#but for characters I need my computer (or just a ballpoint pen)

[raveartts]

Day 5: Too much blood

I hate backgrounds, I hate them, I hate them, I hate them!!!! Too much detail, too little? What colors do I use? How do I line you? Why are you out of perspective, I literally traced you????? How do I shade you???

[softsnzstuff]

Fever Pitch

Fandom: Stranger Things; Doctors Office AU

Word Count: 10k

Summary: Doctor!Eddie gets super sick, but refuses to admit that doctors can get sick too. Eddie spends half the week grumpy and annoyed until he finally breaks in the most whumpy way.

CW: Flashback mentions of domestic abuse // gunshot wounds, minor mess

Monday, April 3rd

“Hey! Earth to Eddie??”

Eddie blinks himself back to reality and realizes he’s been staring at his mug of black coffee for a few minutes.

“Sorry what?”

Steve shakes his head and laughs, “I asked if you’re almost ready to go? It’s 6:58.”

“Yeah!” Eddie grabs his travel mug from the cabinet and empties the contents of his coffee mug into it, dropping the mug in the sink, “Good to go. Sorry, just a little spacey this morning I guess…”

Steve grabs the car keys off the hook and opens the front door, still chuckling, “I can see that.”

---

Usually the drive to work is filled with banter, but today Eddie is tired in a way he almost can’t explain. His ears feel weird too and he can’t quite place it.

Steve parks the car in their usual spot and they both get out. The bell chimes above them as they enter through the back door.

“Good mooooorning!” Comes a voice down the hall. Robin.

“Morning Robin!” They call out in unison.

Eddie heads to his office, slumping into his chair and turning the computer on, while Steve makes his way towards his station where Nancy is waiting and Robin is hanging out.

The dirty blonde is sitting on Steve’s desk, kicking her feet talking to Nancy. Steve approaches his childhood best friend and jokingly waves the air at her. “Shoo! Off my desk.”

She playfully sticks her tongue out at him and hops off. “I just opened the front. First patient isn’t until 7:45 I think?”

Steve nods in acknowledgement as he logs onto his own computer, eyes not breaking from the screen.

“That’ll be good. Give Eddie a minute. He’s being kinda weird and quiet today.”

Nancy and Robin exchange a brief look of worry.

“You talking about me in here?” Eddie wanders in.

“Just shit talking you behind your back, obviously.” Robin teases.

Eddie breaks character and laughs, playfully punching her arm. “Well don’t let me interrupt. Needed a new pen. My favorite one just ran out of ink.”

Steve opens his backpack and pulls out a fresh pen, holding it over his head for Eddie to take. The older man grabs it, slightly disappointed that it’s ballpoint and not gel. Trivial, sure, but a small detail that makes his morning that much more irritating.

He disappears back towards his office as Robin speaks up.

“Well I guess I should get to work too. I’m sure our first patient will be here soon.”

She heads up to the front of the office and sits at her desk previewing the schedule for the day. All things considered, it’s actually pretty light for a Monday. Billy is off today and tomorrow, so it’s just Eddie and Nancy.

The front door bell chimes and Robin looks up to lock eyes with Mr.Gilmore (Mickey, please).

“Hey Mr.G! How are you?” She asks in her bubbly voice.

“Oh just fine, sweetheart. Checking in for 7:45. I think my wife is coming in later.”

The man starts to scribble his name on the check in sheet while Robin skims the schedule.

“Would ya look at that! She is coming in at 2:30.” Robin smiled, “You know the drill then, Mickey. Steve will be out to get you in just a second okay?”

He nods and takes his seat in the waiting room. The doorbell rings again as Robin stands up.

“Good Morning Mrs.Harris. Go ahead and get yourself signed in. There’s no copay today. Give me one second and I’ll tell Steve you’re here too.” She grabs both charts, Mickey’s on top since his appointment is first.

“First two for you, Steve-o.” She says, handing off the charts to her friend.

He runs a hand through his hair as he looks over them. “Yeah alright. Let me bring Mickey back and into a room and then I’ll come back for Gina.”

---

“Well your labs look fantastic, Mickey. Great improvement since the last time. If everything’s working for you I think we’ll keep your meds at the same dosage and follow up in a few months?”

“Sounds great, Doctor Munson.” The man reaches out and gives Eddie a handshake before standing up to head out.

“Go ahead and go up to the front. Robin will check you out shortly.”

Eddie could hear muffled talking in the room next door. Nancy was probably in there with Gina.

“Hey Steve can you bring this to Robin?” He holds out Mickey’s chart with his scribbled notes on it.

Steve gives Eddie a once over, but agrees, taking the chart and heading back to the front. Eddie, on the other hand, went back to his office and uncapped his travel mug of coffee, sipping generously. Why wasn’t the caffeine waking him up like it usually did??

As he swallowed, he finally was able to pinpoint the weird feeling in his ears. It was a sticky sort of pain deep inside that sometimes happened when- his throat was sore.

Shit. A sore throat was truly the last thing he needed. Maybe it would get better as the day went on if he tried to talk less?

---

A few hours passed by, and instead of getting better, Eddie only felt worse. The twinge in his throat was more of a dull ache now, and worst of all, his throat was scratchy in a way that made him want to gag.

As soon as he was done with the last patient before lunch, he beelined for the break room to make himself some more coffee.

The Keurig spurted and hissed as it produced a small latte in his travel mug.

“Babe you’re having more coffee? You’re gonna be up all night.” Steve came up behind him and squeezed his shoulder.

“What are you, my mom??” Eddie snipped.

“Geez, I’m just asking. What’s up with you today??” Steve tried to hide the fact that he was a little hurt.

“Nothing’s up with me, Steve. Just getting coffee because I’m tired.” The older man grumbled and walked back towards his office and shut the door behind him.

“What was that all about?” Nancy asked as she and Robin joined too, pulling their lunches out of the fridge.

“Hell if I know. Apparently the man just wants to be fueled with caffeine.” Steve rolled his eyes and sat down with his salad, “So how was your guys’ weekends?”

---

Its 2:15 now. Lunch has been over for a while. He’s seen a few more patients already and his coffee is now gone. He wants more but Steve is right - he’d be lucky if he gets to sleep tonight as is.

There’s a knock on his open door that gets his attention. It’s Robin and the iPad.

“Hey Doc, can you sign this for me?” She asks, holding out the iPad for him to take.

“Have I ever NOT signed it for you??” He asks in a tone way grumpier than he’d expected.

Shit why did he say that.

“No… sorry, I just didn’t want to assume…”

“You’re fine Birdie, I’m sorry. I’m just… in a mood today apparently.”

He signs for the meds and hands it back to her.

Robin shrugs, “It happens. Mrs.Gilmore is here early by the way. Steves probably coming through with her chart soon.”

Eddie sighs as he stands up. If he could just finish the last four patients he could go home.

---

Steve’s humming to himself in the kitchen as he cooks the pasta. Spaghetti with brown butter and tomato basil sauce is a recent favorite of his and he took it upon himself too cook for the two of them tonight

His phone buzzes. A text from Robin.

What’s cookin, good lookin?

He rolled his eyes. Since he started cooking new dishes, she’d been requesting photos of his food. He sent a pic back of the pasta in the pot of water.

Nothing fancy… yet. Spaghetti with tomato basil and brown butter sauce.

🤤Eddie’s the luckiest guy I swear.

Steve looks over his shoulder. After confirming Eddie was still in the shower, he types back.

Eh… he’s still kinda prickly. I think he’s getting sick or something.

Doctors don’t get sick, remember Steve?? 😤

Steve chuckles to himself. By now, everyone at Hawkins Medical is familiar with Eddie Munson and his ‘Doctors Don’t Get Sick’ one man show. He’s about to say something witty back when the bathroom door opens and small amounts of steam billow out.

One sec - he just got out of the shower…

Eddie pads over to the table, rubbing at his eyes with the heel of his hand.

“Just in time!” Steve offers a smile as he drains the pasta. “Spaghetti just finished. Pot of brown butter on the left. Tomato basil on the right. Pick your poison.”

Steve’s already plating his own dinner, when Eddie coughs into his shoulder, following behind with the smallest scoop of pasta and a tiny bit of sauce.

“That’s all you’re gonna eat?” Steve asks after Eddie takes a small bite.

“M’not hungry.” Eddie lies, but Steve doesn’t miss the way he winces when he took a sip of water.

“Are you okay?”

“Fine.” Eddie insists, “I’m not hungry.”

He goes to clear his throat but it catches, making him cough painfully into his fist. Eddie tries to blink back the pain, each cough scraping the back of his throat.

“Does your throat hurt?”

Eddie pushes away from the table, “I said I’m fucking fine Steve.”

“Hey, watch the attitude. I’m just asking!”

“Whatever.” Eddie grumbles, setting his plate by the sink, “I’m going to bed.”

He storms off to the bedroom, door closing behind him. Steve rolls his eyes and reaches for his phone again, sending a text to Robin.

Definitely sick. He just screamed at me for asking if his throat hurt 🙄

Steve threw his phone down after sending the text and finished his pasta by himself.

*****

Tuesday, April 4th

Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.

The joint alarm for 6:15am pierces through the fog in Eddie’s brain. Apart from the blaring alarm, the first thing he notices is that his throat hurts. BAD. It’s now a scratchy ache that burns when he swallows.

Steve turns the alarm off and groans, rolling out of bed to brush his teeth. Eddie takes the opportunity to lay there a little bit longer, squeezing his eyes shut. His head aches at the front of his forehead and all he wants to do is go back to sleep.

“You want coffee too Eds?” Steve asks on his way from their bathroom to the kitchen.

The older man tries to speak but coughs instead. He clears his throat and groans, “Yes please.”

“Coming right up.” Steve turns around, frowning at the sound of his partner.

While Steve starts their coffees, Eddie drags himself out of bed and heads to the bathroom too. He pees, washes his hands, and then brushes his teeth. He stops for a moment to stare at himself in the mirror. He looks run down for sure, paler than normal and rings forming under his eyes. After rinsing his mouth out, he tames the hair a little and then grabs a few tissues to blow his nose.

He huffs a sigh when it does nothing to relieve the congestion that’s settled in his sinuses.

“For fucks sake…” he grumbles.

He turns off the bathroom light and goes to get dressed. His favorite black jeans and tee shirt will do. They’re just going to be under his doctors coat anyways.

He’s sniffling and scrubbing at his nose as he walks into the kitchen where Steve is sitting at the table, finishing a prepackaged muffin and sipping his coffee.

“Morning babe.” Steve says and kisses Eddie on the cheek, “Shit it’s 6:40 already?? Let me get dressed really quick!”

“Morning.” Eddie hums, dumping his coffee into the travel mug. He takes a small sip, coughing again.

Steve reappears just a few minutes later, hair done and in his scrubs.

“Okay! Ready?”

Eddie nods, “Mm hmm.”

Steve grabs his bag and heads out the door towards the car, Eddie trudging sluggishly behind him.

---

When the boys arrive at the office, they both head back towards the nurses station to greet the girls. Steve drops his backpack at his desk and turns the computer on.

“Hey Robin!” He calls out.

“Morning guys!” Robin bounds around the corner but stops abruptly, “Oof Eddie you don’t look so hot. Are you okay?”

She asks, having forgotten the warning text from Steve late last night.

“You flatter me.” He says, voice dripping with sarcasm. “I’m fine.”

Nancy walks in just as Eddie starts coughing again. She places a gentle hand on his back as she walks past him to her desk.

“Awe poor thing, you sound awful. Are you getting sick?”

Steve and Robin look up at her like deer in headlights, signaling to her immediately that that was the wrong thing to say.

Eddie rolls his eyes, swallowing back his unwarranted anger, “I don’t get sick.”

He turns on his heels and heads to his office, coughing into a closed fist on the way.

“I’m sorry.” Nancy starts, “I forgot…”

Steve waves his hands dismissively, “Don’t be sorry Nance. He’s just grumpy because he doesn’t feel well.”

All three of them exchanged different variations of the same eyebrows-raised glance that screamed ‘not this again’.

“Well I’m going to go let people in now. The Anderson’s were outside at 7:05.” Robin headed up front to unlock the doors.

Her pastel pink scrubs were light and joyful. She usually stuck to the darker colors but today she felt like brightening up the mood a little.

“Good Morning, Anderson’s!!” She greeted as she opened the door, “Enter my humble abode!”

The two of them laughed and stood up from the bench they were waiting on outside. They were in their early 70’s and were some of Robin’s favorites.

“Well you look absolutely vibrant in those scrubs. How are you doing today, Darling?” Mrs.Anderson asked as she signed both of them in on the clipboard.

Robin jogged around the back to meet her at the desk window.

“Thank you! Pretty good! Pretty good! I see you guys are here forrrrr,” she clicked around on the computer, “Back to back wellness checks?”

“That’s correct!” Mrs.Anderson chimes.

“Well good news then! Insurance covers 100% of the wellness exams, so there’s no copay. Let me tell Steve you guys are here.”

She takes both charts and runs them back to Steve, leaning down when she hands them off.

“They’re back to back wellness exams, so hopefully Eddie can just chill with them for the next hour and a half?”

Steve nods. Wellness checks were pretty easy and straight forward to do. Eddie would definitely be grateful he wasn’t having to do any procedures this morning.

The brunette gets up and calls them both back. They walk with him to Exam 2. Robin chuckles as they walk by, Mr.Anderson telling Steve, “Stevie boy, I have to show you this new magic trick I learned from my son in law. You brought my cards right Debbie?”

Mrs.Anderson patted him on the back, “I always bring your cards, Arthur…”

---

“Anderson’s are in 2 whenever you’re ready.” Steve said gently, leaning in Eddie’s doorframe.

The man in question was hunched over his desk blowing his nose again.

“Be there in a seco’d…” he said from behind the tissues.

Steve just nodded.

---

Almost an hour and forty five minutes later, Eddie came out of their exam room, eyes wide with annoyance, the rings under his eyes even more prominent than before. He dropped the charts on Robin’s desk.

“Mrs.Anderson is fine. Mr.Anderson needs a follow up in a month for his blood pressure.” He rasped.

“Sheesh Doc, you sound rougher than earlier.” She opened one of the drawers by her feet and pulled out a fresh bottle of water, offering it to him.

“M’fine just…” he cleared his throat, “Just a lot of talking.” He took the water bottle from her and sipped from it briefly before heading back to his office to type in his appointment notes.

“Everything okay?” Steve stopped him in the hallway. “You look…stressed.”

