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clawsmiic · 5 months

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"If I'm being honest, no I'm not holding up okay."

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1.9k words

CW: Past Stancy mention, current Jancy, past feelings mention, and past/current unrequited love (both)

Prom Night, 1985

Prom night, supposedly one of the greatest nights of teenagers' lives. That's a sentiment Steve definitely wouldn't agree with, hanging out outside his own senior prom. He didn't even know why he bothered coming, knowing full well he'd see them together. Hand in hand, arm in arm, dancing to every cheesy slow song the DJ put on. As much as Steve tried to be supportive or ignore it...

He just wasn't over his ex-girlfriend yet.

But that didn't stop him from trying to be the bigger man in the situation. That's what Steve grew into being, the bigger person. No more being a total asshole for the sake of his own feelings. That's something Junior year Steve would do.

"Well, don't you just look so lively tonight." His trance breaks as he's approached by you, coming from the double doors of the Gym hallway not too far away.

"I'm not in the mood tonight."

Steve sounded both fed up and disgusted with your antics already. Even if this was just the first thing you said anything to him all day.

You lean against the cold brick gym wall. Feeling the rough bumps of the hard surface on your back and through your dress.

"Rough night, champ?" Steve sighs, rubbing his eyes, raw from a few minutes of being emotional.

"You don't know the half of it." Glancing over, he sees you for the first time. Admiring the floor length red dress, you always looked good in red. You looked good in everything, at least in his mind.

"Look at you, all dressed up and presentable for once." You smirk at his joke, making him chuckle and smile.

"I always look presentable thank you prick." Smirking to yourself before looking back at him.

"You look good in a tuxedo... Y'know, for you."

"Thanks for the backhanded compliment. Anything good from you is a rarity." You laugh, making him smile even wider. His eyes shift around the parking lot, watching cars pull in, and other kids come to join the party going on inside.

"What're you even doing out here by yourself? I thought you'd be in there with like 9 different girls trying to dance with you at once." He scoffs, fighting the urge to roll his eyes.

"You know, too many options beating down my door. Couldn't disappoint them all."

"Came stag too, huh?" He just nods in response, not saying anything as you both look up into the inky night sky. The only sound to fill the cold April night air was the crickets chirping and distant chatting of other students.

"Are you holding up okay? I saw them dancing inside and... I know the breakup was hard for you, so I just thought I'd check up on you..."

Steve let out a rough sigh, feeling like a complete idiot pining for his ex-girlfriend still. Being broken up for almost 5 months now. He couldn't let her go in his head, they were each other's first loves. At least she was to him.

All of that came crashing to a halt after everything back in November.

"If I'm being honest, no I'm not holding up okay."

"I know I'm not a therapist or anything..." You shrug, glancing back at him as you nervously chew on your thumbnail.

"You wanna talk about it?"

"Not really. I've been talking to Dustin for months about it and no matter how much I try I can't get past it. Like Nancy's cast some kind of spell to stick with me or something." He sighs, looking at the asphalt as he swallows harshly.

"Now we can hardly make eye contact for more than 3 seconds before she turns away... God, she must hate me."

"Steve, she doesn't hate you. She's probably just feeling awkward about everything and trying to respect her new relationship by not hanging around her ex-boyfriend. They're just trying to find their footing as a couple." You reassure him, leaning over to give him a squeeze on his shoulder. Thinking about what he said, you shake your head, grinning at the thought of Dustin.

"And really Steve? Dustin. He's like 14 and barely knows how to handle having a crush yet. He's never even had a girlfriend yet. I know he's smart for his age, but c'mon."

"I know! He's just a great listener. He knows a lot for his age, it's actually kinda scary." You roll your eyes looking at the ground, starting to laugh to yourself.

"What?" His full attention is on you now, a small smile pulling at his lips as he watches you start to laugh harder.

"Nothing I just..." You cover your mouth, snickering again.

"I just never pictured myself giving you of all people a pep talk... You're you for crying out loud. Steven "The Hair" Harrington." You grin, bumping his arm with your elbow.

"King Steve... You're literally the most popular guy in the entire school, and I'm... Me." He shrugs, crossing his arms over his chest.

"That's the fun thing. We're so different, so we can see our point of view while still seeing each other's... Plus, it's nice not having someone around trying to kiss my ass constantly."

"Yeah, I'll just kick your ass instead." You smirk, pressing off the wall, your heels click as you step in front of him.

"Look, I know it hurts now, but it'll pass eventually... And if I can be honest with you... You could do so much better than Nancy frickin' Wheeler."

Steve could feel his eyebrows shooting up in amusement as you got in front of him. For some odd reason, just standing there in your presence felt somewhat calming suddenly.

"Oh yeah? Who'd you have in mind then?"

"I don't know," you think for a second and shrug, "Farrah Fawcett? I think she'd think you were cute. Celebrity or not?"

"Farrah Fawcett? You think Farrah Fawcett, one of the most famous women alive, would want me?"

"Yeah! You're a hot guy, why wouldn't she?!" It's his turn to laugh now, shaking his head as he bites his lip.

"Where the hell would I even meet her?"

"I don't know! I thought we were talking hypothetically." Steve nodded, his face turning serious again.

"It's just... It's hard looking past Nancy, y'know. She was the first girl I ever loved."

"I'm aware, Steve. It's just not always the best thing to dwell on. I'm talking from experience." You bite the inside of your cheek and sigh. Nervous to be this honest, but if it helps get the point across, then so be it.

"Can I be honest with you about something?"

