#can't wait to see my best friend and crawl into bed next to them and fall asleep together and stay at their house and feel safe all day

[mattsturnioloz]

Then I lost you: Pt 4.

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3.

Summary: Matt's career as a youtuber takes a toll on his 4 year relationship with his girlfriend, putting it on hold. Will it ever be the same again?

Warnings: angst, unresolved angst, crying, talk about intercourse, make out, fluff!!

Pairings: Y/n x Matt Sturniolo

A/N: (Felt like writing chapter 4 cause I need to know what happens😭 also I recommend listening to the song while reading🙂)

“You know deep down it’s for the best y/n.” Matt says to me, gently taking my hands in his, a few tears rolling down his cheeks. I feel a deep pang in my heart but I wipe my tears. I nod, hugging him. We share a long heartfelt hug, and it only gets tighter each second.

“I love you.” I silently cry. “I love you more baby..” Matt says, softly hugging me closer, his arms around my torso. This very same night we cuddle eachother close, not knowing if it’s gonna be the last time.

———- ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ ———-

The next morning I wake up still cuddled up with Matt, my heart heavy. It’s soon, but I know I should house hunt right now. Because if I don’t leave soon, I don’t think I ever will. I sit up taking myself out of matt’s arms gently, not wanting to wake up, but he stirs awake anyway and yanks me down pulling me closer. It hurts so bad but this feels so good.

I spend the next week house hunting, not finding anything that feels like home yet. No where is home if Matt isn’t with me. Matt is my home.

Matt and I still act like a couple, because we know this won’t be for much longer, and it felt like how it used to be, when we first got together. Innocent and sweet. It hurts to know we’re letting this go. I feel like we just gave up on what we have too soon. I don’t want to let it all go.

Matt comes with me to check out a house and when we walk in, we instantly feel like this is the one for me. It was small and cozy, which I love since it’s only gonna be me. Only me.

I sign the papers and buy the house, with a smile on my face, but it fades once I remember the circumstances. My things are still at my old Matt’s place, already all packed up.

We walk into Matt’s room which once was mine too, after loading all my boxes of belongings into the u-haul. It feels empty and I take a look at his face and all I see is dread and tears rolling down his cheeks.

“Matt..” I almost whisper. I grab his hand pulling him closer to bring him into a hug, and he breaks into sobs. I’ve never heard matt cry, not like this. Tears roll down my cheeks as we hug again.

“P-please- Please don’t go yet.. i just want- need one more night with you..please-” He chokes out, stuttering and sobbing. “Okay.. I would love that..” I say softly, sniffing while cupping his face, lifting it so that I can look at him with a smile and I kiss his salty teary lips.

It was time for bed and I decide to shower. I go to the bathroom and I get undressed before getting in and letting the water run over my body. I hear the bathroom door open and I open the curtain, finding Matt undressing himself to join me.

Before I could even say anything he opens the curtain wider and gets in, kissing me sweetly and softly. We shower together while showering eachother with love.

When we finish, Matt turns the shower faucet off then helps me out the shower. Once we’re out he dries my hair and naked body with the towel before doing the same to himself.

We brush our teeth, still just in towels and when we finish Matt gently grabs my chin, turning my head to face him and he kisses me. It gets deeper by the second but no faster. It was lust-filled but in the sweetest way.

He lifts me up by my thighs gripping them and takes me to the room, closing the door and gently putting me on the bed before crawling on top of me and slowly removing the towel, kissing me passionately once again. He makes his way to my neck slowly, taking his time, being gentle.

We make slow but sweet passionate love all night, and tears were shed during it, but after we cuddled eachother close and held on tight because now we knew for sure that this was our last night together. We fall asleep in eachother’s arms, not ready to let go.

———- ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ ———-

Matt’s Pov:

I wake up in the morning with y/n’s arms and legs tied around me and it hits me that this is our last day together, which also happens to mark our 5 year anniversary..

I want to take back what I said. What I said about us not working. I regret it. But I know it’s too late and the damage is already done.

I don’t know what i’m gonna do without her. She’s my light, and I can’t believe I’m this stupid enough to be letting someone like her go. I love her and I can’t imagine my life without her.

She was supposed to be my wife. The mother of my children. The one who I was supposed to grow old with. The one who I would be telling stories with to our kids about how we met and fell in love. I messed it up, and now I can’t take it back, but i’ve hurt her enough.

I feel y/n start to stir awake and I brush her hair out of her face, looking down at her with a loose genuine smile. “Good morning baby..” I say leaning down towards her face to give her a sweet kiss on the tip of her nose then on the corner of her lips.

“Good morning..” She smiles with grogginess in her eyes. Her smile pulling at my heartstrings. “Happy 5 year anniversary, my love.” I say kissing her lips this time. Her smile fades and her face is in a frown. Her eyes well up which makes mine too. “I know.. I know..” I hold her close as we cry together as I occasionally kiss her forehead. I wipe her tears before kissing her forehead one last time and we get up and get dressed up for the day.

We make breakfast while messing around and laughing together, and I couldn’t help but hang onto our love that’s still here and after breakfast I feel so much affection towards her.

“Hey, why don’t I take you out for dinner tonight?” I ask her pulling her closer by the waist. “Why not?” She agrees with a big smile on her face. I lean down to peck her lips softly. “Perfect, i’ll take you home so that you can get ready then i’ll be back to pick you up” I say enthusiastically. She nods and leans up, standing up on her tip toes to give me a kiss.

I grab my keys and I lead her to the car to take her home. We get in and on the drive there we listen to music and talk about whatever we felt like talking about.

Once we get there, she grabs her purse from between her legs and she give me a kiss. “See you later..” She says with a small but sweet smile. “See you later baby..” I say, giving her a warm smile. She walks off to her front door and she opens it, going inside and shutting the door behind her, I start the car and I drive back home. I was determined to make this the best last date. Just for her.

1,250 words.

A/N: (thought this was gonna be the last part but I got exhausted and didn’t wanna wait to post it so part 5 is coming out tomorrow and is gonna be the last part!! I got so emotional making this part omgggg, writing angst is not for the weakkkk😭)

Taglist: @watercolorskyy @starzinasblog @imwetforyourmom @urfavstromboli @sturniqloo @star-yawnznn @h3arts4harry

[crisisevil]

it's crawling inside the couch cushions saturday

[woso-dreamzzz]

Tattoos IV

Mapi León x Ingrid Engen x Child!Reader

Summary: You design Mami a tattoo

You sit crosslegged in front of Mr Pina's enclosure, drawing furiously on your notepad. It's a new piece for your best friend Pequeñita and you want to make it perfect.

Mr Pina helps with your inspiration sometimes so you sit with him as you draw.

"Hola, teeny."

Mami comes up behind you and pulls you into her lap. She looks over your shoulder to see what you're drawing and she smiles.

"That looks great!"

"Mumma says when I'm done we can frame it before giving it to Pequeñita!" You say," So I'm working very hard!"

"I'm sure Pequeñita is going to love it," Mami says," But, hey, can I have some help with something?"

You look away from your paper to look at Mami, humming your confirmation.

"I was thinking about getting another tattoo," She says," And I want it to be extra special."

You nod along. "Mumma says tattoos are permanent and you must be very careful what you put on your body."

"Your Mumma is very smart," Mami says," That's exactly right."

"What are you getting?"

"Well," Mami says, moving you so you're facing her," I was thinking my favourite little artist could design me one."

"Really?!"

"Really!"

You think for a moment. "After Pequeñita's drawing is done. We have a playdate next week and it has to be finished by then."

"Alright, teeny. I can wait."

Mapi finds that she doesn't have to wait long because you come running into the bedroom very early a few days later with your sketchpad and pen covering your hands.

"Oh, teeny," Ingrid laughs as she pulls you up onto the bed," You've gotten very messy."

"I made Mami's tattoo!" You say, crawling over Ingrid to settle between them," It's Bagheera!"

It's a black blob, in truth but it's got a tail and little cat ears and it's outlined with a dash of gold because Bagheera is one of the queens of the house and she makes you extra happy-happy.

She makes Mami happy too.

You explain it all to her and Mami smiles.

"Thank you, teeny," She says, giving lots of kisses all over your face," This is perfect."

"Did you hear, Mumma? Mami called my drawing perfect!"

"Of course she did!" Ingrid pulls you into a big hug," Our favourite artist never produces anything that isn't perfect."

You giggle as Mumma layers kisses on your cheek.

"We'll take a trip to the tattoo parlour later," Mumma says," And you can see Mami get her new tattoo."

"Of course! I can't have it done without my favourite artist being there to see!"

Mapi can't stop smiling at her new tattoo as she goes into training the day after it's finished. It looks absolutely perfect on her arm and the smile never falls.

You run off pretty quickly to go and see Alexia's Pequeñita with your little backpack of art supplies and Mapi watches you from afar.

"That one's new," Alexia says, pointing at the Bagheera blob.

"Teeny designed it," Mapi boasts," I got it done a few days ago."

You've gotten out your skin pens again, drawing over your arms as Pequeñita attempts a portrait of you.

"Is it meant to be Bagheera?"

"It is! She's so talented!"

Alexia laughs. "She's coming back to mine tonight, right?"

Mapi nods. "She's got a picture for Pequeñita in the car. She worked on it all weekend."

"Pequeñita's got one at home for her as well."

"Mami!" You call, running over to her," Look! I'm you!"

You show off your pen covered arms, pointing out which ones are crude depictions of Mapi's own tattoos. You point at you shoulder and beam, showing off your own Bagheera blob.

"Tia Ale! Do you see? Me and Mami match!"

"Very nice, teeny," Alexia laughs," I was just saying how cool Mapi's new tattoo is. You'll have to design me one soon."

You nod seriously. "Soon," You promise," But not now because me and Pequeñita are drawing each other now."

"Okay, teeny," She says," Are you excited to come over tonight?"

You nod. "Pequeñita says she got new paints and we can paint together!"

"You can only paint with Pequeñita," Ingrid says as she approaches," If you have clean hands and arms. It's nice that you want to match with your Mami but you also need to be clean, teeny. Come on, let's go and wash it off so you can draw some more."

You sigh. "But Mumma-"

"You can be like Mami later," Mumma promises you," But right now, I need clean arms or I can't put these on."

She waves a packet of temporary tattoos in your face and you gasp.

"I'll wash my arms!"

You take off for the toilets.

"Take someone with you!"

You grab Pequeñita's hand.

"An adult, teeny!"

You grab Pina's hand too, dragging her and Pequeñita with you.

"Where did you get those?" Mapi laughs.

"Corner store," Ingrid replies," I used to love these things. She can't get ink poisoning from these. It's the safe solution if she wants to be like you."

"But she won't be like me if we don't match!" Mapi complains and Alexia grins.

"I think there's a site where you can design your own."

Ingrid groans as Mapi's eyes light up.

[sweetbans29]

Teach Me: The Art of You (THE END) - PB

Pairing: Paige Bueckers x Reader

Previous Part

Summary: You and Paige have been best friends for the last 6 years. You trust her completely. And it is because of that trust that you ask her a rather forward question. AKA - You ask Paige to teach you.

Warnings: mature, like mature - mature

Word Count: 3.2k

Sweetbans Masterlist & Teach Me Masterlist

AN: Here we go...for the last time 🫠

Paige's lips met yours for what feels like the first time in forever. The kiss starts off gentle - her hands cupping your face as your hands rest on her chest. You can taste the saltiness of both of your tears mixed in with her lips.

You pull away, resting your forehead on hers.

"Can we go to bed?" You ask.

"Of course," Paige says and helps you up from the couch. The two of you make your way to her room. You crawl in her bed and open your arms to her. She looks down at you with the biggest smile and finds her place in your arms.

"Never wanna sleep without you again," Paige whispers into you.

"You never have to, B," you say and kiss the top of your head.

Over the next few weeks, life goes back to normal - well mostly normal except for the fact that you and Paige have actually started dating. No more having to restrict touches or steel glances. Paige was free to show the world she has been and will always be completely in love with you.

The regular season is coming to a close as the team prepares for March Madness. You alongside the other coaches are spending a lot more time reviewing film and watching other teams. Paige isn't a fan of how much time you are spending in the office but can't be mad that you, without fail, come home to her.

The team decides to go out for one last hurrah before they lock in and decide to do it at their favorite bar. Everyone is over at your apartment getting ready for your fun night out. You are in your room finishing getting ready as Paige is lying on your bed and scrolling through her phone. When she sees you are almost done she gets up.

"Mmmm ready?" She asks as she comes behind you snaking her arms around your waist. Her head finds its place on your shoulder as she looks at you through the mirror.

"Yep!" You say. "It's been so long since I've been out, long overdue."

Paige would be lying if she said she hadn't been thinking about you. Ever since the two of you officially got together the lessons had stopped. She didn't mind the fact that they stopped but each day kept getting progressively harder for her to keep her hands off of you.

"S'not the only thing overdue," Paige says as she moves your hair to one side of your neck and begins to leave a trail of kisses down the other.

You sigh, leaning back into her and letting her grace your skin with her lips. She holds you firm against her front as she makes a meal out of your neck. One of your hands rests on top of hers while the other comes up and holds her head in place on your neck.

"No marks," you moan as she sucks on your sweet spot.

"Gonna show them your mine," she breathes out sucking a little harder, her teeth grazing your skin.

You try to move away from her but she isn't having any of that.

"B, no marks," you say again. "I'll show them whose I am another way, trust."

She kisses down to your shoulder. "And how do you plan on doing that?" Paige asks.

"Well, you will just have to wait and find out," you say, your eyes struggling to stay open. "But won't have to if I'm all marked up."

Paige immediately removes her lips from your skin and you want to whine but know you are the one who stopped your girl in the first place. You look at her through your mirror and take in how beautiful she is. Your eyes trace every feature of her face.

Paige feels your gave and her cheeks begin to brighten.

"Why are you staring at me like that, ma?" She asks and hides behind you. You found it to be incredibly cute when she would get nervous around you even after knowing you for years.

"Can't you just let me admire my girlfriend," you say and turn around to face her. She no longer has a place to hide. Your eyes burn into her skin. "Stunning."

