#does anyone actually like Rupert

[yourbeginneranimator]

Longk

[angie-words]

Rivals Interview & Photoshoot

CW for mentions of sex, nudity

Highlights from the article (abridged! Full article by Caitlin Moran here):

Jilly Cooper’s raunchy Rivals: ‘You will see a lot of willies’

It’s taken 36 years, but finally Jilly Cooper’s legendary bonkbuster Rivals is on TV. Caitlin Moran — who was such a fan, she changed her name to one of the book’s characters — meets the author and stars on set and asks: how was it for you?

Guess where I am.

Oh my gosh — I am in RUTSHIRE.

If you own one of the multimillion copies sold of Jilly Cooper’s infamous Rutshire Chronicles books, you will a) be as excited as me, and b) know exactly where I am.

Yes, I am standing in front of a beautiful, honey-coloured mansion.

Yes, it is a beautiful summer’s day.

Yes, the herbaceous borders are magnificent.

Yes, there are adorable dogs milling around.

Yes, there are champagne bottles strewn hither and yon.

And yes, everyone is dressed in alternately fabulous, or ridiculous, Eighties outfits, with gigantic hair.

The ladies have electric-blue eyeshadow and golden, heaving bosoms.

The men, meanwhile, have tanned legs, huge Rolexes — and, in many instances, their gigantic hair manifests lower down: in moustaches like that of Tom Selleck.

And yes, of course, there is drama. David Tennant — wearing a lavish, gold, silken man-blouse and sucking on a cigar — is furious. He is savaging a roomful of party people, all looking stricken — and all, incongruously, wearing swimwear.

“How the f*** has this happened?” Tennant screams, as all the tits and legs fidget, gaudy piña coladas abandoned. “Get the f*** out there and sort this out! And why are you all wearing bikinis?”

Tennant storms from the room, apoplectic with rage — and then sees me.

“Oh, hello, darling,” he says, all sweetness and light.

“CUT!” the director calls.

Today, David Tennant isn’t, of course, David Tennant. He’s Tony Baddingham, the infamous, nominative-determinist baddie of Jilly Cooper’s Rivals.

“So, is this fun?” I ask him.

The last time I saw him on set, he was being the Doctor in Doctor Who, in a floor-length coat, trying to save the world from being exploded. Again. In the rain. In Wales. At 1am.

“Oh yes,” Tennant says. “I mean, look at my blouse. It’s like my aunt’s! Actually, I think it might be hers — it closes right to left. Don’t men’s buttons close left to right? Am I wearing,” he asks the room at large, “a woman’s blouse?”

“We need to go again, David,” the director says.

“Back in a tick,” Tennant says, running back on set, sucking on his cigar. Getting ready to be really evil, and Eighties, again.

-----

When it comes to the atmosphere on set, I later talk to David Tennant about this subject.

“Yes — there was a lot of due diligence about only having … joyful people on set. Crew and cast,” Tennant says, carefully.

(Dominic) Treadwell-Collins - executive producer - is more forthright.

“We had a very strict ‘no arseholes’ policy,” he says.

-----

Your mother was a Jilly Cooper fan? And, therefore, presumably … a Rupert Campbell-Black fan?

“My mum, you know … blushed when I told her [I’d got the role],” (Alex) Hassell admits. “A lot of women blushed when I told them.”

I’m interviewing Hassell, 44, and Tennant, 53, together. As a former Doctor, Tennant has, of course, a lot of experience in playing a role women find attractive.

“Once you’ve made [Rupert Campbell-Black] flesh, I think a lot of people are going to find it difficult to interact with you, Alex,” he says, helpfully.

It seems Hassell is aware of this.

“Yes,” he says. “One friend, when I told her, said, ‘Oh, that’s a bean-flicker role!’ I said, ‘Ah, I see.’ ”

“Huh. I don’t think I’ve ever had anyone come up to me and say, ‘I’ve masturbated thinking about you,’ ” Tennant says, thoughtfully.

“David!” Hassell exclaims, hurt. “When we met, that’s the first thing I said.”

-----

“Tony’s from a lower class, while Rupert was born with an entire silver cutlery canteen in his mouth,” Tennant says. “So whatever Tony does, he never has that class advantage. Tony needs to taste the blood of his betters in his mouth to make him feel better. Rupert’s blood.”

“And while Rupert is, in many ways, a shit,” Hassell says, thoughtfully, “he’s not a bad man, like Tony. Tony is jealous of Rupert. He wants his house, his women, his life.”

Accordingly, this suit-based class war plays out as Campbell-Black tries to take over Baddingham’s TV station — and the backstabbing, shenanigans, shagging and skulduggery commence.

-----

The tennis court at Cooper’s house is the setting for one of her most iconic scenes — where Campbell-Black first meets his love interest, Taggie, while he’s playing naked tennis. He is adjudged to have lost a match point because something is over the line. Oh, why am I being so coy? This is Jilly Cooper. It’s his penis. His massive penis is judged to be over the line. A note to diehard fans: this scene is shot exactly as written. You will see a lot of willies.

“We’ve been equal opportunities in our nudity,” Treadwell-Collins says. “There’s a willy for every pair of tits.”

“That was my great disappointment over the TV show,” Cooper sighs. “The tennis court is a terrible mess — no one’s played on it for 20 years — and I thought [Disney] might be darlings and build me a new one.”

She looks around, hopefully.

“Do you think anyone here has some booze?” she asks. “It is the afternoon.”

Cooper has been an invaluable muse to everyone on set while filming. In one scene, she handed over an urgent note that read, “Rupert would never say ‘spouse’ — that’s very lower-middle [class]. He would say ‘wife’.”

She argued for particularly Cooperesque jokes and puns to stay in, and was firm that the whole “First of May” tradition remain.

“Oh, yes,” she says, looking delighted, and then quotes herself. “ ‘First of May, first of May — outdoor f***ing starts today. But if as usual it do rain, we f*** off indoors again.’ ”

This ribald rhyme kicks off a massive shagging montage, involving the entire cast. And all outdoors, of course.

-----

I can’t tell you what fun it is interviewing all the Rivals people. Because of the show, everyone talks about their memories of the Eighties (David Tennant: “No, my Eighties weren’t like a Jilly Cooper book — I was at school in Paisley with my glasses held together with sticky tape, and a very unappealing haircut”), and smoking (Hassell: “Everyone smoked everywhere, didn’t they? Even on planes. They’d draw across that little … health curtain, and everyone smoked behind it”), and how hard it was to leave Cooper’s world when shooting finished (Hassell: “No one was looking at me like I’m the most sexy man on the planet any more. It was tough.”)

-----

In the event, (Aidan) Turner, 41, is an absolute hoot — particularly on the subject of the massive moustache he sports on the show. It is a magnificent specimen of upper-lip pelt. It looks like a vole fell asleep under his nose.

It looks like the one Ned Flanders has on The Simpsons, I tell him.

Turner gives a huge, barking laugh.

“Ned Flanders? I mean, I was thinking more … Irish stag? Super-masculine?”

He starts giggling again.

Turner’s relaxed stance towards his sex god-dom comes with an interestingly meta twist. In Rivals, one of Baddingham’s TV shows is called Four Men Went to Mow — where sexy farmers, sexily stripped to the waist, carry out sexy agricultural duties.

Turner, of course, infamously stripped to the waist a few times in Poldark, for that scything scene or lying in bed or emerging from the sea. In a pleasingly postmodern moment, one scene sees Turner rail against Four Men Went to Mow — raging, almost camply, “TV can’t just be men taking their tops off!”

Rivals is on Disney+ from October 18

[handweavers]

Have you seen the hugh grant adaptation of maurice and if so what are your thoughts on it?

i have and i really enjoy it! i think the cinematography is beautiful and i appreciate most of the little changes they made to the story, particularly that of making it more clear that clive's "crisis" was due to internalized (and externalized) homophobia and not that he just woke up one day and decided he's straight now like the book implies lol. i think the movie is excellent at capturing the almost dreamlike, nostalgic quality of the book. it is generally very faithful to the book, down to repeating many lines word for word, which i really appreciate

i have mixed feelings on the casting of james wilby because in the book maurice is hyper masculine, tall dark and handsome, explicitly stated to be em forster's "middle class dream man" in that he is the english middle class ideal of a very masculine straight man, the last man anyone would ever suspect of being gay, and that clive was the one who was a bit more effeminate and boyish. i think a part of that was also a class thing (the whole book is class analysis), in the sense that maurice being middle class and occupying a more precarious position than clive meant he couldn't afford to be as 'soft' as clive was and put a lot more effort into performing heterosexuality publically while being far more comfortable with his homosexuality in private than clive ever was. but also due to class clive was more unwilling to risk his social status by fully embracing life as a gay man whereas maurice actually developed class consciousness over the course of the book and abandons his class position altogether lol. james wilby brings a different vibe to the character, and i feel that dichotomy between maurice and clive is switched around a bit and the social context of their characters as they were written for their time period (the early 1910s) is somewhat discarded, which makes me a little sad. but wilby does so well in the role, as does grant and rupert graves as alec i'm not as grumbly about it as i might be.

[titus-androgynous-87]

Any RPDR fans on here that aren’t also on Reddit missed out on one of the funniest and most wholesome things to happen to the Drag Race subreddit.

A man, I forget his actual name and internet handle (which is just as well because he doesn’t need anyone putting that info out there), had mistaken the RPDR sub for one about actual drag racing.

