#billy hargrove needs a hug

[weird-an]

Before they became friends, Billy didn't get touched a lot. Not in the way Steve does. Without thought, without pain. Careful.

Nobody has ever been careful with Billy. Why should they? He can take it. He has to.

It's absurd. The whole thing. Making a friend in Hawkins, finding something good in the fucked up cluster of days that are his life. Their hands brushing against each other and Billy's heart is stopping. Steve is patting his back and Billy choked. Billy lies awake at night and wishes he could feel Steve's long fingers again.

It's odd. Hands on his body that don't take something, but give something back.

Steve laughs. They watch a dumb cartoon, but Billy watches Steve. His whole face lights up when he laughs, dimples forming on his cheeks and brown eyes sparkling. Billy should look away, but he can't. Has to stare at Steve and how he's fucking glowing.

Steve's laughter ends in a snort and he turns around to Billy. Billy feels caught. Guilt makes his stomach churn. He shouldn’t stare.

Steve puts his hand on Billy's shoulder. Not in the way the guys slap his back during practice. Not in the way Stacy did last week when she tried to slip her hands in his jeans at the movie theatre. Not in the way his dad does when he pushes him to the ground. Not in the way he holds him until Billy cries. Not in the way anyone ever did.

No, Billy feels the tip of Steve's fingers pressing against his spine, then carefully wandering across the muscles, stroking lightly and pushing against them.

Billy can't breathe. His eyes burn and he shakes his head, but it doesn't help. Only makes him more dizzy.

He expects Steve to pull his hand away. Steve doesn't.

"Is that okay?" Steve asks, voice low like he's asking Billy for a secret.

Billy doesn’t trust his voice. Just gives Steve a nod.

He can't look away. Steve's eyes are warm like his hand.

"Can I try something?"

Billy's tongue sticks to his gums. Another nod. A bit shorter, a bit unsure.

Steve pulls his arms around Billy. Presses his chest again his own, squeezing Billy tightly.

It's a hug, Billy realizes slowly. He's sinking against Steve. He wants to bury his face in the nape of his neck, but he doesn't dare.

One of Steve's hands strokes his hair. He keeps holding Billy. Billy doesn't want him to stop.

He didn't know it could feel like this.

[acozysoulwrites]

The boy who will live | B.H

Description: Billy and the reader are sitting on her bed when he begins to need some comfort.

Warnings: none!

Her window is open, white transparent curtains dancing in the breeze, sending the scent of fresh linen through the room. They are sitting on her bed facing one another. Her legs are crossed, and his messily mirrors hers, the only difference being that one leg hangs off the edge.

It is the morning after Billy ran from home. The morning after his big argument with his father and somehow, even with the darkening bruise below his jaw, he’s still beautiful.

“Then you fold it like this,” she says, folding the paper like so. Billy finally sees the swan she’s trying to make.

“Where’d you learn this?” he asks, his eyes meeting hers as he leans forward for a better look.

She’s peculiar. An odd little thing that he can’t quite get enough of. She alone might be enough to curve his cigarette craving. That’s how addicted he is.

“Well, my dad taught me” she grins, eyes dropping back to the paper swan.

Billy nods. It was so much easier with her. Easier to make conversation, easier to smile… and easier to breathe.

“What?”

He was staring again. As of late, Billy would do this thing where he’d get lost in her eyes, the color of her hair in the sun, and how she held her mouth when she was silent. It was embarrassing, to say the least.

“Sorry, just uhm- you got something there” he points to her chest, and when she looks down, he taps her nose.

“Billy!”

He smirks, but that quickly softens into a smile.

“God, you’re so beautiful” he whispers only loud enough for her to hear.

She blushes. “I’m really not,” and she means it. Billy isn’t quite sure if she can see properly, though, because to him, she’s genuinely the most beautiful girl in the world, and he doesn’t care if that’s cliche.

Suddenly, he sighs and falls backward, bouncing slightly as he hits the bed.

“What is it?”

Billy is quiet for a moment, then he speaks.

“I’m not as angry anymore because of you”.

She frowns. “is that a bad thing?”

Fuck no. It’s amazing. He’s never felt better.

“It isn’t a good thing when I’m not angry or being a fuckin’ asshole; people seem to take that as an opportunity to try and get me to open up. Vulnerability kills.”

She shakes her head and reaches behind her, where the stack of paper lies scattered on her nightstand.

“C'mere”

Billy lifts his head up, his messy curls still pushed out of his face.

“What?”

“Take this pencil and paper and write ‘i will live,’” She says simply.

Is she serious? He eyes her for a moment, and when she doesn’t pull away, he takes them into his hands.

“Okay…” he says slowly, hesitantly writing the words. “I… will… live. There.”

She reaches into his jacket pocket and pulls out his wallet. Gently, she takes the paper from him and folds it. She then opens the wallet and slides the paper into the empty I.D. slot.

“There. Now, when you worry that feeling something is going to kill you, just read that”.

Billy wants to cry. He wants to wrap her into his arms and cry and smile until his face hurts. Instead, he smiles and takes it, eyeing the words closely.

“Thanks…”

“Yeah, of course” she smiles.

“I uh…” Billy pauses, his eyes meet hers, and she knows exactly what he’s trying to say.

“And I, you,” she says, “and hey” She places her hand on his shoulder. “You’ll get there.”

[prettyboybillyhargrove]

Maybe that's a reach but...

Can we talk about how Dacre improvesed the cookie eating scene?

He said Billy had anxiety and we know some people eat when they feel anxious (like me). He was feeling anxious while "flirting" with Karen. So much so he stops acting for a split second and try to suppress his anxiety. Look at his eyes.

Also we know he was stressed after all this act. Look at him leaving the house. He's holding up the hand he holds the cookie. Why? My guess is him holding his pendant for a relief. Because I have my own comfort items too.

Look at his face. He can't stand this shit anymore.

Also the worse part is they literally put a song "I'm falling in love" behind this scenes. This was underage Billy trying to find his sister and flirting with an adult woman to do so. Because Mrs Wheeler ma'am didn't tell him where Maxine is in the first place. She literally waits there and watch him flirt and then give him the address. What an adult.

[vilentia]

Fragments of Forgiveness

Billy Hargrove x reader

part 1 | part 2

Summary: When anger tears them apart, Billy must seek redemption to save their love. Will forgiveness prevail or leave their hearts shattered forever?

Rating: Mature (M)

Categories: angst, fluff

****

A couple of days had passed since that painful, anguished moment between Billy and you. The air was heavy with tension, and each passing second felt like an eternity. Billy had been tormented by his actions, unable to escape the remorse that plagued his every thought.

But as the days went by, a glimmer of hope began to flicker within him. He couldn't bear the thought of losing you, and he was determined to make amends, to prove to you that he was capable of change. The love he felt for you was a driving force, pushing him to become a better person.

With a newfound determination, Billy gathered his courage and approached you cautiously, his heart pounding with anticipation and a mix of fear and hope. He had rehearsed his words a thousand times in his mind, desperately searching for the right ones that could convey the depth of his remorse and the sincerity of his desire to make things right.

