#day6 hard hours

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Young K: One Door Away [Part 2]

i truly cannot believe it's been almost 2 years since i posted the first part of this! 😬 it makes me incredibly happy to hear that you all enjoyed it so much, all my younghyun stories hold special places in my heart, so i'm happy to continue this one and hope you all like it too 💗 (fyi there will be a part 3, this story's not over yet!!)

Younghyun x Fem Reader. Smut (office coworkers, mutual pining). 5.3k

[Part 1]

You blinked your tired eyelids, a heavy sigh pushing itself out as you stretched and waited for your vision to adjust. You saw a pile of clothes on the chair next to your head: black men's dress pants, a sleek blue tie, and a maroon blazer...your maroon blazer. Suddenly everything came back to you, and you remembered you were not in your own room. Your head whipped around and you saw Younghyun still asleep, the soft skin of his bare chest a lovely golden hue in the light of the morning sunrise that streamed in through the large hotel window. So it wasn't a dream. You really had slept with Younghyun, the man you'd been pining over for God knows how long. You sat up and a blush rushed through you when you remembered all the things you'd said and done to and with each other the night before. Not that you wanted to take them back, certainly not, but slightly embarrassing to think about nonetheless. Things you'd only fantasized about, kept locked in your head for so long, had become reality.

A mild panic took over your senses though, the more you thought (and over thought). What if he didn't really like you that much? What if he was just trying to fuck you? What if now that he had, he would drop you, not talk to you at work anymore? What if, what if, what if?

You felt Younghyun stir then, and glanced over at him again. He carded a hand through his tousled hair and smiled up at you. "Hello," he chuckled groggily.

"Hi." You smiled warmly back at him, happy to see that he seemed okay. Despite everything he'd told you the night before, you still couldn't help your self doubt. It wouldn't go away that easily, despite your thoughts last night that it would.

Younghyun stretched an arm out across the mattress, silently inviting you into the warmth of his embrace, and you couldn't resist the urge to lay back down with him. So you didn't.

You fell back onto your side and your heart skipped a beat when he pulled you in to kiss you. That certainly helped convince you he was really into you. You started to wonder at what point you wouldn't need that kind of reassurance, if ever, and sighed internally at yourself.

"What time is it?" He asked through a yawn. You'd both stayed up late, indulging in quite a few fantasies for longer than you originally anticipated.

"Eight fifteen," you answered.

"Ugh, we have to check out by nine."

Your heart sank a bit at the acknowledgement that your little trip was almost over. You'd have to go back to "the real world", to your complicated lives that were suddenly even more complicated, instead of this sort of oasis you'd created.

"Hm, so forty five minutes yet?" You smirked, climbing to your knees and moving to straddle him.

Younghyun chuckled, getting the idea, and rubbed at his still sleepy eyes. "I suppose so. What did you have in mind?"

"Dunno," you shrugged, but pulled the T-shirt you'd borrowed over your head, leaving you completely naked.

Younghyun smirked and shook his head, then lunged playfully at you, tumbling you onto your back and pinning you against the bed below him, sending a high-pitched giggle from you. He glanced down, drinking in the sight of your body, then back up to your eyes, making you blush again.

But his expression was one of warm comfort, his gaze more loving than lustful. Younghyun lowered himself to press his chest, pleasantly warm, to yours, skin against skin, and kissed you passionately, not pulling back until you were both breathless. His lips just fit so perfectly against yours, you didn't even care if you had morning breath.

"We really can't be too long," he said halfheartedly between little kisses now. "Gotta pack..."

"Yeah..." You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him closer, really not wanting to face the rest of the world when this perfect moment was right here and now, so warm and cozy...

Younghyun kissed you again as his hands curved over your legs. They moved over your waist, your torso, groped at your breasts briefly, and ended at your jaw, cradling it. A long, dissatisfied sigh left him before he reluctantly pulled back, forcing himself to sit up and get the day started.

You sighed too and subconsciously pouted as you stretched, then got up as well, cool, air-conditioned air ruining the warm bed.

You felt how shaky your legs were when you tried to stand, and tumbled back onto the mess of sheets for a moment. Ruffling your tousled hair, that you were sure looked like an absolute wreck, you heard Younghyun snicker as he walked past you.

"This is all your fault, you know," you teased, calling towards him as he entered the bathroom.

He laughed heartily and came back out in a few seconds, toothbrush in hand. "Uh huh, and why's that?" He leaned against the wall near the bathroom and started brushing away, watching you stretch your sore muscles. You grabbed your own shirt off the chair and pulled it on.

"You're the one who wanted to keep going," you answered with a sly smirk, securing a couple of buttons on your shirt. "Maybe I wouldn't be so sore today if we'd stopped after the first couple rounds."

Younghyun pulled the brush from his mouth and spoke in a slightly muffled voice. "Oh right, like you didn't want to keep going too."

You were only teasing him, of course; you wanted to keep fucking him the night before just as much as he did, if not more so. And while, yes, your muscles did ache a bit today, it was well worth it, and you didn't regret your actions at all.

"Hmm, maybe," you quipped.

You glanced at the clock; 8:21 now. Sighing, you grabbed the rest of your stuff and remembered then that you had locked yourself out of your own room. You actually couldn't recall if you'd left the adjoining room door unlocked from your side or not. So you tried the door. It opened. So you must have. Wishful thinking must have swayed your actions; hopes that you would have a chance to have a night alone with Younghyun.

"Gonna shower and pack, I'll meet you at nine," you called to Younghyun, who acknowledged it positively.

So you did exactly that, doing your best to stay focused on your tasks, even though all you wanted to do was jump around your room giddily and hop back into bed with Younghyun. In the middle of packing, you heard your phone buzz, and checked it to see Hyerin had texted you.

Hyerin: updates pls?? 🤲

You rolled your eyes but couldn't help the huge smile that crept across your face. You wanted to call her and gush about the night you'd had. But things were just starting out, and you didn't want to jinx it. Besides, you had things to do, and didn't want Younghyun overhearing your conversation.

You: tell you when i get home!

That should be good enough. You set your phone down but it buzzed again before you fully set it down.

Hyerin: so there are updates???

You ignored it, getting back to packing, but heard a few more buzzes over the next few minutes. You got a quick shower, got dressed, and when you were ready to go, it was nearly 9:00. You cleared away your text notifications from your lock screen, not bothering to read them right now, and headed out the door with your luggage. Younghyun met you in the hallway just a couple minutes later, the door locking behind him. You didn't see him in casual clothes too often, but he looked extra cute in his jeans and t-shirt.

"Alright, let's go," he said with a smile.

🚪

When you were both back at work Monday morning, things were different. You knew they would be, but you were nervously unsure of the ways they would be.

While most were positive, you were a realist, and still acutely aware of the fact that things could always go sour. And then you'd be stuck working together with that between you.

You'd talked with him on the plane ride home how you'd handle things at the office. You both agreed it was far too early to say you were dating (you hardly knew if that was even true yet, anyway). For now, to them, nothing had changed between you two. To your coworkers, you and Younghyun we also only coworkers.

But you found yourself smiling more. In a better mood.

The next day, Tuesday, you met in Younghyun's office to compile your notes, the connections you'd made and information you'd received while at the conference. His door closed behind you and your heart pounded harder, especially when you heard the lock quietly click. This was the first time you were alone with him since getting home. Lucky for you he didn't leave you hanging. The second he turned around he whisked you into his arms and kissed you for the first time since you'd returned from your perfect weekend.

"Sorry," he said with a happy sigh, pulling away. Kissing you at work; was it professional? No. But were you happy he did it? Of course. Besides, it's not like you could focus on work distracted by his presence. Letting off a little steam now and then was...a good thing then? Right?

That logic was good enough for you. You didn't let him go far before pulling him back into your arms, lips back on his. Younghyun relaxed against you, smiling against your lips and kissing you back, wrapping his arms as far around you as they would reach.

"We shouldn't...at work..."

He nodded in agreement but neither of you showed any indication of stopping. "I know."

You found yourself soon straddling Younghyun while he sat in his office chair, your skirt hiked up your thighs and one too many buttons on his shirt undone. It was taboo, it was unprofessional, and it was exactly what you'd been fantasizing about for months. Younghyun mouthed hungrily across your jaw and down your neck, his hands helping your hips rock against his. Everything was rushed, breathless, hot. You wrapped your arms around him, pressing your body into his touch, small whines making their way through your heavy breaths. Your hands carded through his hair as his mouth nipped at your collarbone, getting lost in how perfect it felt to be in his arms. Your hips were moving without his help now, rolling along his crotch, lust guiding your every action. You could feel Younghyun was getting hard but there was a part of you that was tied to reality, your rational brain pushing its way to the forefront. You reluctantly pulled back and though he instinctively moved towards you, you used your hands to physically push him back. Younghyun looked up at you expectantly, hair and clothes so gorgeously mussed.

"We can't do this here. Or, at least...I can't."

Younghyun swallowed hard and wiped his mouth that was a bit stained by your lipstick and nodded, pulling himself back up in his chair as you climbed off him. You stood in front of him, wanting so desperately to sit back down. But you really liked this job, and being here, in the moment, the paranoia that you might lose it broke through it all. But you didn't know if you could verbalize these feelings to Younghyun at the moment.

"I understand. It's totally fine." He cleared his throat and worked on retying his tie while you pulled your skirt back down. You sat into the chair on the other side of his desk and saw him adjust the tent in his pants. Ugh, leaving him like that felt cruel, to both of you. "I'll just...get off in the bathroom later," he said with a chuckle, smoothing his hair back into place.

"Sorry."

"No no, hey..." He waited for you to look at him. "I'm not gonna do anything you're not comfortable with. I promise."

Ughhhhh. Maybe...it wouldn't be a big deal if you did one or two things. Apparently Brennan and Sooin were doing it pretty often and they were still here. Why couldn't you let loose and have a little bit of your own fun?

You quickly undid a few buttons on your shirt as you walked back around to his side, and his brow furrowed, confused. "You don't need the bathroom." You sank to your knees and yanked at his belt, fumbling to undo it and his zipper, but he stopped you.

"Y/N, no." His hand held yours tightly and his voice sounded authoritative, which you were certain was not having the effect he intended. It only made you want him more. "I'm serious; I'm not letting you do something you're not comfortable doing."

"I know. I want to do this."

He studied your face, searching for any sign of wavering, but evidently he could tell you were fine, so he wordlessly let go of your hands and let them resume their task. Younghyun adjusted in his chair, helping you get his dick out, biting hard to his lip. Your heart pounded in your chest, a flush rushing through you when you had his length in your hands again. It grew harder in your grip, the veins trailing up it deliciously, the head red and starting to leak precum already. You watched his face as you dragged your tongue up the shaft, reveling in the way his mouth hung ajar. You swirled your tongue over the head then pulled it between your lips with a light moan. God, your mouth was simply watering. You heard the bustle of your office just outside his door, but you had found a way to bring the little slice of paradise you'd formed with him in Chicago back home. In the back of your mind you knew....there was no way this could be a regular occurrence. You'd have to do these things in the privacy of your own home, like everybody else (well, almost everybody else). And that was fine. Actually, that was more than fine, so long as Younghyun continued to be the one there with you. But for right now, this was perfect.

"God, your mouth feels so fucking good, " he murmured, not wanting to be too loud. His hand ran through your hair and gently pushed. Clearly he was impatient for more, perhaps worried about the time. You didn't waste any more time then, letting your jaw fall slack and taking in as much of him as you could, then hollowing your cheeks for suction. "Oh Y/N..." Younghyun breathed hard through his nose, teeth digging further into his reddened bottom lip. You worked your hand over the base of his length and bobbed your mouth over the rest, moving quickly, just wanting to see him cum. Besides, the longer you spent on this, the more turned on you were getting.  You knew you didn't have the luxury of time for you both to get off.

"Want you to cum in my mouth, Younghyun." You moved quickly, pushing him on, coaxing him along to that exact endpoint, and you heard his breath catch. He gripped the black plastic arm of his office chair and let his head fall back.

"That's not gonna be hard, believe me."

You smiled to yourself, absolutely loving that you could seemingly have the effect on him that he had on you.

You felt the way he subtly thrust into your throat, the way the head of his cock bumped against the roof of your mouth, and you struggled to keep your hand out from under your own skirt. Your panties were stuck to your skin and simply ruined by now, and your clit throbbed for attention. You weren't sure how you'd make it through the rest of the day, but you knew you'd be having a busy night with your vibe when you got home. You heard your phone chime in your pocket with an email notification and rolled your eyes. It could wait.

"I'm gonna...I'm so close," he groaned. He brought his gaze back to yours and held it, intently watching you, pupils dark with lust. "Gonna cum in your mouth, baby..." Those last words drifted out of him dreamily, like he couldn't believe his luck. That tone made your heart warm and the words made your pussy throb.

"Mhmm," you encouraged, taking his length further into your throat, almost making you gag. But you pushed on, doing your best to breathe through your nose, and just when you were about to pull off for some much needed air, he pulled you off himself.

"I got it, I'm--I'm gonna cum." He leaned forward and his hand took the place of yours. You sat back, positioning your outstretched tongue right in front of him. "God, you're so good, so fucking good." His hand tugged at his cock so quickly, in mere seconds you felt his warm release hit your tongue, splatter across your lips. The sound he made when he hit his climax was like fucking music to your ears, and you were absolutely soaked at this point. You were sure if you walked out of his office at that moment anyone who passed you would be able to smell exactly how turned on he made you. Thankfully your office was right next door and the day was nearly over.

Younghyun held your chin in his palm and tilted it up, letting you look into his eyes. You could see the genuine appreciation in his eyes, even when they were clouded with lust. He leaned down and kissed you, letting his tongue mingle with yours, saliva and cum mixing messily and making you feel absolutely filthy. You wanted to feel like that every day.

Younghyun helped you to your feet and you kissed again, both of you having a hard time pulling away from each other's lips. "How 'bout we get this work done?"

He sighed and rebuckled his belt and zipped his pants back up. "Yeah, we really should."

It certainly was not easy, but you got your mind almost entirely back on track, though it was extra difficult when every time you moved you could feel a huge damp spot between your legs. But finally you finished your work with him and were done for the day.

This would work, right? You wondered to yourself again if you were making a mistake, involving yourself with a colleague like this. It was clearly distracting you, and you worried it would affect your career. You walked to your car, your mind full of anxious thoughts, but Younghyun's voice broke in, when you heard him calling your name.

You turned around and saw him lightly jogging to catch up with you.

"What are you doing tonight?"

"Um...just gonna eat dinner and watch some movies, I guess." And jerk off as many times as I can.

"If you want, I'd really like to take you to dinner, and also repay you for your, er...service." He smiled at you and you couldn't help but laugh at his phrasing. "Not necessarily in that order."

You blushed a bit and looked around, wondering if anyone saw you talking to him or heard him asking you out.

But you did want to go out with him. "Okay, yeah. That'd be nice." You smiled back and hitched your bag higher on your shoulder. "Time?"

"6:30?"

"Sounds good." You dropped your eyes, getting a bit shy at the idea someone you worked with could see or maybe even hear you. This wasn't what you'd talked about; you had planned to keep things quiet at work. Between an office blowjob and now him asking you out so blatantly...Could your plan already be going awry after only two days?

"I'll pick you up, just text me your address."

"Okay." You started to swerve away from him to make your way to your car, but his hand caught yours, stopping you.

"Wait, Y/N." You turned around, and you both had to move then to get out of the path of your coworker's car that was coming through. You instinctively yanked your hand out of his grasp and gave a little wave to your coworker as she passed. "Listen, I..." His voice dropped a bit so you knew only you could hear. "I know we've moved...pretty fast...physically." Younghyun cleared his throat and shifted his weight nervously. "But like I said the first night in my hotel room, I'm not usually so forward. And I don't usually, you know...do things like this. I don't want you to get the wrong idea. I just really like you."

You figured that was probably the case, especially because it was for you too. You so appreciated hearing him say that, though, as it helped immensely with your self doubt. But this was not the time nor the place. "I know, I'm not...really like this either, usually. We can talk about it more tonight. I'll see you at 6:30."

🚪

Younghyun picked you up right on time, and you felt almost giddy getting into the car. Outside of work, you could be normal, in a relationship like anybody else. You hopped into the car and gave him a big kiss that made him giggle, and you were off to your first official date with him.

He took you to your favorite restaurant and you had such a wonderful, relaxing evening. You connected with him so well, he was able to make your anxieties about work the furthest thing from your mind.

"I still have to repay you for this afternoon," he noted as he took another bite of his steak.

You shrugged innocently and smiled as you sipped your drink. "I wanted to do it. You don't have to repay me." While you meant that, you were also just dying to have him touch you too. You'd held back from masturbating the way you had planned and even though you'd changed from the soaked panties you'd worn at work, the current ones were quickly getting to a similar state.

Younghyun chuckled darkly and grabbed his own glass. "Not a chance."

You smiled and crossed your legs in an effort to quiet your clit that throbbed for attention.

He cleared his throat and broke the small lull. "Y/N, I wanted to get back to what I'd said in the parking lot earlier." He put his utensils down and crossed his arms on the table, giving you his full attention. You remembered his words and your heart started pounding. You stayed quiet and let him talk. "I...wouldn't have gotten involved with you unless I had good intentions. I don't want you thinking I'm some playboy that sleeps around. Or that I've only been with you for sex."

