#breaking news: ace discovers their first OTP

[suffersinfandom]

I’m still thinking about dumb discourse because my brain is broken and guys there’s so much “Ed and Stede are not as queer as Izzy” out there what the heck. 

Anyway. I said this in response to a different post:

There are so many ways to be queer and so many kinds of queer experiences. Not everyone is going to see themselves in Ed or Stede, and that's fine. Some people are going to see themselves in Izzy, and that's also fine. What's not fine is asserting that your pet white guy (who, yes, conforms to pirate standards of masculinity better than anyone else on the Revenge) is the only character with a valid queer arc.

But why do some Izzy fans (can we call them Izzy Heads? Izheads? I want a word for that specific flavor of fan) relate only to the queerness in Izzy's story? I can't stop thinking about it.

It seems that at least some people who consider Izzy the best example of queer rep in OFMD do so because they relate to the character. They don’t have a romantic partner or they’re in love with someone who doesn’t feel the same way. They’re disabled and focus on the intersection of disability and queerness. They feel as though they’re outsiders, even in a queer community (or a largely queer fandom like this one). They’re not cis men and they’re not trans in the same way as Jim is, so they don’t see their gender explicitly represented onscreen. 

On paper, most of that describes me too. The thing is? I do relate to Stede and Ed and I don’t relate to Izzy at all.

I’m an AFAB nonbinary person who’s physically and mentally disabled. I’m aromantic and asexual with the sliders all set to 100%; I have never so much as dated, and I almost never engage with romantic media because I just don’t get it. I feel like a freak in most circles, like I’m missing a fundamental part of what makes humans human. There isn’t a character in OFMD who shares my specific gender or sexual identity, but Ed and Stede are absolutely queer in ways that are understandable to me and, I think, a lot of other people in this community.

Ed and Stede both grow up and live the first decades of their adult lives in societies that don’t want them to be themselves. Stede can’t love flowers or bright and flashy fashion; he needs to dress down and become a family man. He’s forced to marry a woman he doesn’t love (and who doesn’t love him) and father children to inherit his wealth. Ed can’t fancy a fine fabric or pursue a peaceful life because his world is one that demands cruelty and violence. He has to wrap himself up in leather and layers of myth and legend to survive. They’re both GNC and wearing masks and entirely miserable.

I know -- I think most of us know -- what it’s like to suppress who we are so we can fit in or be who the people around us expect us to be. I think we know what it’s like to be miserable and lonely for ages -- to bury who we really are deeper and deeper until we barely remember who that person is -- right up until we find out that there are people out there who get us. There are places where we can be who we are, or at least experiment a bit and discover ourselves.

Even if we don’t know what it’s like to find a great love like Stede and Ed do, there are parts of their relationship that we understand. I'm sure plenty of us know what it’s like to meet someone who doesn’t ask us to pretend for the first time. We know what it’s like to be on the same silly, stupid wavelength as someone else, and we know how it feels to play with someone who gets us. I think that the friendship that Ed and Stede share, even with the romantic and sexual elements removed, is a distinctly queer one. 

So I guess I still don't know why Izheads only relate to his queer experience when Ed and Stede, in my opinion, are both extremely queer even beyond, like, the thing where they're wildly in love.

I want to think it has something to do with Izzy's status as a side character and not racism, internalized homophobia, or anything else like that. Characters without fully fleshed-out backgrounds provide opportunities to project whatever we want, you know? If you want to see your specific gender or sexual identity in a character, just grab one with little canon lore and fill in the blanks. Maybe I can be happy with characters who aren't just like me, but I don't expect everyone to be content with that.

What was I even typing about?

Oh, right.

Ed and Stede are super fucking queer. You don't have to relate to them because there are infinite ways to be queer, but you do have to acknowledge that there is nothing heteronormative about their relationship or them as individuals.

[itsmemateinnit]

2023 fic summary

This year was a record year for me in terms of the amount of fics I posted, so I thought I'd do like last year and post a summary here :)

2023 Year of the OTP fics:

Title: Whenever I look at you... Summary: Snapshots of Chandler observing Kent through the years Word count: 2409

Title: The Roll of the Sea Summary: Despite merfolk being a folktale, Kent is convinced he saw one, and he becomes fixated on finding it again. Word count: 4928

Title: For Honour Summary: Kent is compelled to defend Chandler from his mean dinner partners. Word count: 3061

Title: A Budding Relationship Summary: Kent thinks he and Chandler have been on a date. Chandler doesn't. Word count: 2501

Title: For Dog's Sake Summary: An unplanned addition to the household puts a strain on Chandler and Kent's relationship. Word count: 5440

Title: April showers bring May flowers Summary: Chandler and Kent get stuck at a bus stop during a heavy downpour. Chandler let's something slip that he shouldn't have. Word count: 5516

Title: In the Middle of Nowhere With You Summary: Their car breaks down leaving Chandler and Kent stranded on an empty road surrounded by fields Word count: 3038

Title: The Time We Never Had Summary: "He hadn’t even left yet, and Kent hungered for more company. He hadn’t realised how starved for human connection he’d been until this very moment where the stories of people trapping someone for company suddenly made sense to him." Word count: 8513

Title: Take Care Summary: Kent takes charge so Chandler doesn't work himself to death. The team helps. Word count: 2445

Title: An Ace Epiphany Summary: Miles can no longer look at Chandler giving Kent hearteyes, but when he confronts him about it, it leads to Chandler discovering something about himself. Word count: 3210

Title: Harmonious Summary: Chandler joins the band as their new manager Word count: 10946

Title: Squire's Quest Summary: Kent goes on a daring quest to rescue sir Chandler from the arch devil Iver Word count: 8202 (A choose your own adventure inspired by the fighting fantasy books)

Other fics I wrote throughout the year:

Title: Here's a Health to the Company Summary: Joe finally gets to meet Emerson's best friends from uni. Word count: 8192

Title: Break Summary: Kent gets abducted and the team has 5 days to find him before it's too late. Word count: 7810 (A remake of my first Whitechapel fic)

Title: Guardian Angels Summary: Kent is captured by the Krays as revenge for Jimmy's "boy" disappearing Word count: 4861 (First fic I've written as part of a gift exchange)

[spacerhapsody]

Tag game: Answer these questions, then tag 9 people you want to get to know better.

