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asdfghjklmals · 1 year ago

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LOVE AT FIRST FIGHT✩༶‧˚

GENRE + T/W: sfw, fluff. slowburn. i don't usually go for slowburn, but you have to know oc gojo girlfriend's background if you want to understand oc gojo girlfriend's au... WORD COUNT: 11.2k words. TAGS: satoru gojo x fem!oc, enemies to almost lovers. lovesick!gojo, lovesick!oc. mutual pining.

SYNOPSIS: oc gojo girlfriend has finally convinced her clan to let her attend school in tokyo, but the real reason her clan elders decided to let her go was so that she could meet the one and only, satoru gojo. if you want to skip to see gojo without knowing oc gojo girlfriend's background, he appears at [at the sparring field]. AUTHOR'S NOTE: oc gojo girlfriend was inspired by katara's water bending from ATLA and the main antagonist in the cardcaptor sakura movie, madoushi who controls water and spirit birds in ribbons. i tried to think about how jogo uses fire as a curse to write her abilities. oc gojo girlfriend's clan practices elemental cursed techniques (fire, earth, electricity, etc.) and her brother is named touya (inspired by cardcaptor sakura), and i chose water because i love water as an element. enjoy learning about oc gojo girlfriend and reading how these two idiots met 💚 REMINDER: if you want to imagine yourself in oc gojo girlfriend's character descriptions instead, please do!

intro

"i think having (y/n) (l/n) here in tokyo would be a good idea." masamichi yaga proposed to the principal of kyoto, yoshinobu gakuganji.

"the (l/n) clan has requested that she attend school in kyoto so that she can be close by. they are from osaka." principal gakuganji said. he honestly didn't care whether or not you attended tokyo or kyoto. because your grandparents were part of the jujutsu society group of elders and your family had a lineage of jujutsu sorcerers, you were automatically admitted either way.

"i'll speak with the clan head. it's not every day you get a water and ice cursed technique user from the (l/n) clan with their elemental cursed techniques. i hear this one can be considered a special grade."

the principal was surprised, "you want three special grades in your class? sounds like a handful. you do know that these special grade students will be a lot of responsibility... right?"

"she is the only special grade in her family. the last person in the (l/n) clan to have the element of water was over 400 years ago, just like the gojo clan with the six eyes and limitless. i think satoru and (y/n) would be good partners. maybe they can learn a thing or two from each other." yaga laughed at the thought.

"maybe you can have her reel in that damn satoru gojo while you're at it." principal gakuganji stressed.

satoru gojo was a troublemaker and he was known for defying the elders. he could get away with anything just because of his cursed technique, he was a gojo after all. yaga sighed at that fact, he already knew that satoru was a handful, but he was one of the only people besides shoko ieri and suguru geto that could get through to him. he had hoped that you would be able to relate with satoru since you had similar backgrounds of being "special".

"you can try to convince the (l/n) clan to let her join tokyo. i will not convince them otherwise. to take on three special grades... you're looking forward to your promotion as principal aren't you?" gakuganji teased yaga.

"it's what i've been working on since i became a teacher." the teacher got up from his seat and bid the kyoto principal farewell.

yaga took his phone out of his pocket and dialed a familiar number. it was your brother, touya.

touya was one of yaga's very first students when he started teaching. he was known for his eletric cursed technique and he excelled in close combat fighting. your brother was known as a very powerful grade 1 sorcerer in osaka after graduating from tokyo jujutsu high.

"sensei, to what do i owe the pleasure?" touya laughed as he picked up the phone from his favorite sensei.

yaga started his small talk, "touya, how are you?"

he was going to have to butter him up in order to get him to agree to let you attend school here in tokyo.

"i'm doing great. my sister mentioned that she was going to be attending kyoto jujutsu high school, but i heard that you were still teaching at tokyo."

"that's right. i currently have 3 first year students. do you think she would be interested in training here with your good ol' sensei?"

yaga hoped that touya would take the bait.

"our clan wanted her to stay close to osaka which is why kyoto was the first choice... but knowing my sensei would be her sensei as well and that you have 2 other special grades... that makes me feel reassured," touya rambled. he wanted to make sure that you would be safe at whichever school you attended, "so sensei, tell me about your students."

"shoko ieri, she's studying in the medical field so she can be our in-house doctor. she is a healer who specializes in reversed cursed energy, a natural may i say. suguru geto is one of my special grades and he's able to manipulate cursed spirits. he's very rational and calm. satoru gojo—"

"—oh, the gojo clan," touya interrupted, "i hear the gojo kid is the first in 400 years to hold the six eyes and limitless."

"yes, you're right. which is why i think your sister would fit right in with this year’s class."

"sensei—you know my family has practiced elemental cursed energy for over a thousand years. the last time someone specialized in water and ice was 400 years ago. i wonder if the gojo kid and my little sister are reincarnations of the ancestors from those 400 years. you know that story, right?" touya asked yaga. the history of your clan was not known to many.

"that is exactly why i want (y/n) and satoru to train together."

touya laughed and teased his former sensei, "are you sure you aren't trying to play matchmaker to recreate history?"

"i think (y/n) could teach satoru a thing or two." yaga laughed at the thought of satoru gojo getting his ass handed by a girl.

"i'll talk to my sister and our clan elders. i think having her attend tokyo would be a great idea—send me the admissions paperwork." touya smiled at the thought of you attending his alma mater.

hook, reel, and sink em', masamichi yaga grinned. he just got your admission to tokyo jujutsu high.

osaka, japan

"hey sis!" your brother called out into your clan's dojo.

you continued to do what you were doing, attention never swaying. "what do you want, touya? i'm busy."

you were balancing three ice shards with your cursed technique. touya watched as you focused on multiplying the shards by 3's. 3, 6, 9, 12... you threw the ice shards forward into the circular targets placed ahead of you. you sighed and the ice shattered.

"nicely done—just last year, you could barely summon 6 shards." touya complimented you as he patted your back.

"did you hear back from principal gakuganji if i can attend kyoto jujutsu high?" you asked your brother with a gleam in your eye, you were so excited to finally not be homeschooled. you wanted to get out of your clan's estate. as a matter of fact, you were tired of your clan elders dictating your every move.

"i actually have better news—remember when you used to come visit me in tokyo?"

when touya was a student, you would visit him at tokyo jujutsu high all the time. it was the highlight of your childhood summers.

"yes..." you leered at him, eyes full of suspicion.

"remember my sensei? the one that can make cursed corpses?"

"yes! he was the one that fixed my doll when i was seven!"

"bingo! sensei is still teaching there. he wanted to know if you wanted to be one of his students!" touya said excitedly. he wanted to make sure that your decision was to attend tokyo too.

"tokyo is pretty far from home, touya... do you think the elders would approve? it took me forever to get permission from grandma and grandpa to even attend kyoto." you asked with concern in your voice.

touya just laughed. he never took anything as serious as you. for as long as you could remember, touya was your cool and easygoing older brother. touya was 10 years older than you, and he ended up being like a father figure to you when your parents passed away.

you hoped to be just as strong as your brother someday. for the past 10 years, he had been taking care of you along with your grandparents, training you, and making sure you grew up with a good heart. the clan elders did give him a lot of shit for giving you anything you wanted, but you were automatically spoiled since you were the one that wielded the element of water, the first in 400 years in your clan.

you knew you were strong, and your amount of cursed energy was almost infinite due to water being everywhere. you were even starting to be on par with touya in terms of skill and power at your young age.

"i'm pretty sure the elders can't say no to you. you are their little water princess after all," your brother teased, "—and i'm also 100% confident that your cool and awesome older brother, touya (l/n), is great at getting things his way."

"i hear kyoto is prettier, but if you really think i should go to tokyo, i trust you."

your brother held your hand, squeezing it with reassurance. touya winked at you and said, "alright, lil' sis. we're going to tokyo."

first day at tokyo jujutsu high

touya had spent all morning getting your admissions paperwork ready while you had spent the last three days packing up your stuff.

"ready to go little one?" your brother asked as he carried two large suitcases. you nodded at him and smiled.

you said goodbye to your grandparents and the rest of the clan elders as they saw you and touya off. to your surprise, they let you go to tokyo instead of kyoto. you weren't going to ask touya what he said to convince them, you just went along with it.

when you were only 5 years old, the clan elders started to see glimpses of you playing with water. during dinners and lunches, your water cup would overflow with water whenever the other kids would steal your treats, making you upset. when you had temper tantrums, large pools of water would start to surround you. they even noticed that you could heal yourself and others with reversed cursed energy. it was then that the clan realized that you were a water cursed technique user.

using the technique was extremely rare and it only came around once in a blue moon in your clan. the reason that water was so powerful was because there is always water (or moisture) around. curses form around negative energy, and your cursed energy was so strong because water is involved with negative connotations like drownings, natural disasters like floods and tsunamis, and just the simple fear of water. the cursed energy produced was almost infinite. your technique took a lot of practice to control, especially with the input and output. without control, you could get overwhelmed easily. whenever you overdid it, you felt extreme waves of exhuastion.

"if you're wondering about what i said to convince grandma and gramps, i just told them you'd be training with the gojo kid with the six eyes." touya said.

he knew you were curious about that conversation with the elders, but you wouldn't ask. it was like he could always read your mind.

"the gojo kid?" you laughed, "what do you mean by that?"

touya started his history lesson, "the gojo clan. they hold the most powerful jujutsu in history. their clan sits at the top of the big 3 families."

"i see. and the other families? the zen'nin clan and the kamo clan?"

"correct. the zen'nin clan known for their ten shadows technique and projection technique, as the kamo clan is known for blood manipulation."

you nodded your head as you gazed out of the car window. touya turned to you and said softly, "you, my sweet sister, are a threat to the kamo family. that's why the kamos and our clan do not get along."

touya had explained to you that because you could control water... blood doesn't fall far from the tree. (a/n: blood blending from avatar anyone?!) if you really wanted to, you could manipulate blood, but not in the way the kamo clan does. and blood doesn’t do well when it’s within water as it dissolves easily, making it uncontrollable to most blood manipulation users. a water cursed technique user was like a cheat code against the kamo clan.

400 years ago, your ancestor was killed because they were able to control any person's body due to their blood. they were that strong, which made them a threat and a target. it was believed that a member of the kamo clan had murdered your water wielding ancestor, which is why there was tension between the two clans.

after the 5 hour long car ride, your driver pulled into a forest.

"you probably don't remember because you were so young at the time, but the school is actually hidden by master tengen's barrier." touya said.

"oh, the barrier technique, i sensed it a couple miles back." you said nonchalantly.

"i'm sure you did." touya chuckled. you never failed to surprise him with your keen sense of cursed energy.

touya got out of the car and grabbed your bags and luggage. you walked up to the barrier and raised your palm. 12 ice shards appeared and flew towards master tengen's barrier. the ice shards made a perfect rectangle for you and touya to walk through. as you entered the barrier, the shards dissolved and the barrier closed back up again. you saw two black birds swarming around in the sky.

