#but it’s like they don’t have time to explore any random fun character-bonding stuff because they need to keep the plot going

[robyntheredhead]

I’m really liking Hazbin Hotel, but Jesus I am so sick of streaming shows having short seasons. It would’ve benefited so much even from just another 4 episodes to spread things out a bit.

It feels like the show was just getting started, and now we’re already at the conflict leading into the finale.

[aclosetfan]

HIIII, I know it's completely random to come and ask about this, but curiosity was already killing me! I really wanted to know your favorite fanfics/users about our community of 5 rises from the shadows every 1 fanart posted per year 🤩 (Laughing at the misery)

But anyway, I'm just asking because you'll always be my favorite even after years, for me no one will ever be able to understand and write the characters exactly the way I imagine you do, and I wanted to know a little more about your point of view on PPG fanfics/creators. (Please never stop even with random headcanons during the week because I need them to make my month happier and survive in this fandom 😭)

The main question is right in the first part, but I just wanted to be able to express a little bit how much I love your profile, even though I'm not very good with words... Thanks for reading this far! ♡ (Sorry if I got some words wrong, English is not my first language and it doesn't even make the top 3. This is my first question on this app, i'm hoping to make a comeback, so please ignore the mistakes for I can sleep peacefully tonight 😀 God I'm addicted to emojis)

Thank you so much! <3 This is so sweet! Really, it means a lot that you like my characterizations so much. It took a lot of practice :) Please don’t apologize for anything!! gosh, this is such a hard ask because there are literally only five people, like you said 😂😂 I feel like I’ve been out of the game for a bit, so if there’s been any new exciting fan stuff, I haven’t seen it.

When it comes to favorite users, I’ve made a lot of friends over the years. A lot of those people have deactivated or moved on after CW announced their show, so, for simplicity, I’m not going to name anyone because I’d feel bad leaving someone out. But truly, I’ve liked everyone I’ve had the opportunity to talk and bond over the show with. The little corner I’ve hung out with is a good group, and it’s nice to still see old faces pop up every once in a while. If anything, I haven't deleted or let go of this blog because I don’t want all the fun posts we’ve made to go too. I like them being somewhere, and it’s still important to me.

With respect to fics I’ll give you three! Whenever I’m asked this, I always link The Notion of Loss by Gold Scribbles (completed). It’s one of my faves. It’s dark. There’s major character death, and it’s not cutesy (which is what I prefer), but I loved loved loved the characterizations.

My next fave fic is no longer available 😭 (or at the very least, I can no longer find it). The premise involves the rrb coming back. Their goal was to kill the girls. They jumped Bubbles to get their attention and attacked her to the point of disfigurement. Of course, Buttercup and Blossom are out for blood via enhanced antidote-X. They end up capturing Boomer as bait (call back to the og show), and are able to fight Brick and Butch. Buttercup kills but not without Butch doing the classic “See, you’re as bad as me! Haha!” which she ends up internalizing in the post-time skip. Blossom ends up killing Brick but at the sacrifice of her own life, which is the only way to stop him, and the scene where she comes to peace with things is heart-wrenching. The epilogue shows Buttercup lamenting over Butch’s last words and honoring her sister by finishing her work. Bubbles, with scarring that never healed, visits Boomer in jail, who she sees every week to spend time with him. She’s kind and polite because she believes he can be better, and it drives him crazy. AND I LOVVVVEEED IT. But it’s gone now. And it hurts.

My third rec is Pencils Tell a Little Too Much by Iminaloine (completed). It's a Butch-centric fic that explores how he's able to channel his anger and more intense emotions through art, which is 10/10!!

And because one of my fic recs doesn't have a link, here's 2 extra! everybody screams at the end of the world by fuckin-rodent (incomplete). While it's incomplete, it sets up a post-apocalyptic story like no other. I also really like heartsickness by the same author, which is a greens story.

Finally, while I don’t want to stop making stuff for you, I’ve obviously slowed down :(( The blog's still on hiatus; I'm sorry! I finished school and have recently started a new job. I don't know when I'll have time to more consistently update, which I know I've been saying for years now, but that's just growing up sometimes :/ And because I've been so busy, I'm feeling pretty uninspired about things. I haven't written anything new in months for any of my own writing projects or fandoms.

I do have another fan blog for my general fan interests that I sometimes write on (justanotherfanwriter). I can't guarantee you'll find something you like, but I'm more active on there solely because that's where I reblog a larger variety of fan content and sometimes write one-shots for other fandoms. But when it comes to the fics, again, I haven't been very inspired, so there isn't much there. It's pretty devoid of my own content, actually. So, I don't have many friends through that blog!

I also have a side blog for my own writing projects, but that has a dismal, like, 10 posts on it because I've got nothing up in my brain rn. Also, it's harder to write when you have no friends to brainstorm with! I def need more friends who'd talk about personal projects with me, not just fanfics!! If anyone has made it this far down the post, let me know if this is something you'd be interested in (just for shits and giggles at this point nothing serious)

[teeterarting]

here's a list of things i love about PSMD for no reason other than i think it deserves appreciation (spoilers)

the hero gets adopted by a nuzleaf. Hero, a young child that doesn't know why they were brought into this world, attacked by beheeyem, scared and alone, finds someone that takes them under his wing and gives them a home. it's really sweet that once Nuzleaf brings them to the Village, Hero's not alone anymore.

yes it was all a trick, he deceived you. but being betrayed by your father figure hits so much harder. it's much more personal, especially when both Hero and Partner are kids. and when Nuzleaf goes through all that ordeal in the post game, then gets accepted back into the village?? And his little speech to Hero????? it's heartbreaking and incredibly touching at the same time

everything is just so cute!!!! you go to school with your new friendo and you're friends with the schoolkids, and you make the trip to school every morning taking in the scenery, the smell of dew and fresh grass, and the sun on your face... and you take classes about Mystery Dungeon mechanics, and principal Simipour is a big BRO, the school nurse Audino is super kind and helpful... and you get to play with your pokemon friendos in summer vacation, and explore a dungeon with 'em... AND your bond with your Partner begins to form, getting stronger and stronger from then on. PSMD's beginning arc is so warm and pleasant, it's like reliving childhood memories all over again, when things were happier and you didn't have to worry about how cruel the world is. this story section's one purpose is to get the player used to the game's mechanics, as well as foreshadowing. unfortunately most of the school kids get forgotten later on, but I still love this part for everything it is, even if unintentional.

it's not just the beginning that's cute. PSMD'S ENTIRE WORLD IS ADORABLE. It's just filled with life every town you go. there are a bunch of pokemon locals and they all have interesting things to say, in the main story and the post-game. there's a point where their comments get repetitive, but that's bound to happen in any PMD game. Even then, the days are never the same. one morning you wake up and the Lively Town locals are exercising, then the next they're having singing lessons, and then they're practicing martial arts. and you get to connect with (or recruit) some of them just by.... chatting!!! Sitting next to that big ol' venusaur and sharing stories, laughing and having fun. it's good stuff.

Sometimes you find travelling pokemon in dungeons and it's jsut the coolest thing. Imagine you're exploring a dungeon, then your Connection Orb notifies you there's a fellow explorer in the floor. First thing you do is try to find them, and when you do - oh dang a travelling Archeops!!!! And then they just,,,, exchange their experiences and thoughts on exploration and how hard it is to fend off those enemies and the cool treasure they found the other day (the game calls it "[Team Name] and [Traveller pokemon] compared notes"). then the traveller heals you, fills your belly and restores your PP. and they go on their way. idk man it's such a cute interaction. explorers chatting, empathizing and helping each other, bc their job is not an easy one...

PSMD Partner is the most developed Partner in any PMD game yet. They start off as this naive, hyperactive kiddo, then stuff happens, and worse stuff happens, and you get to see how they grow and change and by the end they're a different person than they were before (in more than one way ...). It's just so nice to be by their side, from the beginning to the bitter end, and watch their growth. in contrast, Hero is a little unbalanced in that their backstory is not explored as much, and their personality is kind of a blank - probs meant to be vague so the player can be in their shoes. to me this just gives you the opportunity to shape their character however you want, so you can have tons of different hero/pardner dynamics.

The music is rlly flippin' good. Some of the tracks are recycled from previous entries, but when they go original??? it's a blast!!! "Echoes of the Mystical Forest" is one of my favorites in all four entries, it has no right being so amazing for a random dungeon. "Time to Set Out" makes me cry immediately (also i think it would be a better fit for the parting ways scene at the end...). Don't even get me started on "Second Dark Matter Battle", it has everything an epic climax needs and MORE. the Partner remix????? absolute genius

speaking of which, Dark Matter ITSELF,, is freaking amazing. Its actions were foreshadowed in the very beginning, though they were not blatant through the game. i do think they could have done a better job at showing the pokemon's negativity raising in the world, as well as negative feelings in the characters... but it's not like Gates did a good job at it, either (outside of cutscenes, all the locals in Post Town are incredibly nice to you and fights didn't "break out often". it's like the game tells you the world is a dark place, but what it shows in gameplay doesn't add up). so i'll cut them some slack. Still, I find Dark Matter a more compelling villain than the Bittercold for several reasons. it is sentient. its speech is a jumbled amount of voices all talking at the same time - the anguished voices of the world. It actually concocted a plan to hurl the planet into the Sun, using pawns like Nuzleaf and Yveltal to do its dirty job. in the Voidlands, Hero and Partner discover its past, and how it'll come back after defeat, like a cycle. when Partner accepts Dark Matter, they accept negative feelings as something everyone has within themselves. Most of all, the fact that Dark Matter is a manifestation of negative feelings doesn't make it just a generic threat, a final obstacle to be defeated so the world can be saved. It makes Dark Matter - negativity itself - a natural part of the world, the yin to its yang. and that's why I LOVE IT SO MUCH DANG IT EVEN THANKS PARTNER FOR THEIR ACCEPTANCE

The fact that Dark Matter can possess pokemon that have "even the smallest amount of darkness in their hearts". it makes me think of Mr. Nuzleaf and what he might have gone through in the past to make him so easy to be controlled. Did he hold a grudge against someone?? Did he commit a crime?? Had Nuzleaf always been malicious???? And if so, is this why he shows so much remorse in the post-game??????? because he had always been this vile fiend and then he met this small kid and got attached, but still carried on with his evil actions because his malice was still stronger than the positive feelings and Dark Matter's hold on him intensified?????? I don't know!!!! and as much as i wish the game could have given us that sweet mr. Nuzleaf backstory, it's pretty fun to have freedom to come up with your own version.

Everything about Super's climax is just phenomenal. Every single flippin' legendary is there to help you. Arceus is in the game. MEWTWO IS THERE. and when things are looking hopeless, they really seem hopeless. First the Tree of Life is dying, then your allies get turned into stone and sent to hell The Voidlands, Arceus gets turned into stone, the entire world is stone (except for several mon' that are still safe and holding onto hope, but they're so few). Your Harmony Scarves stop working and you and your Partner are back to your feeble, basic stage forms. You are bordering exhaustion, you have no Emeras, it's just you and your Partner against an eldritch abomination that's killing the life on the entire planet like a parasite, devouring all hope. but you still fight back. Given how adults in the game always discourage the village children from going adventuring, that they cannot do this or that because they're so little and fragile, it's awesome how Hero and Partner beat Dark Matter as tiny kids.

PSMD is not a flawless game. in fact there's plenty of things that hold it back and i even mentioned some... but it's still full of love put into it and it resonates w me more than PMD Explorers of T/D/S and Gates to Infinity (Rescue Team is a close second). its my all-time favorite PMD game.

[silverhart-makes-art]

I just finished reading What Once Was Mine! Gotta say, I enjoyed it more than I thought I would. It was a wild, fun little romp. I ended up having a lot to say about it, so prepare for some rambling thoughts. I’ve tried to avoid any major spoilers, but if you’d rather read the story completely blind, you’ll want to skip over this.

I’ve never read one of the Twisted Tales books before, so I’m not sure what my expectations were going in. The story is basically that Rapunzel’s hair has death powers instead of healing powers, which is the reason she’s hidden away. As a premise for a story it’s definitely a good one. She escapes her tower, meeting Gina and Flynn and the three of them (four with Pascal) try to avoid capture by all the people who are after Rapunzel to use her as a weapon. Along the way she learns more about her powers, falls in love with Eugene, gets into scrapes, makes friends with some goats. Standard fantasy novel stuff. Mother Gothel is there, as vain and manipulative as ever, but we also have a new bigger baddie thrown into the mix. It was fun to see Rapunzel go up against a more outright villain. The Captain gets an expanded role too, which warmed my Cap-lovin’ old heart. He’s a mix of the film’s Captain of the Guard and Maximus, and I love how the author blended their two roles, but also made Captain Tregsburg his own unique person (he’s also obsessed with horses, which makes him the best character by default).

One thing I really loved was seeing Rapunzel have a little more independence and agency over her own story. Arguably the film Tangled is more centered on Eugene –his actions have the most effect on the plot - so it’s nice to see Rapunzel be the one in the driver’s seat this time. She is just lovely. She keeps messing up different animals’ names, because all she knows of them are stylized drawing in her books. There’s a moment where she gets distracted by the desire to hug a random horse – it’s adorable. She gets a lot of great moments to assert herself as well. She very much feels like her own person.

I found the treatment of the violence and dark themes interesting – there’s a lot of death, and blood, mentions of torture –grisly stuff. But it isn’t treated with the gravitas I’m used to from young adult books, so it felt like it was geared for a younger audience. I guess I was expecting something more Disneyfied, where the violence is either toned down, or made into these big emotionally wrought moments. It’s not a bad thing, it just stuck out to me. How we treat violence in media has just been on my mind a lot lately. I’m interested in checking out more Twisted Tales books to see how they handle the darker elements as well. I’m usually not a fan of remaking children’s content into something more serious and 'mature’, but that’s because it’s done for no reason other than shock value. I didn’t feel that was the case here; the story is different enough and the concept dark enough that it warrants a darker atmosphere. And despite this there’s still an element of lightheartedness to it – the situations are serious, but the characters are still fun. Seeing them, especially Rapunzel, still find brightness and humor and hope in a dark, scary world is really endearing.

My only critique would be that a lot of story threads and themes get introduced and then dropped. Tangled is a very close-knit movie – it knows what it wants to say, and the themes it wants to explore, and those themes are fully planted early on, and wrapped up nicely by the end. This book just throws ideas at you left and right, at any given moment, and not all of them are given the time to really feel impactful. A lot of them felt like they were shoehorned in because they’re part of the franchise, so you have to have them in some form, but other elements just seem to be thrown in for extra flavor. No one theme stands out, and it’s just sort of this wild medley of ideas, especially where the magic is concerned. The result is that some things don’t feel fully fleshed out, like there was no setup to certain elements, and no payoff for others. I don’t think that’s such a bad thing in a story though. This is obviously a story that is meant purely to entertain.

One thing you can’t say though, is that it’s a boring book. There is just way too much being thrown at you, and some of it is wild. The writing is super snappy and everything moves very fast, so you hardly have time to worry about any dropped story threads. It feels totally different from the world of the film, but it’s got the same flavor of a wacky, fun adventure - just with a lot more death and bloodshed.

And I mention all that preamble, because I really just want to gush about Captain Tregsburg. Like the man’s love of horses, or the fact that Eugene calls him Treggsy, and I think that’s adorable. He’s not quite the Captain of the Guard we all know and love, but he feels like his own character. I love him, love his weird yet somehow perfect character arc, love that he just gives a random old lady a spoon, love that he stares out the window looking at horses and thinking about them all day when he’s not riding (like me, everyday). There is somewhat of an attempt to have Eugene and Captain have a father-son bonding moment. It doesn’t really have enough of a setup to really work, but it was very sweet, and I applaud the effort. Cap and Eugene and Maximus all coming to respect and care for each other is really all I ever want. Where is my Tangled buddy-cop spin-off of the three of them solving equine-related crimes already?

Apparently, the Captain also just knows the owner of the Snuggly Duckling. One of the guards questions this, and he never answers. Like does he moonlight at the pub as a jazz singer on the weekends? Are they star-crossed lovers? Father and son? What are your secrets,Tregsburg?! I must know.

Again, so many story threads that seem to be setting something up are just never brought up again. That’s a relatively minor one, but there are bigger ones too, such as Arianna being set up as a character but then never dipping into the story, or the Sundrop flower being mentioned repeatedly, but never really coming into the story at all.