@writingowl1985 tagged me, and in the spirit of New Year's resolutions and everything I actually didn't save this as a draft and forgot about it for 5 to 50 business days for once. Anyways, thank youuu 💜

3 ships: Luffy/Zoro (One Piece), Adam/Vincent (Polizeiruf), and the never-ending Dean/Castiel hell :')

and I accidentally got back into Marco/Ace (One Piece) a couple of days ago (get yourself an OTP where one half died 10 years ago and the other one is such a minor character that he shows up/is mentioned about twice per decade)

First ship: Good question. I was convinced it was one of the 1000 anime ships that happened around the same time, and low-key it probably was Yamato/Sora from Digimon (I still see them together at some point, but not as endgame anymore), but I just looked up the timing and the first one I was really intense about might actually have been Buffy/Spike from BtVS?

(And then I discovered you can also ship gay non-canon ships and it was OVER, lmao)

Last movie: Poltergeist (the 1982 version, actually for the first time, and while I was very disappointed on the horror front, I really want more families portrayed like this again. They actually have fun together and genuinely seem to like each other?? Wild.)

Last song: Here to Mars - Coheed and Cambria (that Marco/Ace fanmix is going to be the END of me)

Currently reading: The Science of Cooking by Stuart Farrimond, and I finally picked up Greywarren by Maggie Stiefvater again today, after I've put reading more than the first few pages of that one off for months now because I'm afraid I won't like it, and that would kind of break my heart because Ronan Lynch is my son.

Currently watching: One Piece (only about 200 more episodes until I'm up to date!!)

Currently consuming: uuh water?

Currently craving: a proper vacation. Also, after I had access to one over the holidays, a fancy bathroom, this was so nice :'))

tagging (as always, feel free to ignore this if you don't want to/have already done this): @hazelestelle, @haemoglobinheights, @digimochi, @mscalifornication, the next goddamn spam/porn blog that follows me because jfc

[plaggioclase]

Master of disguise (2019)

Exposition

Canon basis

Adrien feels stifled, unable to let loose when not Cat Noir, but even CN still has responsibility.

Nino wants adrien to be free.

Marinette has a massive, useless crush on Adrien.

Marinette may be willing to consider others, mainly CN, if not for AA.

Adrinette is alya’s OTP.

Canon divergent details

Possibile derivations of the name Sacha:

Sacha brain cohen

Middle name alexandre

Tf2 heavy minigun

Some anime character

Does it matter?

Nino works in an electronics store

Marinette is about fed up with the crush

Alya has started hinting at alternatives.

It’s summer break.

Inciting incident

Adrien dons a punk disguise and goes out in public. (In preparation he also gets a new phone case)

AA takes the metro, first to surprise/test Nino (and get a 2nd SIM card), then get food and go home

Nino doesnt recognize him

On his way back, alya boards

She meets AA’s new alter ego, believes “Sacha” is cn

AC somehow gets his phone number for marinette.

Rising action

S meets M at AC urging. M takes a shining, AA goes along with it

AA continues to loiter at N store

S and M go out more frequently. M’s love grows. She suspects he is CN. Does not consider AA.

AA”just a friend” in full force.

CN about to detransform after akuma, LB thinks it’s ok but it’s really not. LB reveals herself in process

Nino discovers AA=S. Mind blown. Good laugh.

Climax

???

School resumes, sharing about holiday, M mentions new boyfriend [S]

AA Who didnt realize they’re dating puts it together, loses his shit inside.

AA,N panicked strategizing for reveal.

M,AC know something is up but don’t know what

Denouement

The disguise still serves its original purpose

M and N have the whole picture, ac gets it later

M/AA figure out how to manage dating life as celebrity with no privacy

Plot threads:

Adrien disguise saga

Disguise works

Disguise goes too far

Friends find out (S=cn AC,m,n; s=aa n,m,ac?)

Disguise becomes insider knowledge

AA/M romance

M gives up on AA, meets and dates S without his knowledge, discovers S=AA,

Does M want the world to know her as AA’s girlfriend? Prob NG

Continue with S/M but with truth known to each. AA’s personality integrates.

Some time later, saga becomes public?

[laulink]

Diana for character ask

1. Fight them or fight for them

Fight FOR her ! I love my baby girl <3

2. On a scale from 1-10 how excited do I get when I see them

10. I love her, as I already said, and seeing her appear on screen usually means hints for the plot, character development, or Akko going feral. Sometimes it’s a mix of two or three of those things.

3. Would I smooch/date/etc

Definitely smooch, but I don’t think we’d be compatible on a romantic novel (probably too alike for it to really work). As a one night stand though ? Smash, no questions asked.

4. Do I write for them

Yup ! I was in med school when the anime came out so I didn’t have much time to write for her, but I did write a couple stories with her playing a more or less important role. Some of those were requests for stories with her and Lotte dating and it’s rare for me to multiship, but Dialotte is one of the cutest, purest pairings EVER and I think I love it almost as much as I love Diakko.

5. Their defining color (color I most associate with them)

Blue (the person who made that list of questions didn’t expect it to be used for anime characters I guess).

6. My nickname(s) for them

Aside from the generic baby girl that I use for all the female characters who are not obviously older than me ? I don’t really have one. Maybe Princess (because I know that’d piss her off =P)

7. Something I have in common with them

I am very curious, I love to read, I used to want to live up to familial precedents and expectations before finding my own path, I used to want to be a doctor (hence med school)... I could probably find one or two more things, but that’s already more than the question required.

8. Song I associate with them

Still no song in mind for anyone, sorry.

Maybe “Wait for it” from Hamilton, the musical, since I can imagine Diana relating to Aaron Burr, but being more reasonable and less jealous than him when Akko turns out to be the one who will achieve Diana’s lifelong dream of seeing magic being returned to the world.

9. Who do I ship them with (and type of ship ex. Romantic or brotp)

I ship her with Akko, it’s my OTP, but as I said before, I also ship her with Lotte. 

