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#can't watch any of the interviews. can't watch his interviews
lokideservesahug · 1 day
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Bordering Professional
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Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Ferrari/ Future Team Principal!reader
Notes: For some reason, my thoughts are consumed by Charles Leclerc and Ferrari/ Future team principal!reader (+a moodboard)
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Charles Leclerc meeting his future team principal... Or so the rumours say. Fred Vasseur is good but this rising star is better. You're not only extremely talented and overwhelmingly intelligent, but you're also incredibly captivating. Cameras have caught drivers stopping to catch glimpses multiple times. From Lewis readily talking to you whenever you visit the paddock (in what he claims is getting to know his future team better) to the time Max faltered for a moment in his post qualifying interviews as he caught sight of you in that outfit that accentuated your features all to well. You're captivating and everyone knows it.
You know the effect you have on many. And if it isn't your brains or beauty turning heads, your family name certainly is. Being one of the last to carry the Ferrari name is certainly a burden but you pay it no mind. People can't even complain about nepotism when you help the team so much and half of the paddock follows you around like lost puppies. Making life much easier for all.
Charles finds it quite professionalism quote infuriating (when it doesn't get him going, not that he'll admit that). Your sheer refusal to blur any lines with him or anyone else in the paddock is infuriating but keeps a small part of him happy, knowing that he doesn't have any competition or at the very least it's all equal.
You're there in Monaco when he gets the win. All bright smiles and Italian praises thrown at him. But they all blur into insignificance when you kiss him on the cheek. It's a quick peck. Nothing more. But gosh does it send him reeling. Charles wants nothing more in that moment than to swoop you into his arms and kiss you senseless. He's brought back to reality by the feeling of Fred engulfing him in a hug and he tries to rationalise his thoughts. "It's just the adrenaline" he tells himself.
He never thought a moment could top that. And whilst he doesn't want to compare two of the most joyous moments in his life, Monza 2024 is certainly up there with Monaco.
He wins. In front of what many would call his second home crowd. He wins in front of the Italians, the Tifosi but most importantly, you. Your professionalism bleeds into all aspects of your life. You don't show much emotion unless you need to, most people can count the times they've seen you smile even the slightest on one hand. Yet he's met by another one of your big grins. And as he realises two of the happiest moments of his life also being you a lot of joy, Charles can't help but fall more and more in love with you. You give him a tight hug and whisper "Well done Charlie." To which he just grins. He takes in your feautures, trying his hardest to commit this moment to memory. He almost swears he can see tears in your eyes as well but he's pulled away before he can come to a definite conclusion.
That night he stays a bit later, wanting to soak up the last bits of energy at the track before he hits the streets of Monza. He finds you and does something that he'd only dreamed off. He kisses you in an adrenaline filled haze, desperate to show his appreciation and affection for you. Charles didn't think far ahead, but as the kiss goes on, he's surprised that you didn't pull away and hit him. After a few more moments you both pull away. He expects to be lectured about how unprofessional it was, about how it ruins the both of your careers and images. But instead he's just met with a quick peck (the same type as the one you gave him at Monza) but this time on the lips. His eyes widen as you chuckle slightly and turn on your heel. "Well done Il Predestinato. See you in Baku."
And as he watches you walk off, Charles' suspicions are confirmed. He knows he shouldn't, you're probably his future boss and at the very least you're his co-worker. Heck your family surname is surrounding him, his suit is brandishing the logo of the company you'll one day inherit.... But Charles doesn't care. He just knows that he's completely and irrevocably in love with you.
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Sorry for how random this was... Also I tries my hardest to make it gender neutral. Idk where this came from or why but I hope you like it...
And please send any asks if you want to, or want me to elaborate on this...
Taglist: @nikfigueiredo @mysoulispainted @leclercings @d3kstar @hiireadstuff @a-beaverhausen @nichmeddar @lozzamez3 @stinkyjax @marymustdie @littlesatanicassholebitch @mehrmonga @insanedeathwish @ems-alexandra @a-disturbing-self-reflection @cherry-piee @thatgirlmj
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simpjaes · 2 days
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i feel like a stalker reader fic with a plot twist of sunghoon being a stalker even before reader was obsessed with him (kind of like a mastermind where he plotted how and when they would meet first) AND A FREAKY ONE AT THAT is only a fic that you could possibly write
and you're right about that bc i do believe i'd slay that shit if I ever got around to it.
a/n: this was meant to just be a thought but i got a lil lost in it lmfao.
Like, the idea of Sunghoon being obsessed with you since fuckin' senior year of high school because he transferred there. He was vulnerable when he transferred due to home life stuff forcing the move, and he had close to no one save for a dad who was never home. You were the first person to say hello to him and that singular greeting made him grow attached.
and he'd like, watch week after week. sometimes you'd greet him in passing but never really approach him or anything. he would be too far attached already to approach you himself too, because he feels socially awkward. he is socially awkward. No one back at home liked him much either so his confidence isn't quite high enough to peruse you.
anyway, shoot to college. maybe....he's been like...yknow....doing his research on you since he transferred back in highschool. maybe he's doing the same degree path as you.....maybe he did some snooping to land in the same university, taking the same classes....at the same times as you.........
he's grown very smart about this tho bc like, you'd never second guess why you're always seeing that handsome guy everywhere. maybe you guys are just more alike than you could have thought. and you wouldn't grow your own little crush turned obsession until he you noticed how he ignored you.
you never saw him glance or stare. he'd brush you off any time you try to greet him, he'd always speak in class with confidence, making you feel like he's...very very very intelligent. and it's like, woah, he acts so different compared to high school. you're into him kinda....there's nothing wrong with a lil crush right?
lil crush turns HUGE crush when he ends up at all the same parties you attend. always lurking in a corner by himself looking handsome and untouchable, sometimes with other girls approaching him. these are the moments you'd catch his drunken eyes on you from time to time. Or maybe he's just catching you staring. you're not sure of yourself anymore by this point.
still he wouldn't make any moves or efforts to talk to you. little crush turns to big crush. big crush turns to you wanting to learn more about him...and learning more about him turns to you consistently checking in on his social medias that he rarely updates....asking about him around campus when you manage to land in a room where he isn't, hoping he shows up to more parties..etc.
you wouldn't realize the stalker behavior you're exhibiting til it was too late. he'd be all too fond of it though, knowing he's managed to catch your attention by giving you none at all. what a needy little doll.
It's not until you dead ass find out where he works part time and you're filling out your own application before you realize that maybe you're going a bit too far. when he ends up being there during your interview though, you're a bit too blinded by wanting to know more about him to think too hard about it.
and so, the two of you are working together, going to classes together, attending parties together...except separate. and it's driving you up a fucking wall because surely it's because he has a girlfriend right? but you never see her. you can't find any trace of someone he's with on social media. never on campus, at work, no where. so, lets say you guys end up at a party again and you really do lose it.
lots of alcohol in your system, sunghoon looming in a corner, side eyeing pretty girls who stare at him. you'd be the one staring the most, walking up to him while forgetting how to breathe, only realizing you might actually be in love with him when you try to reach for his shoulder with a brain so empty you forgot what you wanted to say. "Hm?" he'd hum at you with a raised, unbothered brow. His skin prickling at the way your shaking hand grabs at him. He calms himself through it though, having jerked off enough to the mere thought of these hands on him nightly since he met you. He knows how to calm down now. "I'm like, in love with you, maybe." You'd slur out, stupidly with an embarrassed but hopeful expression. Sunghoon's unbothered demeanor wouldn't change, but the setting would. He'd take your hand and guide you without a word, outside, into his car, and he wouldn't say a anything to you through it until he'd driven and parked somewhere entirely secluded. [He's sober btw, you make him drunk enough.] "Do you even know how much I want you?" He'd mumble so quietly you wouldn't be able to hear him over the thumping of your heart, but you stare at him, watching his lips move as he tries to speak. You watch him the whole time, feeling safe in this secluded spot with a man you've grown obsessed with. Your body reacts and moves on instinct as he sits there. You can't fucking stand being so close yet so far from him. "I don't know what you're saying to me." You'd mumble and slur out to him, far too drunk than you originally thought now that there is no loud and booming music to drown your thoughts out. "You never do." He frowns, leaning towards you and practically pinning you to your seat by energy alone. His entire body feels like it's on fire, cock twitching, heart jumping. "You want me?" You nod, breathing softly and deeply as you look at him. Of course you want him. "How bad?" He follows up. "As badly as I've wanted you?" You nod again. "You sure?" Another nod.
His eyes go vacant now as he stares at you, adjusting his body on top of yours in the cramped space of his car. You feel his nose nuzzle against your neck as he inhales deeply. He groans slightly at the scent, never able to smell you so fully except for in passing. This alone could satisfy him for life if he wanted it to. "Show me then." He nearly demands, wanting you to be the one to prove all of his work to get to this point is truly coming to fruition. Wanting you to make all of the first moves. Wanting you to do it all for him.
And, well...you do.
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saffusthings · 2 days
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Baby I Can Feel Your Halo
oscar piastri x personal assistant! reader
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summary: the one where the world gets to become familiar with a new name: Y/N L/N. word count: 8.4k warnings: awkwardness, my attempt and poetic writing, poor understanding of how film and media works, Lando as a bit of a side character, poorly edited writing a/n: i can't tell whether this is half decent or nonsensical. inspired by That Viral Interview. i have a soft spot for this part of the story, so i hope you guys are able to like it too.
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3
She’s going to kill him.
Clicking her phone on to check the time for the umpteenth time as if it will make this stupid elevator go any faster, she lets out a huff. The tapping of her shoe acts as a placebo, perhaps. Or maybe this elevator is actually getting slower-
When the metal gates finally part, she bolts. As gracefully as one can, she awkwardly half-run, half power walks past the hall of doors until she reaches Room 307.
She doesn’t even pretend to knock. Glancing at her phone one more time - 27 calls - she slips a plastic card from the lanyard around her neck. When it beeps, flashing green, the door opens with a click, allowing her to storm in.
To her credit, she at least waits for the door to close before she yells.
“Oscar Jack Piastri!”
Oscar wakes to a fire. Or at least that’s what he has to assume is happening, considering someone is screaming his name at full volume. Eyelids barely open, he immediately sits up in bed. “M’awake! Jesus, give me a second,” he mumbles, trying to rub the sleep from his eyes.
Tossing him his pants that had been hanging in his closet, she goes around, picking up any stray items. “Put some pants on,” she grumbles. “C’mon get up, we’re already-”
“-running late,” he says defeatedly, eyes landing on the bedside alarm clock. 
When he finally steps out of the bathroom, his brows are scrunched in confusion. She’s typing something on her phone, and definitely not trying not to look at him.
It’s been over a week since their almost-kiss in her office. She’s no rookie, she’s been more than professional since, knowing she can’t risk this. But a small part of her can’t help but think of how close his lips had been to her anytime she’s standing close enough to smell his familiar cologne. 