"looks like mei is watching." touya laughed as he recognized the birds.

mei mei was touya's junior, and she was the best in close combat. touya wanted you to train with her since he knew that close combat was your weakness.

you and your brother walked down the cobblestone pathway towards the entrance to the school. it reminded you of home. you looked around and jumped when you heard a loud voice.

"god damn! touya! is that you?!"

you watched as your brother put your bags down and walked over to the large man. he hugged him and introduced you to the one and only, masamichi yaga.

"sensei, this is my little sister, (y/n)."

yaga turned to you and studied you. you had an immense amount of cursed energy, just about the same as suguru geto and satoru gojo.

"(y/n), welcome to tokyo jujutsu high school," he said while shaking your hand, "i'm masamichi yaga, the head of the first years."

"thank you for having me." you said to him as you bowed respectfully. you followed behind him and touya as they talked about the school facilities. you walked passed classrooms, the sparring field, the dojo, the dining hall, and the shared kitchen.

"this will be your room," yaga said while opening the door to an empty room with nothing but an old bed and dusty desk.

at least it had a nice view of the courtyard.

touya cleared his throat, "i know it's not much, (y/n), but we can move some of your stuff from back home to make it... better—" he was trying to be supportive, he patted your back, "—or, if you want, we can go to shibuya and you can pick out whatever you want to decorate your new room."

you kept your mouth shut as you didn't have anything nice to say about your room. this wasn't the life you were used to. maybe you made the wrong decision about leaving the estate. no—you couldn't go back home. you wanted to experience more in life. you swallowed your pride and nodded with a fake smile.

"next door is shoko ieri's room. she will be your dorm mate. this area is for the girls and the dorms across the hall are for the boys. suguru geto and satoru gojo are in the other hall. those are my first year kids." yaga informed you and touya.

"speaking of the kids, where are they?" touya asked while looking around the dorms.

"i'm sure they're out wreaking havoc somewhere. they're about to get back from a mission, it’s almost lunch time." yaga sighed.

touya turned to you and put his arm around your shoulder, reassuring you. "you're gonna be great, sis."

you faked another smile at him.

"so, sensei. what grade are you giving (y/n)?" touya asked curiously. when he first started at the school, he was already graded as a grade 2 sorcerer.

"the elders and i have already discussed that she would be classified as special grade."

"why? cause i can wipe out towns with floods and control people's blood?" you muttered under your breath.

you knew about the rumors that were spread of you. you were also quite sensitive about the topic of grades. you knew from the start that you'd be a special grade sorcerer. hell, they'd probably give you a white uniform since your powers were still somewhat unstable.

"(y/n)." touya called your name sternly, warning you.

"it's okay, touya." yaga patted his shoulder, "i can explain, (y/n). we grade jujutsu sorcerers on how much cursed energy they can output. not only that, but also on how well they can control their cursed energy. sure, clan influence and their cursed techniques come into play as well."

you listened to your future sensei, but looked out the window at the sparring field, avoiding eye contact with him and your brother.

"touya has told me that you've been working on your cursed technique since you were a child. you're now 17, almost an adult. that's ten plus years of using such powerful cursed energy. if you really wanted to, you could probably beat your brother in a spar and flood our entire field." yaga joked.

touya laughed nervously, "you might be going a little far there, sensei."

you turned to your brother, "what? you don't think i can beat you in a spar?"

your blood started to boil. everyone always treated you as if you were a fragile baby. you didn't think your brother did too—at least not until today.

"(y/n), no one said that." touya said calmly. he didn't want to upset you.

"let's test her on the sparring field." yaga suggested.

touya glanced at him with panic in his eyes and chuckled, "sensei... you're gonna get me killed."

at the sparring field

"you ready lil' sis?" touya called out to you from across the field.

you saw touya hold up his palms upright. you could sense his electric cursed energy running through his fingers. you hated when he would spark you to wake you up in the morning or to get you to behave. you knew it was the least amount of electricity touya would output though. touya could summon thunderstorms and bolts of lightning if he wanted to. his close combat skills paralyzed people and curses, and even his domain expansion was terrifying.

you swirled your hands and 12 shards of ice appeared. the shards floated behind you, ready to dive forward at your command. you focused on touya, you could tell by the way he shifted his body and the way his blood rushed to his palms. touya was going to summon his shikigami, raijin.

raijin was the japanese god of thunder, lightning and storms, and his shikigami was one of touya's techniques. (a/n: this also a pokemon reference to raikou hehe)

you summoned your own shikigami, the spirit birds—two white iridescent birds very similar to mei mei's black crows. if spirit birds were used offensively, they are able to wrap around the target and burn them. you personally liked to use them for spying.

while raijin and your spirit birds kept each other busy, you noticed that touya wasn't in front of you anymore.

damn it.

you let your guard down and you didn't catch that touya had moved.

"boo." touya whispered behind you, attempting to knock you off your feet. you shielded yourself with a large body of water, knocking him back and sending him flying across the field from the water pressure. you threw all 12 ice shards at him.

on his back, touya flipped back on his feet and caught his balance. right before the shards hit his face, he zapped them with his cursed technique. the shards fell to the ground, dissolving into the grass.

touya called out to you, "that was a close one, sis! let's kick it up a notch. domain expansion: electric terrain."

the thing about domain expansions in spars was that you could lay out your domain, but you couldn't attack your opponent with it. this would show who could lay out their domain the fastest, and who had the most refined domain.

touya's domain was a large steel room. you could feel the electricity in the air. you could see and feel static.

you called out your own domain, "domain expansion: iridescent ocean."

the walls of touya’s steel room started to fall as water started to cave in. you knew your domain was much more refined than touya's. as water filled the domain, you saw touya grin. he started swimming towards the bottom of your domain to avoid the blinding lights at the top. if your opponent tried to swim towards the top of your domain, they would be blinded and immobilized, giving you the sure-hit. but if your opponent swam to the bottom, they would surely drown and be crushed by the water pressure.

just as you were about to form more ice shards, a burst of cursed energy cracked your domain from the outside. your domain had collapsed. it sounded like glass shattering as water flooded the sparring field.

you jumped down onto the ground and immediately formed a water barrier around you to protect yourself from whatever just attacked you and touya from the outside.

"somebody’s feisty." an unfamiliar voice stated.

"who the hell are you?!" you asked, "why did you break my domain, you idiot?! i was just about to win!"

you looked up at the boy who just broke your domain. he had tousled, frosty white hair and was wearing black circular sunglasses. just behind his sunglasses, you could see big cerulean blue eyes with long white lashes. he had a lollipop in his mouth. he was actually really cute—wait a minute… why were you thinking about his looks at this very moment?

"who the hell am i? i'm satoru gojo. who are you? and i'm not an idiot!" he retorted, pointing his lollipop at you.

"(y/n) (l/n), meet satoru gojo." yaga interrupted with a sigh.

you scoffed in disbelief, "that's the gojo kid you were talking about, touya? god, what an idiot!"

no one had ever broken your domain before. no one ever attempted to or dared.

"sorry, touya. looks like satoru might have saved you from drowning." the teacher teased his former student.

"sensei, i could sense this crazy cursed energy all the way from shibuya," satoru said sarcastically, "i just had to make sure you were safe."

yaga ignored him and turned to the other student that was with him, "suguru, let's all head to the dining hall and have lunch. i want you to meet your newest classmate."

satoru and suguru looked at each other with wide eyes and then at you. they said out loud in unison, "new classmate?"

your emerald green eyes glared at that stupidly handsome blue eyed idiot named satoru gojo. the classmate next to him, suguru geto, had a man bun and a couple strands of hair in front of his face, framing his jaw. he was smiling at you. it seemed like you're going to have a lot of fun at this school, you thought to yourself sarcastically.

yaga led the way to the dining hall from the sparring field. you walked next to touya as suguru and satoru followed behind you two. you noticed that touya had a cut on his cheek.

"touya, did i cut you?" you asked, surprised that one of your shards actually landed a hit on your brother. he wiped his cheek with the back of his hand. he saw the blood.

"i guess you did, sis." touya chuckled. you hovered your hand next to the cut on your brother's face, a thin layer of water formed on the cut, healing the small wound.

"did she just heal her brother?" satoru whispered to suguru, his hands shoved in his pockets as he walked side by side with his bestfriend.

"seems like it," suguru said while smiling, "she seems very powerful, satoru. that was using a reversed cursed technique."

"i guess," satoru grumbled with dissatisfaction, "not as strong as us though." he playfully punched suguru's arm with his left hand.

satoru was surprised that someone as young as you could also use reversed cursed energy. he was working on honing in on his own reversed cursed technique to be able to heal himself. the only person he knew that could heal was shoko. you looked behind at him and caught his gaze. he quickly adverted his eyes to the ground and shoved his hands back in his pockets.

at the dining hall

"welcome back, losers. lunch is almost ready." shoko called out. yaga cleared his throat as the two boys snickered. shoko didn't realize that you and touya were also present.

"shoko, we have guests for lunch today." yaga announced.

the female sorcerer turned around and blushed, "sorry—uh, we're having sukiyaki beef!"

"shoko, i'd like you to meet your newest classmate and dorm mate. (y/n) (l/n)."

"no way, you're from the (l/n) clan? i thought your family only homeschools in osaka!" she said with excitement. shoko was glad to have a female classmate.

"my brother studied here, so i wanted to follow his footsteps! and i was also getting tired of my clan elders dictating my every move." you said jokingly, your eyes hidden behind your cheeky smile.

satoru stiffened up at your comment and peered over at you and shoko. he wondered if you had the same mindset about the elders as he did. they were just old fashioned geezers to him. he was the type to defy orders and challenge the higher ups. he knew they couldn't do anything to reprimand him because well... he was satoru gojo. being as young as he is, he had some pull being the gojo's family pride, holding the six eyes and coming from the most powerful jujutsu family. he was now curious about your family and what you thought about the higher ups.

"we're going to have so much fun! being the only girl is so exhausting, especially having to deal with gojo and geto." shoko said, rolling her brown eyes. she grabbed your hand and you jumped with excitement, "i've never had a dorm mate before!"

"i guess it's time for a formal introduction," yaga said, clearing his throat, "(y/n), this is suguru geto. suguru is a special grade sorcerer and he can manipulate curses. next to him is satoru gojo from the gojo family. satoru is known for having both limitless and the six eyes, both inherited from his family. and lastly, shoko ieiri. she is studying to be our in-house doctor. these three are my first year students."

touya introduced you to the students, "kids, this is my sister, (y/n). she is the first in the family in 400 years to use a water and ice cursed technique in the (l/n) clan."

suguru smiled at you, "that's amazing—you're just like satoru. he's the first in 400 years to hold both six eyes and limitless."

you and satoru made eye contact, glaring at each other. you sensed some sort of rivalry—no, you weren't even sure what the feeling was. your heart raced as he looked away from you, his cheeks turning a shade of pink.

