#botw zelda baby i’m so sorry. one more game that does this to her and i’m gonna start biting people

[ruinpowder]

i’ve been trying to avoid spoilers for totk because i havent played it yet but i do know a little bit abt zelda’s storyline in that game and the more i play botw the angrier it makes me. like why can’t they be nice to her. let her have a character arc that isn’t based entirely on traumatizing her again. fr makes me upset to think about

[zelzenik]

i just finished Age of Calamity, and i'm like.... i'm in tears?!?! in tears or close to it

oh my gosh

this is going to be a disorganized rant, sorry in advance </33

/// spoilers incoming ///

okay i got this game on release day. i wasn't able to touch it until recently because irl's been actually insane

i've been going through it recently so i decided to start playing it, if only for some stress relief

somehow, i managed to avoid most spoilers (thankfully, even tho i started playing mad late), but i did hear a lot of ppl's opinions on the storyline and characterizations and stuff

i tend to pick things apart a ton bc i'm a very analytical person so i went into this game determined to NOT do that, lol

(i'm very glad that i did.)

Nintendo really went, "yes, we know the timeline for this franchise is already hella screwed so why even bother fixing it? </333"

i purposefully tried to distance myself mentally from BotW and previous Zelda titles because it's Hyrule Warriors and i just wanted to enjoy the game for what it was

i'm just... i'm...

the story is a whole mess, but for what it's worth, it made me feel something. seeing Zelda's struggle through her own eyes as opposed to Link's was really touching, and i found myself relating to her a lot as the story progressed

i think that the way they chose to focus on Zelda more instead of Link through this storyline was kind of cool. i know we don't usually get to see a ton of depth with Link, but we usually see even less with Zelda incarnations, and this felt really special

i'm such a Zelda stan, can you tell?

Impa was cool! she looked too much like Paya to me tho ;-; i kept calling her Paya kjfghkdhfg. her playstyle was difficult for me to master at first, but i can appreciate her (and her devotion to the King/Princess)

i also appreciated the further characterization of the Champions. as usual, Revali and Urbosa had the most personality, i feel, with Mipha and Daruk a bit slighted. even still, seeing Daruk afraid of dogs and Mipha with baby Sidon and Urbosa calling Zelda little bird and Revali failing then succeeding in front of Zelda just felt so perfect. it made me so SOFT

being able to play as the Champions was so cool. i appreciated them all individually, but my favorite is Revali (i just love my arrogant archer birb, and i'm not a Revali local). i loved him instantly from BotW when most of the fandom was slandering him. Urbosa's lightning gauge is brilliant, and tossing her shield around like a frisbee is goals. Daruk being a slow, powerful roly poly was a 10/10 experience, and using Mipha's Grace as Mipha was kind of surreal after like 500-600 hours' worth of BotW. using all the Champions' abilities while playing as the Champions was incredible

bruh, okay, tbh, i loved Hestu in BotW, but making him a playable character in AoC was a questionable choice imo...... AND HE'S VOICED BY THE SAME PERSON AS MARINETTE??? he so slowww. but he kinda cute? i don't use him that much ;-;

lowkey everything kinda went downhill after Hestu tho in terms of continuity within the game itself

random time travel glitch in the matrix to bring Riju, Teba, Sidon, and Yunobo to the scene </3333

playing as Riju is kinda rough; i still haven't grasped the rhythm that comes w playing her yet, but she and Patricia are such a dope team. Teba is EVERYTHING; i loved having another archer to play as, and his glide is so cool. Sidon's surf shark is genius, and his combos flow fluidly (ew, pun). Yunobo... is Yunobo. i don't think i used him very much kjdfgkjdfhg

the Great Fairies were an... interesting addition? so was Monk Maz Koshia? i don't use them much either, lol

BUT MASTER KOHGA LOL. ngl i love seeing various interpretations of the Yiga Clan (ones where they're sinister, ones where they're devious, ones where they're bloodthirsty), but seeing them as silly bad-guys-turned-good was cool. Kohga's surprisingly easy to use too?? he's such a clown, and i appreciate it

King Rhoam is a jerk. but he also has a cool playstyle, and i honestly... ugh, i wish Nintendo would let Zelda and Link have non-dysfunctional parents. whenever i write fic using Rhoam, he's not going to be a jerk bc both he and Zelda deserve better ;-; his little beard stroke whenever he does a special move, lol

idk if i'm forgetting any characters, but... if i did, i don't use them </3

my mains were Zelda and Revali with Link, Sidon, Teba, and Rhoam as supports. i also really liked Urbosa, Daruk, and Kohga but used them less for some reason

but YEAHH. after 67 hours later, 73% of my map is completed, and i'm finally done with the main storyline

i feel... happy ish now. life is difficult right now, but this game made it even a little bit more bearable for me, and i think that that's part of its beauty

gosh, i could write meta after meta abt this game, but i probably won't because i want the magic to still be fresh in my mind

i'm #emotional now

[cheekbites-moved]

ok i still havent gotten the secret ending but farming for it might take me a bit so im gonna make a thoughts post for age of calamity now:

Major spoilers obvs so ill put it under a read more

things i enjoyed:

revali beatdown simulator

the controls for the divine beasts are a bit clunky, but i think the angles they used for them did an excellent job at really making the player feel like we were actually controlling a divine beast. so i think it was done well.