I can’t say it really bothered me too much though. Overall it was just a very fun read. I had a great time. Strongest part was definitely the characters - it was delightful to read about old favorites in a much darker and strange world, and the new characters were lovely too. I love that extra time was taken to just let Rapunzel explore and learn on her own. It felt like the author was having a lot of fun just playing around with the world and the characters, and I couldn’t help but have fun too.

[hopeassassin]

Rally’s Scribbles in the Work

So after that lovely anon blew my mind away with their kind words and wonderful support, and because I keep telling you guys about my writing plans without actually giving you even a teensy little detail, I have decided to stop being coy and actually likely get your hopes up a bit by dilvulging small details and bits of plots of what is currently going on in my G-Drive. 

This will be a brief recount of what I have currently baking in the AoMomo oven, so let’s dive right into it! Please note that the numbers are in no particular order - I just keep revisiting each of these stories and writing a bit more to them whenever I feel like it. So there’s no ranking and no importance, just a number to keep proper count.

1. “Knight of Renown” Dragons and Knighthood AU, based on that one AoMomo pic with Momo ithe Knight and Dragon Aomine that I reblogged a while back and I actually let me imagination go a bit too much in the tags. I ended up actually rather enjoying the premise I set up in the tags so I actually started writing that one out!  Completion rate at about: 5%? I’d say? Less? :D 

2. AoMomo Music AU - a dearly beloved project that I am pouring a lot of love and attentioin to. That’s why it’s coming along super slow. It’s been in the making since November and I chewed it and mulled through it so thoroughly that I’ve grinded to a halt with it. Intending for there to be 2 chapters, and I am at about 25-30% of chapter 1 currently ready currently. At the pace I’m going, it might be another full year before you actually get to see this bad boy up, but when you do, I’m sure you’ll see all the care and effort that went into making it perfect. Honestly, no joke here, I am intending for this to be one of my rare masterpieces in this tag. So I’m not gonna rush it!

3. AoMomo Car Accident AU where Daiki barely manages to save Satsuki from being run over by a hit-and-run and ends up being the one run over instead. This was my first piece of writing after coming back to AoMomo last summer and yet completion rate is a sad thing. I want it to be flawless, a perfectly agonizing, thrilling type of torturous read that gives you a great sense of relief by the end of it. Needless to say, the clusterfuck of negative feelings is a bit difficult to hold onto for a prolonged period of time and the work is coming along slowly. Planned at about 5 chapters, I have 2 complete ones and the 3rd one is at about ... 30%? Hopefully before this year’s whumptober, we’ll have a finished piece!

4. AoMomo bond character study, which went in a direction I did NOT expect nor intend. It was suppsoed to be an idea that you will see also listed below. But I started this one from their early childhood and somehow, instead of focusing on the kids and their bond and their weird interactions with each other and their first moments of realizing they are of opposite genders, it turned into something much too fun to let go of and the ideas for scenes just kept piling. It’s going to be a long one, very explorative and very in-depth character study on the bond between these two and how it changed over the years, and their first encounters with their sexuality inbetween (because that was really the main idea that I started with... xDDD;;;) Currently at 1 chapter complete, chapter 2 somewhere around 50-60% completion, and at least 6-7 chapters to come after that, soooo.... :’DDDD YEAH. THIS ONE AIN’T SEEING THE LIGHT OF DAY ANYTIME SOON.

5. AoMomo deciding to practice stuff on each other, because I am a sucker for this trope.THIS will be what the idea under previous number 4 was SUPPOSED to be like, but it instead spun out of control. So this one, under number 5, is going to be the smutty, idiots bumbling through physicality to discover that they actually have serious feelings for each other kind of piece. Chapters are planned at about at least 6-7 or so, but not my usual monstrocities! :D First we start with practice kissing, and we move our way up from there! 

6. “The Evil of Humanity” AU - a dystopian futuristic kinda mecha AU, sort of an amalgamation of some of my favourite anime in the genre - a bit of NGE, a bit of Gurren-Lagann, a lot of Darling in the Franxx rewrite and improvement, in distinctly AoMomo colors. I poured a lot of thought and love into initial outline of main moments for this one, and I really hope to make it an epic, thrilling action/adventure with a big dash of romance kind of read! Chapters currently not even planned properly, because I need to sit down and consider this seriously. It will definitely be more than 10-15 though, and they will be my usual chapter lengths so.... likely no time soon. :D 

7. Aomine Fanclub - I got a plot bunny some time ago and I shared it here and my friends were spurring me on with it, so I started trying it out a little more. I’ve written out like... maybe 30% of this one as well, but need to re-read and reconceptualize to get it back on track. The issue with this one is that I’m not really sure where I want to take it, thus it’s on the back burner at the moment.

8. KagaKuro AoMomo double-date kind of story, where Aomine is asking some curious questions of Taiga about going to America and pondering if any of his immediate friends know what Satsuki wants to do with her life. I’m really invested in this one but haven’t started properly writing it out yet beyond just sketching out the idea so I don’t forget it. (I’d say 1% complete here.) Really looking forward to using the idea of Kagami being super impressed with AoMomo perfect sync when playing as a team in arcade games!

9.Laws of Attraction Chapter 2 - You might be surprised at this, but I’m actually super invested in this one. Likely the reason why I am delaying so much working on it - I feel like all my great scene ideas are just too chaotic and I have a hard time starting the chapter flowing properly. I had like 4-5 false starts already and I’m feeling a bit skittish with picking it up. But I have such AMAZING concepts on where to take it after it revvs up the engine, so... Maybe sometime this year! Completion rate: 0% written, but at least about 30% ideas built up for the installment!

10. AoMomo college rooming together story - sort of an expansion on my fill for one of the prompts way back those years ago in AoMomo week. I really dig the concept and the trope of sharing spaces with someone you consider nothing more than a friend and then gradually learning to appreciate each other for something so much more. I am definitely doing this one some day, but not anytime soon, likely.

11. A random idea bit me the other day (read: a month ago) and I actually wrote out like... maybe 25% of it already as well. A random comment from Wakamatsu miffs Satsuki but then she realizes why he’s asking dumb questions and she comes to realize that something is wrong with the equation: either Dai-chan likes someone really close to them and she hasn’t realized, which is unlikely, or Dai-chan likes HER and is super blase about it in a way that betrays his feelings not at all, which is even more unlikely. Being a curious  individual, she sets out to find which it is! Some hilarity should ensue but mostly just some mess-with-Dai-chan fun!

12. Touou summer training camp at the sea - progress is practically 0, I wanted to write a summery piece and set my mind on this, but nothing beyond has come to me, so I’m not forcing it.

13. AoMomo cultural festival fic in second year of high school (meaning something approx end of Oct -> beginning of Nov.) with Daiki being in a distinctly Haruhu Suzumiya role at that festival (has anyone even seen this anime? I adored that episode to freaking bits, man, it’s engraved upon my soul) and singing Billy Idol’s “Rebel Yell” and one more song just like Haruhi did. And Satsuki just beholding the phenomenon he becomes in no time flat while he lays bare his passion for life for all the student body to see. Shippiness will happen in private afterwards!

14. You Can Leave Your Hat On Chapter 2 - Probably like 2-3 years ago while I was still in the damn woodwork and wrestling with real life and adulting being crap, I remembered this AU premise and I got super hyped on the idea of Club Owner Dai-chan being a flirt with innocent Satsuki who got dragged to his joined and fell in love at first sight with his shenanigans. I’ve already played around for like 7k words with the second chapter of this but I’m still not where I want to be at, so it will take a while longer to flesh it out.

15. Idol Worship - a story that I promised my mate aricana some 6 years ago the premise for which I am super hyped for but not quite engaging with it yet. The idea was that Momoi finally starts gettiing the dates she has been pesting Kuroko for for years, and Daiki feeling terrible about beholding that, whilst Kise is being pestered by Horikita Mai for a date and instead ditches her with Daiki because he knows his former Teikou classmate is a huge fan of her. Mai-chan isn’t particularly happy but somehow ends up enjoying her time with Daiki and starts considering actually pursuing him instead of Kise when she sees what an interesting soul he is, with the torch that he’s carrying for some girl in his life he doesn’t really talk about but is evident from the little things he drops off as hits. AoMomo shenanigans will start to ensue properly when Satsuki realizes that Daiki is actually having a close female friend who is not her but is Horikita Mai instead, Dai-chan’s perfect woman, practically. She doesn’t take well to the news and has to grapple with why that is! And what to do with these newfound frustrating emotions!

16. Obstruction of Justice Chapter 3 - MAYBE SOME DAY, I WILL GET TO WRITING THIS. Last summer I inteded to do just that but instead, Wild Side of Justice was born. And it became a spin off of sorts on its own. ORZ. I WILL FINISH THIS SOME DAY, I do have some plans for it and I do have the desire to pursue them. I just need to be in the right headspace for it ahsjkfhkjaf

17. A PWP story of Kagami arriving early for a practice match at Touou and somehow walking in on AoMomo getting busy with each other in very unexpected and explicit ways that Kagami did not see headed his way. Because, we need more PWP in this fandom, honestly.

18. And since we DO need more PWP, recently when checking the 30 lemons community on LJ (shut up, I’m not ancient, YOU’RE ANCIENT) I was wondering how exactly a smut plot around the “Taken by the Faceless Stranger” could work for Aomomo and I came up with this Masquerade ball that they end up both attending because of their friends and meeting each other and hitting off fantastically just chatting the night and then banging in a niche in the long castle-like premise of the ball. :’DDDD Cuz it’s me and if I don’t have something like that in the works, you know i’m likely sick.

ALL OF THESE I am planning on eventually finishing one day. ONE DAY!

For now they are in various states of completion and in various stages of being cared for and improved on with more ideas added and fleshed out.

I am not joking when I say I am very invested in this fandom. I just have difficulty getting to writing out these ideas when I spend like 60% of my free time playing my mobile games. :D 

So there you have it. I didn’t want to say anything about these because 1) I don’t want to get your hopes up. You Can Leave Your Hat On 2, for one, has been in the making for 3 years, very on-again-off-again kind of way, and I just... can’t do that to you guys. I have decided against posting any incomplete fics so I don’t torture you guys and my muse doesn’t abandom me forever for them. So when something is complete, it gets posted promptly for your viewing pleasure!

And 2) If I divulge too much of the story, I feel like my hype of it may disappear completely. Ehh, my muse is a willful creature, what can I tell you... 

So let’s hope at least SOME of these get to see the light of day soon!

[walkwithheroes84]

Saved By the Bell (2020) Thoughts

 When the original Saved by the Bell ended in 1992, I was still in elementary school and certainly hadn’t watched it’s first run. But over the years - via repeats - it has become something of a comfort show for me, that I turn to when I’m feeling down or just need something cheesy to chill out to. So, hen I heard about a reboot on the Peacock network, I was unsure. 

Now, having finished the ten episode season in just two days, I’m really hoping people give this show a chance. It knows what it is and what it is the child of and it lovingly pokes fun at and embraces it. All while actually showing real issues that people are facing today.

Here are my real-time after thoughts on each episode. Warning for spoilers. 

1.01: Pilot

Zack becoming Governor to get out of a parking ticket and then having no idea what to do is a very Saved by the Bell plot line. But, I love that he's not getting away with doing a bad job and the people of California actually seem to be upset with him. Also random, but - I wonder if Kelly is a doctor and why she hasn't kicked Zack to the curb if he's become such a skeevy person? I guess it is true love.

Jessie and Slater and still adorable, even as platonic friends. However, it's sad that she's kept her son so dependent on her and that it appears that Slater peeked in high school.

Lexi and Mac would be completely unlikeable if played by anyone other than Josie Totah and Mitchell Hoog. Right now, they are just unlikeable, but could grow as the series goes on.

Devante and Aisha are good and I look forward to their characters being explored more.

Daisy is fine, but I don't think she's a strong enough character to be the "lead". Many reviews have called her the "lead" and the "character viewers follow the most" and I'm not sure the character is strong enough for that. Haskiri Velazquez is capable in her role and is doing fine, but the character is a bit bland at the moment.

Principal Toddman: finally a principal that is trying to make a difference and isn't bumbling around and letting the students get away with anything.

The "running for school president" story felt straight out of the old series, with Lexi and Mac doing it for a parking space. But, I liked that in the end (it was 2 days show time and just 30-something minutes our time) they only let Daisy have the job because they didn't want to give up their spring break - not because they learned any sort of real lesson.

From previews I was a little worried that they might try and go with a Mac/Daisy pairing, and I really glad that it doesn't look that way. Yes, it feels like they might pair them down the road (if the show gets a season 2 and beyond), but for now Daisy seems more annoyed with him and Mac seems indifferent to her. It looks like the show might go with Jamie/Aisha, which could work.

1.02: Clubs and Cliques 

The theater clique is basically so cliché that its amusing. I love that they were all desperate to get Devante involved and keep him in the group chat, but he was just so disinterested. Lexi's line that she would fall for him if he kept ignoring her? Ha.

Jamie's inability to basically function as a normal fifteen/sixteen year old is alarming. The fact that he couldn't tell he is bad at football and that he makes raw food? Like, Jessie, who did you raise? That said, the football team having a "Feelings Helmet" was just amusing to me. The Bayside students are just so over the top insane.

There is a large part of me that wonders what the heck happened in the raising of Mac. Kelly had six siblings. She was raised in a working class family. I can't see her raising her son to be this entitled brat who apparently calls her stupid. And, I honestly can't see Zack allowing his son to end up an idiot who just floats through life.

But, I guess that's the point of the series: the Bayside students are all clichés and over the top archetypes of rich kids. None of them are really all that likeable and I find myself rooting for Devante, Daisy, and Aisha while wanting Mac, Lexi, and Jamie to grow up.

1.03: The Bayside Triangle

Knowing that Jamie and Lexi have been friends since they were little kids and she now has a crush on him and doesn't know how to handle it? Very relatable and makes me like her a bit more. She's right - for a lot of reasons, it can be weird to have an old friend like you.

Aisha trying so hard to fit in with the Bayside students is a bit sad, actually. It feels like she's giving up a part of herself to be who they think she should be.

Mac and Jamie's fight felt like it was straight out of the original series.

It's sad to know that Zack and Slater are no longer friends. I wonder why.

Devante is totally my favorite at this point. He just wants a fresh start and it's sad that Aisha and Daisy suspected him of wrongdoing because of his past.

Again, the fact that the students do all this weird stuff and no one at the school seems to notice or care . . .I feel that is purely making fun of the original show, but I love it.

1.04: The Fabulous Birchwood Boys

Lexi and Devante need to become best friends and stay best friends forever. Let's keep it platonic and fabulous. Also, his friends from his neighbor? I need to see more of those boys.

Jamie and Mac Freshmen year? Dorky as all get out. Lexi's fear that no one would like her. So heartbreakingly real.

Daisy having access to money for one day and becoming an entitled monster...that also felt very real. And, I'm really glad that she didn't take the easy way out and said she was sorry to the other members.

Since Mac never even asked Post Malone and since he got the other kids back - I'm starting to think the kid has more depth and empathy than I originally gave him credit for. That or Daisy is rubbing off on him. If they did Daisy/Mac down the road, I think it could work.

I felt so sorry when Lexi realized that Jamie had asked Aisha. I think they are headed for a Lexi/Jamie/Aisha love triangle, and I have to say that while I see Lexi/Jamie (because of her crush), I don't see Jamie/Aisha just yet.

Finally, Slater obsessing over the gym floors? He really did become a stereotype of a gym coach.

1.05: Rent-A-Mom

Jessie still having anxiety about caffeine and knocking what she thought was caffeine pills away from Mac was great.

Speaking of which - poor Jessie and her marriage. :( How did she end up with such a wishy-washy husband?

Slater and Aisha bonding while trying to making the team tougher was great. I cannot believe Jamie gives heartfelt speeches before games. What the hell, man? They really are pushing Jamie as the "sensitive man-child".

Jamie also mentioned that he was starting to like Aisha, but I still don't really see it. Am I alone in this? A start of a friendship, sure. But, a romance within the next few episodes - that would move too fast. Then again, it is a "teen show" and romance on those tend to move quickly.

Lexi and Mac trying to help Daisy was kind-of sweet in a weird sort of way. I like the looks into the home lives of the gang. It gives us a better understand of who they are as people.