"Y/N," he called out gently, his voice laced with vulnerability. "Can we talk? Please, give me a chance to explain and to show you just how sorry I am."

You turned towards him, the hurt still evident in your eyes, but there was a slight softening in your expression. Your love for him hadn't vanished completely, buried beneath layers of pain and doubt. A part of you longed for reconciliation, for the possibility of rebuilding what was broken.

Hesitant but willing, you nodded, indicating your willingness to hear him out. Billy's heart soared with a mixture of relief and gratitude. Taking a deep breath, he started to pour his heart out, his words filled with remorse and vulnerability.

"I can't find the words to express just how deeply sorry I am, Y/N. The thought of hurting you, the person I love more than anything, is unbearable. My anger took control of me, and in that moment, I lost sight of everything that truly mattered. But now, with a clearer mind and a broken heart, I see the magnitude of my actions. I never want to be that person again."

As Billy spoke, you could feel the rawness of his emotions, as if he was baring his soul to you. His voice trembled, the weight of his regret hanging heavily in the air. He didn't try to make excuses or shift blame—he took full responsibility for his mistakes, acknowledging the pain he had caused.

Tears welled up in your eyes, mirroring the depth of the emotions within you. The love you felt for Billy hadn't vanished completely either, buried beneath the pain and doubt. The desire to rebuild what you had once shared began to stir within you, cautiously reawakening hope.

"I want to believe you, Billy," you whispered, your voice quivering with a mix of hesitation and longing. "But we have to take things slow. Rebuilding trust will take time, and we both need to work on ourselves. Can you promise me that you'll try?"

Billy's face softened even further, his eyes glistening with tears of remorse and determination. He reached out, gently taking your hands in his, a silent pledge of his sincerity.

"I promise you, Y/N," he vowed, his voice filled with unwavering determination. "I will do whatever it takes to earn back your trust and to be the person you deserve. I will show you, every day, just how much I love you. Actions will speak louder than words."

And in that moment, the weight of his apology transcended mere words. It was in his tender touch, his earnest gaze, and the genuine vulnerability he allowed himself to show. Billy knew that love wasn't just about grand gestures or flowery declarations—it was about proving himself through consistent actions, day in and day out.

As you looked into each other's eyes, a silent understanding passed between you. It was a fresh start, a chance to heal and grow together. And with the weight of the past slowly lifting, you both knew that the journey ahead would be a challenging one, but it was a journey worth taking—for love, for forgiveness, and for the possibility of a brighter future.

[mungroveenthusiast]

Eddie would be big spoon.

[camaro-and-smokes]

Snowfall on the Sahara

Notes: When I started to think what to write for @harringrovelovefest 2024 I remembered that I had a draft for this laying around and @lovebillyhargrove wanted to know what happened to the boys after Snow on the Beach. So, here it is. Lovefest prompt would be 'Being crazy in love' 💜 Title from the song 'Snowfall On The Sahara' by Natalie Cole.

Rating: Mature (tagged this as such just in case even though there's really nothing like that) Warnings: No Warnings Characters: Billy Hargrove, Steve Harrington, Robin Buckley Tags: Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Boys Kissing, Boys In Love, Steve Harrington and Billy Hargrove have a crush on each other, POV Steve Harrington, Love Confessions

Read on AO3 >>

Summary: It's hard to be with Billy, yes, the world isn't ready for them. But still Steve had been with him since that one night at the quarry when Steve saw everything anew. He's been wanting to say the three little words ever since, but has been afraid to. What if Billy gets scared and runs away? What if he doesn't feel the same?

But... what if...what if he does feel the same?

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

“Oh, for fuck's sake!” Steve shouts when he accidentally nudges the pile of film posters on the backroom table of Family Video, making every one of them, except Mad Max, spill on the floor.

He's collecting the pile when Robin peeks into the room. “Hey, we could hear you all the way from the counter. The four of us,” she says. “Me and the mother and her twins, who I just rented Bambi for the tenth time. I am not sure if there will be eleventh time or if there is, she'll complain about our language through it.”

Steve pinches the bridge of his nose with his fingers. “I'm sorry. I was about to leave and I nudged the pile and... I just...” He sighs. “I have a date, I wasn't even supposed to be working today, and now I'm late.”

Robin's eyes bulge from her eye sockets and she walks into the room, closing the door behind her. “You have a date? An actual date with a living, breathing girl?”

Steve's not in a mood for her sarcasm and just glares up at her as he keeps collecting the posters into a pile next to him.

She squints as she leans to the door and crosses her arms over her chest. “You haven't told me anything about any girls. For a very long time, I might add. Which is kinda odd, but let's not get into that now. Who is she?”

“None of your business,” Steve retorts, and winces immediately. He looks up. “I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that. It's just... Uh... err... Her, umm, dad doesn't know and he really wouldn't like it, so we'd like to keep it like that. It's a secret. No one can know.” Steve shakes his head vigorously. “Honestly. No. One.”

“Secret? Steve, hello, it's me. There is no secret you couldn't tell me. I'm supposed to be the one who's afraid of you accidentally spilling the beans on my secrets, not the other way around.”

Steve stands up, places the posters on the table and leans his back to it, looking ashamed. “Yeah, well, I never knew before there could be secrets like this. Secrets that...” he couldn't end the sentence. He swallowed. “Secrets that could get someone killed,” he whispered.

Robin stares at Steve blankly for a while. “Okay,” she says slowly, “the dad really doesn't like you.”

Steve plays with his car keys and shakes his head. “It's a double-sided dagger, the whole thing.”

When he looks back up, Robin is looking back at him, concerned. After a while, a smile tries to force its way on her face. “Has to be one hell of a girl if you're willing to go that extra mile.”

Steve snorts. “Not just one but several, trust me,” he replies, amused. He feels his cheeks heating, and he looks down. “Yeah, it's worth it.”

“Okay, Casanova,” Robin smiles, “you go to your mystery date. Tell her I said hi and that your secret is safe. Because I don't even know who she is.”

“Sure, I'll tell...her,” Steve chuckles as he walks out through the backdoor.

Steve drives out from the parking lot and speeds towards the Lover's lake. He is late, he's already supposed to be there, and he's not sure if Billy will wait for him to show up this time.

Once Steve was five minutes late and Billy didn’t speak with him for a week because he thought Steve was punishing him for something by being late. Another time Billy left in the middle of their date because Steve had looked at him funnily, as if he was trash–Billy's exact words.

On some nights, Steve stared at the ceiling and wondered if it all was worth it. The hiding, being super careful of not accidentally revealing anything to anyone, making sure no one knew who he was meeting with and where. Not being able to tell everyone that he was in love with Billy and shout it from the rooftops.

It wasn't what he had dreamed of.

But then he thought of Billy listening to him talking about being lonely and being forced to live alone most of the time, not even his parents really caring about him. How he had nothing to wait for in the future. He sure as hell wouldn't get into college, and he had no idea what he could or wanted to be or do when he grew up.