You let him finish his thought and nodded understandingly. Although you didn't want to believe it, that thought had crossed your mind, so you appreciated him acknowledging it without you needing to bring it up. You set your glass down and gave him your attention in return. "I know that, Younghyun. I don't think that about you. And I'm not...used to doing so much, so soon either." You dropped your gaze, embarrassed now. "It's been awhile since I've been with anyone."

"Me too."

You both left that topic alone after that, not wanting to dwell on it. You switched your conversation to a lighter one. It was so easy with him, you loved how freely you could talk to him. It felt like you'd known him your whole life.

🚪

You weren't sure exactly why you both were always so ready to jump the other's bones; you figured it was a combination of waiting so long to get together, having sexual tension built up for so long, and being in the proverbial "newlywed phase" of your relationship. But whatever it was, it landed you back in Younghyun's lap, straddling him in the front seat of his car in the back of the dark restaurant parking lot, like a couple of horny teenagers. But he did want to repay you, and who were you to deny him that?

He fumbled for the button on the side of his seat, sliding it back as far as it would go to give you more room. Your hips rutted desperately against his, your mouths moving perfectly together, his hot breath mixing with yours.

Younghyun's fingers slipped under your dress, the tips of the digits gliding along the outside crotch of your panties. "Oh my God, you're so wet already."

You blushed a bit, somewhat embarrassed at how crazy he made you, but you knew he'd find it hot. "Been wet ever since I sucked you off," you said breathlessly, spreading your legs more to give him better access. He moved your panties aside and let a single finger play with your clit, and you hummed your approval into his mouth. It was such a small action, but it felt so fucking good. The car was already getting humid, the windows starting to fog from two sets of heavy breathing. You yanked your shirt over your head and he quickly dropped his head to mouth over the swell of your breasts. A finger entered you and made you gasp, hands flying to grip the seat at either side of his head.

"This what we're gonna do?" You chuckled airily. "Just 'repay' each other over and over again?"

Younghyun laughed against your skin then peered up at you. "'Course not. You think I'm letting you go one of these times without fucking you?" Fuck. Part of you wished he'd do just that right at that moment, but you also couldn't get yourself to stop him when he was already making you feel so good. His hand moved quickly now, and he held your gaze and watched your mouth slip into an "O" shape, rubbing harshly to your clit and making you moan loudly.

His free hand came up to pull the cup of your bra out of the way, his tongue poking out to play with your nipple, prodding and teasing it deliciously. It felt like live wires were connecting you, sparking with every touch. You knew you would cum easily if he kept this up.

"Ah, Younghyun, please don't stop, please..." Younghyun sucked at your nipple, groaning all the while, his fingers making you see stars. You felt your heels hit his steering wheel and gripped your hands tighter on the headrest. Your climax was within reach, right there, already. Your voice got higher in pitch, your hips rutting more strongly, and Younghyun didn't stop for a second, determinedly reaching his goal. Your eyes jumped down to catch his just as your orgasm washed over you, the dark sensuality in his heightening the feelings that much more. You gripped his hair and pulled him off your nipple, leaning down to shove your tongue into his mouth hungrily. He moaned into your mouth and his fingers curled inside you and made you gasp, your pussy swollen and throbbing in overstimulation. Clenching as he pulled his fingers out, completely breathless, you closed your eyes and tried to swallow hard, but your mouth was quite dry. Your head was spinning at the whirlwind orgasm, but your weren't exactly surprised it didn't take you long, since you'd been so horny for the last few hours. Younghyun brought his dripping, sticky fingers up to his lips, making you blush as he sucked them clean. "Don't, oh my God," you giggled, embarrassed, pushing his hand down.

But he resisted, groaning at the taste when he got his fingers back into his mouth. "You taste so sweet, baby, I'd never let that go to waste. Need you to sit on my face again, like that first night."

Your pussy clenched again at the memory alone, and you sighed, sitting further back on his thighs. Your own were weak from shaking and your heart was thrumming strongly in your chest, but you felt that melancholy feeling of reality creeping back in when he kissed you.

He pulled back but kept his forehead pressed to yours, his warm breath ghosting over your cheeks. "It's late, gotta work in the morning. Let me take you home."

You sat in blissful, sleepy silence while he drove you home, watching the lights out the window pass, each stop light and street lamp like a twinkling Christmas light to you in your rose-colored haze. At least you could have this feeling outside of work. But every time you thought of the office again, you worried. Things were so different now. If you had to choose between Younghyun and your career, you worried you wouldn't know the right decision to make. You turned to look at him, remembering how he used to look to you when you were merely coworkers, just a few days ago even. Things changed so quickly, maybe they could change quickly again...

🚪

"So when are you and Younghyun gonna do something?"

You took a bite of your sandwich and raised your eyebrows with an inquisitive expression as Sooin sat beside you for lunch in the break room a few days later. "...'Do something'?"

"You know, get together. It's so obvious you want to."

God, if she only knew. But you were glad she didn't. Evidently she didn't suspect anything was going on between you and Younghyun already. And you preferred to keep it that way. It was really none of her business.

"What, like you and Brennan?" You scolded yourself internally for mentioning that as soon as it left your mouth. You weren't sure if that was something you were supposed to pretend to not know.

But she smiled, taking a bite of her pasta smugly. "Yes."

You popped a chip into your mouth and tried to seem nonchalant. You didn't want to get into this with her, even if she was probably the one person in your office who would understand your situation. "We're just friends."

"Whatever you say." She clearly didn't buy it, but so long as she didn't pry, it didn't faze you much. Unfortunately, she continued. "But I'm just saying, I can tell you like him. And he seems like he likes you. He's cute; someone else might snatch him up if you don't hop to it. Hell, I probably would have took my shot if Brennan hadn't gotten to me first." You might have something to say had your situation been different. If you weren't already with him, you might have a comeback, something to get her off your back. But you simply held your tongue. "I've seen Marissa eyeing him."

The mention of the cute new receptionist's name almost put you over the edge. You were so happy with Younghyun, and that should be enough, at least for now, but a big part of you wanted to just scream that you were with him, that you'd gone out with him, that you'd fucked him, that you'd sucked his dick, that you'd sat on his beautiful fucking face. But you didn't. You took another bite of your sandwich and you let it go. You were at work, in a professional environment, not in a frat house. You were all coworkers, not on a reality dating show.

"She can look wherever she wants. I told you, Sooin; Younghyun and I are just friends."

"Okay..."

🚪

You had a meeting with a couple of coworkers after lunch, including your "friend", and you again had to really focus to keep your attention on work. Especially now that Sooin was planting thoughts in your head, thoughts that played into your insecurities. You stared at Marissa through the glass of the conference room, as she obliviously typed away at her desk, then glanced over to Younghyun, across the table from you. You were just starting to feel confident in your relationship with him, and now felt like you were rolling back down the other side of the hill you just climbed. Not that you thought he'd cheat on you. You just didn't like the idea of someone else, especially someone pretty who also saw him every day, to be...Oh God, were you turning into a jealous girlfriend? You rubbed your temple and refocused, notes of pricing increases and new employee hiring needing to be in the forefront of your mind. You wondered if Younghyun was having any other similar thoughts, if your relationship was distracting him from work the way it was for you, the way you'd promised yourself it wouldn't...

If you enjoyed this, consider liking, reblogging, replying, or sending an ask (comments and messages provide so much motivation to keep writing!) 💌 Thanks for reading! 💋

[kpopjust4u]

Kinkmas - Day 6: Edging W/ Young K

Post Date: 6th December 2022 Content: Smut - Day6 Young K x Reader WC: 1.1K TW?: Edging/ Teasing/ Fingering/ Oral (Recieving)/ Brian is a TEASE Summary: When drinking hot chocolate whilst watching Christmas movies turns into something else that would make Santa blush.

Masterlist               Kinkmas Masterlist                     Prompt list

Oh, how comfortable you were, cuddled up on the couch whilst you wait for Brian to finish making you his special hot chocolates that you have become obsessed with. Getting him to make them almost every day since the start of November whilst being in a jolly mood as the countdown to Christmas officially started. 

“Here’s your hot chocolate, baby,” Brian cheers as he carefully passes you your hot chocolate, grabbing it from him with sweater paws from your hoodie, smiling sweetly up at him as he places his on the table to take a seat next to you, pulling your legs over his lap. 

Oh and how perfect it was, decorated with whipped cream and sprinkles, combined with the glittering lights surrounding you as the movie is ready to be played. Both of you were right in your element, the scent of the cinnamon sprinkled on your hot chocolate filling your nostrils delightfully. 

The cinnamon wasn’t the only thing that was delightful, you couldn’t give an answer to the question of why you suddenly got distracted away from the movie, but with his lips molding against yours, you really couldn’t complain in the slightest. 

Your hoodie flies from over your head to the floor, an item of clothing from you both joining it in turn as you fight against each other, the movie just being there for background noise at this point. Your warm, bare bodies flush against each other as he pulls you underneath him.

Your fingertips dig into the flesh on his shoulders as he pins down your hips to the couch, your tongues fighting against each other, leaving no time or room to catch a breath as one thing goes to another. 

Taking his bottom lip between your teeth, you tug on it slightly as you giggle, watching his eyes turn dark with lust, with a smirk growing on his face.

“Oh, you’re going to be like that now are you?” He asks as he lifts himself off you slightly, leaving the slightly cold air to attack your half-naked body. 

The cold air makes you shiver, but that isn’t the only thing to do so, the way his finger trails down your jawline, down your neck, and down to your torso makes your skin rise with goosebumps, making you pant and quiver at his touch.

He teases his fingers around the cup of your bra, playfully tugging at it as he carefully watches your eyes that follow his finger, biting down hard on your lip as he does so. 

Then the bra was off, with one swift movement using his other hand to reach around to unclasp it, peeling it off of you painfully slow as you have to wait for him to do something else.

Everything he’s doing is slow yet every fiber in your body ached with admiration at how much he wanted to enjoy just looking at you, wanting to be sweet about it as his lips plant the softest peppering kisses along your shoulders down to your sternum. 

Though you start to get slightly impatient, needing something more than just being kissed all over despite loving every second, the way it’s taking what feels like forever to get to your needs. Your fingers tangle in his hair as you give it a gentle tug, teasing him as he continues to pepper your skin with the most satisfying kisses. 

“Oh, you really are going to be like that huh? Let’s see how you cope with this,” he scoffs against your skin, lifting his head up to look at you with the most mischievous grin that you’ve seen, on pins with anticipation with his statement.

The light touches continue, but his fingertips makes your hair stand up straight as he inches closer to where you desired to be touched the most, tugging at the band of your underwear and of course, pulling them teasingly slow too. 

Lowering himself, his lips pepper the insides of your thighs, his fingers circling your sensitive skin on the other thigh, alternating the kisses and slight touches.

Until the scent of you fills his nostrils, being unable to resist diving straight in, a long lick up your core making you whimper as you try to keep your legs open so you didn’t trap him between your thighs. 

Looking up to see your reaction, he breathes heavily against your soaking core, making you moan at the sensation. 

The small whimpering cries that flow out of your mouth encourage him to keep going, his tongue doing wonders around your sensitive clit as his fingers make their way into your hole, curling them upwards just as you like it.

Then within minutes, you were so close to your breaking point, unable to control your legs as they start to quiver by his ears, and then nothing. He pulls away, chin covered in your slick as you give him a huge whine, unable to put words together to ask him to keep going. 

“Oh, I’m sorry baby. Were you just about to cum? Such a shame,” his cocky teasing tone playing with your mind, knowing that he was purposely doing this but all you could do was whine at him, pouting as you hope he’ll let you have your release. 

His tongue may not be against your core, but his fingers still caress your insides, moving slowly like he has been doing, giving you barely an ounce of satisfaction, then giving you a little hope when he picks it up again, his thumb brushing then doing digits on your clit.

Your back arches as he does this, making you whimper on his lips, tasting yourself on them as you try to make out with him whilst his fingers do the magic work between your legs. 

Then he stops again.

And again.

And again. 

Each time he could tell you were close, he’d stop for minutes at a time, noticing how worked up you were getting, tears pooling in your eyes, making them glassy as you beg on his lips, for him to let you have just one release, just the one. 

“Oh you poor thing,” he coos mockingly, using his free hand to caress your cheek, wiping away the tear from your eyes as it falls, pouting at you by also mocking you, “I’ll let you cum, don’t worry”.

The swiftness in the way he removes his boxers, joining the clothes pile on the floor, to the way he lines himself up to your entrance, makes your heart and core flutter like mad.

“If you want to cum, I’ll make you cum....” he grunts as he thrusts into you slowly, smirking on his lips as they brush against yours, then leaning into your ear, “But you may not handle how many times I’ll make you”. 

~

Tags: @scuzmunkie, @ateezreactionsandscenarios, @trashlord-007, @fanfictrashlord-007

[brianskangs]

YOUNG K "DJ of the Year Award" (DAY6's Kiss the Radio) 2023 KBS Entertainment Awards

[maxsix]

Can you make a post of the boy group music you're listening to at the moment? Like your girl group post.

Right now, I'm listening to:

NCT Cinematic Universe And All Adjacent Subsidiaries: HRH Limitless, ISTJ, 90s Love , Love Talk, Domino

Ateez: Silver Light, Cyberpunk, Halazia, HRH Answer

TXT: Chasing That Feeling (Eng), Loser=Lover, Lovesong (pH-1 version), Ring, sorry the new songs can't beat my favourites

Big Bang: Monster, Bae Bae, Crooked

Enhypen: TFW, Drunk-Dazed

TBZ: Maverick

Ghost (Non Kpop): Mary On A Cross (live)

Jungkook: 3D (Alt), Standing Next To You

Monsta X: Rush Hour, One Day, Got My Number

HRH Taemin: Guilty, Advice, Under My Skin

DPR IAN: So Beautiful

Mino: Fear, Runaway, Body, Shoot

EXO: HRH Overdose, Monster, Obsession

Day6: Congratulations (Eng), Shoot Me, Sweet Chaos, The Greatest

IKON: HRH Just Go, I'm Ok, Goodbye Road

SuperM: Tiger Inside

Shinee: Don't Call Me, Hard

VIXX: HRH Error, Light Up The Darkness, Beautiful Liar

Sik-K: HRH Fire

Changmo: Maestro

[tafeekafee]

About me

Hello there^^

You can call me tafee! It’s actually a mix out of my real name and the German word for fairy (Fee) so take a guess where my fairy emoji stems from:)

You can also find me on ao3 (tafeekafee) where I posted some ATEEZ fics. Maybe one day I’ll transfer them here. Let me know if that is easier!

You can find my masterlist here:

Masterlist tafeekafee

REQUESTS

Please send some requests or (personal) questions or whatever you like! I am a pretty open person and am happy to share stuff about my writing process or things about myself or whatever you would like to know😊

I love to have a full inbox and I promise at one point I will definitely get to the fics!

I currently feel most comfortable writing ATEEZ and THE ROSE though if inspiration strikes I might get back into writing STRAY KIDS more often. I may post some SEVENTEEN stuff in some time.

Honestly I don’t know how to specify what I write – it really depends on the requests. Worst case scenario is that I thank you for the requests and will kindly tell you ‘no, I can’t’ or refer you to a different blog! For each group check out the members I will write for below – members in (brackets) will probably only appear as sickies if you request them!

If you want to know about me feel free to ask but for now let me tell you a bit about myself:

I am from Germany and was born in 2001

I have only been a K-Pop fan since early 2023 when I accidentally stumbled upon a Stray Kids sickfic on ao3

I switched to tumblr now because a) some friends have my ao3 and I feel weird posting there and b) the K-Pop community is more active here and I feel so thankful for every like and comment and interaction I receive here since it doesn’t feel like I am writing into the void now <3

I honestly love talking about my interests so hit me up in the chat or asks

I am currently writing my thesis in Theology (though I didn’t study theology, if you are interested how that came to happen, ask XD) so I might drop off the face of earth spontaneously if I don’t focus more on that soon…

🧭 STRAY KIDS

are my first K-Pop love

my favorite songs are: Hellevator, Thunderous, #LoveStay, Fam and Lonely St.

my biases are: Lee Know and Seungmin

will write for: Lee Know, (Hyunjin) and Seungmin

⌛ ATEEZ

I discovered ATEEZ through Kingdom: Legendary War and fell in love with their concept and Hongjoong’s long hair lol

my favorite songs are: Star 1117, Wonderland (Symphony No. 9), The Leaders, MATZ and Not Okay

my biases are: Hongjoong (ult. Bias), Jongho and Yunho

will write for: Hongjoong, Seonghwa, Yunho, (Yeosang), San, (Wooyoung) and Jongho

🌹 THE ROSE

I know they aren’t really K-Pop but I adore them and their music so much I went to two concerts (drove 2 and 4 hours respectively) ad got up at 3AM for the Coachella livestreams

my favorite songs are: Sorry, Cosmo, Eclipse, Back to Me and She’s in the Rain (it was so hard to decide, they are all so good!)

my bias is: Hajoon

will write for: all of them

I occasionally listen to Day6 (Zombie, Congratulations and Love me or Leave me) and BtoB (Beautiful Pain, Pray and The Song).

I am currently slipping into Diamond Life especially since I will get to see SEVENTEEN (Trauma, Circles and Monster) at Lollapalooza in Berlin. I am already so excited!!!

