#dbd shitpost

[scarlibis]

The number of scarily accurate textpost memes you can make with these mfs is insane

[dat-is-i]

i saw this meme yesterday at 3am and i knew what i had to do

[theres-a-body-here]

Sable: "When meeting new people remember to keep it light and casual. Use our conversation starters if you get in trouble"

(Y/N), nodding along: "Light and casual, got it"

~~~~

(Y/N), throwing themselves at the Killer's feet: "I LOVE SWEATY, EVIL, AND VIOLENT MEN, PLEASE GO OUT WITH ME! PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE!"

Screams and yells echo through the realm as the killer frantically attempts to shake off (Y/N) from their thighs

~~~~

Sable, panicking and holding her head: "He's pulling the freak-off card THIS EARLY?"

Mikaela, looking through binoculars: "If he u-turns the topic back to the Mori Rework we might clutch this"

[daddy-deathslinger]

Can you do a Deathslinger / Knight / Oni / Ghostface with a thick s/o who is so strong that their perk is to literally carry their survivor friends while they heal? And during trial, when the killer sees an injured survivor, they were about to snatch them when they got accidentally lifted up and carried off by their s/o, who mistaken them due to a blindness effect perk?

Bonus if the injured survivor shout out, “WRONG PERSON” and when the effects wore off, s/o realizes they’re carrying the killer with ease

Howdy there! I hope you like what I came up with, needless to say the killers react waaay differently to this happening...

The Deathslinger/Caleb Quinn with a buff s/o

You’ve always been strong, and since entering the Entity’s realm your strength seems to have almost doubled. 

You have thus taken it upon yourself to be the protector of your fellow survivors, always putting their safety before your own.

So, as you see Meg helplessly bleeding behind a barn during one trial, you run towards her, ready to help. 

Suddenly the world seems to turn into some kind of haze, and Meg’s silhouette becomes harder to distinguish in the fog. But you find her and pick her up with ease.

“What in tarnation?!” 

That doesn’t sound like Meg at all, but you make a run for it with her on your back nonetheless. Time is running short, she needs to be healed, she needs help-

“WRONG PERSON, Y/N!”

That’s Meg.

You stop, dropping the person you held on your back to the ground. And then you see who it is.

“Caleb!” you exclaim in surprise, the killer squirming on the ground in embarrassment. “Caleb, I’m so sorry, I thought you were-”

“I know who ya thought I was”, Caleb mutters as he gets up quickly. “Let’s just… start this whole trial over, shall we?”

The Knight/Tarhos Kovács with a buff s/o

Tarhos is a strong man, but he doesn’t mind that you’re stronger than him.

Ofcourse, what he minds has its limits.

Like if he, during a trial, sends out his scouts, and they return empty handed. He growls in anger and goes scouting himself.

It takes him some time, but he eventually finds a coward that he injures! He hunts the coward, their screams of agony and fear brings him so much excitement and he can almost taste their blood and-

Suddenly, he feels himself being picked up from the ground.

The hunt is interrupted as someone, without any trouble at all, carries him away from his prey.

He shrieks in anger, waving with his arms in the air. The prey is left standing, just watching, and in the distance he can hear his scouts laugh.

“Shit, babe, I’m so sorry!”

He’s being put down, at last. His captor reveals themselves to be none other than his dear lover. 

“I-I didn’t see you, I mistook you for… Shit, I’m so sorry!”

This? Yeah, this he minds.

The Oni/Kazan Yamaoka with a buff s/o

Kazan is a strong and muscular man. He has fought many battles and killed mercilessly.

So when he met you, he knew he finally had found his equal. In strength, at least.

He likes training you, making use of your strengths to fight him.

So when, during one trial, things go a bit adrift, he’s confused.

It starts off as any trial, Kazan hunts and they run. He injures, and drinks their blood. He puts them on hooks and reap the rewards.

But this trial, things go different. He blinds them all with the perk that the Entity has blessed him with, and he has the high ground now. Nothing can stop him now-

Suddenly, as he’s about to go into rage mode and attack them all, someone picks him up with ease.

How? What? Who??

“Shit! Kazan!” he hears his lover exclaim, as he is abruptly dropped to the ground with a loud “FTUNK!”

He remains on the ground, just staring up at you in confusion. You stammer out an apology and ask him if he’s mad at you for ruining his moment.

