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#crying weeping i love this scene so much
gendervapor14 · 1 year
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01746 birthday bash ~ day five ~ chapter 50: hopeless
content warnings: heavy angst, alcoholism word count: 577 words brief summary: my take on my favorite scene in law's backstory: rosinante breaking down in tears the night before he becomes just "cora".
happy birthday 01746. my sweet little fucked up story. i can't believe i created you. ♥
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Crickets droned on. Law snored softly. Every page was a blur. The sea, the sky, it was all merging together.
Ten hospitals. Six months. All of it, equivalent to nothing.
The fire before him was crackling low, on its way to self-extinguishing. Still hot enough to render paper to ash, little orange worms of hot ember dancing along tattered edges. Lazily, his hand rustled around within the roomy pockets of his coat for any pages left behind. He hardly skimmed them before tossing them in.
“Enemy.” burned quickly. Of course the World Government tainted hospitals. I can’t believe how desperate they are.
“We needed a better plan.” was gobbled up eagerly by hungry flame. So inclined to cover up their own horrible misdeeds, they purposely miseducated trained professionals. People who are trusted with life itself.
“Marines.” fluttered into the fire.  I’ll never wear that justice coat again.
With a defeated belch, Rosinante stared at the sleeping snail planted on top of a stack of sea charts. Receiver firm in hand, anyway. “I wouldn’t pick up if I were you, either. I promised I wasn’t going to do anything stupid.” He mumbled, “Then I quit my mission for half a year. Never called, never looked for you.”
For a moment, he waited for a reply that would never come. Hung his head and let his heavy eyelids flutter shut. “I did exactly what I said I wouldn’t do anymore. I disappeared.”
The receiver hit the dirt without a sound. His hands fisted around the book of sea charts in his lap. His brother’s beloved sea charts. The solution, he thought, the diamond in the rough. He tore out a handful of pages and whipped them over the cliff’s edge, towards the sea. Ancient maps tore and fluttered in the wind until they clung to the surface of the water. Slowly breaking down, deteriorating.
And then, he downed the rest of that sweet bottle of white wine. The bottle he saved for months now, the cure bottle. The celebration bottle. Tasted bitter as hell.
What the hell am I doing…? I’m completely isolated now, forcing this poor kid to relive his horrible childhood, over and over again. I might as well have crucified him outside a church and lit a match. He stared at the blurring waves, legs folded up, moonlight turning dark feathers a glistening violet. His sickness is only getting worse. It’s not even the will of D driving me anymore. I don’t care about that anymore. I’m not sure I ever did.
When he dies, then what, Rosinante? What purpose do you have? You’ve turned your back on your family, blood and otherwise. There’s nothing left.
An aftershock of rage coursed through him. He swayed up to his feet, shoulders trembling. Threw the empty bottle against the rocky surface, hard, internally delighted with the sprinkle of glass, the shattering echo. The heat prickled then, sparked up from his sternum, clogged his throat, his nose. His eyes. I just…I feel so sorry for this damn kid. He’s got Flevance under his skin, his family’s death in his eyes, and my brother’s wretched strings tangled around every limb. He needs help, but it just seems so impossible…and if I give up…if I do nothing…he’s going to become just as miserably dangerous as Doflamingo. But what am I supposed to do? Love didn’t save Sengoku, Tsuru, or Sora from my stupidity. Love won't save Law from White Lead Disease.
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read the full story here ♥
previous entry here!
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theravenlyn-art · 10 months
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she was like an angel to me
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skullsandcorals · 9 months
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How I've Been Feeling About Aryan's Grover:
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shield-and-saber · 1 month
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yeah, so i just finished cataclysm
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#spoilers in tags#do not read unless you've already gone thru phase 2#the high republic liveblogging#the high republic spoilers#cataclysm#i am....... in agony#i spent pretty much the entire last 20 pages crying#I THOUGHT I WAS HEARTBROKEN WHEN AIDA ACTUALLY DIED. SO IMAGINE MY PAIN WHEN THE LAST LINE TO REFERENCE HER SAYS#''[ENYA ZIRI AND PHAN-TU'S LAUGHTER] ECHOED THROUGH THE TEMPLE HALLS AND MADE THE OTHER JEDI SMILE BECAUSE IT SOUNDED LIKE AIDA'S LAUGHTER'#SHUT THE FUCK UP#SHUT UP#WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME#THE FIRST THING CREIGHTON DID WHEN HE WOKE UP WAS TRY TO FIND HER#I'M DISINTEGRATING AS WE SPEAK#WHAT THE FUCK#CREIGHTON TAKES ON ENYA???? THEY'RE GONNA HELP EACH OTHER THRU THEIR GRIEF??? HE BEFRIENDED THE MED DROID?????????#the entire funeral for the 3 fallen jedi had me fucking sobbing btw i was a mess#also. wasn't expecting this but axel's redemption did end up winning me over. i was so sure i would continue to hate him#he's very much in love w/ gella and that means i love him very much as well#cataclysm also keeps up a 2/2 record that it shares w/ convergence by way of:#gella nattai says a deeply profound and spiritually moving/comforting line in each book and it hits me right in my religious trauma#the whole 2nd half of the book was incredible. i quite literally spent about 7 hours reading it as fast as i possibly could#i'm not the biggest fan of certain parts of kang's writing but her strength ABSOLUTELY lies in describing battle scenes#those were the easiest to read battle sequences i've ever read in my life and that's out of the entire phase 2 + other prequel books#i think the only other book whose combat didn't confuse me was the 1st republic commando but it's been long enough that i'm not sure#chancellor greylark is so interesting i'm obsessed and also the end scenes w/ her and axel had me weeping like a babe#anyways. that's all for now#my posts
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murdermeadow · 11 months
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THE WAY TAION ACTS DURING THE PRISON SCENE MAKES ME SO SO SAD IT'S UNBELIEVABLE
CUZ LIKE
MY POOR BOY !!!!! he gets so so SO frustrated and upset and snarky because he is very rapidly losing hope and the whole ordeal is INCREDIBLY stressful for him because it directly ties into everything he fears !!!!!! he's so scared of the people he loves DYING and having NO CONTROL OVER IT so this entire period of time is PURE PSYCHOLOGICAL TORTURE as he watches his friends weep and suffer and he can't do shit about it !!!! jackshit !!!!! his mondo are disabled, his communication is null, all while the person he's been trying to protect and keep happy the most is stuck AWAY FROM HIM. and he can't! do! anything! so he sits there rotting!!!! rotting and decaying and crying and weeping and slamming his fists against the wall because HE CAN'T TAKE IT !!!!!! THIS IS HIS WORST NIGHTMARE MADE REAL !!!!! so it makes complete sense as to why he's so agitated and sarcastic !!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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errorkey · 2 years
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hey . hey!! guess who’s RUINED after ep10 !!!!
