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#but they're only fooling themselves
knickknacksandallthat · 11 months
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HAPPY HALLOWEEN
i hope you and kevin (i wonder if he ever goes trick or treating with jean and jeremy) have a wonderful day
HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO YOU TOO, anon!!! I hope your treats were tasty and your night was both spooky and satisfying 😉
Hmm, as for Kerejean, this is what I picture:
Kevin and Jean both view the holiday as pointless and inane. Neither believes (for the most part) in apparitions or otherworldly specters, nor did they ever celebrate such frivolity in the Nest. So the holiday seems both ridiculous and over-commercialized to them. Kevin is confused about the extreme obsession with costumes, Jean finds the over-the-top amount of black and orange decor distasteful, and both abhor the amount of candy given out and consumed.
But Jeremy.
Jeremy, in my head, is the Heidi Klum of the AFTG universe. He's inviting everyone he knows over for a Boo Bash. He's organizing the entire neighborhood to do an adult trick or treat, with mini bottles of alcohol and edibles and flavored lube packets exchanged. He's got dry ice fog seeping out of his frankenpunch. His entire place has been transformed into a haunted house with sound effects and all. His candy buffet's color scheme is Trojan-themed. His Halloween outfits range from slutty to scary to disgusting and he wears glitter and fishnets and fake blood and fairy wings and vampire teeth and monster fur and zombie-peeling skin equally. He LIVES for this holiday.
And his boyfriends...well. Who are they to deny him?
They follow his strict Halloween movie schedule for each day of the month that they can barely squeeze in with their schedules, but somehow still manage to each year. Kevin holds perfectly still as Jeremy paints fake blood on his face next to the vampire teeth he got him, and thinks at least the drinks will be good. Jean dips apples into candy, chocolate, and toffee at Jeremy's direction and thinks at least this costume allows me to see that gorgeous strip of skin on his lower back.
But most of all, they watch him flit around the party, welcoming an insane number of guests in, turning up his Halloween playlist to a decibel loud enough to shake the rafters, bobbing for "poisoned" apples, and shoving frankly unhealthy amounts of candy into his face and think...
...at least he's happy.
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priapussdick · 4 months
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me with my fake boyfriend when i like a completely different person:
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mementoasts · 8 months
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i've drawn more fake plushies (they are fake) (not real) (please don't be mad at me 🥺)
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archersgoon · 26 days
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the international consensus that isaboe must be besotted with finnikin is so funny. they do not like that man
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marypsue · 8 months
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One of my favourite things in writing is to take a character who takes themselves very, very seriously, and then just have the narrative and the other characters around them constantly highlight how ridiculous that is.
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howthesleeplesswander · 10 months
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@magnifiico liked this post for a starter!
((these two are so excited to get at each other asfdjlsd our hearts could never have been ready T~T))
"Mi rey?" Amaya's voice, soft as it was, still echoed in the king's cavernous office, joined by the muted thud of the ornate door as she closed it behind her. Immediately, her gaze found Magnifico ever-poised at his work station across the room; and immediately, the stern expression she'd worn on her way up the stairs softened with affection. A sigh fluttered down to her shoes: mostly fond, but with a whisper of exasperation in its final notes.
"I understand why you have such...rigorous qualifications for your apprentice," she began as she crossed the room, "but it really creates quite a spectacle when the candidates you've rejected are seen fleeing the castle in tears."
Admittedly, the childishly dramatic crocodile-tears of the young lady whom Amaya had just escorted off the castle grounds were proof of being an ill fit for the position. Still, a delicate grimace sullied the curve of the queen's lips by the time she stood beside her king.
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"What happened this time?" she asked, gently expectant.
