#but i have Not been feeling good abt my art lately (well. less the art than the fact that I'm getting more self conscious of the response?-

[welcometogrouchland]

Okay I think I'm mature enough to admit. That I am getting withdrawal from the owl show. And that I miss her so bad it's not even funny anymore

[be-good-to-bugs]

once again debating trying out another program

[sugar-omi]

I came here to ask for Rockstar! Cove rambles and saw the Rockstar! Baxter art you reblogged omfg it's so good.

Please can we get some of your Rockstar! Cove (and/or Baxter if you feel like it) rambles 🙏

(Hope your holiday has been great 💖)

this is more. rockstar!cove backstory but YKW ITS FINE BC ITS BEEN WHATS ON MY MIND LATELY we'll have to talk abt him again bc this post was getting LONG especially w baxterrr

tags : SFW, headcanons, step 2-4, rockstar au, so ooc, bullying mentioned, fighting, baxter's tags are below before his hc's

listen....

im ngl. i want him to be maybe a little toxic. a lil crazy.

or into things he's not canonically into/does often

at least he's rough n impulsive at first

whenever he can get away with it, and before he got famous, he loves taking a long ride on his motorcycle

compared to when he was a young teen, he tries not to take drives when he's angry

bc when he was young, he'd put on some music and blast it as loud as it could go, and he'd drive and drive and drive...

ended up with a few warnings and speeding tickets that way because he'd get lost in riding n his thoughts n the music

but now that his life isn't so turbulent, he doesn't do that anymore

i wanna imagine he doesn't grow up with you next door n you didn't know each other until junior year of high school

he sees you n he's sold...

thinks you're so fucking beautiful/handsome and he sees you laughing n smiling w your friends n he's so, so whipped for you

he's still a sweet shy boy, so it takes forever for him to talk to you

n it's terry who introduced you two!!!

he's all flustered, bc you're even more lovely up close

n if you're all bubbly n extroverted, he thinks you're like sunshine

if you're more reserved, he thinks you're very cool or that it's amazing how calm you are all the time

if you're shy/easily flustered, will sometimes (and now that he's grown, always) mention out loud he thinks it's cute when you blush...

either way, just loves your personality n thinks you're amazing n cute

you actually calm him down. you ground him.

he used to get into fights kinda often.

i like to think rockstar!cove got like this bc his parents stayed together longer than they did, n there was no brilliant neighbor to reach out to him

he n his dad were still like oil n water, and the kids at school were less than friendly but usually didn't dare fuck with him

key word is usually.

just had a thought actually... cliff's family living nearby

not his parents. he moved as far as he could

and with him n Kyra on the brink of divorce, her moving out the house, n all cliff has to do to keep them afloat..

he didn't think his equally shitty cousins would be a problem.

but surprise!! they're a few doors down n too happy to "catch up"

cove n cliff avoid them pretty well, n cliff really didn't need to tell cove to avoid his cousins bc he was already 2 steps ahead of him

but his cousins dont get that message, they also think its a good idea to pick on cove...

so between the short patience of most hormonal 13 year olds, his parents (finally) separating, cove's intolerance for bullshit....

cove ends up rocking his 2 cousins shit when they snatch his glasses off his face, bending the frame

ignores his cousins mom yelling at him n cliff to apologize for hurting her kids. feels a bit warm when his dad tells her his son is more well mannered than both her kiss combined, even laughs when he says a rabid raccon has more sense n poise

but is even happier when his dad, after a moment of silence in the car, asks him if be used the right hook he taught him

n tries to hide his smile when his dad ruffles his hair n goes "that's good. good job son."

he does hear the whole, "violence isn't always the answer" and "pick your battles" thing

but he shrugs off the lecture when he and cliff have a tub of ice cream each n cliff holds a bag of peas to his face

anyway.

he fights like a DOG. he arGRHHH HE HAS EVERYTHIGN TAKEN CARE OF. TRUST.

professional at sneaking out n sneaking YOU out

cove at 4am: wanna get mcd's?

dont even bother saying no bc he's already outside

dont pretend to be sleep either bc he FUCKING SEES YOU.

will leave you alone if you genuinely don't wanna fuck around in the middle of the night, but how can you say no to him?

ah. before i forget

Will kiss you if you're bandaging his face

asks you to ice his bruises...

SINGS YOU SONGS N SHIT

kryptonite. creep. p!nk and lady gaga PERIOD. all of it

serenades you with his guitar and/or voice

sometimes he's just fiddling with the strings, switching between cheery beats and trying to rick roll you but the beat is wayyy off

loves when you fall asleep to his music too, plays the sleepiest tune he can think of

you being his biggest supporter is what makes him fight to make a name in the music industry

after supporting him in his personal life, through all his lows and highs, then supporting his music that he was too scared to go for

he puts his best foot forward for his sake and yours

+ TAGS: mention of FWB, toxic baxter <3, so ooc ofc, mm implied partying/drinking

now rockstar baxter....

i want him to be a problem. he's the toxic one here

compared to cove, who is soft n sweet but impulsive and always willing to fight, rough but well meaning...

baxter is your situationship

your friends with benefits

friends if a loose word, since you hardly ever talk since you've met and unless arguing, bickering, or sexting counts as getting to know each other...

than you're best friends!!!

he's the big headed musician who always asks "wyd" and "u up?" whenever he's in town

at least he sends you money to doll up or eat, or whatever before he gets in town

"make sure you eat before i come. bc im not letting you go once i get there"

so.... if you want commitment. he's not it...

just saw *this tweet, and rockstar!baxter IS the type to email you after you block him

omfg. if any of yall have read armin x reader fanfics... yk how he is in those fics? all toxic n shit?

thats baxter.

not THAT bad. like baby trapping bad or cheating on you, manipulating you etc.

but he's bad

definitely the dumb choice you make at 18-20 smth years old n once you mature, you drop him because he doesn't grow up quickly...

he won't even have the realization that you're the one until he's MINIMUM 37-40+ YEARS OLD. AND FLYS UP FROM THE BED LIKE HE'S SEEN A GHOST

curses n curses himself to high hell and low heaven

now depending on how bad he's fucked you over, or you've moved on, etc... he understands if you don't wanna try being together, bc he was a fucking mess

at least, if he sees you catching feelings or himself, he does break it off

but there's still good times between you!!