He liked to play drag racing video games, and he’d posted a question about which make/model car would be a good place to start for some game he was looking to play. It was clear that English wasn’t his first language and wasn’t super familiar with how the internet worked, let alone Reddit. And so, naturally, Reddit did what Reddit does best: had a fun and thankfully good-natured roasting.

People were offering up names of queens like: Nymphia Wind, Sapphira, Latrice Royale, and more I can’t remember right now. And this guy was so sweet replying “never heard of it, but thank you friend!” and then like. Then a few minutes later he’d reply again “this is a singer?”

Cut to a few hours later, he makes another post apologizing for posting in the wrong sub, explaining his confusion, and asking that we “please didnt charge [him] with a cyber crime.” So we all made an effort to make it clear we weren’t angry, but hoping that he would pick up on the joke and join in. And we all helped explain the show, how it worked, what it meant to the community, etc.

This man makes yet another post, with a hastily made Windows Movie Maker slideshow attached thanking the sub for being so kind and saying how he had never heard of Rupert’s Drag Race for LGBT, but he liked seeing all the representation of not only different races, nationalities, and ethnicities, but also gender, sexuality, and aesthetics.

He then went on to explain in accompanying text that he had never had any ill will towards queer people, he hadn’t ever really understood before, and had never heard of drag at all. But he was glad he made a happy mistake, because it helped him learn a little more about something he didn’t understand and discover a culture he’d never known existed, but was glad it did.

And then his last post in the saga was under a different handle, and explained that he’d been using his son’s account before, but now he had his own. And while he didn’t think he’d stick around the RPDR sub long-term, he said he might check in every once in a while to see “the new singers.”

The sub has a new flair in his honor: I’m Rupert. I think we made him an honorary mod, or someone proposed it at least. It was all very funny, and I’m very glad that everyone kept the joke contained, and that OP took it well. And wherever he is, I hope he’s having fun, and finds cash in his coat pocket.

[ceruleanwhore]

So I’ve seen a lot of posts talking about the potential for canon Ted x Trent in the finale, but there’s an angle or two I haven’t seen examined yet that I’d like to discuss here. What I am referring to is mainly why the writers chose to have Trent be the one to support Colin through his arc, coming out and everything, instead of using Keeley, who is canonically bi and was in a sapphic relationship during Colin’s arc. They didn’t need to have another character come out and everything for the sake of supporting Colin through his arc, and yet they chose to do so anyway, and I do think it’s important that they chose Trent specifically. I think it’s also important to acknowledge how limited lgbtq rep has been in media and how already, just by having Keeley and Colin be written as they are, this show has gone far beyond most others. Likewise, it should be acknowledged how having that role in Colin’s arc would have been genuinely very good for Keeley’s own character arc and how well it could have tied into some aspects of her relationship with Jack, so it’s not as though using her for that would’ve just been a cheap cop-out. The fact that they didn’t do that indicates to me that they have something specific and even better in mind.

When you keep that in mind, suddenly the signs are everywhere that this could actually, genuinely happen in canon - Trent’s red string bracelet, Ted’s comment about Sleepless in Seattle, Trent meeting Ted’s mom, etc. My whole thing with this pairing is that, when I look at it, especially in s3, there’s so much there that I genuinely believe they’d already be snogging if it was hetero and in a different show. In this context, I can only see Trent coming out and Ted “I was a straight man” Lasso making that movie reference as our indication that they bat for the other team, as it were, and yes, this can be something other than friendship.

The other thing I would add is that in the mom episode we get open acknowledgment that Ted’s biggest problem is how he runs around helping others but can’t accept help from anyone else for himself. I would then point out that the only time he’s received the same huge, self-sacrificial type of help he gave Beard with prison and everything is what he got from Trent Crimm revealing an anonymous source and then leaving his entire career to show his support and respect of Ted. Yes, a lot of the others around him have supported and helped Ted in different ways but I think it’s huge that Trent is the only one who’s done so on that level. I would also add that Trent has supported Ted multiple times while being one of the only characters to do so without ever acting against him. Beard stole his car, Nate turned on him, Rebecca was plotting against him and using Leslie to do so, etc., and yet Trent from the beginning was skeptical at most and never really acted against Ted. Beyond that, I also think that the first article Trent wrote about Ted in s1 is hugely indicative of Trent’s potential compatibility with Ted.

For one thing, Ted talked quite a bit in s1 about curiosity and went on that whole speech with Rupert in the darts game about how he values it but how so few people are genuinely curious - but Trent is. Trent shows up to write about Ted, skeptical but curious enough to pay close attention and allow his view of this other man to shift and to not be clouded by biases. I think the truth element is also huge - Ted’s ex wifey couldn’t accept his communication style and got an override from their therapist to force Ted to be outwardly truthful in a way he wasn’t comfortable with, and yet Trent clearly demonstrates his ability to accurately discern the truth from Ted without ever pushing him in such a way. Trent over and over again respects boundaries, never pushes people to share beyond what they’re comfortable with, and still gleans the truth from what he does see and hear, which is exactly what Ted needs.

Lastly, I’m not here to go off ragging on tedbecca and tbh I wouldn’t be mad if it did happen, but I want to talk about why I just don’t see it happening in canon real quick. First and foremost is that she’s the only other character than Ted’s ex (is her name Michelle? I genuinely can’t remember and that’s the only reason why I’m not using it) who uses ‘Oklahoma’ with him, and I don’t actually see that as a good thing. This is especially the case ever since it came out that Michelle(?) is now dating the therapist she and Ted saw who had them start using that in the first place, since that new relationship calls all the therapy she and Ted did into question.

Also, it’s not just that Rebecca used to be plotting against Ted, it’s that from s1 e1 on she’s been using him in one way or another to get back at or one up Rupert. Whether it’s working against him in s1 or then really trying to get him to win, especially with that one game against West Ham in s3, she’s just continually trying to use Ted as a tool against another man. What’s more damning is that when she does start to show interest in men who are not Rupert, it’s never Ted- Ted’s just there to bring her biscuits and engage in occasional attempts at girl talk, which really fits into the trope of a token gay best friend. I think they do have a good, solid relationship and, like I said, I won’t be mad if they do end up together, but I don’t see them as being set up to be in a romantic relationship.

But yeah, I think that’s all for now lol

[bonzos-number-1-fan]

TMAGP 24 Thoughts: Teething Problems

Back to back guest writers. This time it's Alex C. Telander from both Ostium, and Circé. Which are, again, shows I have not yet listened to and so can't comment upon. A Norris episode too, sort of, been a very long time since we've had one of those. A really good episode though, if one thin on the ground for the sort of content I write about.

Spoilers for episode 24 below the cut.

Gwen and Lena's interaction wasn't exactly how I was imagining Gwen getting back in the good books going. I do wonder if this is going to be a marked shift in Gwen's characterisation going forward or if it's more of a one-off thing. Another mention of the minister does make me hope we'll meet them soon. I've seen a lot of people expecting this to be Elias but I'd rather it be a new character. Well, that Elias would be new but you understand my point. If it's anyone we've previously "met" I'm expecting it to be Peter Lukas more than Elias.

For the incident proper this is another that doesn't have an awful lot to dig into. I did really enjoy it but when its so explicit and straight forward I don't think there is a lot of value in me just stating what happened in it. The only interesting element of the incident to discuss would've been whether any of this was in her head but the heading does give that away. Other than that it's just the mention of Celia. That's only really interesting for two reasons. Firstly that no one mentioned it after the fact which you'd expect to happen but we also don't get an indication of who listened to this one. Secondly is that Rupert really seemed to like her. With a lot of this incident seemingly being a delusion I'm not actually sure there is much to talk about there either. There really might not be a whole lot wrong with Rupert here and so there isn't any reason to think that this is some sort of sign of anything. So, yeah, not much to say on that one but it was a well written and well performed episode. I really enjoyed it.

The post-incident stuff doesn't have a load to dig into either. The interaction with Sam, Celia, and Alice feels pretty explicit without a lot of subtext or ground for theory crafting. Celia continues to manipulate the whole staff, and Sam and Alice continue to butt heads about the sort of stuff that likely made them break up. Very little to say on Basira showing up either. I'm not really sure why she was in this episode. This one just felt like fan service to me in its current context. Which isn't bad exactly but it's not something that personally excites me.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Incident/CAT#R#DPHW Master Sheet and Terminology Sheet

DPHW Theory: 1375 seems about right here.

CAT# Theory: Yeah, 1s are 1s. I'll do something with this once I'm not dying so much.

R# Theory: BC seems about inline with this. It seems a lot more in her head than it is in reality but there is also video evidence of it.

Header talk: Baby (demonic) -/- Delusion (Exhaustion) having this in "Delusion" is interesting in that it's fairly explicitly a statement that not everything she's experiencing is the truth. Given the reactions others in this episode it does sort of seem like very very little of it was.

[yarboyandy]

Please post the streamer Jenny headcanon <3 <3 <3

Ok it’s long sorry LOL. Keep in mind I don’t actually watch a lot of streamers and I wrote this probably while I was half a sleep.

