#but at the same time these two arn’t afraid to tell people how much they mean to each other

[depressedhatakekakashi]

long ask and kinda random but- wouldn't it be so funny if two characters are shown throughout a story, not together just yet but it is confirmed they know each other. They talk about each other constantly, and you wouldn't notice it at first glance but man its there once you notice it.

Character A is the type that is very friendly and casual, suddenly becomes polite, maybe even a bit too polite and almost distant talking about them (in a way thats obviously them restraining themselves) to the point u can't quite tell if they do genuinely care but they do know a lot about the other. Meanwhile, Character B has been cursed with a resting bitch face and makes talking about anyone sound like theyre insulting them. Their very short way of speech does not help especially out of context and without proper explanation (think; "I would chain them down to a chair if i could." But they meant that as in out of worry since A is so fucking reckless. Its maddening.) Anyways, other people think A is suddenly polite (out of apprehension?? being wary?? noone knows) but otherwise willing to talk about them (B) nicely. While people think B whose normally calm and relaxed, is always very pissed at A (yes and also no.)

The first time their on screen together basically amounts to a huge explosion on both ends with Character A nervous and unsure how to introduce them but reluctantly settles with simply. "Oh. their a good friend of mine." but B who is normally pretty quiet, just. absolutely goes off. "friend?? FRIEND??? We did not go through the shit we did, and survived together for the shit we went through for you to just call me a good friend."

listen its till death do us part in this household, i am your comrade in arms, your ride or die when you plan on overthrowing the government. I may only know maybe 2/5 of your hobbies but i know what you look like in near terror at the thought of ur loved ones being threatened and rising up in the flames of fury to protect them, and then a sobbing mess when you finally break down. Friend is fine but also man you could do to hype me up more over here-

I just need two emotionally contipated besties on opposite sides of the spectrum is that so much to ask- (also loudmouth and friendly but distant x quiet and stern but also ball of emotion ready to explode, is 💞)

Oh, this is a dynamic i’d actually love to see more of. The ‘are they friends or do they hate each other? I’m getting mixed signals here’ but then you see them in a room together and realize ‘oh, ‘friends’ doesn’t even BEGIN to describe what they two are’

No one has a definitive answer

They’ll kill for each other but also be the first to stop each other from killing

They’ll bite anyone who insults the other, but character B always seems ready to insult character A at a moment’s notice yet never does.

These two are thicker than theives. They’re the best of friends yet so much more. The very concept of their bond is too difficult for any mere moral to understand. Even the gods don’t understand what the heck is going on with these two.

I can think of a few pairings that sort of match this but also, this is so very specific and perfect i wouldn’t want to try and assign it to any character because it’s just…

Easily the best pairing ever. Thank you anon your brain is SO BIG.

[growingingreenwood]

So basically the reason I’m feeling so alone is because I’m nonbinary and I’m out to my friends and they’re really supportive and that’s really nice but I’m not out to my parents because they’re transphobic and lately I’ve just been really dysphoric and every time I hear them use my dead name or incorrect pronouns it just feels like a bullet in my side and I want so badly to be out to them so that I can get a binder and wear clothes that are comfortable for me and use my real name -🏳️‍🌈 (1/2)

another thing that’s bothering me is I’m out to my parents as a lesbian and I have lesbian pride stuff but what if nonbinary lesbian isn’t valid and I have to reinvent my identity? And I’m not out to my best friend because he’s super sheltered and only just recently started to learn that lgbtq+ isn’t bad and I know he’ll support me but I’m worried about losing his parents’ support because they’re like my second set of parents and I love them and I don’t want to have them disown me -🏳️‍🌈 (2/2So this is an add on to my 2 part (now three part) ask. I think my dad might actually be the only one of my parents that’s transphobic. I’m worried that I’m going to tear their marriage apart by being who I am (3/2) -🏳️‍🌈

--I tried to put in a read more link. Didnt work--

Hello my love, I want to firstly apologize for the late response to these questions. I was wary of trying to answer them on my own without any personal experience with this particular situation, because I know how important this situation is important to you. I had reached out to a friend with personal experience but have not heard back about their contribution. So I will answer with the info I have gathered in my psyc classes/ research I've done the past few days/ and helping friends through similar situations. 

I am obviously, by no means an expert, and anybody is welcome to add their KIND, RESPECTFUL, SUPPORTIVE, and HELPFUL advice or stories as well. 

