#do i need therapy? yes. whatever.
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A day in the life of my emotional trainwreck of a flesh prison:
Me: *on the floor, rocking back and forth, sobbing, while also laughing, while also talking to myself, while also smelling sound*
Me, 5 minutes later: *baking cupcakes* "if you're stressy and depressy clap your hands 👏👏"
#a day in the life of my emotional trainwreck of a flesh prison#part 1#probably#okay so i wasnt smelling sound but yk i was feeling way more emotion than i usually do on a day-to-day basis so it FELT like it#tw: emotion#??? idk i feel like this needs to be triggered warned somehow#tw: mention of mental breakdown#do i need therapy? yes. whatever.
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i am not anti sam but i sometimes find myself hating sam because some samgirls are super into bio/gender essentialism whether or not they realize it. sam is a woman and dean is a man and sam is the victim and dean is his abuser like what show are you watching?
#as much as we all like to have fun these are two cis men characters who have roles to play in the narrative they don’t escape#they are both being abused. we find this out *fully* in s14#but it’s always been present. this is the abuse sam and dean winchester show#but some of y’all don’t actually understand abuse! you think abuse is just being mean and yelling#‘sam is a woman because his autonomy is taken away’ your idea of womanhood is fucked up and you should unpack that#if you compare sam to a woman because he’s been SA’d then you are WEIRD. they are both men canonically getting SAd????#like yes dean has some weird stuff about his own gender that he needs to unpack but it’s part of a mask?? like if u genuinely#believe that he seriously 100% believes this stuff then you don’t know his character at all#and yes their relationship is toxic but if you think for one second that there’s a genuine power imbalance then you’re sorely mistaken#dean’s entire identity is based around taking care of sam. sam can do wrong but not enough to be truly held accountable#it doesn’t matter what he does. dean will always protect him and be there and do whatever it takes to save him. he will always forgive him#and sam knows this and uses it to his advantage. he repeatedly goes behind dean’s back and avoids the communication he says is so important#he blames dean for shit that isn’t his fault because he’s there#and no he may not fight dean on stuff but he can. he often doesn’t because he doesn’t want to!#they enable each other and they don’t grow because they can’t because there’s always something else BECAUSE THEY’RE BOTH BEING ABUSED BY GOD#they’re not allowed to take a break. they’re not allowed to slow down or stop or rethink it’s always the end of the world#so yes some of y’all annoy me with the ‘i wish dean was nicer in the midst of his trauma’#shit or saying that therapy fixes everything stuff or whatever#and the fact that so many of y’all use that to treat sam like some fragile white woman who can’t#have an opinion without her husband’s permission is WEIRD like your gender stuff is weird#and just repacked essentialism onto them. idc if you’re trans. unpack that shit cuz your meta is full#of rad fem friendly or adjacent shit if you refuse to talk about gender without using abuse as an argument#because that does not hold up in canon of these two FICTIONAL MEN!!! or in the real world#(edit: most of the stuff i see is by cis women but im saying ‘idc if ur trans’ bc it’s not exclusive to them)#supernatural#sam winchester#dean winchester#wank adjacent#maybe just straight up#fandom wank
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listen. LISTEN. I knoooowwwwwwwww that August has never been important enough for canon to ever bother expanding upon issues like this. I know, but...
In the pilot, we KNOW that Emma is lonely. We know this because she’s sat in her apartment, alone, celebrating her birthday by herself. It’s well established that Emma had no one she considered her family and has had extreme trouble connecting with people over the years (Neal, Lily and Ingrid as fleeting exceptions).
But August? Canon gives us NOTHING. We know almost NOTHING about his past in the Land Without Magic. We’re given the name of one (1) character (Isra) that he has a connection with (someone who is clearly not THAT important to him, as she’s never mentioned again ever) and that’s IT.
Emma stays in Storybrooke to begin with because of Henry, yes. But it’s not a particularly tough decision for her because, well...she has nothing to go back to anyway. And I can’t help but wonder how true that was for August as well? Like....??? did he bother to contact ANYONE when he thought he was dying???
August is a genuinely intelligent and charismatic character (albeit, a little obnoxious). I have no doubt that he has made friends + friendly acquaintances over the years. But close friends? People he can open up to about his past with and who won’t think he’s losing his mind? HIGHLY doubtful.