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turnaboutchaos · 2 years
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hi fellas i jst finished DGS2 i am. going to sit on the floor for a while
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tvrningout-a · 1 year
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CHAPTER SELECT       ➤ ???       ➤ ???       ➤ is it not enough i'm happy? 
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i made the team! i get to play! i get to be their setter!
     how brightly she shined as she told her parents of her success, of how she worked hard for months to obtain that starting position, of the excitement she finally felt again. they were happy -- why wouldn’t they be? for years, makiko hadn’t touched an extracurricular, nor had she dedicated herself to anything worthwhile. they were relieved to see her smile, to hear her talk so animatedly about something.
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     but makiko had been naïve. they always want more from her. 
     oh, won’t it be nice if you’re captain next year? her mother mentions it more than once, likes to talk about how yuuta was the basketball captain his senior year, and makiko tries to smile and move on. she doesn’t care if she becomes captain or not, doesn’t believe it’s something to entertain when she’s still building trust with her new teammates. she just wants her team to do well, to enjoy themselves and feel good about what they’re doing. what does it matter if she’s the one leading in the end?
     her father thinks her coach is too easy on her and her teammates, mistakes allowing the girls’ room to learn and trust each other as a lack of initiative. never mind they’ve won every game up until now -- that coach rubs him the wrong way, and maybe he’ll have a talk with her. makiko knows this comes from a place of love, that he only wants the best for her, but she can’t help the scowl and harsh protest that leaves her mouth. he scolds her for talking to him that way and tells her she won’t succeed if she doesn’t have someone to push her.
     makiko shuts up, apologizes, and clenches her fists so tightly that her palms sting. 
they push their own sense of ambition onto her, yet they don’t believe she can do this on her own? that she can’t be like her siblings like they’ve always wanted her to be unless someone holds her hand? what a fucking joke.
     her mother brings up becoming captain again one night, and makiko just cannot take it anymore.
     “ is it not enough i’m having fun? ”
     quiet but sharp, makiko’s words halt the conversation at the dinner table. she feels yuki’s stunned gaze, but she doesn’t look away from her plate. mrs. furukawa asks, “ what? ”
     " is it not enough i’m having fun? is it not enough i’m happy? ”
     “ makiko--- ” 
     “ no, tell me! is it more important that i’m successful, or more important that i’m happy? ”
     it comes pouring out, every ounce of resentment makiko has ever felt for being compared to her siblings, for being taught that unless she was the best, she wasn’t good enough. it’s reflected in her eyes as she glowers at her mother, shoulders tense and one hand clutching her chopsticks with a death grip.
     “ where is this coming from? ” her father has the nerve to look confused, and makiko scoffs.
     “ how many times have you compared me to yuki and yuuta now? a hundred times, a thousand? it isn’t a crime to lack ambition, dad! ”
     " we just want you to be successful, makiko, ” her mother interjects, sounding stern despite her glassy eyes. “ your siblings never needed us to push them much, but you... ”
     “ i don’t need you to push me. you pushing me has only ever made me feel inadequate, you know that? you put my siblings on this pedestal and expected me to match that -- of course i stopped trying! ”
     chest heaving, heart racing, head spinning --- when did she stand? she’s trembling, she realizes, and she can’t seem to get her breathing under control. yuki reaches out to her, but makiko recoils ( don’t touch me or i’ll break ) . it seems her parents are stunned into silence, though makiko doesn’t take the time to look at them. she doesn’t see the guilt as it sinks in what they’ve done to her. no, she has an overwhelming need to get away, far away, and rushes from the dining room and out the front door. she can’t be sure who it is screaming after her. her mind can’t focus on anything else but being anywhere but here.
     she’s done. this is the last time she runs away from a problem. in a few hours, makiko will come home, sit down, and talk to her parents. but she needs this right now, a small reprieve after finally finding her voice and exhausting it.
     as makiko collapses against a tree ( of course she finds herself at the community center, where it all began ) , she makes herself a promise: she won’t ever be that timid, shell of a girl again.