Steve looks at you, seeing how nervous you look to talk. His lips part slightly as he nods.

"Of course."

"I used to have a massive crush on Jonathan ages ago and when he started showing an interest in Nancy it killed me... But he's my friend, so I encouraged him. It killed me but I got over it."

You turn your head, looking up at the sky again, taking in the shining stars above the two of you. Feeling embarrassed about laying everything out there for someone you've barely gotten to know again.

"Took a while but time heals most wounds. So, just know I'm here for you because I know what it feels like... Kind of."

Steve felt your pain as you talked about how you couldn't be with Jonathan, and how that's basically how he felt about Nancy in all honesty.

Silence fell over the two of you as you both looked out to the sky, admiring the stars again. Steve looks over at you, feeling somewhat peaceful. Yet still wanting to ask so many questions.

"How'd you do it? Stay strong like that. I can barely be in a room with her right now."

"I talked to my family. That helped a lot... But I know you aren't the closest to your parents, so that's why I asked if you wanted to talk about it with me." You smile softly, lips turning up as you half shrugged at his question.

"I know we weren't always on the best of terms, but you're my friend and... I care about you."

"We're friends again?" His eyes seemed to light up almost, just like he was a little kid again. Over the past year he's felt like you two were bonding. But never wanted to ask out of fear.

Tension fills the air between you two. It's been this way since you two started becoming friends again. Going through hell together alongside the couple, Steve was trying to avoid like the plague.

"Well you know, when you nearly die fighting inner dimensional monsters together you tend to start caring about their well-being again... So, in a way, I guess we have to thank them for something at least."

Steve smirks before shaking his head.

"Part of me likes to think we'd be friends again someday."

"Who knows." You add, silence falling between you again. It's not long before Steve shifts, pushing himself off the wall and looking at you.

"So let’s say, hypothetically, that I was stuck at this stupid prom without a date and I had no one else to ask but you...”

"Mmm. Mmhm, hypothetically." You nod along, fighting back the urge to smirk.

"Go on."

Steve looked away for a second, collecting his thoughts. He takes a deep breath, turning back to you.

"And, hypothetically, I might need to spend our senior prom dancing, like my life depends on it, because it's possibly the last fun night before the rest of our lives."

"I'm starting to think you don't know what the word hypothetically means."

"Shush," he cuts you off, making you giggle before he continues, "now, hypothetically, would you be interested in dancing with me?"

You nod, looking like you were really thinking about it. As if you didn't know your answer already.

"Well, hypothetically," you play along, making sure to hold eye contact, "I might be inclined to say yes... If it wasn't a hypothetical, of course."

You rub your hand over your mouth, smirking behind it. He holds eye contact, faking a scoff as he stares.

"You're gonna make me ask?" You nod, tongue going to his cheek as he also nods.

"You're impossible, you know that?"

"I wouldn't be saying that to a girl you're about to ask to prom Steve." He chuckles, nodding. You got him there.

His expression shifts to a goofy grin as he sighs with a slight relief.

"You think you can survive the night without making fun of me?" He smirks, holding his hand out for you to grab, you smile back at him taking it gently. Giving him a reassuring squeeze.

"I don't know about the whole night, but I can sure try my best." Rolling his eyes, he pulls you into his side, lacing his arm around your waist.

You look up at him, your gaze meeting again. Taking in his deep brown eyes and soft smile brings... Old feelings from years ago bubble back up.

Your mouth opens to say something, anything at all. But the words won't come out as your heartbeat picks up speed.

That old crush you had on your old friend never really went away over all these years.

Or at least that's what you think at the moment.

#steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington x yn #stranger things #stranger things x reader #steve harrington x fem!reader #.𖥔 ݁ ˖ 𔓎 ݁˖ ݁𖥔 . wisp yaps

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ottiliere · 3 hours

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read the first chapter of the grief complex a few days ago and i can't stop thinking about it. i love how much characterization was packed into just the first chapter-- yr usage of colors is also sooo unbelievably gorgeous. i really like cam and lynn both, i'm very interested to see more of them (i have listened to both their playlists several times and i must say.. excellent song choices. pinback!!!) does lynn make any friends at raves? what does he do for work?

Thank you! I keep seeing iterations of the "can't stop thinking about it" kind and it's so exciting that this has resonated with some people so much. The playlists were all dane, though! I only suggested two of the songs that wound up on Cam's playlist (Eels + Guided by Voices). You didn't ask, but those playlists are diegetic. Cam's was a present (he's not really the music type...) and Lynn's was self made.

Lynn considered many professions before going to college. He was talked out of most of them by both his therapist and father. These include:

Nursing: Lynn is too temperamentally sensitive for it; poor outcomes would drastically affect him in a way he'd take with him outside the workplace, and besides that... belligerent patients would hurt his feelings too much! Nursing also requires too much quick-thinking + an ability to adapt to/perform in high-stress situations. Lynn is not smart, nor is he the type of guy you should depend on in case of an emergency; he doubts himself too much. Patients would have loved him, though. He is very sweet.

Programming/SWE: while comparably more knowledgeable in computers than his peers at the time, lynn has always been very poor with language/grammar and would not do well in a job that requires writing, even if it was conceptually understood as "writing with (a lot of) math." he has been in remedial reading classes from when he finally got an IEP in elementary school through college graduation.

Joining the Clergy: lynn is not incredibly religious, but he did briefly consider being a priest. this was more of a passing thought for him. it seemed like it would be nice, helping people like that. his faith has fluctuated and changed throughout his life, largely depending on who he's spending the most time around, but he's always been fond of the social aspect of religion.