1.06: Teen-Line

DeVante clearly facing racism and even classism at Bayside was really well done. I love that Lexi was ready to help him, because he has become such a great friend to her. Those two have really bonded and I love it.

Mac becoming a payphone, but not realizing it kind of made me smile. But what was even better was the way the school completely went into chaos after the students lost their phones. It couldn't have been more than three hours and the school already looked like a deleted scene from a post-apocalyptic film. Oh, and Mac using the rope to get in and out of the room, while the rest of the group used the door. . .loved it.

Aisha and Jamie. . .I feel like she's with him because he's attractive and sweet. There doesn't seem to be any real depth to their relationship. Though to be fair, there isn't much depth to Jamie's character - he's a satellite love interest to Aisha and Lexi.

1.07: House Party

Lexi finally seeing that she is a good (or at least better) person? I like that she is growing. Out of all the characters, I think she has gotten the most character growth (out of the kids) this season.

So. . .Mac does all his schemes because he's scared of being abandoned by the people he cares about and feels neglected by his parents? It's cliché, but. . .okay.

I'm still not really feeling Aisha/Jamie, but I'm not hating it. The relationship lacks depth, so I'm not terribly invested. But, I'm sure if I went back and watched any of the TNBC shows (without my nostalgic glasses on) those romances won't have much depth either.

Daisy trying to go wild, but instead having to be locked in a closet and making out with a coat? Eh, I get that they were poking fun at the darker and "edgy" teen soaps, but, eh.

Slater really grew during the episode and realized that it's time to leave high school behind and start acting like a real adult, and I'm proud of him.

1.08: The Todd Capsule 

Lark looked amazing. I'm so happy that she is doing so well these days.

So now we know where Screech is: on the Space Station with Kevin the Robot.

I was actually sad to learn that Kelly didn't follow her dream of becoming an actual doctor and is instead selling a fake wellness brand or some nonsense. Though, I will admit the Zack/Kelly scenes had me giggling a bit. They have become so shallow and weird, but I'm living for it. And when Zack said she was the only woman he's ever been with? That was a great jab, at least to me, at the way teen shows always do the "one true pairing" thing.

So glad Jessie now knows that Slater still has feelings for her. Can't believe her husband is having an emotional affair with one of his characters. This show can be so ridiculous.

The time capsule was a great addition to the episode, especially as they remembered all the plots that didn't make sense or were just weird: Jessie's caffeine addiction, putting on a ballet so Zack could graduate, saving a hotel in Hawaii.

How dare the gang (expect Lisa, who is a Queen) not remember Ron-Ron!

I hate - hate - that the PTA basically went behind everyone's back and is going to use the money to send the Douglas children back to their school. Yes, they can use the money to buy new things, but they will still have issues in that school. It's pure racism and classism.

Devante having a crush on Nadia (I think that's her name?) is super cute.

Loved Lexi and Daisy bonding and Lexi seeing that sometimes guilting people into things works just as well as being fake-nice. Though, you think she would have learned that by now.

So, Mac has always struck me as a character that is straight out of a 90s teen sitcom, and he still acts that way. But, I love that the show is trying to show some depth to him: he's acting out for attention from his dad. He has modeled his whole personality after his dad's high school personality in order to get attention. It's a storyline that has been done a million times (and will be done a million more times), but it fits his character.

1.09: All in the Hall

The Douglas principal saying that every few years people try and come in to "save" the school ,but than get bored and leave, because they've already gotten what they want - to feel good about themselves? Yeah, I felt that. It was so true to life, the way people rush into some new cause and than abandon it once they have gotten praise or its no longer trendy.

So happy to see Principal Toddman standing up Jade and sticking up for his students. He and Devante should have more scenes together. I like how they play off one another. I really just love Devante - he's probably my favorite.

Aisha finding a way to stay at the school via sports was very smart, but I can also see how Daisy would see it as selfish. Aisha does have a way of thinking about herself first and than others after. I think that has to do with her ultracompetitive nature - she wants to win, even if it mean leaving others behind.

Jamie got a bit more depth in this episode - finally. It was sweet that he wanted Aisha to stay, despite only having dated her for six weeks or so. He went about it completely wrong, but it was sweet. It's good that he sees that he's more emotionally intelligent than anything else.

The Aisha/Jamie stuff - eh. I never felt it to begin with, so it was no big. I'm glad that they sort of acknowledged that while he loves her, she just likes him and it was a relationship built more on physical attraction and sweet moments than anything else. I mean, they are fifteen.

Mac and Lexi feeling empathy and trying to help Daisy was nice. It's clear that they have both grown to care about Daisy (and Devante and to a lesser degree Aisha). I also enjoyed the small tease of Mac/Lexi with them both agreeing that they would totally hook up, because they are both so hot. Who doesn't love two shallow people admitting they are shallow? Though, I still think the writers are slowly - maybe - setting up something with Mac/Daisy. Maybe. Possibly.

I laughed out loud when Daisy ran into Jean (or is it Dave?) at city hall and he just kept denying that they had met before, but they clearly had.

Daisy's breakdown and her nearly doing drugs and the group hug - complete with Jamie discussing some random talent show we never saw (a jab at the original show airing episodes out of order?) - was just so classic teen sitcom. I loved that they pulled back from that by showing Mac reaching for the joint during the group hug.

1.10: Showdown

Overall the season was much better then I thought it would be and I'm really hoping that they are able to work in a season 2. I don't know if they could do several seasons, but I think they could probably do 2-3 more seasons of 8-10 episodes each. They still have a lot to focus on: relationships, class differences, the fall of the Morris family, Jessie's marriage breaking down and how that plays out with Jamie and even Slater, etc.

I really liked the two throw away lines of: Zack asking "Remember Tori?" and Kelly responding with a confused: "Huh?" and then Kelly quickly telling Mac that his father is not Jeff.

I wouldn't say Zack learned a valuable lesson, so much as he realized that he only wanted to stay Governor because he didn't want to be a loser. Which I guess is a lesson in a way, but he's still a bit of a slime ball.

I'm so glad that Slater told Jessie he was sorry for teasing her in high school because she protested and that he's happy today's teenagers are more willing to speak out about their beliefs. And, I'm even happier that Jessie stood up to her stupid and selfish husband.

Aisha and Daisy ganging up on Devante and than realizing that the clicks at school need a common enemy was great. What was better was Lexi, who has had the most character grown this season, willingly becoming the scapegoat.

Mac still needs to work on his daddy issues, but he's getting there. Hopefully he and his parents can really bond during quarantine.

Jamie telling Lexi that the only reason he wasn't sure if he wanted to date her was because she's been mean in the past was very sweet. Do I think the show is headed for Lexi/Jamie? Yes. Do I think it will last? No.

I still have a feeling that, at some point, they will do a Mac/Daisy pairing. Or at the very least have Mac develop a crush on Daisy, which will be interesting to see.

Other thoughts: I love that the show was able to poke fun at the clichés, corniness, and weirdness of all the late 80s-early 00s teen sitcoms/dramas that people my age grew up on; while at the same time exploring current day issues, without getting too preachy or pushy. They used pop culture well, without it feeling overly done. Someone else has mentioned in several threads that the show reminds them of the show Community, and I have to agree - it really does have an "early" Community vibe to it. I know a lot of shows are being cancelled or not renewed due to Covid, but I really do hope they give this one a second season. I really want to see where they go next.  

Cast List:

Main Haskiri Velazquez as Daisy Jiménez Mitchell Hoog as Mac Morris Josie Totah as Lexi Haddad-DeFabrizio Alycia Pascual-Peña as Aisha Garcia Belmont Cameli as Jamie Spano Dexter Darden as Devante Young John Michael Higgins as Principal Ronald Toddman Elizabeth Berkley Lauren as Jessie Spano Mario Lopez as A.C. Slater

Recurring Mark-Paul Gosselaar as Zack Morris Tiffani Thiessen as Kelly Morris Ed Alonzo as Max Cheyenne Jackson as René

Guest Lark Voorhies as Lisa Turtle

[rpgmgames]

May’s Featured Game: Verloren

DEVELOPER(S): Choko ENGINE: RPG Maker VX Ace GENRE: Horror, Adventure WARNINGS: Flashing images, loud sounds, sudden sounds/images, full list (contains spoilers). SUMMARY: Chris Winter, find himself alone and lost in a black void filled with nothing but coldness. The only warmth you feel comes from your breath. In this void the young boy sees a door filled with light, trying to reach the door only leads to the boy to fall deep into a world filled with nothing but nonsense. Only when you find the key, then you’ll be able to leave.

Download the demo here! Our Interview With The Dev Team Below The Cut!

Introduce yourself! *Choko: Hello, I'm Choko! I'm the developer, artist, and writer for Verloren. I've been messing around with rpg maker since 2013 but finished my first finished game in 2016 which is Desolate Village. I've also made other games since then. Those being Demon Tea, Friend Hunt, and Star Detective. So Verloren isn't my first rodeo in the whole game development stuff, but it is the biggest project I've ever work on so far. Besides game dev stuff, I'm a huge rpg maker games, horror games, rhythm games, and just games with a interesting style to them.

What is your project about? What inspired you to create this game initially? *Choko: Verloren is a horror adventure game that focuses on Chris Winter, a young boy who finds himself alone and far away from home because of this he won't stop for anything to find a way home and learn why did he arrive here. During the course of the game Chris would meet others who have their own goals. What inspired me to make Verloren is a bit hard to say from what I first started to work on it back in 2017, I was mostly trying to work on another project after finishing Desolate Village. It could have been something else but I really forgot. But since I took a huge hiatus year break during 2018, I would personally say the time I actually initially started to work on Verloren was in February of 2019. Since everything was rework with a fresh outlook on everything, so the whole head space with Verloren is totally different from 2017-2018. What inspired me when I went back to rebuild/fix the game was friends, since their support made me feel I could go back to work on the game. During 2018 I would say I wasn't in the best mood while working on the game, so the support my friends gave me really helped a lot and encouraged me.

How long did you work on your project? *Choko: I've been working on Verloren for three years now. But will say 2019 to now is when actually development started/actually got going. 2018 I took the whole year off to cool down/chill. So the Verloren of 2017-2018 is very different from the Verloren of 2019 to now. If that makes sense....

Did any other games or media influence aspects of your project? *Choko: Oh boy, this section might be very long since there's a lot of games and media which inspired/ influences Verloren, though for many different reasons. Will say the two rpg maker games that inspire me a whole lot when it comes to everything they do is Mare and Akademia (I know it's just a demo still at the time writing but it's very good. Good demo, like the characters are great!! Everything is very nice!) Other rpg maker games do inspire me, mainly friend stuff but Mare and Akademia are two games I really love and wish I can make Verloren a game which has characters which feel realistic in a way they do. Like please go play them. Besides rpg maker games will say that NieR Automata, Okage: Shadow King, RE 1/RE 0, Deemo, Rule of Rose, Smile For Me, and the Kirby series are games that just really inspire me with Verloren, there's just certain aspects of them which I hope I can capture in Verloren. Other than video games, I do get a bunch of inspiration from artist I follow, comics/manga, and anime though if I mention all of them it would just lead me to ramble away, but will say Pandora Hearts and Death Parade are two series I really love and both. I just enjoy series that shows character interaction and bonds, because that's a main part in Verloren. I really just get inspire by character development if you couldn't tell..... ^^;

Have you come across any challenges during development? How did you overcome or work around them? *Choko: Besides the 2018 thing I mention earlier. There has been tiny bits of challenges, like with creating maps, since it takes me a while to get into the mood to make them, but wouldn't really call it a challenge. Since all the time I just have to take time away from the map to gain motivation to make them. Another challenge I guess would be writing cut scenes which I love, though it's a whole process of making sure the characters aren't just rambling or going off-topic since when I write I tend to get in character, as in voice act the lines or try to think how they would. Though the process isn't really a bad challenge since it just takes a while until I get it right.

Have any aspects of your project changed over time? How does your current project differ from your initial concept? *Choko: There's been soooooo many changes to this game. The biggest change I would say is the characters, they had a lot of design changes and personality/motivation changes. But other than that, I would say the mood of the game change a lot, also how scenes play it, originally it just felt like stuff happen to happen. Now it makes a lot more sense and isn't just some random thing I added. Sadly I can't list everything that change because that's spoilers but trust me everything change for the better.

What was your team like at the beginning? How did people join the team? If you don’t have a team, do you wish you had one or do you prefer working alone? *Choko: At the beginning there wasn't a team, since I wanted to do everything solo. I mostly enjoy doing art, writing, and eventing the game. Though currently now there is a team, mostly with people I know, it's more so just a critique/feedback team + voice actors. Currently there are only two VAs since I didn't want to focus on voice acting before I had most of the game done, in the far future I may make a post about it. But so far the whole team is more so just a chilling area then anything else and I enjoy all the fun talk that happen there.

What is the best part of developing a game? *Choko: The best part of creating a game is to see the characters you created come to life. I just really enjoy seeing everything come together. Idk I just find it cool that when making a game all starts out as concepts/ ideas and then after days/weeks/months of work it becomes a actually thing you can look at and show others. Most cutscenes in Verloren I get super happy when I finish them up, because I can see them as a real thing rather than a bunch of ideas of "this is what I'm going to do". Also the joke/shitpost memes....they are also the best part of making a game.

Do you find yourself playing other RPG Maker games to see what you can do with the engine, or do you prefer to do your own thing? *Choko: Yep!!! I play a lot of rpg maker games, I really enjoy seeing what other people do. I just find it cool that anyone can pick up the engine and learn how to use it. Also it's a fun way to find inspiration, just seeing other rpg maker games and being like ">:O I didn't know you can do that!!!".

Which character in your game do you relate to the most and why? (Alternatively: Who is your favorite character and why?) *Choko: This question is very hard, mainly because I relate to because a lot of characters in the game I relate to in tiny levels. For my favorite character it's Vladimir....I do like every other character in game. Chris is my second favorite I have to say (kinda a lie since ties with another character) but Vladimir number one, he's just soo much fun to write. He's maybe the one character who has a lot of scenes which gets a huge smile from me.

Looking back now, is there anything that regret/wish you had done differently? *Choko: Not really, mainly since I was lucky to be able to take a huge hiatus which help me in 2019 to rework everything. So every problem I had with the game I fixed.

Do you plan to explore the game’s universe and characters further in subsequent projects, or leave it as-is? *Choko: I would just leave the game alone after I finish Verloren, it's a game that doesn't need any follow ups because I feel it would just take away from the impact when you get to the end. There really isn't anything I would need to explore, since Verloren is meant to be a single game and that's it.

What do you most look forward to upon finishing the game? *Choko: I look forward seeing how people react to the full game, I am low key shock on how people are reacting towards the demo and all the tiny predictions/speculations. Also the warm positive feedback towards Vladimir is shocking, since I thought no one would like him because of all those jokes/puns. I hope the final game has the same positive reaction, also that other characters get a warm positive feedback towards them.

Was there something you were afraid of concerning the development or the release of your game? *Choko: The only thing that worries me is that if I mess up and people can't understand reasons why x character did that. Since one of the main things with Verloren is that characters have their own way if viewing stuff. Like morality is pretty gray because I don't want to write a black and white story.

Do you have any advice for upcoming devs? *Choko: Main advice I'll give out is placeholders are your friend. Don't spend time making assets for a system you didn't test and you test it and it doesn't work. Just have a placeholder graphic which helps you test it and when it's done you can always slap on the asset. Following up with this, create a debug room. It would come in handy to test systems/ events than having to play through your game to test it and learn you need to fix it.

Question from last month's featured dev @cheesesteak-horror: Do you have creative processes you practice before starting development? *Choko: No, not really. I often just jump right into development and go from there. Most of my practice come from when I work on small stuff or just when I'm bored I often just mess around with things.

We mods would like to thank Choko for agreeing to our interview! We believe that featuring the developer and their creative process is just as important as featuring the final product. Hopefully this Q&A segment has been an entertaining and insightful experience for everyone involved!

Remember to check out Verloren if you haven’t already! See you next month! 

- Mods Gold & Platinum

[ask-the-wordsmith]

hello!!! you're really talented at roleplaying on tumblr and i was wondering if you had any tips on how to write for rps and just generally how to get started if you havent really done it before! thanks so much, ur very cool!!