And Billy understood what he meant, the feeling of being lost and alone, feeling like no one cared. Later, Billy had quietly whispered how he feared his dad and that if he ever found out about him and Steve, he'd surely beat him to death, if not both of them.

Them sharing their deepest fears, trusting each other with truths that they shared with no one else, couldn't share.

And then he thought about Billy's laughter and a smile spread across his face. Not the mean one he let out on the basketball court, but the other one. The one that bubbled out from his throat effortlessly into the air when he felt safe.

Steve had heard it for the first time when he'd taught Billy new pool tricks in their basement–because playing pool was one of the few things Steve was actually really good at and his parents supported it by buying him a real pool table. Anyway, Billy had known the basics, but Steve had given him some pointers, and when Billy had cleaned the table for the first time, he'd laughed that laughter.

It was like a fucking siren song. Something had shifted inside Steve at that moment, never to be the same again.

Since then, he'd done all he could to make Billy laugh like that.

One of the ways to do that was to make out with him on the couch until they both were rock hard and desperate for each other, almost on the brink of coming. Either would take the other's hand, pull him to the stairs, and no matter which one it was, Billy would always laugh and giggle all the way to Steve's room.

And so Steve thought of Billy in bed, underneath him or riding him, so so pretty and so willing, so ready just for him. His lips parted, panting hot and heavy in the rhythm of Steve hitting his prostate. Repeating Steve's name straight into his ear, said out loud just for him, whispered like it was a plea or a prayer. The way Billy's eyes fluttered close just before he came so Steve could always tell when he was close, how he moaned and groaned out loud shamelessly as he rode through his orgasm, a blissful expression on his face. How in the aftermath Billy always wanted to be the small spoon, how he wanted and needed to be held, kept safe even if for five brief minutes before he had to go.

And how Steve wanted nothing more but to do that, how he needed to. To support Billy, to stand by him, to love him, to keep him safe.

Yes. It was all worth it. It wasn't their fault that the world wasn't ready for their love. And they sure as hell wouldn't let the world stop them from loving each other, even if they had to keep it a secret.

Steve parks the Beemer behind Billy’s Camaro on the side of the road where it’s shortest walk to their spot by the Lover’s Lake. At least Billy hasn’t left yet, which is a good thing.

Steve doesn’t just walk but runs through the forest to the lake and then walks swiftly the tiny trail that leads to the small cove they found a while back.

It was incredible that something like it had gone unnoticed, the sand there was untouched when they found it. It had become their safe haven, even though they had to still be careful.

It's still warm even though fall is already reminding of itself by having turned leaves yellow here and there. Steve rolls up his jeans to his knees, and the water is up halfway to his shins when he passes the cliff that shelters the cove.

Steve sees Billy there, sitting by the shore and blowing out smoke rings. He lets out a relieved breath and can't help smiling as he walks out from the water to Billy and sits down next to him.

They're quiet for a while, until Billy asks, "What took you so long?"

There's hurt and insecurity hidden underneath the words.

“Fucking Keith got sick in the middle of the day and I had to cover for him. I would've called if I... I'm sorry.”

Billy looks away and wipes something from his cheek quickly.

An expecting silence falls between them. Steve knows by now not to rush whatever Billy is about to say, letting him say what he needs to say.

Finally, Billy turns to look back straight ahead to the other side of the lake. “I thought you'd forgotten,” he mumbles.

Something warm and fuzzy takes flight in Steve's chest and flutters its wings tentatively. He smiles, leaning towards Billy, nudges his shoulder with his and whispers, “I couldn’t forget you. And I'd never leave you hanging on purpose, gorgeous.”

Billy’s cheeks turn pink and he looks down while a tiny smile forces its way onto his face. He glances at Steve. “Gorgeous, huh?”

Steve wants to kiss Billy so badly. They’re so close, he could just lean in a bit and if Billy turned his face right then... but Steve just smiles. “Yeah. That.”

“Careful,” Billy says, tries to make the word sound like a warning, but it falls flat.

There's nothing Steve has to be careful about and he knows it. He grins. They play this same game each time they meet before they can get into the meat of things. Billy trying to keep up his defenses, his walls, and Steve softly and gently demolishing both one brick at a time. He knows it’s not easy for Billy to let his guard down, so he plays along. “Don’t lie, you like it,” he says, leaving out when I call you that. He'd say it out loud if they were alone in his room, but here out in the open it goes unsaid.

The rosy shade on Billy’s cheek deepens a notch, confirming that Steve is right.

Fuck it. Steve’s tired and doesn’t want to go through the whole nine yards today. “Wanna take a swim?” he asks.

Billy shrugs. “Well, if you want to get your ass kicked in a race to the sunken rock. Again,” he replies. He tries to sound indifferent, but he’s also already taking his boots off, so.

Steve doesn't bother rushing, he knows what's coming. So, he looks around and when he sees no one on the lake he leans back in his hands and unashamedly watches Billy undressing.

Billy is taking off his socks when he stops and looks at Steve, frowning. “Are we doing this or...?”

Steve smiles smugly. “Oh, we're doing it. But there's no harm in looking at first, is there?”

Billy scrunches his nose, but the redness on his cheeks turns darker.

Steve can't help but to laugh a little.

“Asshole,” Billy mutters with a small smile and pulls off his left sock.

“But I’m your asshole,” Steve whispers, making Billy smile wider as he gets up.

Billy throws the sock at Steve, making him yelp. “Come on, pretty boy, I’m going to win at this pace before you even get off the shore,” Billy says and pulls off his shirt.

Steve gets on his feet before Billy has taken barely a step towards the water. He grabs the waistband of Billy’s jeans with both hands and pulls Billy against him. “Not so fast,” he says, wrapping his arms around Billy's waist.

Billy giggles as he tries to pull away, using the damn siren song on Steve to cloud his mind and making his hug looser than he planned. Steve’s readying himself for Billy retaliating by tickling Steve, maybe - that’s Billy’s go-to weapon. But when Billy turns around, he just smiles and lets Steve to pull their bodies together.

Billy's smile and eyes still sparkle with mischief and Steve is not sure what’s it about. “You threw your stinking sock on me,” Steve says, trying to sound hurt.

Billy turns the corners of his mouth downwards, lowers his chin and looks down to the ground for a while like a kicked puppy. Then he turns his gaze back up, opening his eyes huge and fluttering his long lashes while pursing his lips. “I’m sorry,” he whispers huskily. “What can I do to make it better?”

Steve’s insides melt while his lower body forgets the things we don’t do in public -rule. He didn’t know Billy could do that. Look so innocent while promising all the sins Steve's mother always warned him about, all at once. “I, uh...can think...um...uh...” he replies, feeling his own cheeks heating and his mouth being suddenly very dry.

“Can you, now? Think?” Billy asks and his tongue slowly wanders from the corner of his mouth towards the sharp cupid’s bow.

Steve’s eyes lock onto the motion, and he swallows. He’s totally lost for words.

