#but also when im at home I usually just don't read anything on the app

[blood-teeth]

hi! any tips for turning an idea into a plot / story?

hiiii sorry this took me so long!! tumblr doesn't tell me when i get an ask anymore for some reason???? idk idk but!

✨✨✨morgan's guide to turning ideas into a story✨✨✨

these may not work for you BUT if you're having a hard time piecing together something then i would give these a shot!

the first thing i do when i have an idea i write it down. USUALLY my ideas for me come in a sentence. For Tell Me If There's A Way Home, the sentence was "cowgirl that has to keep burying a body that pops up along her journey"

for This Grave Calls You Home it was "in the light of a dying star, the last astronaut wakes up"

BRAINSTORMING:

so anyway i immediately write this down somewhere, usually the notes app on my phone and i STOP WHAT IM DOING IMMEDIATELY

for me, i have hundreds of these sentences written down somewhere, but the ones that stick with me always stay in the back of my throat.

if its one that gets me really hot and bothered, then the seed is planted and it needs some water babes....

im RUNNING to find media that i feel fits with the idea ... on that netflix or spotify or library app STAT looking for anything that will help that seed grow inside my head. i need the VIBES and the MUSIC and ATMOSPHERE.

once that's on lock...i'm plotting with my little grimy hands rubbing together...

...and i buy...another....notebook... and i KNOW this sounds ridiculous but hear me out...writing in notebook vs on a computer has genuinely saved my life with writer's block so many times. ideas and thoughts and fragments just flow when i allow myself to write in a notebook. idk what it is. but this is just me, if computers or typewriters or what have you works then STICK WITH IT

by the time i'm done scribbling ideas in my notebook and acting unhinged, i have a decent idea about the atmosphere and the themes i'm looking to write about

IF AN IDEA CAME TO YOU, IT MEANS SOMETHING IMPORTANT. DON'T DISREGARD THIS

you need to figure out what it is about the idea that means so much to you - and whatever that reason is, that's gonna be the fundamental core of your story.

PLOTTING:

i have to admit something. i dont plot my stories. i dont know how to plot. i like to discover the story right alongside everyone else. what's gonna happen next? idk babes you and me are gonna find out together.

BUT i do try to have a general idea of where the story STARTS and ENDS. everything else is trial and error. and if u dont have any idea where the story ends, just know it'll come to you eventually. u have thousands and thousands of words to write before the end, so don't sweat this; it'll happen. even if its really simple!

using Tell Me If There's A Way Home as an example:

Start: a woman doesn't know who she is, only knows that she's looking for something

End: She's Found The Thing

think of it like a question and answer. (also! NOT answering the question is totally valid story telling too)

if u are really struggling, the number one thing i suggest is READING. you can glean so much information from reading its actually crazy. study your favorite books or movies or video games. almost always in western media there is the exposition, conflict, rising action, climax, falling action, and denouement. (this is super formulaic, so don't feel tied down by this! just a guide line.)

SETTING:

i think everyone gets really tied up in knots about setting. and it shouldn't be like that! this should be YOUR fun!!

setting has very little to do with story/plot itself. it affects the ATMOSPHERE of the story you're telling instead. (except, like, if you're telling an alice in wonderland story or a story about climate change ofc, there's exceptions to everything)

look the locked tomb for example. take out the space aspect, this story at its heart would be the exact same if it were set underwater inside decomissioned underwater research facilities. its just cool as fuck to have a space nun living on pluto.

Take twin peaks and put it in space. the heart of the show works anywhere, but the atmosphere and the mood is enhanced because its in a small, strange town.

you can write a story about generational trauma and put it into the world of jurassic park.

anyway, i hope that you are hearing me say have fun with your setting. it absolutely is a part of the story you're telling, but it is not the heart of it (sometimes)

MISC TIPS:

remember that this is YOUR work. you do whatever you want. it's not up to anyone else.

be obsessed with your own world and your characters!! i literally went to a craft store and made a rosary today for one of my characters and it has actually helped me write a ton today.

you are not stuck in this story. i feel like a pitfall i face often is like "ah man but this writing doesnt make sense in this genre i cant write this" and its like YEAH I CAN. why cANT I . do whatever you want with your story im so serious. you have no idea how many books are releasing now and the common feedback is "man this feels like a book ive read a million times before" and with movies its a remake or based off a book like the entertainment industry DESPERATELY needs new original ideas SO SO BAD. dont be scared to write that book that you're worried is too weird or doesn't make sense trust me.

make playlists! watch movies! play video games! these are all things that count as writing believe it or not.

and remember you are loved !

[jasper-is-autistic-old-blog]

howdy! today i wanna talk about the aac system i use and go over how i use it

im currently using the app Coughdrop on an Amazon Kindle Fire 7. the version from 2022 i believe, which i think is the most recent. it was the least expensive new tablet i could get.

it's in a foam case that looks like Spiderman! i chose all black because it's unobtrusive and goes with my aesthetic but it was also available in red with black eyes and some other colors

i currently use a board called vocal flair 112. i previously used quick core 112 and this is similar, but has a built in on screen keyboard. which means i get less buttons on the home page but it's fine because i found myself pulling up the keyboard frequently to fill in the gaps even with that many buttons.

here's a screenshot, i haven't edited this page, i just use it as the default:

i don't actually make it speak aloud often when im out in public. the person with me who's supporting me (usually my mom) reads my screen if i need to talk to someone else. this is almost purely out of anxiety. the fear that someone will not hear me the first time, that they wont listen or won't understand, that someone will overhear a robotic voice and stare, etc. but it's an improvement over my previous method of texting my mom, pointing at menus, and mumbling or whispering until i either gave up or she finally managed to hear me.

i use this feature in coughdrop to have her read the screen:

it's found under the "repeats" section. it makes a large button you can press to voice the selection or you can have someone else read it.

i also quickly wanted to show my two "advocacy" boards. one is a premade board that ive edited and the second is made by me from scratch. i think im going to combine them eventually, but ive been lazy about it

these don't reflect my current "public use" pronouns, but that's fine.

my speech has always been pretty intermittent and unreliable in some situations, but more recently ive experienced some skill regression that makes it harder than ever to use verbal speech. even when relaxed and comfortable, typing or using aac is easier for me. and when even slightly stressed or overwhelmed or even overly happy or excited, it's very hard to impossible to get any words out.

im hoping to get better about actually using the voice feature instead of showing people my screen. the only time ive ever actually used aac to communicate with a stranger i showed them my screen. i have a lot of anxiety about not being heard which im sure comes from the fact that my voice doesn't always work and that's pretty scary at times. it seems im both afraid of not being heard and being heard but being made fun of or dismissed. im not sure what would be worse.

anyway, sorry for the anxiety tangent.

im hoping to get a strap for the case soon so it's easier to carry around. i tend to have several things with me at all times, my phone, talker, Nintendo switch, my small backpack, and a stim toy or comfort item. it's nice when i manage to cut back on what im carrying and it works out well, but sometimes i just need all those things to get through a situation.

i don't actually own the coughdrop app. im using a free version. it times out after about 15 minutes and you have to exit and enter again, as well as other premium features not being available. i was hoping to eventually save up for it but the price has increased recently to the point where it is out of my budget. maybe if i get a job eventually? even then im not sure if i can justify the cost. the monthly price also went up, which sucks. c'est la vie.

if you have any questions at all, im happy to try to answer! inbox or ask box or reblogs or anything works.

thanks for reading!

[arytha]

orchid, cactus, bamboo, abelia, daffodil, mahonia, chia, camellia, jasmine, ivy, chamomile, aloe vera, palm tree, taro for get-to-know-me asks?

orchid ⇢ what’s a song you consider to be perfect?