"Yo, you two ready or what?" You hear one of the girls yell and you respond.

"Ready, B?" You ask.

"Could just stay here," she says. You laugh.

"Ya right, come on B," you say grabbing her hand and leading her out of your room.

The team heads to the bar. Once you are through the door Paige grabs drinks for the two of you. When she comes back you down half of it in the first sip.

"Woo, slow down there. It's not going anywhere," Paige says, grabbing the glass from your hand.

"Hey!" You say, your hand reaching for the glass she just stole from you.

"Let the girl have some fun," Azzi says. "She has been working her ass off for us."

Paige looks betrayed that Azzi chose your side over hers. Azzi grabs the drink from Paige's hand and gives it back to you.

"Woooow, I see who the favorite it," Paige says.

"I have always been Azzi's favorite," you say and lean over to the curly-haired girl and away from Paige.

"As long as I am your favorite, we won't have any issues," Paige says grabbing your hand and intertwining her fingers with yours.

"Well..." both you and Azzi say at the same time. The look on Paige's face practically has you and Azzi laughing on the floor.

You pull Paige into a hug, moving your head to whisper perfectly in her ear.

"Don't worry, B - you know you're my favorite. Always have been, always will be," you say as you bring your tongue to the shell of her ear. A move you have learned riles her up faster than most.

Paige jerks away knowing it is way too soon to be leading you out of the bar. She wants to enjoy hanging out with the team before taking you home. She gives you a warning look and you just smile up at her and take another sip of your drink, a smaller sip than the first one.

You both spend time with the team, enjoying each other's company. You are three drinks in when you start dancing with some of the girls. All of which are letting loose and having a good time. Moving your body to the music, you raise your arms and sway your hips. It doesn't take you long to find your girl leaning against the bar watching you dance. You smile at her and make your way over.

"Dance with me B," you say grabbing her hand. She puts her finished drink on the bar and follows you to the middle of the dance floor.

You face her and wrap your arms around her neck, connecting your bodies and moving to the rhythm of the music. Her hands rest on your hips as she looks down at where your bodies connect.

You turn around, making sure her hands stay planted on your hips. Your arms go up in the air again as you begin to grind on her. You hear her let out the lightest gasp as you bend over. When you come up again, you move her hands to rest on your boobs. She gives them a squeeze before running her hands down your stomach, bringing your shirt slightly higher than it already is. Your hips never stoping.

One of your hands comes to cup the back of her head, guiding it to yours as you turn your face to the side meeting your lips together. The kiss is sloppy and rushed, filled with lingering hints of alcohol from your drinks. You turn to face her cup her cheek.

Your tongues fight for dominance, Paige desperate to win.

Before she can, you break the kiss and begin down her neck like she had done in your room. You pay attention to all right places causing the blonde to throw her head back. Your free hand toying with the string at her waistband.

"Take me home," you whisper in her ear.

Before you know it you are being pulled out of the bar. Paige storms past the team, your hand firmly in hers as she makes a beeline to the door.

"Where are you two going?" Evina yells.

"Evina, just enjoy your drink. We all know where they are going," Azzi says sipping her drink.

Paige has you back at your apartment in no time. The second the door shuts she has you pushed up against it. Before her lips connect with yours, you put a hand on her chest.

"What?" She asks until she sees your next move.

You push her back, taking your shoes off in the process, and have her walking backwards all the way to the couch. You push her to sit down as you ever so slowly move on top of her, straddling her.

She watches you in awe as your hands come to her torso, moving your hands up under her shirt. You lean down and plant a kiss on her shoulder.

"Imma need a little more than that, ma," she says, her breath already rigid. Paige has never been a fan of slow - all the hookups she has had have been quick and straight to the point. But as she was teaching you, she slowed down to match your speed. Now though, now she feels like she has made a mistake as she is eager to get to the finish.

"What's the rush babe?" You ask. "Plan on taking my time, still new to this ya know."

You bring your lips to kiss all along her collarbone. She leans her head back against the couch and lets you work. Your hands move to cup her breasts under her shirt and she removes it for you.

Your lips find their way to one of her nipples, swirling your tongue around it and sucking it lightly. Removing your lips from her skin, you cup both of them and kneed them.

"I love these," you say as you continue to massage your girls chest.

"All yours, ma," Paige's voice husky as she struggles to get the words out. You smile.

You kiss down her stomach, peppering kisses over the waistband of her pants. You hook your fingers in her waistband and look up at her for approval.

"Fuck ya, ma," she says as she lifts her hips up and you pull her pants down.

She is now watching your every move as your hands rub up and down her thighs and your lips sprinkle little kisses along the inner more sensitive parts of her legs. She spreads them for you as you park yourself on your knees in front of her.

Your trail of kisses makes its way to the bottom of the last piece of fabric separating you from where she wants you most. You begin to kiss over them, inching closer to her center. When you finally get to the place Paige has been patiently waiting for your lips to meet, she jolts forward.

You look up at her and kiss it again.

"So sensitive baby," you tease her as your hands bring her boxers down. She watches your every move anticipating the next. Never in a million years would she expect you to be the first to please her, she always imagined her pleasing you first. Yet here you are, on your knees just for her.

"May I?" You ask, your eyes trained on her center. Paige doesn't trust her voice and nods vigorously.

"Need to hear you babe," you tease her again. "Can't forget the rules now."

"Fuck the rules," she says and you take that as a green light.

You spread her legs even further apart as your tongue licks a strip of her. The moan she lets out is ungodly. One of her hands is placed on the back of your head while the other shoots its way to cover her mouth. You kiss her bundle of nerves and begin to work.

"Fuck ma, so good. So so good," she mutters as you work on her. One of your hands comes up to massage her left breast. You pick up the speed as moans fall freely from her mouth.

"Just like that, YES, oh fuck," her words coming out in breathy strings. "Close," Paige yells, not able to think of any other words.

You slow your movements to a stop and Paige whines. You look up at her with raised eyebrows as she looks down at you with furrowed ones. She watches you as you bring two of your fingers into your mouth sucking on them. She bites her lip as she watches you - anticipating your next move.

You brush over her sensitive bundle of nerves and her hips jerk forward, begging to be touched again.

You smile as you slowly line your fingers at her entrance. You kiss her thigh as your fingers enter her. Paige moans your name and you watch her in awe. All you want to do is make her feel good.

Your fingers work in her as your begin to suck on her center again. Paige is fisting the couch as she lets out moans left and right.

"Don't stop. Please don't stop," she moans as her back arches off the couch pushing her core closer to you. You work her through her high as she repeatedly says your name.

When she slumps against the couch, you remove your fingers and begin to kiss back up her stomach.

"That was so hot," you say as you kiss her lips.

"You are so hot," she says breathlessly. Her hand coming to cup your face and kissing you again. She tugs at your shirt and you break the kiss, allowing her to remove your shirt.

Paige stands and tells you to jump, which you gladly do, and wrap your legs around her waist. She immediately establishes dominance in the kiss as she walks you to her room. She lays you on the bed and in one swoop has your shorts off. You stare at her with your mouth agape and she just smirks down at you.

Paige crawls over you, causing you to squirm, and comes to kiss you. Your hands come to cup her breasts as she hovers over you. She breaks the kiss and laughs.

"What?" You ask.

She looks down at your hands on her chest and you feel yourself blush, immediately removing them.

"Don't stop," she says shifting her weight to bring your hands back to them. "Touch them, kiss them, suck them as much as you want - I meant it when I said they're all yours."

You smile and bite your lip.

"Never thought you would be a boob girl," she says chuckling, lowering herself to kiss you again. She kisses down your neck leaving all the marks in the world.

"Just yours, you say. "S'cute and little."

"Hey!" Paige jokes but you just pull her back to you. Your hand s come to claw at her back as you stifle moans whenever she finds a particularly sensitive spot.

She kisses down your stomach and grabs the waistband of your intimates, pulling them down with her teeth. You watch her as intently as she watched you just ten minutes ago.

Her lips meet your inner thighs as she hooks her arms around your legs to spread them and grab your ass.

"I've been dreaming about this forever," she says as kisses closer to your center. "How you would look spread out on my bed." You moan at her words and buck your hips craving any sort of friction.

"How you taste," she says as her tongue finds your center. She then goes to work making you feel good. You are a moaning mess as she is now the one feasting on you.

She slows down, removing her lips from your skin uses her thumb to keep a rhythm.

"Open up for me, ma," she says bringing two of her fingers up to your lips. You obey and welcome them in, swirling your tongue around them.

"Good girl," she says as she removes them, sinking down to where she just previously was. Her fingers begin to work in you as her lips attach to you once again.

"Paige," you moan. "Yes, Paige. PAIGE."

You are releasing in no time. Body twitching as you ride out your high. She removes her fingers from you but Paige doesn't stop. Her tongue keeps working on your overstimulated center. Your hands come to her head as your thighs close around her head.

"Paige!" You scream but she keeps going. She doesn't care if you suffocate her - hearing your moans and tasting you has her on a whole new high she never wants to come down from.

"Paige! Ahhh!" You are now trying to pull her head from you. She is relentless. Before you know it you are on cloud 9 once again.

After your ride your second high you fall back against the bed. Paige finally removes herself and lays next to you.

"Holy shit," you say breathless.

Paige laughs and pulls you into her side.

"Babe, we are just getting started," she says and begins to kiss your shoulder.

Your relationship with Paige grows. The two of you continue your time at UConn and are now known as a couple but will always be best friends first.

The two of you walk side by side into Paige's multiple injuries - you being there every step of her recovery and keeping her sane when she feels like she is going crazy. Encouraging her to work on her mental game and not rush the healing process, knowing she wants to get back on the court as soon as possible. You keep her grounded.

Side by side when she decides to stay at UConn for a fifth year - which Geno gladly accepts and knows you would be staying on the coaching staff. He hires you full-time after you graduate but knows you will be going wherever Paige gets drafted.

Side by side when she carries the team back to the final four and then to the championship. Although if anyone were to ask you, and they did, you would say you played a major part in getting them back to the championship. Ultimately winning it all.

Side by side when Paige goes to the draft and gets drafted to the WNBA - moving to a new city and beginning life outside of Storrs.

Side by side when she asks you to marry her, with your dad's permission of course. Letting you plan the wedding of your dreams which really only included her. She watches as you plan the perfect day for both of you and always makes sure that she is okay with your decisions.

Side by side in life. When you tell people about your story, Paige tells them that the two of you have been together since before high school. She likes to say she knew you were the one for her when you walked into the gym during summer training before freshman year. This always gets you to roll your eyes, knowing she actually didn't like you until the end of freshman year but you let her tell the story her way. And you do, you always let her tell your story her way because it never ceases to amaze you how her eyes light up even brighter each time.

You look at Paige and you know. Know that there is no one else on this earth who is a better fit for you. No one who could ever love you better or be better for you than she. You know when you are side by side with her, you have nothing to fear, nothing to worry about because it's Paige. And to you, Paige is your home.

AN: WE DID IT BAN-FAM! WE DID IT! Let me know how you feel about this whole journey, I would genuinely love to know. And as always, thank you for the love and support 💙

[mbsneur]

You‘re still the best

Cata Coll x Reader

Summary: cata lost against brazil

Warnings: angst

My Masterlist

please read this text before going to the story don't be so strict with me but rather write to me what I can do better or what you wished were different. also tell me if you find the story too long or too short.. Also write to me if you liked it. My requests are always open (and English is not my first language so don't be mad at me) and if you have any ideas for the future about who I should write please tell me… the topics I will choose by myself unless you have a request for one or two people I will Read everything.. in the next survey I will take a few ideas from the old survey and new ones…. now read and I hope you like it <33

(its a very short one)

your girlfriend missed out on the fight for the gold medal because of her mistakes

your heart stops you can't bear to see your girlfriend like this she runs off the field crying and takes all the blame for it

her little heart breaks into a thousand pieces it was her greatest wish to win this gold medal

a ball through her legs

a penalty because of her

an own goal

almost a fight

she didn't want to talk to anyone from her team her pained eyes you see in the stands and her tear-filled eyes meet yours

she looks at you and her look tells you that she is sorry she would apologise to you for everything although she has no compulsion to do so it will take her a huge effort to come into your presence

she runs into the changing rooms and can't bear to look at you again

you go down to the railing and wave laia over to you she also cries and comes over to you in displeasure

"can you please just give cata a big hug and tell her i'll wait outside the hotel please" you say and feel all your blood rush to your head and your eyes glaze over

"of course" tears roll down her cheeks and she tries to give you a little smile

none of the girls will shower there now they will all go to their nearby hotel to be by themselves and shower alone to rinse off all the pain

you take your bag and run to the exit to intercept cata as quickly as possible the way out was a torture everywhere people pushing each other and spanish people arguing with brazillians and a lot off drunk people

you've been waiting for her outside for a long time you stand around fidgeting and see the first spanish women coming out some of them hug you or give you a nice smile

until you see your friend she is still crying she comes running towards you and you try to take her in your arms by touching her shoulder but she pulls away from you

"let's go i have to take a shower" she says, wiping a few tears from her face

she runs ahead and you run tenaciously behind her she must be so hurt that she doesn't even want to give you a hug

you haven't exchanged a word all the way her body looks weak she opens the door to the room and pulls her jersey over her head and throws it in the corner her shoes find their place there too

cata's broken injured body is now on full display for you you slide up to her and place your hands gently on her shoulder blades and give her little kisses on the edges of her sports bras she relaxes into the kiss until she shrugs her shoulders and pushes you away from her

she turns around abruptly your body jerks and startles "can you just stop touching me" she says angrily and almost screaming you cross your arms embarrassed and take a step back she looks at you painfully and without saying anything else she disappears into the bathroom and locks the door behind her

slowly your tears are coming out that have been stuck inside you all evening cata has never been like this to you she has always met you with love

you crawl into bed and your feelings take over your thoughts go crazy and you hear your girlfriend swearing in the bathroom

//

an hour has passed and you mumble to yourself quietly the door of the bathroom opens and cata comes back in an oversized t-shirt and her boxers she is still crying " lo- lo siento amor" she says and tears stream down her cheeks

you sit up slightly and pull the blanket off your legs and nod to her your cheeks are blood red and burning from all your tears cata comes closer and her whole body lies firmly on top of you

you gently stroke her hairline and press her head firmly against your neck "it's okay i understand your pain it's okay" you tell her tearfully and her hands squeeze your body tighter

"i shouldn't have treated you like that i didn't appreciate you you're the only one who can take away my pain " she says and sobs

"it will get better you know how much I love you and that I will never let you fall" you say understandingly

"Will you promise me?" she asks, looking at you slightly

you have never seen cata so vulnerable she was always the strong one of the two of you "i promise you i will fix you and stay your home forever"

cata kisses your neckline lightly "you're still the best" you say with a slight grin

[0nlythrowharrybeaux]

I heard you, i’m sending you a fluffy request! 🤣 #5 maybe with like a y/n on her period and a sweet/fluffy/comforting Harry 🤗

This couldn't have worked out better because I just started my period 🥲 thank you for listening 🫶

Your periods were never particularly easy like some people's were, you had always cramped and bled what felt like way too much on the first couple days, but you were used to it so you managed pretty well. But this time around this was not the case.

