#cause he was never dark and gloomy in the first place just TIRED of everyone (his dad’s) bullshit canon CONFIRMED

[glowingsand]

the shadows around rei’s eyes are pretty much gone. just putting that out there.

[crepe-of-wrath]

Sickeningly Sweet Shouta Scarf Saturday

Notes/Warnings: fem Reader; fluffy fluff; takes place in a canon divergent timeline where there was just some nice slice-of-life time after the USJ incident; Mic and Midnight make an appearance

Who had time to eat in the cafeteria?

Your lunch time was far better spent hiding the fact that you were once again staring at Shouta Aizawa, the most beautiful boy in the entire world. He had the most perfect--the most perfect--dark hair. And he was very quiet, which you liked. Loud noises and loud people had made you anxious ever since you could remember. The only thing about quiet little Shouta Aizawa that upset you was that he always looked so tired and sometimes a little sad. You wanted to make him happy.

Your friends thought you were ridiculous. Aizawa was a terrible match for you, they said. Sure, you were both smart and that was a good thing, but Aizawa didn't appear to have much style, whereas you already had big, serious Pros interested in your fashionable and functional accessories and support gear. You were one of the wealthiest and prettiest girls at UA, but you were also a friend to anyone and everyone. He, on the other hand, always went around with his nose in the air, always thinking he was too good to have to deign to associate with the rest of the world. But then he also somehow had those two extremely lame and weird friends, Yamada and Shirakumo, and could you even imagine having to hang out with them all the time (though your friends pointed out that at least Shirakumo was built and Yamada's eyes were pretty)?! Worst of all, Aizawa was so gloomy and didn't seem to have any ambition of his own while you were already always so hard on yourself and wanted to go places. He'd never be able to give you the support you needed! What if he ran your spirits down with one of those barbed little observations of his?

You knew your friends meant well, but they just didn't see. Aizawa was a sensitive, shy and quiet boy who thought carefully before he did and said things. Not everyone needed to be brash and cocksure. And he was very, very handsome, with the prettiest black hair.

~~

One afternoon in your second year you were happily in your own world, working in one of the Support Course studios, when Aizawa materialized in the doorway. When you locked eyes with him, the shock caused you to jam the needle you were sewing with right into one of your fingers, making you yelp, and forcing you to quickly clean up blood, lest you ruin all your work. This was not exactly the impression of competence you hoped to present.

But your metaphorical rain clouds dissipated when Aizawa said, "I'm sorry, you were clearly concentrating. I should have knocked."

(See! your inner voice shouted. He's quiet and polite!)

"It's fine," you said, as you finished putting a power pad on your finger. "Can I help you?"

"I'm having a problem getting the right--I don't even know the word--the right texture? weight? feel? for my binding cloth weapon. Everyone says you're the expert to talk to about this sort of thing."

You two spent the rest of the afternoon testing out different fibers and materials, sharing giggles over what failed, and high-fiving one another when you figured out the right amount of wire to give him just the drape and action he needed.

"Thank you, thank you very much," he said, giving you a little smile. It was the most magnificent and exquisite smile there had ever been, of course.

"I will have it ready for you as soon as I can, Aizawa!"

You pulled multiple all-nighters to make the weapon for Shouta. When it was done, and you were all alone in your studio, you kissed it for luck.

You started in on a second binding cloth not long after giving Aizawa that first one. It only made sense for him to have a second one ready for immediate use when he needed to turn in his weapon for replacement. You finished this one in the dead of night as well, and yes, you gave it a kiss. You would have died if Aizawa ever knew: he would think it was such a silly thing.

~~

After you graduated from UA, your parents and your friends desperately tried to fix you up, and sometimes you almost let your mind wander away from the lovely dark-haired boy who held pride of place in your heart.

And then you would receive a damaged old binding cloth in the mail. You would salvage what you could from the old one, prepare a new one, and give it your secret little kiss for luck before messaging Aizawa to let him know it was ready. He would reply with a time and place for a meeting.

At first, you had assumed these meetings would bring you joy, but they often did the opposite. Aizawa was always so sad. Grief and guilt had turned him into someone who was actually as brusque as your friends has always said he was, although he was still wickedly funny and as polite to you as he was to anyone. Still, you were worried.

So, you brought your concerns to Present Mic and Midnight, who were also clients of yours by now. You didn't feel it was your place to interfere with Aizawa's personal matters directly. You wished you knew him that well, but you didn't.

"I'm concerned about Aizawa Shouta," you said. "I've never--not once--met him to bring him his binding cloths in an office or anything that looks like it could be a home. And I don't think that he is dealing well with Shirakumo Oboro's death."

They considered what you had just said for a moment.

"Wait! Aizawa asks you to bring the scarves to him in person?" said Mic, who looked almost giddy. You felt this was a bit inappropriate, given the seriousness of what you had just told them.

"Of course he does," said Midnight. "Of course he does...I knew it." Apparently something about Aizawa being sad and needing some help was very funny, and you were happy to be on the outside looking in when it came to the joke.

After a few seconds, both of them seemed to realize how improper their reactions were, and they sobered up--at least as much as they could. "Leave it with us," said Kayama. "And thank you for looking out for our sweet little grumpy boy."

~~

You waited for Class 1-A to leave their homeroom--they were all discussing hero names as they streamed out, so you might as well have been invisible to them. After they were gone, you poked your head in, and Aizawa invited you into the room. You acknowledged Aizawa with a bow and produced the familiar box. You hadn't kissed it this time. Apparently the luck of your kisses had run out.

"I'm sorry that this one took so long to produce, but I couldn't salvage anything from its predecessor."

"No need to apologize. It would have been irrational for me to expect you to have a new one prepared right away."

The new scar under his eye looked very painful. (And hot! Don't forget hot! said the wildly inappropriate voice in your head.)

"I'm sorry you got hurt," you said.

"Thanks, but it's part of the job."

You were both holding an end of the scarf box. Had your hands ever been this close? Why had you never noticed how large and strong his hands looked? (Think of how it would feel if he held you! said the unhelpful, inappropriate voice.) The air around you suddenly felt very, very heavy and you knew you had to leave before you embarrassed yourself.

You released the box, backed up a couple of steps and were about to turn around when you met resistance. Two hands, which revealed themselves as belonging to Nemuri and Hizashi, pushed you back toward Aizawa and closed the door to Class 1-A behind them.

Shouta looked like he was considering jumping out of one of the windows.

"I've had to watch this pining silliness for years now! I can't take it anymore!" shouted Mic.

Much more softly--which underscored how deadly serious he was--he added, "One of you better say something now, or I will."

Kayama's voice floated into your ear: "That's a promise, sweet thing."

You and Shouta just stared at each other, like terrified deer transfixed by light.

"Would you like to go to a park?" you blurted out, your nerves causing you to project at unexpectedly high volume. "Maybe sit somewhere nice and quiet? I could do some knitting while you mark your papers?"

Aizawa tried to hide his blush behind the binding cloth he was already wearing. You felt your own face heat up and sweat start to form. If you weren't so frightened of the twin cupids Midnight and Mic, whose hands were still pressed firmly into your back, you would have turned and run.

Fortunately you didn't, because the most beautiful boy you had ever seen or would ever see ignited his Erasure, which his two friends correctly interpreted as a GET OUT gesture and then, when the door was closed and it was quiet and you two were alone, softly said, "Yes, we should go to a park."

Shouta walked up to you with a small, shy, sincere smile that peeked out over his scarf. You decided you'd have to figure how to slip a kiss to the scarf that was still in its box sometime later. He slowly took your fingers one by one until he was finally holding your hand. Then, he led you out of the room.

Maybe you were just being hopeful, but you swore his eyes looked less sad.

[kyberphilosopher]

Androphobia

Requested? No Word Count: 7014

An Android attempts to offer comfort to someone with sleeping trouble.

Androphobia [an·drow·fow·bee·uh]; Fear of or aversion to men. A related concept is misandry, the hatred of men, but not necessarily fear of them.

  * ✭ ˚ ✧* ･ﾟ * ✭ ˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ  *

Every woman or female born member of society has experienced an off putting encounter with a man. 

This is not to be entirely blamed on men- not as a whole, no. But individuals, the ones you run into on your way out of the grocery store, the ones who stop you on the streets, they are the ones to blame. Some women have the guts to tell them off. Not an easy task with the given anxiety, but one to take pride in for the capability that comes with it. Some women stay quiet, rush away as fast as their polite feet can take them and hope someone will see the problem. They usually don’t. And some women are outliers, tricking their ways out of interactions with these men one way or another, and to them I take my hat off. 

There are men who are easily construed as monsters, when in the dead of night their silhouettes flash beneath the tallest of streetlights. And there is no reason to not believe them as such right then and there, for as spoken by our Lady Galadriel, “the hearts of men are easily corrupted.” And any look into statistics will back up this fear, any personal experience, any hug that’s gone on just a bit too suspiciously long, any catching of those wandering eyes and it’s easy to feel in your heart that men are not to be trusted. They are not to be confronted, nor left alone with, and they will jump at the opportunity to put down anyone for the validation of other men. 

This is the reality of women and men in 2021. It is the same for several in 2039.

 * ✭ ˚ ✧* ･ﾟ * ✭ ˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ  *

You step out of your old, dusty car. Chips of the dark red paint flake away as the raindrops hit it. Above you, the gloomy, warm gray clouds roll against each other in different shades and sizes, high above the skyscrapers and the stress of the world.

Gathering your belongings for the day, you shut the door with your hip and shoulder everything. Then you make your way towards the Police Department, your work, with the heels of your shoes scuffing against the parking lot. 

Across the way, you can see Detective Reid, who rubs his brow while he does his usual slamming of the car door. There’s no point in looking for Hank at this ungodly hour, he’d never be in on time. He’ll probably park his car next to yours as usual- a little too close so it’s hard to squeeze into your own and pull out without causing his vehicle damage, but you never say anything. Not because you are one of the people who feel threatened by Hank as a man- It’s more because you trust Hank as a person, that you’d never bring up the obvious annoyances he places upon you and everyone else. Though, once you had tried. 

(“Cars parked a little close, don’t you think?”

“Shut the hell up.”)

The inside of the Department is bustling. A female Android brushes past you briskly, the others at the front desk all seemingly click clacking away in their own brains. Even months after they’ve gained independence, it’s not uncommon for you to remember how they were before. How still and lifeless they were. And looking back on it, it was awfully sad. They seem busier now, more alive and fast. A strange image, in your mind, but not an unwelcomed one. 

You reach your desk in the lobby, on the right side of the room slightly separated from the officers. You’re a psychologist, so it’s not plausible for you to be seated next to bias. Instead you’re in your own corner, with a rather cluttered desk on the top and empty rows of drawers. You do, however, keep a small japanese cherry blossom tree on the top, courtesy of Hank, though his has all but fully withered at this point. 

And then you’re ready to start your day. Pull out your chair, click your pen and type away reports and notes on the computer to send to the detectives. You don’t have any meetings scheduled today, so there’ll be no need to prepare questions or anything of the sort. Just an easy day. 

And then...

As you and I, the dear reader, have already discussed, finding men to be generally scary is an easy task. And even though you are smart enough to know that it’s simply not possible to truly believe that every man or male presenting individual is terrible, or has done terrible things, or has experienced the desire to do something terrible, there are times where you can’t help the cautiousness. You can’t help the flinch, the distrust, the physical distance, the hand in your pocket grasping for anything to use in self defense. Seeing men like Detective Reid in power, brutish and given guns and easily agitated, certainly doesn’t help.

So when you swish your chair around and come to a stand, your heart drops. You’re looking into the presence of someone tall, with broad shoulders and a strong chest. A man. 

[Sort of.]

“Good morning, Doctor L/N.”

“Connor,” you breathe out, eyes flitting down as you attempt to quiet the thump thump thumping of your heart in your throat. “I- I didn’t-”

“Your heart race has increased. You appear stressed, Doctor L/N.”

He cocks his robotic head to the side, his eyebrows creasing as the literal gears in his head turn. 

“You just startled me,” you admit, grabbing the back of your chair and moving it over as an excuse to create a bit of distance between you and the [possible] threatening force. “What is it, Connor?”

Now, for context, you and he were not considered close. You’ve spoken a few times, though never as friends, only friendly. You remember seeing him last Winter, when he would stand out in the snow outside the station, just gazing up after Hank had already returned to his own home. You remembered how he was different from the other Androids, besides being more advanced to begin with. You’d never said anything about that. It was obvious the only person it would’ve really mattered to, Hank, was already aware of this. And Hank liked Connor. There was no point in interfering. 

In Connor’s eyes, you could really do no wrong. You were smart, intelligent, and diligent in your work. Your job had been threatened by the presence of Androids for years by the time Connor had showed up, but it still appeared that they wouldn’t have done your legacy justice. But despite this, interactions were scarce. You were not friends. You were friendly. And you were always on your guard. 

“I was hoping to hear your thoughts on a case Lieutenant Anderson and I have been working on,” Connor tells you. He’s always made efforts to keep eye contact with people, and the tilt of his head tries to follow your eyeline to do so. But it’s never to any avail. “I apologize for the abruptness, but the thought only occured to me last night and I think it could be a good one.”

“Yeah, sure,” you answer. “I can help with that. I’ll get the details from Hank when he comes in.”

“No need,” the Android quickly assures you. When you look up to him for a brief second, you can see his tongue sway against his bottom lip, creating the softest of imprints. His dark eyes glitter like a beatles in the catch from the light above. 

He produces a light, manilla colored folder lined inside with papers. “I hope you’ll find all the details you need here,” he explains, offering the file to you. 

You take it after a moment, watching his thumb let go in the softest, most normal way possible. 

“Thank you, Doctor L/N,” Connor smiles. “I’ll go get you your morning coffee.”

Connor is like a dog in that way. Not in an insulting way, or an obedient way. In a kind way, in a warm way. With his chocolate eyes and the dimples when he smiles, it’s hard not to want to just believe that he is incapable of hurting anyone or anything. Especially a woman. 

But when you snap back to reality, you can see his male form. His set back shoulders, the robotic strength, the fact that he was programmed to execute any task he so desires. And then you’re right back on edge, wanting to step back from him until you’re sure you can take a full breath. 

It’s easier when he’s taken himself away. You can see him through the glass walls in the kitchen, waiting for the pot to heat up. Doesn’t seem so bad from far away, like most of them do. 

You return to the chair and open the file. At first, your eyes flit to the pictures attached at the top- one of a woman that looks so familiar, another of a man whose angry brows cover his eyes. Then they move to the written report, and something clicks. 

The woman in the picture was an acquaintance from college. The man next to her was the main suspect, and apparently her lover.

* ✭ ˚ ✧* ･ﾟ * ✭ ˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ  *

“Morning Doc,” Hank waves tiredly. Then his tone changes slightly. “The fuck are ya doing at my desk for?” 

You push yourself from your lean on the edge of his property anxiously. “I read the report on your case. The Carla Rodriguez one.”

Hank sighs in his classic sigh, tired and grumpy from the morning and being alive. “What about it?” he questions, rummaging through his large bag of prescription pill bottles he’s brought with him every day this year. You suspect Connor has something to do with this.

“I had a... personal relationship with the victim,” you begin, crossing your arms. “I knew her.”

Hank looks at you, bewildered. “You were sleeping with my victim?”

“What? No. What? I- anyway. Carla and I were in college together.”

Hank’s face changes. He leans back with high raised brows in the way he does when processing something. 

“The boyfriend did it. I remember him from back then, I think. Real angry guy.”

“You’re sure you know what you’re talkin about?” Hank questions you, though not in an insulting way. You know it’s anything but that. 

“I’m sure. I can tell you what you need but you know I can’t testify. You won’t be able to use my bias in your report.”

“But the bias is the whole point.”

Your eyebrows shoot up, along with your shoulders. It’s the universal symbol for ‘I don’t know what to tell you’. 

“You talked to Connor about this?”

“Well, no. I- he wanted my opinion but I didn’t tell him this part.”

Hank glances around. “Where's he at anyway?”

You shrug again. You’re thinking about the disposable coffee cup on your desk, left there by Connor a few hours ago, that you’d never brought yourself to touch. 

“Run it by the Android before we do anything,” Hank advises you. “Nutjob’s got this whole system in his head.”

“Yeah,” you mutter as Hank seats himself. “That guy’s weird.”

“Tellin’ me?” Hank groans. 

And the rest of the morning you spend avoiding Connor, thinking at your desk, barely doing your job while you let yourself get lost in thought. You’re not usually like this. You’re very professional at work- you love this job. The thrill, the learning about criminals and their rehabilitation- it makes you feel so tranquil. Complete, even. 

But knowing a victim, knowing the perpetrator, still adapting to the change of Androids looking happy for once, knowing Hank pretends you’re the child he lost- it... it...

You snap your drawer shut. 

What’s wrong with you today? 

You huff out dry air. When you turn ever so slightly, you can see Hank at his desk, eyes already on you with concerned and empathetic brows. Seeing him calms you down a little, at least makes you feel more in the real moment. After a moment, you turn back straight. Then you smooth back your hair, and open a your file again. 

“Doctor L/N?”

You look up slowly, recognizing the boyish, sturdy voice of Connor. Sure enough, there he is. Tall, looking down at you with his warm, brown eyes. They remind you of an excited, loyal dog. Yeah, you think, Connor seems like a dog person. 

And then you catch the sharpness of how broad his shoulders are, how little effort it would take for him to kill you, or pin you down, or come at you in the dark. 

“Can I speak with you candidly, Doctor L/N?”

“You...may,” you say slowly. Connor begins to squat, until he is level with your eyeline, though he’s over on the other side of your desk. From your view, your cherry blossoms pink petals stand out against the paleness of his skin, and then the darkness of his hair. 

“I heard what you said earlier to the Lieutenant,” he begins. 

Truthfully, your eyes flicker around his face, mostly between his lips and his nose and his eyes. They’re all so realistic. Well, obviously that was the point in his creation, but still. They’re so human. Connor is human. Even the way he seems to move his mouth, like his lips are just a little dry, is human. Such a strange detail. Perhaps you would never have noticed it if he hadn’t gotten this close. 

“When?” you question. 

“About 3 hours ago, about the file I gave you.”

Your eyes snap away. Connor’s own eyes follow your movement. 

“I know that this must be difficult for you-”

“Connor,” you sigh, slightly exasperated, but still holding it together. Your eyes close like you can’t bear to look at anything in the present moment right now. You must be trying to pretend that you’re somewhere else. “I’ll be alright. This was in my job description.”

The Android’s eyebrows knit for a split second, confused. “Overseeing the psychology behind your friends death was in your job description?”

And it’s a genuine question from him. That’s what makes it so hard to contain your laughter, no matter how frustrated or overwhelmed you are right now.

“Yeah,” you finally muster with a light chuckle. “Apparently.” Then you’re back to business. “This is my job. I’ll be alright. Thank you for your concern.”

“I just considered that, since you’ve been on the news before, the suspect could know that you’re involved.”

“So?” you ask, slightly more snappy than intended.

“He may know you’re here and subsequently attempt to cause you harm.”

There are two conflicting sides in your brain right now. The first one says: Now think about this. How could he harm you in a place full of cops? It’s not like he knows where you live or anything. How could he even find that out? When they bring him in, he’ll be in custody the whole time. Gavin won’t let him out of those handcuffs. Everything will be just fine. 

And the other part? It shows you a dark, masculine figure, looming over you. Police department or not, he is there. He will cause you grief and harm, do something so terrible to you you could not even fully imagine it enough to anticipate yourself. 

And, despite your better judgement, and to your full awareness, you listen to the second half. 

“Okay, so,” you breathe out. “So what are you saying?”

Connor’s eyes draw to his left in a stutter, his mouth parting as if he’s in consideration. “The Lieutenant and I had talked about... having you stay in a... safer place.”

Your eyebrows pinch together. “What do you mean by that?”

Connor looks so human in this moment. it’s so apparent, and piercing in this exact second. The details in his eyes, slightest of blemishes on his cheekbones. 

Connor leans in, his eyebrows raising. Subconsciously, you lean back ever so slightly in response. 

“We were thinking of taking you to the Lieutenants place.” He sees your eyes widen, getting ready to give a vocal response. “It’s a very safe place,” Connor promises. “I can assure you there are many rooms to your liking.”

You take a minute, looking the Android right in his warm, hopeful, perfectly symmetrical eyes. “Connor, I’m not interested in having this discussion right now.”

“It’s just-”

“Back off,” you snap. It’s assertive. Something you don’t usually do towards masculine presenting beings. 

As soon as you say it, you regret it, however. The person across from you just looks so heartbroken, almost. His big brown eyes, the ones that remind you of a loyal dog, are looking right at you. How could you not feel bad for snapping at Connor? Sweet Connor, who doesn’t take pleasure in hurting people no matter how much you convince yourself he does. 

* ✭ ˚ ✧* ･ﾟ * ✭ ˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ  *

The Carla Rodriguez murder case went on for two more days. Her boyfriend, unfortunately, was not yet found. Hank was working on obtaining a warrant based on your instincts that would give him access to search family members houses for the man. Things were becoming focused. 

Each night you went home, you struggled to sleep. You did in fact, find out that Connor may have been onto something when he suggested the consideration of safety. You indeed stayed up later than usual, using both locks on your dirty apartment door for once. It was hard to fall asleep. Whenever you did, it became all too easy for you to imagine a solid, big, broad shouldered figure standing over the foot of your bed, waiting to strike. 

A man, as usual. 

Ironically, you did feel better when Hank- a man- would come into the station. And then there was Connor, who was somewhere between a puppy and a wolf, half following Hank, half fully capable of loading and discharging a gun. Connor made you feel safe too, but only by association. It felt bad to think about him after the snapping that occurred Thursday, but it could’ve made you feel worse to act unprofessionally in the work place. It was best you try to forget it, and try to forget that Connor has unlimited and invincible memory. 

On Sunday, you and Hank had your weekly scheduled lunch. Nothing fancy, just fast food from a food truck by the train tracks. You’ll both probably get burgers, except Hank will try to add lettuce and some vegan bullshit to convince you he’s sticking to his diet. Of course he will. 

You throw the keys to your locker in the backroom into your desk drawer, and slip it closed. Across the floor, Hank is already ahead of you, tugging on his crappy jacket and somehow standing patiently and grumpily at the same time. 

“Ready to go?” you ask as you approach him, your own jacket in hand. 

“Yeah, just waitin’ for the kid,” Hank replies casually. 

“The kid?”

“I’m ready to go, Lieutenant,” the enthusiastic voice of Connor rings out. He has one of those voices where you can tell when he’s happy and smiling too, and he is in this very moment. 

Nobody ever joins you and Hank. You knew Hank had taken Connor to the truck before, but that was just between them, and this was just between you. An odd decision on Hank’s part to make such a change. 

“Alright,” Hank calls back. Then he turns to you, the smallest of knowing grins on his face. “Ready when you are, Doctor.”

You just nod your head and start walking out to Hank’s car, unsure of what to do think. In the end, you decide to just not think at all. 

“What are you doing this for?” you’d ask Hank as you were walking, when the Android known as Connor was out of earshot. 

“What? You got a problem with Connor?” You shake your head no. “Well good. Because besides bein’ a freak he’s perfectly fine.”

Yep. Thanks, Hank. 

The drive over is silent, besides Hank’s music. You like his taste, but it doesn’t make you feel less tense around Connor. On the other hand, Connor is completely oblivious of said tension. You can see him in the rearview mirror, smiling and looking out the window every now and again. 

Once arriving to the scene, Connor gets out first. You click your seatbelt away, about to pull the handle open when you notice Hank hasn’t moved at all. 

“You coming?”

“Mm,” Hank fake thinks, flipping through his cd cases. “Nah.”

“Well then... well then are you even hungry?”

“I got food back at the office,” he sighs, not even looking up at you. “Indian from last night. Gonna wreak havoc on the ol’ plumbing.”

“Then what did you bring me here for?” you question finally, developing a tension headache from how often you’ve been knitting your brows together lately. 

Hank looks up and over, an almost offended expression on his face. You can see it in his wide old eyes, the angry eyebrows, the slightly opened mouth. 

“Because I’m trying to create a warm and loving social circle.”

“You one time told me die because I ate your jar of pickles!” you cry. “Oh my god- Hank, is this about me and Connor? Is that it? You want us to get along?”

“Yeah, and what if I do?” Hank turns to you fully, putting an angry hand on the steering wheel to clutch something. 

“It doesn’t matter!” you exclaim. “It literally doesn’t matter at all!”

Hank is quiet. You can see his beady, angry eyes on you, his jaw clenching. “Get the fuck outta my car,” he says at last. 

“Gladly,” you mutter. You open the door and slam it closed. 

Looking across the wet, rainy street, you can see Connor looking up at the sign of the food truck known as Chicken Feed innocently. You breathe out, feeling the heat from the previous ‘discussion’ beginning to melt away. 

Okay, Y/N, you tell yourself. Just go talk to him. 

You begin your walk across the street, hearing the light tapping of the rain hitting the asphalt all around you. His back is getting closer and closer. You still have a chance to turn around. 

“Hey, Connor,” you say lightly. 

“Hello, Doctor L/N,” Connor greets in return warmly. 

“Whatcha... thinking about eating, there?” you ask, both of you knowing damn well Androids can’t eat. 

“I’m not sure,” he admits. Then he shrugs, and very genuinely says, “I guess I could have some french fries.”

“Alright. I’ll get you some.”

And you do. And you feel so stupid while ordering it. The guy in charge, Gary, looks at you with an ‘are you sure?’ expression on his face, but you only continue with the order, confirming that, yes, you are sure. Then you and Connor sit next to each other in silence, waiting for your food to be ready. You pretend to be very interested in a stain on one of the back menus for about three straight minutes. 

“Here you go,” Gary hands you the food. You take the bags and speed off immediately to an umbrella by the place. Even though you’re essentially powerwalking at about 6 miles per hour, it doesn’t feel fast enough in the moment. Connor is right there beside you the whole time. 

“Here’s your fries,” you mutter, pushing the bowl towards him. 

“Thank you,” he says, formally. Then Connor just stares down into the bowl. 

“I appreciate you paying for this meal, Doctor L/N,” Connor decides to say after another moment. When you look up, you can see he’s leaning down ever so slightly so that he’s closer to your height, and making pretty sturdy eye contact. It’s moments like this that you think you’re talking to Connor’s social programming, and probably not him naturally. 

“You don’t have to call me Doctor, Connor,” you breathe. “We’re not at work right now.”

“I apologize. How would you like me to address you then?”

