#but i can't fucking accept that all my time has to be spent on either going to work or looking for other jobs

[growing-fire]

Really really tempted to tell my brother's girlfriend to run while she still can... woke up this morning to my father screaming that he was going to kill my mother, ran downstairs to get in between them, screamed my brother's name to tray and get him to help me, he stayed in bed doing nothing. She fucking deserves better, and honestly so do I.

[barbies1shots]

I love the anon that asked for height & size difference for AOT

Can we get one with (your fav) but MHA

Love your writing 💕

hi anon! ofc, and thank you so much for reading<3

this is actually gender neutral, and chubby pups accepted!

☆- exhibitionism(in the classroom), size difference, praise, established relationship, overstim, free use, featuring AIZAWA SHOUTA♡

Aizawa Shouta has never been a soft man. always stern and nonchalant. you, bringing him food during his office hours or during his lunch break always turns in the wrong direction. since he is the Underground Pro hero, always working day in day night. teaching his class in the day while fighting ruthlessly at night, he seems to have no time to himself. but he always seems to make time to fuck you inside and out..

he sat lazily in his classroom chair with his head tilted back, and you were sitting on top of him, straddling him as you shifted on his thick thighs. your knees dug into his muscles, and your hands clutched the clothing covering his upper body.

you were just trembling like a small pup. just turns out you just can't take him by yourself:( needing help from him.

you had just the tip nudged into your gummy hole and he grunted, a low sound coming from his throat and he gripped your pudgy hips. his veins bulging through his skin.

"Either you do it right, or dont do it at all."

he grunted and began to steadily push your hips down. he just kept going as your pleasure filled whines grew louder. omg, since he is just so big, it just feels like he's in your guts:<

you cry out sharply when he planted his feet flat on the ground and lifted your body weight, only to let gravity have its way and drop you back down on his lap. he bucked into you, his black hair falling over his shoulders as he groanes from the tightness- or the warmness, or even the softness of your cunt.

he shut out your cries, even when you tried to push his arms away from coming to wrap around you to jack hammer his hips into yours. he shut out your begs that he was 'too good!' or 'too big, m' cant do it anymore!'

:((

he mumbled about how good you feel, that you were just amazing to him and that you couldn't get enough. that he just wanted more and more from your spent body. dragging orgasm and orgasm from your trembling body.

the way he dragged his thick tip from the rim of your hole to punching your g-spot had literal tears cascading down your flushed cheeks. his arms wrapped around your waist, and they were just so big while he had you pinned to his sculptured chest.

lifting you up before dropping you back down to meet the buck of his hips. the round getting his chair sopping wet and his pushed down pants soaked in jucies and liquids.

Aizawa needed to get all his stress and frustration out, and he needed to use you. he just needed you.

he needed the way you cared for him, the way you were concerned over him. he needed your reassurance. he needs your mind, soul, and body.

and now, your fucked out brain, sopping hole and a drooling, dumb mess on his shoulder? what more could Aizawa Shouta ask for?

AHHHH!! Aizawa is my literal husband. thank you for the ask, anon!<3

also, i want mutals, add me guys, im not scary:(

@aizawasbarb

[girlbossblackbeard]

THOUGHTS AND LAYERS

i spent literally an hour analyzing this trailer at 0.5 speed. this post is long af and these thoughts are in no particular order and are poorly organized:

-there's a big storm (which I think was already confirmed), and ed gets swept overboard by a bucket on a rope:

he then crawls up out of the water onto the beach

then goes into the forest, creates a hut, has a journey of healing and self-discovery, meets hornigold (or his ghost??)

and kills him thus killing the part of himself that he hated the most (his violence) as a parallel to stede finally getting rid of nigel's ghost by accepting and believing in himself

-in the stede/ed split screen, the stede shot is from the first ep of s2 right after stede finds the marooned crew at the end of ep 10 in s1 (you can tell bc his hair and clothes are still clean, there's no gay bandana around his neck, and that's his lil dinghy buttons is rowing)

-they go to shore and wind up at the merchants shop where "susan" overhears they're tracking down blackbeard

and she invites stede's crew onto her ship, cue the outfit change in the BTS photos:

-the way stede makes that little swishy turn in the red coat -

makes me think this may be first time he's been in fine clothes since his "death" and i hope we get a moment of him reflecting on how he gave up everything for ed only to have him hate him :( but then obviously realizing that ed is worth it and he'd do it all again in a heartbeat if it meant getting a chance at spending the rest of his life with him

-izzy and stede team up, and izzy is clearly training either himself or stede on the revenge (?)

soooooo many questions: what caused him to leave ed and join stede's crew? is he fighting with ed and is training to take him out or is he just done having his love be unrequited so he leaves and just so happens to stumble into stede? is izzy thinking that if he can't cut out the longing he has for ed he has to kill him instead so the pain will go away? what, pray tell, the fuck is going on in here on this day

-wee john in the mermaid costume (and olu in a bunny or donkey costume?):

a fuckery? or just a weird acid trip? OR IS IT THE TALENT SHOW THEY NEVER GOT TO HAVE??

-ed really does force everyone on his crew to wear war paint

-all the tally marks scratched into the walls - is that the number of days since stede bonnet broke ed's heart?

-ed in the forest in PEARL NECKLACE HELLOW????????

-the tear in ed's eye as he moves the cake toppers closer together which he also painted to make the lady look more like him he literlaly is in love wiht stede so bad wht the FUCJ

-ed's crew is murdering SO MANY PEOPLE at the wedding wtf (pic not included bc scary)

-delusional moment but i hope anne bonny on stede's lap is looking at calico jack off screen

-stede and ed are running towards each other on the black sand beach (thank you @sluterastede for pointing this out to me wtf!!!!!!)

which evolves my theory that ed in the forest goes through his healing journey and realizes he wants to openly love stede again but then the navy attack and stede just so happens to have found ed at the same time and they're fighting to get to each other and taking out everyone in their way (what if that was okracoke lmao)

-the swede and spanish jackie hooking up in the trailer

makes me think the bts shot of ed and jackie is them looking at stede and the swede, and ed being SO in love with stede obvi but jackie is watching the swede do some weirdly hot shit so she's gotta have him (what if they got married and he became her umpteenth husband in a drunken vegas-like shotgun wedding where she wakes up the next day to realize what has happened lmao)

-also this pic is DEF from the reunited/make up era bc ed's half-up hair, no makeup, soft eyes, and buttons' clothing. i am weeping

-stede in pain - is it an injury or a tattoo? or torture as @sluterastede posits?? he looks down at his lower body before screaming so maybe he knows what's about to happen to him??

-ed in the forest wearing the pearl necklace (see above), ed saying "fuck you stede bonnet" wearing the pearl necklace (see below)

does he pick it up at the wedding??? (theory credit to @sluterastede!!!! can u tell we watched the trailer together 400 times) i can't tell if he's wearing it in the one wide shot of him in that scene:

but regardless of when he acquires it, does he take it bc he remembers stede said he wears fine things well???? and he starts to believe he may deserve them??

-side note about a LACK of something: ed isn't wearing the cravat at all in the trailer near as i can tell, and he's not wearing the pearl necklace when throwing knives at the wall (at least from what I can see, which is not much) which leads me to believe that scene is in the earlier part of the season

-lastly, the most important song lyrics from the trailer (the beautiful ones by prince):

and that's my dissertation on the ofmd season 2 teaser trailer thank you

[niningtori]

see me | chapter four: together (final)

pairing: choi beomgyu x you

summary: after another failed relationship, you're ready to accept your fate as hopeless. choi beomgyu has other plans, though. or, beomgyu s your best friend's little brother and he's tired of you treating him like a kid.

genre: romance, angst, angst with a happy ending, best friend's brother au

word count: 3.4k (whoa)

notes: hi friends! happy easter to all who celebrate!! sorry this took me a bit to get out. i just love this story and this beomgyu so much i didn't want to rush it. i hope you're all satisfied with how this ends. see end of work for more notes :)

you're so out of it jia can't fucking take it anymore. 

"hello? come back to earth, please," she says, waving her hand in front of your face. "are you ever gonna tell me what the fuck happened with doyoon?"

it's been a few days since your return from the beach. suffice it to say, one painfully awkward drive was spent with you trying not to openly stare at beomgyu and him focusing intently on the scenery outside. 

you're actually a little surprised by her question. you genuinely haven't thought about your conversation with doyoon since you had it — you've simply been too preoccupied by the revelation that beomgyu has feelings for you.

"nothing much, really. he apologized to me and asked to get a drink sometime."

"what the fuck?! what did you say?!" 

"i said no," you reply simply. she's quiet for a moment before her face contorts into a deep frown.

"why do i get the feeling that that's not what's bothering you so much?" 

"because it's not," you admit with a sigh.

"then what is it? you've been weird ever since we got back."

you're torn for a while. how do you explain to your best friend that her kid brother is in love with you? or says he is, at least. 

"... it's about beomgyu. he—"

"oh, so he finally told you, huh?" she interrupts with a knowing look and you're absolutely flabbergasted.

"t-told me what?" you try feigning ignorance. maybe she's got it wrong?

"that he's been in love with you ever since he first saw you."

"how the fuck did you know that?!" you ask incredulously.

"you're my best friend and he's my brother. i know you two too well," she shrugs.

"so you knew this whole time and didn't tell me?" 

"well, to be honest, it was painfully obvious, but i didn't wanna embarrass either of you and it's, frankly, none of my business."

"i... wasn't he just drunk? i don't believe it…” you trail off.

"what do you mean?"

"i mean, he can't really mean it. he doesn't know what he wants. he's just a kid and—" 

"i'm going to stop you right there," she says sternly. "you may be oblivious, but don't you dare dismiss his feelings to make yourself feel comfortable. his feelings are real and he doesn't deserve to have you completely disregard them just because you can't face them." you flinch at her harshness.

"b-but he's never even hinted at it!" 

"never even hinted at it, my ass. that boy was all over you," she snorts. "did you really not notice anything this past week?" your eyebrows knit in confusion as you think back to all of the times the boy (man?) had interacted with you. suddenly, the unassuming touches and glances beomgyu shared with you hit you at a mile a minute. oh god, he was flirting? he was, wasn't he? and you just ruffled his hair and called him cute. 

but you're not done denying, denying, denying.

"i just don't understand. how could he like me when he's always with somebody new?"

"has it ever occurred to you that that's because he wants you to see him as a man and not the child you're so convinced he is?" you fall silent at this. no, it has never occurred to you, but now that she's said it, the puzzle pieces are starting to fit together in the most gut wrenching way.

"so he's been fucking around for years because he wants to prove something to me?"

"more or less, yeah." your head is spinning at this. so his feelings are sincere? 

"i... i don't know what to say."

"i figured you wouldn't," she hums.

"what do i do?" you ask with a newfound sense of panic. this is real. beomgyu actually love, loves you. 

"well, what do you want to do? it all depends on how you feel about him." 

"to be honest, i've never seen him as anything other than a brother," you sigh.

"and what about now?"

"i... i don't know. i'm just confused," you whine, digging your face into your hands and slightly tugging on your hair. when you think of the kiss you two shared, your heart skips a beat and butterflies arise in your stomach. well, that's new.

"honestly, i'll consider that progress. it's better than being brother-zoned." 

"jia!" you exclaim exasperatedly. "you're not helping. the boy i've thought of as a literal brother is in love with me and i've unknowingly treated him like shit for years." 

"yes, but i know and he knows that you didn’t mean it. look, even if you don't like him at all, don't you think he deserves a proper rejection at the very least?"

"you're right," you relent. "you’re always right.”

“well, i know,” she muses. “but before you decide anything, i want you to think about who’s been by your side all these years. when you didn’t have anyone else, who could you count on?”

“i —” you begin. 

“don’t answer yet. just think about it.” and think about it, you do.

-

the more time you’re left to think about what happened with him, the more confused you feel. beomgyu isn’t a child anymore, that much is clear, but does that mean you can undo the near decade of thinking of him as one? he’s handsome, sure, and that kiss nearly knocked you off of your feet, but can you really see him as a partner? as a man?

you’re not really sure. plus, what would happen if it didn’t work out? the choi’s are like family to you. they’re more of a family than your actual family ever was or ever will be. is it really worth gambling such an important piece of your heart for something that could easily end in heartbreak? but then, it’s broken, either way. can you really face the choi family again when you know beomgyu is in love with you and has been for such a long time? no, you can’t. not in good conscience. you’ve, intentionally or not, ignored beomgyu’s feelings for years now and you can’t ask him to bottle them back up for your own comfort.

you decide it's best to just talk to him. 

-

beomgyu doesn’t think that this is a good idea at all, actually. but his friends told him that rotting in his bed and crying like he has been for the past few days is even worse. when they put it like that, it didn't seem right to refuse their suggestion to have a double date with yeonjun. even still, he told them he wasn't ready to see someone new, but they said he was never seeing you in the first place. that sure shut him up. either way, it would be casual and yeonjun just needs a friend for his date's friend.

his "date" is nice enough, but she seems to have not gotten the memo that he's here as a wingman and not much else. she's trying to draw his attention by not-so-discreetly placing her hand on his thigh. gross. he genuinely thought about pretending to have a stomachache to cut the date short, but yeonjun had the bright idea of inviting the girls over after dinner. so now, as he sits on the couch of his and yeonjun’s shared apartment, he prays for god to intervene and end his suffering. 

a knock on the door pulls him out of his thoughts. please, god, let it be the maintenance man telling them they have to evacuate because of a gas leak. he almost jumps out of his seat to get to the door first, but yeonjun is closer and he says he’ll get it. fuck. before he can catch a glimpse of the mystery person at the door, his date speaks again.

“gyu?” the girl asks tentatively.

“mmm?” he says, turning back around to face her.