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I still very loathe the Media Trope of ‘’cold genius man doesn’t feel emotions and never has relationships... UNTIL.. one random relatively bland Preddy Woman comes along and warps his entire personality and ability to think, his heart has grown and his seeming asexuality has evaporated, he is now Normal :)” or whatever like... AS a walking generic hermit archetype myself.. we would NOT act like that .... just let people be detached weirdos in peace, you cowards .. OR, don’t bother to write one in the first place if you find us too boring to exist realistically in our natural state lol.. pathetic 
#the only exception to this is its okay if he develops some pesudo-romantic psychologial fixation on one of his long suffering male sidekicks#or assistants or whatever (since this character acrhetype ALWAYS has some sort of like Straight Man Every Man helper to follow#him around and be an audience stand in. sometimes multiple like a whole team of assistants. sometimes just one etc.)#like a strange not-entirely-romance-but-mutualy-unhealthy-comedic-codependence w someone you worked w 25+ yrs COULD be in character. sure.#ASIDE from that one exception though..... just keep them aromantic and asexual.. why would someone who has been that way for their#entire fucking life suddenly be like ''well I've known this woman three weeks but she's really hot! whoops!''#''guess I'm going to act completely out of character! sometimes booba so booby it fundametally alters the dna of me personality. you know ho#w it is'' .. like shut up.. explode#It's not that I project personally onto these characters (writers are bad at writing them and they're generally annoying as shit) BUT just#like... coming FROM the perspective OF a cold detached ''robot'' seeming hermit freak.. like textbook scholar wizard man locked#away in a tower somewhere type personality... You just watch shows sometimes and you can SEE that the writers are trying to write#the Character Archetype that is your actual realworld personality and you're just like 'we do NOT fucking act like that!!!' lol#you know ? like .. i don't actually care about the characters themselves but more just.. the principle of the thing. staying true to what#has been set up. You can't be like ''oh yeah this is your typical cold detached hermit weirdo with zero interest in human relationships for#the most part blah blah blah'' and then 5 minutes later be like ''WAIT GUYS!! LOOK! they're still NORMAL! look they love booba#too!!! haha hashtag Relatable!!'' .. what have you done to him.. you've massacred the archtype.. cowardly fool#Also I'm referencing them as male because this character archtetype is usually male but the same thing can apply for other gendered versions#of the archetype. it's ALWAYS annoying. no matter what it is lol. GOD AND IT'S even worse when they're supposed to be like hundreds or thous#ands of years old like.. some sort of supernatural being who's ''above it all'' because they've seen the world's cycles for so long#and blah blah and then it's like ''omg.. suddenly into romance.. for some reason all 900 years of my life nobody has ever been good#enough but YOU.. random ass person who I met 30 minutes ago and are completely average in every way or maybe you have like one#special power or are smart or something but apparently somehow I've lived 900 years without ever meeting a single other smart person#or whatever but WOW.. you... instant soulamtes.. I am no longer aromantic and asexual. I am also no longer smart.''#at least if it's a human with a normal lifespan you can be like 'well they were only 30. maybe they genuinely did just have their first#sexul awakening' or something but.. you're telling me like.. 900 years??? 1000 years?? and NOW they're like 'whooa!!' lol#Which obviously all aroace people are different.. all people with autism or schizoid pd or any other mental illnesses that can sometimes#lend people towards that type of 'weird hermit' archetype are all different. plenty of these people WILL have relationships and sex and desi#re those things. but it's like.. if you are OBVIOUSLY  setting out to write that one VERY specific archetype within the broader archetype#then GO ALL THE WAY!! you cant have someone be like HALF-detached partial-hemrit sometimes-maybe-genuis or whatever#or I guess you can but like. it should be that way from the beginning. it's the random sudden shift in personality thats jarring
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frommybookbook · 2 years
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Sure, kids, these are perfectly normal ways for a boss and secretary to look at each other.
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wolf-skins · 1 year
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nvm the americans in the notes going “i live in america you don’t want privatized healthcare” are normies and fine it’s the fucking americans going LISTEN HERE YOU FUCKS
americans stop pretending you’re the main characters in the story and eat my entire ass
#i want to have empathy for the story they gave but to start off like a total wanker talking down to us like ontarians haven#t been freaking out about this and talking about it over and over for years now is disgusting#we don't need you to increase the fucking font size and yell at us like we're children we fucking know we don't want goddamn privatized#healthcare jesus christ i hate looking at cdnpoli online bc americans never stop making it about them as if they're the only one#who have ever suffered from bad policy or some shit and the rest of us are dumb fools needing to be told by y'all#i Know. we all personally fucking know bc there's plenty of instances like the story in the notes having already happened here#this bill would just be another last push. he's already done so much damage and if you cared you would know exactly what and how#GOD i hate this but it's so frustrating to see americans make it about themselves as if i don't have enough trouble#every single fucking day talking to canadians about this shit. bc so many normie libs are obsessed with looking at america okay just#stop it. if we can shut up and support y'all during your political struggles by god you can try to do it for us#anyways i guess the vote offered doesn't even mean anything but idk why i thought there would be#there's actually no stopping it unless somehow ford got booted in the next day but that's not a thing#it's just capitalism lol. and fascism. bc he's already violated the charter and there's already brutality and capitalism demands more and#more. violating federal law some more to make sure the rich can devour our corpses some more is just inevitable
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wernerherzogs · 1 year
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I cant put my finger on why exactly maybe its just my anxiety. Some of the ways they were acting and the decisions people make that I know is gonna be bad are rough to watch sometimes. The writing and acting is great so i wanna keep going just kinda want to know how far they are gonna go w how bad these people are. Its funnier than I thought tho
it's VERY funny a lot of the time, but at its core it's a greek or shakespearan tragedy with Very Bad characters as protagonists/modern royalty (royalty coming from new money and speaking foul contemporary language). they get Worse with every season, i think, anon 😔
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meirimerens · 2 years
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U saw this right? https://www.tumblr.com/phantomspiders/707930399950700544
i hadn't and now i have... feeling some kind of things...