IN PROCESS

⌛ ATEEZ:

Yeosang: Sick before a concert (slight Angst)

Seonghwa: Stomach flu

San: Appendicitis

Hongjoong: Sick at Coachella

Yunho: Fever at Night (request)

???: Domestic sickfic

Headcanons: Sick but not sick enough to stay home (request)

Headcanons: Headaches & Migraines (request)

🧭 Stray Kids:

/

🌹 The Rose:

Hajoon: Insecure series

Hajoon: Sick alone

Hajoon: Sick during Q&A + concert

Headcanons: Sick but not sick enough to stay home (request)

❔️??? - Dialogue prompts

"Hyung, can you come and get me, please?"

Warnings and disclaimer below cut

I am very reluctant to assume anything about our favourite idols. However, in my writings – though I do my best to stay as true to their personalities and characteristics as possible - I think of them of "just another character" not a reflection of the real person. Remember that nothing they think, do or say in fanfictions might be what the actually would think, do or say. Remember that these fanfictions are fictional works and do not reflect the real-life idols.

[happilychaengs]

hii, i have a request...could you please write a nayeon x fem! angst that's inspired by the song 'like a flowing wind' by day6 ??

-🦌

honestly i'm kind of ashamed i haven't heard this song before but i started listening to this on loop so... yeah. anyways i was racking my brain for this so i hope you enjoy!

-r

nayeon - like a flowing wind

word count: 716

nayeon x gender neutral reader

In the end, I think this is the end

결국 여기까지가 끝인 것 같아

I have to accept it now

이젠 받아들여야 해

because I tried so hard

너무나도 노력했기에

it must be so hard

이렇게 힘든가 봐

It won't be easy

쉽지는 않겠지만

I will let you go bluntly

덤덤하게 너를 보낼 거라

these were the first lyrics that popped up for me so i just chose this

you put the phone up to your ear as she picked up.

"y/n? what's wrong?"

"nothing nay. i just to talk and also i wanted to know if you wanted to go-"

"yeah jihyo?" you heard her shout over the line. then there was someone else shouting back, presumably the leader herself. she let out another sigh as she apologized to you, "i'm sorry y/n, i have to go. I'll call you back." then she hung up.

you let out a breathy sigh as you looked down at her contact name. 'my only one'.

hours passed. unsurprisingly, she hasn't gotten back to you with anything. a text. a call. any sign she cared enough. you just gave up on it as you made your way to bed. you decided to wait this time.

almost always she comes back at 2 am in the morning. always busy. you sat in your bed as you watched the door aimlessly, waiting for her to appear and just on time she does.

"y/n?" she sounded surprised to see you up, waiting for her. "why are you up?"

"nothing." you gave her a small smile, "i just missed you."

"oh. well i missed you too." she nonchalantly replied as she put her bag down and got into bed. as she laid down, you tried wrapping your arms around her stomach like you used to in the past. she had always said ending the day with your warmth was enough for her to get by.

but maybe she was lying right straight through her teeth. she peeled your arms away as she turned her back to you. "not now. i'm tired y/n. good night."

"oh... okay. good night."

and not before long, you could hear her light snores. that was enough of a signal for you to crawl your way out of bed and away from her. you were losing her. you knew. you've tried so hard. so hard to make this work. to make her happy but you knew that it'd all end soon enough.

maybe if you had stopped trying long ago, you wouldn't be feeling like this. like you have this gaping hole in your heart that's missing something. nayeon was the best thing you could ask for. seriously she was. and yet she felt like the worst thing to happen in your life. she was slipping through your fingers by the second and yet you thought it was fine to let it stay this way. it was foolish really.

you've almost convinced yourself that if you loved her hard enough, it'd be okay. you'd still be happy.

you decided to sleep on the couch tonight. away from her and as a new day came around again, you felt exactly the same. you watched as nayeon came down the stairs, glancing over at you and then just walking out the door with nothing to say. you wanted to tell her to stay for just one day for you. take a break. but you knew you'd be wrong to be so selfish.

you should stop this. you thought. it'll only hurt for a while, right? and it'd be easier for her, right? almost an hour passed of you weighing your options. to stay and be miserable or to leave her and make it easier for you both. you decided to choose the latter.

you scrambled around your house for a pen and paper to just write down everything. your final words to nayeon before you'd let her go and how you truly felt. by the time nayeon got back, she called out for you, not seeing a single sign you were home. "y/n?"

as she looked around, your clothes from the closet were gone. any sign that a person besides her lived here was gone. she grew more worried as she spotted a folded up sheet of paper on the bedside table. her brows knitted together as she slowly walked over and unfolded it.

as she skimmed it, she could tell it was your writing. the letter almost seemed incomprehensible in her current state. where did you go? where were you?

but it all became clear soon enough. tears stained the paper in her hands as she stood there reading the last line.

i'm letting you go.

[bambheez]

about me: cat. 23. she/her. isfp.

stan list: enhypen (heeseung), nct (mark, xiaojun, renjun), bts, exo (yixing), day6 (youngk), monsta x (changkyun), txt (soobin), svt (minghao), le sserafim (yunjin, eunchae), ive (liz, rei, gaeul), aespa (ningning), newjeans (hanni, danielle), twice, stayc (yoon, sieun, seeun), woodz, lee hi

rules/byf: i write (mostly) nsfw content for enhypen’s hyung line only. MDNI. i do not engage in hard hours. i block blank blogs (ones that look like a bot). requests and inbox are always open.

FIC RECS

MASTERLIST

© 2023, bambheez | tumblr

you do NOT have any permission to copy, translate, rewrite, or repost my works on tumblr or on any other platform.

[write-now-ggs]

Wendy (Red Velvet)

Wc - 11,200

song

"Eye Catching"

You were on your way to the venue where you were to host for a very popular groups comeback special. It was a two day special and today was the first day you would be meeting the group, you were nervous but you've hosted probably more than hundreds of specials and shows in general. But something about meeting Red Velvet had made you nervous, very nervous. You weren't even this nervous when it came to meeting EXID. You were even more nervous than when it came to meeting Taeyeon. Red Velvet just had something about them that made you nervous.

_

As a young kid you moved to Korea as a big decision of your dad's job. To be fairly honest, you were grateful for the opportunity given to you because of this tough decision. Soon feeling right at home whenever you got to spend time with your neighbors, who to you were more like grandparents. You honestly couldn't think of anywhere else as home as long as they were around for you. It was a great experience that you were grateful for. It wasn't until High School though when you learned what your biggest passion would be. You had joined your school's broadcasting club, this right here was your calling. You didn't know if it was the feeling you got everytime you were out and about interviewing people, or being able to spread information over the masses that made you feel like you finally found your calling. Throughout High School you would sign up for any hosting gigs to try and get some experience for later on down your, hopefully, future career.

Then came college. Here it got crazy with the amount of chances there was to host something. Literally anything you could think of. From hosting games to assembly's, the possibilities were endless. But that was just a small bite into what you were craving. You wanted to be able to host huge events, interview people, and just interact with a whole different side of an industry that you hadn't experienced yet.

Then one lucky day came. Your college was having a festival where some rookie idol groups were to be performing. It was 2015 and you remembered all the flyers posted around campus. "Lovelyz, Mamamoo, Red Velvet and More to perform! Get ready!!" The club you were apart of was in charge of helping put the festival together. You didn't want this festival to be like every typical college festival you wanted things to be vastly different than the usual festivals you were sure these idols had been too. You wanted to add some mini games for them on stage so they would interact with their fans and they could, hopefully, relieve some stress.

The festival was going to run all day until late at night and you were the one in charge of MCing for the entire day. Everyone in your club had voted for you, specifically, to be in charge. You were nervous since the language was still a little challenging at times but at the same time you were excited. This was just the right thing you were looking for and you couldn't have been more grateful to everyone in your club.

Unfortunately not everything was going to be smooth sailing.. Terrible news arrived that Red velvet, one of the nights main acts, weren't going to be able to attend.

"What are we going to do? the posters have already been everywhere and today is literally the only day we have left. We can't find anyone to perform on such a short notice?" Your clubs leader, Hayoon, yelled as she paced back and forth.

"What other groups are performing?" One of the members had asked, you were too busy thinking to look at who asked.

"Lovelyz, Mamamoo, Got7, Oh My Girl, Day6, Sonamoo, ClC and we have Suran and Heize coming. But now we have an Hour gap of when Red Velvet was supposed to perform. What are we going to do!?" Hayoon was looking through the stacks of paper with the information and contracts of the festival.

Finally after thinking as hard as you could, you spoke up with an idea that would hopefully save the festival.

"Hey what if we add an event where we draw some members of the crowd and the groups to have like a little dance contest kind of thing for a prize. Like we pair a member of each group up with a member of the crowd to perform a short dance for a prize. I'm sure we can make that take over the spot for red velvet, and plus it'll make some memories for some lucky fans." You said with a small smile as you tried demonstrating what you were thinking with your hands, which was a bad habit you had.

Hayoon looked at you while she was trying to work everything out in her head, "You know what, I actually don't hate that idea. But what kind of prize should we give out?"

"A signed album from each group?" You said with some uncertainty. "Oh! And I Know someone who makes custom clothes, we could get a first though third place prize of a jacket with our schools name and logo on it. We can have the name of the festival on the back with the place they won for both the singer and the crowd member."

"Alright I'm sure that will do. Are you sure the jackets will be done in time..?" Hayoon smiled after you gave her a confident nod, "And this is why you're hosting this event, thank you."

"It's no problem, I'll go out tonight and try finding an album of each of the groups. I can call my friend as soon as this meeting is over. I'm certain everything will be done before the competition starts. We'll meet up tomorrow morning when everything should hopefully be set up." You told her with a small smile.

And so the event turned out fine. It was actually better than fine. The event did amazingly well, so well in fact that more and more people had shown up in the middle and towards the end of the festival. Even people who didn't attend your University showed up. It was a crazy experience you were glad to be a part of and an experience you were always going to treasure.

The dance competition did even better than anyone could have ever expected. The winners ended up being Moonbyul from Mamamoo and a girl from the crowd, rightfully so as they went out and put on a show. The competition had almost everyone in the crowd cracking up in laughter, the Got7 boys working their charm on the crowd as they constantly tried to win everyone over in favor of Jackson and the young man he was paired up with. Bam Bam going as far as to yell out that he would marry everyone that voted for Jackson.

This festival was not only a big part in your future career but also a huge part in these idols careers.

People not only instantly fell in love with all the groups and idols that participated in the competition, but they were all amazed at the way you handled things. Immediately after your name was heard all throughout campus and all over the internet. People wanted more of you and your magic way of words that hooked people on to whatever you said.

A few days had passed since the event took place and you were contacted by a company that had offered you a contract to sign with them and in return they would have someone in charge of organizing all of your gigs and to give you a bigger spot light.

You were pretty overwhelmed to say the least since you were sure there were other people out there who were better than you and that were actually born here, not just some random foreigner who managed to do one good thing. You just went ahead and signed to them because c'mon you could do with some extra cash and guidance, not exactly sure of the opportunities this decision soon opened up for you. It was actually insane how quickly everything after that changed. Back to back you had gigs lined up for literally anything. After a few videos and articles of the festival were posted you were a pretty hot topic when it came to MCing for events, big and small. This was something you really never thought was possible, but there you were some random young University student with a bad habit of demonstrating everything with their hands in the same league as people who you thought were way more professional. People who had been working in this field for longer than you had discovered this passion.

Your first really big huge event after the festival was a launch for a highly anticipated computer game. Now you thought since it was just a launch for an online game it would be quick and easy. but oh boy were you wrong. This launch we being streamed everywhere by gamers who had anticipated this very moment for over a few years, this game was one of the most anticipated at the time. To be quite honest you weren't as nervous as you thought you would have been.

And slowly after that you ended up building such a wonderful reputation that you often were on national television. It was crazy to think how this all started thanks to one festival where you were sure everything was going to crash and burn.

It wasn't until late 2016 that you would step into the entertainment industry once again. A new idol group was set to debut and for their first show case you were asked to be the host. Nerves ran through your entire body worse than ever before, this Girl Group was one of the hottest topics in terms of new groups. When anyone talked about a new group, they were always in the discussion. You had to make sure you did a great job... You didn't do a great job, you did an excellent job at the showcase. The group instantly took over every chart they had their eyes on since that night.

From then on you became a staple in the industry for debut show cases. Many believe it's a curse for a group to fail their comeback if you didn't host their showcase. So to put it simple, you were a busy busy person, But it was something you loved doing to the point it didn't feel like you were busy, just enjoying the moment. Hell you even got to travel overseas for hosting events for some companies you didn't even think knew you existed.

You were also very popular for international fans because of the way you treated their favorite artist and the questions you focused on. You never asked about their "Ideal type" or "love life" instead you always focused on the project at hand. You would ask who helped with what and just try and get some information about the process of everything that was put into whatever they did. And fans really appreciated that since it gave them some insight on just how hard their artist worked instead of the usual cringey interviews they would get, especially on variety shows.

~

So there you were getting driven to the venue for Red Velvets Showcase for what they claimed would be their best comeback ever, which is why SM put so much money into this showcase. Outside of the venue it was insanely packed with fans just hoping to get some kind of glimpse at the five beautiful talented artist they adored. It was adorable how excited some of them were.

You rolled your window down to take a video of then when an idea suddenly popped up in your head for the interview. When some fans saw you recording they all started waving and screaming all of the members names. It was insane but cute at the same time.

After you felt like you captured enough footage you rolled your window back up and watched as you were pulled up into the parking lot.

The event wouldn't start for another couple of hours, which made it even crazier to think that those fans would wait out there until it was time.

You walked inside the building and quickly met up with all the people in charge of the event and told them your idea from earlier. They quickly agreed then you were ushered off to meet the girls for a "sneek peak" interview into the event.

You got fixed up then you were showed into a room off in the back where it was quieter. It was set up nicely with a beautiful backdrop of the night sky.

You sat patiently going over everything while the cameras got set up. You held you smile in your hand as you warmed your voice up. There was a long few hours of talking ahead for you and you wanted your throat to be prepared. You were taking a drink of some nice warm tea when the door opened and the five young women walked in, smiles pasted on all their faces as they greeted all of the staff.

You were instantly stunned by the beauty that instantly took over the room. Their smiles were the first thing you noticed, they were incredible. The energy they emitted in the small room made you feel like this was the first ever interview you took part of.

They each walked up to you and individually introduced themselves before taking the seat they felt the most comfortable with.

You were on the left in a single seat followed by a small space then it was Wendy, Irene and Seulgi on the bottom row. In the top row with the taller seats was Yeri and Joy.

They were talking among themselves as everything got checked before the cameras started to roll.

You looked at all of them, then you looked at Wendy, she was looking right back at you with a big smile. You smiled back then checked the cards in your hands.

After the camera director told you everything was ready, they started recording. After giving him a small nod your work persona instantly took over, starting off with a big smile you started your rehearsed introduction.

"Hello everyone, I'm here with Red Velvet moments before their big showcase, How are you each currently feeling..?"

"Oh um wow, well we feel nervous of course but at the same time we're excited. This is something we've never really done before and it's a concept I hope many of our fans are anticipating." Wendy spoke like a very well rehearsed professional, as she avoided making any form of eye contact with you and just stared at the camera.

"Yes just like Wendy said, we're extremely nervous but at the same time we know we put a lot of hard work into this album so I hope our Reveluvs like it a lot because we wouldn't work this hard on something if we didn't think they would like it." Irene said as she looked into the camera with a smile.

"I mean every song and album you guys have come out with had been amazing, so to you, what makes this one so special?" You asked again looking at Irene for an answer.

"Well during creating process each member got to help with some form of the production of at least two or more songs on the album so I just feel like with all of our personal touches in the songs we hope our fans can see another side of us. And this is also a project we've worked so hard on for almost a year. It's kind of a special gift to our fans." Irene answered again in her almost too perfect, professional voice.

"Okay so you mentioned that each member helped with a form of production, do you think you can tell us what exactly each of you did..?" You motioned to all of them with a smile.

Instead of Irene it was Wendy who answered, "We really wish we could but we kind of want to see if our fans can figure it out"

"Kind of like a treasure hunt!!" Seulgi added in with a smile.

"Well for this "treasure hunt" will there be any kind of prize for a special fan that figures it out?" You asked Seulgi with a smile.

"That's also a secret" Joy chimed in with a smile.

This interview was pretty different. You had always managed to squeeze out information no one else could very easily but these girls had a way of shutting you down.

"Okay well moving on from the musical side of things, since we will talk about that more on depth later on at the showcase, what can we expect from the choreography..?" You asked Seulgi.

Seulgi looked at Irene, almost as if she needed reassurance to make sure that what she was going to say was okay. Irene nodded her head slightly and Seulgi smiled. "Well like the album, each member got to add their own touches to the dance. Kind of in a way to highlight what makes each of us special to the group."

"Well each of you are very special to the group with your own charms so which points did you try and high light in the dance.?" You smiled to yourself knowing this question would at least help satisfy some eager fans who couldn't wait.

"Well with me I would say it's my voice so there's a move I chose to add where i-" Wendy got cut off by Irene putting her hand over her mouth.

"I'm sorry you and the rest of out fans will have to wait for the actual comeback to know." She smiled then looked at Wendy giving her a 'what are you doing' kind of look.

"I'm sorry she distracted me I forgot we weren't supposed to say it." Wendy whispered to Irene quietly, but you managed to hear it.