“do you like me?” she says while, once again, putting her hand on his thigh. alright. enough is enough. usually, he would tell her to beat it and leave it at that, but ever since you told him he doesn’t treat girls the nicest, he’s decided he’ll try to be better. he takes her hand from his lap into his and opts to just be truthful. 

“to be honest, i —” 

“beomie?”

oh, he’d recognize that voice anywhere, even in his sleep. his head whips around almost comically fast and he unintentionally yanks his hand from his date's as he stands straight up.

“w-what are you doing here?” he asks, incredibly flustered.

you should say something, but your eyes can’t help but linger where his hand was joined with the hand of the very lovely girl sitting beside him, even after he’s pulled away. oh my god. you’re interrupting, aren’t you? he’s moved on, but you’re standing there like an idiot. you need to say something. 

“i-i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to intrude,” you choke out. you don’t know why, but you feel like you’re about to cry. you feel so embarrassed. why did you even for a second think that this would play out any differently? 

“everybody out,” beomgyu says firmly. 

“what?” his date asks, genuinely in shock.

“i said, everybody else needs to get out of here. right now. besides you,” he says while gesturing to your pitiful frame.

“gyu, i live here,” yeonjun argues.

“out,” beomgyu repeats. yeonjun lifts his hands in surrender and leads the bewildered girls out of the apartment. 

now it's just you and beomgyu.

after the door shuts, the silence is as unbearable as it is palpable. beomgyu is staring at you with the same intensity as he was the night he confessed to you. you feel so vulnerable — so seen — you honestly kind of wish you had just snuck out with everyone else. 

“beomie, i’m so, so sorry. i didn’t mean to ruin your date. i can go, i just —” 

“do you know what i've noticed about you?” he quietly interrupts. you’re so taken aback, you’re stunned into silence. he sighs before he continues. “the way you say things are okay when someone fucks you over. it’s okay to be mad at me, you know?” 

“beomie, i’m not mad!” you insist. “you’re single, after all. i’m the one who —”

“i’m single, but i still told you i loved you a few days ago. why wouldn’t you be hurt?” once again, you’re left speechless at his maturity. when did he become more mature than you? or was he always this way, and you just never noticed?

“or is it that you just don’t care enough about me to be upset?” he's the one who looks small now and you worry you have the power to break him. he deserves an honest answer, so you think about how you felt when you saw his hand intertwined with that girl’s and your heart feels a nasty pang. 

“i… i am upset,” you pause and process that ugly feeling. “really upset, actually. but not angry.”

“i’m sorry,” he says, not without conviction. “yeonjun needed a date for his date’s friend, and i planned on rejecting her, but i’m really sorry i hurt you.” 

“... it’s alright,” you say carefully. “i understand. and i still think you don’t owe me anything, beomie.”

“but i want to owe you,” he says quietly.

“what do you mean?” you can’t help but ask. 

“i want to owe you. i want to make it up to you, and i want you to make it up to me.” you think you understand what he means. he wants you to make it up to him for not seeing him as he truly is all these years, but you just can’t understand his thinking.

“why?” you ask softly.

“why would you ask when you already know why?” he answers quietly with a sad smile. because he loves you.

“but why? why do you like me? you could have anyone. i’m wishy washy, i’m insecure. i’m just a mess, beomie. and i don’t want you to waste your time with me.” you hate the way your voice shakes. you wish, for once in your life, that you could be brave enough to say what you need to say without hesitating. you feel as small as a child, and in front of beomgyu of all people. but the dynamic you’ve always thought you had is becoming more and more twisted as you realize you’ve been very, very wrong about him, and maybe about yourself, too. beomgyu is not some kid. his feelings are not so easily written off, and that becomes even clearer when he says his next words in a haste. 

“don’t talk about yourself like that,” he says sharply, and his seriousness immediately derails your train of thought. “i’m not looking for anybody else. i… i don’t want anybody else. and i would never, ever feel like my time is wasted with you. every moment i spend with you is important to me.” you don’t mean for your eyes to get hot. truly, you don’t, but the boy’s words are so kind you’re unable to control yourself. 

“you really love me?” you ask at the risk of seeming annoying. you just have to be sure. 

“i do,” he says patiently. “i always have.” he isn’t sure what to make of you asking this. he has no hope now, but if it makes you feel better to hear him say he loves you a million times over, so be it. you’ve been hurt enough all your life, from your parents to your partners, if he’s able to comfort you even just a little bit, even if it’s never reciprocated, it’s enough for him. so he continues. 

“i’m… i’ve always thought about how to say this, so i’m sorry if it’s just too much for you. if it is, then just stop me, okay?” you can’t help but nod. “i just have to say that, to me, you are the most beautiful person in the world. i’ve wanted to tell you that since i was 14. i know you’re sad and i know you’ve been hurt before, and i wish i could take it all away. i’ve always wished i could take it all away. i know you think you deserve everything that’s happened to you so far, but i want you to know that that's not true, and it kills me that you’ve ever felt that way. i love everything you say you hate about yourself, because you’re you. i know you want to change, and i want you to know that i see how hard you’re trying. those flaws that make you a mess, or however you put it, only make me love you more because i can see how hard you’ve worked to get where you are. and if you don’t love me, even if you never do, that’s… it's okay. i just want you to be happy. and if i can be selfish, i want to be the one who helps you get there.” 

you don’t try to stifle your tears anymore. they are now flowing freely and your breath is heavy in your throat. he understands you. he sees you for everything that you are and were, and everything that you’re trying to be. has anyone ever made you feel this safe before? has anyone ever made you feel this loved and understood? 

you think back to what jia asked. when you didn’t have anyone else, who could you count on? if you didn’t trust any man in the world, you could trust beomgyu. that’s just how it is. you realize, even from the first night you met him, you’ve always been relying on him, in a way. why else would you feel so comfortable telling him about your anxieties mere hours after you spoke to him for the first time? 

things were one way then, but they could be different now. beomgyu loves you in a way that previously seemed inconceivable to you. what did you do to deserve this boy — this man? not a fucking thing, in your opinion, but now that you know how he really feels, is it possible to accept anything less than the love he is now presenting to you? maybe he’ll wake up one day and regret everything he’s said up until now, but you’re far too selfish to give up the heart he’s begging for you to take as your own.

you don’t know why, but you fling yourself into his arms, reminiscent of how you did all those years ago when he was just a teenage boy and you were just a heartbroken girl. he holds you like he did before, with an overwhelming sense of patience and security. he traces his hands lovingly up and down your back. 

“okay. okay, i want to try. i can’t promise that i’ll be perfect, i can’t even promise to be good, but i’ll try, okay? you’re so, so good, beomie. and i'm sorry for not realizing it sooner.”

he pulls away from your embrace and your cheeks feel hot when you catch his heated gaze. he looks down at you and if his look wasn’t enough, his next words certainly are:

“can i kiss you?”

“yes, beomie,” you whisper. 

"call me gyu," he says hoarsely. you gulp and pray he doesn't hear it.

he softly, reverently, pushes your stray hairs behind your ears and you realize he’s done so many times before. mainly when you were sad, but this time is… different. when his lips lock with yours, you're stunned into oblivion. there's so much fire behind it, but still, there’s a gentleness you’ve never known. as if he’s afraid of breaking you, he holds you like you’re a precious gem. usually, kisses are take take take from you, but he gives you so much love and care you feel like you’re floating. is this what love is supposed to feel like? so safe and so, so warm? 

he parts from you far too soon for your liking. his breath is labored and his cheeks are flushed. you look at him in confusion.

“i-i’m sorry, i just can't. if we keep going, i won't be able to control myself. i'm gonna —” 

“it's okay, gyu,” you whisper. “we can keep going.” he understands what you mean without you having to say anything more.

“are you sure?” he asks, just to be safe.

“i'm sure,” you answer without missing a beat. his lips curl up and he leads you to his bedroom, hand holding yours so tightly, it’s almost like he’s afraid to lose you.

-

the night is spent with beomgyu praising you like he’s never seen anything quite like you before. you feel his devotion with every passing moment and you can’t believe this is what you’ve been missing all these years. you’ve never felt so good, so cared for, in all your life. when you’re finished, and he’s cradling you in his arms, you’re both struggling to catch your breath. he looks at you like you hung the moon, but what you don’t know is that you’re starting look at him like that, too.

-

you’re so anxious. as you pull up to the choi’s family home in the passenger’s seat of beomgyu’s car, you can’t help but wring your hands together. this could be very good, or very, very bad. you can’t help but feel like you’re… betraying? the choi family by dating beomgyu. they’ve taken you in as family, but you’ve taken beomgyu as your own. do you regret that decision? well, you can’t say you do when beomgyu grabs your restless hands and comfortingly squeezes them before telling you “hey, it’s alright. don’t be nervous. i love you. they love you. everyone here loves you. just be yourself and i’ll take care of the rest, okay?” 

“okay,” you say shyly. you and beomgyu have been working on your self esteem. it was pretty slow going at first, but you’ve been pushing through. now, after three months, you’re a lot better, but there’s still room for improvement. beomgyu is nothing if not patient, though. after all, he’s been waiting for 8 years. how could he not be? and so he patiently coaxes you out of the car and into the house.

you two find your way inside and are greeted by his parents, jia, and yijun. nobody bats an eye at you two walking in together — they just greet and hug you as per usual, but their smiles drop and their faces turn serious when beomgyu announces he has something to tell everyone.

“guys, uh, we have something to tell you all,” he says, lacing his fingers with yours, “we’re together now.” you could hear a pin drop with how quiet the room is. mrs. choi is the first to break the silence.

“h-how long? how long has this been going on?” 

“three months,” he says cautiously. again, the room is silent.

“... only three? damn it!” mr. choi exclaims.

“i told you guys it hasn’t been very long,” jia sneers. “now pay up.” beomgyu’s parents grimace while pulling out their wallets and stuffing cash in jia’s hands.  

“pleasure doing business with you,” she teases with a shit-eating grin.

“um, guys? what’s going on? i’m kind of pouring my heart out over here,” beomgyu says irritatedly. 

“oh, honey. we know. we’ve known you liked her since she first stepped foot into our home. she was the only one who didn’t,” mrs. choi replies with a wave of her hand and your cheeks can’t help but heat up to an impossible degree. beomgyu finally pieces everything together while you’re still scrambling to understand what’s going on.

“oh my god, did you all make a bet to see how long it’d take for us to get together?!” beomgyu exclaims.

“more or less,” mr. choi says nonchalantly. realistically speaking, you and beomgyu should be angry, but all you two can do when you lock eyes with each other is laugh. 

“so you’re okay with it?” you ask meekly.

“of course we are!” mrs. choi says. “we couldn’t ask for a better match for our boy. we were just waiting for you to see that, too.” you can’t help but feel your eyes go sour. you hug his parents and they rub your hair. why would you think they’d do anything other than accept you? they always have.

that night, after all the board games and movies and laughter, you go out for some fresh air. you aren’t surprised in the slightest to see beomgyu sitting on the back porch steps, almost as if he’s been waiting for you. 

“there you are,” beomgyu says with a grin blooming on his face. you sit next to him, so close your thighs are touching. you lean your head against his shoulder and you sigh in contentment.

“that wasn’t so bad, was it?” he asks.

“not at all,” you smile, “but did everyone in the world know about us besides me?”

“pretty much, yeah,” he giggles and you playfully smack his chest. after your laughter dies down, beomgyu senses some hesitation from you. it feels like you want to say something to him.

“what is it?” he asks. you pull away from him and stare into his eyes. they look especially starry tonight.

“i have to tell you something,” you say, voice trembling slightly.

“mhm?” he nods.

“i think… actually, i know i love you, gyu. and i’m sorry it took me so long to get here, but i really do.” your eyes water when you see beomgyu’s doing the same. he looks so relieved, as if your words in particular are the ones he’s been waiting for all his life. and they are.

“i love you, too, if you haven’t guessed that already,” he says softly. “and i’d do everything all over again if it meant i’d get to be with you like this.” his eyes close and he leans in. you meet him halfway and press your lips together in a chaste kiss.

notes pt. 2: and that's it for them! i actually wrote a bit of smut for this, but i don't think it'll ever see the light of day i fear. as always, feedback is appreciated! i'd love to know what you all think :)

masterlist

[alessiamalfoyzabini]

Vampire's Kiss | Chapter Four

Pairing | Vampire!Jungkook x Reader

Word Count | 5,6k

Warnings | +18, MC and Jungkook joke a lot, fluff and some sensuality (smut in the next chapter 🤧) but also angst, provocation and threat at work, one of MC's bosses doesn't seem like a very good person 💀 (JK where are you?)

⤷ Summary | Humans have finally unveiled and accepted the centuries-old existence of vampires, in a modern world people share their lives with these peculiar and mysterious creatures, but it is not all roses.

Will two souls belonging to such different species be able to be together?

➢ Author's Note | Hi, guys! 🥹❤️

I'm finally back with a new chapter of VK, if you've read my previous posts then you'll know that I'm really writing a lot of stories at the moment that I can't wait for you to read, so I hope you enjoy this chapter in the meantime ❤️

Taglist: @katherine-kookie @peterstarkchrishiddleston @reallygenerouskoala @btsuga-d @angelicsmilesworld @jimincrystal @velvet-stardust2002 @ke1k029 @kylafox09 @pantara @takemeaway5402 @jkslaugh97

Chapter List - Previous - Next

It has officially been two weeks since your acquaintance with Jungkook began and things are going well. You just need to find a way to communicate to your family that ... well, their firstborn is seriously considering marriage to a vampire. Not that they have the right to decide for you or anything, and you also know that your mother would support you in anything, but the real big hurdles to overcome answer to the names of Dad and Mirae.

They will not be happy with such news, your sister might even try to assassinate him at the first possible opportunity, you shudder at the very thought of such a thing, you hope that Jungkook's beauty will divert her from committing such actions.

