narimlove

[acotars]

The intensity with which marketing and booktok use tropes is honestly... alarming? Books are being stripped down to a y/n fanfic and being commodified in a way unlike anything before. And yes, I do largely blame booktok

send me your hot takes/unpopular lit opinions and i’ll tell you whether i’d let you in or not

[m3kuroshirt]

House of Assassins

GrimmIchi Weekend Challenge #4

Words Count: 1738

Challenged by @backwardshirt

Warnings: None

Genre/trope: Found Family

Required words: neighbour, killer

Ichigo lives with his found family of assassins, and they're getting some new neighbours.

This will be part of a series :D

“Ichigo!” The voice came to him through the murky shadows of sleep. Ichigo shifted, heavy eyelids fluttering. “Ichigo! WAKE UP!” The scream jolted him fully awake and Ichigo barely had time to dodge whatever was flying toward him. He threw himself to the side and thudded to the floor. A shadow flew over him and his bed and hit the wall with a thunk! A groan came from the other side of the bed. Ichigo rubbed the side he landed on and raised himself up, peering over the bed. There he saw…a Renji, splayed out on the floor, red hair broken loose from its usual ponytail.

“What the hell, Renji? You could have knocked,” Ichigo grumbled. His friend grunted and heaved himself up from the floor, turning to face him.

“I did.” He rubbed his head with a frown. “And then Rukia said the food she made is getting cold. So I decided to use desperate measures.”

Ichigo gave him a deadpan stare. “Knocking didn’t work, so naturally your next step was launching yourself at me?” Renji blinked up at him.

“…yes?”

Ichigo glared at him. Renji shrugged. Ichigo sighed and pushed off from the bed. He turned around and walked to his closet to grab something to wear. As he pulled on his shirt, he glanced over his shoulder. “You gonna give me privacy or…?”

Renji, who had moved himself up to the bed and was laying on it and reading a manga he grabbed off the night table, gave him a cursory glance before returning to his book. “Nope. Your bed is comfy.”

“We have the same kind of mattress. Literally. Bought the same day. What the hell have you done to yours to make it less comfy?!” Ichigo struggled into his tight jeans as he spoke. Renji shrugged.

“Why do you wear such tight pants?” The tone of his voice suggested the question was meant rhetorically and Ichigo glared at him again. Renji smirked.

“Renji! Ichigo! The food is going cold! If you two don’t get down here right now, you’ll miss out!” The words were innocent enough, but the voice that delivered them was laced with barely contained annoyance. The two straightened and exchanged wide eyed glances before rushing to the door and down the stairs.

They were greeted by a stern-faced Rukia, a smiling Orihime munching on pancakes, and a silent Chad putting dishes in the dishwasher. Exchanging greetings with everyone, the two sat down with plates stacked with pancakes and dug in.

“Our new neighbours move in today,” Orihime stated cheerily as she finished the last of her food. She stretched her arms over her head. “So, we have to be on our best behaviour, you know. Kisuke said so.” Ichigo gave a non-committal grunt as he chewed on his food. As if Kisuke knows anything about ‘best behaviour’, he thought.

As if on cue, the door to the basement burst open and Kisuke Urahara struggled up the stairs, carrying a massive box. What was in the box? Ichigo wasn’t sure he wanted to know. He tried to eat faster, but he knew leaving any unfinished food wasn’t an option the way Rukia was watching. With a huff, Kisuke heaved the box and dropped it on the only clear section of the table. “How are my little killer children?” he asked with a grin. Orihime smiled widely.

“Good morning, Kisuke!” she chimed. Chad nodded a greeting before disappearing back upstairs. Ichigo stared at the blond man.

“I thought we were being subtle today?” he questioned. Kisuke waved him off with a smug grin.

“Eh?” Kisuke pretended to peer around with overexaggerated motions. “Why? Are there any new neighbours in here?” Ichigo shot him an annoyed glance but Renji snorted and almost choked on his food, catching the other boy’s attention.

“Renji. If you die laughing at Kisuke making fun of me, I will not be doing CPR to bring you back,” he stated. Renji coughed again, before managing to speak.

“F…Fair,” he gasped out before downing a glass of water. Ichigo turned back to Kisuke.

“Got any jobs today?”

Kisuke shook his head. “Nope. New supplies to test out, though,” he answered brightly as he patted the heavy box. Ichigo stared at the box for a moment, then shared a glance with Rukia, Orihime, and Renji.

“I have cooking lessons with Rukia later!” Orihime declared immediately.

“Going to meet up with Byakuya! We’ll be busy all day,” Renji added.

“I’m practicing hand to hand with Yoruichi today!” Ichigo threw his excuse out hastily. He sent a silent apology to Chad and Uryuu, and from the looks of everyone else’s faces, they were doing the same. Then, as if on a cue, all of them rapidly cleaned up and vacated the kitchen.

When he was finally out of the house, and free of Kisuke, only then did Ichigo allow himself to relax. A gentle autumn breeze tugged his hair and sent a shiver down his spine, so Ichigo turned up the collar of his jacket and shoved his hands in his pocket. He could see the moving truck pulled up to the house next to theirs, and although he was curious, he tried to keep his distance. Unfortunately, Kisuke was too good of friends with Yoruichi for Ichigo to be able to actually lie about practicing with her, so he had accidentally talked himself into a corner and had no choice but to walk past the truck on his way to her place.

That is, until it happened.

As he walked past the truck, a shadow fell over him and a high-pitched voice shouted, “Look out!” Ichigo spun around rapidly and caught the falling object. Which happened to be a man. A man holding a heavy box. Ichigo landed on his ass with an ‘oof!’, a large warm body in his lap, back pressed up against his chest and ear near his mouth.

“Fuck,” was the first thing Ichigo heard, and the voice was low and rough and delicious…No. Bad Ichigo, he thought to himself. At least make sure he’s not hurt, you idiot.

“You ok?” he asked. The man stiffened. Then he scrambled off of Ichigo and turned around, box shoved onto the ground. Ichigo stared up at him, and his breath caught in his throat. The man was tall, with broad shoulders, messy blue hair and piercing blue eyes. A white t-shirt stretched a little too tightly across his chest, and sweat beaded on his forehead, likely from the effort of moving boxes. Ichigo realized he was staring, and the man was staring back at him.

“Grimmy! Are you ok?!” a woman with green hair poked her head out of the truck the man had fallen from. The man glanced at her, and Ichigo realized that must be who she was referring to. The woman’s eyes fell on Ichigo and widened, before she turned back to the blue-haired man. “You shouldn’t get so distracted! Other people will get hurt!” The man’s cheeks reddened.

“’m fine,” he muttered. Then he looked at Ichigo and offered him a hand. “Y’alright?” he asked, clearly embarrassed. Ichigo blinked and took the hand, fighting back a blush.

“Uh, yeah. I’m…I’m good,” he replied. As the man helped him to stand, Ichigo had to virtually beat away the thoughts in his mind. Don’t focus on the biceps…don’t focus on the biceps…he chanted internally. Once he was upright, he swayed a little, the blood rushing anywhere but to his brain. “Sh-shit,” he mumbled as he stumbled a little. Immediately, a strong arm was wrapped around him.

“You sure about that?” a low voice asked. Ichigo closed his eyes. Get it together, Kurosaki, he chastised himself, you’re an assassin. You can’t be going weak in the knees for one hot guy. You see Renji every day. An image of Renji snoring, on his bed, hair tangled and drool pooling on the pillow next to him, rose in his mind and Ichigo found himself able to gain his composure. Ok, maybe Renji isn’t that hot…

“U-uh, yeah,” Ichigo mumbled. He opened his eyes and stepped away from the stranger. He turned around with a reassuring smile to the man and the woman. “Sorry about that.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Not the way you were planning on meeting your new neighbour, I’m sure. Uh, I’m Ichigo. Live next door,” Ichigo introduced himself. The green-haired girl smiled.

“I’m Nelliel! You can call me Nel! It’s nice to meet you, Ichigo! I’m glad Grimmy didn’t crush you into dust!” she answered with an enthusiastic wave.

‘Grimmy’ shot Nel a glare. He turned back to Ichigo. “’M Grimmjow. Not whatever weird nickname she” Grimmjow jerked a thumb toward Nel, “decides to give me for the day.” Grimmjow? More like Grimm-WOW. Ichigo internally cringed at his own lame pun and thanked the universe he didn’t say that out loud. He opened his mouth to make an excuse to leave when a voice behind him called out.

“IIICHIGOOOO~,” Kisuke’s voice rang out from the front door of his home. Ichigo tensed. “I see you’re not at Yoruichi’s and she said –”

Eyes wide, Ichigo spun around, desperate not to be roped into another experiment with deadly weapons and poisonous concoctions. “I’m helping the neighbours move in, Kisuke!” he hollered. He heard a quiet ‘huh?’ behind him and shot a pleading look over his shoulder at Grimmjow and Nel. Grimmjow frowned, confused, but Nel seemed to catch on. She smiled brightly and waved to Kisuke.

“Your son is really kind to offer his help!” she called. Ichigo dared a glance at Kisuke to see if the lie worked and caught sight of Kisuke’s knowing look. Unfortunately, the windows of the house gave a clear view of their neighbour’s front yard…so it looked like Ichigo would be under surveillance. Damn. I won’t be able to get away. He turned and held his arms out for a box, but it wasn’t Nel who handed him one. Instead, Grimmjow grabbed the large, heavy box he dropped earlier and rested half of it in Ichigo’s arms.

“It’s too heavy to carry alone,” was the only justification Ichigo got. He blinked, cheeks turning pink as he realized this would mean he’d have to work with Grimmjow…carrying things…watching the other man carry things…and see more of those lovely biceps…yeah, ok, maybe Ichigo was more on board with this than he thought.

[recentanimenews]

FEATURE: The 6 Best Books On The History Of Manga And Anime

  Say you’re a fan of anime and manga who’s looking to learn more about history or craft. Where do you begin? There’s whatever insight you can glean from the work itself, of course. There’s also a good amount of information available online, from animation blogs to translated manga interviews to personal pieces. But when all else fails, turn to the library. Here are some excellent nonfiction books on the manga and anime industry that I’d recommend to just about anybody. I’ve also read at least sections of every book on this list, so you have my guarantee of their quality!

  Image via Penguin Random House

  Pure Invention: How Japan's Pop Culture Conquered the World reaches beyond manga and anime to encompass Japanese pop culture post World War II. But there are plenty of stories in here that fans of anime and manga might find fascinating: 

  The toy car that inspired top developers at Nintendo

How the karaoke machine led directly to idol culture, as music producers sought to produce music that ordinary people could sing

The manga-obsessed student radicals of the 1960s, many of whom came to work on later anime projects like Mobile Suit Gundam

  Author Matt Alt’s choice of interviewees and attention to detail marks Pure Invention as one of the best of its kind. If you’re a curious reader looking for an accessible (and recent!) popular history, I highly recommend this book.

  Image via Bloomsbury.com

  For fans abroad, the history of anime begins with the airing of Osamu Tezuka’s Astro Boy on Japanese television. But this wasn’t enough for Jonathan Clements, a long-time anime and manga scholar who continues to blog on Schoolgirl Milky Crisis. His academic text Anime: A History begins in the 1910s, 50 years before the airing of Astro Boy, in fact, Astro Boy only appears halfway through the book! Clements is concerned not just with the medium of anime itself, but the cultural traditions, historical events, and individual people that brought it into existence.

  One of the greatest obstacles standing in the way of English-speakers seeking to understand the history of Japanese animation — besides, as Clements notes, the haphazard nature of even those resources available in Japanese — is the language barrier. Online writers at sites such as Sakugablog have done fantastic work in making some of this information accessible, but those same writers would be the first to acknowledge there’s still plenty we don’t know. Anime: A History synthesizes countless Japanese-language source texts and interviews about the history of animation, yet Clements is careful to acknowledge that the testimony of individual actors within the industry must be weighed against both their own agenda and the words of others. While Anime: A History would be a valuable text if it was nothing more than a synthesis, Clements’ ambition to build a coherent history of Japanese animation from a production standpoint that thoroughly examines its subject matter and context from all angles is what makes it essential.

