#but after this i think i'm gonna consider drinking water now

[mspaint-flower]

can you give flower water so she can stay hydrated?

remember to stay hydration

[lihhelsing]

steddie | 1,7k words | angst | mature

Written for @steddieangstyaugust Day 13

Prompt: "Please, Stay"

Read Part 1 | Part 2

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Eddie spends a lot of time having no words. 

As Steve carries him back to the beemer, Eddie doesn't have words. He hums against Steve's shoulder when Steve asks him if it's ok for him to put him down but in reality he would very much like to keep clinging to Steve. 

He has no words as Steve pats his pockets until he finds his keys to open the trailer door and he almost says something to calm Steve down about Wayne not being there but Steve doesn't seem worried about it.

Which really should clue him in that there are things he is unaware of, but his face is bloodied and his chest hurts every time he breathes and he doesn't have energy to worry about it. 

Steve carries him to the couch and puts him down gently, but it still hurts. 

Eddie closes his eyes when his head hits the pillow but he lets out a low groan when he feels Steve moving away. 

"I need to clean you," Steve says and Eddie can hear him moving through the trailer. Maybe he should feel embarrassed, but he doesn't. 

Steve Harrington is at his house after all. If Eddie plays his cards right maybe he'll get his Star Wars marathon after all. 

When he comes back, Eddie almost says something, but then Steve is touching him and it hurts but it's also so good. He's gentle and sweet and he bats Eddie's hands away when he tries to touch his cut. 

"Behave, Eddie," Steve says, and Eddie groans, but he abides. 

When he's done, Eddie immediately misses his touch. 

"I'm gonna get you something for the pain. I think you might have a broken rib and the best advice I can give you is to rest and wait until it's healed."

Eddie groans again and delights himself with Steve's laugh as he walks around the trailer as if he belongs there. Eddie imagined someone like Steve wouldn't feel comfortable in a shithole like the trailer. 

Not that Eddie doesn't love it. He does. So fucking much. But Steve lives in a mansion, his bedroom alone is probably bigger than Eddie's entire house. 

Steve comes back and he helps Eddie to sit down. He feels better, even if everything still hurts. But he's home and Steve's there because he found him by some miracle and now he's putting a glass of water to Eddie's lips and helping him swallow a pill that will probably make him sleepy. 

Steve smiles proudly when Eddie drinks the entire glass and moves to put it back in the kitchen and that's when Eddie sees it. 

His eyes move to their old center table and he knows what he's going to find there. One of his Star Wars cassettes that he was too lazy to put away the other day. 

Maybe he could get away with suggesting they watch it but as his brain is considering the best way to ask Steve that, he spots something that so obviously doesn't belong there he has no idea how he hadn't noticed it before. 

A big bouquet of flowers. Red roses, if Eddie is not mistaken. 

He moves even as his entire body seems about to catch on fire and grabs it, pulling it closer to smell it. 

They smell good. Eddie doesn't think he ever saw such gorgeous flowers and he knows for a fact Wayne didn't buy them. He's more of a Peonies kind of guy. 

Which only leaves...

"Oh, uh, sorry, I shouldn't have-" Steve says once he's back, and he moves to get the flowers but Eddie holds on to them. 

"Did you really stood up a date to go rescue me?" Eddie asks, and he doesn't know why he does it.

Steve frowns as he looks down at Eddie, "Oh, no, the flowers are-"

Eddie breaks eye contact with Steve because he feels bad now. Glances at the clock, it's almost nine. 

"If you show up at her doorstep with these flowers, I bet she'll forgive you for missing the date," Eddie says, and then he raises the bouquet in Steve's direction so he can take it. "I'm sorry I got in the way."

Steve grabs the flowers and Eddie thinks this is it, he's going to leave and Eddie will be left alone to lick his wounds. But then he puts them back on the table and kneels in front of Eddie. 

"Don't be sorry. I was worried about you and I'm glad I trusted my gut," Steve says and he does the sweetest thing, cupping Eddie's face and looking directly into his eyes.

Eddie feels... naked. Completely stripped of his attitude and his snark and everything else he uses to protect himself. 

The worst of it all is that it feels good. He feels a calm washing over him when he's this close to Steve. He has no idea when his dynamic with Steve changed from the King and the Freak to this. 

To Steve on his knees on the trailer being the one fucking good thing in Eddie's life right now. 

But Eddie knows better than to believe that things are really like this. That even if Steve is something good in his life, he knows it's not the same for Steve. Eddie is still just his drug dealer, the one person who can get him some weed for free. 

"You don't have to do that," Eddie says and Steve raises a brow. Up this close, Eddie can count the freckles on his face and he's trying so hard not to stare at his lips. 

"Do what?"

"Take care of me," Eddie says even as he's cringing inside. Even as if all he ever wanted was someone to take care of him like Steve is doing and now he's pushing him away. 

"I don't mind," Steve says as his thumb moves on Eddie's cheek.

It's too soft and Eddie is all sharp edges. 

"You don't have to do that to get free weed."

Steve pulls back as if he got burned. There's a shift in his expression that Eddie hates and he thinks maybe this is the reason he has nothing good in his life. 

"Maybe I should go," Steve says and Eddie feels it on a molecular level. He doesn't want Steve to go but he doesn't know how to ask him to stay. 

"Don't forget the flowers," Eddie says and Steve looks at him like he's insane. 

"Eddie," he says softly. Eddie sees him almost reaching his hand but giving up mid-air. 

"She probably won't even care about the flowers, dude. If you show up looking like this, she'll take you anyway."

Steve presses his lips together. He's annoyed, Eddie can tell, but he has no idea why. Eddie is complimenting Steve and the fact that all he has to do is smile and then he has any girl he wants. 

"That's good, because the flowers weren't for 'her'," Steve says the last word making air quotes and Eddie doesn't get it. 

"I'm not following," Eddie says. He's still on the couch and Steve is still on his knees and it's so fucking weird. 

"There's no girl, Eddie," Steve says and maybe Eddie hit his head when he fell because this doesn't make sense. 

"Are they for your mother?" He asks and even as he does it he knows it's a dumb question. Steve doesn't talk about his family a lot, but from the little he does, Eddie knows his mom is not the flower type. 

She would need to be around for his son to get her flowers. 

"You know they are not for my mother. I carried you inside, Eddie. How the hell would I've brought the flowers too?"

Eddie stares at him as he lets the words sink in. It's a little embarrassing that Steve had him in his arms, especially because he could've walked on his own but Steve felt warm and nice and Eddie had no idea when he would have him this close again. 

"The flowers were already here," Eddie says under his breath and he can't lie, Steve's exasperated expression is kind of cute. 

"The flowers were already here," Steve repeats as if Eddie needs him to. And maybe he does because that doesn't make sense unless...

"Were you here waiting for me? Did Wayne let you in?"

Steve smiles and claps his hands once as if he's proud of Eddie for figuring it out. 

"I was waiting for you. And Wayne did let me in. I was actually waiting in my car because I didn't know if you'd appreciate me meeting your uncle like this, but he tapped on my window and said he knew who I was and told me I could wait inside if I wanted. He had to leave and said you'd probably be here soon and then you weren't and I started getting worried and I decided to go look for you."

Steve says all in one go and Eddie feels glued in place as he looks at him. Wayne knows Eddie's been sporting a huge crush on Steve for months and he knows his uncle was delighted that he would have something to mock Eddie with. 

"Why were you waiting for me?" Eddie asks and he feels dumb as the words leave his mouth but Steve just smiles fondly, as if he thinks it's cute that Eddie is that naive. 

"With flowers," Steve adds and Eddie sighs. 

"Why were you waiting for me with flowers, Steve?"

"Because," Steve says and Eddie's afraid he's not going to elaborate. That he's going to leave Eddie to figure out for himself and worse, that he's just going to leave because he can't take Eddie's dumbness. "I was hoping the flowers would make my intentions clear."

"I'm not sure they did," Eddie says, eyeing the flowers behind Steve. They are nice. The kind of flowers you get for someone you really care about. 

"Eddie!" Steve says and Eddie snorts because he's being a little shit on purpose. "I'm going to leave."

"Please, Steve," Eddie says and he has him again. Doe eyes and full attention on him. "Please, stay."

Steve smiles and nods and Steve leans in and Eddie thinks he's going for a kiss but he just hugs Eddie and for now, that's enough. 

[umnitsa]

Still a dirty old man

Summary: Joel is on his seventies, but he still has needs. Well, we all have needs.

A/N: Ok, so. Look, I'm gonna be honest: life kicked my ass, I just got into college (again eeee), god knows how this is gonna go, but here, I heard you all: I wanted more and there is more. I can't help myself, I want this man in dirty, horrible ways. Thanks @romanarose, for the pair of eyes and as always, thanks for everyone who asked for more and cheered me with this. Really, I can't thank you enough.

(I must admit that I don't know if I'll ever continue this, specially with the way life is going now. Although part of me wants to get to three thousand sex scenes, I need to be honest: not even I know if this will continue. Don't wanna give y'all false promises.)

Pairing: No outbreak old man!Joel x Reader

CW: Joel being bold, me trying dirty talk and failing miserably, a handjob, very much predator/prey dynamics

No beta, we die like lonely writers xD

Joel behaved as if nothing happened, and so did you.

Things were somewhat tense though. Not for Joel, no. The man just smirked everytime he saw you then lowered his head and chuckled, as if he knew something you didn’t know.

You had to admit it bothered you.

Cocky bastard.

You moved into the kitchen, needing some water. You could hear the faint sounds of tv in the living room, so Joel was sitting down on his recliner, watching some late night sports.

You wondered if Joel would want a snack before sleep, as you filled your cup distractedly. You took a drink, considering the options in the fridge, when a loud cheering sound comes from the living room. You startled, the glass shatters on the floor with a loud noise and your yelp.

“What happened?” Joel yelled from the living room, concern clear in his voice.

“I just dropped a glass, Joel! You don’t need to worry, I’m gonna clean it.” You said, getting on your knees carefully. You placed your hands on the floor and lowered your face to see better. Glass was tricky to see.

You checked the floor, picking the pieces of glass and piling them together; you thought of getting a bag, or some paper to wrap them on after making sure all the glass was retrieved.

“Mmmm…” you heard, and you turned your head back. Joel was at the kitchen door, looking down intensely at your ass. “Such a heavenly view… Makes me wanna get on my knees… Worship your asshole and your pretty pussy with my tongue.” Joel licked his lips and you blushed.

“Joel!” You said, sternly.

“What?” He asked, no shame whatsoever.

“Come on.” You complained, picking the rest of the shattered glass as quickly as you could. As you move angrily you felt a sharp sting of pain. “Fuck!”

Joel quickly wobbled by your side and watched your bleeding finger.

“Here, honey… Leave it. We can clean it later.” He offered you his broad hand, suddenly overflowing with gentleness. “Lemme see your hand.”

You stood up, mesmerized by his eyes, and show you his hand. He held it between his calloused, big, bony ones and slowly leaned to suckle on the tip of your finger.

You were so mesmerized by his deep brown eyes focused on yours, glinting with mischief, that you only realize what he is doing with the first gentle swipe of his tongue against your skin. He gently swirled his tongue around your fingertip, suckling softly; he was showing you what he can do with your clit.

He smirked when you moaned, still holding your wrist with one hand, the other moving down out of your sight.

Joel sighed deeply, in relief, and you realized he opened his pants and took his cock out. He massaged the shaft slowly and you could only watch, dumbrounded, your mouth half open.

“He always wakes up for you, honey.” Joel chuckled. “I thought we were retired, but there he is. Since you came into the house my pants got way too tight. I keep thinking of making you my three-hole-wonder, honey.” He licked his lips and smirked. “Maybe you should give him a little kiss, at least to calm him down.”

The old man looked down, pouting and doe eyed, then back to your face. You found it hard to resist him, when he looked at you like that.

“We can’t do this, Joel.” You swallowed your saliva, considering his cock. It was long, and thick, from tip to base, the head an angry purple that made you want to suck on it. You considered the pain and the stretch he would give you, and the more you thought, the more you wanted to just give in. “I’m supposed to care for your needs.” You said, distractedly.

Your mouth watered and you licked your lips.

“We are both adults.” His eyebrows raised, and he cocked his head. “This is clearly a need. And only you can care for this one.” He smirked again, proudly. His hand kept moving, in this slow, hypnotizing pace.

“So you don’t do this to the day nurse?” You scoffed.

“She’s not my type.” Joel shrugged, a playful expression in his eyes. “Way too young and way too thin.” After a moment of silence, Joel steps forward and holds your hand. He watched your reactions carefully, sliding his calloused thumb over the back of your hand.

You didn’t move.

Joel raised your hand to his face and spit on your palm. You jumped, startled; another chuckle came from him, filling the space between you. Gently, he wrapped your hand around his cock. His big, bony fingers engulfed yours, guiding you into his rhythm.

His cock felt a bit soft at first, but it still got bigger and harder in your hand.

“Mmmmm… Haven’t felt this good in decades.” He muttered, his voice low, eyes closed.

“We shouldn’t be doing this.” You whispered, more a reminder to yourself than a refusal.

“Not standing in the kitchen, we shouldn’t.” Joel growled. “But you didn’t give me much choice… You keep running, bunny. I’d rather taste you, but I take what I can get.”

“I… I…” You lost your words as you look into his eyes. He watched you intensely, his eyes locked into yours. You felt like he was drinking every single one of your reactions, a hawk-eyed creature looming over you, ready to devour you whole.

“Give in, honey.” His voice was gentle, soft, in contrast with the hunger in his expression. “It will make our nights much more fun.”

You whined, leaning forward, your eyes closed. You felt Joel’s lips against yours, one big hand cupping the back of your head, pulling you closer. He growled into the kiss. Your whole body tensed; you squeeze him, the meaning of what you’re doing suddenly very real.

Joel’s fingers clenched, tugging on your hair tightly. Your head moved back; you gasped as Joel’s slips slid down your jaw, towards your ear.

“Wanna run, bunny?” He whispered, his voice suddenly soft. “Don’t run. Just wanna ruin you a little bit.”

His hand squeezed yours; you followed his move, squeezing his cock. Joel moaned, cock twitching in your hand. He moaned loudly, hips thrusting forward. Grunting, he came; some of it transferring to your hand, some splashing against your thigh.

Joel stepped back, releasing you, a smug satisfied smile on his lips.

“See? Just a little bit.” He chuckled, pulling himself into his pants.

“Joel, we shouldn’t…”

“Honey, if you didn’t want me to keep trying, you would have told me. Or Sarah.” Joel huffed, interrupting you impatiently. “She would have killed me by now.”

“How do you know… You could lie to her and she would believe you.”

“I raised her right. And hell if she doesn’t know exactly the kind of man I am.” Joel chuckled, looking at you with a warm, appreciative smile. He shrugged. “You keep saying we shouldn’t, we can’t… You just don’t say we won’t.”

You bristled, puffing your chest and placing your hands on your hips, glaring at him. Your mouth half open, a thousand million tiny things you could say bubble in your throat.

“Go on. Just say: Joel, I won’t play this game with you. Stop right now.” Joel stood in front of you, watching your expression carefully.

The silence extended between you both.

You considered saying it, but you knew it would not be true. Deep inside you wanted him to hunt and ruin you. His smile broadened slowly, as the silent seconds went by. You blushed, lowering your head. You shook it gently.

“That’s what I thought.” He stepped closer to you, even his voice smug. “It’s ok, honey.” Joel caressed your hair, burying his fingers into the strands. He pulled your hair, making you look at him. “Nothing wrong with wanting this.”

Joel kissed you, hungry, impatient, devouring.

Then he left, informing you he would have an early night with a wink.

[starlight-bread-blog]

It's Zutara Month 2024 So I'm Gonna Discuss (See: Fangirl) Them and Emotional Labor

Katara cooks, sews, but most of all: she gives unconditional emotional support for her brother, and later the rest of the Gaang.

Illustrated after Appa was stolen, the Gaang got stuck in a desert without much water, food or any means of transportation besides their legs. Katara gave everyone her bending water, without drinking any herself, responded to everyone with compassion, and by the end she helped bring Aang back to himself while he was out of control in the Avatar State.

Even after the episode is over, next episode and she helps delivering a baby, and still makes sure to look after Aang.

Sokka too testified that Katara did a lot of labor for him:

Sokka: Actually, in a way, I rely on [Katara's bossiness].

Toph: I don't understand.

Sokka: When our mom died, that was the hardest time in my life. Our family was a mess, but Katara, she had so much strength. She stepped up and took on so much responsibility. She helpwd fill the void that was left by our mom.

Toph: I guess I never thought about that.

And appropriately, Katara is the one doing the vast majority of the emotional labor in her relationships. She takes care everyone, comfrots them, and protects them. Take "The Deserter" as an example: Aang was being extremely careless with his new found fire bending ability, to the point where he accidently burns Katara's hands.

Katara herself never express her anger at him, she ends up healing her own wounds. Sokka does the scolding. A\ang felt incredibly guilty, but still – by the end, Katara is the one comfroting Aang when he wants to give up on fire bending.

Katara takes care of everyone in the Gaang, making sure they're well, helping them heal their scars. Moreover, Katara often brings up her own grief to empthize with other people's loss. It's a pattern of sorts:

1) A character talks about their past with the Fire Nation

Haru: Yeah. Problem is ... [Close-up, earthbends two stones in a circle above his hand.] the only way I can feel close to my father now is when I practice my bending. He taught me everything I know.

Jet: The Fire Nation killed my parents. I was only eight years old. That day changed me forever.

Hama: I'm sorry. It's too painful to talk about anymore.

2) Katara brings up her own grief, sympathizing with their loss

Katara (to Haru): See this necklace? My mother gave it to me.

Katara (to Jet): Sokka and I lost our mother to the Fire Nation.

Katara (to Hama): We completely understand. We lost our mother in a raid.

A\ang is a bit of an exception, given that she brought up her grief to prepare him for the loss of his people. (Ad they all respond sympathetically). Still, she brings it up to sympathize and help. There is nothing wrong with that, of course. but here is how it went with Zuko:

1) A character talks about their past with the Fire Nation

Katara: You have no idea what this war has put me through! Me personally! The Fire Nation took my mother away from me.

2) Katara brings up her own grief, sympathizing with their loss

Zuko: I'm sorry. That's something we have in common.

It's Zuko who responds to her grief this time. It's him empathizing with her. It's him doing the emotional labor for her. And it's this sympathy is their first real civil conversation, establishing that in their relationship, Zuko will do some of the labor needed of him.

In The Southern Raiders, Katara opens up to Zuko, compleyely unprompted, while she is yet to forgive him, about the precise events that led to her mother's death.

A thing she has never done with anyone, and is doing now with someone she considers untrust worthy. Zuko responds with "your mother was a brave women". She, once again, is on the reciving end of the emotional labor – and in a way that is deeper than any other intance of her in the show.

In rest of the episode, Zuko is the one thinking of her and taking care of her.

Exhibit A:

Exhibit B:

Exhibit C:

Katara takes care of everyone, but it is with Zuko that she recives the help she deserves.

She put herself in danger to help A\ang, she helpped him after he'd burnt her, and she stepped up when her mother died. But with Zuko, he is the one reaching out. He's the one taking care of her needs.