You are just thinking of calling your mother when the phone starts ringing nonstop, you check the name on the display and a smile arises spontaneously.

<<To what do I owe the honor of this call, Mr. Jeon?>>.

You hear laughter on the other end of the line, <<Uhm...I don't know, maybe I have good news for my sweet little human?>>.

You blush at the last words, but decide to tease him a little, <<Mr. Jeon finally decided to date yours truly?>>.

It is not unusual for company managers to work overtime, but Jungkook is working far too much of it. You haven't seen him since that evening at the beach spent exchanging first kisses and promises, since which time his schedule has become so busy as to be intolerable, at least for you.

You hear a whine on the other end of the phone, much like the whine of a puppy.

<<I don't like this distance either.... Seokjin is busy with wedding preparations and has left everything to us, Jimin is getting more and more distracted and it's up to me to sort out the messes he makes, sorry, it's hellish days>> it's not hard for you to imagine why Jimin is so uncaring, with parents like his there's a lot to lose your mind.

<<All right, all right... it's just that I miss you>> you mumble shyly covering your face, even though you are in the copy room and there is no one there to watch you.

<<Don't say that... this is where the good stuff comes in, Jimin has made Jin aware of the situation your company is in, a meeting has been arranged and it is likely that we will meet there>>.

You widen your eyes, trying to suppress the shriek that almost escapes your mouth. Jimin really did his part! When you see him again, you will jump on his neck to crush him in a strong hug.

And then... Jungkook will see where you work. You will meet as colleagues and ... e... oh, dear. You imagine him in a suit and tie, it must be such a sexy sight to-.

<<I know what you're imagining>> he hums like a nightingale, making your heart flutter.

<<What? I'm not imagining anything at all>> you immediately get defensive, unable to control the tremor in your tone.

<<So you didn't just imagine me in a suit and tie, did you?>> but what the fuck-, <<And you didn't imagine our eyes meeting with longing, me taking you by the hand ... to lead you into the copy room in the throes of a sudden urge, locking the door behind us to be left alone, you and me, in the complete intimacy of darkness>> you stare around alarmed, but what the fuck-.

<<How did you know I was in the copy room?>>.

<<I didn't know, I just guessed, you're at work and yet there's too much silence in the air around you, plus that's where I'd have the time of my life with my work colleague slash wonderful girl>>.

He wants to kill you or what, exactly?! Then to say such things while you are clearly in working hours, where everyone could hear him talking like that... that guy is your pleasurable torture.

<<This wonderful girl might decide to close the phone in your face in case you don't stop saying such nonsense!>> you blurt out with burning ears, cautiously looking at the door.

<<You won't, if you like me at least a little, you won't>> he says with great conviction.

You rest your back against the wall.

<<I like you very much, Mr. Jeon>>.

You close your eyelids and in the darkness that greets you you see him, sitting behind his desk with the phone handset pressed to his ear, a grin plastered on those perpetually rosy lips, his big dark eyes scrolling across the screen of his company computer. In your fantasy he has the first buttons of his shirt open, his long, wavy hair instead pulled back, leaving on display that pristine forehead on which you would have left a million kisses.

<<I really like you too, Y/N>>.

You nod, that may be enough for the moment, <<I know, I just hope you won't make me wait too long>>.

<<So... shall we make it the day after tomorrow?>>.

What?

<<What? What, the day after tomorrow?>> you croak in panic, not understanding what he is referring to.

<<Our date, of course! I want to take you somewhere nice, I've neglected you too much>>.

You smile smugly, suddenly calming down, <<Wow, Jeon Jungkook... you're just the boy of my dreams>>.

<<I was born to be, baby... aish, I have to go now, Yoongi is silently yelling at me to end the call…>> you giggle confusedly, who the heck is Yoongi?

The two of you say an unceremonious goodbye, according to him Yoongi is already in danger of throwing up his breakfast and wants to prevent that from happening.

You take the long-made photocopies from the machine and start to open the door, when you lift your eyes to the figure behind it you immediately jump in fright.

“Yoongyu! Goodness, what are you doing there?” you ask with one hand pressed at heart level, he stares at you strangely with his thin eyes reproachfully.

“Are you dating Jeon Jungkook, Y/N? I hope you know what he is,” you sigh, printing a fake smile on your face.

“A vampire? Yes, I know what he is and I don't care.”

You try to go around him to go straight for your own way, but he holds you by the shoulder, your heart churning anxiously as you cast a glance at his hand in amazement. What on earth is he doing?

Firmly you shrug him off, casting him a warning glance.

“I don't know what your problem is, but you have no right to put your hands on me like that, I hope this never happens again” your mind is stuck on what to do and not to do, he is your superior, but the two of you have always maintained a friendly relationship, even after your breakup. But it is also true that after that breakup he had never again allowed himself to touch you, not even in a gesture of greeting, so what the heck is wrong with him now?

He does not seem disturbed by your words, in fact, he smiles at them, “Are you going to let a vampire do it for me, then? Think about it, I put more than just a hand on you in the past, and I gave you all the time you needed to come back to me, now you come out seeing a vampire? And then, what? Are you going to look for a way to bring little monsters like him into the world? Don't be ridiculous and come back to me,” he tries again to touch you, this time stroking a lock of your hair, but once again you push him away.

Inside you feel like you're dying, your stomach is twisting from a sickening feeling. Who did you get so close to?

All the happiness you felt during your conversation with Jungkook has vanished into the air, in front of you is a real monster, one of those that hides in the shadows with a nice reassuring smile, posing as a human.

“Move over, Director. I don't have time to waste with you.”

He shakes his head, behind his eyes you can read irritation.

“You treat one of your superiors like this? Valentine had told me about this vampire fixation of yours, I investigated convinced it was just one of her usual nonsense, instead it's all true...I never expected such behavior from you, have you already forgotten me so easily with one of them?” you swallow your own air, you don't even have any saliva left to swallow, you stare over his shoulder in search of any exit, but block the passage entirely, there was little you could do.

“We ended our acquaintance because we wanted different things, do you remember that?”

“Yes, the excuse that you wanted something serious and I didn't... bullshit, the only obstacle at the moment is my mother, she wants me to marry an heiress, I could never let her down so I had decided to let you go... but to hear that you will so quietly give yourself to a bloodsucker fills me with anger, am I really that forgettable to you?”

You look at him in dismay, not only because he is talking to you so arrogantly, but also because of all the mean things he is spewing about vampires, about Jungkook.

“I'm telling you again, get out of my way before I scream,” you hiss forcefully despite your trembling legs, you know you'd have little to do against him, but that wouldn't stop you from defending yourself should the need arise, his status be damned.

But to your surprise he shifts, although his expression remained insolent.

“I need you to make a decision, don't make me wait too long, I'll be around for you.”

You take a big breath, trying to calm down, “I've already made a decision, I'm going to get on with my life and you need to stay out of it, before I report you,” you answer him harshly, before hurriedly stepping over him, returning to your office, ignoring his derisive chuckle.

There you find Valentine talking on the phone absentmindedly, your anger goes into your bloodstream as soon as you realize how quiet she is, despite the situation she has put you in, and you find your outlet, suddenly one of your hands slams down on the desk hard, right in front of her, who jumps in fright and stares at you shocked, as if you have suddenly gone crazy, hastily closes the call and then yells at you.

“What the hell is wrong with you!”

“How dare you tell Yoongyu my personal affairs! I don't think you had the right!” you are deaf to the pain in your hand, at that moment you would love to encircle her neck with your hands so that you could choke her with extreme comfort, but you try to control yourself.

Valentine pales, “W-Wait a minute! He was the one who asked me for information!”

Information?

“Information of what kind, Valentine?” you growl at her.

She wrings her hands in agitation, there you realize she's done more than just blurt out your experiences with boys lately.

“He wanted to know if you were dating ... and I told him you're hooked on that vampire app by now!” then she also says more, to your horror, ”He also wanted your personal phone number, said it was an emergency because he couldn't reach you on the one you use for work, and then ...”

Fuck, what else would there be?

“She asked me where you usually went out to eat when you went out, I thought you'd like to be wooed by someone like him, you're too hung up on those vampires, and Yoongyu is handsome, rich, and most of all, human!” she exclaims as if you have to necessarily agree with her. You, on the other hand, are realizing more and more that you have been working all this time with an unconscious madwoman.

“Maybe he didn't have my phone number because I didn't want him to have it? Did it seem smart to you to give it to him without even asking my consent, you jolly goose! Besides, you don't get to decide who I should or should not date! Get it through that empty head of yours!”

“What else could I do? He's the boss here and what he wants he'll get, don't think I wanted to give it to him so easily anyway! I resisted at first!”

You bring your hands to your face, betrayed so foolishly by one who should know absolutely nothing about you in the first place, fucking camaraderie among colleagues, “Don't you dare lie to me so shamelessly, we all know that everything you come to know then the rest of the building knows!”

Evidently your rant must have hurt her, since she leaves the office crying, but at that moment it matters little to you; you have much else to think about now. You collapse in your chair, exhausted. This is something to be taken seriously, so you have to talk to someone about it? Should you report it, so that if something happened to you, suspicion would be immediately on him?

And should you let Jungkook know about this situation?

Shake your head immediately, you need calm. You can't ruin someone's career in case it was words dictated solely by the anger of the moment, his distaste for vampires has poisoned his good judgment, that's all.

Nothing was going to happen.

Plus there was confidence between you, perhaps he thought you would not be bothered by that attitude of his, no matter how villainous.

But despite those thoughts, the next few hours are hell.

Once you leave work you begin to look around circumspectly, see shadows where there are none and hear nonexistent voices in the stretches of road with fewer people, because you forgot your car keys at home, leading you to make the foolish decision to ride the bus to work because of your laziness?

Do your shoulders curve under the weight of anxiety, are you in trouble?

Exactly two days have passed, nothing of all that you feared has happened. No disturbing messages, no harassing calls, and especially no shadows to haunt you every time you turn a corner. You were right, Yoongyu was all smoke and mirrors, fortunately.

With a calmer mind you continue to prepare for the evening you'll spend with Jungkook, let your hair down on your shoulders, treating it with the best products for its care, you want it to be soft and shiny for him. As for the dress, well, you chose it carefully. You don't know where it will take you, so your choice fell on a high-waisted sugar paper-colored, knee-length, simple and very pretty little dress with matching white heeled shoes and very natural makeup. You nod at your own reflection, you are proud of your appearance that night and nothing will change your opinion.

You take your handbag with everything you need and add a light white stole to it, the weather has been crazy in the last period and from practically summer days it has turned to very cold nights.

As if in a sort of Déjà Vu the doorbell rings gently to let you know there is someone waiting for you, you let out a sigh and arrived at the door you look through the peephole just in case, your eyes follow the smile that immediately opens on your face, this time it is not Jimin your knight.

You open the door wide and a wonderful floral smell invades you, the beautiful bouquet of flowers blocks your view and does not allow you to properly look at the boy who in a short time has become important in your life, you can make out white carnations and red and purple tulips on a bed of primroses, you take the colorful bouquet in your arms and inhale its scent, finally catching sight of Jungkook's angelic face.

“Hello, baby,” he murmurs as he looks at you spellbound, you have to fight against the fire that threatens to pervade your face, and to do so you hide almost completely behind the flowers that in moments cover you entirely.

“Hello to you, Mr. Jeon,” you drink in every detail of his appearance, from the growing hair let loose on his forehead to the jeans that bandage his well-shaped and toned legs, not to mention his chest that barely manages to be contained by the buttons on his navy blue shirt or the thin gold necklace that highlights his perfect neck.

“Before I got here I wanted to take you to dinner, now I'm of the opinion that it would be much better to stay home,” you try to suppress a laugh at the sight of his eyes trying, in vain, not to scan you like an infrared camera.

“Am I not suitable for a date with Jeon Jungkook?”

He shakes his head sorrowfully, “You are so beautiful that I will have to restrain myself from jumping at the throat of anyone who dares to look at you and desire you.”

Those words astonish you in no small way, it's the first time you've heard him say something like that, and in fact he winces.

“I really wouldn't do that, of course! It's against the law to kill, j-just kidding,” he clarifies nervously, blinking slowly.

He said 'It's against the law to kill,' instead of the usual and more typical 'I wouldn't hurt even a fly.'

This is meant to imply that in case of need he would be no trouble, and this strangely doesn't scare you, far from it, it makes you feel protected. He is a vampire, not a human being, and you appreciate every trait of him, from the most human to the most animalistic, even though Jungkook has never shown any of these.

You've never even seen him drink a single drop of blood and he doesn't seem willing to touch the subject, Jimin on the contrary has been happy to explain to you how the issue of nourishment works for vampires, perhaps Jungkook still doesn't feel comfortable with you.

“Jungkook, it is not and will never be a problem for me to hear you say such things, I have said worse in the past,” and it is all true, many times you have hoped that an axe would fall on the head of the usual boy who flirted with you in high school, or that the stupid, lackluster girl in the books would for once twist her ankle on those stilts she dared to call ‘shoes,’ whenever she came to school to threaten you with making her copy your tests.

“Oh, I should think so,” he takes a step toward you, stroking the tip of your nose with a finger in an affectionate gesture, ‘You sure have the face of someone who will never let anyone step on her toes,’ he nods amused, and you give him credit, because that's just the way it is.

You ask him to wait for you there, looking for a vase to put the expensive-looking flowers in, and when you come back you encircle his neck closing your eyes, sticking out your lips in what is a mute request, the kiss is not long in coming and you again enjoy the typical coldness of his soft lips, but this does not detract from the emotional warmth you feel, he is a careful and thoughtful kisser, one of those you can hardly forget.

When he pulls away his eyes are still half-closed and adoring, this makes you quiver internally.