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llycaons · 3 months
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can someone help me. what is this thing. why was lestat making finger movements on a piece of old wood. I can't believe he was actually practicing. he'd need an actual piano to do that. do we know what was happening here
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grimesthinker · 1 year
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Stepdad!rick having a bunch of friends over for a poker night or something and you come downstairs to get some water and popcorn, wearing the tiniest, tightest pyjamas he’s ever seen. And ur unaware of the several wandering eyes cause you’re way too busy with your nose in a book, standing by the microwave. And Rick has to excuse himself for a moment to tell you to get back upstairs before he loses it and fucks you in front of his friends…
the stepdad!rick spam is EVERYTHING. i audibly squealed. i am in love with you.
you come down the stairs into the kitchen, a cherry lollipop stuck in your mouth and a book in hand. you take the candy from your mouth and smile sweetly to the group of men sitting around the kitchen table, stacks of cards and half empty beer bottles littering the scene.
"hi, daddy!" you greet rick with a kiss to his cheek. you think nothing of it. you're just being polite, after all. you skip to the cabinet and stand on your toes to reach the box of popcorn tucked inside. rick works his jaw as both your thin tank top and tiny pajama shorts ride up, exposing much of your skin. he tenses, gripping the beer bottle in his hand a bit too hard.
he loudly clears his throat when his friends' eyes linger on you for too long. your pretty bare skin, the way you suck on the lollipop as you put the bag of popcorn in the microwave. the men quickly go back to their card game, not wanting to displease rick anymore. you don't notice it. you bend over the counter and put your nose back into the book, reading while you wait for the popcorn to finish popping.
as rick watches you bend over the counter like that, lips sucking on the lollipop and eyes moving along the pages, he can't take it anymore. he gruffly excuses himself from the card game and treads to you, back to his friends so he can block their view as he admonishes you.
"what the hell do you think you're doing?" he asks, voice in a scolding whisper. you place the book on the counter and look up at him, head cocking to the side in confusion.
your voice is sweet. innocent. what a little actress, he thinks. "i don't know what you-"
"upstairs, now."
your eyebrows furrow in confusion and your bottom lip becomes wobbly. "but i-"
"now."
you know he means it. you do as he says, pouting and stomping up the stairs to your room. he excuses himself again and follows you, shutting the door and locking it behind him.
minutes later, your pajama shorts and panties are thrown to the ground, thighs pushed to your chest. you weep as his cock thrusts into your slick cunt, deeper and deeper. "m'sorry! was jus' being nice!" you cry, eyes teary and swollen lips pouty.
what a sight it was. you, the picture perfect embodiment of innocence, taking your step father's cock on your pretty pink bed while his friends wait downstairs. you whine and cling to him, moaning when his cock brushes against your g spot.
"open." he ignores your apologies and holds your jaw with his big hand, spitting on your tongue when you stick it out like the good girl you are.
he gives a slight nod so you can swallow, eyelashes fluttering up at him. your eyes are glossy, hands grabbing for him. he knows what you want. he always knows. he dips his head down to connect your lips. you mewl as he messily kisses you, nipping at your bottom lip. "fuckin' brat."
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Made it out alive, just for you
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Gojo x gn!reader , angst to fluff, hurt/comfort
Au where gojo lives
Warning: y/n has a nightmare about gojo, MAJOR JJK MANGA SPOILERS FOR CH 236, so ya it involves blood and a lil bit of gore, and crying.
A/n: i love this man so so much, and whenever I get a bad dream about my loved ones dying, it mostly includes the part after their death and I'm living without them, and when I wake up it's such a relief, so this fic is based on that
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'i miss you so much toru'
the scene never left your head, the love of your life, now lifeless, laid on the ground, wounded and dying after the fight with sukuna
you cried all day, the next day and the next. You couldn't let go of him, and how could you? Satoru was the shining sun in your life. He had the brightest smile, the prettiest baby blue eyes, the strongest will and his love for you was endless. You loved him so so much.
Coming home everyday from work pained you. You would forget that he wasn't here anymore, you would buy mochi on the way home, only to come home and realize he was never coming back, the reality settling in as you cried once more.
'please come back toru, i can't do this without you'
you eat dinner alone again, hugging the adorable custom made plushie of satoru. It was a gift from him. He lovingly said that day, that the plushie would keep you company when he was not with you.
The memory of gojo cut and bloodied plagued your mind and you hugged the plushie tighter
'you are bigger than the whole sky toru, the strongest and bravest of them all. Wherever you are, I hope you rest well. Watch over me, my love'
And then your eyes opened.
You sat up on the bed quickly, looking around everywhere and breathing heavily, just trying to ground yourself into reality.
It was just a dream. A bad one, but just a dream. You're fully awake by now.
"breathe for me sweetheart"
"T-toru?"
He was right there, your beautiful satoru, gently hugging your shaking body close to him.
"whatever you saw, it wasn't real. I'm here now baby"
You nod. Your mind was a mess. You barely remember what you saw, but it left you feeling terrified.
"Hang in there, I'll get you some water"
He slowly left your shared bedroom and you watched the white tuft of hair disappear into the kitchen. Waking up after countless bad dreams and nightmares was unfortunately common for the both of you, after the fight with sukuna in shibuya.
Right. Gojo defeated sukuna. He won. And he made it out alive.
Your eyes landed upon the custom plushie across the room that gojo gifted you all those years ago
The same one from your dream.
The dam broke. A quiet whimper left your lips as memories of the dream flashed through your mind's eye and by the time satoru returned, you were curled up on your side of the bed, sniffling and weeping.
You heard him place the glass of water on the nightstand, and in the next second he's got you enveloped in his warm arms, gently rubbing your back.
"I-I saw you die toru..I had to live without you and I had to c-come home and you weren't there, a-and you were never coming back" You were sobbing and crying as you hugged him, both from the unsettling dream, and the relief that it wasn't real. You were so, so relieved to be awake, to find your one and only alive and well. Satoru continued to whisper sweet nothings and comforting words into your ears and never once did he loosen up his hold on your trembling frame.