I. So I don't consider things by 'perfection' honestly but Fuck is CLASS::EXSPHERE_NOSURGE; a song that will forever kick my ass. Absolute favourite song of all time.

cactus ⇢ something you’re currently learning (about)?

Waves my little Chinese Mandarin language learning app 'Hello Chinese' that helps (but with how i remember to do stuff i keep forgetting to do things) me remember that I actually did take 2 years of Mandarin in school.

bamboo ⇢ do you change into a different outfit when you get home?

Yeah I generally change out of my scrubs and into pjs. Usually a tank top and shorts 👍 be comfy

abelia ⇢ do you have a particular piece of jewelry you always wear or can’t part with?

Nope. Actually I used to wear a ring all the time, and then I lost it. And I used to wear a necklace all the time but I kept putting it in my mouth and it wore off the cheap silver coating. (for reference these were both while i was in middle school). I can't stand wearing jewelry daily anymore, it gets in the way.

daffodil ⇢ do you have siblings? if yes, in what ways do you think you’re similar to or different from them?

Yep, two younger brothers. I don't get along well at all with the older one (nothing in common at all), but the youngest has a similar humor as me and we're pretty good friends..

mahonia ⇢ what place, thing, activity inspires you most and how do you express yourself when it does?

Ehhhhh. Mainly reading inspires me the most honestly. Sometimes a song will also give me the executive function to create too, but it depends on whether I have the time to draw or write at the time!

chia ⇢ what’s an inside joke you have with someone else?

Logan and I have an adage we quote all the time which is simply: Don't worry about it.

Character is showing a weird side in a show we're watching? Oh, don't worry about it.

I make a weird noise? Don't worry about it.

Didn't catch the last half of a lewd joke or simply just a sentence he's said? Don't worry about it.

Its used more maliciously (in jest) than anything but its the funniest fucking thing we've let become a running joke.

camellia ⇢ what were you like when you were younger? do you think you’ve changed a lot?

Ah. Well, I basically wasn't a human being until 2018 or so, so.... Trauma (and clinical depression and overwhelming anxiety) did a number on me. Its actually rather hard to remember my life unless I focus on really trying to remember things. I was a lot quieter tho, read books to escape reality, and had like. No friends. I tried to validate myself through internet 'friends' and made a lot of mistakes in the pursuit of being a human. I have changed a lot (and I better have, i've healed and matured quite a bit), but I do think I still hold some of my core. qualities i think.

jasmine ⇢ do you have a movie or book you loved but will never watch/read again?

I'm never reading The Series of Unfortunate Events again. You can't make me. I LOVE the books. I cannot read them again. I Own the books (in nice shiny hardcover with the original printing, too), they are never going to be anything more than used space on my shelf.

ivy ⇢ what are your ‘tells’ for your emotions and moods? how can someone tell you’re happy, annoyed, upset or tired?

Uhhh my state of attentiveness I think. Logan says I enter 'screensaver mode' when tired but I'm not sure what actually changes. They can usually pinpoint it straight away tho fhdjs

Like if I'm more attentive and listening and engaging with you (ofc this is more for real life/voice call) im usually in a better state, I tend to tune things out when i get upset or tired or annoyed. Idk.

chamomile ⇢ what kind of things do you like receiving as gifts?

I have suuuuuch a soft spot for plushies. Its insane how soft I am over even just. a little guy. I don't even collect plushies but they always end up being my favorite present somehow. My coworker gave me a really soft Pusheen last year for my birthday(? or xmas) and god that thing lives at the end of my bed now but i was holding on to it daily for Months.

aloe vera ⇢ what’s something (mundane) you really want to experience in life?

Living in a house and not having anything in it that would deter me from. wanting to go home?This is a genuine first thought don't look into it too much..

palm tree ⇢ do you have a fictional villain you shouldn’t like but love regardless?

am i allowed to like the little shit that is Asahi from ffxiv (the answer is no. I love him tho (and Fandaniel))

taro ⇢ if someone called you right now to catch up, what’re the things you’d tell them about?

(if they're close enough) I'd probably talk a bit about my recent art for Era and Lorne? I don't have a life that's bery interesting unless you are willing to let me babble about my recent hyperfixations...

[mooifyourecows]

@eccentricsugar my research process isn't anything impressive tbh

It's mostly just a lot of googling and reading. if i find some good information that i think i might need/want to use then i'll screenshot it and either put it into an album in my phone i've designated specifically for that story, or i'll put it into my notes app where i've been writing down ideas. (usually i forget it exists and it gets lost in my screenshot album though lol oops)

i might also skim through pinterest for reference pictures for either the characters (tattoos, clothing styles, etc) or other physical attributes of the story like blueprints/layouts of buildings/apartments/homes/boats/etc. And sometimes I'll get on tiktok to see if i can find some educational videos from professionals to pick up on the jargon and intimate touches that you don't really get from textbook type research (this is difficult to get any real success from though because most tiktok videos that come up from searching are super unhelpful aesthetic posts with music playing over a shitty filter)(that or just total bullshit misinformation so... you know. when you stumble upon something actually helpful, it's like finding the holy fuckin grail)

I basically just google every question i have as it comes up. if i don't find the answers im looking for, i'll table it for the time being and come back to it later. sometimes when i search, i'll find NOTHING. but then a few months later when i search, i've learned a new way of wording it or something and suddenly i've got answers out the wazoo.

the brainstorming/researching stage of writing for me is an ongoing experience, so i don't really sweat about getting it all figured out ahead of time. i leave myself open to changing things if i learn they don't make sense or fit into the story and dont run myself ragged trying to become a professional on something that i could just as easily glaze over without losing too much of value in the narrative.

my goal is to know just enough not to sound like an idiot defying the laws of physics. if it's something that im genuinely interested in, i might go a little deeper into it, but since my writing focus is typically the characters and their relationships, i don't feel the need to get too wild and crazy with the research 🤙

[little-butterfly-writes]

Holidays Together

Hello! For @im-the-mystic-messenger Secret Santa, I had the pleasure of writing for @joy1579. I hope this is sweet for you to read and enjoy!

Word Count - 1,116

Warnings - Fluff. (Maybe a bit of time skipping but shhh)

Author's Note - This is Joy x Jumin. I hope I wrote your MC right!

Jumim's face pops up on the laptops screen, brows furrowed in frustration and confusion. You giggle under your breath so he won't hear.

"Did I do it right?" He sighs. You taught him how to use video chats a while ago, but he is still a bit unsure. Especially after system or app updates.

"Yes hun, I can see you well. Can you see me?" Elizabeth jumps onto your lap to see what you're talking to. Jumin's smile somehow seems brighter than it was before at this sight. Elizabeth settles in a comfy spot against you.

"My two favorite ladies. I can see you very well." You watch him shift a bit in his chair. "How are you, my princess?"

"I'm doing well, I just got off work a while ago. I miss you a lot. How are you doing?"

"Tired and busy. I miss you too." He does look more haggard than usual. "I will be home before the holidays. We can celebrate together."

"You'll be able to get lots of care and cuddles when you get back. I promise." You run your finger through Elizabeth's fur. Even though you understand Jumin's work, you can't help but feel lonely some days. He always assures you he'll be back soon and that Elizabeth will keep 

company. "My parents invited us over to have dinner and play board games. Would you be interested in joining them?"

"That sounds splendid. My dad is on a cruise with his new girlfriend that week, so it'll be nice to spend time with them." He clicks his tongue in disapproval at the girlfriend part, but otherwise seems happy. Excited even. Your parents love him and he loves them just as much. "We should get them gifts since we'll be attending."

"I was going to do that when you came back. I wanted your opinion on what to buy. Plus, I need to know what to get you." Jumin's pretty hard to buy gifts for. He has everything needs and has the money for anything he wants. It also doesn't help that he's stubborn, but you can be just as stubborn.