"come now, let's have lunch." yaga herded everyone to the dining table.

you listened as shoko, suguru, and satoru talked about their last mission and how satoru got injured. he was caught off guard without his infinity. satoru had mentioned that his clan elders wanted him to work on having infinity on at all times, but he would get too tired and stop halfway throughout the day or he would only have it on when he was out on missions.

you wanted to stir up some trouble today and get revenge on the white haired sorcerer that broke your domain. underneath the dining table, you twirled your fingers to control the bowl of miso soup sitting in front of satoru. the soup swished into his lap as he jumped up from his seat. miso soup covering his pants. his infinity was off. you laughed smugly to yourself.

confused, satoru muttered, "what the hell was that?"

you quickly looked back at your plate, pretending to be interested in what your bother and yaga-sensei were talking about. you felt a small jolt of electricity jabbed into your side.

"behave." touya scolded you.

you glared at your brother, rolling your eyes and turned to look back at your new classmates. suguru smiled at you and then at satoru.

"seems like there's finally someone who's able to give satoru gojo a run for his money." suguru laughed. his smile was just like yours, cheeky, and his warm eyes disappeared behind his smile.

satoru peered at his bestfriend, "what do you mean by that?"

"(y/n), are you done eating? let's go back to the dorms! i can help you unpack!" shoko grabbed your hand and dragged you out of the kitchen. she didn't want to be stuck with dish washing duty.

suguru and satoru watched you two run out of the dining hall.

"you do know that (y/n) is the one that spilled the soup on you, right?" suguru teased his bestfriend.

"nah, she can't catch me off guard like that." satoru muttered. there was no way he was bested by some random girl who just joined the school. even though he initially thought you were really cute, there was no chance he'd let someone like you get the best of him.

"i think you're underestimating her." suguru grinned as satoru stuffed his mouth with more rice.

at the girls' dorm

"so what did you do to get on satoru gojo's bad side?" shoko asked you out of the blue.

she was helping you put your clothing into your drawers as you unpacked all your vanity items on your empty desk.

"he got on my bad side," you answered, "he broke my domain expansion when i was sparring with my brother. shoko, i was about to win too."

"i'd like to see you and gojo battle it out on who's domain is stronger." she giggled, "so far, gojo's the best and fastest with laying out his domain.

you changed the subject. you didn't want to talk about the cute blue-eyed sorcerer anymore. he was a pain in your ass already.

"so are all of you the same age?"

"yeah, we're all 17. what about you?"

"i'm 17 too. i'm turning 18 on november 11th!" (a/n: yes, oc gojo girlfriend is a scorpio lol)

"that's coming up soon! we'll have to celebrate! i can't wait to take you to shibuya and shinjuku to show you all our favorite hang out spots!"

satoru and suguru walked down the hallways of the dorms after cleaning the dining hall. satoru could hear yours and shoko's voices down the hall.

he wondered what kind of person you were. he wanted to know what kind of things you liked, what you didn't like, and what were your ticks. he was interested in you. satoru had never wanted to get to know a person more than he did you.

"you should try to be her friend, satoru. she's only here for the same reason we all are." suguru lectured.

"why do you have to be the angel sitting on my shoulder?" gojo asked with a hint of vexation in his tone. "i'll try being nice i guess..."

later that night

earlier shoko had mentioned that if you needed anything or if you were hungry, the dining hall was open for the students at all times. she had retreated to her room for the night as she needed to study for her upcoming medical tests.

your stomach growled. you were hungry again after all the unpacking you did. you looked in the mirror that hung over your door. you were in your pajamas—a green oversized t-shirt and gray shorts. your black hair was in a high messy bun with white ribbons tied into a bow. you put on your slippers and walked down the hallway to the dining hall in search of something to eat.

"what are you doing up this late?"

you jumped at his voice, whispering to yourself, "god, you scared me."

you turned back to the pantry, ignoring him—the cute blue eyed sorcerer. you filled a cup noodle with hot water.

that damn satoru gojo.

he was leaning against the door frame of the dining hall's entrance, arms folded with disappointment in your lack of reaction.

satoru was wearing a white shirt that hung low enough to show off his collarbones and broad shoulders. his gray sweatpants emphasized how tall he was, he must have been more than six feet tall. you noticed that he didn't have his sunglasses on anymore.

"so... you didn't answer my question. what are you doing?"

"i'm hungry." you answered his question with attitude, "what are you? the kitchen police?"

you looked over to see him sitting at the dining table across from where you were standing. his arms were still crossed, fingers drumming on his right bicep. he grinned while he studied you and it made you nervous. you felt like your heart was going to jump out of your chest.

scoffing, satoru chastised you, "you know, if you eat cup noodles this late at night, you're going to wake up with a puffy face."

you held your head high and turned to look away from him, eyes closed. "that's the price i'm willing to pay."

you were about to grab your cup noodle, but satoru was swift and quick. he grabbed your noodles, mixed it up, and took a large bite.

"honestly, i was a little hungry too since someone spilled my soup earlier. thanks for this." he took another large bite as your jaw dropped in disbelief. he was so arrogant—and hot. but you weren't going to say that. he already had an ego.

you rolled your eyes at him and sat down across from him. "so are you ever going to give back my noodles? make your own if you want more."

"sure," satoru passed you back your cup, "the chicken flavor is my favorite. good choice."

you looked at him and then into your cup. there was exactly one bite left. you sighed and kissed your teeth in annoyance. "why are you here? i thought i was on your bad side."

satoru was taken aback, "you're not on my bad side... i just wanted to get to know you more. since were going to be partners and all..."

you put down your cup noodle. there was nothing but broth left now.

"well, what do you want to know about me then?" you questioned him.

"well... what are you hobbies, i guess?"

"i don't really have any." you lied. your brain wasn't thinking straight. you definitely had hobbies. you liked to write, go shopping, and go to coffee shops.

"oh come on—everyone has hobbies."

"okay then, what are your hobbies?" you questioned him back.

"easy. i don't have any hobbies because i can do pretty much anything. i try not to get too involved in things."

he was so full of himself, almost impossible. you looked into his eyes. in this lighting, his eyes were as blue as the ocean.

"what? cat got your tongue? impressed with my amazing skills?" he teased.

you rolled your eyes at him, "so, you think you're perfect then?

grinning, satoru chimed. "you said it, not me."

you got up from your seat to dump the rest of the broth down the sink. you washed your chopsticks and leaned against the counter, looking at him. you studied his body language, he was more open now. he sat down comfortably in the chair across from you, legs spread out, hands behind his head.

"i like you, (y/n). you're actually not too bad."

"what is that supposed to mean?" you felt your cheeks turn red.

no, there was no way he was making you blush right now.

you sat back down in front of him, leaning forward on your elbows, your hands cupping your chin. was this satoru gojo’s idea of flirting?

he ignored you and matched your body language, leaning forward, inches away from your face, asking you another question, "so tell me, (y/n), how was it growing up in osaka with the mighty (l/n) clan?"

you leaned back and broke his gaze, folding your arms and pursing your lips, "it was very... confining." you admitted about your childhood.

"what do you mean?" satoru questioned your answer.

"my family is very overprotective of me because i'm the first water user in 400 years. my brother had to convince my clan elders to let me attend school here."

he kept digging, "i see, how did he convince them?"

"you're so nosy, satoru." you giggled, "he said i'd be training with the gojo kid."

and that was the first time satoru heard you laugh—it was like music to his ears. he wanted to hear you laugh again.

he looked back at you and grinned, teasing you, "i feel like i'm being used."

"anymore questions?"

"yeah, what exactly is your cursed technique?"

"i can heal people and myself. i can shoot out shards of ice. i can use water at different pressures and amounts. i can create a protective shield with water too."

"show me." satoru challenged you.

"give me something that you really like, that you would hate for someone to steal from you." you grinned at him.

you watched him head to the fridge to grab a piece of kikufuku.

"don't drop it... it's my favorite one." he placed the kikufuku in your hand.

you held out your hands towards him, "okay, so now, try to take it from me."

"you're kidding. that's a piece of cake." satoru scoffed at you.

you anticipated his speed as satoru appeared behind you and attempted to grab the kikufuku from your hand. a wall of water blocked him from reaching the sweet treat.

"you can't get past my barrier." you said smugly.

"i can totally get past your water wall, (y/n). i just don't want to right now, i might wreck the dining hall." he laughed.

you looked at him as you backed away from his reach. you drew down your barrier with a wave of your hand. you attempted to give satoru back his kikufuku, but he grabbed your hand and used your fingers to pop the doughy treat into his mouth instead. you gulped, heart racing again.

you changed the subject. "i can heal people too. i heard you got injured on your last mission. can i see?"

"you don't have to do that, (y/n)... shoko can fix me up in the morning."

"satoru, let me show you what 10 years of training looks like." you laughed—and there was your contagious laugh again. there was no way satoru could say no to you. he finished chewing his kikufuku and paused. he eventually took off his shirt to show you his cut on his chest.

"all you had to do was tell me you wanted me to take off my shirt." satoru teased. he laughed while you turned red again. he did have a very nice body—but that was besides the point. you reached your hand out, but stopped short of touching his injury. you couldn't actually touch him.

"so this is the infinity i've heard so much about." you blushed while laughing to yourself.

"whoops, sorry. i'm in the process of training my infinity right now." satoru temporarily let down is infinity to let you touch him. you put your hand on his chest, focusing reversed cursed energy into his wound.

"is this your way of getting to touch me?" satoru continued to poke fun at you.

"maybe."

if you weren't so nervous, you could've sworn you heard his heart racing—or maybe it was just the sound of yours.

water started to surround satoru's wound and it slowly started to heal. once the cut was healed up, you took a deep breath and exhaled. you felt a wave of exhaustion.

satoru looked at you with concern in his eyes, "you used up a lot of cursed energy today, didn't you?"

you thought about the domain expansion you laid out today and all of your techniques you used. you haven't rested at all since you arrived at the school grounds this morning. you did overextend yourself today.

"i guess you can say that."

satoru grabbed your hand to help you get up from your chair. you noticed that he still hadn't turned back on his infinity.

"i guess i have a personal healer now," satoru smiled, "i'm working on using reversed cursed energy to heal myself. i was going to practice that later, but you healed my cut for me. thanks (y/n)."

"you're welcome, satoru… uhm, i should probably get back to my dorm to get some rest." you said shyly. he was making you blush, again.

"oh, uh—i'll walk you back to your room. just to make sure you're okay."

your heart skipped a beat. you waited as satoru put his shirt back on. he walked closely next to you, in fear that you would collapse. his six eyes sensed that your cursed energy was weak at the moment. it was a quiet walk back to the girls' dorm. you stopped in front of your room, hand on your doorknob.

with a smile, you voiced your gratitude, "thanks for walking me back to my room. goodnight, satoru."

"and i don't even get invited in?" he joked.

"maybe next time." you laughed.

satoru grinned, "goodnight, (y/n). hope you have sweet dreams of me."

“so cheesy." you flashed him a smile before shutting your door on him. you stood behind it, collecting your thoughts.

why did satoru gojo make you feel so nervous?

one month later

satoru, shoko, and suguru were spending time studying at the pavilions next to the sparring field. except, satoru didn't do any studying. instead, he was stealing glances at you while you were practicing your close combat with mei mei. suguru noticed that satoru wasn't focused on the open book in front of him.