“Yeah he just. Kept doing magic tricks.” Eddie complained.

Normally he was all for Mr.Anderson’s funny antics, but today he was too drained to entertain anything, especially repetitive card tricks.

“Sorry.” Steve started, “Your next appointment isn’t for half an hour. Take a second to chill in silence or something maybe?”

“I know how to use my free time, Steve.”

Steve threw his hands up in defeat. “Yup! You’re absolutely right. What was I thinking?”

---

By the time lunch had rolled around, Eddie was done. Done with work. Done with talking to people. Done with feeling like shit. He had his head resting in folded arms at his desk, swallowing past the knives in his throat.

Robin clocked the limp figure as she walked past his office on the way to the break room. She turned to face Steve and Nancy and whispered, “Is he okay?”

Eddie cleared his throat, scaring them all. Robin had thought he was asleep.

“He lives!” She joked.

Eddie lifted his head, trying to stare daggers with his glazed eyes, “Would you all quit asking if I’m okay?? I’m fucking fine alright?”

“Yeah Eddie, you totally look and sound fine.” Steve murmured.

“What was that, Harrington??” He raised an eyebrow at the three figures standing in the hallway.

“Nothing! Jesus, I said you’re fine.”

Steve grumbled his way to the break room, Nancy and Robin following suit. The three of them sat down, Steve running a hand through his hair, clearly stressed. Robin popped her Dino nuggets in the microwave and then sat next to Steve, rubbing a hand on his back.

“I’m sorry. He’s being such a dick.” Steve whispered.

“It’s okay Steve. Don’t stress.” Nancy said, shrugging as she ate one of her carrots.

The friends sat in relative silence for a moment until a trio of harsh sneezes sounded from Eddie’s office.

“N’Gshuuh! Eh’TZiew! H- h’EKSHTew!”

Robin opened her mouth out of habit to say ‘bless you Doctor Rockstar’, but Steve clamped a hand over her mouth and shook his head.

“Don’t say it.”

Robin nodded, thankful Steve stopped her in time. They could all agree that today was not the day for that.

Steve sighed and pinched the bridge if his nose, “Fuck. He’s sneezing now. He’s just going to get so much more annoyed and pissy…”

Nancy rested a hand on Steve’s shoulder. “He’s a grown up Steve. Just let it run it’s course. He’ll be fine again in no time.”

---

Steve should have known better than that. He should know by now that when Eddie got sick, it almost always got worse before it got better. And now, just like clockwork, that’s what was happening.

The rest of the work afternoon was filled with tense silence punctuated by sneezing and coughing from Eddie’s office.

By the time they were closing up for the day, Eddie’s nose was tinged pink and he was exhausted. He leaned heavily against the wall by Steve’s desk.

“Are you alm’bost ready to go home? M’by head is killing m’be.” He asked in a weak but frustrated tone.

Steve looked up and his heart immediately dropped. Eddie looked awful. “Yeah, sorry let me just turn the computer off…”

Steve awkwardly scrambled to shut down the desktop computer and shovel a few things into his backpack.

“I’b gonna go wait in thehhh the car- H’iKTschEW! Eht’CHuhew! T’SZIEW!”

He steepled into his hands as he walked towards the back exit. Steve could faintly register an “ughh fuck” before a thick sniffle on his way out.

The younger man scooped up his backpack and jogged out after Eddie, jumping in the car not too long after he had. The car was silent except for watery sniffles from Eddie every now and again.

He figured Eddie was spaced out, too lost in a sick induced brain fog, but music seemed like it would ease the tension. Steve reached for the radio button and turned it up just a little bit. After a fifteen minute drive in the setting sun, he parked the car in their spot and made the short walk to their apartment.

“I’m gonna take a shower…” Eddie mumbled once they got inside, already dragging himself towards the bathroom.

“Guess I’ll make dinner then.” Steve said sassily to himself as the bathroom door shut and the shower water turned on.

When Eddie stepped out of the bathroom after twenty minutes or so, he’d disappeared into their bedroom to change and probably text some friends quickly.

Steve took it upon himself to take a quick shower, afterwards sitting on the sofa and watching reruns of How I Met Your Mother.

Eddie emerged from the bedroom in pajama pants, thick socks, and a T-shirt, cradling a box of tissues.

“I love this episode.” He flopped down on the other end of the couch and pulled one of their blankets over his legs.

It’s only a few minutes into the Blitz episode when Eddie frantically grabs a tissue and clamps it over his mouth, inhaling dramatically.

“ii’KTCH! H’esSHiew! H’MPTsch!!”

“Bless-”

“N’giSHuhew!!”

“Bless you!”

“Tha’gks…” Eddie groans, gurgling into the already damp tissue before tossing it aside and pulling a new one to blow again.

“On seco’d thought… I thi’gk I’b gonna go to bed.”

“Okay. Goodnight.” Steve wants to add that he hopes Eddie feels better, but refrains, keeping it to himself and his reruns.

*****

Wednesday, April 5th

The alarm only beeps once before Steve turns it off, slipping out of bed quietly to start getting ready. Eddie’s congested snores ring out in a way that Steve just knows his throats going to be raw when he wakes up.

After throwing his scrubs on, he makes himself and Eddie some coffee. He’s on his way back to the bedroom, double fisting mugs, when he runs into Eddie, standing in the doorway.

“Steve! It’s 6:30 why didn’t you wake me up???”

Steve’s taken aback by the heat in Eddie’s voice. “I was just making you coffee. I thought you could use the extra sleep. Was about to wake you up just now.”

“You don’t get to decide if I need sleep. I’ll have to take the coffee to-go now. There’s no time.” he turned around and stormed off to the bedroom to get dressed.

Steve huffed a sigh and went to empty the mugs contents into his partner’s travel cup.

Eddie felt absolutely wrecked. He didn’t know it was possible for him to wake up feeling worse than he did last night, and yet. Here he was with full body aches, a sinus headache, and chills. His entire body hurt and his skin was overly sensitive to everything.

He opted for scrub bottoms - the closest thing to sweatpants he could get away with - and a hoodie underneath his doctors coat. He coughed as he got dressed, the tight congestion in his chest slowly loosening.

Steve sat in the living room waiting for Eddie. Being sick had really slowed him down and it was now 6:53. They were behind schedule, usually leaving before 6:50am.

They both hopped in the car, music playing faintly as Steve drove them to work. The older of the two kept stifling chesty coughs with his mouth closed - clearly his lungs were more awake than he was.

As they pulled into the parking lot for Hawkins Medical, Eddie snapped forward into his elbow.

“Eh’GSHiew! snff h’eKTCH! H’eiTSCH!!” The sneezes were harsh and desperate, followed by another productive cough that made Steve wince.

“You sound a lot worse Eddie…” Steve commented hesitantly.

“Drop it, Steve.” He quipped, which would have been a lot more threatening if he wasn’t so god damn congested.

Steve went silent as they both got out of the car. Eddie paused for a minute. With one hand on the hood to steady him, he snapped at the waist sneezing again towards the ground. Steve shook his head and made his way into the clinic, leaving his boyfriend to clean himself up.

“Did Eddie finally stay home?” Robin started, a little too excited.

Steve signaled at her to stop talking as the back door bell chimed followed by some coughing.

Noticing the girls’ concerned looks, Steve quickly hissed, “Just leave it.”

“Hey Eddie.” Nancy said sympathetically as the man walked in looking worse for wear.

“Hi N’dance.”

The back door bell chimed again. Fuck. Billy. The man walked in (late as usual) and dumped his stuff at his desk. He offered a simple “Hey.” before he caught sight of Eddie coughing into another tissue.

“Are you sick Munson? Stay away from me.”

Everyone in the clinic knew Eddie was being pissy the last couple days. Everyone except Billy, who was off Monday and Tuesday. Steve bit his lip, preparing for whatever outburst was about to come from Eddie.

“You shouldn’t have to worry about that since I was going to tell you to fuck off anyways, Hargrove!” Eddie clapped back.

“Eddie!” Steve scolded.

“Hey hey hey! Everyone stop.” Robin stood up in between Eddie and Billy, but Billy just laughed.

“Would you look at that? Munson’s got some fire in him after all. I respect it.”

Nancy, Robin and Steve exchanged looks of confusion before Robin finally stepped back, knowing Billy wasn’t going to escalate the situation.

“But seriously. Don’t fucking get me sick.” Billy pointed at Eddie on the way back towards his desk.

“How about. I go open the doors and we all take a breather? Would that be fine??” Robin asks, exasperated, slowly backing away to open the clinic for business.

Robin pulls her phone out of her back pocket and sends a quick update text to Chrissy. The two had been talking a lot more since they started flirting and so Chrissy was very well aware of the situation.

Jesus Chris, Eddie just almost fought Billy in the nurses station. Told him to fuck off and everything.

Chrissy’s reply was almost immediate:

In any other circumstance that would be the highlight of my week. Poor Eddie, he must really be feeling sick if he’s that confrontational.

The strawberry blonde had known Eddie longer than Robin had known Steve, so she certainly knew all of his quirks. Apparently this was one of them.

Ugh. Yeah. He sounds terrible. Gotta work now. Text you later. Xx

Today was unfortunately one of the busier days. The silver lining was that it was filled with familiar faces. As Robin pocketed her phone, a red haired girl who was about 21 came skating in through the doors.

“No skating in the clinic Max! I’m sorry I don’t make the rules.” Robin said.

“Sorry.” She chuckled signing herself in. Her other arm was wrapped in an ace bandage.

“Steve will come get ya soon, just. Hang tight okay?” Robin teased.

The girl nodded. When Robin came back, Steve was just behind her. He opened the door to the waiting room.

“Hey Max, come on back.”

“Hey Steve!” She clocked her older (step)brother, Billy, in the nurses station as she walked back with Steve, “Hey Dickwad!”

“Grow up Maxine!” He yelled back, flipping her the bird.

She smirked and threw two birds up in response as she followed Steve into exam room 1.

Steve stifled a laugh once the door was closed. “Authentic sibling love…”

“Step sibling. Am I wrong??” Max asked, grinning.

“I mean. He did look up when you said dickwad.” Steve laughed, hooking her up to the blood pressure cuff and slipping the thermometer in her mouth.

Steve typed a few notes in the computer until the cuff deflated. He took the thermometer out from her mouth and looked at the numbers on the BP machine. He typed some more in the computer before heading out.

“Blood pressure is normal considering you live with Billy.” Steve commented, “Eddie will be in to see you soon!”

“No rush!” She called after him. Might as well make herself comfortable. She lay back on the crinkly paper, bending her knees, feet on the table.

She stayed like this for a few minutes before a couple rough sneezes from outside the door startled her.

There was a knock on the door before it opened, Eddie stepping inside.

“Bless you.” She said, slowly sitting up, “Jesus you look like shit.”

Eddie rolled his eyes, washing his hands. “Thank you so much for the compliment. You have such a way with words.”

“Ha ha.” She teased.

“You been icing that sprain?”

“Yup!”

“Wrapping it?”

“Yup!”

Eddie squinted his eyes and glanced at the skateboard in the corner. “You been staying off your board?”

Max paused. Caught. “No… but I haven’t fallen on the wrist! Promise!”

“We’ll see about that. Give it here.”

Max holds her arm out. Eddie sniffles wetly as he unwraps the ace bandage.

“So are you sick or something?” She breaks the silence.

He looks up at her eyebrow raised. “You must be confused. I’m pretty sure you’re the patient in this room.”

Max matched his energy pretty quickly. “Really? Hmm I just thought because you come in here sneezing and looking all sickly…”

“Sickly?!” Eddie scoffed as best he could before turning and coughing into his elbow.

Max watched the display and just shrugged.

“Listen you shouldn’t call me sickly when your skating career lies in the hands of my doctors note.”

Now that the bandage was off she flexed her hand and rotated the wrist a few times.

“Feel okay?” He asked.

“Yeah. Feels good.” She nodded and Eddie opened the drawer behind him and pulled out a box.

He tore it open and held it up. “This. Is your new brace. Wear this for a week and you should be good to go. But no crazy skate tricks!!”

“Whatever you say, Doc.” She hopped off the table and grabbed her board. “Hope you stop being sickly soon.”

“Very funny.” He said sarcastically as she made her way to check out with Robin.

Now that she’d left, Eddie felt his entire demeanor drop. The happy Doctor facade. He put it on for his patients, but he felt like absolute garbage.

he grabbed a few tissues from the box on the exam room counter and blew his nose. He paused as the act sent a tickly buzzing through his nose and his eyes fluttered shut.

“H’eiSHuhew! E’kSHT!”

He grabbed a couple more tissues and blew his nose again before binning them and washing his hands. He was in for a long day.

---

Mrs.Henderson is the last patient before lunch. Usually everyone loves the Hendersons - especially Dustin. However, today Mrs.Henderson came in alone, just her and her hypochondria.

“Hi Robin dear, I really need to see Doctor Munson, it’s urgent. I don’t mean to alarm you but I think I have smallpox.”

Robin stared wide eyed. This was a new one, even for her. “Okay ummm let me just get Steve and we’ll see you in just a second okay?”

Robin took the chart and headed back to Steve. “She thinks she’s got smallpox this time.”

Steve sighed. “Gimme the chart.”

The brunette took a breath and then called her back to Exam 3. “Hey Mrs.Henderson. What brings you in?”

“Didn’t Robin tell you? I think I have smallpox. It showed up a few days ago. Look!”

She points to her ankles, where he locks eyes with the most obvious flea bites he ever did see. Eddie’s gonna love this…

“Alright. Let me get Doctor Munson okay?”

Steve finds Eddie hunched over in his office, face buried in his hoodie sleeves.

“N’xxTCH! ii’xtCHU! H’tchiYUE!”

“Bless you times three!” He announces himself.

Eddie wipes his nose on the sleeve of his jacket and very briefly gives Steve a puppy dog look. “What now?”

“Mrs.Henderson is here. She’s got flea bites on the ankles…”

“And she thinks its….?” Eddie starts.

“Smallpox.”

“Of course she does. Can’t you give her to Billy this time?” He almost whines.

Steve frowned, “She asked for you.

“Ughhh okay fine.” Eddie stands up, clearly at the end of his rope, and takes the chart from Steve, marching into the exam room.

“Oh good Doctor Munson! I need you to look at my legs. I have smallpox-”

“Mrs.Henderson. It’s not smallpox. I can assure you that much.” Eddie says, looking at her legs, “Don’t you have a cat?”

