone’s going to sneak up on me.”

“Is that something that happens much on Earth?”

She doesn’t respond. Clarke studies her. She still looks to be about Bellamy’s age, but seeing all of her, she seems older. Her skin is sun weathered, her eyes tired.

“I can teach you a little” she continues, out of nowhere.

Clarke’s eyes shoot open.

“Are you serious?”

Lexa nods.

“I learned earth first, then water. I don’t know too much about air or fire, most of our group are water or earth benders.”

“Have you learned from true masters at all?”

Lexa shakes her head.

“I’m not sure if any of them even survived. The air nation was small enough when…”

She trails off.

“But I know a little, of everything. “

“Don’t you want to though?” Lexa eyes meet hers, and suddenly Clarke’s cheeks burn.

“I mean, I do want you to teach me, whatever you know. But don’t you want to find masters of the elements? If you have the ability, don’t you want to learn all you can?”

Lexa laughs softly.

“I guess I do. Honestly? Before you all fell from the sky, I wasn’t sure I would ever get to leave the forest.”

She scoots on the ground, and reaches her hand out above Clarke’s canteen.

“Here, let me show you.”

#the 100 #clexa #avatar crossover #fic

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theroguebadger · 7 years

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Review: Final Fantasy XV

That’s it! I’ve come up with a new review! (No spoilers)

Following a game's development from the day of its initial announcement can be a difficult prospect. For many AAA games, that can mean two or three years of patience, with only a new trailer every few months to keep the fire of anticipation burning. In this sense, Final Fantasy XV is the most extreme of anomalies. It was first unveiled as Final Fantasy Versus XIII, a companion story with loose links to Final Fantasy XIII, at E3 in 2006, a whopping ten years before it would finally see the light of day. In the following years, updates and new information were so scarce that many feared that the game would never see release; even when it was officially rebranded as Final Fantasy XV at E3 2013, seven years after its first trailer aired, fans were subjected to a three-year wait before they could get their hands on it, though two demos and several trailers filled the gap. With a game like this, whose development history was so troubled and uncertain, it isn't enough to simply ask whether or not the finished product is a satisfactory one. Perhaps more importantly, we have to ask: was it worth the wait?

Final Fantasy XV picks and chooses aspects from earlier series instalments and takes them for itself, whilst occasionally throwing something new into the mix. Reminiscent of Final Fantasy III and X-2, your party is limited to a smaller group of people – four, in this case – all of which are present from the opening stages of the story. Noctis Lucis Caelum, prince of the kingdom of Lucis, departs the capital city of Insomnia in the opening scenes, accompanied by three close friends: Ignis, a sensible caretaker charged with keeping Noctis out of trouble; Gladiolus, a combat instructor responsible for training Noctis's combat skills; and Prompto, a close friend of the prince's from his school days, who brings a carefree enthusiasm and his photography skills to the team.

Together, they set off on a road trip to attend Noctis's own wedding to Lunafreya, princess of distant kingdom Tenebrae. It all quickly goes wrong, of course. Insomnia is invaded by an imperial army moments after you leave; your father the king is assassinated, your fiancée disappears on a journey of her own and the kingdom's Crystal, a magical relic needed to keep the world safe, is pilfered by the empire. As with much of the story, this is all communicated in a very rushed, head-scratching sort of way. The impact of events is made underwhelming by how little time or focus is dedicated to them. The invasion of Insomnia is shown to be a battle on a catastrophic scale, but the seconds-long cutscene that reveals it hardly adds anything to the immensity of the event.

With their mission now changed – they need to find Lunafreya, bring down the empire and restore the Crystal to Lucis – Noctis and company's true journey begins. Here the first portion of Lucis's open world becomes available to you, with the other sections locked behind early story progression. When you're not travelling between story areas – your means of transport being the Regalia, on foot or, eventually, via chocobo – you can tackle some of FF15's innumerable hunting missions, help out troubled NPCs at the various outposts or gather useful materials. Food sources will provide you with ingredients to bolster Ignis's list of recipes, which when prepared at camp will give the party a time-limited boost to various stats. In many cases, the right meal can make all the difference in a tough fight, of which there are many outside of the mandatory story fights, and Ignis's own enthusiasm for the culinary arts makes the whole process quite charming to watch.