I’ll start with your best friend: 

When I came out as Asexual (I’m acutally Demi-sexual but I didn’t know that yet) to my best friend at the time, I started by sort of… expressing that I felt my current identity wasn’t fitting quite right for me. It felt like something was off with the way I was trying to live my life and be me, I just didn’t know what it was yet. I explained my feelings to her the best I could without applying labels (I was SOOOO stressed because she has a super high sexdrive and works at an adult toy store and all that so yeah) 

So I explained to her that I just didn’t understand what books/songs/ and movies were referring to when they talked about this “sexual attraction you literally cannot resist) because the concept is literally absurd to me. She asked about all of my favriote celebreities and if I would have sex with them or not, and I told her that the thought for real disgusted me. I explained that I had literally never once at any random human and even thought about kissing them, or having them in my space in any romantic way at all. 

A few days later I cam back to her and told her about some research that I had done, and that I had found something that I thought might fit me better. I brought a little quote somebody had written online about how they felt as an Asexual to help those who were questioning themselves help to figure it out. And I pointed out all the places we felt the same. I told her how much better it made me feel to have this label, this one that finally fit because it stopped the thoughts that there was something wrong with me. 

Your best freinds is new to the community, so maybe start by telling him about a really beautiful story about an individual who discovered their Non-binaryr identity and how wonderfully it touched their lives. How it helped to heal their lives. Explain in a greater detail what it means to be Non-binary. Give him a chance to adjust to the idea of the identity, while you continue to talk about it positively. 

Then when you do come out to him, just remember how much he loves you. It might be helpful to ask him at the start of the conversation to not interrupt you or ask questions until you’re done talking or explaining the situation. Another tactic that I often use for really difficult news, is to write it all in a letter and go sit in another room while they read it. This way, you have the freedom to write and rewrite the letter however many times that you want until it sounds how you want it to. In this discussion, you could ask him not to tell his paretns until you are ready for more people to know. Remind him that you’re telling him this because he is your best friend, and you need his support and love now more than ever. Perhapes ask him to do some research on his own before he really decides anything.  

For your parents: 

Coming out to your parents is…… literally so scary. And there is really never a food time in which to do it. Having to live while keeping this secret from them can be so hard, I understand that so much. But your safety is also the #1 priority right now. 

If it is not safe for you to do so, now might be the time unless you can set up arrangements to stay somewhere else for an extended period of time. You are a beautiful person, and the world needs you here, safe, and full of love still. So please, be careful. 

To start, perhaps ask them to use a nickname instead? Perhaps say that friends at school gave it to you or something, and it makes you really happy to hear it. Or that you’ve recently met somebody with the same name as you that you STRONGLY dislike and don’t want to ‘share’ the name with them. Is there any way to start to slowly transition your clothing? 

For example: If your usual style right now is something like yoga pants maybe swap that for a pair of jeans that aren't super form fitting. Instead of getting a binder right away, invest in some really high quality sports bras. It isn’t the exact same effect, but it might help in the meantime and is much safer than using things like tensor bandages. 

If they question this change in dress, perhapes tell them that this is the new style at your school. Or a new trend started by your favorite celebrity. Tell them you’re bored of your old look and wanted something new for a change. Perhaps if you make the changes ‘slowly’ per say it won’t be as jarring to them. 

If you still decide this is a good and appropriate time for you to come out to your parents, it might be a good idea to have the discussion with your mother first. If you think that only your dad is homophobic/transphobic. That way it will be less likely that you will be interrupted during your heartfelt explanations, and your mom should (theoretically) be more open to the idea. It might help you figure out the best ways to tell your dad, but also you’ll have an ‘ally’ of sorts when it happens too. 

More care should be taken into your information and resources, I think, when you tell them. Such as printing out a sheet of websites to help parents to ‘cope’ with their child telling them of their new non-binrary identity. If you want, you can even find the one you connect with most and print it, give that to them on paper with links listed after it. 

Statistics might be nice, like having how many non-binaryr or genderfluid people live in the same city/ state / country as you so that it does not seem so uncommon for them. 

Here is a sample sentence to get things started for you:

“Even though you may see me as a woman, on the inside, I am not a woman and I am not a man. I’ve been using the word ‘genderqueer’ or ‘non-binary’ to describe my gender, which means that I don’t identify with either. If you placed me on a spectrum, with ‘masculine’ being at one end and ‘feminine’ being at the other, I’m somewhere in-between. Identifying as genderqueer has made me feel so much better because being seen as a woman or a male made me feel so distressed and unhappy. Like I was forced into a box at birth that nobody would let me out of it”

Analogies might also be helpful, as it can help frame this new information to them into a more familiar manner. Like this: “Imagine if someone just assumed that you liked ketchup on your hotdogs without even asking you. For your entire life, they refused to put anything on your hotdogs but ketchup – even though you know, deep down, you like relish.