[dxliqhted]

stuffies: al haitham

al haitham x fem!reader, fluffy, suggestive (light).

you're putting your earrings on when you hear a muffled groan behind you, the sheets rustling as he buries himself deeper in them.

"you're leaving?" his voice deep with morning rasp, but somehow his words still manage to sound sad as he says them.

"i need to run some errands..it'll only be a little while." you say finally turning to see your boyfriend lying lazily on the bed, half of his body covered by the duvet while the rest exposed to the cold morning air of the house.

which is strange considering...it's al haitham you're talking about and he's usually up and about by this time.

the only time al haitham stays in like this is when he's on an extended break—the calendar didn't mark any breaks when you looked at it a moment ago.

suddenly his body bolts with a sneeze followed with another pained groan that had him holding his head as if trying to steady whatevers hurting in it.

you sit beside his body on the edge of the bed, your hand laying on his forehead to check his temperature, "baby.." he whines softly,

he's burning up. "haitham i think you're sick." your hand drifts down to cup his cheek once you see how he leans into your touch, "you'll stay with me if i say i am?" he asks, his eyes lidded tiredly, "i can't leave you sick here just moping in bed all day." you sigh, a tiny smile growing on his lips, "so you'll stay and keep me warm.." he's not asking anymore, he knows you will

you press a kiss on the tip of his nose, "yes but i still need to go and make a quick run to the market, get you medicine and some soup."

to your words he instantly frowns, "later...please?" he holds you put, his arm around your waist.

"al haitham."

he lets out what seems like a small whine as he lets his arm fall before rolling on to his stomach, his hand clutching your pillow close. he doesn't say anything but just grumbles something incoherent, you smile at his rare childishness, enjoying seeing this side of him.

...

"haitham you need to take them." you say perched again on the edge while he lays around like a king. he shakes his head, ignoring you as he remains on his stomach, your pillow is over his head now, shielding his eyes from the blaring hot sun entering from the window.

"please, you'll feel better after." you hold the hands with the small pill and water closer to him, and finally he looks at you, "you're staying after right?" there's something about al haitham like this that makes your heart melt too easily. his hair disheveled by sleep, his voice low and hoarse, his neediness.

"yes...i'm staying but only if you take them." you state,

he doesn't wait for you to finish when he's already grabbing the pill and the water, hastily drinking it down before placing the water on the nightstand and wrapping his arms around your body, dragging you down with him on the bed.

you yelp with the thud, his head instantly buried in your neck, soft kisses as he holds you close, mumbling a soft, "you can't go now...don't go..." against your skin,

"you're gonna get me sick too.." you sigh, closing your eyes, enojying his warmth, "good."

"good?" you try backing away to give him space but he refuses, his arms are ironed on you, "more cuddles...staying in bed with you." he smiles against your cheek before placing a small kiss on it, you can only sigh in a soft defeat.

not long after, he fell asleep on you, but if you moved even the slightest he would instantly be alert. instantly trying to stir you into sleep again with him, smothering you with more kisses and some light bites if he wanted to tease you (even when he's sick).

once he got better, if you brought it up he'd get beet red about it, dismissing it saying simply that he doesn't remember it so, therefore it didn't happen.

luckily for you, you have several photos to show him and kaveh as evidence.

©-dxliqhted ♡ please do not steal, modify, plagiarize or repost my works

[guardian5tiger3]

Waddup B) . Another general reading

Pick an album ! -

1 2

3 4

1. Ice cube group

In da house!! Haha I feel like y'all in da energy of being bout yo money. Or the color green is significant. Shoot y'all might be about the green rn if u kno . This doesn't have to be a super conscious thing a lot of you either way though are in the energy of richness like that so you gonna be attracting money or it's because you're destined to be prosperous at this time or in the near future like that. For some of you it's because you're supposed to use that to help get rid of some form of negativity in the past some how. Others of you should consider getting a new pet if that will make your heart happy you know or confirmation if that's what u been thinking bout. Spirit wants you to make sure you're open to receiving at this time and in the future though cause some of you have an imbalance were you're a bit too humble maybe struggling with your own worth and self perception and this is making me feel sad so I'm really sorry and you guys need to maybe use your logic to conclude it's only the truth that you're a human with a good heart that deserves good things and anyone who ever told you other wise..... Is tripping like they're wrong and delusional and probably a hurt person anyway. If your childhood was bad you're manifesting a lot to replace stuff from all that time and make up for it and stuff and you all are just heavily in a deep great energy I can see y'all auras are mostly either green , blue and a very few of you purple. One specific person has some red. Make sure you stay in touch with your feelings though as I can see how the world might be making you a bit numb or you feel like a bit depressed actually when it comes to the fact that things constantly happen like , in the past I've been depressed and contemplated like how could it be that I have to drink water then go to the bathroom over and over again and it would wear me down thinking about it. It's good to practice having control over your own mental and perspectives ok. Just hella green and gold so wealth wealth money $$ . One love

2. Group KORN !!

You guys are winners in my book . I don't even know why I felt I had to say that . If you actually listen to Korn, while either way you got to listen to their first two albums you know... After that they were cloned for sure just saying . Ok anyway ...

You might catch something right in time whatever that might mean. This could be anything it depends on the individual, someone saying something, something falling almost, idk.if that does happen it must also be a confirmation of something. So I'm seeing a complete ending and then a revival. This group is somehow dealing with the general concept of time ... I'm seeing for some of you this is all past energy some of you right now some of you the future this could even be like way in the future ok. So it just depends . Someone most likely am adult male is speaking well on you and possibly other people you care about or can be related to yourself. This is looking good for your reputation and it might even be saving your reputation. U know what for a few of you this could be someone that's catching something right on time that's what that is for you . Something about something working and smoothly at that, or a job or you working with someone . This could be someone you know from work. Looks like they love you like they have love for you and a lot of other people , this is someone with a good heart even if you can't tell by their personality . Something's " falling apart " I heard and someone's getting away smoothly from anything affecting them . There's an energy of some type of trick being played or more so just an attempt at that. Maybe some type of verbal communicative manipulation. Maybe trying to convince someone to do something they shouldn't like join a group, sign a contract, say something wrong or that can be taken out of context so be careful but I see it being a separate energy that just has no place anywhere and is kind of awkward lol. I got 3 7's . Be careful of deceit at this time and moving forward. Especially regarding people's words and your own. People might be analyzing you or someone else or a situation . I'm getting almost like an investigation for some of you maybe a real investigation . Like the feds even. Especially if by the time you're reading this this as an older post. Holy f*********** I picked up another deck started shuffling and a card that says I investigation popped right out and a little magnifying glass I drew it's also an orange card like I d***n near wanna take a picture and show you guys. Strangely the other card I got is cult

So this is super deep in some way some form of group of people, big or small, serious or silly, depends on who is reading, has attempted to silence someone. I'm guessing a great majority of you it's you that was or is trying to be silenced. I'm getting the metaphor... If you can call it that this isn't even a metaphor I just don't even know I'm kind of appalled cause what I'm getting is that like if you like just decided ok this one needs to go to another life not stay on earth you know so they took something away and try to deprive them of something so either that happens or so that they do not have the energy , capacity, capability of being able to speak the truth but guess what that's the desert card and after that I have the wave card so not just here's a glass of water let's throw you in the ocean and let a wave roll over you ... Metaphorically for whatever you were being deprived of...... And also a card that says break through which also has rain in it :) . So this is gonna hit really fast cause of course that's the universes will. It's kind of like actually a miracle type of energy im even getting the word biblical and also maybe the story of the guy who parted the red sea or together is significantly sorry I should remember his name I read the bible 300 times as a kid haha. But, you guys this is really good the final two cards are the ace of sword , y'all know that's the truth, and four of pentacles so I feel in my heart chakra specifically a sense of calm and that everything is gonna be set right and you'll be feeling good and a there's a good amount about stability. Maybe church is significant to someone. Or a house of worship I don't know. Or a house in general too for some of you. Or a bulldozer ..? Also substantial evidence for a very few of you .

3. No Doubt !!!!

You guys might be family oriented, live with your family, I can pick up on some people's energy of a kind of busy household maybe the sound of pets nails on a hard floor (cute I miss that with having dogs )

Do not drink any open drinks at this time whoever I'm talking to you wouldn't expect this either you trust someone who would do something or you wouldn't expect it of the brand...or something I don't know I don't want to make anyone paranoid just keep your drink on you in your sight or drink unopened ones you know . I can also sense baked chicken I think or grilled you know when it's not fried or anything though ?? You think someone is loyal to you also if you have a dog this is significant. Im getting calm energy somewhat I think spirits around you are in that and trying to stay around you and have that energy around you :) honestly someone around you might be dangerous this isn't a matter of you getting paranoid this would , if it is true for you, be a matter of you coming to terms with something you've probably had hints about for a prolonged period. Maybe since you were young or it's multiple people even for someone else that this also resonates for. Y'all feel really cool like you investigate things kind of like a mystery vibe it's dope . Rainy days and cabins maybe you can dig that or that's what you give other people if they can read energy well. The things you might be into or interested in in the past too might be significant and spirit considered it to have been or be technically research y'all are really smart don't let anyone block you or stop you from anything ? . For real. Yep y'all are super cool and a smaller group y'all might have anxiety or any big or small issue you should practice breathing exercises. You know I make tea and breath in the air when it's hot it also helps asthma or I placebo that for myself but either way it's nice haha. I'm feeling like my brains working faster you guys are really sharp you might also like caffeine lol me too. You guys are so dope you're like putting together a puzzle or intuitively trying to figure something out and you will this is kind of a destiny situation like I can feel in my heart you guys are just the dopest but seriously w really intelligent pile I feel that something is time restricted , destiny, everything youre supposed to get to and have happen and do and it feels super fast paced and so do you , even if u don't notice cause youre used to it. You also feel like you avoid really negative things as easily as a ghost can avoid a human. Better days a head too even. Your bed is significant somehow . One thing I'll note is you may have to, and if so should sooner than later deal with any negative ideas ever put in your mind about yourself make sure you heal your heart and mind . You're moving so damn fast . Your soul has a PLAN . Like, a mission dudes. It'll all make sense in the end I suppose. Keep going 💯💯💯

4 . The Maiden !!!!!

I feel like you guys have some good philosophy or mentalities in life like you know how to and when to go with the flow. Like picture floating down a river and it's to chill out then you're like alright now I gotta get up and out cause there's a rock that will hit me in three feet. Your intuition might make stuff easier . Sometimes your intuition might surprise you or it would if you pay attention you know. You may get a bit frustrated because you don't get to straight up know the future lol I can relate. To. That.

The movie ice age might have something to do with something or if you remember watching it at any point maybe the memory is significant??,

Or someone you remember watching it with for someone. The universe wants to give you what you want and need but you already seem like a generally content soul just with like yourself existing I noticed from the start this is a super chill group . You guys definitely see danger before it comes. Breathing exercises to the point of deep relaxation might be helpful. You're just not supposed to consciously know the future though I'm not sure why but I guess it would technically like by law mess it up possibly . Remember to be calm , at peace when doing any form of work but also remember work is play deep down just like deep down we're still the kids we once were when we were young , which is a good way to realize every person is not so different and I was going to say also that you should maybe focus somewhat on your relations with other people and your social interactions. Just to sharpen your social skills I guess. There looks like there's chaos around you but I don't see it touching you so you're good . Mellow vibes just enjoy the moment and work on patience and stuff maybe. Working would be beneficial you might get joy out of that even if it's building something or it could even be playing in the woods, going to the store, but I am also getting to go play outside and they want me to say like play like you could go pick up a stick and start digging in the dirt hell kinda sounds like fun . Peace and rock on .

[number1mingyustan]

Just in Case ☾

bestfriend!seungkwan x fem!reader

Warnings: kissing, cursing, explicit smut, marking, mentions of cheating, protected sex, riding, mentions of oral (f.)

Summary: It was always gonna be you

Word Count: 2.9k

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(a/n: i really meant it when i said I was planning to be more active. school is still kicking my ass and I've been so unmotived to write I'm sorry. i still have a bunch of unfinished drafts but there's no telling when I'll actually finish them)

You first met Seungkwan in December 2019.

You’d gone out to the club and accidentally spilled your drink on him. In a drunken panic you tried to help, but only ended up making the situation worse and staining his clothes.

However, he didn’t get upset. He just chuckled and told you it was fine and joked about how it wasn’t his best shirt anyway.

You offered to buy him another drink to make up for it, but he politely declined and made another joke about how you’d only end up spilling it on him again.

You apologized again and went your separate ways thinking it would be the last time you saw each other. But of course, fate has a weird way of bringing people together.

Less than 4 hours later he would find you, sneaking out of his roommate's room in his apartment with your dress on backwards.

It wasn’t unusual for Jeonghan to bring a girl home, but he never could have expected it to be the clumsy girl who spilled a drink on him just a few hours prior.

Jeonghan was the first to leave the club with you and Seungkwan went back home later that night with Seokmin.

He got up to get a glass of water before going to sleep and you were there, tiptoeing around his apartment and trying to go unnoticed.

You were doing a horrible job at being quiet, but luckily Jeonghan was a heavy sleeper. Such a heavy sleepover that he didn’t realize you and Seungkwan spent the entire night talking.

Conversation came naturally to you. He was shocked initially, to say the least. But he said one thing to you and the conversation ended up lasting for hours leading into the morning.

There was something so familiar about you. It felt like you’d known each other your entire lives and you could talk so easily. You talked about any and everything together like old friends catching up.

When Jeonghan finally woke up and saw you in the kitchen chatting it up with one of his housemates, he’d assumed you’d woken up just before him. Even now it remains a secret between the two of you that you never slept that night.

Since that day, Boo Seungkwan has been your best friend.

After that night, he invited you to roller skating after finding out it was something you both enjoyed. The two of you hung out more and more over time and you were eventually adopted into the friend group.

You got comfortable with all of them, Joshua, Jihoon, Seokmin, Seungkwan, and even Jeonghan. Despite the very one time hookup, you still consider Jeonghan to now be one of your best friends.

But you’ve always been closest with Seungkwan.

————

“We’re gonna get so fucked up!” You scream to Seungkwan over the loud music in the club.

He shouts back at you in agreement before taking your hand in his. He drags you through the crowd, navigating like an expert and ensuring that you stay close to him.

You make your way to the bar and order your drinks. The bartender is nice, but a little flirty. You can admit he's cute, but he's a little touchy and you're not really feeling him all that much.

Seungkwan can sense your discomfort and nearly startles you when he touches your waist. As soon as you realize it's your best friend, you melt into his touch and all your discomfort has dissolved.

"Sorry," he says. "Didn't mean to scare you. I just wanted him to get the message."

You nod. "I understand, thank you." You smile.

You both down your drinks easily and continue with your night out. You spend the new few hours dancing and singing along to the generic club music. Your best friend stays close to you and he looks out for you like he always does.

"You don't have to stay attached to me all night you know, it's your first night out as a single man in a while." You bump your shoulder against his playfully. "I don't wanna scare off any opportunities for you to meet someone."

"You know I didn't come here looking for anything," He gives you a soft smile.

"That doesn't mean you can't find something," You muse, raising an eyebrow.

He takes a sip from his drink. "Thanks, but no thanks. Let's just have fun tonight."

You shrug, bumping your glass against his before downing the rest of your drink.

The next few hours were spent dancing, laughing and drinking. It was nice to see your best friend let loose again, but the night eventually came to an end and he ordered an uber.

The ride was quiet, but not uncomfortable. The two of you sat leaned against one another in the backseat. The ambiance was comforting, set by the music playing quietly from the radio and the lights from the city surrounding you.

You two enter his apartment together and you immediately throw yourself onto the couch with a sigh of satisfaction. Your eyes fall shut and a smile appears on your face. "My feet were killing me."

Seungkwan crouches down in front of you wordlessly and helps you take off your shoes. You thank him quietly and he disappears into his bedroom.

When your eyes flutter open, he's re-entering the living room with something in hand.

"Here," He hands you a t-shirt of his. "So you don't have to stay in that dress either."

You mouth a 'thank you' before stumbling into the bathroom to change out of your clothes.

"You know," You plop down on the couch next to him. "You still haven't told me why you guys ended things.

Seungkwan sighs. "I know. It's nothing though, don't worry about it. Things just weren't working out, you know?"

"Yeah, it's a shame."

"You didn't even like her," Seungkwan chuckles.

"That's only because she didn't like me first!" You defend. "Never even understood that."

"She was just... nevermind. Doesn't matter now."

"No," You sit up and frown. "Tell me."

He sighs. "She was just kind of jealous of you. Ended up driving the whole relationship into the ground."

A beat.

"You guys broke up because of..me?"

Seungkwan leans his back against the couch. "Like not really... but yeah."

You frown. "Why would you do that?"

"You already knew she didn't like you Y/n."

"Yeah, but you ended a two-year-long relationship. What the hell?"

"Things just weren't working out."

"Yeah... because of me!" You sigh.

"You didn't do anything. She was just jealous and insecure. You ended up being the topic of conversation way more than needed and it was so frustrating. It was a constant argument for those two years and I got exhausted."

"I knew she didn't like me, but I didn't know it was that serious. I feel guilty as hell now, like I ruined your entire relationship."

"You didn't."

"But I did," You frown.

"Do you know how exhausting it was? For two years I had to put up with her turning everything into an argument about you. I was constantly being accused of something and then I'd have to be reassuring her and coddling her like a baby. It was like a never-ending cycle about the same thing Y/n. I could only do that so much before I lose my mind."

You frown. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be, you didn't do anything wrong." He pats your head softly. "Seriously."

"I know I just... feel bad. I feel like I compromised your happiness" You pout.

"You could never. You're my best friend." He gives you a reassuring smile.

He rises to his feet.

"I'm getting tired, are you ready for bed?"

You remain silent, giving him a small nod. About 10 minutes later you find yourself laying in bed next to him. The lights are dim, but you can still make out the features of his face clearly.

You don't know why your heart is suddenly beating so fast. It's so quiet in the room that he just might be able to hear it.

"What's wrong?" He asks.

"Huh?" You mumble. "Nothing."

"You know you can't lie to me," he grins.

"I don't know," You sigh. "You just feel so like... close right now. I don't know."

"Oh," He breathes out. "Do you want me to take the couch? It's never been an issue before."

"No!" You say a little louder than intended. "No," Your voice softens. "I just... what you told me earlier about Hayeon. Like, what if she's right?"

"That there's something romantic between us? I'm not sure I understand you Y/n."

"I mean, you just said it yourself. It's never been a problem for us to sleep in the same bed, but isn't that kind of weird? Like you and I have always been close... but maybe this is too close?"

"I think you're drunk and still hung up on my stuff with Hayeon.

"You're drunk too," You frown.

"Yeah, but I'm not speaking a bunch of nonsense right now." He pushes your hair out of your face softly. "Go to sleep Y/n."

"No," You protest.

"Y/n–"

You weren't really thinking when you kissed him. It just sort of... happened. Granted, he wasn't really thinking when he kissed you back either.

It felt so natural, like you were kissing a lover of 10 years. it was easy to melt into his touch, everything was just so easy with him. Your hands are in his hair, tugging lightly at the blue-tinted strands atop his head.