I know that the show didn’t really explore their friendship very much or expand on it in any meaningful way, but Emma and August’s relationship is sooooooooooo *chef’s kiss* to me. Yeah, they have genuine chemistry and a fun dynamic, yeah the ‘I can always tell when someone is lying to me’ character interacting with a character that is literally Pinocchio is funny af and surprisingly poetic. But also!!! These are two lonely, emotionally closed off characters that were essentially orphaned by their parents for 28 years that have both had shitty childhoods and have connected so genuinely with one another and I don’t know where I was even going with this but I love both of them so much and they both deserve this friendship and WHY WASN’T AUGUST AT EMMA’S WEDDING I’M STILL MAD ABOUT THIS OKAY
#sorry I actually don't know what this is#it's because it's August tomorrow. that/s all#I'm being weird about him#ANYWAY I JUST WANT THESE TWO TO TALK ABOUT THEIR SHARED PAST EXPERIENCES#(😏 which is something that I WILL be doing later in mim but shhhhhhh)#LICHERALLY losing my mind thinking about august's past#because emma had a shitty childhood (and adulthood) yes#but august has a whole ass past in the enchanted fucking forest!!!!!!! he;s LITEREALLY pinocchio and he has memories of that#and he can't talk to ANYONE about those memories or that past because3 they straight up wouldn't believe him!!!!!!!#and so either he HAS to let it go! OR ELSE he risks pushing that person away#OR EVEN WORSE he risks people thinking he needs to be put away somewhere or given serious therapy or whatever#*(he DOES need serious therapy. but that's not what I'm talking about here)#AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#having a normal one this evening guys#august meta#(I mean. BARELY. but I still want it in that tag)#august booth#ouat
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5 AM
Just me and my overactive mind facing the nighttime again 🙃
#hopefully the meds work but while waiting for them to kick in I get so damn nervous#and sometimes I do get nights where even on my full dose my anxiety is too overpowering and I just. Do Not Sleep#I mean I do eventually but not without spiraling first :')#way before I was prescribed sleep meds my longest was 3 nights without sleep while on a VERY stressful trip#I felt like I was gonna die and I did not sleep until I got off the plane and was back at home#(this was like 15 years ago already but it still haunts me fhfgsgdh)#my best friend and I were having a conversation today#and she was like 'not sleeping can make you hallucinate right?'#and I was like :') I get the hallucinations in other scenarios too#BUT I also get what she meant#not sleeping is really bad for me mentally which is why I can't do 'sleep restriction therapy'#and fun fact#a lot of my OCD obsessions revolve around sleep!!!#which is 'awesome' because laying in bed with insomnia makes my OCD flare up so like#the two get to feed off each other and make my life a living hell!!!#and don't even get me started on my sleep paralysis episodes#(which I like to think of as just my brain misfiring but that my aunt tells me is saints or demons trying to talk to me)#'cause she hallucinates too but hers are like 'spiritual' or whatever#same with my mom's hallucinations as well#and to add fuel to the dumpster fire of my mind and body is the fact I've been overcaffeinating again#which I've known not to do ever since I was in middle school and saw the pediatric cardiologist who specifically said 'hey don't do that'#fast-forward to adulthood and I still haven't learned how to handle anything#like. I have heart meds and sleep meds and migraine meds and IBS meds#and yes meds are good but like. I know you need to incorporate lifestyle changes as well#which I do for like 2 weeks until the next time I fuck up#I've been so irresponsible lately but like. ESPECIALLY today#didn't eat#took some meds on an empty stomach and forgot to take my other ones at all#had too much caffeine#stressed out over some stupid situations thanks to overthinking
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fuck, I hate telehealth, but ya know, I think I’d actually like it if it was in minecraft instead of a video call. Let’s do therapy in roblox or something.
