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bausbitch · 4 years

Text

I'm sorry

Reid x reader

ANGST AHAHA

Req but @blankets-for-bees

Warnings: kidnapping, established relationship, gunshot, Spencer being an ass at first, also this IS NOT really funny as my other works //read: I'll try because I'm just such a naturally good comedian,,,or a mental asylum escapee,,// 🤩 OH and a happy ending

Spencer had been,,,,

Awfully cold to you

For the last 6 months

Yeah, it was beginning to get on your nerves

It felt like living with a whole ghost 👻

And it wasn't like it was his work

You two had the same job for fucks sake

You even shared a home

But lately

Spencer would ONLY talk to you at work

And only when it was life or death

So basically when hotch paired you two up

And omg

The team

They had no idea

So they insisted you two sleep in the same room on this case

Bc you two are their fav couple!!!!!

But they didn't know that for the last six months

You were practically single

Except you couldn't go anywhere

And you wouldn't go out to flirt with people

Because you were a good s/o

*cough* unlike Spencer *cough*

Ok so this usub

The universe said

Fuck you, yn yln 🤩🤪🤡

This particular unsub

Kidnapped failing couples

And threw them in a house

A giant doll house

And sedated them

And played with them like dolls

And made them kiss and stuff

Idk how to explain it

Like when you were little

And you didn't know you really LIKED liked girls

But you were always making your Frankie and ghoulia monster high dolls kiss in the first grade????

Or like

I think it's like ep 12 season 5

My best friend and I watched that one

Sigh

I miss her

Anyways

When you finally moved rooms

You walked in

And it felt like the weight of the world was lifted

Off of your shoulders

Don't worry the world is still pretty heavy

Issok though the world doesn't have to be a skinny legend

WAIT

This is supposed to be an angst

AHEM

Angsty angst angst

So you were like

Hell yeah

I'm gonna go chill in the jacuzzi

Then I'm gonna come back

And I'm gonna have a level head

Key words: come back

See, I don't think you have the facilities for that, big man

Okokok

So you were vibing in the jacuzzi

Then you saw Spencer

And

Gasp!

A woman that didn't look like any of the girls on the team was going into his room!!

You knew

You were being irrational

But you were like

Son of a bitch >:(

Alexa play jealousy by Monsta x

Anny. W. Ays

You went into the room

Or at least you knocked

And gasp

She answered

She seemed,,,

Suspicious

Probably bc she's the unsub yn you dumb bitch

And you were like

"Hey is Spencer in there?"

Like you WEREN'T his h*cking gf

And she straight up

PUNCHES YOU

Ok more like

Knocks you out with a blow to the face

And draws you inside

Ok now Spencers pov bc you're getting too much attention and he needs an explanation for making me play jealousy

Spencer

Oh god that I don't believe in how do I explain him

He was having a tough time

Ok wbk he's smart as hell

But when I comes to people who are FINE

Such as yourself

He gets a lil

*Patrick star from Spongebob noises*

Even if you guys had literally been dating for like

Five? Six? Years

He was starting to get scared

Ok so you guys had said the L world

You said it all the time

But

Spencer

He wanted to propose to you

On one knee

Ring and everything

But he was scared

He was really really scared

Bc he wouldn't know what to do if you said no

Which

Why would you

You two were practically already married

You literally had a drunken, unofficial ceremony at Rossi's place one time

But he felt like

You wouldn't be ready

So he was like

Ok gotta set up a back up plan

If they reject me

And I have to go to work and see them

How do I not see them

How do I live without them?

I ignore them

😌

Plan: set

Spencer : fucking idiot

SO HE

He acted like you weren't there

And he eventually thought you were mad at him

Bc you weren't reaching out any more

Dumb bitch they think YOU'RE mad at them

Okokokok

Back to kidnapping

When he woke up

He was,,,,

*drum roll*

In a house?

A really nice house

Or at least the bedroom was nice

Or the roof of it

And what he could see from his peripheral vision

He could see you though

He could feel you

You were laying on his chest

Your arms around him

And he could tell you were still asleep

His serotonin levels went up higher than they had in months

Over the last six months he hadn't said a word

And he'd let you sleep on the couch

Smh and I thought he was a genius

But he missed you

But he had to make sure he was ready

To be honest

He probably knew what he was doing was irrational and the definition of idiotic

He also knew that by doing this he was maximising his chances of you not wanting to marry him

But he just

"Y'all hear smth?" -Spencer Reid, about his problems

Annie Oakley

Anyways

While he was too busy making heart eyes at your sleeping figure

Ya boy forgot to check if he could move

Turns out,,,,

He couldn't

Bc,,,,

*puts hands together like cat in the hat does*

This unsub, like I said before

SEDATED YOU TWO

So he waited

Until

The woman he unwillingly let into his hotel room, all by the service of a gun and a threat to his life 😄

Came and did whatever the fuck she was gonna do

Play with you guys more than my 6th grade crush played with my heart

And she did😋🥳🤩!!!!

But don't fret

She wasn't gonna hurt you

You had actually concluded the deaths were accidental

Just like me

Okoko so

She was strong

Like really fucking strong

Because she hauled both you and Spence

Into a little dining room

And served and fed you breakfast

You were connected to iv tubes

But still

But everything

The creepiest detail

According to me at least 💁✨

Was how all the food and everything

Were wood

Toys for kids

Or something karuna satori would use in an asmr video

You woke up in the middle of,,,

Watching a movie on the couch with Spencer????

It was still daytime

Or so you thought

Bc the unsub pulled up

WITH A GUN

You don't have many things in life rn, but here's a list if things you do have, to cheer you up 😋

A lovely hole in your arm! V v useful for holding very small, thin, cups!!!

A v sad Spencer Reid! Comes with his own tears and despair!!! How fun!

And last but not least!

A wonderful speech from our sponsor!! //read: the unsub//

"Why must everything bad always happen to me! You two are very bad dolls! No one is a good doll, you're all useless and now I have to kill you >:("

Lmfao why does she sound like my bratty baby cousin

Anyways

"The FBI is at the door! Which one of you called them? You whore! It was probably you!"

First of all,,, how dare she

You didn't even THINK about other men in the 6 months your boyFRIEND ghosted you

Jokes on her

Second of all

You were bleeding out and Spencer was wiggling behind you

Probably a victory dance smh 😤

But then

GASP!!!

she went upstairs 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️

And you heard voices

Morgan!!! Hotch!!! *insert police's name*!!

Then you passed out bc

💥bloodloss💥

And when you woke up

Spencer was fine

Physically

But he was hunched over

"Yn I'm so sorry. I love you so much and I was so scared I'd lose you if I proposed too early, and now I'm probably going to lose you without even saying a word. Honey I love you, I love you so much-"

And you were like

Hold up

LET GO OF MY HAND MF YOU MAY BE SKINNY BUT YOUR STRONG WTF

Then

"Did you say purpose?"

And he was like

"Yes(?) "

And you kissed him for the first time in sixth months

"Yes I'll marry, now let go of my hand"

#criminal minds #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x you #aaron hotch hotchner #agent hotchner #aaron hotchner #derek morgan #jj #criminal minds x y/n #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds x oc

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sergeant-donny-donowitz · 4 years

Text

Remembering You (Hugo Stiglitz x Reader)

Requested by @mbluxaeterna

@owba-chan @war-obsessed @inglourious-imagines @tealaquinn @struggling-bee @frozenhuntress67 @kwyloz @sodapop182 @marlenemarauders @what-the--curtains @taikawho

Let me know if you wanna be added to the IB or OUATIH taglists! :) _______________________

Normally....you would have been thrilled to meet the basterds. Hell, you could have made an unstoppable team, had they encountered you at any other possible moment in time. But of course, it's now. Now, when you are a lone, rogue soldier. Now, after you've lost your team. Now, when everything around you is oh-so-incriminating.

Naturally, they took you in for interrogating, and cuffed you. "You gon' tell us who you are, or you gon' keep on lying?" You rolled your eyes, "I've told you a million times. I am not a nazi." The fact that you'd been accused of it was enough to make your skin crawl. "Then what are you doing out here, alone?" Donny prodded at you with his bat, which was meant to be threatening given its fame...but it really just annoyed you. "Same as you. Killing nazis." "Got a pretty lil German accent there," Aldo snorted some tobacco, and went on matter of factly, "So-" You rolled your eyes, "I'm sorry, really. But you have a German right there, and an Austrian. How is an accent indicative of anything? Especially now?" You looked around. Surely, they knew all about double agents, especially those like you. "So you're trying to say you're just some kid wandering around with all these guns and knives," Omar held up your pack with all the evidence, "And you expect us to believe you?" "Pretty much." You shifted a little to sit with your legs crossed beneath you, though your hands were still cuffed. You understood their lack of trust...but also...you were a bit more than annoyed now. "I wasn't alone the whole time." You relented. They were with the OSS, and definitely not traitors. What harm would it do to tell them? It may just save your life, after all. "I was part of a team. We were called the Double Eight." Aldo didn't hesitate, "Never heard of it." He turned, almost smirking, "You boys heard of it?" A chorus of 'no sirs' and laughs rang out, and you rolled your eyes, "Of course not. Some of us are better at being undercover than others." An uncomfortable silence blanketed them, and you sighed and went on, "There were eight of us. All of us double agents, double crossers," you smiled fondly remembering your teammates, "Double trouble... Best of the best in what we did, worst of the worst to the nazis, recruited by an American officer working for the OSS." Aldo narrowed his eyes. "Oh really?" "Really." You held your ground, and held your head up high. You heard one of the boys, Smitty, ask Donny, "You think it's true?" Donny then turned to you, "Who was in your team?" He often prided himself for knowing things about agents stationed around Europe, people in resistances, and allies. He was a bit of a networking king...so if any of the basterds could tell, it was him. "A Jewish girl from Poland. Halina..." You smiled softly, though your heart broke for her. You were the one who helped her family escape...but you couldn't help her in your last mission. "She could make and break any code." "And there was Andrej. Big, tough Andrej," You shook your head remembering his loud, bellowing laugh, "Jewish kid, no older than you." You gestured to Hirschberg, "He was Serbian. He was a good strategist." The mission to recruit him was one of the earliest, (and toughest) because he was so damn stubborn. "Ruslo..." You sighed a little, remembering his kind eyes, "Romani guy. Recruited when we passed through Croatia. Didn't need a map when that boy was around." You shook your head with a gentle smile, "Then there was Konstantin. Writer and intellectual, defected from the Soviet Union. Good spy." You glanced up at, and almost imperceptibly whispered, "Good man." Omar looked around, "Kid's gotta be telling the truth." WIcki frowned a little, "How do you know?" Omar shrugged, "Konstantin is the most soviet-spy sounding name I've ever heard." Donny narrowed his eyes and nodded, "Right. Almost too perfect." Aldo rolled his eyes, "Go on." You smiled a little, remembering the unbreakable bond your team had. One even stronger within it, "We had an Italian rebel, he was an escaped political prisoner. His wife was a Spanish anti-fascist rebel. Marzio and Carmina..." Names that axis troops in the mediterranean were terrified off. You took a breath, "Our leader was an American...if you would believe that." You smirked a little, "Shelby Hellberg. Shell-Hell, we called him." You glanced off into the distance. Toward the east, where your last mission together had been. You sighed, knowing you'd never see them again, no matter how many times you passed through there. "And you." Aldo remarked, hardly believing a word you'd said. "And me." You nodded with a smile. What more could you do? Hirschberg shifted a little, rifle still in hand, "And who's you?" "Y/n L/n." You spoke with a sly shadow of pride in your lips, "After all, every team needs some muscle." Donny looked you over incredulously, "You were the muscle?" You challenged him with a simple smirk, "Why? You wanna test that theory, big guy?" You meant it, Donny was quite a bit taller than you, but you could definitely take him down. You'd taken people bigger than him down before, after all. The basterds didn't realize that just yet. But, Hugo kept his eye on you the entire time, thinking about every word you'd said, and the way you'd said them. He'd run with spies before, he knew their ways and webs. You were unlike any of the agents he'd known before. And still, he thought he'd seen your face somewhere before. And he said so, abruptly, without any explanation. "You look familiar." The way he said it...the way he looked at you was not in an accusing manner. He meant it. You went with your default response. You smiled suavely, thumb and finger sitting square beneath your chin as you remarked, "I just have that kind of face." Hugo nodded, and looked away, though he still kept trying to remember. "So, will you let me go? I do have a mission, you know. I'll be terribly late. Madrid is a long way from here, after all." Donny spoofed, "Nice try, a real agent wouldn't have told us all that." "You asked." You reminded Donny with an eye roll. Donny retorted, "So if a nazi asked, you'd tell 'em too." "No, because THEN IT'S A NAZI." Hirschberg piped up then, "How do you know we're not nazis," as if he really got you. Even Hugo and Wicki rolled their eyes. You rolled your eyes, "Because you're basterds." Aldo seemed amused, and humored the boys, "Says who?" "Says that accent. Sorry, but it's not one many people would strive to imitate." The basterds laughed. It had been so long since someone had gotten away with making fun of his accent. "Besides, everyone knows the Bear Jew. And, everyone knows about Hugo Stiglitz...And the Little Man." Donny chuckled, "Wait, who's the Little Man." "Oh, it's-" Before you answered, Utivich stepped closer to you, "Is that...blood?" "...Oh right..." You glanced at your side, with a slowly growing red stain. "When did that happen!?" "Just before you happened." you shrugged. Hugo crouched by you, "Were you stabbed?" "Oh... most definitely." You were somehow so blunt, and so stoic. Shock is one hell of a drug. Donny, who was slowly being convinced that you were telling the truth, quickly looked around for a cue, "Why DIDN'T YOU SAY SO?!" Before you could answer, Hugo practically flung toward you with a medic kit in his hands. He didn't say a word, but he kept looking up at you. He looked you in the eyes, and it wasn't something he normally did with anyone. You couldn't shake the feeling that he was trying to see into your eyes...almost as though he was trying to dig up a memory that was not his own. The basterds went about with their day. Aldo sent a few of the boys along with a message asking the general if the OSS could confirm or deny your claims. In the meantime, the rest of the basterds scattered around. A few went to get supplies and food, some of the others went out to gather a few scalps here and there to pay off their debt to Aldo. Only Hugo remained, of course 'to keep watch.' But he was busy disinfecting and stitching your wound. "Wer hat dir das angetan?" 'Who did this to you?' "Würden Sie mir glauben, wenn ich es Ihnen sagen würde?" 'Would you believe me if I told you?' He smiled a little, which you heard never happened. You raised your eyebrow, 'Why are you helping me, Hugo?' 'If you're not who you say you are, then we need answers. But if you are you, then...' He trailed off into what was barely a whisper, and glanced up at you. By now, he hardly thought you were a nazi... But that still left him with a thousand questions. Number one being...Who were you, really? The basterds came back, slept in their tents. You were still handcuffed, left outside. In the middle of the night, Hugo's eyes shot wide. He had been dreaming, which was relatively rare for him, even before the war. But this dream was much more of a memory. He'd never been much of a sports fan, but there was one night, just before the start of the war his friend Klaus had recently become a manager and promoter in boxing, and invited Hugo to a match. Your match. He made his way outside, and found you, with your cuffed hands behind your head as you laid on your back, and looked up to the sky. You glanced over at the approaching figure, then back at the sky. He stopped a few feet away from you, "Du warst ein Boxer." 'You were a boxer.' You dismisively hummed. He was silent for a moment, then stepped a little closer, tilting his head, 'I remember you. You used to-' You shook your head.