“Dusty brought me another one so now I have two actually. Mittens and Buttercup-”

“They’re flea bites Mrs.Henderson.” Eddie tries to stay calm.

“But I read online that smallpox can cause itchy bumps…”

“So do fleas.” Eddie stated.

“But Google said-”

“Mrs.Henderson. Do you have any other smallpox symptoms? Scabs? Stomachaches?” He cut her off.

She shakes her head and stares at him as he continues, “Do you have a fever?”

“… no.”

“Well I do.” Eddie starts, “and I don’t know how else to prove it to you, but those are flea bites. I’ll give you an antihistamine cream for the itching. And I can recommend a really good vet for your cats.”

He scribbles out a prescription on his pad while she seems to consider. She now seemed less paranoid and more sympathetic.

“Okay. That would be lovely. Thank you.”

“Perfect.” Eddie sighed and gave her his best fake smile before leaving the room. He passed the chart off to Steve and then went to his office to sit down.

---

As soon as the front doors were locked for lunch, Robin hit up Steve’s desk. “Wanna do a coffee run with me?”

“Yeah sure. Now?”

Robin nodded. “Yes sir I need caffeine.”

Steve grabbed his car keys and the pair left. Thankfully there was a great coffee shop just down the road. They acquired three iced lattes for the two of them and Nancy. Billy always brought his own Red Bull, and Steve picked up some hot tea with lemon for Eddie.

They were back at the office in damn near record time - only 15 minutes out of the office. Nancy was eating in the break room. Eddie was in there too now, resting his head in his folded arms on the table again.

“We come with coffee!” Robin announced, handing one of the iced drinks over to Nancy.

“Thank you!!” She pleaded.

Eddie sat up and started that god awful coughing again. He was so pale with a bright flush over his cheeks. His nose was pink and damp and his cough was definitely not getting any better.

Steve came up behind him and rubbed his back, not liking the heat coming through, even past the thick sweatshirt layers.

“Hey, you feel really warm, Eds. Maybe you should see a doctor.” Steve said, concerned.

“For fucks sake Steven! I don’t need a doctor okay?!? I am a doctor!!”

The outburst startled everyone, especially with the amount of heat behind Eddie’s voice.

“Jesus Christ Eddie I’m just trying to help. Here! I brought you tea!” Steve aggressively puts the paper cup in front of Eddie.

The older man looks at the cup and then looks at Steve as he pushes it across the table away from him.

Robin looked at Steve and then immediately looked away. She knew that look. Steve was pissed. He was absolutely seething.

“You wanna sit here and be fucking miserable?? Fine. Be miserable, I don’t care.” Steve stormed out of the room swearing under his breath. “Fuck!”

Nancy and Robin stand there awkwardly before Robin decides to break the ice.

“We’re gonna give you some space Eddie.” The two of them took their lunch and coffee and went to go sit with Steve at his desk.

As soon as everyone left the room, Eddie reached for the paper cup of tea and sipped on it greedily. He did want the tea. It helped with some of the congestion and especially helped with the chills. He wasn’t sure how, but Steve always knew just what he needed.

---

The rest of the day was tense to say the least. After yelling at Steve, he could tell Steve was angry and hurt and wasn’t going to talk about it. So Eddie just kept pouting until they got back to the apartment.

After a shower, he decided he’d just go lie down and give his body a break. He was fucking freezing but his face felt too hot and all the while, he was slipping into fever dreams he didn’t want to be in.

---

He was back in Med school, doing practice rounds at the hospital. He hated the reputation he had here. Not only was he the oldest in his group because he kept failing classes, but because it’s a small town, everyone knew about his history. About his dad.

Imagine first day of school jitters when everyone knows your dad beats you and your mom when you come home. Not exactly a golden ticket to the popular crowd, that’s for sure.

Everyone knew his family couldn’t afford med school either. So they knew he was a bartender on the side to help pay bills.

“Trailer trash Eddie thinks he’s going to be a doctor!” He could hear people teasing.

Stupid how cruel even adults can be when they wanted to.

“Help me Eddie.”

He knows that voice. He hasn’t heard it in years. Why does he know that voice???

He follows it down the corridor, but it only gets more desperate.

“Please Eddie! Please help me! Why won’t you help me??!”

He’s running. Flying down the stairs until he reaches the double doors labeled morgue. He stops in his tracks and pushes the doors open slowly. The screaming dies down and one of the bodies on the table sits up.

It’s his mom. She has bruises on her body and face, a massive gash in her bottom lip.

“Eddie.”

He runs over to her. He’s not too much taller than her when she’s sitting up on the autopsy table.

“Mom…” he hasn’t seen her since he was 8.

He cups her cold cheek with his hand and stares into her eyes, on the verge of tears. Suddenly he feels something warm roll down his hand. He looks and sees blood dripping down the side of her head and onto his arm. It’s coming from the gunshot wound from his father. Her husband.

“Oh my god!” He gasps, falling backwards and crawling across the floor.

He’d only been 8 when his father killed her and Eddie found her. Only 8 when he had to testify in open court and out his father away.

“I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry.” He sobs squeezing his eyes shut and willing her away from him.

It’s silent all around him for a minute and he opens his eyes. She’s not on the table anymore. She’s limp, being held bridal style by …his dad.

“Get up!” He shouts.

Eddie is frozen. He can’t move.

“I said get up!!” His dad commands.

All of a sudden he’s 8 years old again, scared of his dad. He scrambles to his feet while his dad looks him in the eye and drops his moms body to the floor.

“Do you know what you are?” He asks Eddie, jamming his finger into Eddie’s chest, “You’re a fucking liability. You’re nothing. You will always be nothing. You couldn’t save her. How do you expect to save your patients, huh? Certainly not by taking a sick day, that’s for fucking sure.”

Eddie starts crying quietly. “Wayne!! Uncle Wayne help me please!”

He calls into the void but there’s nothing. Just him, his dead mom, and his demons.

---

It’s close to 11pm when Steve turns off the tv and heads to their bedroom to go to sleep. He brushes his teeth quietly, so not to wake Eddie, and then crawls into bed next to his partner.

A small whimper makes Steve look over. Eddie’s asleep, but his brown is furrowed. He looks panicked and keeps making small whimpering noises.

Instinctively, Steve reaches out and runs a hand through Eddie’s hair. The older man almost immediately calms down a little. Steve pauses, resting the back of his fingers on Eddie’s forehead and then his cheek.

The poor guy is absolutely throwing off heat waves. Steve keeps running gentle fingers through Eddie’s hair until the whimpers are replaced by the usual congested snores. After Eddie’s settled again, Steve finally lays down and turns off the bedside lamp.

*****

Thursday, April 6th

Steve groans to himself as he finally turns off the alarm that he’s already snoozed twice. Its 6:35 and he’s barely gotten six hours of sleep. He kept waking up in the middle of the night either to check on Eddie or because he was too hot from sleeping next to Eddie.

He peels himself out of bed, surprised to see Eddie wasn’t there. Some harsh coughing echoing from the kitchen answered that question, though.

Steve pulls on his scrubs and heads to the bathroom, not wasting any time. He added some mousse and spray to his hair, giving it a once over before brushing his teeth and washing his face. He put on his watch and checked the time. 6:48 - time to go.

Grabbing his bag, he heads into the kitchen where Eddie is sitting at the table. He’s in his scrub bottoms and hoodie again, with a thin blanket draped around his shoulders. He’s got dark circles under his eyes and his nose is red and raw from blowing it so much.

“You were up early.” Steve commented, grabbing the car keys and opening the front door.

“Couldn’t sleep.” Eddie coughed, as he exited the apartment.

“Wait. Eddie. You’ve still got the blanket.” Steve points out.

The long haired man waves a hand dismissively. “I’m taking it with me.”

With that, he gets into the passenger seat of the car and leans back, blanket still wrapped around his shoulders, letting his eyes droop. His lips are parted slightly so he can breathe, a small detail that Steve picks up on as soon as he starts the car up.

They pull onto the main road when Eddie starts fidgeting, rifling through the glove compartment.

“What are you-? Oh..” Steve knows this look. Eddie’s pre-sneeze look.

His eyes are fluttering shut and his nostrils are flaring. He’s been sniffling the last couple minutes too so he’s assuming Eddie thinks it’s going to be messy.

“Hold on, hold on!” Steve has one hand on the wheel and one hand trying to grab at the middle console, but he’s also trying to drive the car.

Eddie buckles forward, using both his hands to pull the corner of his blanket up to cover.

“H’issh! NxxTCH! Eh’GSHT! snfsnff ii’KSHT’iew!”

“Bless you! Jesus…”

Steve grimaces at how sick and contagious those sneezes sounded. There’s no way the blanket escaped unscathed. He opens the middle console and pulls a handful of napkins, holding them out to Eddie.

The older man grabs at them and quickly holds them over his nose, pausing for a second, “heh-ISHHuu!”

The raspy sneeze turns into a desperate nose blow. Eddie drops the soaked napkin by his feet and grabs another to gurgle into. After he cleaned himself up, he grabs the last napkin and scrubs at his blanket.

“That can’t be sanitary…” Steve whispers to himself.

Eddie just coughs and leans his head against the cool window of the car until they park in the lot for Hawkins Medical.

The boys walk in where Robin is once again chatting with Nancy before opening.

“Hey guys-” Robin starts.

Steve stares at her wide eyed, mentally telling her not to even address the sorry state of Eddie. The doctor follows in behind Steve, pulling the blanket closer to him.

“N’dancy do you have any m’bore tissues?”

“Yeah Eddie, sure.” She opens the cabinet under the sink behind her and pulls out a fresh box and hands it to him.

“Tha’gks.” He sulks off to his office and Nancy gives Steve a look.

She leans in close and hisses, “You are not letting him see patients like that.”

Steve shrugged and held up his hands in defeat. “I don’t know what you want me to do about Nancy. I’ve been yelled at so many times this week. My hands are tied.”

Nancy and Robin both felt bad. Steve was in a really tough position, wanting to help but also not wanting to start any fights with Eddie. Billy walked in and pointed towards the back office.

“You letting patient zero stay here today??”

For once in his life, Billy was not only right, but valid in his concern. Eddie definitely shouldn’t be here right now.

“He won’t listen to me so I guess yeah. Yeah he is.”

Billy rolled his eyes. The clinic would be opening soon. The first patient was for Billy and then Nancy. Eddie’s first patient wasn't until 9:30.

The first part of the morning went smooth, leaving Eddie to drink his coffee and work on notes in his office. But by the time his first patient showed up, everyone was walking on eggshells.

“Morning Jessica!” Robin grinned.

Jessica was one of the regular patients in her late 30’s who was always friendly with the staff. Her and her girlfriend, Beck, were two of the funniest people around.

“Hey girl! How you doing?” Jessica asked.

“Hanging in there this week.” Robin leaned in close and brought her voice down to a whisper, “Doctor E’s sick and refuses to admit it.”

Jessica mouths the knowing “ahhhhh” as she nods. “I know the type. Doctors make the worst patients though, am I right?”

Robin nodded profusely. “Looks like you had a credit from the last appointment so no copay today. Go ahead and have a seat. I’ll have Steve get you soon.”

She grabs Jessica’s chart and marches it back to Steve. “Our favorite is here for her new med follow up.”

“Perfect! I’ll bring this to sick boy.” Steve types something into his computer and then stands up to let Jessica into an exam room.

---

Eddie looks dead on his feet when Steve brings in Jessica’s chart.

“First one for you Eds.” He says as nonchalantly as he can.

“Yup. I got it.” Eddie stands, but has to steady himself, closing his eyes to let the wave of dizziness pass.

Abandoning his blanket momentarily, he grabs the chart and heads into the exam room.

“Hey Jessica. You’ll have to excuse this-” he gestures to his entire demeanor, “I’m not feeling the best.”

“Understatement of the year, I suppose.” Jessica teased. “Sorry you’re not feeling well!”

Eddie sits down on the chair across the room, already too tired to stand. “So last time you were here we started you on 25mg of Zoloft. That was about three months ago. How are you feeling now?”

“Honestly? Best I’ve felt in a long time.” Jessica smiles.

“Any weird side effects? Mood swings? Any more bad thoughts?”

She thinks for a second but responds matter of factly, “Nope! Feels great.”

“Then I think I’d like to keep you on 25mg for now, but if anything changes you come back and we can reassess okay?”

“Bing, bang, boom! That was quick and easy.” She exclaims, grabbing her cross shoulder bag. “See you in a few months I guess!”

Eddie nodded, “See you then! Robin will get you all checked out.”

When he thought she couldn’t see him anymore, his face fell and he rubbed at his temple. Jessica made her way back to the front window.

“He’s worse than I thought.” She whispered to Robin, “He thought I couldn’t see but he looks really out of it and run down. Needs a pick me up or something.”

Those words echoed in Robins head as she signed Jessica out. He needs a pick me up.

If there was one thing Robin was good at it was humor. Once Jessica was gone, Robin made her way back towards Eddie’s office but saw him in the hallway.

“Hey Eddie! I have a joke for you. How do you tell if a vampire is sick?”

She paused briefly before answering her own joke, “By how much he’s coffin!!”

Eddie stared at her with annoyed eyes before he shouted, “Seriously Robin?? What are you comparing me to a Vampire now?? Stop trying to be funny and go back to work.”

Thank god he stormed off to his office because Robin was too shocked to move or speak. That stung. She’d never been yelled at by Eddie before. Before she knew it, Steve had a hand on her shoulder saying, “I’m so sorry Robs, ignore him.”

Her best friend kept speed walking into Eddie’s office and shut the door behind him so he could yell at his boyfriend in private.

“What the fuck Eddie??? You cannot speak to Robin like that, especially when she’s trying to cheer you up. You owe her an apology.”

Eddie just glares at his desk.

“Did you hear me Eddie?? Fucking apologize. Either get your shit together or go home. Jesus Christ…”

Steve is the one to storm out this time, slamming the door behind him. Nancy and Billy definitely heard, but opted to keep to themselves. Probably for the better anyways.

---

Robin was scribbling numbers on her insurance verification sheet for tomorrow. This was probably her least favorite part of the day, running numbers and making calls to the obscure insurance companies to ask about it.

Her concentration was broken when there was a small burst of wind as someone sat on the chair next to her.

“Hey Birdie.”

It was Eddie. Still wrapped in his blanket. But this time he looked apologetic and sad.

“I should NOT have yelled at you like that. The joke was funny and you just wanted to make me laugh.”