"Okay well I'm sorry to all the 'Revluvs'" You looked at the girls to make sure you got their fandom's name right, "Out there but its pretty hard to pry information out of them. I guess we will all have to wait until the comeback to see the magic in it's true works." You looked at the girls and smiled, "Is there anything you would like to tell your fans..?"

"Ah yes" Yeri chimed in. You nodded at her to continue, "My dance is totally better than Joys, that's all you need to know!" She smiled and then looked at Joy.

"Hey, it is not! My dance is way cooler than yours!" Joy looked at Yeri.

"Do you want to show us..? I'm sure your fans can decide on that" You smiled as you tried your best to get them to give some kind of preview.

"Sorry we're not Wendy you can't distract us cause we don't have a crush on you!" Yeri said then stuck her tounge out cockily.

Joy lightly smacked the back of Yeris head and Wendy had completely turned red.

"Um" You looked at the camera and smiled. "Well I guess we can wrap this up here, right?" You asked the camera director.

He nodded at you and you sighed.

"Alright well this has been fun, and I'm sorry guys that I couldn't pry information out of them as easily as my other victims" You smiled as you thought about how many comeback details you were able to pry out of other idols, especially Twice they were like an open book. "But that just means I have to come up with a better method, I'll see you guys at the showcase" you looked at red velvet, "And I'll see you there too."

Red velvet said something to the camera each, for their fans, then the interview was over.

"Alright, well thank you ladies for letting me interview you, I'll see you in a couple hours" You stood up and smiled at them.

You walked over to some of the staff and handed them the cards you had, not like you looked at them but still, it was nice to have a reference for questions. You talked to the director about which parts to cut out, especially Yeri's little sentence at the end of the entregues as You were sure she had worded what she ment wrong.

You felt a tap on your shoulder and smiled when you saw Seulgi. "Yes?"

"Wen- I mean, my members wanted me to invite you to our dressing room so we can hang out for a little before the showcase, something about wanting each other to feel more comfortable with one another on stage." Seulgi smiled as she spoke.

"oh um yeah that sounds like a good idea, a little friendly chemistry could hurt" You smiled back at Seulgi, "I just need to go find my manager to talk to him about something but I'll be there soon."

"Okay!" Seulgi giggled then walked out to join the other girls.

_

"Wendy!! She said she'll come!" Seulgi yelled when she walked in the dressing room.

"I've never seen her cheeks get that red!" Yeri teased.

"Hey shut up it's just really hot in here" Wendy rolled her eyes.

"Really..? I'm cold" Irene said as she waddled up to the girls with a blanket wrapped around her.

"Wendy you must really have a big crush on her, you haven't even spoken a word to her off camera but she has you wrapped around her finger." Joy laughed as she twirled a piece of hair on her finger.

"Shut up I don't have a crush on her. Okay..?" Wendy said as she looked down with her arms crossed.

"Sure, it's not like you watch literally every single interview she conducts. You even watched her commercial for some toilet paper brand about a hundred times." Yeri pulled her phone out and looked something up.

"Shut up, I Did Not!" Wendy glared at Yeri meanwhile Yeri smiled as she played the commercial out loud. Wendy knew the commercial word by word but she wouldn't admit it. Especially to Yeri.

"How do you even have a crush on her. You hevent ever talked to her you little chicken shit" Joy laughed at the look on Wendy's face.

"Joy! Language" Irene scowled from her spot on the couch.

"Yes grandma Rene I'll watch my language" Joy laughed again when Irene rolled her eyes.

"I think it's cute!" Seulgi chimed in about Wendy's crush.

"You think anything is cute" Yeri told her.

"Okay true, but c'mon you have to admit that we've never seen Wendy this flustered." Seulgi said as she walked up to Wendy to poke her cheek.

"I'm not flustered I'm jus-"

There was a knock at the door that interrupted wendy mid sentence and caused the entire room to fall silent, "Hello..?" Your voice drifted its way into the room, slightly muffled by the door sperating you and the girls.

Joy pulled Wendy up and pushed her towards the door. "Open it you coward" Joy whispered.

"C-coming" Wendy said as she tried to catch her balance.

Yeri secretly recorded Wendy to have something to tease her about in the future.

Wendy opened the door and smiled shyly at you, "Yes..?" She looked at the box in your hands then back up at your face.

"Oh Hi, Wendy..?" You said raising your eyebrow to make sure you got her name right. You continued speaking when she gave you a small nod, "Um Seulgi asked me to come over here, so.."

"Oh yeah of course" Wendy tried opening the door but it hit her foot at first. "Ouch" She moved out of the way to open it correctly, "Come in"

"Thank you" You smiled then walked in. "Hi" You told the rest of the girls in the room.

"Hi!" They all said back.

"Ooh, What's in the box?" Yeri asked as Wendy quietly walked past you to sit down.

"Oh I brought some chocolates that I made yesterday" You smiled and handed her the box. "I Always make extra so I can bring some for the staff and if there's still some more I usually give them to whoever's fans are still outside at the end of the event. It's a fun hobby of mine, I like making people smile with the idea of food."

Yeri opened the box and Joy gasped, "No way! is this nama chocolate??" She looked at you in surprise.

You smiled and nodded. "Yup I'm kinda going through a Japanese dessert phase right now. My friend just came back from Japan and showed me how to make them"

"Wow awesome" Seulgi said as she walked over to Yeri to look at the chocolate in more detail.

"It looks delicious." Wendy quietly said from her seat.

"Please help yourselves, I have plenty more so don't worry." You smiled at all of them.

"Even the box is so cute. It looks profesional!" Seulgi gushed as she grabbed a chocolate.

You heard your name and looked over at Irene. "Here come sit down" she patted the seat on the couch next to her.

You walked over and sat down in between her and Wendy.

"Oh my god if this isn't the best chocolate I've ever had I don't know what is!" Joy said as she grabbed another piece.

"It's so creamy and delicious. Wow you have some magic hands" Yeri said with a mouthful of chocolate.

"Let me see. Bring me some." Irene said from her spot on the couch.

"Why do I have to get up" Yeri whispered as both Seulgi and Joy nudged her to get up.

"Because you're the youngest and we know grandma's joints aren't the best." Joy whispered back and pushed Yeri.

Yeri brought Irene the box and Irene picked one out. "Mmm this is really good!" Irene said with a hand covering her mouth.

Yeri walked over to Wendy and held the box out to her, wiggling her eyebrows as she glanced between you and Wendy.

After mouthing something to her, Wendy reached out to grab one but Yeri just gave her the whole box. "Here now you have something to fangirl at home about." Yeri said quietly with an innocent smile.

Wendy took the box with red cheeks and she sent Yeri a look that screamed "you're in trouble" .

You looked at Wendy with a big smile, "Try it, let me know what you think."

"Ok" Wendy nodded and she picked out a chocolate, examining it for a small moment as a small smile made its way on her lips. After admiring the gift from you for a few more seconds, she finally plopped it in her mouth "Oh wow" She gasped when she ate it. "It's amazing." She looked at you with wide eyes.

"Thank you" You smiled at her before looking over at the other girls. "I can make some more and send them to you if you would like. We can always arrange a way to get them to you."

"Oh no we don't want to bother you." Irene said as she looked at you.

You shook your head, "It wouldn't be a bother, I like making food for people. It makes me happy"

"Well only if it isn't an inconvenience for you, we will take you up on that offer." Irene agreed with a small nod.

"Yes!" Seulgi yelled from where she was seated, "Free delicious snacks!"

Yeri and Joy exchanged a look before laughing. "Excuse us we need to go get our make up touched up, we will be back in a little bit" Yeri said as she and Joy stood up. Joy sent Wendy a look as they walked to the door.

"We'll see you in a little bit, thanks for the chocolate!" Joy said and Irene just shook her head and looked at Seulgi.

Seulgi got up and walked to the door, lightly nudging Wendy as she walked by behind the couch you were seated on, and excused herself to go get something.

"Oh no did my chocolate give them stomach problems?" You asked Irene.

Irene laughed and shook her head, "No I highly doubt it. Those girls are always up to something."

"Oh okay" You laughed quietly. You looked over at Wendy. "You're not gonna disappear on me too now are you..?" You asked her jokingly.

Wendy shook her head with a small smile. "I don't plan on it."

"Okay good, I was beginning to feel self conscious." You joked with her.

After a small moment of silence in the room Wendy spoke in a soft voice. "I didn't know you were into baking. Well if that's what you call this" She said as she lifted up the box in her hand.

"Oh" You smiled at her, "I didn't know I was either until a few years ago when I made my first cake from scratch."

"Really..? That's so cool" Wendy said. "What flavor was it."

"I was just going to make a chocolate cake but my friend convinced me in to making it a Red Velvet cake." You told her as you pulled your phone out of your pocket to look for the picture you took of it.

There was a quiet snicker from Irene. "Ooh the coincidence" She told herself quietly before getting up. "I have to go do something. I'll be back" She said as she walked out before you or Wendy could say anything.

"I'm into baking too" Wendy said after watching you scroll through your phone in silence as she quietly played with her bracelet.

"Really..?" You looked up at her and smiled, which honestly Wendy was surprised she didn't have a heart attack considering the amount of times you had smiled at her in the past ten minutes. "We should join up one day and bake together." You suggested.

"Oh" Wendy paused and then smiled to herself, "That sounds like fun."

"Ah found it" You said to yourself then you showed Wendy the picture on your phone. "I know it looks bad but trust me it actually didn't taste that bad."

Wendy couldn't hold back the little laugh she had when she saw how smeared and everywhere the frosting was. What she really couldn't keep her eyes off was the way you were smiling as you held the cake to show the camera, flour all over your clothes and frosting somehow managing to end up on your face and hair.

"Are you laughing..?" You asked with a fake gasp.

"I'm" She laughed, "I'm sorry, it's cute. I promise" She smiled at you.

"They've gotten a little better." You said as you pulled a more recent picture up of a three tiered cake you made for a friend's birthday.

"Oh wow that's really nice!" Wendy said as she took your phone in her hands to get a better look.

There was a knock on the door and you heard your name. "Yes?" You called out.

The door opened and your managers head peaked in. "Hey sorry to interrupt, but there's something important we need you for."

"Oh" You nodded your head, "Okay I'll be right there."

"Okay meet us in your room" You manager said before dismissing himself and closing the door.

You stood up and Wendy looked at you. "Heres your phone." She handed you your phone with a slightly disappointed smile.

"Thank you. And as much as I would love to continue to talk to you about dessert, duty calls." You smiled at her as you grabbed your phone.

Wendy stood up and smiled at you. "It's Okay I completely understand. And honestly I should try and go find where the girls went."

You looked around the quiet room and laughed, "Yeah that seems like a good idea. We can continue our conversation at a later time if you would like..?" You asked her.

"Oh yes, yeah totally! I'm always down for talking about baking" She spoke with so much enthusiasm.

"Ah cute" You said to yourself with a small laugh. "It was great talking to you." You held out your hand but shook your head. "Can I give you a hug..?"

"huh, uh" Wendy looked at you.

"Sorry I like giving hugs more than handshakes theyre just better and less awkward in my opinion." You told her.

"Y-yeah that's fine." Wendy smiled.

You gave her a hug, "I'll see you at your showcase."

You walked out to find your manager before you got in trouble for taking too long.

_

One by one the girls all barged into the room after they saw you walk by in the hallway with a smile as you stared at your phone.

The girls all teased Wendy when they saw her standing in the spot you left her with the most love struck look on her face.

"Oh my god what happened?"

"Your Face is so red"

"I think I can hear your heartbeat all the way over here"

"Did you get her number"

"No I didn't get her number, but she offered me to hang out with her to bake together.." Wendy said as she snapped out of her daze.

"Baking together..?" Irene asked her.

"That's like the gayest most adorable thing I've ever heard!!" Yeri yelled as she gave Joy a high five.

"Yes our planned worked.." Joy cheered as she gave Wendy a pat on the back.

"Ooh you had a plan..? I just walked out because I knew Wendy was going to make it awkward." Seulgi said as she grabbed a bag of fruit snacks that were on the table in the middle of the room.

Irene laughed before nodding, "That was a good decision, Wendy did make it awkward. It was adorable but hard to watch." Irene stuck her hand out to Seulgi so she could give her some fruit snacks.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't help but get nervous. Have you seen her..? She's literally perfect." Wendy sat on the couch with a little huff.

"How did you even manage to get a crush on her if you've never even met her before..?" Joy asked as she sat on one of the many chairs in the room.

"Well you see the thing is we have met before, but it was before all this happened. Before she became the huge successful person she is now and before we managed to become who we are right now. It was a long time ago so I doubt she even remembers it, especially with how busy she's been since then." Wendy said as she tapped her fingers on the couch.

"Wait really?? Why did you never tell us this..? And when??" Joy sat up so she could hear whatever wendy was going to say next more clearer.

"Well it was back in 2015 at the end of spring, beginning of summer. I had gone with our manager at the time to go talk to a few universities about performing at their festivals but none of them really caught our attention. Until we went to the school she was from. While we were there talking to her and taking a tour of the school, she explained everything to us with just the biggest and most beautiful smile I'd ever seen. She was constantly asking us if we needed to take a break from walking or if we were thirsty. She was just constantly making sure we were okay." Wendy looked to the side as a small smile had made its way up on her lips while she remembered the past. "So then we had agreed to participate at the festival and she thanked us so much I thought my heart was going to burst."

"Wait but I don't remember performing at any festivals at that time..?" Irene said as she racked her memory for what they did during the specified time period Wendy mentioned.

"Exactly, we never ended up going." Wendy's smile disappeared. "It honestly broke my heart because she was so excited for us to go but then we couldn't anymore. It was hard but I kept telling myself that I'd never see her again so there was no reason to feel guilty." She let out a small laugh, "Oh but how the universe has its way of letting life play out. After the day of her universities festival her face was all over social media. She had become a hot topic all over every platform. It was insane."

"And that's how she's become who she is now.." Yeri mumbled once she finally understood everything.

"Correct." Wendy nodded before taking in a sharp breathe of air, "That damn smile of hers still managed to find it's way into my mind at random times."

"Wow how did we never know this..?" Seulgi asked as she looked at all the other girls in the room.

"I never told anyone because I thought we would never cross paths in life again, I guess I was wrong." Wendy told all of them as she looked down at the ground.

"Wrong doesn't even begin to describe it, she's literally worked with almost all the top girl groups in our industry, did you just think she was gonna just skip right past us..?" Joy told Wendy as she made a not so nice gesture to show her how much of an idiot she was.

"I honestly don't know what I thought, I guess I was kinda just hoping she would skip over us." Wendy admitted before standing up.

"Wow I've never seen you so flustered over just one person before," Irene told her as she gave her a small pat on the shoulder.

"I don't know what's going on with me." Wendy sighed as she shook her head. "I'm gonna go outside for a bit, I need some fresh air."

"Okay, just take your phone, we'll call you when you need to come back." Irene told her as she handed her her phone she left on the couch.

"Alright, thanks." Wendy gave her a small smile as she took her phone. "See you in a little bit." She waved to all the girls before leaving out of the room.

"Wow.." All three of the girls mumbled at the same time.

_

Wendy wandered the hallways of the Venue for a while before finding a door to the outside. Stepping out into the fresh air, she took a deep breathe and smiled. She walked around outside to look for a place to sit down and that's when she saw you out there watching something on your phone. She didn't know wether or not she should go up and say something, but luckily for her the ringing of your phone took all of you attention as she just stood back and watched.

"Hello..? Yeah what do you want this time..? Huh..? Yeah it's Red Velvet this time, what..? No I'm not getting them to sign anything for you, what..? No, aren't you supposed to be studying right now..? Wait what time is it there..? Why are you still awake, our parents didn't send you back to America just for you to goof off instead of studying. Huh..? ugh fine then I'll talk to you for just five more minutes. Who, Irene..? Ah the short one, you want her to sign something for you..? Well do you remember what I told you when you asked for a twice member to sign something, yup my answer is the same. No. Huh..? Which one caught my eye, hmm.. What do you mean there has to be at least one I like, you're such an idiot. I'm working, I'm not here to oogle at pretty women. But I hate to admit that you are right, yeah can you guess which one. Yeah you're right, she has a nice voice. Yes of course she's pretty too. Uh-huh, okay well at least try and get some sleep, don't you have exams next week..? okay well if you don't do well I'm not gonna let you come visit. Okay, alright then you little butthole. Go to sleep, okay, bye."

Wendy just stared in awe, she'd heard you speak English before in almost all of your interviews but to hear you drop the professional tone and just speak naturally was amusing to her. She hated to admit it but she found it oddly attractive.

You went back to watching whatever video you had playing before your younger sibling had called.

"Just do it, don't be a chicken.." Wendy mumbled before getting the courage to walk up to you. She took a few steps closer to you before clearing her throat to get your attention.

You jumped up in shock before looking up and immediately making eye contact with the short haired woman in front of you. "Oh, Wendy, hello.." You smiled at her in an attempt to hide the fact that she startled you.

"Hello.." You said awkwardly as she didn't know what else to say, luckily you took control over the conversation.

"What brings you outside..?" You asked before pausing, you then continued to talk when she continued to only stare. "Ah I know what it is," you gestured to the phone in her hand, "I've been to this venue a bunch of times and the service inside can be pretty spotty at times. Out here is where you get the best service." You lifted your previously abandoned phone in the air to show her.