#having a relationship with your therapist is unethical… but what about running a dungeon together in world of warcraft??#today we’re going to talk about my abandonment issues while we build a mountain base in minecraft together#shit… I was just joking but this is actually sounding kinda rad#but wowwee do I hate telehealth#I hate professional video calls#I always feel like I’m saying the wrong things or I’m not talking enough#my last psych appointment was telehealth and it suuuuuuucked#oh man I don’t even know if I ever posted about this#it just felt so awkward and I was always worried someone could hear me on the call through the apartment walls#and he was like basically ‘just try to think positive’#fuck you fuck you fuck you and also think about my butthole and fuck you#thanks for the meds but never say that shit to me again#like… my therapist is a cool guy. I ‘love him. or as much as you can love your doctor in a distant platonic way#he’s always so cool about ‘yeah your chemicals are all messed up’ and he’s doesn’t shut me down at least not without actually understanding#but my psych who works in the same office does telehealth and seems very distant and not great at talking about deeper issues#which is fine. really. I just needed a doc who’d give me a fair shake and help me with the medication side#but I have to do telehealth for him and it feels so awkward and shallow#can’t we just do a 5 minute phone call? ‘hello. can we up the dose of my meds? yes? okay thank you.’#I see you typing on your computer a lot. I’m not saying anything interesting. if you’re on neopets just say so#anyway I only thought about this bc I guess I COULD do telehealth therapy today or something#but like I said. telehealth feels awkward and I wouldn’t be able to open up over it#it’s cool tho for like… I dunno. people who can’t go in person or need quick visits or whatever#I’m not saying it’s not useful or a viable option. I personally just hate phone calls and video calls.#and I love video games bro 😎#and I love you#goodbye forever#text
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if you think shen jiu is “a rancid, horrible, radioactive level toxic of a man” fine, whatever, but please use an “anti” or “negativity” tag and not his primary tag. thank you!
As per suggestion I have removed it solely bc it might make people uncomfortable.
But also WHAT. DID YOU NOT READ THE DAMN POST HE IS CANONICALLY THAT.
#speechless.jpeg???????#anon he IS horrible. bc he abuse bingge what#and i EXPLICITLY said that i will fight poeple who woobify him.#bc of this i will need to clarify the deepest secret ive ever had in my stupid life:#yes. i am a shen jiu liker. his horrible aura and shitty demeanor captured me like a scientist to an interesting radioactive rock#HE HAS LAYERS AND IT WASN'T EXPLORED ENOUGH IN CANON#I wanna bite him so bad i wanna shake him like bones in my mouth#we could do so many things with his backstory and pidw canon!!!!! like fuck?? his view of himself is so so skewed#if i could ever write anything i wanna put him in therapy. lets go babygirl im dragging u to therapy#dont you DARE accuse me of being his anti or negativity or whatever when i was busy thinking about how can i make him and yqy in character#like actually thats so hard? both has different level of frequency and it hurtssssss#am i a shen jiu liker? yes. is he an asshole? yes.#he needs to stay that way even after slef discovery bc cang qiong need one sharp tongued full of suspicion and quick witted peak lord and#its not gonna be yqy#[borealis.mail]
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One thing I don't understand about retiring from sports is like. Is that just it? Never again? Like I get usually they still do some but like.. it's hard to imagine completely giving up something that consumed your life enough to get to a point where you Retire. Like even for me with my experience with hockey, I loved it, I miss it, but the reason I don't play at all anymore isn't just that I wasn't good and stood no chance in hell of playing in college, but the reason I don't play anymore is anxiety and fear of adult leagues. Also the point of that tangent is that I didn't retire I just Stopped. Because I wasn't good.
#i do miss it though#iicraft505#anyway this reminds me i need to go to open skate on Wednesday so I don't get a bad grade in therapy#I'm only gonna make it to one before my next therapy appointment which means I'm gonna get a bad grade in therapy#(something both normal to fear and possible to achieve)#also yes this is about tom i just like. so you'll never go to the local pool? it just doesn't make sense#the only other sports person i cared about this much was Wambach retiring#but like she wasn't good anymore. tom still has it. anyway.#I'm not arguing against retiring from your spoet i think that's fine and it was the right time or whatever but like. the Logistics#anyways. I don't get sport retiring. like the idea that they Never Do It Again just feels wrong.