  Image via Stone Bridge Press

  Jonathan Clements collaborated with equally prestigious anime and manga scholar Helen McCarthy to produce The Anime Encyclopedia, whose third edition was published in 2015. It’s an enormous text (over a thousand pages long!) that covers everything from summaries and critical appraisals of popular titles to specific themes and tropes to nuggets of cultural history and influence. If I were to criticize this project, I would say that recent anime writing outside the United States exposes The Anime Encyclopedia’s biases; for instance, the magical girl series Ojamajo Doremi only merits a few paragraphs despite its status as a beloved children's series in Japan. Keeping that in mind, it’s an impressive resource that is great fun to browse (and to disagree with)!

  Image via j-novel club

  Mari Okada is one of the most prolific and influential anime writers of the past decade. She’s worked on adaptations, original projects like Anohana: The Flower We Saw That Day and KIZNAIVER, and even directed her own films. In her memoir, From Truant to Anime Screenwriter, Okada frankly discusses her personal struggles: her fraught relationship with her mother, her years as a young student when she couldn’t bring herself to attend class, and the process by which she gathered her courage to touch upon her personal experiences in her work. There are chapters of this book that wouldn’t be out of place in an Okada-written drama, which I suppose is the point.

  Okada’s memoir is in part a testament to her work ethic and her willingness to tackle any challenge no matter how difficult or annoying it is. But it’s also a rosetta stone for her work: not just in how it overlaps with her personal life, but in its emphasis on the importance of communication despite how difficult it can be to voice even simple feelings. Whether you’re a fan of Okada or not, I found this to be a great resource for writers nervous of the fraught boundary between fiction and personal experience or for readers who want to know what makes Okada’s work so distinct.

  Image via Stone Bridge Press

  Frederik Schodt is one of manga criticism’s greatest elder statesmen. His book Manga! Manga! put him on the map, not only for its editorial content but also for its translated excerpts of Japanese comics — including what would be, for years, the only available English chapter of Rose of Versailles! Yet that book was published in 1983 and sections can’t help but read as dated now. So I’m recommending the sequel here, 1996’s Dreamland Japan. 

  Like its predecessor, much of Dreamland Japan is devoted to detailing Schodt’s theories as to what manga is and how it works. But the sections of the book I personally find most valuable are the profiles where Schodt writes at length about specific manga artists he either personally enjoys or believes to embody a specific genre unique to manga. The freakish kitsch of Suehiro Maruo; Ryoko Yamagishi’s historical epic Hi Izuru Tokoro no Tenshi (Emperor of the Land of the Rising Sun); and alternative artists like Kazuichi Hanawa and Shungicu Uchida. These chapters stand as a stark reminder that despite the recent popularity of manga in the United States, many fantastic comics remain completely unknown to most English-speaking audiences.

  Image via ComiPress

  Finally, there’s Udagawa Takeo’s Manga Zombie! Translated into English by John Gallagher, it’s an eccentric and rewarding text that profiles several avant-garde manga artists from the ‘60s and ‘70s. Udagawa strongly dislikes the market-driven manga hits that would go on to rule the world from the pages of Shonen Jump and fights instead for the careers of authors whose work was published in the pages of pornographic magazines as often as they were in Jump or the alternative magazine Garo. Most of these authors have never been published in English, whether officially or through illicit means like scanlations. If not for the translation of Manga Zombie — or for Udagawa’s further works of manga scholarship — the artists he writes about might vanish into history without leaving a trace.

  The comics detailed in Manga Zombie can be grotesque, ranging from the “fleshbomb style” of artists like Masaru Sakaki to prescient weirdos like George Takiyama. Some might be repelled by the content here; personally, I’m disappointed by the lack of female comics artists featured, although Udagawa (who mentions the girls comic pioneers the 49ers in the foreword to his book) is certainly aware of them. But I love reading folks talking about their favorite work that I’ve never heard about, and Udagawa makes for an idiosyncratic tour guide to some truly unique material. For those willing to brave the world of Japanese exploitation comics, Manga Zombie is a hidden gem.

  What’s your favorite text about manga or anime? Is there an interview you consider especially interesting? Let us know in the comments!

      Adam W is a Features Writer at Crunchyroll. When he isn't reading weird fantasy novels and horror fiction, he sporadically contributes with a loose coalition of friends to a blog called Isn't it Electrifying? You can find him on Twitter at: @wendeego

  Do you love writing? Do you love anime? If you have an idea for a feature, pitch it to Crunchyroll Features!

By: Adam Wescott

[onebadwinter]

The Joker Tropes

Taken from Here

0% Approval Rating: Apart from Harley (and even then, only when their on-off relationship is "on"), Gaggy and Punchline, no one likes or supports the Joker. In any way, whatsoever. Damn near every other member of Batman's Rogues Gallery hates his guts, mostly because not only is he completely sociopathic and unpredictable, but also they are all scared shitless by him. The only reason why he's even allowed in teams such as the Legion of Doom is because of that fear: if they exclude him from the lineup, then chances are that dead bodies will be lining the streets in their name. Trickster spells it out in "Underworld Unleashed." Trickster: Great going, Neron, bring in the one guy no one wants to be in the same room with. When super-villains want to scare each other, they tell Joker stories.

Abusive Parents: One common tactic for the Joker to garner sympathy is claiming he was ill-treated by his parents. Given his propensity to spew out different and sometimes contradictory backstories, nobody knows if they're true.Harley Quinn: Joker told me things, secret things he never told anyone... Batman: What did he tell you, Harley? Was it the line about the abusive father, or the one about the alcoholic mom? Of course, the runaway orphan story is particularly moving, too. He's gained a lot of sympathy with that one. What was it he told that one parole officer? Oh, yes... 'There was only one time I ever saw dad really happy. He took me to the ice show when I was seven...' Harley: (crying) Circus... He told me it was the circus. Batman: He's got a million of them, Harley.

Acquired Poison Immunity: In many continuities, he's immune to his trademark Joker Venom/Smilex. In a crossover comic with Captain America, he also proves to be immune to Red Skull's "Dust of Death", as their trademark poisons are too similar to each other.

Ambiguous Disorder: He's undeniably insane and Ax-Crazy, but has no official diagnosis. If anything, he can just be diagnosed with "Being the Joker". However, it’s possible he’s perfectly sane and just The Sociopath, and is using his manipulation abilities to continue his reign of terror.

Ambiguous Start of Darkness: Related to his Multiple-Choice Past; the only thing consistent is that he was a low-level crook who got dunked in chemicals to become the Joker. C While some origins (most notably The Killing Joke) have him being forced into crime, others have him as already a sinister criminal beforehand. Batman (1989) and Batman: The Animated Series choose the Evil All Along interpretation.

Appropriated Appellation:

Arch-Enemy: A classic example to the Batman, and not just in the comics - they are pretty much the iconic gold standard when it comes to this trope. The two of them are the page image for a reason.

Attention Whore: A big part of his motivation in various continuities. He even admits as such at one point, while denying he's not behind one particular crime.Joker: Do you really think I would stir up so much trouble and not make sure you knew it was me?

Ax-Crazy: One of his main characteristics is his willingness to psycho on anyone, including his own henchmen.

Bad Boss: Willing to casually kill his own henchmen for any reason, be it part of a plan, for amusement, or simply on a whim.

Bad People Abuse Animals: Defied by The Joker in at least one story (Emperor Joker). Evil Jimmy Olson kills Superman, who has been turned into a dog, by crushing him underneath a fire hydrant. The Joker is simply annoyed, because he doesn't know how to make something as pointless as beating a dumb animal funny. Jimmy Olson is then beaten to death by two giant robots who appear out of nowhere.

Believing Their Own Lies: He sometimes believes his Multiple-Choice Past, Depending on the Writer of course. One issue of the Robin Series had the Joker actually in tears as he told the psychiatrist of his abusive childhood, only for the psychiatrist to coldly point out that it's the seventh story he's told now.

Berserk Button:

Black Comedy: This is one of Joker’s specialties. To normal people, killing would be a terrible thing, but to Joker, it’s hilarious, especially if he does it in a way that amuses him.

Bond Villain Stupidity: In a "Detective Comics" story written by Paul Dini, the Joker (while impersonating a stage magician he had previously murdered) shot Zatanna in the throat so she couldn't recite a spell to save herself, then locked her in a tank of water while strapping Batman in an electric chair. He didn't shoot her in the head because he wanted Batman to watch helplessly as she died. This didn't go so well because first, he's BATMAN! and second, Zatanna was able to write a healing incantation on the lid of the tank using her own blood, which made the spell even more powerful.

Boring Insult: While the Joker has used it a few times on others, he mostly does it to hear the sound of his own voice as the people he usually slings this insult at don't really care whether or not they're boring. On the other hand, this is Joker's Berserk Button when others use it against him. Most notably, he reacts poorly when Terry deliberately exploits this flaw with glee and even rubs it in his face in Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker. After all, the natural enemy of a comedian is The Heckler.

Breakout Villain: The Trope Codifier for comics. DC's initial intention was to kill him off in his second appearance. Fortunately, editor Whitney Ellsworth convinced DC to spare him, a panel was hastily added to show that he'd survived, and the Joker rapidly became not only Batman's Arch-Enemy, but arguably the most iconic example of an Arch-Enemy in all of fiction.

Break the Comedian: A sure way to determined if things have gotten real, even for the Joker, is if he isn't laughing or joking. A famous example involved the Joker being frightened during the events of Alan Moore's Swamp Thing run, when he was horrified by Arcane's actions.

Clear My Name: The Brave and the Bold has him framed for several murders and he must use Batman's help.

Collective Identity: As revealed in Darkseid War and DC Rebirth, the Joker has been used by three people, though Batman: Three Jokers clarified it as this: The Criminal (the original "Golden Age" Joker from the character's debut in Batman #1), The Clown (the "Silver Age" Joker, strongly implied to be the one who killed Jason Todd), and The Comedian (the current "Modern Age" Joker, who kidnapped and tormented Jim Gordon).

Combat Pragmatist : While his fighting prowess varies from remarkably proficient to extremely weak Depending on the Writer, the Joker is a consistently dirty fighter, striking enemies when and where they are most vulnerable. Besides his myriad of gag gadgets, he often carries concealed weapons, gases and acids on his person, and won't hesitate to brandish a wrench or smash a chair over your head in a pinch. He is usually adept with knives and, unlike Batman, rarely has any reservations about firearms. He has no qualms kicking an opponent when they're down, and will employ deception, feigning surrender or defeat to get Batman to lower his guard.

Comic-Book Fantasy Casting:

Confusion Fu: This is often his last line of defense when Batman corners him, especially in the animated television shows. Effectiveness varies.

Cop Killer: Sometimes police officers are among the Joker's victims:

Create Your Own Villain: Most stories posit he was chased by Batman through a factory with No OSHA Compliance, which caused him to be exposed to acid, discoloring his skin and hair and driving him insane when he sees his reflection. Often he claims Batman is responsible for turning him into The Joker.

Creepy High-Pitched Voice: In voiced roles, he usually has a high-pitched voice to contrast Batman's Badass Baritone.

Crossover Villain-in-Chief: In DC's Crisis Crossover events that involve a lot of villains, like Salvation Run and Forever Evil, The Joker usually fills this role along with Lex Luthor.

Crouching Moron, Hidden Badass: Insanity aside, sometimes the Joker's plans and methods are so out there they just seem stupid. Despite appearances, he's usually very cunning, and always very dangerous. In fact, part and parcel of what makes the Joker's plans devastating is that he knows how to hide the punchline for lack of a better word. The plans are so innocuous, so disheveled and so utterly random that they usually have no sane MO, which makes it hard to see the bigger picture of the plan unless Batman pieces it together quickly.

Critical Psychoanalysis Failure: Happens frequently, though this may be an indication of the competence of the staff at Arkham. One such time was with Dr. Harleen Quinzel, who bought his story hook, line and sinker and declared him sane, then broke him out of Arkham and started dating him (of course, her exact analysis was that he was utilizing Obfuscating Insanity and it's implied that she was actually right, so perhaps she was the only good doctor at Arkham after all...)

Deadly Prank: He generally considers murdering someone for a joke to be morally no different than putting a whoopie cushion on their chair.

Depending on the Artist: His depiction varies a lot between eras and between different artists in the same period. Major differences are whether he can form facial expressions other than a grin, and whether he is average-sized or freakishly tall and thin.

Depending on the Writer: There are many huge variations, the most common and glaring being:

Depraved Homosexual: Not above invoking this deliberately to get under Batman's skin. Whether he means all his flirting and feel-copping varies slightly Depending on the Writer and heavily depending on one's own interpretation.