Finally, you decide to come out and say that you like relish. But every time you ask for relish, people say to you, “If you don’t like ketchup, you must like mustard. There are only two options.There are obviously more than two ways to eat a hotdog, just like there are more than two ways to express and explore gender, but society seems fixated on hotdogs with ketchup or mustard – and nothing else.

Similarly, society seems to think there are only two valid options when it comes to gender – man or woman – when there are actually lots of other ways to embody gender, and even ways of having no gender at all.” 

A good strategy for serious conversation is to use a lot of “I felt” or “I feel” statements. That way, you are still expressing yourself and your feelings while also not making them feel like you are attacking them directly or anything. For example, a good sentence might be to say: “

I feel afraid that if you knew who I really was, that I would lose you,” or “I have been feeling very alone lately, and I’m hopeful that now I won’t be.” 

Lastly, I would suggest being prepared to tell everybody but especially your parents exactly what you need from them in this situation. You may be familiar with all of this terminology and stuff but they arn’t. This is alien territory to them, help them help you by making the things you require them to do or change as clears as possible. Maybe write down a list. 

Stop using my dead name. (Maybe work together on a good nickname with them to use instead? When my friend transitioned from FTM, when he legally changed his name he went with “Emmet” instead of “August” like he wanted, so that his mother could still call him “Em” which had been his nickname since childhood, as he was born with the name ‘Emily.” This might help your parents feel like they still have ‘their’ child still.\

I need to change the way that I am dressing, because it makes me feel very uncomfortable and self consciousness. 

And whatever else you might need form them. 

My beautiful little bean, if you come out to your parents and one of them wants to support you, and one of them doesn't and it ends up breaking them up, I’m certain that they had differences fundamental enough that its probably for the best. And if they didn’t have fundamental differences, they do now. 

One of them took the fundamental concept of parenthood seriously and one didn't: The concept of loving and supporting your child for as long as you’re around on the earth to do so. 

I don’t really think the difference could possibly be more fundamental. 

Sometimes, it takes people a while to get used to the idea. If they react negatively now, they might still change their minds the more they think it over / see how much it means to you. Some people (like my own mom) H A T E change. Hate it. And their first response is always to go on the defensive without thinking. I think you all will have to remind yourselves and eschither to have patients with this.

Remember: Your worth as a human can never change, no matter how much it may feel like it can. You are starting your journey to find the home and the body that you were made to find, its scary, so so so scary. So take your time, enjoy your path. Take deep breaths. Others will ALWAYS love you for the divine creation that you are. The worlds is always ready for you to meet the next ones to love you.

I hope this has helped a little bit at least. I love you. 💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛

[ilikeswishcheese]

There's alot to unpack, its june 19, 2021.

As I sit here, i've stayed up for 18 hours so far just playing video games. I've eaten 1 bowl of rice and some pieces of fried chicken in it. Was very tasty. feeling kinda hungry, but i really dont want to make any food. My mom messaged and called me again, i didn't pick up and im too afraid to talk to her. I know this is more honest than i usually do them, theres something in my life that makes me feel like theres nothing to lose right now. I know my life is amazing, to have two loving parents who give me what I want and work everyday to make me happy. But... I am ungrateful. I want parents who understand me better. I guess i want to understand myself better, and i want people to guide me. I see other families do it all the time, you take after your parents, the apple doesn't fall short from the tree. But i dont think im like my parents at all, the way i live, the way i grew up and the issues im faced with seem so distant from all the struggle they went through.

I guess now that thats out of the way, i can say, im not doing anything. I literally am wasting everyday of my life right now doing nothing, because id rather waste my day then have to think about finding a job and being an adult. I dont want to be responsible and go to work everyday. I can't think of a single job i want right now. A single task, i want to do everyday.

I think the bigger problem is im not motivated enough to improve myself, and its making it harder to even get passed the stage where i acknowledge the issue itself. im truely not happy with who i am. I feel like the things i enjoy doing, serve no function to society. i feel my wants are unmet, i feel like i can't provide anything, to my parents, to my friends, myself and least of all the rest of society.

