#but like there's moments in between where u can see how smart and calculating he is

[magicaldreamfox1]

so i'm just thinking abt the reputation pete must have post-canon among main family bodyguards.

like as we know from pete himself, word travels fast amongst main family bodyguards and there must be a few who survived the ep 14, confrontation. obviously people would've known pete at least in passing, he's tankhun's head bodyguard that must mean something. and suddenly he's missing for a few days, rumour has it he went to the minor family's house (with the fit tankhun threw (rightfully so) surely people would've heard abt it right? right) and everyone knows what happens to bodyguards who are sent to the minor family's house. except pete returns and word spreads fast about that too. pete returned, covered in blood and injured but alive. then the family showdown happens, a lot of people die but surely a few main family bodyguards would survive. and they would hear abt it. pete left. he resigned. and they let him. which i'm sure not many bodyguards can say for themselves. rumour has it he went after vegas. and then shot a bodyguard of the main family dead for him. and that he's with vegas now.

vegas who has A Reputation, everyone knows that. so pete not only made it out of the minor family's house alive, he also managed to resign and then went to be with vegas.

and maybe they'd even see him sometime, pete coming to visit porsche or tankhun and he looks fine like he's doing well.

and like. they must be terrified of him. and like even when they get new bodyguards word would spread just as quickly. u don't fuck with pete bc pete has seen the worst of the worst of this world and not only come out alive the other end, he also willingly walked back right into it.

[animeyanderelover]

Can u do yandere shikamaru and yandere temari sharing an s/o who already has a kid.

I was hoping for a request like this because the chemistry between Shikamaru and Temari is gold.

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, possessiveness, obsessiveness, harsh Yandere, manipulation, stalking, mentions of divorce, negligence, abuse

Sharing a darling that already has a kid

🌪🦌Luckily both are ready to share and are already a couple because Temari is a possessive lady as a Yandere. With Shikamaru or with one of her brothers she has the least troubles sharing though so that comes to Shikamaru’s luck because Temari can be…a bit scary when she’s agitated. Shikamaru is a bit more open with the topic of sharing to say the least, though since Temari is his wife and he knows that she’s deep down a responsible and honest person who loves the s/o, he won’t have any objections at all. Both might just be glad that it turns out that they share the feelings for you and since both are perceptive and sharp observers, they notice sooner or later. Rather sooner.

🌪🦌The only real problem is that both are hyper-aware of their obsession so they kind of end up dwelling initially over that, especially considering that their darling has a child. And a specifically huge trouble would appear if the other parent and partner would still be in the picture, ensuring that s/o and child are happy. No doubts that if those two would get to know that your partner isn’t a good fit for the role of lover and parent, ignoring you and child, they would have no problems removing that toxic threat from you and the kid. And they will be harsh with the culprit, especially Temari would be all too willing to lash out on them for not being good for their family. Shikamaru, more responsible for convincing the darling into ending the toxic relationship if they were still to be clinging to it, is far more subtle yet the tension if he were to meet said person is sharper than a kunai. Ruining their reputation will be done without hesitation, showing everyone how terrible and lowly they are.

🌪🦌The moment any damaging abuse would be shown in this relationship to you and the small one it’s about over, maybe even with the price of their own life. Temari is harsh but responsible enough to judge a person’s action and Shikamaru is one of the most chill Yandere to have. But both love the darling and the child and if someone would lay a wrong hand on them, both will without a doubt tend to succumb to their darkest sides. With Temari being seen initially as the more dangerous one since she’d without a doubt grow violent in public the moment she found out and saw that jerk’s face, in such situations it’s by far Shikamaru who is the walking menace. He’s smart, calculating and differently from Temari’s rage that is like a hurricane where everyone can sense the danger from far away, he’s acting not like that.

🌪🦌Shikamaru’s wrath is far more hidden in the darkness, a cold and insanely calm one that devours the victim slowly. Temari is very intelligent as well, but Shikamaru beats everyone by far in such category and he will make a plan on how to get rid of the monster who harmed you two. Temari lets him handle all because even she would get scared from the frightening empty look in his eyes if the said scenario would be true, yet the anger is creeping inside the darkness like shadows. Making Shikamaru furious is the wit’s end because he rarely snaps and if he does, it means almost always death. It’s a deadly mistake.

🌪🦌But what if you’d be happy and have a loving partner who loves the child as well? Both would get without a doubt worked up over this, knowing that you lead a happy life. For both it’s a heavy burden to carry, seeing the person they love in the arms of another one with the child is like a sharp punch in the face, unable to look straight into such a painfully happy picture of happiness. Ashamed and disappointed in themselves, they’d try probably to bury those feelings away and not ruin the happy family. Giving in to their inner demons takes time, even with Temari snapping quicker since she has the worse temper.

🌪🦌Both might find over time reasons why they can’t quite see your lover as a fit for parent and partner. Maybe because they don’t deem them as strong enough, maybe because they don’t have a good feeling about this person in general. Blackmailing and sabotage from behind the scenes would be the main way of handling this problem. They’d both start pointing out things between you and your spouse that don’t seem to work well together, habits that annoy each other or incapacities of your lover in regards of the roles they have to fill in to make the young one and you happy. Shikamaru has the possibilities to use his shadow jutsu to manipulate them a bit as well, causing them to ridicule themself in public or Temari who ends up guaranteeing that they end up always being too late to important meetings.

🌪🦌Arguments might rose with you suddenly paying specifically much attention to the differences between you and your lover due to the thoughts planted inside of you from the couple, aspects that they’re missing as a parent and attentive partner, additionally to the troubles caused due to Shikamaru’s and Temari’s secretive doing. At the end a divorce might look like the best choice, more and more problems suddenly arising until life becomes nearly impossible with them and everyone notices that this relationship has been broken. Temari and Shikamaru will most likely be torn apart with bittersweet feelings when news arise that you have finally divorced yourself, unable to live with him together. They did want this yet seeing you and the confused kid mourning over this sudden separation hurts worse than being beaten bloodily. Without a doubt in such a scenario both would be extremely kind and nice to child and darling, unable to shake the guild of their actions off.

🌪🦌No matter the scenario, both won’t hold anything against the child. They’ll treat them like their own child and they’ll fill in quickly the gap that the biological parent and partner has left behind. They often help their darling, look after and play with the child and will insert themselves more and more into the life of the two of them. Especially for the child this might be important if they’re young, lacking a parent figure and suddenly having two. Shikamaru as the extremely chill and cool father and Temari as the more stricter yet surprisingly doting mother in certain moments. Getting close to the child only leads automatically to getting closer to the s/o as well.

🌪🦌If the former lover of yours were to be still alive and around, possibly even still wanting to meet and see the kid, both wouldn’t be too comfortable with this. Here it does depend on how the separation happened and both might agree to it if the divorce were to blame on them, understanding that the citizen still cares about the child. Now if it were to be in the case where your partner wasn’t good with their roles, both wouldn’t want them anywhere near you and their kid. You see, as soon as they have successfully gained love and approval of darling and little kid, they won’t ever give those positions up for anyone so if the ex were ever to demand the child and the s/o back, no one of those would ever let that happen.

🌪🦌Maybe even the child would kind of start shipping the darling and those two since both bond well with them and they see that their mother/father is happy with them. Temari and Shikamaru are a pair that works rather well together as well since Shikamaru can manage to calm the vivid Temari down when a situation can be dealt with in a more composed way and Temari will force her husband to do something when he’s initially too lazy to act on it. They’re most likely able to lead a normal looking relationship with their darling, with some planning even managing to lead a public relationship with the s/o and the child somehow at one point. Unlikely that they’d force you into anything. They aren’t keen of that thought in general and with a child in their life it’s all the more important to not lash out. The blonde woman will still lecture child and s/o equally harsh if they were to do something that could have been potentially dangerous, but she only means well.

[storiesforallfandoms]

the girl next door ~ rodrick heffley;diary of a wimpy kid

word count: 1675

request?: yes!

waaaavyguurl “hey! could you do a rodrick heffley imagine where in rodrick rules the fem!reader has just moved in a house next to the heffley’s and she’s in maths class with rodrick. she’s kinda a genius, so he asks her to help him with hw and they start dating ?? maybe with an insert of greg who understands they’re together when he sees them dancing at the party ?? thank u <3″

description: in which rodrick falls for the smart girl next door

pairing: rodrick heffley x female!reader

warnings: swearing

masterlist

His mother had been adamant about the entire Heffley family going to greet their new neighbors just a day after they moved in. Susan spent the whole night making brownies, with Manny’s “help”, and had them boxed up and ready to go the next morning.

“What if they’re allergic to brownies?” Greg asked after Frank had to literally drag him out of bed.

“They’re made from scratch, so the only allergies in it are dairy and gluten,” Susan responded.

“Why couldn’t this have waited till tonight?” Rodrick groaned. “Give them some time to breathe before we scare them off.”

“If we wait too long we’ll look like rude neighbors!”

Rodrick rolled his eyes. He was sure none of the other people on the block had went to meet the new neighbors yet, but there was no talking Susan Heffley out of something once she set her mind to it.

She made the boys dress up in their nicest clothes, which for Rodrick was a pair of jeans without holes in them and a plain black t-shirt, before they made their way across the street. Rodrick let out an annoyed sigh as Susan knocked on the door and they waited.

A girl that looked about Rodrick’s age answered the door. Rodrick couldn’t help but stand up a little straighter as her eyes wandered over the family before her. “Uh...hi?”

“Hello!” Susan greeted. “We’re the Heffleys; I’m Susan, this is my husband, Frank, and my boys, Manny, Greg, and Rodrick. We just wanted to come over and welcome you and your parents to the neighborhood with some homemade brownies!”

“Nice to meet you,” the young girl greeted. “I’m (Y/N). You guys actually just missed my parents. They both work morning shifts, they won’t be home until sometime this evening.”

Rodrick held back his desire to tell his mother “I told you so”.

“Wait, so you’re here by yourself?” Greg asked. “That’s so cool!”

(Y/N) chuckled. “I appreciate the gesture none the less, and my parents will, too. I’ll tell them you stopped by, they’ll probably invite you guys back for dinner sometime.”

“That’d be great!” Susan said. “We’ll wait for your call!”

Greg and Manny were the first to break away from their parents, excitedly running back to the house to play video games and watch cartoons like they normally did on a weekend morning. Susan chased after Manny, telling him not to run across the street without her, while Frank just silently left. Rodrick stayed a moment, trying to think of something to say to (Y/N).

“I-I guess I’ll see you at school on Monday,” he finally managed to say, immediately cringing at the stupid thing he decided to say.

(Y/N) smiled at this, though, and responded, “Yeah, I’ll see you Monday. It’ll be nice to already know a friendly face.”

Rodrick smiled back and nodded. (Y/N) closed the door as Rodrick turned away, silently celebrating to himself before joining his family back at the Heffley household.

~~~~~~

That Monday, Rodrick tried not to seem too obvious as he looked around for (Y/N) at school. He couldn’t hide his disappointment when he couldn’t find her the first half of the day.

When she walked into his sixth period math class, Rodrick smiled widely and waved at her. She smiled back and quickly sat in the empty seat next to him.

“Hey! I finally found you!” she said. “This school is so big, and there’s so many people!”

“Yeah, it is pretty big,” Rodrick responded, lamely. “How have your classes been so far?”

(Y/N) shrugged. “They’re, you know, classes. I feel like I can’t form an opinion on anything yet.”

Before Rodrick could ask anymore questions, the teacher came in to start the class.

Math class always dragged on, but that day it felt like it was going at a pace even slower than a snail. Rodrick wanted nothing more than for the class to just end so he could talk to her more.

“The answer is six,” (Y/N) whispered to herself.

Rodrick looked over at her. “What?”

(Y/N) looked at him. Her face was confused at first until she realized she had spoken out loud. Before she could respond, the teacher asked, “Do you two have something to add Miss. (Y/L/N)? Mr. Heffley?”

The two exchanged a look before (Y/N) responded. “The answer to the equation is actually six. You mixed up on your second to last calculation.”

A snicker came from her classmates as the teacher rolled his eyes at her. “I can assure you my calculations are correct Miss. (Y/L/N).”

“I’m not saying they’re all wrong, just the second to last calculation.” (Y/N) rose from her seat and made her way to the whiteboard. “May I?”

“Oh sure, since you know everything.”

(Y/N) ignored his sarcastic tone and erased everything that was on the board except for the starting equation. Rodrick watched as (Y/N) rewrote the entire equation down to the last step, in which she changed the workings to equal six.

The entire room seemed to hold their breath as (Y/N) turned to their teacher. He had a blank expression on his face before letting out a sigh. “Okay, I see your point. Well done Miss. (Y/L/N), now go sit down.”

(Y/N) returned to her seat next to Rodrick, her cheeks tinted pink.

When class finally ended, Rodrick and (Y/N) left together. “That was so impressive! You’re, like, a math genius.”

“My parents have been teaching me basically since I was born,” (Y/N) explained. “They basically made me an overachiever since birth.”

“That’s cool, though. Maybe you could help me with my homework sometime.”

(Y/N) smiled. “Yeah! I’d love to!”

~~~~~~~

Rodrick watched (Y/N) talk to some friends in the living room from his spot in the kitchen. He couldn’t help but smile when she laughed at whatever one of the girls had said.

(Y/N) had really opened up in the months following her moving in. She had gained a great group of friends and had opened up a lot to the people in their grade. She was no longer the shy new girl, but now the smart, semi-popular girl that everyone loved.

“How long till you tell mom and dad about (Y/N)?” Greg asked as he came to stand next to his big brother.

“Disintegrate child,” Rodrick hissed. “Wait, how do you know about me and (Y/N)?”

Greg scoffed. “Come on, Rodrick. You’ve never looked at a girl the way you look at her, among other very obvious tells. You are totally in love with her.”

“Whoa, whoa. Back it up little bro. In love is a strong word. I like her a lot at the most.”

“Like who a lot?”

(Y/N) walked up to the brothers and threw an arm over Rodrick’s shoulder. He felt his heart starting to race at just her close proximity, and he couldn’t stop the smile that spread on his face knowing she was there next to him.

Okay, maybe I love her a little bit.

“What lucky girl has taken little Rodrick’s heart?” (Y/N) continued with their “friends” bit.

“You can drop it. Greg knows about us.”

(Y/N) sighed with relief as she dropped her arm from Rodrick’s shoulder. “Good. There was no way I was going to be able to pretend that Rodrick liked someone else. I was sure I was gonna crack.”

Rodrick wrapped his arm around (Y/N)’s shoulder and kissed her forehead. (Y/N) leaned into his embrace, a dreamy smile on her face as she peered up at her boyfriend. Greg looked between the two of them, an amused smile on his face.

“I’m happy for you guys,” he said. “But, just remember (Y/N), you could do so much better than Rodrick.”

Rodrick untangled himself from Greg just long enough to feign a threatening punch. Greg took off as soon as Rodrick’s hand went up, disappearing into the crowd of party people around him. Rodrick shook his head and rolled his eyes as (Y/N) laughed.

“He’s smarter than you give him credit for,” (Y/N) pointed out.

“Don’t give him too much credit, it’ll go to his already massive sized head,” Rodrick warned her.

(Y/N) laughed before giving Rodrick a quick peck on her lips. “So, Greg has already figured us out. When do we tell your parents?”

Rodrick sighed as he pulled (Y/N) tightly against them. “Realistically, they’re the next step. I don’t need Greg having anything else he can hold over my head as leverage or blackmail. But...I really don’t want you to meet them. Not because I don’t think they’d like you, they already love you more than they love the three of us. It’s just...mom is super overbearing, especially with girlfriends. The last one I had that I brought to meet them, mom straight up asked her if she planned to ever have kids and get married after graduating high school.”

(Y/N) covered her mouth to try and stifle the laugh that came out. She had met Susan Heffley a few times in passing when doing homework with Rodrick, and even in the few times she had met Rodrick’s mom, she knew that Rodrick’s story was not an exaggeration.”

“Dad is just boring,” Rodrick continued. “He doesn’t do much besides work and collect figurines. He’ll probably ask you if you’ll talk me out of being in the band and actually doing something with my life.”

(Y/N) leaned into Rodrick again. “I won’t push you. You have your reasonings for not wanting me to meet them, and I understand those reasonings. But, just so you know, they’re not gonna chase me away from you. I’m in this for the long haul, Heffley. You’re stuck with me until you get tired of me.”

Rodrick smiled and kissed (Y/N) again. “I’ll never get tired of you, (Y/L/N).”

[t0wnspersonb]

You’re Beautiful (Kuroo Tetsurou x Reader)

Word Count: 4,784

Warnings: SMUT, slight angst, bullying, my shit writing, Kuroo being too damn hot

Summary: Despite how much you loved him, you couldn’t handle the constant bullying that came with dating one of the most sought after males at your school. The constant harassment from Kuroo’s fans ended with you breaking up with him. But when Kuroo founds out the truth... well he does everything in his power to make sure you’re taken care of.

~~~~

Anonymous said:

Hiii 🦊 Rachel here! Could I please request a scenario in which kuroo s/o has been being constantly bullied by kuroo's fangirls during months to the point in which her self confidence is almost crushed but she remain silent and decides to try yo break Up with him?. She appears the Next day at school wearing sexy clothes and make up to make them believe she Split Up with him seriosly. But kuroo notices what's happening and reassures her? Smut ending please if possible!! Thank u so much!! 😊

~~~~

Anonymous said:

Can I please request a scenario where Kuroo helps his gf relieve her stress by giving her his full attention and worshipping her? She’s also very insecure. He walks in the room to find her staring at herself in the mirror, lifting her shirt up and looking sad (insecure about her body). No need for angst though! She beams the moment he flirts with her and call her kitten. Soft!dom vibes with lots of dirty talk and praise (and maybe cockwarming?). Thank you 🥺 ily and your blog btw

~~~~

I decided to put these two requests together since they both fall into the same category! I hope you enjoy this one Rachel and anon! 

Sorry it took so long for me to write! I think I do a terrible job at writing characters as a dom so I apologize in advance if it wasn’t what you guys were wanting! As always please let me know what you guys think:)

~~~~

“- I don’t understand.” Kuroo’s frown deepened, his fingers clenching and unclenching into fists at his side.

 You had an audience, the soft whispers of people passing by curled around your ear like the wind.

 You knew exactly what they were talking about, what they will be talking about for the next couple of weeks.

 “Y/n why are you breaking up with me?” he pressed further, his tall frame taking a step closer to you. 

 “I told you.” Your voice sounds strained, even to your own ears, despite the mental preparation you had to do before.

 Hell, there was no amount of mental preparation that could prepare you for something like this.

 Kuroo’s annoyed and calculating expression shifted dramatically, hurt and confusion clouded his face, his large hand reached out towards you, causing you to take a step back, your arms wrapping around your body.

 You wanted to curl into yourself, to disappear completely so you didn’t have to see Kuroo’s pained expression.

 “That doesn’t… that doesn’t make sense! We were doing great! You knew what you were getting into when you agreed to go out with me! So why… why all of a sudden -” 

 “I told you.” You stressed, cutting him off immediately. “I don’t want to be with someone who only focuses on their club activities. You never have time for me, you’re always so busy with your stupid club. I can’t do this anymore.”

 Lies.

 Lies.

 Lies.

 They were all lies.

 But you… you had to make this work, you had to make this hurt, or else… or else you knew he would never leave you alone.

 The whispering around you got louder, the large smirks from the girls amongst the crowd pierced into your heart.

 But not as much as this.

 Kuroo’s expression ripped your heart in two.

 This hurt like hell.

 “Your team is waiting for you Kuroo.” You said quietly, ignoring the ache in your chest as he visibly flinched at the use of his surname, something you never called him. “I’ll see you around.”

 You turned to walk away, resisting the urge to look back at the tall male. You could feel tears stinging at your eyes as you rushed out of the school gates, it was probably a mistake to do this right after class; catching him right before he went into volleyball practice. 