Diplomatic Impunity: In A Death in the Family, Ayatollah Khomeini appoints him the UN ambassador to Iran, giving him diplomatic immunity. This was later retconned to the fictional Syraq due to reasons of taste.

Dirty Coward: There is a common misconception that Joker has no regard for his own life and doesn't care if he dies or not. In actuality he does care, and the reason he keeps taunting morally good characters into killing him is because he's confident that they don't have the guts to off him. When he comes across someone who is willing to kill him, he shows his true colors as a sniveling little coward where he starts pleading for his life.The Punisher: I got all the therapy you need right here, comedian.The Joker: You're really going to do it.

Disproportionate Retribution: Has been known to try to kill people for minor slights, such as welshing on a bet on a sporting event for trivial stakes.

Domestic Abuse: This characterizes his relationship with his "henchwench" Harley Quinn to a T. Joker frequently yells at her, puts her down, humiliates her, and exposes her to all manner of violence ranging from "merely" slapping or punching her to outright trying to murder her. Such is her Mad Love that she ignored his abuse for most of her existence in comic history, with the two only separating in the late 2010s.

The Dreaded: Easily one of the most feared villains in the entire DC universe. Other villains are afraid of him; it's been said that when criminals want to scare each other, they tell Joker stories.

Driven to Madness: Doing this to others has become part of his MO. What triggered his own insanity and belief in nihilism remains unknown.

Early Installment Weirdness: Just take a gander at his earliest appearances:

Electric Joybuzzer: One of his signature weapons, a lethal variation, most memorably used in Batman (1989). He ended up Hoist by His Own Petard when trying to use it on Static.Static: That was fun. Let me try! (BZZZZT!) (Batman approves.)

Enemy Mine:

Even Evil Has Standards: Oddly enough, this trope does occasionally apply to him.

Even Evil Has Loved Ones: Completely averted with Harley. He physically and emotionally abuses her and tried to kill her on numerous occasions. They eventually break up in the New 52 continuity.

Evil All Along: Some versions, such as the DC Animated Universe and Batman (1989), go with the interpretation that the Joker was evil, if not outright Ax-Crazy, even before his fateful transformation, with the chemicals just making him worse.

Evil Cannot Comprehend Good: The Joker is Nihilism Incarnate: he believes that life is pointless and insane, and the only thing anyone can do is give into the madness. Life is a joke, and once he got the joke he never stopped laughing at it. One of the reasons he's obsessed with Batman is because Batman is The Anti-Nihilist: Batman also thinks, to some degree at least, that life is meaningless. But rather than embrace the madness, Batman fights against it, trying to bring order to chaos through his heroic actions. So Batman got the joke too, but he's not laughing, and the Joker doesn't understand why.

Evil Genius: Though rarely the focus of his character, Joker is usually an extremely gifted chemist, constantly creating new and better versions of his signature laughing gas. He's also (unsurprisingly) a skilled planner on par with Batman himself, in addition to being extremely charismatic and manipulative when he wants to be.

Evil Is Petty: Joker truly sees no difference between throwing cream pies, robbing a museum, and brutal, torturous mass-murder. To him, it's all just part of the joke.

Evil Sounds Deep: Jack Nicholson in Batman (1989) and Kevin Michael Richardson in The Batman both give the Joker a deep, sinister voice, contrasting his usual higher-pitched depictions in other works.

Facial Horror: His iconic "perma-clown" appearance (the green hair, chalk-white skin, and most of the time, red lips) is the result of being submerged in a tank of chemicals. However, there was times this has gotten worse.

Fame Through Infamy: He's practically built a career on crimes designed more to spread his infamy than anything else. Perhaps his true illness is that he is an Attention Whore through and through...

Faux Affably Evil: Often addresses others in a polite and friendly way before he unleashes merry hell on them.

Flanderization: Over the years, his actions have become almost exclusively focused on causing as much carnage and chaos as possible or harassing Batman and his allies rather than performing any non-lethal mischief or practical crime.

Foe Romance Subtext: Sometimes will mess with Batman's mind by calling him by pet names or using innuendo. Or outright groping him. According to later writers, Joker regards their hero/villain dynamic as a very special relationship, and resents anyone or thing that gets in the way of it (like all those family members Bruce enjoys hanging out with), which is disturbingly like a jealous lover.

Foil: To Batman in several ways. If the origin offered in Killing Joke is to be believed, both Batman and Joker had one bad day that put them on very different paths.

For the Evulz: The usual motives of the Joker. Many of his crimes always involve sowing chaos and the schadenfreude of other people's misery.

Freudian Excuse: Even he isn't sure of his own history and will crop up multiple reasons for his insanity. The most accepted version is that he was a thug named the Red Hood who gets disfigured falling into a vat while trying to escape Batman. His backstory still remains a mystery.

Freudian Excuse Is No Excuse: Best displayed in The Killing Joke: Joker's "one bad day" is just an excuse, as he neither knows nor cares if it actually happened that way, and Batman confronts him on how his attempt to similarly break Commissioner Gordon failed.Batman: Despite all your sick, vicious little games, he's as sane as he ever was! So maybe ordinary people don't always crack. Maybe there isn't any need to crawl under a rock with all the other slimey things when trouble hits. Maybe it was just you, all the time!

The Friend Nobody Likes: Often plays this role among villain team-ups. It's implied that the only reason the other DC villains ever invite him to things is because they're terrified of what he'll do to them if he's not. Alexander Luthor Jr.'s death at the end of Infinite Crisis is brought about because, as Lex Luthor puts it:Luthor: You made one big mistake. You didn't let the Joker play.

From Nobody to Nightmare: The key thing about his Multiple-Choice Past is that nobody really knows who he was before he put on the Red Hood and fell into a vat of acid. As such, Joker was literally a nobody... who turned into the DC Universe's scariest villain, and who at times has upstaged even Brainiac or Darkseid.

Frozen Face: Most depictions have his face as such, with his massive rictus grin being something he can't really stop doing.

Gadgeteer Genius: While he seems to be a chemist first and foremost, the Joker has no trouble coming up with a range of tools and weapons of his own design and is easily as smart as Batman in this area. Other stories show that he has a solid enough understanding of such varied fields as engineering, computers and even robotics that he can at least hijack the sophisticated inventions of others and use them for his own ends with no difficulty whatsoever, and he is generally implied (though rarely outright stated) to have had a scientific background prior to becoming the Clown Prince of Crime.

Glasgow Grin: Heath Ledger's portrayal features very noticeable scarring from such wounds and tells two conflicting stories of how he got them. Sometimes, Depending on the Artist, the Joker has one in the comics, usually in out-of-continuity stories.

Gonk: Depending on the Artist, he varies from "disfigured, but still fairly handsome" to "barely passes for human", the latter cases usually feature him with a really long and narrow nose and a huge, exaggerated mouth with a permanent Slasher Smile.

Guest Fighter: After making appearances in the previous crossover and being a major player in NetherRealm's other big series, Joker shows up in Mortal Kombat 11 all on his own, freed from the restrictions of a Teen rating and able to showcase the true depths of his depraved bloodlust.

Handshake of Doom: Often kills unsuspecting victims by offering a handshake. When the other person grabs his hand, their palm is pricked by a device that resembles a joy buzzer, which injects deadly venom into their blood stream.

Hate Sink: Posthumously, his Injustice-verse incarnation is the primary target for audience scorn and gets saddled with this role by everyone in the game, its sequel, and the tie-in comics — the version from the Injustice-verse itself, at least. This is because he tricked Superman into killing his own wife Lois Lane and nuking Metropolis, then pulling a Strike Me Down with All of Your Hatred on the poor guy who that set him on the path to becoming a tyrant, all for the sake of doing it, and because he was tired of losing to Batman, so he decided to go after an easier target. His role as The Corrupter to Harley is explained to make her redemption feel more plausible, as even she has come to despise him for his actions. In particular, while Superman does terrible things, he is portrayed as a Tragic Villain due to the losses he suffered before becoming a bad guy, and as such, his killing of the Joker is always played for maximum pathos. Even villains as despicable as Brainiac, Darkseid and Gorilla Grodd openly despise him. This even continues into his Guest Fighter appearance in Mortal Kombat 11note , where even the likes of Kano, Shang Tsung and Shao Kahn can't stand him.

Human Head on the Wall: There's a rather famous piece of comic book artwork◊ drawn by Brian Bolland featuring The Joker lounging in a chair in front of a trophy wall mounted with the decapitated heads of various DC heroes and villains, all of them painted white and their faces distorted into a smile like the Joker himself. It's even been parodied a bunch of times with other comic supervillains sitting in Joker's place.

Iconic Outfit:

I'm a Humanitarian: There have been a few times when the Joker engaged in cannibalism, such as an issue of Grant Morrison's JLAnote after Day Of Judgment, where upon the reveal that the Martian Manhunter took the League and the now Hal Jordan hosted-Spectre into the Joker's head, the Joker lamented eating a man's tongue raw. Additionally, an infamous bit in Emperor Joker has the Joker eat all of China while he had Mr. Mxyzptlk's powers.

Insane No More: Is cured by Batman forcing unknown pills down his throat in the non-canon Batman: White Knight, causing him go back to his real name, Jack Napier, make a Heel–Face Turn and accuse Batman of being part of the problem (he's also considerably better than the usual Joker, being closer to the earlier trickster personality).

I've Come Too Far: At the end of The Killing Joke, Batman tries to reason with the Joker, insisting that they've got to stop before one of them kills the other and offering to help rehabilitate him. Joker briefly considers the offer before solemnly turning it down.Joker: No. I'm sorry, but... no. It's too late for that. Far too late.

It Amused Me: His raison d'etre. Why kill people in horrific ways, ruin their lives, and generally make the entire universe a worse place than he left it? Because it's funny.

Jekyll & Hyde: Inverted in the case of Batman: White Knight, where taking pills cures Joker of his insanity and brings back his original Jack Napier persona. However, if he fails to take the pills, the Joker resurfaces, which is exactly what happens in Batman: Curse of the White Knight, and he's much worse than before.

Jerkass: Though that is a total understatement, Joker still more or less counts as one. When he isn't killing or torturing people for his own amusement, he's taunting them and trying get under other people's skin.

Joker Immunity: The trope namer. He was originally conceived as a one-off villain but proved too interesting a character to be killed off so quickly, and a last-minute edit had him survive instead. He's so famous for this that most works that kill him off, the audience doesn't buy it, and it serves as an effective twist the rare times when he is Killed Off for Real. But even those rare occasions may continue to feature him in flashbacks or hallucinations as a Posthumous Character.

Knife Nut: In many appearances, knives are his Weapon of Choice, either to disfigure his victims or kill his foes. Often both.The Joker: Do you want to know why I use a knife? Guns are too... quick. You can't savor all the little emotions. You see, in their last moments, people show you who you really are.

Large Ham: Holy shit, yes. He has an enormous sense of showmanship and is seen cracking Black Comedy jokes every minute, and it's a nigh-guarantee that whoever is portraying him will be munching the scenery to the very structure. Most especially the case if it happens to be Mark Hamill.

Laser-Guided Broadcast: In comic books as well in most of the media, when The Joker takes the control of TV and makes one of his menaces to threat and/or destroy Gotham City, good part of his message goes directly to Batman by tempting him to stop his plans, where usually destroy the city is just a secondary plan, getting/trapping/killing Batman as his real main plan.

Legacy Character: The idea of multiple Jokers is used in Gotham. There are two Jokers - Jerome Valeska, and his twin brother Jeremiah Valeska. The former is a deranged mass murderer who spread madness through Gotham. The latter is the actual Joker who becomes Batman's Arch-Enemy, and is even more dangerous than his predecessor.

Lethal Joke Character: In-Universe. Those unfamiliar with him tend to write him off as just some fool dressed as a clown, only to realize very quickly why they should keep their guard up around him. He's still one of the most dangerous characters in the DC Universe, despite existing in a world filled with super-humans and gods.

Master of Disguise: A talent he possesses even in his earliest stories. Joker is an expert with make-up, costumes and impersonations and has posed as everything from police officers to doctors to even Batman himself. He can go to extremely elaborate lengths to pull off his deceptions too, fabricating entire backstories and staying in-character for months at a time to see his plans through.

