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sailor-aviator · 1 year

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Meet Me at the Sea: Chapter One

Meet Me at the Sea: Chapter One

Pairing: Jake "Hangman" Seresin x Reader

Summary: Your best friend, Bob Floyd, had insisted you join him for the summer at his family's home along the Carolina coasts. You had been hesitant at first, but ultimately agreed to his request. Now, here you were in a new town with strange locals who spoke in hushed whispers and cryptic retellings about glistening scales, glowing eyes, and haunting songs that echoed from the sea. You didn't believe them at first, but when you wake up on the beach one morning after having fallen overboard the night before, you can't help but think that maybe you hadn't imagine the strong arms and deep, green eyes of the man that had saved you.

Trigger warnings: Alcohol consumption, Sassy Bob, Flirty Bradley, Supernatural elements, Siren calls. I think that's it?

Word Count: 3.1k

A/N: Here is chapter one!! I hope you enjoy this story as much as I am enjoying writing it lol I'm so excited to continue this one. Just a quick reminder to you all that I will be out of town Wednesday-Saturday, so I'm not sure how much I'll be able to update as I will be attending a wedding! As always, reblogs, comments, and likes are greatly appreciated! 18+ ONLY!! You can also follow me on AO3 under sailor_aviator where I will be posting updates as well!

Series Masterlist || Jake "Hangman" Seresin Tag List

You crossed the bridge to North Island a few hours later, the sun hanging low in the sky, but not quite to the point of setting. You marveled at the expanse of water that stretched on beneath you as you drove.

“Not sure why the founders wanted to settle way the hell out here,” Bob grumbled beside you. “We’re too small to even have a damn Walmart.”

“Walmart is overrated,” you told him, turning the radio down. “Besides, small towns are so cute!”

“Not when you’re forced to live there every day,” Bob retorted with a roll of his eyes. You rolled your eyes back at him, repositioning Rusty who still sat on your lap.

“You’re too close to it to see all the charm it has to offer.”

“I give it two weeks before you eat those words,” he smirked. You reached over to smack his shoulder lightly, and he looked over at you in mock shock. “Don’t hit the driver!”

“Well, maybe the driver shouldn’t be such a cynic,” you teased, leaning back. Bob chuckled as the car reached the other side of the bay, passing the crowded beaches. “Does North Island get a lot of tourists?”

“Only during the summertime, really,” he replied. “It’s a calm, quiet little town with white beaches and pretty views all over the island. The founders have really played into the local legends over the years, so we have a lot of souvenir shops dedicated to those.”

“What local legends?” you asked him, quirking a brow. Bob flushed, the tips of his ears turning a bright red.

“It’s dumb,” he grumbled, but you were listening intently now.

The two of you drove through the downtown area, people milling about and enjoying the end of the summer day. The dinner crowd was beginning to pick up and you could hear the music blaring from several different buildings.

“No, come on,” you grinned. “You can’t drop that little tidbit and then not tell me.”

“Alright, fine,” he sighed, glancing at you. “For as long as the town has been around, there have been stories of…things in the water.”

“What do you mean? Like a really big fish or something?”

He shifted in his seat, turning down a side road that led away from town.

“I mean,” he hummed, “things like mermaids.”

You laughed at that, and Bob grimaced. “I told you it was dumb,” he muttered.

“No, no,” you giggled. “It’s cute, really. I love mermaids!”

He rolled his eyes. “You wouldn’t if you grew up surrounded by them.”

“There you go being all cynical again,” you scowled. “I would have killed to live somewhere like this with such fun local legends.”

Bob pulled down a gravel driveway and past a grouping of trees. You saw a grand, white house perched at the edge of the hill overlooking the water. A porch wrapped around both the first and second floor, and you saw a path lead down the hill towards the beach.

“I’m glad one of us is excited to be here,” he chuckled, coming to a stop on the blacktop as you stared at the large house in front of you.

“You live here?” You asked, looking over at him in shock.

Bob had the decency to look sheepish as he turned off the car. “Yeah, this is home.”

At that moment, a small, blonde woman opened the door with a wide grin. She rushed out onto the porch as a burly, spectacled man stepped out behind her. Bob opened his door, and you followed suit. Susan Floyd rushed down the steps and up towards you, wrapping you in a warm hug before turning to give her son a matching one. Richard Floyd gave you a warm smile as he clapped his son on the back.

“You two must be exhausted after that drive,” Susan cooed, ushering you into the house as the two men moved to get your luggage out of the car. You smiled warmly at her and allowed her to lead you into the house.

“I’m not too tired,” you told her as she sat you down in a stool by the island in the kitchen. It was a spacious room, opening up into the dining room. A set of glass doors led out onto the back porch, the ocean sitting front and center in the beautiful view of the beach below.

“That’s good,” she hummed, stirring the pot on the stove. “Are you hungry, sweetie? I made some of my special spaghetti. It’s Bobby’s favorite, you know.”

Bob groaned as he stepped into the kitchen with his father. “Mom, I’ve told you. It’s not Bobby, it’s Bob.”

Susan smiled at the younger man affectionately. “Yes, of course dear. Were you hungry?”

“Starved, actually,” he smiled, plopping down in the seat next to you. Susan began piling noodles and sauce onto two different plates before setting them down in front of the two of you. Bob uttered a thanks before shoveling a healthy fork full into his mouth. You giggled, watching as he ate like he hadn’t eaten in months. You took a much smaller bite than he had, humming at how good the sauce tasted. It had a hint of red wine that pulled out the flavors of the garlic and herbs.

“How’s it taste?” she smiled at you, leaning against the counter.

“Ifs delisus,” Bob said through a mouthful of noodles. She scowled at him before throwing a napkin at him.

“Don’t talk with your mouthful,” she scolded before turning to look at you expectantly. You chuckled before nodding your agreement.

“It’s delicious, Mrs. Floyd.”

“No, none of that,” she scowled. “Call me Susan.”

“Yes, Susan,” you smiled. She smiled at you before turning to clean up the rest of the kitchen. Bob inhaled his first plate of spaghetti, and Susan was quick to load his plate up with more.

“Has Bob told you any of the town’s history yet, y/n?” Richard asked you from his spot at the dining room table. Bob groaned, hiding his face in his hands as you smiled.

“He told me about the mermaid legends,” you grinned. You saw Susan pause out of the corner of your eye as Richard gave you a wry smile.

“I don’t know if I would call them mermaids,” he mused, giving a pointed look at his son who refused to meet his gaze. “But our town has a long, storied history, yes.”

“Oh?” You asked, eyebrows shooting up in surprise.

Richard hummed, leaning back in his chair. “No, mermaid is an insulting term for what these creatures are. They’re fierce hunters, preying these waters with deadly accuracy. Sometimes they even hunt on land.”

“What do you mean?” You frowned. Susan gave him a warning look, but he continued.

“They say these creatures come out of the depths to prey on humans on the land, dragging them into the depths never to be seen again.”

“Alright, that’s enough,” Susan snapped at him, Richard giving her an apologetic look. “I don’t want to hear any more of that nonsense tonight. Why don’t you make yourself useful and go take out the trash?”

Richard heaved a sigh, standing to obey her. He passed you with a wink, dropping a hand to your shoulder.

“I’m sure you have nothing to worry about, y/n,” he smiled, turning to head out the door. Susan sighed, turning to look at you once she heard the door close behind him.

“I’m sorry about him,” she grumbled, shooting a glare at where her husband had just disappeared. “He loves those crazy stories. Don’t even pay him any mind, okay?”

“I don’t mind!” You assured her. “I think it’s all very interesting. The most anyone talks about where I’m from is Bigfoot.”

“As much as I would love to hear you go on your bigfoot theories tirade again,” Bob spoke up, rolling his eyes. “I thought you might want to go out tonight.”

“Bobby, I’m sure she’s tired,” his mother started, but you shook your head, turning excitedly to look at your best friend.

“No, it’s fine!” You chirped. “I think it would be fun to go out and get to see the sites. Where did you have in mind?”

“I was thinkin’ I could take you down to the Hard Deck,” he mused.

Susan rolled her eyes at him. “You want to take her to a bar of all things?”

“Why not? The gang is going to be there tonight, I already texted them to make sure. They’re anxious to meet her.”

Susan seemed to brighten at that. “Oh, you’ll love’em, y/n! They’re such a good group of kids, and I just know they’ll love you too.”

“So we have your blessing then?” Bob joked, earning another scowl.

“Yes, you kids go out and have a good time, but don’t be out too late! I think your father said something about wanting to take the boat out tomorrow morning.”

“Yes, ma’am!” He mock saluted, earning a smack to the top of his head this time. You chuckled at the two of them as Bob rubbed the back of his head. He turned to look at you with a scowl at your obvious amusement. “C’mon, I’ll show you your room.”

The night was warm despite the cool breeze blowing in through the window from the ocean, and you chalked it up to the densely populated bar you now found yourself sitting in. You had followed Bob inside, having to grab his hand in order to keep from getting separated amongst the crowd.

“Bob!”

You turned to see a group of five seated at a large table on the far wall next to the patio. The only woman in the group raised her hand to grab his attention, and Bob eagerly dragged you over to them.

“Hey, college boy,” grinned a tanned man with long, curly hair that was slicked back. “How’s it hangin’?”

“More importantly,” said the dark-skinned man across from him, looking at you, “who’s your friend?”

“Guys, this is y/n, my best friend from Duke,” he gestured to you with a grin. “Y/n, this is Mickey, Reuben, Natasha, Javy, and Bradley.”

Each of them waved to you at the mention of their name, and you waved back with a small smile. The mustached one, Bradley, grinned up at you before shuffling over on the bench.

“Ain’t no need to be shy, sunshine,” he winked at you, gesturing to the now open seat next to him. “We’re all friends here.”

You sat down slowly next to him, Bob scooting onto the bench across from you and next to Natasha.

“So, y/n,” she smiled, leaning forward with intrigue clear in her eyes, “where you from?”

“Oh, I’m from Missouri,” you smiled at her.

“Missouri?” Mickey snorted, earning a ribbing from Javy. You chuckled, feeling your cheeks heat up.

“Yeah, it’s not glamorous or anything, but it’s home,” you explained.

Reuben leaned around Bradley to look at you. “So you were in the same major as Bob, right? How did you even get into that?”

“Oh, I’ve always had a fascination with the sea, I guess. Felt like I might have been a mermaid in another life,” you joked, and the group chuckled, earning a look from Bob as you looked around uncertainly. “Did I say something funny?”

“Nah, sunshine,” Bradley grinned. “It’s just cute is all. Imagine you being a little mermaid.”

“In fairness, I was five,” you blushed, and he reached down to pinch your cheek gently.

“Don’t go gettin’ shy on us again,” he drawled. Javy rolled his eyes, taking a sip from the glass of beer in front of him.

“You’re almost putting Jake to shame right now,” he chuckled, causing Mickey and Reuben to both snort. Bob looked around the bar, brow furrowing.

“Speaking of, where is he?” He asked the rest of the group. Bradley let out a low chuckle, resting his arm behind you as Natasha rolled her eyes at the name.

“Mandy has been especially clingy, as of late,” Reuben frowned, peering towards the bar with a pointed look. Bob turned, frowning at what he saw. “Been dropping hints left and right for weeks. She barely leaves his side.”

“Well, yeah,” Bradley scoffed, taking a swig from his bottle. “I’m not surprised since it’s almost time for-”

Natasha cleared her throat, giving a pointed glance to you.

“Almost time for what?” you asked, looking around at the table. No one said a thing, giving small glares at Bradley who shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He cleared his throat and looked down at you, an easy smile spreading across his face.

“I just noticed that you don’t have a drink, sunshine,” he said. “Why don’t you come with me to the bar, and I’ll get you something?”

You gave one last look around the table before nodding slowly. “Yeah, okay. I could use a drink.”

You stood, Bradley close behind you, and you looked over at Bob. “You’re usual?”

“Please,” he said, giving you a tight lipped smile. You returned it softly, following Bradley up to the bar.

“Bradley,” hummed the older woman behind the bar, green eyes narrowing in on him as she saw you next to him.

“Penny,” he smirked, leaning against the counter. She walked over to the two of you, placing a hand on her hip as she frowned at him.

“What can I get you?” She asked him.

“Two beers and?” He turned to you, eyebrow raised.

“A jack and coke, please,” you smiled at her. She returned the gesture warmly, moving to make your drink.

“You best be careful around this one, honey,” she drawled, eyeing the man next to you. “He has a habit of goin’ around breaking hearts.”

“Penny, you wound me,” Bradley cried in mock hurt, gaping mouth quickly turning into another grin. He shot you a wink. “I would never do that to sunshine here.”

Penny snorted, handing him two beers and you your glass. “Right. You’re no better than Seresin over here.”

She jerked her head to the other side of the bar. You followed her gaze, seeing a blond man turn at the sound of his name. He glanced over to where Penny was looking at you and Bradley leaning up against the bar. He had an easy smirk on his face that rivaled Bradley’s, and when he turned his green eyes to you, you swear your heart stopped beating for a moment. His eyes were like sea glass, a frosty, almost moss colored green. It was like the world faded to black around you as you looked at him. You felt something that you could only describe as a tether snapping into place as his eyes bore into yours. If you didn’t know any better, you could have sworn his eyes started glowing as he continued to stare into the very depths of your soul.

“Y/n?”

Your eyes snapped to the side where Bradley was watching you worriedly. You shook the silly thoughts from your head. “I’m sorry, what?”

Bradley chuckled down at you, a hint of worry still tugging at his lips.

“I was just asking if you were ready to head back to the others?”

“Oh,” you trailed off, glancing back at the stranger across the bar. He was still staring at you, face unreadable. The brunette standing next to him looked very put out as he continued to ignore her.

“Jake!” She hissed at him, gripping his jaw and turning his face to look at her. “Are you listening to me?”

Jake looked down at her, a puzzled expression on his face. “Huh?”

“You are so dense sometimes,” she snapped, dropping her hand back to her side. The stranger, Jake, glanced back over at you, and the brunette followed his line of sight, scowling when she saw you. Bradley let out a low whistle before nudging you with his elbow playfully.

“Would sure hate to be him right about now,” he joked, an exaggerated grimace making you giggle. “Mandy is no joke when she’s pissed.”

“Jake!” Mandy shrieked. You chanced another look across the bar. Mandy looked like she was about to blow a fuse as she stared daggers between you and the man at her side. Said man was now frowning, eyes darting between you and Bradley. “I’m talking to you!”

“C’mon, sunshine,” Bradley said with a roll of his eyes at the couple across the bar. “If we stay any longer, I might lose my hearing.”

You followed him back to the table silently, still feeling the heavy weight of two green eyes on your back.

You slept with the window open that night, eager to feel the sea air on your skin as you slept. Your curtains billowed lightly as the moonlight poured into your room. You tossed and turned, trying to find a comfortable position to fall back asleep in. Your bed wasn’t uncomfortable, quite the opposite in fact, so you weren’t sure what had woken you up. You glanced at your phone, the numbers on the screen showing that it was far too early in the morning to still be awake. You huffed out a sigh, listening to the waves as they crashed against the shore below. That was when you heard it.

You weren’t sure what it was at first, it was so unlike anything you had ever experienced. It was a low hum that slowly turned into a lamentful cry amongst the breaking waves. You tossed your blankets back, quickly getting up and padding over to the window. The cry turned into what you could only describe as a song, not too dissimilar to one a whale would make, but this sounded almost…human? You peered out the window, heart racing as you continued to listen to the strange song. You felt a yearning unlike any other crescendo inside of you, calling to you from a distance almost like it wasn’t even your own. Your mind began to feel heavy, hazy with what, you weren’t sure. The song continued, calling to you, begging you to follow. Your eyes grew lidded, skin warm as you felt the call seep into your skin, drowning everything out but the inherent need to obey. You turned, taking a step towards your door.

A dog began to bark, causing you to jump and the song to stop. Shaking the cloudiness from your mind, you looked out the window once again. You caught sight of what you could only describe as a fish’s tail, silver scales gleaming in the moonlight, rising up before disappearing back beneath the waves.

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welcome-leon · 28 days

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Okay I NEED to talk about the Resident Evil 'Viral' campaign bc it makes me insane dfsjkhsdj I'm gonna have to split it up by each commercial to talk about them individually so prepare for longpost but I can't get my mind off it.

If you don't know, Capcom had a series of live-action promo videos for RE5, depicting Chris in various moments following the events of the game. If you haven't seen them, the clearest quality ones I could find are by Shiny Gamey on YT, with the first video being here (otherwise the most popular YT results are 144p - 360p lol)

CW: All videos have lots of intense flashing lights/images, and focus heavily on mental illness. TW: Video 4 "Bridge" has imagery of suicide and self-harm, and video 5 "Back" has hints of suicide.

TLDR; these commercials aren't canon, but god I find them interesting. The videos focus on Chris' rapidly declining mental health and obvious PTSD (alongside hallucinations and psychosis), with each clip showing his sanity deteriorating. They paint a picture where the events of RE5 fundamentally changed Chris in a way he cannot control - more than that, showing him far more vulnerable and human than the determined hero we usually see him as. These commercials make RE5 seem way scarier than it is because it's showing the hero suffering from just surviving - Fear You Can't Forget - and man I wish Capcom would lean further into the psychological horror of it all.

So one thing I noticed with this series is that I think it follows the themes of the stages of grief. I think each of Chris' voiceover lines carry this motif in each video, and it further illustrates just how heavily the events of RE5 are weighing on him. I think it's open to interpretation as to what he's grieving - his own sanity, the lives lost from Wesker's actions, Wesker himself, or maybe just a part of Chris' identity that is so drawn and tired of it all that it simply disappears. Either way, death as a whole is a theme explored here, and I find it very fun and interesting that the stages of grief seem to make an appearance too.