Billy leans closer, raises his chin and tilts his head, ready to kiss Steve.

And Steve leans in and closes his eyes, already feeling Billy’s breath on his skin.

“Race ya,” Billy whispers, pushes Steve just enough to get Steve to let go, and runs towards the waterline, laughing and stopping just for a few seconds to pull off his jeans before running into the water. He’s almost waist-deep before Steve even realizes what happened.

“Not fair!” Steve shouts and starts undressing as fast as he can.

“Snooze it and lose it,” Billy cackles before he dives under the sparkling surface and starts to swim with long, strong strokes towards the underwater rock that’s halfway to the middle of the lake.

Steve has already lost this one, he knows, but it doesn’t matter. He knows what awaits him by the rock.

When Steve finally gets by the rock, Billy already sits on it, water up to his hips. It’s a big rock, and Steve hoists himself up to sit next to his boyfriend.

“You should really work on your concentration. Performance like that...” Billy tsks, “is not gonna fly in a long run.”

Steve leans into Billy’s space. “I’ll show you a performance,” he whispers into Billy’s ear and licks the outer side of his earlobe. When Billy turns to look at Steve, his lips parted and ready for a kiss, eyes on Steve's mouth, Steve pushes him off the rock.

Billy falls off with a yelp. When he comes back on the surface, he pulls his hair away from his face and glares up at Steve. for a moment Steve is the tiniest bit worried that he accidentally made Billy lose his mood altogether.

But then Billy laughs and splashes water on Steve. “Is that all you got?” he taunts playfully, and Steve’s worry melts away. Billy pulls himself back onto the rock and sits next to Steve, closer this time, close enough so that their thighs are touching.

“I’m really sorry I was late,” Steve says. In the water, underneath the surface, he takes Billy’s hand in his and laces their fingers together.

Billy nods.

The shy gesture would be so out of character for Billy if he was anywhere else but here alone with Steve. When the cocky armor he wears melts away, he looks so young, like the eighteen-year-old he is. Uncertain of the world ahead, hoping for the best and truly fearing for the worst–the latter for a good reason.

Steve's happy that he's not the only one who’s lost. He leans to Billy’s shoulder. “What was that you did back there on the beach?” he asks.

Billy looks down and smiles shyly. Crinkles form into the corners of his eyes and he’s blushing again.

Steve can’t help smiling either. “I liked it,” he whispers.

Billy glances at him. “You did?”

Steve nods, smirking. “It was weird. But also hot.”

Billy smiles a wide smile as he lays down on the rock on his back and is almost engulfed by the water. “Want more?”

Steve leans his elbow on the rock, trying not to forget that it’s slippery, and looks at Billy, who looks back with the widest grin. Suddenly, Steve feels stupid. Stupid as in how seeing his boyfriend happy makes him forget every smooth one-liner he planned and practiced, and just stare - probably with a goofy grin.

And it all suddenly tucks Steve's heart in a way he didn’t know was possible. The fuzzy thing in his chest spreads its wings and the wings are so big that it’s a miracle that he's not floating in the air by now. That’s how high he is from the mere sight of the boy he loves. Loves. Who hopefully loves him back. A little. Maybe?

Steve leans down, whispers, “You're hot,” and kisses Billy.

Billy smiles against Steve's lips and lifts his hands to run his fingers through Steve's hair. When they have to stop to breathe, he whispers, “You're not so bad yourself, pretty boy.”

Steve sets his thigh between Billy's legs and his other arm around Billy's torso, hugging him tightly as they continue kissing.

It doesn't even matter that the wind has picked up a little and the water splashes on their faces from time to time in small waves. The water is warm, the sunlight on their skin is even warmer, their insides burning as they breathe through each other.

Until the rock reminds them that, indeed, it's underwater, full time, and slippery.

Steve fixes his position just a little to get even closer to Billy, but the arm he's leaning onto slips just a little and he falls on his side, and the only thing he can try to hold on to is Billy.

They hit the water at the same time.

They both emerge from the water and Steve is immediately on Billy, trying to look for signs of any scratches.

“Are you okay?” Steve asks, concerned. “I’m so sorry, I forgot the stone is...”

Billy looks at his arm and rubs it. “I might have a tiny scratch. Nothin’s broken.” He raises his gaze back to Steve and grins. “But you can show me how sorry you are.”

Steve smiles. Had it been any girl he would be endlessly apologizing to get out of the doghouse. With Billy, instead, it's just nah, it’s just a scratch. Now kiss me.

So easy. So right.

Steve pulls Billy against him, wrapping his arms around Billy's waist, and looks at the sparkling blue eyes and the lips that are already slightly parted, ready for devouring. He wants to say I could spend the rest of my life looking at you, but decides that it's probably still too early for that. “I’m sorry,” he whispers, and kisses Billy.

Billy’s lips are soft, they always are. Warm, too. Kissing with Billy is always a rush this time, too. Steve smiles against Billy’s lips. It's been just a month since they first kissed at the quarry and he is so head over heels that it might’ve been embarrassing if it was anyone else. He wants to tell Billy, but whenever he looks at him in the eyes, determined to say the words, he gets this icy dread inside him. What if Billy runs away when I say how I feel?

Billy pulls back from the kiss slowly, leaving Steve chasing after him until he realizes Billy is looking at him with that tiny smile on his face he always has when they're laying in bed and coming down from their orgasms.

Yeah, he had the cocky, wide grin on his face many times too, making it blatantly clear that there was going to be a round two or three and Steve had nothing to say to it but to endure. But this small one always promises something else: that Billy has something intimate to say, just for Steve to hear.

“I love you.”

The words are barely a whisper, but Steve can read them from Billy’s lips. He blinks a few times, feeling his jaw going slack of the surprise of hearing the words before saying them himself. He's so stunned that Billy apparently takes it as a rejection, because his face turns pale and his eyes dart back and forth in Steve’s, probably thinking that he’s done the worst mistake of his life.

Billy is already pulling away from Steve when Steve finally manages to remind his brain of how to work.

“Hey,” Steve gasps and smiles. “I love you, too.” Now that he's not the first one to say the words, they fall out of his mouth so easily.

Billy looks at him warily. “You do?”

Steve smiles a bit wider, because now he can free the overwhelming emotion from its cage inside his chest where it's been trapped until now, letting is soar to the open sky. “Yeah. I’ve been trying to find a way to tell you, but it never felt right to say it because I was afraid that...that-that you wouldn’t feel the same.”

An impossibly wide smile lights up Billy’s entire face and he lets out a soft laugh. “You’re the best thing that’s happened to me in this fucking sorry excuse of a town ever since we moved here. Of course, I feel the same.”

“I've felt like this ever since I saw you at the quarry, smoking in the evening sun.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. You'd been a definite asshole until then, and you're that a little still,” Steve says grinning, “but you were so beautiful, standing there in the sunlight... I stood no chance. I was done for right there and then.”