You woke up in the middle of the night and were suddenly assaulted with the worst cramps you had ever had in your life. You immediately got out of bed because you knew what would come next. As soon as you stood upright you felt the blood start to trickle out of you so you bolted to the bathroom, thankful that you had caught this before you soiled your bedding. Once you got that taken care of you took a painkiller and laid in bed willing the pill to kick in so that you could get back to sleep.

********

"Rise and shine, love of mine!" Harry burst into your room with so much energy it startled you awake and as you felt him sit beside you, you peeked up at him.

"Hi, what're you doing here?" you asked him groggily.

"We're going to Runyon with Glenne, Jeff, and Cam remember?" he asked you and you frowned.

"Oh...I completely for got." you groaned.

"S'alright, i'm only here this early because you said you didn't want to go if it got too hot."

"I did say that." you recalled and the sighed, "Baby, I'm sorry but I'm gonna flake on your guys, I got my period last night and I've hardly got any sleep from these cramps I've had." you explained and he pouted.

"I'm sorry, petal. I can flake on them too. Stay and look after you?" he offered. Of course you wanted him to stay, but he shouldn't have to bail on his friends.

"You can hike and then come back f'you want? I'm just gonna sleep." you assured him. After all, it was only a quarter to 7 now.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, baby. Go have fun and then come back." you assured him and he smiled at you. He loved how you always wanted him to spend time with his friends, it meant a lot to him that you were mindful of their time too, but you looked miserable right now. He could see the discomfort all over your face and then you winced and curled up for a few seconds before you sat up, "Move!" you said and he stood to give you space and you rushed into your ensuite and closed the door as best as you could before you just started to throw up.

There was nothing in your stomach to throw up, just bile, which was always the worst. But that cramp had hurt so badly it made you nauseous. You groaned before you wiped off your mouth and decided to just freshen up while you were in there. When you came back out with a fresh face and fresh breath Harry glanced up at you from his spot on the bed.

"I cancelled on them, baby. Look at you! I can't leave you like this." he shook his head and you smiled at his kindness, "Want me to make you some tea for your tummy?" he asked and you nodded as you stopped before him and dragged your fingers into his hair. You felt him kiss your sternum and you smiled, "Alright, get back into bed. I'll be back soon." he said and you let him go before crawling back under your covers.

You dozed off until Harry had returned with your tea. You were too lazy to sit up and you were sure it was boiling hot so you'd need to wait anyway so you made no move to get out from under your covers. He set the mug down on your nightstand before stripping off his shirt and going to the other side of the bed. You shivered when he lifted the covers and he smiled.

"You're such a drama queen, s'not that cold." he teased you and you smiled as you felt him come up behind you. He knew that you typically hated him touching anywhere near your stomach when you were on your period, but you needed the warmth now, "Want my hand over your tummy? Look, I'm really warm." he said as he put his hand on your leg.

"Mmhmm." you agreed and he smiled. You repositioned him a bit before relaxing in his hold, "Do you know why it's so bad this time?" he asked and you huffed.

"I'm wondering if it's because we stopped using condoms?" you said and he pouted, "I feel like my body knows and she's punishing me for not getting pregnant." you theorized and he chuckled, "Don't laugh after you asked me why!" you scolded with a chuckle.

"M'not making fun. S'just funny." he assured before kissing your shoulder tenderly, "But you're probably right. I noticed that after we stopped I started to come more." he shared and you giggled, "S'like they're throwing not so subtle hints our way." he chuckled and you did as well.

"Silly bodies..." you said softly and he hummed in agreement. You shifted a bit and he just ended up hugging his arms around you, making sure to have one of his arms against you for warmth. "I love you. Thank you for being so sweet to me." you whispered.

"I love you too, baby. Just want to make you feel looked after, y'always do it for me. S'about time I can return the gesture, y'deserve it." he said softly before kissing your head and letting you rest.

READ MORE PICTURE PROMPT BLURBS HERE

[lostfirefly]

Trembling, crawling across my skin, feeling your cold dead eyes, stealing the life of mine (Ch.1)

This fanfiction story is my present for my friend @yujo-nishimura, whose birthday is today! Sending hugs from Russia and wish you a lot of Crocolove!

Two things inspired me to write this fic: One of my fav songs from which the title is taken and Elena and Damon's dance (from The Vampire Diaries, S1). My 1st attempt to write the story about this character.

Description: Yujo is a young girl whom her father has betrothed to Mr. 3. She and her sister come to the ball, where she meets one of the members of the Cross Guild Corporation Sir Crocodile.

Warnings: No warnings

Words: 1307

Sir Crocodile x OC

The title is taken from "Dance with the Devil" by Breaking Benjamin.

English is not my native language, errors may occur. As always, feel free to share your thoughts :)

Taglist: @gingernut1314

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✎﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

"I can't believe we're going to the castle ball tonight!" A blonde girl with curly hair and brown eyes was bouncing happily on the bed.

"Helena, calm down," another girl with green eyes sitting by the dressing table answered her in a calm voice. She brushed her brown hair, occasionally glancing in the mirror. 

"I'm so impatient. We're going to see your fiancé, Mr. 3 again, Yujo! He's so cute!" Helena jumped off the bed, spinning around the bedroom. Her light white dress in small florals fluttered beautifully in the air. 

"I don't know. He doesn't seem like a bad person. Writes nice letters and courts quite non-trivially.", Yujo put her hairbrush down on the table, slowly stood up and walked over to the closet. "Stop spinning around, Helena. Our parents are expecting us for breakfast."

The day passed in preparation for the trip to the ball. After breakfast, Helena and Yujo strolled around the large summer garden and talked about many things. Helena could hardly contain her excitement for the evening, dreaming that she would be able to meet a wealthy young man at the ball.

"And I also heard that either all the members from Cross Guild Corporation are expected to attend, or at least just one. They're some kind of tycoons. I bet they're all handsome and young."

"I've never heard of them." replied Yujo calmly, gently running her hands along the branches of the trees. 

Finally the evening came and Yujo and Helena walked down the steps of their house down to the front entrance. It was a warm summer evening, and a large white carriage drawn by two red horses was waiting for them at the gate.

"Oh, my God! Ball, ball, ball, ball!" Helena ran up the stairs faster than anyone else. 

"You're incorrigible!" Yujo laughed as she watched her sister hop into the carriage. She lifted the hem of her mauve colored chiffon dress and sat down carefully next to her sister.

"What if Mr. 3 isn't coming alone? What if he brings someone cute?"

"Who? Mr. 2 or 4?" Yujo put her arm around her sister's shoulder. "Our parents are already there. For all I know, our father was going to discuss some kind of deal with Mr. Jinbe. And mom probably wants to gossip with everyone. 

It was already dark when they arrived at the gates of a large castle made of gray stone. 

"Here we are, here we are!" Helena jumped out of the carriage and adjusted the hem of her mint-colored dress. "Yujo, where are you?" 

"Coming!", Yujo stepped out of the carriage and looked at her sister. "Let's hurry up or you're going to die of impatience. Just please behave yourself."

They walked into a huge spacious hall. There were tables covered with white and gold tablecloths all around. A large crystal chandelier adorned the ceiling. The ladies were dressed in their best clothes, and the men were all in suits. 

There were whispers, negotiations, and girlish chuckles coming from various directions. 

"Good evening, Yujo, Helena!" a skinny man with a funny hairstyle in the shape of the number three, walked up to Yujo and kissed her hand. "It's nice to see you here. I brought you both some wine.”

“Thank you so much!” they both said in unison. 

"Say, Mr. 3, is it true that the owners of Cross Guild are expected to come?" Helena giggled and sipped her wine a little at a time.

"I don't know about the others, they seemed to have some pressing business, but one is definitely coming." said Mr. 3, looking around the room. "And why are you inquiring, Ms. Helena?"

"No reason..." Helena blushed. 

"I'll leave you ladies alone for a moment," Mr. 3 bowed and stepped aside.

"I heard there's a swordsman there and he's available, and he's pretty cute," Helena poked Yujo lightly in the shoulder. 

Suddenly all voices were briefly silenced and heavy footsteps were heard.

"Ladies, let me introduce the member of the cross guild, Sir Crocodile." Mr. 3 turned back to the girls. "This is Yujo, my fiancée. And this is her little sister Elena."

A tall man with purple hair and dark eyes stood before them. He had a coat thrown over his shoulders and a hook hand.instead of one arm. Yujo was surprised, but tried not to show it.  

“Nice to meet you,” Crocodile kissed the girls’ hands. “So young and so beautiful.”

Helena turned red as a lobster hearing these words. She lightly rubbed her sister’s hand. 

“You see? You see? The hook!” Helena whispered to her sister. Yujo lightly stepped on her sister's foot, silencing her.

“Excuse me, ladies. I have to speak with one man and I’ll come back to you,” Crocodile said calmly. 

“Woooow! He’s so.. So handsome.” Helena was so amazed by Crocodile that she seemed to forget how to breathe. “There seems to be another one there, but I don’t remember who. He must be somewhat unremarkable, since I don’t remember him. I wish I could see the swordsman. Who’s better, that guy with the hook or the swordsman? What do you think?” 

“I have no idea. Aren’t there other people there or what? In this Cross Guild,” Yujo quietly asked her sister, watching Crocodile out of the corner of her eye.

Helena shrugged. “Don’t know. I’ve heard about these three.”

Yujo's father, a plump man of short stature with gray hair approached her with Mr. 3. They had a long discussion about the upcoming wedding ceremony, the guest list and the menu. Yujo found herself looking for Crocodile with her eyes the whole time. 

Finally the start of the ball was announced and Mr. 3 took Yujo's hand and led her to the center of the room. The girls had to stand in one line, the man in another. Yujo found herself in front of Crocodile. The music started. Everyone stepped towards each other, touching one palm to the palm of their partner's hand. Holding their palms side by side, they moved smoothly in a circle. After making a couple of circles, everyone put their second palm to the partner’s palm.

"Sorry you have to settle for a hook," Crocodile said dryly.

“That’s ok,” Yujo said and smiled. 

After making a couple more circles, everyone came closer to each other. The men put one hand on the girls' waists. Crocodile hugged Yujo with a hook. 

Finally the dance ended and everyone bowed to each other. At the same moment, Helena ran up to Yujo.

“God, the chemistry between you just killed me!”

"What?" Yujo asked. She felt as if her mind was clouded during the dance.

"I'm so jealous of you. I want it too! You should ask your Mr. 3 to introduce me to a swordsman!" Helena was almost jumping next to her sister.

“Will you calm down? We are at the ball after all. What if someone is looking at you now, and you are behaving inappropriately,” Yujo laughed, noticing how her sister pouted. Yujo looked around the hall and saw how Crocodile approached her father. They shook hands and started talking about something.

“Yujo, this is Mr. Magellan. He will marry us,” she was pulled out of her thoughts by Mr. 3, who approached her with a tall man, his face resembling a mandrill, with very sharp teeth and thick beard. 

“I have to admit, your bride is amazing, Mister 3. Can’t wait to perform your ceremony,” Magellan said and kissed Yujo’s hand. 

While the all-important potential guests were discussing the upcoming wedding, Yujo was catching more and more that she was thinking about Sir Crocodile. What was it? A charm after the dance? Or is it something else?

[weministertomonsters]

Werefox (Harcourt) x human female reader ~ part 1

You're twelve when you hear your mother yelling outside.

"Get out!"

You scamper into the backyard to see her shooing the scrawniest werefox you've ever seen away from the chicken coop. He's got egg yolk clinging to his chin. His sunset orange ears are pinned to his head as he deftly dodges your mother's flailing dishcloth and leaps over the fence, disappearing into the brush.

"But Ma!" You wail, "he's cute and hungry!"

"Such creatures are a pestilence. Besides, dear, you can't keep him as a pet. He'll grow just as big as you, and he's no true animal."

You pout for the rest of the week, but she doesn't budge, like any sensible mother. The little werefox had a den nearby, you figure, so you set out to find it, taking two eggs from the coop. His den isn't hard to find. You've seen fox dens before he looks like he hasn't learned how to create a proper and safe den. As you step on the crunchy leaves surrounding his home, his head pops out of his den like a jack-in-the-box and he stares at you.

"Hello," you say, tromping forward without much thought to your safety. "I brought you eggs!"

He cocks his head to the side. You put the eggs on a leaf close to him and watch him snap them up, crunching on the shells and licking his lips.

"Can you speak?" You ask him next.

He watched you silently, ears swiveling. You glimpse a worn, scruffy collar around his neck and reach out to hold the tag. He squirms and shivers, but lets you have a look.

"Harcourt? That's such a fancy name," you laugh.

"I was a circus pet," he blurts out, eyes widening like he can't believe he just spoke. "I-I ran away!"

"Well, nice to meet you," you say and give him a big hug, breathing in the dusty scent of his fur. "We're going to be best friends!"