he sends you things for your birthday

and when he's not on tour showing his ass, he comes to spend it with you

is very happy if you come to spend his birthday with him!!!

starts to look forward to it, but he doesn't really show it

although after the first time, he can't help crying, thought the first time was just a one off thing

unless you make the first one a big thing, than he cries then

even if all you did was get/make a cake and decorate your small apartment, he's so so happy

mm i started thinking abt smth

i don't think he's that bad, impulsive, etc. before his career

before, he's pursuing music because his parents hate it. its "not a useful career" and "embarrassing"

but then he starts to love it, its an outlet for him and then it's become a passion

but once he gets a deal with a record label, it's just a downward spiral

puts everything into music, ignores everything else and doesn't take breaks like he should

i think what breaks your "relationship" is him getting caught up in the darker side of the music industry, and losing himself.

he doesn't laugh or anything like before

doesn't make random trips to see you anymore

in fact, probably ends up flaking on you or suddenly canceling, or going weeks without talking to you

its rough. and you two definitely need time apart for him to grow and realize that this is serving anyone besides the companies pockets well

[meruz]

hi im putting all my asks in one post again. these are from like the past month and a half approx? some digimon thoughts some tmnt thoughts some art musings u know the usual

@waywardistics YAYY thank you so much for ordering! I'm glad it got to you & that you are enjoying it!

this is kind of a missive to everyone who ordered but: I am very nervous about pre-orders whenever I do them... nervous that not very many people will order, nervous that there will be supply chain or production dilemmas and I won't be able to get copies out to people in a timely fashion, nervous about having people's money but having an indeterminate amt of time where i have not yet "held up my part of the bargain" etc etc SO. THANK U GUYS...FOR ORDERING and being patient and im so glad it got to y'all

@seanonthemoon (idk why i cant tag u BUT) interesting... i gotta be honest I don't think abt the crests that much. i agree that they're very much like heres the "girl" crest heres the "nerd boy" crest etc to the point that it becomes almost meaningless. but i think what makes them even more meaningless to me, and is probably the reason they kind of designated girl/boy crests etc is that i think like the digivices they're toys and merchandise more than they are actual narrative tools LOL. I wouldve loved something with cody and mimi! theyre both so deeply empathetic and sensitive.. theres a lot they share but i think because they look so different on the surface it would make it difficult to market that merch...booo capitalism boooo toy marketing its all sexist bullshit at least here in the u.s. idk if japan is that different though.

I'm actually a little frustrated with how often 02 and 02 related media squanders cody in general lol. he feels like a parallel of izzy, joe, and TK(season 1 tk) while also being kind of none of those and suffering through lackluster characterization as a result... and then once ken joins the team it feels a little redundant. there's a couple cody-centric eps of 02 I remember really liking but then i think abt how he's been used since in like post-series content and 02:the beginning where they made him type on the computer even though obviously that's yoleis thing but because he had nothing else to do and aghh... my blood boils. i feel like the youngest but most serious anime achetype even at its bare bones is actually rly interesting idk why they don't play it up. UM. Once again my opinion is that he should be taller LOL and maybe they should play up his kendo martial arts honorable training stuff more idk. tallest + youngest + most serious just seems like a recipe for success for me. well. theres still time. and theres always fanfic.

THIS IS SO NICE TO SAY and not the first time someone has said it but i appreciate it everytime because i really admire the mm art style so much. It's like part of why I got really into the movie because I really recognized my own artistic sensibilities and aspirations in the way they stylized everything.

UM And i feel like since watching the movie and looking at all the concept art and making my own art i do feel like its only become more obvious how much my own art is lacking LOL LIKE when you see something that feels so similar I think the differences only become more stark. those artists are definitely on a different level than me. But it's nice to hear people say it doesn't look so different from their pov. thank u ^^

thank u!!!!!!! i love mundanity and naturalism... there's something so beautiful abt it to me lol... I feel like my anatomy needs work actually but ive been feeling better abt it this year so it's good to hear! thank you!

DLKGDSGDLALSNDF WAS IT TOO FAR..?? firstly, yeah I was thinking late teen/young adult ages for both of them ie 18-19ish, definitely not the age the kids are in the movie lol.

but also they arent DOING anything in that pic it is literally just a confrontation + some innuendo... I think teens should be allowed some less than subtle innuendo.. its like one of the top 3 classically teen pastimes...

this is such a funny ask to get because i feel like i haven't been able to do thin lineart until like. this past year or two maybe LOL. UM having a line-centric art job helped I think. I started on craig of the creek back in 2022 and thats a show where we spend a lot of time inking so I had a job where I was constantly moderating my line weight 40 hours a week every week for over a year. disappointingly, much of improvement is simply horrendous amounts of practice.

Here's a tip though: I think a lot of thin lineart boils down to confidence. I think instinctively we read thick, bold, fast lines as confident but theres actually a lot of obscuring you can do with a thick line. if you're not sure whether the nose on the face or a browline should be a little more left or a little more down you can hide that with a thick line and pretend its a shadow. or hide it with a bunch of quick lines and the eye can kind of approximate where looks best among the mass.. whereas a thin line is rly singular and stark and hides nothing, it needs to be precise. so anytime i know i want thin lineart i spend a LOT of time sketching, making sure i know exactly where i want my lines to go. so im not second guessing by the time im inking...

ok thats kind of a broad tip lol... here's one thats more applicable: IF POSSIBLE, lower your pressure sensitivity on your device. most devices have some way to edit your pressure sensitivity curve. I use a surface pro at home and this is what my pressure curve looks like most of the time.

When I work on a wacom it looks even more like a reverse L shape LOL. I'm naturally a really heavy-handed artist and I use a "light" or "hard" pressure curve to compensate for how hard I'm always pressing on the pen lol. if you're like me and you struggle with going too hard with the ink too fast... this will probably help a lot!

SFHASLDFH I LOVE THIS ASK this is like the type of question a person gets asked when chalk drawing on the sidewalk at recess LOL. but i understand because I've been struggling also for like. months. I think I'm finally starting to nail it down though so here's some of my observations.

[feel free to save this img but **please do not re-post it or share broadly**. my biggest fear in the world is to spend 30 min on some notes and become a widely proliferated art tutorial im not even kidding. i made it low contrast and difficult to read on purpose.]

my other tip is to just look at and study a lot of reference because that's all ive been doing. the tmnt are really cartoony so its difficult to use like actual anatomical reference unless ur going for that look BUT theres been so many adaptions in so many different styles that there's a real treasure trove of stuff to look at for how to simplify, stylize, and dissect these characters while keeping the recognizable essence. so theres lots to pull from.