She’s interrupted from her thoughts by the sound of Oscar’s voice, her thumb still hovering over her phone from her long forgotten text.
Trying to get the swoop of his hair to land in some sane looking way, he gestures to the pine green spread out for him on the bed, the one she insisted he wear. “You sure about this?”
He watches her as she knits her eyebrows together as she gives him the once over. “Yes. You look good in green,” she explains, still entirely absorbed in sending an e-mail to their media liaison.
It’s only once he’s finally dressed that she gets up and gives him a look over. Her lips purse before she motions for him to stand closer. “C’mere.”
She aligns the seams that are supposed to trace along his shoulder, before using her hands to smooth out any wrinkles in the soft fabric. She stands back for a moment, before coming closer again, and pulling his sleeves up just a bit in a way that exposes some of his forearm. Assessing it one more, and seeming content with how it looks, before doing the same to his other sleeve.
Entirely unaware of the chaos his cardiovascular system seems to be undergoing, she gives him one last look over, and wipes a bit of excess moisturizer that had been left on his nose.
“There we go,” she says with a small smile. 
Grabbing her things, she stands at the door before looking back for him. “Ready?”
“Yeah,” he says slowly, patting his pockets and searching the hastily made bed. “Just…”
“Good to go,” he announces, swiping his phone off the bedside table, and tucking into his pocket before following her into the hall. “Where are we headed?”
“They’ve set up in one of the conference rooms near the swimming pool” she says from over her shoulder as they make their way down. “It’s some Australian channel looking to do a segment on their hometown hero, so it should be a safe set. Of course, if they veer off course, let me know and I’ll take care of it. ”
“Will you be there? Or are you headed back to the office?” Oscar asks. His tone makes it difficult to differentiate whether he's nervous, wary, or doesn’t want her to be there, but he hopes she understands anyway. 
“Yep,” she replies, smiling. Oscar wonders why his chest feels warm. 
“That’s my job, remember?” 
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When he gets to hair and make-up, he can’t help but feel more than a little lost. Not because of the makeup, certainly - god knows Hattie has tested more than enough ‘smokey eyes’ on him - but rather because when he sits in the chair, the woman immediately asks what kind of look he wants to go for.
Huh?
He looks over to Y/N with desperate eyes. 
Help me, please.
She’s quick to walk over and greet Lindsay, his stylist for today, with a warm smile. Once she’s sure that the stylist is okay with taking recommendations, the rest of it comes easily.
“We’ll wanna do some powder to counter the glare from the studio lights,’ she suggests, glancing at the woman for approval. Tilting Oscar’s face, the two women survey him analytically.
“It’s up to you if you want to add a little warmth, but no blush or color corrector or anything like that. And then his hair looks good like this, so we don’t need to do anything there. How does that sound?”
The elder woman nods in agreement before pointing at different parts of Oscar’s face and mumbling somethings to Y/N who nods along thoughtfully. 
Finally, he’s left at the mercy of his stylist, as Y/N walks away.
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Once the mic checks are complete and the people behind the large lights give the go ahead, one of the employees counts off the seconds before the cameras start recording.
Oscar spends those seconds looking over to wherever she is. She’s stood by one of the people carrying a large white panel, watching on to make sure everything runs smoothly. They’ve done this dance probably dozens of times, but the buzzing lessens once he assures himself that she’s still in the vicinity. 
He watches her nod, giving him a reassuring smile, and then, Oscar is ready.
“And cameras are rolling 5… 4… 3… 2… 1.”
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“We’re here now with Oscar Piastri,” the host says with a warm smile, “now in his second year of representing Australia in the highest level of motorsport - Formula One. Thank you so much for joining us, Oscar.”
“Of course, thank you for having me,” Oscar smiles, that polite cat smile that’s become associated with his name. “Just Oscar, is usually fine though,” he jokes, never one to feel too comfortable with high praise. The host laughs good naturedly, “Oh, the boy’s got jokes now, does he?“ Oscar seems to glow in the spotlight. Something about him, even in front of  the cameras, seems to radiate comfort, familiarity. Even on TV, even with his rising stardom, his laidback posture and the crinkle around his eyes when he smiles suggests that he could be the boy next door, that he could be your boy next door. The cameras are not the only thing focused on him. “So Oscar, not sure if you remember, but you did a sit-down with us last year as well.” “Of course. I don’t forget that easily, Mick,” the driver replies easily. “I’m not that old.” “No, no, in fact, you’re quite young aren’t you? Only 23 and already in your second year of Formula 1.” “Yeah, feels a bit strange when you say it like that,” Oscar chuckles, “but yeah. It’s been a bit of a wild ride.” Mickie smiles. “One year closer to retirement, I imagine?”
“God no,” Oscar scoffs, shifting in his seat to get a bit more comfortable. He looks more relaxed this way, more open. “I’m not leaving without a championship, so you’ll be seeing me around for a while. Sorry to disappoint.” Laughing good naturedly, the older man shakes his head. “Far from it. You’re a hometown hero. You’ve got everyone here rooting for you,” he tells him, gesturing to the crew around them.” Smiling gratefully, Oscar nods. “Yeah, I’ve been pretty lucky with all the support. That always makes a difference.” “I’m sure it does. Who would you say are your biggest supporters?” “My parents, for sure. I’m sure there’s a clip of my mom talking about my… let's call them oddities, as a child,” Oscar laughs, referring to his habit of make-believing as a car around the house, or how he wanted car magazines read to him instead of bedtime stories. “If they hadn’t put up with me through that, there’s no way I’d be here now.” It’s clear as day that beneath the thin film of humor, there’s a chasm of sincerity. He really does love his family - always making time to call them during long trips away or even just because. Working on media with Oscar is (usually) pleasant for that same reason - you don’t have to give him PR-written responses or pre-plan his anecdotes to make the audience fall in love with him. He tells the truth, and they can’t help but fall in love all on their own. “I’ve also got other supporters too. Silent supporters, I guess you could call them, since you all don’t see their faces as much. But my sisters, my team, Y/N, the fans - they are the reasons I get to live my dream everyday.” Mickie nods in acknowledgement. “Of course. Though I see we’re name dropping now,” he teases. Oscar looks up at him, mild panic hidden behind his eyes. He’s only just about to adjust his cap - a predetermined signal to Y/N that he needs her to intervene somehow - when Mickie interrupts his train of thought. “You mentioned Y/N as one of your supporters. Could you tell us a bit more about that?” When Oscar looks at the man with the salt and pepper hair, he doesn’t see the usual malice or hunger that many reporters would have if they had been in the same position. Mickie has been good to him and his team in the past - not coming off as a dog with a bone, but instead as an easy conversationalist who happens to be genuinely curious about Oscar and his life. The young driver recovers easily from his momentary scare. “Oh, yeah. Y/N’s definitely one of my greatest supports. I’d tell you all that she works for me, but I think she might poison my coffee if I did that.” The two share a laugh, easing Oscar’s nerves a little. He subtly adjusts his watch instead.
It’s alright, I got it.
From behind the cameras, Y/N takes a small breath of relief. Though she’s pleased the conversation didn’t take a turn for the rumor mill, she’ll still be a little on edge anytime her driver is in the media’s playpen.
“Alright then. Without risking your coffee, what can you tell us then? That’s not a name we’ve heard too often around the paddock.”
“Yeah, I mean. It’s a shame too - she’s supposed to be my assistant, but with how much she’s involved in everything, we might have to come up with a better title for her,” Oscar smiles easily. Mickie gives him a smile, straightening his notecards into a neat stack. “Is that so? Must be high praise, coming from a big-shot like yourself.” The air is pleasant, the conversation flowing naturally. Even as an observer, the scene could almost be mistaken for a casual chat in a living room somewhere. Oscar shakes his head. “Not enough, actually. When I say I wouldn’t be here without her, I mean it literally. If she hadn’t come to my rescue this morning, I’d probably still be in bed!” Mick leans over, laughing. “Glad to see how much you value our time here together, Oscar!” “Even if I did, I value my sleep more,” Oscar deadpans, a sly smile on his face. “I don’t envy her job, not in the slightest.” “Fair enough, fair enough.” The conversation makes its own way from there - Oscar’s goals for this year, what people can expect from the team this season, how the new car has been. 
“So what I’m hearing is that we have a promising season ahead?”
“I mean, every season looks promising at the start really, but yeah, I have a good feeling about this one. Cautiously optimistic, we’ll call it.” “Well I’m sure I’m not the only one when I say that I can’t wait to see what you have in store for us this season, Oscar.” “Wow, no pressure there. Thanks, though.”
The two share a laugh. It’s getting closer to the end of the segment, but with some time remaining. Mickie decides to take the conversation in a different direction. “Now that we’re done with all the shop talk.” he starts. “I was wondering if you could tell us what Formula 1 has been like for you personally. Last time around, during your rookie season, you mentioned that the intensity of the training and the magnitude of the races were some of the things that took some getting used to. Would you say the same is true now, or have you gotten used to it?” Oscar nods, thoughtful. “Yeah, I mean, your rookie season is always an adjustment. It took me some time to get used to that stuff, and I’d say I’m better at it now,” he answers honestly. “But that doesn't mean there aren’t still things I’m learning to get used to.” “What kind of things?” “As you can probably tell, the time zones are one thing,” he laughs, animatedly gesturing to where his eye bags would be. For a second, there’s silence as he’s given a moment to think, before he finally speaks again. “I’d say the people, too.”
“The drivers, the teams, or the fans?” Mick asks curiously. “The fans are pretty great,” he tells him. “But I think I meant like the drivers and their teams?”  Oscar tries to explain. “Like, you have to understand that there’s so many people in this complex machine that is Formula 1. And every single person that’s there, is because they’ve got this insane drive to win - that includes the drivers, of course, but the engineers, and the strategists, and the trainers too.”
“Tell me a bit more about that.”
“I mean, like, even in Formula 2, with Prema, there was a certain level of friendship and camaraderie that gets overshadowed in Formula 1, because of just how competitive everything is,” he explains, gesturing with his hands. “It’s crazy how the drivers flip a switch for lights out or the chequered flag, because that’s what comes with competing at the highest level.”
The host nods, making an effort to understand.
“Would you say it strains relationships then? This sort of… dual personality that you and the other drivers have to have?”
“Honestly. To some degree, I imagine it has to. But that doesn’t mean we can’t be friendly with one another.”
“You’d mentioned earlier this year, in an interview with your company Quadlock, actually, where they asked you if you had any mates on the grid, and you replied with…” Oscar chuckles shyly, recalling the moment. “No friends, only enemies,” he quotes himself. “Exactly,” the older man chuckles. “Would you say the same is true for you now?” “The honest answer would be yes and no.” The man sitting across from Oscar raises an eyebrow at this, intrigued. “When you live in that bubble with people that are, at their core, just as competitive as you are..” he trails off, contemplating how to phrase it. “Let’s just say it has an interesting way of showing you who your friends and your enemies are.”