Jenny would be a Twitch streamer thats kinda famous but is always involved in this crazy never ending drama that she won’t NOT interact with. Giles knows some of it but doesn’t undestand a lick of it because he can barely use the internet anyways and because like shes just saying shit like “uhg XxDARKREAPERxX raided us last night and tried to stream snipe me while I was doing a skyrim themed summoning subathon.” And giles is like “thats nice dear.” Its not until he walks in during one of her streams to give her dinner while still in his work clothes and is like “is this your internet friends? ☺️ hello everyone! Oh i cant see anyone. Tough crowd! Oh well, love you.” And kisses her. It’s literally over for her for the next 48 hour twitter news cycle as people find out like soft core manic pixie dream e-girl PA3G0N-VV1TCHH is dating a BRITISH GUY (we thought she was a feminist!) who is like ten years older than her and doesn’t know shes a twitch streamer. Its even worse when she makes an apology video and reveals his name is RUPERT and it makes everything way worse. Its only until they get him to play among us and he wins that someone takes a picture of him in Jennys cat ear headphones and posts in on twitter with the caption “can i say something?” Does he finally win the hearts of viewers. He makes periodic appearances to say shit like “oh yeah this is like at the academy when—“ and proceeds to say the most batshit traumatizing events ever. Her collab with GFUEL includes an earl grey tea pre-work out that he tries on stream and has to pretend to like before explaining off camera that that he read the label and that he isn’t supposed to have that much caffine because of the constant concussions he gets and then immediately passes out for like 15 hours. Jenny does a charity stream while he’s passed out (You can see him in the background on the guest room bed) and taking bets on when he’ll wake up. Buffy does a superchat or whatever to ask “is he alive? I need him. Big bad.” And Jenny ends the stream right away much to the confusion of everyone.

[delumineight]

romione in terms of “spice”

this is going to be a lot less nsfw than you think it is

unfortunately anyone who has tiktok knows that there’s this thing called “booktok” which had led to horrible things in literature like trope marketing, glorification of domestic violence and abuse, and other things. one thing to note is that a lot of these (mostly) women on booktok are looking for one thing in particular when they read a book; romance. or at least that’s what they call it. i feel as if anyone who has romantic experience finds it anything but that, but either way. when it comes down to it they think good romance = good smut. and good smut actually means bdsm.

tldr: people don’t like romione, or romione smut because ron isn’t dominant.

i was unfortunate enough to come across a tiktok—posted by a dramione, of course—where it’s a filter and it does the characters and it gives a trope, an ending, “spice levels” and other meaningless things meant to interest people. the results of said person’s filter are below.

the characters were obviously ron and hermione but it uses rupert and emma’s faces and i don’t like to consider them at all, especially when talking about something nsfw so just pretend it’s there!

anyways yeah sure whatever. i open the comments. the first one is below.

which this is just a bit confusing even when it comes to surface level canon… didn’t he spend a great part of the sixth book sucking face with a girl he didn’t even like? consider how much more has to be happening between him and someone he’s actually in love with.

the second concern is the line “we all know ron[‘s] personality.”

ron’s personality is not dominant. romione’s and dramione’s alike actually agree on that one thing, for the most part! but why exactly should ron’s personality and ron’s personality only define how “spicy” they can get in the bedroom?

like i said in the first paragraph, they see “spice” or good sex as bdsm. and as we’ve established most romiones don’t see or write ron as a traditional “dom” in anyway. if anything, more of us think hermione is the dom and there’s dramiones/romione antis who have agreed with this… but still don’t think they’re “spicy.”

if there’s still an s/m aspect to it… why is it not “spicy” anymore? it’s quite obvious to anyone (or at least i think so). they don’t find it hot because the man’s not in charge. because the woman isn’t be controlled, but instead doing the controlling.

and i know there are plenty of fics of dramione or any ship but romione out there of a mistress/sub man but in most m/f relationships the dom man/sub woman is a lot more popular, no matter the characters personality. i’ve seen it happen with romione where the writer would rather have a woman be out of character to be dominated than have hermione dominate, or even just tone down ron’s dominance to make it in character again.

i myself do admit that i have written some things where hermione’s a bit submissive but i try to never make ron dominant because he just isn’t.

[justdecadentcollectiondestiny]

Asteroid City Details

"We saw a coyote get run over by a fourteen-wheeler and left him flat as a pancake."

So the roadrunner is left wandering aimlessly, with nothing to get chased by.

Augie lets out a half laugh/half cry when he says his children aren't orphans now "because I'm still alive." Undoubtedly a bit of Jones Hall's real grief seeping through.

Jones Hall explains to Conrad Earp that the reason he thinks Augie burns his hand on the quickie-griddle is because he was looking for an excuse for why his heart was beating so fast.

And he says this right after he broke Conrad's window, an equally impulsive and dangerous act.

That sounds like flirting to me.

Woodrow checks his watch to time how long it takes Clifford to jump off the roof after he asks if anyone dares him to do it.

The voice Midge Campbell uses when she's playing this character, a trans-atlantic accent

is her actress Mercedes Ford's natural voice.

"When Midge makes her exit in Act III, Scene Five, try having her say the line after she closes the door."

The scene this line refers to is most likely the emergency meeting, during which Jones walks offstage and that we don't get to see all of. So we don't get to see whether Schubert took his soon-to-be-ex-wife's note to heart.

Montana's actor, Asquith Eden's natural voice is a British accent, just like the real-life actor who plays him, Rupert Friend.

"One day I'll probably be discovered lifeless in an overflowing bathtub with an empty bottle of sleeping pills spilled all over the floor."

I'm sure I'm not the only person whose heart dropped when Augie looked over to Midge's window to this sight.

"You really did it. That actually happened."

When Augie burns his hand on the quickie-griddle, Midge reacts with extremely visible surprise, which is a bit out of character for her. She/Mercedes also glances to either side, off screen, as if checking with an offstage crew member or stage manager that the scene should continue. This may insinuate that Jones Hall really did actually burn his hand, and Mercedes' reaction was genuine.

The symbols used to inventory the asteroid are the same symbols on the wall of the hotel lobby.

While the girls are burying Augie's wife's ashes, his hand brushes against both Woodrow's and Stanley's. Woodrow takes his hand. Stanley does not.

[zerokissingbooth]

rant under cut ab dr ratio

i know we don't know much about his actual personal life just yet, but it feels less like earning nous' gaze is earned by intelligence but rather drive to your field. your passion willing to push the boundaries of what's known- ruan mei as an example.

until ratio does something worthwhile like idk, preventing the mass extinction of sentient inorganic life in hopes of stopping an egopowered supercomputer (screwllum vs emperor rupert i) or continued to actively reject the genius society despite MULTIPLE INVITATIONS (ruan mei) or having mass intellect, developing the simulated universe from an OUTSIDE LOCATION and being acknowledged as insanely smart but refusing to actually use it (stephen lloyd) he won't ever be acknowledged by nous.

it isn't a matter of humanity, empathy, or anything like that- hell there's still genius members we haven't met because they're all various levels of too invested in their work, introverted/anti-social, or something else that has nothing to do with morality.

dr ratio's prime drive outside of spreading knowledge is spreading himself outwards. he has ego, he actually put an entire space station in danger just to try and prove a point. like why hasn't anyone talked about that? dr ratio putting the station in crisis just to stick his nose up at a small group of people-- two of them not actually caring at all, by the way. the entire conflict of the space station issue with dr ratio's introduction was entirely focused on ratio and screwllum.

and you cannot say ratio has empathy-- he makes his students cry without care, his class has an insanely low graduation rate, he's quick to insult first due to his own admitted bias before actually listening to someone (see: ratio actively insulting aventurine's race and lack of intelligence first). he refuses to debate people because he automatically declares himself a winner. his entire philosophy of 'spreading knowledge and curing ignorance' is counteracting his own actions with how harsh and refusing he is to accommodate to students. even if students that do graduate out of the 3% become experts... that is an insanely low number for a guy who taught 52 courses.

and we know why some of the geniuses are the way they are or why they seem less empathetic. like ruan mei's trauma with the death of her parents and the failure to keep family promises (seen in chara stories 1 and 2) caused her to spiral hardcore into trying to bring them back and nearly broke the biology of the abundance on her planet. she didn't eat until needed, didn't sleep, she was literally in a daze working.

or screwllum! while we don't know much we know that not only does he hate any mechanical constructs that follow rupert i's orders (which are to destroy organic life) he is utterly fascinated and enchanted by life. his own invitation by nous to join the society actively prevented the IPC from wiping out all mechanical lifeforms, further prevented due to his own intervention.

ratio is insanely fascinating, but he is not as empathetic as it seems. he's rational, logical and a jackass; knowledge and being able to carry a title is first to him, with how narrow of a birth he has within education. many degrees he has, but they're ranging from philosophy, mathematics, biology, and whatever- nothing within the realm of history, the arts, languages or literature. an argument could be made here that ratio specifically values mathematics and sciences above other aspects of knowledge, leaning into his bias, but that's just me.

"but his note to aventurine!" was a note explaining how he had an answer to aventurine's previous question. acheron had more of an impact on aventurine's almost-death in the dreamscape which makes sense, seeing as her entire thing is with nihility and death. it doesn't surprise me he figured it out, as he is a philosopher.

"what is death in a dream?" is a great philosophy question and would've been a treat for him to pick at and solve.

[blackberry-nightingale]

im new to your block, could you introduce your OCs?

Of course!! Sorry for the wait this took me a long time to type up.

Firstly, welcome! Glad to have you here!

Secondly, this is gonna be a long post so I'm going to keep it under a read more.