 It honestly was all a mistake but… you didn’t have a choice.

 You were suddenly yanked back, causing you to stumble about.

 “That was quite the show.” a familiar voice drawled out, you flinched as you scrambled away from the group of girls that were staring you down.

 The group of girls that caused this mess.

 “It was smart of you to break up with him. Kuroo-san belongs to all of us, not just you. You ugly girl.” She sneered. “Who would want you anyway? Kuroo-san was just dating you out of pity, I bet he just wanted a quick lay. Since you’re that easy.”

 You could feel your lower lip tremble, the tears that were already gathered in your eyes threatening to spill over. 

 “Well it’s done, just leave me alone now.” You mumbled, walking away. 

 As soon as you were a safe distance away, tears began pouring down your face. 

The flood of emotions you were experiencing was something like no other. The pain that you felt deep within your chest was excruciating, and all you could see behind your lids as you wiped at your eyes was Kuroo’s hurt expression.

 You were lucky enough that your mother wasn’t home, she wouldn’t be home for the next couple of days due to a business trip. 

 Which meant you could cry your heart out in peace.

 No amount of mental preparation prepared you for this. For the hurt that you had caused the person you loved the most, for the hurt that you were experiencing from the constant cruelty of those girls.

 It was all too much. 

 By the time you had finally finished crying it was late at night, and you found yourself in front of your bathroom mirror.

 They were right, you were an ugly girl, why would Kuroo want to be with someone like you? 

 It was always a question that lingered in the back of your mind when Kuroo confessed to you. It was strange wasn’t it? He was quite possibly the most perfect human being you had ever met, so why would he want to be with you?

 “Since you’re that easy.” 

 You shook your head from the comment, Kuroo was your first for everything; memories that you would cherish forever, even if you were no longer with him.

 You at least knew that comment wasn’t true, Kuroo wasn’t a cruel person, there was no way he would have thought of you that way.

 The person you were looking at in the mirror wasn’t someone you recognized. A stranger in your own skin, your eyes flickered to every inch of your insecurities, your body shrinking down.

 You couldn’t go on like this, something had to change.

 ****

 “W-What are you wearing Y/n-chan?” Yaku asked, face flushed, as he took in your uniform.

 You were lucky enough to have arrived at school without any encounters with those girls and Kuroo. But you were unlucky in the fact that you were in the same class as Kuroo and Yaku.

 “D-Does it look bad?” You asked, carefully tugging at the hem of your skirt.

 “No but… you never wear anything that short… I’m just not used to seeing you like that… are you wearing makeup?” Yaku looked at you in surprise, the pink in his cheeks never fading.

 You rubbed the back of your neck sheepishly, your head ducking down in embarrassment as you nodded.

 This was so uncomfortable; you were completely out of your element right now.

 You had opted for the shorter uniform skirt today, something that was completely different than your usual knee length one. Your legs had never been so exposed at school before.

 The makeup… well, you hardly ever wore makeup, it wasn’t like you were wearing a whole lot of it, but just enough to make you feel just a tad less insecure about yourself.

 “Kuroo is gonna flip when he -” Yaku shut his mouth immediately; eyes casting away from you.

 That’s right.

 He had almost forgotten that you had broken up with him yesterday, and from the slight fall of your face, maybe you had forgotten too.

 “You know… Kuroo was devastated when he came into practice yesterday, he made us do twice as many drills, got upset over the littlest things…” Yaku trailed off, glancing over at you briefly. “We didn’t know what had happened until Lev said something about it. News travels fast around here huh?” he joked weakly.

 “Just news that involves your golden boy.” you said quietly, your eyes trained on your folded hands that rested on your desk.

 Yaku turned his body completely towards you now. “Y/n-chan what happened? Why did you -” the classroom door suddenly opened, and in walked the golden boy himself.

 He looked… exhausted, sad. 

 The tiny piece that you were able to fix in your heart shattered once again, leaving you empty and achy inside.

 This was all your fault. 

 His exhaustion, his sadness, that was all you.

 You could feel his eyes flickering over to your form, but you didn’t dare meet his gaze, you settled for pulling out one of your books from your bag; eyes focused on the page, although, you couldn’t even comprehend what it was you were reading.

 His shadow loomed over you as he paused next to your desk. It was only for a couple of seconds before he sighed loudly, taking his seat behind Yaku.

 Fuck today was going to be a long day.

 ****

 The next couple of days were routine now, Yaku would attempt to make small talk with you, struggling each and every time to ask you what had happened between you and Kuroo, and each time it ended with Kuroo entering the classroom and standing near your desk before sighing loudly and leaving.

 Despite the fact that it was becoming routine, it still wasn’t easy. None of it was, the only easy thing was that those pesky girls in his fan club left you alone, at least you got relief from that.

 Until today. 

 Of course, it would be when you were walking home that they would approach you, no one in sight.

 “You really think that dressing up and wearing makeup is going to make you pretty?” one of them scoffed, a wicked smirk playing on her lips. “You’re still ugly, you did Kuroo-san a favor by dumping him, who would want to be with someone as hideous as you?”

 You gritted your teeth, your hands tightening around the strap of your bag as you attempted to step around them, only for them to get in your way once more. 

 They were cornering you now.

 “I did what you asked, why do you keep bothering me?” you asked quietly, pleading almost.

 “Because you took him away from us all those months ago. Kuroo-san has never and will never be yours. It honestly was such a bitchy thing for you to do Y/n. You really think that by just breaking up with him you would be let off the hook? Wrong.” 

 Your quiet demeanor never faltered; you were desperate to go home though. So you tried stepping around them once again, only to be shoved back into another one of the girls.

 They were laughing at you as they shoved you about, but you didn’t have the strength to fight back, to stand up for yourself.

 You just… you just let it happen.

 You probably deserved it anyway, right? 

 For breaking Kuroo’s heart.

 You deserved all of it, right?

 “Hey!” 

 Everyone froze, yourself included. You knew that voice all too well, and you couldn’t help the tears that began to pool in your eyes.

 Cool fingers clasped at your wrist, carefully yanking you away from the group of girls that were now cowering in front of the tall male that stood before them.

 “Are you okay Y/n?” Kenma peered at you in concern, carefully releasing his grip on you. You nodded, rubbing at your eyes with the sleeve of your sweater.

 “K-Kuroo-san! We were just teaching her a lesson! She hurt you, didn’t she? We were just trying to protect you!” one of the girl’s pleaded.

 You had never seen Kuroo like this. He was genuinely angry, his eyes all but turning into slits as he glared down at the group of girls who were nearly in tears at this point.

 “From what I heard, you guys are the reason that Y/n broke up with me.” he said, tone deep and dark. “From what I saw… well… girls like you absolutely disgust me.” he sneered. 

 “K-Kuroo-san.” one of them began to cry.

 “From now on stay away from me, and stay away from Y/n. If I catch you guys anywhere near her then we’re going to have some problems. Understand?” he stood incredibly tall; his arms folded across his chest as he stared down at the group of girls.

 It was silent for a moment and then whimpers and loud cries began to erupt from the group, all of them running off.

 As soon as they were out of sight Kuroo slumped down, sighing tiredly as his large hand ran down his face, rubbing off whatever emotions he was feeling. But then he was turning to face you, concern clouding his eyes as he walked closer.

 “Are you hurt?” he murmured softly, one of his fingers gently sliding against your cheek, his eyes flickering across your face.

 You shook your head, but you could feel oncoming tears beginning to pool. You desperately wanted to throw yourself into his arms at this point.

 But Kuroo knew you too well, he recognized the look on your face and his hand slid down to grasp yours.

 “Let’s go.” he said. “Kenma I’m going to take Y/n home. Walk home without me.” his eyes glanced over at his friend who nodded, waving goodbye to the two of you before taking his leave.

 For the most part, the trip home was entirely quiet, you two hadn’t addressed anything that had happened at the school, or what had happened in the days prior. It was mostly small talk, but you felt lighter somehow. 

 Kuroo brought the best out of you, he was your better half; his mere presence brought a sense of calm to the raging storm inside of you.

 He also had never let go of your hand.

 Maybe it was because of what happened earlier, or maybe it was an unconsciousness thing, but you were grateful for it.

 His hand was large and warm, his thumb rubbing gently against the back of your hand, it was entirely soothing.

 But now your anxiety was through the roof as you approached your front door, pausing to retrieve the keys from your bag.

 Would he go? 

 Would he want to come in?

 Would he want answers?

 Would you guys get back together?

 “Y/n....” Kuroo stared down at you intensely, his face nothing but serious. “Can we talk?”

 Fuck. Maybe it was all of the above.

 You bit your lip, nodding before you guys stepped into your house.

 “Where’s your mom?” Kuroo asked casually, slipping off his shoes.

 “She’s on a business trip, she’ll be back on Saturday.” you said quietly. Kuroo said nothing back as you guys made your way to your room. Silence engulfing you completely, the air thick with tension.

 “Do you really not want to be with me anymore?” Kuroo asked as soon as you guys got settled in. There was no room for small talk now, he had jumped to the point immediately.

 “Or did you break up with me because of those girls?” he asked, his eyes never leaving your form.

“They’ve been… they’ve been harassing me since we got together, it got really bad recently…” you trailed off, ignoring the dark look that crossed over his face for a moment. 

 “Why didn’t you tell me?” his voice was incredibly soft now, his expression gentle. “I would’ve done something about it.”

 “I don’t know.” you whimpered out, the tears that you had been holding back since school finally spilled over. “They were your fans… you’re so amazing, I didn’t want them to think badly of you. They’re right, you know. Why would someone like you want someone like me? I’m not very pretty or smart, I’m not passionate like you are… they said I was only dragging you down. I didn’t want to hold you back anymore. So, I - I had to break up with you, had to hurt you enough so that you wouldn’t try pursuing me anymore.”

 At this point you were full on sobbing, blabbering your confession. The words just leaked out, there was no point in stopping now, not like you could anyway. 

 “I didn’t mean what I said about the team either. I just said that to hurt your feelings. I love that you’re so dedicated to your team and volleyball, I love how hard you work towards your goals. You’re so good at what you do. I’m so sorry Kuroo. I’m so sorry.” you choked out, another sob tearing through your lips as you desperately tried wiping away the ongoing flow of tears.

 Your eyes were incredibly blurry, your loud crying and hiccups were the only sound that could be heard in the room. You hadn’t even registered that Kuroo had gotten off your bed until you were being yanked into a warm chest. His strong arms wrapped around you tightly, crushing you to his body.

 Warmth seeped into your being, radiated off of his chest and into yours. Your nose was filled with the scent of Kuroo, familiar and perfect as you buried your face deeper into his chest. 

 He caged you against his body, the strong grip he had only tightening further; his large hands rubbed up and down your back, soothing your hysteria until there were only soft hiccups and sniffles.

 You weren’t sure how long Kuroo held you for, but you didn’t care. You never wanted to leave his arms.

 He was solid, so strong and warm; grounding you to this moment. You could only think of him, as he was right now, and as you were right now. Right now, this moment was perfect.

 Right now, you knew that you would never stop loving Kuroo Tetsurou.

 “I wish you would’ve told me about those girls earlier.” he finally spoke, his voice was calm, the movement of his hands never stopping against your back. “At least you’re telling me now. But…” his hands gently pulled you away from his body. His eyes burned as they stared into your own, the intensity of his gaze took your breath away, he had never looked at you like that before. 

 “You’re seriously stupid if you think any of that is true. Not pretty? Not smart? Dragging me down? Holding me back? That’s not true.” He cupped your face carefully, titling your head back slightly, forcing your eyes to only stare at him. 

 “You’re the kindest person I know. You’re so beautiful, you have no idea how many of the guys at our school wanted to go out with you. You’re the top of our class, did you forget that you’re in the college prep class? You’re incredibly smart. You’ve never dragged me down; you’ve never held me back. You make me want to be better, you make me want to work harder. If I don’t have you by my side… then what’s the point to any of it?” his voice was deep and fierce, full of fiery passion as he stared down at you. 

 “Do you love me?” he asked.

 “Of course, I love you, I never stop-” Kuroo slammed his lips against yours, kissing you fiercely and urgently.

 You whimpered loudly, fingers gripping at the front of his uniform tightly as you surrendered yourself to his kiss. 

 Every ounce of his feelings for you were being poured into this kiss, it was searing, burning you completely as he nipped and sucked at your bottom lip, forcing his tongue into your mouth easily.

 It was wet and hot as he massaged the pink muscle in your mouth with his own, and you could only take it, clinging to him desperately as you tried to keep up with his pace.

 You hadn’t even realized that he was taking steps back until your world shifted, Kuroo easily pulling you down onto his lap as he sat on your bed. You held yourself up, knees pressing into the soft mattress on either side of his hips.

 “You’re mine.” he breathed against your mouth, the hand that was resting on your back trailed down towards your exposed legs. His fingers curled around the back of your upper thigh, skimming against the band of the thigh highs that you wore.

 “I can’t believe you started wearing these tiny little skirts to school. I hated the way other guys would look at you whenever you left the classroom… and the makeup? Who were you trying to impress?” he murmured, nipping at your bottom lip before trailing his mouth against the underside of your jaw, and down your throat.

 “I - ahh - I just wanted to…” your fingers slid into his hair; eyes fluttering shut as his tongue flickered out to taste your skin. “Feel good about myself.”

 He pulled away from you, his lips swollen, and pupils blown as he stared at you. “You’re gorgeous, you don’t need to make yourself up like that. I’ll make you feel good.” 

 Kuroo began tugging the clothes off of your guys’ body, easily tossing them to the floor until you were both bare.

 His lips parted as his eyes wandered to every inch of your skin, greedily taking in all of your pretty curves. You were his, he’d never let anyone else have you, he’d never let anyone else see you like this. Sprawled out on top of the bed, face flushed a beautiful pink, your knees bent as your feet sat flat against the sheets, your core entirely exposed to him.

 You were dripping, cunt glistening and begging to be touched.

 “It’s embarrassing.” you whispered, face heating up as you took in the way he stared openly at your exposed lower half. You moved to clamp your legs shut, only for his large hands to grab your knees, ripping them apart easily, exposing you further.

 “What’s so embarrassing about a boyfriend wanting to stare at his beautiful girlfriend?” he asked, eyebrow raising, a small smirk grazed his lips. “I’m going to make you feel so good, kitten.” 

 His face sank lower, the hands that were resting on your knees sliding down until they curled around the back of your upper thighs, pushing them further apart and up. 

His nose brushed against your mound and then you felt his hot breath blowing against your center, causing a loud whimper to escape your lips, your fingers gripping at the sheets below.

 “Thank you for the meal.” he smirked against you, eyes flickering towards you before his mouth enveloped you completely.

 You cried out.

 Kuroo’s mouth was like a furnace as he lapped at your cunt carefully, flattening his tongue against your soaked entrance before flicking it up towards your swollen bundle of nerves.

 The pink muscle easily swirled against your clit, lazy almost, before dipping back into your slit, moving in and out of you perfectly.

 Your chest was heaving at this point, your fingers reaching down to tangle into his already messy hair, urging him closer.

 His grip on your thighs tightened, his tongue moving against you faster as he felt you drip onto his tongue.

 “Tetsurou.” you whimpered. “I’m close, so close.” you slurred, the familiar tightness within your belly coiling rapidly.

 Kuroo pulled himself away immediately, a loud whine tearing through your lips.

 “N-No! Why did you stop?” You cried out, the tightness residing immediately, the dull ache of your cunt begging for more attention, for release.

 Kuroo stood above you, a devilish grin stretching across his face as you whined pitifully at him. One of the hands that was gripping your thigh suddenly came down, swatting at your swollen cunt with a sharp sting.

 You cried out in surprise as your body jolted with pleasure. His fingers gently running up and down your soaked folds, pressing down gently against your bundle of nerves.

 “I know I said I would make you feel good, but… there needs to be some kind of punishment too. Since you tried breaking up with me, and you kept secrets from me.” he chuckled, his eyes held nothing but warmth though, filled to the brim with love and lust. 

Suddenly Kuroo was hauling you up, easily pulling you back onto his lap, you could feel his hard member rubbing against the curve of your ass and then he was shifting you up once more and - another loud cry tore through your lips as he sheathed himself inside of you completely.

 The stretch burned as you struggled to accommodate his size, you would never get to this stretch, to him being buried deep inside of you.

 He hushed you tenderly, his lips pressing gently against your temple. His breath came out in hot, wet pants against the side of your neck.

 “Look at you.” he breathed, his eyes focused on the mirror that was propped against your wall, facing your bed. “Look at how fucking beautiful you are. Look at how well you take my cock kitten.” 

 Your eyes were screwed closed as you struggled to adjust to the new intrusion in your body. When you finally opened your eyes a loud mewl tore through your swollen lips.

 Kuroo had your back pressed tightly against his chest, your legs hung over the side of his muscular thighs, his thick member buried deep in your cunt.

 The scene before you was incredibly lewd. The way your pussy lips were stretched around his thick cock was on full display, your bare body covered in sweat and flushed red. The dazed look on your face and the tears gathering in your eyes; it was too much.

 Kuroo had his chin resting against your shoulder, his eyes never leaving the mirror as he took in every inch of you.

 “S-So embarrassing.” You whined again, attempting to turn your face away so you no longer had to stare at yourself in the mirror.

 Kuroo wasn’t having any of that, his strong fingers gripped your chin easily, forcing your head back towards the front. 

 “Don’t look away.” he commanded into the shell of your ear. “I want you to watch.” he began moving, his hips bucking up, sliding in and out of your velvety walls. “I want you to see how absolutely perfect you are. I want you to see how well you take my cock, I want you to see yourself cum. I want you to see how good I make you feel.”

 Your lips were parted, moans spilling out of your mouth as you watched the way your breasts moved with each hard thrust of his hips, the way your cunt stretched around his swollen member that continuously disappeared inside of your body.

 “You make the sweetest faces. Fuck look at how wet you are for me kitten.” Kuroo groaned lowly into your ear, his tongue flickering out against the skin. His eyes never left your form, cat-like and dangerous as you took what he gave you.

 “Do you hear that?” he murmured lowly. “Fuck you’re so soaked for me.” over the rustling of sheets and your moans the soft squelching noises of your soaked cunt could be heard.

 “Should I make you cum?” he breathed, his hand reaching down, his fingers brushing against your parted folds that were stretched tightly around his cock. His eyes were glued to the obscene image before him, memorized with the way you engulfed him completely. 

 “Please.” you sobbed, overstimulated tears now rolling down your cheeks. “Tetsu, please.” 

 He moaned softly, fingers reaching up to rub at your clit. 

 It didn’t take long before you began unraveling, from the quick swipes of his fingers against your bundle of nerves, from the way that his member filled you to the brim, reaching a devastating depth within you, it was no wonder you were reaching your end so quickly.

 You watched as your cunt gushed around him, trickling down his balls and staining the sheets below.

 “Fuck.” he hissed, teeth sinking into your bare shoulder as you convulsed against him. You were panting, crying at the rush of pleasure still coursing through your body.

 Kuroo stayed buried inside of you, waiting for you to catch your breath, your walls fluttering around him. He wouldn’t last long. But he needed you to cum again.

 “Give me another one kitten, I know you can do it.” he cooed, and then his hips started jack hammering into your core, hard and fast as his fingers worked against your clit once again.

 It was too much, overstimulating, sharp and biting, and you took it all. 

You sobbed loudly as your end approached, faster this time, but far more devastating. Especially when you felt his release, Kuroo painted your insides a beautiful white as he spilled himself deep within your core.

 You could feel your ears ringing, vaguely registering his gentle praises as he stretched you across the bed, sliding out of your puffy and swollen cunt carefully. You could feel his warmth seeping out, trailing down the length of your legs, but you were far too exhausted to care, to clean up.

 He pulled the sheets over your body pulling you against his sweaty chest, his strong fingers brushing away the hair that clung to the sides of your face.