I don’t really have a BroTP for her, but I like to imagine she’d get quite close to the other members of teams red and green through different means and would still be great friends with her own teammates. I don’t remember if I posted it on Tumblr, but even if I did, it was years ago, so I’ll say it again : I like to imagine the teams combining into three different groups based on their general personalities and interests, giving us Akko, Amanda and Hannah hanging out because they’re all pretty high energy so they’d be the only ones able to keep up with the others and the red heads could probably drag Akko into playing pranks on other people ; Diana, Barbara and Lotte as the litterature club (I think Diana would have a genuine interest in Barbara and Lotte’s favourite book series, at first at least), with Diana sometimes switching with Jasminka, who brings sweets to the litterature club meetings, while Diana goes with Sucy and Constanze to experiment on some things (though she is more than a little put out by Sucy’s ethics and always makes sure to check her tea before taking a single sip).

10.I dea for an imagine/fanfic for them (if I have one)

*Looks at the 23 pages long Word Document of fic titles and outlines I wrote down when in med school with no time to actually write and post them* Where. To. Start.

Well, my main one and probably the only I could ever get around to actually writing would have to be about Diana meeting her other parent. To make a long story short, Bernadette was dating a girl for a few years and they wanted to get married, but then Bernadette realised her family’s financial situation was Shit(TM) and the only way to save it would be to marry another noble who could support her family. She finds a nice aro/ace guy who is tired of his family trying to force him to marry and they agree to get married together so they could both get what they wanted. But Bernadette had to break things off with the woman she loved for multiple reasons and ended up not telling her she was pregnant with her kid for the same multiple reasons.

Fast forward 18 years later, Diana is in her second year at Luna Nova and a new teacher starts working there and guess who it is ? THAT’S RIGHT ! Bernadette’s ex-girlfriend ! She’s spent 18 years away from England because it was too painful to come back, but after seeing Diana and Akko blow the missile on TV, she decided to confront her old demons and came back to Luna Nova.

So the story would focus on how Diana and her mom meet, learn to appreciate each other’s company, discover they’re related and grow into their new relationship as mother and daughter. Would also include a Daryl redemption because, in that AU, This Woman Went Through Some Shit and is actually not all that bad, so at the end of the day, Diana would have a loving girlfriend, (living) mother and aunt and the rest of their lives would be very happy.

[jupitermelichios]

Jupiter’s Top 10 Fic Series of the Decade

In no particular order (and belonging to no particular fandom)

Honourable Mentions: Of Hunters & Hellblazers by KittyAug - Self Help by maskedfangirl - Bad Jokes by hahaharley - Doubtful Sanity by DustToDust - Wilton’s Bakery ‘Verse by machine_dove & sproings -  Sic Gorgiamus Allos Subjectatos Nunc by etothepii - New Favourite F Word by Polaris - little beasts by noctiphany & likewinning

drawn into something by Nonymos (Venom, Eddie/Venom, Dan/Anne, Eddie/Venom/Dan/Anne)

“Eddie, you… and him.”

“Yeah.” Eddie stares at the floor. “And… and look, Annie, I know it’s weird, but I can explain, I…”

His voice breaks, he’s damn near tearing up, panic rising again—and he jumps when Anne cups his face.

“Hey, it’s—it’s all right, Eddie.” She’s making a valiant effort to smile. “Don’t get so worked up. I’m not gonna run screaming.”

“No?” He laughs and sniffs. “Damn. Starting to wonder what it’s gonna take, at this point.”

This is not Nonymos’s only entry on this list. In fact they may just be my favourite fanfic author of all time. Drawn into something is everything everything I want from a Venom sequel, emotional, kinky, romantic, and poly.

OTP: Fight Club by MorganOfTheFey (Detroit: Become Human, RK900/Gavin)

"One hundred. Ten X," Nines says, voice flat enough it almost doesn't sound like bragging. "I would have been decommissioned otherwise."

"Ohhhh. Aw, that's sad. Just," She tries to snap her fingers and gets distracted for a moment when she can't. "Jus'like that?"

"Yeah RK, that's so sad," Gavin echoes. "Can you play yourself despacito?"

His own phone blares the song barely a second later. Gavin drops a few f-bombs fumbling to get it out of his jacket pocket and turn it off. Then as soon as he puts it back in his pocket, it starts up again.

"Thank you for the suggestion, detective," RK900 says. "This is making me feel better."

The fourth part of this is still coming out, and it’s the highlight of my week when the new chapter drops.

Dreams of the Waking Man by Lex_Munroe (Marvel Comics, Wade/Cable, Daken/Bullseye, Wade & Hope)

All at once, it hurts.  It hurts worse than the day Nate died (because Wade couldn’t accept it back then, insisted that Nate had managed to timeslide out, that the busted old telemetry circuit would only let him go forward and he was just lost for a little while).

He sits in the middle of the floor, ducks his head, cries.

She was smarter than he was—than he is.  She’d known all along.  Brave girl.

Timesliding doesn’t work right on Wade, never has, and their cobbled-together sliding module barely had power to take one stringy teenager for one jump.

She’d known she was leaving her parents, that she certainly wouldn’t see one of them again and quite possibly wouldn’t see the other.

Wade allows himself a moment more for grief and shame and humility.  Then he clears his throat and wipes his eyes and gets back to work.

This may be the cleverest fic I’ve ever read. Crossovers, theoretical physics, and the best love story Marvel never wrote.

The Mountains Are The Same by bonehandledknife & Primarybufferpanel (Mad Max: Fury Road, Furiosa/Max, Furiosa/Ace, Everyone & Healthy Coping Mechanisms)

“'Real isn’t how you are made’” Gilly said with the air of a quote, of a Remembering, “'It’s a thing that happens to you.’”

Rotor closed his eyes in a long blink, “A thing that hurts, innit it right?”

“Sometimes,” Gilly agreed, squeezing his hand, “That’s life though, when you are Real. We all become it bit by bit. But it doesn’t happen if you’re not strong, if you’re not soft, if you’re not sturdy.”

“ But how can y'be all of those at once ?” he wheezed out. It’s getting hard to catch his breath.

“You are all that right now, aren’t you?” Gilly asked him with piercing eyes, “No one else of all these Boys has had the strength to ask for me. And I will Witness you as I have kept all those of my sisters who’ve fallen these past days.”

This series is not always easy, it doesn’t shy away from the hard or the dark or the painful, but it is always worth reading.

The Unspoken Truth by Nonymos (MCU, Clint/Loki)

Barton glared at him like he was trying to decide whether he was being mocked or not, but the next second, his shoulders slumped. Loki was familiar with the feeling – that dreadful feeling of discovering something repulsive in one's own nature.