So, that's how you made your unlikely friend. Nine years later, he's still runty and lanky, although he's almost as tall as you if he stands. You're still very good friends, even if he is a stubborn little shit and refuses to leave his den most of the time.

"I'm going to stop bringing you food," you tease one hazy afternoon as you watch him scarf down the ham and cheese sandwich you brought him.

"Then I'll steal your eggs," he says, licking his muzzle and then licking the taste of ham from your fingers, his sharp teeth nipping lightly at your skin.

"You already do that. You're lucky the hens are laying a surplus, otherwise, my mother would notice."

"I trade for the eggs though," he protests.

"The baskets of fruit that appear on our doorstep? I'm pretty sure you steal from the neighbor's orchard," you snicker.

He narrows his golden eyes at you and huffs.

"Never mind me, stolen fruit tastes sweeter." You tuck up your skirts and get on your hands and knees and crawl into his den uninvited, because you know he won't mind. "Oh, you enlarged it! And you took my advice and got some bedding- is that my spare quilt?!"

"Stop fussing already," he grumbles, squeezing in after you. "You don't need it. It gets cold out here."

"But you could have asked. Wait a second... No wonder I couldn't find these panties. You took these two!"

You burst into laughter and nudge him playfully with your foot. "You didn't even try to hide them. Shameless."

"You're not mad?" Harcourt curls up in a ball and tucks his nose into his tail, peering at you.

"No, but why did you take them?"

"They smelled good and they make me feel funny."

You slap a hand over your face. "Oh my god, it's almost like you grew up in the wild by yourself... Oh right, you did."

"What? Did I say something wrong?" He asks, perking his head up.

"Er, so what do you do with my panties? Just drape them over your nose and go to sleep?"

"First I chew on them."

"So I can see," you raise your eyebrows at the holes in your undergarments and drop them on the ground.

"I think there's something you're not telling me," Harcourt says.

"Definitely. You'll figure it out when your first mating season comes around," you reply and lie back against the quilt, staring up at the dirt ceiling.

A couple of roots are bared to the gaze. You learned long ago that it was best to keep your eyes closed in his den, otherwise, you'd get dirt in your eyes. You close your eyes now and Harcourt scoots closer, plopping his head on your stomach. You run your fingers through his fur, which is always silky now thanks to the brush you gifted him.

"Do humans have a mating season too?" He asks.

"Not really. But we are expected to pair off with another human and have babies. My mom has been talking about it since I turned eighteen. She's worried that I'm getting too old."

"Are you?" Harcourt sniffs. "You smell young to me."

"I have no idea what you mean, silly. I'm only twenty-one and I think there's plenty of time yet. I don't fancy any of the men in town because they're forceful with what they want. At this point, I need a stick to beat them off with."

"I can guard you," Harcourt offers.

"Oh no, don't do that. If you think my mother is bad, then you're not prepared for the men in town. Some of them might try to shoot you."

"Hmmm, it's why I stay away from humans," Harcourt murmurs sleepily. "They all want to shoot me or cage me up."

"A pity," you murmur back.

You end up dozing off with your hand still in his fur. Harcourt sleeps like he's still a kit, draping his body over you, then curling up at your side, and then nuzzling into his tail, constantly moving. You think nothing of it until you're completely woken up by his tongue rasping over your skin.

"Oi, I took a bath this week. I don't need another one," you grumble sleepily.

He purrs deep in his throat and licks your arm again, his body caged around you like he's a motherly cat.

"Hey," you cry in proper protest as he moves on to your hair. "Stop it."

"You always smell so nice," he purrs. "You smell nicer than your panties."

You huff out a laugh. "You're clueless, you overgrown fox-child. Release me, if I don't head home now, my mother will send someone to find me."

"Fine," he grumbles. "Don't take so long to visit next time."

"I won't," you promise as you scramble out of his den, shaking leaves and dirt out of your hair and clothes.

You look frightfully dirty and sneak back to your house and up the stairs to change before your mother catches you. For the next few days, you're incredibly busy. The harvest is in and all your time is spent preserving, canning, salting, drying, and pickling. You leave a few gifts tucked in a secret corner of the coop for Harcourt. The nights are becoming warm and the crickets sing. You wonder when the mating season begins for foxes, and when you'll see any more of them.

You know they're there, but they just don't live so close to human towns. In that way, Harcourt is a bit of an anomaly.

The next morning, you're taking in the morning eggs when you notice something strange. The chickens are milling around their coop, staring at something underneath. You crouch down to have a look and come face to face with a slender female werefox. She's crammed into the tiny space, which doesn't look very comfortable.

"Hi," you say. "Don't worry, I'm not going to hurt you."

"I know," she replies, and with a grunt of effort, she crawls out. "I was hiding from a male. I did not want to mate with him and he chased me all the way here. He did not dare to come close to the house so I have been hiding here until he goes away."

She lifts her muzzle and sniffs the air. "He is gone now," she says in satisfaction.

Her golden eyes fall on you and she says,

"I do not scare you, human?"

"No, I have a werefox friend who lives nearby."

"Yes, the lonely one. I have scented him around your house," she says. "He must like you to guard your property like this."

"I guess," you smile and glance back at your house. "I can't promise my mother will be happy to see you here, though."

"I need a place to sleep and a reliable male to den with. This fox friend of yours, he is good?" She asks.

"I would say so, yes."

"Then take me to him," she says, placing the soft pads of her paws against your arm and squeezing. "I would rather choose a male than be forced to pick one."

"I understand how you feel. Let me put the eggs away, then I'll join you."

Together you take the secluded path through the forest. Your new werefox acquaintance flits around you like a butterfly, listening for danger and cocking her head to the sound of rabbits or squirrels. You've never seen a female werefox before and you can't help looking at her breasts. The six of them are much more obvious than they would be on a male werefox, with rosy pronounced nipples like she's already had a litter or two.

When you get close to Harcourt's den, she bumps into you and stops you with a paw on your arm.

"Be aware he is in a rut," she says. "He may bite us and chase us."

"This is his first one," you say. "Does that make it any better?"

"No," she said. "He might not even realize who you are. He will want to mate with you."

"But that's what you're here for," you say quickly. "Let me look at him."

"I will wait." She grabs your cheeks and holds your face still, rubbing her muzzle against your neck and giving you a little lick. "I cannot promise what he will do to you when he scents me on your skin," she says. "Be cautious."

You trudge towards the den and stop a few feet away from the entrance.

"Harcourt?" You call out.

The growl you receive in response is immediate and none too friendly.

"Someone is in a mood," you mumble.

You crouch and crawl into the den, praying he doesn't bite your face off. Harcourt is curled up in an aggravated ball, his nose pushed into his fluffy tail for comfort. He glares at you.

"Are you okay?" You ask, looking him over.

He looks scrawnier than usual like he hasn't been hunting.

"No," he growls. "You didn't come and visit me."

"I'm sorry, there's been so much work to do in the house that I couldn't find any time to steal away," you sigh. "You didn't come for any of the gifts I left you."

"I can't. I'm miserable," Harcourt huffs. "I'm hot all over and I'm leaking everywhere and I've wanted to bite you and do things I cannot fathom. I was afraid I'd hurt you."

"Oh," you smile. "You're precious."

"I don't know what is happening to me!" He snaps, his ears pinning back. "And I ask that you leave me be until I am myself again."

"I can't do that," you say. "If you don't get any help you're going to be like this for a long time."

Harcourt blinks and uncurls his slender body, tail whisking against the quilt.

"You mean, it's never going away?"

He looks mournfully down at himself, at his pink cock that has poked out of its sheath and rubs against his belly, plastering the fur there with precum.

"No," he whispers. "But I can't stay like this! I can't sleep, I can't hunt, I can't even groom myself properly because it hurts."

He turns to look at you with dilated pupils. "You have to help me," he whimpers.

Before you can answer, the female werefox crawls into the den, and Harcourt freaks out, hissing and ducking behind you.

"Woah, calm down, she's with me," you say.

"I come in peace, little one," she says. "You're much younger than I thought you would be. Inexperienced. My name is Nitaki."

She looks around the den and wrinkles her muzzle.

"Get out of my den," Harcourt huffs. "Leave me alone."

She crawls forward, brushing her muzzle against your cheek. "The human is a friend to you?" She hums.

"She's mine," he snaps.

"Um," you begin, but neither of them pays attention to you as they face each other with wrinkled noses and bared teeth.

Nitaki stares him down imperiously until he gives up and looks away with a whimper. Whining your name, he attempts to scoot back to your side, but she blocks him off.

"I want only one thing from you. To end this cycle of heat."

"I-I don't know how," Harcourt says anxiously, nostrils flaring as he takes in the cacophony of scents from both females, so different and yet so alike.

It makes him disoriented and dizzy.

"I will teach you," she says, prowling closer.

He leans away, even snapping when she gets too close. Frustrated at his rejection, she spins around and locks her eyes on you.

"It is your human female you truly want, is it not?"

Harcourt's pupils widen more than you had thought they could. His tongue lolls out of his mouth and his sides heave.

"Yes..." He says.

"Um, that's not-" You begin, but Nitaki flicks her ears and holds out a paw to you.

"Join us," she urges. "And we can all get what we want."

"But I..."

"Please?" Harcourt says, his claws digging into the quilt as his cock throbs against his belly. "I want you."

You're still hesitating when Nitaki pounces on Harcourt, knocking him onto his back. He growls and tries to push her off. But the Nitaki is stronger than him, a true alpha female. She keeps him down and ignores his squirming, leaning down and placing her teeth around his neck. He goes still immediately and his eyes roll wildly as he whimpers.

"What are you doing?" You ask.

"I want him to submit to me," she mumbles against his fur. "I do not have patience for teaching."

Once she's satisfied that Harcourt is subdued, she rolls off of him and gets on her hands and knees, displaying herself for him. Perhaps her pheromones finally penetrate his dumb skull or he finally realizes what he's meant to do. Either way, he crawls up to her, sniffing the air. He growls and bares his teeth, fumbling at her hips. She flicks her tail out of the way and shuffles her knees open wider, waiting.

You can see how wet she is.

"Human, help him," Nitaki commands. "Are we shall be here for the rest of the day."

Silently, you move over. Harcourt jumps a mile when you take his cock in your hand. It's different from a man's, pink and slippery and with a slightly flared head. It looks huge, throbbing menacingly in your palm. Harcourt whimpers, and his body trembles. You guide him to the female werewolf and feel her lubrication wet your fingers as you press him in.

It doesn't go exactly as you had imagined. Nitaki is content to drive her hips against him and does most of the work while he shivers and clutches her hips. When he cums, it startles him most of all. He tries to pull out, but she grabs his paws and pulls him against her back, unrelenting. He gives up and leans heavily against her, panting.

Finally, she pulls away and shakes herself off. Harcourt slumps onto the quilt, dazed. His cock is still throbbing and leaking cum lazily.

"Good luck with your little runt," Nitaki says to you. "I have what I needed."

With that, she scrambles out of the den and leaves the two of you to your own devices.

"Harcourt? Are you okay?" You lean over him.

His eyes open and he grunts. "I want to do it again," he says. "But with you this time."

─────────────── · · · · ✦

So stressed right now, ngl. Reblog/like if you want me to write part two of this crazy shit!

[sturn-iolo0171]

Candy

Chris sturniolo X fem reader

summary:You and the triplets have been best friends for as long as you can remember. There were no problems in your relationship with them except one thing. Nicks, one of your best friends, so you made a rule that you can't date one of his brothers. Which was a big problem because you and Chris liked each other but never said anything.

Warings: Smut, swearing, pet names p in v

You and the triplets went to the store to buy some candy for the movie night you guys have been planning. You and Chris sneak off to get some chocolate. You just picked a random one because Matt and Nick were coming, and they told you not to get anymore. Little did you know you picked up sex chocolate. Later that night, you were all sitting down, getting ready to watch the movie. Matt was sitting in the corner of the couch, Chris was sitting in the middle and nick, and you sat in the other corner. Your phone goes off, and look to see it's Chris texting you. You get confused because he's right next to you.

She's just like candy, she's so sweet

But you know that it ain't real cherry

Know that it ain't real cherry

She's just like candy, she's so sweet

But you know that it ain't real

Know that it ain't real

You leave the room, and Chris leaves 2 minutes after you. "Ooooo, I can't wait to eat these, and Nick and Matt aren't stealing them." You and Chris both eat the chocolate they taste a bit off, so you check the date. "Uhhhh, Chris," you say in a nervous voice. "Yeah Y/N is there something wrong?" Chris says confused "Yeah ummm theses aren't normal chocolate. " "What are they? They taste amazing, " Chris says, inspecting the chocolate. "Chris, there sex chocolate." Chris pauses, looks at you in shock. "Oh my god, what do we do? we just ate them Y/n. " "I don't know Chris, I don't know what to do." You and Chris walk back into the living room, not thinking much of it.

Sugar coated, lies unfolded

You still lick the wrapper

Chris crawls over to you, shoving Nick out of the way. "Chris, what do you think you doing? Go away," Nick says angrily. "No, it's my turn to sit with Y/n" "no its not. I invited her over, not you." Nick rolls his eyes.

It's addictive, you know this

But you still lick the wrapper

The movie ends, and Nick and Matt go to bed. "Are they in bed?" Chris asks in a rush. "Yeah," you say, running back over to Chris. As soon as you sit down, Chris latches onto your lips like a hungry dog. You guys make out for a good 10 mins you both pull apart out of breath. Chris tugged on your shorts, asking if it's okay. You just nod your head as Chris slides off your shorts and his pants. Chris starts fiddling with the hem of your shirt. You take the hint and pull it off over your head. As Chris does the same, he starts kissing down your neck to your panties. "Can I take them off?" "Mhm, " you say, nodding quickly, making Chris laugh.

Sugar coated, lies unfolded

You still lick the wrapper

You can feel Chris's breath on your heat as he slowly starts eating you out. It felt like a dream as Chris pushed his tongue in and out, earning a moan from you. He moves his face from your heat. "Baby be quite don't want my brothers to hear now do we?". you want to grab his hair, but you're too scared in case you hurt him. "You can touch me, baby, you know?". You latch onto his hair and start pulling it, holding back moans. "Chr- Chris, I'm s-so close," you say as your legs start to shake. "Go on baby let it out" with those words you cum all in his mouth.