 “I love you.” he breathed, a gentle smile covering his lips as he gazed down at you. “You’re so beautiful. I can’t believe you’re mine.”

 You sighed softly, a sweet smile grazing your lips as you stared back at him. “I love you Tetsu. I don’t ever want to be without you again.” you nuzzled your face into his chest, his arms wrapping around your body tightly.

 “I didn’t spend all that time convincing you to go out with me for you to leave so quickly. You’re stuck with me, and my stupid club.” he grinned at you.

 “That’s okay. I really missed spending time with Kenma.”

 “Oi.”

[luckyspacerabbit]

would you ever share the background you created for kai leng? i'd be so interested in hearing it!

Hehe, yes! Thank you for waiting anon. I wanted to really think this through and make sure I was working with all the possible details of his character.

Okay, so my goal with fleshing out Kai was not to excuse him as a villain or to necessarily redeem him, but to humanize him and hopefully incur sympathy because I find his depiction as a mysterious lackey boogeyman to be 🙄 one dimensional and playing on racist tropes like the yellow peril ✨ (also bioware making him predominantly chinese + a lil russian. extrapolate what u will lol)

So here is my background for Kai :) Lots of childhood headcanoning and then some general talk about his character/why I chose certain elements as I did (such as dumping that dumb phantom blade for butterfly swords AEORHIG)

Childhood: According to the wiki, Kai is Earthborn, and from his general heritage we can assume that he grew up in Northern China (omg that's where my ancestors are from). The most populous city there is Beijing, which, if there was a spaceport or alliance recruitment anywhere, it would be there.

I headcanon that he was born to a bit of an unsteady family, where it was likely there was estrangement and unsafe conditions between the mother and father that may have created a sense of helplessness and neglect from a young age.

In my canon, Dan Hyun's mom, Hannah Shepard was the head of an agricultural research facility on Trident, and was an old friend of Kai's mom (From University, possibly).

As conditions worsened throughout Kai's childhood, his mom decided to take a chance and flee with Kai (age 10 at the time) to Hannah Shepard's science facility on Trident (Sentinel Agricultural Research Facility), where she and Kai would stay for about two years as his mom worked to save enough money for their own place .

Since Dan Hyun was already being homeschooled, it was easy enough for Kai to join up alongside her.

Dan Hyun (12 at the time) was extremely happy to have a friend since life on the facility could be really lonely-- but with all these changes Kai was having a difficult time adjusting, especially when Dan Hyun felt put off by his competitive attitude. After so long feeling neglected and growing in a tumultuous home environment, he craved external validation: homeschool provided an avenue for that. They developed their own academic-based competitive rivalry that counted towards friendship, but grew distant when he moved out with his mom about two years later.

When Dan Hyun was 18 (Kai at 16), she managed to apply to an Alliance Research Training program and receive admission-- something that was considered highly prestigious, despite her parents' reluctance. Kai had already begun to build resentment towards her due to the way her parents treated her (very preciously, sheltered, and without exposing her to the difficult parts of life) in contrast with what he lacked in family and world kindness, creating a drive to supersede her and compete with her once again, if only to have tangible proof that just because he began in a lower place didn't mean he couldn't surpass the vision of success.

After this event, they would strike up a still somewhat friendly rivalry again that continued until Kai enlisted in the Alliance at the age of 18 (his attempts to join directly at 16 failed in my canon lol, but he sure tried )

Alliance Service:

Kai took the combat-driven route while Dan Hyun was receiving training for her eventual research establishment in Akuze, meaning that in their line of work, they never crossed paths-- Though they maintained occasional communication and met up here and there whenever Kai was back from his tours.

This is where I believe his decline truly began.

Some habits, like his desire for tangible proof of success and seeking external validation, manifested more heavily in this time. Collecting badges off of dead soldiers (To remember his skill first hand) is a notable one, but I speculate he relied heavily on the word of his commanding officers to counter his self-esteem. Titles were incredibly important because they were proof. When he began to feel a loss of control which led to emotional outbursts and breakdowns, he would fall back on these bits of evidence that he had done something, anything.

The weight and violence of service combined to break away his mental strength and conditioned him to that of a soldier.

Famously, he was discharged in 2186 after his N7 designation. In a bar fight on shore leave, he murdered a Krogan (OKAY. Listen. The wiki says "first-degree murder" but first degree requires premeditation and bar fight implies heat of the moment. So IDK I think the details around this one are a little fishy. He was on leave but he was a soldier, so ? he probably just had a weapon on him? Okay, I'm not excusing him but premeditation is a bit different from manslaughter so just something I've pondered. It separates intentional killers from accidental murders).

At this point, he is formally incarcerated and set to serve a twenty-year sentence.

Cerberus Contact:

The year is 2177, and Kai has lost everything he's ever worked for. His prestige is gone, he is at the worst place he has ever been, his mom won't talk to him, and he has no one. He had even stopped hearing from Dan Hyun, the only person he could have considered a friend once.

Through a small TV in the prison, he is able to hear about the attack on Akuze, and its one survivor: Alliance Scientist Dan Hyun Shepard. In the attack her biotic abilities (Which she had kept secret for many years) were revealed, prompting immediate recruitment into the N7 Program and a contract for ten years of service. This drove Kai into rock bottom-- while he had nothing, Dan Hyun was steadily on track to uprooting the only thing he had ever felt like he had accomplished.

This is when Cerberus intervened, promising him a home, freedom, belonging, and success.

So of course Kai agreed. Why wouldn't he? He had nothing left in his miserable life and there would never again be a place for him.

Cerberus Intervention:

It's my belief that Kai wasn't necessarily "alienphobic" in the beginning. Instead, I think The Illusive Man saw a very clear opportunity to recruit and nurture a broken man into a pawn of service. TIM is incredibly smart-- everyone who works for Cerberus is. He knew what Kai needed was validation, the promise of success held directly on the tip of his tongue to drive him into tenacity and action.

Organizations like Cerberus, even in real life, prey on people at weak points, fulfill their needs and drape their ideology on top like icing on a cake. That's not to say that Kai is completely innocent-- he ate the sweets and readily threw the world to the side in order to attain more-- but it does give some perspective.

Kai in Cerberus:

In ME2 we know there is some apprehension on Kai's part about the role Shepard will play. He is already starting to feel slighted from failures with Rasa and takes even the possibility of rejection from TIM extremely hard and with violent emotional outburst. This evidences how much TIM has whittled him away over the decade of service. Kai feels as though he owes everything to TIM, that TIM saw something in him-- failing him is disproving that and accepting what Kai has feared all along: that he truly is a worthless and incapable person.

Kai and Shepard:

Kai is best known for his direct antagonism towards Shepard in the events of ME3, directly killing their allies and potential love interests in a way that is extremely personal. Yes, it is part of the job, but at the same time, it's clear Shepard gets under his skin. It's because in the end, after all that setup, Shepard is the one person who can take it all away from him.

They can replace him as TIM's prodigy/ They can bring an end to the organization that gave him everything (From his cybernetic enhancements (uh indoctrination cough couch) ) to his purpose in life. Kai threw it all in with them because he didn't see another choice.

My Canon: The End

So how do things end for Kai in my canon?

As you're aware, you can unalive him, violently. But Dan Hyun is very emotional and due to their shared childhood, I like to believe that there was still a grand feeling of kinship between them, a recognition of the other due to shared insecurities. I don't think there was ever a time Dan Hyun looked at Kai and saw anything other than her slighted friend (which is very romanticized, but SHE is very romanticized), it was just about getting Kai to see that too.

She locked him down the best she could, yelled, cried, and beat the shit out of him, but ultimately, preserved his life. After the crucible had been fired and Thane (alive ofc) attended to, she sought to right things between her and Kai: whatever form that takes. Who knows if he'll ever be able to live comfortably in society again-- but at least here, he has the chance.

Random Tidbits:

Some notes! At his best, I like that Kai is portrayed as Loyal, Hard Working, Methodical, Clever, Tenacious, and Factual. I think sometimes he can be written off unfairly as wimpy or scared, but in truth, he's very sure of his abilities and able to calculate his chances extremely well. He's smarter than fandom gives him credit for.

He has an interesting conflict between arrogance based on title and humbleness. He knows he wants to be the best but he never airs it-- like when Rasa suggests that he wants to be the leader for Humanity but he grows quiet and says to just focus on where things are at right now.

His time as a soldier absolutely affected him in ways I think sharpened him to the killer he became. It instilled values that remained with him in Cerberus, such as when he berates Bates for abandoning his squad and calls him a traitor. Kai doesn't betray-- he's quite literally ride or die.

Also? The ninja sword is super dumb because Kai is Chinese and the swords and Phantom's themselves are designed to appear Japanese in aesthetic. Ninjas= Japanese, but China did have their own sect of Assassins which I believe gave birth to Wu Ching as a type of Martial Arts? Or was drawn from it hmm

To keep to accuracy, Kai would have trained more towards their martial art techniques which focuses on close combat and quick movements, as well as the use of dual blades called butterfly swords (You'd likely recognize them as a set of rogue daggers).

That's all for that meta! Phew. If anyone actually read to the end, hey wassup, hope you enjoyed, and take most of this with a grain of salt since it's my headcanons and background work :) Thank you again for reading!

[leejihoonownsmyheart]

Needy

Request: hi I was wondering if you can do a smut where scoups is busy doing something (practicing/working in the studio/playing video games) and u keep bothering him bc u want his attention so when he finally gives u his attention u walk away provoking him? I hope you're having a great day/night and if you do the request thank you

 -

A lot could be said about Choi Seungcheol.

He was a smart guy. Dedicated as all hell to everyone around him and would give anything to the people he was around. You really loved that about him. Sure, you knew that he pushed himself too hard, and he was always doing too much to please others, but you still loved him so much for all that he would do for people.

He was always so attentive of everyone around him. Always so careful to make sure that everyone felt included in everything that he did with them, and it was partly because he was such a clingy boy. You adored the way that he would hold onto your hand when you were with the other boys. The way he would pout when you gave someone else more attention than him.

The jokes he made like: “Don’t tell other people that you love them. You can only talk to me” only to immediately retract it, insisting it was a joke and of course you could talk to other people always made your heart skip a beat. It was the little ways that he told you he loved you that you adored the most, and Choi Seungcheol would both scream that he was in love with you and quietly tell you in the cutest ways possible.

But when it came down to a busy schedule, Seungcheol really could just lose himself in work. You didn’t think he even realized sometimes just how concentrated he got. He only heard what he needed to hear- his brain filtered out things that he didn’t necessarily need to process at that moment without himself even really realizing what was going on.

The boyfriend that you were used to seeing bug Jihoon, and mess around with Soonyoung, and tease Chan was practically gone when a comeback got too near. Instead he was serious and calculated, and while he never said it (and you would never say it to his face) he tended to get a bit too busy for you.

He stopped answering your texts as quickly, and he stopped inviting you over for a quick dinner with the rest of the boys. In fact, he practically became a non-existent boyfriend for about a month at a time.

It never particularly bothered you. After all you knew what he was like during pre-promotional and promotional periods and Seungcheol liked spending time with you just as much (maybe even more) as you did with him.

Post-promotional periods you could barely get him to let go of your hand enough to go to the bathroom he was so happy just to make up for all the time he hadn’t been with you.

But this time around it was different.

You felt like you needed to be around him. All you wanted was to hear his voice, and hold his hand, and sit at his side playing with his hair.

You weren’t really used to feeling this clingy, and honestly the need to be around Seungcheol while also reminding yourself that you shouldn’t bother him drove you crazy- to the point where you just couldn’t handle it anymore. You swallowed your pride and sent him a text that you would be swinging by, before briskly swinging over to Pledis.

“Hey Cheol,” you greeted your voice soft. He barely acknowledged you- glancing over his shoulder as he spoke over the phone to someone. His eyebrows were furrowed in concentration, but when his eyes landed on you, his expression softened just a little bit. He raised a finger and pointed towards a couch on the other side of the room.

You hmphed at the thought.

You had come all this way to see him not to sit on some couch on the other end of the room. You pressed your lips together in annoyance, and then wandered over to him- despite where he had gestured for you to go.

You wrapped your arms loosely around his neck, entangling your fingers in his hair. He didn’t really acknowledge your presence, so you buried your face in his neck and pressed your lips into the crook of it.

Again, he didn’t really acknowledge your presence. He cut you a small look, like he wanted you to go away, but really just focused on his phone call. You let yourself remain settled there for a moment- enjoying sitting there with him.

You pressed another kiss to his neck hoping it would make him hang up the phone.

“What do you mean you don’t see us on the schedule?”

You grunted.

Yeah maybe that wasn’t very likely.

You slumped your body against Seungcheol’s, letting your head lay limply on his shoulder. He didn’t even glance at you as he continued his phone conversation.

“We set this up with you guys months ago, how could you just tell me that this was going to be a problem?”

You reached forward, with your fingers lazily, brushing Seungcheol’s dark bangs out of his face as he spoke. Your fingers lowered to his lips, and all you wanted to do was lean forward and kiss him but with him so busy with his dumb phone call you knew that you shouldn’t.

And most days you really wouldn’t have continued to bother Seungcheol. After all, you knew better then to tease him. Most days you would get to your feet and stretch out your arms and go find someone else from Seventeen to bug until Seungcheol came looking for you when he was less busy.

It was always worth waiting for Choi Seungcheol after all.

But today, you just weren’t feeling like waiting. You felt mischief bubbling up in your chest.

You had missed him all day, and his lips looked so pretty.

And since Seungcheol and you hadn’t spent much time alone recently, he certainly hadn’t... Well, played with you in a while. And you really missed touching him- and having him touch you. Plus, you two were currently all alone.

You shifted yourself so that you were no longer behind him. Instead you plopped yourself right in his lap, tentatively placing your hand on his thigh.

The action got you no reaction, which made your head tilt to the side ever so slightly. Seungcheol wasn't even looking at you.

It seemed like Seungcheol was so occupied with whatever he was doing that he wasn’t even noticing your touch at all. You narrowed your eyes, and let your thumb fall towards his inner thigh, rubbing small circles into it. As you did so, Seungcheol did move.

But it was only so that he could reach around you to type something on his computer. He pressed his phone up to his ear with his shoulder, and his tongue slipped out of his mouth in concentration, pinning you between him and his desk.

His face was close to yours, but you could tell that despite the proximity he wasn’t really seeing you in his peripheral.

“Look we are Seventeen for crying out loud. We have a busy schedule and I can’t just move days just because you couldn’t schedule us right.”

It didn’t help that Seungcheol was getting angry.

You could hear the edge to his voice as he spoke and watching the way his fingers clenched in anger at the others was embarrassingly enough sending heat through your body. You loved the way that he sounded when he got down to business. Enjoyed it when he didn’t take no for answer.

You really, really wished he was getting so dominate with you.

You wanted him to be strict with you. You wanted to be able to misbehave, and you wanted to see what he was going to do about it.

You let your eyes lower to Seungcheol’s chest, and then consequently even further down to his pants. You frowned slightly in concentration, taking a deep breath before you rose your hands to the belt buckle on his pants.

You risked another glance up at Seungcheol, who was still staring past you at his computer screen.

“Yes, that is what I keep telling you. It has to be that day.”

You then looked back down at his pants and unbuckled his belt. When there weren’t any instant consequences for the action, you happily unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, reaching your hand into his pants eagerly. You were quick to wrap your fingers around his cock and pull it out of his underpants.

At this point you were so focused on his cock that his phone conversation was completely background noise. You ran your fingers up the length of his cock distractedly, your thumb lightly teasing his tip distractedly as you felt it harden in your hand.

You were about to move so that you could play with your cock more when suddenly Seungcheol’s hand tightened around your shoulder. You jumped a little, your fingers tightening around the base of his cock.

“What are you doing?” He murmured, his lips inches from your ear. You looked up at him, a meek expression on your face when you realized he was done with his phone call.

“I- uh.”

He raised his eyebrow at you, and you swallowed hard.

“I was just-”

Seungcheol lowered his hand down to your wrist and pulled your hand from his cock, giving you a look.

“I know I’ve been busy, but I still have a lot of work to get done,” he murmured, his voice soft. You hated that- how soft his voice was. He was still being really easy on you, and you knew that it was because he felt bad for not giving you enough attention.

You watched in disappointment as Seungcheol’s attention turned back to his computer and he dialed a new number on his cellphone. You listened to the phone ring for a few seconds before finally the person on the other line answered.

“Well, I solved the problem with Music Bank,” he murmured. “But you’re going to need to send our music over to them early because they’re a-”

As Seungcheol spoke you slid from his lap, getting down under the table. He didn’t seem to mind this- you supposed all he really noticed was you getting off of his lap and he leaned forward to focus on his work. You quietly let out a breath of relief and settled yourself on your knees between Seungcheol’s legs. You waited until he wasn’t speaking to Jihoon, but was instead listening and typing, and then you leaned forward and sucked his cock into his mouth.

You could feel Seungcheol’s body tense up under your hands, but you paid it no mind as you began to slowly work his cock in and out of your mouth. Seungcheol’s fingers lowered down to you again, but you swatted them away, and instead looked up at him with a coy expression on your face.

“Is Jihoon calling your name?” You asked him.

Seungcheol opened his mouth but it only made Jihoon repeat Seungcheol’s name again over the phone. He looked conflicted.

“Sorry, yeah?” He asked softly. “I guess I got a little distracted. You need what?”

As Jihoon began to speak again you returned back to sucking his cock. Your fingers squeezed at the base of his rockhard cock as you worked him in and out of your mouth. You could hear his breathing increasing and it made you feel a bit satisfied to know that you were the one who had made him feel like this...

You honestly felt good knowing that you were a distraction. You smiled to yourself, and then left his cock for a moment. You took a few soft breathes, running your fingers over his saliva-soaked cock. You looked up at him and were surprised to find him staring at you his face red.

“Yeah, that sounds good.”

His voice cracked, and he sent you a desperate expression. You knew what he wanted. He wanted you to stop. He desperately wanted you to wait until at least Jihoon was off the phone with him.

But you had been desperate for him for way too long to just stop now. You wrapped your lips around Seungcheol’s cock again and sucked him into your mouth. You waited until he was speaking again- you weren’t really sure what him and Jihoon were even talking about at this point- and this time instead of just sucking his cock, you full on deepthroated him, choking a little on him as you did so.

Seungcheol choked in the middle of his sentence, and suddenly his fingers were buried in the roots of your hair. He pulled hard bringing you off of his cock with a plop.

You noticed that his phone was on the desk, and you swallowed hard. You guessed he was done with his phone call.

“I’m telling you one more time. You need to go sit over in that couch over there and be good. I just have to fill out a few more pieces of paperwork okay?”

You pouted at him and opened your mouth to protest but you were fixed under a sharp glare.

“I said- Okay.”

You nodded and stood up.

“Okay,” you murmured back.

You sulked over to the couch that you knew Seungcheol wanted you to sit at, glancing back over your shoulder at him, hoping that he would take back his words. Regrettably enough- he did not.

You sat down on the couch and pulled out your phone in annoyance. You were so uncomfortable now. Your panties were soaked with anticipation and now you just had to sit here with absolutely no satisfaction in sight.

You were half tempted to walk over to the bathroom and just take care of yourself there. After all, knowing Seungcheol he wouldn’t want to fuck you after he got back into his work. He would get distracted and get back into his work until you finally made him quit and get some rest.

But then you had a thought.

After all, no one was going to come bother Seungcheol right now... So, who was to say that you couldn’t help yourself right then?

You stood back up and didn’t give yourself any time to think it through properly. You just slid yourself out of your pants and plopped yourself back down on the couch. You spread your legs out far and let your cold fingers brush against your swollen clit.

You bit out a whine.

The sound didn’t make Seungcheol react at all, which was a tiny bit discouraging.

You slipped your shirt off and pressed your bare back into the couch. You watched him silently, wondering if he had noticed your naked body pressed into the soft fluffy couch. He clearly hadn’t. His eyes were instead fixed on his computer screen.