OHHHH thank you so much for asking!! no seriously, thanks for asking, I’m in a bit of an original-content slump so I will grab any chance to talk about RP and feel better about myself—

First off, I have a writing tag on my most well-known RP blog (percival-queen) with a few posts that might be worth the read if you can get past my rambles. There’s quite a few on getting a RP blog started, at least (things like making icons and whatnot). #[ 2 feathered quills - writing advice ]

But, that’s boring to me, so I’m not gonna rehash any of it! Writing tips below the cut!

The very basics

“Yes, and!” Basically, never negate anything your partner says! And I don’t mean your muse can’t say no to something. I mean YOU, as the narrator, should never change something your partner establishes, even if it’s not what you had planned. Jello gives the funniest and best example of this on an episode of Tip Of The Tongue, where is one guy says “hey dude, pass me the soda!” and the other replies, “there’s no soda! WE’RE ON THE MOON!” ...Yeah. Don’t do that.

Don’t godmod. This is what makes the rule above work. Remember that in role-play, you can only 100% control YOUR muse’s actions. You have 0% control over your partner’s actions: try not to assume even little things, like that they’ll accept a handshake. The world around your muses (such as minor NPCs, weather, and other events neither muse caused) might be a 50-50% split, or one person might have more control than the other— but unless you and your partner really click, it might be best to communicate about this number beforehand. Which reminds me!

Communicate OOC. The amount in which you have to do this varies depending on the length/importance of the thread and how chill your partners are. Goldbricker-ramsey and I almost never planned past the setup (“hey can my muse show up at your muses’s doorstep on the verge of fainting” “YES! ...do you know why?” “nah I’ll figure it out later” “OKAY!”), but donutbadge likes to discuss at least the outline of the entire plot before starting. Everyone is different! Figuring out how much you need to communicate is the first step of communication.

Slightly less basic basics

Conflict is good. In all writing, but ESPECIALLY role-play. Note that this does NOT mean every thread has to have conflict— but something I notice a lot of beginning role-players do is that they (usually subconsciously) avoid any kind of rude/mean/conflict-inducing behavior because it makes them uncomfortable. They feel like they’re doing something wrong. But conflict, whether life-threatening or just siblings yelling at each other, is often the source of the most interesting threads, and can even lead to the best fluff further down the line! This is where OOC communication can come in handy, if you feel nervous about your muse doing something that you wouldn’t do.

*disclaimer for the advice above: do communicate OOC if you’re going to have any “heavy/mature” conflict, or even heavy/mature themes in your thread. If it’s the sort of stuff that needs to be tagged for triggers, you MUST ask your partner about it first.

Remember your character basics. I know this feels like it shouldn’t even need to be said on the list, but it’s insane how much I see this just... not happen. With villains, it might tie into the whole “avoiding conflict” thing, but it’s not villain-exclusive. If your muse’s DEFINING PERSONALITY TRAIT is being a hothead who’s easily ticked off, don’t have them immediately forgive the random guy who bumped into them on the street! I think “nice” muses tend to be easier to play because less people are inclined to make a nice character act mean (unless it’s in the context of a joke or crackpost, and ofc those are fine).

Look for contrasts. With same-world characters and new interactions alike, searching for evident contrasts can get past the awkward “hello my name is x what is your name how do you do” stuff and into the actually interesting dynamics. Contrasts can be anything from “one muse is a farmer and the other is a city boy” to “one muse a pacifist sweetheart and the other is literally a murderer.” Once you’ve found your contrast, look for an excuse to bring it up in IC conversation and let the fun begin! (A classic trope if you want a less-serious thread is one muse not knowing or misunderstanding something, e.x. “hey look a pizzeria!”��“a what now?” “YOU’VE NEVER TRIED PIZZA?!?”)

Look for similarities. Contrasts are sometimes harder to find but easier to make threads out of. Similarities are easier to find but less interesting most of the time, so try looking for the unexpected similarities between your muses! Do they have similar backstories? Personalities? Especially if it’s something you’ve never seen explored before, find a reason to bring it up and let the Bonding Moments (TM) happen.

Make strong choices. ...when it’s in-character, of course. Some muses really are just Chill and that’s kinda their Thing, but 99% of them are super expressive— because, guess what, those characters are the best ones for writing, whether in RP or prose! If you have a decision, but it seems kind of boring, go back to your character basics and see if there’s anything you can use to make it stronger.

If a partner muse asks your muse to dance, you know what’d be the most boring answer? “Sure.” Unless you’re part of the 1% of muses that would do Exactly That, you know what would be more interesting? “HECK YEAH!” or “I thought you'd never ask!” or “Really? You’re sure you want to dance with me?!” or... pretty much anything!

The same can even be said when the choice is negative. You know what else is a boring answer to being asked to dance? “No thanks.” Again: unless you’re RPing as the 1%, please, PLEASE give your answer more flavor. “Not in a million years, you shallow jerk!” or “No... I’m sure I’d just step on your feet and get in the way...” or “N-no way, b-baka!” or “(*PANICKED SCREAMING, RUNS AWAY, TRIPS ON THE STAIRCASE, AND DROPS A GLASS SHOE AS THEY FUMBLE WITH THEIR HAIR*)” are all more interesting than the first response.

Get used to feeling out endings. This might take some practice, but what I mean is, try to be aware when you’re reaching the natural conclusion of a thread. A lot of threads just kinda lose momentum and die out, sometimes without even an official end, and while that’s okay (role-play is supposed to be relaxing and for fun!), it’s MORE satisfying to have a thread wrapped up with a nice neat bow. For threads that have conflict in them, the ending should be shortly after the resolution of the conflict— whether good or bad. For non-conflict threads (the ones that read like domestic fics), a good ending is for the characters to finish whatever they’re doing— eating a meal, going shopping, whatever— and wrapping up their conversation at the same time.

There are of course a billion variations on ending threads, and I could probably make a whole post dedicated to the subject, but for now I think this ramble is plenty!

[akindofmagictoo]

liebster award

thank you so much @rhyaxxyn for the nomination! I’m sorry this is late but I’m so honoured!! ❤️ 

rules: thank the blogger that nominated you. Answer the 11 questions the blogger asked you. nominate 11 bloggers. ask your nominees 11 questions. notify your 11 nominees. let’s begin!!!

1. If you could be anything or anyone in your story, what would you be?

oof. I think I’d enjoy being one of the Hurricane women... because lady pirates with a lovely found family bond. and they fight old rich white men who have more money than they need. sign me up. (realistically I would be landlubber Theo... but a girl can dream.) 

2. Has your writing made you want to explore another culture or heritage more in depth?

um. somewhat? I haven’t done a lot of this, honestly, but I think it would be quite nice to! 

3. How excited do you get about a new wip idea when it comes to you? How long does that excitement last for?

very excited. the last one was my dragon/knight WIP, about two months ago... the excitement has only just started to wear off. and I’m still excited about Hurricane. I love learning about my characters, writing, posting about it... all that jazz. I just love it. 

4. If you could tell your fledgling writer self anything about the journey has brought you on, what would you tell them?

uhh don’t outline in too much detail but plan out each scene not every line of dialogue. and practice really does make perfect — Hurricane is gonna turn out better than you can imagine and you’ll find even more fun WIP ideas! 

5. What is the most random thing in your everyday life that has inspired you? (could be something like a cat, a text, etc.)

the dragon WIP was inspired by a stuffed dragon and a conversation that occurred while I was too half-asleep to have even opened my eyes yet. that’s pretty random. 

6. What was the moment where writing just clicked for you? Was it a continuous thing, or was their a single big moment that has brought you thus far?

there was a beautiful moment one time where I figured out the change I needed to make to fix literally every single problem I’d been having with Hurricane up to that point. that sparked draft 2 and I haven’t looked back since. 

7. If your characters had the ability to shift into any animal, what animal would they be? This could be creatures you’ve created in your stories too!

hmm. I think Aella would be a really jumpy social dog, like a golden retriever, and I can also imagine her as a mermaid! Theo is more like a cat curling up in the sunlight, and Tempest is probably like a bear (fierce but very protective of her kids). 

8. Who’s the mom friend of your characters/the voice of reason that keeps everyone else from dying?

Aria. Also Theo but Aria is more insistent; Theo is more likely to back down if ignored. if Aria seriously thinks something is a bad idea it is not happening. 

9. Who’s the dad friend that agrees with the mom friend right up until they turn away and they’re taking all the other characters to do the dangerous thing?

probably Tempest, tbh, depending on the dangerous thing. if something dangerous has to be happening, Tempest will do it. better her than the rest of her crew, too. 

10. What is the character duo that has to stay in the “get along shirt” for the entire day after a fight?

the crew of the Hurricane don’t really fight a lot, tbh. maybe Sequoia and Emmy? they’re probably among the more volatile. I really don’t know though. 

11. Which of your characters do you think would give you the best hug? Like the sort of hug that almost makes you feel like you could cry nice?

Theo gives good hugs because he’s Tol and runs warm, but I think Tempest’s hugs would be the BEST. she’s not as tall as Theo but she’s broader and stronger, and I think her hugs would just be super firm and strong and just make you feel so so so safe 🥺

like Theo’s hugs are good for a feeling of safety too because he’s really chill and kind but Tempest’s hugs make you feel like nothing can touch you because she will fight it. and just. 

hold on a second. I need a moment. 

okay now that I’ve collected myself: 

my nominees (questions under the cut) 

@zmlorenz @writingbyjillian @isherwoodj @klywrites @writeremma @lottieiswriting @writingonesdreams @quilloftheclouds @viawrites-andacts @ravens-and-rivers @ardawyn !! you all are great!! 

questions for my nominees: 

what is your favourite thing to write about? characters? world? plot? something else? why? 

do you prefer to work on one WIP at a time or multiple? 

what is your favourite music to listen to while you write? 

is there a character from your WIP/s that you think you’d be besties with? who? 

how do you come up with titles for your WIPs? 

where do you do your writing? particular software? notebooks? 

is there a particular place you need to be to write? any other caveats like music, tea, etc.? 

do you categorise your characters? hogwarts houses, mbti (not imdb which I wanted to type just now...), cinnamon roll meme... etc. 

who’s your favourite of your characters? 

do you prefer to focus more on character aesthetic/appearance or more internal stuff? 

do you write AUs of your characters? 

[shirokodomo]

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE; Mun & Muse - Meme.

THE MUSE - Hakudoshi (Inuyasha)

THE MUN - Eleanor / Ellie / El

Fill out & repost! This meme definitely favors canons more, but I hope OC’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multi-Muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

My muse is: Canon / OC / AU / Canon-divergent / Fandomless.

It's a mix of these three, the character itself is canon but I have a bunch of AUs and Canon Divergents verses although I also write him within his Canon Verse

Is your character popular in the fandom? YES / NO.

Is your character considered hot™ in the fandom? YES / NO.

Is your character considered strong in the fandom? YES / NO.

I am not sure how the fandom views him in this regard, while he is one of the strongest incarnations, he isn't even on the level of either Inuyasha or Sesshomaru. So, kinda I guess?

Are they underrated? YES / NO.

Were they relevant for the main story? YES / NO.

To the story as a whole no, but he was relevant during a few arcs because of his connection to Naraku and the works he was sent to do.

Are they widely known in their world? YES / NO.

How’s their reputation? GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL.

How strictly do you follow canon?

Depends on the characters he is interacting with. With the main group (Inu & Co.) and with the other incarnations with whom he has interacted in canon material (Kanna, Kagura, The Infant) I pretty much stick it to canon as much as I can, though I have my own interpretation of his character in certain stuff.

But there are characters he never met or barely interacted with in canon (Koga, Kikyo, Sesshomaru, etc) so in these I go overboard and mostly "ignore" canon, and let my own imagination interpret how their interactions would go, while trying to keep him as the villain he is but without making the interactions short or boring.

Then I have a bunch of AUs and Canon Divergent verses which I love to dive in and allows me to stray away from canon for the most part (i.e: he doesn't die, he doesn't betray Naraku, etc). Two of my favorite Canon Divergent threads are those where he ends up traveling with Sesshomaru after escaping from Naraku or the one where a mother-son bond slowly forms between him and Kikyo.

SELL YOUR MUSE! Aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals.

He is a child and a child can still change his personality a lot even if they started out as a villain.

He is very intelligent, knows how to take precautions if/when things go wrong. In my opinion that makes him a good ally as much as it makes him a dangerous antagonist.

Canon didn't explore many sides of him and I'm more than willing to do that so plotting with me can become fun, even if some ideas might sound weird.

Although he was initially one of Naraku's most loyal incarnations and followed his orders, he can be self-serving (and in my eyes that's a good and bad thing) and can choose to take a different path from the initial plan even if that goes against his creator's goal and ends up benefiting the "good guys"

Now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?)

He is a villain and villains can be a little hard to handle and to create long threads with, without making it sound repetitive.

He can be quite creepy and perhaps a little annoying.

He has no qualms in his actions, doesn't possess empathy, doesn't care how many people were hurt or killed by his actions.

He is manipulative, although not as much as his creator, and more than capable of betrayal. Trusting him can be quite difficult especially after everything he did.

What inspired you to RP your muse?

Hakudoshi was always my favorite in the entire series, don't ask why, he just was, for some reason I was always drawn to him everytime he was on screen. His personality though sometimes difficult to portray can be interesting to explore, especially when aside from the fact that he is evil, there weren't any other sides of him shown which leaves a bunch of open doors for interpretation.

What keeps your inspiration going?

Dreams, random ideas and of course the other roleplayers I have interacted with so far.

Some more personal questions for the mun.

Give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

While I am aware that I have choose to portray a villain, I enjoy to try and step a bit out of the typical "I hate you and you hate me" troop when it comes to interactions with the "good guys", not saying that we shouldn't portray that, we definitely SHOULD because he has hurt many people and I don't expect other Muses to suddenly get along with mine but all I want is to try and step a bit more out of it so that we can create an interesting and enjoyable thread together.

An example I like to use for this, within the canon verse, is two threads I currently have with two different Inuyasha muses, in which we created an interesting set up for Inuyasha and Hakudoshi to interact, one that keeps the threads on-going smoothly, while keeping the obvious fact neither can stand the other because that's how their relationship is.

Do you think you give your character justice? YES / NO.

Depends on my mood and depends on the thread. There are many times I wonder if I'm making him "evil enough" or if I'm making him OOC.

Do you frequently write headcanons? YES / NO.

Do you sometimes write drabbles? YES / NO. But I am thinking of doing a prompt thing once a month for that! To help me with my writing skills.

Do you think a lot about your muse during the day? YES / NO.

Are you confident in your portrayal? YES / NO. 

There are times I doubt it, other times I'm good with it.

Are you confident in your writing? YES / NO.

Are you a sensitive person? YES / NO.

Do you accept criticism well about your portrayal?

I'm open to constructive criticism all the time. 

Being plain rude however it's a no for me.

Do you like questions, which help you explore your character?

I LOVE getting asks, they help me not just build my portrayal of the Muse but also provides me with many headcanon ideas.

If someone disagrees with your portrayal, how would you take it?

As I wrote above there are times I doubt my portrayal and also I am open to constructive criticism, so if someone disagrees with my portrayal I am more than open to receive tips on how I could get better.

Disagreeing with my portrayal just to be plain rude though, I'll pass. I don't want drama and I've created this RP blog to have fun and to escape a little from the problems in real life.

If someone really hates your character, how do you take it?

Eh I'm fine with it? Hakudoshi is a villain and a secondary character, I won't expect everyone to like him and I respect that. I just ask others to equally respect my liking for this character.

Are you okay with people pointing out your grammatical errors?

Yes I am, again I'm full open to constructive criticism. While I feel quite comfortable with my English, it's not my first language so errors are bound to happen.

Do you think you are easy going as a mun?

I am very shy and not exactly a big social butterfly, however I do like to talk to others that love the series/characters/etc as much as I do so DMs and Discord are open for that stuff too, not just plotting!

Tagged by: No one, found this on a random blog in the search

Tagging: @silverhanyou @windcarnation @konosesshomaru and anyone else who feels like doing this.

[barisifictionarchive]

Author: sarahcakes613

Preferred Name: sarah

Have any events in your personal life ever influenced the things that you've written? 

Oh 100% - I often write little moments and experiences from my life into my characters lives. It's usually the silly stuff, I try not to let my traumas influence my writing because that's depressing af and I don't like writing angst!