It's addictive, you know this

You still lick the wrapper

After you come down from your high, Chris flips you over so you are on top. Chris lines up his tip with your entrance and slowly pulls you down. You start grinding slowly on his dick he starts moaning under you. "Shhh baby, don't want your brothers to hear now, do we?" You say mocking him. You go faster as he starts moaning louder and louder you quickly cover his mouth with your hand to muffle the moans. "Fuck fuck fuck fuck" Chris says in almost a whisper. "I'm so close baby keep going fuck" your legs slowly give out underneath you. "Fuck ma your doing so good" Chris says trying not to moan. "I'm so close oh fuckkk" " me to baby fuck me Chris" with that you both cum. You look down, Chris is just a whimpering moaning mess under you.

You look over at the clock on the TV. 6:52am it read. "SHIT!!" You say loudly Chris looks at you scared. "What? What's wrong?" He says in a panic. You jump off Chris and start getting your clothes on. "Have I done something wrong?" He asks, worried. "No, Chris! Look at the time and the day, " u say quickly. Chris seems so confused until he looks at the day "OH SHIT FUCK SHIT FUCK" Chris says hurrying to grab he's clothes. You and Chris both forgot that you have a really important meeting at 7 and didn't realise you have been fucking all night. Nick wakes up and walks down stairs you and Chris are sat down fully dressed and ready "What's going on?" Nick asks confused. "Whattttt nothings wrong?" You say forcing a smile trying not to laugh incase matt or nick heard you and Chris last night. "Rightttt okay how is Chris fully dressed it's fucking 6:55am he's never dressed we are always late". Matt walks in and stops in his tracks when he see you and Chris. "Morning matt" Chris says calmly " morning Chris morning y/n" he says smirking. "What's with the smirk matt?" You asked nervous incase he actually did hear you both. "Nothinggggg everythings fine" he says weirdly. "Right well I geuss someone had a good sleep" nick says laughing "yeah I did but Chris and y/n must of had a better time last night then me".

Your face drops, and Chris goes pale. "What are you talking about, Matt?" Nick says genuinely, confused, looking over and Chris and you. "Guys, what am i talking about? wanna tell him?" Matt says, smirking once again. When he catchee on, his eyes widen. "OH MY GOD DID YOU GUYS FUCK ON THE COUCH LAST NIGHT". Chris looks terrified and you just buried your face in your hands thinking nicks mad at you. "CONGRATULATIONS I GEUSS but your buying a new couch I'm not you can fuck off" he says walking into the kitchen. You look up confused " wait your not mad?" "No why would I be mad I'm happy that you to are together just not happy you fucked on my couch" "wait but what about the rule?" You say tilting your head to the side. "Oh that stupid rule I thought it was a joke aha" he says laughing and waving his waffle about. "Oh thank god for that" "YOUR STILL BUYING ME A NEW COUCHHHHHHH"

You all walk to the kitchen to eat breakfast and head out to the meeting, which actually went really well.

Thank guys for reading. This is my first story. I've never written a smut or anything type of story before. Sorry if it's kind of bad, I'm working on it all.

[woso-dreamzzz]

Cub and Älskling 

Mapi Leon x Ingrid Engen x Child!Reader (Cub)

Fridolina Rolfö x Child!Reader (Cub) x Älskling 

Summary: You meet Frido's Älskling 

The baby is very little.

She's small and cute and is cradled very tightly in Frido's arms.

You stare at her, eyes not moving as she wiggles around. Her eyes are wide as she stares back at you.

You lean closer and her little hand is free of her blankets.

She punches you in the face, right in the nose.

You gasp.

"Mami," You say, turning to look at her," She's so cool!"

Mami laughs in disbelief. "Cool, huh? She just punched you."

"Yeah!" You nod frantically," And I'm bigger than her! She's so cool! Is she your baby Tia Frido?"

Frido shakes her head. "She's my baby sister. I like to call her Älskling."

"Hi, Älskling," You say before gasping again," She smiled at me! Ingrid, did you see? She smiled at me!"

"She must like you, Cub," Ingrid says," You're very likeable."

"I know," You reply," But Mami says babies are difficult sometimes. It's good that she likes me."

You've been waiting for ages to meet Tia Frido's little sister. You weren't at training the day the rest of the team met her.

Ingrid had to send you to nursery that day because it was picture day and Mami really wanted a fancy picture of you.

It made you a little sad to not meet Älskling then but you're happy you can meet her at your house. She keeps looking at you and smiling and you smile back.

She looks really cool and Frido sets her on the floor to explore there. She can't crawl just yet but she can sit up and look around.

She reaches for you and you shuffle closer.

"Careful, cub," Mami says," Remember, Älskling's only little. You must use gentle hands like with Bagheera."

You nod very seriously and get closer again, sitting on your knees. You've got the magic wiggles but you're trying to keep them at bay because you don't want to scare Älskling.

You give her your hand and she wraps a whole hand around one of your fingers. You stare at her, mouth slightly hanging open as she lets go of you.

She grunts, hand curling into a fists as she punches your finger.

You giggle, wiggling a little bit on your knees in excitement.

"She keeps punching me!" You tell no one in particular," She's so cool! Can we keep her, Tia Frido?"

Frido grins triumphantly. "I knew you'd be on my side! But, sadly, she has to go back to Sweden at some point. She lives with my parents. I'd have to kidnap her if she stayed here."

"That's okay," You tell her," You can stay here. Älskling can sleep in my room and you can sleep in bed with Mami and Ingrid!"

Mapi turns pale at that thought.

"I think it would be better if Älskling stayed with her parents, cub."

You flash her a disgruntled look. "Älskling's my new best friend," You say," She can't leave!"

"Don't worry," Frido says," I'll be making sure she comes to visit a lot."

You nod. "Good because she's my new best friend and I want to show her everything."

That sparks an idea in you and you hurry off to your toy crate. You didn't use to have one until Ingrid moved in, took one look at the messy apartment and came back with little crates and storage bins to put things in.

You kind of like your toy crate now because all of them are in the exact same place and you know where to put them when you're done playing - though Ingrid has to remind you a lot to actually put them back in the crate.

You grab a few things you think will interest Älskling like your yellow digger and your magnifying glass. You snatch your løve (lion) from the sofa as well and crowd into Älskling's space again.

She's smiling again and making little giggly sounds as Frido tickles her.

"Here, Älskling," You say, placing your yellow digger next to her. You demonstrate how it moves before showing her the magnifying glass. She seems more interested in that than anything else so you let her hold it.

She's got a very good grip and lifts the toy up to her face before putting it in her mouth. You giggle when she pulls a face at the taste but then sticks it right back into her mouth.

"She's silly," You tell Ingrid," But still fun!"

"You were silly," Ingrid tells you.

"But not now."

She laughs. "But not now."

You keep your distance from Älskling for a little bit, playing by Frido's feet with Bagheera and your digger. You let your magic wiggles all run out before you're up on your feet again and ask the question you've wanted to ask since Frido arrived.

"Can I hold her?"

"Say please, Cub," Ingrid prompts and you correct yourself.

"Can I hold her, please?"

"Of course!" Frido says, tapping the spot next to her," Let's get you comfortable."

[btsgotjams27]

this is us ~ jjk | drabble

a fun girl’s night with yuna and hyunie.

✨ title: this is us | (sequel to all grown up) ✨ pairing: jungkook x f!reader | ✨ rating: m/18+ | minors dni ✨ genre/au: drama, romance, angst, fluff, smut | est!relationship, age gap, bff's younger brother ✨ playlist ✨ a/n: if you haven’t read the prequel to this, please do so here! :) you can read them here on AO3 & Wattpad

[ SERIES MASTERLIST ] | next ✨ drabble ~ the reveal

drabble ~ girls night out | wc: 1.9k warnings: language, reader takes boudoir photos, reader is insecure about her body

You 7:39 PM Hey, you still do photography right?

Hyunie 7:41 PM Yes...👀

You 7:43 PM Would you be able to take some pictures of me?

Hyunie 7:44 PM What kind of pics? 👀

You 7:45 PM Lol why do you keep using that emoji?!

Hyunie 7:45 PM 🤣 Idk. Yeah babe, I'll take whatever pics you need! Just let me know.

When Hyunie received your text about what you wanted to give Jungkook as a surprise, her jaw dropped to the ground, but regardless, she was excited to help you out. She booked the fanciest hotel in Seoul and even teased you about it costing an arm and a leg to secure.

"Babe, you are a menace. I can't believe you want to do this for Jungkook," Hyunie said while setting up her camera and lights.

"It's honestly the least I could do for him. He's done so much for me." You yelled as you were in the bathroom, getting changed into a lacey black number, shimmying your breasts, and shifting them into a better position. You grabbed the oversized white button-down to cover yourself somewhat.

As you walked out of the bathroom, Hyunie whistled at the tiny outfit that clung to your body. "Jeez, babe, Jungkook will die when he sees these photos."

"That's my intention," you smirked as you walked towards her. "Okay, where do you want me?" You're not sure where this burst of confidence came from but doing a boudoir photo shoot was something you've always wanted to do, and it was now or never, considering your body was in its prime state. And to be honest, the best person to do this for was Jungkook, and you wouldn't consider doing it for anyone else but him.

Hyunie pointed to the bed. "Here," she said as she pulled the duvet and ruffled it a bit to make it look like it was slept in. You crawled onto the bed, unsure how to pose or position yourself. "Here, I want you to pose like this." Hyunie modeled on the bed how she wanted you.

"Like this?" You asked while feeling extremely awkward at this very moment. You were in sexy lingerie getting photographed by one of your good friends. How else was one supposed to feel?

"Mmhm, perfect," she said, cocking her head to the side, giving you a wide grin. She loved that you wanted to do this and couldn't wait to see the outcome of everything. She held her camera up but paused and came forward to move a strand of hair out of the way. "Okay, don't be scared or nervous about this whole thing. I want you to be able to feel sexy and comfortable. Let your confidence show through."

You sighed. "Okay..." You weren't even sure what that meant, but it was time to suck it up and do this thing. You could do this...it was for Jungkook.

"Arch your back a little, so your booty can pop out a bit." You did as she asked. "Yeah, yup, just like that, perfect!"

Thankfully Hyunie agreed to this because you weren't sure if you'd be comfortable like this with anyone else. You asked Yuna to come to hang out, too, so that she could have a night away from Namjoon and relax in an expensive hotel room. She didn't know about your little shoot, but you'd tell her once she arrived.

"I can see that you're still a little nervous, so come on, babe, shake off the nerves. You're sexy and hot, and remember how much this will drive Jungkook insane." Hyunie said with the biggest grin. Pictures like this would drive any man off a cliff.

You sat down on your heels and shook out whatever nerves were tensing up in your body. You're sexy, and you're hot, and Jungkook will be on his knees after he sees these photos, you said to yourself, hyping this whole situation up.

The photoshoot took two hours or so, and Hyunie showed you a few photos here and there that she took of you. You couldn't recognize who the person was in those photos. Jungkook always brought out something in you that you didn't know you had, for which you were grateful. His confidence and swag evoked a part of you that once resided in you.

You and Hyunie already changed into fluffy white robes to make yourself comfy for the rest of the night. A doorbell interrupted your conversation and guessing it was Yuna. When you opened the door for her, she gawked at the room.

"Am I missing something here? What's the special occasion?" Yuna asked, hanging her bag on the hook near the front entrance. "There's a fucking doorbell for this room. A doorbell! My honeymoon suite wasn't even this fancy." She said with a chuckle, taking a seat next to you.

"Hi, best friend. I missed you," you said, leaning in and hugging her.

"I literally saw you last week," Yuna teased.

Hyunie gestured to pour Yuna a glass of champagne, but she refused. "Thanks, I'm okay. I still don't feel good these days, so that I won't drink anything. I came for the wonderful company."

"Still don't feel good? Have you seen a doctor?" You asked with concern in your voice. 

Yuna chewed on her bottom lip, debating if she should tell you and Hyunie the real reason why she's been feeling sick, but she decided against it for now. "Yeah, I'm fine. I think it's just a weird bug or something. It'll pass," Yuna said, lying through her teeth. It was for a good reason, she thought, convincing herself.

The rest of the night consisted of giggles and fun conversations. You made a note to yourself that all of you needed to do this regularly, for yourselves and self-care. It was nice to get away from all the boys, even for a night.

"Okay, wait, why are we here again? No one ever told me." Yuna inquired again since her question went unanswered.

"You wanna tell her, or should I just show her?" Hyunie smirked, giving you a mischievous look.

Yuna's eyes narrowed at the two of you, wondering what was happening. "Show me what?"

You nodded at Hyunie, beckoning for her to show Yuna the pictures. Hyunie giggled, scurrying away to grab her camera. She plopped herself down next to Yuna, turning on her camera. Suddenly, your cheeks were beginning to warm and grow hotter. Considering these sexy photos were for her younger brother, you weren't sure what she'd say or how she'd react, so you partially hid underneath the fluffy robe, awaiting her reaction.

She leaned into Hyunie to see what all the fuss was about. Her eyes widened, and she cried, "HOLY SHIT--WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK! Jungkook is going to go feral after he sees these!" Yuna smirked, shaking her head. "You are a mad woman."

You shrugged, now relaxing on the couch. "Anything for Jungkook."

"Yeah, no shit...he's brought out such a different side of you, but I love it. It reminds me of 'you' when we were younger." Yuna said, clicking through the rest of the photos. She would twist and turn her head to check out the different angles. "Babe...honestly, these are so beautiful. Hyunie did a great job capturing your essence. He's going to love these," she flashed another smile. "And Hyunie...the talent you have." Yuna gestured a chef's kiss at Hyunie's work.

Hyunie grinned, tucking her hair behind her ear, "Why thank you."

"When are you going to give this to Jungkookie?" Yuna wiggled her eyebrows.