link’s personality really gets to shine full force in this game with the amount of cut scenes and it was wonderful to see

every character clearly had a lot of love put into how they operate. they truly all feel unique, & all of their play styles fit them really well in my opinion

the game does a really good job of making you understand what a real threat the monsters are. like in botw they’re intimidating at first, but once you’re far enough into the game they become just an inconvenience to work around if anything. this game managed to actually make certain monsters intimidating for me again, and i think that’s a real accomplishment

the blight battles are actually somewhat challenging in this game and that is truly a commendable achievement lol i think all the bosses are good tbh. i didnt rly dislike or not enjoy any of them.

the way daruk and link’s friendship & urbosa’s motherly relationship towards zelda got to shine was. so good. it’s all i could’ve ever wanted

seeing the descendants again was really nice & it was awesome to see the champions interacting with them!! especially sidon and mipha omggggg. that was. really fucking good shit

kohga. just. kohga in general. getting to see more of him was really rad, he’s such a fun guy! and his english va was Excellent. you could really tell he was having a lot of fun playing him, and it was lovely to see! :)

zelda getting to really shine in this game was also lovely to see. and her being so assertive and badass by the end? omg. it was so wonderful especially after botw. man. 

the combat is done very well imo. im rly glad that they took so many elements from botw, but also added their own flares to make it feel fresh. it was rad.

sidon’s tagline is “winning smile” and his power is “boundless optimism” and i think that’s beautiful

the music in this game is SOOOOO good oh my god. multiple times during playing i had to pause to just appreciate it. it’s pretty much all remixes of botw with a few originals for the new characters, but they all slap. there was not a single song in this game i didn’t like. it is definitely one of my favorite video game soundtracks officially. maybe one of my favorite overall soundtracks in general tbh.

the visuals obviously look just like botw, but it still looked fucking gorgeous at some points. like. man. they really went off to make it look not only faithful to botw as far as appearance goes, but also as far as capturing botw’s beauty and it was. excellent to see!

if anything is true to botw’s backstory, it’s definitely how op link is. cause he was established to be op in botw, & when u finish botw he is also op as hell. he is so fun to play as the higher leveled he gets. he absolutely kicks ass. especially with a two-handed weapon??? daaaaammmmnnn. thats my badass baby boy!!!!

link eating rocks not once, but TWICE. just showing PEAK gremlin energy. 10/10 for those scenes they were great

the ending was really beautiful actually and i did cry like a little baby for it what about it

things i didn’t like:

obviously first and foremost.. this is not the game we were advertised. and no matter how much i overall enjoyed the game, it will always have some layer of being tainted attached to it due to the false advertising. this is not the prequel we thought we’d be getting. & not using “prequel” specifically doesn’t matter when all the advertising, including the box art talks about this being the story of what happened 100 years ago. with no indication it wasn’t the story of what happened 100 years ago in the botw timeline, but a separate universe/timeline entirely. i do hope we get dlc for the game at some point giving us what we were advertised, but at the same time... rly wish that the story that’s in the final game was dlc, & the story we were promised was the original :/ or just having the game have two separate storylines originally would’ve been cool. i just wish it wasn’t falsely advertised. 

fort hateno can fucking eat my whole entire shit WHY is that part so needlessly obnoxious compared to everything else oh my god

being forced to fulfill revali’s power fantasy TWICE hurt my soul

fuck any mission where you have to protect the useless hylian guards. i hate them. they suck.

the ai for player characters when you aren’t playing as them can also be pretty useless. it was really frustrating failing missions because my fellow party members weren’t helping me, and i was basically expected to be in two places at once to get shit done myself. :/ ik you can just switch between characters to make it easier, but like. i like playing as link the most. he’s my favorite character, & ofc since he’s mandatorily played for most of the story, he’s gonna be the most leveled up character regardless so he’s just the best to play as in general especially for harder missions. it was annoying to be forced to play as other people Solely cause the ai was so useless.

king rhoam’s attempt at a redemption arc. i’m not sorry that i just fucking hate this man. i don’t mind him entirely in botw bc you can see clear, genuine remorse during the cut scene at the end of the great plateau. but the redemption arc he gets in this game? after all the fucking shit he does in this game? especially when after his ~redemption arc~ i had to sit through a cut scene of him being an absolute fucking asshole to baby zelda after her mother just died????? absolutely fuck that shit. i don’t appreciate that crap at fucking all. he’s a verbally abusive piece of shit and i hate his guts.

obviously there was gonna be some retconning of how certain things worked in botw in order to make this kinda game work but the way sheikah technology works in this game is so goddamn confusing i do not get it. the works of botw are never outright said or explained completely, but it’s straightforward enough that it doesn’t really matter. this game does try to explain certain things and it just becomes. really clunky and confusing very quickly. 

the story is alright, i guess, but..... really confusing/convoluted as hell at times to a point that it’s. really fucking distracting. especially in comparison to how straightforward botw’s story is. like..... cannot help but be annoyed that such a problem wouldn’t have been a thing if they stuck to botw’s story.

i was sad when the egg thing died but i dont like the egg thing.... it is the MAIN reason shit was retconned so much & i just. dont get its purpose. but i did really like the reveal that zelda made it herself. that was good shit!