“Can we go now?”

You nod without letting him tell you twice, and arm in arm with him you walk to his car parked a few meters away from your house, during the short walk you notice that your body is warmed only by his clothes, not his skin, how different can he be from you? Curiosity eats at you like a woodworm, you would love to ask him more about his species, but any time seems unsuitable for such a topic.

He gently opens the door for you, waiting for you to get in, and then goes around to the driver's side, in the car you can still detect a whiff of the floral scent that greeted you earlier in the house.

“What's with the flowers?” you ask, he gives you a puzzled look before starting the engine.

“Don't you like them?” he asks in turn, but you quickly deny it.

“Actually a lot, but it's been a while since I've received any, nowadays such gestures are considered too common and people don't do them anymore,” you sigh, maybe you're too old-fashioned, but you've been pleasantly impressed by them.

“It's people who give them a trivial meaning, flowers don't deserve to be called “common stuff”!” he exclaims seriously indignant, you burst out laughing and his gaze becomes confused, ”Why are you laughing? I'm serious!”

“Sorry, sorry! It's just... I don't know, maybe you were born in an era where no one would ever question certain romantic gestures and now you're nervous, you're so cute” you keep laughing with your hands in your face, trying to hold back, but after a few moments he too joins in.

“You're making me feel so old, I like flowers regardless of where and when I was born,” he clarifies proudly, leaving again when the traffic light kicks off, the city lights are so bright it looks like daytime, the little stores are still open, but few people are seen around at that hour.

“If only you would tell me exactly how old you are...” you throw in briefly, Jungkook shoots you a piercing glance from the mirror, you shrug your shoulders.

“Hey, you're smart ... but a hundred days haven't gone by yet.”

“Antipathetic...” you mutter in a low voice, sticking out your lower lip, he laughs at you, shaking his head.

After that he stops the car not far from a restaurant, it looks very nice and elegant, not obnoxiously glitzy, but intimate. Just the place for a date.

Out of the car he takes your hand, leading you past the small road and then toward the entrance, your footsteps ticking along with his quieter, more regular ones, he seems a little excited and how can you blame him? You're so flustered you think you won't eat anything, then again, it's Jungkook and you can safely be yourself.

A waiter comes up to you smiling, your attention immediately falls on the two front teeth that are sharper than the others, you study the environment, noticing how the colors are as warm as they are dark. Also, people whisper to each other, not letting you know what they were saying to human ears.

“Two days ago I made a reservation for two,” Jungkook is saying to the boy, who nods, asking him under what name he registered the reservation, although he seems to know Jungkook, perhaps he is a regular client. Past that part you are escorted to your table, which overlooks the restaurant's inner garden.

Jungkook pays no attention to the people who take to observing both of you after you pass their tables; you do. Their attention seems to be all on you, and you wish you had read the name of the restaurant so you could do your dutiful research, because it seems anything but a place habitually frequented by humans.

Not that there's any problem for you, but you don't want to be disruptive to the vampires present, you humans have a particular kind of smell that only they smell, which they might like as much as exactly the opposite.

Jungkook gently pulls your chair aside and you thank him with a nod; small candles have been scattered throughout the room, making the atmosphere more intimate.

“Do you like it?” he asks, pointing to the place.

“It's very nice, do you come here often?” investigation mode activated.

“It's my friend's restaurant, Taehyung, I've been a regular client since it opened, about...” he suddenly freezes, raising an eyebrow, “I know what you want to do, I'm not going to tell you when it opened,” he mutters, picking up his menu.

You snort through your nose; if he had told you how many years the restaurant has been open, you might have guessed roughly his age.

His dark eyes scan all the dishes on the menu very slowly, you're sure he knows that menu by heart, he's just wasting his time not to confront you, shaking his head you also take your menu and just follow his same actions.

There are many meat dishes, and it says in a note that they give the option to choose the type of cooking the client likes, clearly a vampire would have chosen a juicy, rare cut of meat, but you are not a vampire, so you choose a Korean dish that involves well-cooked meat.

“How was work?” you ask, bringing his attention back to you.

“Real hell, I told you Jin is busy with the wedding, right? That made Yoongi go ballistic,” he says contritely.

“Why? Wedding preparations are important!”

Jungkook looks around for a moment, then leans toward you with one hand covering his mouth, “Jin's brain has been more watered down lately than usual, he takes orders from his girlfriend and doesn't complain about it, the wedding was meant for next year, but that viper insisted it happen earlier and that messed up our schedule, we have more work than before, and Yoongi, our section chief, has been having nervous breakdowns several times.”

You bring a hand to your mouth trying not to laugh; it's the first time you've heard someone talk like that about Kim Seokjin. It must be nice to work with people with friendly faces, you think back to your situation with that fool Valentine and Yoongyu, a weight settles on your stomach.

“I wish I had friends at work, too, but instead I'm stuck with a moron who does everyone's business and even gets them into trouble.”

“Why settle for friends when you can have a boyfriend at work?”

The waiter arrives to bring you a bottle of red wine and water, beginning to pour the scarlet liquid inside the crystal glass, staring at Jungkook with plenty of eyes.

“What... What do you mean?” you stammer taking a sip of wine, Jungkook looks amused.

“What I said, from the way you talked about it you don't sound very satisfied with your job and I could use an assistant for photocopying,” he gives you a brief wink before drinking in turn.

You watch spellbound as you watch the sensual movement of his neck following the swallowing of the dark, full-bodied liquid; perhaps because of the alcohol, or perhaps just from the presence of the man, your body tingles uncomfortably.

You settle back in your chair, pulling the skirt of your dress lower, trying to cover both of your heated thighs. You certainly won't need the stole that night.

“Don't be silly, in that case I'd be your boss, not the assistant who prepares the photocopies,” you taunt him a little, he taps a finger on the table, his expression not changing, he's still wearing that slapping face.

“Oh, but photocopying would be a valid excuse to do much more, the use of a small key is the trick” what is he getting at?

You haven't even gotten beyond kissing and already he's talking about what you might be up to in the office. In front of a lot of vampires who can hear you talking then, has he gone mad?

“What are you getting at, Mr. Jeon?”

The waiter arrives to bring your dishes, Jungkook has chosen a rare steak, of course, but that doesn't make him look away from you.

Jungkook waits for the young man to leave before responding.

“Everywhere. I want to get everywhere, with you,” then quietly takes knife and fork waving you to start eating, you have to impose mental barriers on yourself not to think of dirty things that might turn you on more than before. Jungkook's words were crystal clear, as was the meaning behind them.

“Have you read Fifty Shades of Grey lately? You look like its protagonist,” you casually ask, before you take a bite, the flesh though well-cooked melts like butter and you almost groan with pleasure.

You don't know this friend of his, but boy, would you thank him for opening that restaurant, everything is really good.

Jungkook meanwhile wrinkles his nose, “Please, I'm so much better than that Christian Grey!”

You mock him, “You think so, and yet, you look like something out of that book.”

One of his eyebrows snaps upward, “How can I prove otherwise?”

You pretend you didn't hear him, so you change the subject.

“This date is also a chance to get to know each other more, right? So I can ask you everything,” he snorts through his nose, bringing his back to better observe you.

“Okay, okay... everything except age,” he points out, but that wouldn't be a problem for you.

Did he play with the dirty jokes? Well, you have a repertoire of such questions.

“First kiss?” you throw there without flinching, unlike Jungkook who tightens his lips trying not to laugh exasperatedly, ‘Explaining situation, person and environment’ you join your hands under your chin, with a completely innocent smile.

“You are... You are absurd! You want to find out my age any way you can!”

You bite your lower lip, smug.

“I only asked you when and to whom you had your first kiss, it's not that difficult... or maybe such a question embarrasses you?”

He forcefully resumes his glass, draining the last drop of wine with narrowed eyes, “I'll answer, as long as you do the same.”

“You are such a child.”

He raises his eyebrows and you roll your eyes, nodding.

“I was still living with my parents, but I was old enough to experience certain ... urges, throw in a broom cupboard and a girl a little older than me and the dish is served,” you raise an eyebrow.

“You kissed her just like that, without knowing her?” you ask in amazement, Jungkook hadn't seemed like such an easy guy.

He shrugs, “She was nice, plus she was visiting with her father, she needed someone to show her around the house while our parents were talking in the office... I offered and we liked each other, that's all,” you narrow your eyes.

You immediately banish any form of jealousy from your mind, after all, you too had other experiences before you met him, you must be a mature person.

“Exact age?” he ignores your question, asking another question.

“You?”

You?

You sigh a little.

Well, what about you... you certainly weren't as precocious as he was. You're embarrassed to admit it, but you came rather late to enjoy certain intimate aspects of a relationship.

“Nineteen years old, first boyfriend, the place was his house, more specifically the couch, his parents weren't home and we decided to experiment a little,” something in your words makes him laugh incredulously.

“Did you have to specify?” you sense annoyance in his tone and this makes you mentally lick your whiskers like a cat satisfied with dinner. “You specified that it was the broom cupboard!”

“And you that it was your boyfriend!”

He's not really angry, just annoyed, and you're loving this

“Shall we go ahead, first time?”

“Oh, dear...” he pinches his nose with two fingers as his broad chest vibrates under his giggles, ”It's our date, do you really want to hear me talk about former sex partners? Be serious, you just want to make me pay for it,” he says with conviction.

“Really... and what would be the reason?”

You move again, crossing your legs conspicuously, let the fabric of your dress flow a little over your smooth skin, and pretend to adjust it, making sure he notices.

In response he leans toward you again, completely amused by your actions, “You're tired of kisses and little caresses, you'd like our acquaintance to move to a more physical plane, and you're irritated by all this slowness.”

“And if that were really the case, what would you do then?” you blow provocatively.

He remains silent for a few moments before giving a polite nod to the waiter who was about to bring another bottle. You watch confused at his actions.

He murmurs something in his ear, and the young man nods, taking the wine with him. “What did you say to him?”

He puts on a completely innocent expression, “I just asked for the bill.”

[uchihaharlot]

Soooo, Madara fan is here, thanks for your last head canon about him. ^^

Can I get "what if Madara falls in love with the girl who is much younger than him (let's say he is 35? And she is 18 or 19). 😔🙏

Hello my little Madara nymphomaniac 🥵🥰 I did not forget you!! ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🔥 Sometimes inspiration finds me at awkward times.

NSFW; mild grooming; age gap fuckery; consensual; he brings all the girls to the yard; obsessed.

— Madara is definitely the kind of man to go for green girls. The younger, the better. Though he won’t touch one that’s not an adult. He’s a pervert, not a pedophile.

— It’s not something he seeks out either, these types of situations work best if the girl comes to him. He is always accepting the warmth of a woman, especially if she’s fawning over him and such.

— Absolutely loves, loves, loves fucking them into stupid little babbling idiots. These are the kind of girls who just broke up with their first boyfriend and never had a real man inside of them. Probably never had an actual orgasm until he rearranges their pussy. H O L Y Mackerel, when he does lobotomize them with pleasure.

— Now this particular girl though, she’s fiesty and demanding. Knows what she wants. Rocks the boat just as much as he does. Actually has Madara on edge before he’s even ready to cum. And it’s not that she’s different from most girls her age, but damn if she isn't liquid katon in his palms and on his cock.

— Edging him to his heart and cocks content until he flips her over and fucks her rotten into his mattress. The sounds she makes are sweeter than any sakura tree in bloom. Filling her soft cunt to the brim until she’s panting his name over and over. With no end in sight, they fuck like they had been well acclimated to one another for years.

— At the end of their little tryst, Madara can't decide who is more desperate for more. Him or her? Several rounds ensue until the late early hours of the morning. By the time he wakes up she's gone, which is unusual. Madara will typically spent the next several hours coaxing these young girls out of his bed and off his cock. But her?

— She just door dashed his cock and slipped out under the radar. There's something arousingly unholy about this situation. That unregistered fear of missing out kicks in and, well, he's an Uchiha. They tend to fuck hard and fall fast—usually on their terms, but damn she got him good. How aggravating it is to Madara that the seemingly obtainable has slipped through his fingers. Its not that he really wants her, but he feels slighted by her ability to fuck now and talk later never.

— Ok, maybe he is a bit jaded. More than jaded, actually. Since feelings are like the common cold to an Uchiha, he goes about waiting it out...not today old man. For some reason, it's not his cock that aches for her return, but a deeper throb. One right underneath the ribcage that makes his throat lump up with a sense of forlorn and abandonment. So, with this...uncharacteristic and intrusive as hell mindset. Madara searches for her.

— Elicits the help of friends, under the guise that she stole something valuable of his (his poor Uchiha heart). Which, to him isn't necessarily a lie....but not the full truth. He's mad with lust, would be ignorant enough to call it love almost. But that's too soon. His corneas don't make this any easier, he replays their salacious night together over and over until he has every curve and speckle on her skin memorized. 10/10 jacks off to it.

— When they finally do cross paths again, the unfamiliar squeeze of his heartstrings is nearly as taut as when she had came all over his length those some nights ago. Madara will act as indifferent as he can, but fuck if he doesn't look like dog on the street. Eyes ravaging her fully clothed form as she stands before him.

— If falling into this sort of thing for her is something she will agree to, there is not a single place on this earth she can ever hide that Madara's affections won't follow and swallow her whole. She's basically going to be treated as acting Uchiha royalty, for as long as she is by his side. No other girl dare crosses paths with this woman and Madara is finding his feelings easier to accept than he initially imagined.

[sixstepsaway]

I don't get why people want to pretend Ed wasn't abusive. Why do people insist on making everything into binaries? Yes, Ed has been a victim of abuse. Yes, he has been abusive. Both things can be true. I love him because I think he's in interesting and I understand where his pain is coming from (even if I think S2 was a missed opportunity in terms of character development). But anyway, thank you for writing about this because maybe some folks genuinely don't recognize abusive trends.