He crouched by you, and took your hands abruptly. You looked at him, confused though....you certainly didn't mind. Still, he wasn't holding your hands for the hell of it. He was studying the discolored memories of a glorious past in every scar from every victory, loss, and draw. 'It was you.' 'Was.' You conceded with a sigh, 'A long time ago.' 'Do you remember a promoter named Klaus?' He sat down, and wondered aloud, 'I wonder where he is these days...' You cleared your throat, ' Oh...you know....we...um...' 'Had a falling out?' He raised his eyebrow and chuckled a little. It was his way of asking if you'd had a falling in. You blushed a little with a smile, 'Well, yes...but it was so long ago.' Hugo was silent for a while, then asked, 'Is he...' 'Dead, deadweight, or a nazi?' He nodded once, again raising his eyebrow. He wanted the answer to all three. 'No, no, and definitely not. He's a spy for the OSS, too.' You smiled at Hugo, who seemed relieved. He didn't have many friends to begin with before the war. He always wondered what he'd do if he made it to the end. 'I'd like to see him again. I owe him something.' Hugo said with a chuckle. He'd bet Klaus that you'd lose your match...and you didn't. 'After the war, perhaps.' You chuckled and Hugo nodded, 'Perhaps...' You were quiet again, then he commented, 'I saw you sparring, once.' 'Congratulations,' you stopped smiling suddenly, and turned away from him as much as you could, 'good night.'

'Wait.' He shifted to sit directly in front of you. 'What?' 'You...disappeated.' 'They used footage from my matches as propaganda against my will. I left the ring, I left my family, I left Klaus, I ditched my contract, and I lost everything.' 'Where did you go?' 'Doesn't matter.' 'What did you do?' 'What are you, the gestapo?' You rolled your eyes at his sudden interrogation, and he grunted at himself and mumbled, 'Sorry..' He started getting up, thinking perhaps he had crossed a line. You sighed, cursed at yourself wordlessly, and then called out 'I worked as a bouncer in a club in Munich. Nice place. Nicer when we started hiding people where no one would think to look. I got rid of nazis that were too close.' 'Not bad,' He smirked a little. You didn't. 'It wasn't enough.' 'So what did you do? You were recruited, weren't you?' 'Same as you.' You smiled a little then, and he did too. For once in his life, Hugo's hands felt warm... He looked down, and saw he was still holding your hands. You didn't seem to mind. He let go suddenly, and uncuffed you. 'You're not a nazi.' 'Oh gee thanks,' You chuckled a little as you crossed your legs beneath you. He mumbled again, 'Sorry...' You smiled and shook your head, reaching for his hand, 'We can never be too careful, I suppose.' 'I suppose not,' He sighed, and his eyes wandered as he sat back against a tree. 'You're not going to sleep?' You smirked, and again said, 'We can never be too careful...' Of course, you meant you didn't want the other basterds to catch you without your handcuffs, and for Hugo to be in some trouble, Hugo thought you meant the fact that you were deep in enemy territory that was the trouble, 'It's safe here,' He promised you with his eyes, a slight nod, and a squeeze of his hand. 'We thought that not too many years ago, Hugo...' You sighed, remembering the day before the world turned upside down in 1933...you were just a kid then. Hugo turned to you, 'You're hurt.' 'You knew that already.' 'But you're hurting...' 'Who isn't, these days?' You laughed a little, but he didn't. 'Let me see.' 'Fine.' He shook his head as he let go of your hand, and went for the medic kit again. As he took care of you and your wound again, he asked 'What happened to your team?' The sky was a cool dark blue, with a tinge of orange in the horizon. It would be sunrise soon... 'It was just before dawn, about a year ago. We were ambushed. From then on, I've been on my own.' 'I'm sorry.'

You didn't tell Hugo that the nazis weren't looking for your team. They were looking for the Basterds, who had just broken Hugo out of prison. 'Don't be...' You looked up at him, and for a moment, you realized you'd had enough talk of the past. 'Where will you go?' 'What do you mean?' 'After this. After the war.' He smiled, 'I don't know...The world is a big place.' He smiled and looked at you, and you understood he didn't want to go back to Germany either. 'Where will you go?' You shrugged, 'Wherever I'm needed, as always.' For reasons neither you or HUgo could comprehend, he murmured, 'What if I needed you?' You kissed him softly, 'Then I'll be there.' **** "Well....that checks out." Aldo held up a letter from the general, demanding they let you go immediately, while also chewing Aldo out. Donny shrugged, "Well, we're sorry kid..."

You laughed, "I know, I know." You glanced over at Hugo, "Can't be too careful these days." Hugo smiled, though the basterds didn't see. You turned, and started walking west, deeper into the forest. "You're leaving? Just like that?" Omar was asking what half the basterds were wondering. "I told you, I have a mission in Madrid...and I've been set back a few days." Hugo shook his head, "But you're hurt!"

You smiled softly, as you stepped back toward him. "I'll be fine," your hand grazed over his for a moment, "You'll see." He smiled quietly as he watched you go, then Hirschberg gasped, "Is Hugo smiling?!" "No." Omar rolled his eyes, "Great you ruined it." Smitty shook his head, "I didn't even get to see." Wicki asked, "Did Y/n ever say who the nazis call the Little Man?" Smitty shrugged, "Huh...guess we'll never know."

***Months Later Aldo was pacing around. They'd recently lost Andy, Simon, and Michael. Now, the basterds needed some extra firepower, and had nowhere to turn to. At dawn, they'd be moving toward a nearby village for their mission. Hugo was looking east, as the first splash of red and orange began to glow in the distant horizon. "What are you lookin' for, Hugo?" Aldo turned, taking a sip of watered down, stale, coffee. They then all heard footsteps. Boots over fallen leaves. A face peered through some low hanging branches, glad to have stumbled upon them. "Y/n!" The basterds had never seen Hugo run so fast. And they were even more shocked when they saw him wrap his hands around yours. "Klaus lässt grüßen, mein Lieber." 'Klaus sends his regards, my dear.'

Hugo smiled, and held you. You'd heard quite a few rumors in the past few months about the basterds. And seeing their faces now... Seeing Hugo... You knew where you were needed.

#Inglourious Basterds #inglourious basterds imagine #hugo stiglitz #hugo stiglitz x reader #hugo stiglitz imagine

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gamerwoo · 4 years

Text

Seventeen headcanon: Seventeen as mall workers

a/n: I’ve always lowkey wanted to do some sort of mall series but never actually had a solid plot so we gonna just do this instead. and Pentagon will be mentioned bc I wanna do one for them and I want them all to work in the same mall and no one can stop me 😤

Choi Seungcheol

currently works at GameStop

he quit his job at GNC a few months ago because he decided he hates working out

while he hates having to restock things or go into the back for stuff, he at least likes video games

definitely not the dude you want to end up yelling at on the phone

there have been so many times he’s had to give the phone off to Wonwoo or another co-worker because he would definitely lose his job

too high of a temper to work at GameStop tbh

but he knows what he’s talking about, so

has definitely recommended you games even before he worked in there

you’d just happen to be in there when he was and he’d notice you looking between two games and he’d tell you which one was better suited for you after asking what you normally play/what you like

now that he works there, he always puts in his two cents and will give you his discount on top of your own

Yoon Jeonghan

the current manager at Starbucks

he used to be the manager at American Eagle but he hated working there because retail sucks

unfortunately, the only other job he could snag was in -- you guessed it -- still retail

but at least he gets yelled at slightly less in Starbucks

and it’s probably only because he makes everyone else do things for him so he doesn’t have to

will take his sweet ass time making a drink

refuses to work the register

would rather stay off toward the back and make the drinks than deal with the people

always says he’s too busy to do things because he’s still training Yanan even though Yanan’s worked there longer than Jeonghan has

he’s also slightly salty at Yanan because he might be the better looking barista

one time he asked you if him or Yanan was cuter and you said him so he gave you your drink for free

refers to you as his “favorite customer”

Joshua Hong

works at Guitar Center

between him, Jihoon, and Jinho, he probably knows the least about instruments

pretty much only knows guitar things

but all he does is sit at the counter and play the guitar and sing

you are literally the only person who likes hearing him sing Sunday Morning

Jihoon told him to stop before he smashed the guitar over his head but you were in the store to kill time before your break ended and you said you were enjoying it

so Josh smirked and continued while Jihoon rolled his eyes

“’customer’s always right’ my ass...”

whenever you come in or he sees you walk by he’ll be like “got any requests?”

has offered to give you guitar lessons but you're always busy with work so you say “maybe another time”

but he continues to ask

Wen Junhui

works at the pet store downstairs

there hasn’t been a single time you’ve gone in there or walked past there and he wasn’t holding an animal in his arms

loves all the animals

also makes animal noises at the animals but it’s weird because he actually sounds like the animals

notices you come in to play with the animals during your break so now he always tries to get you to bring one home

“it’s not for the business, I just want them to find homes”

once got yelled at for actually getting in one of the puppy pens to play with them

Kwon Soonyoung

currently works at Hot Topic

the only reason being that store could not give less of a hell what goes on

he’s been fired from literally every other place at the mall

got fired from Starbucks for drinking too much coffee and shaking so badly all the time that he would spill drinks

fired from Build-A-Bear for exploding a bear with stuffing and making a child cry

fired from Bath & Body Works for dropping candles and spraying perfume in a customer’s mouth on accident

dropped and broke a guitar at Guitar Center

basically his last hope was Hot Topic but if Wooseok can work there and do absolutely nothing, Soonyoung was safe working there

he does attempt to do his job, it’s just that when it comes to basically existing, he’s bad at it

knocks things over, trips on things, is the loudest thing in the store

but he’s friendly and he does his job so who can complain

Jeon Wonwoo

the manager at GameStop

the youngest one working there but he’s in charge

usually the one to deal with the shitty customers but Wonwoo is thankfully good at containing his anger

well, at least until he hangs up the phone or the person is gone

goes in the back to yell about it to whoever is back there, even if they’re listening or not

Shinwon and Seungcheol give him a hard time for being the manager and always laugh and go “glad we’re not you!”

but he does love his job because he gets to work with video games

lowkey not very good with the girls who ask him for help though

gets blushy and can’t look them in the eyes

actually he’s really shy with people in general so tbh he’s always somewhat flustered

but he’s always feels happy when he helps someone find a new game or something so he likes his job

he’s usually the one who checks you out at the register and he’s the one who signed you up for a rewards card because you were in there so often

you don’t know this but before the rewards card, he would just give you his discount because you were literally always getting games or stuffed animals or pop figures from there

Lee Jihoon

the manager at Guitar Center

again, the youngest at his store, but the one in charge

his assistant manager, Jinho is slightly angry about it

but Jihoon knows everything about everything

any instrument you need fixed or need info on, he’s your guy

he comes off as very serious and not too friendly, but if you make him crack a smile, he suddenly seems super approachable

if he sees you having lunch at the food court when he’s on his break, he joins you sometimes

“you don’t give me a headache”

you assume that’s a compliment

some customers don’t take him seriously because they’re rude and assume he’s “a child”

but of course he schools their asses in his knowledge of instruments, so

sometimes his work is so satisfying lmao

Lee Seokmin

works at Bubble Bee

between him and Kino, it’s no wonder they get a lot of business

they’re both so cute and sweet and smiley

there was a short period of time where Soonyoung worked there and tbh those two were a mess

suddenly they only shared one braincell and poor Kino was stuck cleaning up their messes

but Seokmin and Kino work well together

not to mention Seok looks really adorable in the uniforms

always makes really good bubble tea

likes when the straw color matches the color of the drink though

you’ve never spoken to him much but he’s always smiling and cracking jokes and tbh you’re soft for him

Kim Mingyu

he was hired at GNC like, a month ago

he used to work at Starbucks but he got fired

because even though he made good coffee, the poor big idiot is clumsy as hell and kept spilling things and dropping things and knocking things over

Hongseok and Matthew knew him sorta so Matthew decided to hire him

he doesn’t really know what he’s doing but it’s fine

Hongseok’s training him while Matthew does most of the work since he’s manager

people started calling them the Big Tiddy Committee which you think is kinda funny

he’s usually in there when you go in to hang out with Hongseok and he’s really sweet

a lil dumb, but sweet

Xu Minghao

works at Lush

he originally planned to work at Sephora because he’s good with like, fashion and stuff

but he didn’t feel like dealing with that and Lush seemed less...annoying

he does seem kinda quiet and a little cold at first because he doesn’t really smile a whole lot except when politely greeting someone

but it’s easy to make him laugh

and he has a cute laugh and a really pretty smile

so when you first went in there to get a bath bomb and he asked if you needed help, you were really tempted to just say you were just looking

but you let him help and you got to talking and Minghao was really sweet

sometimes he has lunch with you, too because you just like talking to him

you found out he’s friends with Jun from the pet store and Yanan from Starbucks

it seems like a weird group of friends but hey, you also thought Minghao was a lot colder than he turned out to be

he always texts you when your favorite items are in stock and he may or may not use his discount and set them aside for you to pick up

“cash app me later it’s fine”

Boo Seungkwan

works at Sephora

he really wants to do makeovers but he’s not allowed to lmao

mostly just works the register and like lowkey judges everyone’s makeup

he will hype the hell out of you if he thinks you did something well

“your eyeliner is insanely sharp, oh my god”

“your eye shadow is beautiful!”