(1) Ceremony

In the first video, Chris is shown accepting an award at a BSAA press event some time after Kijuju. There's a lot of press involved, and Sheva is standing in the crowd. A general (maybe? Some kind of commander) gives a speech about Chris' heroism, and gives him a medal. When Chris is about to give his acceptance speech, the flashing of the cameras trigger a flashback where he re-experiences some of the events of the game (this is just gameplay footage, the 'commercial' part of these videos). You can also see scribbled words, in flashes, appearing across his speech papers. When the flashback ends he drops his papers, and when Sheva picks them up from the ground, the pages have no scribbles visible.

The thing about this one for me, aside from introducing the concept that Chris is Not Okay, is the way Chris' internal monologue contrasts with the words from the general. "There's more to being a hero than saving lives," are the opening words to this scene, spoken by the general, and he goes on to commend Chris for his bravery and valour. The general is very openly calling Chris a hero. And yet, Chris' voiceover line is, "It's amazing how far you can get in life by destroying the lives of others."

While it would make sense for him to be referencing Wesker and bioterrorism as a whole, contextually it's apparent that he's referring to himself - by the last video, it's made clear that Chris' voice lines are all a part of one monologue, but I'll get to that later. Here, he is on stage receiving a medal after ending innumerable lives in Kijuju, and while his superiors call it 'saving' lives, Chris calls it 'destroying'. The way he says the line sounds dull, emotionless, and it sounds clear he has no pride in the lives he takes, BOWs or not. I just love that detail to his character, his awareness of his own role in ending the lives of the victims of bioterrorism, the fact that he still views the monsters he kills as lives taken. It feels very canon-Chris to me, despite not being a canon video.

It's also worth noting that shock and denial are considered the first stages of grief, and while it's not a big theme in this clip as much as the others, I still think his voice line showcases his disbelief. It definitely sounds like he can't believe the route his life has taken to lead him onto that stage. Maybe it's not a lot to sink your teeth into, thematically, but there's elements here that contribute to the theme of grief in the video series overall.

(2) Date

This commercial shows Chris on a date with a woman, and it seems like everything is going well. The woman reapplies her lipstick in a compact, while Chris gets a video camera and asks the woman to confess something (side note, Chris wtf sjkdfhkjh). The woman tells him, "I don't know, I'm probably guilty of something." She moves the compact she's holding and Chris has a flashback when light reflects off the mirror into his eyes. When he comes back, the woman is gone, and Chris finds the napkin the woman was using covered in words similar to the first commercial written in lipstick. The voiceover line is, "Death is nothing to be proud of. And survival is sometimes worse than death."

Guilt and pain is the second stage of grief, and I think both are very apparent here. The woman is about to record her confession, and she states she's probably guilty of something - it stands to reason Chris might be thinking of his own confessions, his own guilt. And Chris' internal monologue, after a flashback of violence and death, says, "Death is nothing to be proud of," implying that it's something to feel ashamed of. Again, the point is hammered home that Chris doesn't view his experience in Kijuju as something heroic - he is constantly aware of the weight of death, regardless of who he kills. This line is also spoken alongside the visual of Chris looking into a broken mirror, a symbol of his shattered sense of self, which only amplifies the idea that Chris really feels like he has lost part of himself - is it part of his identity, or his sanity? Both? Probably both.

"And survival is sometimes worse than death." Is Chris talking about believing the psychological effects of RE5 are a fate worse than death? I think so. He's just had a flashback and lost a date that was otherwise going really well because of it, and keeps seeing these words popping up in places they weren't before. It's this line that encompasses his pain, right beside his guilt as it should be. The fact that he's viewing his existence after RE5 as being 'worse than death' is a very potent thing, considering that he should be feeling somewhat normal now that he's back in his real life.

And that's what strikes me the most about these videos - the idea that despite all the horrors we see these characters experience in the games, despite the fact that the good guys always win, despite the fact that these missions always have a beginning and an end, it's the aftermath of the game events that are worse. The idea that even with everything Chris has gone through, in these videos he's telling us that his own brain is worse. I find it chilling, and very compelling.

(3) Claire

This scene shows Chris and Claire hunting an enemy through a factory. Chris' voiceover line is, "Why did I have to go? Why couldn't it have been someone else?" The siblings shoot the enemy and it falls, and it appears as though they're in some kind of mission training. They have the following conversation.

Claire: "So. I heard that the company shrink thought—" Chris: "So Claire Redfield listens to shrinks now?" Claire: "I'm just asking how my big brother's doing, you jerk." Chris: "Don't worry about me, I don't need any saving." Chris then has a voiceover line: "But I do need to be saved."

A target startles them and Claire shoots, the muzzle flash and the glint of the bullets sending Chris into a flashback. When he comes back to himself, the word Kijuju is written on the wall behind Claire in what looks like blood. Chris mutters "No, no," to himself when he sees it, visibly frightened, but Claire can't see what he's seeing. She asks if he's okay. The tagline plays, and the final clip is Chris staring at his own hands with the training mannequin in the background.

Oh boy, Chris thinking "Why couldn't it have been someone else?" really gets me 😥 Chris has already been through so much, and I could be wrong but I'm not sure if he's ever expressed his displeasure at the direction his life has taken before (in the previous instalments of the franchise, I mean). A big part of Chris' character is his steadiness, his guidance of others, and his determination to see the mission through. He's always so reliable in everyone's eyes that for him to be overwhelmed with the burden of responsibility is just so... ugh. And it's literally shown in this same clip, where he states outright to Claire that he doesn't need saving, then his inner monologue directly disproves that. His thoughts are crying out for someone to help him, and yet he resolutely takes action that goes against his own wants. Does he do that because he thinks he can't ask for help? Does he think he doesn't deserve it?

The third stage of grief is bargaining and anger, and it really shows in his voice line. Him asking "why me?" doesn't come from a place of petulance or entitlement, it comes from a place of pain. A sense of anger at the circumstances leading to the loss is a normal part of grief, and bargaining is a way for the brain to try and gain a sense of control over an uncontrollable situation. The fact that he has those kinds of thoughts at all just shows how much pain he's actually in - we all know he would never let anyone else go find Jill and Wesker on his behalf, that's just not who Chris is. And yet, he falls into the natural mindset of trying to retroactively bargain like any of us would. If he hadn't gone to Kijuju, then he wouldn't be feeling this way. If it had been someone else, then he wouldn't need saving. Why did it have to be him?

And then there's the ending, a solid confirmation in this series that Chris is hallucinating the word Kijuju over and over again. His past haunting him, not just in flashbacks but in reality too. Idk man, I know Resident Evil isn't a psychological horror series and it's probably intentional for them to make that distinction from other survival horror games (e.g. Silent Hill) but this kind of stuff is so spooky and I love it. The fact that this is a promotion for the game is so incredibly smart to me, because it makes the viewer wonder at what Chris possibly could have experienced for him to be reacting this way in the aftermath - Chris, who has only ever been shown to be very competent, calm, and determined. Ugh. So good.

(4) Bridge (TW talk of suicide and self-harm)

The clip opens with the sounds of an engine and some frantic driving. His VO line is, "I hope there's something waiting for me out there." Chris stops his truck on top of a bridge and approaches the railing. He looks out for a moment, then climbs up onto the edge. "No matter how hard I try, I just can't seem to escape my memories." The flashing light of an alarm triggers a flashback. When he comes to, he's sitting near his truck. His jacket is gone, and he's shaking. He sees his fingers are covered in blood, and when he looks at his arm he sees Kijuju scratched into his skin. "I guess the more horrors that get seared into your brain, the less likely you are to forget."

I was not prepared when I first saw this one, let me tell you, and I still get sad watching it 😔 The imagery speaks for itself I think, and it pretty solidly captures the fourth stage of grief, depression. It appears Chris drove to the bridge with the intent to take his own life, and it was actually the flashback that brought him back from the edge. It very much encompasses his line, "No matter how hard I try, I just can't seem to escape my memories." He is quite literally trying to escape his memories, his life, and it is quite literally his memories that prevent him from doing so.

The first part of his voice line for this commercial seems to be his hope for an afterlife? And that kinda just hits home even further - he hopes there's something better waiting for him, something far away from the memories. Although, considering the rest of the series and the guilt he clearly feels, maybe he hopes for absolution. Maybe he hopes for his sins to be punished. Hm.

As a little note, I have no idea if the Kijuju on his arm was meant to be scratches or not. It looks like it's been painted on, but his fingernails are bloody and there's dripping blood, so he obviously got the blood from somewhere. It could also be a hallucination, like the other written words. Unclear. But it takes the decline of his mental health to a whole new level - not only is he suicidal, he's also harming himself in his fugue state. Poor Chris :(

(5) Back (TW talk of suicide)

The final commercial begins with Chris' voice. "There are some things you can't run from. And there are some things that never die." The camera pans over a room filled with items that seem to resemble parts of RE5, including statues and plants. It's unclear where this is, but it seems like Chris is living there. Chris is sitting, clothed, in a bathtub, talking into a receiver. "The human brain is a complicated bitch; once an image is burned in, it's scarred there forever."

The TV screen in front of the tub randomly turns on, and Chris grabs a handgun from beside him to shoot the TV, which triggers a flashback. Sheva runs through the area and pulls him up from the tub, where he had slumped over facedown in the water throughout his flashback, and he aims at her with the pistol before he realises who she is. She grabs him a towel and tells him, "We got a new assignment." Chris gets up and appears to be himself again, getting ready for the mission while Sheva looks at the walls covered obsessively in writing. Over and over, it reads, They are in Kijuju. It's clear she can see it this time. As they leave the area, Chris' voice line is, "I can't keep letting my memories get the best of me. Luckily, the best way to get rid of old memories is by making new ones."

So there's a lot going on here I'm not fully certain about tbh. I think this is meant to be Chris' home, or at least a current place of residence. The way the place is decorated makes me think Chris is so far gone in his memories that he's started making the area around him mimic Kijuju, with all the plants growing off the walls and the sculptures. The fact that the place looks like an abandoned factory is unexplained though. Chris is sitting in the bathtub talking into a recording device; it looks to me like a landline phone, and I suspect he's recording a voicemail. That, alongside the handgun next to him on the tub leads me to believe he's recording a suicide note - and it seems like all the voice lines in the previous videos are all part of this one recording.

The final stage of grief is acceptance, but I think this video turns that acceptance on its head a bit. "Some things you can't run from, and some things never die." The lines themselves make him seem accepting of his own memories, of the fact that these events will haunt him - in the context of the clip though, his possible second suicide attempt, maybe he's trying to explain to someone why he couldn't try to attempt to live with the memories. And yet, the moment Sheva tells him they have a new mission, he's up and back on his feet, Chris Redfield once more, and with the final voice line things are ostensibly all fixed again. Acceptance. Sure.

But there's no real resolution (not that I would expect one in a commercial series like this) and it would defy the core intent of these videos for Chris to be All Okay again. He's not okay after RE5 - that's the point. Fear you can't forget. What the viewer needs to know is that Chris Redfield is going to carry on and do the next mission like he always does, and isn't that just the sad truth of Chris' entire character? It's that exact theme that leads to Chris' weariness in RE8, asking himself when it all ends. Despite the final lines that seem to shoehorn the entire series in a neat package, I think the fact that despite his clear mental health issues he still gets up and gets the job done is far more telling about the tragedy of Chris' character.

The writing on the walls really makes me think. They are in Kijuju. 'They' being Wesker and Jill, but it's odd that Chris would obsess over that specifically after RE5, seeing as he's already saved Jill and killed Wesker. But then it makes me wonder about those 3 years Chris was looking for them. 'They are in Kijuju' would literally be the thought that started it all, the reason why the events of RE5 happened in the first place. 'They are in Kijuju' would be an obsession, even in his right frame of mind. He'd spent so long looking for Jill that this phrase being seared into his mind makes sense to me. (I mean obviously this would moreso be a big teaser for fans to understand what RE5 is likely to be about, but still.)

Idk man, these clips, while not being canon, fill a void for me about Chris' wellbeing after everything he's been through. He's experienced so much, carried so much, that to see him truly suffer in the aftermath of such a gruelling mission is just kind of cathartic? He's human, and his body and mind aren't infallible. He might be able to make it through the toughest experiences alive, but that doesn't mean there are no consequences. And frankly I just love this approach to promoting a horror game - showing the aftermath is such a smart way to do it. "Look at how the protagonist reacts to living through the RE5 experience! Don't you wanna know what caused it?" That's just good marketing.

Anyway to anyone who made it this far - thanks and hope you enjoyed my rambles 😅🥰

#oh boy this got away from meeee #this was meant to be like 2 paragraphs at most #I hope it makes sense? I jsut find these clips so interesting and maybe yall will too 💗#gonna post this before I get too nervous byeee #rotposts #also side note: Chris in that first pic in those boots?? hello 👀

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yanderes-galore · 1 year

Note

I absolutely love ratchet so may I request yandere ratchet with a human prompt 53

I love Ratchet too :) I'd love to give you a small story about him and a human! I assumed you meant my prompts.

You gave no specific Ratchet so I just did his Prime appearance.

Note: I've been doing a lot of late night writing so I apologize if this is unorganized. This is essentially me being half asleep and indulging in my favorite character. It's content purely from the heart I guess, lol. I tried to keep up the plot so I hope it came out... coherent :)

Yandere! TFP! Ratchet Prompt 53

"I left you a few voice mails, why didn't you pick up?"

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Paranoia, Overprotective behavior, Cybertronian/Human pair, Manipulation, Implied kidnapping, Dubious relationship, Deception.

Ratchet didn't used to like humans at first. He was already having to deal with three kids causing trouble in the base. When he met you, a young adult human, he wasn't sure what to think.

Turns out... you were tolerable. You genuinely wished to help out and keep the kids in line. Although even they seemed to be a handful for you.

Ratchet was still a bot who was hard to get along with at first due to his stubborn behavior. Despite this... Ratchet had begun to soften towards you over time. He began not to dislike humans all that much with time.

Honestly, it was you and the kids who helped him change his outlook.

When it came to you and Ratchet, you two could be considered partners. While Bulkhead had Miko, Bumblebee had Raf, and Arcee had Jack... Ratchet had you. Ratchet didn't think he'd ever have a human companion, he didn't even think he'd be attached...

Then he found you.

Ratchet had grown close to you because you provided companionship for him at the base. While the others were on a mission and he was meant to prepare Ground Bridges, you sat by his desk. You didn't talk unless he talked first when you were still getting to know each other.

Yet, soon Ratchet began looking forward to hearing your voice and seeing your small organic form. You just... provided him a sense of comfort. Your presence only ever proved useful when Ratchet began to stress himself out over the others.

A comment that was often tossed around was you being his emotional support. When Optimus wasn't around, Ratchet had you. You could say Ratchet cared for you at the very least.

Your companionship was different from the others. While when it came to the kids their respective Autobots acted like guardians... you and Ratchet were different. Your connection was beyond that of a guardian.

Sure, Ratchet was always protective, but it seemed like it was for different reasons. You never really knew how deep his attachment to you went yet it always felt different. You always seemed to ease him when you were around.

It wasn't hard to theorize what Ratchet really felt towards you. His softness around you felt intimate despite the differences between your species. It's some form of love, even if Ratchet never admits it.

This explanation felt the most plausible. It explained why Ratchet felt a yearning to connect with you more. Although such a feat only managed to frustrate him at times...

Your biological/biomechanical differences make it hard for him to display affection. He can only ever do small things. He can hold you, take you on drives, call you, talk to you, and he loves it but...

Intimacy, the thing he craves, is what upsets him at times when he looks at you.

Normally the thought might have repulsed him. The thought of hugging you or showing affection in the more romantic sense towards a human should be seen as foreign. Yet he wants it with you.

Such feelings are what's made Ratchet become more attached to you than a guardian. Based on how you act so positively around him, even when he picks you up... part of him hopes you feel the same. Surely... you won't mind being in a relationship with an old Cybertronian like him, would you?

He promises to himself he'll find a way to make an avatar to communicate with you with in the future.

The issue is, these feelings can also be seen as a weakness. Ratchet often grows distressed when you are away from him for too long. Yes, humans have their own lives to attend to...

He just wishes you'd spend more of your time at the base?

Ratchet didn't often talk about his problems, yet with you he felt it was important to voice his concerns. As a result you had given him a way to contact you when you're in your home. A phone number... one he often contacted.

He really didn't need the childish teasing, Primus he could hear it now. 'Ratchet's got a crush on a human'. He rolls his optics just thinking about it.

Yes, he loves you...yet it's normal. It has to be. He hasn't had a partner in a long time, if at all. Maybe he... wants to try something like that with you.

For now, Ratchet tried to focus on your safety. When he can find a way he'll share his romantic feelings with you. When he can properly convey them....

Gaining a way to talk to you made Ratchet relax a bit more. It gave him comfort whenever you texted him or gave him a call. Some say you can see Ratchet's mood change when you were on the phone. He physically relaxes his stance at the thought of you being safe and sound.

Optimus notices this change in his friend and his thought is he's happy for Ratchet. His friend has managed to find solace in a human like the others. Even if it's in a different way.

Being able to contact you is a double edged sword with Ratchet. While he's calmer with hearing your voice or seeing your texts, he appears snappy if he hasn't heard from you. Ratchet is never far from a way to contact you.

It's obsessive.

Ratchet would look distant when you don't respond right away, often looking at the screen with a frown. He hated being away from you at times. But you're busy with your own life and he is busy with his.

You'd soon learn not picking up when Ratchet calls is a mistake. Take a nap or go to work and Ratchet gets anxious. He expects you to pick up.

It would be so much easier if you were just right next to him...