You couldn’t figure out how he could be so focused on his computer when you were right over there.

You let out a soft moan and spread your legs further apart. You began to fiddle with your clit more purposefully, and the sensation was honestly a little bit distracting. For a moment you forgot why you were even touching yourself. All you could think about were your fingers and they played with yourself.

You rolled your clit around between your index finger and your thumb and let out another fluttering moan. You felt your head fall back on the couch as the fingers of your other hand trailed down your body, finding solace at your entrance. You dipped your fingers inside of your dripping wet hole and another shaky moan was ripped out of your body.

“Stop.”

The sound of Seungcheol’s voice was a bit of a surprise. You had almost forgotten he was there- but when you looked up and saw that he was staring at you with a strained expression on his face, you couldn’t help but feel satisfied with yourself.

You looked away from him and returned your attention to pushing your fingers deeper inside of you. You couldn’t believe that your pussy was so tight around the two fingers as you hadn’t initially thought it had been that long since you had fucked yourself- but you supposed that it had been a while since Seungcheol had touched you and he was the last one to push himself inside of you.

The reminder said a shiver through your body.

“Fuck, Cheol, I’m really really tight for you,” you murmured, just loud enough that you assumed Seungcheol would be able to hear it if he were listening to you. Your eyes trailed back over to him and found that he was still in fact staring at you. You could see the outline of his hard cock in his pants and you pouted- wishing he had left it out for you to see. “And I’m so wet.”

You dragged your soaking wet fingers out of yourself and rose them to your lips. You slowly parted your lips, letting your tongue dip out from between them teasingly, and then you sucked your wet fingers into your mouth, moaning around the salty taste of your fluids.

“And I taste so good.”

“I said to stop,” Seungcheol repeated to your disappointment. How was he still so determined to focus on his work over you. You couldn’t understand. You felt your body deflate, and you dropped your hand back to your pussy.

“Why?” You challenged. Normally you wouldn’t dare vocalize such a defiant word, but today you were feeling especially challenging. “You’re not going to touch me. I figure I might as well satisfy myself since you won’t.”

You dipped your two fingers back into your pussy and looked away from Seungcheol, still feeling turned on, but not feeling very happy anymore.

Your body burned with annoyance at Seungcheol’s attitude towards you today. Could he really not spend the ten minutes it took to fuck you? When it had been so long since you two had last even been in the same room together?

You didn’t think it was really that much to ask of him, and as such you were pretty annoyed that he was barely even giving you the time of day.

You worked your fingers faster in and out of your body, rubbing your clit harder as you did so.

Fuck him. Who cared? You would just make him watch you cum, and then you would let him sit and work with that erection while you went and did something else. Maybe Jun would still be up to go to the-

Before you could even finish that thought, your wrist was grabbed.

Your eyes widened as you came to focus on Seungcheol’s red face in front of you. His shirt was off- when had that happened and his pants were still on, just his cock had been pulled out of the zipper. You bit back a whimper as Seungcheol pulled your hands from your body over your head. All it took was one hand to pin both of your wrists up above you.

“You want to be fucked that badly?” He demanded. “You really this desperate just for me to fuck you that you have to tease me that much?”

You whimpered again, but Seungcheol paid little mind to the noise. He pushed his cock deep inside of you without warning and you cried out at the sudden immense pleasure. Your hands curled up into balls, and your fingernails pressed hard into the skin of your palms.

“Oh fuck, fuck, fuck- Cheol,” you blurted out. He bent over you, positioning himself more comfortably between your legs before he started to thrust in you at all.

“The walls of your pussy are practically dragging my cock deeper inside of you,” he mumbled. His hand trailed distractedly up your body and his thumb flicked at one of your tits. You bit back a moan at the sound. “You really did want to be fucked, didn’t you?”

He slowly began to drag his cock out of your pussy, hissing as he did so. He seemed so turned on by simply having his cock inside of you that his fingers tightened around your tit, giving it a small tug, sending another shock of pleasure through you.

“I tried to tell you,” you managed to bite out. Your sentence was partially interrupted by Seungcheol pushing himself back into you. You moaned out and your eyes fluttered shut. “Missed you.”

“Do you even know how hard it is to ignore you?” He asked. As he spoke, he finally started to fuck you to a rhythm that he seemed to set in his head. His thrusts became faster, his hips moving with more specific movements as he fucked you. “Just you being in the same room as me is distracting. Especially when it’s been this long since I’ve fucked you.”

He moaned and dropped his head into the crook of your neck, his lips attaching themselves briefly to your collarbone. His teeth nipped at you, and it made your whole-body flush under the attention.

“I’ve wanted to take you since the minute that you stepped into this room. Imagine how hard I had to fight myself to not jump your bones the minute you started touching yourself? I haven’t gotten a damn thing done since you said hey.”

Seungcheol pulled out of you suddenly and all you could do was whine at the loss. Before you could properly complain, Seungcheol’s fingers were in your hair and he was dragging you up by it. He pushed you over the edge of the back of the couch and rested his hands on your hips.

You tried to look back at him, and one of his hands came down on your ass, hard. You yelped, but it only turned into a moan halfway through as Seungcheol lined his cock up with your pussy again. He didn’t slide in right away and it made you whine a little in desperation. You wiggled your hips pathetically- an action which just made Seungcheol chuckle.

“What a needy little slut,” he murmured softly. “Look back at me.”

You hesitated to do so, and so he slapped your ass again. You yelped a second time, and turned back over your shoulder to look at him- your face red. His fingers were wrapped around the base of his cock and he cocked an eyebrow up at you as he pumped his cock.

“Now I could just cum right here just like this,” he murmured softly. “I’ve fucked your tight pussy enough so that I could just finish right here and right now, right on your back. Tell you that you aren’t allowed to fuck yourself since you were such a brat earlier until you see me again and go back to work completely satisfied.”

You swallowed hard at the threat, but the idea of such an intense punishment was honestly almost as satisfying as the orgasm that you would surely receive whenever Seungcheol did decide to fuck you again. But you knew better then to voice your opinion at all in the matter. Instead, you waited patiently, your desperateness for his touch, approval, and cum evident enough in the way you were acting right then and there. No longer bratty and desperate for attention.

Instead you were utterly desperate to please him.

“But you really missed me, didn’t you?” Seungcheol observed quietly. “I let myself get taken too far from you when I’m at work, huh?”

You didn’t confirm or deny the words, but he seemed to come to a conclusion himself. He raised one of his hands to your shoulder and pulled you back on his dick. You let out a moan, and your fingers tightened in the couch cushion as Seungcheol began to bounce you on his cock.

Each thrust brought you closer and closer to an orgasm. You bit down on your lip to try to keep yourself quiet and to prevent yourself from being too loud, but when Seungcheol was fucking you there wasn’t really any use.

You whined and looked back at him, probably looking pretty dumb with the flustered- fucked out expression that was surely settled over your face.

“Fuck, Cheol, please,” you begged. “Want you to cum, s-so badly.”

He hummed as he fucked you, trying to look cool and collected but you could tell that he was close. He never lasted long when you begged- especially not when it had been this logn since you two had fucked.

“You want it that badly? You better promise not to be so much of a brat next time,” Seungcheol aprimanded. You whined, but before you could really complain Seungcheol’s fingers had tightened around your shoulder.

“Apologize for being a brat,” he repeated, this time more sternly. A shiver wracked itself through your body.

“I’m sorry for being a brat,” you mumbled. You let a few seconds pass before adding: “Daddy.”

That word in itself was enough to through Seungcheol over the edge. His thrusts became erratic, and hard as spurt after spurt of cum filled your pussy- and the feeling of being filled with his cum had you cumming in mere seconds.

Seungcheol’s body practically meshed with yours after a moment, his chest heaving as he breathed in and out. You smiled sloppily and let yourself fall into a heap with him on the couch- not minding that your limbs were intertwined with his.

“I missed you so much,” you murmured softly. He gave you an exhausted expression, but pulled you close to him anyways, giving you a small peck on the lips.

“I missed you too.”

[s1utspeare]

hhhnnnnggggghhh im going feral about acting choices again

ok ok ok so like. i’m working on the Zhang Daddy Rishan Kinesthetics Masterpost but also I was watching Mystic Nine yesterday to Watch His Lines and I realized that??? Fo ye???? is a Chest Lead???? so then of course I dropped everything to determine what Leads everyone in m9 has (and I’ll be doing the rest of the dmbj characters later im sure) but I HAD to share because I’m literally insane about it. 

BIT OF BACKGROUND INFORMATION (asldighaldskfj y’all are really just going to get my entire theatre degree For Free): one of the easiest ways to Get Into Character and Embody Certain Traits is to decide how your character walks. They made us do this during movement workshops EVERY TIME (another thing we did during movement workshops was lie on the floor and scream. also there was an exercise where u just stared into each other’s eyes. anyway) because it’s like the best place to start, because even if u didn’t decide ANY physicality movements for your character except for what Lead they have, that’s still going to be a really good physical indicator of traits and characterization. And basically a Lead is just what body part Goes First when you’re walking (more on this in a bit). 

Anyway, there are four main Leads: 

Head: a head lead is someone who is known for being intelligent and logical. They do most of their character action inside themselves, and reveal it to the audience through lines and words. This is probably the most common lead because it’s the easiest to do. Wu Xie is 

Chest: a chest lead literally is following their heart. They’re guided by emotions, and are often fierce and very loyal to the people they care about. They tend to do most of their character action through expression.

Hips: a hips lead is confident in their body and the way they present themselves. They are usually very physical, though not necessarily active. Hips leads can also become stomach leads or crotch leads, depending on what the actor wants to emphasize in their character (stomach is grounded, sensible, and strong; crotch is a little bit sleazier/less trustworthy a first glance; think Pangzi vs Hei Xiazi). 

Feet: feet leads are the hardest to do, because they require an actor to have very good balance and poise. Feet leads are often people of action, and unlike physical characters who will use small bits of energy to keep continuously moving over time, they usually do bursts of energy at different times. 

Sometimes actors will mix and match Leads, or emphasize an even more specific body part (i.e. shoulders instead of chest, knees instead of feet, nose instead of head), but for our purposes, these four Leads will basically cover all of our stuff. 

Also! This works on people in real life, too! A fun exercise is to try and figure out which Lead you have (I say you, because it’s REALLY difficult to tell on other people, because while you do Lead with a certain body part, it’s entirely subconscious and thus very minimal). For example, I’m a Head Lead most of the time, except when I don’t want people to talk to me, or I want attention; then I switch to a Hips Lead. My roommate is a Feet Lead, and one of my best friends is a Chest Lead.

ANYWAY BACK TO MYSTIC NINE CHARACTERS! They are??? Super interesting??? 

Fo-ye: Like I said earlier, Fo-ye is a Chest Lead which BITCH??? I’M??? HELLO??? like you would think he’d be a Feet Lead or a Head Lead, but he’s a Chest Lead! It took me the longest to figure him out, I think, because I was looking for a Head Lead, but when he walks, it’s like there’s a string pulling him forward from his pectorals, which is SUPER INTERESTING. AND LIKE. IT MAKES SENSE? like fo-ye is smart and capable and active and yada yada yada, but he’s also super passionate? and often doesn’t think about things before he does them? He kind of just jumps in in the moment, doing whatever he thinks is best at the time, even if it comes back around to bite him. For a character with such a strong facade, that type of Lead is so revealing which puts him in very vulnerable positions, which is what it’s good that...

Ba-ye and Er-ye: are both Head Leads!! Like, ba-ye, obviously. He’s a stereotypical nerd, and they’re always Head Leads, but this bitch takes it to another level. Just look at him: 

Head Lead lookin-ass. Anyway. But Ba-ye and Er-ye balance Fo-ye’s Chest Lead out very well (it’s funny that it takes two of them though). Er-ye’s Head Lead is also interesting, because it comes out a LOT when he’s doing opera. This could partially be because of the headdresses and costuming, but also I think that he’s very precision-oriented, and is constantly calculating everything in his head before he ever moves at all. 

Zhang Rishan: babes is a Foot Lead. Like. He’s so funny. If you watch him run closely his feet come to a stop before everything else and it looks like wind’s blowing him backward. It makes sense though?? especially considering how tense he is all the time?? like sir please calm down, ur so tightly wound, it’s exhausting. Makes the Feet Lead make sense tho, cause like. he’s ready to GO. ready for action! also it makes his connection with Ba-ye even better cause like??? they’re Opposite Leads??? and i love that for them.

Chen Pi: Chen Pi is actually a natural Head Lead, which was super surprising to me, because he seems like he’d be a Chest, but I think he gets most of that from Er-ye and copying him and his methods of doing things. HOWEVER when he’s trying to intimidate people (and especially when he has to deal with Idiots like Officer Lu and Henry Cox, those bitches), he switches to a really heavy Hip Lead to make him seem sturdier than he actually is. 

Yue Xinyue: I haven’t quite puzzled Xinyue out yet, but I’m pretty sure she’s a Chest Lead. Like Chen Pi, when she’s in disguise, especially as a man, she switches to Hips, which is a good strategy, since men are more likely to be Hip Leads, as their center of gravity is lower. 

Yatou: my beautiful and perfect wife. Of course she’s a Chest Lead. Her heart is so big. I love her (also emphasizes her compatibility with Er-ye hehe).

My point that I’m getting at (besides characterization) is that almost NOTHING that you see onscreen is an accident. Not to like, put actors on a pedestal (bc the REAL magic is the tech people), but acting is hard when you really do it like, for real. Rehearsals for filmed shows often take anywhere between 1-3 months because you’ve got to get ALL OF THE CHARACTERIZATIONS and physicality and everything figured out so that when it’s in front of the camera you’re ready to go (and that’s not even TOUCHING ON fight choreo, which I also love). As much fun as acting is, and as easy as it looks, I can guarantee that there’s a million things going through each of their minds, including things as simple as which body part goes first (also it’s SUPER awkward to go against your natural lead lmao, so like. Props to everyone i love them). 

Anyway! That’s the m9 main cast (i didn’t do the antagonists cause most of the time they’re Hip Leads anyway and also i didn’t want to go watch clips of Cox walking around, that’s boring). I think that @cross-d-a​, @jockvillagersonly​, and @lacommunarde​ were specifically interested in more acting meta, but I hope you all enjoy it as well!!! 

[absolutebl]

What apps / platforms / sites do you use for watching BL? I'm happy to pay a subscription fee. Thank you for your help!

Unfortunately there isn’t a one stop shop for BL. Not even just Thai BL. So here’s a big ol’ resource post for you. 

YouTube - Oxygen etc...

Mostly I use YouTube for things like Oxygen, and fannish content like music vids, interviews, and talk shows. I suggest subscribing to the production studio’s and distributor’s channels there (this is a good way to show support as # of subs increases exposure + ad revenue). Even if you don’t intend to watch on YouTube, subscribing helps the studios a lot. 

Globe Studios - Gaya 

GMMTV - 2gether, Gifted, I’m Tee, Chonthon + OffGun, TayNew, BrightWin, and SingtoKrist promo vehicles  

Mauve Series - Oxygen 

Mind Trio - Calculating Love

Oxin Films - My Day 

Star Hunter - The Moment, Gen Y 

Studio Wabi Sabi - Until We Meet Again, Between Us,  Love Mechanics, Seven Project, Love By Chance, The En of Love 

Wayufilm Production - My Bromance  

WHYRU Channel 

Lovely Writer 

I like YouTube’s mobile interface best since I prefer not to watch on a PC. I don’t have a YouTube monthly subscription, but I’ve considered it. I’m not really down with YouTub’s corporate culture or politics. The value for money hasn’t evened any of this out for me yet, especially as YouTube monthly sub is higher than most every other platform - with less value ad content. 

YouTube is unstable for BL. Some shows never get there, and proprietary distributors like GMMTV have a history of pulling all their content arbitrarily (e,g, Our Skyy has been down for months and only just showed up again). Both TharnType and Why R U are currently down. Usually, studios start jacking around with the older shows when newer spin offs are launching or going into promo. 

Where else to get ‘em? 

It really depends on the show. 

Thai Distribution Direct - TharnType 2

TharnType 2 is being made available direct via the originating Thai distributor. I encourage you to watch it there so they can get the ad revenue: https://tv.line.me/tharntypetheseries 

* To be smart, any Thai distributor worth their salt should take this tactic and then move the content, with a relaunch and “extras” over to their YouTube channels say after 6 months or so (if they can’t get a secondary distributor like Viki or Netflx intersted). It would maximize exposure, fan interest, and revenue. 

** From an industry stand point, I wouldn’t expect TT2 to STAY available direct from Line indefinitely. So watch it NOW.  

Netflix - SOTUS & Love Sick 1

SOTUS & Love Sick first seasons are on Netflix, with follow up seasons on YouTube. You need a Netflix account to watch. You can also find them on YouTube but if you have Netflix, watch them there. 

Also these are good ones to push onto possible new BL recruits. The more watchers the better, since maybe it will get Netflix to fund and buy more queer content. I have concerns with Netflix corporate, but they are one of the few actively funding queer romance projects right now, so... yeah?

Viki - Love By Chance 2

LBC2 is on Viki, behind a paywall. But since Viki doesn’t have very many Thai BLs (they have some from Taiwan like the HIStory series), I haven’t subscribed. I’m waiting for them to hold enough IP to make it worth my while. Also, I have reservations about LBC2 and Mame’s writing in general, so just LBC2 isn’t enough for me, personally. 

Viki is a subsidiary of Japanese company Rakutan which also holds Kobo, and I like what they do to go up against US based conglomerates. (All cards on the table, I’ve visited Rakutan corporate.) We will see if they really double down and focus on BL. If they do, I’ll sub. 

Fan Subs & Uploads - Cherry Magic 

Cherry Magic (Doutei dato Mahoutsukai ni narerurashii) out of Japan has an excellent fan subber doing the bulk of the work to make this accessible. I watch it through them, and I tip them $ for their labor. If you watch this one and like it, I encourage you to do the same. https://irozuku.org/fansub/tag/cherry-magic/ 

Less Savory Options - Daily Motion & Drama Cool

You can find ripped and rebranded low grade eng subs if you are desperate from Daily Motion. I tend to use Bento Box’s channel or BL Series HD. You can find hard to reach stuff like He’s Coming to Me (HIGHLY recommended), ITTSAY, MGYG, and LBC2 there. But the content originators aren’t getting any money from it, so it’s a bit of an ethical dilemma.

How do we get more made if these don’t earn money? And yet, how do we watch when they aren’t distributed internationally? 

The other option in this same vein in Drama Cool, it’s the only place I have found Friend Forever. 

How to keep track? 

Frankly the best source for all this kind of information is MyDramaList which does exactly as it says, allows you to organize, kept track of, and discuss Asian dramas. 

There is a thriving BL community there. Commenters will share links with each other. I don’t have an account but my spies do.  

Hope this helps. 

File this under my questionable relationship with international DRM and IP. 

No tags to protect the guilty. 

[dvlwthn]

“  i  think  i  am  a  better  ghost  –-                than  i  am  a  human  being  .  ”

Is that SEBASTIAN STAN? No, that’s just VIKTOR MICHAIL EVANOFF. They were born on 13/08/1733 and are a HUNTER living in Northknot Town. They work as a EMT. Some say they're RESOURCEFUL and OBSERVANT, but I’ve heard others say they're CLOSED-OFF and UNSTABLE. When you think of HIM, don’t you think of  HANDS  TAINTED  RED  AND  A  MIND  FILLED  WITH  GUILT  ,  CONFUSED  RAGE  WITH  NO  OUTLET  ,  SCREAMS  OF  THE  PAST  FILLING  THE  NIGHT  AIR?

