been getting back into an old childhood comic/movie/game. Scott Pilgrim vs. The World. Sadly, my Cod Zombie fixation is still on and a comfort, but it's good to go look back on things and enjoy as myself now and see how I like them now
Thinking a LOT about how upset “evil clowns” make Grim!
Like! Grim was born in 1908, he was a vaudeville performer, he loved clowns when he was alive! And when he woke up from his 80 year sleep, made of things that could never be human but became human anyway because of how fiercely he loved them, he had so much trouble figuring out how his face worked, how his body worked, how to speak or express himself.
But clowns! He couldn’t smile at first, but by god, he could draw a smiling clown on his face and let his family know he loved them and appreciated how they helped him! He could give himself big blue tears down his cheeks and let them know he needed gentleness and hugs and help! He could give himself a face that makes other people smile, and that’s all he wanted, that’s all he ever wanted, was to make people happy and make them happy enough to love him, make them happy enough not to abandon him like everyone always did
Clowns are nice! Clowns are lovely! Clowns are for cheering people up, and self-expression, and being colorful and bright and the center of attention! Clowns are for making children happy, and for being safe for children, and for anyone who needs safety! Grim loves clowns so much that as soon as he was given the chance he reordered his entire life just to be a clown and give other people that happiness! Grim loves clowns so much that his entire family has come together to give him this, because he wants so badly to be a comfort and delight to other people and he can’t do it alone!
Evil clowns are such a betrayal to Grim. They take something soft and lovely and comforting and use that comfort to trick people into letting their guards down just enough to be hurt by them. And now the evil, scary clown is what people expect! It’s what they think of first, when they think of clowns! The first time he came out in full makeup and some child shrieked with terror at the sight - not because he was doing anything scary at all, but because he was a clown - Grim was hurt, but he thought maybe it was a fluke. Some people are scared of clowns, sure, the way some people are scared of creatures or strangers. But it happened again, and again. Actually finding out about Pennywise, or Wrinkles the Clown, or Killer Klowns from Outer Space made Grim cry so hard he literally turned into a puddle in his bathtub and he had to be coaxed into having a physical shape by his mom and uncle. He just doesn’t understand! He doesn’t understand why anybody would do that and it hurts his heart!
that one point about the clown's smile remaining no matter whats going on around them or happening to them resonated with how my body forces me to smile or laugh in uncomfortable situations even when i don't want to and also masking in social situations
How do you guys think about your f/os without being interrupted with intrusive thoughts? I honestly can't daydream about my f/os without scenarios always ending up really really sad or terrifying. Like I want to think about nice and positive things but it's very hard. I always end up being in pain or crying from all the horrible images in my head
Idk a friend mentioned that it looks like a movie and that's so real, it's giving "The lakes", it's giving "My tears ricochet", it's giving Evelyn Hugo, it's giving 1989 older sister idk
But as a folklore evermore girly I just KNOWW this is gonna be my new personality
It’s all about “short kings” how about Short clowns huh??? We honk while we getting stomp on and THOSE MEAN INDIVIDUALS PUT THE STRAWBERRIES ON TOP SHELF?
Foul upon your soul, nothing but wet ear drums and dry eyes for you
You know what I relized...we don't get enough victis crew up this joint, or even any other crew that isn't the mobsters.
Don't get me wrong. I love my Primis and Ultimis crew and the mobsters...But I want my funny crew that has 2 badass characters. I want my crew that murder someone. I want my daddy issues trying to find her fathers secret crew.
As they say...If it doesn't exist, do it yourself. *cracks knuckles before literally falling onto the floor due to lack of motivation*