That being said, my only chapfic to date is a Game of Thrones story about sobriety and recovery, and the idea came to me while I was sitting in a church basement watching someone I love receive a multiyear sobriety medallion. That story pulled a lot of it's core dialogue and traits from this person in my life and was largely inspired by the pride and love I feel for addicts in recovery.

Do you have a favorite movie? 

I love visually strong storytelling, so the Lord of the Rings trilogy is up there. I also love Mel Brooks comedies, especially Blazing Saddles and Robin Hood Men in Tights.

Who is your favorite author? 

Leonard Cohen only wrote two novels in his life but they're both perfect examples of their genres. In recent years, I've become a huge fan of Cat Sebastian, her queer regency romances are absolutely charming feel-good bites of chocolate.

How did you start getting involved in fanfiction?

I've been reading it since high school, but never felt like I had a fandom story of my own to tell. In 2015, I was heavily involved in the Game of Thrones fandom on Tumblr, particularly for the ship Sansan (Sandor Clegane/Sansa Stark) and began participating in the occasional drabble/prompt challenge just for fun. In 2016, a bunch of us decided to collaborate on a supremely cracky circus AU. I'd already written a handful of things but that was when my interest in writing fic took off. And the ladies I met writing that are still some of my absolute best friends!

How did you get involved with Barisi?

It was VERY roundabout. I watched SVU on occasion back when I had cable and I do remember watching both Barba and Sonny, but nothing about them stuck out to me in terms of shipping, probably because SVU was always a pretty casual watch for me so I never looked at it with fandom goggles. I got really into Raul Esparza's voice over this past winter (I have no idea what triggered that interest, probably a random Youtube find) so occasionally in searching I would see SVU gifsets on Tumblr and was like ah yes, I remember them, but again, never really stuck in my mind.

Meanwhile, sometimes when I'm looking for a new read, I'll choose a tag at random and just scroll for something that looks interesting. This past February I somehow wound up in the tag for Konmari/Marie Kondo, and found the fic Tidying Up by Robin Hood (kjack89). I thought it was absolutely the sweetest dang thing and started adding more Barisi fic to my marked-for-later page. Then in March, I actually started going through them and in one month I read about 200 stories.

What inspires you to write? 

The Barisi fandom is easily the most inspiring group of people I've ever talked to, with all the back and forth on Twitter with ideas and music and gifsets and headcanons, it all sparks ideas! Music especially, I'll see a whole story play out in my head over the course of a four minute song. I'm also often inspired by an aesthetic image, I'll see a pretty photo and want to write an entire story based around it.

What is your favorite fic that you have written? 

Oh my god Karen you can't just ask someone what their favourite fic they've written is. There are definitely multiple answers.

The fic I'm proudest of is Gods Grant Me the Serenity, the Game of Thrones chapfic I mentioned - it's "only" 20k but it took me 3 years to write because it was sometimes so painful to explore that relationship.

I also really love a gen/non-ship fic I wrote called The Holy or the Broken, which is a series of vignettes that explores each of the Avengers and their relationship to their own Jewish faith. Because all the Avengers are Jewish. I said so, and therefore it's true. I loved exploring aspects of my faith through fic, and the response was extremely gratifying.

My favourite Barisi fic that I have written is "I'll use you as a focal point (so I don't lose sight of what I want)" because it's the first one I wrote. When I first started exploring Barisi, I found the Archive on Tumblr and had a look at the prompt page. I saw one that really spoke to me but I was reluctant to do anything with it, because I was like, do I really want to start writing for a totally new fandom that I'm only just barely in? But then I went for it, and I haven't looked back!

What is your favorite quote from a fic of yours?

Oh man, you expect me to remember what I wrote?? The cheesy answer is all of it is my favourite, because I'm actually quite proud of my writing.

This may not be my #1 favourite, but it's definitely one that stands out, from my Barisi story Perfect situations must go wrong:

"Don’t you get it, Rafi?” Sonny asks, his voice so low it’s almost a whisper. “A life bond like ours, it’s a living thing. The beginning of our story is just that, a beginning. We chose the steps that came after. How can you say none of that was real?"

What is your personal favorite fanfic? (Can be any fandom)

OOF. In Barisi, well, I did just post two whole full rec bingo cards on Twitter, so I have a LOT of faves, but A Healing Year by anni_scovill is one of my favourite fics of all time, Barisi or otherwise. Throwing it back to other fandoms, the story Kiss the Girl by Jillypups is the definitive Game of Thrones modern AU Sansan. It's also the origin of the tag you've almost definitely seen floating around, "tale as old as time, burn as slow as fuck". I'm not a big fan of kidfic but Jillypups wrote a really engaging and realistic original child character who steals the show in every scene she is in.I have a few other favourites in other fandoms, some a little spicier than others. I can rec fic all day long, to be honest! If anyone ever wants recs outside Barisi in Supernatural, Teen Wolf, Game of Thrones, or Marvel, my DMs are always open!!

Anything else you would like to add? 

I'm extraordinarily honoured to have been asked to do this. I've been a published Barisi author for just under three months and in that time I've already written 50k words over 27 stories. I have 32 stories in the Game of Thrones tag and that is after six YEARS in the fandom. When I say you all are the most inspiring and motivational bunch, oh boy do I mean it!

A question you’d like to ask another author?

When I finally finished Gods Grant Me the Serenity, I swore I'd never write another chapfic, or at least never begin posting one until the entire thing was done. How do you keep yourself motivated to keep updating ongoing fics? How far in advance do you plot/plan? Tell me all your secrets for being a successful chapfic writer!!

[goblins-riddles-or-frocks]

Moffat Dracula Review

Plot Summary For People Who Don’t Want To Watch It:

Dracula corners Jonathan, Mina, and Sister Agatha Van Helsing in a secluded convent in Budapest following Jonathan’s escape from his castle. The castle sequence itself is explained in flashback as Jonathan recounts his experience, leading up to the realization that he himself had died during his stay there. 

Realizing he’s now become some form of undead creature, he attempts to kill himself via a stake but is unsuccessful. Despairing at this, he invites Dracula inside the convent in exchange for a true death.  Agatha and Mina are able to stay safe within a circle of sacramental bread but everyone else is massacred. 

When Mina sees Dracula disguised as Jonathan approaching them, she invites him inside the circle. He of course reveals his identity immediately after. Agatha bargains her own life for Mina’s, so Dracula allows the other girl to go free.

Some time later, Dracula sets sail for England aboard the Demeter, a Russian ship with a strangely high number of wealthy passengers and a bluebeard’s cabin no one is allowed to enter. He quickly picks off the passengers one by one, meanwhile himself leading the effort to find the murderer onboard. 

This culminates in the remaining passengers finally searching the ship— and the mysterious cabin which is revealed to have been hiding a sickly Sister Agatha inside. She explains that Dracula is a vampire and together with the passengers they attempt to kill him by setting him on fire. But it is unsuccessful. Agatha urges everyone to escape on lifeboats because she intends to blow up the ship with her and Dracula in it before it is able to reach England. 

Dracula does not die but remains dormant under water. He reaches Whitby roughly 100 years later and is immediately captured by the Jonathan Harker foundation, lead by Agatha’s descendant Dr Zoe Van Helsing. He leaves captivity fairly quickly however with the help of Frank Renfield— a lawyer he hired over skype. 

Zoe is revealed to be dying of cancer. Dracula offers her his blood to heal her but it doesn’t seem to work. It instead gives her a bond to communicate with her dead ancestor Agatha, which gives her more insight about the vampire. 

Meanwhile, Dracula begins preying on Lucy Westenra, a young socialite. Despite leading a seemingly perfect life, she is wholly apathetic and disgruntled with her situation. She allows him to feed on her in exchange for the high a vampire’s bite can give her. He attempts to turn her into a vampire but she’s burned horribly once she’s cremated following her funeral.

Her death leads Zoe and Jack Seward to where Dracula has been staying. During their confrontation however Lucy returns, and after learning about her appearance, begs Jack to kill her, which he does. 

Zoe asks Jack to leave so she may speak to Dracula alone. She surmises that all of Dracula’s weaknesses are actually ineffective. The only thing he fears is death, and humanity’s willingness to die, She then... resolves to sit down and die right there. But at the last moment Dracula drinks her cancerous blood which should in turn kill him... they make out while dying... The end?

If that sounds like it makes no sense, it’s because it doesn’t. 

Final Thoughts:

The plot was nonsensical and the pacing was very poor and completely unstructured. The story itself bore little to no resemblance to Dracula at all, to the point where I wonder why they even bothered to keep the names. 

Most of the characters were new, and the few that were ported over from the Stoker novel had hardly anything in common with their original versions, Dracula included. 

Jonathan was the most in character of the bunch, if he was fairly more genre savvy while stuck in Dracula’s castle. Mina’s characterization seemed to be confined to a single flirtatious letter, an endless well of trust for Jonathan, and constant sobbing. She was more of a liability than anything else. 

Agatha served the role of a genderbent Van Helsing, though her manner was entirely lifted from the Coppola film. This could’ve been very cool if they hadn’t randomly made her a nun without actually committing to it at all. She was not really portrayed as having any actual lived experience as a nun in the victorian era. And faith as a concept was only touched on for her to dismiss— hilariously casually given her position.  

I think the actress’s performance was fairly decent, and she def grew on me in the second episode when she’s not actually in a convent to constantly remind us how dissonant of a nun she is. But it would’ve been nice if they would’ve either committed to actually making her a nun, (a legit vampire hunting nun could be so cool!) or just abandoning the concept altogether. Because the way it was presented just felt like window dressing. 

Also I’m not normally averse to shipping Van Helsing/Dracula but having to genderbend one of the two just to do it is like... hm. Also the weird tension they had going on was very badly executed in general. 

Speaking of Dracula, he had to be the weakest part of the show. He was written in the smuggest, most infuriating way possible. And it might have worked with another actor but this dude just did not have any gravitas or stage presence whatsoever. And it certainly was not helped by the fact that his costuming and makeup were so fucking lackluster. 

Despite being the linchpin of the story, he had no goals nor any particular drive. He was just out there doing Stuff for Reasons and none of them were compelling. It seemed like he was just killing to kill and the writing was not good enough to actually carry any of the vague themes about how he’s looking for new brides (why?) how he’s searching for a The Perfect Fruit (what???) or anything at all really. He had no depth whatsoever beneath his stupid quips and self-satisfied demeanor. 

There was an interesting implication that he needed to choose who he drinks carefully in order to maintain his own personality/sanity/sentience and that without blood he’d… apparently just become like any of the zombies we saw in the show. And that is such a cool concept! But it was not really  explored, nor was it written all that well. Even though it could’ve been (and I think was maybe intended to be???) an excellent source of existential dread! 

But yes, in general there was hardly any depth to this show. They played almost every possible card they could for shock value, and included many unnecessary and frankly underwhelming esoteric concepts that went nowhere. There was so much gore and random effects. We had zombies, vampire infants, and Dracula legit wearing people’s skins. The lore didn’t make any sense either, apparently people just… being unable to die despite their body’s so called death is a common occurrence? It wasn’t clear whether Dracula even had much control over who he changes and whether or not they become proper vampires. The entire thing just seemed poorly thought out. 

There were a lot of easter eggs and references to previous Dracula adaptations (and even some unrelated vampire media). I definitely noticed nods to the Hammer Horror movies and the Lugosi film, which was fun. The biggest noticeable influence however would have to be the 1992 Coppola movie. I have never seen a show try so hard to be another movie lmao. They even went so far as to make a spiritual successor to the film’s main theme that’s about as close as you could probably get without actually licensing the music. 

However, while the Coppola film at least had skill with regards to the costuming and cinematography to carry its aesthetic, this show simply did not. The costumes, the makeup, and the special effects were all lackluster. The set was nice enough but was not shot in a way to really leave much of an impression. 

The first episode was abysmal— mainly due to Dracula’s awful performance (those disgusting fungus covered fake nails, that age makeup, that ACCENT) and the entire awkward af scene where he terrorizes a convent of nuns while naked and covered in blood. But it was at least so bad it was funny.

The second episode was the most tedious to me because it was less offensively awful so I couldn’t even enjoy the badness. There was definitely a sharp uptick of quality whenever Dracula was offscreen for any notable amount of time though. The passengers were rather boring but I liked the crewmen. And Agatha honestly killed it for the latter half. 

The last episode was by far the worst and yet the most entertaining because they just stopped trying at that point. 

Renfield was amazing and an absolute delight every time he was on screen. Dracula found him over skype for God’s sake, how can that not be fantastic? He actually utters the words “Dracula has rights,” and his argument somehow actually fucking works.  

And even Dracula himself was far less insufferable with the shift in dynamics. By being forced to cope with the modern world, he could no longer act like such a smarmy, self-assured know it all. Seeing him freak the fuck out at the sight of helicopters was genuinely fun. 

Lucy’s handling was misogynistic af though. It was bafflingly, needlessly awful. And the way she was vilified at the very end was appalling. They almost had an interesting deconstruction wrt her utter malaise for her life, and the implication that she actually resents her beauty. But then of course she gets burned alive, and then is treated horribly for it by the protagonists. 

Even though it’s clear she has no idea what’s happened to her body, Zoe doesn’t even bother to explain it to her. She just makes her take a selfie of all things so she can see what she really looks like. It didn’t seem like the show had a shred of sympathy for her, because “oh, clearly she was a narcissistic bitch and she deserved what she got” or something like that?? 

The utter indifference everyone has to her death is baffling. It was an afterthought, that seemed like its only purpose for existing was yet again just shock value. The scene, after her death, immediately shifting the focus back to whatever weird personal rivalry that borders on sexual tension  Agatha/Zoe and Dracula have going on.  

But all in all, this adaptation had me baffled, frustrated, and cringing through most of it. It was unintentionally funny quite often and I honestly enjoyed it, but for all the wrong reasons. I highly recommend it to anyone who wants to melt their fucking brain.

[kanene-yaaay]

It started when...

Kanene’s note: Aaaa, okay! This little guy here give me some trouble and I had to re-write it some times but I really liked the ideia, so my butter heart didn’t let me to dig it in some deep archive of my computer, soooo…

Here he is!! Is a boy fluff! xDD

Well, at first it was suppose to be a OC fanfic, but then I felt some urge to made a Logan liking tickling and I think I didn't captured his personality very well xD. However, I really loved the result! Hope you enjoy this as well!!!

Warnings, fun facts, random things and stuff:

* This characters don’t belongs to me! They all belongs to Thomas Sanders! Yaaay!

* This is a SFW Tickle-fic, so, if you don’t appreciate this kind of content, please, look for another arts. There are a lot of wonderful arts in this site!!  ^w^)b

* Something around 4000 words. -w-)b.

* Sorry for any spelling, pontuation and grammar mistakes! Any and every advice is very very welcome! \(-w-)/

* This idea, like most of the good ideas came from NOWHERE! It’s pretty funny to write, tho. Hope you all enjoy it!

* Portuguese Version coming soon!! Thankys for reading, my lollipops! Have a incredible week!  Byeioo!~

                      [~*~]

‘If you could create your own Tickle World. How it that would be?’

(~.~)

For Roman it started when Logan stopped going to his room to talk about new video ideas and their developments. Not that it was an obligation of the said (in truth, sometimes it was very frustrating and tiring), but it had become part of the creative guardian routine, almost a bonding moment between both.

Most of time it was good and the royal side found himself waiting for this weekly moments that for some unknown reason  simply ceased from existion. They diminished little by little until  became so sporadic that Roman took the responsibility into his own hands and now made a point of visit the other when he missed these meetings or just had a random idea and felt the necessity to share it, even if it was undeveloped.

He never addressed this fact to Logan, simply for the lack of some subject that connected or lead to that or for being too distracted debating the good and improving points in the script, where they could be changed and the trails that it would be leading. Because of this he just remembered to bring up the conversation when he already was out of the other’s room, don’t find much motivation to return and broke the pleasant conversation they both had, for the most of time at least, for a subject of which Roman didn’t even knew to what territory it would lead.

For that reason, the subject on matter was left aside.

For Patton, the things initiated a little earlier, perhaps at the very beginning of everything. Just at that period when the one who wears tie moved his balcony chair for a point further away and hidden from the front window.

Those moments when the evening reading in the living room were shifted to the went to his bedroom from where he didn’t came back so early, and, when he did it was only for a short amount of time or somewhere a little farther from the couch itself. Patton lost the count on so many times Virgil had to hiss, like an adorable and cute dark kitty- Okay, focus! Focus!!- until Logan transfers himself to other place or furniture.

