#does it matter. in ohtori does it ever matter

[hirokiyuu]

twst 3sen: night raven college but its actually ohtori academy aka utena au

The bride is taller than Leona, or perhaps shorter, or perhaps the same height--it's hard to tell on the staircase, on the shifting tilted platform of the arena, the lights of the castle above casting dizzying shapes. The only easy part is when he puts a hand on the bride's waist, bends the bride back, and draws his sword from the bride's chest, red skirts billowing around them like petals. Every time he does the bride smiles at him, strange and blank and distant, and every time he never bothers to smile back.

[nodutra19]

Rambling

Reading RGU analysis always makes me feel dumb as shit. I'm a heavy reader but outside some manga and videogames, I've pretty much neglected visual mediums, so watching RGU was a very strange experience. I love it, I just feel tiny in comparison to everyone else who seems to get it, unlike I.

Obviously, Ohtori Academy is a coffin, a trap, an arrest of development. From Sôji's fixation on Tokiko to Akio's obsession with becoming Dios, the rotten ideal in white, everyone has to disassemble what they've been taught. Juri has to let go of Shiori, and everyone has to let go of these stupid and harmful games and ideas. One thing I did struggle with understanding until now was how possible it was for Miki and Kozue, Nanami and Tôga to have healthy familial relationships after everything.

I realized I was thinking too rigidly, in spite of my planned no-contact with my own family. CLAMP once said "Family is other people too" (in xxxHolic). The main thread for all the characters in RGU is the fact they're holding onto something they need to let go of. After everything's that happened, the Kaoru and Kiryû siblings have unsalvagable bonds. That's how I see it anyway. They were already taught horrible things. It's just that on top of that, they've morphed their relationships into something incredibly foul and mephitic. A bit of separation anxiety isn't harmful in itself, but the four of them have festered it into one of the most twisted things I've ever seen. As Ikuhara said in episode 15's commentary, there's this idea that familial relationships are the deepest. "Blood is thicker than water."

The hell of it is, the original line is "The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb." Meaning that what matters more in this world is the bonds you choose. You don't choose where or with whom you are born. But you do choose who you associate with. Obviously there's a lot of complexity about the interactions between the individual and the collective, the individual and the structures about the individual, but ultimately a choice is a choice.

Family bonds are just as fragile as any other. They're just as fleeting, just as prone to deterioration. They're not eternal as we're taught, hence the revolving, spiraling incest throughout the show. We're taught family is forever, and so it's no wonder the Kaoru, Kiryû, and Himemiya siblings have the dynamics they do. They represent different forms of what this sort of thinking leads to. Especially Akio. After all, a Prince is a member of Royalty, no? And we all know what Royalties throughout our histories commit in order to be "pure." This thinking is what traps so many into cycles of familial abuse. If we were to treat family as we treat "outsiders" (because that's how we're taught to think of anyone outside the family), if our lenses were shaped to this analysis, if our retinas were shaped to recognize these true colors, I'd say most of us would never like our families from the jump. It's much the same way adults justify beating their children and yet if anyone even their age beat on them whenever they made a mistake, you bet your fucking ass they'd fight back. But if it's family, it's suddenly different, when really it isn't.

Hell, this is part of why we say "bro," "homie," "twin," "brother," "sister" to people we're extremely close with. Even I do that. Found family is a wonderful thing, but if "Family is other people too," then how does "found family" factor into things? If we're so rebellious against things such as the nuclear family structure, if we understand that family doesn't determine anything, then what use is found family? If we so despise these structures, why do we mimic it? Are we like Utena who say "I'm completely different from you, Saionji/Tôga/Juri/Miki/Sôji/Akio" when we're mimicking said structure? Is what we seek in these relationships undefinable in the lexicon we're given? If family is as fleeting and prone to death as any other bond, then what's the worth of referring to these non-familial bonds in terms of family? Maybe that's part of why this show has so many fucking orphans and/or absent parents.

I'm not saying you should stop feeling sisterly or brotherly to that one friend who just seems to get you. Really, I'd be a massive hypocrite if I did. But it's still something to chew on, I think. I can't provide any answers though.

I hope this has been insightful in some way. I feel late as hell to the party. One of these days I'mma go through all of Empty Movement.

[aroanthy]

thinking about kanae and her relationship with her parents and akio and his relationship with her parents and just like…. ideas about patriarchs and fathers and family in utena. and incest obviously. you know there’s something so horrifying about kanae’s situation, beyond the obvious fact that she’s not yet graduated high school and she’s being married off to a child predator who is using their relationship to levy more power over more children. and her mum. and the fact that we don’t ever SEE her dad. fathers in utena have, shall we say, the worst track record in the book. i have so many things that i want to say about representations of Adult Men in rgu and specifically representations of fathers but it all circles back to their absence and imitation.

like, okay. i think the only (non-silhouetted, ie Actual Flesh) father we see is miki’s, and even then we don’t see his face. similarly we don’t see kanae’s mum’ face though she too is a Flesh Parent. don’t even get me started on how the only two visual representation of utena’s parents are their coffins and graves. also don’t get me started on that One shot from episode 10 that i use in all of my amvs of the silhouetted kiryuu parents because as you can probably tell from my heavy use of it in my amvs, i find it a deeply fascinating shot. swagever. all of this is to say, dads are not In The Flesh in utena.

im excluding the movie from this discussion bc whilst im a diehard aou lover and would never normally eclipse it from my analysis like this, the choices it makes in representing touga’s father break with rgu’s typical stylistic choices in a way that i honestly think is less effective. that whole sequence is incredibly visually rich in every other way and includes symbology that is some of the most compelling in all of rgu, imho, but it’s like. gahhh. i know it’s an active choice to represent him as Just A Guy, and you could argue ‘well akio’s Just A Guy’ but it’s. it just irritates me. i don’t think it’s meaningful in the way that utena likes to be meaningful. id argue that seeing his face doesn’t contribute anything, but idk maybe i just don’t like looking at his horrible face. it’s probably just that but also im right it’s a lacking stylistic choice

rambling side note aside, i get to my actual point that i technically already alluded to: akio. akio’s not a dad but akio is positioned as a (pseudo?)father figure to (checks notes) anthy, utena, kanae (hey remember she’s what started this post lol), touga, id throw nanami in, you could probably make a tangential argument for miki and kozue, ruka’s an interesting one, and mikage (maybe??). this is for a couple of reasons. he’s the (acting) chairman of the school that all the characters i just listed attend, he’s the guardian/caregiver for three or four of them, and, fundamentally, he guides and governs their lives to the best of his ability (not in the sense that he’s trying really hard to raise these kids, in the sense that he’s trying to control them. lol). BUT. crucially. he is an approximation of a father, an imitation of the patriarch, even and especially to anthy.