If you want to expand further, it's also good to have 5) something sci-fi 6)something fantasy 7)something mundane/slice of life. a bedroom is a really good go-to. And of course some bgs can be two or more of these things at once.

I've definitely answered asks abt bg tips before but here's one specifically for if you want to do bg design for a job:

Your portfolio should probably have at least one of each of the following 1) an interior 2) an exterior 3) a cityscape 4) a nature scene. Just to cover kind of the basics of what you'd be asked to draw on any given project.

I actually feel like I don't have that many cityscrapes in my portfolio... this is something I'm gonna try to work on in the coming year LOL. OH ALSO. This is a very basic tip and people will tell you it all the time but its worth repeating: look up portfolio websites of artists who have the job you want. An easy way to do this is to go onto imdb for any cartoon or movie you like and to find the names listed as "bg/background designer" or whatever then just google that name +"art" or "animation" most artists have some public facing internet presence so it's not hard. spend time studying their work and hold those images in your head! it's a good way to get a good idea of what "industry standard" looks like and comparing ur own art to it... I know people sometimes get bummed comparing their art to others but if you can keep your head up lol.. it'll help you figure out what you need to work on!

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ok thats all i have to say sorry for typing so much. happy new year everybody who read this far LMAO!!!!!

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

Well about the perception of Volo vs Kamado thing, and why more people don’t hate Volo, I have my own reflections (pretty privilege is absolutely a factor tho let’s be real 😂)

Everyone growing up has at least one story of an adult being super unfair to you, even though you were doing everything right. Their own biases and experiences could be understood later once you were older and calmer reflecting back on the incident, like a teacher who snapped at you maybe had a super long day of wrangling hundreds of children. But we never forget how it feels in that moment to have those who should be guiding us be unfair and seemingly unreasonable. So naturally that’s gonna hurt when you get kamado being paranoid.

Volo on the other hand is just absolutely delightful I’m sorry maybe if Kamado put on a silly outfit and hair for his boss battle instead of plate mail he’d have more art. Like you said Volos betrayal is one and done really, he acts like a theater kid and then dips. You have to keep seeing kamado being in charge in the game after his blunders for a while which can rub people the wrong way. (Also this is maybe just me but I never trusted Volo just like I never trusted Cynthia as a kid, and finding out he was evil was a great moment of vindication I CANT be the only one who experienced this)

TLDR we see unfairness way more than we see someone betray us while making their hair like a god horse

well, you heard them, kamado. time to go get the jester outfit. cmon chop chop it's to redeem your image

yeah, the point abt getting burned by adults in authority is also very fair. most of us were not scarred for life by theater kid antics lol. the other thing abt it is that often those same adults never really face any consequences. you were always just expected to move on, suck it up etc. cause that's life as a kid right. sometimes ppl will use their power over you just to flex their limited authority, or to vent whatever's going on in their home life, and this doesn't really stop when you grow up it's just that when you're a kid basically every adult has that authority position. so it's just expected that there's nothing you can do. i mean unless you decide to be the karmic force of justice in your own life by being the most stubborn bitch of a child to walk the earth. not that i would know anything about that cough

uh anyway. the thing is the thing btwn you and kamado isn't about about child vs adult. you're more or less considered an adult yourself by jubilife, albeit a rather young and more importantly low ranking one. like we've said (a million times already lol) kamado's not doing it just to grasp at a sense of control, he's reacting to what he perceives as a very real threat to his village (and also because the writers clocked him in the face with the idiot ball for plot advancement reasons lbr).

and the thing is kamado DOES, kind of, face consequences and own up to his mistakes by the end of the game. also after the red sky event he's like, REALLY nice to you lol. not just briefly either! imo you can tell that he sincerely respects you and regrets his actions in the red sky. go look at his late game quotes-

"Perhaps you are a divine being yourself, sent to bring us gifts from above... "I know I've no right to say this... But we are truly fortunate to have been able to count you among the Survey Corps' ranks. If you had not joined us, we would have fallen on Mount Coronet. We would have lost our home. We would have lost our future." "I'm grateful to you for showing me what a heartening presence Pokémon can be. We must spar again sometime!" "<player>, forgive me for taking so much of your time [telling you about the Galaxy name.] Please accept this as a sort of apology."

like he's trying to make up for the way they were treated earlier and give them the proper treatment they're owed for all their help.

idk i don't have a good way to conclude this i guess. i just think he's a cool character

[mykatzone]

Answering asks #3

I got some wonderful asks recently and finally go around to answering them :D!

@sweetstrawberrytea This makes me really happy :'D it's so rare to see Kuroshitsuji fans who are also Umineko fans! We gotta do something and create more overlap fr fr (doing my part with my silly crossover arts XD) In any case thank you so much <33

@aeowolfestheater Thank you :'D I resonate with your comic struggles ;w; while yes I have drawn pages of my comic many times (entire chapters too), I'm stuck in this reboot hell, where I am never satisfied with what I make so I keep redoing it... over... and over again... SO I GET U!!! But it's ok! We have so much time to do our comics and other passion projects, I really wouldn't stress over doing it asap! It's ok to take things slowly and not rush into it (trust me ik)!

Thank you also for liking my Grelle art <33 Always happy to hear that!!

You mention you wanna see all of my art, idk how serious that is, but I do have a lot more art, just not on this account. I usually go by Katrinci online, so you can find a lot of my older art searching that username! Some of it is kinda embarressing, a lot of it is art I did as a kid and I cringe. But ykno! If you wanna look for more there u go!

In any case feel free to use my art as references or for studying if you want!!! I don't mind at all, you can even trace it for practice (though please don't post any traced art if you do). In any case thank you for this sweet message !!! :'D

@shadowalkingschemer AAA this is so cool to hear!!! I assume you haven't played Umineko and just watched the animatic/song because it interested you after watching my Grelle amv? That's actually so cool you have no idea :'D

To answer your question- I haven't thought about it! Mostly because Kuroshitsuji actually does have an official series of musicals, so I didn't think my contribution was necessery? But... I kinda wanna do it know... I'm not sure which songs I would use but I wanna do it...

Thank you for inspiring me XD I'll ponder about this!