The guardian of morality couldn’t help himself in feeling… a bit worried with the behavior change, however, every time he thought in mention it he noticed the extremely rare and calm smile opened so naturally in Logan’s face as he stared something in his phone.

For this reason, for him, the subject on matter was half left aside.

For Virgil, realizing the change on the routine and natural order of the house was absolutely common, small changes happened with small new activities, and the curious aspect definitely was someone who always sought to explore the newest types of knowledge and, due this, for him the things just really began when this change on the routine became… well… routine.

The brain of one on hoodie didn’t waited too much before starting to have the most miscellaneous theories as answers to the not-so-sudden but equally strange change. The hypothesis varied according to his humor, going from it all being Deceit faking being Logan (refuted since both already had been seemed together fighting for the last cup of coffee) to everything being his fault because of his adaptation by the Light Sides, which was the favorite one of that voice in the deep of his mind.

Nevertheless, between all of them, just one hypothesis proved itself as the truth. It was proven on a cold day, the reason why everyone was locked in their room enjoying the warmth from their own beds.

Everyone but Virgil, who already had an almost natural protection (he already accepted the hoodie as part of his own body, it doesn’t matter what the society says.) and calmly headed for the television looking forward to re-watch some movies seeking the references that the last conspiracy theory video he saw said to exist, when his gaze met the shape layed on the couch dropping bubbling giggles.

Logan. Bubbling giggles.

These was for sure two things which didn’t seemed nestable at all, but wow, formed a pretty picture.

So that was it. Logan has an obscure secret. An obscure secret that made him lightly, happily giggle.

(Blackmail, maybe?)

The anxiety’s representation cursed the logic side for being always so respectful about his personal space, his thoughts opinions, desires and almost everything that involved Virgil feeling comfortable, supported and calm around them; because this fact just pushed away any and every evil will to sneaky behind Logan and finally cease once and for all his curiosity.

Consciousness. For that reason, he had to leave the subject on matter aside. But not completely, oh no, never completely.

(~.~)

Logan felt restless. He tapped the fabric of his pants lightly and observed all the landscape, trying to focus on its details and analyze them, seeking for distract his brain off the story he had read the last night, however his mind was always an indomitable spirit when it was referring to this subject. He spent the entire morning thinking, visualizing it, and before he could have a minute for researching about the stars and finally focusing in something else Roman called everyone to discuss in his room about the new scenario that would be used for the special video, which it showed as a proposal practically irrefutable to Logan, who put his obligations above almost every other thing.

- I let the room as a white canvas for we paint it at our desire! - The nomination maybe have been a little too literal, although it didn’t captured the whole essence of the albino forest surrounding the quarter. -   Sure I will be the first who- PANDA COSPLAY, IF YOU PUT ‘WELCOME TO THE BLACK PARADE’ ONE MORE TIME, I SWEAR FOR THE HOLY SWOR-

Logan rolled his eyes for the duo fight, and when his glaze dropped all his body froze, electric goose bumps ran down every inch of his skin, his eyes slightly widening, tense muscles.

The grass around him was beginning to transform, to color itself. From where his feet touched green spirals started to very calmly unfold, as if unaware about its surrounding, including the fright of its ‘creator’.

But, since nothing in life is easy, of course it was not only in color that the grass was being transfigured, but also in shape. The centimeters around his shoes were no longer grass, and yes small green, and as it seemed, extremely soft feathers.

Logan felt blush, nevertheless, more than blush he felt scared… No, ‘scared.’ wasn’t the correct word.

Apprehensive. He felt apprehensive

The rationality’s representation glanced at the others, who fortunately wasn’t paying any attention to him.

He stepped back. The color and feathers followed him, each footprint leaving the place more modificated and colorful. Logan felt his mouth dry. That was a bad idea. An awful idea. He wasn’t supposed to feel that way, wasn’t supposed to have this kind of thoughts. He was the logic, rational, serious, trustworthy, fact-based, not shaken up by feelings side.

Apprehensive. Anxious.

Virgil turned around, letting Roman and Patton chat a little about the scenario to discuss a few option with Logan, since he probably would already have some analysis about the place and more tangibles ideas whic-

His eyes widen.

“Coming here was a mistake. I need to do something. I should…. I should….”

- Logan. Logan. Hey, hey, hey. - He lifted up his glare, allowing himself to look as vulnerable as he felt. Virgil moved closer, their eyes met. - It’s alright. Everything is alright. - His voice was in a slowly, velvety, paused tune. Logan’s muscles slightly relaxed. - There are no problem, ok? It’s alright. We are here. It is we, and we are here at your side.

The one who wears a tie nodded, closing his eyes for a moment and bringing up Thomas’ memories from when he was anxious. He taken a deep breath, always a deep breath.

Breathe in. Hold it for seven seconds.

One…

- Everything is alright.

Yes. It was. It was they and everything was alright.

Virgil finally looked down, seeing what was source of concern for the rational side. The green color began to grow more vivid, more palpable as the spirals increased and expanded, getting bigger and bigger until the divisores lines mingled and they form a only one greenish circle.

Two…

Keep your eyes closed. It is more easier to control myself when my eyes are closed. Focus on the breathing. Focus on the dark. There is nothing to be afraid of.

The movements were bold, precise and calculated. Almost mesmerizing. Now little white particles loosened from the circle that resembled the grass. These particles fluttered in the air for a few moments before starting to stretch and took… a softer, fluffier, delicate shape.

Three…

There is nothing to be afraid of.

Wait. Is those feathers?

Four…

It is they. It is they. It is they. There is no problem because it is they.

A pleasant cold wind became, as if it brought distant news of a coming rain. It was so nostalgic that automatically all the muscles off his body loosen and the sound of small raindrops hitting the treetops became present, even if there was no visible cloud.

Five…

They are family. And respect me, so it is alright. Everything is under my control.

The wind made all the feathers move faster and faster, spiraling around Logan and his concentrated countenance. It was like a little private swirl.

And it spined, it spined, it spined and spined spined spined spined.

Six…

And he could be the aspect responsible for the rationality, knowledge and logic for certain, however it didn’t prevented him to be something more, or to appreciate what he appreciated. It was ok.

It always was.

Patton and Roman’s voices stopped to echo across the room, their gazes finally meeting the peculiar scene unfolding in front of their eyes. They both turned, the attention completely captured.

Seven.

- Logan?

The logic side opened his eyes.

Breathe out.

The swirl exploded consuming everything in a matter of few seconds. Nobody could hear nothing and even less utter some other word. They assumed a defensive pose, arms in front of their eyes and legs tensed ready to run away from any danger; until they realized that wasn’t any real danger. The feather didn’t even touched much their skin, feeling more as a stroke than any other thing.

The sensation ceased. The weather seemed different, colder, lighter, cozier.

And, when they were sure that everything really stopped, that there would be no further transformation, everyone opened his eyes, their breath catching for an instant, as if afraid to spoil the art-  no! Even better… the world around them.

Through all the space white feathers graciously floated to the ground, as little drops of paint in a emerald green that covered the whole grass, which stirred with the calm breeze that hitted it and and lead to green feathers also been released from the said and fly for few seconds before coming back to their original places. Not that it was always possible, since some usually  ended up trapping themselves in the greyish trunks of leafy trees painted in colors that went from pastel to vivids, flashy shades. Small vines decayed from the branches.

Roman stepped forward, curiously touching a pastel one, which wrapped around his wrist, soft as a blanked, each touch leading to electric shivers that made an involuntary smile groom in his face.

The trees were neither too tall nor too high, fact that allowed the cloudy sky been easy seem, not as an anticipation for a storm, but as if it was predicting an pleasant weather either to go out for a wandering or to stay home under the covers catching up on your favorite series. Virgil heard something else, however, he didn’t needed to focus too much before listen the velvety voices came audibles, as if they were brought by the pleasant-scented breeze.

“You are wonderful.”

“Does it tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle?~”

“I’m so proud of you.”

“Oh, it seems like someone is a bit ticklish.~”

“Thank you for all your effort.”

“I didn’t even did nothing and already became a blushy mess! Coothie coothie coo!”

“You did a good job.”

“The tickle monster is gonna getcha, getcha, getcha!”

- No! - Logan’s protests snapped everyone out of their trance, causing their eyes quickly find him, who had tripped and now attempted to get away from two floating gloves that mischievously wiggled their fingers in his direction. The huge smile on his face was almost as noticeable in his tune, whose its owner didn’t had any really warm on trying to escape. - Don’t  you dare to approach an infinitesimal cent-ack!! Nohohohohohohohohohohoho!

All the words went in vain, transfiguration  themselves in laugh when the two gloves ignored his warnings and attacked his ribs. Logan let himself lay on the grass, little snorts flying from his mouth as the said struggled to hold back his laughter, but nothing compared to the volume of the squeal that came from Patton’s lips as he processed the scene unfolded. He excitedly bitted his knuckles, don’t waiting a half second before running to the other.

- Logan!! I can’t belive you like tickling!!!

- Ohohohohohohohohohoho nahahahahahHAHAHAHAAHAaha!! - Their fingers started to focus in his hips, reason why the loud squeaks and more uncontrollable giggles leaved his mouth, but the logic aspect used all his willpower to cover his face with his hands, rolling to the opposite side in order to not being able to see the expression which the cat lover gives to him. Part of him relieved for don’t need to hide nothing anymore and part still very apprehensive with what all of this would result.

- Uh huh, sir! - Patton playfully complained, a grin spreading across his face as he sat at Logan’s side, his hands quickly, and very skillfully, meeting his armpits. Logan shrieked before get lost in a laughing sea, removing his hands from his face in a attempt to stop the new pair which tickled him. His face was completely red, the smile almost brighten the room for its light for being so big, his nose wrinkled and little dimples starting to been present. Patton felt his gaze shine, also laughing. - No hiding that wonderfully cute face of yours, mister! I can’t believe that you didn’t told us sooner, Lo-lo! 

- We can all agreed that this is… how would you say it…? - Virgil showed up, discovering to be an impossible mission not smile at the scene. The melodious giggles, yelps and squealing from both sides filled the air. - undeniably adorable.

Unable to explain why, Logan’s laugh increased, his legs squirming when the dad’s quarter got bored from his armpits and now went for his tummy, scratching, poking, squeezing and making his fingers dance through all its extension, which would surely made the mind’s representation curl in a defensive ball, if it wouldn’t the gloves changing its tickles to his thighs, each knead leading to a different squeal.

A thought crossed the one on hoodie’s brain. His smile faded.

- Hey, Patton. - His voice was more serious, a little fearful. - Wait, wait, wait! - He holded his shoulder, slightly pulling him back and making the paternal one reluctantly stop his ‘attack’, staring Virgil with that ‘lost puppy’ eyes, with a Logan behind thanking silently, or as quietly as possible when laughter and snorts unintentionally kept escaping from his lips due two fingers that teasingly scratch the underside of his knees, taking a few sips of air.

- Kiddo, I know you also wanna have some fun, but you need to be patient and wait your turn! -Virgil felt his entire face on fire, especially as Logan turned, apparently interested in the conversation.

- That isn’t it! - Patton couldn’t help but grin with the defensive tune the other used. Virgil frowned and rolled his eyes, his hands gesticulating all over the room. - This situation… It’s too much to show at once. Logan can be feeling vulnerable, maybe even uncomfortable to being exposed like this.

Both turned to the said, worried, alarmed looks. Logan opened his lips, only for a little squeak jump when the gloves started to squeeze and knead his kneecaps, his wobbly arms tried to remove them, but in vain.

- He need a little break… Roman! - The guardian of anxiety drew the other’s attention, who had to break free of some vines before joining the group, his hair a little messed up and with a breathless smile.

- Oh, why do you call , stormACK!! - The prince’s phrase was interrupted when the purple lover grabbed the gloves and tossed them on him, who even tried to fight against the saids, however ended subdued by skills when they found way to his feet. - VIRHIHIHIHIHIHIHIHIGIL!! NOhohohohohohOHOHOHOHO!

- Sorrey, dude. - Virgil smirked receiving a sharp, but without any anger in it, glare from the aspect of creativity. It was pretty hard take him serious when the said was squirming and happily laughing, tough.

- Uhuhu. You are evil. - Patton also excitedly smiled, before the duo remembered the previous topic of conversation and turned round to the logic side.

Logan was already sitting, adjusting his glasses and tie, his face still had remnants of the blush so as the smile. Everything got quite quiet, apart from Roman, who still laughing with the tickles. Maybe it was that laugh that gave Logan a bit more bravery to lift his gaze, clean his throat and stare the two side who observed him full of cautelous.

- A-about the previous question, Virgil. - For a moment he wished that the voices stopped their teasing, being promptly answered. Thank you. - I appreciate your concern and the free of judgment reaction of everyone, nevertheless. - “The vulnerability, no, the intimacy doesn’t bother me for the only main fact that it is you all, and I know that I’m more protect in your hands than any other on this vast universe.” - N-no hassle. - At least he could remind and utter something from his lift cards, since his brain didn’t seemed to much helpful on this moment. His face was gonna to melt, he was sure of it. - The sensation of vulnerability just would bother me if the fear of rejection was still present or our intimacy wasn’t yet strong. - Looked away. - The latter situation clearly isn’t the case and the first one… There is no reason to be afraid of. - And shut himself.

- Oh, Lo-lo, you are so silly… - Patton knelt down in front of him, staring in such a tender and affectionate way that for a moment Logan really realized how his fear was irrational. - There is no problem in like tickling. - The smile of the paternal figure increased when notice Logan squirm and lightly blush as heard the word.

- We would never criticize you for something like that. - Virgil didn’t knelt down, but the meaning on between his lines already demonstrate enough. -  Liking is liking. If it’s nothing hurting anyone… - Then shrugged.

- In fact is making good! Now we know what to do to hear your fabulous laugh! - The representation of morality evil smirked, wiggling his fingers, which made Logan instinctively stepped away, seeking help on Virgil, who seemed a bit surprise by his action, but he grinned, grabbing one of the flying feathers and twirling this between his fingers.

Logan stepped some more centimeters away as precaution, little giggles beginning to form between his lips.

- Without to mention that he seems to having so much fun! - Patton pointed to Roman, everyone turning to observe the scene where the aspect of hope and dreams still laughing with the gloves’ attack, which apparently found themselves in the mission of create the most bubbling and snorts almost at the same time by scribbling white feathers on his neck.

- Don’t we should help him?

- Do not worry. - Logan adjusted his glasses, voice stuffed with a slightly playfulness. - I programed the gloves to feel when you want more tickles or not. As long Roman don’t wish anymore tickle there wouldn’t be any of it. All of this ‘world’ works as this.

- I have to admit I’m a bit jealous. - Patton absently commented, taking one of the feather falling in circle moviments to the ground. The creator felt his eyes gloom, an absurd urge to smile taking over his body.

- Is that so, Patton? Well, allow me to help you with this impasse. - and before anything could be answered Logan hugged him from behind, digging his fingers on his tummy and leading belly laughter to explode from the cat lover, who started to squirm almost instantality. 

- THAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAT WanS’T WHAHAHahahahahAHAHAT I meAN! LOHOHOHOHohohohohohohohohohohoHOHOHOHO! - His laughter were totally filled with high pitched squeals and screams almost as adorable as his personality.

- Oh, but after your attack I believe that is my right to seek revenge. - His whispered words tickled the shell of the other’s ear, who immediately attempted to hide the ticklish spot in his shoulder, receiving a raspberry in the vulnerable side of his neck. - How kind of you to show that delicate point of yours so I can tickles, tickles, tickles, Patton. Very considerate of you.

- NahahahahahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHahahahahaha!!! - He stopped to struggle, just lightly squirming and letting himself to be carried away on this moment of playfulness and affection from the other, the teasing painting a strong blush on his cheeks and small droplets started to accumulate in the corner of his eyes. Virgil snorted.

- Don’t think that I forgot you, Virgil. - Logan only glanced the one on hoodie, but that alone was already enough to release cold shivers down his spine, smile starting to rise in his face. Even when the logic side came back to give attention on the victim on his claws his Fight or Flight instincts didn’t stopped to kick in.

Something velvety wrapped around his waist.