Alongside ingredients, you can also discover ore with which to customise your car, or sources of magic to craft spells for use in battle. Gone are the days of scrolling through your acquired spells to find the right one for the occasion. Final Fantasy XV has its own approach to magic, allowing you to mix and match your stock of each element to create stronger variants – the classic -aras and -agas – but the most crucial aspect is adding in items you've collected along your travels. These can do anything from increasing the uses of a particular spell (they're all finite and must be replenished) to adding extra effects such as healing Noctis or boosting the experience you earn from any battle in which they're cast. Fiddling around with different combinations is interesting enough at first, but after a while I couldn't help but wish they'd stuck with something more traditional. Having these usage-limited tools of devastation is a novel concept, but friendly fire means you're just as likely to set your team ablaze as you are to turn the tide of battle with a well-placed, triple-cast Firaga.

Combat puts you solely in control of Noctis, with your allies only controllable through the activation of their own specific skills. Whilst your teammates are limited to two weapons of specific types – Gladiolus uses greatswords and shields, for example – Noctis can wield anything and everything, including the Royal Arms of the Lucis line. His unique, princely abilities allow him to teleport around the battlefield, instantly warping to a distant enemy and landing a fearsome blow that only grows stronger the further he warps. In bigger, more chaotic battles, the combat truly shines; at times, it feels as if Noctis's friends only fight with him to better enable his showy fighting style, and it works. Incapacitating a group of enemies with well-timed warp-strikes before following up with a combo attack – Gladiolus is capable of massive damage, whereas Ignis provides support and Prompto destabilises and hinders the enemy – is never unsatisfying.

The combat system only begins to exhibit major faults when you face off against certain screen-filling enemies, so large in size and scale that the camera doesn't know what to do or where to look. The hit-detection on these enemies is similarly inconsistent, meaning what you intended to be a critical blow with a warp-strike actually results in you sliding along the enemy's bulk before clipping through them and becoming lodged inside. These encounters are limited, however, and for the most part the fast-paced battles continue to be one of Final Fantasy XV's triumphs. It's a system where simplicity proves to be the a viable approach, though fans of Final Fantasy's turn-based roots might yearn for something more traditional. Summoning, a recurring feature of Final Fantasy combat, has also been overhauled – don't expect a designated summoner class in this game. The small but familiar selection of summons are a real spectacle to behold, towering high above the battlefield as they unleash a devastating ability. With their acquisition tied to story progression, however, there's no satisfaction or challenge in acquiring them, and their specific summon requirements – they're more likely to appear based on factors such as allies being knocked out or Noctis entering the danger state – make them awkward and fiddly at times, resulting in a mountain-sized, god-like creature appearing to end a battle against low-level enemies, or at the very end of a lengthy boss battle where their intervention would have been better appreciated early on.

Where Final Fantasy XV truly struggles is in telling its story. Its more recent predecessors had particular narrative issues – FF13's reliance on handing the player files to read in order to properly learn about the world, for instance – but never before have I felt that a Final Fantasy game's story is in dire need of fixing – until now. The problems start early and rarely abate, with one of FF15's rare, albeit beautiful, CGI cutscenes showing the king's death in mere seconds. The actual invasion of Insomnia, home to all four party members, is detailed mostly via radio transmissions heard by the group. After a little bit of moping, Noctis seemingly forgets his father has died at all; he doesn't move on from grieving so much as that particular plot thread is abandoned entirely. Later, another brief cutscene introduces you to the main group of antagonists, some of whom are never actually seen again. Whilst the open-world does a good enough job of showing the player a living, breathing Lucis, full of settlements big and small, their people engaging in conversations about anything from everyday minutia to whichever crisis is ongoing at that point in the game, the empire receives barely any development at all. Knowing your enemy is a major part of becoming invested in the experience, but I found myself unable to care about what little I knew of Noctis's foes.

By the end of the game, the imperial presence in FF15's world of Eos meant little more to me than the aircraft that would so routinely interrupt my travels to drop a group of Magitek Soldiers on my team. If you engage in optional activities to even the smallest extent, these altercations will be your main source of interaction with the antagonistic empire; what few officers and leaders they have disappear permanently not long after being introduced to you, and not necessarily because they were defeated. It's a baffling inadequacy in a game that took a decade to make. Final Fantasy has for years been a name synonymous with rich world-building and compelling stories, but Final Fantasy XV's decade-long development has produced an incoherent, muddled narrative that fails to match the scope and depth the developers no doubt intended for their world. Whilst the plot and its delivery do bring down the overall experience, there is a great deal of good to balance out the bad.