"its okay baby, i know how you feel, and i love you so much, and I'm right here" His sweet and gentle tone combined with his comforting voice made you cry even harder. You didn't know where the tears were coming from.
"i know toru, i know you won, it's just that ever since I saw you like that..." You take a deep breath in and gaze into his beautiful blue orbs that you love. "Just one wrong move, and you would have been gone and i-i don't know what I would do without you being there with me."
Satoru's own eyes welled up with tears because he couldn't bear to see you cry. He cupped your face in his arms, a relieved sigh leaving his lips as he saw you closing your eyes and leaning into his touch.
"you are my whole world y/n" His voice wasn't louder than a whisper. Satoru wiped your tears with the pads of his fingers, and kissed your forehead. "That day, I was thinking about you the whole time. I knew I had to come back to you, and I did." A single tear drop trailed down his face and he stroked your head to comfort you. " You don't have to worry anymore, my love. It's all over, and I'm here right here, right now. " You looked at him, reassured and he could feel his heart swell as he looked at his world, his universe, right there in his hands. "Thankyou satoru" He smiled, and you did too.
Satoru leant in and kissed you ever so slowly, reminding you that he was right there with you, alive. You both smiled into the kiss, knowing that you love each other with every fiber of your being and most importantly,
You were right there with each other; physically, and in each other's hearts.
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shrimparted · 11 months
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY R- what the hell do you mean I’m two days late
[ID: A Mob Psycho 100 comic set post-canon. Mob, depicted with chin-length hair and wearing a skirt, says to Ritsu, "I just haven't been able to think of a gift he'd actually like. And I want it to be special, cause this time he'll expect the party."
She looks down with a frown. "Especially since Teru accidentally added him to the group chat." Ritsu laughs with a "Hah!" and says, "I do have an idea, if you want to hear it." Mob smiles tiredly and says, "Please." Ritsu says, "Okay, but it's a pretty big gift so we should check in with everyone."
Teru, shown with hair past his shoulders, exclaims happily, "Yes!! I think he would love that!" Tome grins and says, "Oh my gosh, yess! Maybe we'll actually see him cry this time, hah!" Shou looks interested and says, "Oh for sure! I actually know a place we can find one!" Serizawa smiles, "I'm pretty sure his new lease allows pets!" Dimple squints and says, "… How do you know that," and Serizawa says, "How about we stop talking for a little while."
Next, marked "a few days later:", we see Reigen opening the door to Spirits and Such. The door creaks open, and he screams with terror when people loudly go, "Happy birthday!" We see scenes of the party: Reigen sweating and grimacing as Tome offers a cake with Ritsu laughing in the background, Serizawa and Reigen smiling fondly at each other with a heart floating between them, and Reigen looking dead-eyed as everyone photographs him and his cake-covered face.
Reigen, now cleaned of cake, flops on the couch and smiles, "Wow! All that's missing now is a present!" He sweatdrops. "… I can feel you all staring. Then he exclaims "Oh!" at the sight of all the kids looking happy and excited. Mob is in the center, smiling with anticipation and holding a box about the size of a large shoebox.
Reigen takes it with a fond smile, saying, "Aw, kids… I was joking but this is really--" He breaks off with a shocked sound as something shifts within the box. He holds the box away from himself and says flatly, "Is this a prank--" but is cut off by a laughing Tome shouting, "Just open it already!!!"
Reigen, frowning, exclaims, "No way! I'm not falling--" As he speaks, a canine nose pokes out from the boxes lid, and his expression turns to shock. "-- for that?"
We see a small puppy excitedly wagging its tail from within the box. The kids all talk. Teru: "Surprise!!~" Shou: "It should be a Shiba but since it's a rescue it's probably not pure bred." Mob, nervous: "… Do you like it?" Tome: "Who cares!! It's adorable!!"
Reigen stares down with silent shock. Making a hiccuping noise, he looks at everyone with an overwhelmed expression that moves to tears as he picks up the dog, making wordless wavering noises as he does.
The puppy licks Reigen's cheeks, and Reigen scrunches up his face as he tries not to cry. The kids exclaim: Ritsu, grinning: "Oh my god." Teru: "Awww." Tome, surprised: "Holy shit, he's speechless!" Mob, happy: "So you like it?"
Reigen sniffs loudly and says, "You guys…" Everyone looks at him eagerly. Once again crying, Reigen says, "Get out of my office." The kids looks surprised, and Serizawa sweats and wryly raises his hands, saying "Reigen--" Reigen cuts him off by shouting so hard he motion blurs. "I said-- get out." His shout is also blurred, and it's bold and in large font.
The final page shows Reigen lying down and blubbering while holding the puppy, who keeps wagging its tail. Narration says, "After everyone left, Reigen proceeded to weep in the privacy of the Spirits and Such office." Ritsu is shown facing away fromt he camera, arms crossed behind his back as he mutters, "Man." Narration says, "Ritsu was blamed for the whole ordeal even though for once he was trying to do something genuinely kind for Reigen, even if it was just for Mobs sake." End ID]
ID by @princess-of-purple-prose thank you so much!
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invisible-lint · 4 months
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Before and After: Nightmares
Lucien x Archeron!Reader
Summary: the first in a series of drabbles before and after you went into the cauldron
Warnings: angst. angstier than I intended oops
Word Count: 1.2K
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You grab a knife off a fae distracted by what Amarantha is doing to your twin. You are not one of them. She can't stop you. You may not be able to kill her, but you will not let Feyre go down alone. You stalk forward, ready to try, prepared to die with her, when warm arms circle around your body. "Don't," Lucien whispers. Your gasp of indignation shifts to a scream of rage and horror when Feyre's neck snaps, the cruel fae queen finally done torturing her. You scream, not noticing as the masks fall off the faces of the spring court fae. You scream and scream, thrashing against him, trying to get loose, the knife still gripped in your hand as Lucien holds you. You scream until your throat is raw and you can't scream anymore. And then suddenly through some miracle performed by the high lords, she's alive again. Changed. Fae. But alive. And you sob, your body going limp, the knife clattering to the stone floor. You sob and Lucien continues to hold you.