"Oh, right haha" She mumbled awkwardly.

You moved over on the concrete ledge you were sitting on, it was surrounding a beautiful tree they had outside for decoration, and patted the spot next to you. "You can sit right here, I don't bite."

After giving you a small nod she moved to down next to you. "What are you watching..?"

"Hmm..?" You looked down at your phone then back up at her, "Don't laugh, I'm just watching some baking videos.."

"Oh really..? And why would I laugh, I do that all the time." She answered with a small smile.

"There's this channel called Cooking Tree and I just really love their videos." You turned your phone to the side so she could see what you were watching.

"What are they making..?" She asked as she moved closer to see better.

"They're making a Cream Puff Cake, it looked good on the picture of the thumbnail." You held your phone more in the middle of the both of you, that way you could both get a better view.

The two of you sat there for a while just watching a few more videos and talking about the things you've both made in the past.

"Hmm, you seem to know a lot about baking." You told Wendy as you turned you phone off since it was about time for you to head inside.

"Yeah it's something I really like a lot, it's a lot of work but the end product is always worth it." she answered with a smile.

"Oh yeah trust me, I know all about that." You returned her smile before humming, "Hmm you know what, if you ever want to come over to bake together," You paused before adding, "Or just bake by yourself, let me know."

"Come over to where..?" Her head tilted to the left as she watched you stand up.

"My house, like around two years ago I turned one of the spare bed rooms into my own at home baking studio. It took a lot of work, but I hired some great people so it is amazing. You're free to come by anytime." You watched the way she smiled and continued, "Of course I know it sounds odd for me to be inviting you over to my house to bake even though we just met, but I have a few other people I met at jobs like these that come over to hang out and bake."

"Really..? Like who..?"

"Let's see, there's Eunji from Apink, she's a great person to bake with she constantly will make you laugh, um oh Suyeon from Weki Meki, she likes to send me random recipes that we can try making together, oh and also one of my closest friends, Baekho from Nu'est, do you know him..?" You asked her with a proud smile.

"Nu'est..? Of course I know them, who doesn't." She smiled as she took note of everyone you mentioned.

"Well we met a little over a year ago for a showcase they had and since then he's been coming over so I can show him how to bake. He likes surprising his members with cakes. He may look like a big tough guy on the outside, but on the inside he's just the absolute sweetest guy I've ever met."

"Oh wow I definitely did not know that, he definitely doesn't seem like the baking type." Wendy stood up after you did and she started stretching.

"I know right, he's absolutely adorable when he focuses so hard on adding the right amount of ingredients." You smiled as you thought about just how long he spent measuring every single ingredient. You looked at Wendy, surprised to see the look she had on her face. "I mean, adorable as in a sibling kind of way. I don't think about him in that other kind of way.." You shook your head to further prove your point.

"Huh..? oh no I never thought you did.." Wendy mumbled as she waved her hands in front of her, in a way to try and clear up the misunderstanding.

"Oh, it's just because of the look you had on your face. I guess friendships between guys and girls in this type of industry can't be that open and honest between each other." You shook your head as you avoided making eye contact with her. "I should really go now, I have some things I need to look over before the show case." You mumbled before respectfully dismissing yourself.

"Right, I should probably head in too, we need to go over the set list for tonight.." Wendy said as she watched you walk away.

_

There were approximately ten more minutes left until fans were going to be let into the venue, so everyone backstage was running around making sure everything was set up and ready to go. You were in a corner talking to your manager and one of the camera directors about how long tonight's even was going to be and if one of your special surprises was all set for later in the event. Red velvet were lined up in the hallway as they got all of their microphones fitted. Seulgi was going over a few of their dance moves with the youngest two in the group, as the older two talked about the songs they were going to be performing before the event let out.

"All right doors are opening, the first few people should be heading in now." A staff member had told your manager before dismissing himself to go let the others know.

"You nervous..?" Your manager asked you when he noticed the look on your face.

"What..? No of course not, it's just another day." You answered him with a smile as you fiddled with the cards you were holding in one hand.

"Okay, well if you need to take a drink of water I'd suggest you do it now, this event is going to last a while." Your manager looked away when his attention was being called for by another staff member, "I have to go, you're going to do great!" He reassured you before walking away.

You leaned against the wall behind you, lifting your head up to take deep breathes in a way to calm your nerves. You never got this nervous before an event, so this feeling was completely new to you.

You soon felt someone tapping on your shoulder so before looking down at who it was you closed your eyes to draw in one more deep breathe. You looked down and smiled when you saw who it was, "Yes..?"

"Ah, im sorry to bother you, but we couldn't help but notice that your hair got entangled in your earring."

"Oh really..?" You stood up straight as you reached for the ear she mentioned.

"Oh here, I got it.."

"Thank you Yeri" You smiled at her once she placed your hair back in place.

"It's no problem, we've all been there before." She smiled back before walking back to her group mates.

"You're the one who noticed it and I told you to go do it, why did you make me go..?" Yeri glared at Wendy.

Wendy shrugged, "Just because.."

"Just because..? That's it..? Ugh I hate you, I hope you trip on stage," Yeri crossed her arms across her chest as she rolled her eyes.

"Hey stop it, she doesn't mean it Wendy." Irene lightly smacked Yeri's arm, "Don't say that, she could get hurt on stage, it's not something to joke about Yerim."

"Ouch, okay I'm sorry Wendy." Yeri rubbed her arm before walking away to join Seulgi and Joy.

"Hey guys, less than three minutes left. The host is going to walk on stage first and give a brief introduction of today's events then you will all walk on stage. Introduce yourselves then go and sit down in the spots you chose earlier." A stage assistant told the girls before running off to go and tell you that you were ready to head on stage.

Music was playing over the speakers as the lights in the venue began to dim. The song had something to do with Butterflies but you didn't have time to sit and listen to music, it was time to walk out on Stage.

As soon as you walked out on the stage with the spot light on you, the crowd began to cheer. You swallowed the nerves that had been building up inside of you for the past few hours and smiled. This was who you were, you were in your element and nothing could distract you now.

"Hello everyone" You bowed your head to the crowd and smiled as some of the crowd began to cheer even louder. "Wow, I'm definitely loving the energy in here right now, and I'm sure the girls will too. How's everyone feeling today..?" You paused as you listened to the crowd yell their responses, a mixture of either goods or saying it's hot. "Haha, I know a good amount of you had been waiting out there for a few hours, so someone is walking by handing out waters, so feel free to take one." After you saw the relieved look on some of the members of the crowds faces you continued, "Alright then, I'll go ahead and introduce myself. Hello I am the host for tonight's event. Day one of Red Velvets Third Full Album showcase. I'm am excited to be here tonight to host this event and I hope all of you are excited as well." You waited for the crowd to calm down before taking a few steps back, "Alright so let me introduce, Red Velvet." You gestured to the side of the stage where the girls were going to walk out. You couldn't hide the smile on your face when you heard the crowd go absolutely crazy as the girls stepped out with smiles.

The girls introduced themselves to the crowd and then you all moved to go sit down.

You sat in your spot and smiled as you held your microphone in front of you. "So did you guys watch the short interview that was uploaded an hour ago..?" After hearing a bunch of yeahs from the crowd you let out a small laugh, "Okay then so you are all prepared for how hard it's going to be to crack them for information." The crowd laughed as a few of them nodded. "Alright then, let's begin."

_

You were now standing back stage watching the girls perform their five song set list for the night. They were currently on their third song when you went to find a staff member to make sure your surprise was ready.

After checking everything and making sure it was all set up, you went back to watching the girls perform. They were soon finished so you walked back out with a smile as you clapped.

"Wow let's give up to Red Velvet." The crowd cheered even louder while the girls took a moment to finally catch their breathe.

A staff member ran out on stage to hand the girls a bottle of water each before disappearing behind the stage.

You waited for the crowd to calm down before speaking again. "Wow that was an amazing performance, I bet you are tired so why don't you catch your breath and sit down." You told all five members who only nodded as they started opening their water bottles. You walked up closer to the edge of the stage as the members all walked to go sit down. "So how was that..? They were amazing weren't they..?" You asked the crowd, amazed at the way they managed to get even more loud than they were at the beginning of the event. "Wow which song was your favorite..?" You asked again as you waited for a couple of answers to be shouted from the crowd. "What about that dancing..? Wow that was amazing." You turned to smile at the girls. "Well it's looks like we only have around ten more minutes left for tonight," You walked to go sit in your spot. "So Irene, would you like to remind everyone when the album comes out..?"

Irene smiled before holding her microphone up to her mouth, "Yes, our new album, Red Herring, is coming out tomorrow morning at ten alongside our new Music Video. We really hope you all enjoy it as we've all put in a lot of hard work. This was a long project but a project we're very proud of."

"Thank you Irene," You sent her a smile before turning to face the crowd again, "I hope you all remember that their first performance of their new songs will be here tomorrow evening, I hope we get to see some of your faces here tomorrow too." You stood up, "Now I have a surprise for everyone here today, I really hope you all like it." You looked over at the edge of the stage and gave the stage director a nod.

Two staff members ran on stage with small bags to hand out to the members. As they got their surprise, staff members walked all through the rows of seats handing everyone in the crowd their own bag of goodies.

"Wow what's this..?" All the girls asked question's when they looked at the bags in their hands.

You smiled proudly as you saw everyone look at their bags, eyes filled with joy.

"Now, I'm sure you are all wondering what this is, allow me to explain. These are macaroons, im sure you're all familiar with them. I made all of these myself this past week and they represent the members of red velvet and you guys. Yeri I'll start with you." You pointed at the bag in her hand, "You got five purple macaroons with the flavor grape, you'll notice there's also a half pink and red one in there. That represents your fans. Reveluvs. Joy you got five green macaroons, flavored as Kiwi. Wendy, this was a weird combination but I enjoyed making it, you got five blue macaroons, flavored orange. Seulgi you got five yellow macaroon's, flavored pineapple. And lastly Irene you got five pink macaroons, flavored watermelon. You each get one half pink and red macaroon to symbolize your amazing fans." You stood there as the girls all smiled and clapped, "Now you guys," You gestured to the crowd, "All of you got one of each of these to represent red velvet and yourselves. There's a little piece of paper in there with all the ingredients so if you're allergic to anything listed please do not eat anything in the bag and let a staff member know, I have something else prepared for those of you with allergies. I also wanted to let you know that the dye used in these macaroons are all natural dyes. I hope you all enjoy."

"Thank you so much, this is the sweetest thing anyone has done for us and our reveluvs." Irene spoke into the microphone before placing it down to whisper to Wendy. "I can see why you like her."

"Haha, it was no problem, I really enjoyed making them. I hope you all enjoy them." You took a moment to wait for the crowd to settle down before ending the event. "Now, sadly, it is time to say goodbye. I hope I see some familiar faces here tomorrow night since you never know if you will get another surprise." You smiled happily as some of the fans in the crowd lifted their bags in the air, cheering. "Please be careful on your way out and have a great night guys." You moved out of the way so Red Velvet could say bye before walking off stage. You followed after them, relief taking over you body as you stepped back stage.

"Good job today, you did great." Your manager walked up to you, helping you take the microphone pack off your clothes.

"Haha, your tongue is blue, did you try them..?" You asked him once he got it off you.

"Of course I did, you know I love your baking." He smiled, teeth blue.

"You better, or else you'd have to find someone else to bake your wifes birthday cake. Make sure everyone gets some, I made a lot."

"Everyone is making sure to get their share, go ahead and get dressed. We have a quick conference call with the boss then I'll drive you home."

"Okay, sounds good." You walked down the hallway do your dressing room, a happy feeling every time you saw someone walk by with a macaroon in their hands.

_

You and your manager just finished up the meeting with your boss that lasted around fifteen or so minutes. He was sitting in one of the chairs in the room, scrolling through his phone as he waited for you to get ready.

"Oh, hey is it okay if I go do something real quick. I have a few boxes with extra macaroons in here and I don't want them. I wanna go see if the members of Red Velvet want them." You showed him the stack of small white boxes in front of you.

"Yeah I don't care, I'm not in a rush. I'm ready whenever you're ready. Go, take your time." He waved at you with one hand as he used the other to hold his phone.

"Okay, ill be back in a little bit." You got up with the boxes in your arms. You made your way down to Red Velvets dressing room, you could hear them all talking and laughing behind the door. You couldn't quite knock so you tapped the bottom of the door with your foot.

After a few seconds the door opened and you were greeted with Yeri smiling at you, "Hey, what are you doing here..?" You couldn't help but notice the purple on her lips.

"I was just stopping by to see if you all wanted these. I made quite a lot of extras and I still have a few at home so I don't need these." You gestured for her to take a box so she could look inside.

"Oh my gosh, of course we want these. Here come inside, we're just doing a live broadcast so don't mind the other idiots." She opened the door to let you.

You were hoping just to be able to quickly drop the boxes off then head home, but it seemed like luck wasn't on your side.

You walked in and placed the boxes down where Yeri showed you and you were almost out of the door until Joy stopped you.

"Hey look who's here." She hollered to everyone else in the room.

Everyone walked over, including Seulgi who had a phone taping everything.

"Hey, did you need something..?" Irene asked you.

"Huh..? Oh no Yeri already helped me out, thanks for asking though." You smiled at her before trying to escape.

"Yeri..?" She looked over at the youngest.

"She brought us boxes of extra macaroons, she said she didn't need them since she still had extras at home so I told her we'd be glad to take them." Yeri explained, gesturing to the white boxes you placed down in the room.

"Oh no way, that's awesome. Yeri basically ate all of ours." Joy yelled as she ran over to the boxes.

The other three followed behind her and you were left alone with Wendy by the door.

"Okay, well I'm leaving now. I hope you enjoy them." you told them before stepping out.

You made it a few steps out the door before being stopped by Wendy.

"What's up..?" You turned to face her.

"Um, those uh macaroons, they're amazing." Wendy stumbled over her words, not quite knowing why she followed you outside, but here she was talking to you. "How did you make so many..?"

"Oh haha, well I was just playing around with a bunch of recipes I found online, tweaking them to my liking and then just started making a bunch. They're really simple once you get used to making them. I thought they would make a nice gift for tonight." You made eye contact with her as you answered her.

"Really? I do that too. I find recipes online and make them my own all the time. It always turns out better that way."

"Yeah that's true. The macaroons were easy, yours were actually the ones that gave me to most trouble. I kept forgetting what flavor they were supposed to be but in the end I think it all turned out good. There's a whole box in there filled with them." The both of you just stood there in silence, you didn't know what else to talk about so you were about to walk away until wendy finally spoke up.

"Do you think you could show me how to make them..? I've tried making them before but they never turned out like that." Wendy's voice was shaky as she avoided your gaze.

"Huh?? Really? I would love to show you how to make them!" You clapped your hands in front of you.

"Really..?" She finally looked up at the bright smile on your face.

"Of course, I love baking with people. I can give you my number if you'd like. We can set a date for you to come over and bake." You pulled your phone out of your pocket.

"Oh, that would be nice." Wendy grabbed your phone as you handed it to her and entered her number. Then you switched and you put your number in her phone, the entire time talking about which flavors you wanted to try.

"Okay Wendy, it was nice talking to you and I can't wait to bake with you but I should let you go back in now, I'm sure your members are wondering where you went off to."

Wendy just stared at you for a while before speaking up, "Hey, wait. Before you go, I just wanted to apologize for earlier today. I totally wasn't thinking whatever it was you thought I was thinking. I was just more surprised at the fact that a man like Baekho focused that hard on ingredient measurements, I cant even get Yeri to add the right amount of water to packaged noodles so it was just surprising to me. I'm sorry if my facial reactions offended you in anyway, I didn't mean to. I've actually been a big fan of yours for the past few years and I'm kind of upset with myself that that was the impression I left on you."

"Oh, Wendy No. You don't need to apologize, I should be the one apologizing. I shouldn't have reacted that way without hearing you out first. I'm sorry, I was just stressed out and I let my stress get the best of me. I shouldn't have let it. I don't think you're a bad person in any way, you're one of the nicest people I met. I hope we can put that whole thing behind us. It was childish for me to make an assumption like that. I'm truly, deeply sorry." You looked down at your shoes in shame.

"I would like it if we could just put it behind us.." Wendy's voice was quiet as she watched the way your fingers fumbled with each other.

"Me too.." You looked up at her. "Hi Wendy, it's nice to meet you. I heard you're a big fan of baking, so am I. Want to bake together one day..?" You stuck your hand out to her.

Wendy looked at you in shock before understanding what you were doing. "Oh, hello there. Of course that sounds like an amazing idea. I cant wait." She shook your hand, both of your smiles matching each other.

"Alright then Miss Wendy, it's time for me to go. I'll see you tomorrow." You let go of her hand to wave at her.

"Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow." She waved back, watching you walk down the hallway. It wasnt until she heard someone call her name that she looked away from you.

"psst, seungwan, what happened??" All four of the girls were peaking out of the cracked door, Joy asking the questions, "Did you get her number?"

Wendy walked up to the four of them, unable to hide her smile as she nodded. "We have a baking date soon.."

"What?" All four of them yelled in shock.

"Well it's not a date date, but she invited me over to her house to bake with her." Wendy explained as she stepped past the girls to go inside.

"That is adorable, I wonder how it's going to go.." Seulgi said walking behind Wendy.