Billy goes red – his entire face, tips of his ears and all the way down his neck – and he looks down bashfully. After a while he looks back at Steve, that wide smile on his face the traps his tongue between his teeth. “That's... uh... That's the most beautiful thing anyone has ever said to me.”

“Yeah?” Steve asks, feeling his own cheeks heating, too.

The expression on Billy's face changes and he bites his lower lip. Steve knows that look. He knows it so well, the promise, the yearn in it, and he lets out an involuntary breath.

“Wanna say it again?” Billy asks huskily.

Steve's eyes go wide. “Yeah,” he says, with conviction.

He lets go off Billy and the moment he does Billy is already swimming towards the shore, leaving Steve to catch up.

“Snooze it and lose it,” Billy shouts after him.

"Asshole!" Steve shouts and starts swimming.

[billysbbybfff]

Personal headcanon that Billy hugs less and head bonks more.

[ellewritesandrants]

I was inspired to write some insecure Billy and Steve afraid that the other would leave so here you go!

Billy’s just so used to being left behind or abandoned that he expects it which is why it’s odd for him that Steve sometimes looks at Billy as if he’s the one who’ll be leaving. Sometimes, Steve gets into these moods where he just pulls Billy into his arms and drags them either to the couch or their bed, clinging onto the blond so tightly almost as if he was begging the blond not to go.

Billy was bewildered because, if anything, it should be Steve who should want to go. Billy was a mess, even before this whole thing with the Mindflayer and that just made it all so much worse. Before, Billy could hide behind muscles and charisma and now, he was a shell of his former self, spooked at the weirdest things and incapable of looking at himself in the mirror.

It had been a wonder for Billy to wake up in a hospital bed, with Steve’s hand tightly gripping his not only because he’d thought he was going to die when he faced that monster but because he’d thought Steve had replaced him with Robin before he found out that Robin was a lesbian. Billy had fought, not only for his sister and her friends but also to protect Steve because he didn’t ever want to hurt Steve again after that awful night at the Byers where his paternal trauma was triggered.

When Billy had woken up, it was Steve’s hand that kept him grounded. It was Steve’s stories that filled his day. It was Steve’s presence that made him want to keep living so it didn’t make any sense why Steve would even worry about Billy leaving. Didn’t he know that Billy was sure thing for him but that he was too good for Billy?

Not only did Steve open up his heart and also his home to Billy but the brunet had taken care of him, dealt with him through the ups and downs of his recovery. Even through the moments he’d wished he’d died, Steve had been his rock keeping him grounded. Sure, Billy was recovered now according to the hospital but he could never go back to being the same person he used to be.

Billy hadn’t even been able to get behind the wheel of his baby yet. It had been fully restored months ago, just waiting for him to make the engine purr but even just being inside the car stirred up memories of the monster that controlled him and he hasn’t been able to get himself to move past it, relying on Steve mostly for rides if not walking to build up the stamina he’s lost. He could never stay out too late or go anywhere near Brimborn or the Holloway’s house. It brought up bad memories and sent him spiralling.

Even the thought of touching a person had reviled him for a long time after waking up, with Steve and El being the only ones he didn’t hate touching. Max was the first one he forced himself to familiarize with again, after promising his little sister that he would take this second chance to be a better brother. He’d eventually forced himself to do the same to Max’s friends and Susan since he didn’t want anything to do with the Billy who killed dozens of innocent people and he wanted to at least try to be someone Steve deserved.

Steve often told him that he was surprised by how insecure Billy really was and how amazing he was to have recovered so quickly but Billy didn’t really think he was all that amazing. If he was, he wouldn’t have killed all of those innocent people. He wouldn’t have had his father killed after the government scientists realized Neil was abusive and therefore, a threat to extinguish in order to keep their new subject. If he was as amazing as Steve thought he was, there might even still be a chance he deserved Steve.

The truth however, would always hurt. Billy didn’t deserve Steve. Steve deserved happiness. Steve deserved love. Steve deserved everything good in the world and there was absolutely no was Billy could ever give that to him, even before he became the wreck he was today. Steve deserved someone whole who could give him the big family he’s always wanted and someone he truly loved. Steve deserved better than him and while Nancy Wheeler wasn’t all that better because she cheated on Steve, Steve loves her and Steve deserves the opportunity to love who he really wants without the baggage of Billy.

That was why Billy had jumped on Mrs. Byer’s offer to take him with them when they moved to California. It would allow Steve to pursue the person he really wants while giving Billy enough space to lick his wounds. It wasn’t Billy leaving Steve. It was Billy giving Steve the chance to be happy and that’s why he didn’t get why this argument was even taking place.

“You’re going with the Byers to California? Why, Billy? I thought you were happy here.”

“I am!”

“Then why are you leaving?”

Billy wanted to lie and make up some excuse about him needing space or sunlight to recover but he couldn’t do that, not to Steve.

“Because you’re not happy with me here.”

“What the fuck are you talking about, baby?”

“You didn’t think I’d notice? Stevie, you only really ever smile and laugh around your friends. You make jokes with them and you play around and you get to be a teenager with them. The minute you’re with me, you’re stuck taking care of me.”

“Because I want to, baby. Don’t you realize that?”

Steve tried to reach out but Billy only moved further away. Billy scoffed.

“You’re just saying that. Look, Steve, you deserve to be happy and I think you’d be happier without me here.”

“What? That’s complete and utter bullshit.”

“No, it’s not. I’m a mess, Stevie. I’m a shell of my former self. I weigh probably 140 pounds soaking wet, I’m covered with scars and I get triggered by the simplest things. I’m dead weight, extra baggage. I didn’t deserve you back then and I definitely don’t deserve you now. You deserve someone who’ll make you happy.”

“And that’s you, baby.”

“Don’t lie to me. Everyone and their mother knows that it’s Nancy.”

“Nancy? Where the hell did you get that from?”

“I saw you and her the other day and I know she’s the first person you ever loved. She can give you the big family you want and don’t even try to tell me that you don’t want that. With me gone, you can get her back and be happy.”

Steve pinched the bridge of his nose and took a deep breath before he took Billy’s hands in his.

“Fuck, darling, you’ve got it all wrong, okay? Nancy wanted to meet up because she wanted to say goodbye. She’s going with the Byers too since she got into the same college as Jonathan. And as for the big family, yes I won’t lie, I do want that but the 6 shitheads we’re usually in charge of are more than enough for me right now. I do want to eventually adopt some kids or even have some of my own but I can do that with you.”

“But you don’t have to!”

“Why not, sweetheart? I want to do it with you.”

“I don’t deserve you, Steve.”

“Stop trying to tell me what I deserve. Why are you trying so hard to leave me?”

Billy couldn’t stop the tears from falling.

“Because I don’t want you to regret me. I don’t want you to waste the next how many years taking care of me and eventually getting sick of me before you finally realize you deserve better than me.”

I don’t want you to leave me like my mother did.

“Fuck, baby, if anything, you deserve better than me.”

“What the fuck are you talking about, Steve?”