In some ways, Final Fantasy XV is both endearing and spectacular. Someone on the development team clearly understood how great an impact the little things can have, and it's in subtlety and nuance that FF15 is at its most charming. Although driving the Regalia is almost entirely an on-rails affair, it's made more enjoyable by the group's humourous exchanges and, best of all, the ability to listen to the soundtracks of previous Final Fantasy instalments, which can be purchased from vendors across Lucis. The track listings aren't complete, but there's something undeniably nostalgic about listening to FF10's Blitz Off or Blinded by Light from FF13, not to mention classic tracks from the series' earliest instalments. When you're done for the day and settle down at a camp or inn, you'll get to see the photographs Prompto has taken that day, and you can save any you like. Some are fairly typical – locations you've visited, people you've met – but the rest have real potential to amuse or delight. Alongside pictures of the group posing together by a landmark, I had photos of the four of them mid-battle with fearsome daemons – powerful enemies that only appear at night – or trekking across Lucis with a town visible in the distance and the sun just right in the sky beyond. Having Noctis and company settle down at night with a meal to pore over Prompto's handiwork always succeeds in strengthening your connection to them and the bond they so clearly share; it's just a shame that the rest of the cast wasn't treated so lovingly. From helpful mechanic Cindy, with her inexplicable accent and ridiculous attire, to fearsome warrior Aranea, anyone who isn't a part of Team Noctis will receive little in the way of character development, if they get anything at all. It's another jarring disappointment from a series that has in the past so consistently created compelling and likeable supporting casts.

It's often people like those who will be issuing your quests, but outside of a few generic lines of dialogue you'll learn almost nothing about them, and lesser NPCs are recycled with a consistency that would be impressive were it not so tedious. One man, a hunter named Dave of all things, pops up in settlements across Lucis, tasking the group with going to a nearby location and retrieving the dog tags of a fallen hunter. His dialogue rarely differs each time – “Fancy meeting you here. Mind collecting some dog tags for me?” – but he somehow has more of a presence than many of the game's more prominent characters. Rather than taking a copy-paste approach to side quests to the extent that they're almost MMO-esque in depth and variety, more time could have been taken to show us more of what we need and want to know. For all of the occasional chatter about her, Lunafreya has shockingly little to do in the game, which is worrying indeed given that as the Oracle she acts as a liaison between humans and the gods. By the end of the game, I could only find three aspects to her character: she and Noctis were in a long-distance relationship, she could communicate with the gods and she opposed the empire. Beyond that, there's little to learn. With so many excellent leading ladies to draw from in the series' history, it's a shame that Lunafreya contributes so little. Outside of Noctis's group, characters seem to exist only to push the heroes in a certain direction, lacking a real purpose or personality of their own.

That's the prevailing problem with Final Fantasy XV: it feels aimless. Winning battles and accomplishing certain feats awards you with experience points and AP with which to power up your party members, but it hardly feels rewarding. Most enemy encounters can be won with minimal effort, making the huge number of side missions and hunts feel completely unnecessary. The story will drag you from place to place on the whims of one person or another, but when the credits rolled I found myself with more questions than answers, and not for lack of paying attention. It's easy to get lost in the experience, to allow yourself to wander the wilds of Eos, undertaking hunts to eliminate powerful enemies before you seclude yourself at a nearby fishing spot, but the facade crumbles when you go anywhere near a main story mission. Final Fantasy has been erratic in quality post-FFX, but never before have the problems been so glaring, so detrimental to the overall experience. With ten years of development time, no matter how troubled those early years might have been, it shouldn't have been like this.

7/10

#Final Fantasy #Final Fantasy XV #FF15 #Noctis #Ignis #Gladiolus #Prompto #Square Enix #Reviews #My Stuff

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yourgodmoments · 7 years

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Two-Sided Salvation - part 5

The side of the state of man that is ‘unsaved’ is often accompanied by fear. Fear is not a natural state. We have to be indoctrinated to feel afraid, to reflect the mindset of an anxious world. It is our most formidable defense mechanism.

However, what is it defending us from? Pain. It is a pain that we seek to avoid at all costs. Fear tells us, ‘It’s coming! Run!’ Yet most of the time, what it is that we are running from is some imaginary thing we think might happen.

Fear keeps you from being still and facing the truth. It is not a helper; it’s a killer - often inflicting its host with anxiety, insomnia, ulcers, high blood pressure, heart attacks, strokes and cancer. Fear is the sum result of childhood conditioning which impresses upon you a sense being inadequate with regards to living life. It’s a state being immensely overwhelmed by false beliefs.