"so, what do you think about (y/n) so far? she's been at the school for a month now." suguru instigated, knowing exactly what his best friend was thinking about.

shoko looked up from her book, "she's really great. she's smart and she's pretty too. we're planning on going to shibuya to buy stuff for her room today after her sparring practice with mei. it's her birthday soon, so i thought we could do something for her."

suguru added in his two cents, "i agree with you, shoko. we've gone on a couple missions together and i've showed her around the school grounds. she's very nice."

satoru was districted and wasn't listening to either of his best friends, instead, he was watching you.

you looked tired. he saw mei mei pat your back after a grueling spar, the both of you walking back to the community showers. you had been working on your close combat for the past month since you've joined jujutsu high.

"hello? earth to satoru? what do you think about (y/n)?" suguru waved his hands in his bestfriend's face. suguru could sense that satoru felt some type of way about you. he was sure shoko could too.

"i think satoru has a crush on (y/n)." shoko said out loud.

"shut up", satoru grunted trying to avoid the subject, "she's not my type."

"whatever! she totally is!" shoko said, punching his arm.

suguru reminded the white haired sorcerer, "you were the one that wanted to show off how great you are at close combat when yaga-sensei told her she'd be training with mei."

satoru rubbed the spot on his arm where shoko punched him and glared off towards the showers again.

"maybe i'll ask (y/n) on a date!" suguru joked while peering at satoru, testing him.

"no way, suguru. you're not her type either." satoru mumbled.

shoko laughed, "seems like gojo already called dibs."

*************************************

after a brutal close combat session, a hot shower was just what you needed. you blew dry your hair in your bathroom as your phone started to ring.

you answered your phone, "hey shoko!"

"hey (y/n)! yaga-sensei just called me and suguru for a mission, so i can't go to shibuya with you today. so sorry about that.” shoko lied. she was never called on missions, but you didn't need to know that.

"that's okay, we can plan a different day if you want."

"no way! your birthday is coming up! i found a replacement for myself!" shoko said proudly.

"you did? who?"

your dorm mate cackled, "the one and only—satoru gojo!"

your heart skipped a beat at the mention of his name. you were going to spend a whole day in shibuya with satoru gojo? you started to feel nervous again.

it had been almost a month since the incident in the kitchen. you and satoru talked whenever you had the chance and you would hang out with the trio, but you've never actually spent time alone with satoru. shoko and suguru were always there with you.

"alright, shoko. how much did you have to pay him? did you hold a gun to his head?" you joked.

"no! nothing! he actually volunteered to be my stand in!"

you tried not to sound too excited, "oh, that was nice of him, i guess."

"he'll drop by the dorm in a couple minutes to come grab you. have fun! i can't wait to see what you buy. gojo is the perfect shopping partner!"

shoko hung up immediately. you grumbled, "thanks shoko..."

once you hung up, you went to your dresser to pull out a bright green bodycon dress and white boots. you put on your favorite pink iridescent sunglasses and looked at yourself in the mirror. you tied your hair into cute space buns with white ribbons.

four knocks on your dorm room door caught your attention.

"hey (y/n), are you ready?" satoru called out to you, leaning against the doorframe. he made his way into your room. the white haired sorcerer was wearing a black t-shirt, sunglasses, and jeans. he always looked so chic in his casual clothes.

"yeah, i bought tickets for the bullet train!" you rummaged through your purse for the train tickets.

satoru just laughed at you. you cocked your head to the side, confused on why he was laughing. "why are you laughing...?"

"the bullet train? come on, (y/n)."

you were still confused at why he was laughing. the school was located in the outskirts of tokyo. you would have to take a bullet train to get to shibuya.

"do you have everything you need?" satoru peered at you. you grabbed your bag and nodded at him. "grab onto my arm."

you paused, you got nervous again.

"come on, i don't bite." satoru teased.

you reluctantly grabbed his arm. he clasped his hands together and just like that—you two were in the middle of the air in shibuya.

"did you just teleport us?" you were still clinging to his arm, floating in the air.

"yep. just one of my favorite abilities." satoru said, grinning.

"so you can teleport others? or only if they're holding your arm?"

satoru explained, "i can teleport others, but i have to draw a seal on the ground before i do. if i'm going with them, i don't need the seal."

"do you teleport other girls like this?" you teased the six eyes.

satoru gave you his signature shit-eating grin. you tested him and he liked that about you.

you both jumped down to the ground and started walking towards the bustling shibuya streets. you ran ahead of satoru towards the bright lights, loud music, and the shops. everything was calling your name. you were so excited.

"hey (y/n)," satoru called out to you, "by the way... you look nice."

you smiled at the blushing sorcerer, "thanks, satoru."

satoru gojo had never felt this way about a girl, he wanted to change the subject quickly so he wouldn't turn as red as a tomato.

"so, since you wanted to get some stuff for your room, i figured we can stop by muji."

"wow, the satoru gojo is taking me shopping?"

"consider yourself lucky." satoru retorted.

your released your shikigami birds so that they could monitor the area and enjoy themselves. as you and satoru walked together, you could hear whispers of girls talking about how good looking satoru was, questioning if you two were dating. you could hear girls squealing about satoru all throughout the streets. every corner your turned, it was the same reaction.

"do girls always act like this every time you go out?" you turned to ask satoru, annoyance laced in your tone.

"why? you jealous?" satoru asked.

"no, cause you're the one who has hands on me." you pointed out.

satoru didn't even realize his hand had drifted to the small of your back while he was guiding you through the busy crowd. he just laughed. he loved how feisty you were.

he then thought about the time where he was throwing crumpled paper balls at you in class and how you created a small ice shard to throw back at him discreetly. his infinity caught it, of course—but he loved that fire in you.

"i'm not trying to toot my own horn or anything, but yeah." he said, winking at you. he removed his hand from your lower back, opening the door to the shop, "ladies first."

you mouthed "thanks" to him. as you walked into muji, you immediately felt overwhelmed at the large selection of home goods. satoru trailed behind you as you walked towards the bathroom supplies.

"hey, (y/n), i'm gonna stop by a coffee shop, do you want anything?"

you gave him your usual order, "sure, can i get a vanilla latte with soy milk?"

satoru gave you a thumbs up and turned to leave.

you needed bathroom organization items like a toothbrush holder, acrylic drawers, and organizers. you picked up a couple trays and laundry items as well. this muji store was huge compared to the one in osaka. as you walked through the store, satoru found you again. he held your coffee towards you.

"thanks, satoru." you smiled at him again.

satoru felt his heart racing. your smile was adorable to him. your cheekbones became prominent, your eyes disappeared behind your smile.

‘so cheeky.’ satoru thought to himself.

"no problem, what'dya find?" he asked while peering into your basket.

"just a bunch of bathroom stuff. now, time for the bedroom!" you said, marching towards the bedroom area. satoru followed you around obediently and sipped his coffee quietly. he had a cake pop in his other hand.

"you have a sweet tooth, don't you?"

"i actually started eating sweets to stimulate my brain, but i ended up getting a sweet tooth instead." satoru explained.

"what kind of coffee did you get?"

satoru grinned mischievously, "a pumpkin spice latte."

"how basic," you laughed, "—satoru, what do you think about these sheets?"

you held up a light blue and a light green bedsheet set side by side for him to choose between.

"the green one, it matches your eyes." satoru replied with a mumble, avoiding eye contact with you.

you felt your cheeks heat up, "actually, i don't think i need sheets." you laughed nervously and quickly put the bedsheets back, "—i think i'll get some slippers instead."

after about an hour inside the muji store, you and satoru got in line to pay for your items. satoru went first. you watched the way satoru carried himself. you admired how he was so confident in himself and how he walked with his head held high. he really was the pride and joy of the gojo clan.

"welcome back, satoru!" the employee greeted him, "how have you been?"

satoru smiled at the employee, "hey, i've been greet." he paused and turned to look back at you, "can you ring up her items up with mine?"

"sure thing!"

satoru walked back towards you and grabbed your basket from you. you stuttered and called out to him, "wait—satoru, i can pay for those..." your voice trailing off.

he shrugged, "it's your birthday. i'll pay for it. consider it your birthday present."

"you do know my family has money right...?" you chuckled.

"happy birthday, (y/n)." satoru said, putting his arm around your shoulder.

"thanks..." you smiled back at him. you were sure thanking him a lot tonight.

"satoru, is this your girlfriend?" the employee asked as they scanned your items, "you're usually here by yourself."

"oh, no, we're not dat—" you put your hands up in denial as satoru interrupted you, "she's a new student at the high school i attend. we're just friends."

"well... you guys look good together." the shop employee winked at both of you.

you and satoru blushed with sheepish looks on your faces, avoiding eye contact with each other. he took his arm off your shoulder and scratched the back of his head. after what felt like a lifetime, the employee bagged everything up and swiped satoru's black credit card. satoru held your shopping bags while you both walked to the next location.

"so, where to next?" satoru asked you.

"i was thinking we could go get some kikufuku at the place you like." you suggested. you didn't want satoru to be bored hanging out with you, so you decided to do something he would like as well.

"it's near the bullet train station, follow me." he said excitedly.

satoru led the way as you trailed two steps behind him. it was a busy friday night in shibuya. the streets were packed and you could easily get lost. good thing satoru was over six feet tall and looked like a damn model with his white hair and sunglasses. he was easy to spot in these streets.

"satoru, do you always wear sunglasses when you go out?"

"that's a random question." satoru replied, peering behind him to look back at you through his dark sunglasses.

"well... i was just thinking about that night when we talked in the kitchen. i just realized you weren't wearing sunglasses back then."

"why were you thinking about that night?"

"no reason." you said quickly. you couldn't have satoru gojo know that you were thinking about him. he would never let you live it down.

"with the six eyes, i see everything on a heightened level. it makes me tired. the darker the sunglasses, the easier it is on the eyes. sometimes, i wonder if i should just wear a blindfold."

satoru explained that he could still see everything even if his view was obstructed by something opaque.

"so you can see how much cursed energy is around you?"

"i can see every little piece of cursed energy even if my eyes are closed. right now, your cursed energy is bright blue and it feels like it's screaming at me since you're right next to me—and you have a lot of cursed energy. i can also see any residuals of cursed energy even if a curse stepped here a week ago. if a building has cursed energy, i can see where it's located inside the building."

touya never got into the specifics of the gojo clan, you thought it was because he didn't know anyone that had the six eyes. a majority of the gojo clan inherited limitless, but satoru was the first in a long time to have the six eyes which went hand in hand with limitless. touya liked to say that the world shifted when satoru was born.

"you're quiet. still processing?" satoru asked you.

"i didn't realize how complex your clan's technique was. you have the six eyes and limitless..."

"and you have water and ice. (y/n), we're the first in 400 years in our families to change the way—oh, here's the kikufuku stand."

the stall owner recognized satoru right away, he started to package up his usual order.