Thank you so much for asking! I hope you enjoy! And feel free to ask about anyone

Demon characters across all stories -

Dayzel: he/him, trans/pan, ice/shadow demon hybrid. Dayzel is a bit of a han solo type rogue. He is very charismatic and flirty, with *severe* trauma. He's got mommy issues like crazy, and has had a long string of toxic exs. Was married to Nox for a while. He also worked as a hitman for hire with Rupert when they were dating. And then worked for Berkley for a while kidnapping victims for her. Later is a stay at home Dad while Mibium (his eventually husband) works full time.

Beth: She/her, cis/lesbian, ice/shadow demon hybrid. She is Dayzel's estranged younger sister. She's very prim and proper, until you get to know her and she loosens up. Then she becomes much more mischievous and playful. She's a bit reckless and incredibly stubborn, but ultimately is a good person, despite her past mistakes.

Cole: he/him, too young to know labels, electric demon. Beth's son who is adopted by/raised by Dayzel and Mibium.

Cindy: she/her, cis/bi, true shadow demon. Dayzel and Beth's mother. A truly ferocious woman who wanted "the best" for her kids. Toxic to everyone but Lucian. Was killed by Dayzel when he was 17.

Lucian: he/him, trans/straight, ice demon. Dayzel and Beth's father. Very laid back to the point of neglect.

Rupert: he/him, cis/gay, fire demon. He is also pretty charismatic but in a different direction. Think wolf in sheep's clothing. He's not as smart as some of my other OCS and much prefers brawn over brain. But definitely not a himbo. Runs a criminal gang of assassins and hitmen for hire. Mostly other demons.

Octavian: he/him, cis/bi (masc preference), poison/shadow demon hybrid. A demon aristocrat. A bit of slimeball but everyone loves him or at least pretends to because they're afraid of him. A collector of "fine" things.

Marley: they/poi, nonbinary/panromantic/asexual, poison demon. A chemist specializing in poisons/their own venom. They are very passionate and care deeply, but are a bit of a social outcast. Deeply, deeply craves connection.

Rain: he/him, trans/bi, touch/shadow demon hybrid. Very work focused and detail oriented due to his relationship with Berkley. Very low self esteem. Very little memory aside from living with Berkley. Incredibly lonely... This man needs a hug and a raise.

Reigns: he/him, trans/gay, true shadow demon. He is a "scientist" who works in Richard's lab. He's mostly muscle and sometimes an experiment himself though. He's very kind hearted, but is put in a place where he can't always abide by this. Ian's actual father figure and mentor for many years.

Jane: she/her, cis/bi, touch/shadow demon hybrid. She is a very gentle soul who has seen way too much. She's very laid back and relaxed most of the time, but does get anxious quite easily, especially when it comes to her family. She has no memory of her early childhood and was bounced from home to home the majority of her life. Married to Phoenix, and mother of Dee.

Phoenix: she/her, cis/bi, succubus. She is very... Passionate in a lot of ways. She tends to have a lot more of a temper than her wife, which can get her into trouble sometimes. She works as a secretary. She also streams games in her spare time.

Dee: they/them nonbinary/pan, touch/succubus/shadow demon hybrid. They are still a teenager, but they have a good head about them. Having picked up Phoenix's assertive nature, and Jane's levelheadedness.They can be very reckless at times and don't like listening to authority. They can be very stubborn, but what teenager isn't. Incredibly empathetic.

Dare: they/she/he, genderfluid/bi (feminine preference), true shadow demon. They are Jane and Ian's parent. They are a very gentle and empathetic soul that was thrust in a very bad relationship. The king of hell, alongside Richard. Just wants to be a dad in peace... Living out the cottagecore dream with their partner Mindy.

Richard: he/him, cis/gay, mind demon. The king of hell! He's very charismatic in the sense that he is powerful... But has the personality of a wet paper bag. He is very self centered and selfish to a certain level of cruelty. He's Ian's real dad... But definitely not a good one.

Ian: he/him, cis/bi (feminine preference), mind/shadow demon hybrid. He's got so many daddy issues it's not even funny. He's very quick to temper and struggles to express genuine emotions. He gets overwhelmed easily. He can be gentle with those he cares about though, such as Talon and Ryan. He is pretty suave and very good at manipulating people. He's the secret prince of Hell.

Talon: he/him demiboy/unlabeled, mind/shadow demon. A young clone of Ian that is being raised as Ian's son. He's very curious about the world around him and loves asking questions. Very friendly most of the time, but can be shy if he's already overwhelmed.

Ryan: he/him, trans/gay, true shadow demon. He is sweetie with a, albeit mischievous, heart of gold. He loves to cook for his friends and family. He's very introverted and enjoys the simpler things in life. Takes on being an adopted father to Talon with Ian.

Ash: he/him, cis/gay, touch/??? hybrid. He used to be Ian's best friend. They grew up in the lab together. They had a falling out though. He is very affectionate, sometimes to an uncomfortable degree.

Past: he/they, demiboy/demiromantic/pansexual, fate demon. He is the storyteller of the fate siblings. He is the most sociable and approachable of the siblings. Also, the least outwardly cruel.

Present: they/he/she, genderfluid/bi (masc preference), fate demon. The ambassador of the fate siblings. They are very work oriented and don't really take time for self care. They are easily the most cruel, but have a "work" persona most people like. Old friends with Nox, and they have a *massive* crush on him.

Future: xey/xem, agender/aromantic/asexual, fate demon. The prophet of the fate siblings. The most anti-social of the fates. The oldest and "leader" of the triplets. Xey consider Dare to be xer only true friend.

Isaac: he/him, cis/gay, true shadow demon. A bit of a sleezy guy. He is still powerful, and have influence, but is not well liked. He doesn't mind too much though. He has Luc to torment.

Luc: he/him, cis/pan, fire demon. Ironically has very bad luck. Is very hotheaded and snarky. He tries to be there for others as best he can, but has a lot of his own issues to deal with. Ends up lonely a lot of the time, aside from Isaac.

Zeke: he/him, cis/bi (feminine preference), electric/shadow demon hybrid. A bounty hunter in space in the far, far future when Humanity/angel/demons have taken to the stars. He is another roguish type. Very introverted and spends a lot of time alone. Though he warms up for those he cares about.

Angel characters across all stories -

Berkley: she/he/it, demigirl/demiromantic/demisexual, reaper angel. She is a bit of a mad scientist type. She is also a bit of a social recluse aside from a select few. She is very smart, but very socially inept. Collects teddy bears. She has a very large garden and does a lot of different crafts.

Mindy: she/he, genderfluid/bi (feminine preference), reaper angel. She is like... A feral raccoon. She does not have a lot of social skills due to her past. But her partner, Dare, very much doesn't mind. They can be very sweet at times to those they care about. A bit of himbo.

Mibium: he/him, cis/gay, guardian/healer angel hybrid. He is very much himbo, and a gentle giant. Unless you piss him off, then you're fucked. He deepy, deeply loves and cares about people. He works as a high-school French teacher. His students are convinced he's not human, but don't know what he is. He's a very popular teacher. He's very sociable, if a bit awkward.

Nox: he/him, cis/gay, touch demon/cupid angel hybrid. He is incredibly vain and self-centered. Used to be married to Dayzel, and best friends with Rupert. He is a coward and does not handle being under pressure well.

Omen: he/him, cis/gay, reaper/light angel hybrid. A space bounty hunter in the far, far future. Rivals with Zeke. He has a *massive* crush on him though. Another gentle giant type.

TTRPG characters -

Nom: he/him, trans/pan, Gnome paladin/barbarian. He's my PC that I play in @icyheart-and-friends's DND campaign. He's got a heart of gold but has a lot of trust and self esteem issues. He's a writer under a pen name. Kinda-sorta dating a god? Incredibly loyal and empathetic.

Jax: he/him, trans/bi (masc preference), Tiefling Paladin. He's my PC that I play in @emmettland's DND campaign. He is a soldier that has befriended the king he serves under. Very friendly and the life of the party. Bit of a flirt. Very firm in his moral code. Sees his fellow soldiers as family that he cares deeply about.

Sebastian: he/him, cis/bi, Human. He is very determined, but a bit of a scaredy cat. He woke up in a castle with no memories, and has to keep fighting monsters to get them back. (Castle of memories TTRPG). He's an artist and very kind hearted.

[whitegoldtower]

Redoing this. My meow meow. My baby. My precious. My favourite skyrim OC; Severin Nervayne - an explanation. (Below the Break. If anyone actually reads this, I commend you, and also thank you for putting up with my shit)

You can also use this layout for your own OC posts, if you like!

Appearance

How does he look?

Severin’s a middle-aged dunmer (would be in his 50s in human years), with deep dusky grey skin; curly, black salt and pepper hair (Texture 3A/3B); a well-groomed beard, and reddish-grey eyes. He’s quite short (5’4”), and there’s evidence in his build of someone who used to be extremely physically fit. He has stretch marks on his lower abdomen from where he carried his daughter, Llevana, and almost the entirety of the left side of his body is covered with scarring from third degree burns. He is naturally flat chested, with a prominent adams apple, and the tattoos on his body (that weren’t destroyed by his burns) are an amalgamation of hand-poked pieces, including traditional Dunmeri motifs making up sleeves, and a crudely done ‘treasure map’ on his right hand.

What does he sound like?