You let out a soft moan against his lips, pressing your body against his.

You feel like you're floating and drowning all at the same time. Floating on a cloud of bliss while simultaneously drowning deeper and deeper in him.

He pulls away, breathless with swollen lips. You both lay on your side, staring at one another. Neither of you really know what to say. Your heart is still beating out of your chest as you lick your lips slowly, relishing in the lingering taste of him.

"What the hell Y/n?"

"I'm sorry! I don't know," You panic, covering your face in embarrassment.

He sighs, falling onto his back. "Why did you do that?"

"It's not like we've never kissed before."

"Yeah, but not like that. The worst I've ever done with you was barely a peck. That was different."

"You felt it too?"

"What?"

You fall silent. There's a million things running through your head and they're all circling back to him.

"I don't know!"

"That's not a good enough answer.

"That's not fair to me," he frowns.

"Of course I have," he huffs out. "From the very first moment I met you, you made me feel something. It's been what, 5 years? When you left the bar that night, I couldn't stop thinking about you. I was convinced I'd never see you again. And then I did! Yeah you had just fucked my roommate and it was somewhat heart breaking, but from the moment I met you I knew I wanted you in my life. You were just... I don't know. You were shining a little brighter than anyone else in that club. You've got an aura about you that's hard to ignore."

You sit there, completely speechless.

"I know that I felt something for you since that night. I don't know if it really ever went away. I know I loved Hayeon when I was with her, I'm not saying I didn't. I don't know if I've been ignoring what I've felt for you, or if I really did get over it. But you suddenly deciding this now is confusing for me." He frowns.

For the second time that night, you act before thinking yet again. Your lips are on his and you find yourself melting into his touch. He kisses you back, pulling your body on top of his.

You don't know what you're doing or why you're really doing it, but it feels good. It feels right, like it's something you know you won't regret even though it may be confusing.

You straddle his lap and his hands rest comfortable on your lower back. His kisses are addictive, leaving you breathless with a fuzzy head.

You pull away to catch your breath, staring down at him with lust in your eyes. Wordlessly, you feel his shirt off your body and toss it onto the ground.

His eyes go wide and his breath gets caught in his throat. "Are you sure?"

"Never been so sure in my life. I want this... if you do too," you breathe out.

"Course I want this," He responds.

He pulls you back down and reconnects your lips with fervent passion. You grind yourself against him slowly, body moving on its own accord with his.

You tug at his shirt lightly and he breaks the kiss again to pull it off of his body.

"Shit," You breathe out. "Do you have any condoms?"

He nods. "In the drawer."

You reach over to his nightstand and open the drawer. You fish out the small gold package and tear it open with your teeth.

"You know, it's not safe to do that." he muses. "Could poke a hole or something."

"Oh well," You smirk, disposing of the gold packaging. "Maybe you'll just have to knock me up."

He raises an eyebrow at your statement. "Knock you up? But you're my best friend."

You let out a scoff and lean back, rolling the latex on his length. "Don't think.." You lift your hips, slowly sinking down onto him. You wince at the initial feeling. "Don't think I'd be on top of you like this if I was just your best friend."

He breathes out, tilting his head back into the pillow. His nails dig into your hips as he feels himself stretching you out.

You both let out a gasp as you start grinding down on him slowly. He holds you steady by your hips as you start to pick up your pace. you tilt your head back, gripping onto the sheets for support.

"Shit," he breathes out.

Your breathing grows heavier and you find yourself getting lost in the pleasure. It feels so good, so right. It's not fully processing in your head that you're riding your best friend right now.

"Should've done this sooner," You mumble to yourself.

Seungkwan can only nod in agreement. He's in awe watching as you bounce on his cock. The room is still dimly lit, but there's just enough moonlight seeping between the blinds for him to see how gorgeous you are.

He wants this image of you forever etched in his brain. He slides one of his hands from your hip to your inner thigh. Your pace is disrupted when you feel his thumb pressed against your clit.

"Oh fuck," You curse out.

He smirks to himself as he picks but the pace with his finger. You match his movements, falling back into your rhythm as ride him. He leans back deeper into the bed and pushes his hips up to meet you halfway.

His cock now brushes deep inside of you, hitting the same spot that has you struggling to stay quiet. Your nails are digging deeper into his bedsheets and you're whining out loud.

His thumb draws quick circles on your clit and his eyes never leave your frame. He watches you bounce on his cock, filling yourself up and cry out his name.

Fuck. He really regrets not doing this sooner.

He knows he won't last much longer. The intimacy and pleasure of it all is too intense. He applies more pressure on your sensitive bud, causing you to moan louder.

"Close," You warn him breathlessly.

He sits up on the bed, pulling your frame closer against his. His head falls into the crook of your neck. He sucks on your skin, nibbling softly and ensuring he marks you. He knows he might regret this in the morning, but he can't help himself. He has you now and he can't help but want a little reminder.

Moments later you're falling apart in his lap. You gasp your air pathetically as your hips lose rhythm and you tighten around his cock. He's losing his fucking mind.

You squeeze around him, driving him into his own orgasm and milking him for everything he's got. He groans into your skin as he spills his load into the condom.

Both your chests rise and fall against one another as you tap back into your senses. He places one last kiss on your cheek before he lifts you off his lap and lays you on the bed. He disposes of the condom and lays down next to you.

The room falls silent and neither of you is really sure what you should say.

You break the silence. "Now what?"

He shrugs.

"I feel like, like we need to talk about this."

"We should."

"Okay.... so.." You start.

He shushes you lightly, placing a finger on your lips. "Later."

You blink at him slowly. “What?”

He ignores you, pulling you in by the legs. “Later.”

“Is now a bad time?” Your voice is filled with confusion.

"No, it’s just you know…," he strokes your arm softly. "If we wake up tomorrow and decide this isn't for the better, I want to have at least had a taste."

You eyes go wide.

He smirks at you, pulling your body closer to his. "Just in case, y'know?"

You bite your lower lip, meeting his suggestive gaze.

"Yeah," You lean into his touch, allowing him to pin you down on the bed. "Just in case."

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© number1mingyustan - Do not repost without permission.

[mythicmanuscripts]

Okay, the person who sent the vampire ask awakened something in me, because all my faves from HOTD fit at least one trope of vampire romance/erotica.

We've already established pretty boy Aegon (as usual, love that for him).

I totally agree that Aemond fits in the vampire role (I mean, look at his aesthetic. Boy's right at home there), where he's smitten with a human and refuses to acknowledge that he was basically stalking them at the beginning, until said human calls him out and shows no fear of him, they're just pissed off. And that does it, he's down even worse than he already was.

I feel Daemon and Rhaenyra would also fit vampire roles, with Daemon being the one who turned Rhaenyra, and she took to being a vampire like a fish to water. I think they'd be the type that has several "partners" they feed from, on a somewhat regular basis, but they also enjoy "hunting" every now and again, Daemon especially. They don't kill anyone, but they do enjoy the fear they can feel from the person they're feeding from.

Then One human shows up that seems immune to both Daemon's charms, and threaths, and Rhaenyra is living for it, she's having the time of her life watching him being flustered. And that's how they end up with a regular partner, not just in the feeding sense.

And of course, our boy Jace. I just feel like he would be such a good fit for an ingenue kinda trope? Noble birth, slightly sheltered, intelligent as hell, maybe too curious for his own good. He stumbles upon a vampire feeding on someone, nearly killing them, and ends up conflicted when he finds out the person was a reprehensible sort of criminal (like, heavy shit, type of criminal). And he keeps seeking the vampire out, even after being turned away because he's a stranger at that point, they don't trust him.

But he's relentless, and gets himself into trouble, and the vampire saves him, and he's head over heels for them.

TRULY INCREDIBLE THOUGHTS HERE OH MY GOD?? Anon I love you.

I'm gonna write a little bit about each of these ideas and then we can go from there! All ideas in this AU will be tagged with 'supranational!au' so block that if you don't want to see this or search it to see everything thus far :))

-------------------------------

AEGON:

Okay I know this anon didnt even mention much about him but I must briefly discuss pretty boy Aegon!!! Pretty boy Aegon who just absolutely ADORES the vampire who fucked his brains out that one time and now he's obsessed.

Everyone else thinks you're absolutely terrifying, and for good reason, but does Aegon care? No absolutely not. In fact, he gets rid of his personal kings guard and just has you instead. The kings guard can patrol the keep and stand watch outside his quarters but none of them even get close to him anymore because he's got a vampire behind him at all times.

And just one more quick thing about Aegon: originally you don't intend to only drink from Aegon because you don't want to put that much pressure on him and risk harming him. Aegon, however, is very possessive and will be very unhappy if you feed from another.

AEMOND:

Absolutely love the idea that Aemond essentially stalked someone for a solid two weeks without even knowing. Even better if you actually knew he was following you. He's not exactly subtle about it, especially because if he's standing behind you then anyone in front of you will look utterly terrified.

The way that you interact with him without fear just gets him completely hooked and yeah you just have a vampire following you around now.

Also, I kinda love the idea that Aemond actually doesn't seem capable of being the same level dangerous and skilled when he's around you? It's like he gets your scent or your attention or lord help him your blood and he just... brain off. No more Aemond.

DAEMON AND RHAENYRA:

Okay I LOVE this idea and I can't believe I never considered this concept with them. I definitely agree Daemon would have changed Rhaenya and then hunt together regularly. They're absolutely a couple that would love to fuck whoever they're feeding from at the same time.

I think Rhaenyra would be interested in you first. She'd sport you and have a conversation with you and discover that he really likes talking to you (and complaining about every single member of her small council because of course). You only meet Daemon about a week later, maybe when Rhaenyra invites you to dinner with them. Of course she had told Daemon all about you, and Daemon was certainly excited thinking they'd get a good feed and bed partner out of this.

To Daemon's dismay and Rhaenyra's delight, you don't even react to any of Daemon's attempts at flirting and seduction. You just listen to him and smile, but don't seem flustered at all.

Originally Rhaenyra had hoped to bed you with Daemon that night, but now that she's watching how worked up Daemon is becoming and how good you are at handling him? Well she's more than happy to have a front row seat to your interactions with Daemon.

For the next 3 weeks Daemon is adamant that they will never bring you into their bed, not for sex or for a feed or for both. Rhaenyra just nods and smiles to herself becasue she knows with absolute certainty that you absolutely will end up in bed with them. If Daemon truly didnt want to fuck you then he wouldnt still be talking about you weeks later.

The very first sexual thing to happen is you and Rhaenyra fucking while Daemon can only watch. He had finally made one too many ridiculous comments and so you put him in his place.

And so, Rhaenyra gets to sleep with you and drink from you while all her husband may do is watched. Eventually when you're satisfied with Daemon's punishment, you allow him to come join you two in bed. He ends up drinking from you while Rhaenyra strokes him.

The last thing he says before he falls asleep is to mumble, "We are never letting you out of this bed"

JACAERYS:

Absolutely love the thought of Jace just sort of stumping into a vampire. Maybe he was in a dodgy part of town? Like maybe he had been dragged out by Aegon but then Aegon abandoned him and now he has no idea where he is. It's while he's wandering around trying to find his way that he finds you.

You're feeding when he sees you, and as much as you want to just ignore him, he's far too pretty and far too scared for that. I think he'd run away at first, and you cant figure out why you did this, but you run after him. And it's damn good that you did becasue you find him being cornered by some people who clearly want to mug him.

Needless to say none of them made it to first light. Once they've all been dealt with, you look at Jace and he is just in awe. You escort him back to the red keep and think that's that.

Except no of course it's not Jace is desperate to find you again, and so maybe... maybe he goes back to that very dodgy area, just wandering around on his own and trying to spot you.

[bucky-bucket-barnes]

more! headcanons! please!

bucky getting used to modern crap headcanon

considering Bucky is over 100 years old, your boyfriend is more with the times than people give him credit for

socially he's quite progressive, but a lot of other things, he tends to be fuzzy on

food for starters

that man acts like he is scared of any other seasonings besides salt and pepper

"doll, you barely touched your dinner, are you upset?" / "i already told you im not eating boiled chicken :)" / "well now i'm upset :')"

the first time you took him to mcdonalds, you thought he was going to black out

"why does the soDA HURT" / "told you not to order the sprite" / "it's sprite, it's not supposed to feel like i'm drinking engine fuel"

also, tech. he was also very bad at tech

"yeah, so i have my bluetooth-" / "you have a what?" / ". . .bluetooth headphones" / "are you. . . do we need to go to a hospital?" / "bucky what are you talking about" / "your tooth is blue and you're talking to me like i'm the crazy one" / "did you miss the headphones part"

also the dishwasher for some reason?

you thought it was sweet that he always insisted on washing the dishes until you realized he had an ulterior motive

it was when you caught him rewashing the plates you tossed in the washer that you said something

"buck, i already washed those :)" / "i knew this day would come :'|" / "what?" / "it's the dishwasher" / "is there something wrong with it?" / "i just don't get it" / "explain" / "people throw anything in these things, i'm not cleaning my dishes in that" / "baby, it's safe-" / "want to know what else is dishwasher safe? dildos! i don't want sex water on my pasta- stop laughing i'm being serious."

okay, most of the time it led to funny situations so it was fine

like that one week where bucky would end every text with a picture of a heart until you explained to him what emojis were

or that other time he tried to secretly order you flowers while on a mission using his phone

bucky accidentally ordered a dozen bouquets of roses instead of twelve dozen roses

he tried to play it off like it was on purpose, but you knew by his confused look when the third bouquet showed up that he had fucked up

the best, though, was when peter showed him twitter

he was as fascinated as he was confused

"honey, do you think i'm babygirl?" / (choking on water noises) / "well, stevesnipple on twitter said sometimes a grown man is babygirl. am i?" / ". . .yeah, honey" / "fuckin' knew it, sam's gonna be so jealous"

or that time he kept using the word stan wrong

"i stan you ;)" / "im begging you to stop saying words you don't know how to use, that is the cringiest thing you have ever said" / "is being a super fan of my girlfriend a crime now? blocked and canceled" / "omG"

or that time he kept using tea in inappropriate situations

"and after that, i lost my arm :(" / "babe, i'm so sorry-" / "and that's the tea :,("

okay, so a lot of shit confused him, but he didn't mind

he thought it was a great excuse to ask you for help without sounding needy so you two could just hang out <3

[xoxoavenger]

Running Like Water

pairing: JJ Maybank x Fem!Reader

summary: 'Cause I knew you/Steppin' on the last train/Marked me like a bloodstain, I/I knew you/Tried to change the ending/Peter losing Wendy, I/I knew you/Leavin' like a father/Running like water, I/And when you are young, they assume you know nothing

word count: 1477

cardigan masterlist main masterlist

When Y/N wakes up, she's sure the fuzzy memory of JJ going to Australia must be a dream her drunk brain conjured up. She doesn't remember anything after she threw up, but she sits up and looks around the still-dark room. There's two beds in the room including the one she's on. She realizes that Sarah is next to her, Kiara on her other side. Pope and John B are in the other bed, but JJ is no where to be found. She coughs, which makes her feel nauseas. Her headache comes crashing down, and she winces as she grips her head. Her mouth feels dryer than the desert.

"Here," She jumps as she turns back to Kiara, who is now awake and holding a water bottle. Y/N takes it gratefully, finishing the whole bottle as Sarah stirs awake.

"Hey," She smiles, but there's something else in the smile. Y/N frowns.

"What happened last night?" Y/N asks. She knew they weren't supposed to get a hotel room, but she does remember John B and Sarah being pretty drunk and she threw up, so it's probably a god thing that they ended up in one.

"How much do you remember?" Kiara whispers, the boys still not awake.

"Not much after the last bar. I know I thew up." She looks around once more. "Where's JJ?" She turns to see Sarah, who's never been able to hide her emotions well, looking upset.

"At the last bar, John B accidentally told everyone that JJ got a job in Australia." Sarah says softly. Y/N blinks.

"It wasn't just a dream," She mutters, barely audible. She pushes the covers off her and crawls to the end of the bed, jumping off.

"Y/N," Kiara calls, waking the boys. Y/N doesn't listen, just opens the door and walks out into the corridor.

"Where are you going?" Sarah follows, genuinely scared for Y/N, or maybe more for JJ if she's able to find him. She doesn't answer, which causes Sarah and Kiara to exchange a look, still following. "Y/N!" She turned around like this, the others skidding to a stop.

"I might kill him."

"No," Kiara started, not letting Y/N get the rest out. "I know that he's a dick. I know that you're upset, which is completely valid. But I think that killing him may be a little over dramatic."

"I think I'm being the exact right amount of dramatic considering the circumstance." Y/N had the crazy eyes going on, scaring John B and Pope, who had heard the noise and came out of the hotel room. "And killing him is the exact right amount."

"Wow, okay." Pope says, not sure what to do in this situation.

"I'm sure he had a reason, so maybe we should let him explain." John B suggests, but this only makes Y/N more angry.

"Maybe he should have explained when he told me." Y/N shrugged, turning back around. "Oh, that's right, he didn't!" She walks around the corner, and this time no one follows him.

"She's not actually gonna kill him, right?" Pope asks, genuinely unsure.

"Honestly?" Sarah turns to the rest of them. "I'm not sure."

~

Y/N finds JJ back at the Chateau. He's drinking a bottle of tequila, no ice or even a glass, just straight out of the bottle. She thinks briefly about punching him, but decides against it at the last moment.

"I want to kill you." She says honestly, trying to keep herself from shaking in rage.

"That makes two of us." She leans forward and hits him for that one, slapping him across the face and making him drop the bottle. "I deserved that."

"You deserve more than just that." She spits, anger apparent in every syllable.

"And you deserve more than just me." He whispers, putting his head in his hands.

"Jayj," She says softly, getting on her knees. She's still upset, but her anger is moving to sadness quickly. "Why didn't you just tell me when you found out? Why didn't you tell me when you were applying?" She's never been this mad at him while still being upset with him.

"I knew you'd be upset." He shrugs, leaning his head back. "And I didn't think I'd get it. So when I did, I knew you would be upset but tell me to go and I didn't want to be the reason you were upset."

"When do you leave?"

"Two days." They stare at each other in silence, neither knowing what to say. She would think about hitting him if she weren't so shocked.

"So you were just not going to tell me until you left?" She doesn't need him to confirm it, she knows he wasn't going to tell her.

"I didn't want to hurt you. That's why I held off." He wasn't quite sure what she wanted. He knew it wasn't what he was saying, but he couldn't make this better.

"But you told John B and Pope." She raised her eyebrows. "I'm more mad you kept it from me. It honestly feels like you're running away from me." She lets out a sardonic chuckle.

"I knew you'd be upset, but I thought you'd be happy for me! Ya know, as my girlfriend!" He yells, standing up. She steps back a bit.

"You are running away." She whispers, tears springing to her eyes. "Why are you running away?" She doesn't understand. She thought everything had been going good.

"I have never been even out of the state! I need to experience the world! This is the best job I'll probably ever have the chance to have." He can't tell her the truth, can't tell her that he feels things for her that he's just a little afraid of.

"You're running away!" She repeats as she gets closer, tears falling down her cheeks without her even having to blink. "You're doing the same thing your dad did." She whispers. He wishes she had slapped him again. It would have hurt less.