He hopes he can do that some day once he perfects his hologram avatar technology.

---

"I left you a few voice mails, why didn't you pick up?"

Ratchet's gruff voice echoes through your phone. You had been away from your phone for a few hours and came back to voice mails of worried Ratchet. You originally thought it funny that he never wanted to be away from you for long, now it was concerning.

"I was busy, Ratchet..."

"Busy, huh? You're supposed to have your phone on you."

"What did I even miss? You know I have to have my own life here, right?"

Ratchet's silent on the phone, most likely grumbling to himself.

"Yeah yeah, I know. I have reasons to worry, however."

"Decepticons?"

"Yes. I don't know what I'd do if they got their hands on you."

"Nothing's going to happen, Ratchet!"

"You don't KNOW that...."

There's silence on the phone again before Ratchet speaks again. You swore you heard him sigh deeply.

"I want you back at the base."

"Why?"

"Security reasons. Decepticons in the area."

Something about his voice sounds off. His response is curt, almost rehearsed. You push it aside, thinking he's just irritated.

"Really? Alright...."

"Don't worry too much, I'd never let them touch you. I'm picking you up. Wait there, okay?"

"Ratchet, You never usually leave the base that often. Shouldn't you send one of the oth-"

"They're busy. I'd prefer it if... I brought you here, is that okay with you?"

"Sure, Ratchet. Be careful."

Ratchet says nothing, but your words affected him greatly. He appreciated the fact you cared for him like he cared for you. He hangs up on you and you cautiously wait for him. Decepticons in the area?

Were you really in that much danger?

---

It felt wrong to lie to you about a Decepticon threat. Yet Ratchet reassured himself that it could happen at any point in time. Just calling you wasn't enough.

As Ratchet drove back to the base with you in the front seat, he thought deeply about what he was doing. How long could he lie before he told you how he really felt? How long until you realize there's no real threat at this time.

Like a Decepticon, Ratchet had lied to you to get what he wants.

It felt dirty. Despite this, Ratchet could only think about you in his front seat. He could tell you were concerned.

He hoped you could forgive him for this. At the base you provide him such comfort. No one else could make him feel such a way. If he kept you there... he wouldn't have to worry. He could think about himself just this time, yeah?

Hopefully his little project would be done soon and he could convince you to stay. He could make you your own little area in the base and interact with you with a little avatar. In his eyes, you'd be a much happier human with his care.

He had his reasons and ways to have you understand him. You can't fully blame him when you learn the truth, could you? Decepticons were a threat, even if they weren't right at this tick.

This was the best way to care for you. He loves you... this would be beneficial to the both of you. You'll be safe and he'll have you.

While it may feel wrong to betray your trust now, it would yield results in the future. Ratchet stops once he rolls into the base and lets you out. After he transforms, Ratchet picks you up in his hands.

He can't hide the grin on his face when he looks at you.

You may not know it yet, but he knows you'll be so much happier beside him rather than alone.

"I'll make sure the Decepticons don't harm a hair on your head... you can relax, I'm here now."

#yandere transformers #yandere transformers prime #yandere tfp #yandere tfp ratchet #yandere ratchet #yandere transformers ratchet

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makeste · 10 months

Note

do you perhap have bakugou whump fic recs?

I have many such recs! not all of them are "whump" in the purest sense of the word, but they've got angst and hurt/comfort in abundance, so yeah.

I also have an older rec post from like five years ago which has quite a few Bakugou whump fics as well, so I'll link that here.

and here are like 16 new ones lol.

some quick notes:

I'm just including links and summaries here, so please make sure to check the tags for each fic if you have certain squicks or triggers you're trying to avoid!

please be aware that I am not very nitpicky about grammar and style and spelling and the like, so long as I'm feeling the characterization and general vibes. so while I can't promise that all of these fics will read like Nobel Prize-winning lit, I can say that I personally enjoyed each one enough to go back and reread more than once.

although it tends to be one of the most common tropes in Bakugou angst fics, I do not vibe with the "abusive Mitsuki" angle, so you won't find any of that in the works below. same goes for Midnight-bashing (which is also surprisingly common).

I also did not include any fics with sad endings just because I didn't feel like depressing myself today lol.

I don't think there are manga spoilers in any of these fics except one (which I noted and marked with an asterisk), but definitely check the tags just to be safe.

lastly, though I'm by no means a prude when it comes to fanfic, all of these particular fics are SFW, just FYI.

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gen Bakuwhump:

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It's Already Tomorrow on the Other Side of the World by Nicole_Silverwolf

In the absolute immediate aftermath of his rescue at Kamino, Bakugou just wants to sleep. If he sleeps then this nightmare will be over. Except he's freezing in the mid August heat. And he can't stop shaking. A glimpse of two imperfect humans trying their best told in 3.5 parts.

post-Kamino Dadzawa and Katsuki. easily one of my all-time favorite BnHA fics. it's so sad and cozy.

Coming Up for Air by achievingelysium

Katsuki has nightmares. He doesn't think he deserves the comfort, but Aizawa-sensei sits with him anyway.

more Dadzawa dealing with nighttime Kacchan angst, since that's like my #1 BnHA fic aesthetic. this is so well-written. like, there are a couple of lines in here that just... guh. just hit right to the core of me.

Bakugou's "Super Fun" Three Day Vacation by Marvelless

Bakugou and his parents arrive home after the Kamino Ward incident for some much-needed recovery time.

post-Kamino Bakufam angst. lots of paranoia and dissociation. this is one of those fics that's sort of a guilty pleasure for me, because Katsuki definitely feels a lot more... fragile?... in this than I think he would have been in canon. but he's still enough of a grump during all of his spiralling that it still feels like him. and I do love me some Bakufam wholesomeness, and this fic has got that in spades.

the art of poor judgement by emelinelou

It's a Tuesday when Bakugou admits to himself that maybe, maybe he is sorta, kinda under the weather. Things go quickly downhill from there. . Alternatively: Bakugou's too stubborn to be "sick," Midoriya and Kirishima are in over their heads, Todoroki is the Most Useful in a pinch, and Aizawa is not paid nearly enough for this.

probably my favorite sickfic. chapter two especially. Bakugou's narration in this is fucking fantastic. he's so fucking done with life. meanwhile everyone around him is freaking out, and he himself is a complete mess even though he won't acknowledge it, and it's just great. it's equal parts funny, sad, and absolutely adorable.

(incidentally, even though this fic is marked as incomplete, it really doesn't feel that way and ends at a perfectly reasonable stopping point, so don't let that put you off.)

Solar Flare by TheQueen

Three weeks after Katsuki Bakugou receives his quirk, he takes a short tumble off a bridge and watches, dumbfounded, as stupid Deku extend a hand. Don’t take it, the universe commands. Don’t tell me what to do! Katsuki snaps.

this is a really cool AU in which Baby Katsuki accidentally starts defying the universe and ignoring his predestined path, which has a profound ripple effect on his life. sort of like a time-travel fix-it, minus the time travel. also just a heads up that Bakugou is like five years old in this so I guess it's technically a kidfic. and there is plenty of angst, a little bit of whump, more Bakufam, and plenty of baby Kacchan and Deku being cute like it's their job.

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BKDK/DKBK whump:

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lose it all (with eyes wide open) by ghostwriterofthemachine

Katsuki is blinded. Izuku is muted. Both of them are kidnapped. Things get worse.

this is one of those fics that just kind of leaves you stunned at how freaking good it is. featuring: psychological mindgames, hopelessly bleak situations, and codependency so utterly raw and desperate that it broke my heart roughly 17 times.

When Ice Doesn't Float by Ma_skee

A simple rescue exercise goes south when Izuku falls through the ice and it goes from a class assinment to an actual rescue and a race against time to keep him from freezing to death.

technically this is more Dekuwhump than Kacchanwhump (though we do get a bit of the latter toward the end), but I'd argue that few things could possibly stress Katsuki out more than being in a tense survival situation in which Deku is hurt and needs help. anyway so yeah. this is classic hurt/comfort and very good.

spinning out of control by mollE

Katsuki joins the 'I've Been Mind Controlled' Club. He wishes he hadn't.

please see above re: how all Dekuwhump scenarios are secretly Kacchanwhump scenarios in disguise. anyway so basically a mind-controlled Bakugou beats the shit out of Deku while being fully aware of it the entire time, and has a complete (and understandable) emotional breakdown afterwards.

all that you ever wanted from me was sweet nothing by maxisnotokay

Izuku has had this thing about him that Katsuki has never been able to name, but he's been chasing it since he learned how to run. It takes a catastrophic building collapse during their third year and a severe concussion for him to realize what it is. Aizawa loses ten years off his life. When does he not.

gotta love a good building collapse fic. this one has a concussed Katsuki, a very worried Izuku, and the usual "thanks to this intimate life-or-death situation, I have belatedly realized some fundamental truths about the nature of our relationship" tropes. but it's good. a lot of really good banter and back-and-forth dialogue in this one too.

takes one to know one by Sour_Idealist

Deku has left UA. Ochako still looks for him in unguarded moments. Bakugo is, unsurprisingly, being a jerk.

some good emotional hurt/comfort post-Jakku. Ochako has a chat with Bakugou about Deku. specifically, Bakugou's feelings toward Deku. it's good shit.

*fear is the heart of love by nikkiRA

*please be advised this fic contains major manga spoilers!!

Bakugou gets hit by a quirk that amplifies his greatest fear for 24 hours.

losing Deku. the thing that scares him the most is losing Deku. this is a good fic. emotional hurt/comfort for days. though once again do keep in mind that there are a couple of major spoilers in this.

silence is what i do best by notreally

the one where both Izuku and Katsuki were hit with a truth serum sort of quirk, and things aren't going all too well.

not just a truth-telling quirk, but a truth-compulsion quirk, to the extent that (spoiler alert) the quirk causes them physical pain and distress if they don't speak the truth. which, as you can imagine, leads to all sorts of extremely vulnerable conversations and a lot of good h/c.

close by not quite by blossomshed

When Bakugou goes after a beacon during a class-wide rescue op, he doesn't expect to find Deku - or to find himself dealing with the fallout of a gift he doesn't want, and a side of himself he'd never bothered to examine. He deals with it nonetheless.

this fic is so dear to me. it's yet another "Deku transfers OFA to Bakugou fic", but it's just so fucking good. and it also features a (very much confused) ace Bakugou, which is such a rare find. there are lines from this fic which I still think about constantly. it's funny and profound and adorable and so wonderfully IC, please go read it.

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BONUS NON-ANGSTY FICS because I just felt like ending this list with some happy stories where Kacchan gets a lot of love:

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give me compliments (i said give me compliments) by wonhaebunny

“It’s just cute,” Ashido is telling them as she walks into the classroom. “Like, when you compliment someone and they get flustered so easily, don’t you think it’s endearing?” Kaminari blinks. “Like Bakugou?” he asks slowly. - 1-a realises that katsuki is really, really bad at receiving compliments. exposure therapy ensues.

he is bad at accepting compliments. this is a very, very cute fic.

The Friendship Ladder by nikkiRA

Bakugou and Kirishima tell their classmates they're dating, but everyone seems more interested in who gets to claim the newly vacated spot of Bakugou’s best friend.

as the summary implies this is technically KRBK, but the focus here is very much class 1-A as a whole. there's just something about seeing the entirety of the class squabbling over their Kacchan love that tickles me to no end. Deku is also fantastic in this lmao.

The Yoshida Trail by WinterSwallow

Mitsuki Bakugo returns with her gift to the mountain.

last but not least we have this gorgeous character study with a criminally low view count. Mitsuki climbs Mt. Fuji with an eight-year-old Katsuki in tow, as the fic explores his childhood and young adulthood through a series of vignettes. the insights in this really have no business being as profound as they are, given that they're voiced from the perspective of one of the most graceless characters in the series as she observes her equally graceless son through all the ups and downs and tumbles of his life. but somehow that just makes the whole thing even better. idk I just really love this a lot.

---

anyway that's it for now. hope at least a few of these are enjoyable. thanks for the ask!

#bakugou katsuki #bakudeku #bkdk #fic recs #bnha fic recs #bnha #boku no hero academia #makeste reads bnha

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justmeinadaze · 2 years

Text

Good Neighbors Part 8 (Steddie X Reader)

A/N: Alright! Lol I warned y'all and I was told to bring it so prepare for the feels. My note to single moms out there... ya'll are amazing and deserve so much love <3 This did take me a hot minute to write mostly because it tapped into something for me but it felt good. I feel good getting this out there.

Warning: Steddie relationship here and all that that implies (I regret nothing!) The major trigger here is the custody issue between Charlie and her. They do hash it out and there is a resolution when it comes to that. Dylan does open up to our boys. That may be triggering for some but its nothing drastic.

Word count: 5412

Your eyes glanced through the glass partition at Eddie who was sitting in the hallway, bouncing his leg anxiously as he waited for you to finish mediation with your ex and the lawyers. Both he and Steve insisted after what happened last month that one of them be with you or Dylan if Charlie was around.

You son didn’t seem bothered by the fact that he hadn’t gone over to his father’s house. Eddie and Steve did what they could to keep him preoccupied. One night he had asked if he could call Charlie but when you dialed his number he didn’t answer.

“Baby, I’m sorry.”, you reached out and stroked his hair as the boy shrugged his shoulders.

“It’s ok, mommy.”

“Dylan…how would you feel if you didn’t have to see your dad as much? It doesn’t have to be permanent. Just until daddy isn’t so busy?”

“But I don’t see him now. What would be different?”

Sometimes this kid said things that just flabbergasted you. He was aware of much more than you gave him credit for.

“Nothing, I guess.” Dylan turned to smile at you before turning his eyes back to the tv.

“This is fucking ridiculous. He’s my son!”, Charlie’s hand slammed down on the table.

Your lawyer gestured towards him. “See, this is the kind of behavior we are worried about. Besides the father’s absence, he seems to have anger issues that need to be put in check.”

His lawyer leaned over to whisper things in his ear as Charlie glared at you. The gentleman straightened up as he spoke. “Look, there has to be some leeway here so we don’t have to hash this out in a courtroom. He isDylan’s father.”

Your lawyer scoffs. “Biologically. Honestly, if we need to take this to court, we are more than willing to go down that route. We have pictures, texts, and proof of missed weekends. It would be much simpler on everyone, including the child, if he just signs this document now.”

His lawyer sighs, leaning back in his chair. “The father here has an actual home for the child in a safe environment—”

“And my client’s apartment doesn’t count as a safe home? Come on, Bryan.”

“Lidia, we have proof that the people across from your client are extremely violent—”

“They are not violent.”, you seethe.

“Oh, please. One of them broke my nose!”, Charlie shouts at you.

“AFTER you grabbed me and threatened me!”

“Okay!”, your lawyer reaches for your arm, leaning you back in your chair.

“The point is,” Bryan continues, “We have a case here to.”

“I guess we’ll see you in court than. As it stands a judge approved our filing and Dylan doesn’t have to go to his father’s unless his mother allows it until after we get this resolved.” Lidia sighs, pressing her fingers to the bridge of her nose. “Now as for finalizing the divorce itself—”

“I’m not signing anything until this shit with my son is in order.”

Your lawyer’s eyes shift to his own. “I would advise him against that.”

“Oh, why? Is she getting married sometime soon?”

“Well gee, Charles. I guess I’m not like you. You started dating again before we even broke up!”

Your lawyer starts to gather her paperwork, motioning for you to stand. “I guess we’re done here then. Bryan, call me if he changes his mind which again, I highly recommend he does when it comes to finalizing and Dylan.” She pulls you as you both head out the door. Eddie immediately rises, following behind you both into the lobby and out in the parking lot.

“I’m sorry, honey.” She smiles as she leans in for a hug. “I was hoping we could at least get the divorce resolved today but…”, Lidia shakes her head. “I’ll call you later and we can talk about where we go from here and court dates, ok?”

“Thank you, Lid.” She rubs your arm reassuringly as she grins at Eddie and turns to head for her car.

###################

“Okay, so the boot transports them anywhere they want to go?”, Steve looks at Dylan as the boy nods. “But why? They have brooms, that fireplace thing, and a flying car.”

“The car doesn’t work, Steve.”

The sound of your son giggling immediately calms you down as you and Eddie walk through your apartment door. “Oh my god. How did you get Steve to sit down and watch Harry Potter?”

“Hey mom! Hi Eddie. I asked him nicely.”

“Never works for me.” Eddie playfully rolls his eyes.

“When have you ever asked me nicely for anything?”

“That’s fair.” The metalhead chuckles as his eyes watch you walk towards your fridge, grab a beer, and plop your body down on a chair in the living room. He and Steve have a silent conversation with their faces. “Sooo… who else is hungry because I am starving.”

“I could eat.”

Eddie jumps overdramatically. “Sorry, Princess. You got too excited there. Startled me out of my skin.”

Dylan laughs as you scrunch your nose and smile. “Can we go to the pizza place that has the indoor playground?” When you nod your head, he jumps up, and runs in his room to get his shoes.

“You okay?”, Steve’s concerned eyes scan over you.

“Yeah, I’m fine. I’m going to go change into something more comfortable.” Your words didn’t match your tone and they knew it. What were you going to do though? You felt like you couldn’t afford to not be ok right now.

#############

“Can I go play?”

“Nope, you have to sit with the adults and talk about… I don’t know…taxes.”

Dylan narrows his eyes at you as he makes a funny pouty face with his lips.

“Yup because that’s all adults do is talk about taxes.” Eddie makes a ridiculous face at you as well, laughing at your comment.

“Yes, my angel. Go play.” You watch him as he shuffles out of the booth and makes his way towards the outside playground.

“I heard the douchebag was in full asshole mode today.” Your eyes shift towards Steve before landing on Eddie.