@melodyofthevoid HI!! It's been awhile Melody :D Omg how did you come across my blog? Through my (occasional) Invader Zim drawings on this blog or? 👀

In any case I've been mostly good! Kinda directionless atm honestly. That's why I started a Tumblr again! It's good to have a space where I can just draw fanart and have fun without stressing abt online art career stuff lfkghfds. It's a chill relaxation area here!

Anyhow thank you so much :') I hope you've been well too!!! Sorry for the late reply btw! I answer my asks in a batch, I hope u don't mind!

Wishing you all the best <3!!

Aww thank you for thinking I'm cool anon! But sadly I have to decline! I only befriend people online veeery occassionally after being mutuals with them for at least a month or few (and even then that's not guaranteed). I worry about befriending people who already know me, but I don't know them at all ;_; it's too parasocial for me sorry!

I am so sorry anon... I may have given you a false impression of what Black Butler is about... It is sadly not about the cool red haired lady... She's actually barely in it... And the show does not treat her with respect usually... I'm so sorry for the false advertisement pls forgive me </3

Sure thing anon!

These are all the ones I have saved on my computer!!

@zoeyfoster-blog Omg I'm extremely biased, but I would say yes. For one, GX is a comedic masterpiece especially if you watch the dub. Yes the dub takes itself way less seriously and changes a lot of stuff from the canon japanese version BUT. It's so funny. It's so so so funny. Other then that I mean, GX is just a fun show with fun characters. I love the characters dearly (Chazz it up for life), but it's not like. The most brilliant piece of media out there. It's a pretty standard show for kids really. Though it get's really angsty and dark in seasons 3-4. Idk I really love it personally. If I were you, I'd watch s1, maybe early season 2 dubbed, because those parts of the show are a lot more silly and watching them dubbed would make it more funny/enjoyable. But def switch to sub on the more serious episodes like those in s3. Also thank you for liking my art :'D!!

@anawkwardlady Whenever we talk and are totally normal about Higurashi characters years are added to my lifespan <3

I actually haven't heard of it before! Thank you for the song rec!! I listened to it and yeah.. yeah heavy Natsuhi vibes.

Speaking of Umineko-esq Mitski songs, I think Me and My Husband is a very Sayo coded song? I actually thought about making an animatic of that song with her...

Anyhow thank you for sharing this thoiught!!

Thank you so much anon!!! And hang it there! You are getting your own post where I draw Finny and explain my art process while drawing it! I will do it as soon as possible, please be patient :'D!!

[electrificata]

Here is what i have been listening 2 lately yes im avoiding something no i dont listen to a lot of """new""" music

"This corrosion" the sisters of mercy - nothing revolutionary here, its a goth (sorry eldritch) classic with the big stupid jim steinman bombast that i love. If you want a good time search "andrew eldritch interview" on youtube, he's a huge bitch its so funny

"My lady of mercy" the last dinner party - a cute fizzy indie pop song that splits open into huge, triumphant stoner rock choruses. Its my understanding this band has weathered "industry plant" rumors despite being like, not. Anyway if industry plants made shit like this id be ok w the concept

"Kybalion" killah priest - my friend sold this wu tang associate to me by saying a) he's into the occult, b) not sure if he's actually any good, c) hes making animal noises on the new album. "Hermes trismegestis of lyrics that specialize in physics and pyramids" literally what else do i have to tell you

"Blood makes noise" suzanne vega - i love when a singer songwriter chick has one hard track on her album and this one sounds urgent and clanging and ominous im having a great time

"You aint no celebrity" jungle - everybodys losing their shit over "back on 74," and rightfully so, but this is the ass shaker on the album, its like an update on all those 2000s sean paul hits i liked before i heard at too many bar mitzvahs (it actually knicks the buzzing theremin from "get busy," which was always better than "temperature")

"Naked eye" luscious jackson - 90s crunchy touchy feely divine feminine radical vulnerability nonsense

"Come together" primal scream - these guys were kind of narrowly revolutionary in the 90s and i dont hear anybody under 40 talk abt them ever but i loooove the early 90s uk "what if classic rock was dance" shit that was happening with them and i guess kind of madchester?

"Obsession" animotion - this is the loud obnoxious goofy 80s pop hit all the other ones want to be. The boy-girl vocals are really fun BONUS the singers fell in love and are still married, go look up a recent performance of this song theyre so old and so horny for each other i love it

"The big sky" kate bush + "chains of love" erasure - two very different 80s pop classics, but i listen to them the same way, and frequently right after each other. I have a theory of art and fiction i call, for the moment, "mythological awareness." I use this to refer to work that knows what old folkloric/mythological/archetypal symbols and narratives and images it evokes. Work that knows that any love story is every love story, every mad scientist is a wizard and a shaman and a hacker as well. Kate is singing about the things we pay attention to as children and forget as adults, the sky is a marvel its easy to forget about because its there every day, but that doeant mean its any less a marvel. This might be the most straightforward u2-ish rock single bush ever put out, but it feels like shes marching at the head of an army of zeppelins and airplanes and rockets powered by the laughter of gods. Andy bell of erasure is singing about a fictionalized pre-aids era of gay utopia like its something that used to be real and can be real again if we all clap our hands. He details a world of "sisters and brothers" open to the pleasures of the world, fucking and loving and worrying about what theyll do for dinner rather than whether they can get into the hospital to watch their loved ones die. And over an unstoppable synthesizer bounce, falsetto floating over clouds of gospel-inflected backing vocals, you believe him. He could be talking about atlantis or hobbitton or erewhon or the greek age of heroes and he knows that, the halcyon past is a myth none of us can get away from, maybe we need to understand it and use it rather than disavow it. I was born years after both of these songs hit, and my parents didnt listen to either of these artists, so they come to me fresh and bright and veiled in the light obscuring mist of morning, for me and no one else (everyone else)

[sleevesareforlosers]

DISCUSSION GROUP!!!!

i’m looking forward to having some more free time at some point 😭 hopefully i’ll have more time to do sewing and stuff i haven’t gotten to in ages 🤞 & i’m really gonna try and continue my mandatory happiness mindset!!! (<- read abt it in laura jane grace’s book it’s like. maybe everything sucks but u can often choose to look at things in a positive light it’s really really helped me!! like. i can go into things w a positive mindset instead of a miserable one and control that at least yk?)