“I lied to you and hit you first that night. Everything could have probably been avoided had I told you the truth earlier. Our fight, your posession, everything. It’s all my fault for not telling you. Hell, I was the one who wanted to keep us a secret from everyone until you were possessed by the Mindflayer and that’s why I didn’t know what was happening until I saw you at the mall. You deserve better than my fuck ups.”

It was Billy’s turn to hold Steve’s hands in his.

“Fuck, Stevie, it’s not your fault. You didn’t know about my dad back then and we don’t know if my knowing would have changed anything. You were the only reason I bothered to live when I woke up. Every single part of me hurt but the look of relief on your face kept me motivated to keep going because I wanted to keep seeing you even if it would be the last time. You take care of me better than I take care of myself and you’re so patient and understanding with me. It’s not your fault, babe. I didn’t even know you blamed yourself for this, Stevie. It’s not your fault.”

“If you say so. Y-You do know I didn’t date you out of some misplaced sense of guilt, right? I’m here because I want to be, because I love waking up in the morning holding you. I love messing around in the kitchen with you. I love being able to take care of you and spoil you the way you deserve. I love you, Billy and I know I don’t say it enough but I love you.”

“I love you too, Stevie.”

“Does that mean you’ll stay?”

Steve looked so hopeful that Billy didn’t have it in him to leave. If Steve wanted him here, Steve would have him. As long as Billy was wanted by Steve, Billy was willing to fight the voices in his head that told him he wasn’t enough.

“I guess so. I’m sorry for trying to leave, Stevie. I promise I didn’t want to. It’s just, I thought you needed me to.”

Steve pulled Billy in for an all encompassing hug and Billy melted into his lover’s embrace.

“Don’t ever try to leave for my sake again. Now you know that I both need and want you in my life and as long as you’re willing to stay, I’m willing to have you here with me.”

Billy couldn’t help himself.

“Even if it means forever?”

“Even if it means forever. You’ve got me whipped, Hargrove and I don’t ever want to be free.”

Billy groaned.

“You’re such a sap, Harrington.”

“Ah, but I’m your sap.”

[lithium80writer]

The Fence (A Billy Hargrove Short Story)

Chapter one, Chapter two

Chapter three: Hope

⚠️This is a darker story. ⚠️ Billy Hargrove short story. This story will focus a lot on Billy's abuse from his father and Josephine's mental and sexual abuse from her stepfather. Can these two lost souls find sanctuary in each other? Trigger warnings ⚠️: Descriptions of sexual assault in first person and domestic abuse. Language. Thoughts of self harm and suicide. Disturbing topics. Smut. ⚠️ This story is not for everyone but more an emotional release for me. Thank you for reading. 🖤 Upside down doesn't exist. Max is not Billy's sister. It's just him and Neil.

******

Josephine's POV

Day one of the basement is always the worst. I have to adjust to losing my sense of sight, my sense of time. I sit against the cold, hard floor and stare into the nothingness. It's pitch black. I try to wave my hand in front of my face. Nothing. I can see nothing. The tiny window that used to give a light glow is now painted over.

He likes to take away anything that I love. Sunlight being one of them.

I bring my knees to my chest and place my chin against them. I wonder how long it'll be this time. He was angry to begin with but fighting back made him even angrier. After the first day of being down here, the rest all run together. I haven't been here in a long time.

I haven't missed it.

I'm hungry. He won't feed me for a few days. And when he does, it will be only enough to keep me alive. Welcome to the basement.

Billy's POV

"FUCK YOU!" I scream at the top of my lungs as I slide into the driver's seat of my car. I see my dad running down the steps of the porch and I sling the stick into the drive position. I press down on the pedal before he can reach me. And I'm gone. I roll my windows down and welcome the breeze flying in.

I scream. Again and again and again as I fly down the road. My eye is swollen shut this time. He really can't help himself this week. Must be problems with his latest lady. I drive down the street and wish I could keep driving and never stop. I've always thought about it. Just leaving and never coming back.

I'm a pretty tough guy. I can take a punch from anyone and not feel a thing. Anyone but him.

It's not the pain from his punches that bother me. Sometimes I don't even feel it anymore. It's the realization that he doesn't love me. The realization that I'm nothing but a punching bag to him.

He gets to take out all of his anger on me but what would he do if I returned the favor? I'm getting older now. Stronger. Sometimes I think I could take him.

I work out a lot. I've been trying to build my strength in case that day ever does come. I want to hurt him. Make him bleed. Watch as he begs me to stop. I want him to feel what I've had to endure for years.

But it wouldn't matter. He couldn't actually understand. It's not the same. I can kick his ass but he won't know how it feels to have the man who is supposed to love you completely destroy your childhood.

Who would I be if it wasn't for him? I think about that often. Would I be kinder? Less angry all the fucking time? Would I be happy?

I'll be 18 soon and I can't wait for that day. I can almost taste the freedom. Nothing but the sound of my car purring as I drive away from this hellhole. Away from him.

Would I miss him? Would he miss me? Yeah I know it's fucked up but he's my dad. He's all I know.

Maybe I can take Jo. Help her. Save her. That's crazy talk, Billy.

Was it my fault that she was MIA? Did I fuck up? I just wanted to see her. I need more information. Or maybe she just isn't interested, Billy. No. It has to be him. I can still see the sadness in her eyes.

What do I do? How can I help?

********

Josephine's POV

I run my finger along the line in the wall. Tracing it all the way down. I can barely stand but I have to keep moving. How long has it been? I'm starting to feel crazy. More crazy than usual.

I'll sing. Maybe that will help. My voice comes out hoarse. I need some water but my small cup is empty. I sing anyway.

"Wait a minute, baby. Stay with me a while. Said you'd give me light. But you never told me about the fire."

My usual sweet tone is scratchy and distorted. I've always loved to sing. Just for me. I love Stevie Nicks. She's my favorite. I listen to her again and again and she takes me to a different place.

Even though my voice is cracking and my throat is begging for relief I continue on.

"Drowning in the sea of love. Where everyone would love to drown. But now it's gone. It doesn't matter what for. When you build your house then call me home"

I trip over something and my knees fall hard to the concrete floor. I can't move. I can't pick myself up. I don't have the energy. He ruins everything. I curl into a ball and await the sound of the door creaking.

I can't wait to see the sun again. I can't wait to feel it. I miss my tree. And even though I've only seen him once, I miss Billy.

Billy's POV

A letter Billy? Really? I need to talk to her. Showing up on her doorstep was a mistake. I have to do this quietly. But how?

I dig through my backpack pulling out my composition notebook. What do I say? Will she even see it? She probably doesn't care. Maybe I'm fucking delusional. Maybe I imagined that look. Fuck.

I grab a pencil and tap it against the paper. I hate writing.

Hey.

Hey? Fuck... I tear the paper from the notebook, crumbling it quickly. This is stupid. I quickly write a few lines and fold it up.

Short and simple.

Now how do I get it to her? What if he finds it? Think, Billy.

A book. The tree. I saw her there before. It's worth a shot.