A E S T H E T I C

HAUNTING  SCREAMS  OF  THE  PAST  .  WAKING  UP  WITH  NO  MEMORY  .  THE  OVERWHELMING  FEELING  OF  DROWN  ONCE  THE  PAST  TRIES  TO  CATCH  UP  WITH  YOU  .  DRIVING  FAST  UNDER  THE  MIDNIGHT  SKY  .  SLEEP  BEING  UNKNOWN  .  TO  DIE  WOULD  BE  A  PRIVILEGE  .  ACTING  OFF  EMOTIONS  BECAUSE  IT’S  ALL  HE’S  EVER  KNOWN  .

Q U O T E S

“  i  will  not sleep  .  i  cannot  sleep  .  i  cannot  hear  those  screams  again    .   ”   –  unknown..

“  there  are  all  these  moments  you  don’t  think  you  will  survive  and  then  you  survive  .   ”   –  david levithan.

“  you  don’t  get  to  die  and  be  reborn  the  same  .  you  come  back  ,  but  you  come  back  wrong  .  this  is  the  price  you  pay  for  resurrection  .   ”   – nathaniel orion.

“  i  like  the  scars  because  i  like  the  stories  .  bravery  ,  stupidity  ,  pain  . . .  none  of  them  come  free  .  ”  –  jessica  martinez

M U S I C    P L A Y E R

“   life  isn't  always  what  you  think  it'd  be  .  turn  your  head  for  one  second  and  the  tables  turn  . . .  and  i  know  ,  i  know  that  i  did  you  wrong  but  will  you  trust  me  when  i  say  that  i'll  make  it  up  to  you  somehow  ,  somehow  .  ”   i’m so sorry by imagine dragons.

“   somebody  make  me  feel  alive  and  shatter  me  .  so  cut  me  from  the  line  –-  dizzy  ,  spinning  endlessly  .  somebody  make  me  feel  alive  and  shatter  me  !  ”   shatter me by lindsey stirling.

“   i've  become  so  numb  .  i  can't  feel  you  there  –  become  so  tired  . . .  so  much  more  aware  .  i'm  becoming  this  .  all  i  want  to  do  is  be  more  like  me  and  be  less  like  you  .  ”   numb by linkin park.

P E R S O N A L I T Y  

+ calculated, protective, and intelligent

- self-critical, detached, and secretive

viktor has always been pretty smart, it’s something that helped him a long way. he picked up on things easily which came from always keeping busy. it’s how he dealt with a lot of his issues... by just not dealing with them and finding something to do.  

after coming to terms with everything he’s done, viktor was really hard on himself and found it hard to connect with people. he was good at pretending, but didn’t think he deserved real happiness.

what maybe come as a surprise to some people, is how charming he can be. it takes awhile for him to warm up to people, but once he does, they see more of this side to him. his charming and playful side. and once they start to see it, he becomes very loyal and protective of them. 

H E A D C A N O N S

001. viktor michail evanoff was born to michail and helena evanoff, not they he’d remember that. he also had a younger brother named ivan who, if he could remember,  he’d miss more than anything in the world. while he may  not remember it, his family was killed by a couple of rouge vampires who did it for fun.  viktor had just gotten home from fighting in some war he couldn’t remember. he was celebrating his return home with his family. if he really really tried to remember, all he’d come up with is screaming and the colour red.

002. when he woke up after being turned into a hunter, he remembered nothing of his life. there was a block on his mind. the only thing he could remember was rage. they had made him the perfect killing machine. he was only told to kill, that it’s what he was meant to do. to protect humans. yet, during that time, he didn’t care about protecting, he just needed to kill. he followed his gut and killed plenty of supernatural beings without an ounce of hesitation. including the two witches that had been there when he woke. that told him his job was to kill. they hadn’t been part of the ritual, they were just the ones taking care of him while in transition to hunter.

003. for his first life as a hunter, he didn’t even know his own name. he didn’t need to know it. he travelled all over the world killing any and all supernatural beings he came across. he picked up many different languages during this time. despite not being social, he knew it was important to know what was being said around him to help him hunt down these things. 

004. during his second lifetime, things were pretty much the same, except now he was hunting down witches with the intention of finding someone to remove the block on his mind. no one ever could and he grew more and more frustrated about it. which caused his rage to become out of control again. he did, however, finally learn his name. not that it helped him cause he could find no information on himself.

005. after coming back for the third time, he started to become pissed off for a different reason. he could only wonder when he’d not come back. when he’d no longer have to being a killing machine. he was ALREADY tired of it. but he kept at it because it was all he knew. it was during this lifetime that he had gotten hurt and stumbled upon northknot for the first time. his urge to kill was going crazy, yet no one tried to hurt him. in fact, someone had offered to help him. it left him confused. he knew he could kill anyone in the town, he was too hurt. but he planned to. he did. he figured he’d act however he needed to survive and kill as many creatures as he could once he was better. but his healing process took longer than he thought and he had time to see what this town really was. this weren’t creatures coming together planing ways to kill humans... not this was PEOPLE coming together to live. to survive. to hide from humans. to hide from him. these were families just being. it wasn’t them that was wrong with the world, it was him. so when he was FINALLY healed, he left, promising to never come back.

006. the fourth time he came back, he didn’t want to hunt anymore. he remembered his third life so vividly and intensely that as soon as he woke up, he had actually just started crying. thinking of everything he did before. of all the PEOPLE he killed without even questioning it. so this life time, he knew he had to do better... which is when he started practicing medicine. he had known basic things from having to take care of himself, but now he was trying to help others... but the urge was still there, so he took what he knew and was learning and applied it to fighting still, becoming a medic in the army. it was the perfect way to ease himself into doing better. 

007. since then, he has come back a couple more times and has had his slips up where his instincts got the better of him. but he still continued to try. he didn’t want to end up like the monsters he hunted. so he made sure to only hunt those who truly deserved it. all while helping those in need.

008. he has spent a lot of time travelling the world and learning as much as he could. languages, culture, history, everything. the man hated NOT KNOWING considering how much he didn’t know about himself. so he tried to make up for it by knowing everything else. 

009. the moment heard the news about what was happening in northknot, the man didn’t hesitate in making his way back. he was surprised with himself, he really was. but he needed to help, especially help this town. 

C O N N E C T I O N S

Best Friend. they met while viktor was hunting. this person had been hunting the same person. surprisingly the two managed to get along pretty well. mainly just due to them being able to work so well together. they could have been on a better path already and tried helping viktor through his time trying to figure it out... or viktor went through his change first and helped them when they figured it out for themselves.

Child Like Figure. viktor met this person after he already started seeing that supernatural creatures were more than he was told. the two ended up helping each other. they both came from a pretty tough background and ended up teaching each other what a family was meant to be. [ closed ; upcoming ]

Enemy. before seeing the error of his ways, viktor killed a lot of innocent people. this person would be someone connected to one of those people and are looking for revenge. 

Ex. what started as two people just using each other for sex, ended up with one of them caring more than planned. so things between them stopped. however, they started up again when they ran into each other a month or so later. this time, they both fell for each other. but things ended when a group of vampires attacked them. this was when he got really injured and ended up in northknot the first time. he wasn’t aware of the fact that this person was changed into a vampire. neither are aware that the other is alive. 

Someone He Saved. could be someone he saved in town (working as an emt) or someone he saved before coming to town. he checks up on them from time to time, just to make sure they’re okay.

[pandapupremade]

Danger (Part 2)

WORDS: 1,305 (three more words than part 1)

WARNINGS: Mentions of explosions/weapons/evil plans basically

PART 1 HERE

Only one more part to go also Flim actually shows up this time. aka self ship time and lots of Darkwing VS Negaduck moments. reblogs very appreciated <3

————

     It never was as easy as it seemed for the Fearsome Five to succeed, and the fifth and most powerful member knew this well. Still didn't mean he was happy when they failed.

     "Curse those ingrates," Negaduck grumbled once his feet were firmly on the ground. Having landed his strangely designed aircraft on the convention center roof, he could now go downstairs and blend into the crowds. This was no trouble for an expert criminal like himself, but the clock was ticking. How long did he have? Less than twenty-five minutes. Why did he come here at all? None of your concern.

     Marching  grumpily down the stairwell, he only almost tripped on his cape once. Okay, maybe twice. It was a small price to pay for fashion...But hey, his hat blocked the glare of the sun on morning drives nicely. And possibly his line of sight in general. Ah, wait, there was a more serious matter here! There were a stupid amount of bombs about to go off, and likely at least a hundred people in this convention. 

     Er, not that he, Negaduck, gave a flying duck about the majority of those people but...There was just one he wanted to - uh, help? Was that the word? Rescue? No, not something so dramatic...Who did he think he was acting like right now? A hero? He shivered at the thought, reaching the convention area. Seriously, the only thing that could make this whole situation worse would be someone mistaking him for the sickeningly heroic counterpart of his known as -

     "DARKWING DUCK!"

     He jolted, spinning on his heel. Had someone...? No, no, it was okay. Nobody saw him...Oh, but Darkwing Duck WAS over there. Negaduck slipped into the crowds, watching his goody-two-shoes version standing at a PODIUM of all things. What an egotistical...Negaduck paused.

     Ah, this might just be the opportunity he needed.

     "...and so, fair citizens of St. Canard," Darkwing was saying, his voice echoing into the mic, "Along with buying some priceless art from the booths here, you can rest easy at night in your beds, knowing that the terror that flaps in the night will in fact, be always vigilant. Always alert!..."

     "Always late to the party." In a moment's notice, Negaduck yanked the mic from Darkwing and pushed him to the ground.  The people of the convention gasped.

    "W-w-wha - NEGADUCK?!" Darkwing's eyes were wide, then narrowed as he jumped to his webbed feet, "I-I mean, of course! Y-you were always there, this whole time, you were-"

     "Actually just got here." Negaduck looked at the crowd, gripping the microphone. "Attention, St. Canard! This entire Southern section of the city has been rigged with bombs by yours truly, Negaduck."

      At this declaration, there were gasps and murmuring amount the crowd. Fearful ones that would normally fill Negaduck with delight, and admittedly still sorta did. But right now, his eyes seemed to survey the group of people as if seeking a particular person...

     But he wouldn't find the person before a fist came flying at his face from the side and he was knocked off the podium. People around began to scatter. 

     "I should've known you'd show your unsightly, unappealing mug, Negaduck!" exclaimed Darkwing Duck, lifting the other by his collar and pulling him in close and personal. "What's on your awful agenda this time?!"

      "...I just told you."

      Darkwing stared blankly. Negaduck sighed. "I was GOING to send you a message, but you know...Destroying this stupid convention might not be so bad if it gets rid of you too." He gave a sharp smirk. "According to my calculations, you have fifteen minutes to evacuate this half of your precious St. Canard before some very innocent people get hurt." 

      Technically, he had nineteen, but Negaduck liked to round time limits down.  Regardless of the specifics, you could see Darkwing's color drain from his face.        "H-h-half - half the city?!"

     "...You really weren't listening, were you."

    "Y-you'll never get away with it!...What kind of evil has possessed you?!"      "A fearsome evil.Now let GO!" Smacking foreheads with Darkwing, Negaduck broke free and ran for it. He didn't look back. Didn't have the seconds to spare. Unfortunately, the dunce would soon be hot on his trail. Years of slapstick comedy hardened a man...or duck.

     "C-come b-b-back and fight, you coward!"

     "Sorry, you purple annoyance, but I've got bigger matters to attend to. Like not getting blasted to smithereens!" 

      As he turned a corner, he reached into his coat and pulled out a mysteriously hidden grappling hook and fired up at the ceiling. On his way up, he knocked over a display of free paint samples - spilling them in time for Darkwing to slip and slide his way into several OTHER displays.

       "LOSER!" shouted Negaduck, only to...well, how to say this delicately? He smashed into the ceiling because he was not paying attention. On his way down, he only felt a little bit of shame and a lot of pain.  And when he smacked into the ground, well we can assume it hurt his pride (and his body) even more.

      He groaned and struggled to his hands and knees...Could this possibly get any -

       "...Negsy?"

      His eyes shot open. That voice...He looked up to see a pink flamingo in front of him.

        "Um...W-what are you d-doing here?"

       Negaduck's hands trembled on the ground for a moment, before he used them to push to his feet - clumsily. "Well, fancy meeting you here, little dove...." He grinned, though, and seized the bird's wrist. "Good thing."

      "W-wha- wait...! W-where are we - ?"

      "Unhand that civilian, you sneaky scoundrel!" Ah, a paint-splattered Darkwing Duck had made his way over. Negaduck groaned loudly, released his captive, and reached into his coat again - this time pulling out...Something that really shouldn't have fit into his coat -

     WHRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

      And just like that, there was two ducks in combat. Okay, actually Negaduck was just swinging his chainsaw, and Darkwing was dodging for his life.      "W-woah, woah! Can't we - can't we talk this out?!"

    "I Don't. Have. Time. For. THIS!" Negaduck swung with each word. At long last, Darkwing lost his footing, and Negaduck seized his throat...

    "N-Negsy!" A pink hand had grabbed onto Negaduck's cape. "St-stop it!" 

      It was the Flamingo.

     "....N-Negsy?"  Darkwing choked out, and dropped limp to the floor as Negaduck released him, gasping for air. "W-wh-"

     "Flim- "

    "W-what are you doing here, Negsy?" Flim gripped his cape tighter. "You kn-know I have a panel here, and..." She blinked. "Oh my gosh, is - is this why the convention was in a panic?"

     "Smart, aren'tcha...This place is going to be going sky-high within - oh, I dunno - ten minutes."

     "W-what?! Why would you -?"

      "It wasn't me, it was the incompetent lot that works for me." He put the chainsaw over his shoulder, "If that's all your questions, then can we PLEASE get out of here?"

     "W-we should evacuate people first..." Flim shook their head. "I-I'm not leaving if other people aren't!"

     "Oh, how sweet and noble of you." Negaduck gagged, grabbing her hand again. He began to pull her along. "Leave the extras to Deadwing here."

       "D-don't call him names, Negsy..." To be fair, Darkwing was looking pretty dead on the floor there. Still, Flim tried to pull free again. "H-he's hurt, thanks t-to you! Just help him evacuate people..."

       Negaduck looked increasingly irritated, and glared at Flim....But in a few moments, his expression became...Softer? Less angry, at least. He averted his eyes.

       "....Fine, little dove. I'll play your evacuation game. But then you're coming with me."

     "D-deal!"

    "W-w-wait! No deal, no -no deal!" Darkwing cried, butting in between them and physically pushing them apart, "Y-you can't just agree to be a HOSTAGE!"

     "U-um, Mr. Darkwing -" Flim began, but Negaduck bopped Darkwing on the head with the blunt of his chainsaw, and the hero fell limp once again.

     This was gonna be a long ten minutes.

[egle0702]

[TRANS] GQ June ‘20 - Wooyoung Interview

2PM Jang Wooyoung: “I lived hard like crazy”

2020.05.21 INTERVIEW

Wooyoung has blazed through life, but he also knows how to be quiet. That’s why he’s smart and strong. Like steel that has been repeatedly heated and cooled down.

You’re attentively monitoring during the shooting, has anything changed since you’ve been discharged from the military? My face hasn’t changed or anything like that. Rather than that, I’m just amazed. I had no idea I would be shooting a pictorial so soon after the discharge.

I suppose there must’ve been so many things you wanted to do. Every time I had some time off in the army, my head felt overwhelming. What should I do next? How should I live? All sorts of thoughts flooded in. In order to not have that time wasted, I transferred those thoughts and worries into written words. At first, there was a lot of embarrassing content, even for me. But it got better after a while. Aside from my future plans, I also looked back on my interpersonal relationships and my way of life. I thought whether I have lived well, whether I haven’t made mistakes when dealing with others.

I can feel your determination. In the army, there are a lot of kids who are younger than me. If I ask them about their worries, they would usually say: “You’ve already achieved everything, you don’t know how we feel.” We might come from a different starting point, but the fear of a beginning is the same. I’m more afraid compared to when I was 17 or 20 and just honestly ran towards my dreams.

You’re 32 now. In your opinion, what privilege does this age give you? Disregarding how you’ve spent your 10s and 20s, I think it gives you the chance to be kinder. You could say that you become mature. You become a better and stronger person when you look back at your past mistakes and experiences. If you add a drop of that 20s spirit into the mix, it’d be even better.

What was Jang Wooyoung like in his 20s? I was busy filling myself up, and then pouring everything out the moment I was full.

You’ve lived hard; after all, your work requires you to keep on showing something to the public. Generally speaking, I could divide my 20s into “before” and “after” by placing the mark on when I was 25. Right after the debut, I really lived and worked hard. Back then, there was a saying “killer schedule,” and the saying wasn’t a lie. I worked hard and was extremely busy, but I’m thankful for it. When else you’d be able to live like that. Compared to my efforts, the popularity achieved was great, I also made money. But once I turned 25; shall I call it adolescence? It was a mess. I wasn’t present in my life. I considered dropping everything and going back to my hometown in Busan.

But that didn’t happen. There’s only one thing that proves my existence; and that was the reason I pulled myself together. “I’m a member of 2PM, I cannot betray 2PM.” From that moment on, the meaning of “let’s live hard” changed. Making sure that I wouldn’t cause harm to others, I had fun, met a lot of people, and decided to learn a lot of things including drawing. Through feeling and experiencing as much as possible, I wanted to awaken the senses within me. I lived hard like crazy.

You expressed those feelings in the song “I like” that’s included in your 2nd solo album, right? 2PM, drawing, piano; you talk about the things you like, and then you say “I’m curious about everything in this world, I want to know, I scoot off.” True. I feel strongly about that song, but every time I listen to it, I can’t help but snort. I wonder whether I really should’ve been that honest with my lyrics. On the other hand, I wonder how hard it must’ve been. I feel sorry for Jang Wooyoung from that time.

What are you curious about these days? Laundry know-how. Haha.

I heard you say you’re into laundry in the video interview just now, too. I’m nurturing my daily life skills. I want to try and deal with things like laundry and cooking on my own, without any help.

Aren’t you curious why 2PM’s “My House” that was released 5 years ago is suddenly riding a new wave of popularity? It’s definitely something we’re thankful for. I think about it this way. 2PM as group never did anything by force. At first, we showed high level performances that could be practically carried out by young men in their early 20s. We danced, sang, and did acrobatic performances. Brimming with energy, we sang straightforward love songs. After that, we toned down on that power a bit. We began telling sad love stories with our eyes in love, and then we arrived at “My House.” Like a natural process of a brat growing into a mature and charismatic lover. I saw a comment that said “I’m sorry, I’ve become your fan just now,” but I’m actually thankful because it feels like these people have recognized the things 2PM have done in our natural flow.

It’s your 13th year since your debut. How does it feel when you hear that someone has just found out about 2PM? It’s only natural that someone doesn’t know us. The general flow of the trend changes really fast. The competition is also fierce, so you need put a lot of effort if you want to appeal to the masses. But then suddenly, we’re back into the spotlight through “My House.” In the middle of a hiatus no less. I think it’s a miracle.

Aside from “My House,” what other song comes to mind if you had to perform it again? I want to try and pour my entire soul into performing “Without U” that was released 10 years ago. I was responsible for the part where I had to make my singing feel like crying out loud, but back in the days I was the only one to lip sync because the situation with my voice go so bad, I even had vocal cord nodules. I’m still very disappointed I couldn’t perform it live.

2PM has reached the top, your skills were also acknowledged. How do you see yourself in the context of Korean music scene? Hmm, I can’t think of anything else than “Korean idols.” Our activities haven’t always been smooth, but I’m proud of it.

I heard that the meaning of your group’s name is the “hottest time of the day.” When was Jang Wooyoung the hottest? There was a concert in Germany in 2013, commemorating the 130th anniversary of the establishment of diplomatic relations between Korea and Germany. We performed together with senior Lee Mija. I was shocked when I saw her rehearsal. It’s already amazing that she’s still actively performing, but I could feel that she’s constantly striving to sing well. At that, I couldn’t help but freeze and promise myself “Jang Wooyoung, pull yourself together, and work hard.”

