#cougar (jaune arc x kali belladonna)

[arc-misadventures]

BMI Jaune: Willow, Summer, and Kali?

BMI: Jaune II

Juniper: Jaune~!

Jaune: No...

Juniper: What?

Jaune: No. Whatever it is, the answer is: No.

Juniper: But, I never said anything?

Jaune: But, you're going to ask me something, and whatever the ask is about, the answer is: No.

Juniper: ...

Juniper: BMI...

Jaune: AHHHH?! Not this shit again!

Juniper: Your chose for this BMI, are Willow Schnee.

Willow: Hello, Jaune~!

Jaune: Hi...?

Juniper: Kali Belladonna.

Kali: Oh look, it's my favourite human~!

Jaune: Why did you say it like that...?

Juniper: And, lastly we have, Summer Rose.

Summer: Hello, Daddy~!

Jaune: Excuse me, what...?

Juniper: Are you ready to choose who you going to, BMI, Jaune~?

Jaune: The hell are you making me choose between my friend’s mom?!

Juniper: Well, as one woman/mother to another, they told me about their... pitiful sex lives, or lack there of in some cases...

Summer: Juniper?!

Kali: How could you just say that?!

Willow: Considering my ex-husband size or, more accurately the lack there of... Honestly, there isn't much to brag about. There is certainly plenty to complain about however…

Juniper: What? Both of your husbands are dead, so you haven't had much, if any action since they died.

Kalli: Well, that's true...

Summer: It's not like we did it much after I had, Ruby...

Juniper: And, Willow... I'm sorry you had to go through that so often...

Willow: While, I love my children with all my heart, and I wouldn't trade them for the world. I do sometimes find myself wishing I had my son sooner so I didn't have to have... relations as often as I did.

Juniper: See! They have sad sexless lives since they lost their husbands. And, Willow had...

Juniper: She had, Jacques...

Juniper: So, Jaune please, BMI these three woman, and help them ‘fix’ their dry spell?

Jaune: ...

SKW: Please~?

Jaune: ...

Jaune: Haaaa...

Jaune: I would Marry, Summer.

Summer: And, why do you want to do that, Husband Dearest~?

Jaune: 'Husband dearest?"

Jaune: Okay? Okay, I say that because you look like you would be a wonderful housewife to come home to.

Summer: Naww~!

Jaune: Plus you look like the woman/wife who would do the, "Hi honey, welcome home! Would like a bath, dinner, or me?" Type of woman, and I...? Ahem... yeah that...

Summer: Oh; Is that so~?

Jaune: ...

Jaune: I Would, Breed Kali.

Kali: Why?

Jaune: Well... You have large birthing hips... and I want to give those birthing hips a run for their money...

Kali: Oh, I hope feel like we're going to enjoy that~!

Jaune: Hahaha...

Jaune: I would impregnate, Willow.

Willow: Oh, why would you do that?

Jaune: ...

Jaune: I hate you ex-husband with a burning passion. A lot of people think that killing him, or torturing him to death would be the best sort of revenge for what he did. But, I think... taking his woman, and making her mine is a much more tantalizing idea~!

Willow: Y-Yours?

Jaune: I’ll make you my woman! By the time I’m through with you, you’ll fit around me perfectly, no other man will satisfy you, you’ll come begging for more, and I’ll be all to happy to oblige~!

Willow: Y-Y-You promise…?

Jaune: Uhh… Well… T-That is of we… did do it…

Summer: Do you think he could do that?

Kali: Maybe? My daughter did say he’s quite big.

Willow: How big?

Kali: Six when soft, ten when hard, and plenty thick as well~!

Willow: Heavens, say it is so~!

Summer: Are you really that big~?

Jaune: WHAT?! How the hell do you know that?!

Willow: He is~!

Summer: Hmm… Juniper, please be a dear, and leave.

Juniper: Why?

Summer: Because, the sooner you leave, the sooner you’ll have grandchildren~!

Juniper: Good luck, Jaune! Remember to not use a condom!

Jaune: W-W-What?! Wait… hold on!

Kali: Don run, Jaune: The fun is about to begin~!

Willow: Come on, Jaune… it’s time to continue the, Arc bloodline~!

Summer: So what will it be, Jaune; Will you take, Kali, or do you want, Willow, or perhaps me~?

Jaune: Ohhh…?!

Jaune: P-Please be gentle…?

SKW: Fu-fufu~!

Kali: No promises~!

[howlingday]

How Society Views MILF Relationships...

Jaune: I am an immature, 20-something year-old man-child, and due to my low confidence, am unable to properly date a woman my own age. I am in this relationship purely for the sex and bragging rights, and maybe some cash to fuel my childish hobbies.

Kali: I am a recently divorced or widowed 40-something year-old cougar seeking a sexual thrill to satisfy my own self-esteem with no regard for my child who is likely the same age as the man I am sleeping with. My relationship is solely for the purpose of self-indulgence and will likely die out when either of us become bored of the other in one to two years.

How the relationship actually works...

Jaune: (Dancing w/ Kali)

Kali: (Watching her favorite show w/ Jaune)

Jaune: (Kisses goodnight, Sleeps)

Kali: (Wakes up, Nudges Jaune awake)

Jaune: (Being a good husband)

Kali: (Being a loving wife)

Jaune: (Happy)

Kali: (Happy)

[brokentrafficknight]

A new chibi for Kali and a very new chibi for Ghira!

[therealmofamorus]

“I-I am Kali of the Belladonna and Khan Clan, Chieftain of the United State of Tribal Clans and Ambassador of the Kingdom of Mistrial submit to the One True Lord of Menagerie and Mistrial. All hail His Supremacy, Jaune Luna Emperor, Emperor of Arcadia Empire, Inheritor of the Pool of Darkness, the Lord of the Grimland and Overlord of the Dark Tower!”

Former Chieftain Kali Belladonna née Khan after her enslavement to the Dark Lord of Remnant.

[arc-misadventures]

Catgirl Supremacy

Kali:

Jaune: …

Jaune: I like this view…

[arc-misadventures]

The Bellabooty~!

Jaune’s reaction to, The Bellabooty~!

Blake’s response:”Too Hard!”

Kali’s response: “Harder~!”

[arc-misadventures]

The Biker Chick

Jaune: I got myself a motorbike!

Kali: A motorbike? I remember when I had one, cruising through the city. Tearing up the streets. Ahh... that was the life.

Jaune: You were a biker?

Kali: No, I was a bonafide biker babe. See, this is a photo from when I was a biker babe.

Jaune: ...

Kali: What do you think?

Jaune: Do you still have that outfit?

Kali: I think so; Why do you ask.

Jaune: I need to ride my biker babe before I ride my bike.

Kali: Oh~? I better warn you, I'm a hard bike to ride~!

Jaune: I wouldn't have it any other way~!

[arc-misadventures]

Baby Making

Blake: You ready to make a baby, Jaune!

Jaune: Hell yeah I am! Just let me get the condoms first.

Blake: Jaune?! You can be serious?!

Jaune: Hmm…? Oh, yeah… That kinda of defeats the purpose of doing this. Sorry…

Blake: At least you caught yourself.

Jaune: Yeah, I forgot to use one the last time I had sex. For a second there I didn’t want to repeat that mistake again. Your mother didn’t seem to mind it though… Now then, lets make a baby!

Blake: Yeah! Let’s… Wait…? HOLD ON NOW?!!

[arc-misadventures]

Single?

Kali: So, Blake… about your human friend, Jaune?

Blake: Yeah, what about him?

Kali: Is he single?

Blake: Nani?