Lynn makes tons of friends at raves! He's very social online, especially for his era, and he has a little long-distance friend group that he often links up with at raves. He's also been known to DJ on occasion...he's quite good at it.

By day, though, he is a junior accountant at a local oil company. A little less "cool", possibly morally debatable, but his his bills are paid and his apartment is quite nice.

#impressionable teen boy on alt.music.techno what will happen to him #lynn nilson #lucy art #ask #the grief complex #he was talked into the private sector by his father who is also an accountant and is acutely aware #that public accounting would be too rough on lynn. which was the correct decision #because he already works too much overtime as it is. he doesn't even have to!#regarding your second ask though…you're certainly sharing cam's thought process! but i wonder why he might want to do something like that…?

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runariya · 3 months

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Drive to Survive (JJK) • Chapter 4 “Call Me Baby”

pairing: F1driver!Jungkook x female race engineer!reader genre: colleagues2L, formula1!AU, racing!AU, drama, kind of fantasy/cyborg!AU fic rating: 18+, MDNI warnings: hangover after heavy drinking, cursing, Trish is a B, MC is in denial it's sad, jealous Jungkook, sweaty Jungkook, conflicts, they're both a mess word count: ~5.860

🎵 DJ ROOTS feat. CAMO, Jung Jinhyeong - BABY 🎵

a/n: This work is purely fictional. All characters and events are entirely imaginary and do not reflect reality. Content errors related to the sport of Formula 1 are not excluded. Please do not use this story as your own. No translations are allowed without permission. Thank you for understanding! 💕

01 • 02 • 03 • series masterlist • 05

The harsh bathroom light sears every nerve from your eyes to your brain. The noise of rummaging through your cosmetic bag for painkillers echoes painfully loud inside your skull. Your throat parched and stomach queasy, you feel on the brink of vomiting, the acrid taste of last night's alcohol lingering like regret on your tongue.

You never imagined you'd find yourself in this state, insisting you could handle your drinks to Jungkook, when in reality, you've always been a lightweight. Parties were never your scene; even at family gatherings or scholar celebrations, you barely sipped champagne before calling it quits.

But Jungkook being his annoying self, you just couldn’t admit that you never really drank. Admitting it after insulting him felt unfitting. Now, you wish you could turn back time and be your boring self, instead of showing him firsthand what a liar you were.

Oh god, the thought of what you did to both him and Mingyu embarrasses you so deeply that you could cry. The idea of facing either of them without cringing internally seems impossible.

Finally locating the painkillers, you swallow two dry, unwilling to risk upsetting your stomach further with water. After brushing your teeth twice, you repeat the process three more times after your shower for good measure.

Feeling somewhat human again and able to face race day, you check your phone for the time. Thankfully, you had the foresight to set an alarm for noon before the alcohol took over, knowing the team's pre-race briefings and preparations start soon.

Since Jungkook had asked you to fetch him for the track, you knock on his hotel room door at the end of your floor shortly after. Instead of Jungkook, Trish opens the door in her sports gear, not surprising considering her role as his personal trainer and physical therapist—a necessity for peak physical condition, especially before a race.

What does surprise you is Jungkook emerging from the bathroom in nothing but a towel around his waist. You ignore Trish's smug look, focusing only on Jungkook's stunned expression, eyes as wide as yours as he halts his movements. Memories of catching them flirt in the past flash through your mind, but you never expected this. Naively thinking a dedicated professional like him would get sidetracked.

Your initial shock turns to disgust, then settles into a hangover-induced indifference which doesn’t waste your remaining energy. Jungkook reacts swiftly, hurrying to his closet without turning back.

"Trish, I'll need you pre-race this evening; until then, you're free," he says, his tone brisk and business-like as he moves with lightning speed..

Trish shoots you a death glare, a reaction you've grown accustomed to ignoring. The painkillers aren't doing much, and you're too drained to expend any energy on her or his antics.

"Sure, bye Jungkook," Trish replies in a falsely cheery voice that grates on your ears like nails on a chalkboard. It's a sound you never minded before, but today, under the weight of your hangover, it's too much to bear.

Jungkook steps towards you, his shirt not quite yet fully on, giving you a peek of his abs. “I’m ready, let’s go.”

You’re impressed by his speed in getting dressed but say nothing as you turn around and walk down the corridor, Jungkook falling into step beside you. His presence is both comforting and a bit unnerving, considering last night’s events.

“Are we going to speak about the night before?” Jungkook smirks, his voice tinged with playful curiosity.

“About me, no. About Mingyu, yes.” You say curtly. “We were right, something’s fishy about him.”

Jungkook watches you expectantly, his interest piqued.

“When I touched his neck, I could feel something metallic. He said it was his necklace, but it didn’t feel like it. It was too wide for that. And his thigh also felt strangely firm,” you explain, your voice steady but low.

“So that’s why you wanted to touch my thigh that bad,” Jungkook realises, his face falling a bit.

You send him a sharp side-eye, not wanting to entertain memories of your drunken behaviour. His comment doesn’t sit well with your pounding headache and the knot of anxiety tightening in your stomach.

As you step outside, the heat hits you like a wall. The sun is merciless, blinding you momentarily. You fumble in your purse for your sunglasses, feeling the full force of your hangover returning. The sweltering humidity wraps around you, amplifying your discomfort. Fortunately, the paddock is only a few steps away, your hotel situated conveniently in the heart of the track.