why does this matter? well, funnily(?) enough it circles back to why i dislike aou’s choice to portray touga’s father as A Guy. the powerful men in ohtori— and when i say ‘powerful’ here, i specifically mean men who are not marginalised, men who are not racialised, men who come from money and have never had to reach the top of the tower, rather always resided at its summit— are not seen by us. akio is the acting chairman, the acting father, the stand-in who stood up for something that is altogether worse than him, that made him who he is in such an insidious way. and i just think that’s really fucking interesting to think about wrt his status as a brown man, being racialised, being The Thing That We See when everything else— the inappropriate vice principal, miki’s piano teacher, mr ohtori, mr kiryuu (anime version), even off-hand dialogue from shadow girls about adult men in positions of power like mr judge (papa! daddy! god!!)— is obfuscated and implied. and i don’t want to suggest that that’s an intentional commentary on the racist mythologising of brown and black men as innately sexually violent, because. It’s Not. and utena massively drops the ball wrt race, but because of that lack of explicit, intentional commentary, it creates this strange dynamic between akio, the only racialised man in the show, and Every Other Guy. and that’s a very long-winded way of saying ‘maybe poisoning mr ohtori was a good thing actually’

[transmascutena]

Do you think Anthy and Akio have literal parents?

great question! i will fully take this as an excuse to ramble, because i have thoughts on this but not ones that really lead anywhere.

the presence (or lack thereof) of parents in utena is something i've been meaning to talk about for a long time, because it's so interesting in a show that's so heavily about abuse within the family. most significant, i think, is utena being an orphan which shapes so much of who she is and what she goes through. most other characters either never mention their parents or we get brief glimpses in flashbacks. the kiryuu parents are especially interesting because of all the vague Implications in the show and then the actual reveal of what they're like in the movie.

that's getting off track a little though. anthy and akio are..... well. complicated in all sorts of ways. i think it's so interesting to think about how much of their situation is literal vs metaphorical. i personally tend to read most of what is shown about them as metaphor, as in, they are not really immortal, they are not magic or gods, anthy is not a witch etc. they're just two people. they are just a younger sister and her older brother. they are just a teenage girl and her abuser. the narrative mythologizes them and their history to obfuscate that abuse.

anthy and akio, within the show, do not have parents. they never mention any, even when anthy talks to utena about family, and they're obviously not shown in the cabin flashback story either. there's not even a hint or implication of anything about any family they may or may not have aside from each other. anthy does tell utena that akio is "like a father" to her, and that to me implies that if they ever did have parents, they don't anymore, and haven't for a long time. akio is anthy's guardian and caretaker. and you can read a lot into that if you wanted to. if i did have to give an answer to their literal family situation, i'd guess their parents died before anthy was old enough to remember them, and akio has raised her since. and that they have probably never even talked about them to each other either.

ultimately, though, i think the reason we're not told or show anything about it is because.. it doesn't really matter at the end of the day. their parents are not in the picture, and that's just how it is. unlike utena, anthy doesn't seem affected by it. she's obviously affected by a lot about her family situation, but lack of parents isn't part of it.

to get back to your question i think the answer is yes but no. literal real world: yes, they had parents because they had to come from somwhere. ohtori metaphor world: no, because they don't matter to the narrative.

[yellowmagicalgirl]

within the infant rind of this small flower (poison hath residence and medicine power)

Anthy has had chronic pain for centuries. After Ohtori, Utena shares it.

This was written for word_docs_and_willowboughs on AO3 for the 2024 Hurt/Comfort Exchange. There are references to both the anime and the movie. I also did some quick research on types of pain meds in Japan, but not too much so there may be some inaccuracies.

AO3

FFN

SquidgeWorld

One day, when Utena doesn’t even have the strength to get out of bed, Anthy brings her a mug of tea, two Eve tablets, and plate with a single cookie so that the Eve doesn’t wreak havoc on Utena’s stomach. Unbidden, Utena remembers how they once threatened to poison each other’s tea and cookies. She lets Anthy feed her anyways.

Her back hurts. The flare-ups happen about once every other month, which is much better than when Utena first left Ohtori. Back then the only times that she didn’t feel the Swords of Hate was when she was dreaming of Anthy, and the pain from when her now-girlfriend had stabbed her through the back managed to outweigh the pain Utena had taken willingly. She had been in the hospital for three weeks as the doctors tried and failed to diagnose the cause of their pain.

“Back when he was still fighting everyone’s battles, I’d make this sort of tea for him,” Anthy said in a low voice. She doesn’t have to say Dios’s name for Utena to know who she is speaking of. The haunted look in her eyes is enough. “Back when he was still trying to save me, just to save me, he would make the tea for me. He wouldn't make it as well, though. Our pain medications weren’t as good as they are now. The best we had just made you sleep it off. I still felt the pain in my sleep; I was just too weak to really move.”

Weakly, Utena lifts her hand to place it on top of Anthy’s. Anthy twists her hand to hold Utena’s. Even now that they’ve both escaped and found each other again, far from where Akio can find them, it can be hard to convince Anthy to take a new medication when she’s sick, especially if one of the side-effects is drowsiness. She didn’t get sick back at Ohtori, not unless her current Betrothed wanted a sick girl to dote over.

“I didn’t put any of the herbs we used to use in this tea,” Anthy continues, using her other hand to tuck a strand of long hair behind her ear. The closest she ever does to pinning it up anymore is tying it back in a braid or ponytail, but most of the time she leaves it loose. More than once, Anthy has talked about just cutting it all off. She hasn’t yet, though, no matter how many times Utena has said she could pull off short hair if she wanted to.

“It just has a similar flavor. Not the same, though; the herbs had made it more bitter, and I didn’t add any sweetener.” It isn’t poisoned. I’m sorry.

There really is no need for apologies, not anymore. But Utena is in too much pain to have that argument. She suspects she’ll still be in pain in an hour after the Eve kicks in, and she’ll have to take it easy. It’s a shame, because she had actually been planning on cooking something nice tonight, but the cast iron skillet she plans on using is heavy, and Utena won’t be able to lift it on her own. Maybe she’ll ask Anthy to help her. Maybe she’ll just have to hope that Anthy won’t feel guilty enough to cook the meal herself, and that Utena can fry the tonkatsu in a couple days when she can lift things again. The pork should still be safe and unspoiled in the fridge until then.

[sillybayo]

Snow Duel

(Originally uploaded on fanfiction.net on 6/23/24)

A utenanthy fic thats silly and fun. Utena wakes up to snow falling outside her window, and excitedly brings Anthy along to enjoy the day...however, she has never played in the snow before, so Utena must show her the joys that come with it.

The sun rose and peeked through the curtains, poking Utenas face. The gradual warmth caused her to stir, and once her eyes met the window, she saw pure white mixed with the pale blue sky. A familiar feeling bubbled up in her, something that she hasn't felt ever since she was a small girl.

She hopped out of bed instinctively, and instead of rushing to her parents room at the end of the house, she found herself going across the hall, knocking gently, yet excitably, on Anthys door.

"Himemiyaa! Himemiya!"

It took a minute or two until Anthy opened the door in her usual nightgown and bonnet, rubbing her eyes and noticeably a bit irritated. "Utena…what's the matter?"

Utena bounced in place and smiled at her in contrast. "It's snowing!"

"Snowing?"

"Mhm! You know, when it rains, but the temperature is too cold, so little bits of ice fall instead?"

Anthy looked more awake, but not any less bothered. "I know what it is, but it doesn't seem to be a huge deal," She paused to let out a good yawn. "It's only ice.."

Utena stopped mid bounce. "Only ice!?"