“And has it?” Mick asks genuinely. “Shown you your friends, I mean?” Oscar takes a breath before replying. “I mean, of course. There’s Lando, y’know - as my teammate, he’s always my greatest competitor but also the only one who can kind of understand where I’m coming from. Logan, also - you know we grew up through the lower Formulas together. He and I have been teammates in the past too, so it’s nice to have an old friend on the grid. Y/N too, y’know - we’re pretty close in age, and she’s really been there for the highs and the lows.”
“We’ve seen you interact with Logan and with Lando, but what would you say your friendship with Y/N is like?”
“I mean, we work together, so a lot of it comes from that,” he shrugs, not wanting to slip up and say the wrong thing. He signed up for the spotlight, but putting his assistant, his friend there without discussing it with her would be unfair.
“We work in tandem, you see - she takes care of everything outside the car, while I take care of everything in it.”
The interviewer hums thoughtfully. “That sounds like a dynamic that requires a lot of trust, I’d say.”
“Maybe, but she hasn’t let me down even once in two years.” For a moment, for a fraction of a second it feels like Oscar’s eyes glance in the direction of where she’s standing with the tech crew, but it must be a trick of her imagination. They’re standing in the shadows, and it’d be a stretch for her to think that he could even see her in the first place. “Not even once.”
“Would you say your friendship complicates this dynamic, or simplifies it?”
“Helps, definitely. Easier to get out of media duties that way,” Oscar jokes. Mickie laughs easily at that, before focusing on the subject once again.
“Really?  You two don’t face any challenges with that? I’d imagine with the other drivers that that boundary is a bit more clear, what with them being your competitors and all.” Oscar lips press together, his tongue subtly running over his lower lip to soothe the pressure. “I think maybe if it were someone else, then it would be. But not with her.“
Looking over to the armchair, he can see that the other man looks surprised. 
“You seem quite confident in saying that.”
“I am,” he says bluntly. Why wouldn’t he be?
“And what inspires that confidence?”
“Just who she is, really, “ Oscar answers with a shrug. On the other side of the room, Y/N waits for a signal that never comes. 
What the hell is he doing? 
This was most definitely not one of the agreed topics for tonight’s show.
“How do you mean?” Mickie can’t help but inquire.
“I mean the obvious thing to say here would be to say that we’re close in age,” Oscar starts, gesturing. “But it really is more than that. I’m lucky to work with an immensely talented team, especially with all the fresh talent McLaren’s brought on board this year.”
“Of course.”
“But as for her in particular…” The blonde seems to think for a minute. “I think, that in order for someone to understand how we work, they’d have to understand how she works,” he muses.
“And how’s that?”
“She’s like the light you need in order to see. With her perspective, her input,  the fundamental way in which she operates - things make sense. She makes things make sense, really - whether that’s logistically, or with the car, and especially with me.”
The words tumble out of his mouth before he can even know what he’s thinking. The tricky thing about this cozy lounge setup that he’s seated in is that, from her,  it looks nothing like the studios and press conferences and media pens that they’re used to. Here, there are no clambering reporters, no flashing cameras, no microphones shoved in his face.
It’s easier to forget that the world is watching.
“It’s a bit unfortunate that the fans watching this don’t get to see her as we do,” he says with a serious expression. “Because it’s hard to describe her personality, or even just her role if you haven’t existed in her orbit. There’s this… this spark that ignites with everything she interacts with.”
Oscar finds himself thinking of everything that happened on the road so far, every step that led them here. All he knows for certain is that his confidence is not unfounded. Sure, things were… less than ideal at the moment, but they’d go back to normal. He knew they would, he was sure of it.
Not so much because Oscar had a plan, but rather because he didn’t know what to do if they didn’t. They’d figure it out - that was their thing, after all.
He’s disturbed from his thoughts by the voice of another.
“A spark?” the older man prompts with a smile.
It’s almost frustrating when the words don’t come fast enough to keep up with his mind.
“When you’re expected to function at the highest levels, there’s a lot of moving parts underneath the shiny cover that no one really tells you about. Y/N has this intuitive sense and this unlearnable skill to take apart the most challenging complexities and put them back together into something wonderful.”
The studio falls silent. 
“She sounds lucky,” Mick offers sincerely.
Oscar laughs dryly. “The way I see it, I’m the lucky one. McLaren certainly is.”
Mickie’s expression is open, leaving the silence available for him to fill.
Oscar, on the other hand, isn’t quite sure how they ended up here. Talking about Y/N wasn’t a preplanned part of the segment, but he doesn’t seem to mind. It’s surprisingly nice to talk about something besides how hot it is in the car or the rabbit food  athletes have to eat or his opinions on the championship standings. 
And it probably doesn’t hurt that talking about her is really quite easy.
“It’s an incredible gift to meet someone who complements each of your strengths and your weaknesses completely. And if that person happens to be someone who can somehow challenge you and support you simultaneously, then there’s nothing more that I need.”
The boom mic edges closer to the stage setup, careful not to enter the cameras’ parameters of visibility. There’s a shift in tone that’s apparent, something curious and authentic that seems to wash across the studio and everyone in it.
“Will we be seeing this dynamic duo in action anytime soon then?” the interviewer asks, charismatically guiding the conversation towards its conclusion.
“I sure hope so. Maybe you guys can finally convince her to do some of those McLaren challenges with us,” Oscar smiles widely, that dorky, lopsided smile of his. “Trust me, I tried, but somehow she won’t let me drive her around for a Hot Lap. Wonder why that is,” he shrugs, before both men share a laugh.
A hand in the dark silently signals for them to wrap up, indicating that the segment must come to an end.
“Well then, Oscar I see we’re being told to wrap,” he smiles, glancing over in the direction of the crew. Both men begin to go to stand up, extending their arms for a friendly handshake.
“Thank you so much for joining us once again. As always, it was a pleasure, and I know I speak for everyone here at Down Under Daily when I say that we can’t wait to see what the future has in store for you.”
Oscar nods, smiling, giving the man a firm handshake. “Thank you.”
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Once the segment wraps up and the overhead lights come back on, the studio buzzes with the hum of activity. Uniformed crew members unpack and disassemble various machines and setups, beginning to clear out the studio. Oscar glances around, but his gaze keeps drifting back to Y/N, who stands a few feet away, chatting with one of the technicians. Her laughter cuts through the noise, bright and genuine, making something warm unfurl in his chest.
“Hey,” he calls out, a casual attempt to draw her attention. When she turns, their eyes lock, and for a moment, the world around them blurs. There’s something in her expression that sends a jolt through him, a flicker of recognition and a hint of something deeper.
“Hey,” she replies, her smile easy but layered, like they’re sharing some inside joke that only they understand. He shifts slightly, suddenly a bit squirmish under her undivided attention.
Not that he gets squirmish, of course. Oscar is the picture of cool and collected.
As her eyes scan him, she notes the slight flush of his skin, the way the muscles of his face are tense ever so slightly. It’s honestly a bit refreshing to see someone who isn’t always unfazed by it all, she thinks. She does her best to offer him a reassuring smile.
“That went well,” she comments, her voice carrying a lightness that contrasts with the tension simmering beneath the surface. It’s the kind of praise that makes him feel seen, but also a bit exposed.
“Thanks. Couldn’t have done it without you,” he responds, his tone sincere. Oscar isn’t one of those fools who thinks the whole orchestra runs around him. Even  if it did, his mother didn’t raise him to be any bit unappreciative to everyone who works behind the scenes for his successes. He knows she’s more than just an assistant; she’s the one who keeps everything in motion, the anchor in the chaos.
Her gaze lingers on him, and for a moment, the air between them thickens. He’s acutely aware of the distance that’s very much there, yet it feels charged, like static before a storm. “I just do what I can,” she says softly, brushing a loose lock of hair behind her ear—an action so simple, yet watching it feels intimate.
Oscar looks away.
The moment stretches, and he senses a shift, a palpable tension that neither of them is ready to address. Memories of their almost-kiss hang between them, unacknowledged yet ever-present. He wonders if she feels it too, this strange blend of familiarity and hesitation.
The silence is uncomfortable in a familiar way, like the awkward pause that occurs when you can’t decide who should speak first. Oscar even opens his mouth to try to say something - though he’s not sure what - Y/N beats him to it.
“How’re you feeling?” she asks, her tone casual, but he detects a deeper curiosity behind her question.
“I guess just… figuring things out,” he replies, glancing down for a moment as he gathers his thoughts. There’s moments in the midst of the whirlwind of fame and fortune where it all truly feels surreal. Young Oscar always aspired to go fast, to push himself to the limit, to win, but this?
The spotlight, the admiration , the respect, the expectations? It was almost overwhelming, a heavy medal hanging around his neck that he’s still not used to wearing. Especially with the number of people that work day and night to give him a fighting chance at making his childhood dreams into reality, there’s no greater expectation than the one Oscar places on himself.
“Trying to get it right still, I suppose.”
“Yeah,” she agrees, nodding, her eyes searching his. There’s an intensity in her gaze that makes his heart race, as if she’s peering into the part of him he keeps to himself. Briefly, he wonders if she can read his thoughts sometimes.
Like on one of those teleprompters they use for broadcasts and award shows.
He wants to say more, to delve into this strange thing swirling between them, but the words feel stuck, caught in a web. The awkwardness between them might as well be a loose screw in his car - keeping him at the edge of his seat as he navigates the clunkiness that replaces the flow he’s used to. “I keep waiting to get used to it, but it never seems to happen,” he says finally, hoping to keep the conversation light.
“True,” she agrees, her smile faint but genuine. “But you manage.”
“Most of the time,” he admits, letting out a soft laugh that feels half-hearted, both playful and tinged with something meaningful. Oscar may have grown into this suave, clever, mature personality that he’s recognized for, but there are times when he still feels like the lanky teen with the acne and the too-short hair that climbed into a Formula car that very first time.
As the crew clears the set, Y/N steps back, her focus shifting to the flurry of activity around them. Oscar feels the space between them widen, the moment suddenly dissipating like a whisk of smoke. He wants to reach out, to anchor her back to him, but the tide of reality keeps them away.
“Ready to head out?” she asks, her voice interrupting the stream 0f his personal thoughts. 
“Yeah,” he replies, an uncharacteristic hesitation slipping into his tone. He can feel the warmth radiating off her, and the longing rises within him, a familiar ache that refuses to fade. He elects to ignore it, in favor of using long strides to catch up with her quick ones to follow her out into the hall.
Oscar steals a glance at Y/N, her profile illuminated by the fluorescent lights, and he wonders what it would be like to bridge that gap. He recalls what it had been like the last time he'd been in such proximity to her - felt the warmth of body, the coolness of her breath, the ghost of her lips. For now, though, he settles into the silence, allowing the moment to hang between them.