"oh, wait a minute. can you also package whatever she wants too?" satoru asked, pointing at you.

the stall owner smiled at you and let you pick what you wanted. satoru recommended the matcha cream and an edamame cream one. those were his favorites. you ended up choosing the strawberry and matcha cream ones. you two sat down at a small parlor table and ate your kikufuku, continuing your talk.

"so what elements do your family members have control of?" satoru asked.

you thought about your family, "my brother has electricity. my parents passed away when i was 6, but my brother told me that my dad was one of the strongest with earth. my grandpa is pretty bad ass with fire."

"what happens if you're born without any cursed energy in your clan?"

"nothing, you're still part of the clan. you just don't get to learn any jujutsu, i guess. they are usually teachers, housekeepers, cooks, or assistants at the family minka."

"i see. do you mind me asking what happened to your parents?"

"they were killed," you said quietly, "touya won’t tell me what happened, but i think it has to do with our rival clan."

satoru shifted in his seat, cocking his head to the side. "rival clan?"

"the kamo clan." you said.

gojo related with you, "it's just like the gojo clan and the zen'nin clan. a ten shadows technique user and a limitless six eyes user killed each other in the fight for the aristocracy in the past."

"a member of the kamo clan was rumored to have killed our last water user. i'm not gonna lie, satoru, it does make me a little nervous knowing that." you sheepishly said to him.

"it looks like we have a lot more in common than we thought, (y/n)." satoru said softly, "—and we're friends, right? i'll protect you from the kamo clan."

you smiled at him, "right, we are friends… thanks, satoru. i'll protect you from the zen’nin clan too."

satoru sat back in his seat, legs spread open, and his arm folded across his chest. he tipped back in his chair, balancing on the back two legs, "what do you say we get out of here? ready to go back to jujutsu high?"

you nodded at him as satoru reached out his hand. you looked at him, confused.

"did you forget that we teleported here?" satoru laughed.

you realized he didn't want to hold your hand, he wanted to teleport back to jujutsu high. you reached out to grab his hand as satoru looped your arm under his. he clasped his palms and just like that—you and satoru were back at jujutsu high.

you walked together under the dusk sky, the cobblestone pathway to the school was dimly lit. a warm connection surrounding you and the white haired sorcerer. the invisible red string of fate slowly connecting you two together.

"can you teleport anywhere in the world?" you asked satoru.

"hmmm, as of right now no. i've been practicing my long distance teleportation. shibuya is the furthest i can go since shoko, suguru, and i always go there. and i can teleport back to my clan's estate—i'm working on it though."

you nodded and watched him walk ahead of you. satoru gojo was actually kind of amazing. you walked faster to catch up to him. when you both arrived at the dorms, satoru brought your shopping bags back to your room for you.

"do you want to come in?" you asked him quietly, "curfew doesn't start until 10."

satoru scratched the back of his head nervously, "uh... sure."

this was a different side of satoru than the one that asked ‘no invite?’ a month ago.

"have you ever been in a girl's room before?" you teased the white haired sorcerer.

"oh, so you think you're funny?" satoru quipped back at you. he stepped into your room and dropped your bags on the floor. you could see through the corner of your eye that he was looking at your belongings.

"you like to shop at some of my favorite stores." he mentioned as he picked up your sunglasses, "i like these sunglasses."

"how many pairs of sunglasses do you have? 100?" you joked.

"234."

you looked at satoru. was he serious? what kind of person owned 234 pairs of sunglasses?!

"you're joking."

"nope. you can come into my room and check it out. unless... you've never been inside a guy's room before." satoru winked at you.

you rolled your eyes at him. he started to take out your stuff from the shopping bags, handing you a couple of organizers.

"i don't have anywhere for you to sit besides my vanity chair... you can sit on my bed if you want."

the first week of school, touya had multiple people from the clan estate bring you a custom king sized futon that was identical to the one you had in your room back at home.

"damn, a kind sized bed? must be nice." satoru said sarcastically.

"what size bed do you have in your dorm?" you asked him.

he slyly asked, "wanna come find out?"

"i would rather die than get caught laying in your bed. you probably have diseases in there." you retorted back at him.

"fine then, don't ask to come cuddle with me when you're cold then—and i wash my sheets weekly for your information."

"you have a lame way of flirting, satoru gojo. and it's a good thing i don't get cold easily."

satoru continued to grin as he laid on your bed, putting his arms behind his head. he crossed his legs and watched as you started to organize your bathroom with your birthday gifts from him. he liked pushing your buttons. he wondered if you were into him as much as he was into you. the way that you both bantered with each other excited him. sure, he flirted with and teased other girls, but he didn't feel the same way about them as he did you—you intrigued him.

satoru thought about how nice your hair looked with your white ribbons. you had taken out your space buns and let your long black hair run down your back and chest. you looked so pretty to him in your green dress that emphasized your bright emerald eyes. he shook his head at his intrusive thoughts, he was tired after using his infinity all day.

you noticed satoru had his eyes closed. you were almost done reorganizing your bathroom as you looked over at him again. he was sleeping. you leaned against your bathroom door, admiring him.

you heard a knock on your door. you opened the door to find suguru geto.

"hi, (y/n), is satoru here?" suguru asked with a smile.

you whispered to him, "hi suguru, he's sleeping right now."

"oh, that's surprising. satoru never sleeps anywhere but his room." suguru said while peering into your room, "and on your bed too?"

"my bed is really comfortable." you chuckled, "it's a custom futon from osaka."

"well, if he wakes up, can you let him know that yaga-sensei wants to talk to all of us tomorrow at 8am?"

"sure thing, thanks suguru!"

suguru geto was so nice. he always had a smile on his face. you enjoyed his company whenever yaga-sensei paired you up with him. and all the times you've studied with him, he was patient and kind.

"do you want me to wake satoru up?" you pointed back at the sleeping sorcerer.

"no, it's fine. let him sleep. see you tomorrow morning. goodnight, (y/n)!"

"goodnight, suguru."

as suguru left your room, he thought to himself, "they'll probably start dating soon." he laughed to himself on his way back to the boys' dorm. he knew that satoru would probably try to pull a move on you tonight. suguru was happy that satoru had finally met his match.

you shut your door and looked back at satoru. he had readjusted his body to lay on his side, his right arm under your pillow. you carefully took off his sunglasses from his face and put them on the nightstand beside him.

you slowly got ready for bed after washing your face and brushing your teeth. you put your chin in your hand as you thought to yourself ‘where am i supposed to sleep tonight?’

would it be okay if you and satoru slept in the same bed? you thought that since you had a king sized bed, you could sleep on one end and satoru could stay on the other end.

you gently sat down on the edge of your bed and snuck under the covers. you grinned, stealing another glance at him one last time before you turned your body to face away from the sleeping sorcerer.

the next morning

your alarm rang bright and early at 7:30am. you stretched your body as you noticed a slender arm across your abdomen, pulling you close. a head full of messy white hair snuggled between your shoulder and neck. you threw satoru's arm off of you as you sat up quickly.

"satoru gojo! wake up!" you hissed at him.

the sly sorcerer groaned and turned away from you to rub his face and eyes. "where's the fire, (y/n)?"

"we cuddled last night?! you were spooning me?!" you asked him, mortified at what you woke up to.

"hmmm, must've happened on accident."

you grabbed your blanket and covered yourself in disbelief, "oh my god. i've only known you for a month and you're already sleeping in my bed and trying to cuddle me."

"might as well be friends with benefits."

"i dare you to say that to suguru and shoko when we see them at the morning meeting."

"we have a morning meeting?"

"yes, we do. suguru came to find you last night, but you fell asleep."

"oh, he probably thinks we smashed last night." satoru laughed.

"you are gross." rolling your eyes at him, "—so are you going to get out?"

satoru frowned, "wow, you're kicking me out already?"

"yes, i am! go do your walk of shame to the boys' dorm. i have to get ready."

satoru got up from under the covers and stretched. your jaw dropped.

"since when did you have the time to take off your shirt last night?! you really tried it, satoru gojo!" you shrieked, throwing an ice shard at him.

of course, the ice shard just hit his infinity and evaporated when you called it back. he knew exactly what he was doing. he laughed and grabbed his shirt from the floor and threw it over his shoulder.

"see you later, (y/n). let's do this again sometime." satoru winked at you before sneaking out of your room. it was not a regular occurrence that satoru gojo would be walking around the dorms shirtless doing the walk of shame back to this room. he was better than that.

"gojo, please don't tell me you slept with my dorm mate." shoko begged as she opened the door to all the commotion next to her room.

"oh, hey shoko!" satoru greeted her.

"(y/n)! please tell me you didn't!"

"absolutely not! he's such an idiot!" you yelled back, disgusted at the thought.

satoru just hehehe'd down the hall.

later that morning

suguru and satoru were the first to arrive at the classroom as they sat cross legged on the floor. shoko and you arrived a few minutes later.

satoru had forgotten his sunglasses in your room this morning. you had them in your hands, placing his sunglasses on yaga-sensei's desk as you walked in. suguru and shoko looked at both of you, grinning. they wanted to tease you so badly, but they didn't dare. they didn't want a blast of water in their faces from you.

yaga-sensei opened the door and spoke. "as you may know, the school year is ending and we are going to have two new first years. you four will move on to become second years."

satoru raised his hand, "who're the newbies?"

"kento nanami and yu haibara."

all four of you looked at each other excitedly and smiled. you were all excited to have new classmates.

"also, one more thing—satoru, let's not be sneaking around campus shirtless. especially coming from the girls' dorm where you shouldn’t be." yaga-sensei sighed.

you turned bright red and refused to make eye contact with your sensei or satoru. shoko and suguru started laughing. you prayed that yaga-sensei wouldn't tell your brother about this.

DIVIDERS PROVIDED BY @/ANLIAN-AISHANG

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meimi-haneoka · 6 months ago

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Clear Card Trivia 3 ~ Sakura's journey of growth and self-understanding throughout Cardcaptor Sakura Clear Card

Hello and welcome back to my "Clear Card Trivia" series, a collection of informative posts where I delve into certain aspects of the story of Cardcaptor Sakura Clear Card! ✨

The topic I will talk about today has been on my "to-do list" for long time. It's something I felt the need to talk about, and I won't hide the reason why: the desire to fully eviscerate this topic grew particularly after reading around certain criticism of Clear Card Arc. But also after listening to CLAMP's Twitter Spaces, particularly the ones towards the end of the story.

It's something that, setting aside my obvious love for the new characters, will always make me think that Clear Card Arc has been a very welcome addition to the series.

This post will delve into Sakura's growth throughout Clear Card Arc.

Sakura grew up considerably during the story, and had a character development that sadly not many people truly realized.

I'm not talking about an evolution of the character design which, despite changing and evolving throughout the story (as it's expected for a long-running serialization), kept depicting Sakura consistently with quite young looks...no, I'm talking about her mental growth, in relation to her self-knowledge and her relationship with her magic powers.