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kuruttameanscrazed · 6 months
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kurutta may try to get all your sympathy about how she's so dirt poor and starving and spent all of her money on her poor doggo so please donate, but...wait? she does receive help from her family and still manages to go to anime conventions and buy the favorite character goods she loves.
oh, what's that, kurutta? you say poor people like yourself are allowed to have nice things, all that after you've mocked and accused others you used to know of wanting to bait sympathy and play up their poverty to grift and take others' money?
wow, kurutta! so funny how you can only give yourself all that rationale and grace, when you're not judging and blaming others. amazing, kurutta, truly!!
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choccorin · 1 month
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thinking about megumi being absolutely in love with you. yuuji and nobara are sick of him, everytime they hang out, he'll always mention your name or anything about you whenever he has the chance. they're playing dress to impress? you love playing that game with him. they're watching a horror movie? you love horror movies, especially the conjuring series.
they were hanging out in nobara's room when they noticed that megumi was eerily quiet. usually he'd join in whatever they were doing but he hasn't spoken a single word yet, which made them worried. after arguing silently with nobara, yuuji takes the initiative and asks the black-haired boy why he was all gloomy.
megumi looks at them with sad eyes and lets out a tired sigh, making the two worried. you didn't break with him, did you?! the two think to themselves. after a minute of silence, he finally responds, explaining that you haven't replied to his text in 20 minutes now. nobara stares at him judgingly, and yuuji tries to keep in his laughter while also comforting his sad friend.
among the laughter that filled the room, a loud ping! was heard from megumi's phone making the boy frantically check the notification. his face lights up when he sees that it's from you. nobara teases him by calling him a “lovesick fool” but, he pays no mind, only paying attention to you. he became his usual stoic and aloof self after that. they honestly wish that you were here too, so that you could see the effect you have on megumi.
bonus: the picture nobara sent you of megumi being gloomy became your wallpaper and he absolutely hates it, tries to take your phone to delete the picture but fails everytime.
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haven't written in days, might rewrite this if i have time idk
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ozzgin · 19 days
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Yandere! Circus
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I've been wanting to draw some of my dolls for the longest time and this turned out to be my most detailed artwork so far :') And since I really love the circus, I thought I could turn this into an interactive story, too. Let me know what you think! Based on classic stock characters from Italian theatre, Commedia dell'arte. Content: gender neutral reader, horror, dark comedy, human and monster romance
You're finally here! Come on in, don't be afraid. Where is everyone else, you ask? Why, you're our only special guest, Darling (Y/N). This is all for you. Come, do not upset the Ringmaster. We will show you everything.
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A night carnival? You've never heard of such a thing. Nonetheless, curiosity got the better of you when you found the trampled poster on your way back home. The actual message almost escaped your attention; you'd been too focused on the thick, ornate border, and the colorful, swirling patterns intricately filling the page.
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"Last night in town! 'Wizard of Ozz' Night Circus, a mesmerizing show that will keep you glued to your seat. We're still searching for our Columbina. Perhaps you could become part of our story?"
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Might as well check it out. Which is why you're currently here, in the outskirts, trying to find a walkable path among the weeds. It's dark and you can barely see anything in front of you. They're not trying very hard to provide an inviting atmosphere, you think to yourself.
Eventually, you discern a glimmer of light in the distance. You have found the circus tents.
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The campsite is quiet and still, causing you to hesitate in your decision. Is it truly open?
There's a faint murmur coming from the main entrance. A small, melancholic Pierrot - when did he show up? - awaits by the heavy curtain, pale hands stretched out.
"Your ticket, Columbina", he announces with decorum. "Me and Arlecchino will show you any tent you want to visit. We are here to entertain you."