"Soon...whenever Hyunie edits and prints them out, I'll surprise him. I can't wait to see his reaction to these." You thought about what Yuna said, how Jungkook brought out a different side of you, someone you once knew. You supposed a part of you was hidden away due to the nature of growing up and having to hide a specific piece of you that the world dismantled - may it be your family, school, or work. But Jungkook always brought liveliness into your relationship, which felt refreshing.

"Who said once you turn thirty, your life is over?" Hyunie remarked with a puzzled look on her face. "I'm halfway through my twenties, but honestly, it's only the beginning of our lives. I still have so much I want to do and accomplish, and I feel like I have my whole life ahead of me."

Yuna shrugged. "I'm guilty of thinking the same thing when I was in my teens and twenties, and I didn't think I'd get married until a lot later in life, but here I am, married and--" She stopped herself before she spilled the beans.

You and Hyunie looked at her strangely but let whatever she wanted to say go.

"I think everyone's scared once they start heading towards thirty. I was also scared because, like you, Hyunie, I felt I hadn't accomplished anything significant. But then again, whose standards are we trying to live up to, you know? Ours or societies? And maybe when we're younger, we'll have it all figured out by thirty, but to be honest, I don't know shit," you said, watching your friends. The three of you laughed. "I'm serious...sometimes I don't know what I'm doing with my life," you stressed.

The plan of getting married was unsuccessful, and life took an unexpected turn when you started dating Jungkook. You needed to figure out what the future held for the two of you, and taking it slow for now is a good idea.

"I think that's normal, though. We go through life not knowing what's ahead of us." Hyunie explained. "We do things on a whim or what we feel is right...We can try to plan our lives, but sometimes it never goes our way."

Everyone nodded along and agreed. You sipped the last of your champagne glass and set it down on the coffee table.

Hyunie groaned and then yawned, "Can we please do this more often? I'm in dire need of women in my life."

"I'm always up for anything like this. Just say the word, and I'll be here," Yuna stated, then she cocked her head to the side. "What happened with Jungkookie's friend? The one that came to visit a while back? Weren't you talking to him?"

"Oh...yeah. I'm uh---flying out to see him in a few weeks."

You gasped and smacked her arm. "You are?! Is this a serious thing or...?"

"We've chatted almost every day since he left." She explained while rubbing the spot you hit. "And OW!"

"Wow...you've been keeping things from me! From us?!" You shouted, not believing the audacity of her holding important information from you and Yuna.

"What? I don't want to jinx anything...but I like him, and I'm going to visit him to see where this all goes. That's it."

Yuna cocked her eyebrow. "Sure, sure. Or you're going so you guys can fuck--"

"YUNA!" Both you and Hyunie exclaimed so loud that the people in the next room could probably hear you.

"Okay, maybe that too," Hyunie confessed with a cackle. "He's fucking hot, and we barely had a chance to connect when he was here."

You and Yuna held your tongue, wanting to avoid further the conversation into that territory. You'd wait to hear about her trip when she got back.

"ANYWAYS! We should head to bed. It's getting late," you said before grabbing the champagne flutes and heading off to the sink. "Yuna, you can take the big room if you want. Hyunie and I will share. You deserve a big bed, and I bet Namjoon takes up most of yours."

Yuna laughed, "He does! It's so big, but are you sure?"

Both you and Yuna nodded. "Yeah, babes! Go for it. It's all yours. Good night."

✨ next ~ drabble: the reveal

[kerryweaverlesbian]

2023, cawis created...

Last year I made a post (which I cannot find) delighted to have published 81,932 words to Ao3 over 20 fics. This year I beat that with 111,227! 25 fics new last year! and that's not including poetry or things I only posted to tumblr! How wonderful!! I'm gonna do a little commentary on each of them (and I will thoughtfully put it below the cut because as I said there are 25. There is a "horny" section with some explicit quotes so just scroll past to the next heading if you don't want to see that lol.

Comedies I like to go hehehe hahaha

Stakes Aren't Just For Vampires Cas and Dean get high and silly "You're repulsive," Dean says by rote, and he isn't sure if he meant it to but it comes out cloying and sweet, like an affectionate nickname.

The first one I posted last year! It took me until March :0 I wrote this one. For maybe a slightly mean reason haha. I saw a fic where Cas did a bet for money and I was like ?? why would CAS care about getting money?? So I tried to think of a situation where he would make a bet and this one materialized!

Did you notice! I used the old reliable Rule Of Three to make the ending of Dean not sure if he said "I love you" or just thought it more potent? He thinks and then immediately says what he's thinking twice before: Cas is perfect/"You're perfect" - Dean wants to kiss him/"I want to kiss you" - and then: "I love you Cas," he thinks he says. I chose "1000 dollars" from the CBBC comedy sketch show Stupid sketch where 2 old ladies ask how much something costs and it's a normal amount and they mishear as "A thousand pounds?! You can't expect me to buy a bun for a thousand pounds. Shame on you!! I am taking my business ELSEWHERE!". The comments won't all be this long lmao (<- edit: she's wrong)

I'll Drink To That Sam and Dean both come out as bisexual at the same time late in life and they're both flabbergasted "What, do you think about how every friend we have would be in bed?"  Dean tips his head to the ceiling thoughtfully and Sam wants to melt into the floor.  "You're horrible. I hate you. I hate spending time with you." 

The SECOND one I posted last year!! I had to cut off a joke where it's suggested that Cas may have had sex with Jesus Christ (but it's very possible he's just messing with Dean) for the sake of flow. First fic I chatted with @homoangel about so I always think of him when I think of this fic <3

I'VE CRAWLED FURTHER INTO THE VCR Cas's dream of being vored by the VCR machine is finally realised Intricate, high effort collaboration, all for the relatively unimportant end of entertaining other humans for somewhere around an hour and a half. The entire enterprise amounts to making pleasing shapes and noises for each other. Fruitless. Pointless...To spend months, years even, producing something, the only purpose of which is to waste more time…the decadence was astounding. [horny]

Speaking of fics that make me think of my friends! Wrote this for dear @castielsprostate's 1k event. Get weird get wild!! He is THE teevee angel and I love him I love him I love him for it!!!!!!

Tragedies Auogh ouch ow ouchies. Hehe <3

The Aftermath Dean and Cas have sex. It was great. Dean can't let it happen again. "He wonders - and he shouldn't, but - he wonders if Cas will sit here again, later, feeling out the absences that Dean is going to leave behind."

The THIRD one I posted this year!!! I went directly from silly silly silly to "[Dean] is a practical man, always has been. If there's something behind you that would kill you to look at it, you just don't look at it.". I think this is one of my best (<- guy who is going to say this about most of her fics sajbfhsv. I wouldn't post them if I wasn't proud of them!!)

Time/Body Problem Cas and Dean make out in the car before Cas's date in Heaven Can't Wait. It doesn't change anything. he's all sensation now, mind-body-time melted together like carved figures on a wax candle.

I wrote this and Aftermath on the same day. I was THINKING about how Dean and Cas so so so often ALMOST have it. Dean, here, is enthralled by the idea that Cas is human now and could want him (although, Cas definitely also wants him as an angel lmao but this is what Dean thinks) but also put off by it. When they kiss, he sees Cas as angelic, with a streetlamp halo, able to melt time, but when Cas is walking away from him, he's just some human guy who, crucially, can't save Dean anymore. Cas had reliably been the guy who could blast into any dangerous situation and come out on top (hot) and while that's not the only thing Dean likes about him, it WAS such a relief for scaredboy dangerlife Dean to have a guy who makes things SAFE. And now he can't. So the risk of making their relationship deeper feels even greater. Perhaps it is a selfish thought for Dean to want Cas to be able to rescue him still, but they're both in such perilous positions. He's worried for Cas too.

Oh did yous get the title by the way? It's like the mind/body problem which is, 'is the mind separate from the body or are they completely inextricable'? 'If I think of something sad and start crying while I'm hormonal, is that feeling from by body or from my mind' is how I understand it, but I'm not a philosopher haha. So time/body problem is like, all three of: Does their relationship need human senses and physical touch in order to be meaningful? Does Castiel's new experience of linear time (aka not being an angel) change how he and Dean relate to each other? And also, the more straightforward, they don't have enough time. Not to say I thought all that when the phrase came into my head, it's just bc I knew the phrase mind/body problem and mind slant rhymes with time, but that's why I liked it enough to use as a title haha.

Smoke Breaks series Dean and Cas share cigarettes at different points in their lives. Cas trails off, taking another long pull. He's going to smoke the whole thing at this rate, rude and overindulgent. Dean doesn't begrudge him, neither the cigarette nor the silence. He knows what he means. 

Someone told me in the comments that reading the first one fit exactly into their actual smoke break I was like WOAH :0!!! Smoking is, unfortunately, really sexy.......I keep trying to think of a way to add another fic to make this thing end on a positive note but the theme of smoking thwarts that haha. Inherently, it is about doing something you know is unhealthy and grey and makes you feel worse, like hunting, like endverse Cas's relationship with endverse Dean, like coming back to see the lover you hurt when you can't touch them or change anything, but it's always bitter sweet because you sometimes get that burst of relief. (That's not a commentary on smokers, just on the theme of smoking as used by this series!)

The last one I think drives that home most bluntly, "No amount of talking is going to change anything." but they still hold on to each other. Also in the last one, I just wanted them to be in kind of miserable surroundings and decided on a weird, dank, alice in wonderland themed motel room, which is a) something interesting to describe when I need space between dialogue and b) the ill-advised freaky looking murals of half-humanoid Wonderland characters is a reflection of how Castiel feels - not human enough, not Other enough, twisted out of shape and c) it 'reflects' (I'm about to do a pun) their relationship has gone 'through the looking glass' (teehee) from the understood 'brothers in arms' to a strange, uncertain place where the rules have changed.

Shaking Out The Nest John gets frustrated by Dean asking to visit Sam at college. "I talk a lot of shit, but [Sam]'s always gonna be family. He's..." the only reason I'm alive, same as you, John can't quite get to come out of his mouth, so instead he repeats, "He's good."

In the demon plane episode where it's revealed that John would rave about Sam getting a full scholarship to Stanford. I think about it SO MUCH. John loved his kids but that didn't make him a suitable parent. I wanted to explore those complicated emotions and the thought patterns that might lead him to what he does. Like I don't think it's deliberately thought out scheming malice that makes him say things that make Dean feel worthless. But he only sees him as a kid when he "fails" at being an "adult" (as in, when Dean disagrees with him) and he thinks it's his job as a parent to tell Dean to knock that off. He wouldn't see his reframing of Sam leaving to "He left both of us because of his pettiness" as playing them off against each other, even though he IS, he'd see it as telling the hard truth and trusting his son to be a grown up about it. John is very emotional and parenting just via your own emotions rather than being able to step back and go 'am I being fair? is this a reasonable response to what's actually happening?' leads to situations like John blaming Dean for the Schtriga incident or saying he should 'rot in jail' for stealing peanut butter.

Horny ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Close Zoom (too close) Dean and Cas make out for the first time while watching a movie. Cas gets overexcited. [Cas] replays the experience of holding Dean; the way his eyelids had fluttered shut with relief when their mouths first connected; the lean in by increments that ended with Dean on top of him....He wants to touch him. No, he amends the oft repeated thought, he wants to touch him again. 

I also wrote this inspired by going huh??? from another fic where they watch a movie together on a date on a first date and DON'T make out like. What are we doing here gang. If they are "watching a movie" and enjoy making out, then they ARE making out before the credits roll lmao. (In MY humble opinion!!!) Obviously chose The Mummy bc Dean's bisexual and I KNOW that man is showing Cas all his Formative To My Sexuality movies as a move to try and suss out what Cas's preferences are. The Lost Boys, Mr & Mrs Smith, Van Helsing, Labyrinth, Indiana Jones, Charlie's Angels, the list goes on.... Also my first installment with Cas having a bit of a pain kink (excited by the thought of a shock collar lol which I havvve been thinking about doing something more with.)

I have. by the way. a second work in progress where Cas gets wayyy more worked up than he was expecting and Dean is similar to here, slowing him down so it's not overwhelming, so look forward to it!!!!

Thunderstruck Cas has them struck by lightening while Dean sucks him off. HELL YEAH. Emanating from Castiel are intermittent bursts of white electric light, shocking across the black sky, sketching outlines of six invisible spread wings. That same light forms thin circular halos behind Cas’s head, some small, some so massive Dean can only see them in pieces. His eyes too - completely obscured by brilliant white light. He is radiant in all senses of the word. 

hehehehe. If your boyfriend can make it safe to be struck by lightening like you GOTTA do it just for the experience. I decided to have Dean not be like, blown away by it (but he is blown away by seeing a bit of trueform Cas) and instead find it just kind of weird but not bad to try and be true to life. sometimes you try something and don't love it or hate it and that's okay! Normal part of having sex. Sex is just another activity with lots of things you can do with it. That, and, it can't all be high points lol. That's why Cas is a little subdued when Dean says he only has 6 wings. peaks and valleys :)

The Feeling Is Enough Service top Dean :) "Cas - Cas, please...please can I come?" Cas doesn't say anything, just smiles up at him adoringly.

This one was bc @faithdeans lamented the lack of service top Dean destiel and I raced to his aid. Literally Dean would LOVE doing this.

Red Velvet Lines The Black Box Vampire!Dean sucking Cas's blood :) Cas is the only angel human enough to have workable blood.... And even if there were anyone else, Dean wouldn't want them. His is the only blood in Dean's veins.

This one was bc @domesticatedangel lamented the lack of vampire destiel smut and I raced to her aid. Castiel the rebel angel being horny over being given an order that he chooses to follow of his own volition? It's more likely than you think! The unmissable return of Castiel's pain kink lmao, even moreso in the second chapter. His penis! in peril!!!!!

The Girl Is Dead. Long Live The Woman. (Anna/Pamela*) Anna visits Pamela to find out what she wants and they have sex :) "I'm not used to - being part of things still. Being touchable. I didn't make the most of it, as a human. I didn't do enough. I was afraid. Embarrassed of my own feeling. I think I wasted my life."  "Be fair. You were a kid for most of it. You didn't know who you were." 