You’re not sure what it was that woke you, the air, suddenly cold from the blankets being thrown back, or Lucien calling your name. You swing at him wildly, perceiving him as a threat in your sleep-addled terror. He grabs your hand, holding it until you’re awake enough for clarity to come across your features. He crawls into bed with you, pulling you into his arms as you start crying. He presses soft kisses to the top of your head, whispering reassurances into your hair, his hand against the small of your back. He holds you like this, waiting for you to be ready to tell him what this nightmare had been about. You had them more often than not. Sometimes, about your own experiences Under the Mountain, but more often, you relived Feyre’s death. Terrified by how powerless you were to stop it, how utterly powerless you would be to prevent anything else from happening to her.  Lucien just holds you, knowing that you’ll tell him what it was about when you’re ready. 
“I was back Under the Mountain. Watching Feyre die.” He looks at you, brushing hair back from your face. “I’ll never be able to save her, will I? I couldn’t then and now… Now the thing that is hurting her is not something I can take a knife and try to kill. The aftermath…. It is suffocating her. She is drowning and there is nothing that I can do. What are you supposed to do when you so desperately want to save someone you love and can’t?”
He looks at you momentarily, trying to find the words that will comfort you. How can he, when he feels the same way about you and your mortality? Every day is like a ticking clock drawing closer to the moment when he will lose you, and no matter how much he may know it’s coming, he knows he will never be prepared.  
“I don’t know… I wish I did…” His voice is so soft, that with your human ears, you almost don’t hear him. You nod, making a sound that’s half sniffle, half sigh. 
“Will you stay with me?” You ask, voice soft as tiredness begins to creep back over you.
“Of course. Always.”
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"You'd truly neutralize the cauldron? Aren't you at all curious about what it can do? How it can help you? Save your human twin, doomed to die before you?" You hear the king speak as his guards drag you in, fear bright in your eyes. You look to Feyre, to the family you've found in the night court and you could weep at the state of them. You hold your chin high, hoping to radiate bravery you don't feel as Feyre begs. You don't fight, you don't make a scene as the guards drag you to the large cauldron in the center of the room. You bite back your scream as they lower you in, the inky water so cold it's painful. And you don't fight as you're submerged, floating, suspended in a space much larger than what the cauldron should hold. The icy hot liquid burns your body as you change until finally, you're being dumped out onto the stone floor, shivering, sputtering, and coughing. Your new fae senses are immediately overwhelming. It's all too much. The sobbing, the begging. Nesta’s cries of fury. Elain’s sobbing. The sickening scent of blood. Even the stone floor, is far too cold and rough against your skin. You wish you could just close your eyes and fall asleep, fade into blissful unconsciousness where nothing is too much. You flinch, looking up as Lucian drapes his coat over you, no longer sure what he is to you. You try to tell yourself that you don’t care about the sadness in his eyes at your fear and uncertainty towards him. You just want it to all be over. You just want-
You awaken suddenly, shoving the male away from you. You move across the bed, putting as much space between your bodies as you can, grabbing a hairbrush from the vanity to arm yourself, before realizing it was Lucien. He watches you, hands raised in front of him, as if to calm you like you were a frightened animal. You throw the brush at the wall a foot or so away from him, hoping to drive him away. But he stays, watching you. You grab something else and throw it, this item shattering against the wall, but still he doesn’t leave. You hate the way he looks at you, hate the regret that fills his eyes. The pity. You throw something else towards the bathing room.
“Get out!” You scream, not caring how loud you’re being, not caring if you wake the whole of Spring. But he doesn’t, he just stands there, watching, waiting. After a few minutes, the sobs come and you sink to the ground. He crosses the room, sinking down next to you, pulling you into his arms. Tonight, you let him, some part of you tired of shoving him away, when you so desperately want him there. You cling to him, sobbing into his chest and he holds you tight. He brushes your hair out of your face, keeping it from clumping in your tears. He’s glad that you can’t see his face, seeing the tears that are threatening to spill. He knows that this is his fault. He couldn’t stop you from going into the cauldron and now you hate him. His mate hates him, and most of the time, he believes he deserves it. He flinches, startled out of his thoughts by your hand on his face. He leans into the tender touch, savoring it, despite his surprise.
“Why do you keep coming back when I treat you this way?” you ask.
“Because I deserve it. You should hate me.” I hate me is left unsaid.
“No, you don’t. I don’t.” You shouldn’t.
“Why not? I should have stopped it. Stopped them.”
“Perhaps. But what could you have done? Against Tamlin? Against… It wouldn’t have made a difference.” He says nothing, knowing that you’re right, but not wanting to agree.
“You couldn’t have done anything more than I could have with that knife Under the Mountain. I used to wonder why you didn’t try harder to stop Tamlin from suffocating her.”
“And now?”
You look him in the eyes. “Now I know you’re just as powerless as I am.”