And then, he waited. He waited for Barton to think and connect the dots, to realize that an obvious solution was standing just before him, to remember how he had felt when waking up tied down, or being forced to drink down the water. The demi-god just stood there, hoping – almost praying for the first time in his life – that his enemy would look up at him with something else than hatred in his eyes.

No one writes kink quite like Nonymos writes kink, and this series is the perfect encapsulation of that.

The Stone Gryphon by rthstewart (Narnia, primarily Gen)

"Tools!" Richard was so shocked he was near speechless. He sat down heavily on the bench and began writing frantically in that strange code. "You are saying that you have observed ordinary crows use tools? Peter, that is… remarkable."

"Well, I've seen Beavers use fishing tackle and sewing machines, so it didn't seem that unusual at the time."

I’m not going to lie, this may not be to everyone’s taste. But, amateur theologian, lover of weird animal facts, and history nerd that I am, there are very few fics more exactly tailored to my interests.

Republic of Heaven Community Radio by ErinPtah (WtNV x His Dark Materials, Cecil/Carlos)

The greeting catches both her and Carlos off-guard. It's not wrong to talk directly to another person's daemon, but it's still a little weird. "Likewise," she stammers.

They're both waiting for the obvious next step, which is for Cecil to introduce his daemon. The fact that Carlos hasn't spotted her yet is understandable — a big community gathering in a small space, you get plenty of daemons breaking away from their humans to socialize directly with each other. Any of the dozen animal shapes currently within ten feet of them could be Cecil's. If his daemon has an unusually high range, there are even more possibilities.

What Cecil says instead is, "If you ever have any important experimental-theology news that you need to share with the town, call me any time! Everyone listens to my show." There's a touch of what Carlos hopes is nothing more sinister than smugness when he adds, "Everyone."

He steps out of the way to let someone else interrogate Carlos, and vanishes into the crowd. Carlos doesn't get a chance to see what daemon he leaves with.

This may be the most carefully thought out crossover I’ve ever read, and I’m a little in awe of ErinPtah’s skills.

The Soul in the Machine by missdreawrites & Troodon (Dishonoured, Corvo/Outsider)

“... Outsider?” Corvo asked, sitting down on the filthy floor. “In the published list of the people who died of the Plague… how many were registered Augments?”

<There have been a total of 231 dead in the past year. Of that group, 100% were Augmented individuals. This number has increased exponentially under Hiram Burrows’ “The Boldest Moves Are The Safest” law, allowing the execution of any individual infected by the Plague.>

“Son of a bitch, ” Corvo swore with feeling. “This is… look at this waste. We aren't even people to them, are we?” He looked down at the body next to him. “And I killed the one person who could help. I did this. I doomed an entire people to plague, and murder and…”

The cyberpunk Dishonoured AU I desperately wish I’d thought of, because it works so very well.

In Which Tony Stark Builds Himself Some Friends (But His Family Was Assigned by Nick Fury) by scifigrl47 (MCU, Steve/Tony)

“Do you know what the difference between a villain and a super villain is, Stark?” Coulson said, leaning his palms on the tabletop, looming over everything like a very snappily dressed gargoyle.

“Style?” Tony asked, pointing both index fingers in Coulson's direction like the gunslinger that he was. He added a wide grin to the gesture, but Coulson didn't seem to notice.

“A villain has a giant mass of robotic vacuum cleaners that he can sic on his enemies. A super villain gives them the ability to fly.”

“In my defense, I do not actually remember installing repulsor technology in the Roombas,” Tony said, choosing his words carefully. It had been a working theory, sure, but he still wasn't quite sure when he implemented it. Maybe sometime on Tuesday night... That one was a blur. “It was a very long couple of days. So I was as surprised by that as everyone else.”

This doesn’t really count as a rec, since everyone in the fandom has read it already, but it really wouldn’t be fair to draw up a ‘best of the 2010s’ list and not include this.

A Great and Gruesome Height by mokuyoubi (Hannibal, Will/Hannibal)

Bedelia lashes out but Will is quicker. He grabs her wrist, pressing hard between the delicate bones with his thumb, until she makes a soft noise of distress and drops the fork.

Hannibal purses his lips and leans in close to her ear. “Now that is disappointing,” he whispers, and Bedelia has the good sense to be afraid with that mouth so near her skin. He inhales her scent deeply and straightens. “I thought you and I were beyond such petty jabs.”

“Were it not for the fact that you required medical attention, I have no doubt I would have met a similarly crass ending at the hands of your pet,” she says, lip curling in disgust.

Hannibal smiles serenely and says, “Will is a creature entirely of his own making. It is not to me to guide his hand. Merely to share in the sublime perfection of his vision, when he allows it.”

There are many dark!Will stories out there, and most of them are a lot of fun, but few are quite at believable as this one.

[fleetofshippyships-archive]

Fanfic Author Meme

Tagged by @diligent-thunder and @rockmarina​ =)

Okay, so I’m me, and I talked way too much, so I’m putting this under a cut to save your dashes. You’re welcome 😘

Please do not reblog this post.

Author Name: 

Fleetofshippyships + Knowyourincantations + Legendaryroar

Fandoms You Write For: 

(in order of decreasing # of fics) Harry Potter, Voltron, Merlin, Yuri on Ice, Star Trek, Star Wars and then a few one-offs that aren’t really worth mentioning.

Where You Post: 

AO3 primarily, Tumblr, trying to post more on Pillowfort, I also post on a couple of sites for knowyourincantations

Most Popular One-Shot: 

Fleetofshippyships: Potter’s Insatiable Cock (Drarry, Explicit (duh XD), 20k (viewable only for logged-in AO3 users)).

Knowyourincantations: A Decent Start to Things (Pansmione, Teen, 7k)

Legendaryroar: Finding Time for Rest (Sheith (Voltron), Teen, 3k)

Most Popular Multi-Chapter Story: 

RestraintNone of my old multi-chapter fics are available to read at this time and I don’t really write multi-chapter fics anymore.