“Well... how would you like to address me?”

Connor thinks for a moment. You can tell because his led is switching between yellow and white. Then the beginning of his eyebrows start twitching, along with the corners of his mouth, just like a human would when they have several thoughts on the tip of their tongue but none of them seem just right. It’s cute when he does it. 

“You can just call me Y/N,” you rush out in an attempt to save Connor from quite possibly exploding. 

He does the twitching once more, then looks up to the top of the umbrella without moving his head. “And, is this outside of the workplace or in it as well?”

“What would you prefer?”

His led goes yellow again. He looks back to you. “That depends whether or not you consider us friends, Doctor L/N.”

This takes you back. You’re silent, stunned, looking at him with slightly widened eyes for a few seconds- maybe a whole minute- before you make the decision to look at your burger and change the subject. 

“How’s been adjusting to life as a free man?” you ask, unwrapping the foil from your warm food. 

Connor adapts to the subject change after a few seconds, and you know that he’s seen right through you. “It’s strange,” he tells you, deep in thought, but sincere. “But, people seem happy.”

“Are you happy?” you prompt further, biting a big bite into the meat. 

Connor thinks again. He thinks a lot. “Yes,” he decides. “I suppose I feel alive,” he admits. It sounds like a confession, and when he turns his head to look over to you, he sees your eyes are already on him. “Are you happy?”

“Am I happy?” you repeat in question. “I... guess I am, overall.”

“Do you enjoy working as a criminal and forensic expert?”

Now it’s your turn to think. You swallow down your bite. “Yeah, I think so. It’s what I’ve wanted for a long time. And now I have it, and I’m comfortable and all. So yes... And you? As a detective?” You bite into the burger again.

“Well, it is what I was created for,” Connor tells you, with an almost charismatic, joking tone. It looks like he’s smiling a little, too. Cute. “I think so. Working with Lieutenant Anderson has gotten better.”

“God, I remember when you first came in,” you roll your eyes. “Hank was all in a mood. One of the grouchiest days for him. But he likes you now.”

Connor watches you pull the burger away from your face. He’s thinking again, but also admiring your features from up close. He doesn’t usually get to do this with you. The proof is in the lack of response to the ‘would you consider us friends?’ question. 

“You know,” Connor says, and you can hear the sincerity in his voice for the millionth time. “I really admire how talented you are in your line of work.”

You feel heat in not just your cheeks, but in the rest of your face as well, as if you have a very sudden fever. You decide to keep your face down, trying to naturally make it not look like you’re using your burger as a shield. “Thank you,” you respond. 

The heat begins to subside, so you look back up to him. “I admire your...” and you can’t finish the sentence. Not because you can’t think of anything to admire. You know you had a good one in mind to say to him. But when you look up at his boyish face, with the innocent smile and the comforting eyes and the most human details in his skin, you lose your train of thought. 

It seems too late and rude to continue by the time you regain it, so you just decide to leave it and eat your burger as quickly as possible. 

“Are you done with your fries?” you ask, as Connor looks down at the untouched basket.

“Yes, thank you.”

You don’t even look into the waste of 2 dollars as you speed walk to the trash can and dump it full of everything. Then you hop across the street, Connor right behind you.

Getting back into Hank’s car makes you roll your eyes. It’s not that you’re mad with Connor anymore so much- not that you would describe the feeling as mad in the first place. You’re not even sure you’re ‘mad’ at Hank so much anymore. It’s more like you’re in the area that you previously had a yelling match in, so all that energy is still there. So stupid.

“Hey, you two,” Hank greets, though to you it sounds condescending.

“Hello,” Connor chirps back.

You just shoot Hank a glare.

“How was lunch?” The old man prompts, holding your eye contact knowingly the entire time.

“It was fine,” you tell him.

“Fine?”

“Yeah,” you practically seethe. “Just fine.”

* ✭ ˚ ✧* ･ﾟ * ✭ ˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ  *

You stay in your house for another two days. Sleeping has become far more difficult, though you’d never openly admit it. Hank can see it in your face. There’s dark circles under your eyes, far more noticeable than before. Your eyes are dragging themselves down, along with the rest of your body which seems to be in a constant slump. 

You’re like a zombie. You’re just carrying yourself around, mindlessly doing your tasks while you try not to nod off at work. Hank hasn’t said anything. He just watches you from afar, not knowing how to apologize because he’s never been able to pull himself into one. 

Connor hasn’t said anything either. Hank’s pet has continued his daily routines around the precinct, going where he’s told and sitting on the other side of the older man. You haven’t been observing them much lately. Been a bit too preoccupied with the threat of sleep paralysis to do anything that you find matters in a social sense. 

Carla’s case is still open. Her boyfriend is still out there, watching and waiting. Maybe for you. Maybe for some other innocent woman. You keep picturing him towering over you, his shoulders looming, strong jaw twitching with anger. Those masculine brows, defined with the intent to strike at you. Kill you, like your old friend. 

Finally, on the fourth day of little to know sleep, you fell asleep at your desk. Completely zonked out, your head slumped against the surface, squishing your cheek in the process. Connor jumped up from his seat, Hank following shortly after. But there was no threat, you were simply resting. Once the two realized this, they calmed a little. Hank opted to send Connor over to you to check you out, crossing his arms as he got ready to observe. 

The Android creeps over. Your breathing is steady. So is your heartrate. You’re not in shock or anything at all. You’re not even hurt. 

“Y/N?” he prompts lightly, now crouched to be close enough to your ear so he can whisper. His chocolate eyes glance around the precinct, looking for anyone who might have noticed you to try and save you some embarrassment. Then he glances towards the Captain in his office, and he knows he has to hurry himself so you don’t get caught and reprimanded. 

“Doctor L/N?”

No response. Connor looks back at Hank, who shrugs his shoulders nonchalantly with little help. 

“Doctor L/N, you have to wake up,” he tells you, poking the back of your slumped shoulder. 

You were asleep, yes, but apparently not very deeply. You stir from your slumber, raising your head and your mousy appearance to look over at Connor with confused eyes. 

“What happened?” you strain, stretching. Connor detects a bit of drool on the corner of your lips. 

“You fell asleep at work,” Connor explains slowly. 

“I did?” you squint, obviously still out of it. 

“You have... drool on your lips.”

You wipe the left corner. “The other side,” Connor gestures lightly to his own lips. “Yes. You got it.”

“Was I out for long?” you look around, adjusting to the so very bright lights of the building. 

“No,” Connor answers in that sweet, sweet voice of his. “Maybe a minute, or two.”

“Oh,” you say, your eyes wandering around. 

* ✭ ˚ ✧* ･ﾟ * ✭ ˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ  *

That night, it rains. 

Thunder echoes, with  ripples of light from the lightning that bears across the sky like great claw hands. 

You watch the view out your window from the middle of your bed for a long time. You’re curled up in a ball on the blankets, not even under them. You’re just there, watching the sky that reflects in your eyes. 

A sudden stir in you gives you a change of heart. Something you can’t explain to the fullest extent, something not even I, the one in charge of relaying all that’s happening to you, could explain the exact feeling. It’s like the snapping of a rubber band at 2:15 in the morning. 

You can’t stay in this apartment anymore. Not even two locks are enough to protect you. Not your kitchen knives, or the gun given to you from the department for self defense. None of it seems like enough, because all of those things are used after something happens. They don’t prevent it. 

You’re in a hurry. The comfiest pajamas you own are soaked in the salty rain water and protected only by the simplest of winter coats you own. It’s nice, though not appropriate for the current weather of course. Your hair gets drenched fast. Every individual drip that falls from the tip of your nose is felt, like you’re more hyperaware than usual. 

Now you’ve arrived at a house. A one story, fairly inexpensive home with a garage and recognizable old car out front. As you approach, you can already hear the barking of a dog, see a neighbor turn their lights on briefly to observe you, and feel the shivering of your knuckles as they tap on the door sporadically.

Come on, Hank, you think.  Please protect me. Please do this for me. 

And, believe me, Hank Anderson would’ve done it had he been awake. But he hadn’t been, and so he didn’t answer the door. Instead, the door swings open, and inside you see an Android. 

A tall one, with soft facial features. He has long, dark eyelashes framing dark eyes, surrounded by dark hair. He’s clean and clear cut, very put together. It’s Connor, Hank’s pet that you’ve never been able to get the hang of knowing. And he’s as shocked as you are. 

Your drenched hair, shivering body, distant look in your eyes. Though, Connor’s unsure of how he would appear if he had to show up to anyone’s house at 2:34am. Probably unwell. Probably a little bit like you. 

“Doctor L/N,” he says, though it seems mostly to himself. His parched lips barely move, though you notice how pink they look in comparison to everything else right now. 

“Can I come in?”

Connor is still for a few seconds, obviously still processing your appearance. For what, you don’t know. Must’ve been one of the few things he’s simply unable to calculate. But then he moves himself to the side, and you carry yourself in. 

As soon as the door closes behind you, everything is so much warmer. You haven’t been to Hank’s place in months, but it still feels as homey as it did before. It’s cleaner than it was a year ago. There’s more pictures on the walls, more clutter lining the shelves. He’s starting to care about things again. That’s good. 

“What are you doing here?” you suddenly ask, turning around to face Connor. 

That’s right- what is he doing here? He and Hank couldn’t be living together, could they? Or is... or is it that Hank is pretending Connor is someone else, too?

Connor’s led goes yellow, then blue, then back to yellow. “Lieutenant Anderson has offered me a place to stay until I’m ready to go on myself,” he explains, though the way it looks at you makes it seem like Connor doesn’t want to tell you this. Like he feels the need to explain himself. 

“Are you alright, Y/N?”

You wipe your face, smearing your leftover makeup from your eye with the rain water. It burns, but you can’t feel it over the cold. “I uh- um... I’ve been having trouble- trouble sleeping.”

Connor’s lips close, and he looks at you in understanding as you stand there, now feeling your own pressure of having to explain yourself. 

“Just like... at my place I can’t- can’t sleep. Not a lot of it.”

Connor knows he shouldn’t, but it’s right there on the very tip of his tongue. It’s so close to just spilling out, until finally it does, all at once. He’s too curious to try and stop it. “Why?”

“I just- I can’t-”

You’re looking everywhere. The floor, the wall, covering your eyes with your arm or your hand, shifting back and forth between feet, making a soggy spot on the floor from your dripping clothes. 

“Can’t sleep.”

When you look up to Connor again, you feel better. Still panicked, but like you’re not in trouble. His eyes are so soft. They’re so human, and comforting. He looks at you like he understands, and like he’s not upset. You can see why Hank would pretend he is who he is now. But there’s no one for you to pretend who Connor is. He’s just Connor. And he’s better than you. 

* ✭ ˚ ✧* ･ﾟ * ✭ ˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ  *

Connor lets you wear one of his sets of identical clothes. It’s a grey t-shirt and blue pajama pants. Your hair is still wet, but Connor doesn’t say anything. He lets you sit on the couch and watch one of Hank’s basketball recordings while he goes to make tea. 

He brings it to you and sets it down on the coffee table in front, but like days ago, you can’t bring yourself to touch it. Connor’s made himself a cup too, but doesn’t drink it. It’s deadly silent, the only light coming from the faint glow of the tv, the only sound coming from the biases of those annoying sports commentators. 

“Connor?” you whisper hoarsely, turning your body to face him. 

He looks over at you, at full attention. Such a soft boy. 

“Do you think I’m afraid of anything?”

Connor’s led goes yellow. It flickers in circles until finally he says, “What do you mean, Y/N?”

You look down at your hands. “W-when I try to sleep, I see someone,” you say, not bearing to look at anyone from that gender for a moment. “He never leaves me alone. I feel like I- like I’m seeing this thing everywhere. I can’t avoid it. It won’t leave me alone.”

“What is it?” Connor prods gently, leaning in in that innocent, but curious way he does. 

You open your mouth like you’re going to answer, but then your mouth goes dry. Instead, you just shrug your shoulders in a weak attempt of lying. 

“Um... why are you still awake?” you ask instead. 

“Androids don’t need to sleep,” Connor explains to you. “We just power down to conserve energy, but I don’t need as much as others.”

A light puff of air escapes your nose in time with the flickering of the corners of your lips. “Sounds like you’re bragging,” you tease for a second. 

Then it goes quiet.

“I don’t think you’re scared of anything,” you hear Connor’s voice say clearly. “At least, not that I’ve seen. You’re very diligent in your work.”

You take the compliment. It warms your chest for a moment, but the pit inside you is not so easily gotten rid of.

Your nails scrape against each other, breaking while you pick at one of your index fingers. “I think I have like... this fear of men. Fear of something.”

Connor’s led goes yellow.

“Androphobia, also known as the fear of male presences, affects nearly one third of the current female population.”

Connor watches you continue to pick at your nails. The memory of you standing at the door step, shivering like a kitten, drowning in the rain water stays on his mind. “Is this what you think you have, Y/N?” he asks, though this time it’s far more soft.

It sounds like he really cares.

You look up to him, your eyes glossing over from stress and the incoming wave of tears you can feel in the back of your throat.

“I can assure you, Doctor L/N, you are safe here,” Connor continues, holding eye contact as he speaks. “I won’t let any kind of harm get to you.”

The tears in your eyes seem less violent now. Like they’re disappearing already. And that’s how the story ends, in fact. With you, looking up at Connor, seated on Hank’s couch with your hair dripping around you- him promising not to hurt you. It ends on the silence that follows, right between the stare the two of you share.

  * ✭ ˚ ✧* ･ﾟ * ✭ ˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ  *

This is the first thing I’ve proof read. Also one of the longest things I’ve written somehow? It was fun. I apologize for any mistakes as English is not my first language.

[madame-wilsonn]

A New Beginning

Summary: as Henry stands in front of your bathroom mirror, at 3am, he’s determined to have a fresh start. Of course, you’re here to help.

A/N: this is just a small idea I had and wanted to share, I still have a few celebration requests to write but in the mean time, enjoy!!

Warnings: some angst along with it (but just a little bit) and of course FLUFF!! oh and English isn’t my first language!

Henry stared at his reflection in the mirror. His cheekbones were more prominent than they used to be, he had a few scars on his cheeks, his forehead, his skin was paler and his eyes…

Everyone used to compliment him for his eyes, flattering him, telling him how handsome he was, the ladies in the village gushing over how lucky his mother was.

“Oh and those eyes! I’ve never seen any like his.” they would all tell her.

But now, his once mesmerizing blue eyes were void, the liveliness sucked out of them, a vivid cobalt turned into a gloomy grey.

Henry looked like a mad man. If anyone saw him right now, they would think he had gone completely crazy, nothing holding him back from falling into inevitable insanity. Especially with this haircut.

Ever since he came back, a few months ago, he didn’t go to the barbershop. Actually, he didn’t really go out at all. He knew about the whispers, the rumors, he saw how annoyed you looked whenever you would come back from running some errands. And it was obvious that people were talking, pitying you for being with someone like him, offering you fake sympathetic smiles as you passed by them.

Truth was, he knew these people were right. Whatever they were saying, he already believed. He was only scared you would start listening to those rumors and realize you were wasting your life on him.

The man scoffed at himself.

How selfish can you be?

His gaze met his own self in the mirror and he sighed. He was tired, exhausted really. He was tired of the nightmares, of being such a heavy burden on your shoulders, of not being able to even look at you in the eyes or offer your children the attention they craved.

He was tired of being such a mess, a mere shell of the man he used to be, a terrible father, a terrible husband, a terrible soldier…not one thing he could do right.

He was tired of being himself. He wanted it to change.

He gripped the edge of the sink until his knuckles turned white, throwing a glance at your sleeping figure.

It was the first night he woke up from a nightmare without scaring the living hell out of everyone else in the house. Thankfully, you didn’t hear him as well.

Part of him, the part of him he was so ashamed of, would’ve wanted you to wake up. You seemed to be the only thing to soothe him and anchor him back to reality whenever he was sent back to these cold, sandy beaches. The horror always felt less horrible when he was in your arms, when it was your voice calming him down.

But he was glad you could at least have one good night. You were doing your very best to hide it but your delicate features were shadowed by the dark circles under your eyes, the constant frown on your brow and the tension in your shoulders. All the things he was already the cause of.

His right hand hovered over the cold pair of scissors. He didn’t want something fancy or elaborated. He just wanted to look like his old self a little bit more. He wanted his kids to stop playing or laughing whenever he came into the room. He wanted to make his wife smile again.

He wanted a new start.

He wanted it off.

With his fingers, he tried to grab a few strands to place the sharp blades and, inhaling deeply, made a first cut. The strand of dark hair fell on the bathroom tiles. He felt power running through his veins, his heart pumping faster at the sudden rush of adrenaline. He was finally doing something because he chose to, not because he was obeying orders. He wasn’t just a soldier who was too shattered to fight anymore and the more he cut, the more he felt like he was growing apart from him.

So he cut more hair and he did it again and again until he couldn’t feel hair tickling the nape of his neck, until the only long strands left were the ones covering his face.

“Henry?”

The man jumped a little, startled. He saw you in the mirror, standing before him in your nightgown, rubbing your tired eyes. He let go of the scissors, his heart pounding with some sort of anxiety like a boy who was caught redhanded stealing from the cookie jar.

“What are you doing, love?”

He turned around, trying to find an explanation to answer you but he couldn’t find the words to explain it to himself.

What was he doing?

“I-I was just...”

A quick glance at the scene and you pieced it back together. It was unusual but you knew your reaction would affect him greatly. Of course you weren’t mad at him, just confused

“So he decided to chop off his hair, it wasn’t a bad thing” you thought

Although you couldn’t understand why now and not tomorrow, you decided to ease up your seemingly tensed husband, you chuckled lightly: “Isn’t it a bit early for a new haircut?” 

Your voice was soft, you weren’t angry or annoyed at him even for waking you up once again. Henry found himself appeased by that. His behavior suddenly seemed to him extremely stupid and…incomprehensible.

“It’s gotten too long, I wanted to...”

You hummed, getting closer. You raised your hand, reaching for his hair very slowly, giving him more than enough time to expect your touch and not be surprised by it. After checking the now short hair, you smiled at him and left the room.

Henry frowned, confused but you came back a moment later with a stool in your hands. You grabbed the pair of scissors on the sink, found a comb and guided him to sit on the chair.

“What are you doing?”

“Well...I'm going to finish cutting your hair!” you said matter-of-factly, fingers brushing through his now short locks. “You’ve done a great job, love. It’s almost even” you added, still playing with his hair.

It was a strange but welcomed feeling. He was still getting used to someone’s touch not being associated with danger and violence. You always treated him with utter tenderness, your fingers brushing over skin like feathers.

You gave a few more snips to even up the back then moved to the front.

“How short do you want it?”

For a second, the man found himself incapable to answer, just staring at you. He quickly cleared his throat, answering:

“Like I used to have it.”

You nodded, getting back to your task. You only needed some time to make sure it was good enough, checking on both sides with your fingers if the strands were equal.

“You’re all done!” you announced with a satisfied smile

You walked back behind him, allowing Henry to see his new haircut as you gently dusted off the few hair that had fallen on his shoulders.

“So...what do you think? I know it’s not exactly perfect but we can-”

“It is. It’s perfect, thank you, love”

Your gaze met his in the mirror and you smiled. You couldn’t help your heart missing a beat at the pet name, your body filling up with a strange yet familiar warmth. How long has it been since you felt that way?

You quickly recomposed yourself, arranging the hair falling on his brow and Henry closed his eyes for a second. You were so close he could smell the remnants of your perfume mixed with the cream you enjoyed putting on your hands before bed.

He had dreamt of this peculiar scent every night and day while he was away. Every time the metallic odor of blood combined with the gore smell of death and mud would reach his nose, he would close his eyes and think about how comforting you smelt like. He would imagine a lush garden with all kinds of roses and peonies and lilies instead of fresh soil and gun powder. And now he didn’t have to make it up in his mind anymore, he could just breath it in, bring you closer and let it engulf him.

“Henry? Everything alright?”

His eyes flickered back to reality and he took your hand, bringing it closer to his lips. He left a soft kiss there, sending a shiver through your arm, all the way down your spine. He got up and as surprised as you were, wrapped his arms around you. It took you a moment to register what was happening but quickly, you embraced him back as he rested his head in the crook of your neck, inhaling deeply.

“Thank you.” He whispered, his voice muffled by your skin.

He wasn’t talking about the haircut anymore. And you knew that. But more words weren’t necessary so you kissed his head, running your hand on his back, holding him a little bit longer.

As Henry kept a tight hold on you, a small smile stretched his lips. It had been a long time since the last time he felt like smiling but he happily welcomed it.

He was ready to welcome the life ahead of him, where there will be more reasons to smile, where he could hope for more laughter and happiness for your family. Hope for a new beginning.

[anvael]

COME HOME TO MY HEART.

rating: T | relationships: robin buckley/nancy wheeler | modern au

they meet in a small, shabby bar on a chilly, october night.

nancy is exhausted and freezing to death because seattle’s weather does not treat her right. it wrecks her insides and makes her want to vomit, with its awful drizzle that never stops and gray clouds that have taken the sky’s place a long time ago. since she came here, there hasn’t been a single day when the sun was shining for more than two hours. it’s so gloomy and damp and she can swear that at least half of her friends would agree that the weather here perfectly reflects her personality.

seattle sucks and consequently so does she.

it is half past nine when her cold hand reaches a metal handle of a huge, green, wooden door with a dirty window covered with half-scratched stickers that makes an entrance to some local bar she has never heard of before. she’s been running in the rain for the past fifteen minutes, looking for a place to stay until the weather calms down and if she only had more determination inside her, she would for sure find something better, but the water in her shoes does not allow her to even dream about different possibilities. as soon as soaked with cigarettes' smoke’s smell, stuffy air hits her nostrils, she’s certain that this is not a place she wanted to end up in, but a bell above her head rings pretty loudly, making sure that everyone there knows that she’s arrived. nancy wheeler hates little things like this, unnecessarily loud and not cute at all, just useless. hawkins’ stores used to be full of them. she tries to take a quick look around before anybody starts looking at her weirdly and god forbid comes near her asking about anything. the place is not even that crowded, a little bit loud of course, but she can see a few lonely tables in the corners. it’s dark in there, the windows on the right wall do not comply with their duties at all, which makes them as useless as the stupid bell.  perfect .

her first step forward causes the floor to creak so loud that she starts to wonder how old the place actually is and how it managed to not collapse for that long. she’s sure that if she was a different person the sound would charm her, make her wonder how many people stepped their feet there before, how many insanely wonderful stories happened here, it would’ve filled her heart with a need to text her friends and ramble about how they have to visit it. has anyone ever proposed to the love of their life inside a small seattle bar she’s standing in right now? how many first dates did take place here? but nancy doesn’t wonder, she shakes off the feeling and moves forward to place her order and get it over with, hoping the rain will pass at least for a while so she can come back to her flat dry. as soon as she looks up she notices the music playing in the background. they play some 2010s playlist which is so  not like seattle. the music is fun, lively and reminds her of her high school years. but the city makes her feel like she hasn’t been home in ages in the worst way possible. it’s not a nice nostalgia, it’s the feeling of longing and loneliness wrapping around her bones, shaking her muscles and overflowing her brain making it tremble from the sadness.

she takes a look at the huge menu that's hanging on the wall behind the bar. they serve almost everything that contains alcohol, from beer through whiskey to vodka and only a few other options for those who don’t want to get drunk on a monday evening.

it reminds her of a roadhouse in the suburbs back home. the one with a broken window and old rusty, chevy impala with flat tires parked in front of it since the 80s. there was a time when her dad felt particularly adventurous, probably because of a mid-life crisis, and wanted to buy the old thing. he dreamt of renovating it and taking the whole family on a country road trip. but her mother loved hawkins too much.

“what can i get you?” an unfamiliar voice drags her from her own thoughts.

READ MORE ON AO3.

[jaceyneedsabetterusername]

Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing

Pairings: Arvin Russel x Fem!Christian!Reader

Summary: Arvin knew he shouldn’t have left you alone with that new preacher... 

Warnings: Sexual assault, physical assault, cursing, Teagarden being a perv, really nothing out of the ordinary for this movie. 

Word Count: 5250

_________________________

“Arvin! Stop!” You giggled, pushing your boyfriend off of you as he nibbled up and down your neck. There wasn’t anything sexual about it, he just loved to hear you laugh and he knew how much the action tickled your skin. “You’re so annoyin’!” You laughed, cheeks flushed red as you gently pressed on his head to try and move it. 

He pressed himself up, looking down at you like you were the most beautiful thing he’d ever lay his eyes on. Arvin was straddling you, his knees trapping your hips beneath him. A hand was placed on either side of your head and he looked down at you, “But you’re so pretty when you laugh.” 

“Oh? And I’m ugly all the rest of the time?” You asked jokingly, hands reaching up stroke up and down his arms. 

Arvin leaned down, pressing a gentle kiss to your lips before pulling away ever so slightly, hovering just above your lips. Both of your guys’ eyes were still closed as if it were a romantic moment until he whispered, “Ugly as a mule.” 

You both busted up laughing and you shoved him, his body rolling onto the blanket beside you, “I’m breaking up with you.” You teasingly told him. 

“Ah, c’mon. You know you love me.” He looked over at you, loving how the autumn sun lit up your features. 

“I tolerate you. Don’t get it mixed up.” You rolled your head over to see him already admiring you. Your smile got bigger when you locked eyes with him. 

“Well I love you.” Arvin admitted sweetly, bringing a gentle hand to your cheek and kissing you one more time. 

Arvin made you feel beautiful and special and safe, all those things that no boy had ever made you feel. He always had. Even when you were children back in middle school and neither of you really talked to each other, when you saw him around the halls, a peace just settled over you that made you feel like you were on top of the world. When the two of you began dating ten months ago, that never changed. 

“I love you too.” 

The two of you laid back against the yellow blanket with little orange flowers on it, the one that you’d taken from the linen closet back home. This was yours and Arvin’s favorite place, a little clearing in the woods. The grass was tall enough to be soft but not so tall that it hid critters. Flowers lined the edge of the woods in the spring. It wasn’t springtime now but that only meant that instead of a display of white and yellow flower buds, the pair of you had a beautiful show of brilliant reds and oranges from the falling leaves. 

Everyone in town knew you were together. Word spread fast around Coal Creek and it was nearly impossible to hide anything. Your families were both supportive of the relationship. Emma loved that you were involved with the church and put effort into the community when you could, often participating in bake sales around town. She liked to tease that you won Arvin over with your “man catching apple cobbler” as she now called it, since he officially asked you to be his girlfriend over a slice of the delicious dessert after a Sunday service. 