Mirthless Laughter: The Joker's constantly laughing, either at the pain and misery of others, the pain and misery he inflicts on others, or even his own pain. However, as describe by many and offered by the reader based on his scenes and what he does, there is NEVER any joy in his laughter. Never any real happiness. Just cruelty and mockery of pain and sorrow. If he does indeed have a tragic backstory that caused his madness, then this makes sense as he has chosen to laugh instead of cry. His statement about how the universe should end "so there won't be anymore people like me" during the Emperor Joker storyline lends weight to him being a Sad Clown.

Misanthrope Supreme: While it's not evident given Joker's Laughing Mad demeanor and his penchant for macabre jokes usually at the life and limb expense of someone else, Joker is actually absolutely full of hatred and spite towards basically everyone and the entire world. Several stories have gone into this and it's implied that the Joker finds it so easy to kill everyone around him, not because he feels nothing for them, but in fact because he loathes everyone aside from his twisted relationship with Batman.

Moment of Lucidity: There've been a few times when outside forces have sent him into a fit of temporary sanity over the years.

Monster Clown: One of the classic examples.

Multiple-Choice Past: Practically the poster child and possible trope namer. Even he isn't sure of his own history. The most accepted version introduced in Detective Comic #168 (1951) has him as a thug named the Red Hood who jumps into a vat of chemicals to escape Batman, disfiguring him and inspiring him to adopt the name Joker. Why he went by the name the Red Hood has changed over the years: The Killing Joke claims he was a failed comedian pressured into becoming a criminal to support his pregnant wife. The trauma of his disfigurement from jumping in the acid and his wife's earlier accidental death drove him insane. However, even this backstory is questionable, as the Joker himself calls it "multiple choice".

My God, What Have I Done?: Whenever he is made temporarily sane, most notably by a Lazarus pit after Ra's Al Ghul killed him after a Villain Team-Up and in JLA #15 during the Rock of Ages storyline, Joker usually expresses deep remorse for his crimes. Unfortunately it never lasts.

The Nicknamer: He's prone to giving nicknames to allies and enemies alike. Sometimes affectionate, sometimes snarky, but always undesired. Calling Batman "Batsy" or "Bats" and Robin "boy blunder" are probably his most iconic.

No Celebrities Were Harmed: Some of the Joker's victims fall into this.

No Name Given: The Joker is the only Batman villain who doesn't have an official real identity. However, there are three occasions where names have been used. The Jack Nicholson version used the name "Jack Napier", which was briefly mentioned in the Animated Series episode "Dreams In Darkness" since the series was partially based on the movie, albeit the doctors list it as one of his aliases. The Gotham version played by Cameron Monaghan gives him the name Jeremiah Valeska. The Joaquin Phoenix version used the name "Arthur Fleck", though the movie raises the question that he doesn't know who his father is, so 'Fleck' might not even be his surname. The Telltale series plays with this by 'naming' him 'John Doe' - which is just a stand-in name police/hospitals use when they don't know someone's identity. While he still has no official name to this day, it's general fan consensus that it's either Jack Napier or just Jack.

Not a Mask: Sometimes he pretends to wear makeup, but it ain't makeup. Jack Nicholson's version wore flesh-tone makeup over his pale skin several times after his transformation. Though, this is Depending on the Writer, as Heath Ledger's depiction does wear makeup. It's unclear if this is the case for Caesar Romero's depiction, as Romero's mustache is visible at times (he refused to shave for the part).

Not Me This Time: Though he certainly wouldn't mind committing them, he's been framed for murders he didn't commit several times, such as by James Gordon Jr.

Obfuscating Insanity: Zig Zagged Trope / Depending on the Writer. Some stories claims The Joker is actually sane, but pretends to be otherwise to avoid the death penalty. Others says he is genuinely crazy. It must be noted that Joker, like other Batman villains, was only identified as insane from the 70s onwards by various writers.note

Offscreen Villain Dark Matter: Despite the Joker's infamous reputation and violent instability he never has any issues finding new henchmen for his schemes nor does he ever has any issues finding the resources needed to pull off his often convoluted plans and he's often able to do it all without attracting the attention of Batman or the authorities until he's ready for them.

OOC Is Serious Business: A general rule of thumb: If the Joker isn't smiling, something very bad is about to happen.

The Only One Allowed to Defeat You: Pretty much sums up his feelings towards Batman. He often flies into a rage whenever someone else attempts to kill Batman when in his company, and whenever Batman (seemingly) dies he has a tendency to completely snap and turn sane. This actually goes the other direction as well: the Joker feels that Batman is the only one allowed to defeat him, and it's shown he's terrified of someone else doing him in in some continuities.

Outside-Context Problem: A recurring theme of Joker's "first appearance" stories in various adaptations is that nobody in Gotham is prepared for a guy who's only in it For the Evulz. Also, the Joker himself likes to find these, and exploit them.

Phrase Catcher: Back in his prankster phase during the Silver Age, whenever one of Joker's capers got foiled, someone would inevitably trot out the line "The joke's on you, Joker!" For obvious reasons, his current Monster Clown incarnation doesn't get this nearly as often.

Pimp Duds: He sometimes accessorizes his purple suit with a very wide-brimmed hat, which makes the ensemble look like a stereotypical pimp costume. Jared Leto's turn in Suicide Squad (2016) runs with this in his dynamic with Harley Quinn.

Pre-Insanity Reveal: The Joker, depending on the version, may have been an ordinary comedian before he went crazy and became a super-villain.

Purple Is Powerful: Purple is one of Joker's three colors (along with white and green) and he is powerful.

Psychopathic Manchild: For starters, when Batman is telling Joker to stay away from the Gordons after he apparently hurt Gordon's wife (it was actually his son, Gordon Jr. who did the deed), Joker commented that he didn't do anything to "the old bitch", and starts commenting to Batman that he misses the old Batman, and commented that he "doesn't want to go to bed yet" and that he "wants to play."

Redemption Rejection: In The Killing Joke, Batman defeats the Joker once again and then desparately pleads with him to accept help recovering from his madness before they eventually kill each other. In one of his rare, completely serious moments, the Joker sincerely apologizes and tells Batman that it's far too late for that.

The Resenter: Joker has often shown resentment towards people in many ways in different stories. The best example is him being resentful of anyone who garners more attention from Batman than him and anyone he sees as "stealing his act", i.e. being a laughing mad, jokey maniac cramping his style (The Creeper in Batman TAS). Regardless, many of his crimes and attitudes often carry an undercurrent or resentment be it towards to Bat-family because he resents sharing Batman with anyone or normal people for living their mundane lives free of care. Given how much spite seems to fuel his rampages, Joker's probably got a mountain of resentment inside of him.

Restoration of Sanity: On occasion, Joker's sanity will suddenly return to him, usually in stories where Batman retires or is believed to have died. His reactions tend to vary - sometimes we don't see how he reacts to what he did, but other times he actually shows genuine regret for his actions. Of course, these never tend to stick.

The Reveal: When Batman sat in Metron's chair in Darkseid War, one of the questions he asked was who the Joker was and the answer freaked him out. In DC Rebirth, it's revealed why:  The Joker is a Legacy Character: the Joker responsible for Death of the Family and Batman: Endgame is not the same man who crippled Barbara Gordon—and neither of them are the original Joker.

Riddle for the Ages: Being the Trope Namer for Multiple-Choice Past, it's unknown who he was before falling into an acid tank and whether he was nuts even before being dunked. He even believes his origins, Depending on the Writer of course.Joker: They throw me out, and I had a wife and an unborn child… or it was two cows and a goat? Sometimes it's so confusing…

Rule of Funny: One of his primary themes (alongside insanity), as explained in Whatever Happened to the Caped Crusader?: "Kid. I'm the Joker. I don't just randomly kill people. I kill people when it's funny. What would conceivably be funny about killing you?"

Secret Identity Apathy: In most continuities, he simply doesn't care about Batman's Secret Identity, understanding that Batman is the true face and not the man behind the mask. It's shown sometimes that the Joker will actually be upset if someone outs Batman's identity to him, usually because it spoils their dynamic in some way. When Scarecrow pulls off Bruce's mask in Harley Quinn, it practically triggers a Villainous Breakdown.Joker: Half the fun of our relationship was the mystery! Now I know Batman is just some boring, rich asshole with parental issues!

Self-Made Orphan: In The Brave and the Bold #31, Atom reads his mind and sees The Joker burning his parents alive after they catch him killing animals.

Slasher Smile: He wears one almost by default. Reportedly, it was inspired by this photo◊ of Conrad Veidt in character as Gwynplaine (a man with a disfigured face, causing him to have a perpetual grin) in The Man Who Laughs by Victor Hugo.

The Sociopath: A skilled and gleeful manipulator, a vicious butcher who brutally tortures and murders others simply because he thinks it’s funny, extraordinarily impulsive given that he’s prone to turning his murderous urges on his own men on a whim or because one upset him in some way, shape or form, and has not even the vaguest notion of empathy, neither for his men or his victims.

The Spook: His backstory is an eternal Riddle for the Ages. DC Comics refuses to take an official stance on this.

Start of Darkness: Detective Comics #168 posits he was a laboratory worker who becomes the Red Hood in order to steal a million dollars from his employers and retire. In The Killing Joke he quits his job to become a comedian, but fails and is coerced by mobsters to commit a robbery, becoming the Red Hood. His disfigurement and (in The Killing Joke) his wife's death earlier in the story destroy what little was left of his sanity and he becomes The Joker. Maybe.

Stealing the Handicapped Spot: He doesn't do this. Rather, he hates it when other people do it and finds it hilarious to horrifically cripple them so they can legitimately park in handicapped spots.

Straw Nihilist: Provides the trope image and is the poster child for this. He claims that everything in life is just "one big joke" and death is the ultimate punchline. Joker also believes that "a bad day" is more than enough for anyone to turn out like him. This is shown notably in Injustice: Gods Among Us, The Killing Joke, and The Dark Knight. The Red Lantern Atrocitus even wonders what drove Joker to nihilism during an intro banter with the clown in Injustice 2.

Strong as They Need to Be: His fighting skills fluctuate wildly. Sometimes, Joker is an excellent fighter who can actually defeat Batman in a straight-up fight, whereas most writers prefer to present him as so weak that he can be knocked out cold with one punch.

Stupid Evil: Depending on the writer, The Joker can sometimes fall under this, where his cruelty and sadism tend to lead to his own death at the hands of all the people he's wronged.

To Create a Playground for Evil: His motivation in stories like Emperor Joker.

Too Kinky to Torture: The Joker has shown a proclivity for this over the years. At one point, the Joker berated a man who'd captured him for only hitting him in the face and The Dark Knight similarly sees the Joker berate Batman during the the latter's beating of him. He also enjoyed his and Bruce's final fight in The Dark Knight Returns. Salvation Run had established the Joker's been in constant pain since he took his fateful dive into the vat of chemicals that altered his appearance and not only had gotten used to it, but grew to enjoy it. This quote from The Dark Knight sums it up perfectly: Stephens: I can tell the difference between punks who need a little lesson in manners, and the freaks like you who would just enjoy it.

Tombstone Teeth: He is often drawn with too many too-long teeth as part of his trademark rictus grin, highlighting his nature as a psychotic and sadistic killer.

Troll: Most incarnations of the Joker dress themselves as being a lethal one of these. The best example is his DC Animated Universe version, who tailored each of his schemes as a joke or a prank, and sometimes even lectured his underlings on the importance of proper buildup and delivery when telling a joke. Batman in particular is the Joker's preferred victim, and many a Joker has refused to kill or unmask a Batman dead to rights, simply because it would spoil the fun of trolling him. But when others upstage or taunt him, he really goes nuts, as it's one of his Berserk Buttons.

Unreliable Narrator: Even he isn't sure of his own history, so anything he claims is suspect at best.

Villain Has a Point: Given his devotion to Rule of Funny, he's quite knowledgeable on what makes successful comedy, as seen with the featured image on Don't Explain the Joke.

Villain Song: There's no other villain who has belted out as many memorable music moments, not even the Music Meister. Three of them incidentally were sung by Mark Hamill behind the mic:

Villainous Aromantic Asexual: He is shown to be more interested in his schemes and mayhem rather than sex. He has had sex with Harley, but it is implied that it's more for her rather than his own enjoyment. He has actively ignored her when he simply wants to work on his schemes, even when she's in the translucent red night dress.