His voice suffered some damage from the ash, and he’s a smoker, so his voice is pretty deep, raspy and heavy on the vocal fry (which is common of British accents anyway). If we’re giving him a regional British accent, considering how most of the Dunmer sound, he sounds like he’s from the North of England, most likely Yorkshire (think Sean Bean, just a little deeper). He speaks well and smoothly, though tends to compress his words (again, regional dialect). He has a great ‘bedtime story’ voice, and tends to speak at a gentle, soft volume. He is incapable of shouting/screaming.

What does he smell like?

At arm’s length, he smells warm and comforting, like old tomes and canis root tea. He tends to wear resinous oils, which would smell like a mixture of labdanum, frankincense and ylang ylang, with hints of tobacco and warm vanilla. In close proximity, the smell of sweet and smoky herbs linger on his fingers and on his lips, and the scent of his skin is electric, like the earth just before lightning strikes.

How does he feel?

Fully clothed, you’d embrace him to feel some well-loved robes, and the firmness of muscle with just a bit of squish. He’s warm. Very warm. Nude, the heat of his skin hits you before you even touch him. His body is a map of scars, each with a different story, though quite a few mysterious ones too. His body hair is quite soft, albeit quite thick, and he takes pride in his appearance. His blood runs hot, his lips are soft, and his hands are rough yet gentle.

His general demeanour?

The impression he gives off is one of a caring father. Perhaps the first noticeable personality trait is his gentleness, paired with a stern yet kind educational streak. He’s the teaching sort… although, he also just has that vibe when you look at him that you know he was a wild-child back in his day, and a demon in the sheets. And whilst those days may be past him, if you were to think of him in an intimate aspect, you’d be likely to imagine a sensual and romantic, smouldering slow-burn with buckets of stamina.

What does he usually do?

He’s the Professor of the History of Necromancy and the Undead at the College of Winterhold, and his course is important because he teaches his students very thoroughly about the dangers and risks involved in dealing with necromancy, undead and daedra - he, himself, being a walking example. He can often be found either in the Arcaneum, teaching in the Hall of the Elements, sparring with his daughter in the Midden or counselling students in his assigned office quarters. He has unintentionally become the ‘school therapist’ (or rather, the ‘dad’), because his students find him easy to talk to. (If you like Buffy, he’s a bit of a Rupert Giles)

Personality?

A very caring INTJ. A good listener, a logical mind, and tends to offer more practical advice than purely emotional support; he’s caring enough to try to help you solve your problems, instead of just patting you on the back and telling you that you’ll be ok. He can be quite socially anxious, but it’s not obvious at first glance; during lectures, he commands the room, speaks very well, cracks jokes and engages everyone (all in all, a beloved and popular teacher), however one look at his hands can tell you that he’s not as calm as he appears - it’s subtle, but they tremble. He’s docile and friendly, but genuinely frightening when pushed too far; he’s got an extremely long fuse, but when set off, he blows up VERY suddenly. 0 to 100 at lightning speed, speaking gently one minute then pinning someone against the wall by their throat the next. The only sure-fire way to piss him off is to threaten his daughter. He’s a very patient man, otherwise. But that’s not to say he won’t warn you first; if he rolls his shoulders, squares up, and asks you something politely along the lines of ‘would you like to clarify?’… back off. He’s also got a fun (if somewhat reckless) rebellious streak that doesn’t show itself often. The easiest way to get a glimpse of Severin’s naughty streak is to take notice of the antics his daughter, Llevana, gets up to.

Backstory

Part 1 (Somewhere Near Necrom, Morrowind)

Severin was introduced to pit fighting as a child in order to survive and earn his keep (he was paid in food and smokes), which he brought home to his sickly mother. At first, he was put up against skeevers. As he got bigger and smarter, so did his opponents. Eventually, the pit-fighting lead into grave-robbing and tomb-raiding, anything he could do to get his hands on gold, quickly, to look after himself and his mother. When his mother died suddenly, he found himself completely alone, and so began his obsessions with disease and death. He started fucking around with necromancy, trying to find a way to end disease and ultimately bring his mother back from the dead, wanting to bring her back so that she was completely impervious to sickness. He discovered he had a real knack for it when he found himself effortlessly raising ash spawn and fallen bandits, and over the span of his late teenage years, he was a fully fledged necromancer, and a pretty powerful one, too. His problems really started when he began experimenting; it came from a good place at first - experimenting with different strains of disease on the undead in order to attempt to create a vaccine-potion of sorts, but when he started mixing diseases, he got too far in over his head, ending up mutating his undead thralls into monstrous, violent, plagued abominations, barrelling his way down the rabbit hole of altering their very makeup, taking certain elements of the diseases to make his thralls faster, stronger, feel less pain and experience more bloodlust, and ‘live’ longer. In a way, he was making his own organic and genetically enhanced vampire. The end to his necromancy career came when he accidentally gave his creation sentience. The abomination he had created was in a staggering amount of both physical and mental agony, consistently screaming and begging for death. In a desperate bid to not destroy his research, Severin bargained with the Ideal Masters to take away the creature’s sentience again, but as soon as it was so, his creation simply devolved into complete violence and chaos, turned on him and almost murdered him, forcing him to kill it. Severin barely survived the encounter.

Part 2 (Vvardenfell, Morrowind)

After ditching necromancy and conjuration, Severin began down the path of learning restoration, alchemy and history, under the wing of the Telvanni mages who took him on after obscene amounts of begging. It was with the Telvanni that he met his late-wife, Llunela (They’re a T4T couple), with whom he often found himself after getting injured doing spellwork and alchemy. Eventually, Severin and Llunela moved in together and began building their lives on Vvardenfell, and soon enough, along came Llevana. When Llevana was two, however, the Red Mountain erupted. Hearing the rumble in the distance, Severin and Llunela fled their home, Severin with his daughter in his arms. As they were fleeing, Llunela fell, lost to the ash-flow pretty much instantly. With no time to react, Severin kept running, shielding Llevana from the ash and the heat with his body, holding up his magical ward for as long as he could, despite his skin beginning to blister and burn. He ran as far as he could, as fast as he could, and when he ran out of land, he started to swim, holding Llevana above the water. Sooner or later, though, he became exhausted and floated on his back, keeping her on his chest, so that if he died, she would not drown. He managed to stay awake, though, channelling his magic in alternation into keeping himself afloat and healing both himself and Llevana (whose arms had suffered some burning), and soon washed up on the coast, somewhere near Blacklight.

Part 3 (Somewhere Near Blacklight, Morrowind)

The first thing Severin did after washing up on the coast with his daughter was getting rid of their clothes, to prevent the fabric from sticking to their wounds. Still fuelled purely by adrenaline and the will to keep Llevana safe, Severin walked along the volcanic beach, naked, burnt and glassy-eyed, until he was found by a random civilian, who mistook him, at first, for an ash-spawn, until seeing the child he carried in his arms. They were taken in and tended to, healed and sheltered as much as possible, before they were well enough to move on.

Part 4 (Windhelm, Skyrim)

Severin moved into the Grey Quarter with Llevana as a refugee, where he took up pit-fighting again to provide for her, too unfamiliar with the region and afraid. For Llevana, he fought all sorts, from Orcs in their Strongholds to lowlifes in Riften’s Ratway, to corsairs on Smuggler Ships, only this time his skirmishes were made more interesting by his abilities with magic - this excited those who came to watch, resulting in him being paid more handsomely. Pit fighting in Skyrim had the same rules as pit fighting in Morrowind: none. Just survival. Bloody, brutal survival. Soon, however, he faced his most impressive fight - surrounded by blazing bonfires, scared out of his wits, he faced off against a giant. And despite his now traumatic fear of fire, he used the fire to his advantage, goading the Giant into chasing him around the pit, using his magic to augment the flames each time the Giant passed them, before finishing his opponent off by climbing onto the giant’s back and forcing its head into the fire. An altmer mage had been watching the fight, and recommended that Severin join the College of Winterhold, since his magic and intellect was ‘wasted’ in the pits.

Part 5 (Winterhold, Skyrim)

It would be many years (seventeen, to be precise), working with Nurelion in Windhelm, before Severin mustered up the courage to apply for a position at the College of Winterhold, afraid of not being good enough to teach and turned down, and also afraid of what the mages would think of him to look at him if he was accepted. Savos Aren, however, took a keen interest; whilst Severin didn’t quite have enough academic experience, he did have hell of a lot of field experience, and after a long interview, Severin was granted his position of Professor at the College.

Additional Info

What is he currently working on?

Alongside his teaching, Severin’s current research includes alchemical experimentation with blood compounds, so that he can help the more reasonable vampires who wish to be helped with their afflictions; he’s trying to create an artificial blood alternative.

What is Llevana like?

Llevana, now aged 19, looks a lot like her father, and she has her mother’s eyes and cheeky smile. She’s got her mum’s quick wit and academic prowess, and her father’s adventurous and experimental streak alongside his resilience. Her fascination is with the Dwemer, and she spends most of her time as Arniel Gane’s pupil, although the other portions of her time are spent either with Enthir, going dungeons crawling in Dwemer ruins, or trying to convince poor Severin that she’s perfectly safe. Her current pet project involves her dismantling dwarven centurions, spheres and spiders with intent to re-create a sort of dwemer pod-racer (which she intends to drag Enthir into in order to race around Blackreach faster, and to more efficiently avoid having to deal with the Falmer during her research).