He ponders for a moment, before adding:
"I'm sure you'll like him more. He's a very alluring fellow. Me, on the other hand...Oh, forget it", he mumbles through pouting lips, ushering you inside.
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"Aha! There's the star of our night! Our Columbina!"
A tall man in a pompous, glittery costume bounces towards you and lowers himself with a theatrical bow, giving your fingers a quick kiss. You pull your hand away, visibly bothered by the odd gesture.
"You keep calling me that. I'm (Y/N)", you argue.
"Yes, yes, of course we know that. Do ya take us for fools?" the Harlequin asks, kicking one foot in the air. The jingle of the bells at the tip of his shoe echoes across the hall. "You have, however - you must understand, yes? - you've entered Ringmaster's Circus. From now on, you are the Columbina to our play."
You raise your eyebrows in disbelief.
"Just like that? Why me, and not someone else?" you scan the surroundings, pursing your lips. "Where are the others?"
"Others?"
Harlequin makes an exaggeratedly shocked face and tilts his head towards Pierrot.
"What are they saying? You're the only one here, Columbina darling. After tonight, we-"
Pierrot's hand lands firmly on his friend's lips.
"You always talk too much. Always, always! And yet, you're the favorite. Of course you are. Oh, what pity, what misfortune", the pale young man laments. "We're wasting precious time."
They both burst into a little dance; a rather silly one, you think with an amused smile. Then, they place themselves besides the entrance, each one standing at one end, back straight and chins raised.
"Go on, go ahead, Columbina darling. This is your carnival. Choose any tent you'd like."
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Pulcinella's Tent
The stage is pitch black, save for one spotlight contouring a patch of ground. You can see a large, colorful ball, and two feet clumsily rolling their way atop of it.
You chuckle at the sight. This must be the clown.
"No one can compete with Pulcinella's juggling", Pierrot declares somewhat monotonously. "His acrobatic spectacle has left many guests speechless, acting with such dexterity that one must wonder: is this truly the work of two hands?"
Lights flicker, allowing you to catch glimpses of smaller balls being thrown around. Juggling so many balls while bouncing around is indeed impressive.
"Rest assured, this is the art of one single man. Although four eyes are better than two."
The shadows are abruptly swallowed by spotlights, and you squint your eyes, adjusting to the brightness. A two-headed man continues his performance, throwing you the occasional cheeky smile.
"Ah, that is..." you place a hand over your mouth.
"A bother, truly", the Pierrot remarks, sitting next to you. "They're complete opposites."
He observes as both Pulcinella's heads tilt in your direction, visibly entranced. He sighs deeply:
"You'll love them either way. They're funny and entertaining, unlike me...A pathetic miser. Oh, if only I had half their charm!" he bemoans with a soft sob.
"Hey! Don't sadden my beloved like that", Pulcinella barks, jumping off the ball and running towards your seating with a comically merry jingle to accompany him.
You cannot help but marvel at the man in front of you.
"Enough of this, I've had enough! You don't get to decide yet, Pulcinella", Pierrot exclaims in sudden panic. He claws your wrist tightly and pulls you after him. "It's time to see other tents."
Sandrone's Tent
You peek behind the heavy curtain and freeze. Are your eyes deceiving you? Someone is idly resting at the bottom of a large aquarium, showing no struggle despite being underwater. The mysterious man senses your presence and emerges to the surface.
"Would you look at that! I can't remember the last time I had a visitor."
He gestures for you to come closer.
"Are you the new guest? Our Columbina?"
"I don't know what you're talking about", you speak up with hesitation, eyes glued to the scaly tail that seems eerily genuine. "I think I'll be leaving now."
"Leaving? Didn't the Ringmaster already tell you?" The merman claps his hands, amused. "You're naïve, I like that a lot. Perhaps this time I'll be the one to have you."
He abruptly grabs your wrist, and you jolt at the feeling. His hands are ice-cold and moist.
"Let me have a look at you, won't you? I'll help you hide from the others if you're good and listen to me."
You feel a pair of hands sinking into your shoulders, and you're ripped away from the merman. Harlequin's voice rumbles deeply across the room.
"You're being a fox again, aren't you, Sandrone? Hands off our guest! You don't get to pick yet", he scolds in a low growl. "Ringmaster won't be happy about it."
"Go on then, tell on me! Ringmaster's good boy, eh?" the dark-skinned man smirks mockingly and slams his tail against the glass. "Put a collar on that one, Columbina. See how well he barks", he snarls, then slides back underwater and promptly vanishes.