I think it has a lot to do with the fandom culture of only being allowed to like "wholesome" ships.

Look at it this way: when season 1 was airing, Ed and Stede were, in fact, very wholesome. Sure, they had some moments of lesser wholesomeness, but overall they were pretty wholesome and sweet and gentle. They were sweet and finding love in middle age and it was adorable. They had a general stamp of fandom approval that they were, in fact, Wholesome And Good To Ship™.

If you look at other fandoms, you'll see a lot of times there's the Good And Acceptable Ship and then there's the Bad Ship (or ships) and the Bad Ship is always slapped with the "oh that's actually incest!" label when they've, idk, grown up together, or "oh it's abusive!" because one of them one time made a bad joke or something, or "power dynamics!" because one is 27 and one is 25 or one is short and the other is tall or whatever, and yeah sometimes the Bad Ship is actually toxic or whatever (which is not a reason to not ship and enjoy it!), but they're put in neat little boxes: Good and Bad.

And for a lot of people, those boxes keep them safe. Last year, someone who was an Izzy Hands fan got doxxed because...? They liked Izzy Hands and shipped him with... I don't know actually. Ed? Stede? It doesn't matter, all I know is they got doxxed.

The side of fandom that thinks you should only ship the Good Ship are toxic and downright dangerous. It's happened again and again in numerous fandoms and just keeps happening.

So when at the end of s1, Ed turned around and cut Izzy's toe off and fed it to him, I think a lot of people panicked because shit, now Ed was Bad too, and if he's Bad then you can't like him or relate to him or ship him with the Good guy of Stede, so what the fuck do you do?

Obvious answer: Blame Izzy. Izzy's already classed as Bad, so put all the responsibility on Izzy for Ed's darkness and then it's safe to ship Ed and Stede again and no one can call you an abuse apologist or whatever for liking them together.

(To be clear: Shipping says nothing about your real morality. This is very clear for many reasons, one of which is... spend thirty seconds watching fans of the Wholesome Ships dox people and abuse people online lol)

So they spent all this time saying Ed was just scared and lashing out, and now s2 has come along and Ed is... well, abusive, canonically.

And for most of us, that doesn't really matter. We can still enjoy Ed and Stede or Ed and Izzy, we can throw ourselves into fanworks and enjoy the show for the things we like, and we can critique the things we have issues with (my problem is not Ed being written as dark and twisty and having a villain arc, my problem is the show writing it badly, exploring it badly, and then handwaving it, because it's shitty writing) and still really enjoy the vibes we got from the show.

But for people who are scared because they spent all this time saying Izzy fans should kill themselves for liking an abuser, well... now they have a choice: either admit Ed is an abuser and admit that liking a character doesn't dictate your irl morality, nor does it say anything about you aside from what you enjoy in fiction, or excuse away his actions, insist he's just a lil meow meow and continue feeling safe in their little bubble.

In a lot of ways I can't blame people for wanting to duck and cover from it. I mean, look at the shit people get for liking characters who aren't perfect, or talking about the imperfections of characters, or just enjoying complex narratives!

But what genuinely concerns me isn't anything to do with the fiction really, it's when people look at Ed's behavior in 2x01 and 2x02 and go, "Nah he's fine," because oh, honey, no, you are making yourself so vulnerable to real life abuse. That is what worries me, which is why I answered that one ask saying Ed wasn't abusive, it felt important to point out why he is.

Anyway, that's what I think is happening here. I think people are just scared that if they admit their fave has multitudes and isn't a perfect character who never does any wrong, they'll get doxxed and abused and harassed online.

I get that.

[femdomlieeh]

Notebook of a fool ✧ Xiaojun

BFF!Xiaojun ✧ Crush!Fem!Reader

WC—3.8 ✧ k

WARNING—anxiety ✧ heartbreak ✧ crying ✧ pet names

THEMES—sfw ✧ light angst ✧ future fluff (?) ✧ best friend au ✧ crush au

NOW PLAYING—OTT ✧ IVE

A/N. 누나 (nuna) = older sister

psst! Next update is a Beomgyu smut… probably my fav smut I’ve ever written

M.LISTS—wayv ✧ latest updates ✧ read on wp

All rights reserved © femdomlieeh

✧ ੈ ✧ ‧₊˚ * ੈ ✧‧₊˚＊* ੈ ✧ ‧₊˚ * ੈ ✧‧₊˚＊* ✧ ੈ ✧

Today was one of those bad fucking days. One of those days when you can't find any positivity in anything. One of those days when you don't feel like talking to the people you love the most. One of those days when you just want to give up.

The first thing you saw in the morning was a notification of a text from your boyfriend. Looking at the white speech bubble is something you usually look forward to when you see Wonwoo's name bright up your screen, knowing he always has something entertaining to tell.

But this particular morning he said something you wish were a joke.

Wonwoo Boo💞

[ive been thinking lately and _____ i think we need a break]

Mommy🤠💦

[You're not going to tell me why?]

Seen 10:17

You asked him the first thing that came to your mind. He couldn't possibly just expect you to be OK with having a break without a reason, right?

After an hour you accepted the fact that he had left you on read and that he wasn't going to reply anytime soon.

Maybe it was because he called you _____.

He never called you by your name. Only your friends called you that. He was supposed to call you weird or cheesy pet names and nothing else! 

He left you with a headache. He left you with your bad thoughts and theories. Damn you, Wonwoo.

It was very human-like of you to be in a bad mood. Only a robot would feel nothing in this situation. The day wouldn't get any worse. You were going to make sure of it! Your mood may have been bad, but you weren't going to let anyone else get affected by it. Lashing out on innocent people because you don't feel good on the inside is something you hated doing.

Today you were going to hang out with your best friend, Xiaojun, have a picnic on a park next to the Han river. Xiaojun had packed a cute pink basket (that he had specifically bought for you two to use for picnics together since they happened at least thrice a month) which was filled with kimchi kimbap, green grapes, two clementines and some churro flavored chips and you had packed a large outdoor blanket so Xiaojun wouldn't have too much to carry. For almost a week you two hadn't met up and you both missed each other and wanted to make up for the days you had spent apart so of course you went for the nice, typical not-romantic-at-all picnic hang out session.

But no.

You weren't going to meet Xiaojun and ruin his parade with the rain cloud that was following you around wherever you went since you opened your eyes this dark morning. No, you weren't going to let the first time you two meet in such a long time be ruined by the sad news you got this ugly morning.

누나 🥰

[I can't hang out today, sorry]

Prince Junnie🦄

[why not?☹️]

누나 🥰

[I'm not feeling too well]

Prince Junnie🦄

[it's ok i'll make u some delicious soup😊]

누나 🥰

[No, you don't need to, I don't want you to get sick!]

Prince Junnie🦄

[but ive missed u sm☹️]

누나 🥰

[We'll meet another day I promise to make up for this!]

And so you put the phone gently on the table to lay on the sofa and binge watch some random show. You made sure to turn your phone off first since you knew you'd cut Wonwoo some slack in case you read any persuasive text from him — he's good with words and making you feel loved. Whilst you were looking through all the lists Netflix had created for you, which were filled with movies and series you either had already seen or weren't interested in, Xiaojun was still expectantly waiting for his screen to go bright.

She must be joking, he thought.

Unlike you, Xiaojun's morning had started out brilliant. From the moment he opened his eyes, he was smiling and full of energy, excited to hang out with you after not seeing you for five whole days. He had missed you. Spending time with you was one of his favorite hobbies! Since you two had picnics regularly you two had decided that you would take turns in deciding and packing the picnic basket and this time it was Xiaojun's turn! He had been so excited all week, planning out a shopping list days before. He had specifically purchased grapes this time because he had this fantasy of putting one in your mouth (which sounded weird, but it would feel intimate to feed you fruit) and also playing around and throwing grapes up in the air and catching them in the mouth. 

Needless to say, he liked you a little more than a best friend should and that was a bit of a problem. His friends kept telling him that it was stupid to spend so much time with you and that Xiaojun should either try to ignore his emotions or he should distance himself from you until he loses feelings, because it was unfair to hurt himself by giving himself false hopes of getting somewhere with a taken girl. 

And Xiaojun knew it. For so long, he'd known that it was a bad idea to like you. You didn't like him in the same way, and you even had a boyfriend for fuck's sake — and a really pretty one at that! But no matter how many red flags there were, he still wanted to spend everyday with you. He didn't want a week to go by without being with you. He wanted to cuddle with you on a picnic blanket. He wanted to kiss you when you visited photo booths. He wanted to share hoodies with you. He wanted to stay up late and talk until you two fell asleep in each others' arms. He wanted to be the only one you called Prince. 

Wondering why you called Xiaojun 'Prince' when you already were in a relationship with Wonwoo? Well, Prince had been Xiaojun's nickname before you even met Wonwoo (yes, you'd known Xiaojun longer than you'd known Wonwoo, yet you still found yourself in a relationship with the latter — or not anymore actually). And though your (then) boyfriend never liked it, you had convinced him it was just a friendly pet name. Because that's exactly what it was.

To you.

To Xiaojun it was the closest he'd ever feel to being your boyfriend. But you started using that pet name less and ever since Wonwoo came around and ruined everything more than it already was ruined. Xiaojun even had to change his contact name on your phone to include the word 'Prince' so you wouldn't forget to call him that.

He loathed Wonwoo.

Wonwoo was always the reason why you couldn't hang out with your bestfriend for too long, why you couldn't call him Prince on certain occasions and why you couldn't look at him as a potential boyfriend. Wonwoo was an attention thief. Not really. But it felt like it. Xiaojun was jealous of everything Wonwoo had with you.

Because your boyfriend obviously was a threat, Xiaojun felt like he needed even more of your validation than before (which was already a lot). He needed your attention. If you ignored him he'd think it was your way of telling him that you had left him completely for Wonwoo. Ridiculous! He shouldn't feel like you owe attention to him.

Your friendly fucking friendship was the closest thing Xiaojun had to being together with you in the way he really wanted, so he valued it a lot. Not having you as his girlfriend was painful enough, but not having you as even his friend would break him.

Right now you weren't validating your time together, nor your friendship — or at least it felt like it to Xiaojun. He always needed your attention and unlike normally, he wasn't getting it right now. His smile dropped and so did his excitement for the day.

Was this the end?

He knew that spending one week without each other would lead to more time for you to spend with your damn boyfriend but he didn't know it would lead to the end of your friendship. 

No way he'd bail on the picnic plans.

Prince Junnie🦄

[can i pls come over? i bought fruits for u<33 i'm sure fruits is exactly what u need right now!!]

Prince Junnie🦄

[idc if i get sick or not bc i still wanna hang out w u]

Prince Junnie🦄

[pls 누나]

Sent 11:33

You had ignored him only once before and it was a horrible experience.

The way you ignored him (on accident) was so hurtful that he had to leave the gathering that he had looked forward to for so long, confusing the other guests, to go and lock himself in a bathroom so he could cry without bothering anyone. You'd gone right after him since you knew it wasn't very Xiaojun-like to leave a fun time for no reason. After you had knocked on the door and reassured him you were his best friend and not a random person coming to make fun of him, he let you in the bathroom.

The sight you were met by was his crumbling figure on the floor and overflowing tears on his cheeks. He had thought that you wanted nothing to do with him. Stupid you didn't see the obvious signs. It was because of the fact that you hadn't paid any attention to him that Xiaojun had gotten the idea that you had grown bored of him or that you wanted to leave him for Wonwoo (he hadn't told you the latter part, of course). And weeks later you did get together with Wonwoo. And that made him cry himself to sleep for days which you never knew.

How much your lack of attention and affection for Xiaojun had affected him was scary. And a fucking sign, you idiot. Nobody gets so worked up over the loss of affection of someone they view as a friend. Ever since that incident you'd made sure to always remind him of how much you value your friendship.

Except for today.

He thought he had made it clear enough to you that you never ever should ignore him unless you really meant It. Unless you really wanted to part ways. To go from the bestest friends to cold acquaintances. Some people might think it's crazy to be this attached to a best friend but you weren't just his best friend. You were his love and happiness. Without you he didn't have either.

Five minutes passed since he triple texted you and he still had no reply. Slowly he felt how his tummy was turning into knots and how his eyes started stinging.

Prince Junnie🦄

[ur making me worried]

Prince Junnie🦄

[hey!! text me so ik u didn't die from choking on strawberry milk 누나😰]

Prince Junnie🦄

[r u ignoring me?🫠]

Prince Junnie🦄

[unless u have corona, meet me by the river at 6 if u care abt me. i need to talk to u abt smth important]

Sent 12:04

If you didn't show up he knew for sure that you had left him behind forever. If you did show up then he'd confess to you. So spontaneously he couldn't keep his feelings away from you for another year because it wasn't healthy and he knew it. He knew he would have to tell you about his feelings sooner or later. And after being without you for a whole ass week and after experiencing the cruel punishment that is being ignored and even thinking you broke your dear friendship off, he knew the time had come for him to finally woman up and confess.

Whilst he was anxiously thinking through why he made such a bold move and possibly ruined any future he had with you, the girl he loved was being lazy and stuffing her face in pillows in front of a TV.

one season of Bojack Horseman later...

Tossed between blankets and an overflow of pillows, your tummy roared like a lion. You hadn't eaten anything yet. Maybe it was time to do something other than numbing your feelings with Netflix and the drinks you had at home? As you stood up you felt heavy. You had moved maximum 100 meters in the past few hours — to go to the bathroom, then kitchen and back to the living room — and it had taken a toll on your body physically.

Fuck.

You sat back down on your sofa and brought your phone to view after hours without it.