also the egg glitched out like. a LOT. idk what the fuck was going on with the poor thing but there was multiple times during a cut scene or when i was just sitting there that it was freaking out in the background and it was rly weird

elemental overworld boss monsters................. obnoxious. especially elemental guardians like goddamn bro what the fuck

i know warriors’ games aren’t about exploring anyway but the limitations for exploring was really sad/frustrating. this is still somewhat the world of hyrule before the calamity, which is something we’ve always wanted to see. not being able to explore even the immediate area at certain points because of shit like timed missions was really upsetting, man. :( i just wanted to see hyrule castle Before the calamity why was did they have to rob us like that.....

creepy corrupted egg’s transformation. why. what was that. what the fuck

even though i did enjoy the boss fights, it did get. incredibly taxing eventually to have to fight the SAME bastards so many times. like yeah botw is also guilty of this with the blights, but goddamn.... at least i have a choice to avoid certain encounters with them? this game has you fighting the same bitches like upwards of 3-4 times. it was. really annoying tbh. like the fights themselves are enjoyable, but damn we added new characters and it still inevitably lacked variety in boss fights.

no playable kass >:( if he’s available later in dlc then fine but i wish he was playable in the original game. so many random choices you’d never expect are. why couldn’t he also be there >:(

overall:

it will forever have that sour taste for the false advertising attached to it unfortunately, but that aside, i overall did enjoy the game! i think it has a lot to love in spite of the issues i encountered. as someone who has this as their first warriors game as well, it did lend itself to letting me see the appeal of them. idk if i’ll get more, but i do get why they’re so beloved/popular now. it was an alright time, with some amazing highlights that i’m gonna think back on very fondly for a very, very long time. if i had to rate it..... 7/10 

[mothmansrevolt]

some doodles i did for my loz story (thats in the works, everything is planned i just gotta sit down and write. Below the cut is some of my jabbering on about them, spoilers if i ever write the fic. well not really spoilers but more background stuff and me talking bout the story in general. Not that important i just wanted it all somewhere.

Second pic is older! Mist fairies are actually fog fairies, specific to the foglands. They are savage to all those without a magic signature similar to foglanders and have teleportation abilities when in large groups. That is all i will say. Soruspiris are containers for souls. regular fairy looks fluffy and i don't know why... Zelda's doodle was just here because i wanted to draw her. She's a fallen angel I guess. IDK Link actually can hide a lot of spiris on him as well, especially in his hat. Alright, Iarta is the spirit of the Soul's Bane Blade (or Soul Stealer), or Link's main weapon. She has acted as a sort of caretaker and teacher besides Link's grandmother, who often travelled herself. Honestly I just wanted to draw Iarta and baby Link. This is in no means her final design. I've been struggling with what she looks like (and the other sword spirits for that matter), most of them look similar, specifically her, the Statue's End, and the Twin Blades. I thought she'd have a few different forms as she does mainly fight for Link in a physical sense but IDK. As for the embroidery on the cloak and sash, Link does hand embroidery, specifically small runes to add minimal enchantment to clothing for protection and other such things. Verin's sash has ones for I think it was protection and good luck? Link's are mainly weather protection and elemental protection as well as to prevent fog fairies from ripping it to shreds. Ganon is making an appearance because of another drawing I was doing and was trying to remember what he looked like (spoiler I still didn't know and just pulled up a pic. he's the most inconsistent looking character I'm so sorry. I'm trying to figure it out along with Zelda who is basically consistently changing appearances in the story anyway). His scar on his face would technically be from before the story occurred, since he's a trained fighter more than anything. Also in an older pic, the first one i posted of him, I'd like to note that those swords (i see now that they are sickles, im so sorry) are not his main ones. Spoiler but they break. He's supposed to weild the twin blades, not those. That picture is a goddamned mess cause he has the goddess's scars (don't question the name its what my notes say) and swords that are broken at that point. As well, he wouldn't be in the gerudo desert? So yeah. A mess. Alright, Koddila! My favorite bird mom! She's here because I need practice drawing ritos. Yeah i stuck with the botw esque design concept cause they're my favorite overall though I deviated from the consistent fashion in which rito dress in that game (i sat in that village and fucking studied those clothes. no joke). She's notably a warrior though so she has the shoulder thingies. Verin, the zora father Link did not want, probably did not need, but still got, is honestly here because I have never drawn a zora before and will never try again. He's supposed to be scarred and battle worn, having lived a tired life or something. He just wants Link to stop doing stupid stuff and almost getting himself killed, weird foglander magic be damned. Sorry for rambling. The story's outline is being edited right now. Specifically, i've summarized every chapter im going to write and am adding and taking details right now. My friend told me i could've made it multiple books if i wanted to explore more of the world, but at that point I made the story on a time crunch and I'm sad I did so. Souls of Power was originally designed as if I were concepting and creating a world for a video game, a map and everything. Hell, I'd even jokingly written out whistle mechanics for calling Spiris and directing them. The world has so much more in it that I'd be writing, from hidden places to cucco racing to the entirety of the damned foglands that Link barely explores. I'm trying to add more of the world into it, but we'll see what I can. I just know that Link's arc got really... well sad. I had to make it different because Link's ending wouldn't be that good at all. So when I publish it, just know Link wasn’t going to have a fun time, but he’s going to get a good ending

[changeling-rin]

Hi! I was wondering, what are your thoughts on the different Zelda games? Not a ranking or anything, just what did you like/dislike in each game/franchise as a whole? And how did you come up with the personalities of the characters for DL? Thank you!

Oof.  Oh, you’re gonna make me Longpost, aren’t you.  Yeah, okay.  You asked for it.