“I thought those rooms were soundproof.”

“To a point, Sweetheart. Even if he wasn’t shouting at you, his body language didn’t really radiate calm.”

You fold your arms across your chest feeling that mask you put up for your son start to disappear. “I just want this to be over.”, you whisper.

Steve slides out from his side of the table and comes to sit beside you, wrapping his arm around your grumbling frame.

“What was his excuse this time?”

“He won’t sign anything until ‘this matter with Dylan is taken care of.”

Eddie scoffs, folding his own arms as he leaned back in the booth. “What the fuck? It’s not like he cares. He never shows up for his weekends. He doesn’t pay child support. I don’t get it!”

“Munson…” Steve reaches his other arm out to try and calm his friend down.

“It just pisses me off, Harrington. The least he could do is let her go. Couldn’t even do that when they were married. That’s why he cowardly went behind her back with what’s her name.”

“Eddie!” Steve’s stern voice startled you both. “Come on, dude. Not right now.”, his tone came out much softer as he eyes gestured towards you.

Eddie reached across the table for your hand and when you placed it in his he tenderly kissed the back of it. “I’m sorry. It just makes me angry. You both don’t deserve the hell he puts you through.”

“What I don’t understand is what case does he even have to think he can win in court?”, Steve asked.

You pulled out of his embrace so you could look at them both. “He’s, uh, arguing that my home environment isn’t safe for Dylan.” They genuinely laugh.

“That’s the most insane thing I’ve ever heard.”

“For real. Good luck proving that.” Eddie takes a swig of the beer in front of him.

“He does have pictures… of a broken nose and busted lip after leaving my apartment.

It feels as if all the air has exited the room. Your gaze shifts between them as they come to the realization of what you were saying.

“He was hurting you.” Steve looks down at the table. “I don’t regret it but—”

“We would regret if that was the reason you lost your son.”, Eddie finished for him.

You let out a small laugh trying to lighten the conversation. “Hey, uh, he also said he didn’t need to sign the divorce papers anytime soon because I’m not getting married.” Eddie smiles as Steve chuckles under his breath. “What would that even look like? Would my name be hyphened? Y/N Harrington-Munson?”

“Pfft. Munson- Harrington flows better.”

You look down at your hands nervously. “I know there’s a lot going on so we don’t have to talk about this now but I was thinking, maybe, we could look into getting you guys some kind of legal rights for him. I mean I know we can’t technically get married or I don’t even know but I know you love Dylan and he loves you. If anything ever happened to me I would want him to be with you two.”

When you finally look up, you notice they are both beaming at you with wide smiles. “I think that was both the cutest and sweetest thing I’ve ever heard.” Eddie giggles as he looks at Steve.

“Definitely.” Steve pulls you to him, kissing your temple.

“Yeah, yeah. We would also have to talk to the kid but—”

“Talk about what?”, Dylan skids into view as he reaches for his glass and chugs back the water inside.

“I said ‘the kid’. I didn’t say it was you. Ugh.” You make a face as you wipe the sweat from his forehead. You act like you’re going to wipe on Steve’s shoulder. He lightly grabs your wrist, bending out of the way. You son laughs as he climbs up next to Eddie.

“Are you done talking about Texas?”

“Taxes, dork. Yes, the adults are done talking about taxes.”

################

Almost as if detecting the mood, a pretty bad storm hit Hawkins. The four of you made it home just as the first heavy drops started hit.

Eddie gripped Dylan’s shoulder, pulling him to his side. “Don’t be scared, dude.”

“I’m not scared. I’m not a baby!”

“Oh, well excuse me. Hold me then because I’m scared.” Your son laughed as he ran after you, following you into your room. You could hear Eddie giggling with Steve in the living room. “Did you see that? Kid just abandoned me.”

You hand Dylan some candles as you both come back out and set them around the room lighting them. There’s a loud crack of thunder before the lights flicker and shut off.

“Well, shit.” You smack Steve’s chest as you and Dylan settle down on the floor with his head opposite yours. “Um, what’s going on here?”

“This is something we do when the power is out.” You hand you son your phone and he turns on the flashlight, pointing it towards the ceiling. Steve and Eddie look up to see Dylan making shadow puppets with his hands.

“Pfft, amateurs.” Eddie lays down beside you while Steve plants himself next to Dylan, placing his feet up on the couch.

You guys laid like that for about an hour before your phone vibrated and Dylan was suddenly silent. He hands the phone to you and you saw Charlie’s name on the display. You head for your bedroom and close the door.

“Yes, Charlie?”

“I left a message with your lawyer. We’re going to meet again next week so I can sign the divorce papers.”

“Oh? What made you change your mind?”

“I asked Vivian to marry me.”

Your whole body froze and suddenly it felt like you couldn’t breathe. “Are…are you fucking kidding me right now? What ever happened to ‘Not signing shit until everything with Dylan is in order’?!”

“Look, I know this may come as a shock and I know you’re a little jealous—”

“You selfish asshole. This isn’t about me or you. This is about our son. This is the shit I’m talking about! You put on this act like you fucking care but if it came down between you and him, you always choose yourself!”

He hung up on you and you threw your phone angrily into the bathroom against the wall. There was nothing you could do to stop them. The tears flooded out of your eyes as you fell to your knees.

You suddenly felt strong arms wrap around you and lift you on to a lap. “It’s ok. Everything’s ok, Princess.” Eddie rocked you back and forth in his arms as he held you to him.

After a while, you wipe your cheeks and rise to your feet. “We’ll talk about it later, okay? You think you can go back out there?” You nod as he pulls you in for a quick kiss. When you both head into the living room, both Steve and Dylan are giggling as they arm wrestle on the floor.

“Little Man, you can’t beat me.” You lean over and gently poke Steve side, tickling him, giving Dylan enough time to push his arm down. “Foul! Not fair.”

Your son scrunches his little noise at him. “But for real, mom. I would have won.”

###########

That night Dylan asked if the boys could put him to bed which you were absolutely fine with. They did their normal routine of him reading to them and occasionally he would ask them questions. You leaned against the outside wall listening in on their cute banter.

“Can I ask you guys something?”

“No. We only accept questions and comments in writing after 8pm.”, Eddie chuckles as Dylan smiles. “What’s up, Kid?”

“Can you two be my daddy?”

You became more alert, debating for a moment if you should go in there and save them.

“Wow, dude. That’s a big honor. Can we ask why you would pick us?”, Steve’s voice was soft and comforting.

“You guys play with me and hang out. You don’t yell at me. You don’t make my mom cry. That’s important. I’m tired of my dad making mommy sad.”

“Same here, Bud.”, Eddie’s voice slightly cracks as he clears his throat. “I think you’d have to talk to your mom but…”

“We do care about you.” Steve helps by finishing his sentence. “We love you and your mom.” Eddie nods affirming his answer.

Dylan smiles as he pushes himself down further into his covers. “I love you guys to.”

You smile to yourself, heading back into the living room to grab Eddie’s cigarettes from his jacket and heading out to sit on the patio.

The rain had calmed down and was now falling at a soothing rhythm. You lit a cigarette as you starred out beyond the complex in front of you.

“I’m going to start charging you, ma’am.” Eddie smiles as he sits in the chair next to you, taking a cigarette out for himself. Steve followed outside behind him, taking the remaining chair. Eddie offers him a cigarette as well but he declines.

“So, what happened today?”

“Charlie proposed to Vivian.” You continue to stare straight ahead, unable to meet their eyes. Steve sighs as Eddie sarcastically laughs.

“Let me guess. Now he’s ready to sign the divorce papers.”, Steve shakes his head in disgust.

“So much for his ‘not until we get this thing with Dylan resolved’ proclamation.”, Eddie huffs as smoke leaves his lips.

Their heads turn towards you when they hear you sniffle. Steve gets up to kneel in front of you as Eddie scoots his chair closer. “Honey—”

“How do I explain that to my son? Not the part about him changing his mind on the papers but how do I tell him his father can’t make time for him but can for this bitch enough to get fucking married.”

“Well, I would probably remove the words ‘bitch’ and ‘fucking’.”

You giggle at Eddie as you run your sleeve under your eyes. “No you wouldn’t.” Steve’s hands rub your legs trying to comfort you. “I heard what Dylan asked you. I’m glad he feels that way. Even though I wish his actual father wasn’t a jackass.”

Steve rises and lifts you out of the chair, throwing you over his shoulder as he brings you back into the apartment.

“Steve!”, you laugh at him, trying to keep your voice low so you don’t wake up Dylan. Eddie smiles as he follows behind his friend through your home and into their own.

“You, baby, have had an extremely stressful fucking day and as your boyfriends it is our duty to alleviate some of that stress.” He playfully tosses you onto his bed. “And we want you to make as much noise as possible with no restrictions.”

Eddie hurls his body beside yours but Steve quickly grabs his arms and whispers something in his ear. The metalheads grin grows as he shifts closer to the bottom of the mattress by your legs while his roommate lifts you up slightly to get behind you, pulling your back to his chest as he leans against his headboard.

“Guys!” You chuckle at their earnestness as they work together to remove your clothes until your completely naked before them.

“Look, sweetheart. Steve is right. As your men this is what we have to do. We don’t make the rules.”

You suck your bottom lip through your teeth, trying to control your grin. Steve’s arms suddenly appear in front of you; one rests across your chest while the other glides between your legs. His fingers gently open your pussy lips, displaying your sex to the boy in front of you.

Eddie’s tongue runs along his lips as his eyes take you in. He hastily removes his shirt before settling himself closer to you between your legs. You whimper at the feeling of his warm breath against you.

His mouth absorbs your clit, sucking the nub between his lips as the echoes of the sound filled the room. Steve’s own mouth descended to suck and nibble on your neck causing you to reach up and run your fingers through his soft hair.

You began bucking your hips forward, desperate to reach that high. As the coil began to wind, your eyes rolled back as you felt Steve massive palm cover one of your breasts, kneading it in his hand. Your legs began to shake and Eddie’s hands flew to your thighs, holding them open as the tether broke within your belly.

You expected Eddie to stop after he helped you through your climax but he continued his assault in your cunt. He flicked his tongue quickly in and out of your entrance as Steve’s fingers reach to move circles rapidly against your swollen nub. His other hand slides up to your throat, turning your head to face him.

“Come on, honey. You and I both know Eddie could live between your legs if he could. Tasting you repeatedly as you cum. Can you cum again for him?” Steve kisses your upper lip as your mouth falls open in moan. Your hands cling to his arm as you feel your body running towards that ledge. “There you go, baby. Come on. Don’t hold back.”

His fingers on your neck gently tip your head back on to his shoulder. Your thighs try to close themselves but Eddie’s grip on them tightens as he pushes his mouth deeper into you.

“Fuuck. Oh my god.” Your body shutters against them as your second climax hits you. Neither of them lets up their relentless pace. “Please. I can’t…”

Steve teeth graze your ear lobe. “Yes, you can, Y/N. I know you can. Give us one more. Be a good girl, baby, and give us one more.”

Eddie replaces his mouth with his fingers as he pushes two of them inside of dripping entrance. He crawls up to you as Steve lifts your head to face his. Your forehead lazily connects with the boy in front of you. “One more, Princess. Cum on more time and we’ll let your pussy rest. God, you are so fucking tight right now.”

You let out an exasperated giggle when you feel the other boy’s cock twitch in his pants against you. “I think…Steve can’t wait to find out.” Eddie’s eyes flick up to Steve’s as he grins.

“Yeah, well, Stevie boy has to wait. It’s about you right now.” He thrusts his fingers into you faster as he continues to urge you to cum.

“Eddie, please. Don’t stop.” You tilt your head to kiss his lips, tasting your sweetness on his tongue.

“I may need your help, Harrington.”

Without needing more information, both of Steve’s hands grip your thighs to hold them open. Eddie’s thumb replaces the boy’s fingers on your clit as he pumps into you with purpose.

You bury your face in Steve’s neck as you shout Eddie’s name repeatedly feeling that wave crash against you as you cum. They kiss any part of your body they can reach as you slowly come down. “Please…I need…”

“No, baby you did good.” Steve scoots out from behind you as you fall back against the headboard. His hand quickly shoots out to grab your head before it makes contact with the wood. “Whoa. Careful.” He chuckles, smiling over at you as you throw a drunken grin back.

You watch them with hooded eyes as they grin at each other, removing the others clothes. Eddie climbed on Steve, leaning down to place passionate kisses on his lips. Steve’s fingers tangled in his hair as he held his mouth to his own before flipping Eddie over on to his back.

You slid your body down to press yourself against his side as his arm came around to pull your lips gently to his own. Steve’s mouth trailed down Eddie’s stomach before hovering just above the tip of his length, allowing a long line of spit to descend from his lips.

Eddie mewled into your kisses as Steve pumped his hand over his cock before taking him fully into his mouth. The boy’s lips chased yours when you moved your head to watch the display in front of you. You grinned watching Steve continue to utilize the advice you gave him before as he swirled his tongue around Eddie as his mouth moved.

“Fuuuck. He’s so fucking good at that.” Eddie panted into your shoulder as he left random kisses against your skin.

You crawl down towards Steve, delicately lifting his head to bring his lips to your own. “Can I?”

He nods, placing a soft kiss on your forehead. “If you’re ready.” He moves out of your way as you straddle Eddie, reaching your hand down to guide him into your entrance.

His face contorts in pleasure as his mouth falls open. “Fucking… damn it!”

“What?”, Steve is on his knees next to you both. You bite your bottom lip as your head leans to the side on his shoulder, your hips slowly grinding forward.

Eddie tries to look over at Steve but it’s hard for him to keep his eyes open. “We thought…she was…fuck…Jesus Harrington. We thought she was tight before?” He aggressively shakes his head as he moans.

Steve chuckles as he runs his fingers through your hair. “Do you think you can take me to?”

Eddie arches his neck to the side as he feels your pussy flutter at the other boy’s question.

He grins, kissing your lips before taking his place behind you. With his hand on your back, he gently pushes you forward. You support yourself up on your hands as you look lovingly down at the man under you. Steve’s palm remains on your lower back as he uses his other to guide himself into your ass. Your hips stop moving as Eddie takes over thrusting himself up into you.

You feel the hand on your spine slide down, coming between your legs to circle your clit and you can’t help but shout Steve’s name as his cock bottoms out inside you.

The feeling of them both inside of you was always overwhelming at first but a welcome sensation. As they both hit a steady rhythm you can feel everything wipe from your brain except for the intense pleasure of them stretching you out.

Eddie clung to your hips as he pushed into you faster until you suddenly felt him sputter beneath you and with a few more sloppy thrusts he came underneath you.

Steve laid himself flat onto your back, pushing him deeper inside of you making you whimper.

“Are you ok? It doesn’t hurt, does it?” He moved your hair to the side as he murmured into your ear.

Your forehead was leaning on Eddie’s sweaty chest as his hand reached up to pet your head. “No…it doesn’t hurt. Oh my god. Can you…?”

“Can I wait, baby?”

“Can you go harder?”

Steve’s hand wrapped around your throat, pulling you up so you were against his chest. You and Eddie groaned as his cock slid out from between your legs. Steve’s arms held you tightly as he smacked his hips against yours. His lips came down to suck on your neck as your nails dug into his arms. Your arm flew behind him and tangled in his soft hair as your body trembled against his. Steve grunted into your ear as he rode you through your high while chasing his own.

When his arms released you to hold your waist, you fell forward, collapsing on Eddie’s tummy. Steve toppled on to your back as he came inside of you. You felt his humid breath panting against your skin.

“I love you both but you’re kind of crushing me.”, Eddie whines causing Steve to chuckle as he rolls to the side. You crawled further up him, resting your head under his chin as one of your other hands found a home on the other man’s hairy chest.

“Do you want to shower real quick before we go back over to your place?”

You shake your head. “Too tired.”

The bed shifts as Steve rises to pull on some shorts and a white undershirt. You listen to him move around as he heads for the bathroom. You roll off of Eddie on to your back prepared for the routine that’s about to follow. Eddie huffs as a pile of clothes smack his face.

A small hiss leaves your mouth as Steve reaches between your legs to clean you. You laugh as fabric lands on your face and you feel the bed beside you dip as Eddie sits up to pull on his sweatpants.

You open your eyes as he tugs the shorts and shirt off your head, smiling over at him. Steve playfully rolls you around like a ragdoll, helping you get dressed.

Your smile disappeared as a thought popped into your head.

“I have an idea.”

###################

You glance through the glass partition at the boys waiting anxiously in their chairs. Steve’s eyes were darting everywhere, prepared for anything. Eddie’s legs were crossed but his foot was bouncing continuously. Their eyes met yours and you flashed them a small smile that they returned.

“Why are they here? Am I supposed to be scared or something?”, Charlie scoffed.

You pushed down the urge to respond sarcastically. After talking with your lawyer, she thought it best that she does all the talking which you were fine with.

“So, Bryan, I understand your client has decided to finalize the divorce?”

“He has.”

“Wouldn’t have anything to do with him suddenly being engaged, would it?”

“I don’t see that how that matters, Lidia.” Your lawyer responded with a sassy hm as she started pulling papers out of her briefcase.

“Well, Y/N and I are happy he’s finally changed his mind. We do however have one stipulation.”

Charlie laughed as his lawyer smiled at yours. “And that would be?”

“My client will sign the divorce papers if yours will sign the documents giving sole custody of the child to her.”

When your eyes met your exes, they were full of fury. “You bitch.” He rose to his feet and so did Eddie and Steve behind him.

His lawyer grabs his arm. “Can we have a minute, ladies? Please.”

“Take all the time you need.”

As you both walk out of the room, you hear Charlie’s heated voice. “Who the fuck does she think she is?”