Does Severin have PTSD?

Absolutely. No questioning it. He also has a permanent tremor in his hands and has absent PTSD triggered seizures (that look a lot like dissociation).

Will he find love again?

There is a certain closeted and repressed Thalmor mage who could learn a lot from him (and whom he could also learn a lot from)…

Did Necromancy have an effect on him?

Other than the trauma, yes. Dealing with the Ideal Masters corrupted quite a hefty chunk of his soul. Falion in Morthal might be able to help, if they research together.

What are his main proficiencies?

His very best skills are in Conjuration (Necromancy), Restoration (from his studies) and Alchemy (from his experiments), followed by One-Handed (from Pit-Fighting), Sneak (From Tomb-Raiding), Speech (From Teaching), Lockpicking (From Graverobbing) and Pickpocketing (Also from Graverobbing).

Does he have any special interests?

Vampires are a strong favourite of his; even though he’s not in his prime anymore, he’s definitely akin to a sort of Van-Helsing type figure. He may yet join the Dawnguard if his curiosity takes him there. With his daughter all grown up, a mer’s gotta have a hobby… but Isran would probably detest him, as Severin’s less excited about killing vampires and more excited about talking to and studying them to see if he can help them.

Have any of his other experiments gone wrong?

Many, but research is what it is. Trial and error. He’s accidentally paralysed himself a few times, contracted Sanguinare Vampiris by stupidly sampling a vampire heart, cured it, and blown up his alchemy table. He’s also been bitten by vampires SO many times.

Who are his friends?

He’s good friends with Tolfdir, Colette Marence and Urag Gro-Shub. Further back, he’s friendly with Nurelion and his old neighbours in the Grey Quarter, however there is one person he goes wayyyy back with: Teldryn Sero. He and Teldryn used to go Tomb-Raiding on the regular before the disaster. They met up in Solstheim when Severin was pit-fighting and raiding again to provide for Llevana and teamed up. Llevana calls him ‘Uncle Tel’.

As always, feel free to ask questions if there’s anything else you want to know about Severin ☺️

[xenonsreturn]

In Another Life

A short story of Garrus Vakarian and Commander Shepard

I need to do . . . something. I need to get out of here. If I stay in the battery any longer, I think I'm going to explode. Why does this room have to be so damn small?

But where the hell am I going to go? No matter where I go, I have to bring my head with me. What I really need is to get out of my head.

Where is this coming from? I've been doing fine . . . well, as fine as any turian on a suicide mission can do. But now, I can't seem to think straight. I'm nervous. Which is new for me. I can't concentrate on my calibrations and they seem to go on forever. I find myself pacing. There's a buzzing all over my skin. Maybe I'm sick. I could go see Dr Chakwas . . . no. Bad idea. She'd remove me from duty – or worse, give me medicine.

I'm heading for the mess. Maybe just having something in my stomachs will help me settle down.

When did this start, anyway? Hmm. Illium. No, it was after that. Hell, I don't know. I know I was fine when Shepard and I tracked down Sedonis. I still wonder whether I could have taken the shot. Is that what's bothering me?

No, that's not it. Even if I could have, I saw what Shepard was doing. She didn't want me to take it. Saving me from myself, she said. Hmm. She's done that a couple times now. She's always trying to pull me back. I don't know why she cares so much. It's really irritating.

Still, I have to admit, I make better choices when she's around. And when she's not – well, I turn into Archangel. It's a lot easier to be Archangel, but . . . well, I feel stronger, somehow, here on the Normandy. And it's good to have some familiar faces around sometimes. Joker. Tali. Even Liara for a bit there. Shepard, of course. I probably have more in common with her than anyone else on the ship. Hell, than anyone else in my life. I liked it when she used to come down and talk, before Liara came back. Somehow, she made the battery feel a little larger, even though there were two of us in that tiny space. But now, she and Liara are back together, and she hasn't been around since, and I -

Oh.

Oh, damnation.

How did I not see this happening? And now it's too late, isn't it?

I thought – I guess I thought . . . that she . . . maybe . . . ah, hell.

Can I go back to not knowing what's bothering me? That was better than this.

Great. Now I'm talking to myself. Or hearing voices in my head. Whatever. But I'm right. I can't go into hiding – not from myself. I turn around and get a seat at the end of an empty table.

I'm going back to the battery. I need . . . cover. I do not want company right now. No, Garrus, dammit, you're going to the mess!

I'm not alone long, however. Tali shows up. Great.

"Is this seat taken?" She asks – then, without waiting for a reply, she sits down anyway.

"Uhh . . ." I look the length of the empty table. "Doesn't look like it." None of the other seats are taken, either – why don't you try that one way over there?

She just looks at me. Well, at least I think that's what she's doing. That damn mask makes her hard to read. Actually, come to think of it, I wish I had a mask. Lucky lady.

"What are you having?" She asks.

I pretend to be relaxed. I am sure I suck at it. "I don't know. Whatever Rupert's serving that won't kill me, I guess."

Tali chuckles. "Well, whatever won't kill you, won't kill me, either. Let's split an order."

So much for no company. Back to the battery, I guess. "Actually, I'm not hungry after all," I say, and start to get up.

With surprising speed, Tali reaches across the table and grabs my wrist. Not only is she fast, she's strong. In spite of my shock, I have to admit, I'm impressed.

"Don't. Go. Anywhere. Garrus."

Well, this is . . . unwelcome. I slowly sit back down. I have a bad feeling about this.

"You've been acting . . . strange, Garrus. Distracted."

This is worse than I thought. People can tell.

"Ah, I don't think – "

Tali cuts me off. "Don't deny it. You haven't been yourself since we left Hagalaz."

"Well – "

"I've seen you pacing."

"No, I – "

"Your aim was off on the last mission."

Okay, that's too much. "Now, wait just one goddamn minute – "

She sighs. "Garrus, calm down. It's obvious you've got some knot you're trying to untie, and we feel – "

"WE?" This day just keeps getting worse and worse. "Who's we?"

"Oh, you know, Miranda, Jack, Samara, Chakwas, Gabby."

Just when I think I've hit bottom. At least Shepard's not on the list. And -

"Not Kelly?"

"No, not Kelly. I know it's her job, but . . . well, quite frankly, none of us can stand her."

I don't understand that at all, but I'm really beyond caring at this point.

"Look, Garrus, we just want to help."

Help. Fantastic. Not only can people tell, not only are they talking about it, now they want to help. I'm Archangel, goddamn it.

"Tali. Go hack some other project. Right. Now."

I stare into that mask. She seems to stare back for a moment, then shrugs and stands up. "Fine. I tried. Chakwas said you'd do this." She turns away, but then turns back and says, "Take care of it yourself, then, Garrus. Good luck with that. You need it."

I just look at her until she's gone. I wish I could take some satisfaction in hurting her feelings, but it's clear that she's not hurt. She's just pissed. And also, well, I don't want to hurt her, not really. She's a good person on the team. I like her. It's just . . . don't go trying to get under my skin like that! You're not invited!

"So – " A voice right next to me. I look up and Rupert is standing there.

"What do you want?" I growl. I am kind of pleased that he backs up a step.

"Uh, that's what I was going to ask you, Garrus," he says, a little breathlessly. He holds out the day's menu. "What do you want?"

I take it out of his hands. "Just . . . give me something that will kill me."

It has not been a good day.

Back in the battery. I am, in fact, hiding. I don't want to go out there. Where they know. I just wish, in here, I didn't know. I must have been blind. And now, I wish I still was.

I look around the little space. I don't have much of mine here. Because I don't have much that's mine. I never thought about it, never thought I was missing anything, but right now, I do. Damn, do I.

At my terminal, there's my dad's old insignia from the fleet. I wonder, did dad ever have to deal with this sort of thing? I can't imagine it. But then, we were always so different. He had discipline. I have . . . what? Lack thereof, I guess. I can't help but rush in . . . and maybe that's why I feel this way. If he could have felt something like this, Dad would have damped it down. But I can't. Not anymore.

The only other time . . . well, there she is. Her dog tags hang next to Dad's insignia. Scout Lidia Misuraca. I wish I didn't have these tags. Because that would mean she'd still be alive. She might have been halfway across the galaxy – hell, she might even be fighting us; we are with Cerberus, after all – but she'd be living. I've run it through my head a thousand times and I still don't know if there was anything different I could have done during that raid, something that might have saved her life – but I still wonder. And maybe that's why I'm out here now.

And maybe she's not all. I take off my visor and run my finger over the ten names carved in the frame. Yeah. I had a team. Good people. And now they're all dead. Because of me. Maybe that's another reason I'm in here – because everyone I touch, dies. It's safer. For them. For me.

I look at the message on the terminal screen. Took me nearly an hour to write it.

Commander,

When you have a moment, I have something I need to discuss with you.

- Garrus

Am I giving too much away? My finger hovers over the 'send' key. Do I dare? And then I realize, it's the only way through this. I hit the key.

I am surprised by the fact that I actually feel some small measure of relief. We're out of the holding pattern now, I guess. I took action – just a little, but enough to set . . . something . . . in motion. I don't know if it's the best thing, but at least it's something. And what the hell am I hoping for anyway? I know she's with Liara. There's nothing that will change that. Maybe if I'd said something earlier, before Illium . . . ah, but I didn't know then, did I? Dammit. And anyway, Liara makes Shepard happy. Who am I to stand in the way of that?