Harlequin's grip on your shoulders becomes tighter for a brief moment. You can tell he's tense.
"Let's get you out of here. Don't listen to a word he says, Columbina darling. He lies, you see? No one trusts him. You should rely on me."
Pantalone's Tent
You gawk at the impressive height of this tent, head nearly spinning from tilting yourself all the way back. Ah, this must be the trapeze artist. Indeed, one of the two handles is dangling above you, and it occurs to you there's no safety net. A tall, lean man swiftly pounces across, reaching for the trapeze. His movements are slow, yet calculated, and you can't help but wonder if he might actually be flying instead.
Upon closer inspection, it appears he has no arms.
"Madness", you find yourself shouting. "Stop this nonsense!"
He gracefully wraps his legs around the bar, swinging back and forth with a confident smile.
"You doubt me, Pantalone himself?"
With another thrust, he lets himself go, spiraling down against your terrified protests. His heeled shoes clack against the hard tile. Lastly, he stretches out his bandaged stumps, as if signaling his successful landing.
You find yourself bowing to the grand gesture.
"Yes, yes, it's rather impressive, isn't it?" Pierrot follows behind you in his usual dull tone. "Pantalone is our master acrobat."
He lifts his gaze and notices that the man didn't bother waiting for a full introduction; he's already standing before you with a flirty grin.
"...and a charmer, I suppose. What, you're already doing your tricks?"
The sallow clown squeezes himself behind you two protectively.
"Shoo, shoo! Columbina is merely visiting."
He lightly pushes you away, towards the exit. You throw one final glance at the mysterious individual; he waves with his residual limb, and winks.
"You know where to find me, love."
Il Capitano's Tent
You feel a radiant heat coming from this tent. In the middle of the ring stands a grand cage. An animal of sorts? You keep your distance, observing from the benches.
A monstrous giant stumbles within your view with heavy steps. A thick, scaly tail rattles the bars of the cage, swinging itself with the precision of a bullwhip.
"Il Capitano himself!" the Harelquin announces theatrically, bending his arms in the direction of the blue beast. "The strongman, the fire-spitting artist, a most devilish creature captured and chained by our Ringmaster."
"Is this one mine?" the monstrous man pins you down with a predatory gaze.
"Perhaps", Harlequin spits out bitterly. "They decide, not you."
You squirm in your seat, suddenly much smaller under his intense stare. The charismatic guide's smile falters for a brief second, replaced by an envious grimace.
Il Capitano inhales deeply, expanding his torso and contracting his muscles. His fanged mouth then unhinges, releasing a great flame which spreads all the way to you. You're almost tempted to reach towards it, feeling the sting with your very fingers.
"Amazing", you mumble, still mesmerized by the spectacle.
This was no cheap trickery. Capitano is truly a one-of-a-kind artist. No human could replicate such a feat.
The beastly creature holds onto the bars of his cage, shoving his snout outside and grinning. Puffs of smoke escape between his teeth.
"Come down here and I can do even more, little one."
Harlequin gasps and gestures for you to stand up.
"Outrageous! How dare you-!"
He urges you to follow him outside. Enough monstrous sights for now.
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"Shall we head towards the other tents, darling?"
Harlequin walks ahead, deep in contemplation. Pierrot scurries after him, whispering the remaining choices. Your shoulders are heavy, and you're quite tired from the eventful night.
You notice a little opening between the lavish curtain folds and decide to sneak away. They needn't know about your departure. You stumble around dark halls, following the cool breeze of the outside, until you're met with the starry sky.
Your path is blocked by two large poles, so you step to the right. Your body freezes in terror when they move with you. Slowly, you raise your head and follow the black shapes, and realize they're legs.
Far, far above ground, towering over the entire circus, you see two glowing eyes.
It's the Ringmaster.
"Bad, bad Columbina", he reproaches.
The voice is off, like an old, broken record reverberating against your eardrums. A cold shiver runs across your spine.
"I'm sorry", you blurt out in fear.
A long, bony hand appears before you, twitching with a loud pop. You wrap your hands around a finger, desperate to not anger this unholy creation.
"Let's take you to your caravan. We're leaving tomorrow."
Oh, God. What have you done?
Now, now, don't fret. There's nothing to be afraid of. Come, put that frown aside. Everyone loves you here. After all, you're their most precious Columbina. What's a Circus without its treasure?