I don't own any books. Playboys? Hustlers? Sure.  But not exactly the look I'm going for.

I remember an old box my dad has full of books he's never touched. He won't miss it. I pick one and smile. Romeo and Juliet.

Cheesy? Absolutely.

I stick the letter inside and head for the back door. I take a peek through the small hole in the fence. No one. I carefully drop the book by the tree. I hope she gets it.

"William!" I hear him. But the fear is less than usual. I feel a little excitement. A little anticipation. A little hope.

Josephine's POV

"Josephine." I wake to his voice. My heart starts pounding. I can't see him but I can smell him. "Have you learned your lesson?" the monster says. I hate you. "Yes, father." I say instead. I hear the metal screech as he screws in the lightbulb.

My eyes burn as the light floods my vision. I feel dizzy and lightheaded. I squeeze my eyes shut tightly. I have to adjust slowly. My senses are on overdrive.

He pulls me from the ground and I have to lean into him to make it up the stairs. It makes me want to cry. But I have no tears left after my time down here.

My feet feel heavy as I make it up the stairs. More light. Sounds. It's been so quiet. I'm overwhelmed. Overstimulated. "Bath." I croak. He leads me to my room and lets me go. I fall to the floor and hear my door shut behind me.

********

It's been two days since I was set free from the basement. Today is outside day. I hope he lets me go. I need the sun.

"Thirty minutes. And I'll be watching." he appears in my doorway. I can't stop the smile that spreads across my face. My eyes begin to water and I jump up quickly.

I run to my spot. My tree. A book? This isn't mine. I see a sliver of white sticking out of the top. I take the book and rest against the tree. I open it slowly and see my name scrawled across the folded paper.

My mind is swirling with thoughts as I open it as carefully as possible making sure to shield it behind the book.

Dear Jo,

I haven't seen you around recently. Just wanted to make sure you were okay. I tried to come see you. Just to say hi. My lip is healed now. Replaced with a black eye but hey.. one thing at a time, right? Please let me know you're okay.

Your friend from the other side of the fence, Billy

I want to write back immediately but I have to wait. I do my best to hide my expression. I feel something in my chest. Something I've never felt before. Hope.

********

Dear Billy,

I was happy to get your letter. I'm sorry for disappearing. I am okay. Is your eye better? I hope so. Your letter caught me by surprise. It made me feel happy. I don't feel that a lot. So, thank you. Write back soon.

Your friend from the other side of the fence, Josephine.

****

Dear Jo,

My eye is fine. I'm a big boy. Are you sure you are okay? I was worried about you. Is this okay? The letters. I like hearing from you.

Your friend, Billy

****

Dear Billy,

Define okay. I will survive. I'm a big girl. I like hearing from you, too. The letters are okay. We just have to be careful. My father is.. strict.

Your friend, Jo

**** Dear Josephine,

What is strict? Does he hurt you? Is he like my dad? Your eyes looked sad but they were beautiful. I wish I could see them again.

Billy

****

Billy,

Sometimes he hurts me. But you can't tell anyone. Please. You have the prettiest eyes and I think about them often. They remind me of an ocean. I've never seen the ocean.

Your friend, Josephine

****

I want to help you. Billy

****

I want to see you. Jo

****

Today was bad. Will write more soon. Always thinking about you. Billy

****

I can't take it, Billy. Do you ever feel like you can't take it anymore? Josephine

**** Talk to me sweetheart. What happened? Your Billy

**** I need to see you. Your Josephine

[cavinginhisfvce]

"You actually thought I loved you?"

Ship: Harringrove. Unedited.

TW: Child abuse, SA mention, toxic relationship, manipulation, breakup.

"You actually thought I loved you?"

Those words replayed in Billy's mind for hours after he'd left Steve's house, after he'd slipped into the Camaro and sped down to the Quarry to get trashed.

When Steve all but shouted it at Billy, the boy had wanted to yell back, "no, because no one fucking loves me. Not my mom, not my dad, not Max. Not you." But he knew the elder wouldn't care. It would just be a bunch of noise, embarrassing, soul crushing noise added to the room. The room where Steve once laid him down, and peppered kisses down his body, held his hands, and called him baby, sweet boy, he told Billy he was his. He belonged to Steve. The room where he told Billy he loved him. Told him he wanted to take the blond away from his shitty father.

He was so fucking stupid to think this thing with Harrington had meant anything to him, he was a goddamn fool to believe those round, chocolate pools when Steve showered him with praise.

It had never been anything more than lust induced infatuation, but stupid Billy went and fell in love. He fell for the boy with doe eyes and a shy, yet captivating smile. That same boy could spit vitriol in ways Billy could never imagine.

He was so dumb to believe that King Steve could ever love a damaged person like Billy, it was naive for him to give into the siren call of being loved and valued. 

Boys like Billy don't get tender touches, and sweet kisses, and if they do, they definitely don't get them long term.

It hurt, mostly because Billy had gone against his better judgment to be with the brunet, had defied his father's lessons, his rules, the same ones he spent years beating into his son, for a chance with the boy who smiled brighter than the sun shined.

He told Steve about his childhood, about his mother leaving him with his father, he told him about the babysitter who touched him, and the cop who followed in his footsteps the first time Billy was arrested for fighting.

Steve knew every intimate detail of Billy's life, he told him he was worth loving, only to quite literally laugh in his face. 

Two months after the breakup, Billy found himself holed up in Harrington's bedroom, his brows pinched in discomfort as the elder frantically attempted to apologize for his words just weeks before. He was red in the face as tears spilled down his cheeks, his voice trembled when he spoke. His hand was sweaty, something Billy once found amusing. 

He wanted to fold, wanted to jump onto Steve's lap and kiss the air out his lungs, chasing the sweetness that always accompanied one of the boy's millions of kisses. 

Instead, Billy did none of that. 

He slipped his hand from Steve's and abruptly stood up, his sock clad feet made no sound when they met the carpeted ground. There was no sound aside from the squeak of Steve's door as it swung open. 

There was silence until Billy was pulling on his boots at the door, and Harrington had breathlessly trailed behind him. 

"Why are you still leaving me? I need you, Blue Bird…Y-you can't leave…"

Steve's words almost tune out the ones from a few weeks ago, but they still ring louder than any confessions Billy's ever gotten.

He shakes his head, clicking his tongue as he turns his head to glare at the boy he wanted nothing more than to lay in bed with, cuddled up like they spent every free weekend together for the past ten months.

"You left. You don't get to cry, or pretend you're so heartbroken to be rid of me."

Steve is quick to object, his bottom lip quivering, Billy just wants to laugh, "I love you, please don't do this! I need you, Billy."

The younger boy takes a shaky breath, his eyes turning misty despite the anger fluttering in his stomach. 

"I'm tired of being treated like shit, by everyone, Steve! You dumped me, you don't love me, and if you do, you're gonna have to do more than cry to fix this." He pauses, flexing his fingers.