Villainous Friendship: No matter how bad things turned out last time, Lex Luthor and Joker will always work together again. Played With, as it isn’t just because of friendship. As Luthor himself notes in the ending of Infinite Crisis, you always "let the Joker play," lest he come after you for revenge later on for leaving him out.

Villainous Harlequin: He was this during the Silver Age. He is also this in Batman (1966) and Batman: The Brave and the Bold.

Villainous Rescue: In Dark Nights: Metal, The Joker pulls this off by teaming up with Batman to defeat the Batman Who Laughs, Batman knowing that a jokerized Batman would have the upper hand teams up with the Joker. It is so unexpected that the Batman Who Laughs, who is still prepared for anything Batman would conceivably think of, is unable to counter it let alone even consider it a possibility.

Villain Protagonist: He was the star of his own nine issue self-titled series from 1975 to 1976. In order to adhere to the Comics Code Authority, The Bad Guy Wins was never in effect - while he usually managed to get one over on other villains, each issue would end the Joker being apprehended for his crimes. He also got his own movie in which Batman didn't even exist yet, delving deep into what someone would have to go through to become the Joker.

Weapon of Choice: The acid-spitting flower, Smilex/Joker Venom... and simple crowbars, established by how he killed Jason Todd.

You Gotta Have Blue Hair: He has neon green hair caused by the chemicals he fell into.

[malecsecretsanta]

Merry Christmas, @greentealycheejelly!

Written for the lovely @greentealycheejelly for the Malec Secret Santa 2018 exchange! You said that you liked "canon au, fluff, angst, and action" so I tried to hit those tropes!

Read on AO3

*****

all night (or a hundred years)

Alec’s pencil makes a scratching sound as he scribbles into his notebook. “Thank you for that update, Luke.” Alec shuffles through his notes. “Next order of business… Raphael, any updates on that mundane found dead by the DuMort?”

“My clan is still looking into it, but I’ll let you know as soon as they find something.”

Alec nods. “Thank you, please do. Magnus is also following up on a lead as we speak.”

“So that explains his absence,” Meliorn says, an annoyed lilt to his tone.

Alec quirks an eyebrow. “Yes, because he’s on an assignment.”

“A special assignment from the Head of the Institute?” Meliorn huffs and leans forward, resting his elbows on the table. “I don’t believe you were nearly as gracious when I had to take a leave of absence last month. I wonder why that is?”

“Are you implying something, Meliorn?” It takes all of his years of training to reign in the fire bubbling in Alec’s veins.

“Cut it out, you two,” Luke interjects. “Alec, you said there was a lot on the agenda, and we’ll never get through it at this rate.”

Alec takes a deep breath, centering himself. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”

“I’m not,” Meliorn says flippantly, and Alec’s about ready to snap his pen in half.

Footsteps squeak against the linoleum floor as someone approaches their congregation. Magnus hurries over to them carrying a decaying, leather-bound book and a stack of yellowing parchment.

He wears a pair of tight, black skinny jeans that hug him in all the right places and a sheer, short-sleeved top that showcases his strong arms. Sky blue and lilac flowers are embroidered throughout the black mesh, interspersed between patches of gorgeous bronze skin, and Alec has to look away before he swoons. The universe is truly testing him today.

“I apologize for my tardiness,” Magnus says, pulling out the empty chair next to Alec.

They’re so close that Magnus’ breath tickles the back of Alec’s neck on the hiss of his ‘s,’ sending a warm shiver throughout his whole body. Magnus’ hand brushes against Alec’s as he sits down beside him, and it takes longer than it should for Alec to get his breathing under control.

“No, problem, Magnus,” Alec manages to stammer out. “We all understand.”

“Do we?” Raphael raises an eyebrow, and Luke (not so) discreetly elbows him in the ribs. He swears under his breath in Spanish.

“Right, so what did I miss?” Magnus asks.

“Alec was just telling us about the special assignment he had you working on.” Meliorn’s voice is as thick as honey and drips with the weight of heavy implication.

Alec clears his throat to try and distract from the way color bleeds into his cheeks as if he was in the heat of battle or had a bit too much to drink at the Hunter’s Moon.

“Alexander, are you alright?” Magnus asks, placing a hand on Alec’s shoulder.

“I’m fine.” Alec’s voice cracks at the end of the word.

“Are you sure? You’re turning crimson.” Magnus’ mahogany eyes hold concern and a genuine regard for Alec’s well being. It’s overwhelming being caught in such a gorgeous, compassionate gaze. “Do you have time to stop by my apothecary later? I want to get a proper look at you.”

Raphael gives Meliorn a knowing look and mutters, “Playing doctor?”

“Get your mind out of the gutter, Raphael,” Magnus chastises. “You know I take care of my friends.”

Friends. The word stings more than kuri venom; it lingers far longer than any demon attack ever could. It lingers in Alec’s mind when he’s tossing and turning at night imagining what they could have been if Alec hadn’t been such a coward all those years ago. It lingers in his heart whenever they’re alone, and Alec swears he sees a glimmer of those feelings Magnus must have buried long ago. And it lingers in his soul whenever they work together as allies, as leaders, as partners, because they really are compatible in all the ways that count.

But none of that matters, because they’re just friends.

“Thank you for the offer, but I have some work I really need to catch up on,” Alec says.

He doesn’t miss the way Magnus looks almost disappointed; it tugs at something in his chest, and regret pools in his gut, but then he reminds himself that he must be imagining it. There’s no reason why Magnus would be disappointed at not getting to spend time with him.

“Another time then,” Magnus says.

“So, how did your mission go?” Luke asks, steering the meeting back on track.

“Well, it was certainly interesting to say the least.” Magnus shuffles through his stack of papers and fishes out a few blown up photographs, sliding them to the center of the table. “Raphael sent over these photos of the burn patterns on that mundane found by the DuMort.”

“Right, you thought they might be Edomei in nature?” Alec prompts.

“Precisely,” Magnus confirms. “But I had to track down one of my more… unseemly contacts to be sure.”

“What did they say?” Meliorn asks, and Alec’s relieved that he finally seems to have dropped the teasing and focused on work.

Magnus licks his finger and leafs through the decrepit tome, scouring the pages for whatever he’s looking for. When he finds it, he turns the book towards the others.

“Dragons?” Raphael asks, incredulous.

“Dragons have been extinct for centuries.” Meliorn waves him off.

“Mostly extinct,” Alec corrects. “There have been about half a dozen dragon demon sightings in the last century.”

“That’s not extinct enough.” Luke shakes his head. “When was the last sighting?”

“I believe last week,” Magnus says.

“You think a dragon demon killed that mundane?” Raphael asks, tilting his head to the side.

“I don’t think, I know.” Raphael opens his mouth to speak, but Magnus continues on before he has the chance. “I brought a sample of the ash found at the scene to my contact, and they confirmed it was the same ash produced by a dragon’s hellfire.”

“Why would a dragon be stalking my hotel?” Raphael looks skeptical. “And how come we haven’t seen it yet?”

“Perhaps you have something it’s looking for,” Magnus suggests.

“My abuelita’s award winning empanada recipe?”

“Or a solid gold casket,” Magnus suggests.

They table the issue for now, deciding to have Alec dispatch extra patrol teams to cover the area around the DuMort while they conduct more research, and move on with the rest of the meeting agenda. Meliorn launches into a complaint about mermaids swimming in the Central Park entrance to the Seelie realm, but Alec barely hears a word of it. He’s too focused on the way the light streaming through the Institute’s stained glass windows hits Magnus just right, casting him in a warm, ethereal glow.

He looks beautiful, incredible, otherworldly. Then again, he always does. And Alec is so in love with him.

A few days later, Alec finishes typing up the meeting minutes and sends them out in a quick email to the rest of the Cabinet. As soon as he hits send, he folds his laptop shut, and drops his head to his desk, letting out a muffled groan into the treated wood. It’s certainly been a week.

A knock on the door sends him scrambling, but when he looks up, Izzy’s already standing in the doorway, arms crossed with a knowing smile playing at her ruby-red lips.

“Rough day?” she asks as she crosses the room and takes a seat on the couch.

“Something like that.” he says, joining her. His head is pounding, whether from banging it on his desk, worrying about the murdered mundane, or embarrassing himself in front of Magnus, he’s not sure, but probably all three. “What’s on your mind?”

“I just wanted to check on you. You seem… stressed.” She rests her hand on his knee and gives it a soft squeeze.

“I’m fine, Iz.” He shakes her off, scooting down the sofa. “Just busy.” Busy hiding. “Speaking of, any updates from the patrol teams?”

She shakes her head ‘no.’ “So far they say everything looks normal near the DuMort.”

“That’s good.” Alec gets up and heads over to his desk. “Is that all? Because I have a lot of work to—”

“You can’t keep hiding this from him.”

Alec freezes, his feet glued to the spot but his heart beating so fast it might break through his chest and run away. Alec wants to run away with it. He’s not ready to have this conversation; he’s never going to have this conversation, because there’s nothing to discuss. He and Magnus are colleagues, nothing more.

“He deserves to know how you feel.”

At that, Alec turns to face her. “Why does it matter how I may or may not feel? Magnus is an adult, not some pining teenager. I’m sure he’s fine without me.” He realizes that he’s gripping the edge of his desk when his hand starts to cramp, and he quickly pulls it away to relieve the ache.

She raises an eyebrow. “When did I say I was talking about Magnus?”

Dammit. Alec deflates, caught by his far too perceptive baby sister, and all of his confidence and bravado dissolves as he slumps back down on the couch with her. “How did you know?” He doesn’t dare look at her, just stares down at his hands in his lap.

“You’re not exactly subtle,” she says, trying to be gentle.

“Do you think he knows?” Alec doesn’t want to know the answer.

“Honestly?”

“Honestly.”

“I think you should find that out for yourself.”

Alec sighs. “It’s not gonna change anything.”

Izzy inches closer to him on the couch and rests her hand on his back, rubbing circles into his shirt with her thumb. “But it might.” She looks up at him with warm eyes. “And you deserve to be happy.”

Alec cracks a smile and wraps an arm around her side, pulling her in closer. He presses a kiss to the top of her head, and the scent of her floral shampoo tickles his nose. “Thank you for looking out for me, but I promise you, I’m fine.”

“And stubborn as all hell,” Izzy tries to mutter under her breath.

“What was that?” Alec asks, and Izzy perks up, quickly uttering, “Nothing!” just a pitch too high.

“You know.” She presses the back of her hand to his forehead. “You feel a little warm. Are you feeling well?”

Alec tilts his head to the side, confused by the direction the conversation has turned. “Yeah?”

“Well, it’s flu season. I think you should get checked out.” Her eyes drift away from his face and focus on the couch upholstery. “I heard Magnus has a friends and family discount for check ups.”

Heat flames from the tops of Alec’s cheeks to his ears to down his neck. He wants to ask her how she found out about that but realizes that she was probably eavesdropping during the Cabinet meeting. Knowing Iz, she had her ear pressed to the door like they used to do when they were kids, and their parents were hosting representatives from the Clave.

“I think I’ll take him up on that offer.”

Alec could keep fighting her on this until she finally dropped it, but then she’d just give him the cold shoulder for the rest of the day and he’d feel guilty, or he could play along with the out she’s giving him like he really wants to. If anyone asks, he’s going over to Magnus’ to see if he has any new intel on the dragon demon investigation, but he and Izzy know the truth.

Though he doesn’t want to admit it, Alec would use any excuse to see Magnus.

“Alexander.”

Magnus says his name like he’s savoring the taste on his tongue. It sends goosebumps down Alec’s arms. He gestures Alec inside, closing the door behind him with a snap of his fingers. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

Alec wipes his clammy hands on his jeans and prays to Raziel that Magnus doesn’t notice the way his hands shake when he does. Alec spent the entire walk over rehearsing what he was going to say and practicing his confidence, but all of his meticulous planning and false resolve melts away as soon as he comes face to face with Magnus.

“I was in the neighborhood.” About 45 minutes away from your apartment. “So, I just thought I’d stop by.” Alec wets his chapped lips with the swipe of his tongue. “And, uh, see if that offer for a proper check up was still on the table. I’m not feeling well.” I needed any excuse to see you.

Magnus’ lips curl into a smile, his lip gloss glinting under the soft lamp light, and Alec imagines what it would be like to tug him by the jacket and kiss him senseless.

“For you? Always.”