If oneshot/drabble collections or two-shots count, then:

Fleetofshippyships: Vanilla and Sweet Spices (Drarry, Explicit, 2 chapters, 20k)

and this really doesn’t count, but technically it has multiple ‘chapters’ soooooooooo

Legendaryroar: Kinktober 2018 (Multiple ships (Voltron), Explicit (duh), 31 ‘chapters’, 26k)

Favourite Story You Wrote: 

I don’t think I ever have a static favourite, I’ve just written too many things, I too quickly move on to the next (and frequently forget some of my own fics exist XD), but recently I re-read In Pursuit of Red Wine (Dreville, Teen, 29k) and really enjoyed that again, and I am really attached to it cos it was my first longish rarepair fic, kind of proving to myself that I can write longer rarepair stuff. 

I also recently re-read Unburdened (Merthur (BBC Merlin), Explicit, 2k) and really enjoyed that too, had a total disconnect from having written it since it’s been so long, so I was able to read it without self-judging, and oh boy that was nice. 

I’m also quite proud of Healing What’s Left (Parkgrass, Teen, 2k) for some reason, I dunno, maybe the dark political backdrop of the fic, or maybe just cos it’s the first time I’ve written Daphne as the main character and I’m happy with the result and now have some headcanons about her rather than her being an unknown blank character to me. 

I also binge read a lot of my Voltron stuff recently and had big feels over that so....I also specifically enjoyed re-reading The Perks of Skincare (Klance (Voltron), Explicit, 3k) again cos I dunno, I like how I wrote Lance XD and also the Sheith fic I linked earlier is a fav for sure. Shiro/Rest is the ultimate OTP.

It really depends how soon after I write something or when I go back to re-read it as to what my fav is at any given time (or people commenting on it and hyping me up for it again).

Story You Were Nervous to Post: 

Everything. But most recently I was terrified out of my mind before posting: 

Friday Night by the Fire (Harry/Neville, Teen, 583 words) because I have a lot of fears about screwing up trying to write ace characters and somehow not even making that a focal point of the drabble made it even more terrifying,  No More Waiting (TianShan (19 Days), Teen, 2k) because it was a new fandom to write in, Harry Potter and the Maudlin Merman series (Drarry, Teen+ Mature, 3k +6k) due to my feelings of inadequacy because it would be better as long fic but I struggle too much with writing these days to write long fics and can only manage short things. I’d rather write this as a long fic, but then I’d never finish it so connected oneshots are the best I can do right now, but I still feel it’s not good enough and have a meltdown whenever I post one. And speaking of which, I’ve been sitting on the next one for months and should probably just fucking post it already.

Actually, most recently: Minding One’s Limits (Cho/Ginny, G rated, 1.5k), because I gave Cho a disability modeled off my fibromyalgia and wrote a scenario similar to something I’d dealt with myself, it was incredibly uncomfortable to write in the first place, and then terrifying to post, even though it’s so short. But in the end I’m proud I finally wrote about it a bit? I dunno, might take me a while to work up the nerve again though XD (also was my first time writing that ship, so there was a lot of nervousness over that too)

Oh, and I was a super ball of anxiety posting  Kinktober 2018 (Multiple ships, Explicit, 31 ‘chapters’, 26k) because for almost all of those it was the first time I was writing those kinks (and some were kind of squicks for me but I wanted to see if I could write them anyway cos I’m dumb like that) and in a lot of cases those ships were completely new for me to write too, in addition to trying to write and post 1 a day, so...yeah. Also that was my first time writing tentacle and human/werewolf smut so...yeah. I was an absolute mess that month and not in a fun way. But I’m still really glad I did it, it was fun =D

In summary, I’m always an anxious mess posting anything, but most especially if it’s something I’ve not written before or is personal to me XD

How Do You Choose Your Titles: 

Most of the time I’m staring down the empty title field in AO3 cursing like a fucking sailor when I choose titles XD Sometimes it’s a line/theme/feeling from the fic. Sometimes it’s totally random and just comes to me. Sometimes I just grasp the first thing that I can no matter how stupid it sounds cos it’s been three days and I still don’t have a title and I’m over it and ready to post before I lose my nerve.

And tbh, it’s only getting harder to think of titles as my number of fics increases, and I’ve now started thinking of the perfect titles only to realise I already have a published fic by that title so....TITLES CAN DIE A FIERY DEATH

Sometimes, not so much anymore, it would turn out that I would give a wip doc a name just so I’d know what it was, sometimes as a joke with whoever was reading it and cheerleading while I wrote it, and then I would refer to it by that and think of it as that so much that when it came time to actually give the fic a title, it was too late and I could not think past that stupid file name, and that’s how Potter’s Insatiable Cock happened, and how I very nearly called a Merthur fic Arthur’s Wanking Tower (saved that one at the last moment thank god cos the tone of that fic is actually really serious and emotional and wtf was I even thinking with that file name and actually I linked to that fic above XD it ended up being called Unburdened). 

Potter’s Insatiable Cock slipped through cos it’s actually relevant to the fic content and I could live with it.

But needless to say, I don’t give my wip docs joke names anymore XD

Do You Outline: 

Only if I never want to actually write the idea...once I outline, it’s over. I can’t write to a detailed plan. It stifles me. I’ll always get stuck having to try and think ahead to the plan, and then I lose the flow and nothing works because I’m a pantser/intuitive/instinctive writer not a planner. Sometimes I jot down ideas but in like, the vaguest of ways, usually more focused on emotional development than actual scenes or events or anything because then I won’t be able to write it (and I rarely stick to those vague ideas anyway). 

I can really only write when I’m staring down a blank doc with no idea where it’s going and discover it as I go (which is why writing is so fun for me). I can only finish a fic if I don’t think too hard about what’s going to happen next and just let it happen as I write. 

This of course means that editing is a fucking bitch when I finish anything, beginnings often get totally re-written, but if I plan, it just doesn't happen at all, so I’ll take the extra editing if it means I manage to write something.

I do have a lot of detailed plotty fic idea outlines...and I mourn them cos I’m never going to write them now, but they’re so goooooooooood XD

Complete: 

Online (across all 3 accounts): 381 (incl. my hidden drarry fics as they are technically online just hidden, not incl. individual oneshots/drabbles in collection ‘fics’, of which there are ridiculously many). Offline: 20 (I have the worst habit of just sitting on completed fics and I really need to stop)

In-Progress: 

Too many to name, last time I counted it was ~60 but that wasn’t even including my vld wips so...I don’t actually know. I hoard wips and just switch up what I work on all the time depending on mood/interest levels/effort required. 