A journey that might almost feel "frustrating", because it is full of "up and downs", and Sakura sometimes seems to be taking one step forward and two back. Aside from the obvious practical reasons (the plot had to develop several other storylines simultaneously), it very much reflects the realistic growth of a pre-teen, which is never a straight line but is made of improvements and relapses.

Along the journey, I couldn't really avoid mentioning some bits of the development of Sakura's relationship with Syaoran, which will get its own deep and detailed post another day.

There's also an extra about the significance of the Clear Cards in the story, at the end.

I have to be honest, the post is very long, but I tried to insert visual elements to make it easier on the eye. If you're curious to know how the hell I found so much to talk about for this specific topic, follow me under the cut and dive into Sakura's journey throughout Clear Card (it's also a good way to review the story)! ✨

A Disconnected Beginning

Clear Card Arc starts in a very "festive" and happy way: everything is peaceful, a new exciting chapter of Sakura's educational life is starting with the beginning of middle school, Syaoran is back to Tomoeda, this time to stay forever with his beloved girl...everything seems so perfect. And precisely in chapter 1, before everything takes an unexpected turn, we have this scene here, which I consider the "true" beginning of everything:

Sakura says "I haven't been using this lately...well, that's for the better".

At the beginning of Clear Card Arc, Sakura seems to be feeling disconnected from her natural gift.

Despite she had to go on a quest to collect all the Clow Cards, which later she gave a new life to by changing them into Sakura Cards, we have to remember that Sakura was born with magic powers. They weren't bestowed on her by Kero-chan, nor by the contract with the Clow Book: she always had magic in her blood, and it apparently "woke up" on that fateful day she found the Clow Book in the library of her father.

At the beginning of this arc, Sakura seems to think that the purpose, the meaning of this natural gift which is literally part of herself, has been fulfilled by transforming all the Cards, and splitting Eriol's power as he had requested. Her words here seem to be suggesting a general idea of "if I have to use this key (therefore, my magic powers), it means something troublesome is happening, so it's better if I'm not using it because it means everything is okay".

And although we can't really deny that what happened afterwards is far from being able to be considered "peaceful", this scene here always left a bad taste in my mouth because there's almost a negative vibe attached to the idea of her magic, transpiring from Sakura's words. It's almost as if she's politely rejecting it.

Precisely after she places her Star Key in her jewelry box, probably hoping to never have to use it again, she has her first premonitory dream of the events that will shake her life afterwards. Almost as if her powers were trying to tell her "no my dear, this is you and you'd better come to terms with it as soon as possible".

Then, as we all know, the Cards turn blank. Sakura produces a new key while having another dream and a quest to fight and "secure" some strange phenomena happening around her begins, leaving her in a state of increasing confusion.

This is the beginning of the part of the story that I quite literally call "Sakura loses sight of herself".

At this very early stage of the story, she still doesn't know that she started losing control over her increasing magical power, and it is definitely not a coincidence that all of this began when she thought of shutting her main magic tool away in a box, hoping to ignore it forever. For plot reasons, this also happens simultaneously to Syaoran taking the spirits of the Sakura Cards away from her (because in the beginning, you had to be tricked into thinking he was up to something shady and was the real mastermind behind all the incidents).

Syaoran expected for Sakura to lose control over her powers, as his mother predicted a general period of trouble for her that could lead her to unhappiness, albeit without any clear indication of what could happen: Syaoran came to Japan knowing something was bound to happen to his girl and her powers, and that something was going to lead her to grief, but he had no idea about all the rest. So his uncertain and reckless approach, which ended up in some cases worsening the situation, is also somewhat understandable. He was acting like a worried, overprotective boyfriend at his wit's end.

The strange events, which Sakura materializes into a new set of Cards, surely leave her distraught and confused, not to mention the situation with the Sakura Cards and Eriol's missing replies, but I feel that what really destabilizes her core are the constant dreams she gets, sometimes even in the middle of her waking hours, making her faint on the spot wherever she is.

Premonitory dreams are a part of her natural gift that she began to express ever since the OG manga, but she never seemed to really understand them or take them seriously.

This time around, she keeps seeing this cloaked figure and this terrifying dragon, no one speaks a word despite her relentless questions and the cloaked figure seems to be wanting to take her newly made key away (Lilie!!! what were you trying to do!! *facepalm* she probably tried to pull her closer so she could talk to her), so it's just normal that all of that leaves her increasingly stressed and anxious, even though initially you never see her openly and verbally stating that, due to her overall positive nature ("I'll manage it, somehow" is part of her "everything will be alright" invincible spell, and this is indeed what she keeps telling herself in the beginning of the arc, even though in some occasions it turned out to be a double-edged sword, as sometimes it looked more like sweeping her fears under the carpet, to me).

"Something Is Not Right"

Dream after dream, Card after Card, Sakura begins to have these general feelings of discomfort and of "something is not right, here", as she openly states to Syaoran in this scene of volume 4, chapter 14. There's something about this situation that is pricking her sixth sense, and makes her uneasy, but she can't quite put her finger on it yet. All she can do is to keep "fighting" these phenomena happening around her, hoping to find out more along the way. She reiterates the same feeling of uneasiness at the end of chapter 15, after what I consider one of the most concerning side-effects of her poor control over her powers: Sakura seems almost "in trance" while she leads her guardians to the exit of the maze, and acts in a very uncharacteristic, cold way by shoving her bag in front of Yue to make him hold it for her. It's almost as if her magical sixth sense worked too strongly and warped her personality in that moment: an effect that has been mentioned several times in relation to powerful magicians like Clow, Eriol and later Kaito too, so it's not farfetched at all to attribute this one-off occurrence to her loss of control over her strong powers, which ended up affecting her personality too. Luckily, it didn't happen again in the rest of the story and the capture of this Card was completely changed in the anime (a wise decision imho, since the JP fandom is particularly fussy about the integrity of Sakura's character, and she needed to stay "Sakura" in order to do what she did at the end).

At the culmination of a "mini arc" (the visit to great-grandpa Masaki) characterized by uncontrolled visions of Nadeshiko, another frightening dream (one that ended up dragging even Akiho in, due to the synchronization) and Sakura for the first time ever confronting Syaoran about the things he's been hiding from her, we reach the following scene of volume 5, chapter 23.

"I Wish I Had A Mirror"

I always considered this scene extremely important, because for the first time Sakura spells out clearly the inner turmoil that's been gnawing at her soul ever since this ordeal with the new Cards started.

"The truth is...I'm the worst at understanding myself. And that is probably causing lots of concern to everyone." "I wish I had a mirror. A mirror that could reflect the real me. Then, I would probably understand how to not make everyone worry"

Here, Sakura clearly spells out the frustration of knowing, feeling in her bones that there's something wrong with her, something that she's not understanding about herself, and that something is causing problems, but most importantly, is causing her loved ones to worry about her. Let's not forget that not only Syaoran, but also Yukito, Touya, Fujitaka, Tomoyo, Eriol & his family have all been watching her situation in apprehension, each of them making decisions and moving discretely in a direction they felt was right (and admittedly, not all instances were so).

Sakura can somehow feel all of that, she can feel that it's related to something she still hasn't realized about herself. This tends to be forgotten because it happens in a relatively early part of the plot, but notice how this is the same problem Kaito suffers from. A quite stunted ability to understand oneself. Sakura and Kaito definitely have lots in common, when it comes to this specific part of themselves. Keep this in mind, because it'll be relevant later.

And then, the situation worsens.

Sakura's dreams start to terrify her, because they begin to show Syaoran's face under the cloak of the mysterious figure who's scaring her in her dreams. An apparent truth she cannot accept, she won't accept, even though she's still unsure about what exactly these dreams she's having are. Despite her boyfriend has been acting shady for long time, she decides to trust him and wait for him to talk to her about all the stuff he's holding inside, instead of putting him through the wringer. This also means, though, that Sakura will keep all her fears to herself, eventually bottling up.

Furthermore, Kaito starts to rewind time to fix a situation without a way out (in chapter 28, Akiho was on the verge of going berserk completely and unleash the artifact), creating an additional sense of confusion when Sakura can feel that her finger is numb due to strain, but she can't understand why (she had fought Kaito's time magic unconsciously). Whenever Kaito will rewind time, even later on, Sakura's magical sixth sense will try to wake her consciousness up more and more, giving her these vibes of "deja vu" or making her act in an apparently inexplicable way.

In the first part of Clear Card, Sakura sometimes literally looks like a soul wandering about in confusion, dragged by the events.

I wish to point out that this is not a flaw in the characterization, it is a precise design by CLAMP. Sakura IS, in this part of the story, confused and lost, overwhelmed by the events. She has no idea how to approach this matter other than "treating the symptoms" as they come. This happens because she's still, surprisingly, quite reluctant to embrace a fundamental part of herself: her innate magic power, which expresses itself mainly through her intuition. But we'll gradually get there.

Around chapter 30, before the big realization, Sakura's situation reached a point where:

- her Sakura Cards unexpectedly became blank; - almost everyday (sometimes multiple times a day) there's a new incident that she secures into new transparent Cards; - she constantly sees ominous dreams (in scattered order) with a cloaked figure acting in a questionable way and a scary dragon, and at some point she starts seeing her boyfriend under that cloak; - her boyfriend acts shady, Eriol doesn't reply to her messages; - there's a general feeling of "something is not right" with her magic and some stuff starts to not make sense to her (because Kaito rewinds time)

It is at this point that Sakura finally moves one (giant) step forward and connects all the "puzzle pieces" she collected (particularly, how much more "obvious" the creation of a Card became) and understands that she's been the one causing subconsciously each and every single incident that lead to the creation of a new transparent Card.

"I'm Angry At Myself"

And with Syaoran finally coming clean with her (because at that point he had no reason to keep things hidden anymore, as the thing he was trying to delay ultimately happened - and believe me, I'm sure he partly felt relieved to not need to lie anymore, as that took quite a toll on him too), Sakura can at last give an explanation to at least a part of the things that are happening. And she finally realizes that the doubt that was tormenting her was true: she DID, in fact, not understand something very important about herself, she didn't realize that it was her own power going out of control and that all the incidents that happened bore "her magic signature", so to speak. She failed to "tune in" with her magic.

For the first time ever, Sakura expresses anger at herself.

She will direct that anger (to a lesser extent) to Syaoran too, but I'll tackle that in a separate post.

This is a moment of deep reflection and regrets for Sakura: the poor understanding of herself, the poor "communication" between her heart and her magic powers brought to a situation where her most beloved person was putting himself in danger in order to protect her, while trying to not make things escalate. This is a very sensitive, beautiful and important moment, steeped in conflicting and complex feelings (and remember, Sakura is just a pre-teen. It is normal for a pre-teen like her to not understand herself, but there's just one tiny detail: she's not a common pre-teen, due to her natural gift, and she needs to take that into account). Eventually Sakura calms down, and after creating Rewind, her resolute face while hugging tightly Syaoran suggests that from now on she'll face this matter from another, more courageous and determined perspective.