“that lipstick color looks so good with your skin tone”

has no frickin idea what to do with his discount because he doesn’t wear makeup

you once went in there and asked him for help and he just blinked at you and went “okay, let me find someone who knows what they’re doing”

at least he’s honest

Chwe Hansol

works at FYE

makes playlists to play at work in the store

literally just always vibing

the chillest worker in the entire mall tbh

one time he helped his manager, Hui make you a mixtape because you were looking for new music

so then he got interested and started talking to you as well about music

at this point, you’re going to befriend the whole store

looks like he doesn’t do much because he’s usually sitting at the counter and vibing

but he loves helping out customers and picking out music for them or fining things for them

he just loves to help out and talk about music

Lee Chan

works at American Eagle

when you see him in those jeans, you get it

he’s like a walking billboard because damn he looks r e a l n i c e

usually working the sales floor so folding and getting things from the back if someone can’t find a size

doesn’t work the register too often

so whenever you go in, he’s usually who greets you at the door with his beautiful smile

honestly he just looks like he should be working at that kind of store y’know? he fits

he doesn’t mind the job even though Jeonghan couldn’t stand it

despite that, he still is human and understand that shit is expensive

and since he recognizes you as a fellow mall worker, he sometimes goes up to the store you work at and let’s you know when they’re having special sales and stuff

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jiminies-ahmee · 4 years

Text

a headcanon series: movie nights w bf!bts

member: jeon jungkook <3

member:

location really depends on the time and situation...

but honestly speaking, kook likes to have your monthly movie nights at your place

and yes, they're monthly bc there's absolutely no way he can fit in a weekly session w his packed schedule

and you're a busy bee too, you're never not on that grind

anyway, the reason why kook likes to have them at your place is bc he likes seeing you just... in your ‘comfy zone’ as he likes to call it

like its your place so ofc you're gonna be totally fine doing your own thing

when you go over to the apartment building, usually a few if not all the boys are there and it gets a little... too much sometimes with how rowdy they get

so yeah, in short he likes your place

he’ll always pick up some snacks before going over to yours, and he never fails to bring your favourites

sometimes he goes the extra mile and orders takeout/pizza to be delivered to your place if he knows you haven't eaten yet

he gotta make sure his baby fed

just like you do the same for him

and when he arrives he always makes ya damn heart stop for a minute

he looks so cuddly and warm skkskss

usually dressed in some sweats and a jumper that's oversized even on him

swallows him up a lil lmao

and he’s got his hood up w his messy hair poking out of it too ugh

and you just pull him into your apartment and shut the door so you can hug him as tight as you can w/o the neighbours staring

bc that's happened before and even though it was funny for kook it was not for you

but anyways

he’ll do that lil giggle he does and ask how your day was (even tho he asked over text a few hours ago)

so u tell him all about what went down during the day and how you had to deal with some bad n annoying things at work

but knowing that you'd get to see him at the end of the day kept you in high spirits

he’d blush

like literally b l u s h

and your heart would go ‘poof’

“you’re too sweet baby” <3

and then kook would follow u into the kitchen to help u out w the snacks

but who's the real snack here doe

he’s got the popcorn, you’ve got the pizza he picked up on the way

and y'all settle on the couch

kook isn't bothered w what u watch

but he is a big fan of romcoms

n he open his arms for u to settle against his chest

and sometimes he’ll just pop a kiss to your head whilst watching the movie

and feeds u a piece of popcorn

all whiles his eyes are on the tv

like he doesn't even have to look @ u

or sometimes u sit on opposite ends of the couch

and a popcorn eating competition begins

like u take turns throwing a piece at one another and the other has to catch it w their mouth

there have been several occasions on which one of you has choked on a piece

yeah, wasn't fun

but kook puts a lot of effort into it

and then he ends up tiring himself out

so by the time the credits of the movie are rolling

kook is resting his head on your chest

and is fast a s l e e p

n u ruffle his hair

n give him a lil kiss goodnight

#jeon jungkook #jungkook #jungkook blurbs #jungkook fluff #jungkook scenarios #jungkook imagines #jungkook headcanons #bts #bts blurbs #bts scenarios #bts imagines #bts fluff #bts headcanons

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britishchick09 · 3 years

Text

help! livewatch

to kick off my beatleversary, we’re taking a look at my fellow beatle fan (aka my dad)’s fave movie from the lads... help! i’ve only seen 15 minutes of ‘a hard day’s night’ because it was a bit boring and ‘yellow submarine’ was fantastic, so i hope this falls right in between. let’s go get some help!

...why are we back to the end of return of the jedi?

sacrifice WHAT’S HAPPENING

OMG the sacrificial ring!!! :o

wait does ringo have it?

people: “ring ring ring ring!!!” john in ob-la-di-ob-da-da anthology: “a ring!”

and it goes right into ‘help!’ clever one lads ;)

the movie is in color yet this is in black and white like it’s on tv. coolio! :D

‘help’ is a bop! :D

you’d think the credits would play over them but nope :/

eyyy called it! :D

CALLED IT AGAIN!!!!!!

♫ won’t you pleeeeeease please

me!!! :D

this guy keeps throwing darts on the screen and it’s so weird:

OMG lester like phil lester???? ;o

tribe chief: “we need to find the ring!” guy: “has nobody looked in the washbasin?” lol :D

so the guy is only finding the ring for himself and not the tribe?

cool they live at 221b! :D

lady: “still the same they was before they was!” grammar much?

pretty house! :D

JOHN YOU SNEAKY LIL BISH

he’s reading it in a hole how nice :)

george is using fake teeth to mow a lawn inside their house how epic :D

and paul is playing the organ! :D

ringo: “me finger’s stuck in the door” no rongles it’s “I HAVE THE DOOR IN ME FINGERS!!!!’

OMG RINGO SCREAM LET GO LADY!!!!!

also his hair is a hot mess

john: “that’s immature of you, son” says you

ringo thought the lady thought his fingie was a sandwhich lol :D

ooh light :o

NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! :o

ringo just fell off the bed lol :D

john sleeps in the hole lol :D

why does john have a phone in the hole lol

he’s calling george and paul who are in the other rooms WHY CAN’T YOU JUST TALK TO THEM

and all he did was say ‘hello’ JOHN YOU DORK

the guy pronounced beatle ‘bee-ah-tle’ lol :D

guy: “they all look the same!” me before a year ago today

yo like harrods the store? :o

they keep saying ‘shilling’ why

ooh title!

groovy!

ringo to john: “what was it that first attracted you to me?” WOAH LENNSTARR???? john: “you’re very polite aren’t you?” yes that’s true thanks for not making it sarcastic :)

OMG MAGNETS!!!

john: “ah HA HA!!!!” op there’s the sarcastic bish!

two lads walking 0.2 feet apart in a 2 BECAUSE THEY’RE NOT BI!!!!

why are ringo and john saying the same things at the same time chaotic lads!

john: “what’s the matter?” ringo: “oh there’s no matter. OW OW OWWW!!!!” i think there’s a matter....

‘65 beatle girls: *swoon!!*

also don’t tell the lady she sucked up the wrong hand...

WELL THAT ESCALATED FAST

george keeps going ‘oh ho ho ho!!!” and i love it :D

they’re playing ‘you’re gonna lose that girl!’ :D

and it goes from not as clear film audio to clear recording audio which is weird

cool shot! :D (and beatle girls probably thought this was so hot)

ringo cig WHY

they have to do it again WHY IT WAS PERFECT

awww ringo’s dancing a bit :)

OMG :o

john: “you naughty boy!” don’t say that plz why :/

OMG THIS GUY’S GONNA CHAINSHAW WINGO :(((((

lady: “please flee!!!” ringo: “ok” lol :D

indian music! (you think this is how george started liking it?)

they’re seeking enlightenment! :D

ringo: “does this ring mean anything from you?” british guy: “freemason?” senpai wants your number

george is asking everyone if the blood rushes to them lol :D

OMG SOMEONE’S KILLING EVERYONE

guy: “could you pick this up for me please?” *knocks the chef out rapunzel style* lol :D

awww the lady wants to save ringo!

lady: “that’s the sacred ring!” paul: “say no more!” lady: “i can say no more!” lol :D

awww ringo is john’s best friend :)

oh no they have until 5 until a new victim is closing! :o

why is there a ticket in the soup

ringo: “that’s a season ticket!” john: “i love me a good seasoning” *puts it back in his soup* lol :D

ringo: “i got it from this eastern bird... lady” ;)

ringo can’t take the ring off!

george *about his soup*: “there’s footprints in here!” wut

THINGS ESCALATE SO QUICKLY IN THIS MOVIE!!!!

jeweler: “some problems are matrimonial” john: “eh heh heh” ;)

john wtf

the ring can’t be cut and it’s breaking the tools like rapunzel’s hair! :o

john: “you’re a failure, aren’t you scientist?” shut up plz

scientist: “voltage, up, up!” paul: “up up up up!!!” awww :)

scientist: “made in america you see!” john: “this is english” lol :D

john: “how do you feel?” ringo: “i used to use me hands” john: “he used to use his hands” lol :D

OMG I REMEMBER SEEING THAT WHEN I WAS A BABY FAN!!!!!

paulie likes it ;)

oh no the lady has a gun!! :o

the ‘brain drain’!

beatle logic: sing a song back home ALTHOUGH THEY SHOULD PROBABLY BE TAKING CARE OF THIS SERIOUS RING PROBLEM????

it’s ‘you’ve got to hide your love away’ so that’s cool :D

she’s not impressed :/ (but i am!)

john said the lady had ‘filthy eastern ways’ SHUT UP JAWN >:(

the lady wants ringo to shrink his fingo! :o

wait what

ooh intermission! :D

this is so random lol :D

PART 2 WAS JUST A LADY WASHING SOMEONE WTF WHY

that was random af and very family guy!

ringo’s allergic to penicillin like my mom! :D

OMG THE BAD GUYS ARE ATTACKING!!!!!!

my fave show! :D

JOHN IS ATTACKING IN THE HOLE ATTACK IN THE HOLE!!!!!

aww finger guns! :D

ringo’s crying at his suit having red all over :(

WHY IS THIS FIGHT SO CHAOTIC

ringo: “how can i get the ring off with me hands held up?” lol :D

ringo has a voice crack when he said ‘look!” :D

JOHN GON KILL U!!!!

john’s ‘get out’ is so good omg :D

oh no the scientists really want the ring now! :o

they’re in the snow for ‘ticket to ride’!!! :D

me lol :D

what a giffable shot! :D

ooh music notes! :D

penny lane much? ;)

oh no the guys are watching them... ;)

the lads are saying ‘oh ho ho ho’ WHAT HIGH DORKS

OMG RINGO!!!!!!

he says ‘ouch ouch ouch’ when rolling down the snow lol :D

*OH HO HOS INTENSIFY*

evil snowman... >:)

the bad guys have a curling bomb and one of them keeps saying everything he does lol :D

george: “hey it’s thingie! a fiendish thingie!!” lol :D

guy: “useless! what rubbish!” *THINGIE BLOWS UP A SECOND LATER* lol :D

snowman battle! :o

guy: “in the name of kindness, stop! stop!” the lads: *don’t stop*

HOLY FRICK THEY’RE BEING FLAMETHROWERED

paul running into john at the train station... ;)

ooh sherlock holmes reference!!!!!! :D

ringo: “they have a different religion... i think” lol :D

the scotland guy is mimicking ringo and ringo’s not impressed lol :D

why are the bad guys playing indian music in the phone booth WE KNOW WHO YOU ARE

999 is 911! :D

OMG IT’S MY FAVE HELP SONG ‘I NEED YOU’!!!!! :D

wowza editing in person! :o

paperback writer much? ;)

‘she’s a woman’ from past masters is playing on a walkie talkie! :D

the chief thinks it’s shocking and hates it lol

chief: “take this hastily scribbled note hastily!” lol :D

motorcycle go brrrr

guy: “they shall not pass!” gandolf who

‘the night before is playing!!!! :D

what a cool shot!