Your parents liked Arvin as well. Even after Fred Dinwoodie had told your dad about what Arvin had done to Gene, it surprisingly made him like Arvin more. “You got yourself a good man who knows right from wrong and ain’t afraid to stand up for the people he loves.” Was what he’d said, which had surprised you. You knew that Arvin had beaten all the boys right after he’d done it, since he came to you to help him calm down and ice his knuckles. You were terrified for your parents to find out, though, sure that they’d tell you to break up with him for fear of violent tendencies. Thankfully, that day never came. 

It was nice out there, bundled up in a warm brown coat, laying on Arvin’s chest, and watching the leaves fly across the crisp sky in the breeze. 

“We should probably get headin’ back.” You said reluctantly, pushing yourself up to sitting. 

“Why’s that?” Arvin perched on his elbow to watch you tighten the jacket around your frame, a cool breeze hitting just right. 

“The new preacher asked me to come by this afternoon. Said he needed help planning a fundraiser to raise money for the less fortunate families in town.” You traced a finger over his knuckles gingerly, small pink marks littering his knuckles from his attack on Dinwoodie and his boys still healing over. 

“Ain’t you one o’ them less fortunate families in town?” He asked, trying to find a way to talk you out of this. Ever since Preston Teagarden had humiliated Emma on his first day, Arvin had it out for the man. 

You scoffed with a chuckle, “Yeah, but you are too and your grandma is still always bringin’ stuff to church. Just cause I’m broke as shit doesn’t mean I can’t try to help other people who are broke as shit.”

Arvin stood up with you and helped you fold up the blanket, “I just don’t like that new preacher. Somethin’s off about ‘im.” 

“I agree that he was totally out of line callin’ your grandma out like that two weeks ago but I’d like to think that maybe I can talk to him about it.” The two of you began to walk back to Arvin’s car, grass swishing under your steps. 

Arvin’s face twisted, “I just don’t trust the man. He’s always up there on that damn stage actin’ all high ‘n mighty every Sunday like he ain’t done nothin’ wrong.” He reached forward and opened your door for you, closing it after you slid onto the seat. He walked around the car and got into the driver’s seat. 

“He’s a sinner like the rest of us. It’s just about doing what you can to make yourself better.” You responded, looking over at Arvin sweetly. He gave you a skeptic look and sighed deeply as he turned his attention back to look towards the road. With one hand on the steering wheel, he slid his free hand over to hold yours gently. The rest of the drive was in comfortable silence, with the exception of the radio quietly playing in the background. 

Arvin loved you. He really really loved you. You generally had your wits about you, a heck of a lot more than most of the girls in Coal Creek, not allowing your religion to totally cloud your vision. You were a good girl, good enough to make his grandma happy and not cause too much trouble around town, always helping those in need, but not so pious that you made everyone else around you feel like a sinner. You were still fun, you still made mistakes. Arvin felt like you were something between ethereal and real, somehow elevating him as a person but also showing him just how good life could be. 

Nevertheless, he couldn’t help but feel like you were making a mistake with this preacher. Of course, with your caring nature, you would help him, especially knowing it was for the poor folks in town. But something about Teagarden just made Arvin’s skin crawl. He just couldn’t put his finger on it… 

The tires rolled to a crunching halt on the gravel outside of the church. The graveyard to the side looked dark and gloomy as always, the cloud of loss looming over almost everyone in this town in one way or another. The church, though, stood small and humble in the field, white paint chipping after years of weathering. 

“Thank you for the ride.” You leaned over and pecked Arvin on the cheek. 

He let out a heavy sigh, “You really sure you don’t just want me to take you home?” 

You rolled your eyes at him with a sweet smile on your face, “Yes, I’m sure. It’ll be fine, Arv, but thank you for the concern.” Opening the door, you climbed out, “I’ll see you tomorrow?” 

“What? No. I’m givin’ you a ride home.” Arvin looked offended that you even suggested such blasphemy. 

“I don’t want you to have to drive all the way back here for me and I don’t know how long this’ll take. Besides, I don’t live too far from here.” You shook your head, leaning against the open door.

Arvin raised his eyebrows, “What kind of man would I be if I let you walk home alone at night? I’m givin’ you a ride home ‘n that’s final. I have to run to the market anyways to get some stuff for my grandma so I’ll just do that ‘n come back here for ya.” 

With loving warmth welling up in your chest, you leaned into the car, holding onto the roof for balance, while you kissed him on the lips, “I’ll see you in a few then.” 

Pulling yourself back out of the car, you closed the door and waved before spinning to walk towards the church. Looking behind you, you gave Arvin one final wave before disappearing through the door. 

The church was empty, though you expected nothing less on a Saturday afternoon. The pews were empty so you wandered into the building curiously. You closed the door behind you as you walked further in. “Hello? Reverend?” 

Preston Teagarden approached from the door off to the side of the main stage, where his office had been located, “Y/N! Forgive me, I expected you to be a little bit later.” 

You stopped in your tracks, “Oh, I’m sorry! You didn’t say an exact time. Just afternoon…” You chuckled awkwardly, suddenly feeling bad for arriving early. 

“No, no, it’s no problem at all,” He waved his hand dismissively. Teagarden made his way down the aisle a few rows before stopping, “So from what I’ve heard, you are the one to talk to about fundraising” 

Flattered, your cheeks turned a light shade of pink, “Oh, well I don’t know about that… I’ve done a few fundraisers but I wouldn’t say I’m the one to go to.” 

“Nonsense, girl! I’m sure you’ll help plan something amazing. Now, why don’t you come over here and we can start talking about it.” He gestured towards the pew he was leaning on and waited for you to sit down before sliding in next to you. 

Your legs crossed when you sat down, “So, I was thinking about this for a few days and the high school has a harvest festival every November. If we set up a bake sale, we could easily raise a few hundred dollars, at least. Everybody loves Mrs. Lyle’s lemon bars and I’m sure those alone could rake in a small fortune.” You giggled a little at your small joke and the preacher did as well. 

As he did so, his arm slid behind your shoulder so smoothly, you almost didn’t notice at first. Almost. Though the action took you off guard, you chose to write it off. People had done this before to you platonically so this probably didn’t mean anything. Just a show of interest in what you had to say. 

“Mmm, you’re makin’ me crave some sweets,” Teagarden chuckled, looking over his shoulder and then back around the room. 

“Well I can guarantee that you won’t be disappointed. Coal Creek ain’t got much but if we got one thing, it’s some mighty good bakers.” You dug around in your bag that you’d brought, searching for the journal that you’d been planning this event out on, “I actually did some math and I was thinking… we could charge a dime per cookie or a dollar a dozen, yeah? And then maybe a quarter for a slice of pie and then a dollar twenty five for-” 

The preacher stopped you, placing his hand on the notebook, “You really thought this out, huh? You sure are one smart girl there, Y/N. You go to the high school?”

The older man had scooched closer to you sometime during your ramblings and suddenly, you began to feel suffocated by his presence. His body was nearly flush against yours and his arm around your shoulders were trapping. 

He’s a preacher, he wouldn’t do nothin’, you tried to convince yourself but Arvin’s voice came ringing in your ears: I just don’t like that new preacher. Somethin’s off about ‘im. Trying not to be obvious, just in case you were misreading things, you slid away from him just slightly to put some distance between your bodies. As you did so, however, Teagarden’s hand closed around your left shoulder, rubbing it firmly but gently. 

Your eyes widened when you looked over at his grip and your heart began to pick up pace. “Yeah.” Your voice was shakier than you thought it would be. 

“What are ya? Junior, senior? You look young… but definitely not a little girl.” His eyes raked tactically over your body. Your legs were shaped out well in your cuffed denim jeans and your white and pink striped boat neck long sleeve shirt was far from revealing but Preston was well aware of the way the stripes curved out of place over your breasts. 

“Senior. I’ll be graduating this June.” Now your voice was solid and low, just teetering on threatening. 

The preacher smiled, “Ah, ain’t that exciting. Such a smart pretty little thing going out into the real world. It’s good to see a nice Christian girl going out there but y’know, the real world is real bad. Believe you me. You gotta be real careful out there. Temptation and sin ‘round every corner. The devil hides himself, y’know? Wraps up all his evil and disguises it as everythin’ you ever wanted.” 

“A wolf in sheep’s clothing.” You stated quietly but firmly, looking up to lock eyes with him. Arvin was right. Something was certainly off about this man and you were becoming more and more uncomfortable by the second. 

Preston smiled proudly, “That’s right. Now, you gotta make sure you ain’t fallin’ into any o’ his traps.” 

Your jaw clenched and your eyes darted around the room before landing in your lap, “I’d like to think I got a good ‘nough head on my shoulders to see Satan working in disguise.” 

He tsked, “That’s a good start but you can’t go relyin’ on your own knowledge of the world. You need to let God tell you what’s right ‘n wrong. Trust in Him.” His hand on your shoulder shook you slightly for emphasis while his other pointed upwards towards Heaven. 

There was a brief moment of silence in which you could have heard a pin drop before he spoke again, “How is your walk with God?” 

You looked over at him with narrowed eyes, “It’s alright. Could be better but everyone’s could, I s’pose.” 

“I agree,” Preston’s leg started bouncing and he looked towards the front of the church, where he typically stood preaching, “E’ryone could walk a little closer. Myself included.” He gestured to the front of the church, “Why don’t we pray? C’mon over here.” 

He stood up and walked up to the head of the room, just below the cross. Cautiously, you followed him. “I like to think as a man of God, I can do some of His work. Or rather put the good word out there and try to save as many souls as possible. Why don’t you get on your knees? Lemme pray for ya.” 

A shiver ran through your spine as you knelt down on shaky knees, eyes going up to the large black cross that hung on the wall. Please, Lord, get me out of this. You prayed silently. 

Preston stood behind you, his hands coming to your shoulders as he began, “Lord, today we pray for Y/N and her excursions into the world as a young woman. Help her see through the devil’s delusions and guide her through this world. Lord, I pray that you see Y/N in everything that she is as she dedicates her whole self to you. Give her strength, amen.” 

“Amen.” When your eyes slid open, your whole body was shaking. 

“So you say you got some good judgement?” Preston asked as you stood up, “Say you walk in the light?” 

“I try to but we all have our slip ups.” You answered humbly and honestly, avoiding his eye contact. 

Preston hummed, “I seen you with that Russell boy. Y’all going steady?” Silently, you nodded in response. “There’s a lot of temptation in relationships like that.” 

It was clear what he was insinuating and it actually made you mad. What right did he have to be poking around in your romantic and sexual life? “Has he ever touched you?” 

The bluntness of his question hit you like a rock, “With all do respect, Reverend, that ain’t really none of your business.” 

He put his hands up in surrender, “I don’t mean to pry. I’m just concerned ‘bout that boy dragging you down into temptation. Sullying your position with the good Lord, ‘n all.” 

“Arvin is a perfectly respectful man. He ain’t draggin’ nothin’ or nobody down.” Your voice was getting more aggressive. 

“So he hasn’t touched you? He hasn’t seen you…” 

Your eyebrows furrowed, “Like I said, that ain’t none of your business. Thank you for your concern for my soul but what Arvin and I do is between us and the Lord. I don’t need no middle man reverend to redeem me.” 

He shrugged, “But you know, one of the best ways to get right with the Lord is to surrender yourself. Fully.” He took a few steps towards you and your breathing hitched. There was a sexual tension in the air that made your skin crawl. 

“I’ve already given my life to the Lord.” 

You weren’t giving in quite as easily as Preston had expected. Those other girls, Lenora and Jeanette Reaster, had been easily manipulated into giving Preston what he wanted. Just tell them they were unclean and needed to get right with the Lord and right into his trap they fell but you… you were different. Smart in the worldy kind of way. You were the first girl to give him a hard time but Preston would be lying if he said he didn’t like the chase. 

You were staring daggers at him, your jaw clenched, and your body standing tall and strong. It was almost as if you were trying to prove a point. You could have run, could have darted out screaming about what had happened, but you didn’t. There was no proof and Preston knew it. This was how he got away with it all. No proof, all words and small touches that were just innocent enough to be misread. It wasn’t until he got them in the backseat of his car or in the office in the back of the church that he actually touched them but by then, it was consensual. Sure, for Lenora and Jeanette there was the issue that they were minors but that was the fun of these little towns like Coal Creek, The girl always took the fall. It was always her fault. Preston could get off scotch free and he knew it. He loved it. 

Almost like something out of a movie, he reached down and gently settled one hand on your hip and the other on your cheek, pressing his lips against yours without giving you a chance to object. You yelled indignantly against lips but when he pulled away, the hand on your cheek moved to cover your mouth. Preston leaned in close to your ear and whispered, “I am an extension of the Lord’s work. Surrender yourself to me fully to surrender yourself to Him.” 

** 

Arvin watched as you walked into the church with a distrusting pang in his gut. There was just something about that reverend that didn’t sit right. It killed him to watch you leave, knowing that you were alone in there with him.

But he also knew you were a big girl. The logical part of his brain kept screaming at him that he was being irrational. The reverend was probably an okay enough guy. He’d never be number one or even number twenty on Arvin’s list of favorite people but that didn’t necessarily mean that the preacher would kill your something. Besides, Arvin really did need to run to the market. Lenora had requested some pecans for a pie she wanted to bake and his grandma  needed more milk. It would be a quick trip as town was just a short drive down the street. 

Reluctantly, Arvin backed out the driveway and sped off down the street. 

The entire time that Arvin was at the market, there was an unsettling tingle all around his body. It got harder to ignore as more time passed. The longer he left you with Teagarden, the worse he felt. 

“Just these.” Arvin threw a bag of pecans and a gallon of milk on the counter and paid for it quickly, rushing back to his car. He wouldn’t be having these feelings for no reason. Best case scenario, you were absolutely fine and Arvin was just being paranoid. Worst case scenario… Arvin couldn’t think about it because every time he thought of one, another worse one popped into his brain. 

It had only been about twenty minutes since Arvin left you alone with the preacher. Honestly, he wasn’t sure how long planning a fundraiser would take. Church activities had never been his thing but he supported you as long as it made you happy. 

He sat in the car in the church parking lot, lighting up a cigarette to calm his nerves. Arvin’s leg bounced anxiously as he watched yet another late autumn storm roll in. The clouds cast a dark gloominess, turning the minimal light left from the mostly set sun a shade of grey.. There Arvin sat for another five minutes, awaiting your exit from the building but it never came. 

Fuck it. Arvin twisted his hat on straight and threw the door open, nearly stomping out. He couldn’t put his finger on it but something was wrong. He could feel it. 

Sure enough, when he threw the door open, he was horrified. Preston Teagarden had you locked in a tight embrace, his hands running over your breasts. The two of you were standing in the middle of the aisle, right in the center of church. You had a furious look on your face, “I swear to God you touch me like that again and I’ll cut your damn dick off!” You gripped desperately at his hand that was groping you, trying to pry it away but to no avail. 

The sound of the door swinging open was enough to draw both yours and Teagarden’s attention. “Get your fuckin’ hands off her!” Arvin wasted no time running into the conflict. Teagarden dropped you and your knees buckled from the unexpected action, landing you on the ground. 

He put his hands up in surrender, “Hey, now, let’s talk about this like real men.” 

Arvin threw one solid swing to his chin, sending his head flying sideways, “You ain’t no real man. Real men don’t gotta go around gropin’ girls to get off, you sick fuck!” Another punch landed on his opposite cheek and it sent Teagarden to the ground. 

You scurried away from him and stood up just ahead of Arvin. Preston cowered, hiding his face, “Please, please, have mercy.” His pleading eyes went from Arvin to you and he lingered on your gaze, knowing that he had a better chance with the mercy approach with you. 

He found none. Even with his blood smeared face, his teeth stained crimson, and the way his body shook, you just scowled down at him, “I’m gonna tell e’ryone in this town what a disgustin’ man you are. You think you can get away with this, you’re dead wrong.” You sent a swift kick straight to his stomach, making him curl into the fetal position with a loud groan of pain. 

But then he laughed. He actually laughed. 

“What’s so damn funny?” You and Arvin both spat in unison, blood boiling. 

Preston laid his head back and closed his eyes, an almost serene look of confidence contrasting the blood that covered him and the swelling of his lip, “Ain’t nothin’ gonna happen to me. You came to visit the church after hours under the guise of helping me with a fundraiser. But then you used your womanly charms to try and seduce me, a married man of God.” 

“That ain’t what happened!” Arvin yelled angrily, fists clenched by his side. 

When the words left the preacher’s mouth though, your heart dropped. You knew the truth, Arvin knew the truth, the reverend knew the truth. But none of that mattered if the Reverend told everyone his concocted story because he was a man of God. Why would he lie? 

A sadistic smile spread across his face, “It is if I say it is. Ain’t nobody gonna believe two teenagers over a preacher.” 

“He’s right.” Your voice faltered as you spoke, nearly coming out as a shattered whisper. When Arvin looked over at you, your face had paled and you looked utterly broken. 

It wasn’t so much that the assault itself was enough to break you, though, of course, it had definitely left you with the lingering ghosts of his filthy hands on your body. It was the fact that you knew he’d get away with it, that no matter what you or Arvin said, the town would believe Teagarden. 

Arvin swallowed hard, trying to see through the blinding rage. As a boy, he never truly understood the bias that women faced when they were victims of sexual assault- how it was perceived as their faults in towns like this. It had never happened to anyone he knew so he never had much reason to think about it. Now, you were forced to live with knowing that you assailant was going to keep his position as a fucking preacher in town and that you couldn’t do anything about it. 

Arvin wouldn’t let it stand. 

He stomped forward yet again and knelt over Teagarden, sending blow after blow into his face. Bone crunched bone with a disgusting crack with every hit and you flinched every time. 

Your eyes were wide with terror. Arvin’s violent past with Gene Dinwoodie and his boys was not unknown to you. You were the first person he’d gone to after the attack, in fact, and you’d actually supported him for the most part, only wishing that maybe he didn’t send them all to the hospital and only roughed them up a bit. Actually watching him beat someone to the brink of death though was something else entirely. 

“Stop!” The word left your mouth before you even knew you’d thought it. 

Arvin stopped and looked over his shoulder at you in surprise. He was doing this for you after all. 

“Don’t kill ‘im. Please.” You begged, your voice heavy.

“What?” Arvin wasn’t actually sure what he’d intended on doing to the preacher. Sure, he wanted to kill him. That horrified, angry look in your eye as he touched you made a fire burn in him so bright, he didn’t know if it could be put out. But Arvin had never wanted to be a killer. He only wanted to prove a point and make sure that the message stuck. Now that he thought about it, though, he would have to finish the job or the preacher would tell him he’d attacked him. 

Your eyes were almost brimming with tears, though none fell. This whole evening had been too much. First the assault and now watching the love of your life throw his good conscience away for you. You wanted the preacher to pay as much as he did but this just didn’t feel right. 

“P-please… I don’t want you takin’ the fall for none o’ this. He don’t deserve to die but I think a good beatin’ will give him some time to reevaluate ‘imself.” You’d walked towards Arvin and placed a warm hand on his shoulder. 

Arvin couldn’t fathom why you’d be protecting this monster. The question was clear all over his face. Why? 

“I’m not asking you to stop for him. I’m asking you to stop for you. I don’t want you to have blood on your hands for me. Not for this.” His heart broke seeing you look the way you did, your eyes shining with tears, and your hand a little shaky. The last thing he wanted was to hurt you more. 

Arvin grabbed the preacher off the ground by the collar and pulled him up almost a foot, leaning down to get in his disfigured face, “If I ever hear that you went near Y/N or any other girl again, I will find you and kill you. If you so much as look at her again, I will kill you. And if you tell anyone what happened here tonight, I will fucking kill you. You understand? Consider it that mercy you kept beggin’ for.” 

He dropped the preacher gracelessly with a thud and wrapped an arm comfortingly around you. For a moment, he was scared that you’d flinch away. You’d never seen him when he let his anger get the best of him and he preferred to keep it that way. He didn’t want you to think that he was a violent man because he really wasn’t. Arvin just cared for a special few so much that he’d do anything for them. He’d never hurt someone he loved though and needed you to know that. 

Thankfully, you leaned into his touch, resting your head on his shoulder as he walked you back to his car, leaving the preacher an unconscious mess in the middle of the church. When you exited the building, night had fallen upon Coal Creek, casting a fitting darkness over the town. 

“Thank you.” You said simply and quietly, looking over at Arvin sincerely on the drive home. 

“For what?” 

“For everything. Just bein’ who you are.” You paused with a heavy sigh, “But promise me something?” 

Arvin looked over at you, taking his eyes off the road for just a second to show you he was listening. 

“Promise me you won’t go gettin’ yourself in trouble for me.” 

He shook his head, “He deserved-” 

“I know what he deserved,” You interrupted, “And I am so grateful that you stepped in to help. But I don’t want you gettin’ yourself thrown in jail or killed for me.” 

There was short silence before Arvin looked over with the most sincere look you think he’d ever given you, “I can’t promise that. ‘M sorry, Y/N, but if I ever see you in danger, I’m gonna do what I need to do.” 

It wasn’t the response you’d been hoping for but this boy had the ability to make you feel more loved than anyone else you knew. You only wished he understood that you only wanted what was best for him, just like he did for you. “I love you, Arvin.” You admitted, sliding across the seat to lay your head against his shoulder while he drove. 

“I love you too.” 

[lostbbygorl]

LEVI ACKERMAN WITH AN ADOPTED BABYGIRL:

✨So let's say Levi finds an abandoned baby crying somehow on a mission. He takes a close look at the baby in the basket, and tries to ignore it. He fails

✨ He can't turn his back on an infant, but at the same time, he doesn't know shit about parenting

✨ He sucks it up and decides to take the baby back to the castle. By then, the poor baby has fallen asleep she's so tired.

✨ The 104th cadets are giggling and cooing at the baby and he very grumpily tells them to shut up because he doesn't want the baby to wake up

✨ Hange is just gushing because Levi looks 100x more attractive with a baby resting on his chest

✨ He takes the baby back to the room and just...stares at her

✨ Levi: 👁👄👁

✨ He decides that he's gonna put her up for adoption, but he's too busy to do so, so he has to raise the baby...somehow

✨ The HQ is no place for babies obviously, but with the combined braincells of Hange Zoe, Erwin Smith, and the 104th cadets, they'll be raising Isabel Ackerman, the most badass baby of all

✨ Badass cause Levi has "seen great potential in the crying brat"

✨ So little Isabel, as Levi named him, sleeps in his room on the other side of the bed

✨ Levi is usually busy, so he can't always take care of Isabel. He usually assigns cadets or other subordinates to keep an eye on Isabel when he isn't around. He would only ask Hange if it was absolutely necessary

✨ When Levi is around, he checks the baby's schedule that he made. He knows when to give her milk, and he's good about cleaning too because he wants the baby hygienic though her shit smells bad

✨ Levi hates to admit it, but he's grown verryyy attached to little Isabel after the first one month of adopting her

✨ Levi rants to her after a tired day, and he walks around with her in his arms

✨ He softly sings to her at night when she is particularly energetic past her bedtime because Isabel finds his deep voice soothing

✨ Levi and Isabel couldn't be more opposite!

✨ The baby is warm and bright and just hyper all the time. Isabel is always laughing and she LOVES the attention everyone in HQ gives her

✨ Levi's only complaint is that she's tiring sometimes

✨ Isabel finds Levi's annoyance HILARIOUS! If Levi grumbles at her or curses under his breath, she'll start giggling uncontrollably. This ofc, melts Levi's heart

✨ Levi also reads to little Isabel, who ofc, knows nothing about politics or battle but is still listening intently to Levi's every word

✨ He also likes to poke her cheeks and kiss her forehead. Never in public doe

✨ Levi checks on Isabel every break he gets

✨ Someone made a mini Survey Corps uniform for her, and Isabel loved it. It's one of Levi's fave things in the whole world

✨ Levi has given her tea at one point tbh

✨ Hange very loudly exclaims when she sees Isabel and Levi tells her to stfu

✨ Hange always gets Isabel flowers, and well, she rants to Isabel and rambles to her about scientific discoveries on titans

✨ Actually, EVERYONE rants to Isabel

✨ " Isabel, Horseface over there kept screwing up his ODM positions and he put the blame on me. HOW IS THAT FAIR?"- Tatacaw

✨ Erwin also has a soft spot for Isabel, but he's busier than Levi, so he can't see his goddaughter as much as he wants to

✨ He still gets her presents and shit

✨ Erwin sometimes lets Isabel sit on his lap while he's sketching. Levi does the same

✨ As for the cadets, well, they'd bury you alive if you even LOOKED at Isabel funny

✨ They dote on her all the time

✨ One of the main reasons they're so dedicated to saving humanity is so Isabel has a better life than them. They voiced it and Levi was super touched but his face remained 😐

✨ Levi lets all of the cadets play with Isabel, but there must ALWAYS be supervision with: Connie, Eren, Floch, Sasha, and Jean

✨ Isabel's usual babysitters are: Armin, Mikasa, and Historia before her coronation

✨ Mikasa likes kids, and so does Armin. Also, Armin is just smart and reads a lot so he started reading up on babies as soon as Isabel became a part of the family. Mikasa and Armin were the biggest helps and Levi is eternally grateful to them

✨ Historia still sends Isabel presents and comes to visit her when she's free

✨ Connie and Sasha know how to make Isabel choke on laughter. They always argue about who Isabel likes better, but little do they know, Isabel is whipped for Jean (aren't we all?)

✨ Jean's tall height is amazing to little Isabel, and she loves sitting on his shoulders

✨ Eren likes to sit her on his lap and bitch about Jean to her

✨ Literally all the cadets are more worried about Isabel's safety than the actual expedition before the expedition

✨ Isabel has personal guards lmao

✨ Overall, she's a breath of fresh air in this dark world for Levi. She brings colors and joy into his gloomy life

✨ And she also brings plenty of "googooogagagaehdi23gf83" to the planning table

[bimsha]

Head in Her Heart (Kuroo Tetsuro x Reader)

Warning : Mentions of Suicide, Violence and Major Character Death. Read at Your Own Risk. Don't tell I Didn't Warn You. If You Are Sensitive About These Topics, Please Refrain From Reading.

"'Cause it's easier to keep holdin' on to something sweet In her mind the more he lies, she justifies But why?"