Or at least, these were her good intentions. Because unfortunately, insecurities are hard to eradicate and in the central part of the story it's shocking to realize how far longer Sakura will insist in shutting away her emotions and refusing to listen to her heart (and intuition) fully.

"It's Just My Imagination"

Part of Sakura's anxiety might have been sedated with the revelation that the Clear Cards are produced by the girl herself, but unfortunately the true core of her problems was not solved at all and will only surface more clearly in the next 20 chapters.

Sakura actively starts having "premonitory bad feelings" when she sees Akiho in volume 7 chapter 34, a bad feeling that she does check with Syaoran, but quickly dismisses as "well, it's just my imagination". This will basically be one of the major problems preventing her from reaching the complete control of her magic. Sakura, knowing her magic potential, should've given way more credit to her sixth sense, but her anxiety, her insecurity and her crippled connection to her innate gift still pushes her to dismiss these "signs" as nothing really important or true. Timely as hell, a few hours later something bad will indeed happen to Akiho, where she completely loses consciousness for the first time and the clan/Association actively starts to absorb Sakura's power through the artifact implanted in Akiho. All of this was caused by the high concentration of magic that "triggered" Akiho's artifact (and here I have to sarcastically "applaud" Kaito, just like Syaoran he's another one who does stuff before thinking through, ultimately worsening the problem).

Once trapped in Akiho's artifact, thanks to her power Sakura can see the most horrifying glimpse of Akiho's past, when she was turned into a magic artifact, by living it on her own skin. And even though Kaito is forced to rewind time once again to save the situation, erasing these memories from Sakura's head, her heart (which is tightly connected to her magical sixth sense - I'd daresay her heart is straight up the source of her magic) DOES REMEMBER, pushing Sakura to act in an apparently irrational way, crying and hugging Akiho tight in empathy. Sakura is particularly shaken by this feeling, still in pain even hours later, but once again she doesn't understand where it comes from. However, she does express with Syaoran an intention to talk to him about it once she's able to put it into words, and in the meantime do her best with all the rest. At least, there's an intention to understand better this part of herself, but it's still soon to see actual results.

Aaand CLAMP really seem to be wanting to test Sakura in this arc, because at this point of the plot, they add the electrocution spell. 😅 No one seems to understand who caused it (it's not Sakura, nor Kaito, but now we know it was none other than Yelan!!) and Sakura's anxiety increases once again. The fact only Syaoran gets affected by it inevitably reignites the doubts in her mind, unwittingly reminded of that terrifying dream of Cloaked Syaoran she keeps seeing...but she stubbornly keeps telling herself "no, it's not like that, it's just a dream". It's undeniable that this situation where she cannot understand her foretelling dreams yet, and the way they show her scattered hints because her power is out of control, has surely contributed to Sakura's insecurity when it comes to trust her own intuition.

Her power is so out of control at this point, that even when Kaito shrinks her and throws her in a hole carved into a tree (landing in a "world" created with magic where he hopes she'll create the right Card) her dreams take over again (it's apparent by the "shaaan" sound and how everything turns suddenly pitch black, a common background of her dreams), showing her Akiho in the dress she was wearing when she was turned into an artifact and, inevitably, Sakura's biggest fear, "Cloaked Syaoran". Pay attention because these visions she's getting here thanks to her power match what will happen later on: what the talking flowers tell her here will turn out to be the beginning of the lyrics of the main theme of the "Alice in Clockland" play. This vision of Cloaked Syaoran seemingly "about to do something" to Akiho horrifies Sakura to the point of screaming in terror and creating one of the most unsettling Cards, "Break". It is after this very scary moment that Sakura starts to wonder very specifically for what purpose she is creating all these Cards. The purpose is actually more than one, but she definitely posed herself THE RIGHT question, as this brings her one step closer to the core of the problem and eventually embracing her own magic abilities.

Then, between chapters 43 and 45 we finally start to see some changes in Sakura: surprisingly, she begins to listen more to her sixth sense, first catching Yukito red-handed while activating a newly acquired magic, and then wondering about a strange painful feeling in her chest when her father tells her that lately she and Akiho became even more similar. We were all lead to believe that this was the foreshadowing of Akiho taking her place (cause everything in the plot at this point deceivingly hints at Kaito wanting to switch them), but she actually was getting foreshadowings of the "rewritten world", where Sakura would genuinely feel wrecked to know that someone important to Akiho was missing, precisely when Akiho would've become part of her family as her twin. In fact, in chapter 45, before falling completely asleep, she hears again the ominous "you won't be able to come back" (the Association's threat to Kaito), wondering WHO wouldn't be able to come back - somehow, Sakura knows that it's not directed at her.

"Just Tell me Honestly How You Feel"

And then, we reach another moment that I consider pivotal for Sakura's growth during this Clear Card Arc. The moment when she's on the verge of breaking down and finally lets all her feelings out.

Her anxiety over the dream with the Cloaked Figure reached the highest peak, so much that she finally manifests a Card, Mirage, that challenges her precisely with that appearance. While Sakura battles that Card (which at the moment she still believes it's an actual person), she seems resoluted to get to the bottom of this story, and to pull down that hood to know the truth. You can really feel that she's so done with all this psychological torture. The fact the real Syaoran appears right at that moment and she finds out the person she saw was just a Card is partly a relief for her, but also throws Sakura again in despair because who the hell is that person in the dream, then??

Syaoran, as the good and attentive boyfriend he is, can just feel that Sakura is stressing over something, so he brings her to his home to help her calming down. And to her umpteenth attempt at sweeping her negative emotions under the carpet, beating around the bush commenting over the tea with a fake smile, he cuts immediately her bullshit and just tells her : "You don't need to force yourself. Just tell me how you feel right now". When she hears that she's allowed to speak out her emotions with honesty, Sakura wears on her face one of the most heartbreaking expressions of the entire manga. She's literally about to break down in tears of exhaustion, as you can see it above. ☝️ Listening to her, gradually, Syaoran encourages Sakura to get out all that's been torturing her lately, particularly about the dream with the Cloaked Figure. It is a very difficult moment for her, because she has to relive the dream, and expose in front of him all the fears and doubts that were trying to tamper with her trust in him. Courageously, she goes through with it, even though her denial ("it's just a dream!") is so strong that she ends up creating another Card: "Dreaming". Sakura at first seems relieved to see the Card, in the hope that everything she saw was indeed a mere messed up dream and nothing else (see? she's again self-sabotaging her relationship with her magic) but Syaoran with his frankness is quick to bring her feet on the ground: the kanji on the Card show "yumemi", and the word can also indicate a "foretelling dream".

Although Sakura seems disheartened at first, her next dream with the Cloaked Figure is much more relaxed, so much that even the dragon doesn't particularly scare her anymore: our girl's intuition makes her correctly feel a sense of loneliness in this dream, which she attributes to the hooded figure, not realizing that it was more likely coming from the dragon itself (aka, Kaito). After all, in chapter 72, Lilie will confirm that her presence ended up distracting her from the one "character" she should've paid all of her attention to. Her intuition, despite being misattributed, ended up having a positive effect through the synchronization with Akiho: the girl will wake up with the same feeling of discomfort of her friend, and as if guided by hitsuzen, she will head to the garden where she'll find a sickly Kaito staring at the moon - most likely feeling the loneliness Sakura perceived in her dream. I like to think that in this scene of chapter 48, Sakura subconsciously helped Akiho comforting Kaito, by waking her up with the unresting feeling, precisely when Kaito needed it the most. Still not completely embraced her magical sixth sense yet, but a significant improvement.

The road between chapter 48 and chapter 52 is paved with lots of struggles, as the Mirror Sakura Card gets stolen by Kaito, Sakura runs the risk of being absorbed into Akiho's artifact again, she meets Momo for the first time and she's even given a hint about Kaito's plan (or what Momo thought was his plan, as he had benignly lied to her about that), but almost all of that gets rewound and erased when Kaito intervenes. Moreover, despite not remembering anything consciously, Sakura is left with a sense of unhappiness when she looks at her home, a remnant of her brief journey in the world of Momo's book which straight up threw her into despair, showing her what her life would be if everyone forgot about her. She also finds once again a Card produced out of nowhere, "Time": I'm convinced she produced this Card because her conscience was awake while Momo and Kaito talked in stopped time, and their conversation triggered her sixth sense to produce Time as a result. Needless to say, all of this worsens her state of mind once again, which leads to the other pivotal, and finally resolutive, scene of chapter 52.

Never Avert Your Eyes From Your Heart

We finally get to what I consider THE scene, the one that will definitively shake Sakura from her deadlock, from the anxiety that stunted her connection with her innate gift and her deepest emotions. And the one who helps her overcoming all her fears is, of course, the love of her life - with a honorable mention for none other than his mother Yelan!!

Chapter 52 got a very, very special place in my heart, because it's basically one giant parallel between SyaoSaku and YunaAki. The two pairings experience similar situations, but the response from one side of each pairing is quite different. Let's remind you for a moment of the part earlier in this post when I told you that Kaito and Sakura, for most of Clear Card, surprisingly have one thing in common: they don't seem to understand themselves well enough, and both have a tendency to look away from feelings that cause unrest to their hearts - anxiety for Sakura, love for Kaito.

Syaoran, always attentive and observant towards his girlfriend, notices immediately that Sakura is suffering, as soon as he sees her at school. Despite being unable to touch her to comfort her, he offers all of himself to support and listen to her concerns. Sakura is visibly and pleasantly surprised of how the boy could read behind her mask, that usual contrived smile with which she tries to dissimulate her emotions and not make him worry. A bad habit she's consolidated lately, but that Syaoran is gently determined to dismantle. After opening up with him (and this is where Sakura differs from Kaito - by having an established relationship made of love and trust with Syaoran, Sakura lowers her walls with him), she falls once again into the usual trap of "but maybe it's just my imagination" and I love to see how Syaoran is her anchor to the ground, making her see the concreteness of this situation: he straight up tells her "you produced a Card out of it, it cannot be 'just your imagination'. " And then, like a precious family gift, he passes on to her the priceless words of wisdom of his mother Yelan, an advice that not only Sakura, but also the other "lost soul" of the other paralleling pairing should listen to:

"People with magical power should never ignore the turmoil and stirring in their hearts, the so-called 'intuition'. And it’s not limited to people with magical powers. People should never avert their eyes from the changes in their heart."

This is a turning point for Sakura. These words seem to positively "break" something inside of her, showing her the correct path to follow. CLAMP beautifully portray this process of "embracing and assimilating" the words she's just heard, by making her place her hand over her heart. I love when they do that (they used the same visual when Akiho heard Kaito's true name, and 'wrote it' on the most important page of the book of her life). Sakura is truly grateful for the words Syaoran relayed to her, precisely what she needed to get out of her impasse with her feelings and magic. She knows she can always count on the support of her soulmate even in the darkest moments, and she's thankful for having him in her life.