‘she’s a woman’ interrupted it no!!!! :/

OMG TNT

good ‘night before’ is back! :D

the lip syncing was kinda off tho

the bad guys are in camoflage and it’s like we’re in ww1!

the song ends ON A BIG AF EXPLOSION WTF

OMG THEY’RE USING MACHINE GUNS THIS IS SERIOUSLY WW1 NOW TH FRICK

i came here to watch beatles NOT THE WAR

oh no john fell! :o

ringo: “get up johnny! get up for me, baby!” lennstarr tho ;)

so many explosions I DID NOT SIGN UP FOR THIS

guy: “MISSED you naughty boys!!!” ...plz dont call them that :/

victory music is playing did the bad guys win???

wtf is going on THIS ISN’T THE GREAT WAR IT’S THE HELP! WAR

buckingham??? :0

i swear if john is in nothing but a sheet-

not your lockie’s palace ;)

ringo: “IT APPEARS i need one card. IT APPEARS i need to chuck one in” IT APPEARS that you need to emphasize that for some reason...

them playing cards is so domestic :)

ringo: “i don’t just use my drumstick for drummin’” paul: “well what else is it for?” ringo: “i use it!” OH GOD WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT RONGLES

john: “we’re risking our lives for the most useless member!” is that fingo or ringo

ringo: “let that be an end to it, END TO IT” same ringo

omg the palace is haunted! :o

OMG QUEEN REFERENCE???

OMG SOMEONE’S SHOOTING

the guards are tripping over each other!

the scientists are the guards!!!! :o

they made time slow down! :o

someone sprayed that red paint and the lads yeeted out of there! :o

they’re in a bar DRINK DRINK DRINK EVERYBOOODY!!!!”

paul to ringo: “you’re a rat underneath aren’t you?” OHHHHH ROASTED!!!!!

paul used to wink at paul... mcharrison has sailed! :D

OMG TIGER ROAR WHAT

ringo’s alone with it no! :o

thanks for the clarification?

lady to ringo: “don’t move!” ringo to ‘a tiger’: “don’t move, that’s what she said!” lol :D

why is she whistling the 9th symphony

they’re all singing it to make the tiger calm and ringo’s like “ok!!”

A WHOLE CROWD IS SINGING IT WHAT

this is legit abbey road! :o

ooh bahamas!

i love how george is taking pics of everything :D

i didn’t think cameras sounded like static back then tho...

oh no THE CHIEF IS THERE TOO!!!!! :o

BOI WHY DID HE SLAP A GUY

no the scientist is there too! :o

prepare for the beatle bahamas battle lads...

idk what pc is but they all the soldiers all named that

ooh ‘another girl’! :D

i heard it was cold when the lads filmed the movie so rip to their arms :/

CAKE

so much purple! :o

hey john! :D

george: “let’s play a game it’s called peep peep peep peep-“ yup THEY SO INCREDIBLY HIIIGHHHH

THEY’RE SAYING ‘OH HO HO HO’ AGAIN WHY

the lady said ringo’s getting ‘disembowled’ and john’s like “keeps ye busy eh?” like the lil’ bish he is

ringo: “i don’t want to knock anyone’s religion but-” *runs away*

bike lads! :D

they keep saying ‘let’s go back and get ‘em!” yep they hiiiigh

a triumphant one of ‘i’m so happy to dance with you’ is playing!! :D

OMG ONE OF THE BAD GUYS IS SKYDIVING

wtf bro

paul’s explaining things cryptically and george is like ‘why tho’

paul: “there’s the temple and that swimming pool and... i’m lost” lol :D

ringo: “read on” B)

OMG ISSA TRAP!!!!

george: “typical!” lol :D

WHAT DOES ‘KAILI’ MEAN

RINGO GO UNDER!!

omg he’s in the orange blanket! :o

ringo: “HEEEEELP!!! help me!!!” title drop roll credits! :D

dere he is! :D

i remember seeing that before i was a fan and thinking it wasn’t beatles lol

john: “he’s got a plan” paul: “a really famous plan!” john: “a plan superintendent...” superintendent: “you see i’ve got a plan!” ...i think he has a plan

OMG ‘HARD DAY’S NIGHT’ IS PLAYING SO TRIUMPHANTLY

the plan is baseball?

#spon

smoooosh

everyone’s calling for ringo and george is beating his chest lol :D

THE SCIENTISTS GOT WINGO NOOOOOO

scientist: “dust in the generator. gets everywhere” and it’s rough & coarse too...

the lady is saving ringo!

the scientist doesn’t need the ring now that he has...’nobel prize juice’?”

they keep saying ‘eastern’ as the language.... :/

ringo: “i can’t swim!” lady: “what do you mean you can’t swim?” he means HE CAN’T SWIM LADY!!!!

oh no THE SACRIFICE!!!!

the sacrifice involves a horrible, inaccessible name... voldemort?

he’s free!!!! :D

ringo: “i don’t subscribe to your religion!” lol :D

‘help’ is playing again! :D

and the chief has the ring now... >:)

...what does that have to do with anything tho

and with the trippy credits came the end of the movie! the only help i’ll be needing is why it was more weird than yellow sub but i had such a fun time with it (especially the snow scene and ‘i need you’)! what a great movie! :D

#livewatch #if there's one word to describe this it's not 'help!' it's 'chaotic!'#especially since i lost 30 minutes of commentary when tumblr glitched out #still a great movie! :D

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daybreakdarling · 5 years

Text

Rattlesnakes and Peacekeepers (McCree x Reader)

Word Count: 6.2k+ Trigger warnings: Snakes, minor violence Crossposted on: Ao3

- - - - -

Not a lot happened within Route 66. While it still was a tourist attraction, every ring loses its shine after a while. There were the curious tourists that come for the vast canyon views, locals that lazed under the humid air, and rowdy biker groups that liked to cause minor inconveniences, but unless unless you had a knack for the oddly-shaped cacti or dirt-tasting coffee, nothing particularly interesting would be seen in it.

If something did happen, it’s usually just out of it.

Just by the borders of the main area, almost close to the next road, was a shooting range. One hectare of field boxed by metal fencing with a farm on the east and a house just by the left of it. It had been managed by a nice family of five. It had what you needed: If you wanted to shoot, you line up cans and bottles. If you wanted a break, the family had drinks ready on the porch. If you needed a place to stay, rooms were offered at reasonable prices.

The only rule: always shoot something, never someone.

It used to be the joy of those two lived between the counties; anyone who came by at least once would always agree that it was a gem in the land—a getaway for the good, bad, and anyone in between. The family didn’t ask for a lot either, just good company, and the people were happy to oblige to such good hospitality.

However, after a raid by a gang from the neighboring state, the place was unsalvageable. The family moved out, and the joy with them. No one bothered to take care of it either; it wouldn’t be the same. From there, it was left to collect dust.

That was twenty years ago.

McCree was staying in New Mexico for a few days. It was that time of the year where a number of agents were heading back to their hometowns, and since he hadn’t been called for any missions for a while, he decided to do the same. Soldier was a little skeptical to have him visit due to a possible run in with his old gang, but Ana was quick to allow McCree with the reassurance that it would be good for him.

So there he was, on the last day of his short break, standing under the canopy of the abandoned farmhouse.

He visited the range a lot with his parents when he was younger. McCree spent long afternoons practicing with his father while his mother talked with the family. Even after he joined Deadlock, a number of the gang members, himself included, visited the range just to enjoy a place where everyone was viewed the same. He had a lot of good memories associated with it, so when the news of the attack went across New Mexico, it was an understatement to say that he was devastated.

He leaned on the porch fence, careful not to put too much weight and cause more damage. If the buildings creaked just by the desert wind, what more by him?

Looking around, the field’s grasses were tall and unkept, and the barrels, boxes, and fences used for the shooting range across the land were old and withered. The place definitely saw better days, but it was just as he remembered it.

A number of bottles were on the fences, so McCree raised Peacekeeper for a casual shot.

Kling!

…

That wasn’t his bullet.

McCree looked to the direction of the shot to see an officer. You were dressed in casual attire: a tan blouse, greyish-green tactical pants, and brown hiking boots. On your head was a cowboy hat like McCree’s, but the brown had already withered into a lighter shade and your hat band was a white weaved braid. You were far from him, but the only thing that gave McCree the idea of your position was the shining star lapel on the left of your shirt, and a mean-looking revolver.

The cowboy took a shot to the can next to yours.

McCree was quick to raise his hands up when you point your gun at him.

“I don’t mean t’cause any harm!” McCree called out. Even in the long distance, anyone in Route 66 could easily shoot a man between the eyes (example: himself).

McCree hoped that you’ll put down the gun or return to shooting, but you started to advance towards him. The cowboy knew not to mess with the law (he’d done so many times in the past, and that definitely got him somewhere), so he stood on guard; McCree even placed his hat to his chest, hoping that showing respect will keep him from being turned in. He did have a bounty over his head, after all.

“State your name and business,” you demanded.

“The name’s Jesse McCree.”

There’s shock, then a slight shift in your grip. The man’s been on gun point many times like these before, but for some reason your presence just intimidated him more than it should. McCree was quick to speak up.

“Just ‘ere t’enjoy the Miller’s shootin’ range like anyone else, deputy.”

After what felt like an eternity, McCree sighed as you returned your gun to your holster.

You leaned on the porch fence beside him, arms crossed as you looked into the distance. The air wasn’t completely comfortable, but it wasn’t tense. McCree took out a cigar, and he gestured it to you as if to ask if you wanted one. You shook your head, and he proceeded to light it.

“What’s an officer of the law doin’ ‘round the dusty outskirts of Route 66?” he asked, blowing out a puff of smoke.

“Shootin’,” you answered simply.

You gave him a look over.

“What’s an ex-Deadlock gang member turned covert-operative Overwatch agent doin’ round ‘ere?”

McCree choked on the cigar for a second.

“... shootin’.”

Silence passed.

“Well, there’s some more bottles n’ caps by th’ back of th’ house,” you chirped, brushing past him.

“I’ll fetch ‘em for ya. I’d like t’see that infamous aim of yours.”

It takes McCree a moment to register that you just called him out of his affiliations, one of which he was sure would not reach as these parts of the world, and simply dropped the topic as if it was a broken gun. If he didn’t know any better, he would’ve taken for as just a normal officer doing their job, but it was clear that you knew a lot more than you let on.

He whipped around to see you heading to the back of the farm house, and he rushed to get to you.

“Now wait a gosh darn second, how’d you—“

”It’s either we shoot glasses as equals, or I’m interrogating you as an officer of the law,” you cut him off, facing him just as he was about to reach for you.

With eyes narrowed and threatening, McCree could say that he was looking at a snake that was ready to bite. If looks could kill, he’d be dead just by the fierceness in your eyes. As he took in your features, there were a faint scars on your face, light eyebags, and faint wrinkles, no doubt all from your time bringing peace and order as your duty called for it. A thought of how many criminals you have wrangled in your years came to him. You looked only a couple of years older than him, had you encountered Deadlock in the day as well? Did you hear of him from those days? McCree cleared his throat, hand subconsciously reaching for his gun.

You looked at his hand, and at your glance he took hold of the handle.

“Nothing goes past Rattlesnake,” you threatened, hand patting the holster of your gun.

“And if I was on my shift you’d be behind bars by now.”

McCree expected you to pull out some handcuffs—your statement sounded exactly like those catchphrases in shows before a character does something—but when you turned away and knelt down to collect bottles he’s just left to blink.

“But I’m not,” you shrugged.

“Besides, it’d be disrespectful t’go against the one rule on this old range. You know that rule?”

“Shoot something, never someone.”

Getting up with the targets, you shove a number in his arms without warning, making McCree scramble in an attempt to not drop any of the glass-based targets. You explained to him that you’ll find some more by the other side of the house, and then told him to line up the ones you had given him.

“If I’m not back by th’ time you’re done, just go ahead. I might be findin’ somethin’ a lil’ more interestin’ than bottles.”

As you turned away to do your task, McCree thanked the heavens that the rules of the shooting range haven’t changed after all those years.

>>>

Your aim was impressive. As the two of you stood across each other and shot down targets, McCree can’t help but nod approvingly at your shots. When he asked you to shoot six targets off a fence, each one is knocked off clean with a speed that competed with his own. Even when he tries to one up you with tricks like spinning his revolver out before shooting, you do him one better by making twice the amount of spins before taking out targets that were farther than him. McCree knew he was a show off, but you were really rubbing it in.

Not that he minded anyway.

“Haven’t gotten your name, deputy,” McCree called over a shot.

“Can’t keep callin’ ya that now, can I?”

He heard a snort from beside him.

“You can and you will if you want to keep th’ hat from a bullet,” you replied mischievously, flashing him a grin.

McCree placed a hand on his hat protectively, making you holler.

“(Y/N) (L/N). Heard the last name before?” you asked.

“Sorta rings a bell,” he replied.

“Am I supposed t’know?”

You feigned hurt, and McCree rolled his eyes as he reloaded his gun.

“If you’ve ever heard of th’ ‘Desert Venom’ predicament, my father was th’ one who wrangled that rattlesnake. Our family’s known for handlin’ those devils, even got a couple myself,” you boasted, pointing a thumb at yourself for emphasis.

McCree smiled at your confidence.

“I know of those days; just didn’t know it was your Pa that got it,” McCree said, remembering news of a six foot long rattlesnake that went around New Mexico for a couple of months. He was in his teen years when it was taking place, and he was glad that the reptile had been caught before it could reach Santa Fe.

“Is that why your gun’s called Rattlesnake?” he asked.

You shrugged, “Sorta? A good gunsmith buddy of mine made her for me. I didn’t even ask ‘im t’design her like this, but he did, and I loved it.”

“Mind if I take a closer look?”

McCree had actually been eyeing your gun for a while. He didn’t notice it when you had the weapon straight at him, but the gold and silver embossing around the revolver got his attention in the span of your friendly competition. Stolen glances weren’t enough to really see what was on it (especially with you shooting at rapid speed, it was just the gun rolling back and forth and never staying still), but it was already eating at him.