"It'll be best to keep our assumptions about Mingyu between us until we gather enough evidence that something's off."

Jungkook hums in agreement, but after a short silence, not respecting your boundaries as usual, he starts. „You know, you looked kinda jealous back there.“

You’re not sure where this question comes from and why he likes to turn every conversation of yours around without warning. After yesterday, when you crossed the line left and right, you can’t blame him for his boldness. His question hangs in the air, a challenge you’re not ready to face. You can feel his eyes on you, waiting for a reaction.

„Of who? Trash? TRISH! I mean Trish.“ Your voice trails off. Could this day be any worse?

„So you were jealous of her being in my room.“ The smile he sends you is brighter than the sun burning down on you. „You’re wondering if we fuck, aren’t you?“

„Ewww, no. Why would I?“ You scrunch your nose in disgust. „You’d basically be sleeping with a prostitute if that were the case.“

„Why are you disgusted? She’s not a prostitute. I bet you’d want a piece of this.“ He thrusts his hips playfully.

„First, again, ew. Second ,could you please stop obsessing over me? And third, even if your physiotherapist is a 50-year-old hairy man named Barry, it would still be prostitution.“

„What? No, why?“ He looks genuinely shocked.

„Because you’re paying her, Jungkook.“ You sigh, wondering why he can’t see the point.

„I’m paying you too, so it’s no different.“

„No, the team’s paying me because I’m their employee as much as you are. We’re basically colleagues. But she’s employed by you. It’s you who’s paying her to do god knows what.“ You try to reason.

„So you’re saying you’re not into boss-employee roleplay but into forbidden love affairs between colleagues?“

„I’m into these data I’m carrying with me. And I’m absolutely into you…“ You stop to face each other, patting his chest firmly which feels solid under your palm, the heat radiating from his shirt. „…into you winning this race so you stop being a little shit and start seeing me as a necessity for your career, not your fantasies.“

„So you do like me, at least.“ He beams, as you shake your head incredulously and start walking again. Just to rile him up a bit more, you say loudly, not looking back “Not the point, JK. You aren’t my type.”

„WAIT! What’s your type?“ Jungkook calls out behind you, but his question hangs in the air as you step into the meeting room, leaving him without an answer.

The unbearable heat clings to everything, even though it's evening. The Singapore track feels more like an oven. Despite the oppressive humidity, the crowd's energy is electric, cheering and full of anticipation as the drivers get ready. Jungkook, focused and determined, slips into his car in his black driver’s gear, the familiar routine calming your nerves.

"Radio check, Jungkook," you say, your voice steady despite the anxious flutter in your chest. "Make sure to tell me if the heat gets to you."

"Copy that," Jungkook responds, his voice crackling through the radio. "I'll keep you posted."

The formation lap goes smoothly, with Jungkook settling into his position at P2, just behind Mingyu on pole, with George at P3. As the cars line up, the tension in the air is palpable, and the lights go out, signalling the start of the race.

The first half of the race is a tough battle. Jungkook and Mingyu fight relentlessly for the first position, their cars almost touching at times. The narrow track and sharp corners lead to multiple crashes, and the safety car slows down the race three times. Each restart brings a fresh wave of excitement, but also a gnawing fear of more accidents. The harsh artificial lighting casts long shadows on the uneven track, making every lap a challenge.

"Jungkook, how are you holding up?" you ask through the radio as the race nears the halfway mark. The sweltering heat and relentless pace are taking their toll on everyone.

"I'm starting to feel it," Jungkook admits, his voice strained. "The humidity and heat... it's rough."

"Remember to drink," you instruct, your own sweat tingling down your back even though you’re only sitting at the pit wall. "Take deep breaths. Let's do some breathing exercises."

Jungkook follows your lead, and you guide him through a series of deep, calming breaths. The brief moment of respite seems to help, but as he pushes closer to Mingyu, his aggression increases. You can hear the tension in his voice as he curses and see it in his driving.

"Don't push too hard," you warn him. "We can't afford a crash. Stay focused."

The race's brutal conditions continue to take their toll. The uneven track and glaring lights make it a test of endurance as much as skill. You can sense Jungkook's frustration and exhaustion, and the data shows heavy tyre degradation.

"Jungkook, pit this lap," you command. "Your tyres are short. Be careful with the pit lane entry."

Jungkook protests, his voice interrupted by rapid breathing through the radio, "I can stay out a bit longer. I can push."

But you insist, your tone firm and unwavering, "Jungkook, you need to pit now. Trust me on this."

"Copy," Jungkook replies reluctantly, guiding his car into the pit lane with precision. The pit stop is clean, a well-oiled machine of teamwork, and Jungkook retains his position.

As the race enters its final lap, over two hours since the start, Jungkook makes a daring attempt to overtake Mingyu. But just as he closes in, Mingyu seems to flip a switch, pulling away with inhuman speed and precision. The checkered flag falls, and Jungkook crosses the line in second place, a respectable finish given the conditions.

Jungkook staggers out of his car, every step a testament to the gruelling battle he has just endured. With a trembling hand, he removes his helmet, revealing flushed cheeks and bloodshot eyes. Sweat pours off him in rivulets, soaking through his racing suit and plastering his hair to his forehead. His face, usually so composed and confident, is now a mask of sheer exhaustion, etched with the strain of the race. He sinks to the ground beside his car, his body sagging against the tyres as he heaves for air, each breath coming in laboured gasps. The team quickly surrounds him, offering words of congratulations, clapping him on the back and shoulders, their voices a murmur of encouragement in the otherwise noisy paddock. Despite their enthusiasm, it's clear that Jungkook is too drained to fully register their praise, his focus entirely on regaining his breath.