She slowly looked up and met his eyes. They were glazed and teary.

“I’m really really sorry Robin. I didn’t mean to. I just.” His voice wavered, “I just feel so sick!”

Two silent tears rolled down his cheeks. Robin’s heart broke and she immediately pulled him into a sitting hug, holding his head to her shoulder (and shielding him from any patients that might walk in.)

Steve walked up holding papers to copy but stopped dead in his tracks. Robin looked up at Steve, shooting him a look that screamed, “SOS he broke” as she held him.

Steve set the papers down and rushed over, kneeling in front of Robin and Eddie. He rubbed Eddie’s forearm.

“Hey, what’s wrong? Look at me.”

Eddie slowly turns to look at Steve, his face wet with tears and a thin layer of sweat. His nose is running from crying. Robin brushes some strands of hair out of his face with one hand and grabs the tissue box and sets it on her lap with the other.

“I feel bad.” He sobs, “I yelled at everyone and I wish I didn’t and I just feel so sihhh hhh -sick- h’iKSHT!”

Robin bites her lip in disgust as she rubs her friends back. Steve grabs a few tissues and wipes away the strings of mess from Eddie’s nose. He runs a hand through Eddie’s hair and then rests his palm on his forehead.

“You’re burning up Eds. I’m gonna go grab the thermometer.”

“Should we like…put him in an exam room or something Steve? I can sit with him until lunch and you can take him home…”

“Uhhh yeah fuck okay. That’s a good idea.”

Robin helps Eddie up and they walk over to Exam room 1 since the bed is against the wall.

“Just. Lay down for a second Eddie.” Robin is flustered. She doesn’t usually spend much time in the actual exam rooms.

He lays down, resting his head on the small pillow, and she pulls his blanket over his shoulders. He’s still sniffling from crying, his cheeks are flushed bright red.

Steve comes in with his little vitals cart, pulling the thermometer from its spot next to the blood pressure cuff.

“Open up Eds.” Steve slips the device under his tongue and waits for the reading. “102.4° Eddie. No wonder you feel so bad.”

Robin’s already going through the cabinets in the exam room until she finds what she’s looking for. She’s seen Eddie use it on some of the Peds patients before.

She opens the box and takes out a gel fever patch, peeling off the adhesive and gently sticking it to Eddie’s forehead. He whimpers slightly at how good it feels.

“Oh my god Robin those are for children.” Steve can’t help but laugh a little.

“A fever is a fever, Steve.”

She has a point.

“You sure you’re okay watching him?” He asks.

“Yeah I mean as long as you check people in and out. It’s only an hour or so. Just turn the lights off on your way out.”

Steve nods, flicking the light off and closing the door. He’s already sending texts to Chrissy asking if she can cover him tomorrow.

---

Despite it only being an hour, give or take, Steve is super anxious wanting to take Eddie home and get him to bed. As soon as the last patient was out the door, Steve was already locking up for lunch and making his way back to Exam 1.

“Hey buddy.” Steve gently rubs Eddie’s shoulder after turning on the light.

Lunch hour started and Steve had come to relieve Robin of her babysitting duties. Eddie slowly blinked himself awake.

“Hey Stevie…”

“How’re you feeling?” Robin stands up from the chair next to the exam room bed, stretching her legs.

Eddie groans and rubs at his nose, sniffing, “Really really sick actually…”

“You ready to go home?” Steve asks, petting his hair.

“Yeah. I am.” Eddie sits up and touches his forehead, “What is this??”

“It’s a fever patch, dummy. Don’t touch it!” Robin playfully slaps his hand away.

She helps Eddie to his feet and he notices Steve’s already got his backpack and the car keys.

“Are you… staying home with me? Steve you don’t have to…”

“Yes I do. And Chrissy’s gonna cover for me tomorrow too. Especially if you’re finally dropping the ‘doctors don’t get sick’ act and will let me help you.”

“If some soup and the good tissues are involved I’ll gladly accept that offer.”

They make their way out into the hallway and stop outside the break room where Robin just joined Nancy.

“I’m sorry for being a dick this week Nancy.”

“It’s okay Eddie, just get some rest!” Nancy’s mom-friend tone was coming out.

Steve nodded at them and gently shoveled Eddie out the back door into their car. The drive back to their apartment was still about fifteen minutes, but it felt so much faster.

“I’m thinking maybe a shower for you and then bed.” Steve looks over from behind the wheel.

Eddie coughed into his elbow. “I was thinking the same thing.”

When they parked and got out of the car, Steve was expecting Eddie to beeline for the shower like he had the past couple of days, but instead, he gives Steve the biggest hug.

“I’m sorry I’ve been so mean.” Eddie mumbles into Steve’s chest. “I’ll do whatever you say, I’m just tired of feeling like shit.”

Steve softens and leans into the hug. “It’s okay Eddie. I just want you to feel better. Why don’t you go shower and get in bed and I’ll bring you some tea?”

---

Steve had started the tea when he heard Eddie get out of the shower. He didn’t want to start it early and risk it getting cold.

He let the water boil in the electric kettle, letting the tea steep after it had stopped bubbling. He stirred in a bit of honey for good measure and walked it over to the bedroom.

“Eddie, you decent?” He called gently.

When no response came, he toed open the slightly ajar door. Eddie was passed out, face down in his favorite black sweats and a waffle knit shirt. He snored softly, face buried in the bedsheets.

Steve set the tea down on the bedside table and draped a clean quilt over him, taking the dirty one to the wash. He closed the door quietly behind him and made his way to the kitchen to make himself some lunch.

His phone buzzed as a text from Robin came through.

How’s he doing?

He typed out a quick response.

Hey Robs. He’s out cold in bed already…

That was quick 🤣

Record time, I think.

Steve laughed to himself while he reheated leftover pasta. He didn’t know how long he’d have to entertain himself, but Eddie definitely needed some rest.

****

Friday, April 7th

“-chEW!”

Steve slowly pulls himself from sleep, vaguely aware of the wet sneezes sounding next to him.

“K’tschIEW! snrkk sorry I didn’t m’bean to wake you up. Tried to stifle them but… they were too strong.”

“S’okay. Bless you.” Steve props himself up on his elbows and reaches over to feel Eddie’s forehead while he blows his nose. “Feeling any better?”

“Yeah, but still feel like I got hit by a bus.” He tossed the tissues to the side and leans back against the pillows propping him up, “Can’t breathe through m’by n’dose.”

“I’m sorry babe. I’ll look around for the humidifier later and see if that helps.”

Eddie nodded, while Steve grabbed the thermometer off the table by the bed and pressed the ON button. He hands it to Eddie, who slips it under his tongue.

They wait for a minute until it beeps. Eddie leans forward and Steve takes the device to check the reading.

“What’s the damage n’durse Steve?”

“100.3°. Explains why you feel so crummy. A lot lower than yesterday though.” Steve kisses the top of Eddie’s head before getting out of bed to get dressed.

Eddie slumps down, closing his eyes again. He only intended to rest them for a minute, but soon enough he’s right back asleep.

---

Steve’s in the kitchen heating up some soup for Eddie when there’s a knock on the door. He turns the heat down to low and goes to open it.

“Hey Robin what’re you doing here?”

She smiles and holds up a paper bag, “Thought I’d drop by on my lunch break to drop off bagel sandwiches for you.”

“That’s so nice!” Steve stepped aside, “Come on in.”

“How’s Eddie doing?” She asks.

“Well…” Steve points to the living room where there’s a figure hunched over a small humidifier with a towel over their head. “His fever’s down but he’s super congested still. I have him doing humidifier treatment while I make him some soup.

“How very domestic of you.” She smirks, making her way over to the covered figure.

“Hey Eds! Brought you some bagels! Feel any better?”

He flips the towel over his head so it’s resting on his back. His face is looks clammy from the steam.

“Thanks Robin.” He turns away to cough and then teeters his hand back and forth. “Eh. Been better. Still feel like shit.”

Almost on cue, his eyes flutter closed and he turns to the side, leaning into the crook of his elbow.

“M’ptSHew! G’isSHuhew! H’ekTSCH!”

“Bless you!! I gotta get back to the clinic, but feel better, yeah? Lord of rest this weekend.” Robin ruffles his hair and heads back to the front door where Steve is waiting.

Eddie gives a tired thumbs up from behind his tissues before throwing the towel back over his head.

“Guess you finally got him to drop the act?”

Steve sighs, “Yeah. Fucking finally. Doctors do get sick after all.”

The two of them chuckle to themselves, certain Eddie couldn’t hear their teasing over the hiss of the humidifier.

“Thanks for the bagels.” Steve gives Robin a hug on her way out. “See you Monday?”

She walks backwards out the door, shooting finger guns at him. “You know it Steve-o!”

Steve smiled at the ground as he closed the front door, turning the stove back up to a boil. He was so thankful for friends like Robin. And thankful his boyfriend was finally letting him take care of him.

[dzpenumbra]

4/14/23

I keep wanting to get back on a decent sleep schedule, and the night keeps getting away from me. I need to like... get a visible clock by my computer or something.

I'm rendering the desire path project animation. I did a lot of work on it today. I started storyboarding the video itself, arranging the footage and putting in placeholders where I need other footage. I should be cool just going on a hike and filming with my phone or my old GoPro or something and using that for the bulk of the video. I got the Minecraft footage all settled in and recorded a screengrab of exploring in Google Streetview to find actual desire paths at a local college. So... the only stuff I have left to do is... the hiking footage... and a super rudimentary animation of the precursor ideas I had leading up to this idea. Just simple choreographed animations of really basic rudimentary AI creatures wandering around, then them "pathfinding" on a topographical map. Then an animation showing the same concept, but with the AI creature replaced by the ballpoint in a ballpoint pen... and the path behind it as ink. It shouldn't be too hard.

The rest of the labor has been... fucking with opacity automation on 100 fucking individual layers of paths. I needed to time out the build animations at more of a stagger, so it had longer builds for the first 10, then incrementally shorter ones as it got bigger. That meant... math. Yay. -_- Then... I needed to set it so the opacity flicker effect faded in at the end of the build animation, but since the flicker effect was completely independent for each layer, I had to do that for each individual one manually. Then... I need to set it so that the master opacity faded out, so each one looks like a streak that fades to about 75% opacity... and... again... I needed to do that for each layer... so I had to do that 100 times too. And now, it's goddamn done.

Hopefully.

I set up some camera animation, a material opacity fade for ambience and then... well... I'm rendering it now. The first render... the material got fucked up from all the overlapping, no idea what went wrong there. It looks fine in the render view... Fingers crossed on this pass.

So yeah. Big day full of work. Like... non-stop work all day. And now it's 3AM.

Oh, I caught a stream again, the guy who played the Native American character that was... in poor taste. He spent a good chunk of the night complaining about getting reported. But the weird part? The reports he was complaining about? They weren't even for that character!!! It was because he escaped from being captured by mercenaries while handcuffed, by jumping on a horse. Which is a no-no, I guess... And apparently he was reported by someone who was watching his stream? Not even someone involved in the incident? Which is really fucking weird.

I don't know, that whole last stream really left a bad taste in my mouth. And today? Violence for the sake of violence. Beating the shit out of some chick, torturing her, dragging her through town behind a horse. Because... she knew someone they were at war with... and the people they were at war with were all in jail so... this chick paid for it. It can be tough watching villains sometimes. You know, being someone who actually feels their emotions...

It's funny, the streamer actually mentioned that. He said his wife had trouble with those kinds of scenes or those kinds of actions... "you know, she gets all... 'emotional'... <chuckle>" And... it turned my stomach a bit, honestly. Like... okay. I get that females have their struggles growing up around other females. Girls can be psychologically vicious and super manipulative, I get it. It's not something I grew up with, so I can't really compare... but I rarely hear people talking about how much this kind of social pressure can fuck people up, as males. The constant peer pressure to annihilate your own emotions. As a sign of "toughness", of "strength". "I'm so strong, I don't feel anything."

Hey, I guess it makes good soldiers...

I'm someone who grew up... as my mom would say... "crying projectile tears" as a kid... Yet, in a male dominated family where the default setting is "do not talk about your feelings period"... my inevitable fate was to become numb. One way or another. It was just a matter of time. Whether it was dissociation or meds, it found its way there. But... my emotions always found a way through those walls. They are way too big of a part of me for me to even be able to suppress. In fact, when I did suppress them, I would get all these mysterious ailments, like GI problems and shit. For ages. Had doctors stumped. So... big emotions are really core to my identity. And as an artist/musician/poet/etc... ... duh? I guess? XD

Once I started to actually get to know my emotions and engage with them fully, my life started to come together and I started to get to know myself. And it was glorious. But... I also got to know Fear and Dread, and all those... So... Yeah. You don't get to pick and choose when it comes to feeling life fully, you take the bad with the good.

So... it's kinda weird to me that having emotions, and being emotionally in-touch is viewed as... a feminine trait? Like joy and love and passion are things reserved for women? Makes no fucking sense to me. Never did. The whole idea of genders playing specific roles in society just feels really outdated, from times when we had to like... worry about preserving population and shit. Like... "don't send the women into battle, we don't want to go extinct". Just a little outdated in 2023...

But I'll tell ya, a great way to get an emotionally unbalanced and morally questionable population is to raise them to believe that anesthetizing their feelings is an accomplishment, a goal. Ffs my dad subscribes to this shit, and I remember so clearly saying to him several times... "true strength is being able to feel your feelings, and still be able to act through them." Not fucking suppressing them and avoiding them and numbing yourself to the world. That's a great way to become a soldier. Or a butcher. Or an executioner. Or a surgeon or something. But good lord, it does not make a good friend. Or parent. Or romantic partner. But hell, maybe some people want to date a Great White Shark, who am I to judge...

It just upset me that he scoffed at emotions so... condescendingly... when doing extremely violent shit to an innocent person... for... literally no reason but that they were bored and the people they wanted to find were already in prison. The fact that this doesn't bother him... that this is really just a normal, everyday thing to do... completely ruins the effect. Like... it's supposed to be a dramatic gesture. It's supposed to be a message. But if you treat it like a grocery run, it's just... "welp, time to drag another person through the streets, as we do..." And it just takes all the meaning out of it. Which cheats the story, it cheats the interaction, it cheats the victim, it cheats his character, and, in the end, most of all, it cheats the viewer.

It's dumb and it's lame storywriting, in my opinion. A sociopathic villain is boring as fuck to watch from their perspective. They're just... walking around and doing shit. There's no tension, there's no conflict. It's just Anton Chigurh walking around emotionlessly shooting people for no reason until he gets gunned down, then roll credits. It's boring. What's the point? What, for money? He wants money. Cool... wow... so enthralling...