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specshroom · 9 months
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•The Queen of Curses•
Part 1 / Part 2
(Ok So think of this as like a Sukuna wins and everyone dies AU lol. True form! Sukuna. Added the cursed blood bath for no reason. Suggestive, titty stuff but that's it, MDNI, She/her reader, no use of Y/N)
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Sukuna didn't rein over the Heian Era alone. It was always him and his lover, burning and slaughtering together. Their love for eachother was well known across the land. People knew not to be fooled by her less intimidating looks (in comparison to her husband) for she was just as brutal and heartless as he. 
All that changed when sorcerers from the era used all they're combined might to seal the Curse Queen inside a small cursed object, formed only from the combined sacrificed corpses of their comrades. 
They knew that the only way to defeat the King and Queen was to separate them and they succeeded. After hearing of the fate of his lover Sukuna flew into a blind rage leading to his own defeat at the hands of the same sorcerers.
One thousand years of relative peace passed with the two lovers separated but still yearning for each other. 
Luckily for the lovers, the ever devoted Uraume never stopped looking for a way to set their masters free. After centuries of searching and begrudgingly accepting a little help from Kenjaku, they finally found the cursed object that their Queen had been trapped in, a simple orb a little bigger than a tennis ball. It made Uraume's stomach turn thinking of such a powerful force being shoved into such a small thing. They carried the black orb with them everywhere while continuing the plot to releasing Sukuna. They found themselves whispering to it, compelled by the obsidian globe. They didn't know if their master could hear but they felt like it was right, like they could almost sense their masters overwhelming aura, compelling them to spill out everything they know. So Uraume spoke to it quite a lot, telling the dark orb and the beast inside about Sukuna's fate, about the new world, about Kenjaku and the plan to free her and her lover. 
The plan that finally comes to fruition. Sukuna is freed, his true form is restored in all its glory and hes wreaked havoc on most of Shibuya just as a warm up.  Uraume kneels before him.
"Master Sukuna."
 They say bowing their head.
 "Hmm?" 
Sukuna hums an acknowledgement, eyeing them with contempt. 
Uraume brings the dark crystal like ball out of their loose robes and holds it up, presenting it to their king. "Now, with your power fully restored we can release the Queen from her containment."
Sukuna stares at the ball in the sorcerers hand and gestures for Uraume to give it to him. He holds it as gently as his colossal hand is able to. It seems to get hotter in his hand, so hot it would surely sear the skin of a mortal. He pears into the orb only seeing his reflection in it, the Curse king nods to Uraume. He places it on the ground and they both step back, arms reaching out towards the orb on the ground.
In unison they both let out powerful blasts of cursed energy aiming right at the cursed seal. Strong streams of power, one white hot and the other pearcing cold, the orb starts to crack emitting a glowing white light. "It's breaking! Don't stop!" Sukuna orders and Uraume grunts but dutifully follows orders. The cracks grow wider and the light shines brighter before it's too blinding and they both cover their eyes as a powerful blast pierces the air.
In the settling dust stands a figure that's all too familiar to the both of them. They both watch as the figure shifts, leaning back and stretching their arms above their head, releasing a groan that is appropriate for someone who hasn't been able to move much in a thousand years. When the woman finally turns to Sukuna she sighs and smiles, letting out a relieved huff. Sukuna grins triumphantly and opens all four of his arms expecting a tide of thankful affection from his lover. When she takes the first few steps towards him her smile starts to waver until it's down to a grimace. Sukuna tenses as her eyes darken. He opens his mouth to ask what's the matter as she walks up to him and-
*SLAP*
Silence envelops the already desolate atmosphere. Sukuna's head is turned to the side, his eyes wide. He blinks before glaring at the offender with a look that could kill. She stares up at him with eyes just as deadly. 
"HOW COULD YOU LEAVE ME IN THAT FUCKING BALL FOR SO LONG!!?"
Sukuna stares with his mouth open for a second genuinely shocked into silence until that second is over and he responds with equal vitriol. 
" HUH?! THAT WAS YOUR OWN FAULT WOMEN! DONT BE UNGRATEFUL!" 
The two fiery curses glare at each other with such violent intent, the very air around them heats up. 
"WHAT KIND OF SHITTY HUSBAND ALLOWS HIS OWN WIFE TO GET SEALED!"
"YOU CAN'T BLAME ME FOR THAT! DIDN'T I JUST SET YOU FREE?"