“We can still fight this, Charlie. You don’t have to sign. We can keep our orig—” The doors cut them off as it closes.

“What’s happening?”, Steve’s look shifts between you and Lidia.

“Well, he took it about as good as to be expected.” Her hand rubbed your back. “You’re doing the right thing. Honestly, the fact that he didn’t completely shut down the offer outright is extremely telling.” She chuckles to herself as she glances at Eddie, dancing on the balls of his feet.

“You okay over there? You’re not on the run, are you?”

He grins in her direction. “Not a fan of this.” Eddie gestures around the building. “Reminds me of my dad.” You lean forward and wrap your arms around him.

“You don’t have to keep coming with me, you know?”, your voice is muffled in his chest.

“I know I don’t have to. I want to. Whatever keeps you and Kid safe and comfortable.”

Steve patted his back as Lidia exhaled a happy sigh. “Aw I love these guys. Edward are you single?”

“Ah, no ma’am but if I ever am…”, Eddie smiles playfully.

She raises her eyebrows coyly at Steve.

“Sorry, Lidia. I’m taken to.”

She jokingly snaps her fingers. “Oh, oh! Ok, here we go. Put your game face on.” Lidia pushes your back towards the door as you both come back in and take a seat.

Charlie’s lawyer looks completely worn out. “We…Charlie has decided to accept the offer.”

Neither of you can look at each other as you start signing papers. You watch his hands sign line after line numbly.

“Good. Um, Lidia, I will call you and we can discuss meetings for the new schedule as well as get a set time to reconvene about the visitation further down the line.”

Lidia nods as she starts gathering the paperwork in front of her.

“Not like she cares.”, Charlie snaps in your direction.

“I do care. I don’t want this to be permanent.” He scoffs as he starts to get up from his chair. “I really don’t! Everything I’m doing here is for our son.”

“Yeah, sure.” Charlie stomps out of the room and to your lawyers dismay you follow after him. Steve tries to grab your arm but you pull it away.

“Fight me then! Take me to court and fight for him.” You run in front of him, blocking him with your body. “Fight for him. Fight to keep the joint custody. Think about it. If you won, he could go to your wedding. He could be there for the holidays. Dylan has a talent show next month that you could come see. All you would have to do is be there.” Charlie’s eyes scanned yours as you spoke.

There was a split second where you thought for a moment you had gotten through to him. He side steps around you and out the front door. Bryan follows him, stopping to give you a sullen look.

“Are you ok, honey?” Lidia comes up to your side and grabs your hand.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine. We got what we wanted, right?” You don’t wait for answer as you walk out the door and head for Steve’s car.

You hear shoes crunching quickly against the gravel behind you as a strong hand reaches for your arm. Steve pulls you to him, holding your head to his chest. You try and push him away, hitting your small hands against him but it doesn’t work. His cheek rests in your hair as your arms loop around him, clinging to him. Suddenly, you feel another set of arms wrap around your waist as Eddie leans against your back. They hold you to them as the tears begin to flow.

###############

@adequate-superstar @strangerthings1983fan

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##############

I tried to grab all the tags. If I missed you guys please let me know!

#steddie x reader #steddie fluff #steddie smut #steddie fanfiction #steddie #eddie munson #steve harrington #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson smut #eddie fanfic #eddie stranger things #steve fanfic #steve smut #steve stranger things #joe keery #joseph quinn #stranger things #fan fiction

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lover-of-mine · 6 months

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https://www.tumblr.com/lover-of-mine/745334896398073856/i-know-i-completely-changed-my-original-spec-on-s7 please I want to hear this! I love hearing your metas and spec lol

Alexa, darling, I love that the original spec was also written on an ask from you, thank you for always supporting my ramblings 💜💜💜💜also @steadfastsaturnsrings, Saturn, darling, I do have more thoughts lol

Okay first, this one needs context, so other metas/speculations whose elements got me to think this one makes sense, I don't think you need to read them for this to make sense, but just in case you want to read something more in-depth about it, I do strongly recommend you read them thought, I think it makes this one more impactful: link to the original spec where all I had to go on was the voices in my head, like legit, we didn't even have a date for season 7 yet, this one is just in case you wanna see the original version of this, buddie is mirroring the couples in Buck, actually and the only situation they are missing is the couple that crashed into the tree aka both of them in danger/hurt at the same time, Buck needs to deal with death/figure out how to live as someone who wants to live, buddie is tied by death.

Okay, so, when I first started thinking about this I was mostly thinking about Buck's relationship with water/breathing and that leading to a breakdown or leading to buddie. Because Buck drowning could trigger him enough for him to have a full-blown breakdown, but a Buck who's already been through the process of realizing he wants to be alive almost dying again might give him an oh moment that would lead him to act on his feelings for Eddie. My hope was also for that to mirror elements of the shooting since I am a firm believer that the shooting was Eddie's oh moment. But I was writing that with no clue about what they would do with the season, so now that we have more information, I need to tweak things a bit.

Buck has a very intricate relationship with breathing which also gives him an intricate relationship with water. The first call we see on the pilot is the 118 responding to a kid who drowned, who Buck is doing cpr on, then we have the baby on the wall who's also not breathing, we have the girl getting strangled by her snake, and we have him saving Athena with water. On a less this is probably just a coincidence note, Buck's first real brush with death is on the date with Abby, where he chokes and Abby needs to perform an emergency tracheotomy on him, the surgery on his leg leads to blood clots in his lung, he gets caught on a tsunami, during the warehouse fire in Buck Begins he gives his mask to the victim and openly states he will hold his breath and the sprinklers also give it the water elements, and after the lightning, the thing that stops working is his lungs. This all led me to the belief that they will drown Buck at some point. Mostly because I wanted to mirror elements of the shooting and one of the elements of the shooting is that it brings up a previous trauma for Eddie. The easiest way to bring up previous trauma for Buck is to drown him, you hit breathing and water elements. Having him crash his car, be driven off the road, drive off a bridge, or something like that, into water is a situation that would be urgent enough that he can't wait for help. At first, I just put Eddie in the car because I wanted Eddie to be forced to save Buck, but now I have a reasoning for Eddie to be in the car.

Let me back up and explain how getting there makes sense though. The promotion of the season has had a lot of talk about vulnerability, and Buck and Eddie leaning on each other, and they need to deal with death as a concept. Eddie needs to stop chasing Shannon, along with dealing with the grief over having to save Buck and Buck needs to deal with his passively suicidal behavior and with the way that following the coma dream, Buck actually does care if he dies, so he needs to get to a point where he acts as someone who wants to be alive and asks for the things he wants. Personally, I think the only way buddie will truly work as a couple is if they get to that point, because a Buck who asks for what he wants is not a Buck who will let Eddie get away with thinking he's always right, and Eddie needs to stop trying to fix what went wrong with Shannon and just do what he actually means.

Eddie welcoming Buck to the world of the living in the locker room gave me hope on that front because Buck finding out he wants to be alive and also calling Eddie on his bullshit while they navigate a place where Buck can face death as something not scary can be good for both of them, especially with the way they keep talking about both Buck and Eddie just “wanting to be happy” because they could walk through the trauma, and Buck talking about death as boring and the focus the show put on Shannon on the past few episodes, showing Eddie and Chris visiting her grave, more detail on hers and Eddie's relationship, Chris’ conflict with her memory, you can have them learning the move forward together. Oliver also saying there will be a chance of things coming up in a not so great light but the friendship persevering can also mean that they will deal with other aspects of their relationship that could create problems in their relationship, like the way they assume they understand each other so they won't actually talk about things that matter and just assume the other will understand what they mean since they are very much in sync a lot of the time, like for instance the way Buck definitely misunderstood what Eddie actually meant with his will or the way Eddie reacted to Natalia and the whole I feel like she sees me. They also need to deal with the way they don't talk to each other about big changes in their lives, Eddie didn't talk to Buck about changing his will or leaving the 118, Buck didn't talk to Eddie about the sperm donation, and they need to.

So let's say season 7 is the buddie utopia of my dreams where they address these base issues, something they need to talk about is how it felt to save each other's lives. But they haven't talked about it yet, and it's been long enough they would need another trigger. But this conversation is the conversation you pretty much can't write without ending it with a love confession of some form, but I'll come back to this.

We need a trigger. I said up there about how they are mirroring the calls in Buck, Actually. There we have a crush injury involving a vehicle with Thomas and Mitchell, we have someone injured more worried about the other's safety who got injured by someone while at work with Ruth and Earl, we have Lola and See Me Norman talking her out of the ledge. Crush injury and focus with hand holding happens both ways, with the truck bombing and the bridge, one of the injured by more worried about the other we also have both ways, granted one is a lot more intense than the other, but during the shooting Eddie asks if Buck is hurt and when they get kidnapped, Buck gets pistol whipped but he spends the whole time more worried about Eddie than himself. And we watched Buck talk Eddie off a metaphorical ledge in dumb luck, if we're lucky, we can get a mirror of that going the other way this season.

Most of my hopes of this particular thing come with the way Buck and Eddie's individual storylines are parallel but slightly misaligned, you have the first love who left and came back without giving them real closure, you have Eddie having too much responsibility being put on him by his parents when Buck is invisible over the fact that he “failed” on the thing his parents' wanted from him, the lightning mirrors the well quite literally, they are in opposite sides of the frame, Buck is in the sky, Eddie is underground, Buck is the middle of a street, Eddie is the middle of nowhere, (here’s a set if you need help visualizing that), among other smaller things, like the way Buck’s first death on the job was someone falling to their death and for Eddie too.

That leaves us with the newlyweds who crashed on their way back from the wedding, aka a situation where both of them get hurt, but one of them gets pinned, one of them gets the worst of it.

So car crash.

I go back and forth as to why they are in the car. I played with the idea of Taylor activating her emergency beacon and them actually going into that situation willingly, but considering everything about the show, you can do pretty much anything, they could witness a crash and then things go to hell, they could be driven off the road, they could fight in the car and lose control, I don't know, but the thing is, utopia buddie who are in a spot where the change from friends to more could work, maybe toeing the line more heavily (I mean, we are mirroring newlyweds lol), getting into a crash while off duty. It's very important that they are off duty because now we're mirroring elements of the shooting.

Why we mirroring the shooting? Well, because the shooting is a banger. I'm kidding lol. There's something inherently romantic about the shooting, Buck wearing Eddie’s blood, the shared looks across the pavement, the focus on hands, Eddie literally bleeding out and asking if Buck’s hurt, Buck escalating from we got you to I got you, from just hang on to I need you to hang on. And there’s also my personal belief that Eddie is aware of his feelings and realized what they meant during the shooting, so I want to put Buck in a situation where he can’t escape what his feelings about Eddie mean, because I think Buck never stopped to truly look at what Eddie is to him. And with where they are, to be put in a situation like that would force them both to confront these feelings, even if they don't feel like saying Eddie has been pining since season 4.

The shooting has quite a few elements that make it as intense as it is: they are not supposed to be there, it’s not their call and the 136 is the house responsible, it brings up a previous trauma for both of them, Eddie gets shot, bringing up things from his days in the army and Buck is forced to roll under the truck after being crushed by one, Buck does the saving alone because there’s no one else they trust around, it happens by chance because Eddie gets targeted just because, they are also done with what they went to do by the time Eddie gets shot. All of these can be achieved in many ways, the only thing I’m sure of is that they need to be in the car together and they need to be off-duty because if they are not off-duty you take away from the urgency of the situation, having tools and immediate rescue available waters the situation down. I don’t know why but I keep going back to them driving off a cliff into water, sometimes I shift to a bridge, but they used that with Judd and Grace in Lone Star so I don’t know if we would get a repeat, but basically I see them stopping to help someone, getting back to the car, and maybe the side of the road gives under them, or there’s another crash, that now is into them throwing them over, or they get driven off the road. There’s also the chance of them just losing control of car, a tire pops, it's raining, something runs across the road, and they get underwater.

Why is them being underwater important? If they are just hanging on the side of the cliff, they can wait for help. Also, we are bringing up past trauma for both of them, if you put them in a car filling with water, you hit the water/breathing elements for Buck, but you also hit well elements for Eddie, and Shannon was also hit by a car. So their car gets thrown into water, going back to the Buck, Actually comparison, the crash, one of them gets pinned. The one who’s pinned needs to be Buck. Why? Eddie is the widower, Buck is the savior. Eddie has to live with the fact that he didn’t actually save the people he thought he did, and he has to live with the fact he was helpless watching Shannon die, and Buck exists to do the saving. So we are letting Buck be saved and Eddie know he actually did save him. It could be cathartic for both of them.

And I want Eddie performing desperate CPR. Sue me. Can you imagine everything Ryan can give us there? Mouth to mouth, “you’re not doing this to me again”, being all wet and you can’t tell if the water on his face is from the water or his tears, begging Buck to wake up, Buck finally coughing wake and dropping back against Eddie, Eddie breathing as heavily as Buck as he hubs his back and encourages him to breathe while refusing to let go of him. If we’re lucky Eddie hiding his face in Buck’s hair or something like that. It could be so good. Because you can also have Buck looking at Eddie like he’s seeing him for the first time in a very clear revelation moment. You can have them looking at each other in a clear revelation moment. It could be THE oh moment.

And then they can talk. I said I would come back to this. Them having a conversation about saving each other, forces them to talk about what they mean to each other. You literally can’t have them talk about what it was like to save the other without forcing them to talk about how they love each other, and if they do the groundwork I mentioned, they can have one HELL of a getting-together scene. Imagine one them yelling “because I don’t want to live without you!” and the way it would be literally I don’t wanna be alive without you and I don’t want to continue living my life without you. And like, having Buck say something like this with the way he reacted to Thomas and Mitchell dying together and how he focused on them dying together, not the life they had, and the way Buck interpreted Eddie’s will as Eddie asking him to be okay with Eddie dying, Eddie asking him to outlive him, and have him look Eddie in the eye “I don’t ever want to do this without you” come oooooooooon, it would be such a beautiful conclusion to the buildup we have right now.

But yeah, this is the madness. The ultimate wishful thinking. I could be so good.

Anyway, if you read this I love you 💜

#this is long lol #imagine not being delusional #couldn't be me lol #911 #911 meta #911 spoilers #911 speculation #buddie thoughts #buddie #i really need a tag for asks #alexa 💜#🪐#drown Buck 2024

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juno-box · 11 months

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If you could pick ONE person to make it to the Final Season with Clem, outside of the obvious choices (Lee, Kenny, Luke, etc.) who would it be?

Optional: How do you think they'd affect the course of season 4?

If I could pick one person? Duck. Surviving with Clem from S1 to the finish line, I feel like there's some things he can change.

If he woke up in the room with Clem, he'd could probably be a bit of a mediator between the two, he'd probably take charge a bit and not let her size Tenn up.

In terms of people he'd get along with, Willy, Brody and Mitch come to mind. Once that slightly laid back personality starts coming out, I feel like Aasim would try to lump him in Louis. Duck would probably respect a lot of Louis' outlooks on post-apocalypse life.

During the card game at dinner, I bet answering questions would be hilarious.

C: "What's the grossest thing you've ever eaten?" V: "Oh that's easy, uh, horse eyeballs." M: "Slugs." L: "Cantaloupe." C: "I ate a guy's leg once?" D: "No you didn't!" C: "Oh, right, that's was you." D: "Y-... Hey!" V: "..." M: "..." L: "..." D&C: "We're kidding!" L: "... Are you?"

I imagine, the night they find out Marlon & Brody's secret, I feel like he would either go with Clem or she'd ask him to stay with AJ.

If Duck was there, would he see AJ and stop him? More than likely not on time, the moment he saw him (because literally nobody saw him, but Duck has good hearing and a good eye as we see in S1). Duck would see AJ the second he's about to pull the trigger and it's too late.

It's morning, AJ asks if he's a murderer. Duck would instantly tell him no, but try to explain what he did was considered murder. Naturally, confusing AJ. So Clem would take over.

Tenn comes and gets them for funeral, they come back and wait for the vote. They have to leave.

I feel like on the walk, Duck would quietly ask Clem if it's possible they can try Richmond, but Clem would say it's still too risky.

I mean just imagining Duck running into Lilly again and all I can hear is:

"Kenny's kid...?" "Lilly...?" "Great. I don't suppose your dad's around here, is he?" "Lucky for you, he's not." "Hmph. So he's dead then." "Well, duh...?" "???"

I think he'd be a sharpshooter from the windows. So when Lilly grabs Tenn, he'd shoot her in the arm. I think Tenn would get him to move, and I don't think Mitch would charge then. So... Mitch spared?!

Would he be captured? Yeah, I think so. I think he'd sacrifice himself for either Vi or Lou.

Would Duck be maimed on the boat? Oooh, I dunno. I think since he's more survival toughened, he wouldn't talk more than the Delta found permissible unlike Louis, even though Louis was trying to help Aasim and Omar.

But, when the bomb goes off, hearing in one of his ears is damaged. It's a bit more muffled.

He'd probably be strong enough to fricking yeet Tennessee on the other side of the bridge the minute he pulls that stunt with Minerva.

Which may or may not lead to him being bit. He doesn't get devoured, but Tenn does get him bit. Which pisses AJ off. So Duck missing one of his arms? Ye?

I think he'd get Clem up before she's bit herself, but that doesn't mean we might not have to ditch her leg because of what Minnie did to it on the bridge.

Sorry, it's all over the place but these just came to mind as I was typing, lol!

#ask #twdg #twdg clementine #twdg duck #the walking dead game #the walking dead telltale #telltale the walking dead #twdg s4 #twdg season 4

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hyah-lian · 11 months

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Sorta stimmy links stuff, and also v inspired by @triforce-of-mischief and her fic series Overcome (about trypanophobic Lege) hoping that they like this fic and find comfort in it bc it sounds like it's been a rough few days.