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A/N: And there's fic 2 on the blog! I have a few ideas for the next chapter of both this one and Everything Could Be Okay. Hopefully, the next one for Lucien will be fluffier, he certainly deserves it!
divider once again by @tsunami-of-tears
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bella-goths-wife · 5 months
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I feel like we should have an actor au for the pet series where like the vees actors comfort the actor (who is the reader) after really distressing scenes I just like imagine vals actor being so sweet after the scene where val locked pet in a room with him to make her panic idk just a thought I would love to see because even though I luv the story line it always kills me when there is no comfort after things that happen even though sometimes they do comfort her it just makes me feel so icky and I feel like having an actor au will help people like me so that we can still enjoy it, with the reminder in the back of our heads that it is not real because even though its not real it still kinda feels real if you know what i mean because I get really immersed in x reader stories. I know this is a lot but just a suggestion no pressure I will still read and love it either way
I actually think this is a fun way to comfort the readers without straying from canon, I think I’ll probably do one for each of the characters each
Also they all have the same names as their characters :)
Vs pet actor au (Valentino version)
Warnings: val is worried, pet acts panicked, crying, non canon events,
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“Come here princesa” val coos in his characters voice to your character as you act out a fake shiver of fear
You act out the scene of abuse with fake tears streaming down your face. The scene was one that you had been nervous about for weeks, having known that it was a disturbing scene to watch and film.
In the scene, vals character had locked your character in a room with him to imply that he would possibly assault her like he had done to angels character to cause her to panic and breakdown.
You and val had gone over lines together in your trailer and lamented about how it would be a rough filming day for the two of you, considering you had the punishment scene to film just after.
But you put on a brave face as you acted out your scene with minimal distraction. You followed the script and your weeping character sat beside Val on the soft couch as the camera did a close up on your face to ensure they captured the panic in your eyes and the quiver in your bitten lips.
as it came time for val’s character Valentino to touch your thigh in a menacing implication, he did so and you felt a shiver uncomfortably run through you.
You suddenly became hyper aware of the people behind the cameras who had their eyes peeled on you, and how the pink lighting shined so brightly on you.
As your cue came to jump into val’s arms, you froze completely with your face lowered to your thigh and tears running down your cheeks.
“Cut” the director called out and it broke you out your frozen daydream
“Everything okay kid?” Val whispers with a concerned look as he removes his hand from your thigh
“I don’t think I can do it” you whisper back through tears as you face your back to the cameras
“Everything okay up there guys?” The director called out with a concerned expression
Val uses his wings to hide your face and tucked you against his chest before he answered, making sure to spare you any embarrassment.
“We’re gonna need a 15 minute break” val called back politely “private please”
The director nodded with an understanding look before calling most of the set to go on a break away from the filming Scene.
Val turned to you and put a hand on your shoulder.
“Are you okay kid?” Val asks with a worried look as he pulls you away from his chest to observe your expression
“Yeah” you say with a shaky inhale as you wipe your tearful eyes with your palm “it all got a bit much for me”
“I get it kid, it’s a hard scene to film for everyone” val says with a nod and a soothing tone “that’s why I tried to put it off for as long as possible”
“I’m just not used to doing scenes like this guess” you say with a sigh “I had the same problem with Vox during our panic scene, I think it just gets too much for me”
“Your playing a very difficult role honey, it’s understandable that you’ll get a bit freaked out during your scenes” val says gently
“I can’t believe I made them stop shooting, I bet they’re all so mad at me now” you say with an embarrassed groan “I should have just continued”
“Hey, hey, no one is mad at you” val says with a reassuring tone “your having to put yourself in very disturbing scenarios, you have every right to stop filming when you feel uncomfortable and anyone who tells you otherwise hasn’t got a clue about how much work these scenes take”
You nod with a frown, still embarrassed about your freak out, Val notices and wraps his arm around your shoulder
“How about we go get some water and then go talk to the intimacy coordinator about how we can make it feel less overwhelming” val suggests with a smile “or we can try and ask if we could use your body double for the scenes where my hand is physically touching you”
“Yeah” you say with a small nod and a smile “let’s go talk to the intimacy coordinator please”
“Of course sweetheart” val says with a gentle smile as he wraps his hand and wing around your shoulders and begins to guide you to the door.
You managed to work out a way to make the scene to work after a few different attempts and you captured your best shots before retreating to your trailer with Val in tow as you both celebrated a successful scene by eating food while you had your wigs, makeup and costumes removed.
After that day, Val made it a point to always be present during your harder scenes and was always checking in on you during the breaks between takes. He also made sure to update the intimacy coordination on your preferences so they could be added to your filming contract.
You were the youngest of the actors he was working with, and he wanted to make sure you were completely protected while on set.
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Should I do more?
Sorry it’s so short 😭
Tag list:
@the-faceless-bride @idontreallyexistyet @ivebeenthearchersstuff @hazbinhotelxreader @fandomaddict505 @corvid007 @buttercupfangirl @lilyalone @rerarlo @perkypeony @sparkleyfishies @repostingmyfavs
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chogiwow · 6 months
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for well and for good | park sunghoon
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pairing: sunghoon x gn!reader
genre: angst
wc: 1k
warnings: allusions to a toxic past relationship (sunghoon and unnamed ex), crying (a lot), hurt-no-comfort fic, heartbreak; sunghoon realises his feelings for you too late
a/n: all i want is to break hearts <3
a/n pt 2: umm, not a solid plot but more so like a scene building concept?
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there wasn’t a more heartbreaking moment than this, not for sunghoon; not even when the consequences of his actions that led him here had played out exactly as you had warned him it would.
now it was too late, and beg as he might, a heavy feeling in his chest slowly settled against his favour, a premonition turning true and cry as much as he wanted, everything was spiralling out of control so fast, he wasn’t sure who he should save first.