The two promised to be more open to each other. And Utena's glad that Anthy is being more honest and expressive! But she'd be lying if she said that her lack of enthusiasm didn't halt her momentum.

But in retrospect…it does make sense. Ohtori Academy looked like it was stuck in a constant late spring. It rained sometimes, but there was no snow, no change in the leaves, anything. Utena assumed that Anthy lived there all her life up until now, where they lived together in a nice cozy cottage. Anthy proposed the idea herself, six months ago, when she left Ohtori and found Utena. So it would make sense for her to not know about the enjoyment that comes from snow.

Utena, meanwhile, had a vague memory of it. The days where she'd hop on her parents bed, then pull them out of bed, and then they'd all go out in the freezing cold early in the morning. They didn't mind it though, as they were occupied with throwing snowballs and making snowmen. She remembers the silly childish nature that made her happier than almost anything else ever would.

Would it be too much to ask to share that joy with Anthy?

"Could you go outside with me, please? Just put on the warmest coat you have, a sweater, two pairs of pants, some gloves, earmuffs, boots," She counted all of those things with her fingers. Anthy adored the way she spoke with her hands. "And you'll be good to go! Come onn, it'll be fun! You won't regret it!"

Anthy couldn't help but to smile at her pleading eyes. "Fine, just this once."

"YES!" She jumped and pumped her fists in the air. She then rushed into her room and shut the door, presumably to go change.

What has Anthy agreed to…?

—

"...What's so fun about this?"

Anthy stared at the white blanket in front of them, and the trees that were sprinkled with white powder. There were icicles hanging above the door frame, and snowflakes fell before their eyes.

"I'll show you!" Utena took Anthys hand, and led her into the snow. She then crouched down and formed a ball as carefully as she could. Anthy watched the process with curiosity, what could you possibly do with something as small and delica—

The ball smacked her in the shoulder and crumbled.

Utena couldn't stop herself from giggling. "Did I hit you too hard? I'm sorry!"

Oh. Ok.

Anthy sees how it is now.

She then traced Utenas movements from earlier, rolling and gathering the snow into a sphere, and then swiftly attacking Utena with it. But one ball wasn't enough! The thrill rose up inside of Anthy, Utena could throw back at any moment! So she made another one and stood up as fast as she could. She lost some balance (the two pairs of jeans weren't helping, they only stiffened her movement), but she managed to chuck one in Utenas direction. But she dodged it! And while Anthy wasn't paying attention, she made not one, not two, but three snowballs! And they crashed into Anthy one by one.

So then the war began.

Dozens of snowballs were thrown across the yard. Utena hid behind the trees, Anthy hid behind the bushes. Utenas movements were much quicker and harder to predict, but Anthy was able to hide and move to different areas almost instantaneously, rewarding her with a good hit into Utenas sides and back.

Though, eventually, Anthy rolled out of the bushes to the right of Utena, when she could've sworn that she was just in front of her. She laid on the ground, her dark and curly purple hair contrasting with the harsh white snow, and she breathed in and out, trying to catch her breath from all of the fighting. But she couldn't stop laughing. Everytime it got quiet and Utena thought she was ok, giggles erupted from Anthy again and again. After a while, Utena got down beside her.

"I-I can't remember the last time I've had this much fun…" Anthy breathed.

"Thank you for going out here with me." Utena booped her beautiful hooked nose.

"Of course…" She let out one last huff before simply looking into Utenas eyes.

After a beat or two, Utena rolled on her back and then moved her arms and legs up and down. The sudden movement caught Anthys attention.

"What are you doing?"

"Making snow angels! Do what I'm doing."

Still puzzled, Anthy adjusted her position and then mimicked Utenas technique out of pure curiosity. Though, her limbs soon started to ache, and the freezing snow pierced her all over. Not to mention her curls intertwining with the wet powder, which will undoubtedly tangle and cause a lot more trouble than usual. This is on the list of things that Anthy believes only she can understand. Soon, she got tired and stood up.

"You're done already?" Utena asked as she also stood up.

"It's cold..." she rubbed the sides of her arms, hugging herself. "What is a snow angel anyways?"

"Look behind you!"

Anthy then turned to see two particular shapes pressed into the snow, humanoid figures wearing dresses, and curves on the sides that are meant to imply wings. Utena then stepped around the angels as carefully as possible, went into the bushes, and found a stick, using it to carefully draw a narrow circle above each of them.

"Tadaaa! Now they're really snow angels!" she beamed.

"Why do you like doing this, Utena?"

"Hm? It's just simple fun. I used to do this with my parents, but now I have you! I thought it was a nice opportunity to have a nice morning with y—ACHOO!" she rubbed her nose midspeech, and her body made her sneeze one more time for good measure.

"You're very sweet, but we should go indoors. It's far too cold out here."

"G-good idea…"

[moistvonlipwig]

for the ask game this question - the character who I do not understand - for utena . i'm doubting that there's anyone u don't get though lol

omg i love ur faith in me....there is someone i struggle to get tho! i'm just gonna do all the questions if u don't mind...

The first character I fell in love with: Utena, I was like wow she's just like me fr <3

The character who is my ‘baby’: Utena and Anthy and Miki and Nanami are all so YOUNG like yes the others are teenagers too but they're middle schoolers bro 😭 they're actual Babies

The character who I do not understand: Mikage confounds me...like I think there's some really interesting commentary his character is doing on the social construct of the "genius" and he works very well as a foil to Utena and I think his flashback episodes are very good. But his deal with Tokiko is so ??? what does he want from her??? Also what was up with those 100 boys, did he kill them or not 😳 and the thing is that does make his character really interesting to think about, I kind of like that there's this big part of RGU that I still struggle to comprehend and that can be read in so many ways, it keeps me on my toes. But also it kind of frustrates me because, much like Mikage, I think I am the smartest specialest person ever and so I hate not understanding things on the first try lol.

The character that I think the show ruined: No one because it is a good show :)

The most attractive male and female character: In terms of character design I have to give it to Anthy and Saionji. Both of them have such luscious locks.

The character death that was the worst for me: The death of the idealized childhood past that you can never return to no matter how strongly you desire it

The character that is the most like me: Utena but also Miki tbh.

The character I think the writer(s) love: I think they loved Nanami as is good and proper.

The character that I just want to be happy: Anthy bbgrill I hope you're doing okay. Same for Utena. And Nanami my steak egg alien girl we gotta get you out of Ohtori!!!

My four favorite characters, past or present: Nanami Kiryuu, Utena Tenjou, Anthy Himemiya, Chu-Chu :3

My four least favorite characters, past or present: Souji Mikage because my difficulty understanding him also means I don't really connect with him emotionally at all, Akio Ohtori who I dislike more than Mikage but I refuse to put him first because he is not even special or cool enough to be my least favorite and also baby Dios makes me sad so he gets one (1) point for that, Keiko sorry girl but whyyy do you like that man, and Touga Kiryuu the That Man in question who gets one (1) more point than Keiko for being a confirmed Cat Guy.

[docholligay]

Brotherly love

So I was thinking about Anthy and Utena, and how both Anty and Utena considered their brothers princes, and what an intersting contrast it is between them. Both Touga and Akio are dead, and both can only live int he sort of half world that Ohtori is, but as Akio died after STABBING HIS SISTER which I desperately need to be addressed and feel like is not going to be, falling off a balcony, Touga died trying to save someone else.