"You don't need to get me any gifts, Joy."

You immediately start to pout, Elizabeth joining you as best as she can. "Of course I'm going to get, or at least make, something for you! It's the day to celebrate and give gifts. I know you're going to spoil me again."

"Fine. I suppose I can't change your mind about it." There's a small smirk that you wish you could wipe off his face. But despite your best efforts to keep up, you let out a soft yawn. "It looks like you're tired. Go get some sleep, I'll be home soon. I love you, Joy."

"Love you too, Jumin." You hold up Elizabeth so she can meow goodbye before ending the call.

Few days pass before Jumin arrives home. He insisted the two of you went shopping even though you wanted him to rest. And then after instead of resting, he asked to help you wrap the gifts. 

Most of the gifts were new cookware and blankets, but Jumin helped you book tickets so they could go on vacation. 

"Ah, be sure to tape it there so it holds!" You chuckle as you continue to wrap the gift in front of you. Jumin's a quick learner, so it doesn't take him long to get into the groove of things. You can't let the photo opportunity go, so you snap a picture. This will be for you only, not for the messenger.

A week passes and the family gathering occurs. Time is spent together happily with home cooking.

After the dinner, Jumin helps you and your parents clean up as your sister brings out and sets up some board games. All of them are short games so you and Jumin can go back home for a private celebration. 

Of course, Jumin wins Monopoly and Clue, but you along with your family win card games Life. The games go on for a while with happy chuckles and playful teasing throughout. Even gift giving is full of joyful energy.

At the end of the gathering, you and Jumin give your goodbyes and tight hugs. You drive back to the penthouse because you know Jumin shouldn't drive and Driver Kim has until after New Year's off.

Jumin prepares some hot chocolate while you change into some fluffy pajamas. The two of you snuggle up on the couch, Elizabeth resting across the room on her bed. Jumin strokes the bit of teal that frames your face, then pushes your glasses further up your nose. You lean in to kiss his cheek.

"Did you enjoy yourself today?" It's a simple question, but you love it when he checks in on you.

"Of course I did. I was with my family and wonderful husband today. Did you enjoy yourself?" His fingers lace with yours.

"I did, very much. This is the best holiday I've had. It was spent with loved ones instead of alone. I thank you for bringing this joy to me." Jumin tucks you closer to his side, patting the top of your head softly.

"You don't have to thank me, hun. You're my love and I want you to be as happy as you make me." You lean into his hand. It always feels nice with the weight of his hand on your head.

"With you, I'll always be happy when you're with me. No matter how far apart." Jumin hums, his palm running down to rub your back. "Speaking of, I got you something from when I'm away."

You scrunch your nose. Jumin has already gotten you second hand books, shojo manga and some rare MLP:FIM trading cards. He had gotten you more?

Jumin hands you the box, wrapped carefully and topped with a bow. You gingerly tear away the wrapping paper and open the box. A small plush cat, looking like Elizabeth, has its paws curled slightly. There's a red sticker on it's paw that reads "Squeeze Here!" So you do, pressing lightly on there. And Jumin's voice rings out.

"My dear Joy, I love you so much. Cuddle me when you miss me. I'll be in your arms." The plush ends the message there.

"I'll always be with you. No matter what." Jumin squeezes you close.

"Thank you for this, Jumin. I know you can't always be with me because of work, but now you can be." You hold the plush tight in your arms, burying your face in his chest.

"I love you, princess. Happy holidays. "

"I love you the most, Jumin. Thank you for spending this holiday with me."

[kookiemydream]

BTS reaction → you miss them whilst they’re on tour

paring: bts x reader

warnings: crying if that triggers you, swearing!

genre: little bit of angst, fluff

a/n: bro omg the final livestream had me SHOOK.

ask box | about me 

↠ kim seokjin.

“Y/n? What are you still doing up? I swear it’s like really late where you are right now?” Jin said as soon as he picked up the phone

The silence that met him was enough for him to excuse himself from the rest of the boys and talk to you privately. He heard you sniffle which gave him the hint that you were crying.

“I just miss you, that’s all.” you replied softly, slightly embarrassed about the fact that you had to call him to feel at ease

“I know love, I miss you too.” Jin felt his heart break “But there’s not long now! Only two more weeks, and I’ll be home!

You nodded even though he couldn't see it. Hearing his voice was the comfort you needed, and Jin knew that.

So that’s why he carried on talking to you, telling you about the concerts and interviews they've had so far. He carried on talking until he heard a soft snore come from the other end of the line, signalling to him that you were asleep.

He whispered a ‘I love you so much’ before hanging up the phone, being comforted himself that you were okay.

↠min yoongi

When Yoongi got a text from you that read: ‘Can we talk’ his mind went straight the worst case scenario. Were you going to break up with him? Were you going to leave him for someone better? Were you dying?

Without hesitation, he pressed your name to call you, not even bothering to answer the text. When you eventually picked up after a few rings, he could instantly tell that something was off.

Usually, you’d greet him with a bright hello and maybe a question to follow about his day or what he was doing at that moment. Instead he got a small ‘hi’ and then nothing. That for Yoongi, was a massive red flag.

“What’s up baby? What did you want to talk about?” He attempted to break the ice just a little, just so you would feel more comfortable talking.

“I just needed to hear your voice. Is that okay?” you replied, putting the scenarios Yoongi had created to an abrupt end. “You might be busy I know, It’s stupid of me-”

Your boyfriends small chuckling cut you off “Y/n honey, don't you understand that you’re my first priority? You come first. Always.”

And so you talked. Him being all night. You being all day.

↠jung hoseok

“I think you should talk to her Hoseok.” his sister told him through the phone after seeing you today “She looks lost somehow. I don’t think she’s coping well with you being gone. And I don’t blame her!”

Hoseok sighed worriedly “I’ll talk to her I promise, thank you Jiwoo.”

He hung up the phone to her before switching to the skype app, thumb instantly tapping on your name. As much as it affected you him being away, it also affected him too. He would want nothing more than to snuggle up with you right now.

But obviously he didn’t have that luxury at this moment.

The first thing that Hoseok realised when the line did connect is that his sister was right. You looked like you hadn’t slept in days and at some point in that hour you had been crying which could be inferred from the redness of your eyes.

“Hey gorgeous!” He smiled lightly, just the sight of you making him feel more at home.

You copied his grin and replied “Hi Hobi.”

“So I heard you went to go see my sister today and apparently you didn’t look too well? Is everything alright my love?”

“Y-yeah! Everything is fine.” you bit your lip, avoiding any eye contact.

“Y/n.” Hoseok said deeply “Don’t lie to me. I know when something is playing on your mind, angel.” He watched take your sleeve and wipe your under eyes. 

“I’m struggling Hobi.” You finally sighed “Everyday, I think of how you’re not here and it makes me so fucking sad.” Your eyes quickly filled up with tears again.

“Oh honey. I miss you more than words can say.” His eyes didn’t leave the screen as you got up to get a tissue. When you came back he started again. “When I come back, we’re gonna go somewhere, just you and me.”

“Really?” you asked curiously.

“Absolutely. I’ll make you happy again, I promise.”

And Hoseok never breaks his promises.

↠kim namjoon

“There’s my beautiful princess!” Namjoon exclaimed as your face finally popped up on his screen. You grinned, rolling yours eyes at the pet name he had given you. “How you doing love?”

“It’s been okay I guess!” You answered while your eyes automatically scanned the empty apartment you were left with.

“What do you mean ‘i guess?’ Is something wrong?”

Seeing your boyfriends furrowed eyebrows on your screen made you chuckle “Yeah it’s just, I get lonely a lot more now. The house is pretty quiet without something breaking. You winked and laughed when he held his chest, as if you had shot him right in the heart.