"DONT TAKE ALL THE CREDIT YOU BASTARD! URAUME'S THE ONE WHO-" 
As if the women just remembered that the other sorcerer exists, she turns around and there her loyal subject is, kneeling in her presence. 
" Welcome back master, it's good to see you" 
The woman's face brightens up immediately, "Uraume~" She sings running up to the sorcerer and lifting them into a bone crushing hug that would've killed a lesser being. "Oh, Thank you Uraume. My dutiful subject, you did so good." The Curse Queen coos at the sorcerer, squishing their face into her chest and stroking their duel coloured hair. Uraume doesn't hug back as to be respectful of their superior but they don't push back either, just letting their master man-handle (woman-handle?) them. 
Sukuna clicks his tongue at the show of affection and crosses two of his massive arms over his chest. No doubt in disbelief that HIS wife doesn't embrace HIM first after a thousand years spent apart.
The wife in question turns to him with Uraume still in her arms, an irritated look on her face. 
"What's your problem?" 
"My problem is that MY wife is being an ungrateful bitch." 
The benevolent woman stills and Uraume peers up at her from their place, nestled into the cleavage of her loose fitting kimono. The woman sets Uraume down onto the ground gently. She breathes a heavy sigh and in less that a second she's on Sukuna throwing a mass of red hot cursed energy right into his face. He blocks it in time and is able to keep blocking her continuous fast attacks. She gets frustrated and lets out a powerful blast that shakes the earth and forces him to jump back to avoid the blast.
She laughs with relief, finally being able to let out all that pent up cursed energy feels amazing. Her tattoos (similar to Sukuna's but not quite the same) almost seem to glow with the immense energy output being let off from her body. Only the tattoos on her face, neck and wrists are visible but Sukuna knows very well what the rest looks like, having traced every inch of ink with his fingers.
Sukuna takes the opportunity while she's distracted by the pure euphoria of letting her energy loose and comes barreling towards her, she can't react before he tackles her to the ground. He pins her hands down with two of his hands and another goes to roughly grab her jaw.
"Does it feel good to finally let off some steam, Baby?" 
The king of curses teasingly remarks from above her.
"Baby? That's new." She questions with a teasing grin. Her words are a bit slurred from the way her husband is holding her jaw.
"Might as well get with the times." He bites back with an even more cocksure grin. She scratches and kicks at him and bites at his hand. With all her concentration she channels the sheer amount of pent up cursed energy in her body and lets it burst out in a deafening blast that knocks Sukuna off of her. Static reverberates in the air.
In the few seconds it takes for him to recover she takes the opportunity to pounce on him pinning him to the ground. Grinning from her place above him her heavy breaths and beating heart match his. Her crazy, alert eyes meet four others with the same sentiment.
"I missed you so fucking much." Sukuna says before he pulls her by her robes into a deep kiss. The kiss is somehow aggressive and sensual.
Two of Sukuna's massive hands go to her waist and thigh holding her body to his as he sits up. The third hand is on the floor for balance and the last is tangled in her hair pressing her further into the kiss, as if that's even possible. Both Cursed beings are glad that they don't need to breath or else they surely would have suffocated each other by now. 
The queen of curses has never been more pleased by the fact that her husband doesn't seem to know what a shirt is. Sukuna has voiced many times that he wished his wife shared the same sentiments only for her to scoff at the suggestion, although, now she thinks the idea is one of the best he's ever had.
They fight for dominance with their tongues. Still locked in the passionate sloppy kiss the woman unlatches her hands from his hair to slip off the robes she was wearing over a loose fitting kimono. She unwraps the black accented white Kimono, rather slowly in sukunas opinion to let her breasts fall free to the warm air. 
Sukuna releases his mouth from hers, licking his spit slicked lips to stare down at his beautiful wife's beautiful tits.
"Yeah, remember these are mine. Only mine." Sukuna grumbles lowly before smooshing his face right between them, sighing deeply like a thousand year old itch has finally been scratched.
"Aww, is Ryō a little jealous?" The woman preens in a patronising manner while lightly stroking his fluffy hair.
"Poor baby~" She coos, repeating the pet name he used for her. Her teasing only gets a glare and a growl from the beast of a man currently buried in her tits, holding her impossibly closer to his face.
She chuckles down at him, a loving yet menacing look in her eyes.
"Well maybe I should let Uraume- where did they go?"
She looks around the scorched city landscape looking for her white haired subordinate and as if they heard her words summoning them they appear with a respectful bow.
"I have made the preparations for your bath."