"Yeah I do too, I guess we'll find out later." She mumbled as she checked her phone when she got a message from you.

"Can't wait to bake with you Wendy! Have a great night and stay safe!"

Wendy smiled at her phone before typing back her reply. "Thank you, I can't wait either. See you soon"

"Oh my god are they already texting each other, she just left.." Yeri whispered to Joy.

Joy laughed and shook her head, "Don't judge her too much, she finally got the chance to talk to her dream girl, we should be proud of this idiot."

The girls all stared at the way Wendy kept smiling at her phone as the two of you exchanged messages. Wendy was happy and that's all that mattered.

[tecnashifts]

extra things to script

random things that technically aren't too important but i like to add to my scripts.

fans don't get into horrible, sending dts type fanwars.

your fans are good at streaming and voting.

whatever you order arrives at your front door an hour after you order them and doesn't get stolen.

apps (bubble, twitter, etc.) have accurate translations.

no snow app.

maknae on top, drive, scissors, etc. are on spotify.

interviewers rarely ask stupid questions or make stupid comments.

got7 still promote as a group.

after got7 left jype, they joined starship ent.

jae isn't part of day6, james charles, shawn dawson, jeffery star, trisha paytas never got popular, lucas was never part of nct.

there was a better president than trump and she’s a women of color 🙏🏼.

there are more women/woc/poc in government.

jyp has good wi-fi.

ballet slippers aren't painful.

shoes don't leave bruises or calluses.

w33d, smoking, & alcohol is legal in south korea and the legal age for both smoking and drinking is 18 (american age!!). (also please script none of that affects health.)

your group's known as monster rookies and one of THE 4th gen groups.

outfits never get in the way of dancing.

songs you steal have replacement songs that do as well and are good as the song from our cr.

filming solo parts in mvs aren’t cringy or embarrassing.

you can always find the cameras.

for aotm, artists are allow to preform a song that they’ve written for aotm that will be released after the aotm is posted.

school isn't hard for those who are in school.

jewelry doesn't break easy or get rusty

pizza hut keeps the pretzel crust 🙏🏼.

[causeilikelix]

Welcome!/Masterlist

My name is Ellie and this is my side writing blog.  My main blog is chogiwa6192, so please consider following me there!  Felix from Stray Kids is my current ultimate bias and I have a MASSIVE novel that I’m currently writing and editing about him, so stay tuned for that!

My AO3 is linked: Here

General Masterlist:

Bang Chan

The Taste of Blueberries

Minho

Nothing yet... 

Changbin

Nothing Yet...

Hyunjin 

During the Rainstorm- Masterlist  

Jisung

Nothing Yet... 

Felix

‘Cause I Like You - Masterlist

The Boy (and Girl) Next Door)

Seungmin

Nothing yet..

Jeongin

Nothing yet...

Soulmate Smut Au Masterlist

I mainly write for Stray Kids, Exo, and Day6 but hopefully this will be expanding soon! 

I write smut for everyone except Seungmin and Jeongin from SKZ because they’re way too young for me and I feel creepy writing for them.  

At the moment I am NOT taking requests but my inbox is ALWAYS open for soft and hard hours for any idols I write for, but I’ll happily fangirl with you about anyone! 

[agustd-png]

Day6 Smut Headcanons

As promised, here's some smut headcanons for these boys! 💙🍀💚 I posted a Younghyun A-Z once, but that was 5 years ago (!) so my opinions are probably a bit different now. 18+ under the cut, yall~

Sungjin

It takes him awhile to really understand that you find him hot, to understand that yes, you are very attracted to him. He doesn't see himself in that way, so it's flattering and surprising for him, even if you tell him on many different occasions. Because of that, you often have to be the one to initiate sex, at least for a few months into a relationship. But when he is in bed, he's a good partner; very attentive, and passionate when he gets going. No dom/sub dynamic with him, just mutual pleasure. Everything's very balanced: you go down on him, he's gonna go down on you. He doesn't really think about which of those he likes better, it's all nice in his mind. When you give him head, he guides you carefully with both hands, watching you intently and holding your hair gently. When he gives you head, he focuses and closes his eyes, making out with your pussy until you're squirming. Loves to shove his tongue as deep into you as he can get it. He loves to be on top and in control, so something classic like missionary is definitely a go-to, but he also loves having you on your stomach and taking you from behind. His sounds are minimal, as he tries to maintain that Busan tenacity, but when he does let go, his moans are deep, clear, and melodic with a slight husk. When he cums, he pushes deep into you, bites hard on his lip and slips out a curse. And oh does he love to cum inside you, to fill you up and revel in his possessive tendencies. But if not inside you, he likes it when you jerk him off onto your tongue. Would call you something like "angel" or "kitten". He probably wouldn't say it outright, but he loves to spoil you.

Younghyun

A very intimate partner; his hands are all over your body whenever he gets the chance. He'll come up behind you when you're cooking or doing dishes and wrap his arms around you, kissing your neck or just standing there with you in his arms and his chin on your shoulder. In bed, he'll pull off your garments piece by piece and let his hands and lips traverse your body before anything else. He loves intimate positions where your bodies are closely intertwined, and loves to hold your gaze while you have sex. Having you straddling him while he sits on a couch or comfy chair is a fave for him, and he'd be up for cock warming too. Calls you "baby" all the time, and likes to be called a nice little domestic pet name like "honey". He's very talkative during sex, not just with dirty talk, but having like full conversations. He has such a penchant for truly enjoying and appreciating experiences while he's having them, so it's quite common for him to smile warmly at you when you're together. He loves oral sex, both giving and receiving. When he's giving, he spreads your legs wide and uses his fingers a lot, watching your reactions to everything. When you're going down on him, he furrows his brow and bites his lips till they're red and swollen, trying so hard not to let his instincts take over and fuck your face. But if you let him...yeah he'll take the opportunity. Deep throating is such a big turn on for him, and he just loves to cum in your mouth and see you swallow. He can be a bit shy with his moans, relying more on his words, but with a little encouragement will let you hear them more. And thank God for that, because he sounds lovely; relaxed and husky and sprinkled with dirty words under his breath. "Oh my God, you're so good for me, baby...taking it so good...yeah, you want it, don't you, baby? Tell me how much you want me..." If you suggest something a little kinkier or toys, he'd hesitantly be open to trying it.

Wonpil

Anyone who's read some of my Wonpil stuff knows that in my mind, he's the quintessential Baby Boy 😌💕 He needs a soft dom to take care of him. Very obedient and loves to please, he'd let you tie him up, gag him, blindfold him, leash him, tease him, edge him, whatever. He loves it when you take charge, and his favorite positions are when you're on top, though he also likes to spoon. He also would totally let you peg him. When he goes down on you, he prefers for you to sit on his face. Run your fingers through his hair and tell him how good he is letting you use his mouth, and he's melting into a whimpering puddle beneath you. When you go down on him, he squirms and whimpers for more, but bites his tongue to keep himself from begging too much. He watches you with shaky breath as you take all of him in your mouth. Cums wherever you tell him to, often ending up doing so in your hand. He tries his best to hold it until you tell him he can cum, but he has a hard time with that. Breathy, clipped, whiny moans leave him when you touch him, only getting louder and whinier the closer he gets. "Please, I'm so close, c-can I cum, please?" He's very curious about toys and open to experimenting with them, on himself and on you. Loves to be called "baby boy", "honey", "sweetie", things like that. He'll call you "baby" in public and whatever you want him to behind closed doors. He gets off to the idea of cuckolding, but would probably never actually let another person fuck you.

Dowoon

He gets kinda cocky when he knows you want him, and so uses the opportunity to tease you and make you ask for it. He likes to hear you say you want him, and sometimes playfully won't even let you kiss him until you say as much. Despite that, he's clingy, but not annoyingly so. It's really very endearing. Innocent date nights turn hotter faster with him, and you may never watch an entire movie together, as you always end up dry humping or fucking before the credits roll. He loves your ass and is always finding some excuse to have his hand on it. In public he'll just call you by your name, but in bed he likes to call you "princess" or "good girl" and to think of himself as more dom than he actually is. Deep grunts rumble in his chest, along with exasperated exhales, when you fuck. "Going crazy, can't believe how good you feel..." He's actually not that into receiving head, but he loves a good handjob. He'll go down on you, but thinks of it more as foreplay and doesn't stay down there long. Which is a shame, because he's quite good at it. He just can't wait to be inside you and often gets ahead of himself, and so most of your sex life is intercourse. But once he starts fucking you, he's so determined to do his very best. He's focused and passionate, and loves to try all kinds of positions. If he had to choose a favorite, it would probably be reverse cowgirl. Again, because he loves your ass, and because it's endlessly hot to him to watch you riding him. He's also a bit voyeuristic, loving to watch you get yourself off. Public sex is intriguing to him, but he's hesitant to actually try it. He loves to cum on your chest, and often ends up just pulling out and hurriedly cumming wherever's closest, like your ass or lower stomach. Doesn't often cum inside you though, he likes to see your skin covered in it.

[kpopjust4u]

Don’t you dare!

Post Date: 6th June 2022 Content: Angst/Smut - Day6 Jae x Reader  WC: 2.3K TW?: DDLG/ Hair Pulling/ Cussing/ Edging/ Masterbating/ Fingering/ Hickeys/ Degration  Request?: Yes 

Masterlist                                    Prompt list

Prompts: 6 - “Try me” 11 - “You’ve pissed me off now” 35 - “Say please”

“What do you have there?” Jae curiously asks, staring down the extremely delicious looking homemade milkshake that you have in your grasp, slowly sipping from as you smle at up at him, wiggling your shoulders happily, “A milkshake,” you reply, all soft. He couldn’t help but scoff at how cute you were trying to act cool, moving closer to you, to try and get a sip of the milkshake but you pull it away from him all defensive, “If you want some, go make your own!” you whine at him, pushing yourself up against the edge of the other side of the couch. His eyes roll to the back of his head, already fed up of your shit as he just wanted to try it, “Fine, be like that then,” he mutters under his breath and you’re content again with your little creation, whilst he just sits there, pouting at you but tries to not make it obvious. 

Without warning, he walks out of the room, bored out of his skull, to try and find something to do himself hoping you’d notice at some point to make effort to bother him, since he’s too stubborn to ask you to do something himself. It’s been a while since he last streamed, so that was his first idea, setting himself ready to go live, grabbing a few snacks and a drink ready for a game binge whilst talking to friends. It only took a matter of 10 minutes before you realised Jae wasn’t sitting next to you, as you look around briefly, wondering where he may have gone, would he have gone to make his own milkshake? Or would he be pouting to himself at his desk? Suddenly getting all curious, you shuffle to your feet, pulling down your hoodie as you get ready to go on a boyfriend hunt. As you slowly get closer to his little studio, you could hear his little laugh, muffled by the walls and doors in the way. You tip-toe towards the door, taking hold of the door handle before slowly and attentively being quiet to turn it, exposing your boyfriend’s silhouette in front of his monitors, playing a 1st person shooting game, laughing at his friends in chat. 

For minutes, you peep around the door, in hopes he’d realise you’re there, but with no luck, you creep inside the room, silently closing the door behind you as you go to sit in the spare chair, spending minutes there twiddling your thumbs from anticipation that he’s going to notice you at some point, though you just found yourself getting impatient and even more bored as he continued to glue his eyes to the game on the screen. It was time to start pulling some antics out of your sleeve as you creep behind him, putting your hands on his shoulders, making him jump, and receiving a little shout from him as you scare him. You could hear his friends laughing through the headset as you start laughing yourself, clutching your chest, his reaction tickling you as you fall back onto the chair. “You guys didn’t hear anything!” he cries to his friends on the mic before muting himself, slowly turning around in his chair to face you, tears of laughter streaming down your face, “Since when did you come in?!” he cries, pouting, hand still checking for a heartbeat in his chest, “Like 20 minutes ago!” you splutter through laughter, watching his face fall, just adding to your hysterical state. You swear you would be rich with the number of times this guy rolls his eyes, as he quickly unmutes himself to answer his friends who called for him. He took this as a chance to ignore you, purposely this time as he tries to focus on his game once again.

After catching your breath, and attempting to calm down, you weren’t going to put up with him purposely ignoring the fact you were in the room, so it was time to turn it up a notch. How would he react to you teasing him whilst he tries to pay attention to his game? You were so ready to find out the answer as you move your chair closer to him, practically hip-to-hip, receiving a brief evil glare off him as you sit there, playing all innocent, as though you were just interested in what he was playing. Your fingertips trace their way up the arm of his chair, down to his knees, tickling up towards the top of his thigh, as you gently place your hand down, extremely close to his crotch. With disappointment from a lack of reaction, you inch your hand closer, resting it on his crotch this time, as you rest your head on his shoulder. Still, no reaction, so you put your antics on full, piss off Jae mode, as you move your head, adjusting it to be able to comfortably kiss his cheek, trailing it down his neck, licking and sucking on where you knew he liked it the most usually, receiving a hiss from him, muting himself again on the mic before biting at you, “Get off, what are you doing?” you play innocent, looking up at him with puppy eyes as you shuffle closer, but get pushed back on your chair, “You’ve pissed me off now, let me play my game”. A pout forms on your lips as he shrugs, putting his attention back to the screen.

That’s it, you’ve touched a nerve, mission accomplished. However, the reaction you’ve had seemed to have triggered something in you, that craved for him to bite, to get angry, to make you regret pissing him off, tempted to see how much you could do to get him to fuck you, giving in to your antics. Getting up on your feet, you slowly walk to behind him, running your fingers through his hair before pulling it slightly, kissing all up his neck again. Within seconds, you could feel his long and slender fingers reach around to back of your neck, up into your hair to pull your head down next to him, so he could bite your lip before leaving go, pushing you back again a little. Noticing the grin on your face, he adjusts in his seat, a bulge growing in his tracksuit bottoms before he clicks his tongue, “Lads, I have to end the stream early, something came up... Yeah... I’ll speak to you soon, goodnight”. 

For moments, you stood there, shaking a little from being highly turned on by his reactions, but also at the fact you didn’t know what he was thinking or going to do, as he lets out a loud sigh, before turning in his chair to stand up, hovering over and looking down at you, with angry lust in his eyes. You swallow hard, gulping at the sudden feeling of being scared rush through you as you back off a little but he follows you, keeping eye contact. “What the fuck, do you think you’re doing? Playing up like that?” he growls as you nervously giggle, shrugging your shoulders before stiffening up, realising you wanted this as you walk up to him, braving to react like a brat, “I just felt like it~” you sung, as your hands clasp together, falling in front of you as you swayed yourself, innocently, puppy eyes returning to wind him up even more.

“Oh really, that’s how you wanna be? You’re going ot act like a brat huh?” he says softly before turning cold, hand caressing your cheek before moving down to your throat, grabbing it tightly, “Try me”. If you weren’t wet from the events leading up to this, you definitely were as you try to suppress a moan, keeping a smirk plastered on your lips before biting your bottom lip, making him growl at the sight, leaning in, face so close to yours, you could feel his breath gently blowing against your lips. You’re now falling into his trap, his lips millimetres away from yours, giving you the impression as though he was finally going to kiss you, but he pulls away, making you whine. Now the smirk was on his face as he lets go of you, attempting to walk away before you know that all you had to do now was get all bratty on him, “Little bitch” you mutter under your breath, making him turn on his heels, tongue in cheek, “What did you say?” he voices, you knew you were done for now, as he runs his hand up to the back of your head, pulling at your hair once again, pulling your head to the side. “I asked you a question, you better answer it, baby girl,” he voices, as you whimper, trying to keep up the brat facade, but the way he has you is inevitably too much for you to even risk it even more, though you still don’t answer, keeping your lips glued together.

From receiving no answer from you, he picks you up and places you on the table next to him, grip still on your hair as he pulls your head to the side, giving him access to trail kisses down your neck, starting from just behind the ear down, lacking forgiveness as he nips at your skin, sucking harshly, leaving dark purple marks, at least 4 on your neck. These made you whimper, and almost moan but you fight strongly against it, for now. “Fuck, Daddy,” you whimper as your body twitches under the pain from his biting, but it was so pleasurable as you try to put your hand down your shorts, your fingers rubbing circles on your clit, creating more pleasure, sending shivers down your spine. Though that didn’t last long as he notices what you were doing, gripping onto your wrist as he pulls your hand out, licking your fingers before smirking and letting go of his grip on your hair. Instead, he grabs tight onto your hips, bruising them from the tightness of it, as you use both of yours to hold yourself up, welcoming the kisses that he’s trailed up to your lips, tongue fighting for dominance as you finally let out a moan, making him chuckle into the kiss.

With a swift movement, your shorts and panties were removed from around your body, onto the floor. His fingers trail up your legs, tickling your thighs before a hand hovers over your core, as you prepare yourself for the pleasure you thought you were going to receive, his fingers slide up your folds before stopping and his hand is pulled away. You cry in disappointment, “Jae please don’t tease!” but all he could do was laugh at your reaction, tongue in cheek before he whispers in your ear, “Oh now I’m teasing you, it’s a problem huh?” followed by a nibble of your ear lobe. Your hand flies up to pull his head closer to yours, to kiss him, but he resists it, pulling back from the force of your pulling, “If you really want me that bad baby, you’re going to beg for it,” he orders, lips barely brushing against yours as you try to beg for your life to get him to touch you, “Daddy, fuck me!”. He shakes his head in disappointment, “Where did your manners go? Say please!”, you could barely even put words together, you craved him to touch you so bad, it took a lot for you to even concentrate properly, “Daddy, please, please fuck me!”.