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Y/N leans against the small counter in her hotel room, the yellow light from the lamp seeming to warm the place. She stares at her phone, buzzing with a handful of messages, but her mind is tangled in thoughts of today’s interview. Hearing him casually mention her, smiling as he spoke, had left her feeling a mix of pride and confusion.
As she pours herself a cup of hot tea, she replays the almost-kiss in her mind - the way his breath had caught for just a moment. It felt like a line had been crossed, but they hadn’t addressed it. It hung in the air between them like an uninvited guest, and the last thing she wanted was to ruin the good thing they had.
Her phone buzzes again, the sixth time in the last half hour. This time, however, the contact name reads: Oscar. “How’s your evening?”
“Trying to figure out the chaos that is my notes,” she replies, glancing down at loose pages, and spiral books that are splattered across the coffee table.
“You always have chaos in your notes. It’s part of your charm.” His teases, knowing full well that no matter how chaotic her notes were, they were somehow still always loads better than his hurried scrawl.
The tone of the conversation feels light, teasing, friendly - but she’d be lying if she said it didn’t feel like something more—an unspoken understanding that neither of them wants to acknowledge.
“Charm, huh? I prefer to think of it as organized chaos.” She takes a sip of the warm herbal tea, now having cooled down to the temperature of her liking. It’s grounding these little rituals - which reminds her that she still needs to change out of her work clothes, maybe shower and do some skincare…
“Sure, if that makes you feel better,” he replies easily. Even just reading the words, she can practically hear the laughter in his voice. 
A moment later, he decides to add, “I was just about to put something on the TV. You in?”
In a hotel room just a ways down the hall, Oscar’s heart rate increases. What the hell are you doing? He chides himself. He feels stupid - things were already weird, and now he probably just made them even weirder.
Relax, he has to tell himself. This isn’t new - in fact, this is normal. Like before - friends, just relaxing together after a long day of work. Airplane games of monopoly, friday happy hours, movie nights - all of this was perfectly normal. Right?
Thumbs still hovering over her keyboard, she hesitates. The idea of sitting together, sharing popcorn and laughter, sounded nice, but there was the lingering possibility that things would be strange instead.
Instead she types out, “Maybe. What are you watching?”
She could use a night off, after all.
“Something mindless, one of those cable shows they have on this thing. You know, to balance all the brainpower we exert during the week.”
She had to admit, he did make it sound inviting.
“Mindless does sound good. I’ll join you.”Oscar props himself up a bit better, leaning back on his elbow. The smile on his face is lit up by the blue light of his phone screen as he reads her reply. Forcing himself out of the unexpectedly comfortable position he’d evolved into, he gets up, phone in hand, before starting to work to make his hotel room look a tad more presentable.
He was not having a repeat of this morning.
He types out a reply. “Great. I’ll set it up.”
There is a brief pause, and he wonders if he should clear the air, just in case. He really does just want to have a relaxing evening with her - it had been a long time since they last had the chance. Conjuring up some courage, he types out another message to her. “So, about the interview…”
Reading that, Y/N’s heart races. She didn’t want to overanalyze his words, but it was impossible not to. She decides to go for the safe answer. “You did well. Really.” So maybe he was just overthinking it. The praise lifts some of the weight off his chest.
“Thanks. Felt good to share some insights. And the part about you… well, it was true.”
Had he really meant all of it?
There’s a fluttering sensation in her stomach. “Just doing my job.”
“No, really. It means a lot to me. You’ve been here through so much of it.”
The sincerity of his words has her forgetting this tension for a moment, allowing it to slip into the back of her mind. They had a rhythm, a friendship built on shared experiences, but now it felt precarious.
“I just want you to succeed, Oscar,” she tells him, words honest. “That’s all.”
“And you’re doing your part brilliantly. I honestly don’t know what I’d do without you.”
His words hang in the air, thick with unspoken feelings. He’s said those same words a thousand times before, but for some reason, this one makes her heart skip. She shifts her weight, feeling the heat rise to her cheeks. 
“So, movie?” she suggested, wanting to steer the conversation away before she can get too caught up in her own messy thoughts..
“Right. I’ll get it ready.” 
Rustling the duvet to make it appear slightly less misshapen. One of his hands seeks the remote to see what’s on at this time, and tries to pick the most tolerable option. Happy with his choice, he stalk over to the other side of his room, the show in the background acting as welcome background noise.
He then pulls out two packets of microwaveable popcorn from the welcome basket that had greeted him when he checked into the room, popping each of them into the microwave so the snack would be warm by the time she arrived.
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Y/N stands outside the door to Oscar’s hotel room, feeling a mix of anticipation and nerves. Sure, she could use her emergency key card, but she decides that knocking feels less criminal. She knocks, and immediately the door creaks back to reveal his familiar face. His hair is mussed up, loose locks flopping to one side or the other. Her eyes are fogging with sleep, but  the smile he wears is warm and  sweet.
“Hey! Look who made it,” Oscar teases, stepping aside to let her in.
“Thought I’d save you from another night of mediocre cable,” she replied, a playful smile on her lips. 
She hopes it comes less nervous than she feels.
“Trust me, you’re in for a treat. It’s ‘Chef’s Disaster’ tonight. Guaranteed chaos,” he says,  leading her to the couch.
When she glances at the television that’s playing, she finds scenes of various chefs - forgetting ingredients, leaving the stove on too high,  accidentally dropping their dishes.
“Ah, the best kind of TV,” she laughs, settling in beside him. The pair of them end up on opposite sides of a generously-sized, two-seater couch. Her mind begins to whir, trying to figure out if she’s sitting too far, if it’s too late to scoot a bit closer, would that make things weirder? But when she looks over to Oscar, his relaxed figure sprawled across his side of the couch, the knot in her chest loosens a little. She allows herself to get more comfortable, curling up on her seat. Finally breathing a little bit easier, she allows herself to lean back against the cushioning.
The show flickers on, and they immediately fall into a comfortable rhythm. Y/N reaches for the bowl of popcorn he’d prepared, gathering a handful of pieces to then to slip into her mouth.
They watch as the chefs try to organize their chaos into something presentable, laughing as they watch one of the younger contestants put an unseasoned chicken into the oven.
What happened to salt? Pepper? Common sense?
In the darkness of the room, their faces are lit up only by the glow of the changing scenes flickering across the TV screen. With a subtly yawn, Oscar stretches his arms, before one coincidently drapes itself across the back of the couch, right behind Y/N’s shoulders. He can feel how her hair tickles the skin of his forearm, but it only makes him smile. He’d missed this - time together, the two of them. Life had a funny way of making people feel so close and so far all at once.
When she can’t help but giggle at someone who’d forgotten to put the lid on their blending before powering it on, Oscar can’t help but look at her.
Even at this awkward distance, even with her too far to touch - he feels lucky. He’d be happy to stay like this - to only hear her laugh instead of causing it, to watch her smile from the sidelines -  just to get to be in her orbit at all. 
He wonders if the world might stop spinning on its axis if that wasn’t the case.
His certainly would.
“Okay, chef,” Oscar said, nudging her. “What’s your go-to dish?”
Turning to glance at him, she can’t help but smile. Oscar’s smile is contagious like that, she supposes.
She hums, thinking over his question for a moment.
“Honestly? I make a pretty decent chicken alfredo. You’d be impressed,” she replied, a hint of pride in her voice.
“Pasta, huh? Fancy,” he teases, wiggling his eyebrows at her. His heart does a strange fluttery thing when she laughs. “The only thing I can make reliably is scrambled eggs,” he admits, chuckling.
“Hey, scrambled eggs are a classic! Hell, all the eggs I make end up scrambled. But you should branch out,” Y/N says with mock seriousness, raising an eyebrow. “Maybe I should give you cooking lessons sometime.”
“Deal,” he says, his tone shifting slightly. Raising his hands defensively, he adds, “But no promises on the outcome.”
As they watch the chefs struggle with absurd challenges, the initial awkwardness begins to fade. They exchange jokes about the contestants, their laughter echoing off the walls. They laugh until their stomachs hurt, adding in their own commentary until there are tears in their eyes and their cheeks hurt from laughing. “I actually hate you,” she wheezes, throwing her couch cushion at him. “My nonexistent abs hurt, you asshole. Can’t you be a little more considerate?”
He catches her projectile weapon with an exaggerated ‘oof’, defending himself. “I was just providing valuable insights, really.”
The silence that settles thereafter as they try to catch their breaths is comfortable in the way that graceful snowfall is - familiar and calming, peaceful.
“What’s the worst thing you’ve ever cooked?” he asks, turning to her.
Y/N has to hold back a giggle, recalling a memory. She can’t remember how long its been since she was able to let loose like this. “I once tried to make soufflé. I think by the time I was done with it, it fell under the legal definition of what the pros call, ‘hazardous materials.’”
Oscar bursts out laughing, his eyes crinkling at the corners. “That’s a tragedy! You should’ve brought it here as a surprise.”
“I’m sure. Next time, I’ll bring my ‘signature’ dish,” she replied, rolling her eyes playfully.
Tilting her head back, she lets her eyes slip closed for a second just basking in whatever this is. It’s difficult to think of the right word for it, but quite frankly, she doesn’t care. She just wants to bottle it up and keep it with her forever. Just as they start to find that comfortable groove, a sharp knock interrupts them. Immediately, they both lift their head to turn to look in the direction of the offending sound.
“You expecting someone?” Y/N asks, her heart sinking slightly. She tries to push the feeling away. “Who is it?”
“Probably someone who doesn’t know the meaning of ‘do not disturb,’” Oscar grumbles, shaking his head as he gets up to walk over to the door.
He stands up and walks toward the door, leaving Y/N to focus on the flickering screen. But her mind drifted back to the lingering tension between them, their easy banter feeling suddenly fragile.
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She nervously fixes her hair, tucking the loose strands behind her ears. Making sure she looks professional enough - and not like they were sitting a mere centimeter apart - she turns toward the door. Finally, he slides the pin aside, unlocking the door as he pulls it back.
“Who is it?” she asks him quietly.
There’s a pause for a moment, before Lando’s familiar voice calls through. “It’s me,” he replies, and Oscar seems visibly annoyed. Lando peers over Oscar’s shoulder, noting Y/N perched on one of the couches in the room.
Good, both of them were here. That’d make this a bit easier.
“You need to see this,” Lando tells them, careful to keep his tone even. Oscar nods, stepping aside and opening the door wider to allow Lando in.
“Yeah, of course. Come on in,” she replies at the same time, making sure she looks presentable. Hopefully whatever Lando has to say will save her from whatever awkwardness was probably about to ensue.
Lando pushes into the room and instantly notices that the vibe is… something. It’s *very* obvious that he’s interrupted something, but he doesn’t comment on it. 
Interesting. He files the information away for later.
Instead, he holds his phone out in front of him, a news article pulled up on the screen.
“What is it?” Oscar asks, his gaze flickering between Lando and the screen.
Lando points to the small picture in the article, and Oscar’s jaw clenches, the muscle on the side of his face visibly pulled tight. Lando observes his teammate’s reaction, before he looks over to meet Y/N’s eyes. 