And both of them, at this point, invite their sister to stay with them, to be with them in this place, and the difference is that Touga, very quickly supports her decision to leave, to forget about him and let him go, because he IS more princely, which not something I ever thought I was going to say about Touga but we’re in this anime, where Utena is a car, so anything can happen. Akio still wants to keep her trapped, wants to use the power that she has to keep himself around. Will Ohtori straight break when she leaves? I don’t know but evidence seems to support.

And how good a line is this about Anthy’s role at Ohtori? She’s nothing but a dead thing walking around, and Utena awoke something in her. She was Utena’s key but in many ways Utena was hers too, they knocked the rust off of each other and helped each other move forweard. Utena was the thing that Anthy needed, to live. To be a true living thing. 

And I love, LOVE, that Anthy makes this choice, that she gets to be the one who says, “fuck off, Akio” and she does it in the anime too, don’t get me wrong and I think it’s incredibly effectively done in the anime and got me very emotional, but there’s something that confrontational bitches named Doc, who are me, that really loves this straight up yelling at Akio and telling him, “Hey I’m sorry you’re dead and that has to be rough for you, please enjoy the only place you can be anything, i am leaving. 

I adore this. I adore this idea that it doesn’t matter where they are going, because it won’t be here, and Anthy is ready.

[meteorherd]

honestly though if you ask me what my favorite scene in any piece of media ever is its without a doubt the rooftop scene in rgu like my fucking GOD the buildup to it the 36 or so episodes where youre just waiting for either anthy or utena to break down and thne it happens at the same time and shows how the only way to be close to anyone in ohtori is to hurt and manipulate them they both KNEW they were hurting each other but thought it only mattered on their end and they break the fucking cycle by doing something as simple as apologizing my GOD. it does NOT cost zero dollars to be kind kindness is a choice and it DOES take hard work but that doesnt make it any less worth it

[horse-girl-anthy]

I’ve thought a lot about how Akio and Anthy’s racial Otherness operates in the story, and it definitely relies on Orientalist tropes--ironic coming from a Japanese work, but it’s through the influence of Western media and likely some of Japan’s own racial/ethnic politics which I’m not really well qualified to write on. 

we have Anthy and Akio as the sexual deviants--the most overt incest in the show is between them, and they’re written as “corrupting” sexual forces, Akio more so than Anthy. despite the stereotype more often being attached to women, this show is operating in the shoujo genre and thus is designed to appeal to women. Akio is a fantasy of a man who can perfectly please a woman, topped off by his exoticness. Anthy is interesting because you could say she embodies classical Japanese values for women from wealthy families while also fitting into the role of the submissive exotic beauty.

there’s space to question this aspect of the work. however, I’ve recently been considering why it doesn’t bother me more than it does and I’ve come to an answer. 

the important thing to ask is what does their Othering serve in the narrative. Anthy’s Othering in particular is quite important to her character. the Bindi worn by both Akio and Anthy are worthy of analysis, so that aspect of their racialization is character important. but the fact that they have dark skin doesn’t really matter, nor does any idea of foreignness. like, it’s actually kind of weird how NO ONE in RGU ever comments on them looking different. it doesn’t reflect the reality of being a foreigner in Japan, nor does it seem like something that would be overlooked. they are integrated into the society fully--the society of Ohtori. in fact, they are its foundation. 

if RGU deals with gender, Akio and Anthy are prototypes of the gendering process which is undergone by every other character in the work. their racialization can be read to represent the Othering of the parts of the self which it cannot accept--or a projected eroticization on to the Other. most of the male characters want to be like Akio, while Anthy is often rejected and despised while at other times is held up as a trophy.

[whoslaurapalmer]

utena manga AND adolescence manga!!!! the longest of any of my utena posts why did i have so much to say. 

-i do have to say that the box set is amazing. i’ve never owned hardcover manga before!! and the art is really beautiful and i love all the color illustrations....... -also came with a poster!! but i, don’t particularly want naked utena and anthy on my wall. 

-i always love utena, so much  -“it’s not shocking pink, it’s rose! it’s a nice color. i picked it out, after all.” babygirl  (-omg the explanation that there is a list of stylists that she could get uniforms from and at least she picked one on the list) -poor kaido.......he’s the true Pre-Series Friend Who Shows Up In The First Episode And Is Never Heard From Again Once The Plot Kicks In 

-i like that the manga has an explanation of how utena found ohtori academy because, you do wonder -- but i also like how she’s just There in the anime, with absolutely no explanation of how she got There, she’s just There and maybe she’s always been there!, re: time, it ultimately doesn’t matter, it’s where she wound up regardless  -the.......floaty dreaminess of it......... -uggg wait especially because even though it has been akio manipulating her around all this time she still doesn’t truly go to ohtori because of akio she goes because of anthy 

-i’m. look i don’t even want to say it cause this is a straight-up terrible nickname and i am in pain over it but i have to say something  -mr -mr l  -mr  -licky -lick  -i have to wonder how other people have translated that 

-me: hey that looks like he licked the tears off her face??? utena: i named him --  the narrator living inside my brain: and at that moment lulu vandelay considered launching a book across the room for the first time in her twenty-six years of life

-you know utena if your aunt got transfered to amsterdam, you still would’ve wound up at an ohtori academy  -what even happens at the ohtori in amsterdam??????????????  -what  -do they do an exchange program?? do they ever get anyone back??? is amsterdam also creating a world?????? or are they fine over there??? -is it alt universe ohtori???? 

-chu-chu is so fluffy!!!! so soft.......big squish........huggable............ -anthy making him a tie because she felt bad about him not wearing anything!!!! 

-THE MANGA MOVES VERY FAST HONESTLY -especially because i hit a point where i too was reading as fast as possible to get through it but there was still SO MUCH 

-no nanami????? no nanami at all??????? except for that one picture of her???????  -no???????  -look. i really love nanami and i didn’t realize how much i really liked her until she wasn’t there :( cause i liked her in the first place but i miss all her antics :( and i liked where her character arc went a lot :(  -she’s very loud about this but she’s really just that tumblr post that’s like ‘i put ‘i love salsa’ in the chat and no one said anything and i wondered if salsa had killed a parent or if salsa ever really existed’ and that’s relatable  -and the second-guessing embarrassment of every single thing in your life and yet the commitment to radical high-and-mighty confidence about the same exact things to compensate??? good for her!!!! 

-utena, with the power of dios: i can see every move! me: wow didn’t know dios had the sharingan 

-INTRIGUED actually by touga having. a secret room with a big fucking calendar with zodiac symbols and all the fights predetermined  -like there’s something super interesting about that  -like...... -on one hand a physical representation of The Plot Being Controlled. The Plot Has A Map Now. on the other hand, touga has to write it all down like a nerd bc he’s not akio and has no sway himself over the narrative and he needs a reference 

-i’m absolutely fascinated by how a group of people can come together and create The Same Story that is so different in the manga and the anime.....  -just. how  -in a good way and a bad way. in the good way, how do you collaborate with people like that????? in the bad way, how do you create two completely separate thematic takes on the same story  -with so many of the same base scenes!!!! they go completely different ways!!!!! i’m!!!!!!!!!!!! 