Magnus guides Alec into his apothecary and sits him down on a leather stool. He flits about the room, collecting jars with concerning labels like “Giants’ Toes” and “Snake Tears” and rifling around drawers and cabinets for tools and magical oddities. He pokes and prods Alec with so many things, Alec actually breathes a sigh of relief at the sense of familiarity when Magnus draws out a mundane stethoscope — primitive though it may be.

Magnus stands behind him, instructing Alec to breathe normally, as he listens through the device. He presses two fingers to Alec’s wrist and checks his watch, taking Alec’s pulse. Then takes it again a minute later.

“Your breathing is a little shallow, and your heart rate is slightly alarming, but besides that, everything else seems normal.”

Alec swallows down the urge to tell Magnus that it’s because of him. “Thanks for the check up. Any recommendations, doc?”

Magnus pretends to think about it. “Spend the whole day in bed.”

Magnus’ eyes widen as soon as he realizes the implication laced in what he just said, and he drops the stethoscope. Alec moves to pick it up at the same time as Magnus. Their hands brush as they reach for the cool metal. Their eyes meet, and Alec feels the temperature in the room increase by about twenty degrees.

The moment is interrupted by an alarm screeching from Alec’s back pocket. He yanks his phone out and swipes over the screen. A red angelic power rune flashes, and Alec scrolls up to read the distress signal.

“One of my patrols.” There’s a delay as his words catch up to his mind, and he reads and rereads the alert. “They were ambushed by the dragon demon. Down in Astoria.”

Alec grabs his leather jacket off of the back of the chair he tossed it on when he first arrived and scans the room, trying to remember where he left his bow.

“Give me the coordinates. I’ll make a portal.”

Alec opens his mouth to protest but then thinks better of it. There’s nothing he can say that will dissuade Magnus from coming along, because that’s the kind of man Magnus is. People are in danger, so he’s going to help. There’s no argument to be made.

It’s one of the infinite things Alec loves about him.

Magnus takes the phone from Alec. He stands in the center of the room and circles his arms, glowing orange magic flaming at his fingertips as he conjures a portal. The air grows thin as the vortex sucks out all of the room’s oxygen — like a vacuum. Magnus looks to Alec to make sure he’s ready. Alec slings his bow and quiver over his shoulder and stands beside Magnus in front of the portal.

Magnus laces their fingers together, and they leap.

Alec doesn’t let go when they step through the portal. They emerge near the Hell Gate Bridge, which Alec thinks is fitting given the circumstances. He hears the crash of rushing water coming from the Hudson and a shriek unlike anything he’s ever heard before.

Footsteps crescendo up the asphalt path he and Magnus are standing on as Underill sprints over to them. He’s out of breath by the time he catches up to them, panting as he rests his hands on his knees. Alec finally realizes that he and Magnus are still holding hands and releases his grip.

“The demon… sir…” Underhill tries in between breaths. “Lindsay and Raj—”

“Are they okay?” Alec prompts.

Magnus summons a bottle of water and passes it to Underhill, who swallows down the whole thing in three gulps. “They’re alive,” Underhill says, “but they need medical attention.”

Alec turns to Magnus. “Can you keep the portal open?” Magnus nods, and Alec shifts his attention back to Underhill. “I need you to take them to the infirmary.”

“But, sir, what about you—” Underhill tries to protest.

“Magnus and I have it covered. Now hurry up; that’s an order.”

Underhill helps Lindsay and Raj to their feet, slinging their arms over each of his shoulders, and dragging them through the portal. Alec has his bow drawn and ready, surveying the area for the dragon demon to cover them while they make their escape. As soon as Underhill ushers them through, Magnus seals the portal behind him.

Alec hears a flapping sound and a sudden gust of wind knocks him off his feet.

“Alexander, are you alright?” Magnus asks as he kneels down to help Alec up.

Alec dusts himself off. “Yeah, I’m fine— Magnus, look out!”

They duck just as a giant flying mass swoops above them. It fills the air around them with a rancid stench, like rotting flesh and spoiled eggs but a hundred times worse. The scent is as ingrained in Alec as the sound of Izzy’s laugh or Max’s favorite book. Demon ichor.

Alec looks up and sees the unmistakable silhouette of a dragon. Its emerald scales glisten under the afternoon sun as two wings, at least ten feet each in length, flap to keep the beast afloat. Six ivory horns protrude from the top of its head and smoke flares from the tip of its snout. It opens its mouth to let out another piercing scream, so sharp it could shatter glass, and reveals a mountain range of jagged teeth. But what Alec can’t stop staring at is the dragon’s eyes — as pitch black as coal and as cold as a January blizzard.

The demon launches up about fifty feet in the air in five seconds, and Magnus and Alec make a run for it, taking cover behind a stone fence.

“What do we do?” Alec asks, breath coming out in pants.

“I don’t know. You’re the one who hunts demons for a living.”

“But I’ve never hunted a dragon.”

The demon barrels towards them, its body spinning like a lethal projectile. They dart away in opposite directions just as the demon collides with the fence and shatters it. The demon clenches its jaw, almost like it’s charging an attack, and Alec realizes that it’s readying a fiery breath.

He braces for heat, but instead, the demon opens its mouth and shoots out a bolt of lightning, scorching the earth below. Magnus hurls an orange pulse of magic at the dragon, and it cries out when the blast connects. Alec nocks an arrow and launches it at the demon’s abdomen, and the demon retreats behind a patch of trees, black blood dripping as it goes.

“I think we made it angry,” Magnus notes.

“Could be worse.”

The demon charges towards them again, plowing down the bramble of trees in its path, but it swoops upwards and abruptly stops as soon as it reaches Alec. Its motion sends an even stronger gust of wind Alec’s way, knocking his quiver off his shoulder, and the demon breathes out a bolt of lightning, destroying all of Alec’s arrows.

Alec, rendered defenseless against an aerial target, runs as fast as his legs will take him away from the dragon. Magnus throws a ball of energy at the demon’s head, his glamour dropped in the heat of battle revealing two golden cat eyes. Rather than go after Magnus, the demon seems to want to finish what it started with Alec, accelerating towards him after recovering from Magnus’ attack.

Alec runs towards an open plane — cover nowhere close enough. The dragon takes the opportunity to breathe out another barrage of lightning.

Magnus’ piercing cat eyes dart from the dragon to Alec, and in a split second decision, Magnus hurls out a pulse of magic that sends Alec flying. As he’s launched through the air, Alec watches the dragon’s blast collide with Magnus, shooting electricity throughout his whole body. Magnus cries out in pain but lashes out with every last drop of magic he has.

Alec passes out as soon as he hits the stone wall of the bridge.

Alec comes to gradually. He feels warm sensations tickling his skin, like he’s bathing in a bed of silk, and the soft hum of familiar blue flames coaxing him awake. Magnus.

Alec blinks his eyes open, wincing as his eyes adjust to the light from the setting sun, and moves to sit up. A sharp pain shoots up through his chest where he collided with the bridge. It feels like a shard of glass is traveling through his veins, and for all he knows, maybe that’s what’s happening.

Gentle hands nudge Alec back down, and an arm wraps around his back, pulling him closer to a chest that beats as rapidly as his own.

“I’m sorry, angel. I’m not done healing you yet,” Magnus’ soothes.

Alec grimaces as Magnus’ magic stitches his skin back together, healing bruised ribs and mending broken bones. Magnus works with the skilled hands of a surgeon but with the delicate care of a NICU nurse, only moving Alec when absolutely necessary to minimize the pain.

“I know it hurts.” Magnus’ voice sounds like a lullaby. “But I’m almost done.”

Alec reaches up, his fingers brushing Magnus’ cheek. The simple motion takes far more energy than it should — a testament to just how serious his impact with the wall was — but it could have been so much worse if it was the dragon’s lightning blast he faced instead of the rough concrete.

“You threw yourself in front of the demon, that could’ve killed you.” Alec groans as Magnus mends a particularly tender muscle. “Why would you risk your life to save me?”

Magnus stops healing him for a moment and shakes his head, a soft smile playing at his lips. “You stupid Nephilim,” Magnus chides, but his tone is light, as if he were scolding Alec for having dessert before dinner. “You honestly haven’t figured it out by now?”

“Figured what out—” Alec starts to ask, but then it dawns on him and suddenly the last few years of their relationship click into place.

All of the late nights poring over ancient texts until dawn broke at the Manhattan skyline. The biweekly updates to the Institute wards Magnus assured him were standard protocol. The charged glances across the room at Clave functions and the casual touches during post-Cabinet meeting drinks at the Hunter’s Moon. Every moment that Alec cursed himself for reading too much into.

He was right.

“By the Angel, I’m an idiot.”

Magnus chuckles, beaming down at Alec’s head in his lap. He absentmindedly runs his fingers though Alec’s hair as a sad smile tugs at his lips. “I’m sorry for bringing this up now. I know it’s not the time, especially when… I know you don’t feel the same.” Magnus looks away, but his fingers still tangle in Alec’s hair.

“What? No, I—” Alec moves to sit up again and regrets it immediately, stumbling back into Magnus’ lap. “I want to be your idiot.”

Magnus’ eyes widen, his rich brown irises glamouring his natural gold, and he sits back on his heels. He looks shocked and scared and ready to flee as soon as he can, like a trapped deer, but after learning that Magnus feels the same, Alec will never let him go. He’s wasted too much time already that could have been theirs.

“I’ve been in love with you since we defeated that Circle member together.”

“Alexander,” Magnus says, “that was years ago.”

“I know.”

“I clearly made my affections known back then.” His Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows down a breath. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because you terrified me.”

Magnus’ face falls, and he looks as though Alec just stabbed him in the heart. Alec has unknowingly played with his heart and disappointed Magnus so many times throughout their relationship, and he’s tired of it. He’s done hurting Magnus. Magnus deserves so much better.

“You’re the most incredible man alive, and I didn’t deserve you. I still don’t,” Alec clarifies. “You were also the first guy I ever had real feelings for, and I was afraid that you’d break my heart. But now I see that’s all I’ve done to you.”

“You still don’t see how special you are, Alexander.”

“Not with you right above me.”

Magnus leans down and presses his lips to Alec’s. Magnus tastes like everything Alec imagined he would, from the cool mint of his lipgloss to the salt of his skin and the fire of his soul, Alec loves it all. Alec cups his hand around Magnus cheek, and Magnus tugs at his hair. Alec licks into the wet, hot heat of Magnus’ mouth, savoring every last moment with this beautiful man he craves so desperately.

When they part, Magnus whispers, “So, you want to be my idiot?”

Alec wouldn’t have it any other way.

[tumblunni]

Man i really should like... Meticulously go through every single thing i ever watched as a kid and try and find out if there are any other faves i forgot about. It could be fun to draw an ensemble piece of all the science villains in my bigass loving heart! I think warpnik would probably be the most obscure of those tho.

OH wait maybe i just abruptly remembered him cos Maddiman kinda vaguely reminds me of him, sorta? Both got the same weird not-white-guy-pink-but-literal-pink skintone, goofy hair, nasally voice, being strangely adorable, etc.

OH MAN i even remember the plot of his damn episode now! He was robotnik's non evil cousin that he banished to an alternate dimension that ended up turning him mad so he ended up a villain too. SO THATS WHERE MY SQUISKER AND MCKRAKEN HEADCANONS MUST HAVE COME FROM!

And i cant remember anything else about the episode except that even as a kid i found it annoying and rude how they made fun of his speech impediment. Like do you ever hate those voices? Voices where its clearly a badly done parody of some actual voice of some demographic they look down on, and its hard to articulate that you hate the voice but not the real thing its based on, and you also hate the fact theyre mentally associating this intentionally annoying voice with that demographic and reinforcing the idea that their normal voices are also inherantly horrible and funny? I felt that way about this dude and his lisp cos i also have a lisp, but its more often done with the 'cartoon simpleton voice' aka downs syndrome/other disability stereotype, and of course the 'sassy independant black woman who aint need no man' and the 'scary deep voiced black man thug' and the 'ching chong high pitched generic all asian cultures at the same time' goddamn thing. Why was this treated like the height of humor in the 90s and why is it still around today??