i’m currently out of town & it’s around the 30s. not bad wish it was snowing but i’ll take what i can get, i can wear my $10 80s windbreaker which i’m happy about!! and if i could be anywhere i’d want to be somewhere with snow but honestly? i’m quite content where i am i love doing big family christmas together.

and. i will be honest as much as i try to seek out new stuff to read/watch/listen to. i love rewatching &c. it’s rly nice and comfortable yk? i’m restarting how to train your dragon actually which is. so lovely <3 and i just did my semiannual big hero 6 watch which was delightful

uno reverse!!!! hope ur doing wonderfully :)

!!!!! fingers crossed for more free time! i've been doin a lot of sewing recently and i forgot how NICE it is so im rlly manifesting you get some more time w ur arts too! and YES thats a good thing to bring w you! i love ljg thats a rlly good philosophy. i should read her book huh

oh thats so fun! not bad weather and ALWAYS a bonus to be wearing a nice windbreaker. im glad ur havin fun doing family + xmas stuff! its one of my fave holidays for like exactly that reason

also okay SO fair of you. i feel like im rlly the same except im not even consistent w my rewatches lol. i SHOULD watch httyd again though. i never watched the third one but ik a lot of my friends rlly liked it

also i AM doing wonderfully thank you!!! for the uno reverse:

im lookin forward to getting cracking on a real job search again in the new year (not gonna start too far out from my current contract ending) and also my boyfriend is gonna come up here again at the end of january so thats like. SUPER exciting. and i think im gonna try and bring forward just like. idk i guess just trying to work on my communication and stuff ive def been working on that lately and i want to keep doing so!

it is currently cold as balls here (-11) and sunny today but its been snowing the last few days so we got like. two feet of snow. which i DO LIKE. i love snow even if its a little functionally irritating. idk where i would be if i could be anywhere rn. itd be nice to see my halifax friends again but itd also be nice to be [where my boyfriend lives] so. yknow. hard choice

and i think it kinda varies actually! im def better at reconsuming whatever media kind but i think i reread books a LOT less often and i try to do the same w movies. but i hardly EVER listen to new music and shows r id say a 50/50? i started derry girls today tho its fantastic

hope you're doing well too matt!!!

[marshiestars]

Tag 9 People You Want To Get To Know Better

thank you @scrawnytreedemon for tagging!! let’s begin, shall we? :3c

Three Ships: ughhhhh this is real hard because I JUST invented the most horrible, wonderful “why does it work” crackship a few weeks ago, but if I want to include it, I have to ignore one of my three big zelda ships :C

1. Ghiralink. because of course. I feel like it’s illegal to leave this one out or put it any lower. it’s the good food. it’s well-established. I can afford to be picky with my content. it’s great :D

2. Astlink! sorry Kohlink, but Astlink is less likely to scare half my audience away 😔.

tbh I’m still VERY surprised that Astor and Link aren’t paired together nearly as often as Zelast (Astor / Zelda). don’t get me wrong, both are rare pairs, but somehow Astlink is even *rarer* shksjhdjhsshs, and I can’t for the life of me figure out why. either way, it's 'moody goth bitch rejected by society (or maybe he rejected society first, it's a chicken or egg situation tbh) with the perfect golden person that everyone admires who secretly has their own issues'!! and it's about how they're on the complete opposite sides of this huge conflict and yet they find unexpected parallels in each other! and having everything fall apart but deciding to be a better person, even when the rest of the world says it's too late, because that one person believes in you and is willing to give you a chance! darkness and light! it's GOOD FOOD

(...man, I really gotta finish chapter 3 of swordsman and the seer.)

3. ...fuck it. scrawny, I hereby challenge you for the title of Weirdest Fucking Crossover Ship. Ghirahim x Godrick? Sephiroth x the Hollow Knight? I'm intrigued, but not crumbling to ash at the thought.

and so I give you this in place of gushing about Kohlink, which is unbelievably rare, but damn it, at least they're from the same source material! besides, I wasn't the first person to pair them by a long shot, no, no, no.

but there’s a special, lonely sort of pride in knowing you’re probably the first of 8 billion people in the world to ever even think of a pairing. ready? here it is:

R*x D*ng*rv*st x S*np*i from FNF.

(censored their names like that because if this shows up in the tags I’m gonna jump out a window)

yeah, man. I don't even know either.

I mean, I do know, somewhere, and my original train of thought is buried in the memory slush of a few months ago, gone forever. so now we're here. fuck. kill me. why am I writing shit for these two. girl what the hell is this

everyone who reads this post, I want a brick emoji in my inbox to simulate getting one through my window

First Ever Ship: ANYWAY, fuck, I don’t even remember at this point, I've been in greater fandom for so long. wait... oh, son of a bitch, nevermind, I do.

*sigh*

it was Billdip.

DO NOT COME AFTER ME, I DON’T SHIP IT ANYMORE. haven’t for years. I was 12. but I loved Bill Cipher (still do, he's my funny meow meow blorbo <3) and was very upset when the finale happened even though I knew that was how it had to be. but every time Billdip art came across my screen, I saw cool art where he: # 1. was still around and # 2. was more often than not a pretty human / humanoid (this was at the height of his sexymanification). hell, I didn't even give a shit about Dipper honestly, I just wanted more Bill content. and again, being literally 12, I didn’t really stop to think abt any moral implications. but yeah.

(also nowadays I hc Bill as ace sooo)

Last Song: 'She Had The World' by Panic! very nice to sing to, it's right in my range <3

Last Movie: does ‘My Little Pony: A Very Minty Christmas’ count? it’s a childhood film and practically tradition for me to watch it every year for christmas lol. although this year I’ve been replaying it for... research purposes. yeah. totally not for a lethally cursed fanfic, no sir.

if that doesn’t count, then ‘The Lego Movie’!

Currently Reading: nothing atm!! even as my 'to read' pile gets taller by the day, hhhh

Currently Watching: Minty Christmas, again, but definitely not so I can copy the dialogue verbatim to use as the base for a coked-up christmas crack fic

Currently Consuming: soup <3

Currently Craving: instant ramen, good god, especially if it’s spicy. they have cups for sale in vending machines around campus but they’re all beef and chicken flavour :C

I won't tag anyone else in this because nine people is a lot; far too many to bother with this wall of personal nonsense shdhdj but thanks anyway for tagging me scrawny, my beloved mutual!!! <3

[autiacorart]

Hi there! I just wanted to tell you I totally ADORE your artstyle! And the fact that you draw Wesper stuff now is absolutely *chefs kiss* <333

(also saw your post abt comparing yourself to artist and well I feel that too, would be lying if I hadn't been looking at your art and going ahh I wish mine was pretty like that too, but I'm also fine with what I do as long as it makes me happy I guess + also printed some of my art recently too, just less professionally and it is indeed very good for the soul!)