Emotion adds tension. Apathy makes shit boring. Tell me you'd want to watch this. A wild west setting. Protagonist is an outlaw. He robs a bank. He's robbed banks every week for the past 2 years, he's literally going through the motions with his friends. They grab a hostage, barely talk to them. They go through the same script with the cops as always, same demands, same plan. No fear, no tension, just... "ugh, are we gonna get caught this time, this plan better work." Like... annoyance instead of tension. Hostage gets released, they run. They get cornered. They have a shootout, they go down. The only emotion expressed is the player upset that their friend didn't cover them (out of character). They get patched up in custody, they go to jail. They don't care. They just bicker and quarrel amongst each other about who is to blame.

I miss good storytelling. This whole tough-guy "I don't care" crap is so fucking boring and overdone. XD

So yeah, that was an awkward moment, because he was mocking his wife for having difficulty in those moments of... morally questionable action... and... I had trouble just watching that part... where he forced his wife (playing a teenage boy) to make the call of whether he beats the shit out of a defenseless woman for just living in the same town as the person who killed his father. And then making the teenage boy repeatedly stab this woman. And he starts chuckling and rolling his eyes, like "women, amirite?!"

Yikes.

Welp, I guess you gotta expect it out of someone who basically only plays villains...

Alright, I'm off to bed. Hopefully I'll get out and get some fresh air tomorrow, I'd like to go skate a bit. It's been really nice out, but my sleep has just been so fucked up, I haven't had the energy to go out.

[writing-refs-junkpile]

Writer tips: custom shorthand for the win

Normally, I share grammar tips and writing resources on this blog - it is, after all, my Writing Refs Junkpile - but today, I’m stepping outside my literary box. Today, I’m sharing some of my custom shorthand and some advice for creating your own.

Put simply, I developed these symbols (and many others) to make writing notes and scheduling writing sessions faster, easier on my arthritic hands, and a little less obvious to anyone who might find my notes and snoop.

Behold, my scribbles:

Yep, it’s messy. I scanned these from sketch paper. The mess doesn’t matter. If you’ve given that a good look over, you’ll notice that these symbols have a few things in common.

All but two base symbols are written with two strokes or fewer; that’s two times you have to lift your pen from your paper as opposed to however many it takes to form the letters.

Each of these symbols is visually similar to certain mainstream letters, characters, symbols, or objects; this makes it easier to mentally associate symbol with meaning, which makes it easier to scribble them out as easily as writing.

These symbols can be written with several different writing instruments, whether you use a brush-tip, felt-tip, ballpoint, or rollerball pen, or a pencil. (Felt-tip pens, however, seem to win the race when it comes to ease and speed vs legibility.)

Without further ado, I’ll explain each of the various symbols you just saw.

Analyze Stats. Sometimes when I’ve got writer’s block, it can help to do a word, page, and character count and dates of a chapter. If I’m struggling with an unfinished chapter, checking what I have so far can be encouraging. If I’m still staring at a blank page with nothing more than a title, checking the previous chapter can be a nice kick in the pants. As for dates, those are mostly a way of mentally shaming myself into writing.

And etc. This single-stroke symbol is less complicated than it looks – a cursive + trailing into an e. It’s a quick, convenient way of saying “and whatever [said topic or plan] entails/includes” without writing it all out, and an easy way to leave wiggle-room in my plot notes.

Build notes. Single-stroke, based on musical notes and arrows. This tells me I haven’t yet translated the plot events into notes for the next (or current) chapter, and I need to do so before I can sit down and write them out.

Edit From (____ paragraphs/pages) back. This one looks like a doozy, but the first symbol is the only one that really matters. It’s a two-stroke - one, if you bring the bottom up to cross - and it’s based around an attached cursive ef; following are a symbol for and, (optional. I tend to skip it.) a number, and symbols for paragraphs or pages. Put simply, this says go back (chosen number of paragraphs/pages) and edit to end of written portion. Editing forward can be a great way of getting into the zone when you’ve stopped in the middle of a chapter or scene.

Etc, Etc, Etc. Four-stroke, built around three connected cursive e’s with periods underneath to remind me it’s short for etc. Basically, this symbol is a way of sassing myself from my notes, a reminder to not sweat the small details until I’m in front of the computer, and sometimes, it’s a way of connecting two pieces of a scene or dialogue together without writing out all the little nitpicky stuff between.

Find grammar. Two-stroke, built with the top of a ? and a g for the bottom half. Put simply, this means find proper grammar, spelling, punctuation, or terminology for the noted sentence or phrase. Had a brainfart while writing notes? Scribble this guy with what you think is correct, then you have a reminder to look it up and (if necessary) correct it later.

Flourish / Polish. Two single-stroke symbols, one loosely based on a stylized cursive f, and the other a cursive p which trails into a tail like a piece of scrollwork; both are needlessly fancy to further hint at their meaning. The first – flourish – means the noted section is as bland as oatmeal and reads like a vacuum cleaner manual; jazz it up with details, action, and color. The second – polish – means the noted chapter is complete; read through to see if it needs anything before editing. And speaking of editing…

Check spelling, grammar, punctuation, and edit. This single-stroke stands for a lot of words, but the appearance is simple: a checkmark that trails into an s.

Go from notes. Single-stroke, based around a g which trails into an arrow; since scanning this page, I realized that I wrote these up slightly wrong, so I have provided a badly-drawn correction to the left. (MS Paint. Gotta love it.) This symbol tells me I’ve already written up an outline for the next scene or chapter, I need to start writing from that outline, and I need to stop whining about it. As for when I don’t have notes…

Maybe start with ____________. Four-stroke, and one of the simplest: an ellipsis followed by a simple arrow pointing to the right. This is for when I don’t have an outline to work from, when I don’t have a solid (or even halfway solid) plan for the next writing session, and planning research sessions. What follows this symbol is an idea of what to try starting with...for instance, the first symbol. Analyzing my previous chapter stats is a good way to bully myself into getting the rough draft started.

Paragraphs/Pages. I’ll admit, I don’t use the first one very often. The first -paragraphs - is two-stroke, built like a combination of the mainstream symbol ¶ and a capital P; pages is a single-stroke combination of capital P and lowercase s. Lastly…

Research. Single-stroke, and a combination of an arrow (like a cursor) with a wrapping tail like an @. This means I need to do some manner of research for the next bit of writing, and is often followed by the topic I need to research.

To sum all that up:

Booyah. So much said, and so little written!

This custom shorthand has helped with my note-taking already, and I’m still designing new symbols to cut even more words down to quick wrist-wiggles. Now, you have everything you need to create your own, for whatever purposes you may have. Just remember the basics -  be stingy with your strokes, choose lines, curves, and angles you find easy and comfortable to write, and use visual similarity to remind yourself of each symbol’s meaning when you see it.

Good luck, and remember to share the love with your writer and student friends!

[hooliganstreetjournal]

Storytelling Sideways

I’m living in a tall, narrow room with little, three-eyed flies.  Crunch the spiders with the bottom of a glass slipper.  I’ve got a tendency to exaggerate, and I limp because of a fractured heart. It doesn’t mean I don’t want to dance.  This is life.  I try to have a good time.  Join me in the mania.

Alright, no more poetry.  I’m a proper writer with poise and structure.  A storyteller in sweatpants.  Working on an orange desk.  Drinking tap water and listening to hip-hop.  

That’s the thing about stories.  Everyone tries to make sense of them.  When is the last time your life made sense?  It’s a comic book.  You’re the main character and sometimes goofy kids tear out pages to make paper airplanes.

On the bight side, there are some constants.  Water.  You’ve got to drink it.  Wash your teeth daily.  Tell people you love them, but not just in word form.  TELL THEM IN CAPITAL LETTERS. Tell them twice in a row.  Give them love shaped like nothing at all.  Burp it in their face and if they give it back that feels good too.  I’m not sure about all the rules.

Sometimes the water is poison.  Sometimes love eats you whole.  We’re going to die anyway, so don’t go feeling sorry for yourself.  Fortunately, we don’t all go quietly in the night.  Some of us rip right through the sound barrier and scream at the gods.  Others die in outer space.  Others die stuffy hoarder huts.  Cats eat their lips.  And that’s a part of the story.  A little dramatic if you ask me.

So forgive me if i’m not “even keel.”  I don’t mean to be.  I don’t apologize for not blindly marching toward retirement.  I guess I’m a fighter after all.  Black-eyed, busted lipped, bruised and begging for more.  Why not?  Scars are better than postcards.  I guess that’s a personal preference.  

Don’t expect me to follow the rules.  I’m not telling you everything. I cut out the boring parts.  The parts where I’m banging my head against the same bloodstained wall. Not my blood.  I’ve killed the same spider twice while writing this.  That’s not a joke.  It’s not even part of the story, but it just happened.

See, I can’t explain it all. I’m not that kind of writer. You’ll have to take my word for it.

Poetic diversions, sipped out of a green bottle in a paper bag.  I haven’t lost control.  I simply don’t require control at all times.  The story doesn’t go beginning-middle-end. It’s not always going to be a chronological highlight reel.  This isn’t instagram.  The only filter here is your reading and comprehension level.  I’m not a writer, I’m a walking Rorschach test. I read slow and think fast.  It isn’t always pretty.  Sometimes the ugly way is the better option.

There’s a tendency to develop habits.  A little cyclone, synchronized with the hours of the day.  Daylight savings doesn’t provide enough disturbance.  Sometimes it takes a broken nose and a bail-bondsman and a beaver to change the direction of the stream.  It’s hard to tell what’s intentional and what’s chance.  And I’m not sure if recognizing the momentum is enough.  I know it’s good to stomp from time to time.  Make a little turbulence.

The story is about balance and scraped knees.  The story isn’t accepting awards.  If it accepts the awards, it has to accept the cunty remarks.  I don’t think the story needs to carry all of that weight.

I don’t want to make a perfect story, but I’m also not scuffing it up on purpose.  It’s the way my fingers and brain work together.  It’s the way this tall room and these three-eyed flies make my head work.  There’s no tradition to it.  They used a quill and ink.  Then they used ballpoint pens.  Then they made stories on a clunky typer, and then a computer.  This one is written with a stack of matches and a can of hairspray.

[theclaravoyant]

The Sum of Our Parts [FitzSimmons]

AN ~ for @florchis, who prompted “Daisy trying to help FitzSimmons mend their relationship after the Framework,” and also tagging @buckysbears who recently wrote about how we need more fics about characters recovering by learning to stand on their own two feet, which is a concept I’ve also threaded strongly through this.

FitzSimmons, Bus Kids. Rated T for general angst & Framework references (no A*da refs though).

Read on AO3 (~2600wd)

The Sum of Our Parts

It was a miserable time on the SS Space Prison. Not the routine itself – that was not too bad, not too different from being on base, but for the grating knowledge that they were here against their wills. No, what was really getting down on everyone was the shadow of the Framework, still hanging over their lives.

Coulson replayed Captain America’s speech to the Hub at the Fall of Shield; a call to action that the meek, obedient teacher in the Framework world had never heard, had never felt. He’d sent children to be brainwashed and killed. They were computer-coded children, and he a computer-coded version of himself, but still. It was a harrowing thought.

Mack was haunted by memories of his daughter, in a grief that was different from his first grief in all the most painful ways. Having her back had always been a dream and though that should have helped him move on, instead it led him to question the nature of reality. It plunged his faith into doubt, and he felt more alone than he had in years. If Hope could exist in a godless world like that, and not here, what was the point of it all?

Elena did not have the answers, and she knew it was more than just language and culture that kept her from understanding Mack now. But she stood by him, and did her best. Even so, she puzzled over her final decision in the Framework. To stay with Mack. To die with him. She had passed it off as a gamble she had been willing to take, but really, in hindsight, she had not been confident. She had been ready to die. It was true: everyone who loved her most had been in that room. Her family was dead and gone. Her closest friend had disowned her. She had nothing but Shield, and even they were distrustful – except Daisy, perhaps, but still Elena wondered. Would she ever find a place?

Daisy herself, ever resilient, was the backbone of the team in this time of crisis. Having lost Trip, lost Lincoln again – having been hunted and beaten by her friends, by May and Fitz – she felt all her old wounds ripped open again. The only way to heal them, she found, was to try and patch up the people around her. She had never loved God like Mack did. She had never been a drone, or feared being one, like Coulson had. She couldn’t even understand how May had managed to come out of this so lost: though her decision not to save the girl had been reinforced, by seeing the horrors of the aftermath of the alternative, May could feel how lost and broken her team was, and could do nothing.

But Daisy could.

And that’s why, one night, Jemma came knocking on her door. Frantically, heavily, incessantly, until Daisy hauled the flat of the door out of the way of her desperately rapping knuckles.

“It’s Fitz,” Jemma gushed, in explanation. Daisy nodded in understanding, and pulled Jemma into her room. Jemma shoved a packet of Oreos into her arms, as some sort of payment for the disruption, and begged: “Can you go talk to him, see how he is?”

“I talk to him plenty,” Daisy assured her. “He’s going through some stuff, for sure, but he’ll be alright.”

Jemma shook her head. That wasn’t good enough.

“I just. I want. To help. So badly. But I can’t be near him right now. I can’t. Not after -”

“I know.” Daisy swallowed the knot in her throat. “Fitz knows too, okay?”

“And he’s beating himself up about it, isn’t he?”

“In fairness, he’s beating himself up about a lot these days,” Daisy pointed out, and hoped she didn’t sound as cryptic as she thought she did. Last week, Fitz had been hit by a depression so deep and so bleak that believing he deserved to breathe had barely been in the picture, but Daisy wasn’t about to tell Jemma that. The last thing Fitz needed was Jemma in overdrive, and the last thing Jemma needed was to fear that the man she loved, but couldn’t look at, was about to off himself in her absence.

“I want to fix him,” Jemma insisted. “It. The situation. I just wish I knew what to do to make it better.”

“You know that’s not your job, right?” Daisy checked. “To fix him?”

Jemma sighed.

“I know,” she promised. Tears pricked at her eyes, and tugged at her voice. “But I love him, and he’s hurting, and it’s hard.”

“I know,” Daisy agreed. She wrapped her arms around Jemma, and together, the two of them took a big, deep breath. A little reluctantly, Daisy pulled away.

“You want to know what I think?” she offered. “I think you need to stop trying to solve the problem for him.”