Skyward Sword/Gen 

-I both love, and hate, the motion controls.  On one hand, I have never felt more epic than when I personally stabbed my sword into Demise’s head.  On the other hand, I have never felt more frustrated when my wiimote would misinterpret my swings and I would subsequently die.  Contrary to popular opinion, I actually like Fi.  Her design is beautiful, her theme is gorgeous, and her goodbye to Link is one of the most beautiful yet heartbreaking moments in the entire franchise.  The origin of the Master Sword, in my opinion, might be one of the best things to come out of this game.

Gen’s personality came about mainly as the foil to Lore and Dusk’s pre-existing dynamic.  Lore is the spastic one, and while Dusk is definitely somewhat of the straight-man, he’s much more likely to roll with it unless it’s drastically damaging.  Gen, on the other hand, will avidly apply common sense to anything and everything, and since Lore very rarely follows common sense, Gen morphed into his ‘conscience’, so to speak.  His predilection for healing was a side-effect of me dying a lot in his game and spending more on Red Potion than probably anything else, and also because the group needed a medic and Gen was definitely the most take-charge character I had who would do that sort of thing.

Minish Cap/Speck

The Picori are the cutest things, oh my gosh.  I do, however, suspect their violent and painful end in BotW - if they’re the ones who put the Rupees and Bombs and stuff in the grass, and there’s no such things in BotW…  Aside from that!  I adored the concept of shrinking down and having the entire environment change on you.  It was such a unique way to make an old area new again.  On the flipside, I loathed the Kinstone sidequest with a passion.  I never did manage to match them all.

Speck was basically me saying to myself, ‘He’s a tiny person.  How do tiny people see the world?’  And then he turned into a quiet, shy kid who tries very hard not to be a bother and looks at problems from a completely different angle than most people.  This is why he always second guesses his words - he’s by far the most frequent user of ‘um’, ‘uh’, ‘ah’, ‘oh’, etc, and this is entirely on purpose.  Tiny people, by nature, will do whatever it takes to make sure the bigger people don’t get mad enough to smush them - a bit morbid, I know, but if you think about it…  This is also where his habit of stabbing the eardrum came from.  Where most people wouldn’t even think of it, Speck just saw a really good access point and a whole lot of convenient fabric handholds to get him there.  

Four Swords/The Four

I have actually never been able to get my hands on a copy of the original Four Swords game.  I know.  I’m a disgrace to the fandom.  However, I have done extensive research, and I can say that by far my favorite concept is being able to deploy a Bow-Wow in the direction of my enemies.  I literally cannot imagine it without cackling.  

The Four were the result of me having two sets of Four Sword Heroes and desperately needing some way to tell them apart.  It took a very long time for me to decide to play up the hive mind aspect, but once I did everything clicked for them.  Rather than being split individual aspects of the original Link, the Four are literally a copy-paste of OG Link’s personality with only tiny variations between them, which led to the decision to make them somewhat quiet and awkward about their synchronization.  People rarely accept what’s unfamiliar to them, and to be honest the Four probably have one of the more ‘tragic’ backstories.  They may or may not have been chased out of a town or two due to a couple misunderstandings about the source of their hive mind.  (My babies, I’m so sorry I did this to you I’m a terrible author whyyyyyyyy)

Ocarina of Time/Ocarina

By far, one of the most investing stories in a game.  Ganondorf is fabulously evil, 10/10 would thwart again.  Music, of course, is beautiful.  The travel mechanic, on the other hand, I am not a fan of.  Trying to get somewhere before getting the respective warping Song is tedious at best, and the sheer amount of time it takes for me to swap between Young and Adult Link is just… it’s a hassle, is what it is.  

Ocarina is a little kid in a Big Person’s body, and I write him accordingly.  He’s the wide-eyed boy in a brand-new world.  He’s naive to a lot of things and oblivious to several others.  He and Mask have a bit of an odd dynamic because of this - Ocarina will basically gravitate to wherever Mask is as a sort of unconscious instinct, under the unrealized assumption that Mask means protection.  The ‘Little Brother’ mentality, if you will.  

Majora’s Mask/Mask

THE MOON.  THE FREAKING MOON.  I will never be able to play this game without feeling vaguely stressed and unsettled the entire time and THAT FREAKING MOON is the reason why.  Very compelling plot, 10/10, but WHY.  Aside from that, the music is fantastic, Majora is Creepy To The Max and we so rarely get that in Zelda games so I am on board, the transformation masks are probably my favorite mechanic, and your heartstrings get yanked on several times with the Goron Lullaby quest and Mikau’s entire storyline.  

Mask evolved directly as the opposite to Ocarina, with the caveat that he is directly aware of Ocarina’s unconscious ‘Little Brother’ mindset - Mask just happens to be sincerely uncomfortable with the ‘Big Brother’ role.  He’s more knowledgable, more experienced, and this was done explicitly to be in direct contrast with the fact that he looks like a little kid.  He’s Ocarina’s opposite in every single way, and it’s fun to have them play off each other.

Twilight Princess/Dusk

Probably my favorite game, art-style-wise.  There’s some things that Twilight Princess does fantastically well artistically, not to mention that it contains one of my favorite characters of all time.  Midna is awesome and there’s nothing that will convince me otherwise.  I actually think the wolf mechanic is a really good way to make new problems within old areas - but I will admit, the bug hunts can be tedious.  And that one escort mission can go jump off a cliff. But I adore everything about the concept of a Twilight Realm, and even though Ganondorf comes in and kinda shafts Zant out of the way, he’s fabulous enough that I can accept it.  They are, after all, both marvelously evil.  