This wasn't meant to be so long sry ^^''

I don't even know what to answer to that because sjhsjhdjj that's so cute of you!! ;_; I went into six of crows hell thanks to my friend and now i love all the couples and the world of the series, i feel so inspired to draw them all and write fics ;_;

comparing ourselves is awful and tbh we shouldn't even do it because we all have our completely different styles and ways to draw but it's just SO HARD to stop. sometimes i just wanna stop drawing bc of it and it's so unhealthy. we should all support each other in our art journeys. also, as you said, art first of all should be FUN. and ngl drawing crows lately gave me a lot of fun!

i work in printing studio so it's just easy for me to print my stuff but i haven't had this option for long so i'm just grateful i'm in this place now. holding your art physically hits different!

thank you for reaching out to me and supporting my art! i really appreciate it

[zeldasnotes]

hii !!

so this is my review for the birth chart reading: first of all, thank you very much !! you sent it in less than a week so i'm very thankful. hehe. ALSO, i woud like to say your explanation abt me and my father's relationship were true. there's some distance there before, but i'm trying to be closer to him now and i think it's going well !! i also have a tendency to view myself as the victim, but i'm consciously trying to do something about this cause it doesn't have any positive effect on me and also to other people ://

i was also pleasantly surprised about the mentioning of me becoming known for my work in another country??? it's so weird bc i never saw myself working abroad before, but lately, i have been thinking of actually working abroad (hopefully, in the entertainment field) and am feeling really excited and positive about it.

your explanation for my mercury placement also fits !! I OVERTHINK A LOOOT, i swear it's gonna be the death of me 😭 i also think i'm smart with interpersonal relationships however i am someone frank so i say things as they are even if that's not what other people want to hear hehe

despite being a 7th house stellium, i don't see myself as someone who prefers to be in a relationship bc honestly i've never been in one yet 😩 HOWEVER, i think abt having a partner a lot. lol. i'm also big on having my alone time, it that gets compromised it could actually lead to a fight. lots of people also tell me i'm friendly and kind but i honestly don't see it????

MY MARS PLACEMENT EXPLANATION WAS ALSO ON POINT. i have a huuuge attraction to people who are bold and confident (however, i lile them better when they also have this aura of being cold/snob haha) and i actually don't know how to flirt so i guess my sun placement really downplayed it a lot HAHAHA. and omg, i get and lose interest in people really fast 😭

i've also noticed that even if i just stay quiet or in the side, i always get noticed. sometimes, i really don't like it bcs i feel like other people see me as someone who's hungry for attention even if i really try to swerve away from it !! sometimes it gives me an ego boost bcs of how interested ppl are with me. i also noticed i have this "sunny" look but i don't really like my bone structure (idk maybe these are my insecurities talking). ://

as for my midheaven, some people say i have good style but unless i become stable in life, that's when i can only afford the kind of fashion style i want <33 I ALSO AM SOMEONE WHO NEEDS SECURITY IN MY LIFE!! i swear i'm so used to entering situation with plans b-z backed up. lol. i'd also like to believe i am hard-working, it can get too much that i become too much of a workaholic 😭

also for my jupiter and saturn explanation, i actually feel like i did face lots of struggles in school. it's like for every good thing i experience, a bad thing should happen next???

okay my uranus explanation definitely called me out 😭 my mom actually once told me my type and the people i end up crushing on are totally different.

my neptune placement also makes it really hard for me to stick to a routine. i hate sticking to one actually. but i'm trying to change that now but yeah, it's still hard :// I ALSO HAVE DIFFICULTY STAYING ORGANIZED so i have to double my efforts on this one 😩✊

my mom also has a really big effect on me, mostly for positive reasons !! i mean we had our fights, HUGE ones, but thankfully my mom's always open to changing for the better. i also am, if i'm the one at fault.

dang. my chiron explanation is also true. i'm hugely insecure about my creativity and art 🥲 YET it's not as bad as it was before but i still have my moments !!

as for the asteroids used, i find it so werid and funny that most of my placements suggest i'm a highly sexual person but i honestly have a hard time being intimate with other people :// it's like i freeze on the spot and don't know what to do?? HAHAHA.

anyway, that's all. thank you for the reading again 🥰

Thank you so so much for taking your time to give me this review I really appreciate it!!🥰❤️

[levmada]

in good faith of keeping u guys updated on my tattoos...

i moved recently + my old shop closed SO i went to a new one and i was too nervous of being judged to book my levi tattoo this time + partly bc of covid i havent gotten a tattoo in a year so i decided to go with one(s) i already had planned

heres the results!!

tw// some healed scars and a little blood

i decided to get 2 pieces done on my wrists

this lamb?? a breeze. i love it very much

THE CROW!!???? idk if u see (/s) but my skin here is VERY angry and prior to these tattoos i have never bled while getting one (the lamb bled too, but just a little).

as a whole i severely underestimated the toll these would take and completely disregarded proper prep (eating before, sleeping well, bringing WATER) and even tho my artist gave me a couple smoke breaks, by the end of the crow i was more or less going into shock, aka cold sweats, dizziness, ears ringing

it wasnt my artists fault and he was super nice!! someone else bought me orange juice and water and waited till i was ready to keep going. im normally v v good abt the pain, but Man.

what was bad on my artist was he waited until the day of to finish my designs. the shop itself played this old loud grunge music - which i enjoyed a lot but became overwhelming after a couple hours with the pain.

afterwards: i went home, passed the fuck out and woke up feeling achy with a fever. i literally took an at home covid test but little did i know that i had tattoo fever (never had that before either).

ur body/mind WILL treat the tattoo process as trauma and treat it as an injury. i am still (~a week later) a little sore lol. the toll it takes will sometimes make u sick for a day or two, which i was. after more sleep and some fever reducers i was all better and i fucking loved my new art.