The wish you asked for was granted to you as his hand trails back down to your core, as you open your legs wide enough for he had to comfortably fit in between your thighs, and for a finger to tease your clit, gliding through your soaking wet folds as he scoffs to himself, “I’ve barely even touched you, and look at you, so wet, dirty little whore,” you couldn’t even contain yourself, the sensation of his finger rubbing your clit in circles was driving you insane as you buck your hips for something more. It didn’t take long for him to enter a finger, then a second, pushing a third as you cry his name, his fingers curling upwards as he finger fucks you, causing the room to be filled with little whines and moans from you, Jae being very happy with himself for making you into a mess as you cry his name.

It didn’t take long either for the pressure to build up in your stomach as your orgasm comes close, you bite onto Jae’s lip, making out heavily, and sloppily, to get some control as your legs and body start to shake, and his fingers doing all the magic in your cunt as he keeps a steady pace, hitting your g-spot repetitively. With the way it was going, you were going to create a huge mess, and Jae knew this, welcoming it as he encourages you to cum all over his hand, “Come on baby girl, cum for me,” and within seconds, you’re cumming all over his hand, removing his fingers to rub your clit, making you squirm and scream, releasing your juices all over him and the floor before he makes you lick his fingers. The smug look on his face was a sight that you knew well, his cockiness shows through as he teases how you crumble under him, but you wanted more, “No, no more, this is all you’re getting for teasing me so much earlier. Behave like a good girl, and you may get fucked again later”, he says, caressing your cheek as you pout at him, which doesn’t work in your favour this time, as you try to gather yourself together after the experience you’ve just had. Now you know not to test his patience, and to not dare see how far you could push him.

[sunglassesd0ggo]

Hello guys! This list is about kpop. I've meet bts back in 2017-2018 but I understood nothing about them since I was a dumb child XD

But in 2019 I came back into kpop and I found so many new artists and groups, I started with Ateez, then TXT, and Seventeen and much more XD

Sometimes when I get tired of following my idols I stop and take a break of the kpop world but I never forget about my boys :)

Let's start! I'll prob put the song that made me stan them or the songs I really love!

They will be ranked according to the date I joined the fandom!

LIST:

TXT: 'Blue Hour' (First song) - I LOVE ALL THEIR SONGSSS I mean, they're all so good! 'Our Summer' will probably stay in my heart forever tho. I also really love all my children too XD I mean, we can't have a bias when they're all so cute and handsome at the same time right? TXT is the first fandom I've joined, I've been in the fandom since 08/25/2019! And they're my most loved fandom.

SKZ: 'Miroh' (First song), but what made me STAY was when I heard 'Hellevator'! - I also love all of their songs, it's so hard to choose one :( I really love listening to 'Spread My Wings' and 'Grow Up' tho, they're really sweet. I also love all my children here S2 Puppy have a special place in my heart tho haha. Joined in 2020, April-May.

SVT: 'Don't wanna cry' (First song), already a Stan XD, I don't have a favorite song in SVT, they're all so beautiful. It took me 1 month to memorize my boys names but I did it! Not in order tho- but I'm trying okay? :,) I really like how much of a team they're, and how they complete each other. I love watching Going SVT, they always made me laugh when I was down. Joined in June.

The Rose:

'Sorry' (First song), I met The Rose watching their concerts on KBS and I feel in love with their voices and skills. I love their songs, they're all good! Please stan The Rose ^^. It was the first band I've stan. Joined in June-July.

DAY6: 'Shoot me' (First song), everyone should listen to DAY6, they're really special for me too. I love all their songs :). Joined in August.

I'll continue this some other day, that's it for now ^^

[skipzujinskip]

a new seed

TW // contains mentions of depression and other mental health issues. Also contains explicit language and other statements that may offend some individuals. These are my thoughts and my philosophies, if you can’t handle it, kindly click out and drink some water. You have been warned...

8/08/22 - Monday 

Midnight

After days upon days of just pure non-stop working, I finally reach my day of rest and leisure. Last week was surely a rollercoaster. Not gonna lie, it was eventful but its dominated with feeling easily drained and burnt out. This is all due to not really giving time for myself as much last week. 

Wednesday was my only day-off, it was the day of the Tyler The Creator concert, which is gonna be a blog of its own at some point. To summarise, it was fucking awesome and definitely one of the sweet highlights of the year. To spent it with my amazing friends: Jaiden, Riri and Pami, it was a great memory and experience together. Forever love my bad bihz to death, through what we all went through, this whole experience symbolises how we are growing up together and we are able to pull through the toughest of times. The way we met: online during the early stages of the pandemic to meeting each other to continuing to live our wild days and now finding happiness. We are seizing it through our 20s in so many ways. I’m always looking forward to seeing my mainz again. 

As for Tyler, he is one of the most talented artist I have ever watched live. He can bring me to keep on dancing the whole night and vibe like I am living my best life. It has been forever that I felt so euphoric. It’s all about the music, vibes and getting all dressed up to an occasion to live like it was my last. Tyler the Creator was the first concert in an arena during the pandemic since seeing Day6 again in 2019. Everything about this concert was just special and symbolic to how i’m living right now. 

Enough of me talking about Tyler because like I said; this day deserves a blog of its own soon. 

1:53PM

After taking the most fattest sleep like a baby, i’m up and refreshed. As deserved, I took a nice tranquil bubble bath, washed and toned my hair and did my skincare routine. I had worked 6 days this week, back and forth from the suburbs to the city. 

Don’t get me wrong, I love working in the city. THE CITY IS MY GOD-DAMN HOME.  and I love my job. I give it my all or at least try to whenever it’s a 4-hour, 5-hour or 7 and 8-hour shift. To be the best, you gotta the feel the best. When I am drained and burnt out, things can go south. I over-think, I get anxious and I am restless. 

After Wednesday, I was in total auto-pilot mode. Mentally, my mind was going “FUCK IT, keep the ball going and just get bank” when really all I want to do is rest, stay home and spend time with my family. I think I over-work myself because last year, I was always feeling shitty being unemployed and when I finally got my job, out of all places in the city. I saw this as an opportunity to support myself and my family and to keep seizing every opportunity, wherever it may be going to work everyday and covering everyone’s shift. I also want to keep moving up and learning more. 

I later developed this mindset where how hard I work my ass off determines my worth and how everyone respects me. 

This is not the case. 🤡

In reality, nobody gives a single fuck. It took me a lot of anxiety attacks and cold attitudes from others to realise this. I like to think of this all like sugar. Just like sugar, a lil too much of it and you get sick of it. That was some people to me  and that was me at working batshit rapid crazy mode everyday. I was no longer happy and I started to feel absolutely worthless. 

Nowadays, I do not cover anyone’s shifts (unless it’s absolutely important) and I became kinda blunt which can get me in trouble sometimes but I still have some sunshine in me to brighten the mood up, just to people that want it. I still work my ass off but I do not fuck with cold attitudes and I make sure to read the room before I keep “poking the bear” with my “sunshine” and don’t let anyone fuck up my energy. and that’s how a baddie handles it. 

DO IT FOR MOTHERFUCKING YOU!!!

10:21pm

I have been really distant to my friends. Some days I can talk everyday to them but mostly there are times where you are not able to contact me for weeks or have not heard much from me. To put it this way - I value my time by myself more. I can only recharge by myself. I used to be a person that is surrounded by people everyday and after the shit that had happened this year and how drained I feel easily. I protect my energy. I watched Princess Nokia’s interview at some uni and she said something that really stuck to me and that is spiritual solitude. 

A lot of things that she said in that interview really aligned with me as of recently. I can no longer relate to people, most specifically my friends. You start to feel very left out and depressed because people are moving quick and you feel like you are stuck. To be even more specific, it’s more towards love. 

Being a queer individual, it’s hard to find love and you should not find love, love should find you. Most of my friends (mostly straight and bi) are cuffed and I start to feel very insecure. That is why I often zone out, I just can’t relate to my friends anymore. I remember rushing myself to every dating app, looking for validation to minimise my insecurity but it gets even worse when you put your effort and energy into it. These apps can get you in fucked up situations like it had to me earlier this year but I learned that these apps ain’t shit and I gave up on it. 

I never really been intimate or romantically deeply involved with someone, often every situation i’m in, it just happens to be one-sided. Talk about a series of misfortune when it comes to love. Now I am learning to channel this love for myself.  I know it’s so damn fucking annoying when people tell you to love yourself first. BUT IT’S SO DAMN VALID. How are you going to be happy, respected and loved in a relationship? I have witnessed red flags in my past situations and went with it because I had no fucking respect for myself, believing every person that I come across is good enough and will change. This later bit me in the ass and the people turned out to be pieces of shits: treating me as if I am disposable and or never good enough for them. I have also witnessed red flags in other relationships and have been caught in crossfires to the point that I have to distance myself from my friends just to protect myself spiritually (and mentally). It can get draining when people can never learn and often I see sides of people that are just ugly, often I hear “I can’t help it” which tells me you can’t evolve as a person to be better in this relationship and I can only do so much as a friend, but I can also sense some people (the people that I love and fuck with) that they are trying to be better and trying to adapt when they are in a relationship. I respect that and that’s why I am still in contact with them often. In a relationship, I don’t want to fight often, but also I am learning to communicate my issues: By first communicating the triggers to myself and how to work around it. Right now, I am learning to be the best partner to myself before I am the best partner to anyone. 

9/08/22 - Tuesday

7 in da morning 

An hour or two ago I just announced on my work group chat that I go by the name Zujin now (exactly in bold). 

They probably think i’m weird for telling them this now and not 10 months ago. I just thought I would not get hired for having such a name. I prefer the name Zujin over my real name. Sorry Mum and Dad but my real name is quite crappy and does not fit the person that I am (right now). I just think my real name does not suit me and to put it in the kindest way possible, it just does not resonate or identify with who I am (in other words it’s a fugly name to call me as such). 

I got the name Zujin by combining the name, Pazu from my favourite Studio Ghibli movie, Castle in the Sky and Jin from one of my childhood video games, TEKKEN. 

What does Zujin mean you may ask? 

Zujin is me. The name doesn’t define me, I define the name. 😝

3:27 PM

During lunch time, I treated my mother and my brother to a nice lunch at an Italian restaurant where we used to go all the time as kids. I was quite drained from the bank appointment I had prior. It seemed like the Bank teller was playing a computer game rather than getting shit done, well what is done is done. I was so stuffed from lunch. I ordered a “entree” size of lasagna while my mother ordered the same size of the fettuccine carbonara and my brother ordering a chicken schnitzel with chips and lemon sauce on the side. We all shared a medium sized pizza. 

I began to really care for my family after the loss of my spiritual mother. We went through a lot. My mother lost her best friend, my brother lost his Ninang and I lost that one person that I called my spiritual mom.

I was a fucking mess after her passing. It was one foolish and dumb decision after another. Did I regret the decisions that I made? nope. I like to say that these things happened for a reason, even though it gave me a lot of trauma and i’m on meds as a result. These mistakes needed to happen in order for me to grow and become the person that I am today. I changed completely to someone that drank and clubbed often to someone that prefers staying home and doing wholesome shit. 

I began to repair the strained relationship I have with my mother as well as become much more closer to my brothers than before. Now I am super close to my mother who I call my best friend at home. I know Tita Elvie is super proud of me, especially with the things I have overcame and the person I have became thanks to her raising me. I am trying to get my head up high and see the light of things. I have gained a special guardian angel in the form of my beloved Tita Elvie and that is something that I will forever be grateful and thankful for. My guardian angel is guiding me and protecting me. 

11:45

I am really nervous about going into work tomorrow. This is my first shift after changing my preferred name to Zujin. I am just unsure if people will respect that change. I gotta do this for me, for my spirit and for who I am. 

10/08/22 - Wednesday

9:55 PM

Today was my first day as Zujin at work. I was honestly expecting people to just call me my previous name just to make fun of me but everyone was celebrating the name change and welcoming the name with open arms 🥲. What really hit me was when I saw my name on the schedule as Zujin and in my head I was saying “HOLY SHIT THIS IS SURREAL.” Small things like this mean so much to me and they aren’t even small to me. It means people accept the person that I am. Zujin is a name with no label, it can be labeled as feminine and masculine but it just represents me: the person that I am, my “larger than life” personality and my evolution as a individual in a society where people have opinions about individuals not conforming to the norm. I have fully embraced myself to be unique and no, I am not saying I have that “i’m not like most people” complex. I am not really loud about it: my actions and who I am speak louder than words.  

I had a conversation with one of my baes, Rahma, in regards to love and the issues we face with certain friends. Rahma along with my other bae, Elena, we make the trio of Powerpuff Baddiez. We have been friends for almost two years and we had gone through so much shit with people who have come and go and it would always be us three that stick together in the end. That’s when you know, the bond we have is so deep despite how different each of us are. 

Rahma is from the same train line as me, we often have these DNMs on the way home that just help each other grow better as individuals and it gives me clarity to my thoughts, especially as we are continuing our paths as young-adults. Along with Elena, we bring out the best in each other and we have an honest and uplifting bond stronger than any diamond. 

Rahma and I conversed about relationship issues that our other friends are dealing with. When we are in a situation/relationship/or whatever you fucking call it when you are involved with a specific person; people can get lost. One of our friends have constantly been cancelling plans on us last minute and have been making our other friends fuming with heat with their recent behaviours. All this because this person wanted to be with their situation. All I can say is that friendship is an equal effort just like an intimate relationship. Just be honest, you can’t just organise a dinner, have your friends get ready and wait for you at dinner only to flake last minute. Not once but in multiple occasions.

This person is lost between love and validation. 

This person has a habit of being in situations and putting in her all, understandably they’re young but all I can hear about this person’s situation is negativity about them being in this intimate situation but chooses to keep spending more time with this person. Confusing, right? Sometimes people can’t be honest on why they stay and etc. People just can’t handle being alone and sometimes they need that someone to define them, worst of all validate them. Which is quite fucked up honestly. 

Another pair of friends we had were together in a relationship and it appeared on social media that they were nothing but all this “lovey-dovey” bull-crap but it was far from perfect. I don’t wanna get in trouble with people and get into depth on it but I’ll try my best to give some context: what happens when you put someone who is very possessive and easily-jealous with someone that is two-faced and hypocritical about numerous things, fuse them together with the tendency to be so desperate in a relationship, just to fall in love with the idea of love rather than falling in love with the person that stands right in front of them. This all equates to the clusterfuck of a disaster.

Don’t give me the “oh we’re just young” defence. I think people need to state their intentions and put in the effort to practice those intentions or else y’all are gonna create a mess and try dragging people into it to make each other look terrible in other people’s eyes. Clearly we ain’t picking a fucking side. 

This is the problem. Sometimes we can confuse love with validation. I am not an angel in this. In the past, I was insecure, believing I was not worth it for anyone despite me being very extroverted and bubbly. I let a person give me attention in a way where I was attractive to them. I haven’t had someone that looked at me in that way, therefore I was naive and was willing to be around them more. Later, they turned around and made me crave for their attention some more to the point where I was manipulated a lot which got me to where it’s fucking me up. It was nothing but pure toxicity. 

In the best way I described to Rahma regarding this situation: “Love is putting an equal amount of contribution in one mold. Validation is trying to put one different shape over another on to try and fit into a mold.” The two different  shapes represent the conflicting intentions of two individuals. 

Like I mentioned before, you can’t find love, love has to find you. If you are trying to find love in times of desperation: you are going to find yourself in a situation that will be the complete opposite of love, in other words, a SHIT HOLE. You gotta fall in love with yourself first, like I mentioned and it takes a lot of reflection, patience and understanding yourself. There are people that just want to have fun. Cool, but make your intentions clear with each other and don’t comprise yourself. 

11/08/22 - Thursday

8 PM

Today was kinda hard. The thing with having depression is that it’s hard to take control of you. I let my negative thoughts control me. In one moment you could be feeling on top of the world and then you feel something even the slightest. It all comes crashing down. It’s hard to even convey everything verbally when people ask you why you feel and are this way.

I went to hell and back this year and one of my coping mechanism was to go to work and just pretend the shit I’m dealing with wasn’t there. It worked like a charm til everything that I’ve bottled up suddenly exploded and I can barely hide it nowadays. People have so much expectations on me and it can get too much for me. I just wish people were easy and patient for me. In the past, people have projected a lot on to me, even if it had nothing to do with me. I was used to it and always gave them the benefit of the doubt. However, I’m too sensitive to even let that happen to me.  

I can be my own lover and best friend but I can be my own worst enemy. My thoughts and over-thinking weigh me down. I am too scared to ask for feedback. Due to the past, I put a lot on myself and often put myself down so often. I used put over my optimism over reality til reality catched up on me. I am trying to rebuild myself but I always put down my whimsical side.