You’re the type who learns everything first-hand by experiencing it, right? I heard that you sought out senior Choi Baekho after watching his documentary to share your worries about music, even though you’ve never met him before. That was when I was going through that “adolescence” in my 20s. I felt consoled after watching senior Choi Baeho’s documentary, but there were still things I was frustrated about. So, I contacted him because I wanted to know how he managed to endure everything through his long years in the music scene. Here’s what he said during our first meeting: “My songs will keep on getting better with age. Just like the songs I sang in my 40s were more beautiful than the ones I did in my 30s, I’m heading towards being complete.” When I heard that, I felt like someone slapped me.

I think you can already give advice to someone who’s having similar worries. Have you ever experienced that? I have younger friends in Busan. We danced and dreamed of debuting together. It might sound selfish, but ever since my debut, I’ve never told them anything positive or hopeful about this line of work. When I passed the JYP audition, there was one young friend who cried together with me. Even to that friend, I said: “Can’t you please give up? I wish you didn’t suffer as much as me.” Back then it was really hard mentally and physically. Now my thoughts have changed. If you’re desperate and you’re confident that you will enjoy this constant fight with yourself, I would tell them to go for it. But I would like to tell them to come up with a wise approach to this because it’s easy to get tired and give up along the way.

You’re famous for having focused only JYP auditions. Do you still remember when you placed 1st at the 1st open audition? That must’ve been my 6th attempt to audition. Had I failed back then, I would’ve tried again. I sometimes watch the videos from that time, and I both like it and feel regret. Because the me on the screen looks somewhat tired. If I had allowed myself a little bit more freedom, stepped back and looked at the reality, I would’ve been a lot stronger kid.

What do you think you’ve done really well in life? That I’ve never calculated or analysed anything rationally in my relationships. I liked the other person without knowing anything about the world, and I suffered a lot when the relationship ended. I have my regrets, and I’ve also heard that it’s not a good way to approach a relationship, but someone like me just couldn’t help it. That experience made me into what I am today. I don’t regret it.

How important is love in life? If a person is of no. 1 importance, then love is no. 0. It’s a vague concept, I don’t even know if I can express love properly, but I can feel love through people.

It’s your birthday in 3 days, what would you imagine as a perfect gift? When I was serving, our company moved to a new building. The building is big, and the facilities got better. The practice rooms are also great. I wish I had my own personal space there, could be small too, where I could practice dancing all day long without bothering about others. For real.

So, shall we make an appeal? In your opinion, how much did 2PM contribute to JYP’s new company building? A lot, I think. It’s a 9-storey building, so I’d say around 4.5 floors?

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

CREDITS

·   Feature editor: Kim Youngjae

·   Photographer: Go Wontae

·   Hair: Yang Hyungshim at Yangyangsalon

·   Makeup: Kim Doyeon at Yangyangsalon

·   Editor: Heoram

 Source: GQ WEBSITE

Kor-Eng: Egle0702

[fy-2pm]

2PM’s Wooyoung GQ Korea Interview English Translation

2PM Jang Wooyoung said, “I have been living like crazy”

Wooyoung who has live hard, knows how to be quiet. That’s why he is smart and tough like hot half heated steel.

Q: You are doing a lot of monitoring while photo shooting. Is there any change before and after the army?

W: My face didn’t change much. It’s actually amazing how I am able to do a photo shoot so soon after I came back from the army.

Q: I am sure there are more things you wanted to do.

W: My mind is unstable when I have a break. What are going to do? How should I live? All kinds of thoughts came into my mind. In order not to waste time, I started writing down my thoughts. At first, there were lots of things that were embarrassing to me but slowly, it got better. In addition, I looked back to my relationships and how I lived. I thought about how I lived so that I won’t repeat my mistakes.

Q: I can feel how determine you are.

W: In the army, there were many friends who are younger than me. When I asked them about their concerns, they usually replied, “You have done it already. So you don’t know how we feel” We may have different start off but our fear to start something new is the same. To be honest, I was more scared when I started to run for my dream at 17, 20.

Q: At 32 years old, what do you think is the advantage?

W: For teenagers, no matter how you spend your twenty, I think you are given a chance to live with a better life. You can say you have grown up and you can look back to your past experiences and mistakes to become a more steadily and better than before. Adding in your spirit from the twenties, you will love it.

Q: What kind of person is Jang Wooyoung in his twenties?

W: It was filled in so quickly and I was so busy pouring out as it was filled.

Q: It’s a job where you have to keep showing more to the public. You have been working hard.

W: My twenties can be divided into first and second half with five years intervals. Since debut, I have been working really hard. At that time, we always used the term “Murder schedule” a lot and by its name, it wasn’t wrong at all. Thanks to the busy workload. When will I ever get a chance to work like that? I gained a lot of strength and money for all my efforts. However, when I turned 25, I got confused. I wasn’t living in my life. I thought about quitting and moving back to Busan, my hometown.

Q: But it didn’t happen.

W: There’s only one thing that proved my existence and it gave me determination, “I am a member of 2PM. Do not betray 2PM.” But from then on, the meaning of “Let’s work hard” has changed. I want to play hard, meet a lot of people, and learn how to paint and many other things without harming anyone. I want to feel and experiences as much as I can to wake up my inner senses. I have been living like crazy.

Q: You expressed your feelings in the song “I Like” in your second album? In the lyrics, “I am curious and want to know about everything in this world.”

W: That’s right. It’s an emotionally affectionate song but then, every time I listen to it again, I laughed. I thought if I should have been too honest when I wrote the song lyrics. On the other hand, I actually feel sorry for Jang Wooyoung back then.

Q: These days, what makes you feel curious?

W: Good ways to do my laundry. Haha.

Q: I saw in the video interview that you are into laundry.

W: I am trying to improve my living skills. I am going to do the laundry by myself without any help.

Q: 5 years after the release of 2PM’s ‘My House’, are you curious as to why there is a sudden regain in popularity?

W: I am really grateful for it. This is what I think. It’s not like 2PM didn’t do anything to regain the popularity. At the beginning, we were just men in our early twenties performing real difficult stage performances. We danced, sang and did acrobatics. Then as we started to lose some energy, we did some straightforward love songs. We started to go into sad love songs and started to talk about love with our eyes. Then we reached “My House”. In a natural way, we were like children finally grew up and became mature great lovers. There was a comment which I saw that said, “I am a fan now, I am sorry” I think people are finally realizing what 2PM was doing. I am really thankful for that.

Q: 13 years after your debut, how does it feel to have people who just got to know about 2PM?

W: Of course, they can do that. The trend and flow in the industry goes really fast. It takes a lot of effort to grab people’s attention from all the competition. All the sudden, we regained the spotlight with “My House”. Also, it is during our hiatus, I think this is a miracle.

Q: Instead of “My House”, if you are to sing it again, which song some into your mind?

W: I want to sing “Without U” with all my energy. Ten years ago, I am in charge if the “crying out loud” part of the song but there was a problem with my vocal cord in the performance. My condition wasn’t good so I need to do a lip sync for that part. It’s shame that I couldn’t sing it properly on the stage.

Q: 2PM has reached the top of the industry and got recognized for their skills. What’s their position in Korea?

W: Well, I can’t think of anything other than the words, ‘Korean Idols’. During the journey, not everything has been smooth sailing but I feel proud (of being a Korean idol).

Q: I heard that the group name means the hottest time of the day at 2:00 in the afternoon. When was Jang Wooyoung the hottest?

W: In 2013, we performed in Germany for the celebration of the 130th anniversary between the relation of Korea and Germany. I saw senior Lee Mi Ja and was surprised by her rehearsal performance. It was so lively and amazing. Looking at myself, I am still struggling hard to sing well. I have no choice but to tell myself, “Jang Wooyoung, have some faith and work hard.”

Q: Your personality seems to be the kind that want to learn things by facing it yourself? I heard that you went to visit Choi Baek Ho who you have never met and wanted to talk about music after watching a documentary.

W: This was when I was having my puberty in my twenties. After watching senior Choi Baek Ho’s documentary, I was comforted by him. However, my frustration didn’t go away. So I got his number and called him because I want to know how he did music for such long time. The first time I met him, he said to me, “The more I live, the better it will be. Just like the songs that were sang in my 40s were more beautiful than when I sang in my 30s. They are heading towards perfection “The moment I hear this, it was like a direct bullet shot.

Q: In a way, there can be occasions where you would give advice to someone in a similar situation. Do you have any experience with that?

W: There were some juniors who I danced with in Busan, where they were dreaming about debuting one day. Maybe I have being selfish. Since my debut, I haven’t really talk to them about it in a hopeful way. When I passed my audition with JYPE, I asked my sister if I should give it up while crying. I really don’t want them to suffer like I did. I had a hard time with my body and mind. However, I have changed my mind now. If you are really desperate for your dream and have the confident to fight within yourself, then go for it. But you will be very exhausted, so I am telling you to think carefully about it.

Q: They say that you really insisted on auditioning with JYPE. Can you still remember when you first won the open audition?

W: I think it was my 6th audition. If I fail again, I will just keep trying. Sometimes, I will go back and look at the videos back then but it is both good and sad. I looked really tired on the screen. If only I could take a step back and see the reality, I would have been a much stronger kid.

Q: What did you do very well in your life?

W: When I am dating, I never measure or calculate in the relationship. I like her so much that I don’t take notice of what’s going on around me and then I suffered a lot of pain when we broke up. I regretted it and I know it wasn’t good way to date but I couldn’t help it. However, that experience formed who I am now so I don���t regret it anymore.

Q: How important is love in your life?

W: If people are consider as number one, then love is number zero. It’s such a vague concept and I have difficulty expressing love properly. However, I do feel love through people.

Q: In 3 days, it will be your birthday. By imagination, is there a happy gift for yourself?

W: While I was in the army, our company moved buildings. The building is now bigger and the facilities are better. The practice rooms are really nice, too. It would be nice if I can have my own space where I can practice dancing all day without concerns. Really.

Q: Let’s appeal. How much do you think 2PM has contributed to the new JYPE’s building?

W: I think it is quite a bit. It’s a 9 storey building, so maybe about 4.5 storeys?

Credits and English translation @jlml718

[ingridbgalatea]

ミ✭ let's measure the distance between us in things we don’t want to talk about and wonder how long it’ll take to reach (from me, to you.)

                                         in parts i, ii, iii, and iv.

   ╰☆╮ 

ooc ; A huge thank you to all of the people who helped me write this! (and special thanks to rialismus, for beta reading and telling me that one line 'sort of doesn’t make sense, but i like the sound of it, and how it feels.’ and inspiring everything else about this drabble.)

           enjoy.

                                                                              i. 

                                         [training grounds, day-?]

When she’d first heard, she thought it was a joke.

                                           Sick.

 She grabs the student by the arms and she grips, hard, and her face is something of a scowl or simply disgust and she says,

               “don't joke like that.”

 she’s pushed off, obviously. the student’s eyes are wild - “what’s wrong with you?” - shut up! 

                                    she snarls, angry; how dare you! 

felix isn’t sick! he’s not stupid! he doesn’t just get hurt like that; he’s too careful, too cautious, too-

                           senseless, not selfless.

                                         (but if she’s being honest, he’s neither of those things.)

 felix, who combines a cat’s patience and a lion’s leap and ensnares both present and future;

felix, who is smart, and thoughtful, and clever

felix, who she knows, and loves (even if he makes it devastatingly hard, sometimes),

felix, who does not get injured so stupidly.

                                                                                    right?

                                         [infirmary, day one.]

  why is she running?

               ( though, tripping over her own feet might be more accurate, )

                                                       ‘don’t joke like that.’ is what she said, right?

 yet she’s here, staggering towards the infirmary, 

because - no way, - it’s not true. 

                       it’s not true.

she repeats it like a mantra.

     since when were these hallways so long and winding?

                                                                                     —hurry up, take me to him

                                         it’s not true.

 her thoughts wrangle with her; pull at the edge of her skirt, nip at her heels- piss off! - throw her off her balance. insistent. nagging. they are not in her face but they taste overwhelmingly bitter all the same. 

she doesn’t remember a time when running made her so nauseous.

 groan-

                                    stumble

                                                              keep running.

 she arrives- and nearly misses the door.

that might’ve been on purpose, though.

 Ingrid stops; breathes, paces

herself, clear your head before you make stupid decisions

You have no other choice (there are all and none)

open up.

                                     fine!

Ingrid throws the door open (it slams against the wall, but that seems nearly inconsequential, now), and she sees Sylvain- he looks so tired, and distant — are you okay? —, but more importantly, she sees Felix.

                                                       Oh. Felix.

                                                           “...”

Her heart hammers in her throat; it jumps from her chest to her larynx and it hammers, so — say something, please...! — hard in her lungs and knocks all of the air right out. 

 she was right to be prepared.

                                                                                                     What happened ?

                                                                                                         Who did this ?

                                                                                                             Are you….. 

     ‘who am i talking to?’ she wonders,

absently.

                                           who’s to blame?

                                                who’s to thank?

                      is she allowed to pin it on someone or something alone?

 the door clicks shut, behind her.

ingrid can tell that she’s late, apparently-

rightfully so; she does nothing but isolate herself in the training grounds or with ‘plans’.

                                    Goddess-damned her own self, huh?

{sighs with what little breath she allows into her lungs.}

 She can tell that the other students have visited, too. She sees the empty chair beside Sylvain, the tray by the end of Felix’s bed, the cake by his side. 

                                                              ��                        ‘it’s a waste,’ she thinks.

                                                                       ‘felix doesn’t like sweets, anyways.’

stepping closer;

Sylvain’s eyes travel upwards- he silently greets Ingrid.

Did your eyes always look so sad, or…?

                               she eyes the chair beside him.

                                            Ingrid doesn’t make a move to sit.

 something about knowing that if she sits 

              she’ll

shift in her chair; grip the sides and her fingers will - glide, move, tick tick tick- tap (against her knees, her thighs, her seat.), her legs will bob insistently; drumming to a rhythm that doesn’t exist. sitting down means to submit herself to the lack of movement- she can’t stand the idea. 

                she’s restless.

       she doesn’t sit.

instead, she finds herself pacing- takes her hair into her fingers and twirls (choke the blood out of your skin!); presses down the urge to bite at her nails until her hands go slack by her side. she doesn’t know what to do with herself.

 she doesn’t know what to do with this.

‘what do i…?’

              silence.

 she turns then, almost violently, expecting honey brown eyes to stare back - ‘what’s up?’ - but—

sylvain has stopped looking at her; his gaze is fixed on felix. 

                       felix.

                         sylvain.

                               felix.

                                    sylvain—

 When was the last time you were as quiet as this?

...

ingrid looks at him, 

                                                                                                      he looks at felix.

                                     sylvain?

                                         the name does not leave her lips.

              she walks, slowly, 

                      (your feet are as heavy as the weight of your heart,)                 

                                                                                           towards him.      

                                                                                   she holds his hand.

he squeezes.

she squeezes back.

 .

 they stay there, still

how many hours has it been?

        i don’t know.

do you think he’ll wake up?

                    i don’t know.

                 s h u t   u p .

 —

eventually, though, it ends. 

it ends, and ingrid curses her blind obedience.

because, eventually, the nurses usher her out; 

they tap and wake her- and their voices are soft beside felix and they manage to pry her away from his bed and out the door.

 she’s pliant, as usual;

she only follows orders.

 she doesn’t even say anything;

her legs are too tired from pacing

and staying still, where

and when they shouldn’t

she’s too exhausted to think.

 so she leaves.

 they can’t get rid of sylvain, though,

(they don’t quite try to)

and for once, ingrid envies his stubbornness.

ha,

                         if felix were awake, he would’ve laughed at her.

                                                         she would’ve laughed, too.

                                         ii.

                                         [bed(room), day two.]

 the morning comes, again. 

                                                     how?

nevermind that Ingrid does not get a wink of sleep the night before; not because she is troubled, or afraid- she just hates the way Felix looks

                                                                                                               like that (?)

  - i won’t entertain the thought of subjecting myself to this, 

                                    wake up.

She gets up (“gets up?” don’t be silly!) as soon as it is acceptable; watches orange-red light bleed into her room like a spell -- don’t make that comparison, fool; slings herself over the edge of her bed and dips her toes onto the cold floor as if getting into a pool of water- wary. she dangles her legs over the ever-present maw that is another day; she feels so small. 

                          suppress the shiver.    

 tired, trying. 

ingrid calculates the distance from her bed to the door in steps, (breathe.)

                                        strides, (breathe!) 

                                                                                           sprints- GET OUT.

 the morning is young, too young, 

‘i should be in bed,’ is the sour remark she makes.

                                            ‘-not starving.’ is the afterthought.

 her hair is messy, tousled. she pulls apart the teal band that holds what remains of her loose braid together and runs her fingers through it; tries to comb through her hair as though they were a replacement for her thoughts.

    it does nothing to clear her head.

 Ingrid spends the rest of the early morning in the training grounds,

angry, and upset.

she tears into a training dummy; stakes it through the chest!

She fixates on the destruction of guilt,

Maybe that’s what makes it feel so real.

 Her form is terrible,

she knows.

                                         [infirmary, day two.]

 Sylvain is still here

 -not that she expected otherwise.

                                                           “I like what you did with his hair,” she says.

                                                  — no response.

they sit in silence, watching felix. a softer light pours into the infirmary but they’re too tired to notice - or to care. 

    but

keeping their eyes open over him seems like obligation, so they do.

 this time, she sits. she's tired, but still; hands reach out, search and grasp and hold the end of a chair tight in her hands, pulls it out - don’t scratch the floor, please! - takes a seat. 

           she half expects felix to groan.

                                ingrid frowns (when he doesn’t).

still.

she’s still.

 this time, she doesn’t fidget. her body is quiet, when her mind is not - stop screaming. - she doesn’t tap. no … rhythm. no rhythm is present.

                                                                          it never existed in the first place-

she presses her back into her chair- it’s soft, and cushiony.  maybe she’s more tired than she thinks.

                      ‘it’d be good to fall asleep beside you, too.’

 -

 sylvain leans into her side. 

                              (he’s so tired

                                 and yet, so stiff

                                      are you okay?

                                          she wants to ask, again,

                                                  but thinks better of it.)

                                                                                                             she lets him.

 She watches sylvain, and felix; she sees the older boy manage to coax food down his throat - i’m proud of you- but she doesn’t herself. whatever hunger is suppressed by a glass of water- 

                                                              or two.

                                                                                 or three.

she feels her stomach clench around nothing more than once.

                       it matters, less.

the day passes by, hours go and ingrid does not know the meaning of ‘fast’ and ‘slow’ anymore.

Sylvain’s fingers are wrapped around Felix’s wrist; protective. It reminds Ingrid of holding a child’s hand when you guide them along.

                                                 ‘we’re not children anymore’(?)

 the dying light of day passes over felix’s face, and for the small moment it does, ingrid can only think

                            ‘the you in this light looks good,’ snrk,

                                                   I miss teasing you! 

                                     the silence pierces her as if it were her own lance.

carefully, she sits up. 

she pushes herself out of her chair, makes sure she doesn’t make a noise when she does.

stands over him.

                                                                      you’re never below me for this long.

she looks at him, and she presses two fingers on his face- calloused. her thumb holds his chin as her index presses into his cheek, gently, and she can feel small scars and scrapes on his face. she turns it over- like a nurse, checking for injuries.

                                                                            why do you look like that?

                                                                                         why are you so calm?

                                                                                                        why ...       --!  

                                      “ugh, stop fussing over me,” 

                                                                     he says. 

                                            or, no- he doesn’t. 

                                felix doesn’t say anything at all.

                                                                                        she-  

she--!

 feels like she’s about to cry, she feels tears prick at her eyes- and at the same time, a laugh forces itself out of her throat- she chokes; but it’s there. hard, not at all gentle and hurting but she chokes on this laugh and maybe- maybe? maybe she’s hysterical, or just hurt- maybe a gruesome mix.

                                                                   why do you look like that, felix?

Her heart rises into her throat like bile, and she has to stop, get out of the room and try her best not to retch.