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i haven't been this social & talkative in Years someone drag me out back
#rambling to myself in the tags just go ahead n pass by 🫡#u've been warned#i can feel the burnout(?) creeping up on me & its been. two days.#at least my friend is reassured i'm still in their life every few months 👍#even if i end up hating being dragged out places i know a little relief feels like a lot to other ppl#but i also just. hate being involved at all. esp if its pity but also when they genuinely want to talk with me. which sucks!#i hate thinking like that. however it just feels like the most logical path sometimes yk? after (gestures vaguely) everything?#i'm childishly obsessed with the aspect of destruction. me or them carrying it out it doesn't matter#any sort of socializing feels like grinding stone together whether or not their intentions seem as pure as possible#it feels like my socializing button is broken and my battery is locked at 2% 24/7#its not that i actively try to keep myself locked in self serving cycles to stay pitiful lord knows i hate being pathetic#i despise being miserable. it may not be Everything i know. it may be comfortable or familiar or whatever edgy shit#but it takes so much energy to have any emotion. i feel like i wrung myself dry in elementary school#ultimately i know i'm capable of Having Emotions. they're just all buried beneath 78 layers of static that don't seem to be there for other#i try to be social. even when i know Deep down i like them i end up hating every interaction. no matter how smooth or funny or whatever#i seem to have this blanket that makes everything heavier on me. i don't like being weighed down but sometimes i have to comply else#i know i'll just fucking crash out for the next however many years & end up being more hurt than i began with#<- metaphor doesn't make sense bc i ditched it half way thru but you get the point#be social to the complete detriment to my health & appease others or hurt other ppl (something i don't like doing bc i know how it feels) &#end up ''''saving'''' myself (trapping myself further. lose/lose). i wish i was completely exempt to people paying attention to me#i Hate wallowing in this fucking pity. this whole woe is me evvybody huwt me so now i feel nudding :( schtick makes me feel so weak#i like feeling strong by socializing. sometimes i get this litttlee inkling of maybe i should try & put myself out there More but it always#comes with the same results. one of these days surely it'll change (<- bearer of the curse) (<- but still has hope despite denying it)#yes i'm in therapy yes i'm working on my social capacity slowly instead of getting my boundaries ran over at top notch speed by my abusers#sometimes i need to say the self pitying shit out loud to knock me to my senses & be like 'if a friend said this i'd criticize them'#'if anybody else thought that you'd cringe so hard and be filled with That Specific Misery you feel & hate so much' ohhh right. my bad
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‘the most crucial skill that a good drinksmith needs is listening… drinksmithing is all about having conversations with your guests’
tea house owner!reader energy for real
#my mind shot straight there when siobhan said this in the hsr event#hey guys#what if i just steal the concept of the event and write a continuation?#the reader does spy on people and accept bribes for jobs blah blah blah#but they also offer free therapy over tea!#(but only if they like the person if course) (everyone else is getting eavesdropped on)#…i started writing this as a joke but hey it could be fun#if i ever write a continuation of that fic i might do something like that#high cloud quintet members coming for therapy after baiheng dies#reader helping couples talk through problems in their relationship calmly#i’m a sucker for characters who are very elusive and sneaky and cold but when it comes to it have a heart of gold#‘yes i will expose your enemy’s business blah blah but hang on let me help this lost child find their parents first’#‘oh you’re not being patient? you think your rivalry is more important than this child? actually you can keep the money and leave thank you#[turning to child] ‘now tell me where you last saw your parents’#and with their connections from the various dealings they’ve had around the xianzhou they’d be really good at dealing with these situations#and with regards to the jing yuan aspect of things i firmly believe he needs somebody with kindness and warmth in them to fall for them#reader can’t all be bribery and dodgy deals#imagining him coming to the shop one day to get some information they’ve gathered or whatever#and they’re like ‘shush not now i’m hearing this girl vent about her shit partner’#or doing something nice#and he falls even harder#sorry i have gone on an absolute tangent here#i don’t know what demon possessed me#maybe i will write a part two who knows#that reader would certainly be a fun one to flesh out#r’s random thoughts
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Honestly I think everything would be much better if I could think about everything much more and also much less