- NO! Wait!!! - Virgil tried to dislodge the vine that involved him, turning around on time to see other in light colors happily coming towards him. - I didn’t even did nothing! Let me g-

- Precisely, dear Virgil. You have allowed me to be attacked without lifting a single finger, and I believe that  judicially, this can be termed ‘complicity’. - The soft vines began to curl up around all his body, vibrating as they purred. Virgil closed his eyes and pursed his lips tightly, putting effort for any giggle came out of his mouth. Logan’s expression softened a little. - Do not worry, the pastel ones are responsible for light tickles. - When one found its way to that sweet spot beneath his shoulder blades and camped there the barrier broke, a flow of giggles, snorts, and low yelps flyed from his mouth. Virgil’s legs failed in keep him up and for that reason he ended up being carried, having the sensation that he floated in pure light, soft and unbearable tickles. The smile on his face wasn’t huge, but seemed able to light all the space with its cuteness.

And, for Logan, it was in this exact moment, when the carefree laughter walked and danced through all the room that he spent hours and hours imaginating, that everything started…

… to get really interesting.

[senboago]

THE MEGA RP PLOTTING SHEET / MEME.

First and foremost, recall that no one is perfect, we all have witnessed some plotting once which did not went too well, be it because of us or our partner. So here have this, which may help for future plotting. It’s a lot! Yes, but perhaps give your partners some insight? Anyway BOLD what fully applies, italicize if only somewhat.

Mun Name: Abby / Kitty      Age: 24       Contact: pm, discord

Character(s) I rp: (canon) Candice Catnipp, Haineko, Mizuiro Kojima, Retsu Unohana, Yachiru Kusajishi; and them I have about 8 ocs. Which muse(s) inspires you the most atm?(for MM): Elsabeth, Naomi, & Haineko. Current Fandom(s): Bleach (and one One Piece oc) Fandom(s) you have an AU for:  Bleach (Mizuiro’s shinigami au) My language(s): English (natively), Japanese (elementary level) Themes I’m interested in for rp:   Fantasy / Science fiction / Horror / Western / Romance / Thriller / Mystery / Dystopia / Adventure / Modern / Erotic / Crime / Mythology / Classic / History / Renaissance / Medieval / Ancient / War / Family / Politics / Religion / School / Adulthood / Childhood / Apocalyptic / Gods / Sport / Music / Science / Fights / Angst / Smut / Drama / etc. Themes/Genres you have an AU for: history, mythology

Preferred Thread length: one-liner / 1 para / 2 para / 3+ / novella. Asks can be send by: Mutuals / Non-Mutuals / Personals / Anons. Can Asks be continued?:   YES / NO   only by Mutuals?:  YES / NO. Preferred thread type: crack / casual nothing too deep / serious / deep as heck. Is realism / research important for you in certain themes?:   YES / NO. Are you atm open for new plots?:  YES / NO / DEPENDS. Do you handle your draft / ask - count well?:  YES / NO / SOMEWHAT. How long do you usually take to reply?:  24h / 1 week / 2 weeks / 3+ / months / years. I’m okay with interacting: original characters / a relative of my character (an oc) / duplicates / my fandom / crossovers / multi-muses / self-inserts / people with no AU verse for my fandom / canon-divergent portrayals / au-versions (as main or only verse). Do you post more ic or occ?:  IC / OOC. Are you selective with following others?:  YES / NO / DEPENDS.  

Best ways to approach you for rp/plotting:  Pms, mostly. If you have me on discord, even better. I have both apps on my phone too, so I’m usually good about replies; granted if I’m not busy, left my phone somewhere in the house, or am asleep.

What expectations do you hold towards your plotting partner:  Well, I tend to be the type that actually fails at coming up with plot ideas. It’s not that I don’t think of anything, but that I’m either too shy or my brain is too exhausted of ideas. So I guess just enthusiasm works for me, since it gives all the same energy! Especially when talking about ships (including platonic and hate ships) between our muses ‘cause that usually helps lead into some potential plots, as I’ll always be up for discussing new stuff for them; like how we want to develop them, where will they go, when will they get there, etc.

When you notice the plotting is rather one-sided, what do you do?:  I’m a bit of too quiet to say anything really, kinda like a pushover. But if I can gain the confidence, I’d prefer to ask what’s going from my partner’s end. If it turns out they’re really not interested then, and I hate to do it, we’ll just drop it. I want us both to be having fun, and if they’re not into it, then it’d be too selfish of me to try and continue it.

How do you usually plot with others, do you give input or leave most work towards your partner?:  Again, I’m pretty terrible at it, so I’m usually a go with the flow type person. So unfortunately, that leaves most the plotting to them, unless my brain decides to wake up. But when I do have an idea and have the courage to, I’ll pitch it to them. Usually my plots end up starting out as some random headcannon between our muses and their ship, and then it falls into the fascination of ‘I wanna rp that now’, just to see it have a story.

When a partner drops the thread, do you wish to know?:   YES / NO / DEPENDS. - And why?: I get anxious easily. So whether or not I was really into it, it’s nice to know, and easier on my nerves if it was something I was really into. However, it’s not entirely and outright demand that they do all the time. - What should your partner do when dropping a thread?:  Not required, just preferred that they just let me know.

What could possibly lead you to drop a thread?:  Two things. Disinterest is one, and pretty self-explanatory. Then there’s if I just lack the energy for a certain amount of time, after several attempts to actually reply. I usually hate to drop threads. But if I feel there’s absolutely no way I’ll be able to reply, then I’ll either pm my partner directly or make out a post and tag those I’ve dropped threads with, if it’s multiple. - Will you tell your partner?:   YES / NO / DEPENDS.

Is communication in the rpc important to you?   YES / NO. - And why?:  Even though I’m terrible of communication, I still like to hear from my partners every once and a while. It’s kinda why discord is easier to get a hold of me ‘cause, since I have two servers there I mod/admin, I usually check it and will answer there more often. - Are you okay with absolute honesty, even if it may means hearing something negative about you and/or portrayal?:  I wanna say yes, but there’s that anxiety in me that says no. It’s a hit or miss with me. I usually try not to get defensive, and most the time won’t. It’ll just end up making become a bit more cautious, confused, or reclused, depending on what it is; and that’s all ‘cause of anxiety. - Do you think you can handle such situation in a mature way?  YES / NO.

Why do you rp again, is there a goal?:  Mostly to have fun. Also so I can explore my muses and work on my creative writing. When people like what I post too, it makes me extremely happy and excited, wanting to pour out more! So really, not much of a goal other than just share my thought process and ideas.

Wishlist, be it plots or scenarios:  To roleplay and post more stuff for Mizuiro. And to build more relationships of all kinds for my muses, especially my ocs. I’d also like to explore darker themes for a few muses as well, though that’s a bit of a tall order... Not too people can handle or are willing to deep dive, so I’m not sure if that’ll happen really.

Themes I won’t ever rp / explore:  I don’t really have any hard limits. However, I usually refrain from a lot simply for the comfort of others. So I guess there’s quite a bit I won’t ever get into, though I’d like to.

What Type of Starters do you prefer / dislike, can’t work with?: i’m usually good with just about anything. If I’m not, then I’ll inform my partner.

What type of characters catch your interest the most?:  Better question is; what type am I not into? Though truthfully, I’m really into characters with a lot of development, an establish backstory of any kind, and just about any that can capture my heart (which isn’t hard to do btw). I’m not picky and I have very few I truly hate, except for their person rather than the character.

What type of characters catch your interest the least?:  Flat, one-dimensional types with very little development or their own story. I like seeing the ins and outs, the positives and negatives of a character. I want them to put me on a roller coaster of emotions, since that’s life in a nutshell. If they can’t, then I’ll lose interest quickly. Also mary sues/gary stues. Characters that just don’t make sense or follow the universe’s logic are also a major turn off.

What are your strong aspects as rp partner?:  Oh boy... I guess my dedication and love for my muses’ ships. It’s not much, but only thing I can think of. I also try to keep an open mind, be as understanding as possible and to support my partner wherever I can.

What are your weak aspects as rp partner?:  My inability to reply to drafts that have been sitting for a couple of weeks. I want to reply, and yet, as soon as I open the draft and get to work, my brain blanks. It’s really frustrating.

Do you rp smut?:  YES / NO. Do you prefer to go into detail?:  YES / NO / DEPENDS. Are you okay with black curtain?:  YES / NO. - When do you rp smut? More out of fun or character development?:  Just about whenever, as long as partner is up for it. And it’ll be for either or, depending. For certain ships, such as Kaede and Kenpachi, I feel it is part of their character and relationship development, seeing as they’ve managed to grow a deeper bond with each other through it. For other muses, such as almost anything with Amaterasu, it’s usually out of fun. - Anything you would not want to rp there?:  Eh... not really, unless partner is uncomfortable with it.

Are ships important to you?:   YES / NO. Would you say your blog is ship-focused?:   YES / NO. Do you use read more?:  YES / NO / SOMETIMES. Are you: Multi-Ship / Single-Ship / Dual-Ship  —  Multiverse / Singleverse. - What do you love to explore the most in your ships?:  The growth between them. Just literally anything between that. Watching the couple’s bond deepen, how much they learn about each other, and the trust that strengthens over time. - What is your smut tag?: nsfw mention

Are you okay with pre-established relationships?: YES / NO. - And what kind of ones?:  Just about any; romantic, sexual, platonic, hate, family, etc.

► SECTION ABOUT YOUR MUSE.

- What could possibly make your Muse interesting towards others, why should they rp with this particular character of yours now, what possible plots do they offer?:  Usually that’s up to the other’s interpretation of the character. But Kaede has some potential, developing surprising friendship despite her division’s reputation. She’s bit of an opposite from her captain and co-lieutenant, probably being the most patient and kindest of the three, as she’s the only one to pursue any friendships. I would say I’d love to find more plots in reference to her backstory, whether some random character she befriends or is enemies with finds out her birth, or she feels to rekindle a past friendship.

- With what type of Muses do you usually struggle to rp with?:   ... I dunno if I really have an answer for that. Kaede’s one of my easiest going muses, unafraid to interact with anyone. She tends to fit in just about anywhere. Though I’m sure this partly due to her being my most developed and being well established. - With what type of Muses do they usually work well with?:  Honestly, I think just about anyone, depending on the scenerio and who they are. That also determines how she approaches and interacts with them.

- What interests your Muse(s) in general:  There’s a list of things. Gardening, social gatherings, her division... She’s also into new experiences, things that are foreign to the Soul Society. - What do they desire, is their goal?:  She simply wants to make her mother proud, to better society if she can, and continue to aid and serve her division. - What catches their interest first when meeting someone new?:  Body language. It’s a trained type of thing, trying to read them by how they hold themselves. How approachable they appear, their intent, etc. - What do they value in a person?:  Depends, as she understands everyone is different. But mostly their determination, honesty, and dedication, even if she’s not the receiver. She can still respect them for it. - What themes do they like talking about?:  Eh... Just about anything, aside from herself. Anything gardening or about flowers is where she’s the most enthusiastic. - Which themes bore them?:  Idle chitchat or small talk. She likes to carry an actual conversation. So trying to ask her about the weather, she’ll more than likely walk away.

- Did they ever went through something traumatic?:  Sort of? There’s a couple things; the discovery of Azashiro’s imprisonment and his crimes, the sudden disappearance of Yoruichi and Kisuke, and the brief encounter with Yhwach’s clone during the war. - What could possibly trigger them?:  Both Azashiro’s imprisonment and Yoruichi and Kisuke’s exile have been resolved, so no. Though to ask her about Azashiro, she’ll be guarded and, depending on the person, defensive. The incident with Yhwach was a literal flash, leaving her physically scarred, but otherwise unfazed. - What could set them off, enrage them?:  Azashiro, yes. Depending on who the person is, obviously. Kisuke is the most notable target of this rage. - What could lead to an instant kill?:  Again, Azashiro, depending on who brings it up and what’s brought up. Mostly, if it targets her mother and threatens to expose them, including her adopted father.

- Is there someone /-thing they hate?:  Yhwach and Aizen. Both have caused a degree of grief in the Soul Society, and even for those outside it. She also hates those that use their position of power for selfish reasons. - Is there someone /-thing they love?:  Her mother and adopted father, and the Shiba clan as a whole. Her division, and her current captain and co-lieutenant, along with her former captain and her brother Yuushirou. She also loves, though won’t admit it often enough, Askin (verse dependent). Kenpachi as well (verse dependent). Any and all her friends, including Kisuke. There’s also a huge soft spot for animals of any kind.

Is your Muse easy to approach?: YES / NO. - Best ways to approach them?:  As long as you’re not a sworn enemy to her or the society, just about anyone’s good to go. Just strike up conversation, ask for a spar, to drink, etc. She isn’t one to simply ignore or dismiss anyone, so long as there isn’t any bad terms between them. - Where are they usually to find?:  In the second division offices or training grounds (sometimes in the onsen), at her home, or strolling or patrolling through the Seireitei.

Something you may still want to point out about your muse?:  Eh... nothing I can think of off the top of my head. Except that, no matter how kind a face she has, she can still be a merciless killer.

CONGRATS!!! You managed it, now tag your mutuals! ♥

Tagged by:  @skyvar​ (thanks for the tag, though not sure if I should really be thanking you ‘cause this about drained me!) Tagging:  you reading this.

[dicecast]

The Paradox of Draco Malfoy

Or: Why do People like Draco Malfoy

      Who are the most important characters from Harry Potter?  If you were a marketer and had to design a set of I  don’t know, candy for each of the main characters, who do you include?  You only have 9 slots.  The Trio obviously are the main characters, and then Voldemort, Snape and Dumbledore. Neville, Hagrid, and then in the last slot you’d probably put Malfoy.   And the question is…..why?

(character looks much cooler than he is)

See Draco Malfoy is an iconic character of franchise, easily one of the most memorable and beloved characters, certainly he has received the most fanfiction, but looking at the books…Malfoy isn’t that important.  He only majorly effects the plot in the first and 6th book, and even then he is never the central forces of either story, his role in the story is usually just him showing up, being kinda of a dick, and then something bad happening to him.  Barry Crouch jr and Sr, are in every way more important characters to the plot and themes of the story, and yet they aren’t really registered as major characters.  

(this character matters a lot more)

And it isn’t just that he is iconic, I mean Boba Fett is iconic and he barely does anything, but Malfoy is loved.  I mean there is a Tv Trope “Draco in Leather Pants” for a reason, in fact in many ways he is more beloved and admired than Ron, who is an actual character who does stuff.  And I can’t empathies this enough, the sheer amount of Malfoy fanfiction out there is overwhelming, I know fanfiction will elevate any character given enough time, but there is a reason why I know about this, despite never reading HP fanfiction.  I mean the Very Potter Musical makes Malfoy the secondary protagonist on equal billing to Harry Himself, and honestly gets more of an arch.  Which is particularly puzzling because again

Malfoy isn’t that important of a character.  

   Almost every Malfoy scene actually in the books follows certain beats, and you can break them down.  Malfoy approaches Harry, Harry’s friends, or some helpless weak kid who Harry feels obligated to protect, Malfoy is a colossal asshole, and he either leaves smugly or is humiliated.  Or Malfoy actively tries to do something dickish like dress up like a dementor, or ambush Harry &co on the train, which inevitably back fires and he ends up humiliated.  Even random lines that mention him basically boil down to “Malfoy did something dickish”.  Occasionally you will have a scene where some element of the world is explored by something bad happeing to Malfoy, like Harry using the invisibility cloak to fuck with him, or Malfoy being forced to go into the woods, or Malfoy getting turned into a ferret.  Until book 6, he is basically just a bit character, who shows up, does something dickish, and then usually gets the shit beaten out of him.

In short

Malfoy in Fandom

Malfoy in the Books 

Now there are many reasons why we like Malfoy, some to do with his design (especially in the movies), the fact that Slytherin has the best color scheme (snakes are cool yo), our societies complicated feelings toward aristocracy, and the overall popularity of villians over heroes, the latter point could be its own video.  But I’m going to narrow in on three main points, which as an academic, I’m required by law to spell out to you before I explain them

Reader Rebellion and Slytherin’s appeal

Malfoy’s status as “the Bully” vs. his actual character

SHIPPING

(trying too hard)

   See, part of the reason why people like Malfoy is because what I call “Reader Subversion”, basically when the audience rejects what the text is telling them to do.  The most obvious example is watching bad movies for fun, these movies want to be seen as serious or dramatic, and instead we are just laughing at how bad they are (The Dungeons and Dragons movie is one I recommend).  So when the narrative is telling us “Hate this character, look how unlikable we made him” its very tempting to just be like “Screw you, I’ll sympathize with the character”.  Another example of this in HP is the embrace of Slytherin, which at least memetically is tied with Ravenclaw for most popular house.  Its associated with sexiness, coolness, ambition, and cunning but frankly…those traits aren’t really on display in the books.  