When you are in that state, you can never plant your feet firmly in reality, in the present moment, because you are always running away in your mind. Some people even try to hide in their ‘spiritual’ pursuits, paying attention to their rituals rather than opening themselves up for the transformation of the Holy Spirit.

There are many other distractions and addictions that we use to hide as well; but this robs us of the ability to see what we are truly up to, to stop and notice if fear is working for us. Not! When we let fear reign, we steep in denial regarding the innate goodness that God has molded into us. Often, we are given into despair.

The three primary fears are: the fear of death, of abandonment and of impermanence (change). The fear of death grows from a fear of the unknown, abandonment from a belief of being unacceptable, and change from a deep desire to be in control.

The answer to beating fear is the answer to living life. We need to hop over the fence to the side of salvation in order to connect to God through Christ. God has always been in control; we just have to connect with Him and He will make your life blossom by guiding you on the path that He gave you at birth:

Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths. Pr. 3:5 - 7. NKJV

Ask Him to examine your soul and untie all the knots that you fettered yourself with. He’ll do that by revealing the truth of the wonder that you are, as well as expose the lies that you had heretofore believed in:

The spirit (conscience) of man is the lamp of the LORD, searching and examining all the innermost parts of his being. Pr. 20:27 AMP

God tells you that fear has nothing to offer you:

The fear of man brings a snare, but whoever leans on, trusts in, and puts his confidence in the Lord is safe and set on high. Pr. 29:25 AMP

How many fears will God remove?

I sought the LORD, and He answered me, and delivered me from all my fears. Ps. 34:4 NASB

All of them.

You don’t have to fear other people (which usually is a product of misunderstanding through poor communication. Indeed, you may only be reacting to the other person’s fear of you, because they haven’t seen God show up in your behavior):

When I am afraid, I will put my trust in You. In God, whose word I praise, in God I have put my trust; I shall not be afraid. What can mere man do to me? Ps. 56:3, 4. NASB

You don’t have to be afraid of evil. Christ did not come to tell us how be victorious over the satanic machinations in the world. He’s already doing the work. He just wants you to stay connected to Him:

Little children, you are of God [you belong to Him] and have already defeated and overcome them [the agents of the antichrist], because He who lives in you is greater (mightier) that he who is in the world. 1 Jn. 4:4 AMP

You can also put your past behind you because the blood of Christ has cleansed you of all transgressions, and you can now focus on the newfound love in your heart:

Do not [earnestly] remember the former things; neither consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing! Is. 43:18, 19. AMP

Being saved, you will now look forward to change. Why? It’s because you will now be connected to the only source of stability:

“For I am the LORD, I do not change…” Mal. 3:6 NKJV

And, you can take it to the bank that every change you will experience will be one that is sanctioned by God to bring you to the next step in your highest and best life.

Finally, the greatest perk of salvation is that you need not fear death any longer:

“Behold the tabernacle of God is with men, and He will dwell with them, and they shall be His people. God Himself will be with them and be their God. And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying.” Rv. 21:3, 4. NKJV

Praise God for His salvation!

Goodnight and God bless.

#afraid and running #fear #fear is indoctrinated #fear kills #God removes all fear #salvation brings fearlessness #two sided salvation

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404fmdtaejin · 3 years

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aesthetic & playlist & headcanon — summer habits

summary: taejin’s naturally disciplined in the sense that he’ll get up at early hours of the morning if it means he can squeeze in a workout or at the very least, a run. being in california for the beginning of june gives him even more the reason to workout — most cast, he’ll beat jet lag with a quick run around the resort area or if he’s lucky, he’ll take some advantage of california hiking trails. playlist: around summer time, taejin goes back to his summer playlist. he’s that type of person to switch around his playlist from the sad ballads of winter or the hopefulness of spring, to straight-up happy and bustling music of summer. california only adds to it, and he takes in his personal faves which add to the “girl group domination” of the summer tunes. these songs are what he would frequently share with his fans as well. it’s what he listens to at his workouts, and his runs. luckily, his manager is also a fan so they’ll even jam out to this playlist together while they’re moving from schedule to schedule. (idc i’ll put view and rollin in as many playlists i want) warnings: body image tw wc: 622