From this moment onwards, Sakura will experience several instances where her magical premonitory senses give her signals through the "stirring" of her heart. Contrarily to before, she starts to actively take them seriously, listening, without dismissing them as the delirium of an anxious little girl. This allows her to activate the Siege Card in the fraction of a second, successfully shielding herself from Kaito's time magic, making her the first person ever who achieved that. This also leads her to effectively remember that she saw Kaito using magic, even when time was rewound by him, and contact immediately Syaoran to talk about it, planning how to move from that moment onwards. A little relapse on her bad habit is immediately dispelled by Syaoran, and our girl even goes as far as saying "there's something inside Akiho", even though she's not sure exactly why she's feeling that way. But it's an intuition she's having and she decides to not dismiss it anymore, with everyone trusting and supporting her in that direction. By listening more and better to what her heart tells her, Sakura also decides to not confront Akiho about Kaito and his magic, because she's well aware of the feelings Akiho got for Kaito and she doesn't want to potentially disrupt their relationship. So, she decides to wait for her friend to talk about it first.

Thanks to this better understanding of her own intuition, she also says in chapter 57 that she wants to meet the guardian of the book "Alice in Clockland" once more, despite not remembering if and when she's met her before. This also ultimately leads her to accept the role of Alice in the upcoming play scripted by her friend Naoko, because her sixth sense tells her that it's inevitable for her to do so. It's important to emphasize how the other characters support and encourage her to listen to her innate gift, at this point, without trampling over her self-determination like they did before.

It is a moment of big growth and character development for everyone.

The Ultimate Growth: Finding a Meaning and a Purpose

What happens afterwards is history: the fateful "Alice in Clockland" play unfolds, and Kaito completes his plan to push Sakura to create the Card he needs, exchanging his magic artifact (the watch) with Akiho's one (the book), in addition to activating the forbidden magic to rewrite the memories of everyone, to fit Akiho as part of Sakura's family.

Sakura's intuition will be crucial to wake her true self up while in Clockland, succeeding in beating Kaito's magic multiple times, till Syaoran comes in and gives the "final blow", cutting off the spell definitively.

And even when everything seems lost because Kaito successfully activated the fobidden magic, changing their memories and erasing himself from their existence, Sakura's magic and sixth sense keep making her say things she either already said or heard before in the "unrewritten world". Not only that, but even after meeting Lilie in a dream and forgetting her face (due to the strong influence of the forbidden spell), bit and pieces of that conversation keep coming back to her, and she listens dutifully to every single one of these "feelings". Kaito might have overridden part of their memories (only the ones concerning him, Akiho and the events connected to the creation of the Cards), but the experience, feelings and personal growth of each character were left untouched, that's why the chemistry between Sakura and Syaoran is the same as before the play started, but also Sakura's personal relationship with her magic is far better than before (an information that might have seemed random and unimportant is that now Sakura summons Mirror even just to chat, an indication of her completely changed perspective on her magic).

Now that Sakura finally embraced her magical power, all that's left for her is to find a true purpose for it.

A question echoes in my mind, "What am I creating these Cards for?". Sakura poses herself this question halfway through the story, and she finds the answer to it precisely at the end of the journey.

Her powerful magic intuition, combined with her immense empathy, leads her to realize that somebody is missing from their reality, and that person is the one Akiho loves. At this point Sakura is unstoppable: she wants to listen to the voice in her heart that's screaming "Go and help them!! Give the true happiness back to Akiho!", and everyone can only follow her lead as she assertively puts into practice what her heart is telling her to do.

Sakura in this final part of the story shines brighter than ever. She's more assertive and self-confident than ever. All of this is because there's something she strongly wants to do with her innate gift, as Eriol unequivocally says in chapter 75: her power grows exponentially again, but this time it's not out of her control - it is Sakura herself who's voluntarily boosting it, thanks to her strong wish. And that allows her to control it and use it exactly as she wants.

In chapter 79 her growth reaches the highest peak, by handling the resolution of Akiho and Kaito's personal problems in an admirable way (she steps aside for a moment to give Akiho all the agency she needed), but also finding herself in front of an uncomfortable dilemma, which leads her to an unavoidable reality: Sakura quickly understands that she cannot be on everyone's side and there are lines to be drawn at some point. She can't be a pure and oblivious girl forever. She needs to grow up. There are choices to be made, especially when dealing with real evil people.

And Sakura choses to go on with the people she loves, even if that means she has to "stain" her "moral record" a little bit.

Empowered by this strong wish to fix the situation, she literally gives life to a miracle, protecting her dear friend and her beloved from the grasp of their abusers, simultanously giving everyone their true memories back. The effort exerts her greatly, but what she achieved is by far the most important thing she's ever done with her magic power till now: she helped two dear people lost in a life-and-death situation. Her magical growth went along with her personal, mental one.

This is also the reason why the accusations of "the other magicians should've trained her" end up being in vain: Sakura's problem with her powers was mainly on a personal level, not on a technical one. This was a journey she had to mainly walk by herself, finding the right balance and confidence in her abilities, deep down in her heart.

No one could've done that for her.

Merely training the practical aspect of it would've just worsened the situation, because Sakura wouldn't have been truly "in it" with her heart and mind. She needed to go through this process of growth, before reaching this stage of self-awareness in relation to her magic powers. I truly feel this is the reason why CLAMP made certain choices inside this story. Again, as I always say, a good part of Cardcaptor Sakura does revolve around magic, but the main focus and linchpin of this story is and always will be the main character's heart, her growth and the interpersonal relationships with her loved ones.

This makes Clear Card Arc, in my opinion, a worthy sequel and a full-fledged part of the Cardcaptor Sakura series. I think those who decide to skip it or read it with a superficial approach miss a journey of tremendous growth for our beloved protagonist.

So much for those who kept saying "This is not Sakura's story".

How can all that ☝️ NOT be Sakura's story?

I'll let you judge. 😊

Extra: The Significance of the Clear Cards

I want to digress for a moment about a thorny topic: the significance of the Clear Cards in this story.

Sakura isn't always completely passive towards the events happening around her, but wonders several times during the story why all those Cards are manifesting like that. While the first and easiest answer is of course "because her powers are going out of control" (and this is something Momo herself questions Sakura about in chapter 50), it becomes apparent at some point that the more the story goes on, the more the Cards that are created by her are particularly relevant and connected to the events that will happen in the final part of the story.

I know this is a sore spot for many who complain about not understanding the purpose of the Clear cards. It's because people tend to compare this set of Cards with the ones Sakura captured previously. That's not the right way to look at them, because their origin and purpose are different and change throughout the story. Forget about the Sakura Cards, even though so many of these "Clear Cards" (which are never called so, not even once, in the story itself, but just "new cards" or "transparent cards") might look so similar in purpose to the previous ones.

First of all, the Clear Cards are an outlet for Sakura to vent in a healthy way her power in excess. Power that if kept inside, untapped and confined in her body, might have unpredictable harmful effects on her (<- probably the grief Yelan foresaw). God bless the Clear Cards for existing and allowing Sakura to vent out these bouts of uncontrolled power in a relatively safe way.

The Cards that Sakura produces in the beginning are sometimes reminiscing of the Sakura Cards, because her power manifests itself basing on Sakura's experiences, feelings, thoughts and wishes. The Sakura Cards are an important part of her life (before Syaoran took them, she literally acted like their "mom", keeping them alive with her power) so it's only normal that the first base for some of these new Cards would be a magic tool that she already knows. In this sense, it becomes easier to understand why many of the "captures" seem so easy, way too easy compared to what a reader would expect from a sequel: the goal of the capture here isn't to make her power and experience in capturing cards grow. She already had 2 arcs to do all of that. The capture of the Cards in this third arc becomes something new and unexpected: a "damage control" of a regrettable situation with Sakura's powers, while she learns to dominate them and enter into harmony with her supernatural abilities. The growth Sakura needs here is mainly a mental one. Performing her magical power aimlessly without having a true connection with it and a true understanding will only exacerbate the problem. This is the reason why, despite having a "capture" element, Clear Card derails from the previous arcs in the purpose of the capture. It's a pity that an element that should've brought freshness to the plot was in many cases received as an actual flaw.

In the beginning, as Sakura's power is completely out of her control, some Cards might look completely random too - they don't look based on Cards, thoughts or wishes (like Appear, Reflect, Action, etc.). But pay attention, because the more the story goes on, the more the Cards begin to become particularly specific to something that shook Sakura's heart in that moment, or referencing events/feelings that will become pivotal to the events Sakura will experience later. Especially regarding Kaito's plan. Many of the later Cards Sakura produces are a direct reflection of the feelings and wishes that Kaito infused in the activation of the forbidden magic, with the creation of "the story for Akiho", the one he wanted to absolutely have a happy ending for. Cards like Repair, Promise, Choice, Kindness, True and False, Synchronization, Rewind....many of them didn't even get to express their magical abilities in a "conventional way" (everyone expected to see Sakura literally activating them like she does with all the others), but it's just because at that point the Cards Sakura is producing are born following her premonitory intuition: thanks to the hints/speeches that those Cards give her in Clockland, Sakura little by little regains consciousness of her true self (it's a pity that many English readers will never realize all the times Sakura was about to "wake up" in Clockland, because the translation didn't respect the change in fonts of the JP text). Sakura wasn't supposed to "use" them in a conventional way (how do you "use" Kindness? You force people to be "kind"? 🤨 and what about Choice??), she was supposed to listen to them and let them guide her towards the truth. This is also the reason why all of these Cards bear the face of her loved ones. Think of them as tarots. Which is, incidentally, another use of the original Clow/Sakura Cards. I am basically sure of this interpretation because the kanji of some of those Cards I mentioned above are brought up during the climax: particularly when Akiho talks to Kaito in chapter 78, she uses two specific verbs, referring to Kindness (慈愛 - a kind of gentle and tender love) when she describes the love and support her family gives her in this rewritten world, and to Choice (選択) when she questions Kaito about his choice to disappear completely from her life. So to summarize, the last Cards Sakura produced "accidentally" weren't accidental at all, but were actually specifically produced by her power in reference to Kaito's plan, to help her finding the way out to a dire situation. This represents a very important indicator in the plot: at that stage of the story, Sakura started to listen more and more to her intuition and her sixth sense, finally quitting her bad habit of downplaying it ("maybe it's just me") but actually giving it credit and taking it seriously, trusting her instinct to lead her in the right direction. And this was, of course, all thanks to the speech Syaoran gave her back in chapter 52. It is also the case of the Rewind Card, which Sakura will ultimately understand the purpose of on her own, at the very end of the series. That's the moment where everything will become clear and make sense to her: "This Card, too...I created it precisely for this moment". The Clear Cards ultimately became the embodiment of her foretelling powers. Which then led to the birth of the first two consciously created Cards, Blank & Remind, which will become so important in the climax.

If we ever get a new arc in the next years, we'll certainly deal with a more mature Sakura, who's more in sync with her magical powers 🩷.

#card captor sakura #cardcaptor sakura #clear card arc #ccsakura #sakura card captor #clamp #sakura kinomoto #syaosaku #clear card trivia #I hope this post will make you look at Clear Card from another perspective #I'm sorry for the length but I really wanted to make a deep dive

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