I have two very grand views of the world. I think this is true of everyone. But I see myself as a protagonist, but, not in the anime, roleplay kind of protagonist, where whatever goal they set they will reach, rather a protagonist in a novel about living everyday the same. That guy, just goes to work and does schoolwork because he has to, and hes gotta help his parents because they risked so much in their lives for me, even though i feel no actual obligation, i love them, but in a way that you love someone who takes care of you. I dont love them like parents. I felt that love, that bond you make with someone who teaches you something valuable. Those bonds are stronger than family, they live in memories in your head to remind you that there are stronger people, that made harder journeys and live to tell the tale happily with what they have. That view of the world is cynical, sad, over-emotional and often times a cry baby about his own personal problems.

But I typically think in bigger terms. I am kinda obsessed with thinking about the future. Where will humans end up? Im often fascinated by the fact that i was born at such an innocuous time, we arnt blowing people up in as many wars as we used too, we are trying to explore space, we just invented social technologies that have been shaping our communities around the globe and the planet is relatively not fucked (yet). what will happen to us in 10 years, thats a question that the protagonist can answer, using knowledge from his life and how he perceives the world he can predict how the world will be in 10 years because itll be roughly the same with a couple world events that might be hard to predict, but what im fascinated in with the future of humanity is not so short term, rather how we will leave this exponential tech-growth stage in the next 100years. What technologies will we invent, in bio-sci (life expectancy, Dna, terraforming, climate change, renewables) to digital-tech (Brain-internet interfaces, artificial intelligence and space travel). Whatever we invent in terms of these technologies will bring us into the real "space" age, where we will explore the stars and cosmos. theres so much to write about this, what specific technologies will do, how will culture shift, will society slide further into decline before we reach a truely civilized age.

I think the answer is No, There arn't enough people who care. What will the protagonist do? with 60-100 more years of my life? ill probably find love, hate work, try and change all of it, and in the end ill probably end up doing the same thing again.

[fuck-customers]

This is kind of long, but idk seems better than spamming you with multiple posts. This ended up a lot longer than I planned but ugh. I'm sorry

I've seen a teenager literally just spit on the floor, and he look embarrassed when I made eye contact but still I had to clean that shit up and if you know you shouldn't be spitting on the floor, THEN DON'T SPIT. Or at the least be like the other nasty people that feel the need to spit all the time that at least do that shit outside, and do it in a place people arn't going to be walking through it!

I've also seen people walking barefoot through the store (We bring pallets out for stocking. That's wood splinters and possible other shit, and sometimes products can spill like cat litter or chemicals, PLUS there's whatever junk people bring in on their shoes and can be feces or whatever else, and people SPIT ON THE FLOOR), or at one point footprints walking around the store starting from some place in the middle of it and just; did they spill something? Did they take off their shoes and their feet were just that bad? Were they taking the electric carts and just decided to walk around later on? Why were their feet so bad? It had to be gone over several times with the scrubber because it wouldn't come off easily. Happened awhile ago for the foot prints but it still bothers me, and it's happened multiple times.

People also like to eat while walking around or they give their kids food. Half the time it's stuff that this kid can barely hold because their age and they drop it or their attention fails and they spill things all over. So many times I have to follow a path around the store for chips or popcorn or chicken bits everywhere. A lot of time for the chicken you can buy, people will drop multiple ones of them, and not pay for any, or get it and walk around and then dump the empty container in a garbage can. It's always the messiest shit that the parents give their kids too.

People will sometimes bring their entire shopping cart in to the bathroom with them, though usually it's after they paid for their stuff, but seriously don't take the carts in the bathroom the doorway is weird and it can get stuck and there's barely room in there and other people will have issues. Nobody is going to take your stuff.

There's a frequent problem with people taking things out of packaging to get a better look at an item. Sometimes things could possibly be put back in, but usually it's stuff that can't be sold anymore because of how the packaging was, broken seals, or because how badly the packaging or sometimes the item was damaged.