playlist

1. party — 립스틱 (lipstick) / 소녀시대 (snsd) 2. dance the night away — 위시 (wish) / 트와이스 (twice) 3. dun dun dance — 오마이걸 / oh my girl 4. 회전목마 / merry go around — 아이즈원 / izone 5. touch my body — 비 (bee) / 씨스타 (sistar) 6. lucky star — 디사이퍼 (decipher) / 샤아니 (shinee) 7. 아주 nice / aju nice — 찲 (charm) / 세븐틴 (seventeen) 8. 빨간 맛 / red flavor — 퓨즈 (fuse) / 레드벨벳 (red velvet) 9. 뷰 (view) — 디사이퍼 (decipher) / 샤이니 (shinee) 10. 롤린 (rollin) — 브레이브걸스 (brave girls)

taejin likes to workout, and it’s not one of those things “i LOVE WoRkInG oUt” and dreading it. but he actually does like working out and finding different ways to

being in california, he’s given the benefit of nicer weather and the somewhat aspect of being able to freely run outside — something, that he can’t really do in seoul unless it’s just some random hour and he’s at the han river

so, he makes use of this to his advantage. taejin will be up at five am (on most days) getting a run in outside, and usually — this is just a light jog he does because he feels like this is the best way to “wake up” and get him ready for the day. plus, there’s just running endorphins that he gets when he can run. a five km jog will usually be his go-to quick run

if he can’t manage a run, then the least he’ll do is grab his jumprope and do some jumproping for 30 minutes. this is the workout he swears he got taller from because his mother used to make him jumprope / play basketball, and low and behold, it paid off because now he’s tall. this is habit that he picked back up once he started doing some boxing / kick boxing back in seoul.

then he’ll come back and find something to eat before heading to the gym facilities where he’ll do a bit of weight training. this sort of thing when he has time early in the morning becomes his “morning” work out habit because when he does not workout in the mornings, he’ll feel like he’s completely tired / empty for the day and something is missing.

aside from that, during the summer time, taejin has a few other habits that he has.

one is obviously the playlist, which you can’t really call a habit? but he has a tendency to listen to girl groups more than usual during the summer time, only because he sees it as fitting, and the cheerful and boppy happy music fit well with the summertime

another habit he tends to have is that he likes to spend time outside — it’s hard to do so in seoul as mentioned before, but in california, he’s given more use of the outdoor space, so he’ll either step outside for a walk or just waste time outside. in seoul, he relegates his time to the night time to at least take a stroll around han river once a week

taejin tends to cook more in the summer just because he feels like the ingredients are fresher (placebo effect). but he does make use of the fresh herbs and what not his manager gives him, and mainly this leads to a lot of gourmet cooking since that’s the only thing he’s good at

he tries a lot of fresh salads and cooks a lot of meat? and mainly, that’s just because that’s the easiest. usually in the summer time, he’ll be more than likely to invite people over for “wine night” at his place, just because he feels more open and welcoming in the summer days / night than he does in any other season.

the last habit i would say that taejin has in the summer, is that he’s more prone to naps? taejin has insomnia, and has trouble sleeping. however, in most cases 99% of the time, he’d never take a nap. but something about free time and feeling the summer heat, just lulls him into a nap where he’ll end up falling asleep in his living room and waking up not realizing he had just fell asleep for two hours.

aka kim taejin is somewhat lazy but also productive in the summertime.

#body image tw #김태진이 왜 그럴까 → 생각 #다시 듣자 → 노래 #(queued)

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kitsunesbooks · 7 years

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The Stunning World of Final Fantasy XV

When it comes to story, in any form of media, the world of that story is what always grabs me first with characters at a close second. The setting can make or break a story for me and it often disappoints me when I see worlds that serve only as a backdrop. In my opinion, no world should be put to waste. Worlds need to interact with the characters and vice versa. A world shouldn’t serve the single purpose of providing a locale for the variety of actions that unfold. One of the ways that writers tend to avoid the struggle of world building is by setting their world in a modern era. Final Fantasy XV takes that idea and hurls it into the friggin stratosphere.

Final Fantasy XV is a game I have been playing quite a lot, but wished I had more time to dedicate to. I have spent ten years waiting to play this game, and even though I am aware that the story deviates from the original plot of Versus XIII, the original title of XV, it is still a phenomenal game. And one of the things that makes this game such a grand revival of Final Fantasy is it's absolutely gorgeous open world. The world of Eos is teeming with life and vibrance and has instantly become one of my favorite video game worlds ever since I first laid eyes on the city of Insomnia back in 2006. Its flawless blend of fiction and reality is something to behold as it creates a story steeped in a beautiful depiction of open road Americana.