“You might want to read this,” he says gently, his voice low. “You’re mentioned in it.”
That doesn’t sound right.
“I- What?”
Lando briefly wonders what the likelihood is that the ground will physically swallow him whole. Or that he might turn invisible. Or anything that means he doesn’t have to explain this.
“I don’t-“ He cuts off, struggling to put his words together, sighing. “I don’t know how they got their information, but some of these details…”
Seeing Lando - normally smiley Lando - looking so painfully neutral despite the anxiety that flashes in his eyes, feels deeply unsettling. Like dark clouds at a wedding or an empty chair at a birthday party, seeing Lando like this feels ominous, wrong.
He hands her the phone, watching her as she takes it and begins to scan the text. Words and letters blend into a blur, her eyes reading through the article - speculation after speculation on her current health status and how she got hurt. It reads less like news and more like pure gossip tabloid rumors. 
There’s an odd sinking in her chest, some muscle winding itself tighter and tighter.
She can’t stop reading it, standing eerily still. Hidden amongst this clear violation of the privacy she’s held sacred for so long are some very specific facts that only Oscar and a select few other people should be able to know and recognize. 
“This is-“ she starts quietly, her breath hitching in her chest.
It’s quiet. “This is bad.”
Her eyes continue to scan the article, and her mouth goes dry. Even when she knows it’s all mostly bullshit, there’s still a part of her that feels a little violated, like there’s suddenly not enough oxygen in the room. This is her life - her past and her trauma put on display. The most traumatic years of her life suddenly available for the whole world to read about. 
She reads it yet another time, uselessly hoping for something to change, for the words to transform or dissipate like the final wisps of a nightmare.
“One has to ask—can you really call it a "dream job" when it lands you in the ER? Y/N L/N is clearly in need of a reality check. Whispers from insiders paint the picture of a young woman entangled in a life of chaos, fueled by impulsive decisions and reckless relationships. Is she simply a victim of her surroundings, or is there a more troubling narrative at play? Recently, Y/N was hospitalized with troubling injuries: extensive bruising and a suspected concussion, allegedly the result of a wild night that spiraled out of control. Sources suggest her aggressive tendencies may have exacerbated the situation, raising alarms about her behavior and its implications for McLaren. As Y/N navigates her tumultuous life, her influence over rising star Oscar Piastri comes into question. McLaren must now confront the uncomfortable truth: her erratic behavior could endanger Piastri’s career and the team’s reputation. The last thing they need is a scandal, especially when they’re striving for excellence on and off the track. The team's efforts to sweep this under the rug hint at deeper issues within their camp. Insiders are growing increasingly concerned that Y/N’s instability could tarnish McLaren’s hard-earned image, especially as rumors circulate. As Y/N begins her recovery, the pressure mounts on McLaren to manage the fallout. Fans and sponsors alike are watching closely, and the stakes couldn’t be higher. Ultimately, the future for Y/N is uncertain. Will she take this opportunity to change her trajectory, or will she continue to spiral, jeopardizing not only her own future but also the stability of McLaren? The racing world waits with bated breath, knowing that every decision could have lasting consequences.”
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Lando’s expression is sympathetic as he watches her pale. Something guilty settles in his gut - he knows he didn’t cause this, but he doesn’t know how to protect her from it either. Lando has always held loyalty so close to his chest - growing up famous at such a young age forces you to learn that lesson quickly.
It's easy, then, to understand why Lando is the way he is. He's known for his friendly personality - his charismatic charm and his easy laugh - but there are a select few which Lando considers his closest friends. Those are people he answers even in the middle of the night, the ones he’d fly across the world to be there for.
But Y/N is standing in front of him like the very ground  has been pulled from beneath her feet and he can’t do a fucking thing. 
“Um, it’s- it’s okay,” she stammers, voice shaky. She tucks her hair behind her ears again, but they were never loose in the first place. A fragile mask of calm slips over her face, a familiar trick she’s performed thousands of times before
“I can take care of this. I- I’ll take care of this.”
Her heart feels like it’s stuttering in her chest but she knows better than to show it. Taking a short breath, she whirls around to make a beeline for her office. She’ll need to make a few calls, send emails to various liaisons and communication personnel, maybe reach out to HR and PR too-
“Hey, hey, stop.” Oscar reaches out and gently wraps his fingers around his bicep, spinning her around gently to face him. His eyes are worried as he searches hers for something true. He’s seen her upset before, but now her face is pale in a way he’s never seen before.
“Oh, right,” she chuckles awkwardly, suddenly remembering. “Lando, your phone.”
She holds the phone with the article displayed on it for Lando to grab, but she eyes the device like it’s very presence is toxic. She chuckles, but the sound is high pitched and forced. “Sorry, almost forgot!”
Lando slowly takes his phone from her, his eyes flickering between his friends for a moment.
“No worries, s’fine,” he says carefully, his eyes not leaving her face. “Are you actually okay?” That’s a stupid question, you idiot.
“Me?” she asks, as if caught off guard. “Yeah, yeah! I’m fine,” she answers, waving him off.
Oscars expression is stern, unconvinced - and he doesn’t bother to hide it.
“You seem a little, uh, upset,” he says delicately, his gaze flitting to her shaking hands. He immediately looks away, not wanting to draw any attention to it. He doesn’t want her to feel exposed.
“No it’s-” horrible, she wants to say. Instead, what comes out is, “It’s okay. I’m just trying to figure out what I need to do, that’s all.”
He hesitates, his brows furrowing at her attempts to downplay what’s happening.
“And your first thought is to go work?” he points out, a small hint of accusation in his tone.
It’s like she doesn’t even hear him.
“I’m going to fix this,” she tells him, giving both of them her most convincing smile, even as the corners of her mouth threaten to twitch downward.
Breathe.
And with that, she sees herself out of the room, already planning each action she needs to set into motion. She’s going to fix this.
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a/n: thank you for reading this far! feedback means a lot to me. your likes, comments, reblogs, asks - that's the only way i can tell if you like the story so pls pls pls! all the feedback!!!
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flownwrong · 2 days
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chaotic ckr c6d squee propaganda (?) post
This, started half a year ago for @ds30below, was initially a general c6d short reviews post but kinda skewed majorly towards CKR's repertoire and wasn't too review-y. So I gave up on making sense and on including the non-CKR works. I don't know who the audience for this is, because I never give basic details for people who don't know about this stuff but say too much for those who do. I giffed what I could and tried to avoid what I know a lot about but haven't actually seen. Here goes.
Frank's Cock (1993)
Not much to say. It's only 8 minutes, it's beautiful and you should see it if you haven't. I won't spoil the subject, but you can likely guess. Watch it, cry a little. Then go watch some more of Mike Hoolboom's stuff, the vimeo link above is from his channel.
Two X-Files episodes (1994 – 1995)
Well, I haven't actually seen X-files since I was about fifteen and watched the like two seasons, and I remember none of it. I rewatched the two early episodes CKR appears in and they were fun. I did not watch the, the movie or whatever where he's doing the evil gay thing. But really, this one is on the list so I can show you this self-indulgent gif of him being Very Long:
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Double Happiness (1994)
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You shouldn't watch this one for CKR. I mean, you absolutely should see him here, looking like he's barely out of his teens and playing up the insecure act and having devastating chemistry with devastatingly beautiful Sandra Oh, but this is not why it's great. And it's really, really great. It's touching and funny and sincere. If you wanna have some feels about complicated family relationships and identity and growing up (at any point in life), you'll find them here.
Curtis's Charm (1995)
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Don't regret watching it, can't recommend. Not gonna lie, I was emotionally affected. But I usually am by things as in-your-face bleak as this. Mostly, it's trying very hard to be smarter than it is, I think.
However: CKR's One Wild Curl is everything to me (see above, on the right. It was, like, actually curly. I was rendered speechless). And like two seconds of Hugh Dillon made me do a double-take, lol. Incredibly weird knowing this was shot like half a year before HCL began shooting. Feels like it must've been a decade earlier.
Hard Core Logo (1996)
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I could make three separate posts about this one, so of course I have no idea what to say.
This one, you should watch for CKR, actually, he's something, but so is every single other aspect of this film. I wouldn't change a thing about it. It hits you like a 16 wheeler. Perfectly cast, unimaginably beautiful, hysterical and melancholy and disgusting and compelling.
Related recs:
A wonderfully fun article/retrospective/interview for its 20th anniversary a while back.
You should also absolutely read Hard Core Roadshow if you enjoyed the film. It's a book documenting the whole thing from conception to release. It touched me for its own sake, not just a backstage glance, full of love for the craft and the people and carrying this tangible bittersweetness about the heightened and fleeting nature of this kind of work.
(here, I feel compelled to include a quote from another c6d-related interview on Slings & Arrows, which I read after the book and went like man, it's really a universal experience isn't it.
Coyne: <...> But I also think, and this is my experience, what we were all experiencing, because we were all talking about our lives, our life in the arts — there’s something very melancholy about doing something you love, because it will never be good enough, it will always break your heart.
McKinney: Or it will be fleeting.
Coyne: It’ll be fleeting. You come together with people you feel passionately connected to and two weeks later they’re tearing down the sets.)
Quotes from the article and the book respectively include:
McDonald: So there was a kind of mutual dependency society with Hugh telling Callum, “Don’t worry, man, I got your back, I’ll tell you how high or low to wear your guitar, I’ll tell you how you should dress, I’ll tell you what you should drink…” and Callum was like, “I’ll tell you what hitting your mark is, I’ll tell you why they pull out fucking tape measures, I’ll tell you why you have to do it again, I’ll tell you about not overlapping dialogue..” and you know they clung to each other, like the other one was gonna fucking save them.
And:
A final gathering at the back of the tour bus with Bruce, Callum, Hugh, Bernie. We listen to the tape of HCL songs, all the way through, one last time. And we belt the words out. Bernie sings loudest, performing for Salerno's camera. Hugh and Callum sit back, looks of sadness. I get the sense that if they could do it, they'd chuck their lives and be Joe Dick and Billy Tallent forever. Callum leans to Bruce and says exactly what everyone else is thinking: "I don't want it to end."
There's much more to both texts than *gestures* the whatever those two had, but it certainly doesn't hurt.
And Xeriscape is the best HCL fic I've read. Granted, I read very few because it's not a source that creates in me a craving for fic. But this one perfectly matches the film's fucked up beauty with its language while also adding a quieter, more fraught layer of humanity that we only get glimpses of in canon and that perfectly fits John. 10/10, would recommend.
Anyway. Watch it. Read it. If you haven't. Otherwise, come scream with meeee! And go reblog my gifs or something. Idk.
Letters From Home (1996)
Mike Hoolboom strikes again, with another short. This goes into the "don't watch it for CKR, watch it because it's great" box. Yes, you will cry.