then i took off the bandages. in the past my artist had always used a kind of saran wrap, but these were proper breathable adhesive bandages. i didnt take them off properly also my artist didnt tell me so as a result ive been dealing with peeling off this VERY sticky residue b/n regular cleanings and lotion to deal with the itching while they heal

heres a pic i took today:

so

I LOVE THEM I LOVE THEM SM !!! theyve healed rly well, even the raven which i was most worried abt. it's still a process but im happy and im planning to schedule my aot tattoo soon. im thinking a lil birthday gift to myself will be my levi tattoo in late july :3 eee im so excited

anyway if u've read this far then THANKS ik im rambling lol

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary167

2/27-28/2024

wednesday - thursday

i'm sisisisitting here, and i have a bank acct. now.

my card is gonna be sent to my parent's place, i've gotta go over there to get it, in about a week i suppose. that'll be interesting but i talked to my mom today. not about the card yet, but i'll talk about it tomorrow i think, when we talk more. she is not mad at me, it seems like.

i got really dressed up for the bank today, look!

people were nice to me basically except in walmart where lots of people stared at me, and then this guy that worked there looked totally totally totally disgustedddd. it was fun. i wish i told him to fuck off. i need to stick up for myself better. i think that'd be like, sticking up for myself, right. or is staring back the only thing i should really do? idk.

i ate too many chips today, also, so i'm feeling yucky rn. blehh.

just found out about a really awesome seeming book:

gonna find out more abt this soon, the publisher too, the bits my friend is sending me from this book of poetry are really really good.

just really really beautiful writing, grounding itself in / exploring/ telling history, in ways it is typically not told. a beautiful project, at minimum. but it does not feel like it's just hitting that minimum, truly good writing. it's also from 2023, which is super exciting i think. good writing is still coming, you just have to look.

another thing today, i got new lyrics and vocals down on a song, i wonder if i care about the lyrics that much, but idk, i think it's good, it's definitely about a lot of stuff i've been thinking about lately, re: music people, dj scene and stuff. frustrations. it felt good to scream, today, cuz of being so fucked up yesterday i guess.

i think maybe i could go in and re-record the middle bit and parts of the end, but i think the way the song opens vocally is good. i might also just be having funny issues w/ the sound of the vox. idk. we will see how i feel tomorrow. but since i did that i did also mess w/ how the song sounds, did the saturation thing to it, and that does sound quite good, imo.

tomorrow i need to do some more songs, just re: producing/mastering, i wanna do at least 2-3, and maybe on the 3rd i do a song that has vocals but i want to replace them entirely, so i can start thinking of new ideas for the song.

i also have a new idea for a drawing, that's fun, a new little pixel art ornament thingy.

listening to a lot of the album now, to see how things are coming along, one song still has overly saturated vocals, and some little pieces that need cutting, should be easy enough, i think i like that vocal take, i should sit on the take still, not go in and do that, and for the most part everything is feeling like, good, i think. coming along well, and stuff i thought was worse off isn't too bad really. that might change tomorrow for me but we'll see. there's gonna be a time where i need to just let this all go, and put this out. that time definitely feels like it's coming. or idk, that makes it sound like i'm just putting less effort in, i don't think that's true, it's just that things really are wrapping up in a way i feel like. like how many more times can i conceivably mess with nuances of guitar tone, everything is getting closer and closer to what i want, what isn't that's just getting cut and put off for later, and i can tell at least one of the songs i cut is going to really benefit from that, since i can rewrite parts and have something last longer, i can have this part i really like be like, a closer for this next ep maybe.

anyway, it's like 1 am and i need to prepare for the next days of work where i'm going in at 11 am soo,

byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[doebt]

had a pretty good day/evening/24hrs all things considered but ive become very sad all of a sudden. its so sad how people move on. its so sad how people change...its so sad and so weird to look back on. idk. a couple yrs ago. going to football games w my friends just to hang out not even to watch the game just to talk and eat the nachos. everything felt so new and so right...and now its like. over forever and i dont even talk to them

[infernalrevenge]

HCs abt an S/O of Lady D's who's struggling to get her daughters' approval? It's rarely addressed in fanfics, but y'all.. becoming a stepparent is a hard and frustrating journey, especially when mama and kids have such tight bonds. Makes small wins feel so rewarding, tho! What are your thoughts on that? How would D react, how would she help? (or make it harder, in true possessive Mother Hen™ fashion..) Which flybaby would warm up to S/O first? How would S/O try to win each of them over, etc..?

Oooh this is a really cool thought! Not that I have a lot of experience with stepparents but yeah, changes and adjustments in family dynamics like that can't be easy. I think I'm gonna have some fun with this.

When the Dimitrescu sisters found out you were the human dating their mother, at first they were mostly indifferent. Not like it's their business as to who Alcina gets it on with anyway (and they could also be thinking you would quickly turn to lunch if you fuck up badly enough, in which case they would gladly join her in the feast.)

They might quip with you sometimes, but for the most part, you're left alone.

But when they realized you were here to stay and might become a parental figure in their life... oh boy.

You're telling them they have to answer to you now? A mere mortal? On what grounds? Just because you have sex with their mom? They think the fuck not.

Hell, they're individually old enough to be your parent, so truly... what the fuck?

(Part of that fear of you joining the family may come from thinking that Alcina now has someone else to preoccupy herself with, so there's less time for them. Perhaps even less love for them. They can't have that. That can't happen.)

As for your partner's reaction? She's kind of torn. On one hand, she understands how her daughters feel about having a new family member suddenly join the dynamic -- someone they barely know relative to each other. You could have been around for a few years, but they've been all together for more than half a century, and they're doing just fine.

On the other, she wants to see you all getting along. She loves you and wants you to be a part of her life, and of course she also loves her daughters with all her heart.

She's not really sure what to do, so she kind of... ends up not doing anything.

But she is curious as to what you'll do about the situation though, since the sisters would hardly make it a secret that your presence is an annoyance at best, completely unwanted and unwelcome at worst.

Bela, surprisingly, might be the hardest to win over. You would think that, as the eldest, she should be the one to lead by example and be the mature one. Plus, she's always looking for her mother's approval, so approving of you may get her on her good side (and yours.)

But she's very opposed to change, especially one that affects her life this much when it's not her choice.

She lets Cassandra and Daniela get away with pulling harmless pranks on you to get under your skin, or make Alcina mad at you. She pretends to not have a direct hand in them and would passive-aggressively remark on whatever they did.

Oh, your clothes were misplaced and looking for new ones made you late to a date with the Lady? "None of them were very nice anyway. This is doing you a favor."