"Thank you, Uraume~"
The woman beams and turns to the man who is still occupied with her tits, he's now picked a tit to suckle on, fondling the other in his rough hand.
"come now Ryo, it's time for our bath." She says curtly and the man groans with his mouth full, absolutely dreading even the idea of his tongue leaving the hardened nipple he's been sucking on. If the two objects poking her ass are any indication if it was up to him they would never get to the blood bath Uraume so kindly set up for them.
She tries standing up and pulling away but the man is latched on tightly, all four arms clutching around her as if they never want to be an inch apart from her again. The more she struggles the bigger the two chubs in his pants grow. She sighs and struggles once more.
"Uraume planned this out very nicely for us, Ryomen. Just do what I say Damnit!"
She pulls at his hair and he bites down on her tit in response, earning a yelp and a harsh smack on the head from her. He laughs, not with the mouth on her tit but with the mouth on his stomach. She peers down at it, as if she just remembered it's there. Without wasting more time she grabs the large tongue crushing it with her grip and tugging on it hard.
Sukuna releases her tit to yell out in pain.
"OW, WOMAN! You should be grateful for every ounce of attention I give you! OW!"
As Sukuna rages, she snorts and jumps out of his now loosened arms. Turning her back to him, she approaches the other sorcerer who's head is still bowed.
"Uraume, would you kindly show me to my bath?"
"Of course, Master"
Uraume stands and bows their head. Holding out their arm for their Queen.
She holds onto Uraume's arm, purposely squishing her still exposed breasts into the sorcerer's side as she smiles down at them.
"I guess we'll have the bath all to ourselves then, Uraume~"
Uraume closes their eyes with a knowing smile and nods in response, very accustomed to the games the two lovers would play with each other, often forcing them right in the middle. Their Queen would often promise that she'd one day make Uraume flustered, something that to this day has yet to occur.
The sorcerer doesn't even flinch at their powerful master fawning over them, stroking their arm and pressing her now marked up tits closer into them as the two walk off towards the bath Uraume prepared.
"HEY!! WHAT THE HELL!?? URAUME!"
Sukuna sits in disbelief at his wife's antics. As if he's only now remembering what a tease she is and has always been.
His wife looks back at him over her shoulder, she shrugs her kimono off her shoulder, exposing her tattooed shoulder to him before turning back to Uraume snickering.
Sukuna huffs and grins, shaking his head. He's so fucking happy to have his wife back.
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(AN: I was originally planning to make this smut but... It just got away from me😭😭 sooo... Maybe in a part two? 👀👀)
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shadow4-1 · 5 months
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I'm just imagining having to break up small fights between the 141.
They're rare, but they do happen. Usually when tensions are running high and things aren't going as they're supposed to. Occasionally it's because they cross each other's boundaries, but for the most part it's just men being men.
Soap and Ghost squabble the most, but it always comes from a place of concern. It's usually just hushed growls, and face to face glares. You usually just clear your throat and raise a brow. Both men tend to huff and walk off. Sometimes, if they're really mad at each other, they'll push at each other. You know better than to get in between them, but you call out to them and they stop. They never hurt each other, and that's pretty nice, actually.
Gaz and Soap on the otherhand, get much more physical. It's not bare-handed hits, but more wrestling, headlocks and grappling. It's like watching two brothers get into it over the TV remote (you've seen them fight over a PS5 controller, so not far off). All you have to do is raise your voice, grab whatever their fighting over, or just sit and enjoy the show. Eventually they tire themselves out. If they're actually mad at each other it can turn into a fistfight, but they usually look to you to break it up before it gets to that point.
Price and Soap is the worst. It's extremely rare, but when their tensions boil over, it explodes. Soap has some authority issues, and if Price forgets/ignores that it tends to get heated. It starts off as grumbles and growls from Soap but quickly turns into yelling and disobeying orders (obviously Soap has his reasons, but he goes about it the wrong way). If Price has had enough of Soap's infantile behavior he tends to snap (any of you acting like fools makes him embarrassed). If words are exchanged, well, it'll turn into a fight. Price always wins. Soap takes a couple days to recover his ego. But you try to jump in before it can get there. Only once have you actually had to get in between them and it was kind of terrifying. The only reason they stopped yelling at each other was because you had a hand on each of their chests and talked in a slow, calming fashion.
They'd all be fine without you, they'd figure out their differences. But with you around, they lean on you. Something about the way you guide social interactions just helps them breathe easier. You make an excellent mediator.
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