For Those Who Hunt The Wounded Down (1996)
Another bleak one! It sucked to watch, I mean, on purpose. There were a couple of very effective scenes. I really enjoyed the opening. They say the book is decent too, I haven't checked that out.
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Actually, let's just switch back from coherent thought to undignified staring at his mouth with this one. What the fuck is that cigarette thing. I couldn't help myself.
Last Night (1998)
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These gifs are not representative of the whole movie. There is more happening than CKR kissing or hugging people. He's also doing more than just kissing and hugging. It's all very... impressive.
Guess who's also here again? Sandra Oh! And say hi to Don McKellar, who is an absolute champion for writing/directing/starring. You'll be seeing more of him.
Another one for the "watch it for its own sake" box. Seriously, that late 90s indie stuff is banger after banger. It's so beautiful! Look at those colours! Look at those shots! It's very uneasy and charming and melanchioly and itself in the best way.
Twitch City (1998 – 2000)
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Don McKellar is back to murder you with discomfort! Bruce McDonald lends a hand. Molly Parker is also here. And Daniel McIvor, who'd go on to direct, for example, Wilby Wonderful. It's a party. If you watched some stuff from above (or below) on this list, most faces and names will be familiar to you, tbh (another Hugh Dillon double-take happens).
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If you liked Spaced, you'll love this. You might also love it because it commits to its weirdness with an admirable resolve and is genuinely hilarious. (Honestly, CKR's outfits alone warrant a watch.) The idiosyncrasy is definitely Don McKellar's doing 200%. It couldn't be more different from Last Night, but if you've seen one, you'll recognise the other.
Battlestar Galactica (2003 – 2009)
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I don't think a person should be allowed to look this pretty in the sweaty-and-dying makeup in that light (this sentence probably looks very weird to those not under the CKR magic spell).
I don't know what to say about BSG because I really, really enjoyed early it initially, but by the middle of S2 it got... well, whatever that was. If you know you know, if you don't, still give it a go. You might get invested enough to suffer through it all, as I have been, slowly.
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The unfortunate thing is that CKR got to be there mostly in the "what the fuck" years and not the "wow that's so cool" years. That, as you might be aware, is a pattern with him. But! When he was here, he was so genuinely, wonderfully creepy not in the typecast-baddy way, but in this slow, half-absent way, which really worked. You can also see him tortured a little, as a treat!! <3
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Also, a wild John Pyper-Ferguson appears! If you're looking at him thinking you know him from somewhere but not immediately remembering, you'll figure it out, I believe in you. I was very happy to see him.
Wilby Wonderful (2004)
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Another win for the put CKR in more good shit team!!! Guess who's here again? Sandra Oh! Also, Paul Gross. Don't watch it for him either though haha.
Another one for whoever wants to look at pushing against the weight of others' (or your own) expectations and growing into who you are or reconsidering who you are or finding meaningful connections with others even when you're kind of a mess and they are too.
Not nearly the first time CKR's gotten to play a queer character, but man, this one really is the heart of the in-universe community, and, through that, of the film. A rare chance to see him so far out of the prickly persona! He's just so solid and calm and there for others in this one and, and soft, ough. It's awesome.
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By the way, if any of you have the commentary track or know someone who has, please drop me a line here or on discord (emotionalrisotto), I really wanna hear that.
Supernatural (2005)
I love Supernatural a lot. It was a formative experiences (albeit a very late one) and I owe a lot of my favourite stuff about fandom-ing to the buddies I met through it. I can't believe I'm telling you this (because who hasn't seen it, not because I'm reccing it), but you should really try it if you haven't. It's pretty rad.
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I had no idea who this guy was when I saw that episode (the second ever one!), though. I simply cannot fathom what @nigeltde-fic felt when she first saw it. I think I personally got very lucky she didn't combust on the spot. It would've been unfortunate.
On a sillier note, CKR's character has weird tension with both Sam and Dean in this episode, which is par for the course. I personally think they should've... no, I shan't say it. You can probably imagine.
Californication (2008 – 2013)
I haven't actually seen it, lol (and I suspect I won't enjoy it, but I'm very curious and also CKR looks really really good).
The real reason for this one on the list is to share a fic rec. Really, it's a due South F/K fic featuring Lew Ashby. It's ridiculously hot and very satisfying in its romantic resolution, too (but then, I'm kind of big on selfcest. And consensual voyeurism. And pretend relationships when done like this. And sublimated yearning. Erm.)
Shattered (2010 – 2011)
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I wish this never happened. I badly, badly wish this never happened. I can't turn back time, but I can warn those luckier than me: do not go there. Yes, even for this dude. You'll sleep better not knowing just what it is he was the EP on. And the only important part — the mascara — can be seen above (yes, the show does look that bad, it's not just the gifs).
Just kidding — I watched it, didn't I? You'll have fun hating it! Just prepare for industrial grade cringe, lower your expectations (No, lower. No, still lower than that. And just a bit more.) and you'll have a great time!
Star trek: Discovery (2024)
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Or, as I call it, Star Trek: The Mediocre Show. Discovery S5 was... what it was, but it was a wonderful viewing experience — mostly thanks to the gang (@kittkatk and @feroxargentea especially!)
What a joy it is, to follow a show week by week, yelling and laughing and discussing the whole time. And giffing, too. I was very happy to contribute to the Disco fandom from my own little obsessive corner, and I was glad to see people adoring Rayner, haha.
He's a pretty neat character — very much a stereotype, yes, but with CKR's usual twist of odd vulnerability and weirdness. Also, I loved the ears. I miss the ears. The ears were great.
I even wrote a fic! Although it's not within my usual range to write for canons and universes I don't know well — and back then, I'd only seen S5 of Disco. It was a lot of suffering, and a lot of fun.
Closing thoughts
I'd really love the dude to get a better agent. And possibly better taste, but I realise that's a tougher ask. Seriously, it's been too long since he was in something majorly cool. I'm grateful to him, at least, for not making terrible music on the side. And I still have a lot of his back catalogue to get through, some of it even good, so there will be more insanity. Until then!
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ninyard · 23 hours
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hi nin! could you maybe… possibly… perhaps… elaborate on your thoughts about jeremy giving kevin a praise kink… perchance…
okayokayokay im going to try my very best to answer this one without going into writing something wayyy too long as per usual (i dont think i succeeded) or just writing full blown keremy smut (wish me luck)
SO
kevin is not used to being congratulated or praised for how he plays; the master always has something to critique him on, the ravens aren't exactly fond of compliments, and something about the "son of exy" "one of the best" "unbeatable" comments from the press or the media never feels,, legitimate to him. maybe the first few when he was a kid and doing well on his high school teams or when he started becoming a big name in exy, they were really meaningful to him, but it kind of lost it's novelty after a while. there's only so many "how does it feel to be the best?" comments he can hear before they start to feel almost like an obligation from them to him. these interviewers, these journalists, these commentators; they don't know him. so, the older he gets, the more he feels like his talent isn't really appreciated. he rarely hears a "good game!" from anyone that matters to him. he rarely hears a "you played well!" from someone who can look him in the eyes and truly, truly mean it.
then; maybe it's in his first year with the ravens, and its the first time kevin has played against usc (or, maybe he's younger, and it's the first time he's played on a national level with his high school team, playing against jeremy's high school team, and their friendship starts when he's 16/17 instead of older) and kevin hears it all - kevin day, son of kayleigh day, amazing, talented, brilliant. he smiles and thanks whoever he has to politely, and goes on about his day. meaningless and unimportant formalities that are just that. but he meets jeremy knox, who he's heard rumours about, who the whispers have claimed is one of his biggest competitors in the league, and kevin is,,, taken aback. from the moment he lays eyes on him, he's smiling, shaking hands with people much older than himself without a twitch or a deep breath to calm him down. kevin watches as he turns his back, and how his smile stays wide on his face, more than just a media-trained look into cameras and into the faces of the people more important than himself.
jeremy looks around the court as the two teams are having their warm-up time, until he locks eyes with kevin and his already wide smile gets wider. he practically bounces across the court, and shakes hands with riko first, as riko whispers to kevin in japanese to not let this dumb surfer waste any more of their time. then, he turns to kevin, and takes his hand sincerely into his. he looks him dead in the eyes, shakes his head like he can't believe this is happening, and tells him, "it is an honour to meet you. there's very few people out there that play like you can."
riko is jealous, of course he is, and kevin feels weirdly almost embarrassed by the compliment. he thanks him genuinely and tells him that there's no need to be so kind, but jeremy, with his hand still in his, he says something else like "there's only kind things to say about someone like you," or that it wasn't kind; it was the truth. he tells kevin he's excited to play against him, with an obligatory compliment sent to riko, too, but kevin could tell that it was his one that was genuine.
the game goes on, kevins team wins, they're crossing the court after the game and jeremy takes a second longer with his hand in his again, "that's how exy is meant to be played," his smile is toothy and real, "i've never met anyone as good as you,"
oh, kevin walks off that court trying to hide the blush that covered his cheeks. when they found a way to reach each other afterwards, and they stay in touch, meeting up every once and a while when games and banquets and events allow for it, kevin is almost infatuated with jeremy's kindness. everything that leaves his mouth, every compliment that he says feels so heartfelt and thought-through and real that he feels like he's never heard these praises that he's heard a million times before. and it's not like jeremy is kissing up, either, the compliments are casual and appropriate for the conversations that they have.
but kevin is a teenager with a bare basic understanding of his sexuality and his body in general, and he's really not sure why when jeremy compliments him like this, he feels like that. he's not sure why he feels this twist in his stomach when jeremy texts him after a televised game that he played well, that he did a good job, that he's so good at what he does and so brilliant to watch. to make a long story short, kevin realises he's turned on by being praised because of jeremy, because of how he talks about how kevin plays, how he compliments him in a way he's never been spoken to before. (of course he feels guilt and shame the first time he,, imagines jeremy telling him he did such a good job. but he also feels how it feels to picture him saying that to him. and the times that he thinks of jeremy are the times he remembers, the times he thinks of over, and over, and over, and over and-)
(the other option is another thing im working on right now - when kevin is trying to figure out his sexuality, and finds himself in an experimenting kind of phase, jeremy is the only person he trusts to help him figure it out. jean is there, of course, but he's too,, close to the nest. he's too close to riko. jeremy doesn't even intentionally praise him, but he feels how kevin stills and how the hairs on his arms and the back of his neck stand up when he says that he feels good. jeremy is the one who brings it up sometime afterwards, asking if he wants to be praised, and he has to be the one to explain to kevin what it means - an explanation that becomes a demonstration that becomes a Praise Kink that kevin didn't even know he had)
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lemotmo · 1 day
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Some of the questions that you all get 😅😅. Bless all of you who have to deal with this stuff.
Q. I don't understand why Oliver feels like he can't talk about Tommy/Lou? He's been brought up to him a few times and you can see that he clearly wants to talk about him but won't let himself. It's part of Buck's story. He can and should talk about him. Ryan being present shouldn't have mattered. Tommy is part of Buck's story and Oliver should get to talk about him.