Oh also i remember that this dude stuck in my memory so much cos even though he was an antagonist he wasnt really the bad guy. Like he had a very legit reason to hate robotnik and it was just 'whoops sonic and co got caught in the crossfire'. Made me kinda sad that in the end they never set him free from that warp prison dimension place, but he still kinda 'wins' the episode and that was very memorable to me as a kid. Sonic manages to escape while leaving robotnik trapped, and warpnik is like "HELL YEAH REVENGE TIME" and thats just where it ends. So its not really ACTUALLY a proper sympathetic villain plot or anything but it was like baby me's first introduction to the concept of sympathetic villains? I was always used to my fave characters being bad and hated, but this time the guy kinda got a mildly happy ending sorta. Vaguely. Robotnik is just back with no explanation in the next episode cos that show kinda didnt care about sequential storytelling. But hey that leaves room open for me to headcanon that warpnik also managed to escape and he's off somewhere now being like "oh my god i missed the grass and the stars" and yeah maybe he's still kinda 'warped' from the experience but he has a chance of recovery now. Cos seriously even as a seven year old i could see that this dude was a stereotype of mental illness. Like just.. EVERY mental illness. Man, 'comic book crazy' is another trope that i never understood why it was funny and im glad its died.

OH maybe i relate to mad scientists cos i guess the way theyre treated by other characters felt similar to how adults treated us autistic kids???

I dunno man. Maybe theres no reason and i just wish i had a cool science dad/uncle/grandpa cos thats Objectively The Greatest Thing. YOU COULD HAVE SO MANY ADVENTURES TOGETHER!!! and heal his broken heart from traumatic backstory appearances cos WHY DO I KEEP TAKING MINOR FUNNYMANS AND MAKING THEM SAD oh yeah cos Yokai Watch(tm) validated me with that actually being canon for once EVERYONE GO PLAY YOKAI WATCH OK

Dr maddiman best

Dr warpnik almost as best

Its like that 'X walked so Y could run' meme

U gots to wotch the shows of not be screentime to they science gramps tp someday find the thing that do!!!

Man im fuckin hyper

[fantasticworldoffanfics]

DEREK/STILES

                                            ——— (part 8) ——–

Fandom: TeenWolf

Even a longer list of fanfics :)….

top favourites, more top favourites, part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8

Whatever He Wants, Part Two

Author: GentlyWithAChainsaw, orphan_account

Summary: Stiles just adores being Derek's new omega.

Hey There Little Red...

Author: 1lostone

Summary: Stiles knew that agreeing to meet Lydia in the middle of the damn woods, in the middle of the damn night wasn't one of his best ideas. Really. He did.

Betting Body Part Series

Author: Therefore_dubious (orphan_account)

Part 1: A Bet's a Bet

Summary: Stiles loses a bet against Derek, which means he has to do everything Derek wants for 24 hours.

Part 2: A Bet’s a Bet’s a Bet

Summary: This time around Derek loses the bet.

A Ship Without a Mate

Author: sarcasmandirony

Summary: Stiles persuades Scott into checking out the old ship anchored by the docks, of which Derek is captain.

Settle Down

Author: wearing_tearing, whatthehale

Summary: Stiles is a struggling author barely making ends meet.Derek is a successful architect whose biological clock is ticking. Enter a surrogacy agency, two packs, and a particularly sticky and toe curling heat week and you get a match made in heaven.

Hello, Heartbreaker

Author: astoryaboutwar

Summary: It’s a popular joke among Alphas: fuck an Omega, get heartbreak on your hands. Omegas are fragile little emotional things, needy and whiny. Stiles refuses to become that, or to believe that he’s anything like that.Stiles and Derek have been fuckbuddies for a while when Derek loses his memories of the past three years - and them - in an accident.

Just Act Normal

Author: zosofi

Summary: If someone had told Stiles back in high school that he would be an Oscar winning actor by the time he turned 25, he would’ve probably told Scott to punch them. The thing is, though…they would’ve been right.Which makes returning to Beacon Hills, center of all that is supernatural and better left avoided, all the more awkward.

From the Wreckage

Author: SuperfluousEmi, Winchesterek

Summary: The only thing Stiles wanted was a little freedom. He wanted to be able to walk where he wanted in the forest, wanted to be able to do what he wanted when he wanted and most of all he wanted to be an adult, especially because he was one. The last thing he wanted was to feel trapped by the Argent's rules about curfew. He understood that there were werewolves and getting too close to the were-border was dangerous, but hell if he was going to let that stop him from having a little fun.Needless to say, fun was overrated and all Stiles wanted was to go home to his friends and father now.

Ain’t Nothing So Good As The Cake And Eating It

Author: sofonisba_found

Summary: Derek thinks he's doing alright in life, with his family at his side and a job he loves. Despite his family's concerns he remains adamant that he doesn't need a mate, afraid to take the risk of letting anyone close enough to try to hurt his family again. That is until he realizes that his true mate has been right under his nose for years, and that now through his inaction he may lose him.

Patterns of Intention

Author: drunktuesdays

Summary: Derek looked like the stuff of his deepest fantasies. His shirt was rumpled where Stiles had his hands in it, and he was breathing hard as well, chest heaving. His eyes—his eyes were glazed over and he looked stunned, like he’d been—like Stiles had—“No,” Stiles said, blood draining from his face. The word was croaky and felt like it had to be wrenched out of his chest. “God, no.”

Its Gotta Be A Teenage Love Story

Author: Niallerandhazzagirl89

Summary: Derek Hale is new to school, on his first day Stiles shows him around on his first day of school, they develop a fast friendship but as time goes on stiles finds him falling for his new best friend. Will the feelings be mutual?

Golden Boy

Author: trilliath

Summary: Apparently it still amuses his uncle to buy sex slaves for him, no matter how steadfastly he refuses to use them. Derek ducks into his tent with a resigned sigh, prepared to dress and reassign whatever new beauty Peter has bought him. They do make for loyal servants, so he can't really complain about Peter's 'gifts'. But it is annoying to deal with, to have to spend his evening sorting out a slave instead of being able to go right to bed. It's just something he has to learn to accept as a byproduct of serving alongside his uncle.But when he lays eyes on the boy laying amid his furs, he finds his breath catching in his throat. His skin is golden with the candle-light glimmering against the sheen of oil that has been slathered on his bared body. His lips are parted, and they work over inaudible words or sounds. His skin is flushed, nipples peaked and pierced with simple but unexpected golden rings. He's spectacularly beautiful in the candlelight. The many glowing candles that have been added to his usual lighting cast glittering edges and shadows, imbuing an almost unearthly golden color to his skin.It's enough that Derek hesitates.

Owned

Author: KattsEyeDemon, seekeronthepath

Summary: Derek raised his eyebrows as the man stumbled into the tent. Definitely not broken. “Kneel,” he ordered.

Lap Magnet

Author: Prairie_Grass

Summary: Wherein an ill-advised floral arrangement leads to a whole new definition of obliviousness, accidental mate-bonds, and far more sex and tropes than one fic really needs.orFive times Derek and Stiles didn’t notice how close they were (literally) and then a whole bunch of times when they did...

TOSKA

Author: DarkInsanity (Stereklenidus)

Summary: “Toska - noun /ˈtō-skə/ - Russian word roughly translated as sadness, melancholia, lugubriousness.At its deepest and most painful, it is a sensation of great spiritual anguish, often without any specific cause. At less morbid levels it is a dull ache of the soul, a longing with nothing to long for, a sick pining, a vague restlessness, mental throes, yearning. In particular cases it may be the desire for somebody or something specific, nostalgia, love-sickness.This is what Stiles feels when he wakes up with Amnesia in a resistant camp. There are no zombies like we read in books or watch in movies. But A brute who calls himself the True Alpha and his followers have taken over Beacon Hills Dome usurping the mighty Demon Wolf.

Heathens

Author: haleinskibro

Summary: He began to drift off, eyes drooping down farther and staying closed for longer each time. He was almost asleep when he started to hear a noise, a voice saying something to faint for him to decipher. But, slowly, the voice got louder, more defined, words coming through clearer to his ears.“Wake up. It is time. Wake up.”He turned, his body trying to move up and forward toward the voice while his eyes stayed closed..“Wake up. You are safe, it is time. Wake up.”He turned again. The wolf beside him began to whine, butting its head into his hip. His eyes were moving quickly under his lids. He was straining to get up, to see something and move. He can’t.He’s on the verge of giving up despite the urgent yelling of the voice and the wet nose pressing into his hip when he hears a different voice, stronger and more powerful than the one before.“Szczęsny. Wake up.” And he did.

The Music (Howls) of the Night

Author: tumtatumtum

Summary: The Phantom of the Opera AU where Omega!Stiles plays Christine to Alpha!Derek's Phantom. Except in this version, people hit high notes for completely different reasons.

Into Something New

Author: marguerite_26

Summary: Something is happening to Stiles. He’s losing time. Something is messing with his head, with his body. Maybe if he felt better he’d think to be worried.

Worth Your Weight in Gold

Author: mourninghope (orphan_account)

Summary: Sheriff Stilinski gives his omega son Stiles to wolf Derek Hale in exchange for a sizeable dowry just after the teen's first heat.

Dangerous Liasons

Author: eeyore9990

Summary: “Stiles is in heat! Did you hear me?” Scott practically screamed, but it was too late. Somewhere in the panicked rush of Scott’s warning, Stiles had gotten to the door, yanking it open and then just standing there, letting the doorway frame him to maximum effect.

Stupid Derek Series

Author: the_diggler

Part 1: Stupid Derek

Summary: Stiles should’ve known better. Stupid werewolves with their stupid werewolf hearing. He should’ve known better than to moan Derek’s name, no matter how quietly. But stupid Derek, with his stupid face, and beard, and abs… And okay, Stiles should’ve known better than to leave his bedroom window open while getting off. Because yeah, stupid Derek with his stupid lurking ways...

Part 2: Stupid Scott

Summary: “Did he what now?” Stiles stops in his tracks. “Is that even a thing werewolves do?” “Well… sometimes?” Scott fidgets, unable to meet his eyes.“Sometimes,” Stiles echoes.“When there are… feelings… involved?” “Feelings,” Stiles echoes again, his gut sinking. “Why doesn’t anyone tell me these things?” he tries not to shriek.“It’s kind of private,” Scott shrugs. “And besides, I’m telling you now!” he adds as an afterthought. Stiles rolls his eyes and huffs, stalking off to class. Stupid Scott.

The Demands of Duty

Author: Reiya_Wakayama

Summary: With the threat of war hanging over them, Stiles and his people are caught in the middle and must chose a side before they get smashed between both and with the threat of winter and a bad harvest weighing them down, he must chose quickly.

Under a Pitch Black Sky

Author: vampireisthenewblack

Summary: Stiles is standing naked in the middle of the woods on a new moon because the pack needs to forge a union between werewolf and human.

Here Be Dragons

Author: Coragyps

Summary: Once a generation, the beast in the forest demands the sacrifice of a virgin … but not to eat.Stiles just woke up chained to a rock.

The Kings's Pet Series

Author: TheGirlWithNoIQ

Part 1: The King’s Pet

Summary: It was all over the news; Derek Hale will be the new king, and will soon pick a Pet. When Stiles Stilinski hears the announcement he can only believe that the young Hale will leave him alone, and that soon the horrible encounter years earlier won't keep him up at night anymore.Oh, how wrong he took...

Part 2: The Pet’s King

Summary: Derek's POV of the happenings of 'The King's Pet'.

Blood Moon Run

Author: soowrites

Summary: Stiles wasn't really sure why everyone insisted that he participate in the Blood Moon Run.Or the one where Stiles doesn't want to run but has to, and it ends up being a very good thing.

Fire Beneath My Skin

Author: happyevraftr

Summary: Omegaverse of sorts. Stiles is a rare find- one of the few Omega males left in the world. It’s never been a problem before, but now there’s werewolves around and he’s about to go into Heat. Chaos ensues when Derek shows up at his window unexpected.

Fighting and Fucking On The Full Moon

Author: myriadofnothing

Summary: Derek finds something interesting on the annual hunt for fresh mates.

Summer Contest

Author: kits_lightning

Summary: The moment Derek stepped into the fighting ring and faced Stiles he remembered why he was doing all of this.The omega gawked at him and barely paid attention to the other competitors Talia was mentioning and Derek smiled at the thought of having all of his attention. Stiles blushed from the tips of his ears to his neck and began to run his fingers through his hair while looking away.Derek began to wonder how far down that blush traveled when he shook his head and tried to focus on the imminent battle. He caught the last of what his mother was saying. “—have a good fight and good luck.” More clapping and the horn that signaled the beginning of the fight sounded.