           (Don’t retch, Ingrid-!)

                     (ugh.)

for once, she’s glad there’s little to throw up.

ingrid doesn’t go back inside.

                                           iii. 

                                         [day-- asleep? asleep.]

                                 “wake up!” she screams.

her throat is raw and it hurts; it rips at something other than her vocal cords- takes the strings of her heart and tears it wide open. 

                                                                                     ow.

  ? awake, isn’t he? if he’s staring right back at her then

how is he not awake ; 

but maybe his ‘awake’ is different from the ‘awake’ in her head  — 

          no, really;                                                 

                                               what thoughts can you have when you’re…

                                                                                                                               .

                                                                                                                              .

                                                                                                                              .

                                                                    ...

                                                               i look at you; you look at me.

                                                                                                (sure.)

 water pools at their feet- it rises, steady 

                         what kind of water is this- to be so dark? murky?  

   like mud, or acid, you should just

                                                                    dissolve. 

                                                   in.

                                                                                                                               it.

it might’ve been easier to label it as ‘fire’.

hungry,

                                     living,

                                                                    killing.

                                                                                                    (‘the both of us’?                                                                                                             or just her?)

                                       he looks so calm.

                                                        maybe that’s ok.

they lock eyes, or at least she thinks they do

                          but it feels less human; 

                                                       soulless,

                                           strange,

                                                |

                                                |

                                                |

                                            lifeless?

                       (that’s a soft way of putting ‘dead’.)

                                                                               they don’t lock eyes, not really;

                                                                                        because that’s not alive.

                                          she’s staring at something. 

                                          she thinks it stares back.

                                                                                                                   — hey,  

                                         “wake up.” is that her own voice? 

                                       it gets harder to recognise.

                            maybe mercedes had been rubbing off on her, then;

                                     slowly

                                         becoming fatalistic.

                                    ‘you’re losing another Fraldarius(?)’

                                                           .

                                         the thought is paralysing.

                                            iv. 

                                             [bed(???). day three.]

 ingrid wakes up again.

but 

this time, she wishes she’d never fallen asleep.

                                                      [ beat. ]

 Goddess,

                                         what a pathetic fucking wretch.

[callme-barnes]

Beauty & Brawn (Part 5)

                                                                                                                                 Summary- You are the top scientist in all of New York, the one that no one knows. Going through the science field as a woman is hardly easy, let alone rewarding. You’re bombarded with misogynistic men who only see you as a pretty face, not knowing that you have the mind of a thousand scientists combined. That is until you meet Tony Stark, the genius billionaire who could quite possibly be the answer to your prayers, and your heart.

Pairing: Tony Stark x Reader

It’s been a while. Catch up here!:

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

It was about 6 in the evening and you had officially been staring at the outfit lying on your bed for 40 minutes. This also included the not so healthy talking to yourself that you were having.

Why did you even think you could do this? Do you know how long its been since you’ve gone out? How long since you’ve last worn heels? You’re going to fall flat on your face and he’s going to laugh at you and your evening is going to go exactly like that.

You quickly inhaled and shut your eyes, forcing the negative thoughts to float into the back of your mind before you grabbed the dress and slipped it on over the nice black lingerie you had saved for a special occasion. Not that Tony was going to see your lingerie that evening, but it always felt nice to have something sexy on under your clothes just to give you that extra ounce of encouragement and self esteem.

The dress was long and curve hugging, cinching in at your waist and falling down loose past your hips. The slit going up your right leg was just high enough to show some skin but low enough to leave something to the imagination. It had a nice low U-shape neckline that flaunted your breasts but was also modest. You took in a deep breath and turned around to look in the mirror. It had been such a long time since you’ve seen yourself in anything even remotely fancy that it kind of made you nervous and giddy all the same time. Looking at the clock you saw you still had about an hour and a half to get ready so you walked over to your vanity and began to put on some makeup, turning on your favorite playlist and singing along to help release your nerves.

It was now 7:45 and you were ready to go. Your heels complemented your dress, and your hair fell nicely down your back in large loose waves. You heard the buzzer for your apartment buzz and you quickly took one final breath before quickly walking over and answering it.

“Hello?”

“Hello Ms. Y/L/N. I am here to escort you to dinner”&#157;

You smiled and rolled your eyes slightly at his tone and shook your head in amusement

“I’ll be right down”

You quickly walked over to your floor length mirror and checked everything again. You fluffed up your hair, did a couple of quick turn, reapplied some of your lipstick although it was already perfect, and then you grabbed your phone and your small bag and walked out into the elevator.

The ride down was full of anxiety and if anyone else was in the elevator with you you’re sure they would have felt all that energy rolling off of you like heat waves from the sun. The elevator ding sounded and you looked up seeing you were already on the ground floor. You took in one more deep breath in and then walked out when the doors opened. The first thing you saw was Tony’s figure. He was looking down at his watch and twiddling his fingers as though he was just an average man, nervous to to meet a woman for the first time. He never looked up and if anything he probably looked like he was gathering his own thoughts.

You walked over and put on a smile, tapping Tony on the shoulder and he immediately turned his head to take you in. His eyes roamed, from your head right down to the very tip of your feet. The gaze he was giving you made you nervous and you shifted under it before he cleared his throat

“Well if I’ve ever seen a more beautiful woman in my life I couldn’t remember”&#157;

You took the time to let out a nervous chuckle and looked down before looking back up at him

“Thank you. I wasn’t sure how fancy or how not fancy to dress so I’d say this is in between”

Tony shook his head and sent you a smile

“You look amazing. Even if we were going out to watch a movie or eat at a fast food restaurant I still wouldn’t even think about telling you since you might change”

His tone was one of playfulness and you smiled brightly at him

“Shall we?”&#157;

Tony quickly gathered his wits

“Sorry. Yes, yes we shall”&#157;

He stuck out his arm for you to take and you did so without a second thought. Talking to him was so effortless you couldn’t even remember why had you had been so nervous in the first place. You both walked out towards the front of your apartment complex and you saw his very nice black car. He opened the door for you, you sent him a polite thank you and he got into the driver’s side and you were off.

Dinner flew by and now you were both back at the tower going over Tony’s new idea

“I like it. I think it could help a lot of people by giving them access to clean water all the time. How much are we thinking this is going to cost for the countries that want to purchase it?”&#157;

“And that’s where you come in. See I want to do this as more of a humanitarian project. I don’t want this to cost a fortune, if those who need it can’t afford to have clean water now I wouldn’t want them to stress out about being able to purchase this mechanism. I want it to be affordable”&#157;

You pouted your lips out a bit and felt your thoughts racing before a light bulb went off

“We’d have to make it as biodegradable as possible. If you can locate the pieces we need that are either recycled or if they are pieces that are broke and going to be used for scraps, we could get them cheaper, I can fix them and then we wouldn’t have to charge an arm and a leg for it”&#157;

Tony nodded along before smiling

“And that’s why you’re working with me. I’ll start looking for suppliers tomorrow”

You smiled at Tony and fixed your dress. You were seated on top of the lab counter, your legs dangling and your mind racing with all the ideas that you has planned

“So Y/N, tell me more about you. I know the basics, I know you graduated at the top of your university on the Dean’s List. But how is it you’re so good at everything? I know I’m smart, but your brain kind of functions like a little computer and it’s the most, impressive thing I’ve seen in my life”

You looked up at Tony before smiling and wiped your hands on your thighs since they had since gotten sweaty from being alone in the same room with Tony

“Well, that’s because it practically is. When I was a kid, I used to get these horrible migraines in school and the longer I was in school the worst they got. Then in about middle school I had a moment in my chemistry class where we were dissecting an earthworm, and my vision kind of zoomed in a little and I was able to vividly see the entire system of how it worked and what was lying even beneath what the normal eyes could see. I started being able to solve Calculus problems without a piece of paper or a calculator by 7th grade. I just...I don’t know my brain kind of works where, if I’m asked something, I put everything together in my head, sometimes so fast where I don’t even register what I’m doing. I wouldn’t say I can see into the future or something, but my brain goes into overdrive and I’m able to kind of do trials in my head of every possible way something could go and I’m able to accomplish what I can because of that”&#157;

Tony was leaned back against the counter in front of you, listening to everything you were saying almost like he was trying to memorize all of it.

“What about family life? Any brothers, sisters? Mom? Dad?”

You furrowed your eyebrows and looked down

“None. Well, technically I do. But I don”t talk to them anymore”

“Why’s that?”

You took in a deep breath and looked up at him

“When I was in 7th grade, my counselor at school spoke to my parents about me. At first it was because there were complaints from my teachers, saying I must be cheating during tests or cheating during spelling bees and science competitions because I never missed anything. But my counselor was a nice older lady and I trusted her with what I was able to do. She believed in me so she told my parents I should be going to school at a math and science academy or a more top tier school. When I was younger we were poor. We were living 5 in a single room apartment, my mom, my dad, me and my two sisters. They signed me up into a great school like my counselor said. But I had to receive financial aid and scholarships because we weren’t able to afford it. Long story short instead of using the money I was receiving to keep me in school, they were keeping it to themselves and not paying my classes. We owed thousands of dollars to the school so I was kicked out and for high school I was back in public school”

Tony furrowed his eyebrows and looked down

“That’s insane. I can’t believe they’d do that”

“Neither could I. And it only continued in high school. I was getting prize money for doing inventions and projects and winning the competitions. But I never saw that money. I always figured it was the least I could do, since I lived under their roof and they were clothing me and feeding me. But one day I was unable to compete because my teacher wanted to give others a chance. My parents found out, they blew their shit, and I kind of became an outcast after that. I stopped enjoying science and just kind of did mediocre work. At 18 I left for college and I just never kept in contact”&#157;

Tony looked back up at you before exhaling, moving from his previous position to stand in front of you. You were so close you could feel his thighs brushing against your knees and you looked up at him

“Well it was a nice turn of events in a way. Now what they couldn’t appreciate I can. I...I know this might be inappropriate, and please, stop me at anytime, but you are the most gorgeous, smartest woman I’ve ever met. And I want to know more about you, and I want to help you reach any goal you want to conquer. I just, the short time you’ve been here has been so great”

You bit your lower lip

“Tony what....”

But before you were able to get your thoughts out, his lips came to yours and his hands moved to cup your cheeks to pull you closer. You were surprised and your heart was racing, but you felt your body instantly react and you kissed him back. Your hands moved to rest on his waist and he took that as an opportunity to pull himself closer to you. You could feel his heart beating against his chest and you melted deeper into the kiss. He pulled away and opened his eyes to look at you. You looked back but before he was able to say anything JARVIS spoke

“Mr. Stark, Fury is here. He’s called an emergency meeting and would like to meet in conference room 3″

You furrowed your eyebrows unable to decide if you should say something but Tony beat you to it

“He’s always had such amazing timing”&#157;

[m0onbean]

kill the prince. chapter 4

category: angst, drama, prince!jinjin AU, fantasy!AU, royalty!AU, knight!AU

pairing: jinjin X female reader

warnings: swearings, mentions of murder

words: 1.5k

note: next chapter is the final chapter!

prompt: Your mission as the head knight of the Silver Kingdom is to kill the Golden prince of your kingdom’s rival: The Golden Kingdom. But it’s not as simple as you thought it would be when you find yourself falling for the handsome prince with a golden heart.

series masterlist

You couldn’t sleep again. Not when you were thinking about your mission, thinking about Jinjin, and thinking about what you should do. Although exhaustion should’ve come and hit you like a hammer, it never did. And you hated that. You wanted to go to sleep to just stop thinking.

And just like the night before, the same pigeon arrived at your window. You’re not in the mood to even interact with your kingdom, but you feel bad for the bird. You stumble to the window, snap it open, take the letter, and slam it back closed. Now that you’re just moody and fatigued, you angrily stuff the letter under your pillow and knock out on your blanket.

It wasn’t enough sleep, but it was something at least. When you wake up, you look at the clock and realize that you’re late for your lesson. You curse at yourself and hop out of bed only to realize that you aren’t in class anymore… You just need to teach Jinjin which occurs after class. After calculating, you decide that you have a good amount of time to prepare for today’s training.

But you hadn’t forgotten the letter. You dig under your pillow and pull the scroll out. The dainty, silver bow that wrapped around the scroll deeply disturbed you. You roll it out and read it carefully:

“Head Knight (Y/N),

Your dear Knight Academy is on the brink of collapsing right now. Head Myungjun has so much debt, he won’t be able to hold the academy up much longer. He doesn’t even have enough money to feed your fellow juniors.

With that being said, we expect your mission to be completed by tomorrow. Or else, you’ll lose your chance of being Royal Knight and maybe even lose your academy that was like a home to you.”

Your crumpled the note in your fist.

Although a skeptical part of you thinks that the royal court was probably just falsely threatening you, you were NOT taking any chances. The Knight Academy is your home. The rest of the students also looked to the academy to avoid their orphanages. The academy is their home, too. And you promised Myungjun you would complete the mission for this reason.

“For the kids,” your murmur as you shred the letter and hide the remains under your pillow. You’re motivated to complete the mission, even if it means having to kill Jinjin.

You walk into the field and immediately see Jinjin practicing by himself. “Sir Jinjin, are you ready for today’s lesson?” you ask in a bored tone. You were going to get this over with.

Jinjin looks up at you with the same cute, puppy eyes. “Averil! Good morning, did you get slee-”

“Can we just start? I’m not going to waste any time today.” You sternly state while picking up the practice sword. You weren’t going to kill him here.

His smile is wiped off his face instantly. It makes your eye twitch, but you have to ignore it. You need to save the academy. But Jinjin being Jinjin… he won’t ever stop being persistent.

“Are you okay, Averil?” he cautiously asks with his eyebrows furrowed. “Did I say something yesterday that made you mad?”

A wave of guilt washes over you, but your motivation was still withstanding like a rock. “No, you didn’t. Sorry, I’m in a sour mood because I lost sleep.” You gently explain so you can quickly finish this lesson.

But Jinjin is smart, and he knows that’s probably not the reason for your anger. Yet he’s also too kind and you look tired, so he does you a favor and stops talking.

During the whole training, you give him clear directions in a monotone voice. No more joking or laughing. No more blushing and off-topic conversations. And when it’s over, Jinjin is completely washed out. You grab his hand to help him stand up, and for a moment you still feel a spark when you touch his soft hand.

“Wow Averil. You almost killed me with today’s training,” Jinjin laughs while wiping the sweat from his forehead. You give him a small nod, but you can’t help the pleased expression on your face. He was training very well and definitely improved from yesterday.

You turn to enter the castle, but Jinjin stops you by grabbing your wrist. “Wait, I know you’re in a bad mood, but can I give you the second half of the castle tour?” Ah, you remember him giving you a castle tour on your first day. He only got through two floors, though.

“Sure, Sir Jinjin,” you reply. It’s better to know more about the castle for when you escape tonight. His face lights up when you don’t reject him and you feel that sharp pain around your heart again. “Meet at the staircase!” he yells before he’s off to go change out of his sweaty armor.

Jinjin guides you to the third floor where all of the royal business stuff occurs. He shows you the many offices and rooms but apologizes when he can’t show you his father’s throne. Nobody is allowed in there unless they are summoned, Jinjin explains.

Although you’re trying to stay cold towards him, he still manages to act all funny and cheery. You give him small responses but he savors them and brightens up whenever you offer him the smallest of chuckles. You can tell that he’s not sure why you’re mad, but he’s still trying his best to cheer you up.

You two climb up another flight of stairs until you notice that Jinjin’s cheeks and ears have turned a bright red. “Sir Jinjin?” you innocently ask.

“U-Uh we’re heading to the floors with the royals’ bedrooms now,” he barely whispers.

Oh.

Carefully, Jinjin leads you to his room and he kinda hesitates before opening it. As expected, it’s very tidy. There’s a king-sized bed with golden sheets, some picture frames of what looks like his family, and a bunch of medals on the walls. You take a closer look and realize that they’re all academic awards.

“Sir Jinjin, you did well in school?”

When you turn around, you see that he’s awkwardly standing near the doorway. “Uh, yeah.” You can’t help but laugh at how nervous he was being. He looks back at you with wide eyes before he starts defending himself, “NO Wait, I’m not trying anything. I just. OKAY, don’t get the wrong- It’s just… I’ve never brought anyone in my room before.”

You look at him in genuine shock. “What?!”

“What?” He immediately shoots back. At this point, he’s gone completely red. He starts stuttering again and you can’t help but widely smile at him for being so cute.

Then you realize that you can’t feel that way. You can’t look at him that way anymore.

This whole day he’s been trying to cheer you up, probably thinking you were mad at him.

You’re not mad at him though. You’re mad at Queen Edeline. You’re mad at the royal courts. You would have never done this if they had just funded the academy. You did this FOR your home, not for the position of Royal Knight.

It’s unfair. You’ve never killed a soul before, yet they’ve sent you on a mission to kill a prince. Why you? Why is it you that has to suffer this? Why do you have to be the one that gets emotionally attached?

You can’t stop thinking about how they should’ve sent someone else. Someone that would’ve been comfortable with killing Jinjin the second they saw him. And that makes you wonder why you even got fucking close to him. Why did you do that? Why didn’t you just get over with it on the first day?

Jinjin doesn’t deserve to die, and that’s the truth. He’s a nice guy who is going to do nice things. He’s going to bring peace. He’s going to free your people.

Why him? Why does he have to be killed? He didn’t do anything.

“Averil, why are you crying?”

You slightly jump and realize that Jinjin’s hand is tenderly wiping a tear off your cheek. And before you know it, more tears are falling. “S-Sir Jinjin…” you try saying but then you break into a sob. Jinjin doesn’t miss a beat. He hugs you closer to him so your sobs are muffled in his shoulder. Your chest heaves up and down as you try to catch your breath between each cry.

He doesn’t know why you’re sad. But he’s there for you anyways.

“M-My heart,” you try telling him while your hiccups interrupt each word.

“What about your heart?” he gently cooes while stroking your hair.

“It hurts…” you finish.

Jinjin doesn’t understand what you’re talking about, but he just continues to stroke your hair and whisper “It’ll be okay” under his breath. He’s insistent on carrying you to your room, but you tell him that you’re strong enough to walk. You didn’t want him to care about you anymore.

You enter your room and shut the door. Tears are still running down your cheeks. You kneel and pull out your silver sword from under the bed.

You were going to kill Jinjin, once and for all.

[harper-clarington]

U Is Smart, U is gay, U is important || hsquared

Where: Pop’s When: Wednesday, November 28 Warnings: overconsumption of milkshakes, a gay in denial, harper being a manipulative demon Word Count: 4,494 words

Harper in italics, @northsidehunter​ in bold

Harper was tired of her twin evading the truth about what was going on with him and Sebastian. What part of no secrets was difficult for him to understand? In the back of her mind, she acknowledged that she was also keeping a secret when it came to her...encounter with Roman Lynn in his room. But that was different. She wasn't hiding anything. If he asked she'd be honest...but she'd been a darling sister and cleaned up the evidence so it's not like there was anything to worry about anyways. The real focus here was her brother and the fact that watching him and Sebastian dance around each other was exhausting. That was why she'd managed to coax him into going out to Pop's for a milkshake and some good ol' fashioned twin talk. And now they were sitting in a cozy booth in the corner of the diner, across from each other and far away from everyone else that they wouldn't be overheard, and Harper was going to wring the truth out of him if it was the last thing she did. "So.....big brother, how have you been?"

Hunter made a mental note to himself to strangle the hell out of Sebastian for drunkenly slipping the truth of their little .. thing -- he most definitely wasn't prepared to speak up, even to Harper, especially since it has only been a couple of days since their first fuck. There were still other unspoken feelings that he wanted to address -- not to Sebastian, but to himself. He should have seen it coming when Harper cornered him in the hallways, asking (begging) to accompany her to Pop's. Hunter could never say no to Harper, really, even though he had an unsettling hunch at the back of his mind that Harper wanted more than just a milkshake. She knew, he could see it, and she wanted details -- but he still found himself lying (evading, mostly) at every question she threw him.