[6 new messages from Prince Junnie🦄]

Fuck. The last message was sent so long ago. You looked at your windows. It was dark outside. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. As fast as you physically could, you put on a pair of shoes and a jacket with your aching limbs.

In just a few minutes you were on your way to the closest bus station. The whole bus ride to the river was filled with thoughts putting you down. Your favorite person in the world was sensitive about this stuff and you hurt him. You were supposed to not let your bad mood affect anybody around you. But who were you kidding? Of course something had to go wrong with an idea you constructed and analyzed for four microseconds.

Before you knew it you had arrived at the destination. You were speed walking to the river. You two always went to the exact same spot by the river since it was usually vacant, by some miracle, and had a pretty view of a bridge.

You were naive enough to think that isolating yourself from your bestfriend and your phone would help solve your problems, so you were certainly naive enough to go and check if Xiaojun was still at your meeting place hours after you were supposed to meet him. What if he wasn't there? What if he was there?

The water was shimmering from the moonlight and next to it was a bench and an athletic, tall silhouette. Your eyes widened. Could it be...? Sniffles. That's the sound that came from their direction. You walked closer and could make out the lines of a figure that was all too familiar.

"Prince?"

The silhouette turned around and though it was dark you could see that it in fact was him. You quickly sat down beside him and noticed that a couple of notebooks were scattered on the ground next to a bike. You didn't know what to do, never having seen glad Xiaojun cry. After another particularly loud sniffle you turned your attention back to him. The light of the moon exposed the redness and tears on his face. For hours he'd been outside and his face was still wet with tears.

"Why are you still out at this hour?"

He choked on his tears and rested his face in his hands, "Because I'm a fool."

"No, you're not a—"

"Why are you here?" he interrupted you.

Touché.

"You told me to meet you if I care about you."

"You come here hours later as if I don't mean anything to you," he hurried out before his voice could crack.

"I'm sorry about that. But if I didn't care about you I wouldn't show up at all," you spoke with a soft tone. The last thing you wanted was to be harsh, especially since you were the reason your best friend was upset.

"Why did you do this to me, 누나?" he looked you in the eyes as if he'd find any answers inside them.

"I promise I didn't do it on purpose. I would never hurt you on purpose," you took his hands into yours, oblivious to how the simple gesture made Xiaojun a bit hopeful on the inside.

His hands were so cold it was shocking that he was shaking because of his crying and not because of the ice-like coldness. That's what happens when you're out for hours when there's no sun — or person — to keep you warm.

"I saw the messages 20 minutes ago and got here immediately. I would never purposely ignore you, Prince."

You made sure to use his nickname in almost every sentence you spoke, silently telling him that you don't want to fight. Slowly you brought his hands to your lips and kissed them lightly, five kisses on each hand for every finger. He looked at your lovely action and felt how his tears were slowing down. The kisses didn't make him warm — maybe for a second — but at least they made him feel somewhat better inside.

"I'm so, so sorry you had to be here in the cold," you apologized and kept his hands in yours as an attempt to warm them.

One part of Xiaojun wanted to continue being mad and make you feel bad for the hurt you'd caused him but the bigger part wanted you to hold him in your arms. He loved you and couldn't stay mad at you for long even if he tried.

"I-It's OK, 누나. At least you're here now," he whispered and looked at your locked hands, admiring the sight since it may never happen again — or maybe he should make sure his hands are cold more often—

You sent him a sorrowful smile and let his head rest on your shoulder, resting your own against it as an instinct, both from being comfortable and tired.

"From now on I will check if I have any texts every hour for you," you said with an exaggerated joking voice to lighten the mood.

He giggled. You weren't even being that funny but you were both tired and sad, so anything even a tiny bit funny was hilarious to both of you.

"What did you want to tell me before, Prince?" you whispered into his fluffy hair and petted it.

Should he tell you how he feels? Should he possibly ruin this? If he told you how he truly felt, would you ever kiss him hands like you did just now? Would you ever touch him this caringly ever again? Would you continue to call him Prince? Or would all of that be gone due to your loyalty to your sweet precious boyfriend Wonwoo?

For hours Xiaojun had been outside in the cold waiting for the love of his life so he could tell her the truth. But it took time before you, the love of his life, showed up. Too long.

When a person is alone outside with notebooks filled with blank pages to write feelings and stories in, it's easy to let emotions take over. He ended up writing around seven poems. Some poems were really cheesy and written in the spirit of the moment. Some didn't even rhyme. Some were a perfect description of where he was in him non-existent love life.

But they all had one thing in common.

They were melancholic and written from the point of view of a man who was hopelessly in love with his best friend.

"Nothing. I just wanted to have a picnic with you, 누나. I was just being dramatic to convince you to come despite feeling under the weather," he lied right through his teeth.

That made no sense because you two had never been on a picnic after sunset and Xiaojun would never lie to make you come see him. But you were tired and desperate to leave the cold outside, so you chuckled lightly, believing him immediately.

"Then where are the snacks?" you asked, confused since the only things around you were notebooks, a bike and water.

"I ate them."

Laughter filled the air; your genuine one and his fake one.

You put your face in his cheek, making him blush (not that you'd notice, since his cheeks were already red from before), "Well, my tummy is a little too thin right now, so let's go somewhere."

"In the middle of the night?" he questioned.

"Yes," you smiled against his cheek and he felt it, making him smile too.

"OK."

You both were still smiling when you were picking up all the notebooks to get ready for the ride. Jokes were thrown here and there. It was as if nothing had happened. You both knew it was a misunderstanding and you valued the friendship with the other too much to put energy into arguing. And you were tired too, so the argument wouldn't even be that epic even if you tried.

"What about your bike?" 

"Oh nooo! The buses are always so full now that it's too late to take the subway!" Xiaojun whined.

"You know what? Since I was a jerk you can go take a warm bus while I ride in the cold," you said impulsively.

"B-But, 누나—" he smiled, flattered. 

"B-But nothing," you interrupted him and sat down on the bike. Anyone who had spoken to you knew you were stubborn. He laughed. The little sadness he had left was gone by now. His cheeks were dry. Still red, but not from crying, now they were red from blushing.

"OK, whatever you say, 누나."

"You brought a transport card right?" you made sure since he came by bike.

"Yes I did~ See you in an hour, 누나," he winked at you and waved with a smile brighter than the moon before running to the bus that just arrived.

You waved back to him and got ready to bike — you definitely needed a head start. But before you started you couldn't help but see something white standing out in the darkness.

It was another one of Xiaojun's notebooks. You must've been too tired to notice it when you were picking them up. Thankfully the notebook was open or else you wouldn't have noticed it as it had a dark cover. You took it into your hands. To make sure it really was Xiaojun's you needed to read at least a snippet.

You prayed it was Xiaojun's because it would be worse if you read a stranger's private thoughts than your best friend's since you already knew all him secrets. The snippet was Xiaojun's. It was from one of the pages of poems that didn't rhyme, that was very cheesy but depicted how sappy he was feeling and also told him part of the story that you never knew.

I want to feel my best friend's lips on my lips

I want, more than anything, her to call me HER Prince

You drop the book on the grass. So that's what he wanted to tell you.

[gabessquishytum]

Hob is the loud alpha-male CEO of his company and Dream is his soft spoken executive assistant, so when hob announces that “he and Dream are having a baby” everyone assumes that Hob knocked Dream up!

The office sends around flowers and Dream accepts them with a quiet satisfaction and puts them in a vase on hob’s desk.

But weirdly hob isn’t being all that chivalrous. Even though he accompanies Dream to the doctor’s office every time, Dream’s the one opening the door for hob. And carrying his briefcase!

The office gossips are all grumbling about how hob is kind of a terrible, thoughtless baby daddy.

Until after a week away—a week Dream spent glaring at everyone who dared talk to him—hob returns to the office with swollen hoboobies and a cute little baby bump!

Turns out Dream’s the one who knocked hob up, peeling him out of his nice suits and railing him over his desk after hours. And he’s a very proud and chivalrous baby daddy.

He rubs hob’s shoulders and fucks him through the wild pregnancy hormones. And hob may be a busy ceo but if anyone dares schedule a meeting with hob after 3:30, when he should be lowering his stress level, no god will spare them Dream’s wrath.

Every time I see a mere mention of pregnant!Hob i go feral. I cannot be stopped. This scenario absolutely bounced around my brain like a pinball.

I'm just obsessed with the before/after situation in the office, from the point of view of those who work around Dream and Hob. Hob is a real man's man, always joking around, always one of the lads. He's loud and brash, and people either find him charming or irritating. He's the guy who WOULD knock up his PA and maybe be a jerk about it. It's all such a cliche it's almost boring.

And one morning there he is, buttons straining on his crisp white shirt, pressing his hands into his lower back and sighing deeply. He's wearing a bra. And he looks tired, but pretty much content. Especially when Dream comes over and offers him a sandwich and a kiss on the cheek. He also rests a proprietary hand on the baby bump. The office has gone completely silent as people stare, or text absent coworkers with the latest gossip.

The guys who used go joke around with Hob and who thought he was so "cool" don't know what to do with themselves. He's the boss, so they can't ignore him! But the dude is pregnant! What the actual fuck! The worst of it all is that Hob looks like an absolute snack as he waddles walks around the office. He's glowing, he's lush, he's fecund. He's still a badass CEO, maybe even more basass before because the hormones really get him raging sometimes. Dream is keeping strict tabs on his blood pressure.

What else is Dream doing? He's strolling around looking smug. He put that baby inside Hob, and he's never been more proud. And he's taking very very good care of both Hob and the baby. Even if that means running out of the office for weird fast food combinations when the pregnancy cravings start to hit.

Dream is also fucking Hob silly in as many places around the office as possible. They're hoping to do it in every single individual room, conference space and cubicle by the time Hob’s parental leave starts. They're almost halfway through already - no wonder Hob is pregnant. Hopefully the baby will never find out that they were conceived up against the water cooler, after office hours!

[morally-grey-girlbosses]

Propaganda under the cut.

Han Sooyoung:

She's the designated morally grey person of her found family (they accepted her reluctantly cuz she did some evil (morally grey) stuff. She literally has to kill the protagonist multiple times (or be the one to take the initiative) because no one else wants to and she's the only one 'evil' enough to do it. She has such an interesting relationship with the 'completely morally good' characters in the story and by interesting I mean so gay and so fucked up! Also she's my cringefail babygirl and deserves to win. Did i mention the alternate universe where she saves everyone by dooming one person but her goal at the end is to abandon everyone anyway? The part where she destroys the world and passively kills thousands of people (they don't just die once either) and makes someone experience literal hell just to save one person... Yeah

honestly she kinda sucks but in a soaking wet cat way (affectionate). she might be a plagiarist but she did it better anyway (rip tls123). she's got a lot of problems, but luckily most of them can be solved by the massive amount of money she makes as an author and celestial twitch streamer, money which she also uses to publically flex multiple times. the first to come to mind is the time she went on a date and he was talking down to her, so she pulled out the keys to her expensive car and said he didn't make enough money for her (or something similar, either way she basically told him to fuck off). the problems that can't be solved by money exist because she is living through the apocalypse, and she's still successful despite that. she started a cult at the start of the apocalypse to make use of her plagiarism, which i think was also just a way for her to survive. she's replacing her smoking habit with lemon candy and we love to see a positive change like that

Nadja of Antipaxos:

Effortlessly girlboss. Bisexual icon that makes me swoon and want to smooch her. Eats people and drinks their blood. She'd have me for dinner and forget about it the next day (valid). Absolute icon and an inspiration to us all

She just is THAT bitch. She does whatever the fuck she wants. Turn a rabdom girl she spent some time with into a vampire? Yeah sure. Make up a vampire nightclub and then steal her own money from it? You go girl. She is a girlbossloser, she doesn't give a shit about it, and then cries about being a girlbossloser. Just. Iconic.

[justallihere]

aNOTHER play by play of my thoughts <3

I kid you not the entire time I was reading this the audio of Klaus saying "MOMMY ISSUES" was playing in my head

Lilith really said, "I'm going to be useful when I come to my kids by brining riders AND insert myself into the military lol"

OMG OMG DEVERA AND FELIX!!!!!

I'm assuming their mother is a particularly touchy subject between Mira and Vi (i lowkey felt uncomfortable reading their conversation in a good way but I also wanted to diffuse the situation between the two 💀 LOL) Mira needs a goddamn award. The mental gymnastics of trying to love/defend her mom but also understanding Vi's own personal feelings and her position as queen is rough

Mira telling Vi she's the favorite (likely bc she's the baby bc let's be for real here lol) Vi thinking its Brennan makes my heart break for Mira because what about her???? (No slight against Vi or B but my heart aches for Mira too, as the eldest daughter). All of them need a goddamn hug

This line HIT , when did this become a therapy session LMAO

“It’s okay if it’s not enough, and it’s also okay if you let it be enough. If you try, too,” she added pointedly, “instead of being stubborn about it. She left the country she’s dedicated her entire life to because of you.” 

Not Mira begrudgingly accepting Xaden and knowing that he's antsy as fuck w/o Vi

“Go home to your insufferable husband,” she said. “You probably stressed him out.” 

The dragons finally fucked and X and Vi had to do something about it. The spicy scene was 10/10!!!! I have so much respect for ppl who write smut well bc I can't do it LOL but what i really appreciated was the attention to detail of X getting her conduit for her so that she doesn't burn down the kingdom 💀. My exact thoughts were "wait is her mom going to know their fucking bc of the lightening" but then I didn't even need to think about that bc you HAD IT COVERED LOL

Lilith is so complex and I love her for it. I bet the room was frigid when Brennan and Lilth spoke.

Naolin was mentioned and I am SOBBING. I hope RY expands on him but idk if it will make it to canon tbh

Glad this was sorted out bc I know this was a particular fan theory that was RAMPANT. I never particularly agreed w it

“Dead?” Lilith repeated.  “The storm the day I crossed the parapet—” “I had nothing to do with that,” she interrupted. 