#as in 'this does not matter as much as you think it does but also you need to be putting time and effort into it'#in case you haven't noticed my general approach to things that i am not an expert in is throwing myself at them obsessively#and yes i can do anything i want to but god at what cost. starting to have to contemplate being a human being with limits and i dislike it#also i have GOT to do something about how checked out i've been. i was sitting in class thinking 'i think paying attention in class#would fix me' and i got so caught up in that that i missed like half of the discussion. like girl why don't you stop thinking so much#the thing about all of this is i know what the solution is but i don't like it#i think if i went to therapy someone else could figure out a compromise though. i'm notoriously all-or-nothing in my solutions#but i don't think it needs to be that way. i do think that regardless i'm not going to like it but whatever#perce rambles#tldr i need to take it down like five notches and also like just buckle down and do my work >:'0#but emphasis on the taking it down five notches. calm down sir
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I wish I had friends near meeeeeee to distract me from my brainnnnnnnnnn
#need to talk to anyone irl who isn’t related to me or dating my mom or my therapist#anyone else near me please I’m losing my mind#nature isn’t healing me sleeping in a fully dark room all day isn’t healing me how do I magically fix this without having to put any work#into it oh I can’t oh u have to do the work okay how do I do that. therapy once a week. oh. okay. yup.#can I speedrun it? oh no? I can’t. oh damn. okay fine whatever. therapy once a week. AND I HAVE TO ACTUALLY LISTEN AND DO WHAT SHE SAYS. bro#what the hell okay fine#well here I am !!!!! where is the fixing where is the feeling better I feel like all I do is stir up all these touch emotions from every#part of my life at once and then she sends me off to rot for week before I come back and talk again#I just feel like I’m losing it!!!!! and ik it’s extra bad bc birthday countdown is on in my brain and im stressed and i feel like a huge#fuck up that can never be fixed and like I will die having done nothing with my life except weigh other people down and so exhausting and my#brain won’t ever shut up like yes I get it years and years and years of built up shit that I never properly dealt with and still hold blame#for constantly and I feel like I will never be fixed like I CANT be fixed like this is a losing battle and I just am struggling today man#idk what I was saying I just took my morning weed hit to try and relax my back a little and now my brain is like scrambled eggs#which is good that means it’s working#I’m gonna try to take a nap maybe cause I only slept four hours and it was like choppy thru the night and then maybe I’ll go to the lake#later I’ve been feeling the need to be in a body of water recently
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If Errol ever got into a genuine relationship, it's because someone misinterpreted one of his threats as flirting, and it all snowballed from there because they went for it
to be fair to the awful biker man my tastes are bad and the red flags on him even ignoring the threats are innumerable
but red my favorite color so what it DO baybeeeee
more in tags ig if you want real damon ramble hours !
#damon.txt#erol#idk who you are jak and daxter anon but thank u...#i have no idea if my reads on characters are?? interesting to others but i'll write out some thoughts here i suppose!#erol's got a lot of?? frustrations as a person that i do not think any s/o could fulfill. like genuine to him is i think a yes man.#i definitely can see misinterpreting his threats as flirting tho. i mean i think that's what made my brainrot get this bad JKDHFJS#the SECOND his ego gets bruised he needs that reaffirmation/validation. idk if this makes any sense LOL#imo.. the two things he is committed to are whatever praxis says and his own ego. maybe torturing jak too tbh but mainly the other two#i accept the derangement i've been there too man. studying his brain under a microscope personally#the numerous atrocities are part of him and I've decided they're funny. cyber errol is very fucked but i liked him before it was cool#tl;dr this man needs. some form of therapy. or the electric chair. maybe even both /lh
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the way i have absolutely no business being the way i am
#horse.txt#vent //#sort of. too high to be sad abt it im in anthropology mode and listening to music that makes me feel sexy so its fine yk#anyway i typed a whole bunch of other tags talking abt how and why i feel this way by going through a few of the events i can remember#from my childhood that Might explain why im so emotionally guarded and struggle to open up anymore.#bc i Wanted to say they all felt dumb and juvenile esp since ive actually like#made peace with most of the ppl who were involved with them#but the Anthropology mode was just tearing it all down as i typed it bc that Is just a ridiculous way to look at it no matter how you cut it#doesn't matter that nobody involved really Meant to deal that kind of harm and i dont need to hate or blame anyone in order to acknowledge#that it still just Happened. like thats a Memory already babe no do overs.