You found dog poop under your bed and now you reek? "I don't smell that much of a difference."

Getting doused in sticky honey and molasses somehow? "At least Mother has a reason to think you're sweet now."

They would never do anything to hurt you, not unless they want to incur their mother's wrath or sadness, just... little things (hopefully enough to get you to leave.)

But luckily, if you're a patient and persistent person, they (ever so) slowly warm up to you in different ways.

The most important thing to remember is that they're different people despite having a lot of things in common, so your manner of approaching them will have to vary for each sister.

Daniela might be the easiest to win over, such a sociable little fly. She might try to be standoffish at first, but if you bring up a book series that she enjoys reading as a topic for conversation, she can and will keep you there for hours talking about the characters, dissecting certain themes, and explaining her theories of the inner machinations of the plot.

If you actually start reading it upon her recommendation, she becomes ecstatic. Finally, someone other than her sisters she can explain these theories to! And someone who can actually relate and add on to them!

Eventually, she'll come to realize that having you around won't mean the end of their family. It just means they're getting more out of it -- a new member to love, and one who loves them.

Cassandra might be a little territorial about her current interests, so you'll have to take on a different approach.

Maybe try introducing her to something that peripherally matches what she likes now. She seems to really like hunting and torture to take her aggression out on, so uh... maybe try martial arts?

It would be more fun if it was something the both of you were new at, so you could bond over attempting to do things together. Nothing says "I want to get to know my stepdaughter better" like letting her throw you to the mat and laugh in excitement when she gets the technique right.

She is still very stubborn though, so she may take a while to fully convince. Even when it seems like you're on her good side, there's a tiny bit of denial. But she'll come around, no matter how reluctant.

Finally, as for Bela, she just needs to see that, though most of her family now genuinely likes you, that it doesn't have to change a thing about how they feel about her either. They're not going to abandon her or anything that drastic just because someone new has entered their lives.

Seeing her sisters approve of you can be jarring, no matter how long or gradual the process may have been. Like, weren't they switching out your shampoos and putting snakes in your closet last year? Why is everyone buddy buddy now? (Why are they leaving her behind?)

She'll start to act bitter toward everyone, feeling like she's been betrayed and shut herself away. She doesn't even want to see her own mother anymore.

But eventually, you have to talk to Alcina to do something too -- she could see you were making an effort, but she's not making it clear to her daughters what exactly was happening. She should be the first to approach Bela regarding the subject, along with her sisters.

You may need some time alone with her as well to drive the point home too. Having more people in the family doesn't mean less love, but in fact it means more, because now you're there to care for her too.

And she has to admit that seeing her mother care for you, having her sisters like you, it didn't really feel like they were any different towards her. They were more insistent in getting her to spend time with you, sure, but other than that... things were mostly the same.

The acceptance may be begrudging at first, but when she actually gets used to this new norm, she'll come around.

If you want to bond with her, you can teach her something. She likes learning new things, and she'll start to warm up to you more if she has reason to keep going to you to get this new information.

It can be anything -- music, arts, sports, cooking, you name it. Even introducing her to new technology will help get on her good side. You'd be surprised at how quickly she gets into it that you start to wonder why it was so hard to get her to like you in the first place.

Also, just talk to her. As a person, as your new daughter, whatever. Just acknowledge her and be honest. She appreciates the little things.

All in all, it's going to be tough. The journey will have its ups and downs, and not everything is going to be smooth sailing. Communication is key, though, as with any sort of relationship. Let the girls know you care for them just as much as you love and care for their mother. In a way, that's all they really want.

But they're not calling you "mom/dad/parental unit". First name basis with a stepparent (affectionate) all the way.

[saradesuchiha]

hi it's des ü

ig i need to share this to u guys...

i've been experiencing pain in my right forearm more than 2 weeks. i continued working on loads, commissions, and atleast doodle once a day while enduring the strain. i have a tendency of overworking and completely overdoing things and not stopping bc i don't like being idle while i know i have queued work. i thought the pain will soon go away if i take it easy during my days off like i used to do, but it didn't. the pain became intolerable and i hardly can't lift or move my arm anymore.

last tuesday, i had it checked and was diagnosed w lateral epicondylitis; it's a condition that causes microtears to the elbow tendon due to overuse. the doctor said it will take abt 6-8 weeks to heal, if the pain prolonged, then i will have to consider taking shots and it will take almost half a year or so to recover. he also advised me to rest and atleast 2 weeks off strenuous activities and other miscellaneous tasks, take prescribed pain relievers and attend scheduled physical therapy. when i feel better, i can return doing my normal routine slowly.

my mom and i had an argument as we head home. she told me to just quit my job and she's been very vocal abt it eversince i took the offer. i work from home for 10hrs for four straight days, night 'til morning + i take side jobs or make art commissions to earn extra during my days off. i'm comfortable w this setup bc i don't have to go to the office and has less financial stress. i'm the breadwinner in my family, so i have to work hard and earn more than enough, else, my family and i will not have anything to fill our plates and pay the bills. but my work and lifestyle are affecting my health. i have chronic stress, insomnia, and now, tennis elbow pain.

i understand her concerns are for my well-being, but i love and want this job and i don't want to quit. i stayed in my room and cried myself the whole day and can't focus on anything. i realized how greatly affected my life is bc of one injury. i'm afraid of losing my predominant arm and its a vital part on my skills. i'm more afraid of what will happen to my family if i'm dysfunctional for weeks or if i completely quit my job. i have no one to blame other than myself.

i'm just relieved it's nothing worse, but it will take few weeks to feel better. i'm still absorbing and trying to process everything in my mind. i already got things sorted out quickly at my work and they're very understanding abt the situation. atleast what i can do for now is try to ease my mind, be patient, and not force myself to work if i'm in pain, else i'm going to suffer more.

sorry if this post is quite sad. i have this weighing on my chest and i just want to take it out. i want to tell u guys too and not worry if i'm inactive. ig i'll try to come back after first 2 weeks of recovery period and not over do it. i'm not going to make full art for a while but i'll still doodle every now and then. i still have pending entries for march fan events and other related fanarts in my drafts. it feels frustrating that can't finish them on time for each event. but i'm still going to post them even they are beyond late once i finish them.

i hope u guys are all doing well, always safe and take good care of urselves. thank u for taking time reading this. see u guys soon~ 🌤️