THIS one was because @honestlyhaunted lamented the lack of Pamela/Anna smut and I RACED to their aid. You may be noticing a theme. It's quite possible that if you sigh forlornly over a lack of erotica and I see it that something will be done about it. No promises though lol.

I tried to go for a more season 4 and 5 "everyone just fully states their unique moral philosophy out loud" vibe. And a "Pamela's disability actually affects her life in a practical way" vibe that the show itself elected to ignore. I DID get distracted a few times from my goal of "they have hot sex" because I got too invested in Anna's weird life. As I said in a comment response, Anna is the butterfly that wants to squash herself back into her cocoon. She went from being very emotionally present in her body as a human to having a very flat affect as an angel again (in part because she didn't feel the need to mask her autism anymore. Anna's autistic just like Cas and Hannah and people are not saying this!!!!). And, finally. I wanted a woman to have sex with a woman using a strap on because I hadn't done that yet LOL.

*If this ship was more prominent we could be calling it Pamelanna which is very fun to say.

The Dog, the Lamb and the Butcher Dean and Crowley are having sex during their summer of love and Cas is caught watching them >:3 Then again, fairness doesn't seem to be the watchword here. Dean's looking up at him with what could be adoration, but there's a wildness to him too, a sparkling mischief that undercuts any implied promise of loyalty.  "You like me, don't you Cas? You like me. Uhhn -" A groan born out of Crowley picking up the pace again, making Dean rock into the mattress, "You like me. You like me all the time, no matter what I do. You even like me now." 

Nobody asked for this I have no one to blame but myself. I love and adore the Dean who cannot speak his feelings no matter how much he wants to but there is always room in my heart for an overemotional Demon!Dean who says and does whatever he wants because he's lost the ability to care about the consequences. We could have had it alllllll.

Ask for it Cas caught casturbating by Dean. What happens next WON'T surprise you. His breathing is labored, and he's making quiet sounds of effort, which probably have something to do with the fact that his fingers are pushing in and out of the wet, open pussy between his legs. The pace doesn't slow at Dean's interruption, giving Dean ample time to absorb the image of Cas’s long fingers being swallowed to the last knuckle. 

I am asking here now. I am the one sighing forlornly. I don't CARE that there are already 232 accidental voyeurism destiel fics. MAKE MORE. SHOW ME MORE. SHOW ME MORE. I WANT TO READ MORE. MORE SHAMELESSLY SELF-PLEASURING CASTIEL AND/OR DEAN AND THEY DON'T HAVE A SOCIAL SCRIPT FOR THIS SITUATION SO THEY'RE JUST GOING ON INSTINCT AND THEIR INSTINCT IS TO BE CRAZY HORNY ABOUT IT. SHOW ME MORE!!!!!

Ahem. Or don't teehee. This was my most self indulgent smut (and that's really saying something!!!!). I highly recommend just fuckin going for it because it means I get to reread something all the time that is exactly suited to my tastes!! Hell yeah!!

Fluff :3 this is uwu-hat uwu've aww been uwu-ating fow :3

Pretty Wife Closeted to even himself genderqueer Dean inadvertently insists that he's Cas's wife. Neither of them are opposed! "I think I understand," Cas says, nodding to himself with his 'I got it' smile, "Yes. We are playing roles. I will 'take out the trash' while you 'sit there and look pretty'."

My kingdom for genderqueer dean. He's literally butch. Helloooo!!

Okay that's all for fluff. LOL. SORRY. I post most of my fluff directly to tumblr!!

Carefully Plotted!!! These are the big ones!!!!!!!! All three of these are "One of my best".

A Light Above Descending Cas gives Dean his Grace to calm his Mark of Cain rages. He assumes Dean doesn't remember what he tells him when he's being fed, so he allows himself to be kind. He assumes Dean would prefer that he quietly sacrifice his life for him. He assumes that he hasn't got any family left who love him. He's wrong. A rat gets what a rat gets, is the phrase that repeats in his head, although he can’t speak them over the pounding of his heart, a rat gets what a rat gets.

I have talked about this one at great length in my #cawis commentary tag so I will not reiterate here. Other than that I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo so so so so proud of it and I love it so much.

The Voice In My Earpiece Thinks You're An Idiot (Jo/Bela) JoBela heist fic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“If anyone touches you again, I will cut off their fingers.” The fierce darkness of the promise plunges into Bela’s stomach, like a punch. Nobody has ever made her a promise like that before. Not one she believed, anyway.  “Do you believe me?” “That would -” Bela clears her throat, finding her voice croaky - “That would blow our cover.” “I don’t care.”  She means it. Bela remembers what Jo said when they properly introduced themselves - “I make a promise, I keep it.”. Stupid, it is, to throw away their plans over a few moments of discomfort. Ridiculous. Childish. “Do you believe me?” Jo repeats, and Bela nods, jerky, unpracticed. “Yes.” She takes a breath, then says again, “Yes.”

They get the biggest quote because theyyy mean so much to meeeee. I'll probably do another cawis commentary on this at some point bc there are too many things I did on purpose to say them all here. For now: when the woman who's learned to never trust anyone comes to trust the woman who's never felt trusted. And they banter and have hot lesbian sex. ROMANCE.

In Case of Emergency S1 Faith!Dean gets a new roommate at the hospital who's weird and intense and unexplainable things happen to him at night. I wonder who it could beeeee surely no one who's significant to Dean!!! (It's S5 Cas when he did the angel banishing sigil on his own chest) One of the machines on the other side starts going crazy with noise just as the curtain is cast back in a dramatic swish. The shadow of a man looms, sinister and ominously silent. He's watching Dean, but Dean can't do the same, his face impossible to make out. A red light flashes off kilter to his head from his monitors, and Dean gets the absurd thought that it looks like a knocked off halo. 

You know it you love it it's In Case Of Emergency. I just think. They DON'T have a supernatural soulmate connection but they just get on as people. If they met at any time in each other's lives for the very first time (aside from Godstiel lol) they would end up getting along! They click! They LIKE each other!

I thought a lot about the Sam role in this fic. If you have 3 people and 2 of them want something (to hang out all the time) then the 3rd person SHOULD be getting in the way of that (closing the curtain) for a believable reason (Dean needs to rest and stop tiring himself out with this random stranger!!!). Sam comparing Dean's imminent demise to Mary's death and Dean eventually asking what he'd want Mary to say to him (with the subtext; what can I say to make it better that I'm dying) made me cry as I wrote it and every time I reread it. It's making me cry NOW lol. augh fuck im rereading i'm crying. turns out. when you write exactly what touches you emotionally. you feel touched. emotionally. to read it.

Also this fic now makes me think of darling @forestofsprites bc they've left such wonderfully kind tags every time they've reblogged it :') ily

Misc I dunno. These don't fit in the other categories lol.

6th Life's The Charm! Sarah Blake/Bela Meow!!!!! Sarah gets a mysterious commission to find a painting, and a strangely perceptive cat follows her home the same day. But those can't possibly be connected I'm sure. Smiling with her eyes closed, Sarah puts a hand on B's back and touches. Skin.  She startles awake and jerks her hand away. By the embers of the fire, she can see the woman lying on top of her....The woman is watching her, smiling, and her pupils are strange. They creep a little too far into her irises. She's also the most beautiful woman Sarah has ever seen. Stunning, in both senses of the word.  "No questions?" The woman asks eventually, as Sarah's silent stare ticks on. Her tone is a) British and b) faintly mocking, like she knows something Sarah doesn't. 

Little turned into a kitty cat romcom!! I do fun little asides in footnote format! Middle aged yaoi ummmm but what about middle aged YURI??? Sarah references Sex in the City and is having a midlife crisis what more do you want from me!!! I did want to have a little moment of Sarah saying "sorry about the collar attempt" and Bela flirtily going "hmm, I think it'd look better on you" and Sarah spontaneously combusting but it didn't quite flow. Maybe in the horny sequel I kinda want to write...

MEOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hello, Sun In My Face Cas realises he's in love with Dean. The natural thing to do is to tell him right away. "Don't," Dean pleads, and it's not clear whether he means don't love me or don't tell me. Either way, Cas is going to let him down.  "I love you," Cas repeats, firmly, "I have loved you. I will love you. That's all."

Too angsty for the fluff section, too sweet for the tragedies. What are you. As may be clear from previous works, in MY world, Dean and Cas platonically sleep together every night and snuggle the whole time :3 even if it's a world where they're aromantic I firmly believe this would be the case. When I say platonic I am not saying it with a wink and a nudge, as a few scattered comments seem to suggest they think. But also in this one they are also romantically in love haha.

How Do You Go From Wanting To Having? When Cas stumbles back to life after escaping from the Empty, Dean can't speak the words in his heart. But he can write them. You can have it, and variations thereupon: You can have it, damn it; could have fucking taken me, asshole; what do you think is supposed to make me happy now, you arrogant, stupid son of a bitch?

I don't know if I made the most of this premise lol but I had fun building the evidence of grief into the Bunker. They pushed a heavy object in front of the door to the dungeon so they didn't have to see it, Dean filled his room with lights so he didn't have to be in the dark (a general post-canon headcanon of mine that both Dean and Cas have lamps on all night), Dean's stiff position during his nightmare. Little clues that Cas does NOT pick up on bless his heart.

This Is A Love That Lasts Forever It's about Claire giving Cas a haircut. It's about grief. It's about love. Cas remembers - though he shouldn't, ethically - sending Claire for a time out for saying the word 'damn' when she was 6, though she surely couldn't have known what it meant. Swinging her hand on the way to church on Sundays. Clapping for her awkward turn at playing Mary in the Christmas Nativity. Loving Claire had only deepened Jimmy's love of God, and this was the love that Castiel had taken advantage of. He doesn't deserve even a moment of Claire’s forgiveness. 

Last one! I uploaded this on the 29th of December but it ISSSSSS absolutely 1000% one of my best. Cas and Claire's relationship in canon is so WEIRD. One doesn't typically accept grumpy cats from the guy wearing your dad's corpse as a skin suit??? Even if he's kind of nice to you?? So this is my way of figuring out how to make it make sense. She can't ditch Cas because that's where all her dad's love is stored and nobody else in her life knows her dad anymore. And they both have to try and make that work.

I had a different ending in mind for a little while - Claire completing the haircut and then going oh my god. now you don't look like my dad anymore. what have I done now I won't remember him I'm so stupid!!! put it back how it was!! and Cas is like um I can't do that though I'm low on Grace and Claire cries herself out about it and they talk about having to get used to new, unfamiliar circumstances. But I like what I went with more (obviously. because I wrote it lol).

Little headcanons that I carried across from other works: - Claire will allow Donna to be as cutesy and affectionate as she likes and Donna calls her "Claire-bear" and nobody can figure out why it's a shy little happy smile when Donna pats her cheek and beams at her and she would kill anyone else who tried it with her laser eyes. I do though, I know why. It's bc of Donna's easy open affection that genuinely isn't trying to hide anything. Claire knows Donna isn't faking it because Donna is kind to everything and everyone. She would have a harder time with Garth though even though Donna and Garth are very similar in this regard, just because. Well. The girl has been traumatized and betrayed by so many "nice" men. God how did I get onto this. Donna is the mom/aunty figure Claire has needed for a long time. I talk about this in Growing A New Half Soul - Angel's were never children I talk about in A Light Above Descending.

THE END.

If you've read this. Are you sure you didn't have anything better to do with your time avhsbv but thank you!!! Go follow all the friends I've @'d because then they might do follower events and I might write more things as a result!!!! Also go and write some dean walking in on cas masturbating fic and then send it to me.

My challenge for you is to think about women falling in love with other women. Wow, beautiful, right? And also to think of ONE thing you did that you are proud of this year. Even and in fact especially if it's something you're not "supposed" to be proud of. Did you find something new you liked. Were you kind to someone. Were you kind to yourself when you didn't have to be. All these and more are things to take pride in.

I, for one, am proud of having written 111,227 words of complete short fiction!!!!! So much so that I wrote another 4936 words talking about them here :)

[naivesilver]

RIGHT. hello again. I am once again in your inbox :) how about 'would you stop with the worry - flurry?' or 'i care cause it’s not fair!' or 'oh , sweetie , what’s wrong?' from the EAH ask for Cedar? 🥰

HI I AM VERY LATE but. You know. Gretel duty called AHSKDGASKHDKGNADSC thank you, I hope you'll be able to forgive me 💗💗💗 also, I did try to come up with some ACTUAL EAH content, but the urge was too strong, so have a little Uncle Wick and Baby Cedar snippet again LMAO

Ever After High Quote Starters

"Oh, sweetie, what’s wrong?"

People made of wood can't cry, so Cedar really isn't crying, no siree.

What she is doing, instead, is kicking the underside of her bed with her foot, so the thumping noise will drown the yelling coming from downstairs. She hasn't been very successful thus far - her father and grandfather are louder even than the obnoxious clacking of wood against wood, and keep getting worse as they go - but Cedar is determined to continue, if only for lack of anything better to do; she can't get tired, and she's scared of what might happen if she leaves the room, so kicking it is, for now.

Besides, she feels kind of safe, laying on the floor under the bed, as though she were being kept in a neat little box. There'll be some dust flakes clinging to her hair when she crawls out, maybe, but it's not like she gets allergies, and no one will think to look for her there, not until they've calmed down a bit.

Or at least, that's what she thought. The creaking of the door opening makes her freeze, her leg dropping as the two men's row gets louder for a moment before it's shut out again - Cedar would hold her breath if she had any, but as it is, she can only wait, wide-eyed, as a pair of legs approach the bed heavily and kneel down to check underneath.

That's when Uncle Wick's thin, long face pops into view, smiling broadly at her. "Hello, pretty girl. Mind if I join you?"

"No." It's the truth. Of course it's the truth. Cedar is always happy to see Uncle Wick. It's just that she wishes it were Dad instead, because it would mean that the fight is over and she can leave her hiding spot for good.