⚠️Trigger warnings for mention of the cause of trypanophobia/brief discussion of it. Also some descriptions ppl may find claustrophobic bc I have headcanons of Hyrule liking very tight spaces. BUT this is primarily supposed to be fluffy and comfort-y

It got a lot longer than I thought lol

---------

"I feel like a blanket would be more appropriate, 'Rule," Legend deadpanned.

He stared as the other hero wiggled into the small triangular gap he made between travel-packs.

"Nope," Hyrule popped the 'p', "this is better."

Legend shrugged and reclined to support his weight on his hands behind him while Hyrule fidgeted into the small trap he made for himself.

Then he wheezed out what felt like all the air in his lungs as Hyrule's head smacked into his stomach unexpectedly.

"Oh. I thought you were still behind me, behind me."

Legend couldn't even be mad with Hyrule's big eyes and smile staring up at him. He wheeled again, still catching his breath, before motioning for the other Link to sit up again. Legend scooted himself forward in the same reclined position until his shoulder was roughly lined up with Hyrule's back.

"There," he bumped an elbow into 'Rules back, "you can lay back now."

Hyrule did so with a happy little hum, pulling the two bags around his elbows in tighter before relaxing back fully. He squirmed for a second, pulling out scraps of fabric left over from ruined clothes and began twisting and braiding them into a rope.

"Comfy?" Legend snorted a laugh through his nose.

"Yep!" Hyrule popped the 'p' once more with a huge grin.

--------

Legend had been on edge all day after yesterday's fight.

More like yesterday's after-fight.

Hyrule couldn't count the number of times Legend's hands went to pick at and worry the edge of the bandage around his bicep. How many times he took a wide berth around Warriors and Time. How quiet he had been all day. The quiver and bitter-sour blackberry taste of fear weaved into Legend's essence.

They stopped for camp a bit earlier than usual, only because the path ended up shorter than anticipated and they found the spot Four said he needed to visit quickly.

The minish woods were sweetened with magic like candied grapes that had Hyrule feeling giddy and recharged.

The clearing they were in was near what looked like a miniature temple with a vast flat of lush green grass on top that sung of little motes of magic. It gave Hyrule an idea and he sprinted off to jump the small gap and little trickling stream of water in front of it.

Twilight shouted out in surprise and reached for 'Rulie as he ran off, but Four stopped him.

Four smiled after Hyrule, taking a moment to... listen? to something before turning over his shoulder to shout.

"LEGE! Hyrule's gone off the path again."

Legend turned and glared at Four for a moment before taking a deep breath and shouldering both his and Hyrule's packs over his good arm.

Hyrule grinned as he bounced on the balls of his feet, hair whooshing with the motion before continuing to carefully run his way up to the raised area. Something about it spoke of warmth to him, and like everywhere else in this forest, he kept the feeling that light and careful steps were a must.

When Legend bridged the gap between them, Hyrule took the bags with exaggerated care. He avoided touching Legend's good or bad arm and instead of grabbing the other's hand like he wanted to, he held his own out in offering.

Legend hesitated. Hyrule smiled and turned to keep walking with his hand still an open palmed invitation.

He felt Legend grab the tips of his fingers after a moment. If that was all he could tolerate, Hyrule was proud he made that step.

Legend followed, cautious and confused at Hyrule's winding path. The slowed pace, though, he was grateful for. Ever since patch-up last night he felt cotton-headed and on edge.

Wars has needed Time to hold-

Legend shook his head violently, shaking the world onto a new axis. He felt his breath hitch and drew back his hand like the touch burned.

"There is a step up in front of you, Lege."

Hyrule's words regrounded him briefly. He took a shaky breath in and nodded. He climbed up the small slope to stand atop the flat of emerald grass.

Hyrule tossed down his bag and gently placed Legend's and fiddled with them to make a short a-frame gap.

"Sit?"

<I'm fine.> Legend signed. He hadn't felt like talking all day. Not even sure if he could had he wanted to.

"Please? Try. It is like a hug but nobody is really touching you."

Legend felt a stab of panic again, thinking back to his wounds getting tended.

"You can push them off or make it as small as you want. A safe hide. Just here, your stuff, and the grass and sun."

Hyrule was leaning back and lazily running his hands through the warm blades of grass as if that was the only thing to want in the world.

Of course it could be his world is near-dead.

Legend quashed the negative thoughts as they tried to bubble up.

<Okay. I'll try.>

Even with Hyrule facing away, Legend knew he saw.

He sat next to the carefully positioned packs and tried to scoot his way under the way Hyrule would. Elbows and knees protesting, but even with that and the sour mood he had been stuck in it felt silly and he couldn't help the faint flutter of a laugh stir in his chest.

<Nobody will believe you got me to wiggle into a bag-tent like an inchworm,> he joked.

Hyrule just smiled, and for a second Legend wasn't sure if the traveler had seen him signing. But Hyrule stood and held the packs apart just enough for Legend to wiggle between them much more comfortably.

Hyrule sat behind Legend. Close but not touching. The bags dropped to lean against each other again, pressing the faintest pressure onto his chest and arms. None of the fear of restraint or hands on his skin stirred. Deeper breaths settled behind his ribs, and Legend felt some of his tense discomfort ease away.

"You can lean on me, if you want. Take a load off and breathe. It is safe here. You are safe here."

Legend wanted to, badly, but his chest tightened again. A split second of emotion jolting forward to choke him again. His eyes stung.

He dipped his head back cautiously and found Hyrule's shoulder solidly in place. He took a shaky breath, and another. The sun was warm, it was quiet and smelled like sweet lemon grass and pine. His breath hitched again on a sob, loose items in their bags jingling with the movement.

"It's okay," Hyrule said, swaying slightly but still a solid presence behind Legend. "I've got you when you're ready."

Legend broke.

After some time spent in an exhausted haze, Legend realized he had fallen asleep and was now waking up. He was half buried under rucksacks with his head on Hyrule's lap, warm orange afternoon sun heating him, and a steady weight pressed to his shoulder.

He took an unhindered breath in, heaving a huge sigh-turned-yawn. The scrap-rope Hyrule was working on swayed in front of his eyes. The boy was still gently swaying and humming, short snippets on repeat.

"Thanks..." his voice cracked with the word after going all day without using it.

"Any time."

----

It had been a good few hours since Legend and Hyrule had taken off. Four had separated himself after a lot of easing fears to go see the Minish.

They had spent those hours catching up with the small folk, and doing a few dispatches of pesky spiders or other favors.

After finishing those tasks, Four met with the Minish Elder in this village and they walked through the halls of one of the buildings Four liberated years back. They exited the doors into the warm orange glow of late afternoon to stand at the river's edge to finish talking.

Giggling and excited chatter tumbled down the slope of the building's walls, and Four climbed up to peek over the ledge.

Hyrule and Legend were leaning together, fast asleep, and a dozen or so minish were cuddled up to, or climbing on the two of them. Excited chatter about them smelling the same as Four and having the same soft aura to them filtered over.

Four scrambled back down and relayed the sight to the Elder before promising to come back again in the morning.

#stimmy links #hyah-txt #linked universe #linked universe fic #needle phobic legend #i dont know the fancy word for it rn #downfall duo bein bros and taking care of eachother #sometimes u need to get away from people but also have people. or have a hug but no touchy #sometimes u need a good cry #hugs legend #i edited it to add a part at the end thay got cut off

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tarisilmarwen · 1 year

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Rebels Rewatch: “The Lost Commanders”

After the harrowing peril of the premiere we settle in for a more laid-back and chill adventure with some old familiar faces.

We open with the Rebels discussing what to do next, after the shankening that Vader handed them last episode.

(And let’s appreciate for a moment how, if not for becoming distracted by Ahsoka, Vader would have completely decimated Phoenix Cell in its entirety by himself.)

Ezra blurts out his ideas before remembering that he needs to have a modicum of proper decorum. (I love his awkward little salute and Sabine shaking her head all cutely long-suffering.) Clearly he feels comfortable enough to be himself in this formal, militarized environment.

“You are never shy with your opinions, Ezra Bridger,” has all the hidden consternated tones of, “Why did we let this feral gremlin child into the Rebelllion.” lol, Sato is just so confounded that this is his life now, he’s the commander of ragtag teams with literal fifteen year olds.

This episode is the first of what I’m going to affectionately call the “Friendship Fetch Quests”, in which we go have mildly interesting adventures and do something seemingly innocuous that gains us an ally that will wind up being important later. Season Two is mostly this, if we’re honest. We go to this location, we do this character’s Loyalty Mission, we gain them as an asset to call upon later. It fits very well with the overall theme of connection and family, of making friendships and bridges that benefit the cause. Ezra’s unique Force ability is literally the power to connect, so it makes perfect thematic sense that the show emphasizes the connections made to bring so many disparate people together and unite them in the fight against the Empire.

Anyway, Ahsoka decides to aim the Ghost crew at Rex, not telling Kanan beforehand that she’s sending him to meet some clones which is... a bit of a questionable decision.

“There are questions... questions that need answering.” Aaaaaand take a shot every time there’s a Lord of the Rings shoutout in this show, we’re gonna be seeing a lot of them.

The fanfare is slightly altered this episode, vaguely TCW-sounding?

The Ghost suffers a Plot Contrivance so that Hera and Chopper can stay in orbit while the rest go down to the planet. And MY GOSH this is pretty.

I know I keep harping on the soft, watercolor-like quality of the textures but seriously, the Ralph McQuarrie style is all over these backgrounds.

Ralph McQuarrie being one of the original concept artists for the OT; his designs and art style were largely recycled, reused, and repurposed for Rebels.

You can already tell Kanan is suspecting what they’re about to encounter.

Multiple other people have already pointed out that the AT-TE has a lot of Studio Ghilbi Howl’s Moving Castle vibes. I’m just gonna reiterate them.

I love this moment right here with no music or dialogue, just the soft sound of the wind chimes. Very zen. Very lovely atmosphere.

I still haven’t actually seen TCW in its entirety, full disclosure, so I was not nearly as excited about this reveal as the Tari Husband was.

(He was sooo excited, lemme tell ya.)

HGKAJHSFKAHSFSA KANAN BEING CONFRONTED WITH A WALKING PTSD TRIGGER FROM HIS PAST AND HIS IMMEDIATE FIRST THOUGHT IS TO STEP IN FRONT OF HIS PADAWAN.

A couple people have pointed it out but Kanan’s posture here is mirrored to Depa’s in the Kanan: The Last Padwan comics. (AKA the superior tragic Kanan backstory *glares at The Bad Batch*) One hand forward, one hand with lightsaber back, shielding the padawan.

Love that.

Lol awww, Ezra being excited about the Gen 1 Clone Trooper helmet and then disappointed when Rex tells him not to touch it.

Kinda dig that Ezra’s the one doing the talking. Kanan has obvious issues with clones but Ezra doesn’t have that bias, and he’s naturally likable, so it’s easy for Rex to give in to him, at least somewhat.

*continues to grumble about The Bad Batch retconning Rex’s characterization here*

No, listen, this is why new writers need to be given refresher courses on the characters before they come on board and shows with interconnected continuities need to have detailed arc and plot maps to follow, sure we can infer and theorize that something or other sapped Rex of his motivation and drive to fight but then that’s fandom carrying the water and doing the work for the writers and I hate that, don’t do the writers’ work for them we deserve better than that!

*ahem*

But I’ll refrain from going into that rant.

Kanan’s expression. :( He hates every minute of this.

This is a nice dolly shot around here.

THIS WHOLE CONVERSATION. :(

Ezra the empath, trying to understand why his master is so agitated. How he shrinks slightly when Kanan yells. How Kanan says he doesn’t want to discuss it but does so anyway because Ezra just has that effect on people?

THE ABSOLUTE PAIN AND RAW EMOTION IN KANAN’S VOICE AS HE TALKS ABOUT ORDER 66 AND WATCHING HIS MASTER DIE.

*grumbles a little bit about TCW Season Seven making this line of Rex’s into more of a self-cope than the honest truth*

This whole sequence with the Joopa hunt is technically completely superfluous but it’s soooooo much fun. :D

The camerawork, the dialogue, the animation, the sound design and music, the Old West adventure-feel of it, the badass little moments and characterization bits for Sabine and Zeb and Kanan and Ezra...

It just makes me smile.

Speaking of the music though, this has such a classic Hollywood sound. Bombastic strings and brass, soaring into high notes and dancing.

(Favorite bit of this sequence is Kanan kick-jumping his rod into Ezra’s hands and Ezra immediately turning around and jamming them both into the line.)

Sweet.

This shot. <333

Zeb deciding to roll with Gregor’s compliment. <333

A brief snippet of Ezra’s theme here, when Kanan calls Hera. I’m actually not going to grumble about Hera’s backstory later being filled in a little, that was undefined enough that the fleshing out didn’t change anything vital.

Instead I’m going to note this very pretty flute line here.

Rex and Ezra’s friendship is criminally underrated. I bet Rex sees shades of a younger Ahsoka in him and Ezra just sees a cool old guy with great stories, another strong male influence for a teenage boy who needs them.

Ezra still can’t help talking Kanan up though.

<3333

Ezra playing peacekeeper. (Not for the last time.)

As I said, still haven’t fully watched TCW but I do appreciate that Wolffe and Gregor are both obviously damaged by their wartime experiences, Gregor by going just slightly batty, Wolffe by being a paraonoid anxiety wreck, white bites the Rebels when he calls the Empire. Rex having to remind him, “[The Jedi] weren’t the ones that betrayed us.” and “The war is over.” are like so many self-regulating mantras he must have practiced, to remind both him and the others of the truth. The chip’s influence lingers, even though they’ve all had it removed.

Ezra looking between Rex and Kanan like an anxious child in the middle of a custody battle lol.

This sequence is loose with the animation, bouncy like the first season, but the quick movements and shot choices emphasize the frantic nature of them needing to shoot the probe.

A veeery small excerpt of the Imperial March here as we close out.

This episode (and it’s following companion) is soooo rewatchable. It has the fun chill vibe of the first season with an emphasis on heavier character development and background stakes. The clones are well-integrated into the plot, used mostly to trigger and discuss Kanan’s personal traumas, while also hinting at the crap the clones have gone through themselves. There’s an almost self-defensive anger in Rex’s voice when he insists, “I didn’t betray my Jedi. [...] We all have a choice.” because for the clones... they didn’t.

I’m one of the people who likes the chips, who likes it being literally mind control rather than just genetic conditioning that turned the clones on the Jedi, like in Legends. The way I tend to sum it up is thus:

With Order 66 being just one order in many that the clones followed unquestioningly because they’re just that loyal and obedient, it makes the clones seems more monstrous. With it being a literal brainwashing device overriding their free will, it makes Palpatine more monstrous.

That he would choose clones instead of droids, because the Jedi would see the clones as human, as friends, as worthy of protecting and fighting alongside, and thus would be more blindsided, and the clones would be loyal and dependable friends right up until the chip kicked in and blanked them out, giving no warning, snaring the Jedi into the perfect deathtrap...

Hgnnnh the feels.

Ezra-as-everyone’s-therapist would continue through the season but for now let me just appreciate that Kanan’s issues are so deeply rooted it takes a few episodes to solve, lol.

Anyway, this episode is great.

#star wars #star wars rebels #rebels rewatch #liveblog #space dad and his precious pumpkin child #tbb critical

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gothcsz · 5 months

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𝑻𝒉𝒐𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉𝒇𝒂𝒓𝒆 / Chapter IV.

PAIRING: Javier Peña x Original Female Character

SUMMARY: The beginning of the end...

WORD COUNT: ~7.5k

RATING: 18+ Mature topics such as sex, drugs, murder, the occult, religion, cannibalism and other triggering matters will be explored in this body of work. Minors DNI.

CHAPTER SPECIFIC TAGS: The start of a very wicked love triangle, slowburn slowburn slowburnnnn, mentions of religion (Catholicism), porn WITH plot !!!, some characterization, other things that I'm probably forgetting.

DISCLAIMER/WARNINGS: The Javier Peña referenced in this body of work is solely based off of the character that appears in Netflix’s Narcos and not the actual person. Very canon divergent and I will tweak things as I see fit to compliment the narrative of this story. While efforts have been made to be accurate in terms of canon timeline, a lot of details will be fictionalized.

A/N: this took me longer than i anticipated solely bc i hate rereading my writing lol i'm tryin suuuuper hard to get javi's characterization down so i hope i'm doing him justice fr 🙏🏽 the plot is slowly getting started and i'm just rly hype for it bc i love the whole southern gothic vibe like it EATS!!! anyways feel free to drop any type of feedback/support on this blog or ao3. i'd really appreciate it <3

♰ read on ao3. ♰

♰ playlist | pinterest | series masterlist ♰

“You know, most guys woulda thrown in the towel by now.” Paloma tells him, legs steadily peddling her bicycle as Javier drives in his cruiser alongside her.

“Most guys are idiots, querida.” He replies cooly, one arm dangling lazily out of the driver’s side window and his aviators sitting pretty on the bridge of his nose.

Paloma’s laugh rings out beautifully and he can’t keep himself from smiling. “S’no wonder they quit on you. You’re stubborn as hell.” He grumbles, thinking of the various times that she’s rejected his offer to drive her wherever she needed.

Initially, Javier’s behavior bordered on being a downright nuisance, deliberately encroaching on her personal space with excessive proximity. It wasn’t entirely due to his duties; rather, he found amusement in witnessing her irritation. The combination of her sharp retorts and accompanying eye rolls became an addictive response he couldn’t resist provoking.

It was entertaining, to say the least.

Amidst his constant patrolling, Javier got to learn more about her little by little. Details like what her routine consists of and how she interacts with others.