Song: Head In Her Heart - Nico Collins

Tetsuro Kuroo had come a long way in his life. His love for volleyball has made him the man he was. He patted against his wristwatch a few times, he had an hour before he had to attend the meeting. He didn’t want to arrive early and sit by himself in that gloomy meeting room and not be ready to drink the stale coffee they serve in those places. Kuroo decided to cross the road and head to the nearest café. He missed breakfast and it felt like a good chance for him to grab some food. Ordering his food, he walked to the nearest table just beside the front window of the place. One of the workers brought his food and he was certainly surprised by their speed. Not every day you get to meet good workers and fast service. He smiled at her, turning back to his food when a movement caught from the nook of his eye. He turned and registered the familiarity. A young woman, possibly around his age sat by herself in the far corner of the café. Her hair draped against her shoulder as her eyes darted along with the menu in her hands.

It didn’t take Kuroo much longer to recognize her. She hasn’t changed much since High School. “Y/n?” He talked, waving his hand a bit to take her attention. She looked up from the menu and turned to him. Her eyes frowning for a second before the recognition flooded in. She smiled. The same smile he had grown to love through his high school years. She stood up and walked over to his table without hesitance. The raven-haired male gestured to the seat in front of him. “It’s been so long,” She said, her smile still painted on her lips. It was only then he realized, maybe she did have changed a bit.

“It has” Kuroo replied, tapping against his lukewarm coffee. “I thought you moved to America. That’s what the rumours said anyway.”

She paused for a minute to smile at the waitress who brought her order and thanked her. “I did move to America but I came back a few months after.”

“Oh” Kuroo wondered about the reasons. He still remembered how she was excited to start a new life back in America. In their post-graduate ceremony at high school, she looked at him right in the eyes when she confessed her dream to be a fashion designer. Kuroo wished her luck and let go of her, wishing her best. She had always been the kind of girl to follow her dreams. The kind of girl who wanted to live her dream, not just thinks of it. “America didn’t sit right with you?” He asked, his tone light. He didn’t want to build up any tension between them.

“Kind of.” She was staring at her drink, he noticed. She had been avoiding eye contact since she came to speak with him. That was peculiar. As he remembered, she always used to look anyone in the eye. There was never malice in them, but the positive energy that could light up anyone’s day. Gosh, he was being sappy again. Their light-hearted conversation continued until a man walked into their table. He looked at her and frowned.

“Y/n?”

She stood up with a smile. “Right! Kuroo this is my fiancé, Fujino Toru, and Toru this a high school friend of mine, Kuroo Tetsuro.”

He extended his hand for Kuroo to take. But the only thought going inside his mind was that: she was going to get married. “Nice to meet you,” He said in a stiff voice.

Toru merely nodded, his dark eyes giving him a judging glare. Kuroo stood his ground as he stared back at him with the same stoic look. Y/n seem to be clueless about the tense situation. “Were you two close friends?” Toru asked with a smile, aiming the question at her.

She just ducked her head that her bangs bounced over her forehead, “We were more like acquaintances. He was a good volleyball player. He was always inside the gym”

“Oh,” Toru said, raising his brow.

Kuroo simply shrugged as his response. Toru wrapped one of his arms around her leading her towards the café door. Kuroo watched them leave and turned back to his seat, only to see her untouched food and the coffee mug still filled to the brim, not a sip taken.

Seconds turned to minutes, minutes turned to hours and hours passed. Kuroo focused on his job, recruiting members and finding the fresh raw talent in the country. That was something that didn’t change all through all these years. His love for volleyball. He still adored the sport. It had been raining two days straight. He knew it should be past ten in the night when he walked to the car park in the diner. Kuroo worked late and decided to stop by the diner because he knew he’d be too tired to make his inner. The car park was almost empty except for his own SUV and some other black car. He didn’t pay any attention until he heard the voices. It was the aggressive note of a man. Curiously, he turned to them.

It didn’t take a genius to figure out who they were. Especially for Kuroo who had watched her staring out at the window during the English period. Who glanced during the breaks to catch her sweet smile. He frowned, the man was Toru. Did something happen? He thought torn between two worlds. He wondered whether he should ignore them and just leave, Y/n was going to get married and this should be some minor problem. But on the other hand, seeing the rude gestures and the loud voice of Toru, a part of his mind hesitated to go on. Only this time, he promised himself and approached the two. Carefully wearing a smile just to make sure he wasn’t intruding on them. Just spotted them by coincidence. Toru stopped to look at him, “What are you doing here?”

Kuroo put his hands up in surrendering motion. “Just saw you two while passing by, I thought I’d say hello”

He squinted at him and turned to her one last time. “I’m leaving”

Y/n smiled, “Sure and I’m sorry, again”

That’s when Kuroo noticed her swollen cheek. She was holding her hand over it as if to subside the pain. Kuroo immediately turned to Toru who was walking to his car about to call him back when she tugged on his elbow and shook her head. She was still smiling at him, and Kuroo realized what was different about her.

That smile didn’t quite reach her eyes like it used to.

“Y/n” His voice was soft as he talked, “Did he-”

“It’s okay. I did something stupid.” She blinked, slowly running her smooth fingers on her skin. “It’s my fault”

“Huh?”

She shook her head, “Just some business problems, don’t mind it” She pulled out her phone and scrolled through the numbers.

“I can drop you at your house if you want to” He offered, trying to keep his eyes away from her reddened cheeks and tired eyes.

She blinked, “Ah, no, it’s okay. I’ll find a taxi.”

“It’s too late and too dangerous for you to ride alone in a taxi” That idiot should’ve thought about it before leaving you alone here. He didn’t speak the words out loud. “Let’s go”

She reluctantly nodded, following him to his car. As they sat inside, an awkward silence settled between them. Kuro turned on the radio, trying to break the suffocating silence. He wanted to ask her about him. Why did she look so sad? Why did she look so hopeless? “Y/n, should I stop by a pharmacy and get an ice pack for that?”

She shook his head, “It’s fine. I have some at home”

Kuroo nodded, stopping the car by the red light. “Did he-” Kuroo stopped, trying to compose himself. “Does he always do that?”

She didn’t answer right away. There was it, the smile again. “It’s not a big deal”

It is, Kuroo thought.

“It’s my fault. I’m a clumsy person” She laughed a strangled sound.

You were never clumsy, Kuroo thought.

“When did you meet him?” He took a turn as she pointed out the directions.

“It was a proposal by my parents. They wanted to find me the best husband.” There was no cynical tone. She was honest, she always had been.

“Oh,” Kuroo simply said, “You always loved your parents and never complained.”

“You remembered?” She asked, certainly surprised.

I remember everything, “Yeah,” Kuroo said, awkwardly smiling. “You were pretty popular back then”

“Says you” She rolled her eyes, “Girls flocked around you. You were a star in high school, captain”

But I only had my eyes for you.

“Anyway, enough about me. How’s your life? Any girlfriend?” Her voice held the hint of excitement as she asked.

“Already married to Volleyball at this point”

She laughed, “Weren’t you always?”

“Good point,” Kuroo said, chuckling. The conversation continued until they reached her apartment building. They laughed at their past, beautiful high school memories. There will never be a time like that in your life. Life was not too complicated back then. Kuroo waved at her as she walked in. She looked just like the past Y/n at the moment. Her smile reached her eyes.

After that day, both of them kept in touch with each other. Even met in some cafes with several of their other friends back in high school. Everyone was in different places, working with different people but when they got together again, it was the same madness they had in high school.

Kuroo didn’t know when Toru arrived at the shop until he saw him storming to their table. They had organized another get together of high school friends and two of them arrived earlier than expected. Y/n immediately stood, her fact neutral and passive but her eyes glistening with fear. “Toru” Her voice was remarkably calm.

“What are you doing here?” His eyes rested on Kuroo, “With this man?”

She smiled, “We organized a high school get together. We’re waiting for the others.”

“You lying bitch” His voice was quiet but strong. The impact on his words made several of them turn.

“I’m sorry” She murmured.

“It’s not your fault” Kuroo blurted out, “This is a misunderstanding. What are you going to do to her?”

Y/n gave him a surprised glance. Almost as if it was the first time someone had talked for her. She smiled at him, “It’s okay” She muttered, “Let’s go, Toru”

“Yes, we’re leaving” He yelled, taking her wrist as he dragged her out of the door. Kuroo wanted to run after them. He didn’t know what that man was capable of doing to her but he was frozen to the ground as he watched. The girl he once loved, still had feelings for, getting dragged by her fiancé. If this was love, it was a love made in hell. He’s destroying her.

You knew your life wasn’t meant to be smooth. The bruises on your arms were easily covered by long sleeves. In summer, you always gave the same excuse, I get cold easily. When in reality, you were a summer child. You loved the sense of sunlight on your skin. He robbed you of your simple pleasures but you kept holding onto that man. Because you had faith that he will change. Any man could, you’re giving him chances. One after another. Just till you break. Kuroo stumbled again into your life by pure coincidence. He was the one who reminded her of the beautiful past. Those high school years you could never take back.

Toru didn’t favour Kuroo from the start. Sometimes, you sympathized with him. He was insecure about himself, about his abilities to love her. You sighed, pressed one of your hands against the bruises on your wrists. He wondered whether he would ever change. Maybe you’re meant to be with someone like this. You should’ve known before. People like Kuroo was never meant to be with you. He was just so kind and out of your league. He had been like that, always. You smiled at your crush on him back then. You weren’t the only one. Many girls in the class asked him out. You were quite jealous for some time until you learned to let go. Kuroo would never like you. You weren’t meant to spend a beautiful life.

Toru came and went and you stayed back at home for few weeks. He was growing out of his jealousy towards Toru. Jealousy is something toxic. Something that could devour a man out of his positive qualities until their vision tunnels into a murky green smoke. Toru could be a good person, sometimes. He would cuddle with you after work when he was in a good mood, if it was bad, you knew you should stay away. But several blows were inevitable. Sometimes, you wondered whether it was all worth it. Maybe you should fade away. You didn’t know when the feelings started but they seemed like they were here to stay.

When Kuroo called that afternoon, checking up on you. You realized how much you wanted to talk with someone. You have grown sick of your loneliness. You just wanted an outlet. So, you invited him into your apartment out of pure desperation. Trying to find a way to chase the demons growing stronger by each toxic word, each desperate feeling. The bell rang. You walked to the door and opened it to see Kuroo’s face, concerned and caring. You hated yourself for feeling secure in his hold. You weren’t supposed to have feelings for him. Toru was your fiancé. Nevertheless, you invited him in and saw the paper bags in his arms. “Why did you bother?” Your lips painted to a smile but he looked at you as if you are transparent. Almost as if he could see you for the girl you are.

“It’s your favourite sushi. I passed a sushi shop and it reminded me of that ridiculous party we had after graduating”

A smile instantly touched your lips as memories flooded in. It would be amazing to live in past but the sad part of life is you have to move on from those beautiful memories. “Y/n?” He called again, “You’re spacing out”

“Sorry,” You said, inviting him in. “I was thinking about the party”

“Right” Kuro placed the bags on the table. “Wanna have some?”

You didn’t have any appetite. The past few days, you haven’t had any appetite either. You ate just to survive and wondered what it felt like for everything to stop. To stop hurting. To stop loving. To stop thinking. To stop breathing. But his dark eyes made you falter, “Sure” you answered.

You both sat by the dinner table and started to eat. You nibbled at your food, pushing them against your plate. “You have changed” Kuroo observed, showing a piece of fish into his mouth.

“Everyone changes with time.” You said, smiling at him. “But you’re still the same kind guy acting like an old geezer”

“Hey” He objected, “That’s offensive. Aside from all that, Y/n, what’s wrong?”

You stiffened on your seat. Of course, he would notice. They had known each other for so long to point out the differences among them. Maybe, you didn’t ask him to come over because you wanted to talk to him. Maybe, it was because you wanted to see his face one last time. You’ve already given up. “Nothing. I’m fine. Just getting on with life”

Kuroo didn’t look like he believed it and you knew that was a lame excuse. “How’s it going with Toru?”

“It’s okay. He’s trying.”

Kuroo sighed, setting down his chopsticks. “From what I’m seeing, he’s destroying you, Y/n”

You froze, your gaze lingering on your plate. Your heart was racing. It was the raw truth. The truth you wanted to hear. A little hope bubbled inside your chest. Maybe, he’ll save him. “It’s easier though. To hold onto him rather than letting go. Everyone will be there, talking about things, talking about me. It’s a hard life”

Kuroo shook his head, “It’s your life, Y/n. You choose what you want. I think-” He was cut off by the sound of the door opening. Both of you turned in surprised to see Toru, walking up to you two. Kuroo immediately stood up. You just waited, looking at his furious face and raging eyes and wondered, does it matter anymore?

“What’s going on here!?” He let out a ragged cry, grabbing Kuroo by the collars. You sprang onto your feet.

“He was just talking with me. Toru, stop this!” Toru released Kuroo and grabbed you by your hair slamming your face against the side of the table.

“What the fuck-” You heard Kuroo yelling before pushing Toru back and punching him right on the face. “Stop hurting her!” Toru wiped the blood off his nose, switching his glances with you and Kuroo.

“Get out of my house” He yelled at Kuroo.

“No, if I’m leaving, Y/n is coming with me. I don’t trust you anymore” Kuroo was determined. You watched his eyes filling with something unknown. The same look he had when he always stared at you. The look that you weren’t able to understand.

“Leave,” You said, your voice shaking. “I’m okay, I’m sorry”

Kuroo looked at you with reluctance. “But Y/n-” he started when you finally snapped.

“Leave!” You screamed, your throat was dry. Your soul was dry. Your heart was dry. There was nothing to think about anymore. Your life had collapsed right in front of your eyes. You didn’t want Kuroo to be a part of your destruction. He deserved a better life with someone better than you. Hence, you did all that you could, to send him away. For the first time in your life, you yelled at him to leave. Not giving him any other choice than to meet your commands. You watched his hesitant eyes and reluctant steps. Toru couldn’t do anything to you rather than hurting you because he was a man acknowledged by society, murder will ruin his reputation.

Kuroo didn’t want to leave. Even after leaving the apartment, he hung around the door deciding his next move. There was no noise coming inside and he didn’t have any other choice rather than to back down and leave it. Y/n was right, no matter how violent Toru can be he cannot cross the limits. He valued his reputation. But he didn’t want to see Y/n hurt. He walked out of the apartment building and waited for a while, patting against his pockets to find his cellphone. He should call someone and ask about his next move. He hasn’t been insecure about his decisions before but regarding this sensitive topic, it would be better if he called Akaashi or Sugawara. “Did I left it back there?” He wondered, looking over his shoulder to see the apartment block again. He shook his head running back to the building, half glad about the excuse and the opportunity. Half wondering what her reactions would be. He exited the elevator, thinking of walking to her apartment when the elevator beside him pinged close, giving him only enough time to see the disappearing figure of Y/n behind the two metal doors. Out of sheer surprise, Kuroo froze to the ground. She didn’t see him. An unknown feeling of anxiety filled his stomach as he smashed his fingers on the elevator buttons. He tried the staircase but soon find out it had been close due to construction, he raced his way to the elevators back again as the doors pinged open. He raced inside, wishing she would be okay. Wishing he would be able to save her.

His ride to the rooftop seems to take forever. He paced around waiting until the door opened. He stepped out. The cold night wind welcomed him, brushing away his raven hair out of his face. Kuroo froze: there she was, still alive, standing at the edge. Her head tipped back to stare at the eerily beautiful stars in the night sky. “Y/n?” Kuroo talked.

She turned, surprised. Her eyes filling with thousands of emotions. “Kuroo? What are you doing here?”

“Get down from there. It’s dangerous” Kuroo didn’t answer her question. He didn’t have the time to answer her question. The only thought running inside his mind was: get her out from there!

She turned back to the sky, “This world is a terrifying place, Kuroo. I don’t think I can endure it anymore.” She looked over her shoulder at him, smiling. “You’re a kind person, you know? It’s rare to see people like you. Wish I would’ve-” She stopped, shaking her head. “My life, it doesn’t have to go on anymore.”

“You still have the chance, Y/n. Come down and we’ll sort it out, please.” Kuroo knew his voice was shaking. He was surprised he had the strength to talk at all at the moment.

She suddenly turned and opened her arms, “I wish it was different for me, different for us. You can call me selfish for thinking like this. But” She smiled, and Kuroo’s heart stopped for a moment. It was the same smile. The one that reached to her eyes and wrinkled the edges of her face. The one that lighted up her face like a star. Her smile. The smile that only belonged to her.

(The smile that she gave only to him.)

"I love you"

Kuroo’s heart was racing as she grinned, “Tetsuro, keep that beautiful heart forever. You can make someone’s life better. I know it”

I want to make your life better, he wanted to say but just watched her. His whole body was frozen to the ground as she waved slightly. The hope in her eyes was nowhere to see. Her eyes were empty again. He took a step, ready to take her down from there. Ready to save her life. But, she jumped.

Kuroo would’ve screamed, he would’ve run to the edge of the rooftop to see her. But he just stood there. His arm still hanging midair, trying to reach the girl that was already gone from his life. He fell to his knees, clutching his shirt as he punched the ground repeatedly. The girl he failed to confess. The girl he loved but never was his. Sitting there, he regretted all the words he didn’t say. He should’ve tried harder. Should’ve confessed to her. Should’ve made her life beautiful but he failed.

Then again, no one could blame him. We’re all living lives filled with regret. Just one after another problems crowd inside our minds but, we’re humans. We make mistakes but our pure existence can make someone smile. Make someone happy. We can be the reason that someone’s alive.

Kuroo stood up and collected his courage. Streams of tears flowed down his tears and he didn’t attempt to wipe them away. An ambulance blared breaking the silence of the night. Her words echoed through the air around him. Her last confession. Kuroo finally screamed, letting out the agony and the pain inside his heart as he sobbed openly. Tears streaming without mercy.

It was just three words: I love you. But it can make the deepest mark inside someone’s heart. Either a pleasant beauty or an everlasting regret.

"She has her head in her heart and a broken body Never wrong but she always says sorry Takes the pain, and throws away her pride"

Word Count : 3954

[loving-daisy]

It’s Only Love | George Weasley x Reader

Masterlist 

Words: 4.0k

Warnings: jealousy, angst if you squint, brief mentions of anxiety, small and enclosed spaces, loneliness, idiots in love, and fluff. 

Summary:  George didn’t know why he was feeling that way. Turns out, it’s only love.

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It’s only love and that is all. 

George slumped into his pillow as soon as he entered his dormitory. Feeling all sorts of things that led him into self reflection in attempt to justify his thoughts. A few moments after, Fred came walking in, hand in his pocket, whistling, ecstatic to have another day of successful pranking. 

Turning to see his brother looking so gloomy, the look on his face was changed into concern. “What’s wrong Georgie? Is something bothering you?” Fred asked as he sat on George’s bed, attempting to comfort his twin. 

“Nothing, I’m just tired.” 

“Tired? But you never get tired whenever we manage to have a successful prank. You can’t fool me, mate. Tell me.” Fred pushed. “It’s nothing, I swear.” 

The older twin scoffed, rolling his eyes.  “Yeah, and like I would believe you. I’m your twin brother, George. We go way way back. Starting from when we were just fetuses! Now tell me, mate. What’s wrong? I won’t stop bothering you until you tell me.” 

George finally managed to sit down and face his twin. “I think…” George trailed off, playing with his fingers. “I fancy a girl.” He sighed, his heart heavy as the thoughts of earlier events was kept swamped in his ginger head.  

Fred smirked, a knowing look in his face. “And who might that be, Georgie? Who’s the unlucky girl who caught your attention?” He teased, poking George’s side, another attempt to make him feel better. Somehow, it worked as it brought George to raise an eyebrow towards Fred. 

“Unlucky? Girls around Hogwarts go crazy over me!” George exclaimed. “Reckon, she would be the luckiest girl in the universe if she decides to go to Hogsmeade with me.”

“Mind you, I am more good looking than you.” The older twin stated, obviously not backing down. George looked at him seriously. “Fred” He called. 

The older twin raised his hands, defending himself. “What? I’m just stating a fact.” 

“We’re identical twins, Fred.”

“I knew that…” Fred said. “But you still haven’t answered my question. Who is it?” He asked, even if he already knew who his brother was eyeing. 

It was painfully obvious from the beginning. George was just too painstakingly blind to see it. Everyone basically already knew...well, except for George. And... the girl he fancies. 

“Admit first that I’m the better looking twin.”

“Nope” Fred says, popping the ‘p’. when an idea suddenly popped into his mind. He needs a little more push Fred thought to himself. And so, he stood up, walking towards the door before stating “If you won’t tell me, I’ll just inform Y/N then.” 

Before Fred was able to reach the door, George went running to it, blocking it away from his twin. “DO NOT TELL Y/N PLEASE. I BEG YOU.” Fred gave George a fake surprised look. “But why? She’s our best friend! She’ll know what to -`” 

“Because I can confess my own feelings to the girl I like.” 

Fred gave George a smug look, patting his shoulder. “Good job, mate. Now that wasn’t so hard was it?” George gave him a confused look before finally realizing what Fred has done for him to act that way. “Merlin! I really hate you Fred.” He sighed, defeated. “No, you don’t. I’m your best man! I gotta give it to you though, took you quite a while. Everyone already knew about your undying love for Youngheart except for you, I guess.” He shrugged. “Wait, it's THAT obvious?” The younger twin asked, his eyes going wide. 

“You must be blimey joking, mate. It’s obvious you want to have her all for yourself. I don’t even know why you’re wasting a good amount of time when you could have dated her a long time ago! That woman is crazy mad for you too!” Fred exclaimed. 

The bitter look on George’s face became present once again. “If she’s mad for me, she wouldn’t be giggling earlier with that Hufflepuff.”

Fred was out of words. “...are you perhaps jealous?” He questioned, making George scoff. “No, I’m not.” He denied. 

Fred snorted, patting his twin’s shoulder and deciding to just let it go and not waste more time as he suddenly wanted to see Angelina. “Sure, but if I were you, mate, I would go and make a move as soon as possible if I don’t want that Hufflepuff taking Y/N’s heart. Now, move. I’m gonna go see Angelina.” And with that, George was left alone to reflect on the older Weasley’s words. 

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“Hey, George. What’s up? You didn’t tell me about yours and Fred’s prank earlier. I heard from Fred that Filch had smoke coming out from his ears!” Y/N giggled as she sat beside George in the great hall for supper. 

George gave her a small smile. “Well, it was amazing actually. I was actually looking for you but I couldn’t find you so I decided to just go back to the dormitories.” George clenched his fists as he lied straight in Y/N’s face. He hated lying to you but he had to for him to contain himself. 

Y/N gave him a confused look. “But I saw you though...I know you saw me too. In the hallways, remember? I was sitting with this Hufflepuff boy and-”

“I believe you have confused yourself, love. I was sure I didn’t see you.” George said, trying to avoid how the way your eyes sparkled earlier being with that stupid Hufflepuff when it could have been him. 

An obvious tension flooded the atmosphere, causing both to just stuff their mouths with the feast laid in front of them to avoid further heat. 

“The Weasley Twins have done it again, everybody! Give it up for Fred and George!” Lee announces to the crowd. “Thank you, thank you, I couldn’t have done it without these babies. And of course, there’s Georgie too.” Fred jokingly said, nudging his twin’s arm when he saw how George turned his head from left to right, looking for a certain Gryffindor girl. “Reckon, this was all my idea, Fred. Now if you would excuse me, I have some business to attend to.” With that, George pushed himself through the crowd and walked from hall to hall, trying to find Y/N. 

As George turned into the next hall, he was met with the Golden trio. He smiled. “Hey there Harry, Granger, and of course, Ronnikins. What are you up too?” He said, looking ahead of him as he already saw the familiar red scarf. There was Y/N with her hair down, a book in her lap, and a hand in her mouth, stifling a laugh from something the boy beside her said. George’s eyes went dark. His insides giving him an unfamiliar feeling.

“What’s wrong with you George? Why are you suddenly nervous? Get it together, George. You wouldn’t want to fool yourself in front of the girl you like right? Wait,...the girl I like? Do I like her? I must be crazy. Y/N Youngheart is your best friend George Weasley. But the way her hair falls...her eyes, her laugh...her everything is just perfect. She’s perfect.” He thought to himself, his eyes never leaving the Gryffindor.

“Well, do you have any suggestions Fred?” George was brought back to his senses as Hermione spoke. “Fred? But I’m George.” He shook his head, teasing the wise Gryffindor. “Honestly, Granger, you call yourself a friend when you can’t even tell the two of us apart.” Hermione smirked. “I knew it was you all along, George. You just weren’t listening as you were shooting heart eyes to Y/N at the back.” Ron snickered. 

George gasped. “I was definitely not shooting heart eyes! What are you-” “Yeah, ‘cause he was definitely shooting daggers towards that boy Y/N was with.” Harry stated. At that moment, it was as if a light bulb showed on top of Ron’s head, coming into a realization. “Wait, are you jealous?” Ron asked. The 6th year Gryffindor was taken aback. 

“There’s something wrong with you three if you guys think that way. I think I’m tired. I guess I’m just gonna head back to the common room. See you later!” He dismissed, quickly turning around to head back and have some deep reflection on what he was truly feeling for his best friend. “Tired? But he never gets tired when they pull a successful prank.” The young Weasley confusedly mumbled to his friends, George being able to hear it. 

On his way to the common room, he was able to slowly gather his thoughts. “Yeah George, what is wrong with you?” He questioned before quickly shrugging the thought and coming up with a concrete conclusion “I guess there are just those days where you feel a certain tiredness even if you do things you love the most.” 

He recalled how he and Fred were able to pull off their prank; from doodling in their parchments in between classes, to stealing Snape’s stock to cook up potions, to the implementation, and to the way his heart felt disappointment when he didn’t spot Youngheart in the crowd to celebrate. The look on Y/N’s face with that Hufflepuff suddenly flashed in his train of thought. Her cheeks shade of pink, her eyes shrinking to form a line from the laugh she’s bestowing, and just everything. George would have felt delighted from the sight if it weren’t for the sweet-looking Hufflepuff. “That damn Hufflepuff. It should have been me.” George muttered as he entered his dorm and slumped into his pillow. 

A few minutes after the awkward exchange, the mood became brighter as Fred took his place beside his twin along with the Golden trio plus Ginny sitting across them. Supper was spent with Fred telling them about how Angelina was as red as a tomato when Fred showed a magic trick, obviously smitten for the girl; Harry reading a book with Ginny, Ron stuffing his face as if he hasn’t eaten for days, and Hermione scolding him. If you would observe them, it was obvious that Y/N Youngheart had something bothering her. 