“Y/nn, that was a low blow! I’m not that clumsy!” He yelled comedically.

“Yes you are!” You screamed back, still laughing at his expression. You both giggled and joked for a bit longer before his manager told him it was ready to go rehearse.

Before you both said goodbye and hung up he interrupted with a: “Y/n.”

“Yes, Joon?”

“I love you. I’ll be home soon, so just hang on for a little longer okay?”

You nodded “I will love.”

↠park jimin

When Jimin received a notification that you had sent him a video, his heart warmed at the thought of seeing your face again. However, when he saw that you were crying in it his heart did anything but warm.

Quickly, he punched the play button and painfully watched how your face screwed up with sadness.

“Hey baby, um I know this is kinda sad and stuff but.” Your voice broke and you quickly wiped your eyes. “I really miss you. Like REALLY really. I hate to admit it, but im struggling without you here. I just need to hear you. To smell you. To touch you. I miss your cuddles and your laugh. I just miss everything.”

You looked down from the camera, trying to hide your shame and embarrassment. Jimin sighed sadly as the video came to an abrupt end. Without even any hesitation whatsoever he got up the camera up and started to record himself.

“Hey beautiful, listen to me okay? You’re being so strong for the both of us right now and you don’t know how proud I am of you. Don’t get me wrong, I miss you so so so much but when we do see each other, it’ll be so much more special. Please carry on living your life. I’ll call you when the show is over. Not many shows now princess! I’ll be home soon!”

↠kim taehyung

“Yeontan!” Tae called over the phone, trying to get the puppies attention “Yeontan! It’s daddy! Look!” You laughed as your boyfriend waved frantically at the phone screen.

“I think he’s confused Tae.” you replied in exchanged of the dog “I don’t think he’s grasped the basics of technology yet!”

Taehyung giggled lightly “Ahhh I miss him so much, you don’t even know!”

“Oh I see.” You pouted “You don’t miss me at all then.” You comedically put your head in your hands and pretended to wipe a tear from your eyes. You saw Taehyung roll his eyes and smirk at your poor acting skills.

“Come on baby, you already know how much I miss you!” He put the screen closer to his face “I just wanna kiss those beautiful cheeks of yours.”

Now it was his turn to pout as he realised just how far both you and Yeontan were from him. The lack of cuddles and kisses you were missing out on really took a toll on you both. However you stayed strong for each other. That was the healthy thing to do.

“Only a couple days! And then you can kiss these cheeks as much as you want!” For more an effect, you squished both your cheeks together.

He laughed at how funny it made your face look before slowly quieting down and staring at you. You almost definitely noticed how silent he suddenly turned

“What? Is there something on my face?”

“No, I just can't wait to see you. Please don’t let Tannie forget about me, okay?”

“Trust me, it’d be pretty hard to forget you my love.”

↠jeon jungkook

When Jungkook had heard from one of his hyungs that they had gotten a really upsetting call with a extremely stressed you on the other end of the line, he wasn’t too thrilled.

He almost felt insulted that you, his girlfriend of two years, still wasn’t comfortable telling him what was wrong when you had an issue that was bothering you .

You knew you should’ve gone to him first. That was why your heart dropped when you saw his contact picture pop up on your screen, as you knew exactly why he was calling your phone.

“Y/n?” he greeted you immediately as soon as you accepted the call “What’s going on? Why did i have to hear from Namjoon - hyung that you were struggling? Why couldn’t you have just told me yourself?”

His tone of voice was stern but also dashed with slight worry. You knew he was lecturing you because he cared about you and he wanted you to feel comfortable. However you didn’t want to show your weakness so easily. You wanted to show that you were strong.

“I’m sorry Kookie.” you mumbled quietly, too ashamed to explain yourself properly.

You heard Jungkook sigh “I’m not angry at you pumpkin, it’s just frustrating that you’re hurting and i’m a thousand miles away. I just want to help you. But you need to open up for me to do that. Think you can do that bubba?”

You nodded even though you knew he couldn’t see you “I just miss you. I thought that maybe it might be a stupid reason to call you and cry about it so that’s why I went to Namjoon. I’m sorry baby.”

“Y/n, please don’t feel like your feelings are stupid. They’re so important so if you’re ever feeling sad or angry or anything like that, please call me. I love helping you. Because I love you. And I miss you more than words could ever say.”

“I love you, Jeon Jungkook.”

“I adore you more. Y/n Y/L/N.”

tell me what you think!

request a reaction/ scenario!

[5hfanfiction]

Too Close To Home - Chapter 16

Camila Cabello Had A One-Night-Stand With A Girl

A very surprising photo of singer Camila Cabello surfaced the internet today. This morning, a girl named Alycia Debnam posted a rather explicit photo (picture below) of the not-so-innocent Cuban-Mexican singer.

The girls were seen with a random girl whom we recognized as Alycia going out of a club late last night. There were also snaps of them in the club in Dinah's snapchat.

The photo was trending through every social medias and luckily, we managed to contact the woman who took the picture just a few hours ago.

“Yesterday, I was out at this club that just opened. That was the time I saw Camila [Cabello]. She was drunk and dancing in the middle of the dance floor. At first, I didn't remember how I knew her but something pulled me to her." She said.

"She looked at me invitingly and we danced through the night. She eventually brought me to her friends (current members of Fifth Harmony and Lauren's fiancé). That was when I realized who she was. But I didn't really fangirled then. We all played games and drank. It was fine and everything but at one point, Lauren [Jauregui] and Camila got quite moody.”

“It wasn't because of anything. I don't think they're not in bad terms. Actually, they seem quite close. Lauren seem to look at her [Camila] a lot." She said when we asked if the girls hated each other.

"For the short time I've been with Camila, she never once mentioned Lauren or anything that says that she was or is romantically involved with her. But what the hell do I know?”

So there you have it, Camilizers and Harmonizers.

We all know that the girls have been close this past year. With Camila birthday celebration and the outing they had last month. But how do you guys feel about the cute reunion? How about Camren, do you think they happened at one point? And more importantly, how's your reaction about Camila's picture? Was it surprising? Do you think she's gay, bi or just having fun? Comment your opinions below.

I scowl as I finish reading the article. Drama just keeps on coming to me. I don’t get it. What’s so interesting about a girl having fun? Everyone has sex once in a while.

The management would be so pissed. For years since I was in Fifth Harmony, they seem to push me towards the straight, pure and innocent girl but the photo just killed two birds with one stone.

The management knows about my sexuality. I actually told them right after I left Fifth Harmony, hoping that I was free enough to open up to the public. Unfortunately, they thought that I would get a wider audience if I stay in the closet for a few more years. I didn’t know anything then so I thought that they know better so I just complied.

But after more than a year staying in that claustrophobic closet, I felt the need to come out. So even if I’m quite sad that I got outed like that, deep inside, Im sort of happy that it’s out there. People know now.

But again, that wasn’t ideal. Who wants their naked picture on the internet for everyone to see? I’m just glad that she had the decency to at least not take a picture of my private parts.

How would my management react? They’re gonna be so mad. Would they fire me? Is that possible?

I start panicking at that thought. I’ve come so far, only to be demolished by a meaningless one-night stand. Oh My God. Are people going to label me as a slut now? Haters are pretty simple minded and I’m sure they would think that. I’m sure they would think that I do that often, only to be caught now. But I’ve never done that before.

Alycia is honestly the second person I’ve ever had sex with. The first being Lauren. I was just so frustrated and so dry from 2 years that I thought that it was a good idea. Basically, I was driven by desire and lust. Is that why people say that you can’t make decisions according to desire? Is this my backlash for not listening to Lauren? Is this my karma? Is karma even a thing?