It’s abundantly evident that Paloma is adored by nearly everyone she encounters. Her kindness, wit, talent… beauty. It’s thoughts like these that had him second guessing how he was approaching the sheriff’s orders.

It was making him feel like a stalker, honestly, so he decided to pull back a bit. She is grown, after all, and she’s reminded him of that fact almost daily.

So, Javier gave her the space they both need. Not following her around everywhere or posting up outside her job. During his downtime, he is able to put more analytical attention on the current homicide case. Starting with the guy that had lingered at Nina’s funeral.

He asked around, trying to get any information about a potential boyfriend or anything of that nature but came up empty handed.

Paloma grins proudly at his words. “You say stubborn I say strong-willed. I do appreciate you easing off, though.” She looks over at him and he admires how pretty she looks beneath the sunlight.

Brown hair clipped up into a messy updo and a soft, yellow sundress adorning her body. A hidden gem in this vast and obscure town.

“‘Least I could do. Helps me think, too, drivin’ around.” Javier keeps himself from reminiscing on his days in Colombia and the endless amount of stakeouts he’d been apart of. Sure, his ass would get numb and most of the time they acquired nothing but it helped him analyze any and every detail he could examine; often the copious amount of time he spent trying to piece everything together lead to a bigger break in the investigation.

He’s just applying the same technique here. Unfortunately, he hasn’t been able to make anything out of it all.

“Ah, so the car is your go to spot? Mine is the abandoned tracks over by Montrose. For some reason, I think better there… if that makes any sense.” The conversation continues easily and naturally. That is another thing he’s come to learn about her, Paloma is very amiable.

“It makes sense, muñeca. You shouldn’t go by yourself, though. Don’t know who could be followin’ you all the way out there…”

“I think it’s an officer that goes by Peña and I’m pretty sure he’s stalking me.” She teases him and he rolls his eyes, letting out a dry chuckle.

Javier really wants to urge her to let him take her to work but he knows she’ll challenge him.

Thinner strands of her hair stick to her neck and other damp areas of her face; the sweat on her thighs which he can see gleam beneath the hot sun each time she pedals. That leather seat she’s sitting on must be uncomfortable.

“I’m sure he’s just trying to make sure that you don’t run into any trouble. Which is why I think you should let me give you a ride to the library before you pass out and die of heat exhaustion tryin’ to bike there.” Javier tilts his head to the side to look at her and she stays quiet, thinking over his words before letting out a defeated sigh.

“Fine, but only because it’s hot as shit and I may or may not be jealous of the A/C in your cruiser.” He can’t help the smirk that tugs at his lips as she caves in, rolling the vehicle to a smooth stop and putting it into park so that he could mount her bicycle to the back of it.

Javier’s eyes trail over her form as her back is turned to him, grabbing her things out of the small basket. If her father knew the scandalous thoughts he had about her— he’d have him quartered and drawn. That does have a wave of guiltiness wash over him since the man is trusting him fully to look out for her and her wellbeing.

Which he is, in that regard Romeo has nothing to worry over, it’s Javier’s attraction to her that’s messing with his conscience.

It doesn’t help that Paloma plays into it, feigning innocence when she gets a reaction out of him. Maybe he shouldn’t be so reactive.

“I got it.” Javier insists, taking ahold of the metal handle and brushing up against her as he does so. He feels her body stiffen at the sudden touch yet he keeps a satisfied simper at bay.

“Thank you, officer.” She recovers smoothly with that intriguing timbre she uses when they banter flirtatiously.

It is so wrong yet so right of them to continue whatever this is. Seeing just how far they can take it before the inevitable happens. Javier will hold off as much as he can, really he will, for the sake of his job and budding friendship with Romeo… if she ever decides to be explicit in her demands, however, it’s going to take a lot of willpower to not give in.

Once the bike is secured and she’s in the cruiser, he hops back into the driver’s seat and begins the drive into town.

The ride is silent at first, Paloma shoving her face in front of the small vents on the passenger side and letting the gust of air cool her down. He catches glimpses from his peripheral as she digs through her bag to pull out a satin handkerchief, wiping her face and neck, then her thighs.

He can’t help as his stare follows the motion of her dragging the fabric along her smooth and sweaty skin. Almost jealous of the damn thing, imagining it to be his touch instead.

“I wouldn’t be in this predicament had my car been fixed…” she breaks their silence, peeking over at him as she fixes up her hair. It’s clear he understands the implication behind her words.

“I did volunteer myself to take a look at it, didn’t I?” Javier responds as she sprits some perfume onto her wrists and behind her ear, rolling on some deodorant and just like that Paloma’s freshened up. Now the cab of his cruiser smells like her and it’s going to drive him fucking insane.

“If I remember correctly, yes.” He stops at an intersection, finally being able to look at her properly.

“You free Saturday?”

“You askin’ me out on a date?” Paloma’s eyes twinkle in pure mischief.

“Your dad would kill me if I did that.”

“In front of the whole town, too. Make an example outta you.”

“I’m tryin’ to steer very clear of that, so no, baby, unfortunately I’m not askin’ you out on a date. I’ve got time to stop by and take a look at it before I go in for my shift.”

Paloma purses her lips in thought as Javier trudges forward, the terrain changing from dirt road to asphalt as they near the library.

“Yeah, you can come by at lunch. Daddy’s out all weekend on some huntin’ trip with his friends so… I’ll be home alone.” It’s tantalizing, the way she drops that tidbit of information at the end. Javier is well aware of Romeo’s absence but he hadn’t stopped to think what that meant for him and Paloma.

As if there is a him and Paloma.

She flirts and eyes him like she would let him have his way with her but she is also strong-willed and and clever enough to be leading him on.

He’s just now built some rapport with her and he doesn’t want to jeopardize it. They can continue flirting without crossing the physical threshold.

“Alright, nena, I’ll see you at lunch Saturday.” He’s in front of the main entrance to the building now.

“It’s a date, officer.”

“You must want me dead.” He huffs.

“Don’t worry, I won’t tell him.” She pauses, biting down on her lower lip, “It’ll be our little secret.” Paloma whispers before opening the door.

He begins to swell in his pants as her voice drops into a whisper, words coated in seductive suggestion at the idea of them fooling around inconspicuously.

“Wait, your bike—” He’s already reaching down to unbuckle himself when she stops him, leaning in through the open window of the now closed door.

“Don’t worry about it. You can take me home later. I get off at 6.” She winks at him, pulling back and turning on her heels to walk inside.

Javier slumps in his seat, head falling back against the headrest as he reminds himself how fucked he is.

When Saturday afternoon rolls around, Javier’s heart is racing in anticipation of his alone time with Paloma at the Leighton residence.

All week he’s been plagued with profane scenarios of what could potentially unfold. Partially because he hasn’t gotten laid since returning stateside but also for his unwavering carnal desire for her.

The fact that she is irrevocably off limits only intensifies his yearning. He wants Paloma so bad because he can’t have her.

That’s lead to him finishing into his fist in the shower, images of her kneeled before him with her mouth wrapped around his cock at the forefront of his mind.

The first time it had happened, he felt like a damn teenager getting off to a crush. But then it continued to happen and at that point he just let his fantasies run amuck.

It’s not like he’d ever tell her or anyone for that matter, so his illicit imagination will continue to be just that: fleeting thoughts. Guilty pleasures only he can indulge in.

He pulls onto the property with ease, cutting the engine and sitting there for a minute to collect himself. It’s embarrassing for Javier to give himself a pep talk at his grown age, ‘keep your shit together’ his new mantra.

With his metallic toolbox in hand, he’s ready to knock against the screen door when he hears music playing faintly nearby. He follows the tune, rounding the corner of the wraparound porch to the backyard.

The music is recognizable now, a Fleetwood Mac song and his eyes fall on the girl lounging peacefully.

Paloma’s in a hammock, her long legs crossed over one another and hanging from the side. She’s reading a romance novel, he notes, from the incredibly cliché cover of a buff man with a half dressed woman in his grasp. He can faintly hear her humming along to the song, fingers tapping in rhythm against the hardcover of the book.

“Hola muñequita.” Javier greets suavely which has her peeking over her book then smiling wildly when she sees him.

“You made it!” Paloma excitedly stands from her spot, allowing him get a better look at her. She’s got on a red bikini top and a jean mini skirt. He wasn’t prepared to see this much of her bare skin and it throws him off entirely. So much for that pep talk.

It is a magnificent sight, though. Thankfully his sunglasses shield her from his wandering gaze, but with the intensity of his stare, she can probably feel it.

Javier knows her figure is divine, all the different outfits she wears both around town and on stage showcased her assets tastefully. However, seeing her in a top that’s almost too small and a skirt that’s definitely too short has those desires of his ramping up viciously.

It doesn’t help that she’s got a dainty, golden cross necklace hanging from her neck. It rests tantalizingly against the smooth skin right above the swell of her breasts. So many things he fantasizes about doing to her and none of them holy. The piece of jewelry reminds him that he needs to back off.

Amidst his leering, Javier notices a faint scar running from the left side of her hip up to below her breast and he’s curious to know how it got there.

“You had an inclination that I wouldn’t make it?” He returns to the conversation before it’s painfully obvious that he’s checking her out.

Paloma smirks, meeting him halfway as he descends the steps of the porch to approach her. Her hands cross behind her back and she stares up at him through her mascara coated lashes. “Figured you’d probably wanna spend your Saturday afternoon at home instead of playin’ mechanic.” She sways lightly and he narrows his eyes at her.

He can see right through her act, not that she’s being very subtle.

“I’m a man of my word. Already been puttin’ off this visit longer than I should have.” He can’t help himself from bringing his finger up to twirl a strand of her hair, enjoying the silkiness of it against his touch before letting it fall softly against her.

If they hold their gaze a second longer, one of them will break and while Javier is certain that it’d be blissful, it would also be a mistake.

“Here, I’ll take you to her. She’s in the shed.” It’s like she can read his mind, nudging her head in the direction of the small structure and she turns to begin leading him there, in which he follows wordlessly, not being elusive at all as he gets a better look at her from this angle. The skirt is just barely covering the curve of her ass, and a flash of red is revealed each time she takes a step.

He bites down on his tongue harshly, adverting his gaze and thinking of literally anything else to keep his erection away.

He surveys the area of the backyard, not seeing a pool or any body of water nearby and he wonders why she has the bathing suit on.

Not that it should matter to him. She’s probably just tanning, you pervert. It’s hotter than hell out today.

Paloma’s humming again as she goes to remove the wooden plank that keeps the door of the shed closed, grunting as she struggles to pull it free. The soft sounds she emits do nothing but make it harder for him to show some fucking resilience.

“Do you need help—” Javier’s cut off as she successfully slides the thick piece off, resting it against the metal wall and dusting her hands off on her skirt.

“Appreciate it, though.” She flashes him a toothy grin, the wide doors creak as she pulls them open; revealing a beautiful vintage car.

Javier lets out a low whistle, perching his sunglasses on the top of his head and placing his toolbox on the ground as he walks around the vehicle to get a better look at it.

His hands fall to his hips, circling the area slowly and shaking his head in disbelief. “You’re tellin’ me the mechanic didn’t jump at the chance to fix this thing?”

“Like you said, most men are idiots.” He can’t help but laugh, exhaling from his nose.

“S’always interestin’ to see it in practice.” He returns to the front of the car, propping open the hood and getting a better look inside. “You got the keys?”

“In the visor.” She replies, “Good luck tryin’ to get her to start. All she does is stutter before given’ out entirely.”

Javi makes a note of that, acknowledging her with a hum, already seeing a few things out of place and he’s eager to get to working on it.

Before turning to law enforcement, Javi had the inkling to become a mechanic. Plenty of his uncles worked in auto shops and he has vivid memories of spending hours there with them learning everything he could under their supervision.

Experiences he holds near and dear to his heart, it’s part of the reason why he’s so clever and dexterous.

“I’ve got some stuff I gotta get done. Try not to miss me…” Paloma’s voice rings out and Javier hadn’t noticed that he zoned out.

He glances at her over his shoulder, “I’m more interested in gettin’ to know Darla, if I’m bein’ honest with you, hermosa.”

Paloma had to excuse herself before she quite literally jumped on Javier and had him take her against the hood of her car. The way he looked with his hands on his hips, eyes focused on admiring the vehicle had left her in a trance that she was sure if she stared any longer, she would have started drooling.

Something about the promise of seeing him sweaty and greased up had her mind spiraling with different erotic fantasies that would surely send her to straight to hell.

So she properly lets him be, busying herself with a few chores she has to get done before leaving for the creek with Sloane later. It is the first time Paloma will be meeting August and she’s nervous even though she doesn’t look it.

She finished the book Slo had passed on to her in a matter of days, intrigued to learn more about August’s ideas and the concepts he’s clearly very passionate about. When she relayed this over to Slo, the middleman between the two, she wasted no time in conjuring up a plan for them to meet. Originally, it was going to be more intimate with just the two of them but Paloma stressed that she was not ready for that so Sloane was quick to make it a group affair by suggesting they hang out by the creek.

It’s why she is currently clad in a bathing suit, with the summer at full send; being down by the water seemed like the best way to spend the latter half of her afternoon.

Right now, though, she’s more focused on not trying to fuck her dad’s friend slash co-worker.

Some time passes, and when Paloma takes a look out in the direction of the shed, she sees that he’s ditched his flannel, leaving him in a white undershirt and his broad shoulders are now on full display as he leans over the hood.

That’s when she sees it. It glistens beneath the sunlight, a silver pistol tucked between his jeans at his lower back. She knows officers carry a weapon on them at all times, but the unorthodox placing of Javier’s further adds to the appeal of this alluring man. God damn him and his desirability.

Paloma’s mind now wanders to the repeated wet dream she keeps having, the one where Javier takes her on the wooden railing of the porch. Specifically, the variation where he’s kneeled in front of her, her dress covering his face as he devours her entirely.

She interlocks her fingers in his hair and tugs at it, in which he responds by wrapping his lips around her clit and sucking on it harshly. That leaves her wailing and panting his name over and over and over again…

The force in which her thighs clench together is enough to snap her out of her delusions. She’s no better than a man, really, and she huffs to herself as she reenters the house to grab the six pack of beers, her guitar and notebook before sauntering over to him.

She’s more than capable of handling just being around Javier without thinking sinfully. It’s why she’s walking like a woman with a purpose, trying to prove to herself that she can be totally normal about this… budding friendship she has with him.

“How’s it goin’ in here?” Her voice cuts through the sound of the radio that continues to play softly. She brought it in here for him to have some entertainment before she hurried off to the house.

Javier pulls back, lips twitching up into a smirk as he eyes the beers in her hand. “Goin’ fine. Whoever you took her to really fucked it up. No wonder he couldn’t figure out what the problem was. It’s everythin’.” Back of his hand wipes sweat from his brow, some of his hair matted against his damp skin. “I thought you didn’t drink.”

“Never said that. I just said on occasion.” She reminds him, popping the cap off of two beers then handing him one. He thanks her softly, wiping his hand on the already stained rag and tucking it into his back pocket.

Her knees almost go weak at the action, but she’s a woman on a mission, remember?

“So what’s the occasion today?”

“It’s hot as fuck outside.” They share a laugh and tap their bottles together before taking a long sip.

“And the guitar?”

Paloma sits on the wooden chair nearby, her spot whenever she comes in here to keep her dad company while he’s in the middle of building something. Most recently, some planter boxes she’d requested for their garden.

“I figured since I had some new company, I could play something for you. It helps move the writing process along.” She kicks her sandals off, tucking her legs beneath her and laying the guitar across her lap.

“I’m getting a peek behind the curtain of Paloma Leighton’s illustrious writing process? Well, I’m truly honored,” he remarks, dripping with sarcasm. She rolls her eyes at his jest but can’t help but chuckle, taking another sip of her beverage and downing it in one gulp.

She catches the intensity of his gaze lingering on her throat, tracing the subtle movements with each swallow. Paloma can’t help but entertain the thought: does he fantasize about her as she does about him?

“Don’t feel too special. I’m always playin’ somethin’ for someone.” She sets the finished bottle aside, thumbing through her notebook until she finds the adequate page and folds the tattered front so that it lays flat on the thick arm of the chair.

As she does this, Javier lights a cigarette and puffs out a cloud of gray smoke. “You do it all yourself?” She can hear the curiosity in his tone and for some reason, it makes her blush.

“For the most part. The band just helps bring it all together. They add the umph to it… s’not always the case, though. Sometimes I oversee the entirety of it. From the lyrics to the melody and everything in between. It’s real fun.” She begins to tune her guitar, brows pulling in concentration as her ears perk up to catch any inconsistencies until she’s thoroughly pleased with how it sounds.

Javier remains silent, his fond gaze lingering on her as he takes a drag from his cigarette. With practiced ease, he lifts the beer bottle to his lips, alternating between the two vices at a leisurely pace. As he delves deeper into understanding her, the allure intensifies, dangerously blurring the lines between flirtation and something more profound.

Something more. He’s trying real fucking hard not to see it like that.

Javi’s never been inclined to seek deeper connections with his partners. Emotions and commitments tend to complicate matters, a burden he’s well-acquainted with in his already convoluted life. He sees no need to add unnecessary strain by entering into half-hearted relationships.

This is why he exclusively pursues sex, seeking gratification without the complications of emotional entanglements. His experiences in Colombia, where he didn’t mind paying for intimacy, epitomized this mindset. There, a mutual understanding prevailed: their encounters were solely about shared pleasure, with no expectation of anything beyond.

In the short months that he’s been here, Javi has finally began finding some kind of peace in Seminary, all things considered, and while fucking the sheriff’s daughter would be a bad move— catching feelings for her would be a hundred times worse.