Still, Grandfather says she shouldn't look a gifted Pegasus in the mouth, so she simply watches as her father's best friend lays on his back and wriggles to fir next to her - he's fairy tall, Uncle Wick, which means his long legs are probably poking out from under the bed in a very silly way, but Cedar isn't really in the mood for laughing, right now. She reprises her kicking, instead, eyes fixed stubbornly on the bed-frame.

A hand comes up to rub at her head, mussing her curly hair. "What's wrong, sweetpea? They shout at you too?"

"No. They just said I should go to my room." Which is much, much worse, in her opinion. "But they're talking 'bout Raven. Raven is my friend. Why can't I listen too?"

"I don't know, kiddo. They told me to get out too." Uncle Wick sighs heavily, his voice growing wistful.

"Look, they're gonna tire themselves out at some point, okay? That's how it always goes. No clue what old Milton told them, but they can't be mad at him forever."

The problem is, Cedar isn't so sure they're mad at Headmaster Grimm and not, say, each other. She wasn't allowed to hear much of what they were saying, but she caught enough to worry - Raven's name came up, and her mother's, and something Grandfather had done, and then off she was, pressing her hands against her ears in an useless attempt to ignore them all.

She's supposed to go to this headmaster's school with Raven when she's older, so she can follow her destiny and become a real girl. Are they going to quarrel so loudly, too, when it's time? Is that why she was sent away, so they don't start fighting too soon? It doesn't make sense.

And what does the Evil Queen have to do with it, anyway? She's dead. Cedar and Raven were supposed to be playing in the workshop while their fathers talked about what would happen after, but they got distracted enough, what with all those somber, whispering adults. "Nothing bad's happened to Raven, right?"

"Course not, Cedar. She's doing just fine. Bet you can go visit her during the weekend, if you ask your dad."

That's something, at least. And yet, the relief is short-lived, for a moment later Pinocchio's voice raises even louder and angrier, so different from his customary soft tones. "Listen, I don't know what Grimm asked you to do, but don't tell me it's something good, because I won't hexing believe you, Father-"

Cedar shifts her position subtly, curling around the man's arm with an ear pressed against the sleeve of his jacket. "Can you tell me a story, Uncle Wick?"

"Sure." Uncle Wick sounds like he's smiling. Cedar is grateful for it, even though he must only be doing it to be brave, to keep her calm and distracted - maybe his voice will succeed where her foot failed, droning on and on until she can't hear anything else anymore. "Once upon a time, there was a very clever wooden girl-"

Cedar finds herself smiling back a bit, despite herself. She appreciates the effort, she really does, even if he's being silly. "That's not right. You always say the same thing."

"Yeah, 'cause all the stories I like to tell are true. Anyway, where was I- Once upon a time, there was a beautiful wooden girl, and she was the cleverest girl in all the realm..."

[babyjakes]

tw: traumatic childhood, fucked up family (npd!dad, golden child!brother, scapegoat!me), pet loss, suicidal thoughts, dissociation, just overall this is really heavy but i need to put it somewhere

past 30-ish hours or so for me have been:

drive home to have dinner with family (last minute, dad "forgot" to invite me. nothing's wrong except dad's harassing a food service worker over the phone and mom still likes pro-cop shows and brother is still a little selfish (you know, typical Man Who Lacks Empathy shit). and he's leaving tomorrow and i won't see him for months, and i'll miss him even though he's being momentarily difficult.

play my old piano. momentarily wish i still lived at home, until i remember why i can't ever again.

feel guilty for talking about my life for a few seconds, when the rest of the dinner conversation has been about my brother (per usual.) redirect the focus back to him out of crippling guilt.

sit with him after dinner. don't know whether to laugh or cry when he sends me a trauma instagram reel (themes of "there's something wrong with me", "no one knows how i really feel", hating life, hating growing older.) realize for the first time maybe he thinks and feels these things too, despite him being my opposite in the family system (he's the favorite child, i'm the scapegoat.) empathy grows for him. realization grows (as it has been for months) that in some ways he's my best friend, and the only other person who knows what it was like to be raised in that house. send him a girl/childhood slideshow on tiktok in return. watch as he tries to cover his recognition, his relating to it, his hurt that is more like mine than i ever knew. half-jokingly but mostly genuinely beg him to get therapy.

miss my dog. wonder if it's normal for me to still grieve her like this, a year and a half later.

advocate for my needs in a tiny, insignificant way. immediately feel sick with guilt about it, which lasts for the rest of the night. resist the urge to take it back and let the fawn response do its thing.

leave early. resist the urge to tell each of them that i love them a few extra times, because i love them still. i love them so much it hurts. feel silly walking out the door with "i love you's" still caught in my mouth. tell myself i'm too sentimental and make everything weird.

cry the whole drive home to sun bleached flies and letter to an old poet. think about swerving off the freeway, jokingly at first until it's not anymore. scare myself with how hard i'm crying, how blurry my eyes are from my tears, the things i'm thinking about doing to myself. consider pulling over onto the shoulder. decide not to, telling myself i'd look stupid and pathetic.

suck it up. get it together. remind myself what and who i live for. tell myself out loud that it gets better, even though my words come out more like a plead to god.

drive past the fire station as i near home. momentarily think about turning into the parking lot and telling the firefighters outside taking their break that i'm thinking about killing myself. realize how stupid i'd look. skip the turn and make it home instead.

walk through the door and cat is waiting for me like she always is. sit on the floor in my shoes and dissociate. come back to the feeling of my cat purring against me, even though i can't hear anything.

remove my makeup, wash my face. feel as my body adjusts to being in a safe space in real time. crawl into bed.

sleep through the night, and most of the next day.

(btw please don't worry about me, safety wise i'm okay now; i have crisis management in place and therapy on wednesday lol)

[duskwoodgirl4life]

Chapter 4

The next morning MC woke too find the group chat active, she grabs her phone and takes a look at what's being said.

Lilly: I can't believe the lies MC as been spreading she is out of order

Thomas: Cleo is even involved I saw her in the store yesterday and she tried too tell me that Hannah is in love with Jake

Lilly: MC told me the same thing! They are both out of order

Dan: wtf!! Why the hell are they both saying that about Hannah? Isn't Cleo supposed too be her best friend

Phil: that is fucked up I thought MC was alright but now...

MC: WTF!! if you are all going too talk about me behind my back, at least have the fucking guts too say it too my face. I am done with all your bullshit the only good thing too come out of this is I found Jake I'm sorry I even found Hannah now!!

Jessy: MC!!! Hannah is are friend how can you say such awful things spreading lies like that is just wrong

Lilly: you are way out of line, MC you are not apart of this group anymore

MC: fuck you all!!! And when it finally comes out I have been telling the truth don't come crawling back

MC left the group

Jake was just coming out of the bathroom after having a shower, he saw that MC was upset so he went over too the bed and sat down next too her.

Jake: what's happened?

MC: the group chat as been active now I'm the bad guy in all this, I told them not too come crawling back when the truth comes out.

Jake: you don't need them in your life MC you always have me, does Cleo know yet?

MC: your so sweet Jake, not that I know, I left the group chat I don't want any part of their sick games, I told them the only good thing too come out of all this mess is finding you.

Jake: I love you MC, I'll make us some coffee

MC: I love you Jake, I better tell Cleo what's happened

MC opened up the chat and sent Cleo a message

MC: hey Cleo, if you haven't already you better take a look at the group chat, I can't see what else they are saying as I've left the chat

Cleo: I've just finished reading what's been said, I can't believe them I really thought Hannah was my best friend but I guess I was wrong.

MC: I think we should try and meet up somewhere so we can decide what we are going too do

Cleo: that's a good idea, let me know when and where and I will be there

MC: I will message you later I'm gonna need Jake's help

MC put her phone down just as Jake handed her a cup of coffee, as they sat talking and drinking their coffee Jake's phone buzzed.

Hannah: good morning my sexy hacker I hope you had a good sleep, just wanted too let you know I will be at the lake again today. I really hope you stop by can't wait too get my arms wrapped around your sexy body. Thomas wanted sex again last night my mind just kept thinking of you and how mind-blowing it's going too be. Before I go too the lake I'm picking up something naughty from the sex shop when I sit on it I will think of you my love. Can't wait too finally be with you I love you Jake xxxx

MC: what does it say this time?

Jake: she's getting worse, now she's talking about getting a sex toy, and thinking about me when she uses it.

MC: wtf! She's totally fucking crazy something as too be done

Jake: I don't know what else I can do from dealing with her and working on a deal with the government it's.....

MC: you never told me about that is it a good deal? And don't worry about her I will take care of her for you

Jake: well if everything goes the way it should I will be a free man in the next couple days

MC: Jake that's fantastic news I'm so happy for you

MC couldn't help but wrap her arms around Jake kissing him deep, pulling him down on the bed. Clothes starting flying across the room as things started too heat up between the two.

Later that afternoon MC was sat next too Jake when she phone rang, she picked it up and it was Hannah.

Hannah: you think you can keep me away from my true love? You think you can keep us apart? We are meant too be together

MC: you are completely fucking nuts Hannah if you even think for one second Jake wants too be anywhere near you

Hannah: stop trying too control him and let him see me, I know he feels the same way I do.

MC: no he doesn't, he doesn't care for you in that way and he never will do

Hannah: oh but he will do I know he already does just you wait and see!!

MC hung up slamming her phone down on the desk, she got up and went into the bathroom. Jake got up and went too check on her putting an arm on her shoulder MC rested her head on his. They both held each other for a while before getting up from the floor.

[firefox710]

This is a recollection of an actual abuse event. This is not an invitation to tell me your fucked up fantasy about my abuse. Normally that'd be cool. But here I really just need to process.

TW: Incest, beastiality, p3do shit. Just...it's recollection of an actual rape from my childhood. Please becareful reading.

I'm sitting playing video games when daddy gets home from work. He comes home followed closely by his friends. He sits in his chair and his one friend sets a case of beer and a case of peach wine coolers on the floor. The TV quickly gets turned off, and I am told to sit quietly on the floor.

Mommy is quick to respond, setting up TV trays, and serving dinner to Daddy and his friends. His one friend, a woman, starts petting my head softly, "you're such a good girl, such a dumb girl." She grabs a wine cooler and forces my mouth open, dumping the drink down my throat, I gag and choke, but it tastes good. She hands me another, " see if you can drink this one yourself mutt." She asks mommy to get her a bowl, she takes the bottle back from me as she pours the drink into a makes me drink it like a dog. I quickly lap it up, while I can feel everyone's eyes on me. As I finish I see everyone else eating. I crawl over to Daddy, "Sir? May I eat? I'm very hungry." Daddy laughs and kicks me over onto my back. He sits on my Chest. It hurts so bad because I'm so much smaller then him. I can't breath. Daddy starts stuffing food into my mouth, "eat up little bitch, you're going to need your strength." He laughs while I choke trying to swallow what he stuffed in my mouth. He motions to one of his friends, and that guy grabs me and starts ripping off my clothes. I can't stop crying as I hear them all laugh at me, I'm scared for what comes next.

That's when I feel a rope wrap around my neck, and I'm pulled backwards and drug to mommy and daddy's room. "Your mom said to stay off her side of the bed." Daddy said as the shock collar went around my neck. I winced as the metal prongs found their spot, it was still tender from last time.

Daddy's lady friend pushed me on my back and looked at Daddy, "She look so delicious, may I have a taste?" Daddy nodded and his lady friend starts eating me out aggressively. While she's doing that daddy's over friend forces me to drink another beer. My heads getting foggy now. And I need to pee. "Daddy I..." I squeak out through moans. Daddy steps on my face, "dogs don't talk stupid mutt, speak like a good dog." It's hard to bark when I can't think. I scream as I feel the shock collar go off. "I SAID BARK." Daddy says loudly. I start crying harder as I force out a half hearted bark. "Not good enough" another shock goes through my neck and I scream out again. He nods at his lady friend who shoved 3 fingers into my ass without warning. I scream loudly and lose control of my bladder. "What a disgusting skank she pissed on me!" Daddy's lady friend is furious. Daddy shrugs. "You can discipline her if you want." She smiles holding her hand out for the shock collar remote. She shocks me on the highest setting 6 times before biting my clit as hard as she can. I scream and feel sick to my stomach. I look down and see blood pooling below me. Daddy's lady friend stands up, before Daddy takes his place between my legs and his friend positions himself at my face aggressively shoving his dick down my throat, it tastes and smelled horrible like spoiled food. I can't move, I can't fight. I gag hard around the dick in my mouth as Daddy shoves his cock Into my ass. It seems like it takes forever for them to finish. When they do I relax. I'm in so much pain but I survived its over. Or so I thought. Daddy throws me off the bed onto the floor. "Wait here there's someone else who wants a turn" Daddy whistles and our dog comes running in. I look at the dog, my best friend, and at Daddy in a panic. "What? He loves you, ya know? He wants you to make him feel good too." I try to crawl away but I'm to tired, to broken, too drunk. Daddy grabs me, "Don't worry, we want you to have fun too and it doesn't seem your drunk enough. Maybe something a little stronger." He goes to his gun safe and opens it. He pulls out a bottle of small white pills. "These will take to long to kick in if you just take them, so come here and bend over." He shoved the pill up my ass before shoving me back to the floor and taking another swig of his beer. It didn't take much time til I felt dizzy and sick. I try to stand up but keep falling over. Daddy laughs and pulls me up, bending me over the edge of the bed tying my hands to the posts so I can't stand up or get away. I feel the dog sniffing at me. I start crying again. "I'm sorry,I'll be good I'm sorry please daddy." I beg. The dog mounts me and rams into my ass at an alarming rate. I start vomiting and choking as a cry. It hurts to bad. "Stop stop stop." I try scream but my words are slurred and all I hear is laughter which turns to cheers as the dog knots me. "What a stupid fucking mutt." The dog eventually gets off me, and Daddy unties me. I fall to the floor unable to even stand up. Daddy laughs and throws me in his tub in the master bathroom. "Try not to puke everywhere mutt. Well be back in a little." He chuckles as he turns off the light and leaves me there. I try to stay awake. I feel like I'm dying. I try to fight the sleepiness but I just can't. And the world goes black.