-oh i do love the character profiles. i like knowing birthdays!! 

-akio grabbing utena because he thought she was anthy

-it fucking goes from. ‘everyone in this manga wants to fuck touga’ to ‘everyone in this manga will support utena, EVEN TOUGA?????’ like wow  -he’s just.........living with them..................................... -like a creep  -AND HE JUST GIVES UP THE STUDENT COUNCIL PRESIDENCY THAT’S THE FUNNIEST FUCKING THING  -doesn’t take much to get them to break the system down here but they’re still not breaking the system down here  -oh my god it’s like the sad lemon man movie speedrunning the first 3 books and hitting the plot notes with none of the substantial theme  -it’s just, i don’t think the manga is completely terrible, like i think there are some interesting moments but i also know the common perception is The Manga Is Terrible? so i’m like. do i pick out the interesting things and try and give them meaning? or do i just. wholesale agree that this is, on a whole other thematic plane and terrible  (-my whole life is ‘i should be able to make my own opinion on something!’ vs ‘but i like to read other people’s opinions to make sure i don’t miss anything but that should not replace my own capacity for critical thought which i am clearly capable of and did a great deal of work on as a lit major!!’) (oh this is anxiety.) (it’s a lot of ‘i don’t want to misinterpret this in any way because that is a failure on my part so i’m digging around for explanations�� oh that’s still anxiety.) 

-i mean. the emphasis on ‘friendship’ more than anything with anthy is, disappointing, but i DO also like utena trying to get anthy to make friends and that anthy’s first instinct is to take after wakaba because that’s super cute 

-chu-chu narrating the curry story!!  -he’s just such a sweet bean. 

-utena: akio? the devil, lucifer? me, reigning my brain back in as it shoots into hyperdrive: okay lulu you’re right about the tarot symbolism but now is not the time, bring it back, girl  (......utena’s the fool nemuro hall is the tower the car at the end of the movie is the world anthy stabbing utena is the ten of swords (not in the sense of betrayal but in the end of the cycle/story portrayed in the swords suit)) (ANYWAY) 

-and then touga still somehow stays at the center of the story and utena relies on him....... -there’s a bigger reliance on men in the manga that is not, challenged at all, re: touga and dios -but at least akio’s still a full-on creep  -actually i think he unsettled me just a smidge more which was a big accomplishment, considering the time i almost fell over furniture 

-me: oh my god are utena and anthy gonna switch places???  me: NOOOOOOO -anthy’s coffin breaking because utena puts the ring back on....... -but, like........dios is completely incapable of action as well and utena doesn’t need him to rescue anthy  -dios is more some ethereal grand thing here instead of an idealized past self that akio has lost access to and can never regain and was never truly good in the first place  -although utena and anthy switching is, interesting. reinforces akio making utena a princess when again she’s neither and it’s.......a little “in the end, girls are all like rose brides” and women are manipulated around by men, but also, kind of loses what anthy holding the swords meant in the first place? 

-touga: you have to do it, utena me: touga stop trying to steal the scene. get out. get out now 

-THE CASTLE IS REAL????????????????????????? 

-okay the absolute roller coaster between ‘he’s gonna kill dios????’ ‘that’s the manga backstory?????’ ‘DIOS IS JUST DEAD NOW????’ ‘NO HE WAS STILL DIOS THE WHOLE TIME!!!!!!’  -oh but you know you could read it as a, killing your past self sort of thing -...........although that doesn’t really vibe here, does it 

-i think them being specifically ‘gods’ takes away from just the, cycle of humanity kind of thing........ -it’s so pleasantly vague in the anime because how dios came to be Dios and why anthy had to put a stop to it just doesn’t matter. it’s not what matters. it’s not what’s important. the fact that it happened at all is what matters.  -and somehow he still wasn’t dios the whole time!!!!!  -“she kept his sword in her bosom, one last token of her love!” that’s an.........interesting way to put it -i mean, yeah maybe?? but also, no?????????????????????????????? 

-anthy’s kind of, watered down a little in the manga too, in a way?  -STABBING UTENA WAS SO IMPORTANT TOO 

-noooooo where are my girls learning that it’s not about being a prince and that it’s just genuine love and being there for someone  -i mean i guess the love is here but. “i must be the prince myself” no!!!! noooooooooo  -you know what i don’t even want to THINK about akio and utena..........like that 

-AND THERE’S STILL TOUGA!!! IN THE MIDDLE OF IT ALL!!!!!!!!!! TOUGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA  -anthy: /wearing utena’s uniform me: /staring into the camera like i’m on the office 

-like...............well that just continues the cycle then, doesn’t it, in a way  -which, is its own kind of story.............. -and i guess you could also make a case for ‘well no one’s immediately recovered right after a story that takes time and it’s not always perfect and that could involve anthy emulating utena’ -BUT NO!!!! NO??????? NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  -i think that’s giving the manga too much credit considering how much it forced ‘the prince’ at the end!!!!!!!!  -i get it. i get the ‘the manga is terrible.’ i see you.  -it wasn’t, completely terrible, but, wow. i get it. 

-okay hold on i still have two side stories before adolescence

-OH ARE YOU KIDDING ME????? ONCE AGAIN I HAVE TO DEAL WITH RUKA  -WAS IT NOT ENOUGH THAT I HAVE ALREADY SUFFERED  -ruka i still hate you. that’s all i have to say on that 

-and black rose arc condensed to thirty pages????  -the way mikage acts towards mamiya is like. blatantly creepy in the anime but i didn’t think it was here???? rude.  -anthy and utena holding hands after it, though....... 

-OKAY, adolescence  -i feel like, i was unduly harsh on the movie...... -mostly because i was reading the youtube comments on the dub before i watched and people were talking about how terrible the dub was (i did not watch the dub)  -and i knew about the car and i was just really thrown by the car. the cars. just. unexpected  -but if the manga speedruns in a bad way the movie speedruns in a way that not only hit the plot elements but picked up a lot of the thematic elements as well!!  -i mean every arc was touched upon in some way! even the black rose arc! -which haunts me, regularly.  -also i am forever going to be thinking about the fwwm parallel like damn  -it really was a good time....... -oh! this in particular was why i was a little concerned about missing anything in thinking about the manga   -like...is this a bad character choice in good writing, or is this a bad character choice in bad writing? sometimes i’m not always great at that 

-anyway.  -the manga was really mostly the same except somehow touga was more uncomfortable, there were no cars, and utena and touga had sex uggg  -god i SWEAR when i was flipping through last week i saw a car though. i swear???? i thought i did?????  -guess i didn’t!! 