“It’s a little morbid, m’still workin’ on it and it’s fairly short. S’just the chorus.” Javier nods, letting her know that he’s listening as she begins to sing.

“If I die young, bury me in satin Lay me down on a bed of roses, Sink me in the river at dawn Send me away with the words of a love song. The sharp knife of a short life, Now I know there’s no such thing as enough time.”

Her voice is softer, southern accent complimenting her strums on the guitar and while he enjoys the electrifying performances she puts on stage; he loves hearing her like this.

Rich and smooth. Like miel (honey).

“You’re right, it is morbid.” He comments, truthfully, and Paloma lets out a breath.

“I tried not lettin’ what happened to Nina get into my writing. No need to keep dwellin’ on it but damn is it hard to keep it away. Figured I’d just get it out of my system and get back to workin’ on my other stuff.”

“There’s nothin’ wrong with dwelling on it…” He begins tentatively, already sensing a pang of regret for broaching the subject. Once more, he finds himself grappling with the challenge of articulating his thoughts effectively.

“I know, but for my peace of mind it’s best I just get on with it.” Her shoulders rise and fall in a shrug, fingers plucking at the guitar strings again.

For the next hour or so, they immerse themselves in conversation, delving into a wide array of topics. While Javier meticulously tends to the car’s engine, Paloma remains by his side, offering her company. Amidst their discussions, they explore trivial details about each other’s lives: favorite movies, food preferences, and other basic facts. Through these exchanges, Javier learns of Paloma’s irrational fear of reptiles, her affinity for sleeping with her windows open, and her distinct preference for waffles over pancakes.

Javier indulges in the easy flow of their conversation, sharing with her his fondness for spy novels, his penchant for card games, and reminiscing about his favorite arepa spot in Bogotá.

The latter captivates her, drawing her focus entirely. “I can’t wrap my head around the fact that you lived there for such a long time. It’s just unimaginable to me... A completely different country... so fascinating.” She muses, her tone tinged with wistfulness.

He’s eager to shift away from this subject, recognizing her genuine curiosity and good intentions. However, he’s apprehensive about delving into discussions about his past work and experiences, topics he’s not ready to broach. With a brief, dismissive response, he seeks to subtly steer the conversation in a different direction.

“Yup, lotta crazy shit…” He returns his attention to the engine and Paloma catches the hint and doesn’t say much else after.

“Paloma!” The sudden call of her name has them both turning their heads to the opened doors of the shed where he sees a girl her age standing on the porch, searching the area until her eyes fall on the two of them and she beelines in their direction.

“I’ve been knockin’ on your front door like a crazed woman for the past five minutes! There’s a random truck parked out there, what’re you doin’—” When the girl’s gaze lands on Javier, her entire body language switches and he raises his brows at the change. “I didn’t know you had company. Who’s this handsome fella?”

Javier is accustomed to captivating the attention of women, especially the striking ones. They consistently cast him that same flirtatious glance, their gestures taking on an added want of attention. This encounter proves to be no exception. With her bottom lip captured between her teeth, she checks him out not so subtly, her gaze lingering on his toned arms before returning to meet his gaze, a playful spark dancing in her eyes.

Maybe this is exactly what he needs: a diversion to divert his attention from Paloma. Despite his intense desire for her, he knows it would only lead to complications in the future.

Pursuing women younger than himself is not the path he wishes to tread, especially since he (allegedly) left his playboy days behind in Colombia in pursuit of a fresh start.

Yet, amidst his longing for Paloma and the current lack of romantic encounters, Javier finds it difficult to view things in this new perspective.

Always thinking with the wrong head. It’s his achilles heel.

“Javi. What’s your name, gorgeous?” He smirks flirtatiously, wiping his hands clean on the rag again and reaching out to take her hand in his in a handshake.

“Sloane.” She squeezes his hand gently before letting go, sultry smile still present on her countenance.

“Sloane, pleasure to meet you sweetheart.”

Paloma doesn’t like the nasty feeling she gets as she watches the interaction. It’s clear as day that they’re flirting, and honestly what did she expect out of her best friend, and now, charming acquaintance?

She’s well aware of his rapport in Colombia and the daily flirtatious behavior towards her. Paloma’s also aware of how willing Slo is to fuck anything in her line of vision. Yet, not being on the receiving end of the former is odd and has her feeling things she doesn’t want to feel.

What really has her skin crawling is the way he calls her sweetheart and introduces himself as Javi. He’s never told her to call him that.

Honestly, she probably would have felt more green if he had called her hermosa or any of the other Spanish names of endearment he’s reserved for her.

Reserved for her? She sounds so possessive.

Sloane giggles, “You’re the one who’s been followin’ her around all over town on daddy’s orders, huh? P, you didn’t tell me he was this hot. I woulda told you to count your blessings had I known.” They exchange a look that Paloma really can’t stand catch sight of, so she interjects.

“Sorry I lost track of time. Javier’s been lookin’ at Darla tryna fix her.” His name rolls of her tongue smoothly and this has a smug smile sprouting on his face.

No cowboy or officer or Mr. Peña. Just Javier.

She gets up from her seat, sliding her sandals back on and leaving her belongings where they lay.

“There’s a part or two that’s missin’ but it shouldn’t be hard to get ‘em. Other than that, my work here is done.” He turns his back to the two girls and Sloane mouths over to her.

Oh my god?!

Paloma shoots her a look as Javier slams the hood of the car closed.

“Thank you, Javier, I really appreciate you doin’ this for me.” Her tone is genuine, despite the jealousy that had consumed her just then.

“No problem, cariño, I’ll let you know when I get my hands on those missin’ parts.”

“That sounds great! How much do I owe you for—” He cuts her off with a wave of his hand, collecting his things.

“Don’t worry about it. M’doin’ this out of the kindness of my heart. S’what you do for a friend, right?” Speaking of hearts, hers skips a beat at being considered a friend and she feels her cheeks getting hot. Get a grip!

“Yeah, I guess so.” Paloma refrains from saying thank you again, not wanting to overdo it but she really is appreciative of his hard work.

Maybe she could find another way to show just how much she appreciates him doing this for her.

“Gabriel’s waitin’ for us out front, baby. We’re already runnin’ late.” Slo’s voice snaps her back to reality and she nods. Javier clears his throat and side steps her.

“Hope y’all have fun. Be safe, hermosa. Call me if you need anythin’.” Warmth spreads within her chest at his words, which would have annoyed her had they been coming from anyone else.

There has definitely been a shift in their dynamic, but she can’t quite place what it is. The bitterness she felt just then definitely a factor.

“Sloane, darling, hopefully I’ll see you ‘round town soon.” And just like that, the warmth is gone as he addresses her best friend, a wink thrown in her direction before he’s leaving the two girls in the shed.

“Okay, you have a lot to catch me up on. Frankly, I’m pissed you haven’t sent him in my direction. I mean, look at him. That’s a whole man right there, dear lord I was about to cum just by shakin’ his hand!” Paloma cringes but she doesn’t let it show, instead pulling excitement from their afternoon plans to uplift her mood.

“How about we get goin’ before Gabriel ditches our asses and we’re left walkin’ all the way down there.”

It’s not much longer after that that they make it to their destination and Paloma rejoices in the feeling of the cool water against her hot skin. She ditched her mini skirt along the way, currently sitting in a more shallow end, head falling back against her shoulders as she soaks in the sun.

She can hear Gabriel and Sloane splashing around nearby, and she contemplates joining them when the sound of her name gets her attention.

“Paloma, yeah?”

She head snaps in the direction of the voice and her breath gets stuck in her throat once she sees the source.

He stands tall, his figure slightly lanky but gracefully lean, his golden locks tousled. His eyes, a light shade of blue and captivating, hold a magnetic charm.

With a quick glance, she takes in the intricate tapestry of tattoos adorning his skin. They seem to complement him perfectly, she muses, adding an extra layer of intrigue to his already handsome appearance.

And for the second time in such a short period of time— Paloma finds herself subtly squirming in her spot, a familiar sensation stirring within her legs.

This man, though, much more age appropriate and everything about him screams intriguing.

“Depends who’s askin’.” She can’t help but tease, one eye closed and her right hand coming up to block the sun from hitting her face directly. She’d forgotten her sunglasses at home and that annoyed the shit out of her once she realized.

“A friend of a friend. May I?” Gestures to the empty spot in the shallow water besides her and she nods, “You’re much prettier than I remember.”

Eyes follow him as she lowers himself besides her, their bodies softly brushing up against one another and she shivers slightly despite the blazing temperature, “We’ve met before? No way, I definitely would have remembered you…”

“Technically— no we haven’t met but… I was with Slo that day at the library. M’August.” He introduces himself and her stomach knots.

That’s when it hits her, a very vague recollection but a recollection of him nevertheless.

“Right, wow, that feels like forever ago.” She shakes her head, gently swaying her hand beneath the water. Suddenly, she feels much more nervous. She’d spent a good part of her week obsessing over his book and now he’s sitting right next to her while they’re both half naked.

His explicit poem comes to mind and she shakes that thought away quickly before her whole body turns into a bright shade of red.

“Time is a very tricky concept. You want these?” He conjures up a pair of shades and her brows raise at the action. “Noticed you’ve been scowlin’ ‘cause of the sunlight.”

A small smile spreads on her lips and she nods, he passes the accessory over to her and their fingers touch briefly against each other and she swears she feels fireworks.

Paloma really has to stop being such a helpless romantic. That never ends good for anyone involved.

“Thank you, August. You’re so observant.” She slips them on and lets out a small sigh, her head falling back between her shoulders.

She can feel his eyes all over her, but she doesn’t mind it. “Slo tells me you’re a fan of my work?”

She can’t help the laugh that slips from her lips and her eyes widen once she realizes that that wasn’t the most appropriate reaction for her to have. “That… came out really wrong. I’m so sorry.” She shakes her head at herself, “I did enjoy the Paragons of the Sacrificed book.” Is honest in her opinion, looking straight ahead at the glistening body of water to avoid further embarrassment by looking at him.

“Don’t apologize, I know Slo has a tendency to… over-exaggerate.” They shared an amused laugh at the expense of their friend but it’s all in good fun. She feels some of her nerves lessen.

“I am happy to hear that you enjoyed the book, though. S’the whole point why I wrote it. Sharin’ new things to new people.” He explains.

“New things, indeed. You cited a lot of notable publishings. Got me lookin’ more into the history of religion… I can’t help but feel a little ignorant, y’know? So much knowledge out there and I’m so… uneducated.” Paloma scoffs at herself, self depreciation at its finest.

“Oh, that just isn’t true, little dove.” The nickname has Paloma looking over at him; he’s gives her such a warm and charming look that sends the butterflies in her stomach into a flurry. “Is it alright if I call you that? Seems very fitting… paloma is dove in Spanish.” A fact she’s very well aware of, since her mother reminded her about it all the time growing up.

“Yeah, I quite like that. No one’s ever really called me it before.” She replies almost sheepishly and he brings his large hand down to rest on her knee which has her breath hitching in her throat.

“Doves represent peace, love and purity … your parents sure did somethin’ namin’ you that.” His squeezes his grip on her knee briefly before pulling his hand back.

Pure? That’s possibly the last word she’d ever used to describe herself.

“As I was sayin’... throughout your life, others’ opinions have shaped your perspective. Eventually, you decide to see the world through your own eyes. Do some explorin’ of your own. It might take time to reach this realization, but what’s important is your willingness to learn and challenge conventional beliefs. So much knowledge out there, s’up to you to seek it and form your own opinions. S’way better than just followin’ what other people want you to think. Bit hypocritical comin’ from me considerin’ the group I lead but that’s different.”

Unbeknownst to Paloma, she finds herself captivated by every word that escapes his lips, hanging on to each syllable as if they were precious gems. His voice carries an irresistible attractiveness, his words akin to twinkling stars scattered across the vast expanse of a darkened sky.

He’s leading her to him… towards something in the same way constellations help sailors navigate the sea.

They spend the rest of the day just… talking. He delves deeper into the intricacies of a group he belongs to—individuals adrift in the world, much like himself. Together, they’ve traveled through the majority of Texas, exchanging stories and delving into philosophical musings, united in their quest for deeper meaning and connection to something greater than themselves.

That leads Paloma to learn that he’s from Fayette, which is a few towns south, and that he, Sloane, and Gabriel all grew up in the same trailer park together. They’re the closest thing I have to a family is what August tells her and she feels sentimental as the statement tugs at her heartstrings.

She also learns that all three of them have a criminal past, which surprises her entirely and he explains to her that it was during their adolescence and it wasn’t anything major. Just stupid shit to pass the time.

She believes him without asking any further questions.

It’s not until they’re both getting bitten up by mosquitos that they decide it’s time to head back.

“It’s finally nice to put a face to the name, August. I hope I get to see you again… maybe read another one of your books?” Paloma bites her lip as they walk side by side.

“Likewise. Next time I’ll make sure to bring it to you personally. Don’t need Slo playin’ messenger and misconstruing our words.”

They make it back to Gabriel’s truck, he and Slo leaning against it and sharing a joint as they eye the duo. Paloma slips her skirt back on.

“‘Bout fuckin’ time. I need a shower, bad.” Sloane huffs, passing the joint to Paloma whom rejects it which gets an eye roll out of her friend and then handing it over to August who accepts it with no hesitation.

Paloma sees a motorcycle nearby and her curiosity gets the best of her, “S’that your ride, August?” She flips her hair over her shoulder, looking at him. He lustfully eyes the exposed skin of her neck and shoulders before nodding.

“Sure is. You ever been on one before?” Thick smoke emits from his lips and nose as he passes the joint back over to Gabriel who finishes it off wordlessly.

He’s so quiet, Paloma observes, but her attention returns to August.

“No. They look real cool, though.”

“You should let me take you home. Give you your first ride on one, little dove.” The offer is rather suggestive and she doesn’t mind it. She’s very interested in getting to know him better.

Paloma would have taken him up on it had she not been wearing the outfit that currently adorns her body. “Maybe next time.” She smiles at him softly and he nods, she looks away sheepishly as she blushes.

They share their goodbyes then she’s piling in to Gabriel’s truck after Sloane and on her way back home.

The day’s events echo through her thoughts as she gazes out of the window, Javier’s presence now intertwined with that of August’s. A sense of excitement bubbles within her, unfamiliar yet exhilarating—the attention she’s receiving is unlike anything she’s experienced before.

Two distinctly attractive and intriguing men have unexpectedly entered her life, each leaving an indelible mark. Rather than overcomplicating matters, Paloma resolves to embrace the moment and allow things to unfold naturally. It’s a thrilling prospect, injecting a sense of excitement into her life that she hasn’t felt in quite some time.

“Oh fuck.” Paloma curses as she sees her father’s vehicle parked by the front yard and him sitting out on the porch.

Looks like he’s gotten back from his hunting trip early. It is nearing ten o’clock and she knows she’s about to be interrogated on her whereabouts.

She’s relieved that she hadn’t taken August up on his offer to bring her home on his motorcycle. Now that would have sent poor Romeo over the edge.

“Oh, baby, I feel for you.” Slo pats her thigh compassionately and Paloma groans. Dread creeps up her spine making her wither uncomfortably.

“He wasn’t supposed to be back ‘til tomorrow mornin’. Ugh, he’s so not goin’ to let this go.” The truck stops and both Gabriel and Slo flash her an understanding yet somber look.

“Thanks for the ride. I’ll call you tomorrow, ‘kay Slo?” The girl nods and they both hug before she’s exiting the vehicle and preparing herself for what’s to come. Paloma tugs her skirt down, noticing that it had ridden up much higher than what was appropriate.

“Where the hell have you been, girl?” He asks once she’s close enough to survey him. He’s drinking, that’s never a good sign.

“We went out by the creek and—”

“The creek? With who? At this time of night? Paloma, how can you be so reckless. Especially with what the hell has been goin’ on around here?!”

Anger contorts her features, her expression tightening with indignation as he addresses her as though she were a wayward teenager, rather than a capable woman out in the company of her friends.

“And dressed like that.” The tone in his voice makes something within her snap and she crosses her arm with attitude, getting defensive.

“Like what? I was by the water and I’m wearin’ a bathin’ suit. S’that illegal now?” Paloma is so ready to go inside, shower, and get in her bed.

“Is this what you do when I’m not around? Sneakin’ off lookin’ for trouble in the dead of night?”

“It’s only ten and I really didn’t expect to stay out this long. I got preoccupied. Why are you makin’ such a big deal outta this?” She defends herself and it’s ridiculous, really, that she even has to.

He doesn’t say anything else and she just rolls her eyes. “I’m goin’ inside.” And that’s exactly what she does, walking right past him and indoors where she intends to take a very long, hot shower to help her forget about this spat of theirs.

Their arguments follow a familiar pattern: he erupts with emotion, then retreats into silence. Occasionally, he offers apologies, while other times, they linger unspoken. Paloma, however, is well-versed in navigating her father’s dramatic outbursts, having grown accustomed to them over time. It’s not the theatrics that trouble her; rather, it’s enduring it that proves challenging.

The shower runs while she takes a good, long look at herself in the mirror.

Paloma finds herself approaching a crucial juncture, feeling increasingly prepared to confront her father in a heart-to-heart conversation. This discussion, she knows, will culminate in her revealing her decision to leave town and prioritize her own needs for once. While the thought of causing her father pain weighs heavily on her heart, she recognizes the necessity of taking this step in order to forge her own path in her life.

The steam rises from the hot water, gradually filling the room with its thick, swirling embrace. Paloma’s reflection blurs and fades amidst the steam, prompting her to shed her clothes. With each layer discarded, she feels a sense of liberation, a moment of vulnerability before she finally steps into the welcoming cascade of the shower.

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