Current main focuses are a 50k+ plotty Drarry (*fingerscrossed* cos this is my first time seriously attempting something long (will probably reach 80k at least) in a very long time and I put it down for a few months and thought that was it but then I picked it up again recently, yay!), and re-writing some hidden fics I can’t put them back up in the quality they’re in, I just can’t guys, they’re awful.

I’ve been thinking a lot about working on the longish 8th year Pansmione fic I started for the wlw big bang before I had to pull out of cos stupid life stuff. I might pick that up again for a bit too, couldn’t be more different from the Drarry one so it’d make a nice focus break =)

Coming Soon/Not Yet Started: 

I don’t even plan fics I’m writing, I sure don’t plan ahead to stuff I haven’t even started XD The only think I can think of for this category would be me re-writing my hidden long Drarry fics.

Oh, and there will be a Merthur oneshot coming (hopefully) soon, because @april-thelightfury115​ won my custom fic giveaway with a merthur idea. Just waiting for my brain to cooperate so I can start that and not suck XD but I’m so fucking excited to write some Merthur again, you have no idea.

Oh, and lots more Sapphic September drabbles coming too, I’m way behind and only just posted day 11 cos this month is literal hell for me, but I am still planning on finishing the prompt list, no matter how long it takes, but no plan for those, not even which ships, I just sit down with the next prompt and a blank doc and see what happens.

Do You Accept Prompts: 

Yes, I love writing to prompts, I’m take them via google form here, but I’m in such a bad space with my health I’ve been really struggling with writing lately, managed to do a bit of editing (fuck knows how), but writing new stuff is so hard, so there’s a long wait while I wait for my fibro fog to ease off to the point I can write new stuff with more regularity (and less stupid errors I have to edit out later).

Upcoming Story You Are Most Excited to Write: 

Again, I so don’t plan. But I really want to be making more progress on the long plotty drarry wip I’m trying to write. I’m still not sure I’ll have the guts to post it even if I do finish it, given its subject matter (it would make a great careers or consent fest fic tbh), but damn I’m really excited by it. Not sure I can maintain it being plotty and not revert to focusing on the relationship (which is easier for me), but I can only try and see what happens. (trying to write a non-relationship plot without planning is a nightmare but I don’t have a choice if I want to write it at all XD)

I’m also now excited for my longish pansmione wip too actually, just because it’s already longer than my Dreville long-ish fic and it’s exciting and scary to do longer rarepair stuff. I’m way out of my comfort zone with the fic itself, but I dunno, I re-read some recently and fell in love with it all over again, like, flustered lesbian-awakening, disaster for Pansy (but sure she still hates her) Hermione? YES PLEASE! and also, I am guilty of not writing female characters as much as I should because, well, canonically, they don’t have much depth and I’m very meh about them, but in this there’s a huge focus on them because they’re all determined to band together for 8th year and Hermione is making friends with them (Parvati is like, dragging her along all the time XD) where she once dismissed them so it’s scary but exciting =D I’m getting more practice with all the sapphic I do over on knowyourincantations, so I feel more confident working on this wip now =D

I’m also kind of excited about re-writing my old long fics, because they’re all 3 years old now, and my writing tastes (and skill, yikes) have totally changed, so it’s like I’m writing the story again but how I would write it now while maintaining the overall same plot, so it’s really interesting, like discovering the story all over again. Like in one (Making Malfoy Blush) I’ve gone as far as introducing a new side character to replace another’s parts because I no longer feel those parts are in character for them. It’s super terrifying, but it’s fun at the same time =) it’ll take me forever to do these though, so I dunno about ‘upcoming’ really, I only chip away every now and then when I’m unable to write new stuff but am still coherent enough to do something.

Eh, it is what it is, I can’t write like I used to, hence me being inactive more than active these days, but I’m trying to work within my new limitations instead of getting frustrated with them and just giving up entirely =)

---

Now, who to tag....I think anyone I would tag has already done it, and if not..I blame the fog if I’m forgetting someone obvious, if you wanna do it just say I tagged you so I can be nosy and take a look =)

Again, please do not reblog this post

[blueeyeswhitegarden]

Yuya and Reiji for the meme!

This is going to be pretty long, so I’ll put my answers under the cut.

Yuya:

Why I like them/why I don’t like them: Of course, I love Yuya. There are so many reasons why I like him. He’s just so likable, relatable and sympathetic. He genuinely wants to make everyone around him happy even when he’s dealing with so much sadness and pain himself. I love that he wears his heart on his sleeve, which makes it easier to emphasize with him. Even though he deals with emotional issues like self-doubt and self-confidence throughout the series, I love that being emotional himself was never treated as a flaw exactly. Even near the end of the series, Yuya would still break out into tears, but he wasn’t looked down for it. That is so refreshing, especially for a lead male character.

He struggles through his emotional problems throughout the series, but he doesn’t give up on his goals in spite of those issues. That makes him inspiring in a way. Wanting to end the Dimensional War works so well with his goal of becoming a great Entertainment Duelist like his father, as well as the tone of the series in general. I love that he is able to reach out to people more with his dueling once he develops his own kind of dueling. Instead of trying to be someone he isn’t, being himself made Yuya closer to his goal, which was a nice touch considering his self-confidence issues. His development is fantastic and he is still my favorite character in the franchise.

What I like about their appearance: I think that the red, green and orange color scheme works really well for his design. Plus, I still love how fans see his hair as a tomato and a Christmas tree. It’s a cute fun little joke.

Do I prefer their dub names or their original name?: Yuya has the same name in both versions, but I do prefer how the Japanese version pronounces his last name. Maybe I was just too used it after watching the Japanese version for nearly two years before the dub even came out, but Sa-ka-KEY sounds like a much more natural way to say Sakaki to me than Sa-KA-key does.

OTP: I love his relationship with Yuzu. They’re such good and caring friends, which makes it easier to believe that they’d develop romantic feelings for each other. I especially appreciate that you can read their relationship as platonic or romantic, but either way, they clearly love each other.

NOTP: I’m not really a fan of any of the pairings between the Yuya counterparts, mainly because the idea of being romantically interested in someone who has the same face always sounded weird to me. I probably dislike his pairing with Yuri the most given how he treated Yuya in the series.