A. Oliver didn't edit his response because Ryan was there. Oliver didn't want or need to talk about Tommy. The Tommy topic has been handled pretty consistently by both Tim and Oliver in recent interviews. They're talking AROUND him instead of ABOUT him. And they both quickly shifted their focus to other things. Tim made it about Eddie, for obvious reasons, and Oliver shifted to talking about how poorly Buck is handling the Gerard situation because I think that's what's ultimately going to lead to them parting ways. That's clearly a deliberate choice. They're not talking about him because there's nothing to say. He isn't the point of anything happening within the storyline. They have to talk around him because the plot point that Tommy was serving has not yet been resolved on screen. But I'm guessing his part is finished and closed by the end of episode 2 at the latest. If he was sticking around for any length of time both Oliver and Tim could have said that we would see their relationship continue to grow. That's a very simple answer to give. It doesn't require any additional details but would at least let the audience know that their relationship was going to get some kind of focus. Instead they both just said it was still at the early stages and no real time has passed from last season to this season. Then Oliver flat out said they don't yet know what a relationship 'could or would' look like. But Ryan telling the interviewer that Buck and Eddie will be leaning on each other is the biggest tell. If the Tommy relationship was a priority of any kind they would be having Buck lean on him not Eddie.
I think the golf photos we saw are a Buck/Eddie/Tommy outing and they just happen to run into Gerard. If that is the case then that scene is going to be used exactly like all of Tommy's scenes last season were used. To highlight the difference in the way Eddie and Tommy talk to, listen to, react to and regard Buck. If the Eddie story is going where most people, including many jurnos, now think it is they need Tommy out of the way fairly quickly and the Gerard plot is the easiest way to do that. And, in spite of what his fans are currently shouting, makes perfect sense given Tommy's canon history. He's going to tell Buck to keep his mouth shut, his head down and ignore everything. Buck is not going to be capable of doing that, this is something you all would know if you had bothered to watch any of Buck's history. Even if the golf thing turns out to be something different I still think Gerard will be the reason they split. If Buddie is the plan, and that looks increasingly likely, they need Eddie and Buck in some kind of story position before Christopher returns. Given everything that has happened between Eddie and Christopher he's not going to want to keep secrets from him. So even if they aren't ready for Buddie yet they need Eddie in position to open up to Christopher about what's changed for him while he's been away. They don't have time or frankly need to drag out the Tommy part. They need that plot point closed to move forward with the bigger story.
Thank you Nonny! As always, I appreciate you dropping these asks in my inbox.
This post kinda speaks for itself, doesn't it. All of this makes perfect sense when we step back and look at all the things that have been said about BT, Buck and Eddie so far.
Whether or not the Gerrard-situation will lead to their break up, I do expect a break up to occur pretty early on as well. It will be used to propel Buck's story forward, while simultaniously influencing Eddie's story as well.
As for the details? Pffff... who knows? We'll just have to tune in, watch and hope they'll do this story justice. 🤞🤞🤞
IMPORTANT! Please don't repost this ask and/or a link that leads straight to my Tumblr account on Twitter or any other social media. Thank you!
Heads up! For anyone who is giving me the shifty eyes for reposting Ali's updates instead of reblogging. Read this.
Remember, no hate in comments, reblogs or inboxes. Let's keep it civil and respectful. Thank you.
If you are interested in more of Ali’s posts, you can find all of her posts so far under the tag: anonymous blog I love.
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fruitgummies01 · 2 days
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So I managed to get time tonight to see Jung Kook's 'I Am Still' documentary, and I have many thoughts lol.
Spoiler Free Review
JK is so ridiculously talented. I'm sure it was already obvious. but seeing him in the studio, recording his first album, was amazing. He has such a unique ear for music, and it was impressive to hear him in the studio with his English-speaking producers in the U.S. JK repeatedly talked about how nervous he was whenever he was doing something new, and the astounding thing is you could never tell. His nervousness never showed. He was always delivering at such a high level, that you could never tell in any of his performances. Hearing his luscious vocals and tone in surround sound in a loud theater was worth the price of admission alone.
Spoiler Filled Review Below
There's honestly not too much to spoil. If you watched many of JK's performances during his promo run, you probably have already seen like 80% of the documentary. The TSX performance in Times Square, GMA, Global Citizens Festival, the Golden Live on Stage Showcase, and one of the performances he did in the UK were all highlighted. It's crazy that JK was sick through so much of his promo run. One of the only times he mentioned in the documentary that he was feeling in good condition was for the TSX performance. It was also very obvious how much JK's staff loves him. The fact that they were always taking care of him and asking how he slept, and would cheer if he slept well was sweet.
The behind-the-scenes of Jung Kook recording Standing Next to You, going to the doctor before his GMA performance, and the cutting of his hair all felt like the most significant scenes to me that were actually new. JK recording SNTY really showcased his genius as a musically gifted artist. I mentioned this earlier in my spoiler-free section but JK has a remarkable ear for music, and the fact he could hear a note sung by a producer, immediately knew what they wanted and how to sing it, and deliver it back despite the language barrier was insane. Even though JK was too humble to admit it in the documentary, he 1000% is a musical genius with an innate natural ability that can't be taught.
In terms of appearances by other members, there was not much. While rehearsing Permission to Dance for Global Citizen Festival (I think lol) JK mentioned that Jin and Jimin drive him crazy because of how high their parts are in the song, and that fact he had to sing their parts 😅. He visited Barnes and Noble and saw all the members albums. Tae made a suuuuuper awkward appearance while JK was recording lol. JK's one-arm sideways half hug (with his other hand still in his pocket) made me laugh. Next, Jimin. I have no idea if JK had any input on how the documentary was put together, but Jimin making an appearance at the very end, being one of the last things included, actually felt so meaningful. JK had just buzzed off the rest of his hair, had finished recording Never Let Go, and went to find Jimin. Seeing Jimin's full body reaction to seeing JK's hair for the first time felt equal parts funny and emotional. JK leaned into Jimin as Jimin rubbed his head and then asked him how it looked, like he needed his encouragement at that moment. I thought it was really touching. The scene with Jimin and the scene with his barber/hairstylist who cried after cutting JK's hair felt like two of the most personal scenes in the film that didn't have to do with JK as the artist, but with Jung Kook the person.
This leads me to a few of my issues. While I loved it, I did at times find myself wishing it was a little more personal. A lot of time was spent on interviews with his English-speaking producers who worked on Golden and their thoughts, but thankfully PDogg and Son Sung Deuk were also included to add some much-needed insight into Jung Kook as a person. (I don't want to get flamed for mentioning it, but I really hated seeing Scooter appear, but thankfully he remained in the background during Seven's recording.) The jumping around in time didn't really work for me either, but maybe it's because I was crazy locked in during that time and know the exact order in which his performances happened lol. I also wonder why they didn't include more rehearsal or practice dance footage. They included sooo many full performances from Golden Live on Stage and so much hard work and preparation had to have gone into pulling that off, so it was a little surprising not to see much behind-the-scenes content from it. Or maybe BigHit is saving that footage to use at a later time, which would be very like them lol.
Overall, I would HIGHLY recommend everyone watch 'I Am Still' to see Jung Kook's genius at work on the big screen!!! For a 1 hour and 33 minute documentary , it was time very well spent. Again thank you again to the anon who messaged me asking for my review, this very very long review is really all your fault haha. 😅
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lunarriviera · 7 hours
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hi hey hello i have started watching a new crime drama and I AM OBSESSED. it's called 雪迷宫 or, for some reason, The First Shot, although it should be more properly Snow Maze. it's a period piece set in 1997 and it's produced by ZHANG YIMOU which must be why the production values are actually good??? anyway i am here to tell you all about it and why you should be watching it okay here we go
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first of all there's a big hot dumb cop, zhang bei. yes that's huang jingyu and you might not like him because of his apparently quite sketchy personal life but all i care about in this case is that he's tall, and thoughtful, and a police captain who's protective of his people and a little bit of an idiot. my catnip tbh. (i guess he was in addicted too? somehow breaking the you-can-only-be-in-one-BL rule?)
(ETA that by "dumb" of course he's not dumb at all, only by comparison; cf. my own stupid meta on this fascinating topic)
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then there's an effete genius consultant, gu yiran (wang ziqi), who knows everything there is to know about drugs. he comes from the south to help these ignorant northerners form an anti-narcotics unit. he's such a massive nerd, the team doesn't like him until they realize that he runs 10k every morning and can outrun motorcycles and is actually quite useful. then suddenly it's no longer "gu-laoshi" but is all "ran-ge" this and "ran-ge" that. he can't dance for shit. i adore him.
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there's a superb seven-samurai style Assembling The Team sequence in which this cop is brought in as the muscle. Her nickname is mad dog yao and she kicks the ass of an entire club at one point. we love her. her only problem is that, not unlike zhang haixing in tibetan sea flower, she will in fact fight a wall. here's gu yiran's face after a drug dealer mistakenly underestimates her and she stomps on him.
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one of my favorite things about this drama so far is how poor the police are. it's 1997 in a dinky northern precinct and these cops ain't got shit. no computers. rudimentary cellphones. barely any forenic analysis, and most of that is on pieces of paper. no bullpen. no interrogation rooms. they have to interview suspects at their desks.
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captain zhang is so underpaid he can't even afford a real pointer for his situation board, he has to go outside and get a literal stick.
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drives his dad's chicken delivery van. has to slam himself against the front door to open it. everything about this is absolutely perfect.
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i'm only on episode 7 but this shit is already brotastic. please behold:
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yes that is an actual line from the show. yes gu yiran has to live with captain zhang, they can't afford fancy accommodations for him. turns out there's a trundle bed made out of paper clips but that's okay, they still get plenty of cosy domestic time together.
and that's also what i already love about this drama—in spite of being about anti-narcotics, it's also very slice of life, very daily city life, with meals and neighbors and friends and family and did i mention food, there is so much eating in this drama. it's gorgeous. also i'm improving my colloquial chinese by leaps and bounds.
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of course you are you stupid service top, now take care of the baby.
and those are just some of the reasons why you should be watching the first shot, which is funny and suspenseful and unexpectedly brainy and well-cast and has beautiful opening credits. there are 19 episodes on youku's youtube channel right now and the subs are shockingly high quality. i'm hooked, and also so mad at my day job because i can't just binge it, pls join me in this handbasket
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doux-amer · 4 months
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I can't believe I had such a massive headache and my eyes felt swollen all day because of the amount of crying I did this morning through the post-match farewell ceremony. I had to stay offline because everything would set me off, and like a fool, I just went on Instagram, thinking I'd be okay because I watched everything and for the new stuff, I could scroll past them and see them another day. But of course I cried again. The only way I'm getting through this week is because I have an overwhelming amount of work that's going to increase once the work week actually starts.