-touga: as long as you keep me there in your heart, i can continue to exist like this. i can stay at this school for all eternity.  me: The Grief™ vs ohtori academy doing its thing vs I HATE THIS AAAAAAAAA 

-anthy, to akio: be gone! you’re only in my mind! me: oh that’s a powerful statement though. re: like, how akio keeps anthy 

-what i DID really really love was the little scene at the end with anthy and utena out of ohtori and older in a planetarium theater after everything and being cute on a date (with chu-chu!) and that that’s how it ends (even if utena was still thinking about touga) with them holding hands walking out............... -the softness!!!! 💖💖 

[ccsthemovie2]

trick or treat 2021 letter

DEAR MY KIND AND HARDWORKING GIFTER,

hi there my ao3 is zagspect and thanks in advance for making me a piece of fic or art in this fun little exchange! heres some food for thought to munch on.

i loooove slice of life, character moments, outsider povs that make things we’re used to in canon seem absurd or funny or weird or scary, humor, horror-in-fluff’s-clothing, sweetness-found-in-horror, and also just plain sweetness. feel free to get weird or experimental with your writing if you think the moment calls for it :3 im not really requesting anything sexy-nsfw in this exchange so pls keep things down to a nice pg13 (high-rated gore for higurashi work is an exception, lol, like, it’s when they cry. that’s just part of the deal.)

🌸✨

cardcaptor sakura (trick or treat!)

clear card manga spoilers are fine with me! manga and anime canon are both fine, and mashing them up is cool too. no aus past that though, please!

clow reed

the big man himself! scare me with his his manipulative tendencies, his eternal pushpull fear of both being eternally relied on and being no longer needed, the way he treats other people, especially people who love him. (yue! the madoushi! i am into both of these being unrequited romantically on his end, but he’s not gonna just gonna tell them that, you think he’s straightforward like that?) what’s daily life like in the clowse? creating a new card, what’s that like? does everybody get along with the normal, non magic neighbors? 

yelan li

what’s up with her??? what’s her relationship with her children like, what are the responsibilities of a magician family’s head, how weird is it that clow is kind of back all of a sudden, what’s her thoughts on sakura? fleshing out a minor character is always fun :]

eriol & li

okay, so, we get to the end of the original series. syaoran returns to hong kong. ????????. syaoran is in cahoots with eriol to (vaguely alluding to cc spoilers in case you haven’t caught up in the manga), do some pretty serious magic behind sakura’s back.

so, like... what went down in the ?????

kero & sakura & yue 

they’re FAMBILYYYYY. magic found family i love them so much. show me the depths of their care for her, and hers for them, the way there’s absolutely some ice to break with yue but when he gets loyal he will DIE for you, the way sakura can mend the rift between kero and yue, the way the two of them are balancing this wonderful openness and equality with oh yeah, she’s eleven, we kind of said some seriously dark stuff in the haze of sleepover talk didn’t we? 

ruby & spinel & eriol 

pre-canon or mid-canon or post-canon! what’s the dynamic between them, a quiet night in, a day out telling people that you’re connected by whatever lie you find funniest. going to tomoeda and having to pretend youre a kid, a teen, and a cat, but goddd you could all go for an elegant and adult glass of wine right now (especially the cat). what horrors are lurking in that house from the clow era that no one cares to address? like emotionally and also because it’s a magic wizard house with magic stuff in it. 

touya/yukito/yue 

i am here for any and all angles of this ship- all together, your touyukis, your yuetouyas, your yuekitos if you wanna get in on a rarely seen angle! (but pls have touya and/or yukito be 18+ at a time where yue shows interest in them). i wanna see the way they interact! how they deal with, you know, the everything! pre-relationship pining, going on a date, touya and yukito in college wondering if they’ll end up having different majors, different paths for the first time. yukito seeing yue on video for the first time (OH NO HES HOT), yukito and yue figuring out internal boundaries, etc etc etc.  

naoko and touya 

the girl who loves ghosts and the guy who sees (or, used to see), ghosts! does she follow him to one of his haunts (pun intended)? does he have to go to her for ghost sensing advice now that he’s a regular old human? does he have to save her from a ghost that means her harm? how excited is she to tell sakura about the COOL GHOST I MET WITH YOUR BROTHER OMG U DIDNT TELL ME HE LIKES GHOSTS??? and how much does sakura wanna sink into the ground lololol

🌹⚔️

revolutionary girl utena (trick or treat!)

ohh, what a place of scary happenings! tell me a fairytale, even if it’s not such a good idea. pre, mid, postcanon, im fine with it all. feel free to weave a web with easter egg references to any other media you feel is right for the moment- utena is all about Genre and Stories!

shadow girls 

i love them i love their whole everything. i wanna see a play, i wanna see them interact with other characters! what if they do a play AS the other characters, ooooh.

anthy/utena 

THE GIRLS WHO INVENTED LOVE THEMSELVES. ive read a thousand stories of them finding each other and it never gets old. id love to read about their life post-ohtori, especially the not-so-happily-ever-after parts- the old wounds reopening, the fights, and how they work through it, wont lose each other ever again. 

saionji/touga

what’s spookier than toxic masculinity? both of them miserably stuck, saionji obsessed with touga, touga believing anyone who believes in friendship is a fool. bro we are taking shirtless pictures among 500 potted cacti....why does my heart hurt..... oh shit its the cactus i rolled onto it ow ow

nanami

nanami being nanami! she’s got no clue how to act ever, she’s desperate, she’s trying SO HARD. i’d love to see a nanami finally getting out of there, too. leaving home with nothing but the clothes on her back, diamonds in her necklace, and a wheeled suitcase of raw eggs.... (crunch crunch crunch)

🎲🗓

higurashi when they cry (trick or treat!)

i’m a gou/sotsu enjoyer and gonna prompt about that a lot but original flavor is, of course, great too. pls dont go too heavy on info outside the main 8+saikoroshi+gou/sotsu? i haven’t read those. ive read umineko+ciconia though so references there are fine :3

rena/mion/keiichi

college days! getting together, crushing on each other, poly relationship figuringouts? dates that are just club meetings with kissing and all the ridiculousness of that.

satoko/rika

gou/sotsu era TOXIC LESBIAN EPIC MOMENTS!!!!!! obsession and desperation and satoko putting all her emotional eggs in rika’s basket no matter how angry she is with her, rika’s love for satoko across 100 years and how that all crumbles (to satoko) in the face of rika’s Cool School. rika wanting satoko to go to school with her so so so bad. deep pain and misunderstandings and acting badly (like, murder badly), and then, we hope, atonement and something new beginning? i love character moments where someones so obsessively in love it feels like its eating them up inside.

rena & satoko

look, rena’s smart and really pays attention to how people feel and i think, before or after satoko becomes a looper but especially after, she would make an attempt to have a heart to heart with satoko. and satoko, as a looper, will politely brush her off, will go you dont know me you can’t affect me. youre just a chess piece. when i get to the miracle world where rika loves me, ill listen to you. this you is here to die, or to kill. 

eua

oh eua is just using satoko up like a bar of soap and it takes satoko way, way too long to realize. evil girltalk/crush advice from the witchmom perhaps?

shion

meakashi made me LOVE her. internal shion moments, perhaps? shion being an empath (decides what ppl are thinking and instantly believes it)? shion in gou-era wanting to talk to satoko about st. lucia’s, but she never shows up to dinner?

okay i think that’s all for now!!! thanks and i hope you have fun!!!

[iztarshi]

The Boy Princess

An analysis of Saionji that Saionji himself would hate. Collected into one post at the request of an anon.

Once upon a time all the girls of the world were princesses. But what does that mean?