Dusk’s personality came from me thinking back on everything that happens in his game and promptly deciding that: he either went a little insane to deal with it all, or he had the lowest level of crap to give that I’d ever seen.  Obviously, I decided on the latter, and I’m very glad I did, because from there that allowed me to build the faux-duo-actually-triad leadership between him, Lore, and Gen that works so very well.  I kinda ended up putting a little of myself into Dusk, in that he’s very reserved and will think about what he says before saying it.  Of course, I had to incorporate the wolf somehow, and the way that was the most fun for me was to bring some of those traits over into his hylan form.  One of these was me interpreting the howling mechanic as Dusk being a naturally good singer, and we all know where that led.

Four Swords Adventures/Red, Blue, Green, and Vio

The loss of the Bow-Wow hits me deeply, but we do get horses so that helps a little.  Also, it surprised me a little how similar this game is to the predecessor, Four Swords.  There’s a couple plot differences, Shadow Link is a thing, but for the most part it follows a very similar pattern and I kinda wish something different had been done.  It’s fun having more than one weapon to swing around, but not quite as much without other people to play with.  The one thing I have to say about Zelda multiplayer games is that, without actual multiple players, it’s just… not as fun.

I freely admit that large parts of Green, Vio, Red, and Blue’s personalities came directly from the FSA manga - particularly, the subversion of color expectations by having Red be the timid one and Blue be the aggressive one.  You never see that nowadays, and I immediately pounced on it.  Vio and Green had slightly less large chunks of manga personality, but I basically ripped their inner-group dynamic wholesale.  Their individual interactions though, those are all me.  Blue and Vio just seemed like natural bicker partners.  Red’s Adorable Puppy face evolved out of the sheer amount of times the manga had him on the verge of, or shedding, actual tears.  And Green naturally needed to be the exasperated leader keeping them all in line.  It all just sorta flowed from there.

Link to the Past/Lore

The originator of such musical classics like Kakariko Village, the Dark World theme, and Zelda’s Lullaby, and I thank this game for making these songs so good.  I adore the way that the Dark World can take the entire freaking country of Hyrule and turn it into something completely new.  But there were some times where I wasn’t sure where to go?  I don’t know if it was me or not, and it could have been.  I might just be bad at inferring destinations.  

Lore is the direct result of being the target of four entire games, and me thinking to myself, ‘Now how does a normal person deal with something like that?’  The answer was, of course, that they throw normality out a window.  Lore is my way to have fun, and also to let out every random impulse I’ve ever had but never acted on.  In a way, Lore is me, but without all the inhibitions.  Sometimes he ends up being a direct conduit between my brain-thoughts and the page.  That aside, I also gladly seized the opportunity to bring something different to the group, which is how the different languages came in.  He’s the only Link who actively, within his games, visits other countries, and there was no way I could pass that up.  

Oracle of Ages/Oracle of Seasons

They remind me of Pokemon titles.  “Here’s these two games!  With the exception of some minor details, they’re exactly the same!  Combine them for a special surprise!”  I do think the Subrosians are adorable though.  And of course, shout-out to Veran, the only explicitly female villain the Zelda franchise has ever seen.  Maybe someday you’ll get a friend to help you out in that testosterone-filled mess.  Maybe someday. 

Link’s Awakening

Far sadder than I anticipated it being.  Also, the Bow-Wow returns!  Clearly the best thing in the game. On the bad side - I don’t remember which one it was - there was this one dungeon that just… for the life of me I could not get it to make sense in my brain.  I don’t know why.  I also don’t remember what the solution was.  Very engaging story though, the Windfish mystery kept me engaged right up to the Big Reveal.

A Link Between Worlds/Sketch

The painting mechanic is just.  It’s so clever.  The entire landscape is transformed with a single dimension shift and I loved it.  I was kinda skeptical about the same map as LttP, but then Lorule happened and I was pleased enough with that to accept it.  Ravio and Hilda are fine additions to the LoZ family and I wholeheartedly accept them - also, the Lorule Castle theme is one of the best songs in the franchise, fight me.  One thing I do remember is this one boss battle, I think with some sort of Manhandla plant?  It took me at least ten or so tries to get past that thing.  Really didn’t enjoy that one.

Everything intentional about Sketch evolved from his painting ability, this being his phobia of water, his tendency to use stealth in a confrontation, and his continued sidetracking with artistic ideas.  At some point though, he turned into one of the most sarcastic Links in the bunch, and I’m really not sure how it happened.  But it seemed to fit him for whatever reason.

The Legend of Zelda/Realm

I regrettably have not been able to get my hands on this one either, but I have watched a play-though.  My observations are as follows:                    Where is the map.  How did anyone figure out where they were going in this game.  I don’t understand how that wall was supposed to indicate it was bomb-able.  How did people play this game without getting too frustrated to continue.                                                                                       On the bright side, the dungeons seemed to be very well-laid-out, and the bosses, while repetitive, were pretty memorable.  I suspect I would get lost within the first ten minutes, though.

Realm is directly based off of my above observations.  I am firmly of the opinion that absolutely nobody can make it through the original LoZ game without getting lost at least once, and this resulted in Realm’s absolutely abysmal sense of direction.  Consequently, I made him hopelessly optimistic and cheerful enough to make the sun jealous, because the only person who could put up with those sorts of mishaps is the person who can just get right back up and keep going.  Also, the fact that I myself and severely directionally challenged means that writing Realm comes very easily.