"You haven't even told me why you said that, why you had to go for the one thing you knew would hurt more than if you would've told me I deserve the crap I've been through! 

You love me, but what happens next time you change your mind, Steve?"

"I would never say that.

I won't change my mind, Billy…please. Just give me one more chance, and I'll make this right…"

Billy scoffs, now turning to face the door. 

He doesn't believe Steve, not even a little, but he's so desperate for this to work out, so desperate to have something that makes his life of hurt just a little less painful. Even if that something might destroy him in the process. 

"You want a second chance, Harrington? Fuckin' earn that shit."

Steve doesn't reply, not that Billy gives him the chance to. 

By the time Billy's blinking, and Steve is about to confirm or deny his willingness to fight for the blond, he's peeling out Steve's driveway, his tires skidding with the movement. 

"You actually thought I loved you?" 

"No," Billy thinks bitterly. "But I love you."

[weird-an]

Billy is straight. Steve is... just a phase. He's confused. Hawkins is wearing him down and he's finally fucking losing it.

Steve isn't Billy's boyfriend. They are just fucking. Billy doesn't miss him when he lies awake at night. Billy doesn't think of him every day.

But Billy's heart cracks a little when he sees Steve in the hallway, laughing at something Nancy Wheeler said. Suddenly jealousy is sitting sour and heavy on his chest.

A boy meets a girl and they fall in love. That's how the story is supposed to go. Billy has listened to it so many times. He just doesn't get why he can't see himself in there. But it will pass, for sure.

He hides under the bleachers, smoking a cigarette for lunch and maybe also avoiding Steve.

He finds him anyway. He always does. When Billy is running from himself, when Billy is trying not to be seen - Steve always sees him.

"Here you are," Steve says, looking behind him. The bell rings. They should go back to class. "I was looking for you."

"Were you?" Billy asks, tone as bitter as he feels.

He shouldn't be worked up about this. Steve's going to find a girl like Nancy again, because Billy and him aren't anything.

Billy isn't in love. Billy can't be in love, because if he is, he's fucked.

"Of course." The words sound so easy. Like it's the most natural thing for Steve to come looking for Billy.

"I missed you," Steve says. "I wanted to find you, but then Nancy.."

He stops. Mid sentence. Billy wonders what he sees in his eyes.

"You don't have to be jealous, Billy." Steve cups his face. "I'm not seeing anyone else."

What is Steve trying to say? There's nothing between them.

"You're not my -" Billy stops when Steve raises his brow.

"I'm not your what?" he asks, a smug smile ghosting over his lips.

Billy swallows dryly, heart fluttering. "Are you... my boyfriend?"

Steve grins at him, bright and happy.

"I have been for a while, Billy."

Happiness, Billy decides, is Steve's arms around him and his laugh in his ear. This isn't just a phase. He hopes it will last.

[waspinyourdrink]

Billy Hargrove being given space and support to heal, learing to show love and weakness and starting to mend his relationships is literally my favourite thing in fanfics

[connordax]

How is it possible that I was not aware of the existence of this photo?!?!

[prettyboybillyhargrove]

I know I'm looking into it to much but-

Listen to his voice broke. "STAY away from her" the broken voice. He's literally breaking the character in this moment. He can't keep the acting, his voice is shaking. He doesn't want him to stay away no he wants Lucas to stay with her. This are Neil's words not his. He's trying to do what Neil did to him. Maybe he had a lover in Cali and that's exactly how Neil reacted when he founds them so that's his only response.

But also he's so tired at this point. Neil called him a slur, beated him, he makes him apologize from Susan when he didn't even do anything wrong, he couldn't go to his date but also forced to call them in front of Susan and Neil. This is humiliating. Neil threated him like shit and he comes this place just to get his sister. -I'm not even going into the Steve lying him about her and it's actually creepy part we talked about it before- but this bitch is only there to take his sister home just like Neil wanted. But they won't let him.

If there's a one villian in this story it's Neil not Billy. If there's a person who could kill them it's not Billy it's Neil. Billy knows what could happen if he doesn't take Max with him when he went back home. He's scared. And he literally get beaten by the person he's trying to protect but also he gets drugged? Holy shit.

I don't even wanna think what did Neil do when he wakes up and go home. It's just-

[acozysoulwrites]

He is beautiful, and i’ve always loved beautiful tragedies | B.H

Description: You’re hanging out with Billy, admiring his features as he lays on top of you in this empty field you two stumbled on (This is really just the reader lusting for Billy)

Warnings: none

Billy lays on top of me, his hair dangling down around his face perfectly, damp from the dewy, foggy air.

We stumbled upon this field while driving around. There was no real destination, the two of us simply enjoyed getting out of town every once in a while.

I blink as a few strands of his hair tickle my cheekbone and a shutter makes its way through my body. Every touch of his makes me feel like I'm floating. Every single one.

Billy brings his hand up to my cheek and I make note of the bruises on his knuckle i’d be sure to fix up later, his lips slightly parted, "You're so fucking pretty" he breathes, his eyelids heavy and lovestruck as he runs his fingers over my face, making sure to touch every single place he loves to kiss.

"You mean that?" I ask.

"Yeah I do"

"I'm not just another one of your girls you hang out with on the weekend? Not just a secret?" I ask, I know I'm pushing it, pushing his buttons, but I can't help it. I need to know. I need to know that I am the only fucking person in his world. That if he ever gets hurt, or if that stupid fucker Neil ever lays a hand on him, that I'm the one he runs to.

He laughs, a soft airy laugh from his nose, the corners of his mouth forming into a smirk. When he notices that I am staring into his eyes, completely serious, it fades.

"You're serious?" he asks.

I frown, though it feels more like a pout as he runs his fingers through my hair now. I am simply desperate for his approval, for his need.

"Yes" I whisper, my eyes flicking to his lips as he leans closer to me. He still lays on top of me and my legs have started to tingle from the lack of movement. But I do not care.

"I am as serious as a heart attack, baby girl" He whispers into my ear.

My body covers in goosebumps and I grip the loose fabric on his back tightly. "Yeah?" I whisper, it's almost a whimper.

"Fuck yeah princess"

I groan. "Stop it"

"No" His voice is low and it comes out in a rasp.

"you'll regret making me attached to you" I warn, my hands in his hair again, I tug playfully and he groans. "You might regret it".

His eyes soften and his smirk fades. "I don't care what happens to me," He says.

That makes me feel sick. I know he doesn't. He told me once that he doesn't even think he will make it to 20. I refuse to let that happen. I refuse to ever lose this boy.

"You don't have to care, I care enough for the both of us," I say simply.

He pauses, and for a moment, our eyes connect something shifts, and then he groans, rolling over with me in his arms.

God, he's fucking perfect, even as a bottom.

"What?"

"Nothing" I lie.

"What are you thinking about?"

How I'd marry you.

"I think" I begin, my hand rubbing his chest, "That it is going to rain soon, we should head back"

He nods, we stand up together, our heads rushing as blood flows through our bodies, and we walk to the car.

[reneetje]

Jep that's me