Princesses are saved by princes. Princesses are cherished, not for any particular qualities they have, but by their nature1. A princess’ suffering is never met with indifference and they’re allowed to want someone else to solve their problems. They’re allowed to be passive and dependent, but not allowed to stop being those things. And they are devoted to their prince.

Once upon a time Saionji had a friend he thought the world of. Touga was stronger, smarter, braver, always ahead of him in some indefineable way, and none of this was a reason to feel anything but glad that Touga had singled him out for attention. Then, one stormy night, he was suddenly faced with the awareness of fear and despair, with things people might need saving from, things that could make a child younger than him want to die. Also, with the awareness that Touga had already known, that he could face these things without fear2.

Saionji’s distress, though, doesn’t matter. Touga declares himself an ally to all girls, but his best friend calling out for him to stop doesn’t affect him. It’s with the logic of a child in the throes of hero worship that Saionji concludes that Touga had something eternal to show and showed it to a strange girl rather than him. He’s not wrong, though, to think that Touga wants to save, specifically, girls.

Before that Saionji trusted Touga enough that Touga being stronger and more driven didn’t matter. If Touga accidentally hurt him he would bandage him too. Touga might keep them out late, but he’d be the one to get them home3.

Afterwards, he loses that trust. Whatever Touga gains by being stronger will not be shared with Saionji. Saionji cannot be weak and still be worth something.

As a boy, if he wants to matter to Touga, he has to be his equal.

Saionji’s career as a duelist is ignominious from start to finish. He’s trying to be a stoic warrior type4, which – since he’s a very emotional person – results in vaccillating between anger and vicious glee.

Being equal to Touga is now necessary to even be safe around him. Saionji isn’t, so he isn’t, and even his scrambling to gain equality has become something for Touga to use against him. The first time we see them alone together Saionji whips a sword at Touga’s face and Touga doesn’t even flinch. No matter how often Saionji takes his frustration with Touga out on others, Touga’s the one person he would never willingly hurt, and Touga knows it.

The person Saionji mostly hurts is Anthy, who he’s convinced himself that he loves. She’s everything he thinks he ought to want, and Touga wants her enough to duel for her which makes her irresistible. He tries to convince himself she loves him, too, but never quite manages to forget she’s only with him because he owns her.

Saionji’s duels are “friendship” and “choice” in opposition to Touga’s duels of “self” and “conviction”. The qualities he’s trying to act on, though, are Touga’s not his own. The result is that he doesn’t successfully show any. He craves emotional connection but is, for good reason, widely disliked. Yet his sense of who he is alone is muddled at best. He stubbornly sticks to the duels but has no plan for how to accomplish things within them and winds up manipulated by anyone who offers him an opportunity – whether it’s dubious letters or Mikage bargaining for Wakaba’s hairclip.

Saionji’s final duel isn’t the conclusion of his character arc, but his lowest point. In an arc where the duels are based around relationships he enters the arena alone and “his” duel is really Utena and Anthy’s5.

Touga talks him into the duel, a role which will later be the bride’s, but leaves him to fight it alone6. As the only one who doesn’t have his sword, Saionji’s heart is quite literally not in the duel.

Saionji enters the last duel as a lone warrior who lets nothing stand in his way, especially such petty considerations as decency or feelings, and is promptly flattened by the developing relationship between Utena and Anthy.

Finally Saionji has failed hard enough for it to stick. He accepts that he’s done. He won’t be Touga’s equal, he won’t win Anthy, he won’t gain eternity. But what will he do?

The woods in a fairy tale are always a liminal place. Even more so woods where an unwanted "child" has been abandoned. So it's fitting that Nanami stumbles across Saionji in a state of transition from duelist to outsider.

In a series where clothing and gender presentation are important, Saionji has decided to do some cooking in a frilly apron7. There's even a lacey table cloth under his hot plate. A lot of anger seems to have been shed with the role of duelist and, even though Nanami hits him, he seems mostly confused and worried about her. He even offers to cook her an egg.

While he keeps the slightly ambiguous presentation for camping out where he doesn't expect to be seen, Saionji does start taking on a role similar to Utena's early one as Touga draws him back into the duels. Utena never cared about the power to revolutionise the world. While it's not entirely that straightforward, she's been fighting for Anthy. As a result she's often been snarky as hell about it, able to see through some of the bullshit but not avoid it completely. A female prince, and therefore anomalous to Ohtori's systems, but still a prince, and therefore part of them.

Touga and Saionji also can't move outside Ohtori's systems. They meet on the student council balcony to discuss Touga's upcoming duel and letters from Ends of the World. Touga provides an ersatz car ride with his motorbike, following the pattern of the other duels deliberately. But, like Utena, Saionji now has enough distance to question the system even as he participates, and he's here solely for Touga's sake.

Like the other brides, Saionji is there to delve into his duelist's feelings and motivations, but he's not doing it to tempt or manipulate8. Touga needs to understand his own motivation if he's going to be effective -- it's the less metaphorical counterpart to pulling his sword. And they manage to leave Akio out of the process.

Touga takes Saionji more seriously in this role than he ever did as a rival. Feelings, especially his own feelings, are not Touga's area of expertise. He needs a bride by the nature of the duels and he needs a friend because he's in over his head. Saionji, for his part, seems content with being needed rather than being equal. In a way it's what he's always wanted.

Saionji drawing Touga's sword is animated with a real tenderness that both echoes Anthy drawing Utena's and contrasts Saionji drawing Anthy's, where his expression was angry and his focus on his opponent. It's fitting, in a way, that the pair that comes closest to what Utena and Anthy have is the other same sex couple9.

Saionji makes a good princess in the same way Utena makes a good prince -- although, unlike her, he'd certainly object if you told him that's what the role was. He's comfortable in it and it brings out mostly good things in him, letting him be insightful and supportive. It's a bad role in itself, though. Saionji doesn't need to fight for power over others, but he shouldn't let himself be completely passive and dependant, or rely on other people's goals to give him purpose.

Later, between Utena's victory over them and her final duel, we see Touga riding a bike across the balcony with Saionji on the back. Saionji seems more content with this than Touga, totally relaxed while Touga struggles to move forward providing motive force for them both. There's not much Saionji can do, though, even if he wanted to. Touga's bike has never been a tandem.

Maybe they should get one.

1I just pictured Dios on tumblr telling all the girls of the world they’re valid.

2Touga’s abuse backstory does a lot to explain his unchildlike reaction here. But even without that, Touga canonically shows less emotion when distressed until he dissociates altogether. He’s almost certainly more affected than Saionji thinks.

3Who drives is very important in Utena, and it’s Touga’s bike. Nanami has a picture of herself perched on the back, too.

4Only Utena and Touga frame themselves as aspiring princes. Saionji’s gender essentialism has a more Japanese flavour.

5Which is why Virtual Star Embryology becomes the new ending theme.

6And then complains about everything he did to be Saionji’s friend while in bed with Akio. Jerk.

7He's still wearing his student council uniform underneath, though, so he hasn't totally moved on yet.

8Although he probably gets some satisfaction out of brutal honesty.

9I wonder if this explains Ruka, since Juri and Shiori would have been another same sex couple either less effective or too early in the sequence.