“(y/n)...(y/n) please, i can’t do this, i can’t live without you. i’m sorry, i’m so sorry, please don’t leave, i need you…i love you.”
the more he weeped for a lost cause, the more it hurt your chest and ripped you apart piece by piece but you made no attempts at stopping the pain.
everyone had always assumed that you and sunghoon would be the endgame. it was so obvious! you both were head over heels for each other, but of course, of course the heart wavers ever so often now and then. sunghoon let himself ignore all the signs, pretend that the affection and sweet words weren’t another ploy for his wealth, his looks, his popularity, the safety and love he was so willing to provide someone, because he was always so very generous. generous and ridiculously naive; always looking to give away a piece of himself to anyone who so much as asked for it.
and a man in love is hard to sway again, especially when the man is sunghoon, with his giving nature and so much love that filled his heart that he couldn’t contain it any longer.
words were said – spit almost venomously at the cost of saving face and pride, and how dare you question his love and hers, when you had no business? how dare you make assumptions about this beautiful woman who loved him – at least he hoped she did – as much as he did?
and then…and then everything you said came true. your warnings carefully etched themselves like knife carvings on a paper – vehemently and so very stubbornly irreversible. now he’s here, after months of grieving not just the loss of his trust in love, but also you. and he had to make things right, but how does one convince a person they've broken and trampled upon so mercilessly, that they are indeed in love with them?
how does sunghoon convince you that he’s so utterly in love with you that he could physically feel the pain of your pointed ignoring and cold looks? how does he even begin to express how sorry he was when the unsaid apology squeezed the breath out of him in aggrieved pants? how does sunghoon not lose you again?
“”i’m sorry hoon, i can’t do this anymore. i can’t love you anymore, i don’t want to love you anymore…you’ve hurt me too much.”
“(y/n) please, please i beg you,”
and beg he did; getting down on his knees on the cold tile floors of your living room, he wrapped his arms around your waist and dampened your shirt with his hot tears. neither he nor you were making much sense of this conversation anymore.
he felt you shake in his embrace, your own tears and gasps of air breaking his chants of an apology, his hands tightening around you to physically feel your touch after months.
“hoon stop it,” a wretched sob, ugly as it sounded when it tumbled out of your lips in pain, like a helpless rotten fruit falling off its branches, makes you whimper and clutch onto the clinging man's hand who refused to let you go.
in a hurried motion sunghoon is up on his feet, holding you by the shoulder that shakes with the cries staining your cheeks.
“i can’t live without you, please give me another chance,” he shakes his head frantically, mumbling out his words in a frenzy as he is yet again painfully reminded of exactly how weighted his words were and how much truth they held in them. it weighed him down, your refusal to look past this, like a sack of cotton drowning in water, and yet he could not bring himself to blame you, hoping against hope that his words would make a change.
his lips find your forehead, pressing down on them in a hot kiss; the trembling of his lips breaks you, you wish would stop – but he doesn’t. he’s kissing your shoulder, your arms, your wrists, your palms and he’s kissing your forehead – again and again and again and again – until you push yourself away, your eyes closed, shaking your head.
“don’t, it’s time we stopped this. we can’t hope for things that were never meant to be.”
sunghoon was standing on the edge of a cliff, and you just pushed him off into a bottomless pit that made his insides curl into themselves, his hands shooting in the air for something to grasp but there’s only air that passes through his fingers like bullets.
in his last attempt he kisses you on the lips. he holds your face so gently and kisses you so deeply and for a moment you feel yourself swaying. you let him kiss you, because you know this would be the last time you would let this happen. you whimper into his mouth and he lets a broken sob tumble on your lips where it stays as a reminder of this very moment, searing you both apart. you don’t kiss back.
“stop it, please. you’re hurting me.” it’s a whispered plea, but to sunghoon it’s a huge boulder that blocks his way from you. you’ve planted it there for once and for all, and he knows that there’s nothing he can do to make you move it.
“i’m sorry, i love you, but i don't want to anymore. i’m sorry.” 
sunghoon rests his forehead against yours, your tears mingled and continuous and he knows he’s lost you now, for well and for good.
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Do you agree that Chloe only cared about Adrien cause of his social status ? Cause that's what Astruc has said on Twitter regarding how Chloe viewed her friendship with Adrien. Do you believe this intent of their relationship was portrayed correctly in the show ?
I think that this statement accurately describes the way that Chloe was written in season one. She never read as Adrien's close friend and we got scenes like these two from Dark Cupid where she wanted his autograph to show off for some reason:
Chloé: Hi Adrien, sign here please. Adrien: (sighs) Oh, come on, you know I hate signing autographs, Chloé. Chloé: Oh, that's not what this is. This is a petition against cruelty to hamsters. Have you seen some of the ugly sweaters they are forced to wear? It's appalling. (Adrien begrudgingly signs the poster. Chloé hugs the poster and Sabrina smiles before they notice Marinette who is digging through a trash can as she pulls out a sheet of paper.)
[Scene change]
Chloé: Keep dreaming all you want girls but the boy is mine. (Sabrina nods before unrolling the poster, the girls gasping) Aurore: "To Chloé, the most awesome girl in the world and the love of my life. Signed, Adrien." (All the girls begin to cry, then Chloé looks at one girl who tries not to burst out crying) Chloé: Uh, she's not crying enough.
However, much like Alya's obsession with Ladybug's secret identity and Adrien's ability to leave his house, this part of Chloe's character disappeared after season one, making it feel like something they tried and then decided to discard. While that's not a sign of great writing quality, it's also not a neon warning sign. It's not unusual for formula shows to have these kinds of growing pains. First seasons often have random things that contradict later seasons such as everything about Nathalie's season one writing.