Mad? How could he be mad? You’re strong, you’re powerful, you’re everything that Kazan admires. He’s never gonna let you go.

The Ghostface/Danny Johnson with a buff s/o

You know that Danny dislikes being the smaller person in the relationship, physically. He doesn’t feel too good about you being stronger than him, either.

And one trial, what can’t happen happens. 

It must have been the blindness effect, you don’t know what else could have caused it. You just wanted to help Kate!

You picked her up, as you always do when your friends need to heal and be on the move at the same time.

She was alot louder than usual when you did, though.

“For fuck’s sake, put me down Y/N!!!!”

Hmm…

He’s not gonna let you live this down, is he?

[fyreice360]

@rat-cookiez and I were discussing who was who in this meme and we couldn’t decide so we drew both options, I did this version

[theflatpackangel]

*slides in like the coolest person ever and then slips*

Y’all ever think about Charles and Edwin messing with paranormal investigations?

—

“Is there anybody here? It’s okay to come forward we won’t hurt you”

Charles (deciding to ruin the investigators day) “sorry, my life insurance doesn’t cover beyond the grave stuff, and you look a bit dodgy sooo..”

Anyway, fic when?

[rainewintersnow]

[honestlydarkprincess]

Charles: I wasn't hurt that badly! The doctor said all my bleeding was internal. That's where the blood is supposed to be! Edwin: ...

[hej-krukowaty]

I just think he's neat

[idliketobeatree]

i want to grind whatever the fuck edwin and charles have in a mortar and pestle, let it simmer in hot oil for 5 minutes, then throw in some garlic and onion so anyone who'll come into my flat will go oooh smells delicious what are you cooking? and they will be subjected to dead boy detectives or. no dinner

[robinsarm]

credit: @pepperssecreteyeliner on TikTok

[sleepysadwriter]

What are some of the most unhinged usernames you've run into on dead by daylight?

I've seen 'WeskerMakesMyCoochWet'

A duo with "I'm trying" & "well try harder xD"

"semen sucker Sally"

Duo of "Myers OF" and "Bubbas OF"

"Kingdomcum"

A few of these were featured in a dbd server I'm in

[dat-is-i]

it is pride month my dudes

[theres-a-body-here]

The DBD and the DBD fandoms fighting over the tag

[daddy-deathslinger]

Ok so how do you think Oni, Ghostface, and the Knight along with his crew react to their s/o being turned tiny in the my little oni event? For like a solid week the Entity turned some of the survivors small

The “My little Oni” event was so random, but I loved it! Here’s some HC’s for ya!

The Oni with a tiny s/o

Kazan has always thought that the larger and more intimidating you are, the stronger you are. And he values strength above all else.

So when he one match finds that you have shrunk in size, quite a lot to say the least, he is very conflicted. 

You’re still you, but now you’re… weak? Defenseless? 

But he soon finds that strength has nothing to do with size.

You evade him so easily now, you’re impossible to catch and you seem to be everywhere in a matter of seconds!

For the first time, he is at a disadvantage while consumed by Blood Fury, not finding you anywhere while sprinting around.

You’re so stealthy, but you never rub it in his face when you win a chase or escape unharmed. You’re gracious like that.

And that, Kazan thinks to himself, is strength. 

He admires tiny you more than he thought he would.

Ghostface with a tiny s/o

Danny just straight up laughs his ass off when he sees you.

Before you can even start complaining, he scoops you up in his hands.

You can trust that he’s gonna go around the match, showing you things from “his perspective”, just like that one meme you’ve shown him once.

Note to self: Do not show memes to Danny.

The Knight with a tiny s/o

When Tarhos and his men find out that you’ve turned extremely small, Tarhos first and foremost makes his faithful three promise not to make fun of you.

Yes, now you’re apparently small, another weird trick of the Entity, but he knows that you are still you.

On day one, he swears to protect you and guide you… through the very tall grass.

You find it a bit embarrassing, but soon you start seeing the positive with having your own squad to help you out in your tinyness.

You have Durkos to show you all the hidden places in the maps, so your stealth can increase even more.

Alejandro is well read and knows all the killers’ weaknesses, so he teaches you the deadliest insults to hurl as you run out the gates on your small legs. 

Sander teaches you all he can about combat, even though you won’t be needing much of that knowledge with your size, but you know he likes to pass on his knowledge. So you let him.

[mothgoats]

I drew this during the PTB, and I will only double down on how much I advocate for bows in his hair.