#which is kind of just accidental therapy so sick. love that fir me genuinely!#but also yes theres the bitch part of me that still wants to discredit it bc acknowledging that it happened =/= Fixing My Issues#so im still at square one technically. ive just been pacing in circles on it for a while ig#EVEN WORSE that the Scale of my issues is so incredibly mundane compared to so many of the people i seem to meet.#sitting in bed crying abt not having friends for a few days in elementary school when other ppl have jojos bizarre adventure levels of Lore#i know im not technically invalid for feeling the way i do or anything but god. if it doesn't feel fucking Embarrassing to open up about😭#its impossible NOT to feel stupid and sensitive for having these first world ass problems. And letting them hold me back#bc ppl not liking me for any reason makes me sooooooooo fucking scared So fucking scared its not even funny 😝#at least. ppl in my Circles. im pretty ok about being assertive with randos#still some work to be done on it but its better than whatevers going on with my personal relationships rn#sincerely to my mutuals and loved ones who see this i swear to GOD i love you so so so fucking much and im so. im trying to figure out this#the stuff thats got me so distant and bad at keeping in touch. its a whole slew of feelings about how i see Myself--not yall#i double pinky promise cross my heart im extremely serious#thank you for being patient with me you mean more to me than im capable of putting into words right now#alright theres a shot of tears in the hollow of my collar bone time to wrap up this post#daily reminder that i love body hair. there's some honesty.#😎😎😎💪💪💪#the Quaritch under the cut is just to make me feel better bc i love him and i think hes so pretty. hes like a security blanket
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it really is wild my mom and i will be all doting one minute and absolutely pissed at each other the next it's fucking wild however i've put out the proposition that she stops treating me like an idiot and also like i don't need anything ever at the same time
#vall txt#if you saw how she treats my sister and i you'd think my sister was the youngest#parentified eldest daughter my lily white ass#she made me go to my physical therapy on foot not once but twice!!!!!#while i was suffering from horrible chronic pain just so she could do whatever the fuck with my sister in town#something my sister did not need her for at all#and she does shit like that all the time#and also says stuff that is rather one step behind for blaming me for things that wow ok ye sure my 13 year old self sure did all that uh u#doesn't help that i look at my dad and like i love him too but if i look at him for more than 20 minutes i start feeling a hatred so big#it could burn several houses down#sorry for the rant tho#i'm having a horrible night#am anxious for my cats vet visit tomorrow and because i was upset i also got some nice lil flashback lmao#sdfjkbsd vent over
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goodnight everyoine sleep well
#i only need like two more hours max to end all my school affairs so yes!!!!!!!! wonderful@@@!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#then i can draw or sims or do whatever until i get bored of it forevr.#and then i have therapy tomorrow and fly out on 10th#but hey. soon. freedom
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missed my classes today after doing something IVE DONE MY ENTIRE FUCKING LIFE [sleep harder after falling back asleep in the mornings]
guess who has to go to bed at 8:30 PM rather than 1am BECAUSE SHE MISSED ONE FUCKING DAY OF FUCKING ONLINE SCHOOL
#im gonna wake my child up at 7 somthing because shes in online school and usually gets up 30 min before her first class#and her first class today is at 8:30#and shes not gonna go back to sleep since she said 'ok' to me#charbeloved says#FUCKING HELL DAD I DID WHAT YOU DO#“if it takes you being bored out of your mind” I WILL START RETHINKING EVERYTHING AGAIN#THERES A REASON IM HAPPY NOW#ITS BECAUSE IM NOT TRYING TO SLEEP WITH THE LITTLE VOICE IN THE BACK OF MY MIND TELLING ME IM A WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT#AND ALL I DO IS FCUK THINGS UP AND MAKE EVERYTHING JUST THAT MUCH MORE DEPRESSING AND ANNOYING AND NOTHING I WILL DO WILL EVER BE GOOD ENOU#ADN THAT I DONT EVEN DESERVE TO LIVE OR THAT I DONT DESERVE SHIT#THAT LITTLE VOICE#WHEN I HAVE TO GO TO BED AT A REASONABLE HOUR AND NOT WHEN I JUST FALL ASLEEP THATS ALL I CAN FOCUS ON#YES MUSIC HELPS#BUT THAT DOESNT MEAN THAT STUPID VOICE ISNT LOUDER THAN USUAL#LIKE GOODNESS#I DONT CARE ABOUT THE WAY MY BODY CONTORTS WHEN I JUST FALL ASLEEP#BUT WHEN I HAVE TO FORCE IT ITS NEVER GOOD ENOUGH#I WILL NEVER BE GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU#AND IM SORRY ABOUT THAT#I NEED THERAPY AND I GET THATS EXPENSIVE#BUT THERES A LOT OF SHIT YOU DONT FUCKING KNOW ABOUT ME DAD#I NEED TO BE ABLE TO GO TO BED AT WHATEVER TIME#I ACTUALLY FALL ASLEEP *QUICKER*#I HAD A *SCHEDULE*#NOT ANYMORE MR.#LIKE I WILL SAY OKAY TO ANY AND EVERYTHING WHILE ASLEEP#YOU COULD ASK ME WHAT MY FAVORITE COLOR IS 'ok'
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