But don't you deserve some happiness, too, Garrus? It's odd, but I hear Shepard's voice asking this question. Do I? I don't know. Ask me most days, I'd say…no. I don't deserve it. But when we're together, maybe I feel like I do. Maybe because she's always seen the best in me. So maybe I do deserve some happiness – but just because I might deserve it, doesn't mean I get it. The galaxy is a cold, cold place. It doesn't care what we deserve. It doesn't care for justice. It's just dark. And I guess it's up to us to be the stars, to hold against the darkness. That's what I strive for. And in a different way, so does Shepard. Different, but . . . well, I guess I had an idea that maybe we were just same enough to have some overlap, maybe enough common ground to build . . . something more than this.

And now she could be on her way down here. Right now.

The reality of this hits me like a . . . well, like a missile to the face. Suddenly, I need to get out again. Cursing my stupid finger that sent the message, I make for the door, but before I get there, it opens.

Shepard.

Ah, hell. Here we go. "Ah, Shepard. Guess you, ah, got my message."

Her eyebrows arch. "What message?"

She came down here just to see me, just to talk with me. I feel torn between two emotions – elation, and it's about fucking time.

"Ah, never mind," I say, hoping my voice sounds steady. I'm surprised that it does. "Just something I wanted to talk to you about, but it can wait. What brings you down here?" Because it's been awhile.

"Okay, yeah," she says. "I want to know if you have any contacts that can keep an eye on Hagalaz for me. I know Liara's capable, but . . ." She trails off, and I can see the concern on her face.

"You want a couple extra eyes watching her back," I say, without even thinking about it. Of course she does.

She smiles. "Yeah, something like that."

I love her smile. I hate how much I love her smile. "I know of three guys off the top of my head – one from my days at C-Sec who became a freelance mercenary, and two I know from Omega. All three will do the job for money. But they're good. And once they commit, they'll see it through." I see the relief in her face, in her posture. "I'll send their contact information to your terminal." I want to throw myself out the nearest airlock. But really, what the hell else am I going to do? Deny her help? That's not in me, not for her.

"Thanks, Garrus." She pauses. "How you been? I feel like I haven't been down here in ages."

That's because you haven't. "Well," I say, "you've been pretty busy. No problem, though – you always know where to find me."

She leans up against the door jamb. "Yeah, but I've missed you, Garrus. Things have been . . . well, crazier than usual, but I miss coming down here, hanging out with you."

She is actually killing me.

"I mean, hell," she goes on. "With almost everyone else, I'm Commander Shepard – Savior of the Citadel. It's really . . . annoying." She smirks. "But you know, we've worked together for a while now. It's good talking to someone I know. Someone I trust. There's a hell of a lot less of that in the galaxy than there ought to be."

"Yeah," I say, because I can't think of anything else to say. And then, I find myself saying, "Shepard, you know what we need? We need a bar on this goddamn ship."

She laughs. "Hell, yes! That's a great idea, Garrus!" She looks towards my footlocker. "Hey, that reminds me, you got any of that Batarian ale left?"

I grin. I'm actually starting to relax a bit. She always does that to me. And she's the only one. "Yeah, I might have a couple bottles left."

I get out the bottles and pop the tops with my talon. She was so impressed the first time I did that.

"Cheers," she says as I hand her one. She tips the bottle back in my direction.

I return the gesture. "Cheers to you, Shepard," I say.

"Garrus, when we're off duty, just call me Hera. We've known each other long enough for that." I do not show how much what she just said means to me.

"Okay, Hera," I say, trying the name out. We both tip the ale back. It burns a bit, but man, the flavor is fantastic. It really lingers.

And then, as she lowers the bottle, I catch a . . . tightening in her face. Like a shadow passing over. And I'm not the smartest man alive, but I know where it came from. I could ignore it . . . ah, hell, no I can't. "So, Comm- ah, Hera. You and Liara? You've . . . worked things out?"

She looks at me, the smirk reappearing from the shadow. "You know me too well. You know that, Garrus?"

If it wasn't for the smirk, I'd change the subject. "Well, maybe I do," I say instead.

"Yeah. Yes," she says. "We have worked things out. Very . . . thoroughly."

I kind of want to die right now.

She sighs. "But it just means I'm going to miss her all over again."

And for a moment, my heart breaks a little – not for me, but for her. I don't know what to say, but I come up with, "Yeah, but it's good to have someone to miss. Someone you know you'll be coming back to. It's a good thing . . . a good thing to see."

I glance at my terminal, and I think of the only other one who ever was close to me. And now . . .

She clears her throat. "Yeah, Garrus. You're right. You're right. It is good. Thanks." I turn to see her smiling at me, but her eyes, well, human eyes, you can tell when there's something going on behind them. And I realize, I've just seen her, hurting for Liara, and she's just seen me, hurting for Lidia. The fact that we saw each other in this moment lightens my heart. I feel . . . bold.

"Anyway, Garrus," she says, breaking our gaze. "You said you sent me a message?"

Ah, crap.

"It's nothing, really, I'm just . . ." I set my bottle down and look at her. "You know, I work pretty well alone. I can go where I want, do what I want, when I want – I have focus. No distractions. Just the job. I don't need much. And it's good - I think, working that way, I make some small difference in the Galaxy."

"A lot more than that, Garrus."

I shrug, even though I'm touched by the compliment. "Maybe. But sometimes . . . well, I like to see what you and Liara have. And sometimes, I think, maybe I'd like something like that, too."

She smiles. "Thanks, Garrus. It's good. It is. But you know, it's also . . . complicated." She takes a breath. "Boy, that word doesn't even cover it. I died. She almost became . . . someone else. And both of us thought the other had moved on. When I think about it, I'm amazed we managed to find the space together." She chuckles. "It's really a mess!" She looks at me. "Who knows, maybe you're the lucky one."

"Huh, maybe." I don't feel lucky.

She raises her eyebrows.

I suddenly can't face her and turn away. "I'm glad for you, though. It's a . . . good mess. I never thought I'd say this, but maybe sometimes a mess is better. But for me, well . . . there's no one . . . available. And that's my fault. I don't really know how . . . I spend so much energy keeping people at arm's length – "

She interrupts. "Well, that's certainly saying something."

I turn back see her looking at my arms. I can't help but feel a little thrill go up my spine. "Yeah, I guess it is." I chuckle. How does she do this, make me talk when I just want to shut up? "But maybe I don't do enough to let people in. I just – well, sometimes I feel like I'm alone in the whole damn galaxy. I've been thinking about it a lot lately – maybe I'm a poorer man for that . . . I don't know, maybe I'm just getting old, thinking of where I might be down the relay." I start to feel like I'm saying too much, like I've already said too much. I want to change the subject. "Hell, I don't know why I bother thinking about this. We're not likely to survive this mission anyway."

But – typical Shepard – she won't let it go. "But you are thinking about it."

"Yeah." Dammit. "Yeah, I am." And then I look at her, and I see her being, well, who she is. For me. "Thanks, Shepard. There isn't really anyone else I'd want to talk to about this." And then it hits me, and my boldness returns. She deserves to know the truth. I step right up to her. "You know what I was saying about arm's length? Well, there's not many who've managed to get beyond that. In fact, ah, there's just one. It's good to have someone I can . . . trust." I take a breath and look her right in the eye. "It's you, Shepard. I'm a better man because of you. And I . . . I just . . ."

The words fail me, right when I need them the most.

I see her face soften, suddenly, and I know she knows. She understands.

I can't stand it. I turn my back on her. "Ah, never mind."

I feel her hands on me as she turns me back around. "Hey."

I look right at her. I am certain everything I'm feeling is plain upon my scarred face.

She rests her hands on my shoulders, and I see a thousand emotions playing across her face. "Garrus, I want you to know something. I trust you, too. I don't make a habit of that. And I don't let people get close to me easily or often, either." She pauses. "In this life, you and I are . . . .what we are. And I'm thankful for that." She nods. "But in another life . . ." She looks right into my eyes. "Garrus, yes. Yes."

I can feel something loosen in my chest. I know what she's saying, and although it kills me, I feel a surge of warmth throughout my whole body. She cares, she really does. It's not perfect, it's not the same thing I feel, but . . . I am important to her. I nod, and then I feel a real smile cross my face. "Hearing you say that . . . in this life . . . is . . . almost as good. Almost as good as another life."

[scalamore]

Refresher on how Lari feels about House Belois

For some reason, some readers think that Lari still cares and loves House Belois.... (eh?)

Recall manhwa Ch 112/113. Lari wanted to just move on from the whole thing with Rupert and House Belois. The look of horror on her face when she saw Lehan, a member of House Belois again: that's not a look of love/concern for her family. It's the look of utter despair.

She ABSOLUTELY doesn't want to see him again, or get close to him. IN the Novel, she actually used lightning alchemy to get him to stay a distance away, because the mule kept on trying to get closer.