Jemma blinked, surprised and a little hurt. Those words sounded brutal, coming from Daisy, who was such a friend to them both. But Daisy continued:

“Firstly, you don’t see the world like he does, and maybe he doesn’t need what you think he needs.

“Secondly, you have your own stuff to deal with. I know you want to help Fitz and I know you know he’s not the same person as the one in there, but I think you should take a beat. Your heart doesn’t always know what your brain knows. You had to kill a man who loved you, and who looked like Fitz. A robot man, but still. He tried to kill you – and then, inside the Framework? Another man with Fitz’s face looked you in the eyes, and shot you. Actually shot you!”

“Stop it,” Jemma hissed, clenching her fists. Hot tears dripped down her face. Daisy pulled back a little.

“I’m just saying,” she explained more carefully. “Solving other people’s problems isn’t going to get you out of this one. And acting like everything is the same as it was two weeks ago is going to destroy you both. It’s nobody’s fault, but it still sucks ass, and it’s still going to take time to get over. I think you should take this time as an opportunity to process what’s been going on with you. Don’t worry about your relationship. It’s still there. It wants to be there. It’s not going anywhere. But it’s not going to move forward, either, unless you trust that Fitz can get back onto his own two feet without you. He has done before.”

It was a hard reality to face, but Jemma could not deny the truth of Daisy’s words. All she wanted to do was curl up in safety, but there was nowhere safe, and she was in no condition to offer the help she wanted to, and sometimes… sometimes she wasn’t what Fitz needed. Just as he – as much as it hurt them both – was not what Jemma needed right now.

She took a deep breath. Tears fell freely down her cheeks now, and Daisy was tearing up too, bleeding empathy.

“I just want everything to be okay,” Jemma begged.

“Me too.” Daisy hugged her again, briefly, and then held her at arms length to meet her eyes. “And yes, I will keep an eye on Fitz, and help him if I can. I promise. In fact, I’ll go see him right now. Sounds good?”

Jemma nodded absently, distracted in thought and wiping at her eyes with her hands until Daisy passed her a tissue.

“I’ll go… book a treadmill,” she decided. Daisy looked at her, puzzled, and she explained: “Regular exercise has meditative qualities, and can help with emotional regulation as well as sleep and circulation. Amongst other things, of course.”

She smiled briefly, and Daisy smiled, more encouragingly, back.

“That’s my girl,” she praised.

--

When Daisy knocked on Fitz’s door, he called her in. He was in bed, with a sketchpad on his lap, removing a set of earphones from his ears as she pushed the door open. Immediately, her eyes were drawn to the pictures all around the walls. There were strings and pegs up, decorated by pages he’d torn out of other books, and drawn all over in pen and pencil and apparently, charcoal. Some of the images were quite horrific, and almost made Daisy flinch: faces in agony, dead trees, hellish landscapes. Others were not so bad. A woman on a hill, silhouetted in moonlight. A candle, burning brightly in the darkness. A butterfly, drawn in black charcoal and decorated with bright blue and red ballpoint pens.

“You’ve been busy,” Daisy remarked. Fitz looked around, unsure how proud he should be of these scribblings, born from nightmares.

“It relaxes me,” he explained.

“That’s good.”

Daisy nodded, and perused the pictures some more, but she no longer paid so much attention to the details. Her mind churned over Jemma’s concern, and how to raise the subject with Fitz. In the end, she decided, she couldn’t be much more brutal than he was being with himself, so she forged ahead.

“Jemma’s worried about you.”

Fitz lowered his eyes. “I know.”

“She’s sorry she can’t see you.”

“That’s not her fault. It’s…”

“Complicated,” Daisy finished for him. “But she wanted to make sure you knew. She still loves you, you know. Like, really a lot."

“I still love her too.”

Fitz’s eyes burned with tears. His heart had been yearning for Jemma for so long, it had become a dull and pounding ache now that they were apart… but not really apart. Not separate. Just separated. It was always a struggle to remind himself of that, especially on the bad days.

“Do you want to send her a message?” Daisy offered. “Write her a letter. I’ll deliver it, if you like.”

Fitz shook his head.

“I’m not… ready,” he explained. His voice trembled a little. It was hard, not to reach out to Jemma with everything he had. But in spite of how beaten down he felt, and how he could hardly believe she would still hold this olive branch out to him, something inside told him not to do it. Something on the page in front of him, told him not to do it.

“Not ready… how?” Daisy wondered.

“Not ready to… be Jemma’s. Without being myself first. I thought I knew who I was but now I don’t anymore. I don’t know if I’m a good person. I don’t know who I’d really be without Jemma. Until I know that, I won’t be able to prove to myself that the Framework wasn’t a real potential outcome. That it really wasn’t me. And until I can prove that, I won’t be ready.”

Daisy pressed her lips together, and swallowed hard. Her stomach turned.

“Does this mean you’re gonna go run off and find yourself in the wild?”

Fitz laughed, a short and breathless dismissal.

“No! I don’t want to leave you guys… I sure as hell don’t want to break up with Jemma. I just want to be sure that, by the time we can be together again, I can be my best self. Does that… make sense?”

“Not really,” Daisy confessed. “But if it did, I think I’d be concerned.” Fitz snorted.

“Can I at least tell her you’re alright?” Daisy pressed.

“Sure.” He wasn’t, really. Not every day. But he was going to be.

Sensing the gravity in his words, Daisy nodded. They lived messy lives, but here they were, making the best sense out of it that they could. She dropped down on the bed, scooching in beside him, and sighed.

“So, what’s the plan?” she asked him. “How are you going to figure out that you’re a good person?”

“Well, I don’t know,” Fitz replied. “A lot of thinking, I s’pose. And overthinking. It’s going to take a while which… well, sucks.”

Daisy nodded in sympathy. “Welcome to the human race, I guess. And the Inhuman race. Existential crises are another thing we share, apparently.”

“Oh, good, so you’re not too evolved to look at my bugs?”

Daisy screwed up her nose. “Are they real bugs?”

“No. Pictures of bugs.”

“Are they like… eating people, or something?”

“No!” Fitz gagged. “They’re just really geometric to draw. I thought I’d try my hand at something a bit less…”

He gestured around the room. Scribbles born from nightmares. Even the nice ones, Daisy saw, were rushed and urgent and painfully soul-bearing. Still, they held promise; the promise that Fitz could still produce something beautiful, and if he couldn’t do that by building, maybe this was a better way.

“Okay,” Daisy agreed. “Shoot.”

--

Daisy couldn’t help but be proud of them, as much as it hurt, as she watched them struggle toward the light on their own. In fits and starts, they made their way toward progress. Jemma started exercising, sleeping and eating better, and meditating with May each morning. She was less inclined to panic attacks and catastrophic spirals, and gradually she was getting her PTSD back under control. Fitz, meanwhile, started talking to Mack at length about philosophy, and as he stumbled through hundreds of years of humanity's existential crisis he began to find he no longer felt so lost. His art evolved, too, and he developed two separate notebooks: one for the nightmares, and one for his more deliberate art. He drew flowers, and beautiful beetles. Scarabs were his favourite. Sometimes, he drew people, or even scenes, like the one of an old couple walking a dog. One night, Daisy found him by the big viewing window, trying to draw a picture of space, like the one he’d had in his bunk since the Bus days, and even before that. Apparently, he’d bought it from a goodwill store back home, and carried it around with him all this time. It wasn’t here, prisoner with him, but it was reassuring to know that he was finding roots of what he loved before Jemma, outside of her.

Plus, Daisy couldn’t lie, it made her intensely happy that this love – their love of space – was so much older than their love for each other and yet, it was something they shared.

(The cosmos says what? Daisy almost teased.)

Then one morning, she was eating alone at a table in the cafeteria, watching Jemma and Fitz across the room, each one table apart. Now that they were both on steady ground, Daisy wondered if she shouldn’t reprise her matchmaker role; no doubt both were hesitant to make the first move with so much at stake. But then, before her very eyes, Fitz got up and walked to Jemma’s table. He held out a sheet of paper.

It was a page from his notebook. A bird, based on a bluejay, and beautifully detailed as if in flight.

“I… made this for you,” he offered. Jemma’s eyes flicked over his face, still not sure if she was ready to meet his eyes, but she took the paper and studied his drawing and sighed in admiration.

“It’s beautiful,” she praised.

“Thank you,” he said. It wasn’t as hard to swallow the compliment as he remembered. “I’ve been working on my art lately. Helps me think.”

“That’s really nice,” Jemma agreed. “I’ve started meditating with May. Though I’ve missed having you at morning tea.”

“Me too.”

And then Jemma took a deep breath. She looked up, and met Fitz’s eyes. They were a little heavier, more burdened than she remembered, but just as rich and soulful and loving as the eyes that she remembered. That she herself loved.

“Fitz, I – I mean, would you – “ She pressed her lips together for a moment. “Would you like to sit down?”

“Jemma,” he breathed. “I would love to.”

And he did.

[moonlightreal]

Alfea library- Magix Creativity Connection

The last of the books from the Alfea Library.  This was illustrated with quite a lot of how-to illustrations, which I wasn’t able to save in the text in any sensible way, so I just saved the text.

Magix Creativity Connection

Hello everyone and welcome to the Magix Creativity Connection. My name is Masha Stalwart and I'm a professional crafts person. I hope you enjoy these fun and easy to do crafts. I've also requested submissions from Alfea School for Fairies for some of the girls favorite crafts. Enjoy!

Create a Friendship Frame A friendship frame is a picture frame that you have taken time to decorate and add a personal touch to. The best part about the frame is that when you are finished, you can put your favorite picture of you and your friends inside. Besides adding a fashionable splash of color or character to your room, friendship frames can make great gift ideas! If you decide to give yours away as a gift, decorate the frame in a way that you know your friend or family member will certainly adore. Getting Started – Finding the Right Supplies The great thing about this craft is that there are endless options in decorating your frame. The supplies you will need no matter how you choose to beautify your frame are: 1.unpainted picture frame 2.glue (preferably not a glue stick) * Note: the heavier the decorations you apply, the stronger your glue will need to be. Items you can use for decorating are: 1.sea shells 2.stickers 3.buttons 4.uncooked pasta 5.old jewelry 6.glass marbles (make sure they are more flat than round) 7.sparkles, sequins, or glitter spray 8.magazine clippings 9.different colored acrylic paints 10.anything else you think would look great! Begin by deciding how you would like to decorate your frame. Would you like to paint it first, to have a touch of color showing through your decorations – or leave it plain? What objects, if any, would you like to decorate your frame with? I chose to decorate my Friendship Frame using a variety of colored flat marbles from my local craft store. I also picked up some spray-on silver glitter to give the frame a frosted, winter-like appearance. To make a picture frame like the one shown follow the simple directions below: Spread newspaper out to protect the table or floor from paint, glue and glitter. Set your frame on the newspaper, and protect or cover the middle section of the frame (where your picture goes).

Spray the edges of the frame with silver glitter. Allow to dry.

Empty out your bag of marbles and arrange them on the frame in a way you like (I prefer to have them as random as possible). Glue each of the marbles in place starting at a corner of the frame and working your way around – that way, you won’t miss gluing any marbles! Allow the glue to dry – depending on what type of glue you use, this could be 10 minutes or 2 hours. Test a marble to make sure the glue is dry. If it is, set your picture frame upright and have a look! If you like the way it looks, your decorating is complete. If you want to add some extra sparkle, apply a light dusting of glitter spray over the entire frame (just be sure to cover the glass part where your picture will go). Finish your Friendship Frame by inserting your favorite picture of you and a friend. Enjoy your masterpiece!

Submission from Flora

This is one of my favourite things to do with beautiful fall leaves. Find a few different sized leaves that have fallen from their trees. If it has been raining put the leaves somewhere inside overnight to let them dry out. Place the dried leaf under a piece of plain white paper. I grabbed a piece from Tecna’s printer. Using a crayon or pencil crayon, gently zig zag back and forth over the leaf. Adjust your pressure on the paper a bit to see what works best.

Once you have your leaf shape, you can add other colours or glitter glue to add some spice to your design. When you’re finished, carefully cut out the leaf shape. Try using shaped craft scissors for some, as it’s an easy way to add detail.

Every year, I would make a bunch of leaves and tape them in the kitchen window at home. This year, I’ve taped them up in our bedroom window and Bloom just loves them!!!

Submission from Stella

This is a super fabulous project that even makes writing your list of Things to Do fun! The first one I had was all the rage in Professor Palladium’s class, and since then, everyone has wanted to know how to make a Funky Flower pen! It takes a little bit of patience in the beginning, and it totally pays off. Here’s how! What You’ll Need A ballpoint pen that you can remove the top from A super pretty artificial flower Ribbon Floral tape Here’s How Remove the head of the flower from the stem. Discard the stem—you won’t need it. Remove the top of the pen. Place the base of the flower at the top of the pen and carefully secure it using the floral tape.

This is by far the trickiest part, so take your time to make sure the flower is attached to the top of the pen. I use several smaller pieces of tape to do this. If you’re still having trouble, get out the glue!

Once the flower is affixed, wrap the floral tape around the pen to cover it and make it look like the flower’s stem.

Once the stem is covered, wrap a pretty ribbon around the top of the pen and make a fabulous little bow, and Voila! A super funky flower pen! It will make taking notes for even the more boring class excellent! They also make a great gift. Make a few of them in all kinds of pretty colours and present them in a small clay pot! Your friends will adore you, and your study area will look fabulous!

Submission from Musa

Musa’s Rockin’ Bath Salts Making homemade bath salts is super easy and really rewarding. They make a great gift and be sure to keep some for yourself for a nice hot bath after a long exam! What You Will Need: One Cup of Sea Salts One Cup of Epsom Salts Food colouring Essential fragrance oil of your choice Mixing bowl Spoon Arm Muscles!!! How to Make Them: Mixing together these bath salts is a great little bit of exercise. To blend the color through (and be sure you don’t end up coloring yourself!!!), the colour needs to be really well blended. In a mixing bowl, mix up the sea salts and Epsom salts. Depending on the colour and fragrance you want, add those to the salts. Start out with less and add more if needed. I used five drops of lavender oil, one big drop of red, and one big drop of blue. You can always add more if you need it, but you can’t take it away. Now, use the back of a spoon to blend the salts while pressing them against the side of the bowl. The coloring needs to not only be blended, but absorbed into the salts as well. If the color is not absorbed, you will color your bath when you go to use the salts! And color yourself too! After pressing the salts for about five minutes, remove half a cup of salts. Add more color to these salts and blend through. Add these salts back to the rest. This will give some of the salts a darker colour, add depth to the mixture, and make them look really professional. You can package the bath salts any way you want, and I use resealable plastic bags and use my computer to make funky labels. Have fun and get creative!