You spring up from the pit wall, heart pounding with a mix of relief, that he didn’t crash in one of the most challenging tracks, and worry about his condition. Clutching a mini fan and a water bottle, you weave through the throng of people, your only thought to reach Jungkook. As you approach, you see the weariness etched into every line of his body, the toll of the race evident in the way he slumps against his car. Squatting down in front of him, you offer him the water while pointing the fan into his face, your movements gentle and careful. Jungkook takes the water bottle with a nod of gratitude, his eyes meeting yours briefly before he tilts his head back to drink. The cool water seems to revive him slightly, his shoulders relaxing a fraction as the liquid soothes his parched throat. His eyes, filled with deep gratitude, convey a silent thank you as he gulps down the water. You hold the fan closer, the soft whirring noise a comforting background to the chaotic sounds of the paddock. For a moment, it's just the two of you, a quiet island of calm in the midst of the bustling team.

It’s Wednesday after the intense Singapore race, and you find yourself back at the Mercedes headquarters. The familiar surroundings and mild climate offer a much needed reprieve from the recent weekend. You’re thankful that the media didn’t capture any candid photographs of your drunken state. However, more and more articles have begun to speculating about Mingyu, despite his newcomer status in the Formula 1 scene. He’s already proving to be a polarising figure, drawing both admiration and criticism alike.

You’re chatting with George in the corridor leading to your office, sharing a laugh about the sweltering heat of the last race and his commendable fourth-place finish. Suddenly, Jungkook strides over, a frown etched on his face.

“Why do I always see you flirting with others and not working?” Jungkook's voice cuts through the conversation like a knife.

You turn to him, irritation bubbling up. “Let me breathe,” you reply, perplexed by his accusation. Flirting? The very idea is absurd. You’ve never flirted with anyone at work, least of all with George. If you'd ever flirted with someone, it was with Jungkook and Mingyu when you were drunk, which, in your opinion, doesn’t count. Your discussion had been purely professional.

George, equally perplexed and visibly annoyed, steps in to defend you. “That’s not nice, Jungkook.”

But Jungkook, taking it personally, barks back at George, “What? It’s true!”

“It’s not,” you argue simultaneously with George, who adds, “You’re the biggest hypocrite in this building. Talk to you later, ___.” With a shake of his head, George turns and walks away, leaving you to deal with Jungkook’s irrationality.

George calling Jungkook a hypocrite strikes you as true. You’re sick of seeing him flirt with everyone, a behaviour that’s become painfully obvious over time. It baffles you how such a talented driver, admired by millions, constantly seeks artificial validation from the women around him. The disparity between his public persona and his private neediness repulses you a bit, making it hard to reconcile the two images of him in your mind.

“What’s your problem?” you demand, turning fully to face Jungkook, your anger causing you to step closer.

“There’s no problem,” he retorts, looking down at you, unyielding.

You feel your frustration rising, pushing you to get into his face. “Of course there is. What’s with you?”

Jungkook’s tone turns taunting, “Why are you talking to him?”

You throw your hands up in exasperation. “Why wouldn’t I? He’s our colleague!”

“You’re my race engineer!” Jungkook nearly shouts, his voice echoing through the hall as he points to his chest.

Matching his volume, you counter pointing in the direction of where George disappeared, “And his is Joongki, so what’s your point?” The silence that follows confirms what you already suspected: Jungkook is being entirely unreasonable. He’s not capable of having a normal conversation with you right now. “You’re unbelievable, Jungkook, truly. Don’t talk to me until you can speak to me like a normal person.”

You turn to head back to your office, needing to distance yourself from his erratic behaviour. Just as you’re about to leave, Jungkook calls after you, “I never slept with her!”

His words make you pause. They shouldn’t cause the wave of relief that surges through you, but they do. It shouldn’t matter, but it does. Despite the satisfaction you feel from his revelation, you know you need to maintain your distance. The last few days have taken you into dangerous territory, and this conversation, along with his unreasonable mood swings, is testament to it. Without turning back, you give the only response you can muster.

“I don’t care.”

The week continues in a tight dance between maintaining a professional distance and befriending Jungkook, the fight of last week forgiven but not forgotten. You’re torn between setting boundaries as sturdy as possible and letting him get near, something that’s inevitable and necessary as his race engineer. Hours working together and the trust and friendship needed between you not leaving much room for being distant for a long period of time. So when the second week in Brackley arrives and there’s only four days to the next race weekend this time in Monaco, you find yourself with Jungkook in the briefing room discussing the coming weekend.

“It’s looking clear on Saturday and Sunday, Friday a little bit of rain, but I’m not convinced of the weather forecast,” you report, studying the weather data on the screen.

“Hm, I need to nail the qualifying regardless of the weather. I won’t be able to overtake much on this track,” Jungkook responds, his gaze serious as he contemplates the upcoming challenges, swivelling in his seat left to right.

“Yeah…I’ve been calling some contacts of mine.” You change the topic now that all is set, playing with your pen while seated across from Jungkook. His eyes bore into yours, waiting for your next move.

“I’m trying to get the telemetry data for Mingyu’s heart rate and performance data for potential anomalies during the last race.” you explain, noticing Jungkook’s concern flicker across his face.

Jungkook nods thoughtfully. “Make sure this stays undetected and we stay safe.”

You reassure him with a small smile. “Don’t worry, I know how to navigate these waters discreetly.”