As Lari clearly says, she knows Lehan and Trash dad only care about her bloodline, and not her... unlike Rupert. She was mistaken and trusted the wrong people. She SHOULD have trusted in Rupert, and that's her fault. She admits it. She clearly tells Lehan, she wants them to treat her as if she were dead. She wants no more involvement with House Belois anymore. SHE's DONE. Lehan tries to grab her, and says that he won't tell anyone, he'll willingly betray the Count... but Lari doesn't respond and just says goodbye, with the intention of a forever goodbye. The next chapter, Lari's not surprised that Lehan followed and tracked her down. (he didn't listen #1). She's also not surprised that he failed to tell the Count she was dead (he didn't listen #2), and not pleased that he tried to guilt her by telling her Amanda was sad and distraught. Again, he insists that his life's goal is to protect her - and Lari again, tells him she doesn't want his protection. She never asked for any of this. But because he's a stubborn mule, she allows him to continue to visit her... because she wants the occasional update on how Rupert is doing. She forgave Lehan somewhat slightly, because at least now Rupert has Lehan as an ally. She doesn't like Lehan's visits, and kicks him out all the time, but she's not the one who throws a tantrum - she politely hangs out with him, but she doesn't treat him the same anymore. In summary: - She tolerates Lehan, because he gives her updates about Rupert, the one she actually misses. Lehan also gives her updates about Trash dad and the political situation. She doesn't like any of his flirting or gifts.

- She doesn't want anything to do with the Count anymore. As a nice person, she doesn't want him hurt, and she does appreciate how he acted like a good father in the past, but she's moved on and isn't looking back. She's more than willing to harm him to protect Rupert (future novel event), doesn't care about his opinion/blessing when she wants to marry Rupert, and while Rupert wants to release him from confinement so she doesn't worry, Lari flat out says she doesn't care about him and Rupert can do whatever he wants to him LOL. (Eventually he's released from confinement from the Capital mansion and is allowed to go back to Belois)

- Lari is still close to Amanda.

- Lari invited Lehan, Amanda, the Nanny, and the butler to her wedding. She ignored the Count.

- Lari can't ever forgive the Count for using her her whole life, but she will NEVER forgive him for the way he treated Rupert in both timelines. She's fiercely protective of her hubby and will choose Rupe's happiness every time over the trash. <3

[avelera]

“Ted Lasso” critical opinion here, but while I still enjoy the show and make time to watch it within a day of it coming out, they’re so conflict-shy about having anyone be the central villain, or even the central antagonist of an episode, that the whole plot has gone to mush.

(Now just to be clear, I’m criticizing the show’s dramatic structure, not the relative merits of the characters or their individual stories. That’s subjective and people love their favorites and that’s fine. But the show, right now in Season 3 as of episode 8, has no villain or central antagonist and thus no plot other than a vague ambling towards the direction of the final game.)

Rebecca was a stellar villain in Season 1. Her having a redemption arc and a sympathetic backstory doesn’t make her any less structurally the villain. Her role as the villain glued the season together, it offered a powerful focusing factor to the arc and it gave someone for Ted Lasso as our protagonist to face off against, even if he didn’t always know it. As the villain she was the gravity that pulled the story together.

Though it is much panned by many writers, the fact is, having a hero, villain, and a love interest with a central plot of the hero keeping the villain from getting what they want (and an emotional B plot of everyone getting what they need even if it wasn’t what they wanted at the start) is a really strong central story that propels a narrative. Combining villain and love interest is possible and also compelling but notice, whenever Rebecca was in the role of love interest in Season 1, Rupert was brought in to pick up the villain slack. Rupert’s presence kept a villain in the picture to propel the story when Rebecca was busy in that other role.

Now, Rupert has had some walk on moments of villainy in S2 and S3 since then, but besides those moments… who the fuck is our villain in season 3? Who is the plot arrayed against? What is our hero, presumably still Ted, trying to achieve? What does Ted want? Honestly, what does anyone want at this point that they’re taking material steps to achieve and that is being kept from them by a villain or antagonist of some sort? What is this plot about other than Richmond maybe stumbling its way into a championship by the end?

The lesson of Rebecca being so beautifully humanized at the end of S1 and getting that wake-up call from Higgins to stop acting like a cartoon villain and realize everyone here is human was a fantastic story beat. But the lesson from it wasn’t that there shouldn’t ever be a villain. Rebecca having a redemptive moment of realizing she’s been an ass to everyone who actually cares about her, that she’s sacrificing her present to get revenge for her past, is still absolutely beat for beat a standard part of a villain arc. She’s still a villain even if she gets redeemed at the end. S1 had a strong central story of hero vs villain as a result and the humanity of the characters in an otherwise cartoonish plot was what elevated the story to critical acclaim.

Now… everyone is just too damn humanized. And the thing is, you can still humanize people and have them be antagonists, or even outright villains! You can have story conflict that isn’t a huge angry fight, it’s just different people who want different things that are in conflict with what the other person wants and prevents them from getting it. It’s actually a completely natural set up for “Ted Lasso” because it’s a sports story for goodness sake. Everyone wants to win! Everyone has a good reason to win that’s just as valid as anyone else’s. Everyone is working hard to win the trophy and has their own reasons to deserve it, and that puts good people in conflict with one another.

But no one is the villain in Season 3, or even a consistent antagonist taking material steps to stop the hero from getting what he or she wants. Not even Nate, who was perfectly set up to be the dark mirror to Ted this season, with a cold, severe coaching style based on a lifelong understanding of the game, but with no social skills to balance it. A true head to head of the Lasso method vs the method of his protege, the man he gave a chance to shine when no one else did. (Don’t even get me started on the dropped potential for a plotline that takes into account Nate’s age and the racism he undoubtedly felt in his career to still be a kit man at his age, a role that was next taken by a white teenage boy, and despite the skill he’s shown as a coach the minute he was given a chance. Where did all of that go? Nate had legitimate grievances of being overlooked and then achieving his dream despite this and being good at it, but I digress.)

Maybe we’re being set up for a banger finale, a few hours of really tightly plotted story that brings this all together, and we’re just killing time until we get there. I certainly hope so. Because story tropes exist for a reason. Keeley and Roy and Jamie’s love triangle story in S1 was a standard romance trope but it was well applied and that made it work. Ted vs Rebecca is a trope right out of Air Bud, for goodness sake, but it worked because it was well applied.

There’s no tropes happening right now in S3. There’s no plot. There’s no villain. There’s nothing for this story to coalesce around. Maybe it’ll all come together for a banger finale but man… man, I really hope it does.

[mihrsuri]

Some more in universe fictional fandom discussion in the Tudors OT3 Cinematic Unvierse inspired by @nocompromise-noregrets and also some other things. @herawell

Pre Unmasked did you clock what was going on if you didn’t know the history?

niceiceblock

50,000 notes

I didn’t.

This isn’t actually a critique of the way the show depicted that storyline - they are making a story at base, not a history (though it’s beautiful and accurately done) and that means there are going to be some dramatic reveals, including with things like this that not a lot of people know because it’s such a recent revelation, though I think you could argue about whether they should have made it clear from the start, I don’t think so.

I think in a lot of ways us/fandom at large not getting it is making a point about the way predators like Norwich work - they don’t broadcast themselves with giant signs saying I Am A Monster - they often look like Rupert Graves! They are charming! They have what can look like chemistry with the people they abuse (thinking about the times people have said ‘but they were such a cute couple’ about a later to be revealed abusive relationship between public figures).

And also it’s about fandom and seeing two very attractive men (in particular men) together and going NOW KISS and kind of reverse engineering the interpretation that it has to be romantic and kind of…ignoring the layers going on. I’m indicting myself here as well - I was looking at things through a shipping lens and so I did not see say, the work that James Frain was doing with his body - the way he looked so so small around Norwich, the flinch/tension he was carrying, the way that Rupert Graves plays that possessiveness in Norwich’s eyes but James does that things where he’s just avoiding looking at Norwich directly - that dissociation where he’s clearly (when you look at it post reveal) avoiding the reality in front of him/back being a small child again. It’s the ‘you ruined any trace of me’ referring to the branding that so many people used in edits when the episode trailer came out.

But that’s in retrospect, for me.

coveryourtears

I got it but I don’t think that means I’m morally superior or anything (like is some of it painful person experience? Possibly yes). I didn’t know the history but there was just for me there was something so off about Norwich that I couldn’t put my finger on at all and then I went ‘…OH SHIT’ at the reveal (which I am so glad they put content warnings pre episode so people could make choices about their viewing) as much as anyone.

I am however morally superior to the people actually genuinely defending John Norwich though. Go step on legos and may you forever be trapped listening to a Restorationist video essay.

lareginatara

I knew the history and let me say it’s been An Experience biting my lip through everything. AN EXPERIENCE AND A HALF (thank you oh group chat and discord for bearing with my feels upon the subject). I had this Dread ever since the Norwich casting was announced because oh fuck the norwich thirsting is going to happen.

(To the people whining about how they were Deceived And This Was Problematic I just….I can’t. Sometimes Stories Will Pull A Surprise On You People)

semperlyqueerly

But it was a different time - people married young then - I wouldn’t defend John today but in the context and time in which he lived it would have been fine - you can see he took such good care of Thomas (all those gifts! You all love it so much when H8 and Anne give him gifts and talk about how it’s a love language. The fact that he gave him an education and took him out of poverty and away from his abusive father. And Thomas does consent - he said yes when Norwich asked him to ‘come to my bed Antonius’ - you can’t say he didn’t consent). John didn’t deserve to be abandoned so cruelly after everything he did for Thomas - my heart always breaks for him when I watch him see Gregory for the first time, that his great love moved on so fast.

antoniusandcaesar

Silence actual factual pedophile excuser and I don’t throw that around in fandom debates but that is what you are and I refuse to give you the time of day.

lareginatara