George was quietly eating his food, trying to look interested in Fred’s story, until Y/N nudged him. She motioned for him to lean down and when he did, she whispered. “Do you perhaps wanna hang out later?” Y/N asked, a hopeful look in her eyes. George’s heart started beating fast, nervous, but he was able to give her a small smile. “Anything for you.” 

--------------------

As Y/N entered the girl’s dormitory, she was met by her cat, Cloud. “Took you long enough. I’m hungry!” He whined. 

“Have a little patience would you? You just ate a few hours ago.” She teased as she removed the scarf she was wearing, which was a gift from George. 

“But that was a few hours ago Youngheart.” She raised her eyebrows as she faced her pet. “So we’re going to do a last name basis now huh? Did you forget that you’re also basically a Youngheart?” 

“Of course, I didn’t forget. I just wanted to remind you that YOU are my mom and that you should be feeding me.” Cloud whined further. “Worry about dressing well later for Mr. Weasley, just please feed me.” He added, making Y/N stop in her tracks as confusion invaded her mind. 

“How did you know me and George were going to meet up?” She questioned. “I just do. Now come on, feed me so that you can now finally go to your love.” 

“Sometimes, I want to remove this bracelet. You keep on whining.” Y/N jokingly stated as she picked up cloud’s bowl to prepare his meal. For Y/N’s 12th birthday, her mom gave her a kitty as a gift, in which she named him Cloud because he was really fluffy. Cloud liked to meow a lot, but with no skills of cat communication, Y/N never really understood the reason for his noises. That’s why she decided to make a bracelet that would let her understand what Cloud was trying to say. 

“Has he confessed yet?” Cloud asked. “Confessed? Why would he confess? I think you should be asking ME if I have already confessed.” Y/N suggested, giving her cat a raised eyebrow. “He obviously likes you back.” Replied Cloud nonchalantly. 

Youngheart finally laid down the metal bowl that holds her cat’s dinner before sitting on her bed. “And how would you know that? You don’t even leave this room.” She nagged, getting nothing but noises coming from the cat’s bowl due to its bell hitting the metal. A few more seconds passed before Cloud looked up to her and said “Are you sure?” 

Youngheart gasped. “Don’t tell me you have been sneaking out.” 

“Then, I won’t tell you.” 

“Cloud!!!” She squeaked. “Why didn’t you tell me?” Disbelief all over her face.

“Because you’re overprotective! You act as if I can’t take care of myself.”

“Well, you seem to look that way! Look at you! Always hungry and whining. What would you do without me?” 

“What would I do without you? Not whine of course! I only whine in front of you because I love you.” 

-------------------- 

A blanket was laid inside the astronomy tower. There they were, Y/N Youngheart and George Weasley, having a midnight picnic as if they didn’t just have supper at the Great hall 2 hours ago. 

“Y/N.” George called, making Y/N look to her side in order to face the ginger. “Yes?” 

“You know we’re in our sixth years now but you never really told me what you want to do in the future. I already told you about me and Fred’s plan of starting a joke shop, but what about you? You’ve given me and Fred a lot of support for our future and I wanted to do the same for you. You are our best friend after all.” He explained, his voice soft and warm, like a sweater you wear during the cold holidays. 

Youngheart was taken aback by the sudden topic. “I….don’t really know, George.” She began. “All I know is that I really love potions. I like mixing potions. It’s just...it's amazing isn’t it? How a group of ingredients mixed together to form a mixture that could do something different. But I really want to make a potion that could heal people. Should I be a healer instead? But I don’t really want to deal with people. They give me anxiety!” 

As if the ginger’s eyes held the entire universe, it sparkled. “Potions, eh? How ‘bout you join me and Fred’s joke shop? You can be the mastermind of our potions! How ‘bout something that makes your teeth fall off? Or something that can turn your hair red!” He suggested. 

Youngheart giggled, causing the ginger’s heart to beat like crazy. Serotonin spreading throughout his body. “Why would you need a potion that turns your hair into red? Your hair is already red!” 

“I’ll use it for you so you can become a Weasley.” He joked, earning a full blown laugh from the girl. “There are other ways I can become a Weasley that doesn’t necessarily need me drinking a potion to turn my hair red. I can go just marry Bill or Charlie and I’ll immediately become a Weasley!” 

“Bill or Charlie?” He queried, the familiar feeling he felt earlier splashing through his stomach making it ache like it was acid. Youngheart raised her brows, feigning an innocent expression. “What? What’s wrong with them? They’re your older brothers, afterall. Not like I would marry Percy….or Fred...or You….or Ron! I’m just basing it from my ranking of my favorite Weasley.”

“Am I not your favorite Weasley?!” George asked, pushing the green monster away from his facial expression and feigning a hurt one instead. The look on Youngheart remained innocent. “No?” She answered.  

“Honestly, woman-” 

“Ginny is my favorite. If I could marry her, I would. But she’s too smitten with Harry. And she’s like a sister to me. That would be weird.” she blurted before sitting up and grabbing a chocolate chip cookie that she and George stole from the kitchens. 

Right, a sibling. If Y/N sees Ginny as her sister, she might see me and Fred the same? Nice try, George. I guess you’ll have to spend the rest of your life being in love with your best friend who only sees you as a brother. The ginger thought to himself before mirroring the actions of the girl he fancied. 

--------------------

George once again, slumped into his pillow rather loudly, a thump on his wooden bed, accidentally waking his snoring twin. “Hey mate, quiet down will you? Some want their beauty sleep and that someone is me.” Fred nagged.

“Fred, what do I do?” The younger twin asked, his voice filled with worry causing the older twin to pull down his blanket and eyeing his twin with squinted eyes. “What do you mean?” 

“She only sees me as a brother, mate. An older brother! And she said she wanted to marry Bill or Charlie...I better keep them away from her.”

“She said that?” Fred asked in disbelief. 

“Well…” George began. “She mentioned how her favorite Weasley is Ginny and that she would marry her if she could. It's just that she sees her like a sister. Which means, she probably sees me like a brother too...right?” 

Seriousness enveloped Fred’s sleepy face, blinking at his twin for a few times before exclaiming “Merlin! I won’t deal with this right now. You’re giving me a headache George. You need to go to sleep.” 

“Let’s talk about this tomorrow yeah?” He added, earning a soft “Yeah...” from George.

--------------------

“Hello? Earth to George?” George quickly snapped out of his trance as Y/N pinched his right cheek in hopes to regain George’s attention to her. “What was that?” George asked, shaking his head. 

“I said, do you want to meet in the astronomy tower later? We could pass by the kitchens and steal milk and cookies! We could-” George cut her off. 

“I’m sorry, love. But I’m kind of tired. Maybe some other time?” Y/N frowned, her eyebrows meeting and her lively energy dying down. “O-okay. Good night, George.” She said, standing up from the couch she and George had been sitting on in the Gryffindor common room, walking away. 

George was left alone in silence in front of the fireplace, his heart feeling empty and his head full of thought until his twin popped out of nowhere, smacking the back of his head with a book. “Ow! What was that for, mate?” George sputtered, rubbing his head to relieve the pain. 

“You are impossible, mate. Why are you pushing her away? She clearly wants to spend some time with you!” Fred exclaimed. 

“Why would she spend time with me when she could have just asked that Hufflepuff boy? He obviously- Oi! Stop it, will you?” Fred once again, smacked the back of his twin’s head. “If she wanted to spend time with that boy, then she could have asked, you’re right. But Merlin! She asked you, mate!” 

George scoffed. “But why?” He questioned, earning a groaning Fred. “Because she fancies you, mate! Are you blind?” 

The older twin was about to lose his mind. His brother was impossible! It was obvious how Y/N fancied him and how he fancied her too! 

“If she fancies me, she wouldn’t have proposed the thought of marrying Bill or Charlie to become a Weasley! She only sees me as a brother, mate. You and me both.” 

Fred sighed. “You know what, I’m not dealing with you anymore. You’re really something else. But piece of advice, if you don’t want that Hufflepuff boy winning Y/N’s heart, you have to do something about it.” 

--------------------

For the next few weeks, the younger Weasley twin managed to avoid Y/N, who was confused, blue, and angry at the same time. She didn’t know why the tall ginger would go the other way whenever they would cross paths in the halls of the wizarding school. She was clueless on why she never sits beside or across from George anymore. She was clueless on how whenever she would ask him to have their usual midnight escapade to the astronomy tower, he would decline, telling her that he was tired or that he had an essay to do. The Weasley twins never do their homework. Not ever. 

On her way to divination class, a force from a grip on her wrist led her to the nearest broom closet, bodies pressed together as they both forced themselves to fit in the small space. Looking up at her kidnapper, she saw a familiar ginger. However, it was not the ginger that she was yearning for.

She feigned a sigh. “Look, Fred. You’re probably here to confess your undying love for me but I fancy somebody else. I’m so sorry. We can still stay as friends though, we can pretend that nothing ever happened.” 

Fred cackled, earning a smile from the girl. “You do know how to make things less awkward, Youngheart. Maybe you should join me and George’s pranking streak? We could use that wit of yours into good use.” 

Y/N frowned at the mention of the twin’s name, her eyes glossy with tears threatening to spill, earning a hug from the taller lad. “Aww, there, there, Youngheart. Everything’s gonna be okay.” Fred comforted, patting the back of her head as he wrapped his arms around her small shoulders and cuddled her like a newborn baby. The girl couldn’t help but show her vulnerability to the ginger. He was her best friend after all. 

“What did I do, Fred? Did I do something wrong that could have upset him? Did I say something?” She couldn’t help but question. “I don’t know what to do.”

Before Fred could open his mouth to curse his twin and call him a dimwit, the subject man unbolted the small space, his face full of rage as its color became alike with his hair. “How could you, Fred?! How could you?!” He bellowed, causing the pair to pull away from each other and face him with wide eyes. 

“George…” The girl stammered. 

“How can you take Y/N from me when you know how much I fancied her?!” The younger twin growled. 

“What?” 

“It’s true! I fancy you, Youngheart. I really do! And it’s driving me mad because every time I see you with somebody else, a monster invades my whole being! And it’s not just the monster, it's the green monster!” George began. “At first I was clueless on why I was feeling that way but then I realized that it’s only love, Youngheart. So screw that. I don’t just fancy you. I love you!” He revealed, suddenly gaining the Gryffindor bravery and courage as a result of being too infuriated when he caught his twin and the girl he loved being too close in the small room.

“I love you, Y/N Youngheart. With all my mind, with my body, and with all my soul.” He added, finally processing the look of bewilderment in his best friend’s face. “I know we’re just best friends, Youngheart, and that you only see me like a brother but what I feel for you is in no way or form like that way. I-” 

George’s small speech was interrupted as Youngheart pushed herself into him, tiptoeing as her hands made their way on the sides of his face, holding him, as their lips pin together in a deep passionate kiss. “I love you, too.” 

George Weasley and Y/N Youngheart were crazy mad for each other. It took them a while to finally admit it to themselves but everything eventually fell into its place. What they have? It’s only love. 

--------------------

Author’s note: Merry Christmas! <3 Just a little TMI, my “Cry For Me” series that involves a George x Reader type story was supposed to come out this 25th. Unfortunately, I had to postpone it for inevitable circumstances. To make up for it, here’s a short work made by yours truly. Enjoy the holidays! x Daisy 

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It’s Only Love 

[scorsoneamelia]

colors

here’s an amelink au!! i am super excited for this one and it may be confusing i’m so sorry if it is!!! i’m planning on making this a multi-fic so that’s why it’s so short cause this is just basically the first but BUT i WILL be continuing this one! hope it’s good and isn’t too confusing

tw: mentions of death

              Colors didn’t exist; maybe they existed but nobody could see them. Everyone and everything was in black and white, skin color didn’t exist, nobody could tell when someone’s cheeks flushed red from embarrassment, the sky was always dark, cars were all the same color; the world was dull. It was either black, white or grey, some shades were darker and some were lighter. There was no such things as blues, purples, reds; nobody even knew what those were. Everyone saw in black and white unless they’re dying.

               They didn’t know why, they didn’t know how but according to anyone who was dying they saw the world differently, more brighter, more full; more full of life and some would laugh at the irony considering the moment they’re dying the world goes from dull to light. It’s been researched about, it’s been talked about and some people think it’s a myth; seeing something completely different from others just because you’re dying. It can’t be true.

              Some doctors believed it while some didn’t, people who weren’t dying thought they were crazy and some believed they actually were. (mind you, having people tell you you’re crazy, starts to sound believable.)

              Maybe that’s why Amelia believed just that; believed that she was crazy. Because enough people told her that and even when she would look out the window the trees were not the same dull and bland color they normally were, and the sky was brighter and the clouds seemed more white. The theory of her being crazy became more true because even though the sky and the trees were different, the rest of the world wasn’t.

              She was okay with being crazy; it made the world less dark and if it meant she got to look at the world this way until she dies, she’ll be okay with it. At least this way the sky didn’t match the darkness she had inside her.

               The grocery store was different, while most things were the same bland and gloomy shades, some things were lit up; bright and beautiful. The lettuce was the same colour as the trees, where as the strawberries and bananas were normal; what she was used to. The blueberries were the same as the sky, only a much darker shade. It was weird, and she had a confused look on her face the entire time while everyone else didn’t. She wonders if anyone else, anyone at all can see the fruits the same way she did. (maybe they were crazy too.)

                She was short, she’d admit that, especially when she was reaching for an item on a top shelf, her arm and fingers spread as far as they could, standing on the tip of her toes. A huff of frustration left her throat and she placed her feet flat onto the ground before she tried again, jumping slightly to try and reach the object.

                “Need any help?” There was a voice beside her, a male who was much taller than her was reaching for the object, and it was easier for him.

                 He handed her the box, and she noticed his eyes resembled the sky, it made her breath get caught in her throat. She’s never seen someone look like that; that beautiful. His jawline was sharp and his eyes were a color that she has never seen until today and she couldn’t stop staring. He towered over her, his body shape was lean and he was fit, and super attractive. There was an awkward silence, neither of them breaking contact and his eyebrow was raised.

               “This is usually the part where you say thank you,” his reply wasn’t hostile or rude, but he was smiling and there was a sparkle in his eyes that made him look even more beautiful. (if that was possible)

                “Uh, ya,” she was stumbling over her words, her cheeks getting warm and she had to force herself to look away, to look anywhere but into his eyes. “Thanks.”

                 Her hair was short, shoulder length and it was a dark brown with a hint of blonde at the ends, mind you, brown hair or blonde hair wasn’t a thing, you either had dark hair or light hair. Her eyes matched his although hers were a darker blue, something she never noticed until today. Usually her eyes were heavy, dark and there wasn’t any hint of life in them. The male looking at her thought she was beautiful though.

                “Atticus,” he was giving her his hand. “Lincoln.”

                “Atticus? As in-“

                “From To Kill a Mockingbird, yes, my parents are huge fans.” He interrupted her and she hadn’t grabbed his hand yet, although he still had it hovering in between them.

                “Amelia,” she finally answered, their hands connecting to shake each other’s hand; a casual greeting. “Shepherd.”

                 The rest of the world was frozen and it was just the two of them, they both must have been lost in each others eyes because neither of them would stop staring. If it were up to her, she’d stand here everyday until her life came to an end because this was better than the alternative.

                 She was dying. Two years ago, as a doctor; a surgeon, she had the unfortunate luck of getting diagnosed with Pancreatic cancer. This form of cancer is very aggressive and the survival rate is less than 50%. They found hers late because she never showed any symptoms until it was too late.

                 She tried radiation treatment in attempt to shrink the tumour, making it easier for the surgeons to remove it but after nine months of her feeling weak and losing her hair, she ended it. It wasn’t working, the cancer wasn’t shrinking, it was just staying the same.

                 She remembers sitting on the bathroom floor, head over the toilet and she was emptying out her stomach. Her hands were gripped so hard onto the toilet bowl it was like she was holding on for life. There was a pounding in her temples, and it was worse when her eyes were open. She never felt good, always feeling like she literally was hit by a bus, but that’s what radiation and cancer did to you, so there was nothing she could do but sit with her head in the bowl, slow breaths in through her mouth and tears would spill out of her eyes. 

                  Before the diagnosis, her hair was long, reaching to the middle of her back and it was thick. Most would argue that her hair was her best quality (until it wasn’t.) The radiation thinned out her hair, and she remembers all the nights she stood in front of her mirror and would watch her hands fill up with balls of her own hair. Her skin was more pale and she was losing weight. She wasn’t sure if the weight loss was from the radiation, the cancer or just because she had no motivation to eat. Her body was always weak and she was always so tired, she found herself always sleeping in later than usual and having naps constantly throughout the day. Even when she was awake, she wanted to stay in bed all day because, what was the point?

                 She made a promise to herself two years ago, a promise to not let anyone get too close. No friends, no boyfriends; nobody. Death comes with pain, and at this point it was all inevitable. How selfish would it be for her to make friends with someone and die none months later? If anyone got too close to her, she’d be leaving, she’d be leaving too too soon for anyone to be able to accept so being alone was her decision. Of course, she still had people in her life pre-cancer but those people were also loyal and too nice to listen to Amelia push them out of her life. 

                 So maybe that’s the reason why she turned away from Atticus, her hands gripping onto the shopping kart and her knuckles were white. Don’t make friends with this guy.

                “Are you from here?” He spoke again and his voice was like music to her ears. 

                “No,” she replied. “I moved here years ago.” She wasn’t going to give this guy much information because they were not going to get to know each other, she refuses it. 

                “Maybe I’ll see you around?” His voice was hopeful, and she could see the hope in his eyes, too.

                “Listen,-” she was going to be honest, tell him that she isn’t worth his time, that she wasn’t interested but instead she found herself lying. “I’m moving out of Seattle soon, maybe we’ll run into each other again and maybe... we won’t.”

                “I’m hoping for the first option.” So was she, but she promised herself and she doesn’t want to let herself break that promise because the more people she knows, the more people she hurts and it’ll make dying more difficult for her.

                “I will...” she trailed off, eyes meeting each others again and it took her breath away again. “see you around.” 

               “I’m looking forward to it.” She thinks his smile is as pretty as his eyes; maybe even prettier. He thinks she’s the most beautiful. 

               They were both flustered and it was obvious, but both of them tried to casually play it off before he disappeared around a corner, leaving her alone in the grocery store aisle. Perfect. Alone; just the way she wanted it to be. 

               Her doctor said that she had between nine and 12 months to live, the surgery wouldn’t be successful because her tumour was considered inoperable and too aggressive. Surgery would have been done if the radiation treatment would have worked by shrinking her tumour significantly, but unfortunately she was unlucky and didn’t get that option. It took a long time for her to process, there’s still a part of her that hasn’t completely processed the fact that she is, infact, dying. Soon her life will be over, she’ll never see anybody ever again, never be a doctor again and she’s come to terms with it (kind of), but some part of her is always wishing for a miracle. 

             She hasn’t kept in touch with her family, but it’s not like they’ve been begging for her attention or even putting in an ounce of effort. Amelia has lost people before, her family has lost people before and if not speaking to her family will make the pain they may or may not experience any less, then maybe that means cutting off everybody she once cared about. 

              Most people who have less than a year to live would create a bucketlist, sleep with however many people they want, do whatever they want until they take their last breath. Not Amelia though, instead she chose to push everyone away and spend her last few months doing what she loves; operating. But since she could literally die at any minute, she had to quit her job at the hospital. So, since she couldn’t do what she wanted to do she decided to be alone and as tragic as it sounds, Amelia finds comfort in it.

             So no, she doesn’t hope she runs into the boy again mostly because she knows herself and she doesn’t trust it. She doesn’t trust the way his eyes make her feel, or the way his voice sounds or how his smile makes her hands tremble and her knees weak. No friends, no attachment. No boyfriends, no pain. 

[pur-pled-aw-thor]

Same House, Different Sides

Draco Malfoy x Slytherin!Reader(F)

Summary: Being friends with the Golden Trio has its perks and of course cons. Plus being in Slytherin means someone is against you or not.

W.C: 3.7k

Warning/s: bullying, mentions of blood, mentions of self-harm, a loved one passing away..(if I miss any or got something wrong correct me, I'm willing to learn.)

A/n: this story mentions self-harm and please, if you are thinking about it, don't. Your skin is beautiful, so beautiful that it doesn't need any scars. If you need to vent out my inbox is open, have a wonderful weekend! <3

Y/n’s POV

“Oi Y/l/n! I see you’re with Weaslebee, Mudblood, and Potter again!” I heard someone yelling behind us and I walked faster. The three caught up with my speed but he was faster. He went beside me, almost in front of me, and grabbed my arm.

“I’m talking to you, traitor!” He said and I shoved him off, “Stop it Malfoy! Can you just shut up for a day?! That would be helpful!” I shouted at him and continued to walk away, I didn’t look back or waited for the trio or an answer from Malfoy, I just wanted to go to our last class.

Defense Against the Dark Arts

I entered the room and sat in front. I aggressively took out my book and turned to the lesson we have today. The trio entered the room and sat beside me, while Malfoy and his posse sat behind us. I was about to move tables but Hermione held my arm and looked past me nodding. I looked beside me and the boys smiled.

“What is it you three?” I asked, “If anything more happens, we’ll beat him to a pulp.” Hermione whispered and I giggled. I tried to look behind us without suspicions and saw Malfoy and his goons talking too.

The pink frog lady came in and the room became quiet. Hermione and I exchanged looks and exhaled. She started talking more and more about basic spells and I started to doze off. Hermione nudged me and I came back to Earth.

“I hate this class, ever since she taught it.” I whispered and Hermione just shrugged her shoulders saying she’s also tired with the same spells being taught to us, “At least we get to do other spells after.” She said a hint of mischief in her tone. I smirked and made that into my inspiration.

We know something others don’t.

“Come on, Y/n! Hurry up!” I heard Ginny at the end of the hall and I started running. But before I reached the end, a person came out of nowhere and I groaned knowing who it is.

“Where are you going, traitor?” “None of your business, Malfoy,” I said passing by him, pushing him. “It’s my business you know!” He yelled and I stopped in my tracks. I let out a laugh and slowly turned towards him.

“How dare you say that. Who are you to ask my business?” He took steps so he was behind me to block my way, “I’m a member of the Inquisitorial Squad, and I’m here to make sure you won’t lose us house points. You’re not even helping make more house points if I might add.” He said crossing his arms, I rolled my eyes and walked past him. He grabbed me by my arm and I shoved him, harder than earlier.

“Can you just, go away and leave me alone!” I yelled and he was taken back, “Please.” I added this is the first time I shouted at someone that shocked the person. Everyone is used to my caring and loveable nature. They’re used to my bravery at standing up to Malfoy but no one ever knew I can yell at him.

Especially if it is because of anger.

“Y-y/n, I’m so-“ “What?! You’re sorry now?! Sorry, can’t fix 5 years of your bullying! Sorry, can’t fix your attitude! Sorry. Can’t. Fix. Anything!” I exclaimed, stepping towards him at every word but he backs away. When I made sure his back is against the wall, I started walking- no- running away. Tears brimming, breath shallowing, and mind fuzzing. Every step of the run made it seem it was my last.

I reached the room and noticed the others are lined up, Hermione and Ron in the middle, “Come on, Y/n! They’re about to duel!” I heard Ginny say and I dropped my bag, got my wand, and wiped away a tear.

The whole room was silent but it was dismissed by Hermione’s cast, “Stupefy!” I cheered and went to Hermione. Ron stood up and went to the twins, they’re looking at him not believing what he said.

We continued training and It got my mind to forget whatever happened before I got here, I stood aside and rest for a while. Looking around, seeing other students from different houses gather up to learn how to fight, made me realize we’re all fighting for the same reason. I smiled at them and went to Hermione, “’Mione, I think I need to rest for today. Tell Harry I’ll make sure I know the other spells next meeting.” I said and she looked at me like she knows something’s up but just nodded.

I got my bag and carefully opened the door, looking side to side to see if anyone was around. When the coast was clear I walked out and went to the library. ‘I know Malfoy won’t disturb me there.’ I thought and I turned a corner and entered the library. Madame Pince smiled at me and I went to my spot. Took out my essay and started it.

I got to the part where I can’t add more to it so I stood up and went to get more books for references. I got to the last shelves and saw the book but I heard someone talking, I know eavesdropping is bad but they’re talking about Harry so I can’t help it.

“I know Potter is hiding something and one of our own is joining him. I need to know.” “You want to know because she’s always with him or just to spite him?” I lost my focus to go back to my essay and leaned back on the shelves.

“I’m guessing you’re jealous.” One of them said and the first voice started babbling. “W-what n-no, why would I be jealous of Potter?” He said trying to fix his statement but failed. “Come on, don’t tell me you’re denying it.” The second voice said and the first one got irritated. “We saw you staring at the back of her head every time we sit behind them.” “That’s because her big head is blocking the way!” “Shhh!” we heard Madame Pince from the other side of the library and they hushed down.

“Here’s another one, you keep on teasing her and grabbing her if she’s ignoring you.” “Indicating you want her attention.” “And if you keep on denying, it will just go on forever, making you miserable for not saying a word.” The two exchanged lines and I realized something one of them said.

“If you both are saying I like traitor, keep wishing.” I turned around fast enough to push a few books off the shelves and dropping at the other side. I dropped the book and ran outside the library and towards the common room. I entered the room I share with the others and noticed they aren’t there. I sat down behind the door and locked it.

“I shouldn’t have eavesdropped,” I said and I hugged my knees trying to comfort myself.

“You shouldn’t be eavesdropping, Y/n!” “Calm down, Arteus.” “No, Mom! She’s been eavesdropping and you’re protecting her?” “She’s just a kid, Arteus.” “That’s what you always said to me, Father! But you still disciplined me! And why can’t I discipline her?” “That’s it! Arteus Y/l/n, you get out of this house and stay with your Aunt!” “No! I’m the heir!” the mood in the room is turning gloomy that smiling would be deemed inappropriate.

“You are just adopted! Your Last name is Lynn, your father was a mudbood and we just got you for the sake of our name! Now, I regret that decision. You are not allowed to use Y/l/n anymore!” the silence was deadly. Arteus stood up and walked away.

“Arteus, I’m so-“ “Sorry? Y/n, sorry can’t fix anything! Sorry, can’t clean up this mess. Because of you, this family is ruined!” “Get out Arteus!” Father is pointing his wand towards Arteus and he just laughed. “Sorry and lies? This family is nuts.” “Avada Kedavra!” “No! Arteus!” I ran towards his lifeless body and father walked away. Mother made me stand up and hugged me.