The Adventure of Link

I have not played this one either.  I apologize.  That said, I dislike the switch from top-down to 2-D scroller.  In comparison with literally every other game in the franchise, AoL feels the least like a ‘Zelda’ title.  Though, for the invention of Shadow Link, I award at least few points.

Wind Waker/Wind

It’s adorable.  It’s somehow a very dark and serious game disguising everything behind a cute and cartoony art style and even though I can recognize it I don’t actually care.  The story is engaging, Tetra is the Best Pirate, and the ocean makes it feel so big.  I do think the sailing mechanic can be a bit time-consuming before the warp travel kicks in, and I actually feel like Ganondorf went down too easily, maybe?  

Wind is based off of sailing, basically.  I took the amount of time it takes him, in-game, to get places and decided that he has the patience of a saint.  Also the bafflingly ability to stay awake for three days straight, but that hasn’t come up in DL, so.  Because of this, he’s usually pretty content to let conversations evolve without much input from him, unless he’s got something important to say.  And of course, he’s got the Wind Waker, which resulted in me making up an entire magical classification system to explain why he’s so good at controlling the weather, accompanied by an entire chapter-length head canon about the relation between the weather and music.  Ironically enough, for all that Wind has no instrument of his own, the fact that he’s a conductor means he’s actually the most musically talented of the whole group.

Phantom Hourglass

I wouldn’t call it a worthy sequel to Wind Waker, but I honestly don’t think it’s too bad - with the exception of the Temple of the Ocean King.  First time, it was kinda fun.  Second time, less fun,  Third time, getting repetitive.  Fourth time, getting annoying.  Fifth time, and I was really done with that mechanic.  The remixed Sailing Theme was good though, and once I got past Linebeck’s surface personality I liked him pretty well too.

Spirit Tracks/Steam

I have never played this one, but the concept seems fun.  The riding-a-train song is amazing.  This Zelda is probably the most fleshed-out that the character has ever been, and I dearly hope she can take the position of ‘companion guide’ again someday.  Or maybe even ‘protagonist’, who knows?  I do dislike how vague Malladus is, because as the Final Bad Guy I feel like he should have been solidified more than just “Demon sealed a long time ago”.  And to be honest, why Trains?  It just seems so random.  

Steam, like several other Links, is based around his gameplay.  As an engineer, he’s a pretty hands-on type of person, which is why he frequently gets distracted with the inner workings of other Links’ items.  And due to the fact that Trains require very little input to control and a lot of travel time, he’s the least physical of all of them.  This basically means that he runs the slowest, hits the lightest, and will likely bring the least to the table in a fight.  This is one of the reasons I gave him the ‘I Like Trains’ summon, because even if he himself can’t hit very hard, his Train sure as heck can. 

Oh my gosh I think this took me a solid hour to type out, I hope you’re very happy with this response Anon ;)

[kriscynical]

Retropalooza 2018

So as already stated, Bree and I went to Retropalooza this weekend and had an absolute blast as always. This was our third year to go, and we love this con to bits. It’s practically in my backyard, only 20 minutes away from my house. It’s big enough to have good guests and a sizable dealer’s room, but still small enough to be fun. I dread the day when that happy medium finally gets tipped because of growth. You always want a con to be successful but... you know. 

As a side note, if the con you are running is for retro gaming and started out as a swap meet, if you’re suddenly going to ban screwdrivers at the door, perhaps you should mention that on your website beforehand? Seeing as how screwdrivers are... you know... the only way to definitely check the authenticity of retro game carts? That way your attendees won’t have to sprint back out to their cars in 10000% humidity in end-of-September-in-Texas heat. Just a suggestion, guys. 

But anyway.

I don’t talk about it much on this blog, but I follow a lot of gaming YouTubers. I’m not as religious about it as some people are, but I enjoy listening to gaming content while I’m working, especially letsplays. Retropalooza always has several YouTubers I follow as guests, which adds to the fun factor. This year’s guests that Bree and I were into were Jirard and Alex of Super Beard Bros and The Completionist, Norman Caruso of The Gaming Historian, James Rolfe of The Angry Video Game Nerd, and Arlo. Every single one of them are super nice, although AVGN being there this year caused a bit of bullshit to happen which I’ll detail in a little bit.

I have a little third party NES/SNES console, the RetroDuo, which I’ve had my favorite YouTubers sign for the last three years, all at this con. It’s usually displayed on one of the bookshelves in my studio. This year’s additions were Arlo and James Rolfe. It’s pretty full now:

This is long because of several photos from meet and greets as well as my Zelda haul from the dealer’s room, so...

Arlo! I just discovered his channel over the spring and this was conveniently the first year for him to be at Retropalooza. His content is really fun, and I always look forward to his reactions and discussions to Nintendo Directs and E3. His reaction to the E3 Metroid Prime 4 teaser reveal in particular was priceless.