OT3: While I don’t like the pairings romantically, I think that the relationships between Yuya, Yuzu, Sora, as well as with Gongenzaka, are really good. They all have good friendships with each other.

Favorite card they use: I love so many of Yuya’s Performapals, but Discover Hippo and Silver Claw would be some of my favorites. They’re cute and perfect sized monsters for Yuya to ride on. Odd Eyes Pendulum Dragon is also great and is a pretty cool ace monster. Smile World is really good too. It represents Yuya’s ideals on dueling, as well as perfectly captures his goals. He wants to make everyone, including his enemies, smile with his dueling.

Favorite moment they were in: There are a lot of great moments for Yuya, but one of my favorite ones were his last turn against Jack. Seeing Yuya being able to reach out to the whole City with his dueling was so heartwarming and wonderful. Whenever I think back to that moment, to that duel and to Jack holding Yuya’s arm up to celebrate his victory, I still get immensely happy. It’s one of those moments that remind me just how much I love both Yuya and Arc V itself.

Least favorite moment: I’m not sure if this counts, but it was probably when it was revealed that Zarc had taken over Yuya completely after Yuri was defeated. It was a good shocking twist for the match and it made sense, but I was also really sad that Yuya wasn’t able to fight off Zarc’s influence even after struggling so much.

Would I fuck, marry or kill them?: I love Yuya, but I’m also over twice his age, so I wouldn’t be into those first two options and I obviously wouldn’t want to kill him. I would want to give him a big hug and have a duel with him instead.

Reiji:

Why I like them/why I don’t like him?: I like Reiji. I still remember thinking he was going to be another Kaiba clone based on his character information, but he turned out to be a much different and refreshing take on a main rival. He was still Yuya’s main rival, but they were more polar opposites. Yuya is more emotional and prone to act out of anger, while Reiji is more calm, collected and calculated. He rarely acts without having a plan in motion and only takes action himself when he deems necessary. That made their rivalry pretty different and refreshing, especially when Yuya wasn’t focused on defeating Reiji. Plus, I like how Yuya and Reiji slowly develop a nice friendship over the course of the series.

Being more morally gray also helped to make him more interesting. In retrospect, I do think I was a bit hard on him, mainly during season two. I never hated him or thought he was evil like a lot of fans did, but a combination of misreading his behavior/actions and being surrounded by a lot of negativity towards him made me upset at him for awhile. After getting away from that negative environment and looking back at what he did, I think too many people, myself included, read his calm demeanor as being too cold or a sign that he didn’t care about people around him. Even now when rewatching the series, I’ll often think to myself that Reiji didn’t deserve the hate he got and feel kind of bad about how his character was received.

What I like about their appearance: Reiji’s scarf is still so ridiculous that it turns around to become awesome again. I love it and the jokes about it make it even better. His plain blue shirt really works for his design too.

Do I prefer their dub names or original names?: I prefer Reiji over Delcan. I’m just more used to Reiji and I think it fits him more than Delcan does. It isn’t one of the worst dub names, but it is pretty strange. It is a shame that they didn’t choose Reggie instead. Maybe they didn’t want to do that because of Shark’s dub name, but Reggie would have been a much more fitting choice than Delcan.

OTP: I don’t have too many pairings for Reiji, but I kind of liked the pairing between him and Serena. I thought that meeting three years prior to the start of the series gave them some potential for an interesting relationship. I kind of like his relationship with Yuya. I don’t see it as romantic, mainly due to how I can’t see Yuya developing romantic feelings for anyone besides Yuzu, but I like it as a platonic pairing if that makes any sense.

NOTP: I’m not sure if there is a Reiji pairing that bothers me that much. Maybe the closest would be his pairing with Shun, but even then, I’m more indifferent towards it than anything else.

OT3: I think I have a three character pairing involving Reiji that I like either.

Favorite card they use: Unlike most rivals, Reiji usually use different monsters as opposed to having a more traditional ace monster. I thought that the three new D/D/D monsters he used during his third duel with Yuya were pretty cool and intimidating. I also liked his use of Contract cards in general. He always had a plan in mind when using them, which fits with his personality quite nicely.

Favorite moment they were in: One of my favorite moments for Reiji was when he was struggling against Leo during his tag duel with Yuya. Reiji had spent years preparing to stop his father and the show had shown just how powerful he is multiple times. But he still couldn’t defeat his father, even with Yuya’s help. Leo even called him out on his poor strategy and Reiji was clearly shaken up over being put into a tight spot. Since Reiji is so calm and collected most of the time, seeing him actually struggling against another opponent and being more clearly emotional made the moment stand out.

It’s also why I was glad that they didn’t have Reiji lose to hype up another secondary villain before this point. If he had lost to Roger or Yuri before, it would have weakened the emotional impact of this moment since we would have already seen Reiji lose before. It helped to make Leo more threatening and the fact that Reiji couldn’t defeat him even after planning for this confrontation for years gave the moment some good emotional weight behind it. Plus, the tag duel had some nice moments for Yuya and Reiji’s friendship so that was nice.

Least favorite moment: I’d probably go with Reiji making sure that the LDS trio’s memories were altered. It did show Reiji’s morally gray mindset, which does help to make him more interesting, but I also think that was the starting point of people thinking that Reiji was secretly evil. Plus, it wasn’t the best way to effectively write the LDS trio out of the plot. People might have thought Reiji was really evil regardless of how they handled the LDS trio, but handling that in a different manner that still showed that Reiji is morally gray might have helped.

Would I fuck, marry or kill them?: Reiji is cool, but I’m still over ten years older than him, so I wouldn’t be interested in the first two options. I certainly wouldn’t want to kill Reiji. I like the idea of telling him to relax and have some fun after the events of the series since he would definitely need that.

Thank you for asking. ^_^

[darkwingsnark]

Goofy headcanon, and #'s 1 and 2 for him? :) and also for Rockerduck, too? and MegaVolt, too :D

I already did Megavolt, but I’ll give you the other two!

Goofy

1: sexuality headcanon: Pansexual. 

2: otp: Tie between Goofy/Donald and OT3 Goofy/Peg/Pete. But those are my usual go to’s, and what I headcanon depending on the story/universe I’m thinking about. I also REALLY like him with Clarabelle.