He was half-expecting you to say no to him, since there were unspoken rules about handling fellow gunslingers’ guns, but McCree was shocked when you gestured the gun towards him.

“I’ll let you see her if you show me yours.”

He obliged, handing you Peacekeeper.

“Careful, she bites,” you joked as you watched him gawk over the amount of work on the gun.

The more he analyzed it the more details he found. The rattlesnake started from the frame from the revolver and coiled throughout. Engravings were left out from the cylinder but continued around the barrel, and despite it’s minimalized look it was clear that it was made to look as if the snake was striking with its open mouth aligned with the muzzle. McCree wished he had met your friend to applaud the work because heck, even the scales were insanely realistic to the touch.

“She’s a beauty,” he whistled.

“I have to say the same for yours,” you spoke. McCree watched as you held his gun, the same look of wonder and curiosity on your face.

“Name?”

“Peacekeeper.”

“That’s a lil’ ironic considering your work.”

McCree shrugged.

“You have a gun named after one of th’ most venomous snakes in New Mexico, and you’re an officer of th’ law. I’d say that’s ironic.”

You both shared a laugh.

“Let’s get out of th’ heat,” you offered, lightly tugging him by the serape to lead him back to the house.

Once you both were out of the desert sun and seated on the porch, the two of you shared some stories. McCree happily talked about his life when he still lived in New Mexico, occasionally dabbled into some Deadlock days, and quietly mumbled about Blackwatch events. You asked him some normal questions (“Favorite part of town?”, “Been to the High Side Saloon?”), but of course he expected some rather personal ones (“How did you join Deadlock?”). McCree answered those more-or-less truthfully, but when he only gave you silence you knew better than to test your luck.

“I apologize for prying too much,” you said sheepishly.

“Comes with years of interrogatin’ folks.”

You were a good fellow—McCree admitted to you that he enjoyed your company more than he expected—but he couldn’t get too comfortable with someone he just met. A feeling in his gut told him that maybe, just maybe, he could open up to you more with time.

You, on the other hand, talked freely about your life. Before becoming an officer, you were a bit of a rebel in your youth, wreaking havoc in your mother’s diner and stealing bikes parked around saloons. You were a kid with a dream to live up to your family name, capturing and wrangling dangerous snakes from across the lands. It was endearing to see the passion in your eyes, but then you explained that you had to become a deputy to earn money for your family. Your bright demeanor turned into one of disappointment.

“A trade-off, really,” you said sadly.

“Parents didn’t force me to do it either, but we needed more income. Snake wranglin’ can only give so much, and it really pays when something big is out there, which is rare.”

“What made you become an officer then?”

“Similarities. Instead of takin’ out poisonous snakes, I’m takin’ out poisonous people,” you answered, voice taking a more serious tone.

“See it this way: almost all snakes attack humans out of self defense. We take them out ‘cause we don’t want them t’hurt others, but killin’ doesn’t have t’be the first decision. They’re just out there survivin’. The snakes my family catch are relocated to research centers for antidotes.

“People on the other hand? It depends. If you’re protectin’ yourself, alright, I’m just gonna take a different plan for ya. If you’re savin’ someone, I’ll even help if there’s a more wicked party involved. But if you’re hurtin’ someone for th’ sole purpose of being a dick? I’m not about that. I make sure not to kill the guys, but if push comes to shove then a few bullets will need to hit some areas. They all end up in the county jail under my call.”

“So people are like snakes to you?” McCree asked.

“At the start of the job it looked that way, yeah, but after years under this hat, you learn how to decipher a person with a look or two.”

You hung your head down as your eyes were casted to the sands, a distant look on your face. You were probably thinking of those years, having to bring people behind bars for the crimes and felonies they committed. The contemplation made you look a lot older than you were, and McCree wondered if he looked the same on days where he would be in deep thought such as yourself.

“Is that why you haven’t arrested me yet?”

“You’re an outlaw worth sixty million, McCree, but I know a man with a good heart when I see one,” you said as looked at him straight in the eyes.

“Snakes will shed their skin for the season, and people can leave behind their pasts for the future. I know you’re not the man you once were.”

The two of you became silent.

“The way you reference your advice to snakes is almost unhealthy,” McCree chuckled after a moment.

You were about to retort to his statement until you see the genuine grin on his face.

“But I’ll have you know that all your words mean a lot to me.”

McCree watched as you blinked, clearly not expecting his response. You probably weren’t expecting him to be as understanding to your weird philosophy on life, and judging at how pleased you were, McCree would be more than welcome to listen to you talk a lot more. Your eyes then closed as a meek smile came upon your face, and a soft snort came from you as you mumbled something about him being a dork.

Just as you were about to speak, something started beeping. McCree shot up in his seat in alarm, but he noticed a flashing light from a metal wristband you wore on your left.

You had that the whole time?

“It’s a voice call, they won’t see you,” you assured him, pressing the small light on the metal. Before he could ask who you meant by “they”, a small blue hologram came up with a phone icon and words too small from him to read.

[ CALLING FROM: “THE HITCHING POST” SALOON, AMARILLO, NEW MEXICO ]

“Sheriff (Y/N) (L/N) speaking.”

Wait a minute, you were the sheriff? Not just a deputy?

“Sheriff!” a hurried voice called.

Gunshots were heard, and people were screaming from the other line. At this point you had gotten up, your face scrunched up in worry. McCree could only watch as your fists trembled.

“Officer, what’s goin—”

“It’s the Valley Marauders! T-They’re here again and we thought we could handle—”

CRASH!

“If any of ya shits call the cops on us, you’ve got a bullet waitin’ for ya!” a shrill voice rang before a rapid succession of shots came, all of which slightly muffled from all the sounds coming through.

“They just don’t learn their fuckin’ lesson,” you growled.

McCree held his tongue as he watched you worked quickly, sending a number of different messages and signals with the watch. He noticed as you pulled up one red screen with a striking snake symbol, and immediately swiping it up. From afar he heard a loud engine roar.

“I’ve sent more officers. Be there in five,” you answered through gritted teeth, clearly trying to stay calm for the sake of the victim.

“Please hurry—”

The line went dead.

McCree attempted to speak to you before he saw dust pick from his peripheral vision. He turned to look and there in the distance a driverless motorcycle came speeding down towards the two of you. The vehicle was a shimmering black and silver, it had glowing blue wheels indicating that it ran on a hard light technology, and it ran in a speed that would break all the laws in the world. The main thing however, was how it looked like a striking snake, based on the way the front area had been personalized.

The motorcycle came to an abrupt stop beside you, bringing with it all the dust from its travel. McCree coughed from all the sand, and just as the cloud dispersed, you were sat on the seat with both hands on the handlebars, revving the engine. On the side of the motorcycle were the words “Death Adder”, and if that wasn’t a better name for the bike, he didn’t know what would be. He didn’t think you could look more badass than you were before, but that thought was cast aside as you pulled him and sat him down behind you.

“Hold on to that hat of yours.”

>>>

When you said that you would be there in five minutes, five minutes was really all it took. McCree had passed Amarillo a number of times to know that from the shooting range, it was an approximate fifteen minute ride at the speed limit 70 mph. However, you kicked the gear to 140 mph (or was it higher? He couldn’t remember over ringing in his ears caused by the winds), effectively cutting time and making McCree wonder how people could handle speeds like these. You slowed down once you were within range of the town and parked just outside of it as to not give away your positions.

The area was quiet and deserted. Even the wind was still, making the air feel suffocating with the midday heat of the desert. You and McCree walked through the street, the clicks of his spurs echoing in the silence. When you make a turn, the road opened up to the main road, an open area that stretched to a cliffside closed off by wood fences.

“Just like the movies,” McCree noted.

“You think we’re gonna have a Mexican standoff?”

Just as you were about to joke back, a stout man walked out from an alleyway and stood twenty feet away at the middle of the road opposite of the both of you.

“I was thinkin’ you were never gonna show up, sheriff!” the man grinned, raising dual revolvers up in the air.

“Not I would mind! It’s ‘bout time you ran with your tail between your legs.”

“What do you want, Danford?” you growled.

“That’s Two-Shootin’ Sherrock to you, (L/N),” he hissed.

“Dual-wielding devil! Gang leader of the Valley Marauders! And you best be rememberin’ it when my bullet hits ya!”

“Hey now, since when did anyone give you the permission to make that call?” Mccree said, taking a step forward.

“If anythin’, you’re the one who’s gonna be takin’ a bullet from the sheriff's gun.”

The man’s eyes widened before narrowing, his grin becoming even wider.

“Well,” he dawled, “if it ain’t Jesse McCree.”

“I’m surprised you’re with the sheriff! Aren’cha just as bad as us?”

McCree glanced at you, then back at Danford.

“I’m not bad, not good… but I sure as hell ain’t ugly.”

You tried to keep your smile down, you really did, but the chuckle escaped you. The stout man puffed up in anger, making him appear bigger than he was. Danford brought his fingers to his mouth and made a long shrill whistle. McCree watched as your eyes widened before taking out Rattlesnake, and he took it as a sign to take out Peacekeeper.

“I’m guessin’ that’s bad.”

“No shit, cowboy.”

Footsteps came from multiple directions. McCree’s first guess was that ten men would come out, but after the thirteenth one he was weighing his options as how to go about the situation. Twenty men trapped the both you in a circle. They all stood fifteen feet away from you, and all were armed with a weapon. More than half had their guns at you, but that did little to lessen McCree’s nerves. Peacekeeper only had seven bullets, and even with a quick reload to take out fourteen, their bullets would be shot before he knew it.

“What’re ya gonna do, sheriff?” Danford called from the other side.

You hissed, and McCree had to do a double-take to make sure you actually did that.

“What did you do to the people?”

The gang leader laughed before snapping his fingers.

From his left, two gang members walked out carrying a limp body. McCree watched as you stiffened at the sight: an officer whose face was beaten in, blue, and bleeding. He was alive, but if kept in his current state it didn’t take a genius to know that he wouldn’t last long. You were shaking in rage, and McCree had to take hold of your wrist to keep you grounded.

“This lil’ guy,” Danford gestured, propping the officer’s chin up with the end of his gun. At the sight of discomfort, McCree tightened his grip as you pulled.

“He called you, yeah? Well, we didn’t like that, so we taught ‘im a lesson. And honestly? You gotta get better men! They’re all cozy over by the back of the saloon.”

“Put the gun down!” you yelled.

You lunged forward, but one of the gang members quickly stepped forward and harshly pushed a gun into your temple. You stood still with the barrel pointed straight at you, but no effort was made to move back. McCree gritted his teeth as he pulled you beside him, wrapping an arm by your waist to keep you from at bay... for now.

“How sweet,” the gang member who had pointed the gun at you smiled mockingly.

“Is the outlaw your boyfriend now? How would that look on your reputation, sheriff?”

McCree couldn’t see your expression.

Danford pushed the gun further into the chin of your officer, and at the sight of more pain you struggled under McCree’s grip. He held unto you tighter, not wanting you to get a bullet or twenty into either of you.

“I swear to the all the gods, Jesse,” you murmured just enough from him to hear, “release me.”

“No can do, sheriff,” he replied.

“Bad things come out of people without a plan.”

A face came to McCree’s mind, but the memory was suppressed.

His words were enough to calm you down as your posture slackened. McCree released his hold as you stood straight, looking down at Rattlesnake. Danford barked an order from afar, and all the guns around you were loaded. McCree felt a light jab at his side, and he moved to stay back-to-back with you. You held the brim of your hat before taking it off it completely, a clear sign that you meant business. Before McCree could ask, you pushed your hat into his free hand.

“I didn’t want to use this,” you sighed, grip tightening on your revolver. McCree could feel heat building up from the side where you held your gun.

“At my call, I need you to get down.”

The tone in your voice was similar to when you had threatened him earlier that day, but the malice in your voice was not directed to him. McCree knew that you couldn’t see his nod, but the sentiment was taken as he heard the familiar click of a gun.

“Now!”

BANG!

Silence followed

Your ejector rod clicked the cylinder out, making multiple shell casings hit the ground. McCree peered up to notice a dust cloud clear around him, and he realized that you had done a full 360 turn based on the skids on the dirt. He clutched your hat closer to his chest, and the gunslinger looked beside him to count almost twenty-four empty casings on a pile, not believing that you had shot and loaded quadruple the amount of bullets in your gun.

What in tarnation—

“Argh!”

McCree looked up to see each gang member drop one by one, each clutching to one of their sides. He looked up at you just as you blew the smoke from your gun, and when you looked down at him to give him a small smirk.

“What? Did’ya think that only guys like you had all the flashy shit?”

Once all the bodies hit the ground, McCree handed you your hat as you pulled him up. The leader was shaking. The two gang members who had brought in your officer had fled the scene, leaving Danford to hold up the unconscious man by the scruff of his uniform. He was shaking so much McCree was convinced he’d turn himself in, but when the gun is pointed to the head of the unconscious man, McCree just knew the guy was stubborn.

“Now, y’know I don’t like repeatin’ myself,” you spoke you walked forward. McCree’s gun was pointed straight at the man.

You and McCree backed Danford up to the fence, the wood creaking by the pressure of the man who tried to find an escape route. The cliff was steep slope that curved into a desert meadow with high grasses and rocks. Most gang members would take the opportunity to get down the hill with the assured safety of the grass, but it was obvious that Danford didn’t have the physicality to do so.

“STAY BACK!” Danford yelled, pushing the tip of the gun into a wound, making the officer wince.

McCree sucked in a breath.

“Come on now, Sherrock, no need to get all riled up.”

You and the gang leader looked at him incredulously.

“What?” you seethed.