I start panicking more now. My eyes are blurry from the tears that seems to pour out when I was thinking. My breathing is hectic and shaky. I grab my phone and luckily, I know where the contact app are and clicked at the first option I could find.

Of course, the universe being a usual bitch, Lauren came through the line.

“Hello?” She asks. She is seriously the last person I wanna call. I’m kind of embarrassed because I didn’t listen to her. I thought that she was only thinking about her own feelings, that’s another factor that pushed me to sleep with Alycia. But now that what she warned me is actually happening, I can’t help but feel ashamed.

“Camz?” She repeats since I haven’t answered her, “Are you okay? You’re breathing really loudly.”

“I-I’m fi-ne,” I croak out, even if it wasn’t as convincing as I hoped it would be.

“What happened?” She asks.

Again, I didn’t reply. I was too busy thinking about how to end the call before it becomes obvious that I’m panicking.

“Camz?? What’s happening? You’re scaring me.”

I take a deep breathe, trying to compose myself but failing miserably since she asks, “Are you having a panic attack? I’m coming to your room.”

“Do-ont, I’m oka-y.”

“Too late.”

A knock comes a few moments later, indicating that she’s here already so I can’t really do anything but open it.

After a minute attempting to open the door with my shaky hand, I succeeded and Lauren immediately barge into the room.

“Camz.. are you okay?”

I just look at her with my blurry eyes and she knows what’s happening. She wraps her arms around my, releasing endorphins into my body, immediately making me calmer. She then led me to the couch, still wrapping her arms around me while we sit.

After what took about 15 minutes, my breathing finally becomes normal, she releases her hold and lean back.

She takes her phone out and punch a few numbers. She brings her phone to her ear while still holding me with her other arm.

“Hey Dinah… Yeah I know… I can’t come today… I’ll go tomorrow… I’m sorry… It’s just that this is more important… I’ll record it tomorrow… Can you tell the producers I’m sorry… Yeah, thanks.”

And with that, she puts her phone back to her back pocket and continues putting her energy on trying to calm me.

“I’m sorry,” I mutter.

“What? Why?”

“I’m sorry I called you. I’m sure you would’ve preferred doing anything else than this. I’m also sorry that I didn’t listen to you when you warned me about her. If I listened, this wouldn’t have happened.”

“What happened?”

“You haven’t checked your social media?” I ask.

“No?”

“Well, long story short, the girl I hooked up with took a picture of me whilst I was asleep and posted them so now, everyone knows I hooked with a girl.”

“Damn… Was that why you had a panic attack? The fact that you got outed?”

“I mean, honestly, I don’t mind that part.. It wasn’t how I pictured it but it was long overdue. I just don’t know how the management will react. I have a feeling that they’re gonna call me for a meeting or something soon.”

“Well, you know what?” She asks rhetorically, reaching out to take my phone from the coffee table, shutting it off before putting it back, “today’s your last day before you have to go back on the road, they can’t take that away from you. So what do you wanna do today?”

“I was planning on having a lazy day before performing tomorrow.”

“Then we’ll do just that,” she responds, leaning against the couch, turning on the TV in front of us with the remote.

“Wait.. You’re staying?”

“Yeah? Why not?”

“I-” I start, “nevermind.”

She lets it go and just watches the TV. We fell into a comfortable silence. I don’t know what happened but at one point, our shoulders touch, causing warmth to spread through my body. The simplest touch could do this to me, imagine if we were kissing.

We spent about an hour staring at the TV, barely talking. But I wasn’t even watching the show, I was busy side-eyeing Lauren’s profile subtly.

“You know, staring is deemed rude in some culture..” she says at one point, still watching whatever’s in front of her.

“Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. I was just joking. Actually, please stare some more, it’s actually boosting my self-esteem,” she jokingly says as she turns her head to me.

“Jerk..” I say, causing her to laugh loudly.

Her laugh dies down after a minute. We just sat there, looking at each other. The mood shifts suddenly when she asks, “did you remember what happened yesterday?”

“Barely.. I drank a tad bit much.”

“Uhh, well.. Do you remember when we played Truth or Dare?”

I crack my head open, trying to recall everything that happened. Luckily, I begin to remember chronologically instead of those typical flashes of scattered memory that just makes people’s head spin some more. I smile as I remember Normani and Dinah kissing like there was no tomorrow.

But then.. Lauren. My heart constricts as I recall what Lucy said. The memory seemed vivid enough and I can’t help but feel hurt again. I know it happened a long time ago, but it still didn’t help. It felt like Lauren is now deliberately scratching my almost dried bruise, making the bruise raw again.

“I’m sorry,” she releases. She probably knows what I’m thinking about from my facial expression, “I wanted to tell you. But-”

“When?”

“What?” She cocks her head, narrowing her eyes as a sign of confusion.

“You said you planned on telling me. When did you plan it?” I raise one of my leg up to the couch so I could fully turn towards her.

She looks dumbfounded, she didn’t anticipate that I was going to ask that. I knew she just wanted to say what I want to hear. If it wasn’t for Lucy, I probably wouldn’t have known.

She said we were best friends, even before we happened. But why was Lucy never a subject? Were we even friends in the first place? If so, why didn’t I know jackshit about this?

“I thought so,” I sigh, defeated. “You weren’t really sorry for not telling me, you were sorry that you got caught. It’s different.”

She looks down at her knotted fingers, a few tears seem to flow down her cheeks to her jaw, collecting tears at her chin.

“But it’s okay,” I began, making her snap her head in my direction, “it doesn’t really matter now anymore.” Her hopeful expression faded at my last statement.

It’s true though. As much as I’m mad about it, what good would it do to dwell on it further? Yes, I feel betrayed and deceived, but at the end of the day, Lucy is still her endgame. So why the hell would it matter if they had history before?

“Yeah..” she sighs.

“On a more pleasant note, Im glad you found your The One,” I smile, a sad one but a smile nevertheless, “Remember when we were 15 and 16? We dreamed about being famous. We talked about boys and how you want to marry the person who you know before we were well-known. You also wanted the person to be so similar to you, having the same thoughts and knowledge. I’m glad that Lucy reaches all your expectations, eventhough she’s a girl.”

She laughs softly now, tears still streaming down her face, “Indirectly, I think I was talking about you. We-”

“Stop,” I interrupt, “just stop.” I was hurt already, I don’t think I need another trip down memory lane. I’m emotionally tired. I’m already in pain. I feel so drained already and it’s still a little after 2pm. My brain is pounding, my heart is aching painfully, I’m looking at the girl that got away. What good would it do to talk about the days where everything was fine - great even - and simple?

“Sorry..” she mutters.

And at that, we continue watching the movie. But the stupid elephant was back and just stared at us. The tension was thick and I felt the need to lighten the situation.

“You wanna try writing on a song together?” Just yesterday, we made a deal to write a song together so why not do it now?

“You wanna do it now?” she asks.

“Now is as good as any.” I walk to my room, only to come back with a pen and my journal. The journal has a few deep entries but most of them were just ramblings and scattered song lyrics I don’t really use. The journal is leathery and white, with my name imprinted in front of the book.

I place the journal down at the coffee table and slide down to sit on the carpeted floor. She followed suit, causing our knees to brush each other. I move my knees up so it doesn’t touch, to somewhat create a barrier between her and me. She frowned when she realized what I’m doing but said nothing.

“So what song do you want it to be about?” I ask as I open to a fresh page, free from any type of ink.

“Love,” she says without a beat,.

“What about love?”

“A dead relationship,” she says with such simplicity. I squint my eyes, confused as to why she wants to write that since there’s nothing wrong with their relationship. Just as I want to ask she beats me to it by interpolating, “it’s not based on Lucy, it’s based on any relationship in general. An internal battle between whether they should break up or not.”