Once someone had taken some expensive pillows and switched the bags they were in with cheaper pillows (We know this because somehow someone noticed the barcodes on the tags didn't match the cases or something. I didn't get all the details). It had happened about two days before I ended up finding those same pillows stuffed in the auto center garbage. I have no idea what the point of it was or if they had even stuffed them in there right after they had walked out with them or if it had been the same day I found them because the other maintenance people tended to skip over that particular garbage can fairly often. Even if they decided later they didn't want them, the store is pretty much waaaaay out around the edges of town so driving out there specifically to stuff these 3 pillows in the garbage where they can be found and probably traced back easily that way is just confusing. I was just pissy about having to pull these pillows out of a garbage with car stuff all over it so we could pull it throw claims and figure out if it was tossed for being defective or stolen but dumped, or something else. At one point as I was leaving work a shoplifter was leaving too and the thing went off. The door person tried to stop him and the kid stopped, but the dad got seriously pissy about it and violently yelling at the door person about being stopped. I stayed because I was afraid he was going to get physical,  but he stormed out instead. The kid stayed. He was confused because he didn't see his dad buy or take anything, but a co-worker had seen him put things in his jacket. While waiting for a manager the dad came back in his car and was screaming at his kid to come out, though the kid wouldn't. Eventually the dad took off flying out of the parking lot without his kid. I had left around that point, but heard from one of the co-workers that he had came back to grab his kid and dragged him out. Apparently nobody higher up was going to do anything at the time but would be watching for him in the future, but really worried for the kid and had his license plate number and everything.

And then from my other job People who say their phone numbers in a weird way that makes it harder for me to process what they said.

I get some people who just race through their information and then mad when I ask them several times to repeat it or to slow down.

Others will continually interrupt me or ignore what I'm asking them for to just make their orders, when I literally cannot get in to that menu until I have their phone numbers and their address in the system if it's for a delivery. When I answer the phone, I say "Hi this is ---- Pizza, is this for delivery or pickup?" and instead of answering they'll start with their order, or they'll answer it but then ignore me asking for their phone number/info to go on. I ask a question to confirm something they want and they cut me off part way through what I was asking.

This one dude once just continued to list off what he wanted as I repeated told him I need him to wait because I needed to ask someone else a question about the system or an item, or I wasn't done putting in another part of the order.

Another thing I do is after I tell them how much something costs, is ask if it'll be cash or charge. I'm not sure about the other people but how I was trained and it's a small local business with like 8 people including the owners, so I'm like 90% they still do the same thing. Thing is there is a number of people that will give me their card when I get to their house. I don't have a card reader, it's not my fault you don't have cash. No I can't just give you the food and have you pay later. Either go try to find something or call the store and give them your card so they can put it in the system, and then sign the receipt that we do have (and yes still will accept it even if it's not a credit receipt).

On the card receipt note, I once almost had to pay $30 because I was short in my wallet somehow. It turns out one of the people working on the food had mixed up the credit receipts for some houses that happened to have the same amount for their orders. The Card person didn't have the receipt, and confused as we both were they just signed the regular one. The person who was supposed to pay cash but their husband put in the order, signed the credit receipt that was actually supposed to have gone to the first person. When we were going through my delivery list I was the one that noticed one was a card but the other one actually was supposed to be cash and that's where that missing $30 was from. Of course the customer hadn't called back about it, and the person I was closing for some reason continued to be confused over the issue for nearly another hour after I was supposed to have left even though it shouldn't have been hard to understand what happened and I told them multiple times to call one of the owners about the issue and call the customer about it too but they didn't for the longest time, then FINALLY found out they could just void the order since they apparently didn't want to bother the person with me going back to get the cash, even though they were frequent customers, nice enough people, and the person did call them about the issue but for some reason didn't say any of the things I told them they should about it and me going back for the payment. I'm not so much frustrated with the customers because mistakes happen and not their fault, but mad about the 2 people because I could have lost what's a decent chunk of money considering the job, and then for having to deal with the issue that should have been easy enough to resolve once it was figured out what happened but being ignored for how to deal with it.

There is also a guy at the delivery job that keeps doing minor harassment for the women working there and trying to order them around and act like he's the boss of us (Even to one of the store owners. To me he tried to boss me around and when I snapped back he said "Do you always talk to your bosses like this" ["First off, not my boss, and second yeah I do stand up to people that are acting like you are or I report them"] "Well I am your boss when it's just us". Of course my actual bosses said yeah, no he's not.). None of us put up with it and will yell back or tell him to shut up, and the owners even tell us that it's fine to do so and know about it. I think he's related to them though since most the people working there are family. It's not anything huge either for what he does, but it is enough to be annoying. The rest of us do tend to make fun of/complain about him a lot when he's not around for what he does, or makes comments about how unhelpful he is for the most part. So stuck with him, but luckily enough we don't have to put up with it and can tell him to F- Off (or as long as people arn't at the register), or the owners will yell at him if he does anything while they're around or we tell them about something he did.