McCree pointed his gun to you, and you held your hands up. You had no more bullets to shoot.

“Put the man over to the side, and I won’t let the sheriff get t’ ya.”

“McCree, what—”

“Gun down, (L/N).”

Your eyes widened before your expression shifted, and you put your gun back to your holster. He tipped his head down to nod at Danford, and you barely caught the wink he gave you under the brim of his hat.

Sneaky.

Danford wasn’t convinced by McCree’s sudden willingness to help him, so you took the initiative to back away, hands up to prove that you weren’t able to pull anything on him. The man gave McCree a grin, thinking that he had won with the help of a fellow outlaw, then threw the officer to the side. You ran over to him to inspect the wounds; the damage had been done, and he would have to be out of commission for a while.

“Now partner,” Danford said, patting McCree by the shoulder while grinning mockingly at you.

“What do you think we should do ‘bout the deputy? I say we should beat ‘em! It’s two against one!”

The leader was too busy reveling in his “win” that he hasn’t noticed the shift under McCree’s serape. Just as he turned his attention back to him, a flashbang was thrown at him square in the face. You whistled as you watched Danford fall to the ground; it would be an understatement to say that it hurt, judging by the burns to the face. Unfortunately, McCree was barely a few feet away, so he also got the force of the flash.

You ran up to help him, but you weren’t fast enough as he staggered back, lost his footing, and fell on his behind.

“You’re smart,” you said to him with a smile, kneeling beside him to check for any injuries. Besides a slightly singed beard, you handed him a small patch that used biotic technology.

“But reckless. Really reckless.”

“Been livin’ life that way,” he groaned.

“I go with a plan, but I never promise they’d work out perfectly.”

A small beep came from your watch. A hologram was pulled up between you and McCree, and you cursed under your breath. The reinforcements that you had called before your fight had gotten in a scuffle with another gang, and they were just about to reach the scene. While you were glad to get help to rally up the Valley Marauders, McCree would get taken in the moment he would be spotted.

You looked at the fence, and then an idea came.

“Roll off the hill.”

McCree froze just as he was placing the patch you had given him.

“Roll off the hill?” he repeated, looking over the slope.

“Go.”

“Are you shitting me—”

“It’s sloped. Do you trust me?”

McCree slapped his knee with a sarcastic bark, “Don’t you pull that bull—”

“I will kick you off and hope a combat roll is automatic, cowboy,” you commanded.

“Now, do you trust me?”

McCree glanced at you, then at the thirty foot slope awaiting him after the wooden fence.

“… Looks like I got no call in this, sher—”

You swiftly kicked a part of the old fence down, and the wood that rolled off the hill did little to help the situation. McCree is given no time to comprehend what was happened as you grabbed him by his arm, pulled him to the edge, and pushed him.

“Sorry!”

The first two seconds brought more pain to his behind as he hit a few rocks, but McCree willed his body to get into a combat roll as his armor and serape helped against more debris. He skidded down the remaining slope and into the grassy meadow just as he regained balance. Years of being on the run definitely helped, but even then your idea had been uncalled for.

McCree watched as the dust cleared from his trip down the slope. From the top, he could hear the roaring of motorcycle and car engines, boots stomping over the dirt, and your voice barking out orders to deal with what the gang had done. He narrowly missed a few cops that looked over the cliff by rolling into a crevasse of a neighboring hill.

He watched as you stood by the cliff, pointing to the general direction of where he was. For a second, McCree thought you had ratted him out, but after a moment your officers went back to the direction of the town. Just as a few minutes pass, he heard car doors close and the motorcycles speeding away. You still stood by the cliff, and McCree poked his head out just enough for you to see him. With a wave, you skidded down the slope just as he did, albeit a lot more gracefully.

“What’d you tell them?” he asked, walking to you as you dusted yourself off.

“Had them round up the gang,” you explained.

“Apparently someone got word of us meetin’. Told them you got a hit on me and fled.”

“Damn, that’d look good on my resume, wouldn’t it? ‘Escaped the snake sheriff of Amarillo who can can shoot twenty men with a rattlesnake revolver and ride a badass Adder motorcycle’. How the hell did you do that?”

McCree paused as you snorted.

“And you didn’t tell me you were the sheriff! Highest ranking officer of the county! Good lord, where are all your badges?”

At this point you were doubled over, laughing at how McCree was fussing over not addressing you properly—it was cute. He crossed his arms over his chest with a pout, but a small smile came upon his face to see that even after what had happened, you were doing well. You wouldn’t show it, but he was sure that seeing your people in danger had shaken you up.

“About badges, I don’t wear ‘em ‘til I have to. The amount’s too heavy,” you shrugged. To this, McCree sighed.

“And about my shootin’?”

You hummed.

“Let’s just say Rattlesnake doesn’t use normal bullets.”

McCree was about to comment on that line, but he figured that was a whole conversation for another time.

“Now that the fun’s over,” you said, kicking the dirt below you.

“What’re ya gonna do now?”

The realization hit him like a bullet; he was heading back to Gibraltar tomorrow morning. McCree would be picked up by Lena at a town just north of Amarillo, and as much as he wanted to lengthen his stay, he already had a mission waiting for him when he got back. A few days definitely wasn’t enough, but what could he do?

“My trip ends tomorrow, so I gotta pack up,” McCree said, looking down to fiddle with the end of his serape.

“How ‘bout you?”

You pressed your watch, and soon there’s the loud engine of your bike from the distance.

The both of you stood in comfortable silence, neither of you wanting speaking up as you were in each other’s company. When McCree glanced at you, you were looking at him. A faint smile was on your face, but your eyes showed how you felt the same about each other’s departure.

“You’ve done an awful lot for lil ol’ me,” McCree spoke up, tucking his hands into his pockets.

“Like I said, I know a good heart,” you said.

McCree lent out a hand for you to shake, but just as you took it, you pulled him in for a hug. He’s taken aback for a moment, but he eased into the embrace, lingering a little longer than intended.

Now, he really wished he could stay.

“Besides,” you added, pulling away for him to see a grin on your face.

“I also know a good-lookin’ guy when I see one.”

The bike arrived. McCree stood by as you mounted it, subtly mentioning about how he would love to ride it sometime, to which you give him a shrug and a “maybe” to his request. The two of you shared one more laugh together, clearly trying to stall for a bit more time.

"Y'know,” he piped up just as you revved the engine.

“If we knew each other back in th' day, possibly back at th' shootin’ range, I have a good feelin’ that we’d be great partners.”

You tipped your hat at him, and McCree returned the gesture.

“Who says we can’t be?

McCree grinned.

“See ya soon.”

“I’m sure ya will.”

#overwatch x reader #overwatch imagines #overwatch oneshot #overwatch #mccree x reader #mccree #jesse mccree #daybreak.doc

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howtolistentomusic · 4 years

Photo

There's a radio sitting atop a pile of boxes. I grab it and hand it over to Carlos. He sets the device on the edge of the container and pushes the power button. We're greeted with a burst of static. He fiddles with the tuner until he stumbles upon "Wicked" by Future.

"Aw yeah!" he says as he turns the volume way up. "Some real music! Anthony, take notes!"

"I'm insulted by the implication that I don't listen to hip-hop."

"You bump 2Pac between Justin Bieber songs?" David says.

"Hell yeah I do!"

"Guacha!" David says.

Pronounced as if a stressed "ah" sound is added at the end of the English word watch, guacha is a Spanish verb for "look." Informally, though, it means something more like I approve! It's typically complimentary though it often carries a connotation of surprise that can come off as condescending. Against all odds, David basically said to me, I'm impressed. Welcome to the big boys club.

"2Pac is the greatest rapper of all time," Carlos says.

"Well, I don't know about that."

Don't get me wrong. I genuinely do like 2Pac. I grew up in Southern California, after all. But the GOAT? There's no way. He's a compelling figure for many reasons but too many others can rap circles around him.

"Listen to All Eyez On Me," Carlos says.

"Illmatic is better."

"What the fuck is that?"

It's the classic and hugely influential debut album by Nas, in case you're rooming with Carlos and Patrick Star.

"Life's a bitch and then you die!" Ruben sings.

"That's why we get high! 'Cause you never know when you're gonna go!"

"Damn, Ant!" David says. "Who would have thought?"

It's unclear whether he recognizes "Life's a Bitch", Illmatic's track three stunner, or if he's simply surprised that I made a weed reference.

"What else are you bumping?" David asks.

"Wu-Tang. Souls of Mischief. Big L—"

"The Based God?" Carlos says. "He fucking sucks!"

"That's Lil B, dumbass."

Dude doesn't know Big L from Lil B and he's never heard Illmatic. And yet here he is, trying to lecture me about hip-hop. Get the fuck out of here.

"Whatever. You're fucking old," Carlos says.

Touché. But I'm trying to keep up. I'm certainly on the Playboi Carti and Lil Uzi Vert bandwagons. "wokeuplikethis*" and "XO Tour Lif3" are great. I have a hard time understanding the appeal of Migos though.

Carlos grabs some bags from the edge of the container. When he turns to dump them into the proper gaylords, I glance at the radio. It's beckoning like a glowing pickup in a video game. I can't resist. Being cool is overrated anyways.

I tune to Live 105.5. "Good For You" by Selena Gomez is playing.

"Hell yes!" I say.

My coworkers laugh.

"Of course you would listen to this bullshit!" Carlos says.

Bullshit? Ok, I get it. So it's totally cool to want to fuck Selena Gomez. It's totally cool to mime and graphically detail the sexual acts you'd perform on her if given the chance, as a few of the guys did a while back when a Spring Breakers DVD came through the warehouse. Respecting the art she creates, though? Nah. Too much.

"Wanna show you how proud I am to be yours," I sing. "Leave this dress a mess on the floor!"

Two yeas ago one of my favorite music writers, Katherine St. Asaph, wrote some brilliant work inspired by "Good for You". Her Singles Jukebox blurb, in which she rates the song a 9 out of 10, is a masterpiece. And in a review of Revival for Time Magazine, she vividly wrote that the song "makes looking good for her man sound like searing a part of herself dead." Despite such a convincing case for the song's merits, however, I can't bring myself to like "Good For You" all that much. It's boring and rote and I totally prefer "Hands to Myself". In a place like this, though, I'll fucking take it. After all, remaining myself while simultaneously playing "dude" well enough to avoid ostracization by my coworkers is a balance I struggle with every time I step foot into this warehouse, so it feels really good to fill the room with a piece of my world for once while these fuckers are forced to deal with it.

"I just wanna look good for ya, good for ya," I sing. "Uh huh."

"Alright," Carlos says as the song winds down. "It's over."

He tunes the radio back to hip-hop just as Anna screams "Break!"

"Fuck," Carlos says as he turns off the device. ***

As usual, I beat the entire crew back to the dock. I hop into the container, turn on the radio and adjust the station.

"Reck a less bee hayve YA ah!" the radio pronounces.

Zayn Malick! Totally over One Direction, rhyming.

"Turn that shit up!" Donald says as the guys finally find their way back to roll-off. "This is my jam!"

"Let's start a boy band, Donald!" I say.

"I'm down!"

David laughs. Carlos shakes his head.

"I'm seeing the pain, seeing the pleasure," Donald sings. He's not kidding; he genuinely seems to like this song. "Nobody but you, 'body but me, 'body but us, bodies together!"

While I'm thrilled to have a temporary companion in poptimism, I must point out that this song sucks. I wish I could play "Little Black Dress" instead. I wonder what the guys would think of that particular track, which pits a traditional dude's reverence for classic rock against his hatred of boy bands.

"That's your last one," Carlos says as "Pillowtalk" gives way to a commercial.

He tunes back to the hip-hop station. "Hold On, We're Going Home" is playing and I have to stifle a laugh. Be careful what you wish for, I think to myself.

Carlos can't stand Drake. He's told me as much. He's a fucking pussy were his exact words. Of course, he'd be loath to admit that now, when control of the radio is at stake. I decide to stoke the fire.

"'Cause you're a good girl and you know it!'" I sing.

"Why do you like literally the worst shit?" Carlos says.

"I can change the station if you prefer," I say as I reach for the radio.

"Leave it!" he says.

"Yes, daddy!"

As soon as he turns his back, I tune back to pop. Mass groaning ensues as Shawn Mendes goes on about stitches. Carlos, however, is silent. He's standing still as a statue, staring me down.

***

If the warehouse gave out game balls at the end of each shift, Carlos would have more than the rest of roll-off combined. This is despite the fact that the dude is hardly physically intimidating. Indeed, the contrast between his tough guy persona and his tiny 5"2' frame is a gift that keeps on giving. One time, in an exercise designed to lighten the mood after a slog of a safety meeting, management made the entire staff of the warehouse line up on the floor of the line, single-file, tallest on the right and shortest on the left. There were approximately 30 people in the building and only a single woman was standing to the left of Carlos. It took the roll-off team hours to get all the laughter out of our system.

Carlos isn't particularly funny or clever either. While his insults come fast and furiously, they tend to be the predictable nonsense you would expect from someone that still considers "gay" a burn in the year of our Lord 2017. It's the same sort of mockery I've been dealing with my whole life. The words themselves don't really bother me.

But Carlos will wear you down through sheer attrition. His short fuse, gangbanger ethics and the fact that he values his pride over his job give him a willingness to escalate that's difficult to compete with. I once witnessed him empty an entire can of shaving cream onto the face of poor old man Kenneth. He also once swung a bag of hard toys, with all his might, at Donald after the two got into a heated argument. Then there was the time he was in a bad mood and discreetly coated some furniture with that aerosol "snow" stuff—the kind that people use on their windows as a Christmas decoration—in the hopes that some naive rube would ruin their clothes.