3: brotp: That’s easy, Donald and Mickey. They’re his homeboys. (Also Sora if we’re talking Kingdom Hearts.)

4: notp: …. My mind has gone blank. I don’t tends to hate ships enough to call them that.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head: Goofy gives the best massages. To the point his son Max has suggested he open up a business. But naw, he doesn’t want to do that. Massages are meant to be given freely as a sign you care, as far as he’s concerned. he wouldn’t feel right accepting people’s money for it.

6: one way in which I relate to this character: I, too, am a goof with a lot of love to give.

7: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: The scene in ‘An Extremely Goofy Movie’ where he’s walking into his first day of college– thinking he’s the bee’s knees. I don’t usually relate to Max with his daddy troubles– mostly because how dare he see anything wrong when he has a loving father that works hard to support him????- but… That scene was too much. I was just thinking ‘oh god oh no’. It was funny though.8: cinnamon roll or problematic fave? I’M saying cannamon roll, but I’m very much aware he has his flaws. 

Rockerduck

1: sexuality headcanon: Aro Ace, but I question whether he knows that term since he’s an old man. I think he knows he’s not interested in relationships, though. When going to events he does usually make sure to have a date or two, though, just to make himself look good.

2: otp: None so far. But let me just say I am in LOVE with that one post where Rockerduck suggests to Glomgold they get married just to beat Scrooge. Can you imagine? Just them being roomates and acting like it, but when they’re in public playing it up as ‘SO IN LOOOOVE’. And trying to steal the limelight from Scrooge at every turn. Because I’m imagining it and it’s HILARIOUS to me.

3: brotp: I actually think his rivalry with Scrooge and Glomgold is good for him. Keeps him on his toes, and find ways to improve.

4: notp: none

5: first headcanon that pops into my head: Okay, so depending on the writer John can change pretty drastically on just how villainous he is. I tend to prefer him not going as low as Glomgold does, as in willing to break the law to achieve things. Sure, he’ll still be an ass; but his schemes are more petty and about one upping the other two. Especially Scrooge because he’s still not over the fact McDuck won his father’s approval when he never could. I think this helps him be a nice foil to both Scrooge and Glomgold because with McDuck it’s very ‘old way vs new age/hard working vs convenience’. And then with Glomgold you have their difference in achieving their goals to beat Scrooge.

6: one way in which I relate to this character: I would like to get the respect of a parent, too. :c I’m needy and want some good parental love, dammit.

7: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: This is something I wrote in ‘Investments’, buuuut… There’s a bit where John is being interviewed and he’s talking about Scrooge’s newly discovered relationship with Fenton. He goes on to talking about gay stereotypes, and while I don’t think he MEANT it to be homophobic… it was. It so was. While writing it I was just going ‘what a pretentious asshole’.  I love it, though. 8: cinnamon roll or problematic fave? Problem child with some daddy issues.

[bigshoeswamp]

for the fandom meme, do ars, pls

YESS! Thanks for asking!!

Fandom: Ars Paradoxica

How long I’ve been a fan: Since June 2016… wow, it’s been longer than I realized

Favourite episode: … That’s a tough one. I love Signal, and Greenhouse and Plasticity and… OK. If I have to choose one, I’ll go with Dawn. It brings all these characters we’ve grown to love together, and every interaction feels natural and heartwarming (and breaking, a lot of time- of course, it’s ars). It brings up so many important stuff too, that dialog with chet was so, so well done. Also, the way the plot is moving is so entertaining! I can’t wait to discover what will happen next, what everybody will do in their new positions and aposdkas… I totally overdone this, sorry.

Least favourite episode: I don’t dislike any, tbh. The first one, I guess, ‘cause I feel they were still getting a grip on writing the universe and the character. It just gets better and better from there. 

Favourite character: again, HARD. I’ll go with Sally, ‘cause I’ve loved her from the very start, and the love only seems to grow. I just want her to be happy…. ler her be happy. 

Least favourite character: Donovan. He was just the standard secret agency director, tbh. I do love how he played into the story, though, sort of passing the baton and opening the path for it to be reinvented. I loved how they started off with the classic government shady agency type of organization and totally changed it with the story’s progression. 

Favourite moment: Aah, how am I supposed to choose??… I’ll cheat and say two. 1- Sally and Esther whole conversation in Greenhouse, when Sally comes out as ace. I love their relationship so much, the incomplete comfortableness of it, and Sally being ace made me SO happy, I was like, dazed for the rest of the day. 2- The conversation with Chet about the way ODAR acts, and “making America great again”. It’s so, so important, and I love everything about it.

Least favourite moment: This podcast is pure suffering, so this one is hard too. Nihkil dying, I guess. And how it affects Sally. 

Favourite thing about it: The characters. They’re all so well written and captivating, it’s amazing. Also, the representation they bring is so important. I’m truly grateful for Ars to develop them and their voices and issues so well and truthfully.

Least favourite thing about it: The way they made Esther a jew, and how little they it’s talked about. They’ve made up partially for it last episode, but I still wish it had been done differently, and for it to come up more.

Your OTP/OT3/OT+: Bridget/Esther. I LOVE THEM, let them talk and solve their issues and be happy aodaosdk (yeaah, not gonna happen that easily, but a girl can dream)

A headcanon: I’ll cheat again and say two.

Bridget is fluent in 6 languages. English, Hebrew, Spanish, Latin, French and German. She used to call Esther pet names or make fun of her in them. Which made Esther totally frustrated until she discovered what Bridget was saying. Sometimes she said it, sometimes not. Esther picked a few of the pet names, though, and started using them playfully, until they sticked. 

After Nihkil left, Mateo got this habit of making him little notes about his progress and his days, in case they managed to get in contact. They started of pretty small, but when he realized he was writing pages a week. He keeps them in a box, and even when his hopes start to fade, he makes sure to do them, even if they’re small. 

Unpopular opinion: I don’t know if it’s an unpopular opinion, but I’ve seen people who don’t share it. I love June. I never really disliked her, and I’m absolutely in love with her development. 

Favourite quote: I’m terrible with quotes, sorry. I’ll say this one, though:

“Sally: … People still do that. It’s how the country does things, where I’m from. You just see someone different from you, so you think they’re dangerous, and you just… fire(…) The problem isn’t that we didn’t have time travel. The problem is us.”