Just then, a knock on the door interrupts your discussion. A tall, buff man with light brown hair and trainers enters the room. You’re momentarily caught off guard by his presence and find yourself subtly mesmerised by his appearance. He walks further into the room, standing tall before the table, “Hey, I’m Kim Namjoon. Jungkook’s new personal trainer and physiotherapist.” Jungkook looks visibly annoyed at your reaction.

Gathering yourself enough to extend your hand to shake Namjoon’s, you introduce yourself airily. His hand is big and warm, his demeanour welcoming despite Jungkook’s evident displeasure. Namjoon then turns to Jungkook unfazed “You ready for your training session?”

Interrupting Namjoon, you turn to Jungkook with curiosity. “Wait, where’s Trish?”

Jungkook grumbles in response, “I fired her.”

Your features light up with surprise, momentarily betraying your intrigue. You turn to Namjoon, your smile bright like a tree on Christmas.

“Namjoon, could you please wait outside for a second? I need to talk to her in private.” Jungkook says with barely concealed hostility.

“Sure, no problem.” Namjoon replies, sending you a dimpled smile as he exits the room.

As soon as the door closes behind Namjoon, Jungkook whisper-shouts at you, “What’s wrong with you?”

“Oh, let me live. He’s a snack.” you remark casually, rolling your eyes as you gather your things with a smirk.

“And I’m a five-star Michelin. Eyes up here, dwarf,” Jungkook retorts sharply, pointing to his face.

“Pardon?” You look up at Jungkook, taken aback by the insult he has used since day one.

“You heard me. Stop flirting with my physio!” Jungkook gestures towards the closed door as you both round the table, now standing before each other, closer than colleagues normally would.

“I didn’t even say anything to him! And five-star? You can only achieve three, genius,” you tease lightly, a grin playing on your lips as your eyes meet his.

“Not the point, ___,” Jungkook groans, crossing his muscular arms over his chest.

“But he’s cute,” you playfully pout with a sweet voice.

Jungkook pushes his tongue against his cheek in annoyance, not seeing the fun in your conversation.

“Okay, okay. I’ll behave, pinky promise,” you concede half-heartedly.

“Where’s your pinky?!” Jungkook hisses, clearly exasperated.

“Oh, you’re for real? I should really stop flirting with him?” you ask with genuine surprise, tinged with a hint of sadness.

Jungkook’s glare sends shivers down your spine. Reluctantly, you hold out your pinky to Jungkook.

“Good girl,” Jungkook praises you, causing you to blush furiously as he starts teasing again. “Oh, you’re into praise now?” It’s Jungkook’s turn to tease you again, his eyes lighting up as yours did minutes ago.

“I’m so done with you, it’s not even funny anymore.” You grumble as you walk to the door.

“What? No need to be pissed now. I just made it clear that he’s mine and you’re mine…”

Interrupting Jungkook, you seize the opportunity to turn the tables yet again. “Yours now, you say?”

Jungkook turns red, his face and ears lighting up like neon signs in the dark. Your laughter echoes through the room as you reach for the door handle. “So you’re the possessive kind. Oh, this day is gold.”

As you walk out the door, you bid Namjoon a quick goodbye in passing. Sensing his gaze on your back, it’s Jungkook’s angry and hushed voice behind you that confirms what you assumed.

“Stop staring at her ass or you’re fired.”

You sit pensively in front of the pit wall in Monaco beside Joongki, the lingering rain from Friday's training session still a fresh memory. Despite the weather's unpredictability, your strategic tyre choice for Saturday's qualifying paid off remarkably well. Just like in Singapore, Mingyu's performance surpassed expectations, effortlessly outpacing Jungkook's best time by a significant margin, securing pole position while Jungkook settled again for P2.

You spent the entirety of last night navigating the delicate balance of calming Jungkook's frustrations and ensuring fair play regarding Mingyu's achievements until you find clear evidence against him. You tried to reason with Jungkook, also urging him not to get sidetracked by Mingyu and to stay focused on himself, especially during the race.

This morning, amidst the usual pre-race bustle, you managed to obtain Mingyu's telemetry data, a critical piece for understanding his performance. However, your primary focus remained on Jungkook, keeping him cantered and motivated amid the mounting pressure. Despite the distractions, you made a mental note to review Mingyu's data thoroughly back at headquarters to uncover any insights that could confirm your suspicion about him. The responsibility weighs heavily on you as Jungkook’s race engineer, balancing technical analysis with the delicate task of managing Jungkook's competitive spirit.

In a quiet moment before any preparations started, your curiosity led you to sneak into the RedBull paddock, where you noticed something peculiar about Mingyu's racing gear. Hidden metallic knobs on the inside of his suit's back caught your attention, prompting you to discreetly snap photos with your phone. The implications of such modifications could be significant, potentially raising questions about regulatory compliance.

Just as you neared some more equipment, someone suddenly approached, forcing you to quickly and quietly make your exit. You found it frustrating because you were certain there was more potential evidence to uncover. Regardless, you surprisingly discovered that running silently in heels was actually possible—something you never thought could be done, but you proved yourself wrong.

Amidst the buzz of the race day morning, you reflect on the meticulous planning and unforeseen discoveries that define your role by now. The intense rivalry between Jungkook and Mingyu fuels the atmosphere, requiring not just technical prowess but also astute observation and strategic manoeuvring. With Mingyu unexpectedly claiming pole position, the stakes are higher than ever, especially since a win for Mingyu today would mean he’ll surpass Jungkook in points. This demands your full attention and expertise. As you glance over Mingyu's telemetry data and the photos of his modified racing gear on your phone, you brace yourself for a day of strategic decisions and calculated risks, knowing that each move could tip the scales in favour of Jungkook's success or unravel amidst the fierce competition.