Submission from Bloom

Candle Making Making candles this way is fairly simple, you don’t have to worry about burning yourself with hot wax, and the possibilities are endless! **Parental help may be required** You will need: Sheets of honeycomb bees’ wax Wick Pizza cutter Hair dryer Imagination!

Take a trip to your local craft store. The sheets of honeycomb wax come in many different colours. Which wick you buy will depend on the size of the candle you want to make. Number 2 wicks make candles up to 2 inches across. Look on the back of the package for more information. Basic Technique Using this technique, there are many different ways to make candles in all different shapes and sizes. There is more information about that below. For the basic technique, place the sheet of wax on a clean work surface. Use the pizza wheel to cut the wax to the desired shape. Be careful to keep your fingers out of the way! For this example, I cut the wax in half lengthways. With your hair dryer on low, begin to heat the wax up. This will make it softer and easier to roll. Place your wick on one edge and fold the wax over as seen below. This will fasten the wick in place so you can roll the candle.

Continue rolling the candle until you are done. If it is hard to roll or seems to crack at all, use your hair dryer to soften it again.

Sometimes, the length of wax is not long enough to make a candle as thick as I want. If this is the case, simple add another strip of wax and join them closely as you see below:

Once almost all rolled up, I cut the edge of the wax using my fancy craft scissors to give a shaped and decorative edge. Voila! A candle!

Candles for traditional candlestick holders are a great project for the holiday season and they make great lighting around the dining room table for dinner! Here is how to make beautiful spiral candles. Cut the wax sheet on the diagonal:

If you want super high candles, place your wick on the long side. If you want shorter and thicker candles, place the wick on the short side. Heat the wax with your hair dryer as before. Fold over the edge to secure the wick and roll! Placing one sheet on top of the other with one half-inch overlap made the double colored candle.

Another way to spice up your candles is to add a different colored inset. To do this, you should ask an adult to help you cut out your design. I decided to add a purple heart to a cream candle. Place one on top of the other and trace your design. An adult can then cut out the shape for you using a knife.

Place the inset in your wax and roll. Once the candle is rolled, use the warmth of your finger to gentle blend the seams.

Another idea is to add colored stripes to the candle, for this, place the stripes under your wax sheet and then roll!

Use your imagination and see what you come up with! If you’re not happy, carefully unroll the wax and try again!

These are some of my ideas. Give me a shout on the message board about your ideas on how to roll candles!!! And remember to always be careful around lit candles and never leave them unattended.

Back to the author

To make beaded snowflakes, you will need wire, wire cutters and pliers, and some pretty beads. How to Make Them: To begin, cut (or ask an adult to cut for you) 3 three inch long pieces of sturdy wire. This will create your foundation and base for the snowflakes. Shape the wire as seen below and using a more flexible wire, wrap the three sections together. Do this by wrapping in and around the arms until they are secure. Then, slide the beads down each arm in a pattern you find pretty. String each arm one at a time or you will have a terrible time keeping the beads on! Once one arm is decorated, use your pliers (or ask an adult for help with this part) to fold over the end of the wire securing the beads. If the wire is too long snip off the excess. String the other five arms this way as seen in photo number two below.

Using a lighter gauge of wire (one that is more flexible), string beads between the arms as seen in the third photo above. To secure the wire, wrap it three times around one arm, bead, wrap once around the next, bead and so on. Once you’re done, wrap three times again to secure it.

Ribbony ornament

What You’ll Need: Foam balls. I used a four-inch globe, but you can use any size you want! Lots of pretty ribbon Dressmakers’ pins How to Make One: First start by taking a ribbon and wrapping it around the globe. Cut the ribbon at the right length (the distance around the globe). Use this ribbon to cut a bunch more pieces to the same length. Starting with a thick ribbon to cover the foam, pin one end of the ribbon into the foam, wrap it around and fix the other end in place. All your pins will be placed in the same area of the ball (see the picture of the bottom of my Winx Globe below). Once the globe is entirely covered with the thick ribbon and you cannot see any of the foam any more, use more ribbons to create a pretty design. I varied the color, thickness, and sheerness of my ribbons. Once you are done wrapping the ribbons, make a hanger by looping a piece of ribbon and placing it in the top of the globe. Finish the globe by cutting a bunch of pieces of ribbon and putting a pin through the center and pinning it at the bottom of the globe. This will help to hide all the pins at the bottom and make a super pretty tassel draping from the bottom of the Winx Globe!

The finished Winx globe will look beautiful hung on a tree, in a window, or anywhere around the house.!!!

Submission from Bloom: pipe-cleaner candycanes

What you Need: Sparkly pipe cleaners How to Make Them: Take two pipe cleaners in complementary colours. I chose pretty pink and shiny silver. Fold the pipe cleaners in half.

Holding one end of the pipe cleaners firmly, slowly begin twisting at the other end. The spiral shape will start to show up. Keep twisting until it is as spirally as you want.

Fold over one end to form a candy cane!

These are fantastic, easy decorations that can easily be sassed up using beads or more pipe cleaners! Try wrapping three together!

(paper snowflakes cut for being too reliant on pictures)

Submission from Layla: felt magnets

What You Will Need: Felt Squares Pompoms Ribbon for the Snowman’s scarf A Cotton ball Wiggly eyes Peel and stick Magnetic strips How to Make Them: Making these cool holiday magnets is pretty simple if you follow the step-by-step instructions. First download the template for the shapes here. If you are not sure how to download the file, ask an adult to help you. Cut out the template shapes and place over the felt. Carefully trace around the shape. For the shape of the snowman and Santa’s face, cut out two pieces for each magnet. These will then be glued together to create a stiff back so they won’t slouch on the fridge!

Once your shapes are traced onto the felt, use your craft scissors to cut the shape out. I cut on the inside of my outline to be sure none of my felt tracing is on my shape.

Glue to two body pieces together. You will need something stronger than a glue stick, so try your white craft glue. If the edges are uneven, carefully trim them so they match.

Now, glue on the Snowman’s hat and Santa’s hat and beard. They’re starting to come together!

With all the felt secured, now start to decorate the shapes. For Santa, I used a white pompom for the tip of his hat and unrolled a cotton ball to make the fuzzy brim of his hat. His nose is a small red pompom. For the Snowman, I glued on a pretty plaid ribbon is his scarf, two green pompoms are buttons on his belly, a small triangle of orange felt is his carrot nose, and I decorated his hat to have holly on it. This was done by cutting two small squares of green felt for the leaves and placing 3 red pompoms as holly berries.

Place a strip of magnet on the back of each so they’ll stick to the fridge.

Finally, pop on a set of wiggly eyes and they’re done!

These are a super fun craft to do on your next Winx Weekend and make great gifts for family and friends!

Back to the author

I wanted to create a brand new section for a fun and fabulous holiday I just heard about. Valentines Day! It's all about love and friendship, which are two of my favorite things. So enjoy these crafts and give them to your Valentine.

Submission from Layla

Valentine’s Day Craft This is a great way to make a handmade Valentine for that special someone. This craft can be made with wood pieces, foam cut outs, or even pieces of paper! I made mine with wood shapes I bought at the Magix craft store, and I talked with Bloom and she says shapes like this are available pre-cut at most larger craft stores on Earth! If you cannot find the pre-cut wood shapes, sooo do not worry because you can use foam pieces or even construction paper to make a totally cool result. The only difference is you will have to cut your own shapes, and that means you get a little more creative control! Awesome! What You Will Need: You will need:

· 7 --1.5-inch hearts · 7 --3-inch hearts · 1 -- 6.75 inch circle (to act as a base to glue pieces to) You can totally vary the sizes and numbers of these. If you are working with pre-cut shapes, just place them out and get enough so it looks pretty. If you are making the shapes yourself, cut them out to the sizes you think will look good! You will also need: · Red paint · White paint · Glue · Decorations First step is to paint the wood pieces. If you are using paper or foam, you can skip this part and cut out your circle for a base and two different sizes of hearts. Paint the large circle and smallest hearts white and the larger hearts red. Depending on the wood pieces, you might need to use 1-3 coats of paint. Remember to let them dry in between. You know you need another coat if the color of the wood is still showing through. It depends on the wood they cut into the shapes. For example, my big hearts only need one coat, but the little ones needed 2-3 coats. Once they are painted, be sure they have dried entirely. Then, place the large circle in the center of your workspace and place the seven larger hearts around the edge of it pointy end in. Space them so they look good to you. Next, begin gluing the large red hearts in place. I used my white craft glue and it worked great! Once those are in place, leave it to dry for at least 25 minutes. Next, place the smaller hearts on to see how it will look and then begin gluing them in place. I pre-painted mine with an iridescent medium from my watercolor paint set to give them a bit of a glow. You could paint yours with a silver paint to give a similar look! Once the smaller hearts are glued in place, leave everything to dry. Once it is dry, it is time to decorate!

This is entirely up to you, your style, what you want to say to your Valentine, and frankly, what you might have around your house! So! Get creative!

I used four kinds of glittery glue on mine, and you can use whatever you want! Get creative with it! Now, all I have to do is decided who I want to give it to . . .

Submission by Flora: Valentine’s Bookmark **Parental Help will be Required** Here is a simple but pretty bookmark you can make. It will keep your place in your favorite adventure and makes a great gift, too! First, get some supplies. Here is a suggested list of supplies for you: Heavy cardstock – 1-2 sheets of your preferred Valentines colors Fancy paper – 1-2 sheets of complementary paper with great colors or patterns. Stickers – if you want to add some extra flash. Ribbon Exacto knife Scissors White glue

Cut out hearts of two different sizes so you can layer them on top of each other. I would suggest that the larger heart be about three to four inches high. That way it will be large enough to keep your place in your book really well.

Then glue the smaller heart on top of the larger sized heart.

Now is when you get your parents to help you out. Using the cutting knife, get your mom or dad to cut along the border between the two hearts, like this. You want them to cut right through the bottom layer of paper. Make sure you put a cutting board or a cardboard box under your project, so nothing underneath is damaged.

Then feel free to add decorations, stickers, and ribbons to personalize and add some extra sparkle to your bookmark.

When you are finished, your funky bookmark will be a work of art for you to enjoy!

Submission by Bloom: How to Make a Keepsake Box A keepsake box is something that you can store mementos, trinkets, jewelry, or other personal items in. A fantastic keepsake box can easily be made by decorating a wooden or cardboard box with items that you can find at home or at your local craft store. By decorating the box yourself, you add some of your own style and flair, thereby making it extra special. In honor of Valentines Day, I chose to make a heart-shaped keepsake box that is pretty enough to be given as a Valentines gift, and practical enough to use. If you choose to give your keepsake box away, it can either be a gift on its own, or you can fill it with goodies for those you love and care about. This craft is adorable; your friends and family will be sure to adore it! Getting Started – Finding the Right Supplies The great thing about this craft is that there are endless decorating options for your keepsake box. The supplies you will need no matter how you choose to beautify your craft are: 1. a cardboard box or unpainted wooden box that has a lid you can open and close 2. glue (preferably not a glue stick) * Note: the heavier the decorations you apply, the stronger your glue will need to be Items you can use for decorating are: 1. stickers 2. lace and pieces of fabric 3. paper doilies 4. small fake flowers 5. old jewelry 6. sparkles, sequins, or glitter spray 7. magazine clippings 8. pictures 9. different colored acrylic paints 10. anything else you think would look great! Begin by deciding how you would like to decorate the keepsake box. Would you like to paint it first, to have a touch of color showing through your decorations, or leave it plain? What objects, if any, would you like to decorate the box with? I chose to decorate my heart-shaped keepsake box by painting it with bright red acrylic paint and adding sequins. Because I also found the natural wood of the box to be beautiful, I decided to leave the inside of the box unpainted. To make a heart-shaped keepsake box like the one shown, follow the simple directions below: Step One: Spread newspaper out to protect the table or floor from paint, glue and glitter. Set your box on the newspaper.

Step Two: Using a medium-sized paintbrush, paint the top and sides of the box with red acrylic paint. Do not dilute the paint with water. Open the box and paint the inside edges. Allow to dry. Paint the bottom of the box and let it dry.

Step Three: When the box is completely dry, measure the length of sequined fabric you will need to decorate the top edge of the heart. Plan to have the ends of your fabric join where the two halves of the heart meet on top. Use scissors to cut the appropriate amount of fabric.

Step Four: Working in sections, apply strong glue to the top outer edge of the heart. Secure your fabric to the glue by pressing it in place. Allow the glue to dry (depending on what type of glue you use, this could be 10 minutes or 2 hours). Have a look! If you like the way your keepsake box looks, your decorating is complete. If you feel the box is too plain, keep decorating until you love it! Just be sure to keep the tastes of your friend or family member in mind if it is a gift.

When you have finished your craft, try filling it with delicious chocolates to make the perfect Valentines gift!

Submission by Musa: Magical Golden Nuggets

Bloom and I were talking about St. Patrick’s Day, and she said there is a tradition similar to one we have in the Harmonic Nebula. On Earth, rocks are collected and painted gold to represent the gold at the end of the Lephrechauns’ rainbow. At my home, we make the same thing, but that’s only half the fun! What You’ll Need: · A collection of rocks · Gold spray paint · An adult’s help What to Do: Ask an adult to help you spray paint the rocks gold. Always spray paint outside and make sure what you are spray painting is on an old piece of cardboard or newspaper so you don’t spray paint something by accident! Once the rocks are magically transformed into golden nuggets, that’s when the true fun begins! The Best Part: Back home, once the golden nuggets were made, I would create a fun story to go with them! One year, I hid them and made a treasure hunt for my friends to follow. Another year, we imagined they were magical golden nuggets that intensified our Winx (that was back before I came to Alfea and wasn’t as connected to it as I am now). That’s the best part! So create some golden nuggets and get together with friends and create a super story to go with them! Have fun!!!