“Right,” I say, still unconvinced but decidedly lets it go.

We spend at about 30 minutes discussing about the base of the song.

Lauren’s phone rang from her back pocket. She takes it out, Lucy’s name temporarily imprinted on the phone.

“Hey baby… Oh, I’m at Camila’s.. Oh, okay.. Yeah, I don’t mind, take your time. We’re just chilling here so it’s okay.. Yeah, alright… You too,” she says through the phone. I can’t really hear the other side of that conversation so I don’t really know what’s happening. She ends the call after that, putting her phone on top of the coffee table.

“Lucy?” I say in the least noisiest way possible.

“Yeah, she said a friend is in LA and they’re going out.” This was another thing I see in Lauren. The amount of trust she has on Lucy is huge.

Back when we were together, it was hard. Lauren was a very possessive person and she was jealous at the littlest thing I do. We fought about it a lot; whether it’s about a guy I clearly have no interest in like Shawn or a girl I only see as a friend like Ariana or Taylor. No matter what I do to try to reassure her, she was too hard-headed to trust me.

Hell, even now… Just two days ago, she was jealous of Ariana. It kind of hurts, knowing that Lauren has never trusted me the way she trusts Lucy.

We spent the next few hours conveying our thoughts and feelings to the song. It was easy writing with her, probably because we have some kind of bond that I don’t seem to have with the other songwriters I’ve worked with. Lauren understands me to a personal level and vice versa.

At the end of the day, we seem to be pretty proud of our creation - or our baby if you must.

The only obstacle now is how to convince the label to include Lauren for the song. I want her on it because she deserves it just as much, if not more.

[transssexualheart]

Do all, entertain me so I don't have to do hw

ah man i was actually doing hw for once

1- my name?rain

2- do i have any nicknames?my mom calls me rainbow, my brother calls me ron, my friends don’t really call me by any nicknames anymore

3- zodiac sign?leo, borderline virgo 

4- video game i play to chill, not to win?animal crossing

5- book/series i reread?harry potter

6- aliens or ghosts?uhhhh ghosts

7- writer i trust enough to read anything they write?idk if there’s any

8- favorite radio station?i don’t listen to the radio much

9- favorite flavor of anything?watermelon or blue raspberry

10- the word i use all the time to describe something great?idk, i say hell yeah a lot

11- favorite song?robbers by the 1975 probably (im listening to it now lol)

12- the question you ask new friends to get to know them better?i usually ask what they’re doing when we text and they tell and through this over time you hear about their family and intrests

13- favorite word?either “soft” or “gentle”

14- last person who hurt me, did i forgive them?not sure, i think i was the last person to hurt me, and i don’t really forgive myself for anything

15- last song i listened to?robbers by the 1975

16- tv show i always recommend?rick and morty

17- pirates or ninjas?see on one hand i have gay pirates and on the other i have nsp so idk

18- movie i watch when i’m feeling down?probably some pokemon movie lmao

19- song that i always start my shuffle with/wake up song/always on loop song?my alarm is nine in the afternoon by p!atd, i usually shuffle the fiddler on the roof soundtrack starting with the wedding dance song or now i have everything, on loop i usually have do i wanna know by arctic monkeys or sarah smiles by p!atd

20- favorite video games?any pokemon game

21- what am i most afraid of?the people i love secretly hating me or abandoning me or dying

22- a good quality of mine?uhhhhh,,, i guess um. my hair is dark? so it makes it easier to see facial hair and shit on me which is helpful for my trans ass

23- a bad quality of mine?i can’t shut up about anything i’m interested in bc i obsess myself with things that make me happy and always want to talk about them because they’re the the things that keep me alive but it gets annoying and i get a lot of “would you shut up about this subject”

24- cats or dogs?how could i CHOOSE

25- actor/actress you trust enough to watch whatever they’re in?i don’t pay a lot of attention to the actors for ppl in movies, i think the only actor i was willing to go see whatever they were in was u lmao

26- favorite season?spring/autumn

27- am i in a relationship?no

28- something i miss?the way things used to be sometimes

29- my best friend? i’ve considered u my best friend for a long time, if i didn’t delete messages u could probably find me talking to newer ppl (mainly chloe, who was that girl i asked out and rejected me) being like “yeah so she’s my best friend and she’s great”

30- eye color?brown

31- hair color?dark brown

32- someone i love?diakjgbjfgvldgjh

33- someone i trust?i trust u and zee the most

34- someone i always think about?Get Out Of This Home

35- am i excited about anything?dying

36- my current obsession?playing amazing grace on the piano

37- favorite tv shows as a child?i loved sesame street

38- do i have someone of the opposite sex i can tell everything to?not really

39- am i superstitious?idk

40- what do i think about most?what the fuck do you think 

41- do i have any strange phobias?i don’t think so

42- do i prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it?not sure

43- favorite hobbies?drawing, writing, playing piano

44- last book i read?the great american whatever, great book btw, read it if ur looking for more gay books. warning though for death (that’s not really a spoiler i promise)

45- last film i watched?blue is the warmest color, didn’t finish it tho

46- do i play any instruments?piano

47- favorite animals?cats and dogs

48- top 5 blogs on tumblr that i follow?@ dreamts@ maroonracoon@ hugables@ roswater@ fauning

49- superpower i wish i could have?to pause time

50- how do i destress?what

51- do i like confrontation?no

52- when do i feel most at peace?when i sleep

53- what makes me smile?hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

54- do i sleep with the lights on or off?off

55- play any sports?no

56- what is my song of the week?idk the week just started my guy

57- favorite drink?grape juice

58- when did i last send a handwritten letter to somebody?idk

59- afraid of heights?not really

60- pet peeve?when u tell someone to stop fuckin touching u and they keep doing it immediately after

61- what was the last concert i went to see?the 1975!! just last night

62- am i vegetarian/vegan/pescatarian?no 

63- what occupation did i want to do when i was younger?i really wanted to be a singer

64- have i ever had a friend turn into an enemy?i’ve had fights with friends but we either made up or stopped being friends but aren’t enemies

65- what fictional universe would i like to be a part of?idk

66- something i worry about?friends when they’re sad, i know some of them probably won’t but i still worry about them hurting themselves

67- scared of the dark?yeah

68- who are my best friends?you, zee, shannon, spencer, i could go on but there’s a lot

69- what do i admire most about others?musical abilities, especially with singing

70- can i sing?idk, logically i have no reason to think that i can’t because literally everyone that’s ever heard me sing says it’s not bad or that i have a nice voice but i’m still unconvinced

71- something i wish i could do?sing in front of people without having an anxiety attack, speaking of singing

72- if i won the lottery, what would i do?buy myself and my friends a ton of shit probably

73- have i ever skipped school?i’ve faked being sick to get out of school

74- favorite place on the planet?idk man i haven’t been many places

75- where do i want to live?kinda wanna live in nyc

76- do i have any pets?cat named danny, two fish one named goldy and the other shaneeta dee

77- what is my current desktop picture?an nsp concert but i’ve been meaning to change it for a while now

78- early bird or night owl?night owl

79- sunsets or sunrise?sunsets

80- can i drive?no

81- story behind my last kiss?it was so long ago man i can’t really remember

82- earphones or headphones?earphones

83- have i ever had braces?no

84- story behind one of my scars?idk if i have any but i have a scab that i picked at until it bled in piano class because i was Not Ok and many times after for the same reason and that’s probably gonna scar now

85- favorite genre of music?idk

86- who is my hero?idk

87- favorite comic book characters?i don’t really read comic books much

88- what makes me really angry?when people hurt my friends 

89- kindle or real book?real book

90- favorite sporty activity?idk man

91- what is the one thing that isn’t tight in schools that should be???????