"Radio check." Jungkook's voice echoes in your ears, snapping you out of your thoughts and making you look up to the screen, which shows that the formation lap has already started.

"That's my line!" You joke, but deep down, you're grateful that Jungkook has woken you from your thoughts.

"Thought we'd try something new." He laughs lightheartedly back, settling into P2 as one by one, the cars line up for the Grand Prix of Monaco.

"Jungkook, stay sharp at the start. Remember, turn one can be chaotic. Lights out in five, four, three, …" Your voice crackles through the radio as Jungkook's car roars off the grid. The narrow streets of Monaco funnel the pack into a tight formation. Jungkook is right behind Mingyu, hugging the inside line, the screech of tyres echoes through the city.

Your attention is divided between Jungkook and Mingyu. There's something about Mingyu that always seems a bit off—his performance is almost too perfect. "Stay sharp and close to Mingyu," you advise Jungkook, watching as they both head into the tight Sainte Dévote turn. Mingyu's car glides through with a precision that raises your suspicions. The narrow streets and close barriers of Monaco heighten the tension, but Jungkook is managing well, matching Mingyu's pace. As they approach Mirabeau, you can’t help but notice how Mingyu seems to pull away with an ease that feels unnatural, fuelling your doubts.

"Clean start, Jungkook. Focus on warming up those tyres. Next is the climb to Massenet. Remember, it's all about rhythm here."

"Got it," Jungkook responds, his voice steady and focused.

At lap ten, Jungkook navigates the descent carefully, deftly manoeuvring through the narrow streets. The barriers seem to close in this time, but he threads the needle with precision.

"Great job through Casino Square, best one this race so far. Keep it tidy through Mirabeau. There's debris on the track, watch for it."

"Copy that. The car feels good," Jungkook replies, his confidence evident.

As Jungkook navigates turns 5 to 7, tackling one of the slowest corners in F1, you seize the moment to praise him, aiming to keep his spirits high even in the early stages of the race.

"Nice and smooth through the Grand Hotel Hairpin. Good work. Watch your exit at Portier, it's critical for the tunnel."

"Got it," Jungkook affirms.

As Jungkook enters the tunnel, the car's sound changes, a low thunder reverberating against the walls. Emerging into the blinding sunlight at the Nouvelle Chicane, he hits the brakes hard, downshifting rapidly while maximising the exit speed through the left-right chicane.

"Beautiful through the chicane. Now keep it clean through Tabac and prepare for the swimming pool section."

"Understood. I'm on it," Jungkook confirms.

Mid-race, a tense moment unfolds as Charles Leclerc of Ferrari and Valtteri Bottas of Alfa Romeo get too close, leading Valtteri to hit the barrier in a tight corner. The impact ruins his car, forcing him to drop out of the race. From the chatter on the Alfa Romeo radio, you quickly gather that his race is over.

"Yellow flag, sector two. There's been an incident at the swimming pool. No overtaking until it's clear."

Jungkook's pace steadies as he approaches the caution zone. Marshals wave flags, signalling the caution.

"Slow down and be ready to stop if needed. Once you're clear, push again."

"Will do. I see the flags," Jungkook acknowledges.

The wreckage of Alpha Romeo is cleared quickly, and the track returns to green.

"Green flag, go, go, go! You're clear."

Some laps pass when Jungkook dives into the pits as you call, "Box, box, box!" The team swarms the car, changing tires with lightning speed.

"Good stop. You're back out in clean air. Push now, this is your chance."

"I'm on it. Let's make this count," Jungkook says with determination.

Mingyu exits the pits just as Jungkook flies by, a perfect undercut.

"You're in the lead! Great job. Now let's manage the pace and protect those tyres."

"Yes! I'll keep it smooth," Jungkook replies, a hint of excitement in his voice.

On lap 25, you receive word from the engineers stationed at HQ in Brackley that rain is on its way.

"Weather update: slight chance of rain in the next 15 minutes. Stay focused and let us know if you see drops."

The tension builds as dark clouds gather over the Mediterranean. Jungkook's visor reflects the changing light as he continues to push.

"Will do. I'll keep you posted," Jungkook assures.

The rain reports come in, and you prepare for the inevitable pit stop, but you keep a close eye on Mingyu's performance. "Rain reported at the back of the circuit. How's the grip?"

"Starting to get slick in a few spots," Jungkook replies.

"Copy that. Be prepared to switch to intermediates if it gets worse."

The first drops hit the circuit, making the already treacherous streets even more perilous. Soon the drops start falling quicker, but not quite poring yet, you notice Mingyu's car handling the slick conditions with an almost uncanny stability. Despite the worsening weather, Mingyu’s pace doesn’t falter, making you wonder if there’s something more to his setup. Every lap, as the rain intensifies, your suspicion grows, but you focus on guiding Jungkook through the treacherous conditions.

"Box for inters, box for inters," you call.

Jungkook pits smoothly, the team executing a flawless tyre change.

"Good stop. Now careful on the out-lap. Conditions are tricky."

Jungkook's car skates slightly as he exits the pits, but he controls it expertly, finding the grip. "Got it. I'll take it easy," Jungkook says.

"How are the tyres now?" you ask.

"Feels good. Better grip now," Jungkook responds, his voice calm.