I’ve met Norman in years past, so we just went to his panel this year. His panels are usually a live version of a Gaming Historian episode along with some Q&A and a little game show based on information from his videos. His live episode was on Punch-Out. He usually does Jeopardy! as the game format, but this time he changed it up to Who Wants to be a Millionaire?... and the lady he picked out of the audience to participate didn’t know the answer to a single damn question. I don’t know why she even raised her hand, because it wasn’t like he even asked anything difficult in the first few questions! If you watched his videos even once you’d know the answers. Bree and I were frustrated because we probably could have gotten to the million dollar question. >:\

Later in the day was AVGN’s panel, and that’s where the bullshit comes in. From the time we first got to the con on Saturday Bree and I noticed that it was way more crowded than usual, enough to get her anxiety going. AVGN doesn’t make a whole lot of convention appearances, so obviously the uptick in attendance was due to him. The people who run this con know gaming, particularly on YouTube since all of their guests are YouTubers. They should have known AVGN was going to attract hoards of people. Did they prepare for that? Of course not. 

Bree and I go to the panel room he’s scheduled to be in 15 minutes before the previous panel ends, and we get our seats. Jirard’s Completionist panel is scheduled right after AVGN in the same room, so we plan to camp out for a little while. 

Right as the previous panel is ending con staff announces that AVGN has been moved to main events, and everybody exits in one mass trying to get over to main events as quickly as possible. We ended up stuck in a massive line that snaked down the hallway and back, and before we know it it’s 1:15... 15 minutes past when the panel was supposed to start. So now we know that if we get IN to this panel, we’re going to have to miss a good chunk of it because for both of us it’s more important to see Jirard’s panel than AVGN. We’re also afraid that AVGN’s panel running over is just going to decimate Jirard’s numbers. 

Con staff comes back and says there won’t be enough chairs for everyone but there’s basically unlimited standing room, which isn’t great for me or my back. They then ask if anybody has a condition that won’t allow them to stand for an entire panel, and I raise my hand. I tell them I had back surgery a few months ago and they say okay, we’ll get you a chair. Which they did. Once they started letting people in they pulled Bree and I out of line and escorted us to two chairs behind the back row, one for me and one for her since she was with me. 

She proceeds to post this to her Snapchat:

This was what the room looked like when the panel started, at 1:25:

We still can’t believe the con didn’t anticipate this. This was the dealer’s room. Meaning the acoustics sucked ass. We couldn’t understand a single thing that was being asked or answered, nor could most of the people in the back of the room. As a result, several people left within the first 10 minutes (and the overall crowds at the con dropped like a ROCK after that panel was over, thank god!). At about 1:45 we gave up and left, too, to go grab seats for Jirard’s Completionist panel, which worked out well because we got front row. Thankfully the room was mostly full by the time the panel started, too.

The Completionist panel was the best of the weekend that we attended, imo. Bree and I were smiling and laughing through the whole thing because it was just that much fun. He had nothing planned because he’d been in Japan until a couple days before that, so it was just a laid back Q&A. He called on both of us to ask questions, and my question (“Given what you just said about Sleepy Jirard, would you say it’s a cure for Jirard Syndrome?”) got quite a bit of an audience reaction as well as a reaction from him, followed by “That was a good question.” with a laugh after he answered. Bree and I hope we can find video of this panel on YouTube soon.

After his panel we went back to the dealer’s room and found him and Alex at their guest table, they recognized us from years past (“Oh hey, guys!”), we chatted for a bit, took pictures, and I gave both of them some little goodies I’d made based on the Kaizo episodes of Super Beard Bros:

These are buttons Bree wanted of the designs I made. I gave both Alex and Jirard keychains of “Ladies and Gentlemen: The Bullet”, then gave Alex “The Goochy” and Jirard “This is not how I end”. They both liked them a LOT and Alex said he was going to put the bullet on his keys, which made me ridiculously happy. These will be available at next year’s A-Kon. 

Before we left for the day on Saturday we saw that the line for AVGN wasn’t too bad, so we decided to give it a shot for autographs and pictures. Thankfully it only took about ten minutes to get through the line, and even though the con had fucked up his panel royally, James was super nice when we got to meet him.

I didn’t realize he had made that face until I saw the picture afterwords. If I had known, I would have made a face, too, dammit! >:\

On Sunday we brought along my mom so she could 1) see what a retro gaming con was like since she’d only been to anime cons, and 2) see the Beard Bros panel/meet them because I had gotten her into their channel over the summer via the Kaizo videos. I introduced her to them separately since they were each talking to different people, and when I said “I recently got her into Super Beard Bros” both of them independently said “I’m sorry” as a response without having heard the other do so. lol 

I’m posting this picture again because I love it. Y’all can deal with it. You’ve read this far.

I had printed out a shot of the Beard Bros title card so my mom could get it signed, and she did. She said she thoroughly enjoyed herself at the con, and I’m hoping she can come out on Sunday next year, too. She bought an NES cart of Classic Concentration, a game that she and I played together on my NES all the time when I was a kid. I wish they’d bring it back on TV because it was a good game show, dammit. 

My Zelda Haul:

The three game box covers are mounted on 1/2″ foam core and I plan to hang them over the TV in my studio since that’s where all of my retro gaming stuff is set up. The BotW box art is layered 3D cutout in a shadow box frame. The Hylian Shield is a new pillow to add to my gaming chair. Not pictured: a Sheik Amiibo that the seller gave me a good price on after some haggling, and a replacement gold Wii remote to replace the one the batteries destroyed a couple months ago. I got that for a really good price, too, from a different seller. He was selling it as a bundle with Skyward Sword, and I of course didn’t need the game. 

“Will you sell this by itself?”

“I was selling it as a bundle, but sure.”

“How much?”

“What will you offer me?”

“Uh... I dunno? I don’t know what it’s going for online right now.”