#i helped my dad plant some veggies and then went for a walk#and felt better and worse afterwards#i haven't felt this level of exhaustion in a very long time#my heart felt heavy and broken all day#and this isn't even me being dramatic lmao. i feel physically wrecked :|#can't watch any of the interviews. can't watch his interviews#i hate ig but god am i happy that he made an ig because i'm not ready to let him go#today cemented it for me that this was the right time for him to leave#last season would've been too early and maybe he could have done a season or two more but i understand#and i AM optimistic and excited for the future. it's like he said change can be a good thing especially if you embrace it#and it'll feel like a fresh start with so many staff and some players leaving#but at the same time i'm not fine whatsoever and this is going to hurt for a long long time#jürgen can you please come back to us? i can't handle this#i just love him dearly. we love him so much#we went from being a miserable bunch to watch to slowly believing#and then believing consistently and unless you were there for that change you don't understand#what that evolution was like. the wonder we felt. i will never ever forget it#and beyond the achievements...it's who he is that makes him special. take away everything and we'd love him anyway#as someone said he's a great manager and even better man and that's saying something because he's very very good#he's one of the best#i'm not as young as trent but jürgen was there as i became a REAL adult#he means the world to me and he means more than i can put into words and more than he'll ever know
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awfydreich · 25 days
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Keep thinking about how the 'half blank, half apocalyptic look' line is so perfect for Armand, but also like how do you even pull that off in practice? And of course Assad just goes and absolutely nails it like there's more than one possession happening here in this cast
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night island's description on AMC's advertising website
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i thought it was a given guys why are you shocked?
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prototypelq · 10 months
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So, I stumbled upon a video about Adi Shankar today (that's the netflix anime exec and showrunner), and I...now feel much, much more positive about the whole thing!
What I've learned, is that Adi is basically El Donte with Vergil-drank-a-whole-Monster levels of hype&energy&perfectionism in tv series industry. The guy is clinically unhinged and deranged, which I think could fit the DMC anime tone nicely.
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He has been making gaming adaptations for a long time now, and his works all come from a genuine love and care for the source material, enhanced with a special Adi TM take on the whole thing. Sadly, I've just learned of his other works, so not exactly best source for this kind of thing, but I got the feeling the guy likes to gore and darken up the source, spice it up with self-irony, and sew everything to skeleton made out of pure-geek love and obsession over the original.
He had a sort of El Donte arc in the industry, as the guy liked to come in shattering doors and expectations of 'normal' executives and investors, but he seems to have matured a little to start combining the best of fan-love and big investor money into amazing and unique works of art. He is most known for working on Castlevania series, but personally the show I learned about (and was sold on to give a watch) is Captain Laserhawk.
Captain Laserhawk is Ubisoft doing a RARE INDEED creative take on their stuff, basically they gave Adi creative freedom over every franchise Ubisoft has ever owed, and a result of that was a.... an adult show which roasts the ever-living hell out of Ubisoft, their practices and everything, with Rayman doing news-anchoring, drugs and then having an existential crisis? Oh, and also for animation he specifically commissioned a studio known for the...furry carnal desire series they uploaded to their own page.
The most bizarre thing is that Adi said he had a Ubi-lawyer follow him to every meeting to confirm that, yes, Ubisoft gave a green light to all of this.
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So, uh, yeah gotta give Captain Laserhawk a watch, I wanna see Ubisoft roasted.
Mind you, Captain Laserhawk was Adi given a free-out-of-jail card on going unhinged, so he did not disappoint. His Castlevania show seems to have been loved by all fans, and seems to be much more tone-according to the series, as far as I can tell. At least, I've heard nothing but praise for that series. Also, knowing japanese studios, I think Capcom was keeping a close watch over everything, still, if Adi's previous work is to go by, then this anime is sure going to be
C R R R A Z Y
Adi claimed to have played all the DMC titles, so he knows his source, and I now believe that those manga in the latest anime preview weren't for show either. We also know the father of the series, Hideaki Itsuno, oversaw the anime production to some extent, so I'm sure it's going to tonally fit DMC. I also wouldn't mind a darker take on this series at all. The anime would be the perfect form to do that, too, as DMC is a world where demon incursions are a frequent occurrence, this HAS to affect the people of this setting somehow. The games can't really tap too much into that either, cause the gameplay of this series is 'bully your opponent back into hell' basically, these games are f u n, and you can't really have fun gameplay and a depressing story, the tone clash wouldn't really work.
DMC5 tried, but it is still mostly a very fun experience, the tragedy of the Qlipoth attack is highlighted only in the beginning, and the game even ends with Nero brightly lit and looking around the ruins, which works for him as a character, but the human tragedy that happened has already been forgotten by that point.
This is not a critique, I wouldn't have DMC any other way, but I DO want additional material that brings the setting down when we exit the 'sparda idiots' radius, and I feel like with Adi at the helm that's exactly what we might get with the anime. Oh, he also claimed to have been working on the anime all this time since 2018, and with his drive and obsession over every project I feel like Adi is not exaggerating, the production of that size and obsession could have very well taken over five years in the oven.
So yeah, I am now feeling much more excited for the whole thing. That's a very nice feeling)
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slowlyvaliantmoon · 5 months
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eegggghhhhhhhhhhhhh
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running-in-the-dark · 8 months
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We definitely need more Thenamesh presidency AU!
Would you write more? Maybe Thena has to do an interview and the interviewer is a bit too friendly and asks her some subtile weird questions and basically undresses her with his eyes? Let Gil step in and protect his girlfriend in the most professional way? 😄
Thank you! Keep up your amazing work! ❤️
"Thank you for joining me, Madam President."
Thena smiled, nodding courteously but quiet thus far. Not only did she have to be careful of every single word she said these days, but she couldn't afford to get tired and run low on energy part way through the possibly lengthy interview.
"The rumours are true," her interviewer smiled, and that was always a dangerous start to a sentence. He tilted his head at her, "you are as beautiful as you are intimidating."
Gil looked up from Thena's schedule in his hand.
Thena tilted her head, though, "is that part of the question."
Eros laughed, "no, you're right it's off the record. Call it an attempt to get to know you?"
"I believe that is what the interview will be for."
Again, Eros took no offense to what would be a dry response to some and a defensive remark to most. He laughed, letting it roll off of him. He was renowned for his good nature, as well as being so young for the field of very serious televised journalism. He was popular with younger viewers for his looks.
They needed this interview to secure the young vote--the key to real, effective positive change.
"Yes ma'am, I am very honoured to have the opportunity, let it be said," Eros sat up a little straighter, almost like a professional interviewing the president. He had a dry kind of tone, his words somewhat running together.
"Your show is quite popular," Thena began her part of the battle (Sersi had advised her not to call it that). She had to meet him toe to toe so he didn't twist anything out of her, nor get the chance to misrepresent anything. "My people were happy to arrange the interview."
Kingo had told her that they had to do well with Eros if they wanted any relevance with young people beyond being known as the era of betrayal.
"Careful not to flatter me, ma'am," Eros continued to schmooze as if they were having drinks at a work conference as opposed to meeting in a secure location for journalistic purposes. He ran a hand through his hair. "I am prone to ego."
"A privilege few can afford."
"I believe you could be afforded anything," he tilted his head, his eyes drifting over her for just a second.
Thena shifted in her chair. Her hands were clasped together, because it was safer than having them loose enough to fidget and betray micro-expressions for her.
Gil cleared his throat off to the side, motioning for things to keep moving for the sake of time. He was frowning.
"So, Madam President," Eros began a proper question as if he hadn't been blatantly flirting with her - the most powerful woman in the country - seconds ago. "You have arrived to a rather precarious position."
Finally the interview began in earnest. Gil drifted around the edges of it, of course asked to keep his presence to a minimum, but permitted to stay in Thena's proximity, as was her security.
A few things were off limits--the direct mention of Ikaris' vacated position, the status of the staff investigations after his betrayal, suspects, that kind of thing. Although the ramifications of such things were technically fair game.
There were two cameras set up strategically on tripods. Eros' show would use edited footage of the interview, which would be subject to their review for security reasons. Gil mostly stayed behind Thena's shoulder, out of the frame, keeping his eyes on the popular show host.
"Now, I would like to ask," Eros looked up from his dossier of questions and points to bring up. He had done so a few times already and every time he did, the tone of the interview would...shift. "And this can be off the record, if you like."
Gil rolled his eyes.
"But it must be said that this is the first time an unmarried woman has come to power as you have." There it was. Gil shook his head faintly, although it seemed Eros was done taking his silent direction. "Does this affect the office you keep, in any way?"
"Why would it?" Thena asked flatly, not only not dignifying his question but also answering the real point of it. "No one in the cabinet minds if I am married or not, only if I can do the job of serving our country."
"So would you say you're on the market?"
Gil snapped Thena's schedule closed, as loudly as he could but not nearly as loudly as he would like. Eros looked up at him; he swiped his hand across his throat, telling him to cut it.
Eros barely acknowledged being told to back off but leaned back in his chair again. Of course doing so gave him another opportunity to run his eyes over Thena.
She was wearing a light grey pantsuit, but the way he was looking at her certainly seemed as if she were half dressed.
"Perhaps we should take five," Eros suggested in a much more - and perhaps falsely - amiable tone. He uncrossed his legs and stood with his dossier in hand. "I am happy to fetch you some water, ma'am."
Gil held out his hand for Thena to hold as she stood. "No outside food or drink--thank you."
The 'thank you' really was an afterthought.
"Of course," Eros nodded, giving his most charming smile. "I shall return in a moment, then."
Security both let him out and followed him as an escort. Such was the requirement of being alone in a room with Madam President herself.
Thena sighed, accepting the water bottle Gil himself was holding, "how long is this?"
"Probably another hour," he chuckled, speaking quietly as they hovered together. "You're doing great so far. You haven't even told him to go fuck himself."
Thena let out a quiet laugh against her hand, but it was certainly real. A few of the security team laughed too (those close enough to them to hear it).
Gil angled his shoulder for her, getting as close as they could afford when not totally alone. Although it didn't stop his eyes from being a little too soft when he looked at her. "Just a little more. I'm right here if you need me."
Thena's eyes weren't much better at keeping their monumental secret. "Thank you, as always."
Gil chuckled, taking the water bottle from her, "you know there's no need."
Her hand brushed against his on the way, "still."
A knock on the door signalled that their guest was back.
Thena sighed but let Gil hold her hand as she sat down again. He leaned down to her ear, "I'm gonna kill him if he asks you about being single again."
Thena laughed, although she couldn't reply. She gave his hand one more little squeeze, prepared to delve back into their work.
"Come in," Gil announced, although he stayed at the edge of Thena's chair. Eros nodded to him as he walked back into the room and to his own seat. Gil kept his eye on him, "limit personal questions going forward."
It was a very straightforward statement, and one that could be expected from her personal attache. No one would necessarily suspect it was her boyfriend telling this clown to stop hitting on her in front of him.
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