Festive Crown What You Will Need: · Foam sheets · Ribbon · Glue · A hole punch · Various decorations This is a fun and easy way to make a crown for any occasion. First, measure the distance around your head. This will let you know how long to make your crown. Once that is measured, mark this distance on your foam sheet. I used the light green for my crown base. Then, outline the shape of the crown. This picture shows how I shaped mine:

You could do your differently! Make a few sketches on scrap paper to see what you might like. Here’s a good tip: Once you have cut out one half of the crown, fold it over and sketch the other side using the cut portion as a template. That way, you’ll be certain the two sides match! Next, hole punch the ends to fit ribbon through to fasten your crown to your head. If you want, you can use a few different colors of ribbon and make the tails long so they stream down your back and look pretty in a bit of a breeze. Finally, decorate your crown! Here is how I decorated mine:

I used a piece of black velvet ribbon at the bottom of it. I glued it on at the bottom to create a solid grounding for my crown. Next, I glued on the three shamrocks to recognize St. Patrick’s Day. I’m still not sure if I’m entirely done yet. I think I might add an accent with some glittery glue and make the ribbons longer. Here’s what it looks like now!

Make yours however you want and have fun with it!

Caterpillar Card This is a super cute and totally easy way to make an original and funky card for anyone on any occasion. First, grab some supplies, and the next thing you know, you’ll want to make a dozen of them! What You Will Need: Sheets of Foam Pompoms Ribbon Glue Card stock or plain paper

First, take one color of foam sheet. This is going to be your background or the basis for your card. I chose yellow, but you can use any color you want (or that you have around the house!) Then, cut out the front and back of your card. I made mine 4 inches wide and 6 inches tall. You need two pieces this size; one is for the front and the other is for the back. I had a little trouble making the sides of mine straight, so I cut them with a bit of a zigzag pattern. I think it looks really funky, too! Next, cut out the shape of a leaf. This can be any leaf shape you like. If you’re having trouble, take a peek outside and see what leaf you see first and make yours that shape! Just make sure it is small enough to fit on the card and big enough to fit your caterpillar on it. The leaf shape can be super simple, because it’s really just a backdrop. Select a few pompoms to create the body of the caterpillar. I chose six in pink and purple, and you can choose any number and colors you want! If you’re handy with a needle and thread, string the pompoms together with a thread. This will help to keep them together and makes the body of the caterpillar look better. If you’ve never sewn before, ask a parent, guardian, or older sibling to show you how so next time you might know! Next, punch two holes in the two card pieces. This is how you will fasten them together with ribbon. This is something like what you should have now:

Now, it’s just a matter of putting it all together. String ribbon through your holes and tie to fasten. Glue your leaf to the front page and glue your caterpillar to that. Finally, decorate. I added a couple floral touches and some super huge eyes simply because they make me smile!!! If you have a marker that will write on the foam sheets, use that to personalize your card. I don’t, so I glued in a piece of card stock inside that I wrote my greeting on.

These cards are super simple to make and make a huge impact on any friend!

Dragonfly Pin I made these dragon fly pins once at a birthday party, and I’ve been making them for friends ever since. Sometimes I make them with a pin backing on them and sometimes with a hair clip accessory.

What You Will Need: Foam sheets Glue Ribbon A pin or hairclip backing To begin, I cut out a basic shape to glue my dragonfly onto. This will give it some structure and impact. Next, cut out the dragonfly shape. Try making a few practice shapes on scrap paper before you design the real thing. I placed some ribbon ends on my basic shape and glued the dragonfly over that. I think the ribbons add a lovely fluttery feel to the pin and look fantastic as a hair clip. They stream through the hair and just look beautiful! Once the ribbon and dragonfly are fastened, decorate to what you think looks nice. Finally, glue the pin into the back. Use a good strong white glue and plenty of it!

Voila! A super snazzy pin sure to dazzle anyone!

[starlightpen]

100 Drawing Challenge 2017, days 31-40

031/100 For the next ten days I’m experiment with different drawing mediums. Colored pencil is good, but I wanted to see what else could be done.

032/100 Today’s medium is graphite! I’m not sure if it works for this style but I’m glad I tried it at any rate. Also I bet someone has done this pose while working at least once…

033/100 This paper isn’t so great for watercolor. I have a huge at block today but at least I got to put down a character concept.

035/100 Today’s medium is gel pens. They aren’t the best at this scale but it can’t happen a lot better than I thought it would. I even added some metallic elements this time!

036/100 I’ve had a day and needed to vent. Medium is ballpoint pens.

037/100 My computer just did NOT want to work with me on this! It’s done, though, at least. This is Pointe, an oc I decided to draw for the challenge. This isn’t her original style but drawing her in different styles will hopefully help me sort out the details of her design.

038/100 Elephant girl! This is actually close to the fashion I want to wear some day. The media is ballpoint pen for the lines and Crayola crayons for the color.

039/100 Today’s medium is highlighters! I’m glad to discover that highlighters photograph better than they scan. When you scan them they get strangely dull. I also haven’t drawn a magical girl in a while. It’s nice to not care about modern fashion sensibilities and draw something frilly.

040/100 For the final drawing of the mixed media set, I went with collage! I actually really like this kind of fashion and wish I could wear it regularly. Collage elements used are adhesive-backed fabric, textured scrapbook paper, washi, and gauze papers.

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Corporate Identity - Behind the scene of creating Brands

Ever wondered how big corporations like CoCa Cola, Apple or Mercedes-Benz got their Logo or Brand so well? I kid you not, they must have went through countless of designers and agencies just to get their brands developed and paying billions just to get their logo popping into your mind when you thought of a refreshment and a new computer.

As your value and trusted designer, I would like to share with you the secret process behind those big brands, and how it will help you as a business owner to understand your brand better. 

Designing Identity

In any redesign projects, the designer must cautiously revise the equity of the present identity and recognise what it has meant to an organisation’s culture. Paul Rand was the mastermind behind the redesigns for UPS, Westinghouse and Cummins. For each brand, Paul cleverly sustains the elements from the original identity and alter them into bigger ideas and stronger, more sustainable visual forms. His approach was always to present one idea.

Rand designed logos for endurance. “I think permanence is something you find out,”he once said. “It isn’t something you design for. You design for durability, for function, for usefulness, for rightness, for beauty. But permanence is up to God and time.” 

Logotype + signature

A logotype consist of a word or words which may be altered or redrawn from scratch. Logotypes must be unique, robust and sustainable. The legibility at various scales for both web and print is imperative, whether a logotype is printed on ballpoint pen or in an external sign ten stories off the ground.

The most effective logotypes are an effect of careful typographic exploration. Designers consider the attributes and the relationships between the letter-forms. To achieve the best logotypes, letter-forms may be redrawn, altered and handled in order to represent the right character and positioning of the company. The process of studying many typographic variations will allow the designer to achieve a sustainable design. 

Look and feel

Look and feel’ is the language visually makes a system exclusive and instantly recognisable. The support system of imagery, typography, color, and composition are the elements of a cohesive and unique design. The best designs and its overall look that resonates in the mind of the customer and rises above the chaos of a visual environment. All elements of a visual language should be intentionally designed to advance the brand strategy, each doing its part and working together as a whole to unify and distinguish.

Design Design is intelligence made visible. The marriage of design and content is the only marriage that lasts. Colour palettes Identity systems may have two colour palettes: primary and secondary. Corporate lines or products may have their own colours. A colour palette may have a pastel range and a primary range. Imagery Within the category of content, style, focus, and colour, all need to be considered whether the imagery is photography, illustration, or iconography. Typography The systems incorporate typeface families, one or sometimes two. It is not unusual for a special typeface to be designed for a well known brand. Sensory There are also the feel of texture and weight, the sounds and smells and the movement of any objects.

Colour

Colour is used to express personality, character and evoke emotion. It encourages brand association and accelerates differentiation. Coca-Cola red is very familiar to the consumers as well as the impressions of the blue Tiffany gift box. In the order of visual perception, the brain sees colour after it registers a shape and before it reads information. A core understanding of colour theory is most vital when choosing a colour for a new identity, a vivid idea of how the brand needs to be perceived and differentiated, and a talent to deliver consistency and meaning over a wide range of media.

Colour brand identity basics

Use colour to facilitate recognition and build brand equity. Colours have different connotations in different cultures. Research.

Colour is affected by various reproduction methods. Test. The designer is the ultimate arbiter for setting colour consistency across platforms.

It’s hard. Ensuring consistency across applications is frequently a challenge. Remember, most of the world uses a PC.Test.

Sixty percent of the decision to buy a product is based on colour. 

You can never know enough about colour. Depend on your basic colour theory knowledge: warm, cool; values, hues; tints, shades; complementary colours, contrasting colours. 

Quality insures that the brand identity asset is protected.

Some colours palettes are used to unify an identity, other palettes may be used methodically to explain brand style, through distinguishing products or business areas. Commonly the primary brand colour is allocated to the symbol, and the secondary colour is allocated to the logotype, business descriptor, or tag-line. Colour palettes are created to assist a wide range of communications needs. Confirming prime reproduction of the brand colour is an essential element of standards, and part of the task of uniting colours through packaging, signage, printing, and electronic media.

Typography

Typography is a central building block of an effective identity system. Companies like Apple, Mercedes-Benz, and Citi are immediately identifiable in large part due to the unique and constant typographical style that is used with intelligence and purpose throughout many applications over time. A unified and coherent company image is not possible without typography that has a distinctive personality and an inherent legibility. Typography must support the positioning strategy and information hierarchy.

Identity system typography needs to be sustainable and not on the current trend. Thousands of type shave been created by well-known typographers, designers, and type foundries over the centuries, and new typefaces are being created each day. Some identity firms routinely design a exclusive font for a client.

Selecting the right type requires a basic knowledge of the breadth of options and a core understanding of how effective typography functions. Issues of functionality differ dramatically on a form, a pharmaceutical package, a magazine ad, and a website. The typeface needs to be flexible and easy to use, and it must offer a wide range of expression. Clarity and legibility are the drivers.

“You should be able to cover up the logo and still identify the company because the look and feel is so distinctive.” Michael Bier (Partner,Pentagram)

“Look is defined by colour, scale, proportion, typography, and motion. Feel is experiential and emotional.” Abbott Miller (Partner,Pentagram)

Thank you for being with me today, next blog, I will share with you my first ever corporate identity design and development. I will walk you through what I did to rebrand an established and well known food brand originated from NewZealand and became so popular that Australia decided we wanted it too. 

[hollywood-vintageita]

Cool gadgets Can Be Fun For Anyone

The sole scenario I can think about needing it is actually all through a zombie apocalypse and you simply’re seeking to split glass to grab an axe. A minimum of, that’s the scenario I've worked out in my head. Still, the LightMate Crisis Flash Gentle would make an excellent gift for campers, travelers or any one that regularly works by using a flash light-weight. Cool Gadgets

When comparing charges on electronic gadgets you could possibly find related products with diverse price factors. The commonest factors for this are that freshly introduced, tech merchandise will often be more expensive than lessen specification or more mature goods.

Area Pens are nothing at all below wonderful parts of space-age engineering technologies epitomized in the producing instrument. Any time you provide a Fisher House Adult males’s Pen to someone you hold dear, you’re basically giving him a piece of background as these iconic ball pens happen to be to Room and back again For the reason that US initially built ventures into outer House.

Genuinely premium quality audio in an aesthetically satisfying shell is difficult to find, but Fluance nailed it Along with the Fi70.

Shoot premium quality footage everywhere you go Along with the new DJI Osmo Pocket. Ultimately you can get improved video clip footage than your mobile…

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"I am not a gadget man, but I just acquired a bit fiber optic digicam on a string for a house inspection. Shit was definitely cool to Engage in with and, oh yeah, take care of my difficulty." —Michael M., Fb

It might not be the ideal-on the lookout lawn mower readily available — it Just about looks like a toy in the pictures — but it surely certainly does the job, and it’s trustworthy.

Treatment to get Wolverine shredding his meats to bits? Or how about Freddy Krueger and his signature four-bladed claws? In spite of who you adore like a claw-wielding character, you’ll find the Grill Beast Pulled Pork Shredder Claws to be Fantastic at pulling and shredding items of grilled meat so you receive to enjoy the most mouth watering pulled pork sandwiches in town.

In this article you will see a savvy selection of the most up-to-date know-how, kitchen area equipment, and cool gadgets to tinker with. We attempt to offer several of the coolest tech gadgets on the net all in one hassle-free place.

[technicallyoneofakind]

Poem for The Socially Awkward/Eventually... Or Eventually Not/I’m Sorry

I’m sorry.

I’m sorry I’m so lame.

That I find no point in going out to dance at a club-

For the music is too loud for my sensitive ears,

That it simultaneously both annoys me and frightens me.

For the people attending are strange and bizarre-

Crowding the center of the building,

Doing frantic, obscene dances towards one another.

I’m sorry my preference for entertainment is boring-

I’d rather sit at home and write fanfiction.

I’d rather listen to music on my own time than dance in a drunken stupor.

I’d just embarrass myself out there.

Because my body was not made to be glamorous-

Or to dance for lengthy expanses of time.

I prefer to sit back and watch a movie at home-

Rather than endure the intense thump of the bass attempting to pulverize my chest.

I’m sorry I don’t drink.

That your refreshments are all things I cannot have.

They often taste bitter to my tongue,

Like rotten food.

Perhaps next time you should consider something for my virgin palate…?

After all, fine hospitality dictates being fair to all guests.

Even someone as boring as me.

I’m sorry if I’m so dull and awkward.

I don’t have the experiences of everyone else.

I don’t have forays with multiple people-

Just multiple characters.

I cannot understand what’s so amazing about that.

I understand celebrating people-

But not people you may not see ever again after one night.

Not people who have hurt you.

Maybe I don’t understand it after all…

I’m sorry I just don’t get it.

I don’t get life.

I don’t get humanity.

I don’t get anything, not really.

But that’s just how I am, I guess…

I’m sorry I’m so dense,

So awkward, weird, off-putting, dense, and strange.

I’ll get there, eventually.

Maybe. Maybe not. I don’t know.

It takes me a while.

So, could you please… be patient?

Because my mind needs time to wrap around the concept.

It needs things to be broken down step by step for me to understand its purpose.

Because I can only grasp social constructs based on what I know.

Because I can only grasp concepts in general based on what I know.

So, when you present me with a problem, start with what I do know and slowly add.

When I don’t know what’s going on, be patient and please…

Just understand.

Human minds work in millions of different ways.

Mine is just slower on some than others.

Mine is like an older gaming computer or even…

A paintbrush versus a ballpoint pen.

It’ll get to the same problem and do the same rote routine.

The difference is in the technique and speed.

So I’m sorry, but please be patient, because I will get there…

Eventually. Or… Eventually not.