Hunter leans back against his seat, his eyes on the glass of milkshake they were currently sharing. "Good." He answers simply, his face straight. To be honest, he had no idea why he was keeping this facade up -- Harper was his wombmate, they told each other everything, but for some unknown reason, the topic of Sebastian was something Hunter was .. Hesitant on opening up about. "You?"

Harper raised an eyebrow, but didn't comment for the time being. Getting information out of her brother was sometimes a slow and calculated game, one that she was well-versed in by now. You couldn't force things out of Hunter — he was too stubborn for that.  So Harper was going to go for slow and steady until Hunter cracked. "I am....as well as can be expected considering everything with Bri," she said, honestly. It was true. Her best friend's disappearance was weighing on her, but she'd been trying her best to drown it out with shopping and fucking and anything else she could do to get her mind off it. 

 She leaned forward and took a sip of their shared milkshake, before pulling back and putting her chin on her hand. "Can I please get a little more than 'Good'," she asked, sweetly. "We spent nine months in a womb together and you're really going to talk to me like we're complete strangers? I'm kind of hurt, Hunt, not going to lie."

His eyes dart back up to her, and he nods solemnly. Sebrina and Harper were close — just as close as he and Sebastian were; even though she refused to show it, Hunter knew that she wasn’t taking the news well. 

 He stays silent, the gears in his brain turning and whirring to formulate a response that didn’t sound too guilty or suspicious. “I have an essay due by Friday,” he starts with a smile, taking a sip after Harper. “1000 words, and I’m only half-way finished.” This definitely wasn’t the answer Harper wanted, but hell — Hunter didn’t care.

Harper nodded, reaching out to grab the cherry off the top of their milkshake. She popped it into her mouth and sucked on the fruit, waiting to see if Hunter planned on elaborating. It didn't seem likely so she swallowed and then fixed him with an unimpressed stare. 

"1000 words is really not that bad," she insisted. "You've got plenty of time. What's it about?" She murmured, deciding to let Hunter think he'd knocked her off his tail. She'd return to Sebastian when the time was right. He'd told her the truth after all, so she had their texts as a trump card if it really came down to it.

Hunter kept his eyes fixated on the glass, absentmindedly stabbing the thick concoction, “A Tale of Two Cities — we have to summarize it. I’ve finished reading it a couple of nights ago, I suppose I’d be able to finish the whole thing by tonight.” 

 The topic about Sebastian seemed to have dissipated, but Hunter kept his guard up. Harper wasn’t going to give up this easily; she was a Clarington, after all.

Harper hummed in acknowledgement. "Dickens isn't too bad. Let me know if you need a second pair of eyes. I'm happy to read it over."  She reached out to grab her brother's wrist, stilling his hand on the straw, and shot him an amused smirk. "Is there a particular reason you're attempting to murder a perfectly good milkshake?  Has the dairy done something to offend you somehow?" 

 She withdrew her hand and drew a heart on the condensation on their milkshake glass instead as she considered her brother's tense posture. This whole thing was really bothering him, it seemed. She just couldn't understand why he wouldn't talk about it so that she could help.

Hunter smiles, pleased. “I’ll hand it to you after dinner, then.” He was about to take another sip, when Harper’s hand takes his, and he looks up at his sister with an unreadable expression. He hadn’t even realized it. She was clearly trying to draw a specific answer out of him, but Hunter will not budge. “The consistency is thicker than usual,” he shrugs, “I’m not a fan of it.”

Harper nodded, perfectly happy to help Hunter out with his assignments if he needed her to. She furrowed her brow and took another sip. The milkshake tasted perfectly fine to her, just the same as their usual Pop's fare. "If it's bothering you that much, we can tell them. I'm sure they'll make as another," she replied, already raising her arm to flag down some of the waitstaff.

Hunter gently pulls her arm down with a shake of his head, “You don’t have to,” he says, “It’s just a milkshake. I wouldn’t want them to go out of their way to make us another one, I can live with this.” He stirs the milkshake a little more with his straw, before sipping again, just to prove a point.

Harper sighed, shaking her head but lowering her head. "Alright, alright, if you say so," she muttered. She leaned down and took a sip out of her straw as well. "It tastes fine to me though." 

 She tilted her head to the side, smiling softly. "You know Blaine right? Blaine Anderson. Wears bowties and always has too much gel in his hair?" Hunter’s head perks up at that, and he nods, a little confused at the quick subject change. “Yeah,” he answers, slowly, dropping his straw back into the glass. “I’ve talked to him a couple of times. What’s up with Blaine?”

Harper shrugged, smiling into their shake. "Oh, nothing. He's just really sweet, that's all. I kind of want to get to know him better," she let the sentence drag out for a second, absently stirring the milkshake between them.  "I think Sebastian likes him so I figured I'd make an effort."

Hunter almost freezes, and his eyes widen slightly as a nasty, unfamiliar feeling settled in his chest. He chews down his bottom lip, leaning down to take another sip of their milkshake — a long, dragging sip, a shitty attempt to freeze his brain. “That’s good, Blaine’s nice,” he said, hating the way the words choked out of his mouth. Harper steamrolled on, eyes fixed on Hunter's face. "Yeah...I mean Seb's been flirting with him but he flirts with everyone so it's kind of hard to tell if it's going to go anywhere," she murmured. "But I mean it'd also be a nice change of pace for him to be committed for once. I think Blaine'd be good for him," she said, waving her hand as she spoke. “Of course Sebastian flirts with everyone, it’s in his nature,” Hunter snaps, taking his straw and hastily swirling the shake, “Good for him if he decides to settle down — Blaine’s sweet, I can’t imagine anybody else perfect for Sebastian.” His tone was slightly hostile, but his words were true, somewhat, because Blaine was, indeed, a genuinely nice person. If Sebastian liked him, then good.

Harper raised an eyebrow, hiding her smile behind her hand at Hunter's tone. She knew she was pushing a lot of her brother's buttons, so ideally he'd fess up soon. But Harper was patient, she would wring what she wanted out of him. "I mean...I don't know if I'd say perfect, that's kind of a big jump. But they'd certainly be cute, don't you think?"

Taking a deep breath, Hunter sets his straw down, leaning back against his seat. He absolutely hated the thought of Sebastian and Blaine together, however cute they may be. “Harper, do I look like I give a shit? They can — go fuck, or whatever, I don’t care. Sebastian can do what he wants.”

Harper raised her hands in a placating gesture, looking down at the table. "Cool your jets, Hunter. I was just making small talk about our good friend," she said. "If there's something else you'd rather talk about, go right ahead, or you can just continue to attempt to burn a hole through the table with the sheer force of your glare."

“I’m not glaring,” he forces a smile, “I’m happy, see? I’m happy for Sebastian and Blaine.” He falls into silence for a couple of moments, trying to calm the bubbling feeling of contempt in his stomach — he and Sebastian weren’t exclusive fuckbuddies, and Sebastian had every right to sleep with whoever he wanted, but how come he was so against the idea of Sebastian dating?

Harper snorted. "You look ecstatic," she snarked. "Again, I don't think there's anything to be happy for yet, but I mean, like you said it doesn't matter either way," she mused. "We should find dates too though...it'd be fun to go on like a triple date or something...ooooh, we could go bowling! That's fun with more people." She pulled out her phone and opened up a text, with no intention of actually sending it. "I'm gonna ask Blaine if he likes bowling."

Hunter reached out in an attempt to snatch Harper’s phone, “No, what the fuck — stop that. I hate bowling.” It was a lame excuse, because Hunter was pretty good at bowling, but he’d rather not go on a triple date; six people was a crowd, and Hunter hated crowds. Yes, that was it. “You’re not dragging me into this.”

Harper giggled and raised her arms over her head and away from her brother, still tapping away. "You're coming. We can do something else. Maybe a movie? I really want to see Bohemian Rhapsody? Or something you'd rather do?" She sent the text, making sure the volume on her phone was on and Hunter could hear the sound, even if she wasn't actually sending it to any real number.

"I have far more important shit to do," Hunter says quickly, looking up at her phone helplessly. "Or, we could go together, just the two of us. Sebastian and Blaine don't have to come with us," although his tone had slightly turned sour at the mention of their names, Hunter nods approvingly at his own suggestion. "Twin bonding. How's that sound?"

Harper shook her head, scrunching her nose up and sliding her phone back into her pocket. “No, that’d be mean. Sebastian’s our friend and he needs us right now with everything going on with Bri. Besides we twin bond all the time. Hell we’re doing it now.” She waved her hand between them to emphasize her point. “I don’t understand. You’re usually more then down to hang out with Sebastian and you just said you like Blaine so what’s the problem?”

Letting out a sigh, Hunter's eyes dejectedly dart back up to meet Harper's. "It's just -- God, fine, what do you want to hear?" This conversation clearly wasn't going anywhere, and Harper's questions about Sebastian and Blaine were really fucking annoying.

Harper rolled her eyes. "I want to hear the truth. From you." She fiddled with the straw, fixing her brother with a glare. "This line of conversation is clearly bothering you. And as you probably know, Sebastian told me you two finally consummated your years of sexual tension so I don't know why you're being so cagey instead of just talking to me."

Hunter was back to swirling the milkshake, avoiding Harper’s gaze. It wasn’t bothering him, not at all. “It’s not,” he voices out his thoughts, sounding a little too petulant for his liking. Harper caught him — he can’t really lie to Harper anymore; not when she knows about his little hookup with Sebastian. “It’s weird,” he says, taking another sip of his milkshake, “It’s Sebastian. My best friend.”

Harper stilled his hand on the milkshake again, and instead pulled it down to the table so that she could lace their fingers, hoping the movement would ground him. "What's weird? That we're talking about Sebastian dating someone else or that the two of you hooked up?"

Hunter pauses, Harper’s question weighing down on him; what was weird? Hooking up with Sebastian wasn’t weird — in fact, it was almost natural, ”I — I don’t know,” he says, completely at a loss.

Harper tilted her head, rubbing her thumb over the top of Hunter's hand comfortably. "Well...what was it about this whole thing that made you so hesitant to talk to me about it in the first place?" She pursed her lips, trying not to feel offended since she knew Hunter was working through his own stuff. "We're usually so forthcoming with one another." “It’s Sebastian,” he says again, as if that was enough of an explanation for Harper. “He’s .. Different, I don’t know — we’ve known each other since we were babies, it’s..” He stops, “I don’t know.” He huffs out a frustrated sigh, “I’m sorry, I — it just felt like I had to keep .. This to myself until I’ve straightened my thoughts out.”

Harper shook her head, smiling gently at her twin. "Don't be sorry, Hunt. I just want what's best for you and if that's Sebastian, I'm happy for you," she explained. She withdrew her hand, not wanting to overwhelm him. "Can I be very blunt or is that going to scare you off?"

He manages a smile back, grateful for his little sister’s support. “It’s hard admitting it, you know? You’re the first person I’ve told — even though Sebastian doesn’t seem to have a problem announcing it to the world.” Hunter braces himself for the worst. “No, I’d rather you tell me straight-up. What is it?”

Harper snorted. "I mean has he ever been subtle about anything ever?" She wondered aloud.  She shot her brother a sympathetic smile. "I'm just going to give you my thoughts, and they might help you straighten yours out and they might not." She took a breath. "I really don't think this is just a fuck or a friends with benefits situation for you...yeah you've known Seb since we were all dorky infants, but that's not why this is all..." she waved her hand in the air abstractly. "...confusing. I just think you're finally opening the floodgates to a lot of feelings you've both been fighting for some inane reason and it's overwhelming you. Is that right at all or do I need to fuck off?"

Unbeknownst to himself, a small, fond grin makes its way across his face, and he looks down at his milkshake, looking almost shy, “He could have tried — Sebastian said he’d keep quiet about it, but I should have known better.” He was grazing his thumb across the back of Harper’s wrist, which had stopped the moment his sister’s words came crashing down on him, like a pile of bricks. “I..” The words get caught in his throat, and he huffs out a disbelieving laugh. “Feelings. The last time I’ve talked about my feelings was when I broke up with Natalie.” Harper shook her head, sympathetically patting him on the arm. "I still don't understand the decisions that went into that when both of you are still in town, but that's neither here nor there," she muttered, taking another sip of the shake, frowning as she noticed they were nearing the bottom. "I think that's your problem. You should talk about them more. It'll get that constipated look off your face," she joked. "So," she waved her hand in the air again. "How do you feel when you're with Bas?"

"That's a talk for another time, I suppose." Hunter squints. He'd rather not think about Natalie as of the moment -- they, too, had fallen in a similar arrangement, despite having ended their relationship on ..  Emotional terms. "Constipated. Really." Hunter scrunches his nose, a little offended, but Harper wasn't the only person who had told him that. "With Sebastian? Happy." That was one way to put it -- he could elaborate; he might, if Harper asked, but he was one hundred percent sure that he wouldn't be able to shut up if he did so. "Do you want to order another milkshake, Harp? The chocolate-flavoured one?"

Harper nodded, it wasn't the time to talk about that relationship now. Though it might be if Natalie and Sebastian didn't stop trying to maim each other over social media, another talk about her brother getting his beaus under control might be necessary. "Yes. You look like something very unpleasant is lodged up your ass," she snorted, before finishing off the milkshake. "Chocolate would be nice," she replied, before turning back to the topic at hand. His feelings. "What kind of happy? Same kind of happy you feel with me?" She prodded.

After calling a waitress over to order a glass of chocolate milkshake, Hunter found himself instinctively shaking his head at Harper's question with a laugh, "No, it's .. Different.. He's different. It's hard to explain." He reaches out for Harper's hand again, taking it and squeezing it. "Don't get the wrong idea, I love you; you're still my number one. Sebastian -- is Sebastian." He waves his other hand vaguely, trying to get his point across.

Harper shot him a broad smile, happy at the reassurance even though she hadn't been worried about that for even a second. "Duh, I better be," she joked, squeezing his hand back. "But try — to explain, I mean. Sebastian being Sebastian to you means something different than it does to me," she explained. "To me, he's a friend, an ex-dance partner, a karaoke duet king and the best person to gossip with. What's he to you?" What was Sebastian to him? A good fuck -- no, he was more than that. They had set some ground rules, though, they had promised each other to keep things between them strictly platonic, feelings-wise. "He's my best friend. A person I can blindly trust." Hunter grins, "He's egotistical, quite a handful when intoxicated, and is ridiculously high-maintenance, but.." His features soften, "I like .. Maintaining him, if that makes any sense."

Harper wondered in Hunter realized the literal hearteyes he was making at the moment but she thought it best not to mention it. Instead she tried for another angle. "Is...do you want to be the only person maintaining him? I mean you didn't seem very happy about the idea of Blaine doing the same when I mentioned it to you earlier," she explained, just as the waitress placed a new milkshake in front of them.

His jaw tightens at the mention of Blaine, “Maybe .. Maybe I was just being selfish,” Hunter answered slowly, though it sounded more like he was trying to convince himself, rather than Harper. He takes a small sip of the chocolate milkshake. “Blaine — Blaine’s great. He’s a great guy. Nice, patient, intelligent, fun to talk to. They’d be good together.” Harper didn’t miss her brother tensing up all over again, so she tread carefully. “I don’t think it’s selfish to want to have someone to yourself if they’re ok with it too,” she said, running her finger along the top of her straw. “Blaine is great. You’re naming all sorts of characteristics that are lovely but I don’t know if you...are being totally truthful here.”

"I'm being truthful about Blaine," he retorts -- it was true, Hunter genuinely liked Blaine. It was the thought of Sebastian and Blaine dating that put him off. He looks up at Harper, face hesitant. "Does -- does Sebastian actually like Blaine?" He asked tentatively, "He .. Never brought it up. Not that he has an obligation to."

Harper reached over to squeeze Hunter's hand again, intertwining their fingers. "I don't actually think he wants to date him or anything...just that he's cute," she said softly. "Seb's not exactly the commitment type, is he?" For some reason, Harper's consoling words didn't help. "Yeah -- yeah," he huffs out a humourless laugh, "He's not. Neither am I." A lie. He'd dated Natalie for 2 years. "Which, you know, is a good thing, because it makes things less .. Complicated."

Harper rolled her eyes. Hunter had such a tendency to not really see himself for who he really was at all. "You dated Nat for like two years," she pointed out, leaning in to take a sip of their shake. "It's not really complicated. Either you're two bros helping each other out or it's more than that and you should re-evaluate whether this whole thing is going to end up hurting someone or not."

Hunter chews down on his bottom lip, "I -- whatever." Natalie was the longest relationship he's ever had, and admittedly, there were times where he missed her, fleeting moments where he wanted her back, but Hunter wasn't one to impulsively act out on his emotions. "Sebastian and I have already talked about it. We .. Won't let it jeopardize our friendship. You could say that we're just 'bros helping each other out'," he says with a shrug, "That's that. I guess."

Harper reached out to poke her brother in the cheek, shaking her head at his naivety. "Listen, I don't mean to be the person that poked holes in well-laid plans but you guys can 'talk' all you want, but if someone is or does catch feelings that all spirals. And if feelings are involved, it's better to be honest about them sooner rather than later. That's how you preserve the friendship."

Resisting the urge to swat Harper's hand away in a fit of petty annoyance, Hunter leans back against his seat, his face twisted in a small frown. "That won't be a problem," Hunter said, faltering a bit and he immediately hated the uncertainty that laced his voice. "Because feelings aren't involved. He's -- he's my best friend. Sure, we've crossed a boundary, and there's no going back, but.. There's .. Nothing to worry about."

Harper sighed. There was only so much prodding a sister could do without outright spelling things out for her brother and she was worried if she did, he'd have a fit, so she erred on the side of caution. "If you say so, brother dearest. I'd just be careful if I were you." She took another sip of the shake. "Anyways, if this is all fine and dandy, I still don't understand why you tried so hard not to tell me. I'm your sister not your  warden. W're supposed to talk to each other about stuff." "Because it's weird," Hunter protested, "It's Sebastian," he says again, as it that explanation in itself would help Harper comprehend the complexity of the situation. He leans close, taking a long sip of the chocolate shake, "I know. I'll -- be more open about .. Him. This whole situation in general, even though there's nothing much to talk about. He's just my best friend. Whom I find attractive."

Harper shrugged, not particularly convinced. “I mean he is attractive. But anyways, if you do feel like the situation is spiralling, I am here for you, you know? Through anything. Even the weirdness.” She reaches out to squeeze Hunter’s hand again. “But really there’s no need to worry about him dating anyone else, if you ask me.”

He shoots her a small, grateful smile, squeezing her hand back. “Thank you,” he says sincerely. “It’s — I don’t know why it’s frustrating me so much, trying to .. Wrap my head around this.” His brows furrow, “Also, I’m not worried about him dating anyone.” "It's not something you need to figure out right now or even today. But it's something you should probably try to work out eventually, either with my help or on your own. It'll give you some sort of peace of mind and it'll help you navigate your arrangement with him better," she suggested, releasing his hand after one last squeeze. "Okay, Hunter," she replied, not convinced in the slightest but not wanting to cause a fight.

His frown only deepens a little at her dubious tone, but he doesn’t say anything else. He takes one last sip of the shake, before drawing back. “We should get going, unless you’d want to stay for a third glass?” He teases with a grin, “Though, you’re going to need to wear yourself to a shadow dancing the calories off.”

Harper scrunched up her face, offended. "I dance away enough calories for a day of indulgence, thank you," she muttered. "But yes, let's go. The rabble are starting to trickle in." She nodded her head to one of the other tables — it had been empty before they got there but was now brimming with South Siders.

“Of course, just don’t get carried away.” After waving the waitress over and paying for the milkshakes, Hunter slides out of the booth, wrapping a protective arm around Harper as he glanced at the rowdy group in distaste, “Dregs,” he said simply with a shake of his head, stepping out of the diner and walking back to his car.