"This isn't the same." He tells her lowly. She shakes her head.

"It is. It's exactly the same because you're leaving your problems behind. You're leaving me behind." She wants to scream and cry and figure out how to get all her emotions out.

"I'm sorry." He can't lie to her. He can't tell her exactly why he's leaving but he can't lie to her.

"I'm sure you are." She mutters softly, wiping her tears. "And so am I." She walks out the door, JJ following her.

"Why are you sorry?" He calls, running down the stairs as she speeds over to her car.

"I'm sorry to myself. I'm sorry I let myself lean on you so much. I'm sorry I put myself in the position to get hurt." She turns to him and shakes her head. "I'm sorry I let myself fall in love with you." She gets in her car, letting him watch her drive off.

~

She goest back to the Chateau two days later, after disappearing from her friends. When she walks through the door late in the afternoon, everyone is sitting around as if they're waiting for her.

"He's gone?" She asks, slumping.

"Yeah," Sarah says softly as Kiara stands to go to her side.

"He left." She whispers, head rolling back as her knees collapse underneath her. John B jumps to help Kiara hold their friend up.

"It's alright," Kiara comforts as they set her on the vacated couch, pushing her hair back. Y/N is sweating and shaking, and Kiara realizes her forehead is warm. "I think she's sick."

"Shit," Pope mutters, putting a hand to his head.

"Have you eaten anything?" Sarah whispers to Y/N as she crouches down. Y/N opens her eyes, but she doesn't quite look coherent. "It must've taken everything to get here." The four of them stand there, looking at their friend who had been heartbroken down to the bone.

"They're not going to survive this." Kiara mutters. They had seen JJ before he left, had noticed how he was always drunk and upset and barely made it onto his flight.

"He had to do it." John B told them. "He had to leave to see how good he had it. He had to leave and hope that she takes him back when he comes back home."

"That makes no sense." Sarah said, crossing her arms. "He ran away."

"Because he's in love and he's scared." Pope explains.

"They've already said 'I love you'. It's not that." Kiara looks over to see Y/N asleep, so she puts the blanket up on her.

"She wants to get married." John B said. The way he said it, everyone knew that JJ had told him.

"And that scared him." Kiara understood now. They all knew their friend had issues with commitment, but they thought he had gotten through them with Y/N. "He ran."

"Shit," Pope repeated, and they all silently agreed. 

//

tags: @avada-kedavra-bitch-187  @one-sweet-gubler @theoraekenslover

[chyckles]

Love deficit

━ A Dean Winchester one-shot

━ Pairings: dean winchester x fem!reader

━ Summary: Where you get drunk and end up in front of Dean's door.

━ Words: 3.2k

━ Warnings: alcohol, the reader is drunk (nothing happens while she's drunk, Dean's not a creep), use of y/n, cursing I think, mentions of an abusive past relationship (the abusive person speaks with the reader on the phone), a little suggestive at the end, my bad English (I'm from Spain and suck at grammar). Please, let me know if I missed anything

masterlist

It wasn’t the best day of your life, but it wasn’t bad either. Until he called you.

You didn’t know it was him, you wouldn't have picked up the phone if you knew it.

“Y/n” You hear his voice. And suddenly all you have constructed, all the walls you have constructed around you, they all fall down… He’s there, speaking to you again “Y/n, answer to me, baby”

‘Baby’ you hate how that sounds on his lips now. You will hate that word forever.

“Baby, we have to talk” he continues talking “We have to talk about what happened, if only you would give me another chance… I will make it up to you, I swear”

You still don't answer, the words can’t leave your mouth, and you feel your eyes begin to water.

“Baby, I’m sorry. You know that wasn’t me, right? I would never hurt you” his words are sweet, he’s trying to get to you like he did in the past “I regret everything that happened, everything. I just want us to be together again, like the good old times, you know? Henry and y/n against the world. Baby, just say something, I miss you”

“I…”

“There she is, my pretty baby. C’mon, you know our fate is to be together. What happened… it was just a mistake”

“A mistake? You call hitting me a mistake?” you can’t help the words spilling out of your mouth.

“Yes, a mistake, a stupid mistake”

“Just leave me alone, okay?” you say, and hang up the phone. But the damage was already done. You’ve heard his voice again, you’ve heard him call you ‘baby’ again. He’s getting in your head, and the worst thing is that for a moment, you did consider getting back with him. Because after all, after all he did to you… a part of your heart would always want him.

So you decided that the best way to forget about him, about that voice, was to go to a bar and stuff yourself with drinks. You’re not usually like that, you can count with the fingers of your hand the moments that you’ve drinked alcohol in your life, and all of them were for happiest reasons.

Now you’re drunk. Sad and drunk.

And that’s how you end up in the door of Dean Winchester’s room. Because he’s the only person you can trust in a moment like this, in a state like this. With your mind troubled like it is and your senses not at your best, he’s the only person who could give you the comfort you need.

So you knock on his door, wishing it wasn’t this late, so you didn’t have to wake him up.

He, of course, is there in a moment. Your drunk mind can’t help but admire his beautiful face and his strong body. Maybe it don’t have to do with the drinking, you also admire him when you’re sober.

“Y/n? What, it’s like two in the morning? What are you-?” he stops when he smells the alcohol “You’ve been drinking?” he sounds amused, you’re not usually like this. But deep down, he’s worried.

“Hmm” is all you say, and extend your arms in the air, like waiting for him to hold or grab you.

“What is it, darling? You’ve gone too far with the drinks?” he teases you with a smile, admiring you from a distance.

“Shut up” you groan.

“Hmm, so cute when you’re mad” he says with a smile, then grabs your hand and starts to pull you.

"Where are we going?" you stumble over your words.

“Just follow me” he leads you to the living room, and sits you down on one of the sofas “C’mon, now you’re gonna tell me what happened. Why are you drunk?” the teasing is gone, now his worried side is the dominant one.

"It's not important, it's stupid"

“C’mon, you wouldn’t have gotten drunk if it wasn’t important. You know you can tell me anything, it’s just me” he reassures you with a smile.

You swallow nervously, but finally say the truth in a whisper:

“Henry called me”

Every playful behavior Dean still had on him evaporates. His body goes stone-still and his jaw clenches. You look at him with guilt, like if it was your fault.

“When did he call you?” he asks in a grunt.

"A few hours ago" you answer "I'm not sure, I don't even know which hour we're in"

“What did he say?” his voice is merely a murmur.

"He wanted... he wanted to ask for forgiveness"

"For what? Did he say for what?"

"No, he just... said he was sorry, that he missed me"

“Well, he’s lying” the words let go of him as another grunt. He can't hide his anger any longer, the veins on his hands and neck visibly tensing.

"I know" you whisper "But I just... couldn't bear hearing his voice again, had to drink to forget it" you admit with guilt

He nods, he’s not mad at you, he understands you. He leans towards you, trying to steady his tone, to make it softer, even though he’s still mad as hell.

“Did you talk to him?”

“Yes” you whisper, embarrassed. You look down, not wanting to see his disappointed face.

He leans in even closer to you.

“What more did he say?”

"He asked me to be with him again" 

“And what did you tell him?”

"I told him to leave me alone"

He nods, proud of you “That’s good”

He then looks to the ground, his jaw clenching.

“Dean? Are you mad?” you ask, worried, embarrassed.

You can see him swallowing the lump in his throat “Yes, mad at him”

“Not at me?” you ask, your eyes glazed.

"No, no… Never at you. God, never at you" he says,and his hand travels to your cheek, caressing it with care. Then a thought crosses his mind: “You didn’t think about getting back with him, did you?”

"I..." you look down "It's not easy to forget" 

His hand goes back to his lap after hearing this. You feel his rage, his anger, his hands starting to tremble with the tension. You notice it and hold one of his hands.

“I’m sorry” you whisper.

“It’s okay, don’t be sorry” he says, your touching soothing him “Just… promise me you would never let him back into your life…” he looks at you seriously.

“I promise” you say after a few seconds of silence "Just… just if you promise me that you're not letting me alone"

“I promise” he says, the anger leaving his system after hearing your words.

You then fall into a strange silence, it isn’t uncomfortable, but it isn’t comfortable either.

Your drunk mind makes you dizzy, and you finally whisper: "Can you... can you hold me? Just for a moment?" Maybe it makes you braver too.

Dean moves instinctively, putting his arms around you. He pulls you close to his chest.

"I'm sorry for worrying you" you murmur against his chest.

"I know. It's okay" he replies, his voice now soft and gentle.

"Thank you, Dean" you whisper, and in your drunken state, you don't think when you let out: "I love you"

You feel his heart skip a beat, his hands tighten around you as he brings you closer...

"... what did you say?"

"Hmm?" you seem confused, but then repeat "I said I love you" you're drunk mind can't comprehend the power of those words.

His entire body freezes, but you don’t seem to notice. Instead, you let out a yawn.

He shifts, bringing you closer to his chest, moving his hand up to the back of your head, and caressing your hair.

He buries his face into the back of your neck, breathing in your scent, and as he does, he lets out the deepest sigh you've ever heard.

"I think I need to go to bed now" you say softly, yawning again.

"I'll carry you" he whispers.

"What a gentleman" you half joke with a drunk smile “But I can walk, thank you”

You both stand up and start to make your way towards your bedroom. He lays against the door-frame, making sure that you make your way safe to the bed.

“Good night” he says when he sees that you’re safe now. He’s turning around when he hears your voice:

"Can you sleep with me?" you whisper before he exits the room "I don't want to be alone" In a normal state, you'll be blushing like crazy upon saying those words, but your drunk state does something to your confidence.

He stares down at you, as you're laying on your back, your eyes half-closed as you watch him.

"You... you want me to stay?" He asks softly, leaning in closer to you.

"Mhm" you say, half asleep.

He sighs and nods. He lays down next to you. He’s unsure, should he cuddle you? But you answer that for him, you turn away from him and say:

“Hug me” So he does as you say, he spoons you.

"Go to sleep. I'll be right here" Dean whispers, kissing your hair.

You smile and finally get the sleep that you deserve.

The next morning, you wake up to find Dean wrapped around you on your bed.

You are lying on your side, and his arm is wrapped around you tightly, his face buried in the back of your neck. His body feels warm and comfortable.

It is like a dream, but a dream that is slowly becoming more real with each passing moment.

What happened yesterday? You can't remember almost anything, the only thing occupying your mind right now is the pain of the hangover.

You try to think of what you may have spoken about, what you may have said, but the haze of the alcohol isn't quite gone yet.

You smile though, feeling Dean’s closeness. Even with the pain in your head, you can still enjoy when the man of your dreams is hugging you.

You let out a contented sigh as you slowly stretch your muscles.

And suddenly, it hits you. You're alone in bed with Dean Winchester.

You just wish the alcohol didn’t make you make a fool of yourself yesterday. You start to panic. It's like your memories are slowly coming back to you, but you can’t put the pieces together, like a very messy and difficult puzzle.You sigh, and suddenly feel Dean moving, waking up.

"Hmm...." he murmurs, in a low, sleepy voice. His body starts to shift slightly.

You don't say anything, waiting for him to fully wake up

He's shifting a little bit in his sleep, until he wakes up slowly. 

“Good morning”

"Morning" you whisper back.

You feel Dean's body shift again, moving a little bit closer to you, as he wraps his arm around you even tighter.

"What... What happened yesterday?" you ask, embarrassed "Did I... did I say something?"

A smirk plays on his lips.

"Something, yes" he replies softly. "You said a lot of things."

Your face turns warm with embarrassment, and you turn around in his arms to look at him "Like what?"

He raises an eyebrow, the smile only growing.

"You told me you loved me."

You feel your face warming up like crazy. You don't know what to say, or what to do, or where to look.

His hand travels to your warm cheek.

"Did you... mean it?"

"I... I was drunk... I probably didn't know what I was saying or doing" you try to lie, and fail completely at it.

He continues smiling.

"Maybe you were drunk..." he says, teasing "But were you lying?"

"I..." Your mind is racing miles per hour, trying to look for an excuse. But then it hits you: he has stayed with you this night, maybe because he feels the same way about you?

"Just answer me this, as honest as you can be: did you mean it?"

"Yes" you finally let out in a sigh

In a second, he flips you around until you're now laying on your back.

You can feel the warmth his body irradiates. You feel safe and sound there, but also embarrassed, how could you be so stupid to let out that you love him?

"Why did you stay the night?" you ask softly.

He smiles.

"Do you really need an answer?" He asks, his eyes gazing into yours. "And here, I was thinking it was obvious...."

"I need to hear it"

His face is so close he could just kiss you if he wanted "It's because I love you too" he whispers softly. 

Your breath catches as you hear those last three words, those eight letters.

And just like that, in one motion, he closes his eyes and pulls you into a kiss. It takes you by surprise, but it’s a sweet kiss.

Your hands travel to his hair, pulling him closer towards you.

This is everything you've ever wanted in him. The warmth of his body, the softness of his touch. The closeness, the companionship. The vulnerability, the trust.

You sigh against his lips, content. You pull away from him slowly, and look in his eyes. His breathing is slow and heavy, but he's still smiling at you.

You can't help but chuckle out of pure joy. His smile widens when he hears you laugh.

"Happy?" he whispers, his breath hot and his body pressed against yours.

"Yeah" you whisper back.

“Good” he replies.

His body relaxes fully against yours, his breath slowing down.

"You have no idea... the things I've felt for you" he whispers “Every time I looked at you, I imagined just pulling you into my arms. Imagined kissing you. Imagined loving you”

“Dean…” you whisper, your eyes becoming moisty.

“Shh, don’t cry, don’t say anything, just listen to me”

“But I just… I feel like I don’t deserve you” 

"You deserve this and more" he replies softly "You are brave. And intelligent. And thoughtful and warm and beautiful and… I just love you so damn much, y/n”

You're starting to feel overwhelmed with all the love you're suddenly receiving, you're not used to it.

"I just... nobody has ever loved me this much. Nobody" Not your family, and definitely not Henry.

"I'm sorry" he whispers, not sure what else to say "I'm sorry you haven't been feeling loved. That changes today, though. I’m gonna make you feel like the most loved woman in the world”

You smile, feeling already like the luckiest woman "You really mean it?"

He nods.

You smile and you can't help a tear streaming down your face, it just feels so overwhelming, to be this loved... in a good way, of course.

"Don't cry..." He whispers, using his thumb to wipe away the tear from your cheek.

You sigh, content like you have never feel before "Kiss me again, please, Dean"

The words are barely out of your mouth, and he's already leaning in and planting his lips on yours, gently yet firmly.

"Thank you" you whisper.

"For what?" he replies softly.

"For making me feel loved”

"It's my pleasure" he whispers "I finally feel like everything I've ever desired has come true. You are mine and I am yours, and nothing else matters."

"Nothing else matters" you can't help but whisper the Metallica song with a silly laugh.

You see the corners of his mouth turn into a smile.

"You're a bit of a goof, aren't you?" he sighs.

"Hmm" you sigh, still laughing.

"I like it." he replies, and his body moves lower so that he's now lying directly on top of you.

"Hmm, do you?" You feel your heart full of love. Henry used to tell you that you were stupid when you made comments like that.

“I love it” he confess “It’s adorable”

"I'm not adorable" you pat him on the arm, embarrassed.

“You kinda are. But it's alright. That just makes you cuter. I love the fact that you think you're a tough hunter, but in reality, you're adorable."

You frown "I could kick your ass if I wanted to"

He can’t help but laugh at that.

"I'd like to see you try, I'm sure that your cute little hands and tiny fingers could totally beat me" he says sarcastically.

You narrow your eyes and then push him so he's no longer on top of you. Instead, you flip you both over and end up on top of him, with your legs on either side of him. You catch him off-guard, and instead of fighting back, he chuckles softly and wraps his arms around you.

"Do you really think that you're stronger than me?" he says with humor.

You narrow your eyes "A fight isn't always about strength, you should now that"

"Yeah, you're right" he smiles, and your head is now resting against his chest while his arms are wrapped around you "You have to be smart, too. But I still think that I would probably beat you up" he adds teasingly.

"Not a chance" you refute "You're too rough"

"Maybe that's why I'd win. Because I'm rough and tough and wild. You're... fragile. Easily breakable. Your skin is soft and delicate, and while it's beautiful, it doesn't make for a good body for fighting."

"But I'm smarter, and faster. You wouldn't have a chance" you say, enjoying the banter.

"And yet, you're also shorter, and lighter. I could pick you up and toss you around like a doll" he replies with a smirk.

"You couldn't catch me" you assure.

"I'm pretty sure I could" he replies, smirking.

He slides down a little so that his hands are resting on your lower back and ass, his fingers gripping lightly into the soft fabric of your pants, caressing your lower back, moving slightly lower.

"Keep dreaming" you say, enjoying his touch.

"Oh, are you challenging me?" he asks, his tone full of humor.

His fingers keep moving, caressing your spine, and he leans in so that both his hands are resting on your ass now, as his eyes look into yours, full of teasing and humor.

You narrow your eyes "Mhm, and I still think I'll win"

"I think my hands are winning right now," he replies.

You continue narrowing your eyes "I could defeat you just with a kiss"

"Oh yeah?" he asks, "Do you really think your kiss would be that powerful in getting me to submit?"

"Mhm, wanna try it?"

"Alright then" he whispers "But I won't surrender. Let's see this... amazing kiss of yours."

You smile and approach him slowly, and then capture his lips with hunger. Your tongue entering his mouth causes him to shiver in surprise and pleasure. His body becomes weak with the sensation.

You continue the kiss for a little longer, enjoying the feeling of having him under your control. You lose yourself in the moment, and you don't even know how long you continue kissing, and how much time has passed.

When you finally break the kiss, he lets out a soft moan, and you can't help but just look at him with hungry eyes.

"Well?" you ask him.

"I give up" he whispers, giving in to the moment as he leans in again, capturing your lips with his once more. You sigh and now simply enjoy the kiss.

He does as well, allowing the kiss to continue for a long moment, before he finally pulls away. 

“That was fun” you smile.

"Mhm" he nods, as his breath calms down. 

[just-a-sewer-goblin]

Bully

Bully!Soap x gn!reader (college/highsool whatever au)

It's the last evening you're all together and you can't wait to leave it all behind. Your bully finds you one last time and his intentions are not what you expected

Hurt no comfort, reader getting closure (kinda?)

Warning: Soap is an asshole in this,I'm sorry y'all

Finally it’s over. You’ll be free come morning. Free of classes and professors and classmates and most of all free of bullies. You can do what you want and wherever you’ll end up, it will be a completely new chapter in your life.

You just have to get through this one evening. Honestly you considered not coming to the graduation party, you didn’t really have a connection to anyone anyway. But you came to the conclusion that it would be a nice way to say goodbye to these four years of hell.

You pushed through, you did it and after this evening you won’t have to see any of these spawns of hell ever again. You haven’t had this much peace of mind in a long time. The certainty of things finally being done makes you feel more confident so you don’t really glance up when John fucking MacTavish decides to join you.

What he could want now, on the last evening of all of you seeing each other, eludes you. Maybe he wants to get on your nerves one last time. Bully you one last time but suddenly you don’t even care. Let him be an ass, you won’t have to see his irritating face ever again come morning.