I heard someone knock on the door and I unlocked it letting one of my roommates in. I wiped the tear that was rolling down my cheek and sat down on my bed, “Have you finished the essay, Y/n?” she asked and I forgot my satchel and essay back at the library. “Oh, Merlin.” “What, what is it?” “I forgot my stuff back at the library,” I said and she’s confused.

“I was in a hurry,” I said scratching the back of my head. She looked at me and she knows something’s up. “I’ll just, get it. Wait for me?” “Yeah, sure hurry up, Y/n!” I heard her yell after me and I was already exiting the common room.

I ran towards the library but carefully went inside. I went to the table but it was gone. I asked Madame Pince and she said she never saw my stuff, I nodded and walked back towards the common rooms but I bumped into my roommate and she has my essay.

“There you are, somebody brought your stuff and I got your essay! This girl keeps on running off away from me.” I ran up the stairs and saw my satchel at the foot of my bed. ‘Guess she placed it inside.’ I looked inside if anything was missing but its complete. I placed it on my chair and sighed.

-

“Just think of a happy memory, any happy memory,” I said to myself and saw the other’s patronuses frolicking around. “What’s troubling you, Y/n?” I heard Luna’s voice and I smiled at her. “It’s hard for me to think of a happy memory, ‘cause you know,” I said pointing at my sweater and she tilted her head in confusion.

“You are still capable of having a happy memory, you just need to focus on the memory, not your house.” She said and I nodded. I closed my eyes and remembered every memory I have, with the trio, Ginny, the Twins… Arteus. I opened my eyes and cast my Patronus. It frolicked around with the others, I smiled and I felt a tear slide down. I immediately wiped it away and smiled harder.

‘I miss you Arteus.’ I lowered my wand and I felt a quake. I thought it was just me but everyone stopped what they were doing. We felt it again but this time the chandeliers are shaking. I went up front and it quaked again, stronger. Stronger that the glass shattered and the Twins raised their wand and I did too. Harry went closer and closer until there was a hole on the wall. I came closer to the hole and I heard her voice.

“I’ll make short work of this.” She raised her wand again, I pulled Harry and he pulled Creevey away from the hole, “Bombarda Maxima.” A huge explosion happened and it was a good thing we got out of the way. An enormous hole took over and we saw Umbridge, Filch, the Inquisitorial Squad, and Malfoy dragging Cho.

The others stared at Umbridge and Cho, while Malfoy and I stared at each other. He was shocked that I’m a part of this but my stare at him is anger, pure anger. I clenched my hands into fists that I forgot I’m still holding my wand, Luna noticed this and she tried to open my hands and she succeeded in opening the one with my wand, she took it and looked at it.

“Y/n, your hand is bleeding.” She whispered and I looked at the wand and down my hands. I hid it away but by the time I looked up, Percy is holding Harry and Cho while we are separated.

-

“Because of Cho, we’re in big trouble.” “She was under the influence of Veritaserum, Ronald.” Hermione and Ron looked at me confused and I just sighed. “Y/n do you know your hands are bleeding?” Ron pointed out and I looked at it, “We should bring you to the Infirmary. You might get an infection.” “It’s fine, I’ll go by myself, you guys wait for Harry to come back,” I said picking up my satchel and went to the direction of the Infirmary, but when I knew I was out of sight, I took a turn and went straight down the common room.

Most of the Slytherins are out, either celebrating the downfall of Harry, going around with Umbridge like lost puppies, or just studying. I stayed here and let my hands bleed. I looked at it and sighed.

“You really should be in the Infirmary you know. You might bleed to death.” I looked up and saw Malfoy, I rolled my eyes and just stared at the fireplace. “Me bleeding to death is marvelous, I want to be free from this hell hole,” I said and he sighed. He took off to his room and I heard him close the door.

When I thought that was the end of our discussion, I heard his door open again and closing, his footsteps, and him sitting beside me. “You are turning pale, Y/n.” He said and I felt his hand holding my wrist to raise my hand and carefully tended the wound.

He started to raise my sleeve but I retracted my arm away from him. “I just need to roll your sleeves up so it won’t get wet.” “I don’t wanna,” I said plainly and he placed the rag down and adjusted himself so I’m looking at him. “Is it me? Am I the cause?” he asked and I didn’t answer.

“Y-y/n, If I’m the cause te-“ “My brother, well, family. My family is the cause.” I can’t believe I’m telling him this. I gave him my hand again to finish with the wound, he carefully rolled the sleeves up and I heard a gasp from him.

“I was around 10 that time and my brother was just a graduate here at Hogwarts. He was special, he’s in Slytherin and no one suspected a thing that he was a muggle born. Well, a perk of being a Y/l/n, I guess. He was adopted by my parents because they couldn’t wait any longer for me to be born. They only adopted a muggle born because who would abandon a pure or half-blood right?” I said trying to remember their explanations. Malfoy moved to the other side and tended the other wound.

“Anyways, he was having a meeting with the others and I was accidentally by the door. Trying to wait for him to finish. But he thought I was eavesdropping. He yelled at me that my parents went to us and they both protected me. In the heat of the fight, my father admitted he was just adopted and that he shouldn’t be talking to me like that. Father told him to go live with his biological aunt but before he could even leave the house, he-“ I felt a tear sliding down my cheek and Malfoy wiped it away. “It’s okay if you won’t tell.” I shook my head and took a deep breath.

“He died, father used the unforgivable curse on him and I was beside him when he was targeted. I went to his lifeless body but mother made me stand up and hugged me. She made me walk away and every time I remembered that scene, me walking away, crying, mind fuzzy, I feel like it was my last step. That if I look behind, I’ll faint. I started cutting myself this year. It is his 5th death anniversary. And I added more than I can handle every day because he promised me something.” I felt Draco rolling up the other sleeves and a few of them are still new.

“He promised me that he’ll be the one to help me study for my exams. That he’ll train with me before the quidditch matches. That he’ll be the one going to my graduation. But because of his passing, before I came to Hogwarts, I tried my hardest studying for exams like I have him beside me, I train twice as hard just like he wants me to, and I’ll graduate giving him all of the credit.” I felt Malfoy finishing up with the bandages and he hid the supplies away.

“Thank you, Malfoy. But you should’ve just let me be.” “I couldn’t let you bleed to death, Y/l/n.” He said and I cracked a small smile. He smiled back but we’re interrupted by the wave of Slytherins coming in. “See you, Y/l/n?” He stood up and waved. “Yeah, see you, Malfoy.”

-

“Hey, Y/l/n, Professor Umbridge is calling for you.” My roommate said and I stood up from the chair. I gathered up my stuff and she walked with me. I took a deep breath and opened the door, she stayed outside and I closed the door.

“Sit down dear.” “Professor if this is about being in the D.A, I can accept any punishment. I- I can join the others with their punishments or-“ “No dear,  the only punishment that you have is the deduction of house points, that’s all.” She said and she placed her quill down.

“I called you here because of the essay you made, it's marvelous. Because of the essay, I couldn’t make myself think of any punishments but to deduct house points but this also made your house gain points.” She said and I thought back to what happened when I left that. ‘It was incomplete and it was only 2 pages.’

She handed me a 4-page essay and I saw that it was complete, I read the other pages but it looked like it was my writing. I handed her back the papers and she smiled at me. “I hope I can see more essays like this in the future. Thank you, Ms.Y/l/n, You may go now.” I stood up and exited the room.

“Hey, how’d it went?” “She’s only deducting house points instead of punishing me.” I said and her eyes widened, “But I gained a lot of house points because of the essay.” “Oh yeah, I read your essay on the way before passing it. It’s really good, where did you get those references?” We passed by the library and we parted ways.

I went back to my spot and finished the other assignments. When I was just reading a book, I heard someone sit in front of me and I thought it’s just Hermione until I heard his voice.

“Now turn around, love.” I blushed at the name but mostly because he is wearing my hair tie on his wrist. “Chin up, Y/n.” he held my chin and he continued fixing my hair, when he’s finished, he’s the first one to smile and the first to speak up.

“So, what did she think about the essay?” I lowered my book and stared at him, “Are you gonna answer or should I wait?” “You? Did you finish my essay? Why?” “Well, I know you weren’t coming back after what happened so I finished the essay for you and returned it to your dorm.”

Then I realized it, he knew I was eavesdropping. “You knew I was-“ “Yeah, your signature hairstyle gave it away. There was a gap between a few books and I saw your ponytail.” He said and I played with the end of my ponytail. “You know you can put your hair down right? Like this.”

He sat next to me and made me turn around. He removed my hair tie but I caught my hair before it fell. He held my hand and I gently let my hair down and he fixed the back.

“And because I know this is your favourite spot to study, where you can see the whomping willow out the window and when you look inside, the never-ending shelves of books that give you comfort.” He said like I said it to him before. We continued looking at each other’s eyes and he brushed off one of the hair strands that fell. “Don’t let the strands hide your face, love.” He said and I nodded, he slowly moved his fingers away from the back of my ear and towards the underneath of my chin.

He leaned in and I did too, he gently held my face with both of his hands. It’s a passionate kiss and when we pulled apart, he has this big goofy smile. I tried to hold back my giggles but he started giggling too.

“Why are we giggling, Draco?” “Because I feel giddy inside that I kissed the girl I’ve been crushing on since 2nd year.” He said and I stared at him, “Well I’m giggling because I realized the whole time I’ve been with the trio, was only because it was the only way I can get your attention but you’re here crushing on me since 2nd year?” he nodded and he kissed me again, this time I felt safe holding his hands. We pulled apart again and he smiled at me, genuinely.

“I didn’t want to miss a chance to admit that I like you, Y/n.” “And I didn’t want to miss a chance to say, I like you too, Draco,” I said and he held my hands near to his lips and give them a peck. He held my wrists and gently rolled up the sleeves, “I will help you heal, not just physically, but emotionally and mentally, love. I don’t want to see another tear leave your beautiful eyes love.” He said and I felt a tear roll down.

“I just said my part love and you’re crying?” “No, it’s because I’m glad you’re staying even though you saw and heard the worst of me. You saw me supporting a different side of the problem but you’re here. Why Draco? Why would you do this?”

“Love, we’re at the same house but we have a different side we go with. But our love for each other is the same, and that’s important more than anything. That we love each other no matter what.” He said and I hugged him, he hugged me back and continued with comforting me. We stayed there loving each minute that passed by.

No matter which side you’re on, love will always win.

--

[dakotafoster]

ᴅʀᴜɴᴋ ɪɴ ʟᴏᴠᴇ

ραιяιиg : katsuki bakugou x g/n reader

ɢɛռʀɛ: fluff ♡ crack humor

աօʀɖ ƈօʊռȶ : 2.1k

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢs: a bit steamy

𝕤𝕦𝕞𝕞𝕒𝕣𝕪 : When your boyfriend comes home intoxicated, he shows you a side of him that is reserved for only you. ✰

This will be my first one-shot on this blog, so please any constructive criticism will be really helpful! Hope you all enjoy. ッ

╔═══*.·:·.☽✧ ✦ ✧☾.·:·.*═══╗

It was a chilly starry night. Japan from the balcony window had never looked so serene until now. The bright stars that dotted the dark velvet sky, giving the gloomy canvas a little bit of life--of light. It was somber yet luminous, they drew the lights of heaven and gave the citizens of below a meager taste of something so divine and sublime, a measly fragment of the beauty we long to see in ourselves and the world around it. It was magnificent.

A heavy knock interrupted your attention on the black before you, muffled whispers and giggles could be heard from the opposite side of the chestnut door. As you lifted yourself from the glass railing you took a brief gander at the clock sitting on the desk beside your TV. It read 2:43 a.m.

Wrapping a small nearby cardigan around your frame and rubbed your eyes of sleep before making a beeline toward the door, the muffled voices becoming clearer as your got closer.

“Dammit Bakugou, quit messing around and give me your keys!”

“Gotta find it in my ass first shitty hair!”

Swinging the door open your (e/c) optics landed upon a frustrated Kirishima who was wrestling a very drunk Bakugou for a silvery white ring of keys right outside your flat doorstep. Bakugou seemed to be having an absolute blast, giggling like a little school girl as he evaded Kirishima’s attempts to swipe the item from his grip, and Kiri was having none of it. They both seemed rather oblivious to your presence and persisted to look like complete idiots in the halls of the complex.

“Both of you stop it before you wake up the neighbors!”

Your harsh tone is what finally received their attention, gazing timidly at you with wide eyes frozen. In one last attempt to get a rise out of Kirishima, Bakugou swiped his palm brutally on the back of his friends head, his head flung forward rough smack and a grunt, mumbling something about Katsuki being a dick. You heaved out a sigh at the sight of your boyfriend, his face sheen with a thick layer of sweat and a radiant red flush adorned his cheeks and across his nose. His eyes still the blazing crimson you had come to adore so much puffy and irritated.

“Sorry ‘bout this (y/n)... I didn’t mean to wake ya but Bakugou has had too much to be alone right now, and I still have to take care of Kaminari so...”

Kirishima timidly began to caress the back of his spiky locks, giving you a sheepish grin and gave a quick glance at the blonde next to him who was struggling to keep himself from tumbling forward. Too exhausted to even argue, you simply waved Kirishima off and moved to grab hold of your intoxicated boyfriend. The strong aroma of what was seemingly Fireball mixed with rum made your nostrils flare in distaste, far from his usual caramel scent.

“It’s fine Kiri. Just get home safe ‘kay?”

“Yeah, have a goodnight (y/n)”

You slammed the door behind with a swing of your foot, you then proceeded to lead Katsuki into your bedroom with an arm wrapped around his bulky torso to keep him straight. He stumbled over his feet a couple times along the way there, leaning on you for support so he didn’t face plant or dive to the floorboards in any way. He was mumbling incoherently to himself, slumping against your shoulder which led to his breath brushing up against the side of your face and into your ear, the hot sensation produced a shiver down your spine. Katsuki interpreted this rather well, because he immediately attached himself to your neck and pressed soft, open-mouthed kissed to your soft spot. He knew exactly how to drive you crazy even if he couldn’t even fucking walk straight.

“I need you babygirl.”

“Not tonight ‘Suki, maybe tomorrow.”

Your eyes fluttered shut at the feeling of his searing hot lips against your pulse, his wet tongue slipping out everyone and then teasingly. You hummed softly and weakly cupped his scalding cheek to pull him from your nape, cursing whatever deity that made him so goddamn tempting.

“C’mon lets get you ready for bed hun.”

“Mmm... Babe...”

He groaned lowly as you sat him down at the foot of your bed, his large frame slouching over his knees. Crouching down you gripped his ankle and raised his seemingly massive leg into your lap, silently untying his shoes whilst feeling his vivid gaze burning holes into your skull. Placing his shoes to the side you began to fumble with his belt to get rid of his ebony jeans. Amid doing so, Katsuki had graced with a lazy smirk and casually reached his generous hands to your head, running his fingers through your (h/c) strands.

“Hell yeah, this is what I like to see baby.”

Fuck. The way the words fell from those lips made you utterly weak. Your face felt like it was on fire with how carnal his gaze was, you were sure you looked like a fish out of water with the shock and overwhelming arousment you were feeling. Nevertheless, it was short lived when Bakugou dropped onto the bed and burst into a fit of laughter and giggles just by your reaction. You couldn’t help but let out a small chuckle with a twitch of your brow, you gave a quick smack to his thigh and tiredly tugged at his jeans once he had calmed down. His endless taunting was never so apparent until now and frankly, it was debilitating and instigating all at once.

“Stay here. Please don’t try and get up, I don’t want you to hurt yourself.”

“Yeah.. Sure.”

He released a small giggle and his head rolled to his left shoulder, laying tired on his back upon your white duvet. You rose from your spot on the floor and exited the bedroom to get him a glass of water and some ibuprofen to somewhat relieve his hang over. You didnt think you’d return to find a very naked and very erect Katsuki laying splayed out across the bed, the remainder of his clothes discarded on the side of the bed and his arms crossed behind the back of his head, his sculpted six-pack presented to you in such a way it made you drool like a fucking dog.. And the same arrogant smirk he’d been adorning for entirety of his stay among your apartment, the same enticing glimmer in his optics.

“Oh my god Katsu! What the fuck?!”

You shrieked, averting your eyes to your feet and stumbled around to find his boxers or at least something to conceal his manhood. Bakugou cackled our in delight before he was met with his boxers on his face, picking up on a faint grumble and your feet stomping toward the nightstand next to him.

“Put on your damn boxers Bakugou! I’m too fuckin tired for this shit..” You hissed at your dopey, idiotic boyfriend as he just began to fumble with the garment and mishandle them up each leg, snickering throughout the whole process. “Okay okay... No need to yell. So much for trying to serve it to you like a Hot ‘n Ready Hotpocket.”

You’ve never laughed so hard in your damn laugh at that. He grinned at your shaking form, watching intently as you struggled to breath through each laugh and chuckle, snorts coming out every few seconds. God, you hated him and loved him simultaneously for doing this to you. You wanted to give in to his desire because Jesus the sex was with him was down right unbelievable. Man, did this hunk of a man know how to pleasure a woman and fuck was he exceptional at doing so. Although, at the same time you were tempted to knock his ass into sleep. Either way you couldn’t officially decide. After several moments you composed yourself, taking deep breaths as you made your way into your restroom. You managed to stifle a few chortles in the process of grabbing a rag and moistened it with lukewarm water from your sink, then returned thankful you hadn’t walked in on another naked Bakugou. Making your way around the king sized mattress you were pleased to find he had already taken the ibuprofen and the water both absent.

“Let me clean your face baby. It’s all sweaty and sticky.”

You mumbled out drowsily, sitting down beside Katsuki and tilting his chin up to face you and nimbly wipe his face clean. You looked up at him to make sure we wasn’t falling asleep and you froze, your heart erupted at the sight you were provided with. Katsuki’s face was free of his usual scowl, instead his eyebrows were relaxed, tilted upward and his lips in a small, soft smile. Those dazzling vermilion eyes staring into you, glistening with so much adoration and passion for you. You choked, mesmerized with how calm and serene he looked. The next words to tumble from his lips could’ve sent you melting onto the floor like wax.

“I am really really... Really in love with you (y/n).”

You believed every single word. You never even questioned it for a second in that moment. Really because you had no reason to discredit his love for you, he was a genuine man with a sharp and palpable tongue 24/7. You both were aware of that, and you didn’t complain. It was nice to have him so honest with you, and yes sometimes he wasn’t always nice with the way he expressed such honesty you had grown accustomed to it. Which is why you had been so shocked to see the brash and usually loud brute suddenly become so hushed and tender.

“I mean it princess. I love you so fuckin’ much. I know I don’t really show you how much I do like normal shitty couples, and i’m really fucking sorry for that but I love you with everything I got babe.. I know how much I can be a pain in the ass sometimes.. But.. I promise I’ll never stop lovin’ you, and I’ll show you every damn day just to fucking prove it. M’kay? Your fucking stuck with me until you’re too damn old to even try and fight me on it. I’m so happy I met you and I’m terrified at the same, ‘cause fuck babe I never knew I wanted love until now, until you. I never saw the fuckin’ point. So please jus.. Fuckin’ stay and be in love with me too.”

He refused to give you a chance to reply before he gingerly took your face into his hands and brought his lips to yours. The world fell away as you felt his soft, chapped lips against your own. The kiss with just as delicate as his words and touch, moving smoothly and overwhelming emotion. You immediately raised your hands to weave together behind his neck, pulling him in gently to deepen the kiss. In response to this, Katsuki rolled his tongue across your bottom lip in a silent request for an entrance. You whimpered, opening your mouth as his tongue began to explore your wet cavern, faintly tasting the alcoholic beverages from just hours before. His thumbs swiping tenderly across your cheekbones and your fingertips tangled themselves around his strong neck.

It wasn’t rushed or rough in any way, not like the many nights were he would intend on fucking you senseless, this is when he would truly let himself be vulnerable. Moments like these when he was so damn soft and loving toward you, and only you.

The kiss lasted for what felt like only a minute when in reality lasted 15 minutes. He left you seeking for more. Heaving for breath at the mere intensity of the make-out, resting his forehead against yours, noses brushing against each other gently. You both stayed like that for a moment, just basking in each other’s loving glow with stupid grins across your lips. You took your time taking in this hidden side of your boyfriend, loving each second of it while you still could before he would return to his sullen self. You reveled in every moment you lost yourself in his soft caress, were it was nobody but the two of you acting almost as one. In which you could feel close to him away from intercourse and instead with sensual kisses and grazes. Nonetheless, he was certainly the half that made you whole.

“I’m in love with you too Katsu’.”

╚═══*.·:·.☽✧ ✦ ✧☾.·:·.*═══╝

Thank you so much for reading! Request are open, and feel free to leave feedback or ask any questions! ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔ

- 𝖑𝖎𝖟 ☾ ✩

𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙙 : (𝟔/𝟐𝟏/𝟐𝟎 - 𝟏:𝟓𝟓 𝐚.𝐦.)

[jlalafics]

So this is kind of random and I don’t know if you’re accepting prompts but this summer I saw the most beautiful man in the world while on vacation at the beach. He was a lifeguard and he looked exactly like Peeta. I spent the entire day staring at him completely gobsmacked. I would love a lifeguard!Peeta Drabble if you have time and get inspired 🏖

I hope you enjoy @mrspeetamellark! It has definite potential for more and I had a lot of fun writing since it’s slight based off a favorite rom-com/book of mine.

___

“What brings you to District 4?”

Katniss turned to Finnick, her cousin’s boyfriend, as she spread her towel onto the warm sand.

“She’s running away,” Annie informed the man, plopping down. “There’s a man involved.”

Finnick grinned, joining them on the sand, his arm wrapping Annie’s shoulders.

“District 4 is the best place to run,” he remarked. “So, what did this bad man do to you?”

Katniss shook her head, an amused smile dancing over her lips.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Standing, she pulled the white tunic she wore over her head. “I don’t want to mention anything having to do with guys for the rest of the summer.”

“God, I hate you.” Annie looked to her, grinning. “How do you have a tan when you live in a sunless wasteland?”

“District 12 is not that bad,” Katniss protested.

“Then why are you running?” her cousin retorted, tossing her long dark hair, and batting her lashes innocently at her.

Katniss flipped her off in response before heading toward the surf.

++++++

Peeta noticed her immediately.

It was the braid, the way it moved behind her in an elegant wave mimicking her graceful steps.

From the lifeguard post, he followed the trio as they headed down the sand before finding a spot to his right. The bronze-haired man snuggled against one of the girls—thankfully, the one he wasn’t staring at—as they chatted.

The girl stood suddenly, pulling her dress over her head and he felt the immediate stirring in his groin as she revealed the deep red bikini to his appreciative gaze.

She spoke briefly to the couple, flashing a bright smile before giving them the finger.

Peeta watched as she moved towards the water, eyes out on the horizon. His eyes briefly looked around the rest of the beach, making sure that there wasn’t anyone else that needed his attention. There were a few groups, though most of them were sticking to the sand or only along the shore.

When Peeta went to look for the girl, he immediately started—she was too far out.

“Whoa.” He was already jumping down from his post, his eyes following her as she moved along the waves. “Come back…”

However, she didn’t.

Every nerve in his body tensed, and Peeta immediately rushed into the water, avoiding an area he knew was a possible rip current.  Swimming towards her direction, he saw that she realized that she was caught in an undertow, her arms starting to flail in panic.

So, he did the only thing he could. Peeta swam towards her knowing that he would get caught in it as well.

It felt like hours had passed before he reached her and Peeta could see that she was tiring from her struggle. He immediately wrapped an arm around her waist, and her grey eyes caught his, relief filling them.

“We have to swim parallel to the shore,” he shouted over the rushing water. “Do you understand?”

She nodded and together they began to swim, one arm supporting her, as they moved adjacent along the beach to their right. As they paddled along the current, Peeta kept an eye on her, making sure that she was still conscious.

“What’s your name?” he asked, trying to gauge if she was receptive.

“K-Katniss,” she told him shakily.

“Peeta.”

Katniss nodded at him, her arm moving along the water to help them swim. “Peeta…I don’t want to die.”

“You’re not going to die,” he assured her.

They were already heading back towards the shore. He could see her friends standing on the sand.

“How do you know?” she screamed back at him. “Another wave could just knock us over and—bam! We’re gone! I can’t die! I haven’t done anything worth remembering! I haven’t gone anywhere! This is my first trip out of my district for fuck sakes! I haven’t gotten my dream job! Or, gotten my own house! I haven’t had an orgasm!”

That got his attention quickly. “What?”

“I was seeing this guy…we’ve been friends for so long…and it just seemed right to transition…” she explained. “…but when he goes down on me—it’s all wrong! It’s like he’s just ringing a doorbell, the way he prods at my vagina. And he leaves the door open when he goes in my bathroom!”

“Yeah, you’re not even married,” Peeta remarked.

“I ran away to District 4 because I heard he was going to propose.” Katniss turned to him. “I can’t marry a man whose kiss I can’t stand. Did I mention that I haven’t even been kissed the right way?!”

“The right way?”

“Yes, you know…when you see stars…and all that shit—that has never happened to me!” She began to cry. “And if I die, I’m going to die a jobless, apartment renting, orgasm less, badly-kissed loser!”

“You’re not going to die,” he repeated.

Her arms clung around his neck, her cheek pressed to his, and Peeta could smell the saltiness of the ocean along her skin.

He had to wonder what she actually smelled like.

“How do you know?” she sobbed.

“Stand up.”

Her crying immediately ceased and slowly Katniss stood, finding sand below her. She looked up to see that they were only a few paces from where Finnick and a crying Annie stood at the shore.

“Oh,” she replied sheepishly.

“Hold onto me. Your limbs are properly exhausted from trying to fight the undertow,” Peeta told her.

Together, they made their way onto the beach and her friends rushed over.

“Ohmigod!” Annie sobbed, pulling Katniss into her arms. “What the hell were you thinking?”

“I wasn’t,” Katniss admitted as Peeta helped her sit on the sand. “I’m sorry. I got distracted.”

“Thankfully, a lifeguard was on duty,” Finnick said in relief. He turned to the man, holding out his hand. “Finnick Odair, thank you so much. Katniss is visiting Annie, her cousin and my girlfriend, from District 12 and doesn’t have much swimming experience—obviously.”

Peeta shook it. “It’s my job to make sure that everyone stays safe on the beach.” His eyes went to Katniss and he knelt before her. “Are you okay?”

She nodded, her chest warming at the care in his voice, and gave him a smile.

“I’m fine, embarrassed for not being more aware, but overall alright,” she assured him. “Thank you, Peeta.”