I am terrified and excited for what is to come Alli 😭. Again another lovely chapter that I thoroughly enjoyed from start to finish

So many mommy issues. All the mommy issues.

One thing about Lilith is that she has a purpose, and that purpose is protecting her kids, and because she's emotionally distant she'll just do things for them instead of with them.

I'm obsessed with Felix. He's such a fun character, just so much personality even though we see next to nothing of him in canon. Same with Devera! They feel the same to me in a lot ways I think.

Lilith is a touchy subject among all the Sorrengail children for sure, but definitely with Mira and Vi because Mira has spent so long trying to keep the peace between the two of them. And (in this world) Mira has been there for Violet in a maternal role a bit, so she sees the choices Lilith makes differently than Vi does and relates to them more, where Violet just sees that it's not what she needs from her mom.

This became a therapy session...somewhere around chapter 10, probably.

Idk what it is but I just love a dragon lust-fueled sex moment. Hits different, you know?

I can't believe I wrote a positive thing about Brennan Sorrengail 🤮 never happening again. Naolin is still just so intriguing though, I also hope we get to hear more about him in canon (I don't want him to be venin, I want him to be dead, to be clear).

I never particularly bought into the "Lilith tried to kill Violet on the parapet" thing either, especially once we learned about the deal she'd made with Xaden. She just loves Violet so much.

I, too, am excited and terrified for what's to come! Mostly excited!

[rose-morose]

I finished Harley Quinn, and I've got to rant about Kite Man for a second

(Harley Quinn spoilers and very very long and bitter hatred under the cut)

it fucking boggles my mind that Poison Ivy would go out with this rich, incompetent, ignorant, heteronormative, entitled, arrogant, borderline, if not outright, misogynistic trust fund child who is a massive cunt, and seemingly the antithesis of everything that she stands for

most of the time she seems to find his clumsy and ignorant conduct to be endearing, which is actually understandable, but beyond that and a positive review of the sex (I think I can't remember) it kind of seemed like she wasn't fully invested in their relationship

this isn't even a "she's out of his league" thing either, he is just genuinely a terrible terrible person, and I think many people give him far more credit than he deserves

putting aside his goofy kite motif, his naive demeanour, and his clumsy antics he just has a dull shitty personality

when they first met, Kite Man spent an entire evening making unwelcome advances on Ivy despite her clear and succinct rejections of every effort he made, stole from her, and then he took Ivy asking him for an emergency ride back to her apartment to literally save the lives of children that HE poisoned for no reason as not only validation of his relentless advances, but the beginning of what he believed to be a "date" in his deluded rotting brain

upon arriving at her apartment, unprompted, he disrobed and waited for her in her bedroom to have sex, and when Ivy asked him why, his response was along the lines of 'that's usually what happens after a great date when you go back to the girl's place'

Ivy was understandably upset by this, so what happened? what changed? in what mad world is this given any amount of consideration to even be tolerable, let alone acceptable behaviour?

"I'll do all the heavy lifting so you don't have to break a nail." fuck this twat he sucks, and this is only episode 2, the first fucking episode that he is in

"I'll protect us babe!" dude fuck right off she is literally the most powerful person in the room

"If my girlfriend sees me hanging out with you hot young coeds she is going to be green with envy." people still call women attending uni "coeds" that's fucking insane, someone just put me out of my fucking misery

HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW HER FUCKING NAME! "Poison Gertrude Ivy" 0/3 fucker not even remotely close, and he doesn't learn her name until after the third fucking time he asks her to marry him

so what if it's played as a joke, it's still true

what am I missing here? why is this guy getting a pass, not just from Ivy, but from the fandom at large? why is there such widespread admiration of this asshole?

I tried watching the Kite Man spinoff show to figure out what people see in him, but it honestly just made him look even worse if that's possible, and while the entire show has not yet been released, it is set after the conclusion of Kite Man and Ivy's relationship so it's not even that relevant

if anyone from the Harley Quinn show deserves a spinoff it isn't this cunt

this shitty excuse of a human being maps out their entire future without consulting Ivy, self admittedly stalked her, constantly does things that she explicitly asks him not to do (admittedly Harley is also guilty of this), mansplains simple bullshit to her constantly, and takes not even the slightest bit of interest in anything remotely associated with Poison Ivy, he doesn't even really seem to know that much about her

on paper I can't see why the hell she even seems to like him at all seeing as she repeatedly rebuffed his initial unwelcome attempts to hit on her, was embarrassed to be seen in public with him, did not tell anybody she was dating him, constantly comments on how fucking stupid he is, rejected him every time he tried to take the next step in their relationship, and before they got together the nicest thing she had ever said to him was along the lines of, 'you're almost tolerable when you are completely silent' and yet in practice Ivy seems to be very loving and affectionate towards him, she even attributes her recent bout of happiness to him

yet Kite Man himself admits that he had to repeat every step of their relationship over and over and over again because she constantly rejected him at every turn

and she was the only one putting any effort into their relationship, always doing things to make him more comfortable or happy and in return occasionally getting a ride and that's it, he just breaks down and starts crying when anything doesn't go his way

Poison Ivy deserves so much better than this cunt who weaselled his way into her life, not the other way around

I saw something from a showrunner about how this iteration of Poison Ivy has self esteem issues that may have lead her to date someone who isn't worthy of her just because he was nice to her, but I don't see how he was nice to her

he's usually polite, sure, but he is super misogynistic, he asks her to drop her name to get things that he wants, he is super arrogant and full of himself, and he seems to objectify her every time he tries to give her a compliment

and that hardly explains why so many fans are all for this terrible relationship, normally supporting unhealthy relationships in media because you want to see them improve and evolve is fun, but this guy does not change, he doesn't even think that he needs to change

and I think most of the show's fans are for Harlivy, which is a relationship that isn't super healthy but is compelling and improving and is fun to root for, but why do I see so many people saying that the writers should have kept going with Kite Man and Ivy?

I don't think it's outright homophobia, or at least the majority isn't homophobia, but I just don't get it

now did Kite Man deserve to be cheated on? I don't think so, that's just a pretty shitty thing to do to someone, but why the fuck was he even here in the first place?

I guess the heart wants what the heart wants or she didn't think she deserved better or whatever, but fuck why does anyone tolerate this asshole? is incompetence really that charming?

maybe I just don't get it because I'm aroace, but regardless of what you think of the relationship or the character, Kite Man is undoubtably a shit person and a complete asshole, that doesn't make him a bad character, just a bad person, and I wish more people that liked him as a character would recognise that, it's fine to like characters that are bad people, but don't outright deny it

just my final thoughts, I would love to take this opportunity to assure all 0 readers that have made it this far that I am not genuinely upset and do not take issue with people that like a fictional character that I don't like ok thanks bye

rant over

[crush-like-that]

byler ficlet, i suppose

in relation to this post

________

"You know, my mom told me that, one day, I'd fall in love." Mike startles out of his thoughts, blinking a few times before he looks at Will. The two of them are strewn across Mike's bed, all lazy and half asleep from the heat. Not unbearable heat, but the comfortable kind, the kind that feels like a pile of blankets fresh from the dryer. The light that pours in from the window is no help, either, all golden and honey like. Up until Will had spoken, Mike wasn't sure if he was entirely awake. He realizes that he's been quiet too long, staring too long, and he opens his mouth to reply. Will beats him to it. "I thought she was crazy, said I'd never do that." Will looks... sad. It's a hard emotion for Mike to understand, it's difficult to find one word for it. It feels like the loss of hope. The acceptance of reality. Something Mike can't really begin to understand, and he hates it. Mike knows everything about Will, he can pick up on the slightest of changes. He's spent so much of his life just watching. Reading Will is practically second nature. So when Mike can't understand him, it's unnerving. He hesitates again, looking for the proper words. "Did you? Fall in love, I mean." Mike doesn't know if that's the right question to ask. Maybe he's pushing a boundary, maybe Will is going to scoff and leave Mike here to rot in his own room. Will smiles. Mike knows he hasn't made a mistake, hasn't fucked up his friendship again. But it's not a happy smile and that's obvious enough. Again comes the look of loss. Loss, loss, loss. Loss of what? What could have left Will looking like this? "I did," Will says, and his voice sounds incredibly small. "I was already in love when I said it, but I just... I don't deserve it, I think."

Just a few words, and Mike is on high alert. He sits up straighter, leaning in just so he's closer to Will. Will knows how serious Mike is, he has to. "You do. You deserve love." Mike can't begin to explain why the idea of Will being unworthy of love feels so wrong. His mind is racing and, not for the first time, he lets the thoughts tumble out of his mouth. "You're great, Will. More than great. You're my best friend, okay? Like- no that's not right. I mean, you are my best friend! But I just mean that you are the best friend. You understand everything so well, you know what to say and when to say it, when to wait and when to push. You're smart in so many ways and you're kind of a nerd. You tease your siblings and your friends, but no one can ever be mad cause it's funny. You're sweet, Will, too sweet for your own good. Everyone loves you! I'm positive that you're going to meet someone who loves you just the way you deserve." Mike pauses before nodding and folding his hands in his lap. That's... right. It's all true and he hopes it gets his point across.

The room falls quiet again, air thick with some sort of tension. Mike's eyes stay on Will, the same as always. Watching, staring, waiting for the slightest change. So he notices the slight pink that creeps its way up Will's cheeks. He notices it and he knows he's not wrong because it certainly wasn't there a few minutes ago. "You really mean that?" The question catches Mike off guard and again, it feels wrong that Will is doubting. Mike would never lie to Will, certainly not things like this.

"Every word." There's a sort of certainty to his voice, a deep rooted confidence that he hasn't expressed in years. Mike has always thought highly of Will, but who wouldn't. Who wouldn't love Will? Will is... well Will is Will. There's no one else like him. He's kind and caring and quick with sarcastic comments. He has great manners and tends to be a bit shy in front of new people. He's soft and subtle, the same way the light is from the window. Mike doesn't think he'd connected that before. Will reminds him of early Saturday mornings, waking up when the sun hasn't yet completely risen, so the light comes in heavy waves. Heavy, heavy, heavy, the warmth and comfort is nearly enough to lull him back to sleep. But to sleep would mean to miss the beauty of it, all golden and bright with oranges and occasional pinks. It's subtle, such a contrast from the blaring sun at noon. Mike by no means knows anything about art, but that early morning golden light? It's a masterpiece of nature, there's no denying it. And Will is like that in every sense. Soft smiles with teeth that just barely poke out, bubbling laughter, moles that create the most perfect constellations, strong jaw and strong build that is in no way sharp. All warm, soft, subtle, and beautiful. Mike can't let himself think about it too long, lest he discover something new about himself.

Apparently, Mike has been staring too long, because Will fidgets with his hands and clears his throat nervously. Before Mike can fully process what he’s doing, he simply continues talking. “On top of all that, you look really nice. Objectively, I mean.” Will’s eyes go wide and suddenly he’s staring back at Mike but Mike can’t stop now so he just averts his gaze and keeps going. He gestures with his hands as he talks, desperately hoping that he doesn’t look too embarrassed. “I mean, you’ve got- shit. You’ve got a nice jaw structure. And you’re–” with one hand, he points to Will and, with the other, moves his hand across his own chest “-- broad, and I think girls like that. Your eyes are really pretty, too, they’re-” Mike pauses for a second, leaning in just a bit closer and squinting as he studies Will’s eyes. “Wow, actually I take back what I was going to say. There’s so many different colors going on there. It’s like a kaleidoscope, but with more natural colors. Does that make sense? And you’ve got a really addictive laugh, like once you hear it you’ll do anything to hear it again. And you just-” Mike lets the sentence fall flat as he finally looks back to Will, who looks about as red as Mike feels. He isn’t sure why he said any of it, but he did, and it’s out there now. There’s no taking it back. Mike doesn’t think he’d want to take it back, though, even if he could. Will’s cheeks are rosy and his kaleidoscope eyes won’t stop shifting, newly colored flecks appearing constantly. "You're just you, Will." His voice comes out too soft, too gentle, to honest. Too obvious. But Will has to know he's serious. "I don't know how anyone couldn't love you."

[blushblushbear]

How do you think the immortal guys react to realizing that their S/O is mortal?

dead ass had to back it up and remind myself who all is immortal lol XD

So I think it's safe to say all of them would try and find a work around the moment they realized

I think all of them had the same or a similar thought process of 'heh, my little mortal s/o is so cute. mortals are so silly! ........................SHIT.'

Stirling: doesn't panic but he is still taken a back a bit. realization sucker punched him out of no where. I feel like he'd spend the next month or two calling in favors and thumbing through spellbooks. He wouldn't tell you he's doing it though. He'd play it cool, then surprise you with it one day and would not take no for an answer. 'I got you a potion to turn you immortal, drink up darling'

yes I know he is a vampire and could turn you into a vampire too. Yes you will have to point that out to him as an option. yes he will feel stupid he forgot about that.

In his defense, he spent so long thinking of you as a snack in one way or another, it probably never even crossed his mind to change the dynamic

Seth: also does not panic, but is like '*narrows eyes* Satan damn it.' Probably goes through a few options like Stirling but ultimately ends up doing some form of spell or curse or blessing--- whichever he could make happen on his own or could get someone to do for him without having to owe them one. (that's a big owe and he can find other ways thanks)

Full on does not tell you he's going to do it, he's trying to do it, or when he's done it. He might not even tell you for a while. He also wants it to be a surprise but like--- a funny one. Make the moment memorable ya know?

He'd either wait till you've noticed yourself or wait till you find out the hard way. He's very proud of himself for pulling this off though. You should totally pay him back! How about starting with a kiss??