92- what was my favorite subject at school?idk man i guess art is ok but i’m not the biggest fan of my teacher

93- siblings?two, one brother and a sister

94- what was the last thing i bought?probably food

95- how tall am i?i think 5′5

96- can i cook?i can make grilled cheese and also pancakes

97- can i bake?if u give me a recipe then probably

98- 3 things i love?my friendspianosleeping

99- 3 things i hate?donald trumpdepressionanxiety

100- do i have more girl friends or boy friends?idk a lot of my friends are non binary or i don’t know their gender

101- who do i get on with better, girls or boys?im tempted to say girls but that’s just bc i have a preference for girls romantically in reality it doesn’t really matter as long as u aren’t a dick

102- where was i born?albany

103- sexual orientation?pan, probably somewhere on the ace spectrum bc sexual attraction is so so rare for me so if i think ur hot u better believe u are

104- where do i currently live?new york

105- last person i texted?you

106- last time i cried?not sure, i think last week when i had that big meltdown that y’all saw where @ hero-art was sending me asks through it

107- guilty pleasure?hhgghg,,hggg, watching vids of u singing

108- favorite youtuber?probably still the game grumps

109- a photo of myselfdamn bitch just search the tag # rain shows you his face

110- do i like selfies?i take a lot, usually just because my makeup looks cool that day, but they’re mostly shit

111- favorite game app?i don’t play game apps

112- my relationship with my parents?:/

113- favorite accents?idk man

114- a place i have not been but would like to visit?metropolitan museum of art

115- favorite number?five

116- can i juggle?no

117- am i religious?no

118- do i like space?it’s cool

119- do i like the deep ocean?it’s pretty

120- am i much of a daredevil?lol no

121- am i allergic to anything?i think grass

122- can i curl my tongue?yeah

123- can i wiggle my ears?no

124- do i like clowns?don’t really have an opinion on them

125- the beatles or elvis?i don’t listen to either of them

126- my current project?my dumbass lab writeup

127- am i a bad loser?i don’t think so

128- do i admit when i’m wrong?yes

129- forest or beach?beach

130- favorite piece of advice?“love everyone, forgive everyone, especially yourself.”

131- am i a good liar?i think so

132- hogwarts house/divergent faction/hunger games district?i’m a gryffindor and i didn’t read divergent or the hunger games

133- do i talk to myself?all the time

134- am i very social?no

135- do i like gossip?maybe? idk as long as no one is hurt

136- do i keep a journal/diary?i guess my writing blog is kind of an over exaggerated diary

137- have i ever hopelessly failed a test?i got a zero on a quiz once if that counts

138- do i believe in second chances?depends

139- if i found a wallet full of cash on the ground, what would i  do?get my mom to turn it in to ppl who know what to do with it

140- do i believe people are capable of change?yeah i suppose, but depends

141- have i ever been underweight?no

142- am i ticklish?very

143- have i ever been in a submarine?no

144- have i ever been on a plane?when i was seven

145- in a film about my life, who would i cast as myself, friends, and family?ah man idk i don’t have an extensive knowledge of actors

146- have i ever been overweight?no

147- do i have any piercings?one in each ear

148- what fictional character do i wish was real?idk

149- do i have any tattoos?two, one on my ankle and another on my ass

150- what is the best decision i have made in my life so far?to realize that i fucked up and to apologize

151- do i believe in karma?i guess

152- do i wear glasses or contacts?i need glasses but don’t wear them much

153- what was my first car?none

154- do i want children?depends on who i’d have them with

155- who is the most intelligent person i know?idk man it’s kinda subjective isn’t it?

156- my most embarrassing moment?my whole entire life

157- what makes me nostalgic?old songs

158- have i ever pulled an all nighter?oh yeah

159- which do i value most in others, brains or beauty?brains

160- what color dominates my wardrobe?idk actually

161- have i ever had a paranormal experience?not really

162- what do i hate most about myself?i’m stupid, i hurt and bother others way too much 

163- what do i love most about myself?ok i’m honestly not being a self loathing dick on purpose here i genuinely can’t think of something i love about myself

164- do i like adventure?yeah

165- do i believe in fate? maybe

166- favorite animal?question already asked bro

167- have i ever been on radio?no

168- have i ever been on tv?no, but yesterday i got asked to be (i declined because of anxiety)

169- how old am i?fourteen

170- one of my favorite quotes?“and you know that it’s not good, that there is no good, that nothing good can ever come out of it. but you do it anyway. and then... well. and then you burn.”

171- do i hold grudges?depends

172- do i trust easily?i don’t think so

173- have i learnt from my mistakes?yeah

174- best gift i’ve ever received?well my computer was p good though i payed for part of it

175- do i dream?yeah

176- have i ever had a night terror?yeah

177- do i remember my dreams, and what is the one that comes to mind?i do, and i just remembered the dream i had where there was this weird ass magical storm by my school that happened once thousands of years before on the same day and ppl thought it was a myth but it wasn’t, it was controlled by some ghost of a little girl and it lasted for weeks and eventually within our small shelter by the school people just died arbitrarily and some died from the storm who went out to try and get food and some starved, and soon all that was left was me and three others and it was horrible because every time we closed our eyes we were afraid we were going to open them and someone would be dead

178- an experience that has made me stronger?idk. probably my dad dying?

179- if i were immortal what would i do?try and undo that immortality or send myself into a coma forever because god i already want to die having to live forever would be the biggest curse ever

180- do i like shopping?sure

181- if i could get away with a crime, what would i do?idk man i don’t think about a life of crime much

182- what does family mean to me?people who care about me and love me and that i care about and love back

183- what is my spirit animal?im p sure that as a white person i’m not supposed to have one

184- how do i want to be remembered?for kindness

185- if i could master one skill, what would i choose?being better at piano

186- what is my greatest failure?everything

187- what is my greatest achievement?don’t know, i’m not proud of many things that i do

188- love or money?love

189- love or career?love

190- if i could time travel, where and when would i want to go?nowhere, i don’t want to spoil the future for myself and i don’t want to fuck with the past

191- what makes me the happiest?FUCK off

192- what is “home” to me?being with someone i love

193- what motivates me?i don’t know. not much anymore

194- if i could choose my last words, what would they be?idk, it depends on who i’d say them to

195- would i ever want to encounter aliens?if they’re nice then yes

196- a movie that scared me as a child?coraline

197- something i hated as a child that i like now?idk

198- zombies or vampires?vampires bc baz

199- live in the city or the suburbs?city

200- dragons or wizards?wizards

201- a nightmare that stayed with me?so this is from when i was little, my dad was driving my brother and i to the park and i was in the backseat bc i was tiny. so i said something to him and got no reply, i looked over and he wasn’t in the front seat, he was gone and nobody was driving. i look out the front and we’re headed for a part where we were meant to turn and there’s a giant steep hill and the car just keeps going forwards. it drives up the hill then flips over and crashes and rolls back down the hill and then i woke up

202- how do i define love?oh gosh. it’s in trusting other people to tell everything, even if they don’t “get” you, even if they won’t understand what you mean or how you feel because you trust them. it’s in the way you feel accepted around them. and all the inside jokes and knowing glances and doing everything you can to help when they’re down and feeling at home around them.

203- do i judge a book by it’s cover?a little

204- have i ever had my heart broken?yeah

205- do i like my handwriting?not really

206- sweet or savory?sweet

207- worst job i’ve had?never had a job

208- do i collect anything?ramune bottles and pokemon cards 

209- item of clothing or jewelry you’ll never see me without?don’t think there is one

210- what is on my bucket list?kiss a girl

211- how do i handle anger?vent to a friend

212- was i named after anyone?not with my first name, but my mom gave me my middle name after her friend from college

213- do i use sarcasm a lot?no.............of course not

214- what tv character am i most like?not sure

215- what is the weirdest talent i have?talent. What Is That

216- favorite fictional character?how could i choose one

thanks for asking  

[btsstankate-blog]

Busy Train Ride

Hello to who ever is actually reading this, so this is my first scenario and if you didn't know.. i only write smuts scenarios and reactions for Namjoon and Jin.

