#cos i NEED to plan out an essay thoroughly otherwise i cant organise my thoughts well enough
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The executive dysfunction is going hard today 😔
#vent tw#I NEED TO WRITE TWO ESSAYS IVE LITERALLY ALREADY HAD 4 WEEKS TO DO IT#i have only just finished gathering the quotes for one of them#i havent even properly planned it out#cos i NEED to plan out an essay thoroughly otherwise i cant organise my thoughts well enough#uGGGHHH#brain static#i mean i dont NEED to plan it out#like in timed essays i just fuckin go for it cos i know i have to and its okay if its not perfects#but when i dont have that time constrait and anxiety its like brain no work#AHHHGGGGHGJGH#i should probably go to the library cos then i'll be in an environment i can better concentrate in#cos IK being in bed is not helping#but im tired and the library is 30 mins away#which yeah yeah isnt a lot but#the whole process of getting dressed. probably making a lunch to take with me. putting myself in the mindset to do that and go out.#then id have to walk back afterwards when im already rlly tired#sorry this is such a small task but it takes energy i dont have#and i either switch between being incredibly impulsive when i want to go out#or needing to plan it out and take time to accept them as my plans#and currently im on that second option#also i have sensory issues surrounding clothing#like idk im fine wearing different clothing outside most of the time?? but at home i cannot wear anything other than certain trousers#which are old and the colours faded and not outside trousers#and like idk i cant relax in other clothes#which i think is only a problem cos im okay with not being relaxed in public i am literally never relaxed#so thats just an added thing i dont notice as much#but if im at home where i want to relax then i cant wear certain clothes cos it feels unbearable#and rubs against my skin wrong like my skins crawling#my point being like.. i dont want to get dressed if i end up not even going out :///
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