“Hey, ugly. Surprised you decided to show your face here. Can’t be that anyone invited you.”

He’s smirking down at you with that annoying, cocky smirk that makes so many girls swoon. You don’t even look up at him, leaning back on the steps leading down to the backyard of whoever’s house this is. You take another sip of your drink.

“Still haven’t found your voice after all these years, huh, mutt.”, he continues to goad you and finally you look up at him, meeting his eyes.

It’s really sad, that he’s so pretty, such a pretty shell for so much ugly personality. “What do you want MacTavish.”, you ask, almost bored.

He seems taken aback by your lack of reaction to him. But he finds his grin immediately again. “Ohhh look at the little mutt being all grown up and not being scared of me, anymore.”

He sits down next to you, leaning into your space and you lean away from him, the railing behind you keeping you from falling back. “Don’t forget what I can do to you.”, he whispers almost threateningly and suddenly you laugh. He flinches back from the unexpected sound.

Your laugh is easy and carefree, your eyes sparkling with honest mirth as you look into his eyes. Your laugh steals his breath. He’s never seen you laugh like this and it throws him off. God he didn’t know you’d sound so pretty, even though he imagined making you laugh like this more times than he can count.

“Yeah?”, you ask still giggling. “What are you gonna do? There’s no lockers here for you to lock me into. What are you gonna do? Trip me? Pull my hair? Rip my clothes? Drag me to the bathroom and lock me in there? Tell everyone here that “little ugly” came to the party to ruin everyone’s view?”

You relax against the banister behind you gaze still locked on him and he opens and closes his mouth once before leaning in again: “No, I’ll give you what you’ve wanted from me all these years.”

Suddenly your mouth is dry as he puts his broad warm hand on your thigh. Your eyes meet his, big, like a deer caught in the headlight and suddenly everything makes sense. The way he’d pick on you, his flushed face when he spilled water over you and your shirt got see-through. The way he’d call you ugly because you can see it in his eyes, he thinks you’re anything but ugly.

He gently starts letting his hand wander to your inner thigh where it begins to drag upwards and you reflexively close your thighs, trapping his hand, preventing him from travelling higher. You leave his hand there and lean in too so your lips are next to his ear.

“And what do I want from you, MacTavish?”, you don’t miss the way he shudders when he feels your breath on his skin. His hand grips your thigh tighter.

“You want me to touch you, have since the first day, where I bumped into you on accident and made you drop your books. Ever since then I couldn’t get you out of my head, the way you’d looked up at me from where you gathered your stuff. Wanted to see that face over and over again. That’s why you never rand from me, mutt, you wanted me to bully you, to make you feel all helpless and small. And now I’ll finally give you the bullying you wanted from me.”, he murmurs to you and maybe if it were still that first interaction he just recounted you’d react with goosebumps.

Instead you grab his wrist when he tries to move his hand again and rip it off of you. You laugh again and he leans back looking at you, shocked at the surprisingly cold sound.

You shove his hand against his chest and pat his cheek condescendingly and harder than he should allow. “No, Johnny. I didn’t run because there was no where you didn’t find me. You’re an asshole to think I’d want you after everything.”

His eyes are wide and you see cracks in his façade for the first time. “But you’re obviously attracted to me.”, he almost splutters and you grin and stand up.

“Sorry MacTavish, no body and face could ever be attractive enough to cover the stench of your rotten personality.”, you say pleasantly, brushing off invisible dust from your thighs. Or maybe you’re brushing away the reminder of his touch.

Johnny can’t believe what’s happening. He was so sure of it. He’d get to have you today, after three years of making you look at him with those adorable tearful eyes, you’d allow him to make you all glassy eyed for a different reason. And he’d be so good, so much better than you’d expect, that you’d ask for his number and he’d get to keep you as his nice little pet dog. He’d get to bully you like he’s always done just with an added layer of pleasure.

“Darling, please. Let me explain.” He hates how whiny his voice suddenly sounds, the petname slipping out subconsciously.

“I hope you have a nice rest of your life, MacTavish. I’m outta here. Nothing here for me to miss. I hope I never see you again.”, you say, then turn and wave over your shoulder.

“Please. Stay.”, his voice is thin and why the hell is he the one that sounds like a pathetic dog now?

You don’t spare him another glance as you leave, missing the way he’s the one with glossy eyes for once.

[talaok]

Hey, I have this huge exam next week, it’s the biggest exam of my life so far and I’m stressed af. I consider myself a chill person but I’m feeling beyond anxious all the time and I have never felt this stressed in my life. It’s so hard to take care of myself rn like I don’t feel like eating but I have to because I’m nauseous and then I can’t find anything I’d like to eat and it makes me more anxious IT’S A VICIOUS CYCLE I SWEAR AND APPARENTLY I HAVE TO EAT EVERY FOUR HOURS EVERY DAY BC I’M A HUMAN??

anyway, sorry for oversharing. I was gonna ask if you could write sth with pedro taking care of stressed reader, making sure she eats and is hydrated, filing up her coffee, cuddling with her when she has crying sessions wiping her tears and telling her everything’s gonna be okay and he’s gonna be there for her with every step no matter what. I literally crave comfort right now, and I’d be so grateful if you could write something 🥹

I love how caring and kind you are with asks, thank you so so so much for being here. Love you 💕💕💕💕

pairing: Pedro pascal x reader

a/n: Im so so sorry love, im one hundred percent sure youll do great, but in the meantime, i hope this will make you feel a little bit better, love you💗💗 (this ask did skip the line bc if i posted it two weeks from now it wouldn't have made any sense)

He didn't know how or when, but all of a sudden, all you did was study.

And at first, he didn't really think anything of it, you'd told him about the exam and about how important it was, so he understood, but what he didn't expect, was just how much you'd be studying.

You raised your head only to answer him, and even when you did, it was monosyllabic.

"Have you eaten anything?"

"no"

"did you drink any water today?"

"not really"

And no matter how many times he'd tell you how bad for you that was, the next time he asked, the answers were always the same. And that's exactly why by the second day, he had stopped asking and instead, started doing.

He had conceived a whole plan of attack.

For the days when he, unfortunately, had to go to work, he left two full water bottles and a glass on your desk, and an already cooked lunch in the fridge, so that all you needed to do was heat it up in the microwave.

But on the days when he didn't have to go to work, he took it upon himself to become your personal assistant, and your worst nightmare altogether.

No matter how much you complained, he forced you to take a break at least every two hours, he made sure you were drinking the water he poured into your glass, he made you coffee every time you asked, (always only after having reminded you that you didn't need more coffee but more sleep) and finally, he cooked or ordered all of your favorite foods in the hopes that it would make you feel more like eating (which never seemed to work).

Today, thankfully, he got to stay home, so for the thousand time, he walked into the studio to check in on you.

"hey there" he smiled, watching you half-heartedly wave at him before returning your full attention to your book "I brought you a snack," he said, placing the apple slices on your desk and making a soft laugh flee your mouth.

He had turned into a soccer mom, but god it felt good to hear you laugh again.

He got behind you to start gently massaging what he was sure must have been sore shoulders.

"how's it going?"

"bad" you grumbled, relaxing the tiniest bit at his touch

"I'm sorry" he murmured, leaning down to kiss the crown of your head "you wanna take a break?"

"It's not been two hours yet"

"I know, but I think it would be good for you" he explained "We could take a walk maybe"

You sighed, closing your eyes "I can't"

"sweetheart" he cooed, crouching down to be at your level and turning your chair towards him "you're gonna burn yourself out if you continue like this"

"I know but..." you glanced back at your notes "I can't fail this exam"

"and you're not gonna" he immediately reassured you

He watched something happen behind your eyes, 

"not if I keep taking breaks"

"baby-" he murmured, taking your hand in his and watching as your mouth curved downwards for the quickest moment 

"I just-I'm so anxious," you said, your voice breaking "I-I can't fail- I just can't"

"hey hey hey" he cooed, his eyes looking for yours "Sweetheart, it's ok"

And that was the moment you couldn't hold it anymore, all the stress and fear you'd been bottling up for days started spilling from your eyes.

"n-no it's not, I-I... I don't even know, I just..." you sobbed, and when you looked at him, he swore he heard his heart break " I feel like shit"

"sugar..." he murmured, wasting no time wrapping his arms around you "I'm so sorry baby," he spoke gently to your ear as his hands stroked your hair and back 

You hid your face in his chest as you cried all you had to cry.

"it's all gonna be alright sweetheart, I promise"

But at that, for some reason, you only started to cry harder.

"ok this is it, hold onto me"

And you had just the time to frown, before he had picked you up and walked out of the room and into the living room.

"w-what are you doing?"

"forcing you to take a break"

"I could have walked" A small smile appeared on your lips, and with it, a small wave of relief washed over Pedro's body.

"You've done enough today" he explained, sitting down on the couch with you, and in less than a moment, your whole body had clung to his.

Your left leg was draped over his, and your head was on his chest, as he held you close with both his arms.

"y/n, you're not gonna fail" he started gently "You're the smartest person I've ever met"

"That's not true" you muttered, your words muffled by his body

"yes it is" he insisted "And baby I promise you, that everything is gonna be alright" he swore, slowly running a hand through your hair "and that no matter what, I'm gonna be here for you, ok?"

It took a moment for you to respond, but after a few beats of silence, a muffled "ok" made its way to Pedro's ears.

"yeah?" he asked, again, encouraging you to meet his gaze.

"yeah" you sniffled, as you finally looked up

"Feeling better?"

"yes" you nodded "Thank you"

He tightened his hug, as he bent down, to ghost your mouth "I love you baby" he kissed you "Whatever you need, I'm always gonna be here for you"

[xmasterofmunsonx]

Now That We Don’t Talk

Pairing: Steve Harrington x reader + Eddie Munson x reader (ex!Steve mostly)

Not for minors: includes drinking, language, mention of death of family members, etc. not for your eyes if you're under 18, please.

Word count: 13.5k (yikes !)

Author's note: One shot I've been sitting with this one since 1989 TV was released. I'm not 100% on this, but after reading and reading and editing even more, I think it's perfect and as best as I’m going to get. The pacing seems similar to the song, it gets quicker as it goes on, and has a nice abrupt ending. I hope you enjoy it, this one means a lot to me because I’ve put so much time and thought into it. I really thought the quick pacing at the end would ruin it, but like I said I wanted to mirror the quickness of the song. Totally open to some smaller one shots from this ~*universe*~ to elaborate more on any of the years or moments. I’d actually love that if anyone was interested in requesting anything 🩷

“You went to a party, I heard from everybody, you part the crowd like the Red Sea, don’t even get me started. Did you get anxious though, on the way home? I guess I'll never, ever know… now that we don't talk”

Summer 1987

You sighed, kicking your feet at the water in the pool. Your best friend Robin sat beside you, you both were sipping beers you’d practically been nursing all night at this house party you knew you’d have to drive your boyfriend home from. It was your last summer in Hawkins- hopefully forever.

Last spring you’d lost your mom in the “earthquake” of ‘86, and Robin’s family had taken you in until you figured out your plan. You were both reminiscing over the past year living together, and the previous years of the cursed things you and your group of friends had been through in Hawkins and the upside down- the losses, and the victories. Through all of it you’d been on and off with Steve after he’d dropped Nancy- you had her to thank for that one. You’d always had a thing for Steve, ever since middle school, but he only had eyes for Nancy and you knew you never stood a chance. It wasn’t until they broke up, you helped Steve’s wounded heart and then you two became a couple.

You fell in love quick- who wouldn’t? Steve was beautiful, and he was an absolute dream of a boyfriend. Minus the baggage of his stuck up family who hadn’t taken to you so kindly. You two had decided that moving together out of Hawkins would be the best thing for both of you, to leave the memories and nightmares behind, and start a new life somewhere.

You knew Steve was inside of the party, likely hanging out with his “friends,” drunk out of his mind like usual at these. For once he wasn’t hosting, this was a house equally as nice as his, but was some girl’s house from his senior year- but he was still, as always, the life of the party. You looked out across the yard to see that Nancy was rocking in a wooden swing in the back corner of the yard beside Jonathan and Eddie.

“I can’t believe he can still drink like this.” You finished off your beer, crushing the can beside you on the cold concrete surrounding the pool.

“Me neither. He’s doing okay?” Robin’s voice was laced with concern.

“Yeah. I mean, considering… he’s got his good days and bad days, but don’t we all?” Truth be told, Steve had kind of turned into a little bit of a mess. But everyone knew it, and you were all there for each other when you needed extra support.

“I just worry he’s gonna have a breakdown when he gets out of here and he actually has to work for things, aren’t you?” Robin spoke, and the thought had crossed your mind too, but you always seemed to push it out of your head.

“We’ve got everything lined up, thanks to good ole Harrington money.” You chuckled, annoyed but also a little thankful for the fact that he was still supported by his parents, equally just as shitty as they were absent from his life.

“Speaking of, have you laid eyes on him lately?” You checked the gold watch on your arm that had been a Christmas present last year, initials engraved into the inside of the dainty band around your wrist. You realized it had been quite some time since you’d seen him, but that wasn’t unlike him at a party this size. You would tend to be found outside away from everyone, and he would be inside seeking attention from everyone after a few beer.

“Been a minute, I’ll go check on him.” You stood to get up, but felt a hand pulling you up in assistance as your legs climbed out of the warm water of the pool.

“Better come with you, I gotta pee anyway.” Eddie suddenly appeared by your side. You two entered the party, tossing empty cans into the trash can in the crowded kitchen. “Hey, uh…” Eddie stepped in front of you. “Maybe let’s get some fresh air first?”

“Quit being weird, I need to make sure he’s not passed out somewhere already.” You tried to shove past him, but he wasn’t letting you by. “And fresh air? We were just outside.”

“Listen sweetheart, I don’t think-” his voice was deep, and quiet as he gently placed his hands on your shoulders.

“Eddie.” You stamped your foot like a child at your friend. “Move. I’ve seen him really fucking drunk before, we leave in a week, and I knew it was going to be bad tonight, but I can take care of him.” You peered around his frame, seeing what looked like a clear path parting in the sea of people.

It was all leading to your boyfriend Steve, with another girl sitting on his lap. The girl who just so happened to be hosting this party, a brown glass bottle on the coffee table pointed directly at where Steve sat on the couch.

Not only was this girl on top of him, but they were going at each other like feral animals in front of everyone at this party. You stood there, speechless as you watched. Her hands were pulling him in closer by his brown hair, the hair that you loved to absentmindedly play with, and his hands were splayed out across her back and you watched as they slid down to her ass, pulling her into him.

The chatter of the party, hoots and hollers by the shitty old jocks that peaked in high school had stopped, as did your heart as you felt it crumble in front of you. Everyone had realized you’d walked in the room except Steve himself.

“C’mon, I’ll get you home-” Eddie guided you backwards, but you shoved him forward.

“I don’t have a fucking home, Eddie!” You didn’t care who heard you. “HE was my home. How stupid was I to think that Steve fucking Harrington was my home, and we were supposed to start a new one together and leave this godforsaken, cursed, upside down town behind?! But that’s not happening now, is it, STEVE?!” You were screaming at this point. The girl straddling Steve was wiping lipstick and spit off of her face as she smirked at you, and Steve was horrified as he looked at you.

“Honey-” he started, using your favorite name for you that now made you feel more sour than sweet, as he pushed the girl off of his lap and made his way to you, you could see his dick was half hard in his too tight pants, “-it was just a game of spin the bottle, we-”

You kneed him in the balls and walked over to the girl who was still smirking as if making out with Steve was some accomplishment. “You can have him.” you told her as you ran out the front door of the gigantic house.

You had never felt so small. Steve always made you feel small, everything he had was big, but never did he make you feel this small. His house, new cars, big family events- when you only ever had your mom. And now, you didn’t even have her.

You heard the door slam behind you and you assumed it was Eddie, “Eddie, I’m fine to drive home.”

“I-I can’t leave Hawkins.” The voice clamored out.

You turned to see your coward of a boyfriend, well, ex-boyfriend now, “What did you say?”

“I can’t leave.” He ran a stupidly large hand through his stupidly gorgeous hair. “I was going to tell you tomorrow, my parents told me that if I go, I’m cut off forever. Like, from everything.” He gestured in front of him as if he was showing you some grand image of his future.

“And? You decided to make me look like a fucking fool at a party, days before we’re leaving? How long have you known?”

“Just a few weeks.” He said as if it were nothing, as if it meant nothing to him.

“A few weeks, Steve?! You didn’t think you could tell me sooner? All of my shit is packed into boxes- fuck, you’re the one who helped me! And now you made me look like a goddamn idiot in front of everyone, which makes me want to leave even more now but I can’t! Steve, we’ve been planning this for months.”

“I’m really fucking drunk, and she climbed in my lap, and-“ he was slurring his words as he approached you.

“Bullshit, my friend.” Eddie had appeared out of nowhere, yet again. He placed his hand on your shoulder to gently push his way in front of you to keep you out of Steve’s line of sight. “I saw it through the sliding glass doors. You held your hand out like some type of a goddamn gentleman and welcomed her onto your lap like it was a golden throne.” His hands wildly waved in the air as he spoke. “Steve, you’ll never know what it’s like to lose everything. You’re too fucking scared to leave mommy and daddy’s silver platter of life they’ve handed you.” It was true- Steve had everything handed to him, and you knew Eddie had lost so much in his life like you had.

“What, so you’re just gonna turn on me like that, man?” Steve walked up to Eddie like he was intimidating, but Eddie never waivered.

“What am I supposed to do, man?” He mocked. “Nancy, Jonathan, and I all saw it. As soon as I saw she was getting up from the pool to come inside I tried to slow down what was happening so at least she didn’t have to see it, just hear about it, but your dick brain just kept on making out with her.”

You interrupted the boys bickering. “We’re done, Steve. I don’t care how drunk you are, it’s not an excuse. You knew that was fucked up, and we are done. Between that in there, and you being too much of a pushover to your parents, I can’t do this anymore. You can pick your shit up from Robin’s front porch in the morning. I’m still leaving.” You stomped past him to your car, not giving a single fuck about how anyone was getting home that night who depended on you. You knew they’d understand. And for all you knew, Steve had another bed already lined up for tonight.

“Baby, baby. Please. Stay so we can talk and figure this out-” Steve was practically pleading with you.

“There’s no more figuring this out, Steve. We’re done.” You tossed the gold watch onto the dewy grass outside of the window of your car, and drove off.

“You grew your hair long, you got new icons, and from the outside, it looks like you're tryin' lives on. I miss the old ways, you didn't have to change, but I guess I don't have a say… now that we don't talk”

Fall 1988

It had been over a year since you’d been back in Hawkins, and had it not been for Robin’s birthday, you might have gone another year. Or more.

You pulled up to the familiar house that was your home for a short while, to be greeted by her parents with big hugs.

“How’s the big city?” They both asked as they grabbed your bags from you.

“It’s uh, Chicago is a lot different. But it’s good.” You smiled. You were doing great for yourself and had managed to swing a job at a venue/bar that more than enough covered bills, and you had been promoted to a manager position that you proved yourself perfect for once you started bringing in bands that you made commission off ticket sales. “Keeps me busy, that’s why it’s been so hard to get back home. But I couldn’t miss my best friend’s birthday, so here I am!”