"Excellent. Mingyu is close behind, try to extend the gap."

As Jungkook pushes his car to its limits in the intensifying rain, you watch with heightened alertness, poised to make split-second decisions as needed.

"Rain is getting heavier. Stay focused. You're doing amazing."

It’s three laps later when the visibility drops as the rain intensifies even more, but Jungkook's precision remains unmatched. He navigates the treacherous turns with skill, maintaining his lead.

"You're handling this perfectly. Keep it up."

"Thanks, babe. Staying sharp," Jungkook replies.

There’s a momentary silence that stretches across the whole team, only interrupted by a few giggles. You’re taken off guard by the pet name Jungkook throws your way, more than sure it was an accident. The only response needed is something that’ll keep the media off your back. So, comparing yourself to the little pig named Babe comes to mind.

“I told you to stop calling me that pig. I’m not that short.” You force a laugh through the radio, hoping Jungkook catches the wink.

“Not going to happen, oink oink,” you hear Jungkook cringe in his voice.

It hurts listening to this conversation, and you mentally face-palm yourself. This will be the talk of the whole paddock and the media.

Nearing the end of the race, there’s another incident. This time, it’s Lando Norris of McLaren who touches the barriers. Despite the contact, Lando manages to keep driving slowly, and from the chatter on the McLaren radio, you gather that he'll be able to continue.

"Full course yellow. Safety car deployed. Slow down and maintain position."

A collective breath is held as the safety car gathers the field.

"Okay, safety car is in this lap. Get ready for the restart."

"Ready. Let's do this," Jungkook responds, his hands steady on the wheel.

"Green flag. Go, go, go!"

Jungkook accelerates smoothly, pulling away from the pack. The rain continues to fall, but he keeps control, dancing through the puddles.

"Perfect restart. Gap to P2 is 2.1 seconds."

"Got it. I'll keep pushing," Jungkook affirms.

"Five laps to go. Keep it steady, Jungkook. You're almost there."

The rain eases slightly, but the track remains wet. Jungkook's concentration never wavers. "Just bring it home now."

"Understood. Almost there," Jungkook replies.

"Three laps. Gap is stable. Don't take any risks."

Jungkook's car glides through the final turns, the roar of the crowd growing louder.

"Got it. Staying cautious," Jungkook confirms.

As Jungkook enters the final lap, you find yourself perched on the edge of your stool, nerves taut with anticipation. "Final lap. You’ve got this."

As the final lap begins, the tension is at its peak. Jungkook leads, driving with the same precision and focus he’s shown all race, but Mingyu is right on his tail, a constant, unnerving presence. Your suspicions are confirmed when, in an almost superhuman move, Mingyu dives into the tight Rascasse turn with a speed and control that defy belief, overtaking Jungkook with a maneuver that seems impossible.

"What the... How did he do that?" Jungkook exclaims, livid, while you and the team look on with open jaws.

"Stay calm, Jungkook. Focus on maintaining position. Don’t ruin the car," you urge, trying to keep his mind in the game. It would be catastrophic if Jungkook were to crash his car in the final lap due to his anger-induced lapse in concentration.

Jungkook pushes hard, but Mingyu's car is now in front. He navigates the remaining turns with impeccable skill, but there's no chance to retake the lead.

As Jungkook crosses the finish line in second place, the team cheers for the podium finish despite the shock of the last-minute overtake.

"Jungkook, incredible drive. P2. We still made the podium," you say, concealing your own dropping miss with pride in your voice.

"Thanks, team. That was unreal. We'll get him next time," Jungkook replies, his voice dripping with irritation.

"Absolutely. Great job out there. We'll celebrate this one and come back stronger."

The crowd's cheers blend with the sound of the engine as Jungkook takes his cool-down lap.

As you navigate the bustling paddock after the award ceremony, your mind already drifting towards the upcoming debriefing with the team, a reporter intercepts your path. He insists on an interview, thrusting a microphone towards you with an air of urgency. Knowing that declining on live camera could escalate matters, you reluctantly agree. Keeping your composure, you suppress the nerves threatening to rise within you and prepare to face the inevitable scrutiny of the media.

"So, during the race, there was a moment where Jungkook called you 'babe' over the radio. Can you shed some light on that?"

"Ah, yes, Jungkook often uses playful nicknames for all of us on the team. It’s his way of keeping things light and maintaining the good mood under pressure. There’s really nothing more to it than that."

"But some spectators and fans are speculating if there might be something romantic brewing between you two. What would you say to that?"

You stay polite, your media smile in place, "Oh, you know how rumours can spread. Jungkook and I have a great professional relationship, focused entirely on our work here in Formula 1. The only love story I’m interested in at the moment is the one with my data." You gesture towards your tablet in your hand with a light chuckle only reserved for situations like this.

As you thank the reporter and head towards the debriefing area, you catch sight of Jungkook caught up in his own interview. He nervously scratches his neck, laughing and stealing glances in your direction. Under your breath, you mutter, "Fucking idiot."

01 • 02 • 03 • series masterlist • 05

a/n 2: lmk what you think in any way you like! please send me a message, ask or comment if you would like to be tagged for upcoming chapters 💕 also - character asks and drabble requests are open

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mossyivy · 7 months

Text

Hatred | '24 Alphabet Challenge

Steve Harrington x Fem!Reader

Summary: Prom night is supposed to be the greatest night of your teenage life... Right?

Words: 1.9k

Content Warning: Stancy mention, Jancy mention, past feelings mention, childhood friends, and unrequited love (Steve)