In most stories that blend fantasy and reality, the real world often shoves the fantasy side in the back seat. This is almost too true for A LOT of Western stories. This is especially true for books and tv where a “fantasy world” is often showcased as just a damn forest. Final Fantasy XV proves that it is possible to seamlessly meld fantasy and reality in a way that balances the two and creates a world that viewers/players can actually believe is real. The city of Insomnia is a sight to behold. The beaches of Galdin Quay remind me of the shores here in Jersey as well as the Caribbean islands. The forests of Duscae are extremely reminiscent of the Appalachians. There is so much beauty in this world and it is definitely the highlight of this game. Not only that, but it demonstrates that it is possible to make an alluring fantasy world set in a modern era. It is easy to take our world and just put some magic in it, but when you take the time to really flesh out the fantasy side of things you get something less generic. The visuals definitely aid in painting the gorgeous landscapes of Eos, but that shouldn’t stop writers from using deep level descriptions to really emphasize the fantasy part of their settings. If anything, the visuals of FFXV should encourage this level of detail in writing. Final Fantasy XV should be an example of how to do a proper modern fantasy.

The towns all feel heavily lived in and well populated. While the roads may feel a little barren at times, traffic always picks up near the variety of towns and settlements. Lestallum is one the prettiest and quaintest little towns I have ever seen, with its quiet and rustic city scape. Insomnia, though we never see much of it, is a sprawling metropolis reminiscent of Tokyo. Hell, even the Hammerhead garage takes design elements akin to those aged rest stops you find on those long midwest highways here in America. I would rant about how gorgeous Altissia is, but I haven’t gotten there yet. All of these places feel so close to reality while still keeping a strong fantasy style that helps to seamlessly meld a world of science and a world of magic. I think one of my favorite parts about the game is all the different foods you can try at rest places. Every hotel/restaurant has a variety of different menu items adding a layer of culture to each place you visit. It is a detail that is completely unnecessary but adds a layer of depth to the world. And the fact that this same small part of the world can actually help you in the game shows a genuine understanding of how open world games should really work, or really any game for that matter. Games that have mechanics that work together with the lore really stand out to me. That is why I am such a fan of the Souls series. Final Fantasy XV nails that harmony between the story and the game.

Another amazing aspect of Final Fantasy XV is the photography. Prompto, one of your party members, has a deep affinity for taking pictures. This adds to the road trip aesthetic that game flawlessly delivers on. Almost every shot is a stunning view of the world as a backdrop to the characters. There are even a few photo op places scattered around the world, such as the Disc of Cauthess in Duscae. The photography really does the world a ton of justice and teeters on the verge of uncanny valley. The photos are almost too true to life. Even my mother, who never plays video games, had to comment on the photo-realism of the game’s amazing graphics, which do an amazing job to add color and vibrance to the world Eos.

Though the world is fantastic there are a few problems. While, one them I don’t necessarily have trouble with, others seem to dislike it. That of course is the large amount of product placement. While it is kind of dumb to have the characters themselves talk about friggin Cup Noodles. I can at least see why a game like this could be such a potent vehicle for product placement. There is so much of it, simply because it works. It doesn’t take your eyes off things when you see it. If anything it brings us much closer to our reality and makes the world of Eos seem like more of an altered version of our Earth. Product placement CAN be used as an effective writing tool to help sell a story as something that could exist. But when it is thrust into the dialogue in a clumsy fashion, like almost all product placements do, it falls flat on its face. But hey, that Audi R8 in Kingsglaive looked pretty damn cool.

On the other hand, the one complaint I have with the world is that despite how interesting it looks, the lore is tucked away. The world amazingly fleshed out and a beautiful sight to behold, but it doesn’t really embody its lore as strongly. That is a problem. But, then again, at least it has lore to begin with. Eos, has a pantheon of gods, it has a creation story, it has lore tied to each of the major kingdoms such as Nifelheim and Lucis. But it falls a bit short for not being put somewhere in the actual game. I would have really enjoyed being able to uncover tidbits of lore throughout the open world, like in Dark Souls for instance. But I will settle for what I have.

I honestly don’t know how long I can gush about this game without sounding too repetitive. I will more than likely be doing some more articles on FFXV as I play through more of it. Future articles will be much more in depth than this one for any of you looking for some juicy research.

Stay Frosty, Adam Schmidt

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