Summary- You meet Namjoon on the train and it leads into an exciting experience. 

Category: Scenario

Members- Namjoon and You

- tO ALL MY NAMJOON BIASES -

I KINDA GOT CARRIED AWAY WITH THIS SCENARIO AND WROTE ALOT AND STILL AM NOT FINSHED AS THERE WOULD BE A PART 2 COMING SO BE READY💙.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You were coming home from a late night dance practice and you worked so hard to fix any mistakes and got all the choreography perfected. You lived 10 minutes away from your dance studio so everyday when you came home you had to take the crowded train back home. It was 1am Tuesday night and that is the time you usually leave practice based on your Tuesday schedule. You particularly are new for 3 months in that dance studio as you transferred from another months ago. Dance was your passion and you had a dream to become a professional dancer one day. You loved hip hop dancing as you have been winning several dance competition awards with your dance group. 

You walked 2 blocks to the train station and saw your train was coming in 3-5 minutes. You exhausted from the hard work you put in for your hip hop solo. You just played on your phone for about 5 minutes checking your social media apps and playing games until you actually fell asleep on the bench waiting for your train to arrive. About 10 minutes later you woke up to an announcement that your train will be delayed for about 5 minutes extra because it was running late anyway while you were asleep. Your so glad you didn't miss it. You drunk the rest of your water and waited patiently for your train to arrive.

Once your train arrived your small self squished in between people who are pushing themselves into the train as there were no seats of course that you can sit in as you were very tired from your dance practice tonight. You held on the train pole firmly and tightly hoping not to fall since you were little stumbly and kind of dizzy from you being so fatigued.  You were also hungry and didn't eat dinner before you came home. All you had was a sandwich for lunch and a bottle of water. 

About 4 minutes unto the train ride it just got more and more crowded with a LOT of people. It has never been this packed at this time that you have been on this train. You wondered to yourself why it was. Suddenly when the train made a sharp turn the pressure and force of the people standing and holding the pole bars and such pushed you so hard that you lost balance and completely fell on top of the one and only Kim Namjoons lap.

You at the time didn't know who Kim Namjoon was and you weren't too familiar with the group: BTS

You: “Oh my god I'm so sorry about that!” You said as you and Namjoon are helping picking yourself up.

You: “You see the train turned and i lost balance and due to everyones pressure I fell but I'm so sorry..”

Namjoon- “Its okay, its totally fine i understand. Are you okay are you hurt”? he asked while all eyes of the other passengers were staring on you.

You: “Yeah I'm totally fine just might have a couple of bruises but besides that I'm ok” You said nervously and embarrassed trying to catch your breath.

Namjoon:” At least your okay ..it could've been worse!” Namjoon said trying to make the best out of the situation.

You: “Exactly” you said lastly.

Luckily, after seeing you fall a nice gentleman gave up his seat as you looked tired and overall because he felt bad you got embarrassed and fell in front of literally a whole train of people.

You: “Thank you” you said as you walked towards the seat. It was in front of Namjoons so basically you were facing eachother. The train started to get less packed by each stop.

For the rest of the 7 minutes train ride you couldn't stop thinking about how handsome Namjoon was. You kind of were glad that he was able to help you up and be all nice when you fell. You tried not to maintain eye contact and just sat there deep in your thoughts during the rest of the train ride back home.

In Namjoons Mind:- He actually was still very concerned for you after the fall but couldn't stop thinking about how beautiful you are. It was literally love at first sight. He stole little glances at you here and then to see if you were okay and to see if you got out the train finally and also because of how god damn gorgeous you are to him. 

On the other hand, Namjoon was going back to the dorm after a night out with his manager. His manager went home with his wife as they lived about  5 blocks away from the BTS dorm. That left Namjoon to take the train all the way back to his dorm as the night out was in a unpaticular area he never been to but his manager nicely told him where his stop was suppose to be.

Suddenly it was 1 minute until you got off the train as it was approaching your stop to go finally home and once you got off quickly to avoid anything else from happening and to just want to be home at last, you heard a voice particular to the man (Namjoon) who you fell on top of.

Namjoon- :”Exuse Me!” he said walking fast practically running trying to catch up to you as of how fast you were going home.

Namjoon- “Exuse Me Mrs!”

You turned around to the sound of his voice as your eyes came practically big at the sight of Namjoon that made your stomach flutter.

As soon as you turned back he finally watched up to you.

You were practically leaving the train station when he told you-

Namjoon; “Hi, *out of breath* i just wanted to say that your beautiful and we should be friends or hang out someday..”

You: *you were suddenly shocked at the words coming out of his mouth as you smiled shyly covering half of your smile.

You: Thank you! I actually not going to lie i think your very cute and handsome and sure maybe we can get to know each other more!” You said trying not to blush but failed miserably.

Namjoon- *Namjoon telling that you were kinda shy*

“Also, again don't worry about the fall i know how you feel its totally understandable.”

You: “Thanks i appreciate it, it was kinda embarrassing.. but I'm okay.”

Namjoon- Thats all that matters..Anywway my name is Rap Monster I'm the leader from the kpop group/boy band BTS I'm not sure if you have heard of it and basically we live in a dorm 5 blocks from here.

You: “Oh wow i live right here on Talé Street! It’s really not that far! I actually never heard of your  boy group but now i will find more about it for sure!”  you said.

Namjoon- “Im actually coming from a night out with my manager.. but without the boys”

You: “Oh cool i just came from my dance practice and I'm extremely tired.” You said.

Namjoon- Maybe we can meet up with each other and maybe the boys?

You: “Sure!I would love to it seems like fun!”

Namjoon- Trust me.. it will. Anyways do you mind if i get your number so ic an contact you?

You: “Oh yeah sure!” you said as you hurriedly told him your number.

Namjoon- I will text you when we can meet when I'm off at the dorm.

You: “Sounds Good!” you said satisfied. “Okay see you later” you said, walking away in amazed shock from what just happened.

Namjoon- “Goodbye!” said Namjoon as he turned the other way and headed back to board the train that was already there back to the next  2  blocks that the dorm was from your city.

In the meantime, you hurriedly went through the cold dark streets of Talé Stret you were scared if anything will happen as you always hated coming home late at this time from dance and you kept overthinking still and you mind hasn't yet still processed that your love at first sight crush just planned to be friends with you and that he liked you.

Namjoon, still on the train, couldn't wait to tell the BTS members back at the dorm about this exciting experience.

SO as you can see, this is such a long scenario.. i know but part 2 will be coming soon and this might have grammar or punctuation mistakes because it is late its 11pm and i kinda am in rush to fix it and yeah.

Im new to doing these types of things and this is my first fandom fan account on tumblr. Please follow and request any scenarios , smuts , fluffs, reactions, angsts, etc ONLY I REPEATN ONLY FOR NAMJOON OR JIN I DO NOT WRITE FOR OTHER MEMBER THIS INCLUDES SUGA, JUNGKOOK, V, JHOPE, OR JIMIN. SO BASICALLY NAMJIN THE COUPLE OF THE GROUP LMFAO.

Follow my fandom army twitter @BtstrashK & my 2 youtubes - cookies cookie and - hobis’ hope.

Don't forget to vote for bts for the bbmas and its tomorrow and voting ends depending on your time zone.

Bye & Stay AWsome!