(Slytherin in the Fandom)

The vast majority of Slytherins we meet are…kinda stupid, just selfish cruel vindictive spoiled assholes who only care about protecting their status.  Its less sexy vampires, and more Trump administration entitlement.

(Slytherin in the books)

 But because the books are telling us so much how bad this house is, how much they suck, how much they are the “bad guy house” it’s pretty tempting to reject the narrative and find reasons to like them.  Topic for another video, but I notice this is popular when the narrative is very obvious about how much we should hate an antagonist ,and when the antagonists are more annoying than actually threatening.  

This instinct is especially important because that is one of the major themes of the book in the character of Snape.  Everything about the character is designed to make us dislike him, he is cruel, selfish, petty, vindictive, and is actively abusing his position of power to psychologically torment children.  He is given all the “bad guy” physical characteristics, he dresses in black, and pretty much does something dickish in every scene he is in.  And critically…he is the good guy.  The point the book is making is that even if somebody is a massive asshole, that doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t possess positive qualities.  This is arguably the main theme of the series, that people have more to them than we first imagine, we see this with Neville, the Crouches, Dumbledore, McGonagall, the Marauders, REB, Fudge, and Dudley all relate to this them.

The inverse of Snape is James Potter, who is revealed to have been an arrogant bully (and incidentally my second favorite characters in the series).  Now this is a topic for another video, but I think that the greatest failing of the HP series is not really following through with this theme, for every character who learn more about, there are others who stay the same, Lilly Potter and Voldemort being the worse examples.  But this finally gets to the problem of Malfoy 

See from the start Malfoy is coded as somebody who isn’t just a bad person, but also a simplistic one, he has a very clear role as a character, of “The Bully.”  Basically, the Bully exists to be a minor antagonist to the hero, and possibly embody the writer’s childhood issues.  This character is like the terminator of petty spite, he will go out of his way to make the protagonists miserable in the most needlessly cruel way possible.  They will relentless pursue fucking with the protagonists at the expense of even their own basic self-interest.  This is one of the most overdone, tired, and uncreative roles in fiction, I’ve always hated bully characters and I feel they make the problem of childhood bullying a lot worse because it doesn’t recognize where the instinct to bully comes from, and how complicated it is.  What the stranger in a ski mask is to understanding rape, so this character is to understanding bullying.  Bully characters exist to be generic antagonists, so they are almost anniversary awful.  The only examples I can think of who are good are Cordelia from Buffy…and Draco Malfoy.  

Cause when you break it down, Malfoy has motivations, relationships, goals, ideals, insecurities enough to make a full character, or at least a resemblance of one.  He truly loves his family, he has some massive set of issues and he loves his family.  Its honestly kinda compelling how he like “yeah I’m going to be evil when I grow up” but that same wimpness that makes him less threatening to Harry is also his greatest virtue, he simply isn’t strong enough to be truly evil and that is kind of a good thing.  Honestly its sort of the anti-Neville, while Neville is a giant coward except when the chips are down and that is his greatest virtue, Malfoy acts tough until shit gets real and that is also his greatest virtue.  Cowardice makes him a better person, in contrast to Crouch or Riddle who are extremely brave and cruel.  

Also when compared to his father, you realize Draco is basically desperately trying to be something he isn’t, a cross between a Lannister and a Bond villain and he just can’t quite manage it.  And his frustration with Harry comes in large part because Harry kinda has everything Malfoy desperately wants all without “earning it”.  Draco is obviously somebody who is pressured a great deal by his family to succeed and has a lot to live up to, and deep down doesn’t’ really think he is up to the task.  And as we see in book 6, he isn’t.  Harry meanwhile basically has what Malfoy wants the most without even trying, which makes Malfoy risk thinking about his own inability to live up to his father’s standards which leads him to lash out.  It isn’t a super complicated character but there is potential, which is never really explored in the books because Rowling doesn’t like him.  

There is potential for a fully character there, and it honestly reminds me of Snape, we are given a character whose every action is coded bad but if we pay attention we realize there is more personality there than our initial impressions give credit for.  But unlike Snape, we don’t actually get rewarded for looking closer to Malfoy, if you pay close attention you realize there is more to him but the narrative basically doesn’t care about him.  The reader isn’t rewarded for taking the book’s advice and examining the character beyond the trappings of his presentation, which is one of the most frustrating experiences you can get as a reader, feeling all the work you put in was for nothing. And that frustration is, along with radiation poisoning, the greatest impetus for the creation of fanfiction, which is basically the result of stories cockblocking the audience.

(did this happen in the movies I don’t even remember)

This goes to the shipping thing. Full up, I don’t ship Harry/Malfoy, in large part bceause of how much of Harry’s character is determined by his internal narration, and that to me disproves any indication that Harry likes Malfoy.  He spends so little mental energy on Malfoy, when ever he encounters him he is like “oh yeah that guy is a shit..I bet he likes Thatcher” but when Malfoy isn’t on screen Harry doesn’t really care, he has more important things to worry about like being British and having a shockingly high pain tolerance.  The only time when Malfoy seems to occupy Harry’s thoughts its the 6th books, and only when there is a plot reason, and in the 7th he doesn’t care again.  Compare this to how he thinks about Cho Chang, where he spends mental energy on her even when she isn’t on screen.  Harry just doesn’t care.

BUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

Malfoy does.  Malfoy over the course of the book goes dramatically out of his way to fuck with Harry Potter, he dramatically inconveniences himself in order to fuck with Harry.  in the first book he sneaks out at night to try to fuck with Harry Potter for its own sake and gets caught for it.  He dresses up in dementor robes to mess with him, he waits in hallways to make fun of him, he designs a bunch of badges to mock him, like Malfoy seemingly goes out of his way to fuck with Harry above and beyond the norm.  So...why

(I”M AN ADULT)

Well the actual reason is that Malfoy is the Bully character and that is what Bullies do, which is why bullies in fiction are often so boring and don’t resemble real life bullies, who are much closer to Snape or James Potter.  But this doesn’t work with Malfoy because the character is just well written enough that you have to ask “wait why is this guy acting so obsessed”

(WTF is he doing in this shot?)

And that is where some of the shipping comes from.  Its not necessarily true, since you could just read it as Malfoy being super insecure and envious, but you could easily also read it as just “Malfoy has a crush on harry and is a shithead”  Repressed homosexual lust is as good explanation as many for his weird fixation on Harry.  It certainly makes more sense than “he is just evil” which 

seems to be the canon.  

TLDR, Malfoy is interesting because the writer seems to actively dislike him and dismiss him like the Tory punk that he is, but the fandom loves him so much that they have turned him into a whole new character the reason why is that he is just well written enough to be intriguing but has no follow through.  

Also who names their kid Scoripus Hyperion Malfoy jesus christ this guy is the Jacob Rees Mogg of the HP series.

[mimi-sanisanidiot]

Love is wild sometimes, ain't it?

Do you ever feel like you're in love with someone that you can't have?

I am, more often than I'd like to admit.

I'm in love with my best friend. And I can't have her. Because she's in love with our other best friend. And it hurts. So damn much.

Hi, my name's Mimi and I'm a fucking dumbass, welcome to my tedtalk!

For the sake of anonymity of my friends, I'll refer to them as Bean, and Mochi. We're all female so here we are.

I met both Bean and Mochi in my first year of highschool. I met them separately in mutual classes and I found out we're all mutal friends. Bean was in my art class and we were on opposite ends of the room, but always in the view of one another. When I first saw Bean, she confused me so much. Bean is rather tall for a girl and has a slim thick frame, due to her androgynous style of clothes and fluffy short hair, she's often confused as a boy. Which works for her style. At the time, me being a still blind lil gay in the making, couldn't tell if she was a boy or a girl due to being so far away. But honestly it never bothered me. Still Bean confused me so much!! One day she'd be in baggy male clothing and the next she was in a crop top with a skirt and knee high socks! Either way she made my heart race! I didn't care if she was a boy exploring her style and identity or a girl having fun with her outfits or anything in between. So one day, I gathered the courage to finally walk up to her and complimented her My Chemical Romance t-shirt that she wore often, after class. I was never the kind of girl who made friends easily but could make conversation with any stranger if I truly tried to.

So saying that, you can obviously see that I as a new freshman tried to become friends with this beautifully intimidating human being by pointing out the most teenager angsty thing a teenager can wear to show how angsty they are! The cliche of teenager angst, My Chemical Romance!!! That aside, this would be my first official real conversation with her, aside from the shy hi's and nervous excuse me's that we often exchanged when we passed by and bumped into each other during class in accident. So you can see where this is going. I obviously made a fool of myself trying to speak clearly and loud enough for her to hear me as I walked by her on the way out of class, keep in mind most kids were trying to leave and they were quite loud since the door was near her desk. She hadn't heard me so she asked me to repeat myself, while I was panicking on the INSIDE! I did repeat myself, while stuttering a bit and my subtle lisp wasn't so subtle anymore! I was dying.. I wanted to bolt out that door and hide in my corner and never emerge again. But she was so nice.. She just smiled so sweetly and so kindly at me seeing that I was freaking out about my inability to speak properly at the moment, it surprised me honestly. No one other than my parents had looked at me like that but my parents hadn't comforted me about my stuttering since I was a child. And here she was, this awkwardly shy giant was smiling at me, making me feel so much better and still making my heart race. I felt myself smile back a bit and nodded and turned to make my way out of class. But she stopped me, she had then complimented my Attack on Titan button and my Spirited Away button my backpack, which made me so happy! She knew who these characters were and she complimented me on them. No one, not even my friends, said anything about them. They never noticed them, nor did they like anime. So to have Bean notice them and say she liked them, made my day.

Soon after that, I asked her if she'd like to join me for lunch and she did.

We hit it off immediately! We're both dorks and nerds about different childhood shows and random nerd stuff. Not only that, we both looove food! And we also connected on the fact that we're huge romantics and are girls on the slightly heavier and tall side too. We became close friends and hung out at lunch almost everyday. Up to this point, I was always by myself at lunch since all my other friends had 1st lunch and Bean and I had 2nd lunch. I was alone and then, I wasn't. Bean had made me her friend and that made a difference in my life for the better. I had dealt with a traumatic incident in my last year of middle school so i don't doubt that Bean practically saved my life my freshman year, even if she doesn't realize that but that is a story for another time. She also introduced me to some of my closest friends now. So I have her to thank for that. I soon realized that I had a huge crush on her that I feel like was really obvious but not to either of us. But that doesn't matter, since I never confessed and she had her boyfriends and people she dated as we grew closer. Although it hurt me, it made me happy just seeing her happy. And I was there to help her feel better when things didn't work out in the end. And that made feel happy just knowing she was happy and that I made her feel comfortable enough to come to me for help. So I too had dated a few people and had my heart broken quite a few times but my heart had always beated a bit faster when I thought of her.

My love for Bean only grew as the years pasted. But as did the growing friend zone between us. So I pulled an Angelica Skylar and was just happy that I could keep her in my life.

My bond with Mochi had also grown throughout the years despite us being different in multiple ways. Mochi sometimes gets overly comfortable sometimes and it ticks me off sometimes but she means well. The three of us have late night adventures and loads of sleep overs and have fun gushing about music and cute people, both male and female and nonbinary peeps! It's fun.

Back to my main simp story and not my sad friendzone gay shit.

The three of us are quite open with our sexuality and feminine charms, ya know? We flirt with each other often, it's always been part of our banter. We also playfully grope/fondle each other when ever we're together. The fondling occurs more often than not when we're with Mochi. Sure we all initiate it at some point but when Mochi is hanging out with either of us, she's the main instigator. We're all chill about it cause titties are nice, and so are soft thighs and love handles! We all like the soft plush!! We all drink body appreciation in this household!!

Mochi is fantastic! I love her so much! But she also becomes unresponsive to group moments sometimes.. Like we would all be chilling watching a movie or something, like maybe having a conversation and then she'd be off by herself always on her phone and never reacts to anything we say. When she stays over, she sleeps way in, past what we decided, and is inconsiderate of if either one of us have any other plans that day. We plan to have a sleep over of one day and she stays for 3. I can never ask her to leave cause I was always raised with my home is open for those who need it but one can also overstay their welcome. And I absolutely despise confrontation. It makes me uncomfortable and makes me feel like I'm the dick, even when I know that I'm in the right.

But that's besides the point. I love them, I truly do. I'm just weak against my friends when it comes to my own comfort sometimes. That's something I'm working on currently.

So you see, these are my best friends, yes they are flawed but so am I. Yet I absolutely love them.

Mochi had invited both Bean and me to a whole weekend trip with some of her friends that she wanted to introduce to us. Sadly I couldn't attend having already used my day out of that week the day before she had asked. But Bean went. They had a blast, drinking and going out to the shopping district of the beach town they went to. Not in that order obviously. They were safe and locked themselves in their hotel room when they began drinking and hadn't went out once they began. I'm not going to lie here, it hurt not being able to go because I was excited to meet Mochi's friends and hang out and have drink to let loose for once, you know?

But when they came back, Bean had kinda went off the grid. She wasn't responding to group chats nor private messaging. At first I thought, oh she's busy and she'll get back to me later so no sweat right? Wrong.. She never did. And when I'd check out our messages, she only left me on seen and that's it. Then I'm like, did I do something wrong or is she doing okay? Turns out, she's fine. But I wouldn't have known that if it weren't for Mochi. Mochi had told me something that broke my heart more than it did finding out Bean was in love with a toxic manipulating piece of garbage with mommy issues and she was sacrificing her own mental well being to help a human dumpster fire. Again that's another story for another time.

So this is it, it hurts to know the person I've been in love with for almost 6 years, had kissed my best friend and has admitted to a stranger, while drunk, about how much she wants to get with said best friend. Never.. Never did it occur to me, that she ever felt that way towards Mochi, and that she also kissed Mochi while Mochi was and still is with her boyfriend.

I don't know what hurts more, the drunk confession to a stranger, the kiss or that she didn't tell me her feelings for Mochi.

I know that I'm not entitled to her feelings nor her explanation nor ever lil detail of her life. Because that's not healthy nor is it right. I know that the only person at fault here is my own toxic mentality. But I still worry sometimes okay..?

I was worried that she was having a bad time and she was by herself.

I was worried that something had happened to her.

I was worried that she had had enough of me, and was simply trying to figure out a way to end our friendship without trying to be mean about it..

I was worried that she simply hated me and wanted me out of her life for good and was simply ghosting me until I got the hint...

Maybe that I had done something to have upsetted her..

I just guess that Bean didn't need my prying and needed time to collect her thoughts.

But at the very least, she could have done was send me a message. Like "I'm fine, need time to collect myself, ttyl" or something...!

My own intrusive thoughts are bad enough, but worrying about whether or not, my best friend is alright is too much!!

I dont even know! Maybe I'm the ass in this scenario! With my own toxic pensive ideals and my overbearing personality. Maybe I shouldn't project my feelings towards my best friends and maybe just fucking grow up and move on from something that will clearly never happen!!!

Maybe I should simply get over it..

But it hurts, so much..

Because maybe I missed my shot at ever being able to confess to Bean.. Because I'll never know if she ever felt the same, that I'll never know if I had a chance at all... All because I was too scared to lose my best friend...

Now I might lose both of them if they don't work their feelings out... Maybe I'm just a pathetic piece of garbage.

I have no clue how I'm supposed to act anymore. Mochi is still with her boyfriend, Bean is in an emotional limbo and needs to collect herself and I'm an emotional mess.

If anyone has any advice on what I should do or how I should proceed, please let me know.

I have dinner with them in an hour, and I'm scared.

Thank you if you made it this far, I appreciate that you're willing to read a strangers love life or the lack of one and follow their rant. I hope you all have a great day, evening, or night, stay hydrated and tell your loved ones that you love them before it's too late.

Please learn from my own mistakes. If anyone likes this, then let me know and I'll tell you more about my pathetic love life stories and my pining over my best friend.