“Your bed is already made, so stay as long as you want to. Or can, whichever. Robin’s upstairs getting ready.” You thanked them and skipped up the stairs to her room, the door cracked open and you could hear her on the phone mumbling and then saying goodbye as you chose to open the door.

“Wow, you look-” she turned around with a grin on her face as she saw you appear in her doorway.

“Tired? Old?” You laughed at yourself.

“Hot.” She looked you up and down, and you guess you’d changed your look some since you moved. You leaned more into the style you wanted to in the freedom of your new city, adorning your skin with a few of the tattoos you had always wanted, wearing darker and edgier clothes. There weren’t as many judgmental eyes like you’d been under in Hawkins, especially like when you were dating Steve.

“Thanks. You look the same, but more… you. But of course, not a day older.” You hugged your friend and kissed her on the cheek. “So what are the plans for tonight? Dinner, then…?”

“Dinner, then Hideout? Eddie’s playing a show tonight and it’s almost sold out.” She stated as she finished up her lipstick.

“What?!” Your jaw dropped, you’d kept in touch with almost everyone, including him, but he’d completely left that out of his phone calls updating you on his life. “Sold out? I mean, they’re good but-”

“He just got signed by a small label in uh, in Chicago. So everyone is really excited, it’s kind of a big deal show for them.”

“What?! Why wouldn’t he tell me that?!” You and Eddie had regular phone calls- they had become weekly, sometimes a few times a week just to catch up with each other.

“Don’t tell him I told you, he really wanted to tell you tonight but you know I can’t keep a secret, so I had to tell you before dinner. Also, Steve-is-coming. So the show is basically their congratulations on signing, and my birthday dinner is how we got you back here to celebrate both. Because we knew you wouldn’t come back for any other reason.” Robin couldn’t have talked any faster than she was, and once you realized everything she had said, your stomach sank.

“That’s fine, I kind of expected that he’d be there. I know you guys are still friends.” You’d gotten over Steve- sort of. The guys in Chicago were hotter- way hotter, and you were meeting plenty of distractions to take your mind off of how Steve had broken your heart. You just… hadn’t talked to him in over a year. You knew very little about what was going on with him except for the fact that he was following in his dad’s footsteps, and you didn’t really care to know much more than that either. “Just promise you’ll sit beside me at dinner.”

“Got you covered. That was Eddie on the phone, he’s gonna sit on one side of you, and I’ll sit on the other. Steve is bringing his girlfriend since he’s back home for the show, too.”

“Is it…”

“Yeah, it’s her.” Robin looked sad as she admitted the truth. “Don’t worry. You look way hotter than her, and you’re not a shit person. Steve’s here like once a month anyway just to see her, so-”

“What do you mean by he’s here once a month?”

“He moved to Indianapolis, his dad got him a job there like last fall? I think? It wasn’t long after you left. And he comes home all the time to visit her since she’s finishing out college here.”

“Oh, so he can move to a big city as long as he’s got a big time girlfriend back home? Nice logic.” You rolled your eyes as you two made your way to your car.

Enzo’s was the only nice restaurant in Hawkins, and it had survived the “earthquake,” so they were still in their original location in the center of town. The big booth had been reserved for your group of friends and you were actually buzzing with a little bit of excitement to see them.

“Hi!!” Nancy peeked around the booth, and you stood up to hug her and Jonathan, and they slid back into their spots.

“Damn, look at you!” Eddie held you at arms length with his Cheshire Cat grin on his face before he pulled you in for a hug, and you wrapped your arms tight around him.

“Look what the cat dragged in.” You bickered back at him. You lightly threw a punch to his bicep, “I heard we’re gonna be neighbors?”

“You told her?!” His big brown eyes looked to Robin, who shrugged, as you three slid into the round booth, leaving two spaces on the other side for Steve and his date.

“Can’t keep a secret! You know me!” Robin shouted over you at Eddie as you watched his face turn a light shade of pink.

You patted his leg resting by yours, “I’m really happy for you. If you need a place to play, I know someone that can hook you up, you know that?”

“I mean, I wasn’t gonna ask but-” You let out a chuckle at Eddie’s bashfulness that hadn’t changed one bit. You knew the guy in charge of booking bands would trust you to do anything at this point, so he would definitely get Eddie on the regular schedule to get more buzz going for him.

“I only have one other person to run that by, and I’ve got him wrapped around my finger. Don’t worry about it.” You felt his hand drop down to yours with a squeeze, at the same time Steve was walking up to the table. You took in his looks- his hair had grown longer, his choice of dress that had once relaxed was cleaned up more than ever. “Where’s your date? Or did you think this was a business meeting?”

Everyone held in chuckles as you roasted Steve’s attire and he looked at you with no semblance of a laugh.

“Robin said Enzo’s, so I dressed nice!” He defended himself as he sat down.

“Oh that’s right, daddy still buys your wardrobe too, so you probably didn’t have anything else to wear.”

“Hey, hey.” Eddie leaned in to whisper in your ear, hand still atop of yours, “Let up on him. This is Robin’s birthday. Now, at my show, you can tear him to shreds.” He winked at you as he leaned back into his seat, not letting his grip go.

Dinner went as expected, actually better, you were all laughing and joking like you hadn’t been absent the entire last year. You avoided Steve’s gaze all night, focusing on anyone else who was talking, and you looked at your food when he spoke up.

A small cake was brought out for Robin, and all of you sang happy birthday with smiles on your faces as Eddie put on a complete show for everyone in the restaurant, for which he received applause for. He was never one to care about what anyone thought of him, but it still surprised you he had the confidence to be so loud in such a nice setting.

“Separate or together?” The waitress came around after everyone had finished their meals and cake.

Steve reached for his wallet, “I’ve got everyone.”

“No, I’ll get mine.” You reached for your wallet, but a familiar hand stopped you.

“I’ll get the two of us, and he can get everyone else.” Eddie spoke, handing the waitress cash. The table was awkwardly silent.

“Smoke?” You asked him, and he gladly nodded his head, and you forced Robin to get up, so you two could go outside for a moment. “So what was that check thing about?” You held your cigarette to your lips, and Eddie leaned in with his zippo to light yours for you before he lit his.

“Just wanted to remind him what an ass he can be sometimes. You smoke now, big city?”

“Comes with the territory, I guess.” You rolled your eyes and laughed as you both smoked half of your cigarettes on the quiet sidewalk. You stared down at some of the repaved concrete and traced the cracks where the old met the new. “When are you and the guys moving?”

“Well, I was going to ask you. So Robin must have left out that the label kinda… only signed me. Like just me, and they’re setting me up with a band. So I’ve gotta be there as soon as possible to sit in on auditions and-” he was absentmindedly scratching his head as he was talking 90 miles a minute.

“What? Only you? What about the rest of the guys?”

“They’re actually pretty cool with it. They don’t want to move or anything, they want to stay here. I think they’re too afraid to leave their families after everything, and-”

“What about Wayne?” Your heart was a little broken thinking about him leaving Wayne behind.

“Couldn’t be more thrilled for me. He’s still livin’ off that Hawkins Lab hush money, so he’s part time and can come see me whenever he wants.” He took a long drag, before he looked away, then back at you. “Anyways, I was going to ask, I know it’s last minute but can I crash at your place for a tiny little while?” He now scratched at the stubble on his chin and raised his eyebrows in question.

“Eddie, I only have a studio apartment. It’s like, right above the bar.” You thought of how cramped it might be with the two of you living there. You’d come to love your small studio, and you were never interested in ever really sharing your space.

“I know, you’ve told me. I won’t get in your way, I’ll hardly be home when you are. And as soon as I’m there for a few weeks and figure out where I want to stay, I’ll get a lease. I just need some time to look around for somewhere reasonable. I promise in- in maybe less than a month? They gave me a big enough sign on I can pay for your whole month of rent, too. I’m just-“ he stuttered, “I’m actually pretty nervous about going somewhere I don’t know anyone, and I think having a little piece of home with me would be good to keep me centered.” He dropped and kicked out his cigarette at his humble confession, and raised his hands in surrender. “But I totally get it if you don’t want me in your hair everyday, I’ll just get a hotel and-”

You thought about it for a few moments, and you realized it may not be that bad to have Eddie around. You two got along fine, and you talked about mostly everything already so you could cut out the weekly phone calls if he was already there. “You can stay. As long as you need. I’ve got a pull out couch with a mattress, so you’re in luck. I don’t need help with rent, but you gotta keep the place clean, and no random people coming home. I don’t let any of my dates or the regulars at the bar know I live up there because things can get weird, and I like laying low. So if you wanna get with anyone, you gotta do it somewhere else.”

“Oh yeah, because I’m totally swimming in pussy right now.” He scoffed as you two walked back inside, and you were thankful he led the way in because your cheeks were tinted pink at his sarcastic comment. By now, everyone was standing up from the table to head over to the venue for Eddie’s show. You all split up into your separate cars.

“So, did he ask you about moving in?” Robin couldn’t even wait for the car door to shut before she started questioning you.

“Jesus, do you know everything?” You started your car and drove towards the Hideout.

“Yes. I do.” Robin said, excitedly.

“Yes, he did. I told him he can stay there as long as he needs to. Just no random girls or parties or anything.” You left out the comment he’d made about girls,maybe wanting to save it for another day.

“I told him you’d say yes.” She looked out the window, “so… Steve?” You looked at her and shrugged, “what do you think?”

“He looks different. Like he’s just turning into his dad already. Everything he hated, everything he wanted to get away from with me. He’s turning into it.”

“Yeah, he’s uh, a piece of work. Have you thought about talking to him?”

“I have no interest in that. I don’t need to talk to him.” You shut down the conversation as you turned your radio up, driving the back roads to the sketchy bar you hadn’t been to in what felt like years.

-

“Shots on me!” Steve slammed down another round of tequila shots on the sticky high top bar table you all had sat at to have a good view of the stage. You grabbed one and toasted as Steve remarked smartly, “Oh, so you’ll take alcohol from me, but not dinner? I see how it is.” Your crew were all feeling a bit loose already, the drinks at the Hideout were cheap and you were all buying rounds back to back. You rolled your eyes and shot him the bird as the tequila burned down your throat.

Eddie’s band started playing moments later, and the whole bar crowd turned their attention to the stage. He introduced themselves, announced his new plans, and everyone cheered for him. You were beaming at your friend, the town “freak” who was finally getting his shot at what he wanted in life, and people were seeing him for who he was and not what he was known for that was never true.

“Grabbing another one, you good?” You asked Robin over the loud music as you nudged her shoulder. She shook her head and you got up, pushing your way through the crowd to the bar. You felt a hand on your lower back as you waited for the only bartender to come over to you and jumped, immediately pushing the hand away.

“Couldn’t let you go alone.” Steve was standing entirely too close to you for comfort.

“I’m a big girl, Steve. I’m just fine.” You told your drink order to the bartender after Steve did, leaving you two with a few moments of silence.

“You look good. Like, really good.” You watched as he ran his hands through his hair while he obviously checked you out, clearly nervous to be seeing you again. You caught him staring at the tattoos peeking through your sheer black top.

“Thanks? I guess now that I don’t have to impress anyone’s parents I get to dress how I want.” You were feeling a little extra sarcastic and snippy tonight, but you were a few drinks in and didn’t care.

“Can you cut the shit like that?” He immediately came back at you with sassiness.

“No, Steve. It’s been a year, I had to move on and you broke my fucking heart and I had to fix it myself. You fucked this up on your own.”

“Can I fix it?” He reached for your hand, but you pulled it back.

“No, you can’t. I don’t need you to make things better.”

“Listen, I know I fucked up. Everything here reminds me about it. I regret it all the time- but just think about all the bullshit we’d been through. I wasn’t in a good place.”

“Think about all the bullshit we went through? Steve, I was there too, and on top of it all, I lost my mom. All the more reason for you to not cheat on me- you do realize that was wrong to do to me after everything we’d just had happen to us? I wasn’t okay either, I’m still not sometimes, but I know cheating on my boyfriend wasn’t going to be the proper way to deal with things.”

“I should’ve told you sooner, I shouldn’t have done anything that I did. But you know how my parents are, honey.” He pleaded with his big, soft eyes as the word made bile rise in your throat.

“You have absolutely no right to ‘honey’ me, Steve.” You scoffed. You suddenly remembered his date had never shown up. “Your girl stand you up?”

“No, she can’t stand metal so she’s going to come near the end of the set so she can hang out. It would be nice if you could be cordial.” Steve scratched at his bicep- he’d taken off his nicer shirt and jacket, and was now just in his solid undershirt and his well fitting pants to not stand out as much here.

“Cordial, Steve!? I have to be cordial to the girl you were fucking behind my back, the girl who attempted to ruin my plans to get out of this town? Because guess what? I found out you were a bullshitter about that too. I don’t know how you can stay here or visit so much Steve. I’m so scared something is going to turn to red and dust falling from the sky before my eyes and I’ve not even been here a full day.” You were immediately mad at yourself for confessing something so big to Steve. “I’m not going to be mean, but I’m not trying to make a new friend.”

“I’m sorry.” He solemnly said as he took a sip from his fresh drink. “I’m scared of those things too, I still see it if I close my eyes for too long sometimes.”

“Yeah? Well, I also still see the smug look on her face when I walked into the house that night.” You grabbed your drink and made your way back to the table, where Robin had been watching the interaction the whole time. Steve quietly joined the table a few moments later looking like a hurt puppy, and then he stepped away, leaving his drink.

“You good?” Your friend nudged you in the side.

“Not really, no. But I got some things off my chest, so at least I can say I talked to him.” You drank the rest of your drink down in a few sips, and looked to the stage to distract yourself. “I did say I’d be… not mean once she gets here. But I can’t make any promises.” You started replaying memories of the last time you saw Steve in your head, and you could feel the resentment surfacing again- you remembered the shame you felt when the whole party was looking at you yelling at him, the proud look on the girl's face when she realized that you’d seen the two of them.

Eddie was looking at you with concern. He subtly motioned for you to come over to him. The stage at the Hideout was barely considered a stage, so it didn’t take much for you to get to him, and since he was in between songs, he crouched down while the rest of the guys checked their instruments.

“We got two more songs, wanna go sit in the back? There’s a couch, and more tequila, and no Steve.” You nodded at him, holding back some tears of frustration. “It’s okay, I’ll be there in a bit.” You nodded as he patted your head, ruffling your hair up a little as he stood tall to continue onto the next song.

You sat on the questionable couch in the back room of the Hideout while the muffled music continued on- you’d been back here a few times before but never by yourself, and “security” knew who you were so you were immediately let back. It felt weird, and you felt bad for leaving your friends but you really weren’t in the mood to talk about the past, or try to reconcile it especially since Steve was still with the girl he cheated on you with. Your thoughts were interrupted by Eddie bursting through the door, and then he quickly shut it.

“Hey.” He was out of breath, almost panting as if he’d run back to get to you as quickly as he could but you knew it was from the performance he was giving on stage. “You alright?”

You wiped a tear that was trying to fall as he walked in. “Yeah, I’m fine. He tried talking to me at the bar and I’m just… I’m not interested in trying to keep any type of friendship going between the two of us.” You watched as Eddie wiped the sweat off his face with the bottom of his shirt, revealing his abdomen that was littered with scars from ‘86. Your stomach sank at the memories. “You would think after everything he’s been through- we’ve been through, he would’ve changed his ways but I guess he hasn’t.”

“Fuck him. I mean- obviously don’t… you already did, but, forget about him.” He poured two shots and handed one to you, you probably shouldn’t take it but the night wasn’t ending anytime soon- they were kicking everyone out of the bar and keeping it open later for the band “and friends”, so you knew you’d be here a while tonight. The tequila burned as it went down, and you wiped your mouth on your am as you handed Eddie the shot glass back.

“It’s hard to forget about him when you guys are still friends with him and I have to hear about him. I always tune it out. I didn’t ever want anyone to take sides. I was an idiot tonight and brought up how I hate being back here, and being so afraid of something else happening from the upside down, and I just feel so dumb for letting him in.”

“You heard me that night, he’s too much of a pussy to leave the comfort of his parents pocket. And I stay away from him as much as I can, I don’t need a charge under my belt after getting my name cleared.”

“Ugh, why does he have to be so fucking pretty though?” Your drunk thoughts were leaving your mouth before you realized it. You thought about his golden blonde highlights, his warm eyes, and how his clothes always fit him just right.

“Because he’s Steve Harrington and that’s who he is.” Eddie plopped down beside you. “You’re really fucking pretty too, though.”

You rolled your eyes and lightly hit Eddie’s arm again, “Stop it. I already said you can crash at my place, you don’t have to get all sweet on me.”

“No, I mean it.” Eddie was looking at you as you looked to your side at him. “You’ve always been pretty, and I’ll be sweet on you if I wanna be.”

“Munson, you don’t have to keep flattering me to make me feel better.” He was one of your close friends too, but he’d been there for you when Steve hadn’t been. He called to check on you all of the time, sometimes more than Robin.

“I’m not just trying to flatter you, I mean it. You’re stunning and you look beautiful tonight.” His hand rested atop yours and gave it a light squeeze, making butterflies appear in your belly.

You mentally told yourself you couldn’t do this again- start crushing on a close friend, and potentially lose them. Especially with him about to be signed to a label and getting better known. Your brain was already running a thousand miles a minute with the way he was looking at you.

“You think so?” You asked with a smirk, and you saw a glimmer in his eye. “Well, you certainly have aged well in the time I’ve been gone too, Mr. Rockstar.”

“Oh yeah?” His voice got deeper as he scooted closer to you and let out a small chuckle. “In one year?”

“I’m too drunk to answer that right now.” You laughed and rolled your eyes.

“Oh no, I love drunk you. I get all the juicy gossip from you after a few drinks. You think I’m not too bad now, eh?”

“You heard me.” You said, facing him and crossing your arms.

“Yeah, I did. And I kinda wanna hear it again.” Was this really happening? In the back room of the Hideout? You’d been a little flirty on the phone with him sometimes, but it was hard to read into what he really meant without seeing him, and you never knew with Eddie because he was always a flirt with everyone.

“I said you weren’t bad, Munson.” You felt your face warming up. “Always thought you were cute, but I was too wrapped up in Steve-”

“‘S just Eddie, sweetheart.” He looked cocky as he interrupted you and tucked a piece of hair behind your ear- a classic, cheesy move that made you blush. He looked… good. His curls were wild and untamed, but you could tell he had started to take better care of them recently because they were more defined. His jaw was sharper, his face was capable of growing some more facial hair. His features were showing a little more- the wrinkles by his eyes, the subtle dimples, more freckles. How were you suddenly this close to him?

“Is this a bad idea?” You asked out loud to him.

“I don’t think so.” He stroked your cheek with his thumb and shook his head. “At least not for tonight, let’s have a little fun, yeah?”

You nodded, and leaned in and kissed him. You never made the first move, so you didn’t know how much to put into the first kiss. You felt hesitant, but once you were pulled in more by Eddie’s grip on either side of your face, all hesitancy fell to the wayside. You felt dizzy from the passion that he kissed you with. Both of his hands were practically squeezing your face, and you took the queue to straddle his lap, and he let out a sigh as you rested your weight on his thighs.