So I'm not sure what Naive Rube was thinking in perpetuating this tug-of-war over a stupid radio. Perhaps I felt like I deserved a fucking break. Roll-off already has a radio, after all. Sure, Anna controls the station. But everyone seems fine enough, usually, with the soul and R&B she prefers.

In any case, I'm not in the mood for Carlos' shit today.

***

I place a box of books at the edge of the container, right in front of Carlos.

"Are you just gong to stand there?" I ask.

"Give back the radio, you fucking pussy!" Carlos says. "Nobody wants to hear this pop shit!"

I know, dumbass. That's why this is so much fun.

"Give it back!" he repeats. He swipes for the radio but I grab it and place it out of his reach.

Carlos slices a bag of clothes with his pocketknife.

"I'm going to fuck you up!" he says. "Stupid little bitch! I'm going to fuck you up!"

"Cool story, bro."

"Are you really not gong to give it back?"

I laugh. Look, this entire thing is petty as fuck but the dude's entitlement really is something else.

"Give it back simply because you told me to? I'll pass but thanks."

"I'm going to give you one last chance," he says.

"Oh noes! Make sure you play some Justin Bieber at my funeral."

Carlos is fucking seething. He pulls the still-as-a-statue move again in an attempt to intimidate but roll-off simply functions around him. Nobody else seems to care much about the radio war and that's fine by me. When Carlos finally realizes that his protest isn't going to work, he grabs the box of books and gets back to business. Apollo for the win!

As an alternative kid with a preference for dark clothing and bulky accessories, the sun has long been the bane of my existence. This is especially true as I age, as one of the ways I temper insecurities about my ever-expanding waistline is by burying myself in layers. Today, however, the sun is an unlikely ally in my ongoing struggle against Carlos. It's 100 degrees out, see, and when it's this hot outside the container becomes almost unbearable, the metal walls stubbornly retaining the heat in a way that feels like you're working in a giant oven.

Pushing donations from inside the container is typically a two-person task but nobody else is up for it today. And the emptier it becomes, the safer I seem to be getting from Carlos' antagonism as I place the radio further and further from his reach. For a glorious hour I have the device all to myself. Ariana Grande! Lady Gaga! Hailee Steinfeld! Rihanna! I'm singing along, dancing like a maniac, and feeling pretty damn good. Then I hear a loud crash.

I turn around. Carlos is standing at the foot of the container, a crate of dishes in front of him.

I've seen this before. God forbid there's glass around when Carlos is angry because he'll start chucking it, his aim loose enough for probable deniability but accurate enough to make life hell.

He grabs a plate and throws it my way. It shatters near my feet.

"Calm the fuck down!" I say.

"Give me the radio."

"Come and get it.

Carlos hops into the container. Fuck. Here we go.

Of course, he's not grabbing anything without going through me first. It's too damn empty in here. I step towards him to obstruct his path. We meet in the middle of the container. Our faces are inches apart.

One, Mississippi. Two, Mississippi. Three, Mississippi. Four, Mississippi. Five, Mississippi. Six—

"Fuck this gay ass music," he finally says. Then he turns and walks away. *** A short time later we finish unloading the container. Two hours remain in the workshift but supervisor Stella tells us that we won't be getting more trucks until tomorrow. She assigns the guys to other tasks in the building while I stay behind on the dock to tidy up.

For good measure, I empty the batteries from the radio and throw them in a bin designated for hazardous materials. Then I smash the radio on the floor, throw the pieces in the electronics gaylord, then pull it inside the warehouse.

Give me my damn game ball.

#minwagepop

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angelic-guardienne · 5 years

Text

Flower Shop AU (Prompto/Reader)

Isn’t it funny how I open requests and then? Don’t answer any requests??? Anyway, I texted this scenario to a friend back in November and I recently found it again while looking for something else. Soooo I decided to type it up, buff it up, and post it, and here it is.

Tagging: @blindedstarlight @joioliviapolaroid @crazykruemel @ponkita @tales-of-a-fallen-star @valkyrieofardyn @insomniacapples @kawaiinekorose @glacian-apocalypse @honey-your-bee-puns-sting @singergurl91 @commitmentroses @tea-and-ebony-for-my-chocobros @sakuraangel1 @tiniestofqueens @bestchocobois @jaysfandomcorner

Premise: AU where everyone lives and Insomnia is rebuilt. Noctis rules over the nation as its king and foreign relations are amazing. The bros stand by his side as his personal crownsguard, just like they did when they were on the road.

I love flower shops, so you run a flower shop. It’s small, you’re the owner and most times the only one there, so you’re always there.

One day, a cute little blonde with the most beautiful blue eyes comes in. He buys a bouquet of flowers, gives you a hella bright smile, and leaves without much talk

Some other day, the blonde returns, and this time he has a friend -- an absolute giant of a man with burning amber eyes and scars galore and a voice like moving mountains. This friend buy a bouquet of gladioli and irises and he gives you a grateful little nod before they both leave

It’s on his next visit -- he’s by himself, I might add -- that the lil blondie introduces himself: Prompto. Even though he’s not been at the shop nearly enough to be considered a regular, you consider him one anyways

You two chat for a bit until another customer comes in, after which Prompto leaves. He says he doesn’t wanna distract you

Prompto returns one day and he’s brought someone else -- another friend, you presume -- and this one is tall and lithe, illegally graceful in his movements and wearing gloves and wide, tinted shades. He takes a whiff of nearly every flower in the store and you watch bemusedly as Prompto trails behind him excitedly

Suddenly the man stops and plucks a bouquet from its display and walks right over to the counter. “These are camellias, yes?” He asks in such a refined voice that you’re taken back a bit, but you still manage a yes.

Prompto looks super pleased while his friend buys the bouquet, commenting that those flowers were his mother’s favorite

When Prompto leaves that day, you catch yourself wondering what kind of character he’ll be bringing in next (not that you’re complaining, it’s seriously increasing your business)

Prompto visits often, and one day you ask why. You know he buys more flowers than any one person would reasonably need unless he’s trying to start his own shop and drive yours out of business (he laughs and tells you it’s definitely not that)

He leans against the counter and gives you this warm smile. “It was for interior design at first. I just wanted a burst of color, you know?”

And yeah, you know, but that “at first” implies a lot, Prompto

So he continues, “Then I started getting them for certain occasions like, you know, leaving flowers on a grave or something, or helping my friend’s little sister start up her garden, things like that. Now I’m basically giving them away because I have more flowers than I know what to do with.”

And, reasonably, you ask, “my flowers aren’t exactly cheap at the bulk that you’re buying them in, so why do you keep buying them?”

And he says, “cause I wanted an excuse to see you.”

(for those worried about it, Prompto’s getting the money for all these flowers cause I’m making the assumption that the crownsguard gets paid big cash)

Anyways

So you’re flustered of course, and your brain goes to a default response -- “I’m hiring if you wanna see me more” and you’re so, so lucky that it makes prompto laugh instead of weirding him out or something, because boy his laugh is auditory g o l d

He says, “How about a date instead?” (when did prompto get so smooth?) and you just nod because you don’t exactly trust your voice. You jot down your phone number on his receipt -- he bought a bouquet of the flowers you passively mentioned were your favorites

He hands it back to you, like a gift, and you jokingly tell him not to break bank buying flowers, even if the profits help a lot

The date goes unbelievably well, I gotta say. Y’all go to a nice, homey lil restaurant and then to a bakery, where you two share a few cookies and some other pastries

With that date, you guys go on another, and another, and another, and I can officially say that y’all are head over heels, absolutely smitten with each other

One day, Prom swings by and he has the whole entire actual king with him. You send him a panicked look and he just kinda shrugs sheepishly (mildly helplessly) as Noctis gives the shop a solid once-over and goes straight to the counter

“You’re (Y/N), right?” the king says, and you’re like holy fuck holy fuck the king knows me by name what the fuck what the fuck wh

and you just squeak out a little “yeah, that’s me”

And Noctis holds both of your hands in his and stares you right in the eyes and thanks you so genuinely that you’re internally flipping your shit and left totally speechless

He thanks you for making Prompto happy, he thanks you for loving him, he thanks you for helping him find the light in life again, he thanks you for so much

And then he jokingly says, “please tell him to stop buying so many flowers, the citadel is practically full of them” and prompto just lets out the cutest little indignant noise, and you’re just like “with all due respect, your majesty, he’s one of my best customers”

Noctis just laughs. “Fair enough,” and he thanks you one more time before he takes his leave

Apparently, having the actual king come to your little shop drastically increased the appeal so business absolutely skyrocketed, as did the number of applicants for open slots around the shop.

(It was actually the fact that he mentioned your shop specifically in a televised interview)

It gets popular enough and you end up making enough money and hiring enough people that you can finally get some more free time, which Prompto definitely takes advantage of

You get to spend a lot more time around his friends and family (the bros) and you finally get to truly interact with the people you’ve heard so much about from him

Iris teaches the two of you how to make flower crowns, so of course you guys make them all the time and gift them to everyone, including each other

Meeting Cor was a little daunting at first, considering that he’s basically the closest thing that Prompto has to a father, but once you two start talking everything goes smoothly. Cor, like Noctis, genuinely appreciates everything you’ve done for Prompto and just really likes you too, so.

Sometimes Cor will share embarrassing and/or funny stories from when he was still getting to know Prompto and they always make you laugh and give you a deeper appreciation of your boyfriend. Prompto, of course, always tries to get him to stop (and he always fails).

Overall, you and Cor are on really good terms. Y’all get along well, and you also really like his cats (and they like you) so you don’t mind spending time around him.

Sometimes he comes into the shop and buys his own bouquets. If you ever ask why, he says he’s trying to charm this little lady he met at a party. If you inquire further, goodness he could go on about her forever, and it always makes you really happy to see that Cor has someone in his life, too

But yes, whenever you’re at the shop, Prompto will come in and buy flowers for you, because he never quite got out of the little habit of buying flowers from you, for you. His favorite thing to do is to buy the bouquet and then hand it right back over the counter.

You always shake your head at him and tell him he’s basically paying you to own something you already own, but every single time, without fail, the bouquet goes into a vase somewhere at home

Eventually, you learn that when Prompto said he was giving the flowers away, he was literally just dumping him on the bros. He was frantically explaining, “I want to ask them out but I’m scared to and the only way I can see them is buying more flowers and help”

Gladio is the one that finally pushes him to ask you out because he has literally reached his capacity for new flowers, and all the others agreed with him

That’s how Prom finally asked you out -- his flower outlets closed on him and he had little other choices, but thank god they did because he’s so much happier thanks to you.

#ffxv #final fantasy xv #prompto #prompto argentum #writing #flower shop au #finally wrote something #it feels like it's been forever #i hope y'all enjoy this fluff!!

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versdan · 5 years

Text

What Are You Waiting For? (Ben Hardy x Reader)

request: hi!! could you write ben x reader where she is joe’s younger sister and ben acts strange around her because he is in love with her since always (because she is also an actress and she did a really famous tv show) and then one day she does something and ben says out loud “i think i want to marry you” please !! thx

A/N: omg bless ur soul for this request. I hope y’all like this! Sorry for any typos! requests are open !!!

Being an actress meant you were busy. Working on movies, doing interveiws, press back and forth consumed up your life. It was a bliss moment when you realize you have a week off after doing press from a month straight for your TV show that had just premiered and was a huge success.

You’re in your hotel room, reading a book you haven’t been able to read for a while when you get a phone call from your brother Joe. You pick up the phone

“hello?”

“(Y/N)!” Joe said, basically screamed since there was some music playing in the background

“Hey Joey” you giggled “What’s up?” “Well, a little birdy had told me that you have a week off and what wouldn’t be better than to have you on set and spend time with you!” he said, excitedly

You thought about it for a moment and you smiled “Okay sure, when can I come ov-” he cut you off immediately “Great! I’ll send you the address! Everyone is going to be so happy to see you especially a little someone” You can imagine him smirking when he finished the line

You laugh “yeah, yeah Joe, taunt me all you want about it. I’ll see you in a bit”

“Okay, byeeeee!!” he said and he hung up

You sigh and put the phone down. Another thing about being an actress was having little time in you personal life. Your brother, Joe Mazzello, was also an incredible actor. Not only were you both each other’s biggest support systems, he also helped you get into acting and starting up. When you found out he got casted to be John Deacon for the new Queen biopic, you were insanely excited for him. He took you to meet the whole cast on the first day of shooting which was the Live Aid scene. You couldn’t help but catch the eye of a certain blonde during the scene. Ben Hardy.

You had always thought Ben was good looking and charming. It wasn’t odd when you two instantly clicked inbetween shooting the scenes, laughing about anything. All the other guys noticed the chemistry, especially Joe who gave you “the talk” about dating a guy and the birds and the bees to which you responded “Joe! You’re not my dad!” Ben had begun to develop a crush on you, even before he met you. He had seen the films you’ve been in and interviews, which only made him fall more for your sweet demeanor. It didn’t help when Joe talked about how incredible you were since it made the crush grow. Ben may or may not have fangirled internally (or fanboy-ed) when Joe said you were coming to view the guys do the Live Aid scene.

You got ready instantly once you received Joe’s text of the address. Walking out of your room, not before checking yourself in the mirror to make sure you looked good and then heading for the film set.