He took her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. “I’m just glad you’re alright.”

“Is there anything I can do to repay you?” she asked suddenly. “Bring you lunch while you’re on duty? Or donate towards some sort of lifeguard fund?”

Her voice trailed off as she realized how she had practically revealed a few too many intimate details of her life to the handsome blond.

“You can let me take you out on a date.”

Her eyes shot up to his cerulean ones. “What?”

“I’d like to take you out and show you around District 4,” he said. “You told me you’ve never been anywhere. That this is your first time out of District 12. I’d like you to experience a few things…before you die and all.”

He grinned in amusement, seeing her blush.

Annie joined her cousin on the sand, leaning towards her so that Peeta and Finnick were out of ears’ length.

“Go out with the man,” her cousin muttered. “He’s cute, fit, and hasn’t even looked down once at your exposed tit.”

Katniss gasped, pulling the cloth triangle of her bikini top to cover herself immediately.

“Annie! Finnick and Peeta just saw my tit!”

“I’m not worried about Finnick—my boobs look way better,” Annie retorted. “Peeta is obviously into you, and he’s totally respectful. Plus, he wants to show you District 4—like Aladdin wanted to show Jasmine a whole new world…” Her cousin sighed. “And imagine if that whole new world was his bedroom ceiling—”

“Ohmigod, I can’t believe you’re even thinking of that,” Katniss said, shaking her head. She looked to where Finnick and Peeta were chatting by the lifeguard post. “He is really nice and unbelievably handsome…and the washboard abs. I never knew I’d be into…blonds.”

“You’ve been stuck in gloomy old 12, that’s why,” Annie informed her. “Say yes…say yes…say yes…” Her chanting was getting louder and she began to add some fist pumps. “SAY YES…SAY YES…SAY YE—”

“Alright!” Katniss jumped from her seat and went to the man. Peeta turned, giving her a smile. “I’d love to go out with you and see District 4.”

“Perfect. I’ll pick you up at six,” he replied jovially.

“I’m staying with Annie. We’re at the blue house, about two blocks away from here.”

“I know it,” he told her. Peeta leaned over and kissed her cheek. “I’m looking forward to it.”

Katniss found herself grinning back. “Me, too.”

“Maybe you can tell me what else you would like to do before you die,” he suggested.

“Are you going to help cross some things off my list?” she countered.

They were riding that fine line of dangerously flirting.

His blue eyes blazed, causing her stomach to flip. “If you’ll allow it.”

She couldn’t help her reply.

“I’m on vacation. I just might.”

 FIN…for now?

[jd-loves-fiction]

➤ 【1】 𝟤 𝒾𝓈 𝒶 𝓅𝒶𝒾𝓇, 𝟥 𝒾𝓈 𝒶 𝓅𝒶𝓇𝓉𝓎

➤ Finding 1 guy seemed unthinkable as you found yourself getting lost while going to meet with your friend. So imagine your surprise when you meet 2.

➤ pairings: suna x reader | hirugami x reader

➤ genre: college!au; fluff; angst

➤ wc: 4.7k

➤ status: ongoing

➤ 🌙 Special thanks to @offendedfishnoises​ and @glorified-red​ for all the love and help🥰🥺 and if you want to be added to the taglist, let me know ❤

"Just follow the directions and you'll get there, don't worry." Was what your friend had told you a few days before Christmas break in order to help you find the place you were meant to meet at.

Which you had been looking for, for about 30 minutes more than what she said would be necessary.

You were lost.

And to add to the misery, your phone had no reception, meaning you had no way to figure out where you had wandered off to as the cold winter air licked at your flushed cheeks, growing more frigid by the minute as you continued to walk forward.

Days before, when you noticed you had a week off from classes due to Christmas arriving, you had quickly made plans with a friend of yours: to go out and find you a hot date. This as you were both tired of your complaining.

You had already attempted this on the last day of college at a park near it, to no avail as no one of interest had shown up (aside from some friends of yours).

This time you were meant to meet her at a cafe she was very familiar with and a bit far from your house, but she assured you that lots of your type of people hung out there and that it was easy to get to.

The second part was either a lie or your mental map was just that bad.

Despite the fact that the sun should still be high in the sky - were it not being hidden by gloomy clouds - by the mid-afternoon hour, the temperature was nearly unbearable, the icy cold swiftly getting under your clothes and chilling you to the bone as you contemplated calling your friend and explaining your predicament to her.

You looked around the street you found yourself in the middle of, checking for some place where you could protect yourself from the unforgiving winter air as you attempted to message your friend without having your fingers fall off.

You spotted a small cafe in between a drugstore and a shoe store, with a large glass front that allowed you to see all the wooden tables inside, behind a pub table settled against the window, where potted plants sat.

The soft, golden light shining on the plants created an invitation, hard to ignore. Pushing open the door, the low hum of friendly chatter followed by the deep aroma of coffee met your nose and the sight of various homemade pastries warmed you instantly as you rubbed your hands together.

The space was scarcely crowded, expected from the side of town you assumed to have wandered into, but the atmosphere seemed warm and just full enough that it felt lively but not overwhelming.

You ordered your chosen beverage and sat at a table near the wall with it as you inspected the shop. Most of its occupants were teenagers and young adults, either chatting amongst themselves or typing away on their laptops while sipping coffee or eating various kinds of delicious looking pastries.

The walls were a light beige, contrasting with the dark furniture and a large wall with a painting of two birds atop a tree branch caught your eye, until you remembered what you had gone there to do: check-in with your friend and figure out where you were.

You took out your phone while looking at the sign on the wall with the WiFi password and waiting for it to connect as you looked around once more.

Your eyes skimmed over mostly natural or brightly colored hair, floating over simple waves and more intricate hairdos just before your eyes drifted down and caught a pair of big, brown ones who seemed to study you with a sweet sort of intensity, almost as if in awe. That made you blush, and not from the cold this time. Just before you looked away and tried to find something to keep you busy as your phone lay somewhat forgotten by your arm, facedown on the table.

The image of the handsome man whom you'd locked gazes with remained at the forefront of your mind as you took out your most recent fixation, a book of theories about soulmates, to avoid looking anymore out of place and awkward. He might've been smiling, or it could've just been your hopeful imagination. You decided not to dwell on it lest you fool yourself with hopelessly romantic deceptions.

You had come out to find a date. But not without your friend's help!

That would certainly end in disaster.

The words before you sucked you in, capturing your attention enough that your previous worries were all but an itch in the back of your mind as your cheeks finally cooled.

A notification reaching your phone broke your focus, making you pick it up to see a message from your friend, from about 10 minutes prior, saying that she couldn't make it due to a family emergency.

Well, at least you didn't leave her hanging.

Sighing, you placed your phone in your pocket, taking another sip of your drink and returning to your book.

Just before a shadow settled over you.

"Do you believe in them?" A voice asked, calm and smooth, from in front of you, to where you directed your eyes.

You looked to where you expected to see the man's face, only to be met with his broad chest, clad in a baby blue hoodie, before you looked up and up, and up and up...

God, he's tall.

As your eyes met his light brown ones - the ones from before which had examined you closely, you noted - he smiled, sweet and charming, inviting but not pushy as he waited for your answer.

"I--," You cleared your throat as you felt your voice begin to crack, almost sure you saw his eyes flicker with delight. You nodded before attempting to speak again. "Just not in such a… clear-cut way, I guess." You spoke shyly as his brows raised in interest, motioning towards the chair in front of you, to which you nodded, making him sit.

"I'm Hirugami Sachirō, by the way." He said, still with a smile, nodding as you told him yours. "Please do continue." He tilted his head cutely as he gazed at you, expectant as you thought extra hard about what answer to give the man you were currently trying to impress, making his short wavy, fluffy-looking hair move slightly over his forehead.

"Well, I believe everyone has someone that they're destined to be with, someone who just fits. But I don't think everyone is meant to find them, for starters." You explained, focusing on your words instead of on the blush growing brighter as you went on.

"As in, they don't deserve it?" Hirugami inquired, leaning forward as he rested his cheek on his hand. Cute.

"No, I mean, maybe they're from some other time period or a place they could never travel to. I feel like sometimes the world itself just makes it difficult."

"Makes sense." He said, nodding with a thoughtful pout and chuckling lowly as you refused to meet his interested gaze. "Which part are you at?" He motioned to the still open book with his chin.

"Oh! This chapter is about the possibility of having more than one soulmate. Which I think is somewhat neat. What do you think?"

His eyes widened slightly at being directed a question, before humming reflectively for a moment before speaking, "That sounds unfair, doesn't it? I feel like you had to have been a really good person in your last life to get that."

"You're trying to bring karma into this? It's already complex enough as it is." You chuckled, watching as his smile broadened at the sound, before shrugging.

"Exactly why we need to consider all the possibilities." He shrugs, leaning back and making you suddenly miss the close proximity that seemed so intimidating at first. His legs brushed yours for a moment before he adjusted his position slightly to sit somewhat properly.

"Are you a philosopher, or something?" You asked, impressed by his knowledge of such an unusual topic. "I mean, this is something not a lot of people know about." You explained after he raised a curious brow at your question (probably meant to tease, you guessed).

"No,” his hand came up to bashfully cover the growing smile on his face, "I'm actually a vet student, I just like learning." He said, shrugging as if it was the simplest thing. "And maybe I'm a little bit of a romantic at heart."

Your lips pursed as you tried to keep your smile from getting too wide as you felt giddy with fondness for the whole-package of a man in front of you. "Is that so?" You asked, not sure what else to say to that, looking down as you traced random shapes on the table with your finger while blushing.

You couldn't see it, but Hirugami had a very serious, contemplative expression on his face as you did this.

Would it be too forward to just ask you out then and there? You seemed quite reserved... Would you be creeped out?

But if he didn't do it then, he was afraid he'd never get his chance again. Plus, he didn't want this warm, fuzzy feeling you caused in his chest to ever disappear. He wanted to hold onto it for a little longer.

"You could find out just how much of a romantic I can be..." He trailed off, inspecting your face for any signs that you might not be interested, but all he saw was how your blush deepened as your mind worked faster than his lips, so he made his move, leaning forward slightly as your eyes widened meekly. "By letting me take you out somewhere. Right now."

Your eyes snapped to his, blinking in confusion as he grinned, your blush somehow becoming even redder.

That was almost too smooth.

"Right now? It's pretty late. Where would we go?"

"Don't you like surprises?" His adorably jovial expression nearly made you give in.

"What if I don't?" You asked back with a small smirk that you promptly hid behind your nearly finished drink as you took a sip.

He sighed exaggeratedly, before leaning forward again, even closer than before as his hand fell beside your stagnant one, mirroring your position as his leg brushed yours without moving away this time. "There's this really fun Christmas market downtown... I'm sure you'd like it." He spoke with a high pitched voice, hoping to convince you with his puppy eyes and batting eyelashes. Not that you needed any of that to be convinced to go on a date with such an attractive man.

"Sure." You responded, mentally cringing at your lame reply. But Hirugami didn't seem to mind. He smiled broadly at you, taking your empty cup and throwing it away as you packed your stuff before walking towards where he stood at the entrance.

He was even taller than you thought. He had to be at least 1,90m, you noticed as you stood beside him, dwarfed in comparison. His long, beige coat made him seem even taller, complimenting his hoodie as well as the light blue jeans adorning his long legs.

"You'll like it, I promise." He said before pushing open the door for you before getting out of the shop and into the unforgiving cold of dusk, seemingly much colder than it actually was for people coming out of a warm and inviting environment you'd been in before.

You smiled at each other for a moment as you rubbed your hands together, wishing you'd brought some gloves as he led you closer to downtown.

You admired Hirugami's side profile as you walked in somewhat comfortable silence, broken up occasionally by his humming. You willed yourself to say something this time, instead of letting him lead the conversation.

Before you could come up with a topic, a kid ran in front of you to go join his friends, almost making you lose your balance if not for Hirugami's gentle hand on your lower back steadying you.

After making sure that you were alright, he turned to the group of kids gathered in a circle, with you doing the same, as they picked snowballs out of the mount they'd created before placing pieces in their mouths.

"I remember when I was that stupid." Hirugami said, smiling sarcastically, before scrunching his nose disapprovingly as the kids shouted excitedly about what they'd just done.

"You couldn't have been that stupid." You chuckled as you eyed the kids worryingly while you passed as you continued walking.

"My thinking license was revoked that day." He replied, chuckling as he reminisced, making you giggle as you talked.

"Is it still revoked?"

"If you keep smiling like that it will be."

Your eyes widened at the unexpected line, looking away as his eyes remained on you intently with a smile on his lips, breaking out into a full laugh as you looked down embarrassedly.

"Well," You began after cleaning your throat, hoping it'd distract him from your burning cheeks, "do you want to expand on that?"

"So, one Christmas, my siblings and I decided to give our mother a very expensive pair of diamond earrings. Fancy stuff." His humorous tone made you giggle. "And pretty important, since without them, none of us would have any gifts to give her. I think you can kind of see where this is going by now."

"Or maybe not, because I haven't even introduced the most important character yet, but we'll get there." You raised an intrigued brow, smiling at his excited narration. "On Christmas day, our dog was left unsupervised near the presents for a few minutes, and when we came back, she had a very special and very expensive box in her mouth." He paused for dramatic effect as you cringed in sympathy. 

He looked over at you to check if you were still listening, to find you with a scrunched up, adorably red, nose. The corner of his lips inched upwards softly, a blush dusted his cheeks and not from the cold before he regained his composure by looking ahead and making sure he didn’t stumble.

"And so, I tried to approach her and she ran away through the open window and I attempted to follow her... Only it didn't turn out as smooth as I had imagined." He sighed as you smiled with pity.

"And that's why Peanut isn't allowed anywhere near the presents."

“Peanut? Is that her name?" You asked curiously.

"Yeah! Wait, I have a picture right here." He said, pulling out his phone and showing you his lock screen, which was a picture of Hirugami and Peanut from years ago judging by how young he looked.

"She's adorable." You commented with a fond smile as you enjoyed the large, happy smile on young Hirugami's lips as he held his pet tightly, just before it was stored away in the man's pocket.

"Yeah, she takes after me."

Silence.

"I'll take it you think I'm cute."

"I plead the fifth." You both laughed loudly, earning odd stares from passersby that you paid no mind, as you approached a more crowded area close to the market. You would never tell him, but you were glad your joke was able to keep you from admitting that you did, indeed, find young Hirugami absolutely adorable. So cute that your heart could barely take it, with his bouncy looking hair and a toothy smile spreading over his round cheeks.

"But yeah, I got a whole mouthful of snow against my will and it wasn't anywhere near fun. So to see kids doing it willingly... Choices were certainly made." He said sarcastically as you laughed, nodding in agreement as you approached the wide plaza where the market was stationed, bustling with people and bright fairy lights.

"Come on! There's a stall this way that I buy from every year, and it never disappoints."

Hirugami led you towards a small stall with steam coming out of the windows as the worker fulfilled the people at the front of the queue's orders.

You stood by each other in line as you waited for your turn. "What kind of chocolate do you like?" He asked nonchalantly, and as you focused you could smell the scent of chocolate above the others.

"Surprise me." You said, not knowing exactly what he was planning to give you, but expecting something good nonetheless.

"I thought you didn't like surprises." He replied cheekily, smirking down at you as the line moved forward and you with it.

"Only on certain occasions."

"I'll keep that in mind." He said with a cheesy wink that still made you giggle. "You can stay back while I order, it'll be easier that way." He suggested as you got close to the start of the line, to which you nodded before motioning towards the fountain at the center of the plaza, waving as you walked to it.

You settled on the edge of it, taking out your phone and sending a message to your friend saying 'I have a lot to tell you.'

Just a few meters away stood a man who you were somewhat familiar with, tapping almost furiously on his screen, so unlike the deadpan expression on his face.

Bastard: Just fucking do it pussy🙄 It's the perfect opportunity!

So, clearing his throat, the man stepped forward, towards where you sat also looking at your phone.

"Here I thought you were the prettiest statue on the fountain." The man spoke from in front of you, making you look up from your phone to be met grayish-yellow narrow eyes that tugged at your memory in a familiar sort of way, though you couldn't place where you'd seen them before.

"You calling me stiff?" You asked with a blank look, holding in a smile as you finally realized where you knew him from, and by the widening of his eyes as he looked you over properly, he finally realized too.

"No! Ah fuck, aren't you in one of my classes?" The man asked, nose scrunched up in confusion as he squinted at you.

You nodded, telling him your name and what classes you shared (which were actually 2).

As he stuffed his cold hands in his pockets, his various rings caught on the fabric slightly, the glinting sliver on his pale hands matched the chains around his neck and the dangling earrings he wore. He looked down with furrowed brows which jumped up as a lightbulb seemed to go off in his head as he looked you over once more.

"Wait, was it two classes? Sorry, I don't really pay much attention to anything that happens in class." He said apologetically, rubbing his neck as he shifted from one chunky white sneaker to the other.

"Yeah, I can tell, even from the back row." You responded with a smirk, remembering the sight of the back of his spiky, dark brown hair, sitting two rows in front of you, doing everything but paying attention to the lesson. Fiddling with his jewelry or his phone,throwing anything he can get his hands on at one of his friends or simply just talking to them during the whole class. "If you didn't recognize me, then why'd you come talk to me?"

"Huh..." He trailed off, brows furrowed as if the answer was obvious.

He saw someone cute and tried to flirt with them, simple as that.

"Is that your friend?" Hirugami asked as he approached you and the new stranger, Suna, with two warm crepes with chocolate, narrowing his eyes at the other man slightly. "Hope you like Nutella." He commented as he watched you eye the sweets, handing one over to you which you took gratefully.

“We have a few classes together.” Suna said teasingly, taking a step closer to your side he kept his fox-like eyes on Hirugami’s narrowed ones with a challenging smile.

The air felt hot, slightly searing, despite how cold your hands felt, caught between two, very tall - although Hirugami was slightly taller than Suna, accentuated by his slouching -, very attractive, men.

"Well, we should get back to our date, I'm sure they can talk to you again in class next week.” The taller man said, a smile which you recognized as clearly being fake after such a short time with him on his face, taking a pleased bite out of his snack which you were also eating in an attempt to warm yourself up and distract from the tense atmosphere.

The sweet chocolate felt wonderfully warm on your taste buds, so good in fact that it nearly made you forget all about your surroundings for a moment, that is, until a hand was placed on your shoulder.

“Well, I don’t know if you noticed but your date seems cold." Said Suna - the owner of the hand on your shoulder - spitefully, smirking at the other man who blinked at your devious classmate, before they both turned to you.

Suna took your nearly finished snack from your hand, placing it into Hirugami’s opened hand as he gaped at the man - who donned some impressively sharp eyeliner - speechless as he took your hands into his pale and warm ones.

His hands were big around yours, the rings’ various textures scuffing against your skin as he attempted to create some friction tightening his grip to get the blood flowing and massaging each finger and the palms to help, breathing onto them as well as Hirugami looked in realization.

His hands had seemed cold at first glance when he’d first approached you - not like you’d been paying much attention to them, of course not - due to how pale and slim they were, seemingly incapable to provide much warmth despite being bigger than yours. But as he slowly brought warmth back to your digits, you realized their potential. He was gentle with his touches, but had a firm hold against your skin, hands so warm you wondered if he minded sacrificing his own warmth for yours.

Hirugami’s initial reaction was to chide Suna for putting the moves on his date, before he noticed the way your hands had lost some of their color, starting to regain it as the shorter man held them softly in his. He felt a sort of acceptance or perhaps even fondness for Suna’s actions, considering he saw what you needed before he could and acted without hesitation.

Maybe Hirugami's first thought of Suna, that he was a crafty man out to steal his date, was off by just a bit.

Not like he'd ever admit that. 

He still thought he was too crafty though.

His shoulders sagged as he watched the way Suna gazed at you intently, your cheeks pinker than before. His brows furrowed as his chest tightened protectively, jealousy swirling in his gut.

You looked over at the man with the beige coat, noticing the crestfallen expression he wore as he stared down at the food in his hands.  A half melted, nearly finished sag of chocolate; once prepared with care to bring warmth and comfort, now lay cold, shapeless even. His eyes stared down at it, refusing to look at the result of his carelessness unfolding before him, choosing instead to focus on the hopefulness he could still feel as he looked at the sweet snack.

“I should probably start heading home.”

“I’ll walk you to the station!” Hirugami said quickly in response, not being content with just sitting back and wallowing in his mistakes. Those days are over.

“Then, I’ll be going. See you on monday.” Suna said cheekily with a wink as he waved, eyes solely focused on you while you smiled while waving back.

The man then turned to Hirugami, giving a nod that could’ve been respectful, but he took it as mocking, since that seemed to be the only expression Suna could muster. But he nodded back nonetheless, turning away with an arm around your shoulders.

“Is this the right way?” You asked as you headed the opposite way from where you came from, looking up at Hirugami as he took his arm from around you with a blush as he avoided your gaze.

“We can get to the station this way pretty fast and I want to show you something.”

You simply nodded, clueless to the reason why he was leading you down this path.

He felt as if he had something to prove. As if he had to be better than his “rival” (who wasn’t really a rival at all, to his knowledge).

Just like when he was younger, he had to be better.

As the two of you walked in comfortable silence, you couldn't help but gaze down at your feet. Colorful lights reflected brightly off of the worn stone path, diverting your gaze upwards. Figures made of lights greeted you as you did. Hirugami smiled fondly at you after you looked up to meet his gaze, he watched as the lights reflected off of your eyes, your face becoming redder at the eye contact. The hot fuzziness you felt in your stomach forced you to look away from his intense look.

You walked side by side through the streets, commenting on the lights you saw and admiring the way they hung between buildings, right above your heads. 

At one point, Hirugami slipped his hand in yours, intertwining your fingers for good measure. His hand felt big, warm and soft, slightly bigger than Suna's with fingers just a little thicker--

Wait. 

Why were you still thinking about Suna?

Why did your mind still linger on the feeling of his rings on your hands or the way his razor sharp eyes zeroed in on you like you were the most expensive piece of jewelry he'd ever seen?

You would've felt bad for Hirugami, if your mind wasn't on him too. 

It seemed impossible for it not to be with how calming his presence was, easily lulling you into a sense of comfort like the sound of soft waves caressing the sand on a sunny summer day. 

Somewhere you sort of would rather be at right now. 

"Here we are." Hirugami's voice cut through the fog in your mind, stopping in front of the station and giving you an adorably awkward smile, swinging your still joined hands back and forth. This caused you to giggle at his antics while he laughed loudly at the released tension.

Neither of you wanted to speak, too afraid to ruin the pleasant atmosphere, knowing that you’d have to part from each other once you did.

Hirugami squeezed your hand once, then twice, then again as you did the same, rubbing his finger over the back of your hand as he took a step closer. His body heat enveloped you as he stood close enough for you to notice that his eyelashes were slightly lighter than his hair.

His hand raised hesitantly, brushing the side of your face with a feather-light finger that went around your head until he cradled it. You craned your head up in order to look at him as he looked down at you fondly, thumb stroking your red cheek. His big brown eyes roamed your features, as if committing them to memory with fond care.

“I’m glad we met. Call me anytime, ok?” He whispered, each word brushing your face before you nodded. His heart made his chest vibrate with its strength as he breathed deeply while looking intently into your eyes, nervous but elated at the happenings of his day. Well, most of them.

Hirugami’s face neared yours suddenly, eyes half-lidded while yours widened, before he placed a long and tender kiss on your forehead, making your eyes slip closed for a moment, the feeling of his soft, plump lips against your skin making your head feel light and a pleasant warmth to hum beneath your skin.

You stepped away from him slowly, hands attempting to hold each other for as long as possible before you walked towards the station, turning around every few steps to shoot him a smile or a wave before he disappeared from your view with an animated wave and a wide, toothy smile.

You took out your phone, pulling up your friend’s contact and ignoring the messages she’d sent already in response to your previous, cryptic text, and sending another message.

I have even more to tell you.

[alecxaheart]

Wish I Were | Kim Seungmin Oneshot

✎ Genre : High School Student AU, Angst, Fluff

✎ Pairings : Kim Seungmin X Reader (?)

✎ Word Count : 1.1k words

✎ Synopsis : Winter has already passed, yet Seungmin is getting colder and colder as time flies by.

✎ Warnings : Explicit Language

✎. . . Another angsty oneshot but a song inspired one. It's been a while since I wrote a very short oneshot. Btw, the whole oneshot is in Seungmin's Point of View. Enjoy my loves, mwah. <3

Kim Seungmin.

Save the date, 3rd of December. Where in the middle of a snowfall, sunshine appeared out of the blue. The time I was saved from the inner demons haunting me, from the bothering cold of winter. The time I never thought would come to the point that I lost care for myself.

With a small yet simple gesture, I was saved. She came just in time and the best part of her rescue was probably her giving me her soft light-tinted blue sweater. " It looks better on you than it did on me, Seungminnie, " She giggled as we sat in front of her fireplace, my cup of coffee laid unfinished on the table. Her arms around my waist while I lay my head down on her shoulder. All the warmth I received on that day was completely comfortable. From the fireplace, the hot coffee she offered, her sweater and her care and love. I couldn't ask for more than that to feel enough.

With a small yet simple gesture, I couldn't help but fall.

Fall.. In Love?

Just another new start allotted for this school year happened on this very day. Months had already passed ever since me and Yuri met. Right now, it's just me and her having a wonderful conversation. Her beautiful smile appeared once in a while with a small chuckle as we continued to just pass some time before class started.

" No way, this happened when you hit the baseball with your bat? You're that strong? " Her eyes twinkled as I showed her the picture my friend, Bang Chan, posted on Instagram. I responded with a nod and a hum, smiling.

" It looks like teeth marks at first glance, " Both of us giggled in unison while I tucked my phone back in my pockets. " But hey, that's really an impressive strength. You'll be in my speed dial in case I want you to kick some asses for me. "

Then there was a short silent pause in the area as the main doors opened. I took a glance towards it to figure out what caused such distraction from multiple individuals. And I must say or rather I could tell it already, he's definitely gonna be the elephant in the room.

His face defines ethereal, perfectly sculpted by the Gods to the point that they placed a star beneath his eye. He was indeed shining, everyone blinded by his beauty.

What broke my heart was when I took a glance back at you, you were one of them. I saw your eyes sparkling, filled with adoration towards the newcomer. You couldn't look away, trapped into his spell as he walked towards us. He caught your attention and you couldn't help but fawn over him more. What a sight for sore eyes.