Bree said, “I’ll check.” and pulled out her phone. I had only seen it in one game shop here in Arlington for $80 and hadn’t tried looking online yet. She turned her phone to the guy and said “On eBay it’s going for anywhere from $45 to $82.”

So then the guy says to me again, “Okay. So what will you offer me?”

“$50?”

“Cash?”

“Yep.”

“Done.”

Yaaaaaaas.

THIS THING is the crown jewel of my haul and I love it to pieces. Guh. I picked it up on Saturday.

Just LOOK AT IT. I bought it from the same seller as the Sheik Amiibo, and I referred to it as “my baby” for the rest of the day and carried it in front of me in its box quite proudly. I had several people tell me it was badass and that was satisfying. Every time I had to get into my backpack for something I told Bree, “Hold my baby.” before handing it over. 

I think I got him for a great price, too. After reaching a deal on Sheik I asked the guy how much the figure was, and he said $100 but asked what I would offer for it. He’d had it up on eBay but pulled it after a week because it wasn’t selling. I’ve only seen it for $110-120+ online, but I went ahead and tried to haggle some more because why the hell not. I asked if he’d do $80, then he asked if I’d do $90 because he gave me a good deal on Sheik (he really did... $10 off of his asking price which was almost a third total!), and I agreed. He said that made him happy because he’d rather the figure go to me “because it looks like you’ll take care of the box” to which I told him yes, of course, I keep all of my boxes in a safe place, and his buddy said “That’s the way to do it!!”. 

And that’s that. I spent the most money this year of any year before now, but I don’t regret a cent of it. Especially on my baby. Bree and I already can’t wait for next year!

[vampgirl]

SO disappointed in the botw trailer honestly. The sky stuff is cool, I will give them this. Do not know what I even expected after they decided to put Skyward Sword on the switch, they might even play into that lore in this game.

But adding sky islands does nothing to the og map!!! Why would they keep the same map for this if you’re going to be in the sky?? I don’t feel like the two compare at all. Why on earth would I fuck around on a map I’ve already spent hundreds of hours on if there’s sky land above me? And what point will there even be to go down in the first place? Unless the sky area is just for a more dungeon/shriney experience, but that would mean that once you’re done there there’s almost no reason to stay.

Anyways what I wanted was underground + underwater exploration. I want this to be a changed hyrule, at least a few years on from the last game. Enough time has passed that the effort Zelda’s been putting into rebuilding has really started to blossom. There’s new towns and villages, and the existing ones from the old game have been expanded upon, with more/bigger shops, new npcs, etc. Maybe now that the calamity’s been defeated new species of plants and animals have sprung up or come back to land now that there isn’t a massive evil pig cloud fucking shit up.

And THEN you add whatever happens with the castle into mix. I’m totally fine with it going into the sky, works perfectly with my plan. Maybe the game starts you off on the ground, you’re free to roam and explore as you please. Doing side quests and stuff. Hopefully they expand on the side quests and add side-quest lines. But at some point you go have to go visit Zelda at the castle, she found something mysterious, blah blah falling blah blah ganon blah blah.

Whatever the two of you find causes the castle to rise up into the sky, taking huge chunks of hyrule up with it. These chunks left behind fill with water or expose massive caves and tunnels (maybe even exposing a city). The new cities now have pieces missing, important landmarks from the first game have now been changed, and falling chunks of land have further marred the landscape.

You now have the ability to swim underwater. Maybe it’s available from the start, but now you have somewhere to GO. Traverse through caves and tunnels that are partially filled with water. You can upgrade your air capacity as well as stamina, making it harder for things like climbing to get too easy and therefore boring quite as fast. There’s dungeons, new enemies, new shrines. SUNKEN shrines. New underground and underwater biomes. Villages and cities underground, maybe another sheikah village, the only place they felt they could be safe or study in piece or whatever, gorons obv are perfect here, and another zora village where they’re more inspired by deep deep sea creatures. Axolotl zora anyone? Some kind of hugeass cavern with a settlement of Bat-Rito. Like the possibilities are fucking endless.

And I still think the sky is a good idea! The same stuff can all be applied there, but I feel like it’s on a way smaller and more limited scale. Adding in the sky land stuff or whatever ADDS to the world but it doesn’t change it, and if they don’t find a way to change it (drastically) then what point is there for players to go back down? I know people with over 600 hours on that game. And while that isn’t the norm, at the end of the day exploring the world for the very first time was what made the first game. The awe and wonder of simply discovering something, like literally who needs crack. You know who doesn’t? The me from 2019 who played botw for the first time.

Oh and also let us play as Zelda like obviously. Fucking obviously Nintendo you stupid ass baby company. Zelda is stuck on the ground trying to figure things out while link does sky adventures. Obviously she wouldn’t have planned for this playing as her starts you out with little to nothing, putting you in a similar position to the main game. Give her the sheikah slate this time but with her big girl brain she tweaks it or something idfk. She can use magic. You can switch between the two at will and in order to progress on each side you need to unlock stuff for each other, and when you beat it you can play either one at will like this is so simple.

And yes I know that if tiny brained little money grubbing mr nintendos decide to let us play as Zelda it will be locked behind a dlc paywall but this is MY dream botw 2. Anyways wish I knew how to put a link in this for continued reading or whatever on mobile sorry it’s so long ^-^ if you read this far then wow... wow but also talk to me about it <33333 thanks for coming 2 my Ted talk