So while season one backs this read, I don't think it's fair to say that Chloe read this way any time after season one and season one is full of things that got discarded, so it's not grasping at straws to say that season one Chloe wasn't fully formed. This is especially true because of the way the writers reintroduced her in both Origins and season two.
Origins introduced many new elements such as Adrien's social isolation and the wish that was driving Gabriel to terrorize Paris. In other words, it's the episode that lays the groundwork for the entire show. If a thing is in Origins, then it matters because the writers only had 40 minutes to establish every important element for how they want these character to be read. This is a problem because Origins didn't make Chloe a vapid mean girl who clung to new boy Adrien. Instead, Origins had Adrien walk into school, see Chloe, and call her by name, leading her to reply with a dorky childhood nickname:
Adrien: Hey, Chloé! Chloé: Adrikins! You came!
She's also the only person who knows that Adrien will be starting school this year because, for some reason, Origins made the choice to elevate Adrien and Chloe's relationship to close childhood friends. That is NOT the kind of move you make if you want Chloe to feel like someone who only cares about Adrien for his fame. While that may potentially happen in real life, this is a story. The writers have full control over the characters' backstories. Who in their right mind picks a childhood friends backstory to complicate things if they don't want Chloe to really care about Adrien as a person?
Despair Bear only further contradicts this "Chloe doesn't care" idea by having Chloe break down over the idea of Adrien ending their friendship:
Jean: Mademoiselle does not look very happy, today. (lifts up a plate of luxury chocolates and offers them to Chloé.) (Chloé grabs the chocolates all at once and eats them, concurrently, and then weeps) Chloé: Adrien says I have to be nice to everyone or he won't be my friend anymore! How can he do this to me, Jean-Michel? Jean: Uh, my name is... hm, never mind. Ah, perhaps Mademoiselle can see comfort with Mr. Cuddly? (Chloé is delighted and grabs Mr. Cuddly, her teddy bear, and hugs it)
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[Image description: Chloe crying and eating chocolates because Adrien said they can't be friends anymore]
This is not the kind of reaction you give a character who doesn't care about Adrien on a personal level. She comes across as caring about him deeply. If she didn't care, then she'd probably just brush him off and say, "Your loss." But she doesn't. She reacts with the same sort of sorrow that we see when her parents are akumatized or when her mother refuses to acknowledge her.
We also see her go out of her way to try to appease Adrien by throwing a party and forcing herself to play nice so that he stays her friend. She only stops playing nice when he promises that they'll stay friends:
Adrien: That was a great idea of inviting Marinette's dad! Chloé: I know. This way, no one can be mad at me for calling the fire department. I'm really nice now, did you notice, Adrikins? Even Ladybug said so! Didn't she, Jean-Pascal? Adrien: I'm proud of you, Chloé. I think you've proven that you're capable of making an effort to be nicer to everyone. Chloé: Aww, Adrikins! So we'll always be best friends, forever? Pinky swear? Adrien: Pinky swear! Chloé: (Exhales and saunters off) (To Kim) So, those macarons are dreadfully ugly. (Kim sighs.) (To Mylène.) Those are so greasy, you can see yourself in them. (Mylène cries and faint.) (To Marinette.) Urgh. Too disgusting for comment. (To Rose.) Those look horrible. (Rose faints.)
That is more effort than Chloe has ever put into anything on screen and that's a problem because - once again - this is not how you write a vapid mean girl who doesn't care. This is how you write someone who actually cares about Adrien. They even chose to show us young Chloe and young Adrien being cute during Chloe's "flashback" to getting her teddy bear:
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[Image description: Teen Chloe surrounded by drawings of important childhood memories with her teddy bear. We see her getting the bear from a faceless figure, holding the bear as her mother walks away, sleeping with the bear, holding the bear while she cries, and excitedly showing the bear to a young Adrien]
There's also the issue that, after season one, Chloe doesn't seem to actually care that much about social clout. At that start of this post, I used a scene from Dark Cupid specifically because it feels kind of out of character for her. In the later seasons, Chloe may flaunt her social status and think that it makes her better than others, but she doesn't do things like the poster thing because that requires her to care what random people think and that's just not how she reads. Chloe reads more like someone who doesn't care what most people think because she thinks that she's better than them (or, at least, she wants to think that. Chloe has the potential to be a fun little ball of self-hatred and doubt, but either way, she is acting like she doesn't care what other people think outside of a very select group.)
I think this really shows when we compare Chloe to Lila. Lila reads like someone who cares about social clout. Someone who is desperate to be seen in a certain way. Someone who sees dating Adrien as a status symbol and nothing more. Chloe reads like someone who sees Adrien as the only person of her caliber, so of course they'd get together. That's a subtle, but very important difference. It's the difference between someone who doesn't have social clout and needs Adrien to get it and someone who already has social clout and therefore doesn't need a popular boyfriend to prop her up. She just thinks dating an unpopular boy is beneath her.
I've mentioned before that Chloe reads SUPER aroace to me and this is actually why. To me, it comes across like she does actually care deeply about Adrien, but she has no true romantic or sexual feelings for him or even any clue what those feelings actually feel like. Given the way her parents' relationship is written, I also don't see Chloe having a healthy idea of what a romantic relationship looks like. I think she sees it as a way to show off how much better you are then the nobodies of the world because love is for fairytales. Marriage is about alliances of wealth and power and Adrien is both wealthy and her childhood friend, so of course they'd get married! They already know that they can at least tolerate each other. Why look for a different match?
In summary: the writers may have wanted Chloe to be a vapid mean girl who didn't care about Adrien as a person, but they completely failed to write her that way after season one, so she comes across as genuinely caring, but unable to express those feelings in a healthy way because of her own issues and poor childhood.
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