I slowly distanced myself away when he was now onto you, both of you sharing smiles brighter than the blue sky and exchanging a few words. You're too lost in his eyes to notice my presence vanishing from your area, too lost in love while I'm starting to lose love itself. You never looked at me the same way as you did to him.

With one last glance, I witnessed how you got him so mesmerized before I die.

Or Fall.. Apart?

Back in place, like it was the start of winter once again. The time I was emotionally and mentally going downhill. But the difference is that it's far from almost winter, the sun shines too bright these days and I hate it.

Messages

💟 : Hey, can't meet you up today

💟 : I promised Hyunjin I would go with him, sorry

It's okay. : KSM

Go and have fun with your man. :) : KSM

Read – 5:03PM

Closing the door, I leaned my head back on it before silently letting my body fall onto the ground with the phone in hand, the picture of the two of us showing in the lock screen. I knew that behind me, behind this door stood Hyunjin and you having the greatest time of your lives. Exchanging words, smiles, and laughter with one another.

The scene I saw a few moments ago played. I walked into the rooftop, supposedly to be looking for you – which I did but never thought of it to be something like this. I watched you two there standing before the golden sun setting in the horizon then he held your hand. You, too, gave one of your sweaters to him. Putting his arms around your shoulder afterwards when you two took a seat on the ground, your head resting on his chest as you both took in the scenery.

I wanted to hate him so much, for he took away my chances of even having the confidence to confront you and confess my feelings towards you, ruining all of my plans to have the greatest life I've ever had in my grasp. Although as much as I wanted to, I just couldn't bring myself to do so. Hyunjin-hyung never treated you or anyone else badly, being the angel that he is. He's also true to his feelings, I overheard it from a conversation he had with Minho that he likes you, the same way you like him. However, I did prefer him not existing at all – thinking that maybe it would go the way I wanted it to be if he was never there.

In the end, I'll only get colder and colder to the point that my heart will freeze, slowly distancing myself away from you. While you're looking beyond exquisite than ever with a smile brighter than the sun, twinkling stars adorning your eyes and the pinkness of your cheeks – all of it was because of Hwang Hyunjin. Just for the sake of your eternal happiness, I have to disenthrall you.

Laying down alone on the bed, in the middle of my gloomy bedroom, drowning in my own pool of thoughts. Wearing the light-tinted blue sweater to feel the warmth back in the 3rd of December that I always loved, but I knew it would never be the same as before. Today, she wouldn't be able to save me. This would've been the aftermath back then.

Eyes red plus the visible dark bags underneath it came all from excessive crying and insomnia. Body tired like hell. Lost my appetite. Pale skin and dry lips. Too many emotions mixed up in my heavy chest. My mind screaming and yelling in agony yet none of it was heard since I lost my own voice as well. All in all, I feel like shit.

Beside me laid my journal, the messed up pages filled with black ink shown. The words " Wish I Were Hyunjin " were mindlessly written on the pages, repeatedly scattered.

Why would you ever kiss me?

I'm not even half as pretty

You gave him your sweater

It's just polyester

But you like him better

Wish I were...

Breaking the silence, a knock on the wooden door was heard out of the blue.

End.

[1-800-channie]

Guardian Angel

PAIRING | Angel Chan & Female Reader

GENRE | Cute / Angst / Suggestive

TYPE | Long Fiction

WC | 5000+ Words

SUMMARY | “After suffering more than you could handle, God sends you a heaven made gift. He sent you a Guardian Angel. His name is Christopher Bang Chan and he is the most handsome creature you have ever laid your eyes on. Will you be able to live with him everyday without any kind of second thoughts? Will Chris be able to take care of you without falling for you? Something tells me that it won’t be. But if, the both of you fall in temptation, there is a punishment that will hurt more than death.”

[Part 1] [Part 2]

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(100 Days Left)

Not everyone deserves to have someone look after them. Someone ideal who can prepare dinner after a long day of work, or someone who understands how you feel and will support you no matter what. Surely you weren't one of those people.

God always had his eye on you, especially considering you constantly prayed to him in tears, imploring him to support you in some way. You were extremely exhausted from all the crimes that occurred in your life. The cross was excessively heavy for you; your wasted body couldn't take it anymore.

It all happened on a rainy night. You were working on a recent design for a client. Your body felt all worn out from serving all night and day at the restaurant. Your eyes were burning though you couldn’t bring yourself to stop, not when the design was turning out so well.

As you looked out the sliding window, you noticed that it was raining. The chilly raindrops caused an aesthetic feeling that helped you feel inspired. The only light inside your apartment was from the laptop you were currently using. Outside however, the only source of light you saw was the stroke of lightning from the dark sky that alarmed you.

Ever since you were a young girl you had a fear of lightning. However, now that you were an adult, you couldn’t let it distract you no more, you had to continue working. You did your best to ignore the strokes of lightning outside as you continued to distract yourself for a little longer.

As your eyes carefully analysed the finished product, your mind wandered somewhere else. You remembered how you used to live in your hometown with your parents in a humble environment while working on a company of Web Design, something you studied for. The boss loved your hardworking and creative self. Therefore, when he got the chance, he gave you the main seat at the table of the company, in Seoul.

In about a month or so you moved to the massive city of Seoul. It was unusual for you, so many people and so much noise. It was recent, but after some time you became used to the weirdness. You lived in a magnificent apartment, five minutes away from work, which was thankfully paid for by the company.

Everything was going completely fine until the boss invested in the wrong company. When that company went down, the company you were working for also went down, causing your boss to be bankrupted.

That's when your world came crashing down. You lost the apartment you were staying in because it was way too overpriced for you to afford alone, and you didn't even have a place to work. To make things worse, your parents were going through a tough time back in your hometown, and you had sent them the money you had saved, leaving you with just a couple hundred dollars.

You were alone and lost in an enormous city. You had no place to sleep or work. You felt miserable and lost as you cried yourself to sleep for several days, sleeping on some cardboards that the people were throwing away.

You were tired of sleeping on the ground, on the fourth day, you summoned up some unknown energy and went to a public bathroom, where you showered and prepared yourself to find a new job.

You spent all day running around, walking from coffee shop to coffee shop. From one restaurant to another. By seven your body was exhausted. Especially because you didn't eat all day, so you sat down on the road.

Finally the answer to your prayers were heard. An elderly lady saw you miserably sitting down on the dirty ground and helped you walk inside her small restaurant. It smelled of rice cakes and kimchi and you liked it.

The eldery woman’s name was Kim Sohyun and she was eighty years old. But don’t be fooled by her age, she was fast and didn't stop moving. She always found something to do at the restaurant, even when it was as empty as a parking lot at night. Out of genuine kindness, she gave you some food and a place to stay. The apartment you stayed in was from her daughter that left Korea to go abroad and never talked to her mom again.

After that day, you took care of that adorable lady, learned how to cook and even started cleaning for her.

You smiled at the thought of the lady Kim Sohyun. As your mind came back to the present when you read the name of the person that asked you for the design, you got shy. He is a starting rapper by the name of Changbin. He had pretty brown eyes and a cute laugh that made your heart flutter.

When he told you he trusted you with his first album cover design you hugged him tightly, which caught him off guard, but he didn't mind. Not when it came to you. Changbin was around for a while before asking you to work for him. He knew your story, and you knew his.

A sudden loud bang echoed inside your silent apartment shocking you.Then suddenly everything was dark. It took you a while to recognize what happened, but as soon as you noticed that the power went off panic took over your small body.

Your computer is quite old and only works plugged to the electricity. Since the power went off, it means your computer is dead. Tears started to form at the corners of your exhausted eyes... All the work you already had done… Was gone.

The design you had been working on for days was totally gone.

You fell on your knees on the wood floor violently. Your frame curled up in a ball as you sobbed quietly, trying your best not to be too noisy and scare Lady Sohyun that is sleeping.

Now the only sounds audible from the inside were your sobs, and from the outside, the rain that started to calm down.

God, decided to reward you from being loyal and strong and sent someone to save you.

You didn't see it, but it was something so magical and special. There was an angel standing in front of you. His body was muscular and well proportioned, radiating light.

You noticed something was wrong from all the sudden brightness that escaped from between your fingers as you covered your eyes. And just like the curiosity killed the cat, you screamed so loud that you are afraid it woke half of the city.

In front of you, there was an absurd creature. His body was perfectly built, muscles visible on his pale body. His face was so magical that you were afraid that you had died and went to paradise. Golden hair, gloomy eyes, plump crimson lips, and a prominent nose. His frame was only covered by a thin cover that went from his shoulder to his waist, secured by a charming gold belt. His feet bare.

“What-what are you doing here?” You question getting off the wooden floor and taking a few steps back, startled.

“I'm your guardian angel, YN.” The creature explains, his voice low and noble. “Don’t be afraid…I'm here to take care of you.”

You stare at him with burning cheeks and uncertain eyes. Curiosity consuming you alive. You walk towards him slowly. He was so pure and bright, almost unreal. Something heaven-made.

“Can I touch you?” You ask innocently, just to make sure he is real.

“Go ahead, YN-ah.” The angels respond with a genuine smile.

Your fingertips were trembling as you caressed his cheek. The angel flinched because of your cold fingertips, scaring you for a few moments. His skin was silky and he felt genuine. His hair was also soft, but a bit dry and he smelled like nature. The scent was so different that you couldn't explain it. It prompted you with comfort.

“Oh my…” You confessed impressively. “I don’t have money to buy you food, and I don't have a place for you to sleep in… I'm sorry. I think you should go back to… hm… Heaven?” You say, confused. The beautiful angel laughs.

“YN, I don’t need to eat or sleep. I'm here to be your company, help you when you need it, take care of you.” Your mouth opens in a ‘O’ shape and you nod your head. Deep inside, you were still confused and uncertain.

“Hmmm, I think I'm going to sleep now. Could you, hm, not look at me? While I try to fall asleep?” Your cheeks were reddening again. The angel looks at you with love and accepts.

You lay down on your bed and cover your body, hiding completely. Your brain quickly tried to be reasonable and tells you that this was just a dream. Maybe you hit your head and passed out. Too scared to know the truth, you didn’t get out of the covers. As time slowly passed, you silently fell asleep.

It's cute how the next morning you wake up with your blankets almost falling off the bed and an amazing smell of eggs, toasts, and pancakes.

That's odd. Miss. Kim Sohyun never prepared your breakfast before.The weirdest thing was she didn't have these kind of ingredients. As you walked to the small kitchen, yawning and gently rubbing your sleepy eyes, there was a bare back facing you. You screamed, startled.

“Oh, good morning Y/N, did you sleep well?” The man asked, placing a glass of orange juice on the table.

“I thought it was all a dream…” You said to yourself, facing the floor, twisting your hair in annoyance.

“It’s not. I’m here to take care of you…” You stared at him, seriously. That was the first time he made your heart flutter.

After ten awkward minutes of him washing the dishes that were on the sink from yesterday, curiosity took the best of you:

“What's your name, Angel?” You asked, admiring his sturdy back. He laughed silently, then he jerked his head towards you.

“Oh right, how impolite. I forgot to introduce myself. I'm Christopher Bang Chan. I’m a mixture of Korean and Australian. I was moving to Korea when the plane I was in had a problem and crashed. I died there, I was twenty years old. This is why I still look like this and not older.” The last part, he narrated to you while facing the plates he was washing, avoiding your gaze.

“I'm so sorry…” You said in a low voice.

"It 's ok love. Everything happens for a reason…” Christopher says with a tender smile. “Now” He started talking again, finishing up with the plates. “You go to take a shower, and then get ready to work, I’ll clean the kitchen.” You looked at him surprised but did as he said.

“Wait, what will you do all day?” You asked, interested.

“I'll clean your house, try to fix your computer and then pray. Don’t worry about me, ok?” You nodded again, trying to be obedient.

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( 90 Days Left)

As time went by you bought him some ‘human’ clothes, so he looked ordinary and you could walk around with him by your side. Chris, as you like to call him, looked handsome on the outfits you carefully pick him.

The truth was that his presence was now normal to you. Every time you opened your door, you greet the charming Angel, that's usually in the modern kitchen, cooking you dinner. Usually, after dinner, you washed the dishes while you obligated him to sit down and rest for a bit.

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( 80 Days Left)

After a tedious day of work, you ate a delicious dinner and went straight to the bathroom to take a warm shower. When you were done, you sat comfortably on your downy bed while Chris brushed your hair. Usually while he did it, you informed him about your day, and today was no different. As his bony fingers grazed over your scalp trying not to willingly hurt when he was brushing harder, you eagerly told him about Changbin.

“He may seem to be a bit mean at first. He always wears black clothes… his makeup is always perfectly made. I'm jealous sometimes. His voice is nice because he can make it deep and serious or high pitched and girly to piss me off.” You giggled while remembering Binnie’s jokes from that today.

“That man seems important to you…” Chris stated with a gentle smile, even though something sparkled inside him. Could he be jealous of that man for being so close to you?

“Hmmmm, not as important as you.” You say positively and then turn your body so you could confront the timid boy sitting in the middle of your bed.

Chris looked at the white blanket that was resting on his legs as he played with his fingers. Did you just say that? Is he that important to you? The Angel was biting his bottom lip nervously. His heart was racing like crazy and you could almost hear it calling your name.

You moved closer to him, enough so when you extended your arm, your soft hand would cup his cheek. Chan immediately stared at you, trying to understand what were you going to do next.

A voice in your head woke you up and made you pull your hand away, suddenly feeling shy. Maybe Chris can’t feel love for someone, maybe not the same way humans do. And you were afraid of scaring him. An uncomfortable silence involves the both of you and you sign, closing your eyes and trying to calm down the urge to cry.

The truth is he makes you feel some type of way. His eyes seem to light up and turn brighter every time he sees you. Chris would carefully listen to all your complaining or sad words. His lips would turn to an adorable pout when you were bossing him around. His hugs were warm and safe, and you felt protected on them. His laugh was so innocent and contagious and also mentioning he has such a pure heart, filled with love only. The angel made you feel special and loved… You were getting attached to it.

You didn't want to admit it to him or yourself. Maybe you were starting to feel something for him. It was wrong. You and he could never be together, because he was your guardian angel, not your lover.

“I think… I'll go to sleep.” You said after being lost on your melancolic thoughts for too long.

“Oh, hm, ok… But you seem sad. What's wrong?” Chan politely questioned while getting off the comfy bed so you could lay down. Your hands felt unsteady, your stomach was aching in an unusual way.

“Nothing you can fix.” You coldly explained, intentionally trying to push him away. You needed some time alone.

“Oh… Ok. I'll be praying in the kitchen if you require me.” Chris winks at you. “Good Night, Love.” You bite your lip to stop the tears from slipping out. That damn nickname.

You tried to sleep. You did, but your heart was beating too fast and you couldn't stop thinking about his lips. Chris's lips were so plump and inviting, they seemed so soft and plush, so kissable…

Chan peaked at you, and noticed how restless you were, he approached you:

“Y/N, let me try to help you. Please, you don’t need to talk about it. I'll just be there for you.” The Angel insists, sitting by your side on your bed.

“Ok ok… I only accept because it's hard for me to sleep, and I have work tomorrow.” You finally gave in. Chan felt grateful, this was something he wanted for a while and was too shy to ask you.

You lay down on the bed again, closing your eyes and snuggling inside the warm covers. Chris was shy, but it was worth it. Chan lays down on the bed, under the covers and gets closer to you. Uncertain. His arm rested on your waist as he pushed you a little further against his chest.

Chan wanted to cuddle you. You smiled as an adorable blush painted your cheeks. He was warmer than the heavy covers, his embrace so safe and comfortable that you never wanted him to leave.

The Angel was feeling the same, shy but happy. Your body felt so tiny between his protective arms. He desperately wished to hold you forever because, somehow, you felt like home. Chan was scared, afraid of how he was starting to feel for the charming girl he had to look after. He loves to admire the way your smile gets wider when he makes a joke; how you get mad at him when he does everything at home alone and how pretty you look without even trying.

What if he fell for you?

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( 70 Days Left)

“Chris come here…” You whined in the bathroom, your bandana was stuck in your hair and if you tried to pull it, it would most likely rip all your hair off.

The tall man came inside the bathroom in a rush, worried that something may have happened to you.

“What’s wrong, Love?” His melodious voice asked, admiring your grumpy face that reflected on the small, old mirror.

“My hair is tangled, and it hurts if I pull it. Please, help me.” You begged with puppy eyes, noticing how he changed from worried to relaxed in seconds.

The Angel walked behind you, and his slender fingers started to work on your messy hair. You could feel the warmth his body was radiating from behind you. His smell changed, because he was now using your body wash and shampoo. The smell of vanilla was amazing, you liked it in your skin, but when it came to him… It was special.

Chris was shaking, his fingers were uncertain and trembling. His breathing was uneasy and his legs felt like jelly. He could notice easily how you were biting your bottom lip, a cute pink blush on your cheeks and every time his fingers brushed against your sensitive neck, a long breath would leave your sensual lips.

The atmosphere inside the bathroom was starting to heat up, both of you not being able to control their body language and it was obvious. So obvious that both of you were crazy in love with each other.

“Done…” He said, his voice loud but shaky. Chris immediately called himself stupid for showing you that he is feeling flustered, but you just give him a soft smile and turned around, taking your bandana out of his hands and getting out of the bathroom in a rush, trying to calm yourself down.

You walked close to your window and opened it, feeling the cold breeze hitting your face and calming your heated body. Your heart was beating fastly and you were too timid to look Chris in the eyes.

The way he made you feel is not possible, you can’t feel like that. Though his eyes were so pretty, his lips were so inviting and his heart was pure gold… How could you stop yourself from feeling that way? A sudden call for your name made you come back to reality.

You walked to the front door and opened it. The kind woman that gave you a shelter was there, with a light mad expression:

“My oven is a mess, Hun, i didn't want to bother you on a Sunday but i need help with it.” She explained shaking her head in disappointment. “Could you please get downstairs and clean it?” She asked, her voice hopeful.

“Yes, i can do it. Give me just five minutes and i'll be there.” You smiled politely, she took your hands in hers and smiled, secretly, she was very grateful for you.

You got back inside the small place and called for Chris. He showed up with red eyes, like he was crying but he simply smiled at you, while making you sign with his hand for you to go help Miss Sohyun.

You did so, your heart beating fast once again, but this time because you know, something was up with the angel and you know he will never tell you what's wrong.

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( 60 Days Left)

Some days passed by and you and Chris slept in the same bed together every day. Even him, that affirmed he didn't need to sleep, would get lost in your warmth and fall asleep. Cute little snores invading the bedroom and you couldn't stop giggling, from how precious he looked.

As your eyes scanned your window you noticed that outside was dark, despite being 9 am, it was raining. The heavy raindrops were hitting your window in the most deliciously, making you feel lazy. You looked back at Chris one last time and got off the bed, ready to prepare him a surprise for the first time.

At the kitchen you heated some milk and prepared some toasts that you filled with Nutella. You also picked up some grapes, just how you know he liked it. After a couple of minutes, everything was prepared on the table. There was: a candle with no smell lighted; some white napkins; the amazing toasts with Nutella; the grapes were washed and fresh; and the chocolate was already on the milk, turning out to warm chocolate what you know he will love.

You walked back to your bedroom to find him sleeping on his back, his face turned to the left as his hands rested inside his t-shirt, making it rise and show his toned chest. Immediately you blushed but weren't able to take your eyes out of him. You blamed the covers because they were all messy at the bottom of the bed.

“Chris~” You whispered, sitting next to his body on the bed. The angel just shifted a little in his sleep and reached out for you, pulling you by your waist to lay next to him.

You were biting your lip to stop the gasp that almost escaped your lips from the sudden action. The next thing he did was cling to you, one of his legs rested on top of yours and his head moved to rest on your collar bones, giving you access to his scalp easily.

Christopher was adorable, and you couldn't deny it, especially because he was making you feel things, things you couldn't explain. Your fingers started to massage his scalp and that woke him up.

“Keep doing that…” His lips escaped, but it sounded more like a moan. You continued it for a while, feeling him get relaxed under your touch. Softly you felt his fingers make subtle touches on your stomach, making goosebumps take over your body.

“Smells so nice… Did you prepare something?” He asked getting off of you. You pouted, feeling cold without his body there to warm you.

“Oh, yes. I made breakfast! I was almost forgetting about it!” You are the first to get out of the bed, and then grab gently his hand and pull him to the kitchen.

“Woah.” He gasped. “You didn't have to. You know i don't need to eat…” Chris reminded you, laughing awkwardly.

“Oh…” You said embarrassed. “I forgot it…” You looked at the floor, your anxiety eating you alive.

Chris walked silently towards you and, with his slender fingers, pushed your chin up. Causing you face him. Your eyes found his almost immediately and you found yourself blushing because of that simple action. In his mind, he would take you right there, kiss your lips and get rid of this stupid feeling consuming him every time he was close to you.

“What you did was sweet and i appreciate it, Love.” He whispered. “I will eat some because you made them with so much care, ok?” You nodded, too embarrassed to say anything.

Chris always does this, makes you hope he would finally make a move and then, he leaves you hanging.

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( 50 Days Left)

It all started as a good day, the sun was shining brightly outside, besides the cold wind that made your hair a mess. Chris passed out next to you when you woke up, one of his legs still tangled with yours and his nose was close to your ear, making you hear his not-so-cute snores.

You decided to get up without bothering him, you ate something that was in your fridge and wrote him a small letter telling him not to prepare lunch because you weren't going to eat at home.

At work, Changbin was talking to you, and distracting you so much that you didn't notice the new couple that got inside the restaurant. Due to that they got mad for taking so long to take their order.

Of course, the old lady you work for was mad at you, and as a punishment prohibited Bin from coming to the restaurant for one week. You apologized with teary eyes, the guilt swallowing you alive. You stayed the rest of the day hidden inside the kitchen, as the old lady worked as a waitress today.

A cup accidentally slipped from your hand and broke into million pieces as it hit the floor.

She was mad at you again, telling you that she doesn't know what's up with you today, and she couldn't understand why you were so slow today. When she decided it was time to close the restaurant, you noticed it was raining outside.

Since you live just across the street you didn't mind it, but a car passed in front of you when you were sprinting home, making the water on the road hit you and go everywhere making you soaked.

The tears in your eyes were held back by your angriness, but as soon as you saw Chris' angelic face you broke down in tears on the spot. You fell on your knees while hiding your face between your hands.

“What's wrong, my love?” The Angel asked concerned, but you were too busy sobbing to answer him. “You’re soaked, what happened?”

This time you took a glance at him, red and puffy eyes.

“It was a car. As I was waiting to cross the street he passed on the splash on the street and soaked me from head to toe.”

Chris giggled little from your choice of yours but tried to hide his smile so you wouldn't feel bad.

“Come on, let's take a hot bath to make you feel better, alright?” You nodded, tiredly getting off of your knees and walking to your cold bathroom.

Chris started to take care of the water, letting it fill the bathtub as you stripped of your wet clothes.

“When you are done washing your body tell me because I'll be there to wash your hair and give you a light massage on the scalp and shoulders… ok-” He interrupted himself because on his way out of the bathroom he caught you only in your underwear. A blush decorated your face as his curious eyes stared at you shamelessly.

“Could you… hmm… stop… staring?” You awkwardly asked, trying to cover yourself. 

“I'm sorry, you are beautiful. I couldn't contain myself.” He apologized, then shifted his gaze to his hands, too nervous to face you.

When he finally closed the door behind him you relieved a long sign. You got rid of your underwear quickly, and dived inside the warm water. As the sound of the rain outside reflected inside your small bathroom, you cried.

Your body was overwhelmed with so many emotions that you could not explain. Chris noticed your almost inaudible sobs and waited patiently until you calmed done to knock on the wooden door:

“May i come in? To wash your hair for you?” He asked in a low voice.

“Yes, you may.” You answered some minutes after, trying to calm your heartbeat down. 

He was going to be washing your hair, as you stayed naked underwater. Chris gets inside without making any noise and knees down on the floor, in front of the bathtub as you let your back hit the board and force your head back, so he could have access to it.

The angel’s hands were magical and we're making you feel much better. The way he patiently washed your hair almost made you fall asleep on the spot. After your hair was clean, you strained your back and waited for him to pour water on you, so the shampoo would get off.

Chris was feeling something inside him he didn't know he could. He wanted to touch you, feel every inch of you under his fingertips. He wanted to kiss you passionately as his hands roamed over your beautiful body.

He was only facing your back, but he felt his body heat up and something getting weirdly hard on his pants. He had to ignore it? But the moan you left as soon as his fingers came in contact with your scalp once again made him call your name:

“Y/N, please. I can't take it anymore…” You turned off the water and turned around, not caring about him being able to see your chest, that had some shampoo on them.

“Chris, i can't do this either…” You whispered, staring at him in the eyes.

Even though his body was screaming for him to look at your nude chest, he kept eye contact with you as he got closer to you. It was now or never, the perfect moment to kiss you.

Christopher’s lips were softer than you thought, and you wanted to bite them. His heart-shaped lips molded perfectly with yours and complimented them.

They were pressed up against yours on a long peck that made you frustrated. So, tired of it, you grabbed his face between your small hands and forced him stronger against your mouth. Chan seemed to get the message, and his tongue came in contact with your bottom lip, trying to deepen the kiss.

When you finally felt his tongue against yours you moaned shamelessly, to lost in the feeling to care. He felt perfect for you, he felt like he was made for you… Why did you hold back, when you could have been kissing these lovely lips every day, all day?!

Your lips parted because of the absence of oxygen, and the smile that was displayed on his lips made your heart flutter. Something inside you yelled that he may feel the same for you, from more crazy that it seems.

“I'll wait for you in the kitchen, ok Love?” The Angel suddenly asked, getting up. He was trying his hardest to avoid your chest, but it was stronger than him. Chan got a glimpse of them as he closed the door, but it was enough to make the situation even harder for him.

What both of you didn't know is that what is given, can be taken back as well. Since the both of you committed a sin, The Gifter couldn't be more sure that he had to make the angel stay away from you as soon as possible.

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A/N: Hello beautiful Stars! I know it's been a while, but I am back. Since I'm starting all over again, I decided to make a special first post. This fic was resting in my drafts all year, unfinished.

I finally finished it and I'm very happy for finally posting it. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I loved to write it.

Before I go, I need to give a special thanks to @xiaojunssmile for helping me revising my work. I appreciate you a lot, you are the best. I love you ❤

Rebloggs, likes and comments are always appreciate it. Thank you.

Happy 2021. I hope your new year comes with Heath and lots of love ❤✨