11:13 PM

Just came home from the city with Lani and Rahma talking about our friend. I found a correlation between myself and our friend: my friend being stubborn about her situation to us and me being stubborn trying to make bank whilst putting my mental health on the line. I realised from that moment on, I want need to sincerely apologise to my colleagues. I have had numerous mood swings and all my managers/supervisors are trying to tell me is to focus on myself. I thought them cutting my hours and rostering me less days was because they wanted to see less of me and that I was being a burden to them. I thought the coldness from earlier was because they didn’t like me but truly its because they are disappointed that I have not made progress or effort to heal myself as much and focus on me. They only want the best for me. I know they believe in me but I need to believe in myself in order to feel their power to help me rise up from the deep sea of doubt and depression. I realise now that I desire a work-life balance and they are giving me this opportunity to do so and I keeping fucking up every chance because I want more hours or I cover my unavailable colleagues. I found work to be my life which should not be the case. I let my productivity from work define me which should not be the case. I need to prioritise myself over anything and what I need is to honour the time I can use to do numerous things in order to grow and heal. This includes learning how to drive, spending time with my family, pursue new hobbies like learning guitar, etc. 

I am learning to bring power over myself through my intentions but my main goal is to work on overcoming my trauma and overcoming loss. Last year, not once did I believe I will make it being employed and after that I will have the same feeling in the future where I sit and wonder, “Holy shit! I went through all that and I am thriving.” That is my motivation to keep going. I just know that I WILL REACH MY HIGHEST SELF.  

Beautiful cherry blossom trees don’t grow without rain. Diamonds aren’t made without pressure. You won’t see the sunshine and rainbow without the storm. Zujin can’t be a baddie if this bitch doesn’t fucking get it together. You know what? I AM THIS TIME. 🫡

12/08/22 - Friday

1:24 PM

It’s a new day, it’s a new beginning. 

It’s time to stay true to my word. Not gonna lie, I feel like I can relapse at any moment but I remind myself of my intention. Don’t let your dark self take over you. Let your highest self take control of you. I am learning to filter out negative energy which includes filtering my thoughts that are holding me back. I do have desires which I can’t crave into because I have other things to do in the present and these occur at unexpected times. 

I am also learning to keep my mind, body and soul within the present rather than thinking about the past that I cannot change but can only learn from now. I can’t think far ahead too as the path is already made for me and time will tell. The only thing to focus on is the present. 

Just got my appointment made for my driving lessons. It’s honestly like a new seed is planted. This seed growing into something invincible, strong and beautiful. I really hope I am making my guardian angels proud. I remember Tita Elvie always picking me up from school, every day til she became my angel. I am bound to do the same for her to my brothers and to the ones that were looked after by her.

13/08/22 - Saturday

12:39 AM

I’ve never experienced such an experience where I felt one mood escalated to another like a meter. Friday night was kinda fucked. Imagine getting ditched by one of your closest friends for a guy that you don’t fuck with. It’s pretty natural to go heat-of-the-moment to yell out “GO FUCK YOURSELF” right at them for doing that. Just wanted to spend some time with my friend after a nice dinner, only to be ditched by someone’s break at work all of a sudden, left on pause and looking like a lost deer. Understandably, they are upset at me but honestly, I don’t want to apologise. 🫠🫠🫠 Why should I apologise? I understand how they feel after that whole debacle but the word “sorry” doesn’t solve anything. It only solves them but what does this solve me? I used to be so anxious when I make people upset but when it came to vice versa, it’s never “Sorry, Zujin”, it’s only “it’s your fault for feeling this way”. The word ‘sorry’ has no effect on me and it grew to be such a thing that i’m used to (am I problematic? hahahaha...). I take accountability for making them feel like shit but I am not gonna give them a sincere apology. No apology at all is better than giving an apology straight from a head shoved up one’s ass. 

For once can I be selfish... DON’T GET ME WRONG, I am a forgiving person but I prefer to see forgiveness through growth rather than coming from a single word. I have also been conflicted to even get into depth with this particular event, I shall leave it for another day, because I don’t even know what this person’s intentions going in to it. 🥲 All I can say is: don’t waste your time and energy on playing players because it comes back to bite you in the ass as you become the one getting played and getting in all your feels. People can get bored and do dumb shit like this but that is for younger people, let them do that. Meanwhile, being a grown young ADULT doing dumb shit like this is pure clownery at its finest. Find your worth and believe that you can be your highest self, deserving everything you desire. From there, you don’t commit this clownery of an act. It’s a skill and it takes a lot of patience for you: it starts by being grateful for the little things and then it escalates to bigger and brighter things you can be grateful for. It’s just sad to see your friend like this but at the end of the day, there’s so much you can do. (P.S. I ain’t apologising still unless I put my heart into it; to which my ass is being sat down on that apology. 

From that point on, someone special witnessed that moment. Someone that I later confided in. I don’t know how to describe this person. I am attracted to this person and things like this make me shy. This dancing derp-headed free spirit is fucking shy?! SHOCKER. I had a conversation with this person for about half an hour to an hour just chatting about life and getting to know each other. I was still on the fence about this person til this convo. People tell me to shoot my shot but things like that is something I can’t be bold about. Maybe it’s because i’m scared i’m gonna be rejected or the trauma from my past situations have an effect on me where I feel like I can be unlovable. Me and this person share a few interests but we are complete opposites as they are more introverted and I am more extroverted. Polar opposites attract just like a negative and positive ion attract each other in an atom (YUCK! SCIENCE). I am taking it slow from here and giving some effort as this person has did to me with their sweet gifts and secret messages. 

It’s so simple how someone like that can turn your whole mood around for the remainder of the day. I’ve never had someone that can make me smile and blush (ewwwwwwwwww kilig!!). The little things like that mean a lot to me and it just means that they are with you on this road and are cheering you on. I don’t know if they will ever read this, i’d lowkey would feel embarassed if they ever did, but: I am super grateful for you, thank you so so so much, not for only the gifts and the sweets but also for making me smile and brightening up my day every time you pass by me, giving me waves, checking up on me and protecting me throughout my day. I continue on to make you smile and brighten up your day with my crackhead energy, dancing and bubbliness, and I give you my smile as a thumbs up. Thank you. 

1:21 PM 

Just finished enjoying a nice lunch by myself: a good fat small burrito. 🥰 

I’ve grew to realise the person that I have become through all trauma trials and tribulations; I have become stronger of course, but I don’t let anyone walk all over me. I have stated earlier I have become blunt and I am starting to be more upfront and honest which can get me trouble sometimes. I realised sugar coating shit and being selfless just to please people is draining in all aspects of looking after yourself. To add to that: they take the kindness for weakness. I am in my “I don’t fucking care” stage right now. I guess this new found attitude and personality helps determine my own worth and shields me from a lot of things. I also seem to enjoy more of my time when I am alone compared to my past self always surrounding myself with people on the daily. I used to feel as if I can’t truly rely on myself and I was unable to be alone with my thoughts. Right now i’m still controlling it, I can be my own best friend but my own worst enemy. It’s all about learning to give power to what keeps your frequency high and what is holding you back. This mindset doesn’t just happen overnight, its mostly a marathon rather than a quick race. 

I’ve been honestly trying to make the effort for my family as I have this quest to see them happy through me. It all starts from making yourself happy and then giving that energy to them. My mother and I are closer than ever and I wanna make her feel like the most radiant human being ever. I got her a shit load of goodies today, it’s because she deserves it. She has driven me to places and sacrificed herself in order to raise us and to make sure we are healthy. As I continue to grow up, I wanna give back to her. It was never like this... Hell, she didn’t accept the person I am becoming but love conquers all and she started to see the vibrance and glow I radiate when I am just being who I am and she grew to accept me. I love my mother and she deserves the world and the light. I kinda inherited her selflessness and her willingness to help others, most importantly she adds to my golden heart along with my angel, Tita Elvie. 💛💛💛💛

[royadventures]

april 27th, 2022--5:00pn (on the dot!) and fighting sleepiness

previous log

if Eric Nam's there and back again is the soundtrack to my qurantine, day6's discography is the soundtrack to april? maybe even march too??

april 24th was a sunday study day! we had a late start since T had a meeting, so we had brunch at a nearby okace called 돼지 (pig) something?? their speciality was poro bulgogi, so we got that and it was good!! a whole set with rice and an omlette,, it was spicy tho and T couldn't enjoy it :(

we studied at ogod.a (as always T.T) and worked hard until T started getting hungry, so we found a Chinese restaurant (it looked really fancy for no reason O.O). we got jjajang bab there (black bean rice) and a seafood dish. it was pricey but good !

we then had bingsu :> it was the strawberry yogurt one this time? not bad, but too fruity/sour for my taste. matcha is still #1 for me :D

april 25th i had my first exam. it was for my contemporary literature class and was online, but i still struggled a bit T.T i think i ran short on time even though we were given the essay prompts in advance and had a lot of time to prepare.

i went to salt24 (a bakery) after my exam and also got strawberry juice from milano coffee (a small spot near home). the nutella croissant i got from salt24 was heavenly,, i want it again T.T

we (T and i) then we went to pc bang to study + buy astro tickets. we met T's friend, Lisa, who was in a mall somewhere. the mall had a pc bang in it, so we went there! it was a struggle for us to find each other, but we managed :> the pc bang was huge :") we were lucky Lisa is good with korean, because making an account and paying for the 4.5 hours we wanted to stay there would've been hard otherwise.

we found spots and did our best to study. i had a splitting headache for some reason but still persevered :") at 8pm we bought the astro tickets ! for some reason even though we were at a pc bang, the website was so slow T.T T managed to get tickets though, and for both days, too! i'll only be going to the first day, since Jinjin has his solo that day.

verivery had their comeback showcase, so i spent the rest of our time in the pc bang watching the showcase and studying. i also ordered shin ramen+cheese and milkis,, the milkis was good :") yogurty 맛!

we went home after that :>

april 26th Chanhee day!!! it was my death day for exams though. i had the 2 exams i was most scared for that day, and missed my bus and was late to my 9am exam. that was a great start T.T

i was super nervous as the bus kept hitting red lights... but it worked out T.T i arrived at 9:05 but actually the exam also started late, at that time. plus, although the exam was difficult, i finished early anyway!

i went to gongcha after and got a grapefruit yogurt tea? it was not bad :P but i don't like white pearl T.T

i attended my korean class while in gongcha, and then ate gimbap at a nearby convenience store. i was too nervous to eat a proper meal before my english enlightenment literature exam.

that exam was a flop. i was short on time and lowkey didn't know what i was doing but it's fine :> to cheer myself up, i went to the Chanhee cafés after!! they were so pretty!!!!

i also met some lovely people at the first cafe (new lovers club). so we went to the rest of the cafés together!!

i returned home alone and ate nbb for dinner before returning to the goshiwon, where T and i studied for korean before sleeping :>

april 27th i went to campus for my 10:30am class and also for the korean exam, but the exam turned online because the prof has covid :( so i went to sk future hall, where T was, and took the exam there. it was okay!

i ate in sk after the exam and it was weird,, no one really eats there and i had a full meal with side dishes and everything. i felt like people were watching and i just wanted to leave.. i went home after that and T and i ate at rolling pasta after her day was done. it was SO GOOD and we also had gongcha after :> i had a strawberry,, chocolate cookie? smoothie? ngl it was too sweet for me T.T

april 28th, we did part 2 of the korean exam at home and then went to campus to access the bank. after that, i took a clasa in gongcha while drinking mango juice+pearl (so good T.T). we then walked around anam and decided to eat banh mi, but it ended up being more just like a sandwich but we were hungry >.<

we went to dongdaemun mega box to watch dumbledore and the theatre was empty but gorgeous :> seriously, korean theatres are the dream !! the foodz are yummy, the seats are comfy, it's so clean.. wow! i ate fishcake and a potato hot dog (corn dog) from street food vendors and it was so good!!!!! we went home after the movie ^^ oh, i believe it was on this day when i bought Bang Chan's bubble,, random sidenote haha

april 29th was stray kids!!! aasfhjjkll i went on a run in the morning :> then T and i ate brunch at a Chinese restaurant, had ice cream at baskin robbins before parting ways (T went to get yet another tattoo and i went to jamsil stadium to see my beloveds).

oh, before eating brunch, i scoped out daisos for binoculars for the concert (it's kinda normal to bring binoculars to concerts here) but couldn't find them T.T lucky for me, the view was still so good :")

alone and nervous, i approached a group of international stays and befriended them!! they were from singapore and had come here just for the concert,, insane. we went to the venue to get our tickets, which were like a credit card,, such good quality,, and then went to a nearby burger king to quickly eat before the show!

it was packed outside the venue and there were a lot of international stays! everyone was so giddy, it was cute!

once i entered the venue and found my seat, someone asked to switch with me so their friend could sit next to them. i ended uo moving 3 rows closer (despite getting a little lost and sitting in the wrong seat several times).

the stay so i sat next to made conversation with me and we became friends! they were a korean but did their best with their english,, which was actually really good :") their bias was Minho!!!

the concert was,, don't even get me started. it lasted 3 hours and they. popped. off!!! they would perform like 7 songs in a row without taking a break... memorable moments:

red lights being the 3rd song performed, right after venom and they had ropes attached to their necks T.T

Seungmin running around the stage constantly, doing one last lap before they left the stage for the night, too

Hyunjin's red hair bleeding all over his neck and shirt collar

'아기 슈그림 빵' (baby custard bread) because Jeongin now had blonde hair but is he baby?? for flashing his abs T.T

Felix doing his best and having to sit out on some performances because of his injury but still vibing

stays cheering loudly for Bang Chan before he said his closing ment and him pointing ay himself several times and not believing the cheers were all for him

JYP being in the audience.....

the fun games that they made us play as we waited for the encore (there was an audience cam where a member of the audience would randomly get chosen and shown on screen and they would have to recreate a skz photo/dance the choreo)

Bang Chan's family being in the audience

so many voice cracks/stuttering and Jisung always saying 'let's try that again. 1, 2, 3, action!' when the members messed up their ments because they were tired/excited

Seungmin saying seeing the lightsticks after so long was beautiful

Jisung saying performing in front of us made him remember why he decided to be a singer

Hyunjin's dancing being ethereal even from afar

Bang Chan picking up Minho and bringing him to Seungmin so he could slap his butt

skz having a live band behind them for half of their songs and endlessly thanking them/shouting them out

now mama let me tell you. the way home was awful.

it was 11pm when the show ended and subways had stopped running. like 3000 stays needed to get home and there were only 2 busses running..

i missed the first one because itnwas full, so i walked to an earlier stop to be able to make it. i got on, but we were packed in their like sardines. i am not joking nor exaggerating, but it was to a point where bus doors would not open.

the girl in front of me kept dropping things and had to bend over in an already crowded space to retrieve her things.. it was kind of annoying but oh well!

i got home at 3am.

but it was all worth it :>

on april 30th, i ate brunch with T and went to somewhere near iksan dong to meet Lyly, a friend of a friend of a friend of T's, at a café. they're known for their donuts but i omly had room for am expensive tea T.T

we caught up and it was so cold,, i was wearing a T shirt in 10 degree weather.

we then went to the lantern festival for the birth of the Buddha and was lowkey a flop in my opinion,, i was cold as i mentioned and needed to pee,, we had to sit there for an hour before we even saw anything. plus before any of this, somehow we were given super heavy lanterns.. we just put them down somewhere because it was too much for us.

the lanterns were okay,, i went down into jonggak station exit 3 to pee and met Dami for some food. we had skewers nearby and then walked around, getting some bread from a convenience store before returning to where the lantern parade was and seeing confetti being pumped into the sky while these dancers performed on stage! it was like falling cherry blossoms :>

then we parted ways. bussing home was difficult again because it was late, but i managed!

next log

[markftmingi]

that thing you wrote about youngk and jisung being brothers and who can make you cum the hardest .... do u think you could write some smut about that? like a one shot or something bc🥺💦💦

yessss i got you baby i’m going to do a little bulleted scenario thing since i’m busy rn okay [i’m also on mobile so if the format looks weird i’ll fix it later]

brothers!young k & han

* so like i said before these boys look like twins but since they’re like 7 years apart,,, they’re just brothers

* they may look alike but their personalities set them apart like young k is older and more mature and knows what he wants and how to get it while jisung is more of a “let’s live in the moment” and just enjoy life to the fullest type

* they’re both determined to have you from themselves so they get really competitive in every aspect like who can make you laugh the most, who kisses better, who can make you cum the hardest, etc.

* in terms of who can make you laugh the most? han jisung won that competition,, not that young k isn’t funny (we all know he is) but jisung wins

* he’s just really cute and goofy to you and he’ll put his all into making you smile and laugh

* plus his interactions with the rest of skz always have you laughing

* who kisses better? brian young k. he’s older so i think he has more experience in kissing.

* he’s good at all kinds of kisses like the short and sweet ones to the long romantic kisses that take your breathe away to the hot and heavy make out sessions that leave you wanting more

* now who can make you cum the hardest??? hard competition

* both brothers put your needs before their own and make sure that you came before them if they could help it

* they had different styles/methods of doing it tho

* like young k was a fan of edging you

* he’d be fucking you with his fingers mouth sucking on your clit and have you seconds from cumming just to stop before you got to

* then he’d fuck you with skilled thrusts and bring you close to your release again just to stop and start over in a new position

* whenever he did decided to let you cum, you came HARD since you were on edge so many times

* now jisung wanted you to cum so many times

* first he’d make you cum with his tongue alone then have you squirt all over his fingers then have you bouncing on his cock before having you on your hands and knees doggystyle okay

* boy make sure that you came in every position and every orgasm was harder than the last one

* the competition of who could make you cum the hardest wasn’t decided so that’s why they continued to fuck you until you could decided you couldn’t