Reece: is Reece immortal?? eh, he's close enough. Reece would realize it randomly one day, probably while pointing out 'you are only human' or something like that-- then launch into quirky nerdy panic cause FUCK YOU'RE HUMAN! YOU GUYS DIE LIKE-- ALL THE TIME! OH. NO.

Also ends up digging through files/books and looking into favors but does it in a sci-fi way. It probably ends with you getting some kind of sci-fi device that's basically magic that stops time but only for you. Like a pocket watch that halts your aging and therefore your dying so long as you wear it. It's a little like a wedding ring the way he presents it.

Unlike the other two though, he really does make it a choice. And it's a choice you can back out of for any reason if you need to. (well slowly of course)

or pass it down! ....or sell it if you must. No need to waste a perfectly good age defying magic space pocket watch!

so I'm gonna say now I think all the Kitsune guys pry/ask/demand/make a deal with the gods to give you immortality. They need to be careful they don't accidentally turn you into something not human that you really don't want to be and also have to remember to include not aging in the deal, but I will say I think somehow they make it happen! I also feel like they all end up at 3 different gods who handle it somewhat differently. Also the blessing has a physical form that you have to accept. No gods will be forcing immortality on you today! As for some finer details...

Aki: when he realizes it he panics. Aki joins Reece in the panics about it crew. A LIFE TIME WITHOUT HIS BUNNY??? HAVING TO WATCH THEM GROW OLD AND DIE?! Okay the old part is fine BUT NOT THE DYING PART! I think Aki's god is a goddess who he pleads so sincerely and dramatically (this boy is big anime crying-- ghibli tears and heaving sobs) He even offers to give up all jokes and pranks in exchange for the blessing. The goddess can't help but be won over by his earnestness. She agrees to the blessing so long as he loves and treasures his Bunny with this same level of sincerity every day.

Honestly things go really well for Aki lol!

I think the blessing takes the form of a candy! Yum!

Haru: I think Haru tries to deny his panic. He's cool on the outside, if maybe a little bothered, but it continues to eat away at him deeply. He's never had to contemplate moving on from a real relationship cause he's low key never really had one. He's been dumped before (hard to believe I know) but he never really cared and got over it pretty quickly.

But what happens to him when he actually has to move on from the one person he could never imagine moving on from? What happens when you're gone?? I think at one point he did consider 'oh I'll find a way to move on, I'm me', but the more he thought it over and the more he looked at you and realized you wouldn't be there someday, the more he realized that not only might he not actually be able to; he really doesn't want to.

He ends up telling you all this--- I think for a while he was going to just disappear for a bit with little notice and just-- hopefully come back with this blessing from you, but I think he didn't want to leave you on a lurch. He wants you to know what he's doing, he wants you to be part of this, this is YOUR future together, and he wants to make sure it's what you really want. That HE'S what you really want.

If you agree to spend this eternity with him, I think he ends up off in the spirit realm, full on questing for a god who'd be willing to do this for him. I think he ends up with an elder god of the forest who is well aware of who Haru is and isn't buying it. 'Immortality can be as much of a curse as it is a blessing-- and you wish me to put that burden upon some poor innocent simply because the player does not wish to loose his play thing??'

It takes a lot of convincing before the god even considers Haru's legitimately this committed. Eventually the god caves on one condition-- if he ever were to kiss or lay with another, his lover with loss their immortality.

'Better they are allowed to move on, then to live with having to be forsaken by the likes of you...'

basically he puts the ball in Haru's court, and he plans to run with it straight back to you.

I think the blessing takes form of a blossom you must eat!

Fuyu: He is actually another member of the panic squad. Although it's less comedic and more like an attack.

He has a panic attack about it is what I'm saying.

I think he blazes off onto a trail (he leaves a note 'Back soon. Love you. Fuyu <3') and straight to an ancient powerful mountain god that he knows takes refuge at the snowy top of the tallest mountain. I think he's initial pitch is a mix of plea and demand.

'GODS OF THE HEAVENS! MAKE MY LOVE IMMORTAL!'

It doesn't go down smooth at first.

'What business does a beast such as you have in shouting your demands to the heavens?' a voice booms back.

Fuyu is taken aback, both because the god is frightful but also because in his heated haste, he didn't realize how shouty he was being.

He drops to his knees, forehead to the snow covered ground as he asks again more humbly.

'Please-- I beg of you. My wretched loneliness has finally been broken-- I do not wish to ever know the sting of that curse again!'

The god turns to him, a bit more curious,

'do you really think a day of sunshine will melt the snow atop the mountain?? Or that a few months of peace will wash the blood from your hands??'

He doesn't know how to respond to that. Fuyu has spent a while making a mends, but the mountain god is right. How was he ever to truly make amends... If he is a changed man-- how does he show it??

'What must I do?' He asks, peaking shyly up from the snow. The mountain god sighs, and thinks on it a while. Fuyu is practically buried in the building snow when the booming voice finally replies.

'Such a blessing requires absolute change... only that would be worth such a gift... Here, Fox-- take this to your love,' an envelope of tea and a small dagger fall from the heavens and lands before Fuyu, 'Have them drink the tea of the heavens, and know this-- If ever draw a drop of blood from another again-- they will die.'

When he journey's back down, Fuyu finds you waiting for him. He doesn't fully realize how long he's been gone-- he kind of flew off in a hurry. He tells you of his journey, his goal, the blessing he has returned with. He actually doesn't even know if you'll accept it. If you do, be makes you the best cup of tea you've ever tasted-- the wax seal opened by his new blade, which immediately sheathed, and hidden deep away.

He is a changed man-- and he intends to stay that way. ...Especially now that your life depends on it...

[a-very-tired-jew]

Dropout Discord Keeps on Giving

You'd think with the server shutting down / freezing in a week or so that there would not be anything to report, but you'd be wrong.

In the past few days the current batch of users, specifically that one young Jew who believes all of us are brainwashed, have been posting some out there stuff.

I have the screen shots but at this point it can be summarized as Everyone is Brainwashed but Me still thinks their family is brainwashed and they can't be honest with them about the Truth™ without being labeled a "traitor". But they know the Truth™ that this is a Genocide and the worst thing ever and their family doesn't (remember this is someone in their early 20s). Their family gave them Noa Tishby's book to read and its full of Zionist lies and propaganda. In response another use recommended this link.

Fig. 1. User responding to Everyone is Brainwashed but Me with a video to "argue" back with.

This video features Dr. Lara Sheehi. If you don't know who that is, Dr. Sheehi has a history of antisemitic behavior and targeting of Jews in her classes. Dr. Sheehi has openly supported Hamas and her social media was the infamous Blackflaghag that posted such wonderful things as "FUCK YOU AND FUCK YOUR AID". Profiles on Dr. Sheehi repeat the same thing that much of her time as a professor was spent demonizing Jews and Israel and trying to recruit people to BDS and other causes.

She was a professor at GWU and the university's investigation "cleared" her. However, the Office of Civil Rights opened an investigation into her and suddenly she left GWU in January 2024 and is now a professor at the Doha Institute for Graduate Studies in Qatar. Considering that Qatar has funneled billions of dollars into the USA collegiate system, was host to leaders of Hamas for years, and their state media acts as a mouth piece for Hamas, it's not surprising that she would end up there considering the amount of work she did for the Cause™ in the USA.

I doubt anyone will point out any of this to them, nor would they accept it as anything other than "Hasbara". Later, they tell us that they finished the book and that it's full of apartheid denial and denial that Israel is a colonial state (there's a collage of pictures in between the two comments that I won't include here).

Fig. 2. Everyone is Brainwashed but Me mentions finishing the book.

The apartheid argument is one I have seen come up a multitude of times by activists, and it makes no sense to me. Apartheid, as defined, is the discriminatory authoritarian ruling of the majority by a minority population that results in segregation based on race within a country. As many have previously established, Arab Israelis have the same rights as all other non-Arab Israelis. They are part of the government, military, businesses, and so on. If the argument is to be made that there is apartheid like laws regarding Palestinians...well that makes no sense. The Palestinian territories are their own separate entity with their own separate governments, laws, and structures. Meaning, Palestinians entering Israel from Gaza or the WB are foreign nationals, they will of course be subject to different laws. In fact, every country has a set of laws for foreign nationals that differ in some capacity from the laws that govern their civilians. So we either have the Palestinian territories actually being a part of Israel in the mind of activists, which only area C could be considered this, or they're separate entities entirely. Area C gets into a whole realm of murky politicking that is outside of my realm of expertise, but it's the only place where I can see this argument hold any weight (and yes, the settlement stuff is bullshit and the military laws get into a whole weird realm of things, I'm well aware of this). However, I have yet to encounter any Western Activists acknowledging the complexity of Area C and the international laws and regulations regarding it, let alone the average activist even knowing the difference between the Areas, Israel, and Palestinian territories. Now, I have seen the lack of a right of return for Palestinians be used as an argument that Israel is an apartheid state. And again, I have to ask how? This type of law is not characteristic of apartheid as we know and define it. But again, if we get into this territory then what happens? Do they become Israelis or are they Palestinian citizens? What laws are they subject to? If they're foreign nationals living in Israel due to a right of return then they have different laws that adhere to them, which is not part of an apartheid system. If they become Israeli citizens then they have all the rights given to them as citizens. Neither of these support the claim. Simply put, they insist Israel is an apartheid state and when you mention any form of the above they call you a racist spreading propaganda and then shut down any meaningful discussion (in Dropout's case they kick you from the server for pointing out how wrong they are about things). We have a clear definition of what apartheid means and what practices are involved, but like "genocide" it seems that this definition has gone out the window and is now defined as anything people want it to be. As for the colonial state argument, who is Israel a colony of? And don't say the USA or the UK, that would mean that they send resources back to those countries, are taxed by them, their government is controlled in every capacity by them, and so much more. Considering anti-Zionists like to say the USA's government is controlled by Israel, it's quite contradictory. It appears that so much of the Western Activist's antisemitism anti-Zionism is couched within just believing everything Jews Israelis Zionists say is lies while openly believing a terrorist organization's narrative (an organization that I, once again, need remind everyone is on record saying they would manipulate Westerns into believing their narrative regardless of its veracity).

[giantkillerjack]

the average person doesn't expect you to be a perfect ethical consumer, that's not possible for the vast majority of us. but what youre saying is it's better to do nothing at all and choose the worst possible options (sweat shops, overseas shipping waste, idea/product theft, all wrapped up in SHEIN) than to put even the tiniest effort in where you can.

[they are referring to this post]

What I said was "some people are doing literally everything they can to survive and have no extra bandwidth to spend extra time and money on their purchases, and it is cruel and therefore un-punk to gatekeep punkness and add additional shame to these people's lives based on that fact."

I think it's still a good thing to try to ethically consume; I literally never said it wasn't. I had never even heard of SHEIN before. Rather, I am much more concerned about what I saw as arbitrary gatekeeping based on ability and income.

And frankly how dare you claim that I am supporting sweatshops and abuse by saying that this additional work you are demanding (in this case, presumably, vetting every clothing company you buy from) is not always possible for people. It is not a light accusation to accuse me of supporting abuse.

"How dare you say we piss on the poor", Etc. 🙄 this isn't Twitter. You are determined to enforce moral purity, but you are failing to see the nuance.

Because when I say "no extra bandwidth," I mean no extra bandwidth. This is not the "car shows it's on E but actually secretly it has a lot of gas left" situation that abled people constantly assume disabled people mean when they say they are at their limit.

This is "the car has stopped moving, and to move it I'd have to break my body pushing it." This is "at a certain point, people will hit a wall in terms of money and time and energy, and any energy spent after that comes directly out of their life force."

So the argument "okay but just spend a little more time money and energy actually" is not a valid one.

And the argument "if you are not able to do this specific task, then it means you're not doing anything else to make the world a better place" doesn't exactly impress me either. You said yourself that it is impossible to be a perfectly ethical consumer for most people.

How do you know what else people are doing to resist oppression? How many hours per week until your standards are met?What if someone works 3 jobs? Does that mean it's harder to be a good person if you're poor?? Why do you get to decide what specific avenue of bettering the world is the most morally repugnant or acceptable? What kind of proof of goodness and effort would make you satisfied enough to lay off on the shame?? Who are you helping??

Clothing is a fundamental human need, and some of us have to buy cheap fucking clothes quickly. Billionaires are buying their seventh yacht this month. The people who own fast fashion companies are abusing their workers and putting local affordable clothing stores out of business - and this applies for basically every company with price points that low because governments are failing to regulate corporations to enforce basic human rights.

I have $300 to spend on a new wardrobe as my old clothes have fallen apart or become too small. Do you have a way for me to get a new winter coat, 3 flannels, 10 shirts, 3 dress shirts, new sandals, 10 pairs of pants, 5 bras, 12 pairs of socks, and 10 pairs of underwear within that budget and also definitely 100% ethically sourced, with free returns in case it doesn't fit? Or will I simply have to use the cheap stores?

I have about an hour to spend on this per week. Many mainstream stores doesn't make clothes in my size, and I am now in *year 5* of needing an electric wheelchair and being unable to get one; plus I live up a flight of stairs, so I can't even bring my walker out with me - so thrift shopping is not gonna cover this. Should I continue to wear small and tattered clothing until I have the time, money, and energy to meet your standards?

Did you know there are more empty homes in this country than homeless people? If I decide to splurge on only 100% ethically-produced products, and I can't make rent, and I become homeless, are YOU going to be there for me?? Or are you too busy litigating the endless tiny shames of poverty in your own community?

So I ask you again, are you SURE this is where you want to direct your punk energy?

Because there are a whole lot of rich people relying on people like us punching down and to the side instead of looking up to see where the money is going.

Because energy and time, as it turns out, are limited resources. And I would never expect you to secretly have more than you claim to have.