Silver Bullet

Author: nothing_left_sacred

Summary: Stiles hadn’t meant for it to become a thing. He’d just been interested in helping out his fellow man. He certainly hadn't meant for anyone to find out about it.Or the one where Stiles makes amateur porn, and of course, a certain alpha finds out about it.

more fics: part 9

[kaedekisaragi]

Kaede Kisaragi Watches Marvel's Agents of SHIELD S4E13 - BOOM

CSI: Strategic Homeland Intervention Enforcement Logistics Division

Spain. Coulson drinks by himself, speaking sadly of wrong choices and paths he's taken. How he needs to patient. Mack's with him on the comm, so at least he's not gone insane yet. They are stalking a woman who could lead them to May. A woman with australian accent.

Meanwhile, Radcliffe marvels on Aida's ability at simulation building, given she's built an entire damn copy of the planet earth, for the purposes of providing no 'edges' for May to bump into, since the earth is round. And May is trapped still, 'happy'. They walk off to the main room, where Anton is looking over the darkhold's cover, and watchdogs guy (I'll still memorize his name before he dies, promise) tells Aida to leave, calling her a 'thing'. Anton claims their place is undetectable, for he lived here for years. And Anton makes Radcliffe lose his shit when he says HE READ THE BOOK WHILE RADCLIFFE WAS ASLEEP, seeking a solution to eliminate the inhuman problem. As Radcliffe snatches the book, anton says the book told him that the answer to the inhuman problem lies in Radcliffe. Radcliffe reveals he has a way to get an inhuman to use as bait for SHIELD: he stole some terrigen crystals from Hive last season.

Fitz... suffers through adjusting the scanner at the base, for it's firing off at every metallic hanger as if it was an LMD. Can't have that, coulson's got a prosthetic hand, for god sakes. Simmons, meanwhile, was running some tests on Mace and discovered the super soldier serum he's been taking is potentially lethal. The more he takes it, the higher the risk of him dying at the next injection. Mace isn't happy to hear, for ever since they found about the serum he's been doing daily conditioning AND training, so finding out you cannot become Captain America doesn't please him. They NEED him, even more now May is out. He already dropped down from director position, now he can't just be benched. Which is a shame, because Fitz just brought in a new version of the Patriot suit with inbuilt injectors of serum.

Mace walks into his office, to find Daisy totally rocking the administrative role as she relocates Assets worldwide. She's doing it PRECISELY because the enemies will try to target the inhumans. And she leaves Mace to deal with the bureaucracy of doing so without informing the UN about the new hiding spots of Inhumans, which are supposed to be given under the Sokovian accords. Coulson calls in from his 'fishing', revealing Radcliffe based off Aida on a real person, a woman named Agnes Kitsworth. Mace admits to Coulson how he feels he needs to do more. Coulson sympathizes, mentioning he recalls how it was that feeling that he had when he began work with the Avengers. His advice? Play the role you need to play, do your best to protect the team... or get an asgardian spear through the chest (best avoid that part).

Coulson approaches Agnes and confronts her on her work with Radcliffe. Agnes shows nothing but disgust for the man, but when shown the images of Aida, her face is one of shock: Radcliffe did it.

Watchdogs guy enters Nadeer's office as she readies to policy-up SHIELD's actions, and she's not pleased with him there. She openly defies him, saying they can discuss anything in front of her staff. Turns out the rest of the baddies have been reconsidering Nadeer's position in their plans... Namely, upon the possibility that Nadeer is also an inhuman in the makings since she's her brother's sister. She denies it, insisting she's not alien filth, but he has a point that maybe the gene skips a generation... or not. Whatever carries the gene is part of the 'plague'. So as she gets antagonistic, he says the Superior will have her play a role... And smashes a terrigen crystal inside the room.

Only it is him who ends up in a cocoon, and Nadeer is unharmed. She sneers at him, calling him a disgusting... AND THEN THE ROOM EXPLODES.

At SHIELD, Daisy is quick to assume this is another of Nadeer's setups to attack SHIELD. But the news quickly report four dead, one confirmed ID... Nadeer.

Daisy "Well, we can't be too sad. She did try to kill you."

Mace isn't happy regardless, for they now have no way of bringing her to justice. But they can do the right thing. Time for SHIELD to show the world what they stand for.

Coulson and Mack continue to talk to Agnes, who claims she was 'the only thing radcliffe couldn't fix'. Because how they felt to each other wasn't important: dealing with his failures, that's what's important. He left her. Ran from her. Because she has Glioblastoma multiforme. Or Brain Cancer. Placed in an inoperable part of her head. And she's come to Spain precisely so she doesn't have to listen to people like Mack tell her they're sorry. She says she will not help them find Radcliffe, and she is not scared of them, for she lives facing death every day.

At the capitol, Mace dodges the reporters, and listens to the FBI investigator tell him it was a bad idea showing up with their logos. Daisy tells him to go 'solve this' while they solve the mystery. Mace has been demoted to team mascot, apparently.

Mack disagrees with Coulson's desire to force Agnes to help them, thinking they'd be just disturbing her few days left of peace, especially since there's no guarantee may is still alive. Coulson won't hear it, saying he won't give up on her, like she wouldn't give up on him, and tells Mack he can leave.

No traces of bombs in the capitol, so naturally, they'll need to test everything for everything. Daisy finds the footage of Shockley (SERIOUSLY?!? THE GUY WITH A CATTLEPROD IS CALLED SHOCKLEY??? LMAO WHY NOT THE SHOCKMASTER?!? THE SHOCKER?!?), the watchdogs guy, entering the room. Simmons imagines they may have used the darkhold to make a new untraceable bomb. Daisy will run recon in all cameras around the world for Shockley's face, since he is not one of the corpses. And we find Shockley, barefoot, wandering by himself. He goes to a hideout, and anton angrily confronts him for the explosion. Shockley lies, saying Nadeer turned into a cocoon and exploded, not him. Anton isn't trusting him easy, but relents when Shockley acknowledges him as his superior. Anton says he's leaving the country, and Shockley vows he'll take down SHIELD with him when they come for him.

Daisy's shock team arrives, and she quakes Shockley. Coulson meanwhile apologizes to Agnes and tells her about May, telling her everything radcliffe did. She finds it difficult to believe, because Radcliffe as she knew was all about enhancing, healing, prolonging life. Coulson compares Agnes to May for extra effort on convincing her. She agrees.

Quake interviews Shockley, tied up to his cronies. He refuses to talk to her, insisting in knowing if Mace is on the plane. Seeing how she's not getting good results, she casually quakes him into headbutting his friend (which was funny). Radcliffe, reading the darkhold, gets annoyed by a buzzing sound... But Aida shows it's a private message from a post-humanist group... He can't believe it. He imagines it to be fate. He needs to leave, and insists Aida must finish 'the Framework'. She calls out his evasiveness, and he explains that, to avoid the uncanny valley (TROPES!), he based her off Agnes. She seems very disturbed to learn that she is not unique, radcliffe saying it was just good science to base her on someone... real.

At the lab, Fitz-simmons arrive too late to the same conclusion that Shockley is the exploding inhuman. AND MACE IS ABOUT TO TALK TO SHOCKLEY! Shockley tenses up as he tries to explode himself, Quake sending him flying, and Mace and Fitz both tackle the guy. They lock him into the inhuman cage, and simmons drops it off the plane... It explodes, but misses the plane. Jemma hugs fitz and calls him out for risking himself needlessly. But shockley, in the ground, reforms from his dust. And he appears to steal some schmuck's car. Mace is livid, insisting he messed up, that this is why he needs to have powers. Fitz-simmons reveal that there was a high-pitch frequency inside shockley's cell vibration. Basically, he vibrates so hard the energy inside him explodes. Their only way to counter him the next time? Daisy will need to counter his vibing, like she did with the tremors in LA.

Agnes is on comms with mack/coulson, sitting in waiting for Radcliffe. A waiter brings her a cellphone. She tells Radcliffe she is done with his crap, if she can't have closure, she'll leave. But Radcliffe insists he's done it, he can save her. He gives her instructions to come to him, and coulson/mack follow closely from the surveillance.

Shockley arrives at a diner. He borrows the phone. He calls anton, and confesses to being an inhuman, and insists he's still willing to do his duty for humanity. And then he promises he'll bring SHIELD to anton... AND THEN HE BLOWS UP THE DINER. Meanwhile, Daisy is failing to contain the explosions in test-scale. But it's time now, SHIELD found Shockley and are going after him.

Agnes continues to vent her frustrations with Radcliffe. Radcliffe shows his insane cred by claiming he didn't need to cure her tumor, but to cure death. Radcliffe shows before her, claiming he's created The Framework: A world where death is obsolete. Oh great, he created the Matrix. He insists this is all he wanted for her, a life of happiness. And he has May as proof she CAN thrive in this new world.

So Agnes drops her comm and flees with him, Coulson and Mack failing to reach them in time.

Quake confronts Shockley. Realizing she still has no plan to contain him, Quake gets a better idea while talking to simmons: exhausting Shockley. She quakes him until he explodes... He reforms. He gets quaked again. And again. Everytime exploding. The russians are coming for SHIELD though, leaving Mace and fitz-simmons by themselves. Quake isn't handling well the excessive quaking either. Mace tells fitz-simmons to go, while he finally finds his place in this team: blocking. He injects himself with his new suit. The convoy rushes to Mace, who rushes after them. He stops the truck with his own hands, being surrounded. Anton confronts him, telling his men to 'leave the animals to kill each other', for they have the Inhuman Director. They cattleprod him into submission. Daisy blows up Shockley again, and Fitz-simmons suck him up with their contraption, trapping him.

Radcliffe is finishing up with Agnes, Aida helping. He promises soon she'll never suffer again. They begin uploading her mind into the framework. Mack comforts coulson, who says he understands why Agnes chose what she chose. She saw a chance, as slim as it was. But Coulson got a positive: he heard the talk about May in the framework, so he knows she lives.

Stinger. Agnes hangs up the painting she wanted to hang with Radcliffe in her old days. Aida coldly tells Radcliffe there's nothing they can do to actually sustain Agnes' life. Radcliffe kisses Agnes' hand, as she flatlines. Radcliffe says it is not important, because she'll live forever in the framework. All bodies give up. Aida stares into Agnes's face... And removes the necklace containing Agnes' ring, putting it on herself.

Classic karmic irony. Shockley was both a terrorist and a racist. Of course he had to become both a suicide bomber AND an inhuman one at that. Nadeer dying without getting a real comeuppance was somewhat disheartening. After every battle she won with words alone, it would have been so much nicer to see someone defeat her through words. Though I guess she did 'buy it' when she broke her civil facade to insult Shockley. It does, however, now leave the loose thread of her brother's corpse in the ocean. What will happen to him?

An overall theme this episode seems to be 'letting go'. Mace couldn't let go of his lack of power and his feeling of inadequacy, and although he did his part and kept the team from being caught by Anton, he also gave anton exactly what he needed. Then again, Coulson would likely do the same. Coulson himself couldn't let go of May, not after being awakened to the feelings he didn't know he have, and not without being 100% sure she was dead. Mack's position in trying to help him let go speaks from a personal position, since he still doesn't wish to let go of what could've been with Hope, demonstrating how letting go isn't always simple or 'better'. But Agnes is the one who takes the cake... For no matter how much she harbored hate for Radcliffe, for his inability to deal with her illness, she couldn't let go of the part of her that hoped to build a future with him. All of his demented ravings about protecting life now make much more sense given his failure in saving her. And now, thanks to the darkhold, he's gone so completely off the rails he thinks uploading minds to a virtual world is the same as immortality, even if their living bodies die. Apparently he assumes perpetual energy generators are a thing to keep the framework running forever. Otherwise, you simply 'shut down' the framework and boom, millions dead.

Aida's continued growth is shown here as she clearly despises learning that she's not 'unique' and merely a replacement goldfish for Radcliffe. Perhaps she may even wonder whether her subservience is product of Radcliffe's skewed priorities making him assume Agnes wasn't agreeable to his work when she left him and sought to 'fix' that. The scene where she picks up the ring kind of implies she may be trying not to take her place... Which Radcliffe likely won't react well to.

Maybe agnes's flatlining might even be related to this...

It did seem all too unclear why she'd just drop dead like that...

Nothing in the episode implies she was really DAYS near her death...

Hmmm...