“Been wantin’ to kiss you for years now, Jesus Christ.” He chuckled against your lips. “Harrington was so fucking stupid to lose you.” He leaned in again, and you allowed him to take over.

“Alright people let’s go- oh! Oh! It’s happening!” Robin opened the door, making you pull back from Eddie quickly.

“Shut up, Buckley.” Eddie turned to shoo her away, and you blushed at your seat upon Eddie’s lap. “We were just talking.”

“You look awfully close to me. Listen, Steve’s girl is out there now, and I’d rather watch paint dry than sit out there and talk to them. Come out and have some fun, please!” She whined as the two of you stood up.

“Give us a minute, Robin.” You pushed her out of the door and closed it. As soon as you turned around, Eddie was cornering you against the door. “What?” You blushed.

“Didn’t get to finish that kiss.” He grasped you by the side of the neck and pulled you into his lips, hungrier, and needier than the first two times. You were breathing heavily into the heated kiss as your hands roamed his body, he was sweaty but you didn’t care- you were too, from the crowded room earlier. “We can talk later, just wanted to test the waters first.” He smirked as he pecked your lips and reached for the door handle behind you.

As you exited the tiny room, Eddie’s hand fell to your side, where he laced his pinky finger with yours and guided you through the shrinking crowd to the bar.

“Water?” He asked you, pulling your hand up to the bar and lacing his fingers with yours, proudly.

“Yeah, for now.” You said, a sheepish smile on your face. You felt a pair of eyes on you from the corner of the bar where Steve sat with his girlfriend, and you ignored them and focused on the water that the bartender had given you.

“Just ignore him. They’ll leave soon anyway, she doesn’t feel safe here or some bullshit like that. I gotta go pack up my stuff really quick, you good to stay here?” He had moved his hand to your lower back, and you nodded. “M’kay. I’m out back if you need me.” He placed a quick kiss on your cheek, then jogged away.

“Details, please.” Robin quickly replaced Eddie, turning her body completely to you, giving Steve her back.

“What?”

“Oh, come on! You two were kissing!” She was yelling unnecessarily, used to the loudness of the bar before people had emptied out, and you leaned forward to put your hands over her mouth. “And that, before he just left?!”

“SHHHHHH!! So what? I’m a little drunk, and he looks reeaaally good tonight.” You two giggled, “He’s a really good kisser.”

“Knew he had it in him. He’s been talking about seeing you again for weeks. MONTHS! I figured he would’ve tried kissing you at dinner when you two walked out, but-”

“Robin, how can you not tell me that he had a crush on me?!” You wanted to squeeze your best friend.

“How could you be so blind?! He told me it started in high school. Then you started dating Steve, and he got mixed up into our group and he felt bad about his crush because you were with Steve, so he never thought he’d have a chance but now everything is just… falling into place. Meant to be.” Robin was out of breath again because she was talking so quickly and you just laughed at her spilling the details out so quickly- it reminded you of how Eddie would talk when he got really excited about things too.

“You really thought he had no feelings for you? Why do you think that metal head idiot called you almost every day for the last year? To make sure you were okay? No, he likes you. He really, really likes you.” Your friend told you as you turned around to see Eddie walking out the back door of the bar, catching a glimpse of you before he walked outside, carrying his equipment.

-

Somehow you found yourselves at a house party, because of course, you always did. And it was at Steve’s girlfriends house, because of course it was. God only knows how late it was now, the Hideout had kicked you out earlier. Eddie had driven your car to the house- he’d had the least amount to drink, and you and Robin had sat in the backseat and giggled the whole way. You completely missed the way he was watching and admiring you in the rear view mirror for the 15 minute drive back to town.

“I can’t believe that I thought this was what I wanted.” You drank the mystery juice out of the red cup and leaned against the kitchen counter, looking at all of the same people you remembered from school. You noticed how more people were high fiving Eddie, or saying hey to him instead of just calling him “freak”, or using him to buy weed while you two stood together.

“It’s comfortable, it’s stable. You haven’t had much stability your whole life, so I can understand the appeal.” Eddie took a puff from his joint and you politely declined, afraid to mix the two tonight since you were already so deep into drinking alcohol.

“I know but still. This house is fucking gorgeous, you know? They never have to worry about anything like bills, or-”

“But look at how unhappy they are.” Eddie said, pointing out the lack of smiles on some of the party goers.

“You’re just saying that because you’re high and happy right now.”

“No, I’m not. I’m saying that because it’s the truth. They’ve got all the money in the world but they’re still so fucking miserable with themselves they’ve got to keep throwing parties to relive the old days and feel like they’re peaking again.” Eddie rambled on for some more time as you caught yourself staring at Steve. The way his mouth turned up when he smiled- why was it so charming still? “Helloooooo?” Eddie bumped your hip beside you, and you stopped staring immediately.

“Sorry. Zoned out for a bit. Can you hold my drink while I go to the bathroom?” You handed him your cup and he took it, but you giggled as he took a sip and almost gagged on it at the sour, bitter taste.

You were doing the thing in the bathroom where you stared at yourself and realized how drunk you really were. Fuck. You fixed your hair, and washed your hands, and as soon as you opened the door, there was another force behind it that opened it and they let themselves into the bathroom.

Of fucking course, it was Steve Harrington. And you were entirely too drunk for this.

“Like what you see? Saw you staring.” You rolled your eyes, but you couldn’t help but blush. He placed his hands on your waist gently and waited for a reaction from you. When you gave him none, he took a step closer. “Only got a few minutes, what do you say? I saw the way Munson was all over you. Probably tried to get his paws on you backstage, didn’t he?” Steve started kissing your neck and you knew you should’ve pushed him off, but fuck did his mouth feel good, and familiar.

“Yeah, and he did.” You fought a moan, but lost once he reached the spot on your neck that drove you wild. It was a secret spot, Steve had found it one afternoon while you guys were lazily making out in his bed, under the sheets, and he used it all the time.

“Bet he didn’t make you feel this good, did he?”

“Steve, you’ve got a girl-”

“She’s upstairs puking right now. I missed you.” He said as he continued attacking your neck. You draped your arms around his neck and he refocused his attention to you. “Please, can I kiss you?”

You should’ve said no, you should’ve walked out before you leaned in and answered his question without saying a single word. The kiss was hot and heavy, Steve’s lips felt different than Eddie’s- they were smoother, and his kiss was softer. You weren’t sure you liked it anymore, but you kept on. His hands roamed your body, and he moaned as he felt you up, your body feeling different than the last time he’d seen you. Your fingers went to his thick, chocolate brown hair and you ran your nails through his scalp, earning a moan from him.

“Fuck I missed you.” He looked at you, and even though he was also drunk, you could tell he meant it.

“Yeah.” You panted, and dodged his next kiss. “I-I can’t do this, Steve. You completely crushed me. I just got over you, I can’t give this another try. I can’t believe I let myself kiss you.” You still had your arms around him, and your fingers were toying with the hair at the nape of his neck.

“C’mon, honey. You know me better than anyone. I can’t tell her any of this shit I’ve been through, she’ll think I’m fucking crazy.”

“You should have thought about that before you kissed her.” You pecked him on the cheek and left the bathroom, fixing yourself as best as you could as you made your way back to the kitchen. Eddie was making a small deal in there, and his eyes immediately caught yours. You hesitated for him to finish, and he tilted his head to go outside, and you pushed through the familiar sliding glass doors to wait on him.

“Feel good after that?” He asked, his hands tucking into his jacket pockets. “Couldn’t have made that anymore obvious, honey.” The nickname was laced with venom.

“Eddie, I- I really did have to pee, then he came in there to talk and I-”

“The door get jammed? You couldn’t unlock it? Had to make out with king Steve in the bathroom for the door to unlock?” He coughed out a laugh. “I can't believe I thought you might’ve actually been over him.”

“I wish it were you.”

“You know, I know I jumped into the gang pretty late so I missed the beginning history of you two, but-”

You lunged forward at Eddie, shutting him up for once. “Shut up, we made out and all I thought about was how I wish it was you I was kissing, not him.”

“You mean it?” He asked you, his eyebrows raised.

“Yes, Munson.” You rolled your eyes at him.

“Can Robin get a ride home without you?”

“Probably, why?” You asked as the taller, curly haired boy made himself impossibly closer to you- you could still smell the show on him, the sweat, the spilled alcohol, the cigarettes, and you wanted it.

“Because you’re mine tonight, if nothing else. I wanna take you back to my place. Go find her, I’ll be waiting in your car.”

“O-okay.” You nervously answered him and walked back into the house. “Robin!” You pulled her away from a few people.

“Word travels fast. You better get out of here soon, because she already heard about you and Steve.”

“Perfect. Can you get home?”

“Yeah, I can, where are you going?”

“Great, I’ll see you tomorrow.” You jogged out of the house, and towards your car where Eddie was sitting with it already cranked up and running. “She can find a way home, she said.”

“Say less, my dear.” Eddie put his hand on the back of your headrest as he looked back to reverse out of the parking spot in front of the house, then he sped off to the direction of his and Wayne’s shared house. You knew Wayne worked nights still from all of your late night conversations with Eddie.

Your stomach turned thinking about what was going on right now, what was about to happen. And he must’ve known, or been able to read your mind.

“We don’t have to do anything but sleep- I’ll even sleep on the couch. I just wanted you out and away from him. I can’t see you getting hurt by him again.” His hand rested on your knee, and his thumb rubbed gentle circles as he drove.

“But you said-”

“I know what I said, but I’m high and horny as hell, but I can keep my dick in my pants unlike someone else we know. And you look too fucking good tonight, you told me you got some tattoos but you didn’t tell me you had this many? S’driving me wild.”

You blushed as you watched Eddie run a hand through his hair, something he did when he was nervous. “You left out that you were even more handsome than ever, too.” You commented back, but it wasn’t even the top of surface of what you could say about Eddie and how he’d changed over the last year. You got to his house, the porch light was the only one on, and he hurried with you to the front door since the fall air was creeping in and you weren’t appropriately dressed for it.

“What about your van?” You asked as you walked in, and kicked off your black boots.

“I’ll get it in the morning, they’re used to me leaving it overnight sometimes.”

“Thought you weren’t drowning in pussy, Munson?” You joked as you approached him, your arms reaching up and wrapping around his neck, as his pulled you in by your waist.

“I’m not, but I could be if you’d let me. And I told you, quit with the last name shit. I like hearing my name out of those pretty lips.” Alright, he was smooth. You’d give him that. You both leaned in and continued making out, feeling each others bodies over clothes, shedding jackets on the floor, before he broke the kiss and guided you back to his room. “I swear I wasn’t expecting any guests so just give me a few and I’ll clean up.”

“Honestly it’s fine, I think I’m a little bit too drunk for anything tonight anyway, but don’t think I’m not interested-”

“Hey, I told you that’s fine.” He kissed the top of your head. “I am gonna have to shower and take care of some things before I go to bed but I’ll grab you a shirt so you don’t have to sleep in this getup tonight.” He roamed around his room and gathered a soft Iron Maiden shirt for you, and a pair of plaid boxers from a drawer. “Can’t promise the shirt is clean but I haven’t sweat in it, but it’s the softest one I have.” He tossed them at you before he left to shower, and you changed into them and tucked yourself into his bed.

“Hey.” You felt a gentle nudge on your shoulder, waking you up. My god, the sight that greeted you. Eddie was sitting on the side of his bed, his hair towel dried, he was shirtless, in a pair of boxers, and you could see more tattoos on his torso mixed in with all of his scars. “Take a picture, it’ll last longer.” He chuckled. “Want me to sleep out there? It’s up to you.”

“Nu uh.” You peeled back the comforter and sheets for him and he climbed in, laying down and facing you.

“I need a tattoo tour tomorrow.” He said through a grin. “Show me yours if you show me mine?”

You rolled your eyes, “Fine.”

Eddie tucked hair out of your face and looked at you. “Meant it when I said you were beautiful.”

“I’m sorry I kissed Steve tonight.” You felt terrible about it, honestly.

“It’s fine. I almost expected it. The dude gave you no closure. But I can say it feels good to know you wished it were me you were kissing and not him.”

“I don't have to pretend I like acid rock, or that I'd like to be on a mega yacht with important men who think important thoughts. Guess maybe I am better off now that we don't talk. And the only way back to my dignity was to turn into a shrouded mystery, just like I had been when you were chasing me, guess this is how it has to be now that we don't talk.”

Chicago->Hawkins, 1989

“Hey, babe. I made coffee. You gotta get up, the studio needs me in an hour, then we gotta leave.” You groaned as you were being woken up, you had worked the bar until 3 am the night before and stayed until almost 4 cleaning up the huge mess. Eddie had left the bar around midnight because he had some recording to do today before you left for Hawkins- Dustin and his friends were all graduating this weekend and you couldn’t miss it.

“But it’s only 10, please let me sleep some more.” You rolled over in your cozy bed, letting the comforter swallow you now that no one else was in it.

Eddie’s month-long stay ended up never ending. You had a breakdown at the thought of him leaving and not being in your apartment every day. He’d slept on the couch for a few weeks, and then one night you told him how you really felt.

The two of you’s relationship had intensified quickly, and progressed to dating after a month of being around each other. It was your first relationship that felt right, that fell into place so easily without any drama, and you were happy.

“You know good and well if I leave you asleep you’re not going to get up. I’m only going to be there for an hour, I just have to sign off on a few things. You still have to finish packing too.” He kissed your forehead as he handed you the warm cup of coffee.

“Do we have to go?” You pouted over your first sip. You wanted to see your friend’s graduation, but you dreaded the inevitable. And Eddie had promised to play a show back at home with the guys, so you’d be spending a few nights there.

“Yes. We do. I mean, you can stay, but you’ll get awfully lonely here, dontcha think?” He leaned in and winked, “remember what happened last time I said I was going to leave?”

“I guess so.” You groaned as you sipped the coffee. “What if I see him?”

“What if? Baby, you don’t need to worry about it.” He placed his hand on your thigh, which was covered by your comforter. “It’s been so long ago, and he’s just there to see the kids graduate too. We’ve avoided him any other time we’ve gone back to see them, haven’t we? He’s not like a monster that’s gonna get you or anything.”

“No, but he’s Steve fucking Harrington and he knows how to ruin a good time.”

Eddie sighed in defeat. He knew how anxious seeing your ex made you, there was nothing you or him could do about it. He changed the way your friend group was forever after he hurt you.

“You get to see Robin though, and we get to stay at her new place!” He tried to cheer you up. “Babe, I really gotta go. Finish packing, take a shower, and I’ll be home before you know it.” He pecked your lips before he left you lying in bed with your coffee and a tummy full of anxiety.

-

“Presenting the class of 1989!” Principal Higgins announced over the loudspeaker in the gymnasium. You both stood up to applaud the class as you watched them throw their hats in the air- something you remember doing, and you felt Eddie’s arm wrap around you as he pulled you in for a hug.

“You know, I would've shot Huggins the bird if I wouldn’t have been in the hospital.” Eddie leaned in to make you laugh.

“I know. You’ve told me, multiple times. At least you got your diploma.”

“Yeah, because he was sick of me and my satanic worship cult.” You rolled your eyes and chuckled as the two of you exited the gym, waiting for your friends to meet up with you.

Robin and Nancy found you both quickly, giving you gigantic hugs, and asking you questions about how you were doing. A few minutes later, the graduates had made their way over and you watched as Eddie’s smile reached his eyes and he almost squeezed the life out of Dustin. You could tell how proud he was of him, even though he was one of the smartest kids you both had ever known.

You gave him a hug next, “Proud of you, kid.”

“I’m not a kid! I’m an adult now, you know that? I’m going to college soon!”

“Still just little dusty buns to us.” You said and you were pulled into Eddie’s side quickly, almost knocking you off balance. You were used to his clinginess by now, so it didn’t make you think twice about it until you saw Steve approaching the group. Everyone else greeted him like normal, but Eddie just kept you by his side as Steve said a quick hi to both of you.

You knew he had to know or have heard about you two dating. Eddie was on the phone with Dustin when he could, and you were always in touch with Robin and Nancy.

“So, we're ready to party, or what?” Steve clapped his hands together to interrupt the conversation.

“Let’s go!” Lucas shouted and you all split up into your groups. You heard your name being called, and you looked back. Steve was standing there and waved you over. Your heart tugged a little at the look on his face- he almost looked somber.

“You can go talk to him if you want, I’m not stopping you.” Eddie said, “We’ve gotta at least make an appearance at the party at his house. He might have something to say.”

“Fine, but watch if I need you to come rescue me.” Eddie pulled you in for a quick kiss as if he were making sure Steve knew that you were his, and you walked over to Steve with blushed cheeks, and butterflies in your stomach.

“Hey, I just wanted to talk.”

“Figured so, that’s why I came over here.” God, you sounded like a fucking idiot. How could Steve still look so good? You quickly checked him out to see he had dressed in pants that fit him perfectly, a short sleeve polo that was fit to his biceps just right, and his hair looked better than ever since he’d still kept some length on it.

“Are we, are we good?” He was stuttering, something you knew he only did when he was nervous.

“I mean, we’re fine? I guess. I’m over it, I’ve moved on.”

“Clearly.” You could tell the word came out of his mouth faster than he could think about what he was saying, “Are you happy?”

“Y-yeah, I am. He makes me really happy. I’m glad to be out of here, away from all of the past bullshit that happened here. And I’m glad to be away from here, with him specifically. I basically run the bar now, probably going to buy in in the next year or so depending on where Eddie goes with the band, if nothing else it could be some passive income while we’re on the road. What about you?” You kicked at some grass while you waited for his reply.

“Things are good. We just bought a house here, wedding is next year.” That was something everyone had left out of telling you. “Just proposed a few days ago, but the house had been in the works for a little while.”

“Oh wow, congratulations. I’m sure your parents are thrilled.” He looked at you funny, “I mean it this time. I’m not being a sarcastic asshole.” You both laughed a little.

“You look really good. I mean, not trying to be weird but you look like yourself. Like you’ve figured yourself out.”

“Feels like I have, finally. I think getting out of here was the best thing I could’ve done for myself. It feels weird being back here, you know? I wonder how many people really know everything that actually happened. Does she know?” You weren’t sure why you were bringing this up now, but you were curious.

“Hell no, do you know how insane that would sound?”

“I do know, I lived it too.” You said wistfully. You looked back to see Eddie looking at you, and you gave him a small wave of recognition. “I should get back, it was good to catch up.”

“Will I see you both at the house? Still drink tequila?” Steve asked.

“Yeah, still tequila. We’ll be there.” You both exchanged a small hug before you walked back to Eddie, your smile growing bigger as you reached your boyfriend, realizing you’d made some positive progress in your relationship with Steve.

“What was all that about?” Eddie asked as you two walked back to his van. “Took long enough.”

“He was just making sure we were good, and asked if I was happy, apparently he’s engaged and they bought a house together. He just proposed a few days ago.” You said as you hopped into Eddie’s car.

“Weird.” You noticed Eddie’s grip on the steering wheel was tight and you picked at your thumbs out of nerves. You reached up to turn up the radio volume, but he stopped you. He never did that.