You arrived in 10 minutes to a building when you saw Joe outside waiting for you. He saw the cab pull up and smiled when you got out. “Joey!” You screamed rushing to hug him. He hugged you back tightly for a couple of seconds before pulling away. “Long time no see lil sis” he said as he ruffled your hair. You huffed and smacked his arm “you know I still hate that” “yeah yeah, come one let’s go inside”

You both walked inside to be greeted by Gwilym and Rami first. “(Y/N)!! It’s so good to see you!” Gwil said as he hugged you “likewise!” He pulled away so Rami could hug you “Darling, I missed you” he said as he hugged you. You laughed “I missed you too Rami, or should I say Freddie” he laughed as he pulled away. You looked behind Rami to see Ben standing there already staring at you. You smiled and walked over to him. “Hey” he said, just looking at you, up and down. “Hey” you said back, awkwardly and shyly under his gaze. “Come here” he said with open arms. You smiled, looking up at him and hugging him. Whenever you guys touched, it was like an electric shock went through your body and it was euphoric with a hint of butterflies coming to your stomach. You pulled away, faces close enough to feel his breath fanning yours. “JUST GET A ROOM ALREADY!” Joe yelled, making the other guys and crew around laugh. You snapped out of his gaze and turned around to flip Joe off

“Alright everyone! Places!” The director shouted as the boys went back into set but Ben stayed for a little bit. “Duty calls” he says smiling. “Go be a rockstar” you said, smiling back. He turned to walk away and got into his place for the scene.

Throughout filming, you couldn’t help but stare at Ben. His physic was something you adored but also his personality. Ben would catch you staring and every once in a while would shoot you a wink that would make you blush and look away.

You got up from your seat to walk around, seeing someone setting up the snack table. “Do you need any help?” You asked the assistant. He looked up at you, wide eyed and then snapped back “U-Uh yes that would be nice. Sorry I’m a huge fan” he stated. You giggled and smiled “awe thank you”. You helped him set out water bottles, plates and the food platters.

What you didn’t know was Ben was watching you the whole time. The director had called cut on the scene since one of the cameras had shut off, which would take a couple minutes to repair. While Ben watched you, he couldn’t help but realize how much he has fallen for you and didn’t think he could fall any further, but he did and is. Joe stood beside him, as he watched his sister help out with the table and conversing with the team. You laughed at one of their jokes and Ben sighed audibly that Joe heard. “You know I don’t know why you haven’t asked her out” Joe stated, still watching you but Ben tore his gaze away to look at Joe. “She probably doesn’t want someone like me or likes me” he said, looking back to you. You looked at Ben and smiled before going back to your conversation

“She actually does. I’m probably going to get killed for saying this but she likes you. A lot. Make your move now loverboy or someone else willllll” Joe said, dragging the ‘L’ and walking away. Ben looked at him with wide eyes, with this new information, he then looked back at you and smiled widely. He made his way over to you and said “Can I grab you for a minute?” You looked at him, nodding yes, saying excuse me to the group you were taking to

You walked out of the room into an empty hallway with Ben. “What’s up?” “I like you” he blurted out, staring at you. You stared at him with wide eyes and said “I like you too Ben” “No no I mean, I really like you. Almost like completely fallen in love with you. You’re just so caring and selfless which makes me fall for you more and you’re absolutely, positively stunning and-“ you cut him off but crashing your lips onto his, feeling the euphoria feeling you loved so much. He kissed back the with same amount of force, almost making you melt because of how good and right it felt.

You pulled away catching your breath. “God, I think I want to marry you” he said, opening his eyes and staring into your eyes as you held his face inbetween your hands. You smile widely and peck his lips. “Then what you waiting for?”

#ben hardy imagine #ben hardy #borhap cast #roger taylor #ben!roger taylor #borhap #send in requests #send me asks #rami malek #gwilym lee #joe mazzello #gigglygwil ben

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markhycks · 6 years

Text

markhyuck au where

it’s their first christmas together as a couple (continuation of real estate agent au)

so mark’s nickname for donghyuck is ‘spirit’

it’s so adorable bc hyuck always pretends to get mad about it even though lowkey he kinda likes it bc it makes him feel special that someone has a nickname for him?? (how soft right?)

whenever he tries to be mad at mark for it mark just embarrasses him about it and uses his own words against him, like the phrases hyuck used to use to scare him as a ghost

it’s so cute though

so sometimes when hyuck wakes up in the middle of the night to get like a glass of water and mark’s probably already up doing his lil real estate work bc he’s a busy bee (pls rest soon mr fully capable!!) he’ll use this fake deep n ~scary~ voice and he’s all “WHO GOES THERE”

and hyuck just j u m p s and he’s mad like “Wtf r u doing??!?! it’s 3 goddamn AM who are you trying to kill what if i had a seizure”

and mark just can’t stop laughing bc he’s lowkey a savage too n he’s all “wow hypocrite, you literally used to do the same to people that’d come view the house??”

hyuck just goes red and he’s embarrassed

mark carries on teasing him by using all the cheesy ghost phrases hyuck used to (like srsly where did donghyuck even get his knowledge of ghosts from who evensays ‘who goes there’ anymore)

donghyuck’s just embarrassed and he’s all “whatever” and quietly drinks his water before heading back to bed

mark can only smile fondly at his boo and pats his butt as he leaves as a form of apology

donghyuck doesn’t mind anyway and reminds mark to sleep soon

ok so anyway it’s christmas soon!!

and mark’s like, all about christmas he’s a WHOLE christmas enthusiast and he loves christmas jumper day at work and wears his fav christmas jumper which is rudolph with a bright led red nose that lights up and he’s just s o excited to put up decorations in their house

donghyuck doesn’t have many memories of christmas and views it as any other day

when mark hears about this he just gets so sad and he hugs hyuck and the poor boy is emo all day bc ??? hyuck hasn’t celebrated christmas before

donghyuck’s just rolling his eyes because his boyfriend is so dramatic but he lets mark cling sadly to him all day (mostly bc he can’t even get him off him in the first place)

mark buys donghyuck a christmas jumper with little christmas trees that also have lights on them

and donghyuck pretends to hate it but on the inside he’s just so happy n shy n blushy bc what did he do to deserve such an amazing boyfriend??

jisung comes over occasionally and him and donghyuck get along pretty well (they both gang up on mark always) and one day he brings his best friend chenle with him so they can all help put up decorations in their home

mark wants it to be extra special because it’s donghyuck’s first actual christmas and also their first christmas together

hyuck’s like “pLEASE stop making this a big deal” but mark’s just huffy n puffy like “nO it has to be special its our first christmas together!!”

so hyuck just rolls his eyes like ok FINE and they even go out together to choose a tree

so come the day where they put up their decorations

chenle’s the l o u d e s t boy ever and him and jisung are both just so hyper together but they’re really fun boys

they spend the day attempting to put up the tree and lights and they blast christmas songs all evening

at one point mark jumps up onto a table to dramatically lip synch to mariah’s all i want for christmas while pointing at a mortified donghyuck

chenle and jisung can’t stop laughing bc its s o hilarious and jisung records it on the sly (bc brother duties!!) as blackmail material

donghyuck goes silent bc he is so SHY and also embarrassed

mark gives everyone second hand embarrassment

but they still love him

at one point mark asks donghyuck to grab the star from their room

hyuck’s like oki and heads into their room to search for it

mark quietly follows him when he’s gone and jisung and chenle share a knowing glance with each other when they see him holding a mistletoe behind his back

jisung pretends to gag while chenle only coos

donghyuck spots the star and picks it up before heading back out to the living room

just as he gets to the doorway mark’s standing there in front of him with an unreadable expression on his face

“hey i got the star-wait what’s wrong?” he blinks, confused

mark’s lips curl upwards into a small smile as he holds up the mistletoe high in between them

donghyuck’s eyes follow the mistletoe and then to mark as he blinks in confusion, his cheeks heating up

he doesn’t know why he feels so embarrassed today

maybe he’s just overwhelmed at the idea of spending christmas with mark??

he pretends to play dumb and clears his throat, fingers curling over the star in his hands

“so..”

mark raises a brow at him, slightly dumbfounded

“what do you mean so? look!” he says, dangling the mistletoe in between them

donghyuck lets out a playful scoff before pursing his lips

“kiss me then, stupid.”

so mark does

donghyuck’s lips are soft against mark’s, they’re warm and still taste like honey, it’s still his favorite taste

they both stay like that for a while until mark lowers his arms to bring them around donghyuck’s frame, gently holding him against his chest as the younger continues to press soft kisses to his lips, fingers still clutching onto the star

mark’s hands give hyuck’s waist a gentle squeeze and all he wants to do is stay like this forever

they’re interrupted by a loud scream (surprise: it’s chenle)

later when they finally manage to decorate the tree, mark INSISTS that donghyuck put up the star just because

hyuck hates being put on the spot like this since he’s not used to it but chensung and mark are looking at him with hopeful eyes and he really loves his boyfriend so much so he’s like o ok

jisung (as the tallest) has to give him a piggy back so that he can reach the top of the tree

as he’s putting up the star he has to stretch a lil more bc it’s so?? far away still??

“jisung move closer a lil pls”

and so jisung does

but donghyuck still can’t reach and so he makes the mistake of tugging at a branch

CRASH

the fuckin tree topples over and jisung and donghyuck topple over and all their endless effort has gone to wASTE

everyone just goes silent for like 5 seconds staring at the DISASTER that is their tree

donghyuck feels so bad bc he knows its his fault and he panics and looks at mark

mark’s blank for a moment before he lets out the loudest snort

and soon they’re all laughing so much because it’s just so ?? funny ??

slowly they start putting the decorations and lights back onto the tree and this time mark grabs a stool for donghyuck to stand on before putting up the star

it goes right this time

they’re all so tired and mark suggests ordering takeout but chenle and jisung already have made dinner plans to eat at this new restaurant and mark’s a lil butthurt that he wasn’t invited

they only roll their eyes and say their goodbyes as donghyuck flops onto the couch tiredly

mark takes a seat beside him “move over, lazy ass”

donghyuck huffs and proceeds to sprawl over the couch more, his head nuzzling onto mark’s lap before he glances up at his boyfriend

mark smiles fondly at him, giving his hair a little ruffle

“thanks for today, mark. i really had fun”

“anytime, my little ghost of christmas past”

donghyuck blinks at him, confused

“your what?”

and mark just g a p e s

because donghyuck hasn’t read or seen A Christmas Carol??

when their dinner finally arrives, mark insists that they have to watch it that night (even though donghyuck’s complaining bc mark has work the next morning)

they end up watching it even though mark ends up falling asleep near the end

donghyuck watches the whole thing and lowkey he’s a huge fan already

also bah humbug becomes his new favorite catchphrase

mark’s workplace is having a christmas party at the office and they’re each allowed to invite one guest

so o f c o ur s e mark has to bring his boo

donghyuck’s already met most of his boyfriends colleagues and he’s really really fond of sicheng (whose internship has now ended and is a full employee at the company)

they play cheesy christmas games and wear crowns and boss taeil gets super hyper it’s hilarious

he spends the evening ganging up on mark with his colleagues

mark also ends up drinking a lil and he gets kinda tipsy (really mark?? on wine??) and he’s all red and tired and clinging to hyuck the entire time

they make out secretly in taeil’s office when mark says he wants to show hyuck a ‘document’

mark’s a clingy drunk and donghyuck finds it so adorable

donghyuck doesn’t have his permit yet and mark is not allowed to drive while drunk (no drink-driving, kids!) so they have to get jaehyun to drop them home who will drop mark’s car over later on

mark’s being all touchy when they get home that night and hyuck’s like p le as e as he tries to help his boyfriend out of his shoes

that night they end up cuddling with donghyuck being the big spoon

when they wake up however, mark’s worried about his lil baby’s arms getting numb and he immediately pulls hyuck into his arms, brushing gentle kisses to his temple

they spend christmas eve with mark’s family back at his parents home

jisung has invited chenle over and one of his cousins jeno has invited his boyfriends jaemin and renjun over too

they all get along with donghyuck (esp mark’s mother she absolutely a d o r e s him and treats him like her own son)

donghyuck’s shy again because!! family!! so mark squeezes his hand under the table and gives him reassuring glances the whole evening

hyuck sticks to his side the whole night and at one point mark’s mother calls him into the kitchen to help with dessert

when he goes in she gives him a big hug and tells him she loves him and kisses his forehead

donghyuck bursts into tears right there bc suddenly he misses his parents and he’s never experienced being with family before and he’s just super overwhelmed

she tells him that she’s happy that mark has found someone like him and that her son is lucky

in his head he thinks its the other way around

mark’s watching them from the doorway, an overjoyed expression on his face bc he’s so happy and he just sniffles silently

they sleep in mark’s childhood bedroom that night and mark shares stories about his childhood

the bed they’re on isn’t exactly for two people so there’s a spare mattress on the floor

donghyuck insists he’ll take the floor but then decides it’s too cold despite all the blankets

he climbs onto the bed and sprawls onto his boyfriend’s chest while he’s asleep

mark groans, playfully teasing him about being heavy before pressing his lips to donghyuck’s nose and bringing his arms around him

the next morning mark’s awake first and he’s so !!! excited !!! because it’s christmas !!

he shakes hyuck awake (who actually woke up before him but pretended to be asleep) and plants a kiss square onto his lips

donghyuck groans playfully about his morning breath and they end up getting into a brief pillow fight until there’s a knock on the door

as they get dressed into their christmas sweaters again, donghyuck pulls his boyfriend towards by the hem of his sleeve

“what’s up?” mark asks

donghyuck leans over to kiss his boyfriend once more, fingers gently lacing with mark’s before he pulls away

“thank you for all of this, really” he whispers, eyes twinkling

mark just looks at his boyfriend with the s w e e te s t gaze, arms coming to wrap around donghyuck

“merry christmas, donghyuck. i love you”

“i love you too, mark”

and they hold hands before heading out into the living room

#markhyuck #markhyuck au #hdfhghghh i needed this out of my system #i skipped some parts like esp presents bc my mind went zzz on me #anyway i rly love this au ???#i might write more headcanons on it #headcanon #chensung #mark #donghyuck #haechan #nct #nct dream #nct 127 #ninja norenmin #real estate agent au

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