“What?” You looked over at him, he was rubbing his face with the hand that wasn’t on the steering wheel.

“I might just drop you off and head over to Wayne’s. I’m really not in the mood for a party tonight.” He said, looking straight ahead.

“Eddie, what? I’m not going without you, I’ll just go see Wayne too. You’re the one who said we needed to make an appearance. It’s for the kids, it’s their graduation.”

“Nah, you seem like you want to go catch up more with your old pal Steve.” Your eyebrows furrowed as you looked at your boyfriend.

“Eddie, what are you talking about?”

“You couldn’t take your fucking eyes off of him. You couldn’t even hide that you were staring at him, basically drooling over how good he looked.” Silence filled the car. “See, you’re not even going to deny it, are you? You played the whole, I don’t wanna come back here card for all the wrong reasons. You didn’t wanna see Steve because you still have something for him, don’t you?”

“No, I don’t! I’m sorry if that’s what you thought, but-”

“Oh come on, anyone with two working eyes can see the way you were practically undressing him.”

“Eddie, I was not. It was a conversation that we needed to have, it was awkward, but at least now we’re on speaking terms. Beyond that, there’s nothing there with Steve. Yes, he’s still attractive- you’ve even said that yourself but if you pulled over on the side of the road right this second I’d fuck you in the backseat, okay? There is nothing about Steve Harrington that I want anymore. I don’t want that lifestyle, I never did, I thought I did- but I don’t. I don’t want to come home to a guy who won’t let me touch his shirt because it might get wrinkled or ruined, I wanna be with someone who doesn’t care what happens to their shirt when I touch it or tear it off of them. I want to be with you, Eddie. You’re it for me.” You were out of breath, and you looked over to see him staring straight ahead at the road in front of him. “You’re the one who told me to go talk to him! God, just take me to Robin’s if you’re going to be a bitch like this today.”

“Was going to anyway.” He scoffed and you turned in your seat to stare out the window and hold back tears. You two never fought like this. Ever.

Hours had passed, and you and Robin got ready together before leaving for the party at the new Harrington house. You’d changed into something more fun for the party- a mini skirt with tights, your black doc martens, and a cut up band tee from one of the local bands that had passed through your bar one night.

“Eddie’s really not coming?” Robin spoke halfway over to Steve’s new house. She knew the way, so you let her drive. She also said she’d be DD tonight, only having one drink at the time of arrival and nothing else.

“I guess not, he was being so not like himself earlier. He swore that I still had a thing for Steve and that I was undressing him as we talked. Robin, Eddie has said he thought Steve was attractive before. Anyone with two eyes can see that.”

“He’ll get over it, he’s probably just feeling insecure about it because of the last time we were all at a party together.” She brushed it off, but you couldn’t as you bit the inside of your lip.

One hour into the party, and you were drunk. You didn’t know how many tequila sodas with lime you’d had, but it was enough that Robin was already giving you the eye. You spent so many of your nights at the bar not drinking, that you wanted to have fun tonight celebrating the kids graduation before the show at the Hideout the next night.

“Having fun?” Steve slid up beside you as you were pouring another drink for yourself.

“Your bar has definitely improved since high school parties.”

“Where’s Eddie?” He was quick to look around for your boyfriend.

“Oh, I don’t know. Robin and I came here together because Eddie was too much of a bitch to me earlier, saying we were- like you and me- were undressing each other with our eyes while we were talking at graduation, and even though I told him if he pulled over on the side of the road I’d-”

“Whoa, whoa, I don’t need to hear all of that. I was just asking where he was because I wanted to talk to him too. Do you know if he’s coming at all?”

You shrugged as you skillfully cut a lime wedge and tossed it into your cup. “No idea. Guess we’ll have to find out later.”

Later came soon enough, and it happened to be when everyone had decided to jump into Steve and his fiancé’s pool, most of you in whatever clothes or underwear you had on under clothes. No one was thinking twice about it either, since you’d all been friends for so long and were a little more mature about this type of thing. And you were all pretty drunk at this point in the night, too.

“Cannonball!” Dustin yelled as he jumped in, splashing you and Robin for the tenth time tonight.

“Uh oh, the fun just got here.” She said to you as she pointed her finger towards the back gate. You watched as Eddie opened the gate and stalked over to the pool, and scanned the pool of bodies for yours. Your back was to him, so you secretly hoped he wouldn’t see you, maybe? You were at the point you would’ve been happier going home alone with Robin and he stayed at Wayne’s.

“How’d he find the house?”

“The uh, invite is probably on my fridge or something. I left a key under the mat in case I wasn’t home yet when you guys came by to drop your stuff off, so I can only assume that’s how he has the address?” You couldn’t hear what she was saying as you blankly stared at her, feeling Eddie’s eyes on your mostly bare back.

You heard him say your name loud enough for you to hear, but you ignored him and took another sip of your drink. He repeated himself, but louder and you felt like a child getting in trouble with their parents.

You slowly turned to look at him, and he was crouched by the edge of the pool. He curled his finger at you to come towards him. You waded through the pool and with each step your stomach felt sicker and sicker- you wish it was from the alcohol, and not your nerves.

“You decided to show up?” You joked, leaning against the pool.

“Why the fuck are you in your goddamn underwear in Steve Harrington’s pool? Get out.” His voice was thick with disgust.

“No, I’m having fun.” You shook your head.

“Come on, we’re leaving.”

“I’m having fun with Robin.” If you could stomp your foot like a child right now, you would have.

“Do you want me to drag you out of there? I don’t want his eyes on you.”

“Not like it’s anything I haven’t seen before.” Suddenly Steve was beside you- a safe distance, but enough to hear the conversation. “Got a problem, Munson? Didn't wanna come party?”

“Fuck off, Harrington.” He spat at him, and you were disgusted by both boys pissing contest. You heard a swoosh of water, and suddenly Steve was pushing against the edge of the pool to climb out. Dripping in water, in his boxer briefs, he stepped closer and closer to Eddie.

“She’s having fun, leave her alone.” Steve stated boldly.

“I can make my own decisions.” You tried to hoist yourself out of the pool and you miserably failed. Eddie stepped over to offer his hands, and you took them to skip having to walk over to the pool steps. Very quickly, Eddie was shrugging off his jacket and draped it over your shivering shoulders.

“C’mon, let’s get you dressed and out of here.” He tried to coax you but you hesitated.

“Why didn’t you come here sooner?” You asked.

“We’ll talk about it in the car.” He said, pulling on your hand gently. Steve looked between the both of you, as his fiancé walked up behind him, placing a hand on his shoulder. Of course her underwear was more intriguing than yours- it probably had cost Steve a fortune and a half to purchase and it was the type that probably would be ruined in pool water.

“I want my question answered Eddie. I was waiting all night for you to come here, and-”

“I said, we’ll talk about it in the fucking car.” He got in your face and spoke through gritted teeth. You had absolutely never seen him like this- and then you saw it. His eyes were bloodshot- and not from weed, red from crying.

“O-okay.” You agreed and quietly followed, grabbing your clothes on your way out. You didn’t bother putting them on, you just climbed into the car and Eddie turned the heat on as he started to drive off slowly.

“I went to see Wayne and he told me that my dad died. I don’t know why I’m so fucking upset, I hated the man, but-” you put your hand on his leg as he choked on a cry.

“It’s your dad, shitty or not, it’s still your dad.”

“Then, to see you, in your underwear, in the guy who broke your fucking heart into a million pieces pool while I’ve spent the last year of my life helping you put them back together all while falling in love with you, I just- I don’t fucking get it, man.” He was doing the thing where he cries but laughs it off because he’s so upset. “I thought I was past this, thought we were past this but I guess not.” The rest of the ride was completely silent. Eddie took a deep breath as he stopped the car in the parking lot of Robin’s apartment complex. “Please tell me you’re over him.”

“Eddie, I’ve told you a thousand times-”

“I can’t take you lying to me.”

“Do you want me to say I still love him?! What kind of answer do you want from me, Eddie? I’m telling you the fucking truth. I let you move into my place, I sleep beside you every goddamn night and even before we were officially dating, just the thought of you not being feet away from me on that stupid pull out couch was enough to make me realize I wanted you, you’re the one I want. I don’t want that life Steve has, I’ve told you time and time again. I’m so fucking happy with you Eddie. I don’t want the fancy cars, the big trips, the overcompensating with a big house. I want our life we have right now, the one we’ve made over the last year. This is why I don’t like coming back here, because it brings up all of this old shit that has settled like dust already. I don’t want anything to do with Steve Harrington anymore. Okay?”

“Okay.” He answered, and turned off the car. He slowly got out of it, and walked over to your side to help you out- your ass cheeks had stuck to the leather of the seat and he walked behind you to keep you decent.

The next morning came and went quickly, all three of you were far too hungover to do anything more than to eat junk food and watch movies in Robin’s living room. The shrill shriek of her phone made all of your heads pound, and she couldn’t get up off the couch quick enough to answer it.

“Yeah… she’s fine. Uh huh. He’s here too. Okay. Ooooookay, then.” Robin hung up the phone and sat back down. “Steve’s not coming to the show tonight, he said he’s sorry.” Eddie sighed a sigh of relief, and you swallowed loudly enough to make him look at you with wide eyes.

“Sorry, just… feel like I’m gonna be sick.” You hopped up and ran to the bathroom, and slammed the door shut. About ten minutes later, you heard a knock on the door and the door slowly opened and you looked up at Eddie from the seat you’d taken on the floor. He joined you, and asked if you were okay.

“M’fine, just drank too much last night. Don’t let me do that again tonight.”

“Well, Steve won’t be there, so I don’t suspect you’ll have to drink away your feelings.” He muttered as another hurl came up, and Eddie held your hair back for you.

“I cannot be your friend, so I pay the price of what I lost, and what it cost- now that we don’t talk.”

1993

You fixed your eyeliner in the mirror with the shakiest hand you’d ever had. You messed up again, and muttered a “fuck” loudly to the room of your closest girlfriends.

“Let me help, your eye is going to be raw.” Nancy sat down on the bench beside you and you turned to her in your white silk robe to let her fix your makeup.

“Probably going to cry it all off anyway. When I went out to grab drinks, Dustin said Eddie’s a wreck too.” Robin chimed in and you looked at her quickly.

“Nervous? Is he going to call it off?” Your stomach churned at the thought of it.

“The man would do anything for you. I think we’ve all seen that over the last few years. Now, sit still before this eyeliner wing ends up in your hairline.”

It was yours and Eddie’s wedding day, finally. You’d both opted for a small wedding, with his bandmates, old and new, your closest group of friends, small family members, and no one else. Eddie and his band had blown up the music scene over the last few years, and you’d been along for the ride the entire time with him- all of the ups and downs. A big wedding was something you never wanted, and with his newfound fame, it made more sense to keep it small and intimate.

Your hands were shaky as you paced the now empty bridal suite, surely you’d worn the carpet down by how many times you’d walked back and forth. You didn’t know why, but you just felt something was off. You mentally checked everything off on your list and you weren’t forgetting anything. Your handwritten vows were in the hidden pocket of your dress, Robin had Eddie’s ring, and Dustin had your ring.

Then came the knock on the door. You hesitated, not wanting it to be Eddie trying to sneak a peak in your moment of solitude before the ceremony.

“Who is it?” You asked through the thin, wood door.

“It’s me, Steve.” The voice on the other side was shaky as he spoke. You hadn’t seen him in a while, probably a few years actually. He’d gotten married, but Eddie was on tour so you couldn’t make it back home. The weekend of Steve’s wedding was actually one of the only weekends Eddie didn’t have a show, but you didn’t question Eddie when he said he needed to have a weekend off and not go home for the wedding. You didn’t want to go alone, so you stayed back too. “Mind if I come in?” He sounded scared, but he probably was. There had been absolutely no communication between you two in a very long time, and it was all on your side.

“Yeah sure, but not for long.” You opened the door to see him standing there, dressed smart as always.

“You look absolutely stunning.” He took in the sight of your intricate lace gown that showed off your tattooed skin, and complimented your body shape perfectly.

“Thanks, but I don’t think you should-”

“You’re absolutely right. I shouldn’t be here, so I’m not. I’m leaving, but I didn’t want to leave without saying goodbye.” Your eyebrows furrowed. “Clearly you don’t want us to be friends, so I was shocked to even receive an invitation to your wedding, but after thinking about it more, and now seeing you- I really don’t need to be here. I talked to Eddie, and he had a letter to give to you, so he gave it to me to give to you before I left.”

You paused before speaking, and you looked at the man who stood before you holding a letter from your almost husband with shaky hands. He’d changed a little bit, but you both had. His scars on his face were lighter but still there, and you couldn’t help but wonder if he’d told his wife how he got it yet. Had she even asked yet how he’d gotten any of them, at that? The golden highlights in his hair were still there, shiny as ever. And his eyes were warm, warm like his nickname for you- honey.

You were speechless as you continued to stare blankly at him, your mouth couldn’t form any words, except “Thank you. Bye, Steve.” He nodded, smiled, and walked away, and out of your life forever.

You decided you couldn’t be friends as you watched him walk away, with all the things you’d lost- like the pieces of your heart that you’d never get back, that he’d taken without asking. You watched him through the window as he wiped an eye, hoping it was the wind causing the tear, but by the way his hair stayed in place you knew it wasn’t. But you knew he’d felt the same way, come to the same conclusion.

You couldn’t be friends anymore, you couldn’t even talk.

[shieldofiron]

Saf...

I know it's been done, probably a million times, but...

harringrove roommates AU, idiots in love, and everyone ELSE can see it but they're both absolutely oblivious until an outside throws the word boyfriend at them forcing them to reevaluate.

and go, would it be so bad? everything would remain the same, only there would be kissing now and other stuff.

and then maybe they would decide to pretend they still have no idea to see how long it would take Max and their friends to notice...

that was my 2.20am thoughts.

going to bed now

ily

LOL also yet again, your one thought is like a whooooole enchilada longfic, my friend. And I have so many of those cooking. But I was inspired to write a little snippet of this. Consider it a slice of their weird little life.

---

"I think I'm going to go on a porn fast."

There's no reason for Robin to give him that look. They talk about everything. He helped her check herself when she had an ingrown hair that she thought was an STD, for God's sake.

"What?" Steve frowned.

"A porn fast." She looked absolutely disgusted. He was talking about less porn, what was her problem.

"Yeah. Like 30 days, no porn," Steve shook his head, "I just feel like I'm doing it too much, you know. I'm gonna get carpal tunnel."

"Are you going to move out?" She smirked.

"What the hell does that mean?"

"What it means, Dingus-"

She paused when Billy waltzed in and pulled out one earbud, tiny shorts hiked up so high they were basically underwear, glistening from his workout.

"Have you seen my water cup?" Billy's chest was heaving, a drip of sweat sliding down the center of his chest towards his happy trail.

"You mean your basic white girl cup?" Steve rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, whatever, Pretty Boy. It's huge and it stays cold as fuck," Billy leaned in to where Steve sat at their tiny breakfast nook, and smirked, "I've seen you steal a sip."

"As if," Steve scoffed, "Robin he's obsessed with one of those huge Stanley cups."

"That is a basic bitch move," Robin shrugged, "He's got you Billy."

"Yeah he does," Billy licked along his lower lip, "You've seen it. C'mon, baby, tell me."

Steve sighed, "I washed it, because you never do. It's over there."

Billy snuck in close for a kiss on the cheek, and heat washed over Steve's body, probably from Billy standing so damn close after lifting. He was like a furnace, and Steve had fallen asleep with him enough on the couch to know.

"Thanks, Pretty Boy."

Steve watched Billy pop in his air bud, and assemble and fill his cup for a moment, shaking his booty to whatever his dumb workout mix was, only to be brought out of it when Robin pinched him.

"Don't know how you're gonna do a porn fast with your fucking boyfriend doing a playgirl shoot all around your apartment."

Steve's mouth fell open, "He's my roommate."

"Yeah. And you stare at him and jack off all the time because you feel sooo normal about that."

Steve kicked her weakly under the table, not even able to speak. He wasn't that way about Billy. Couldn't be. That was his roommate.

Later that night after Robin had gone home, he was curled up on the couch next to Billy's furnace of a body.

"Have you even had a sip of water all day?" Billy asked, eyeing Steve's diet coke.

"Yes, I have," He hadn't, "chill, you water obsessed freak."

Billy shoved the clear straw of his enormous silver cup in Steve's face, "Drink."

There shouldn't be something stirring in his stomach when Billy said shit like that. There shouldn't be...

"Good Boy," Billy said in a low laughing voice.

Billy wasn't his boyfriend. Nor was he porn.

But God help him, Steve was realizing he wanted him to be a little of both.

[rubyglasses]

Fancasting The Secret History

sharing my vision of who could play these classics students

i tried to be as realistic as possible, considering their book descriptions and casting actors close in age to each other and their characters. after seeing so many of the same names in these fancasts, i wanted to throw some new ones in the mix!

henry's a big guy, dark-haired, square-jawed, bespectacled — he basically looks like clark kent/superman. so my thought process went to henry cavill look-alike, jamie flatters (b. 2000). coincidentally, my old fancast was david corenswet, so i guess it all checks out. i only know jamie from avatar: the way of water, but based on his music videos, i think he's got the acting chops to capture henry's more unhinged side that he lets slip idk

to me, bunny is the most american out of the group because of his family background, it's even described as "an upbringing vitally present in Bunny in every respect, from the way he shook your hand to the way he told a joke." saw this rudy pankow (b. 1998) casting suggestion on mycast and it just made total sense to me. having watched him as jj maybank in outer banks, i know he can capture how obnoxious bunny can be, and he'll do well trying to annoy every character and pushing their buttons.

admittedly, this was a hard one because i originally had tom glynn-carney in mind but i wanted someone younger, so i didn't go too far and went with ty tennant (b. 2002) who's played the younger version of his characters twice now. i mean if you think about it, aegon ii targaryen and charles have a couple things in common: both are alcoholics and have an incestuous relationship with their sister 😭 since charles and camilla look androgynous and described as angels, i figured ty looks the part. i also believe in ty's acting skills to portray charles' complexity as the story goes on.

i thought of young actresses who resembled ty and went with thomasin mckenzie (b. 2000), who i loved in jojo rabbit and last night in soho. i know thomasin would look good as a blonde, but more importantly, she's got the face for period dramas. camilla is enigmatic, but i think richard just saw her as like an ingénue, so i figured thomasin can do that layered performance.

thought and long hard for who to cast as francis because i'm so tired of seeing the same redhead actors or some random redhead model 😭 thank goodness luther ford (b. 1999/2000) has been discovered. his portrayal in the crown sold me because it was very francis of him to just sit around drinking booze and smoking while dressed in modern princely clothing.

another inspired casting suggestion i saw on mycast — physically, i think dominic sessa (b. 2002) truly fits the bill; i like that he's not your conventionally good-looking guy too. acting-wise, he was incredible in the holdovers. and i believe he could put so much more personality to richard papen's character.

might make a part 2 for other characters like julian morrow and judy poovey :> thanks for checking this out and let me know if you see the vision!

p.s. it's never gonna happen but it'd be interesting to just see this set of actors get together because they seem like a bunch of introverts 😭 they might bond over taking film photos of each other though so that's cool