[aroanthy]

i think what gets me the most about 'nobody else will do. it has to be you' is that touga does say this to nanami, but it's insincere(?)/laced with reluctance/discomfort/resentment. like. 'it has to be you', in the car, fighting the duel, wielding your own heart in your hands. touga's very aware of what a sister should be to her brother in ohtori, and he's willing to make that happen because i think touga's willing to do anything if he believes it'll get him what he wants. there's no excess of blood that can be spilt to him. spilling it in the first place is a necessity of living (and there is a degree of truth to this re: the vulnerability of sincere connection, but touga. is profoundly traumatised. and has adopted this worldview to rationalise his experiences and not buckle under the weight of them (it doesnt work very well)). touga says 'nobody else will do. it has to be you' because he thinks that's what nanami needs to hear, but he misses the most important part, is physically incapable of fulfilling it: 'as long as you can feel sure those words were sincere, you can live through anything, no matter how painful.'

nanami understands, if not wholly then certainly in a way that matters, what she is to her brother. she knows that he doesn't believe that no one else will do, or that he'd rather it could be someone else, or something else equivocal about these statements. more importantly, she pokes holes in her own desires. it doesn't have to be anyone. it's all an artifice. she can live not hearing those words because she hasn't all this time, and she's living, isn't she? she wants to be living. god fucking damnit, she wants to be living despite it all, despite being born as a stain upon her family!! 'nobody else will do. it has to be you' becomes violent, and in that nanami sees a fundamental truth, and something ignites within her that makes her want to break out against everything she's ever believed and valued, even as she still clings to those things. the grief and pain and betrayal. i still love you but i don't intend to see you anymore. etc etc etc. crazy about these kids fr fr fr

[transmascutena]

okay i actually have a lot to say about the illusion of freedom at ohtori academy. and the illusion of choice (the illusion of consent) as well. akio may be right in that the actual written rules of the academy are pretty open, but in reality that matters much less than the unwritten rules of a patriarchal society (which ohtori is a microcosm of.) utena may be able to find loopholes or exceptions in the academy rulebooks that allow her to present masculine, but she is still vulnerable to the expectations of "normalcy," as seen when she wears her girl's uniform, as well as to akio's grooming of her. this surface level independence the school/akio offers actually makes her more vulnerable, because it makes her believe she's free, even in situations where she isn't. and that's what really makes grooming so insidious. it's making the victim feel complicit in their own abuse. we see it in the way utena thinks about her assault after the fact: "i never thought we would end up doing what we did." she blames herself not just as much but more than she blames akio for it.

it's like this: utena thinks everything akio does to her is of her own choice -> she knows something is wrong, and because she trusts akio she can only conclude that that something is her own fault -> she blames herself for sleeping with an engaged man/her best friend's brother -> she is too ashamed to ever tell anybody about it (not helped by akio making sure he's the only adult she trusts, in part by defending her indepence in front of the guidance councelor and vice principal) -> nobody will ever know what akio did and he can continue to do it with no consequences. he says it himself in that very episode (even if he is talking about something slightly different, but which is ultimately a metaphor for the same thing):

[image description: a screencap from revolutionary girl utena. akio is on the phone in his car, saying "yes, well, it'll work out as long as no one catches me. /end id]

and then there's touga. touga is in a unique position and he knows it. he is the student council president and thus has more power and knowledge than everyone else (he thinks). unlike utena, he knows how terrible akio is. he knows he's end of the world before anyone else, and probably knows what he does to anthy as well, if touga's emulation of him and treatment of nanami is any indication. touga knows akio is using him (he knows what it's like to be used in that way) but he thinks he's using akio as well. he knows the relationship is bad and wrong, but he's still under the illusion that it is an equal or mutual one (or close to it, at least) when really akio has all the power.

and they both look at anthy in her birdcage and recognize that they are more free than her, which must mean they're truly free, when really they're all trapped by the same system and abused by the same man.

akio ohtori being a fucking liar compilation

[katherine-rambles]

Since some of my friends are fiiiinaallly watching RGU, spoilers under the cut re: the last few episodes and Anthy. If you’re on mobile, just, uh, scroll really fast I guess? I don’t know why cuts don’t work on mobile...

Is..... is Ohtori.... Anthy’s grave...? 

The kofun burial mound, the coffin, Akio’s determination to try again and again... The swords........ 

Did Dios ‘sacrifice’ himself in order to keep Anthy ‘alive’...? 

Okay okay okay. So two paths to go down here: a metaphoric death (1) and a literal death (2). 

1 - metaphoric death

Looking around at the internet, I’d say other folks have this side covered pretty well; I wanna get to the other one because I have Ideas about that

2 - literal death

In this scenario, we’ve got the archetypes as having some sort of... power over the metanarrative, right? But not complete power, because their power is the belief of those who buy into the narrative. Anthy takes the brunt of the anger for allowing the Prince to escape his obligations to ‘the people’, because those obligations were going to kill him. That anger turns into Anthy being literally, actually run through with lots of implements that kill her. 

But the Prince, newly liberated from his obligations, has a lot of power that he’s now not really using. He can’t save Anthy-- he was too late for that. But he can preserve Anthy. Keep her alive. Turn what would normally be a painful but brief moment into... an eternity. Dios’s powers to change the world are used to stop the world from continuing to happen. To halt time and physics themselves. To stop Anthy from bleeding out. She’s not doing great, but at least she’s not dead. That counts for something, right? Here is where I think Dios turns into Akio; change becoming stagnation. 

Well, they both realize this is a terrible situation. Akio can’t leave Anthy, because then she’ll die. And visa versa. Without the Witch to blame for the Prince’s absence, Akio has no protections from the obligations that gave him the power to change the world in the first place. And without the Prince as a protagonist, the Witch isn’t a credible threat, she loses the Prince’s heartsword: then she loses the power, since it all runs on belief. They’re trapped. Even if Akio lets Anthy die, then he’ll probably die later, trying to fulfill the obligations put upon the Prince. Because a Prince that got lost is still A Prince. It isn’t whether or not Akio wants to be a prince; it’s about what people will demand of him no matter how he chooses to act. If people know that the Prince is free, they expect the Prince to serve them. 

(There’s also a bunch of corollaries here: why Ohtori seems so removed from seasons and time in general can be explained if it’s all tied to Anthy’s literal moment of death. Ohtori academy is both the future where Anthy didn’t die [the academy] and the future where she did [the kofūn]-- and as a princess, she’s entitled to some sweet burial digs, I guess. This also goes some way to explaining the campus’s labyrinthine nature; it’s a superposition of states that are probably always in flux.)

So... they know heartswords are key to this mess. It’s the heartswords that impale Anthy-- perhaps not in the most literal sense, but in the sense that the weapons, insults, & degradations were intentionally meant to cause her harm. Anthy originally hid Dios’s heartsword/obligations/powers within herself; this is the Witch “trapping” the Prince. 

They’re looking for power to free themselves. To do so, they must open the Rose Gate-- the key to this situation is nabbing Anthy from the coffin (the potential future that awaits if time is allowed to continue properly) before the heart/hate-swords can fully kill Anthy. The final Duel, then, is a physical portal to a moment stuck in time: the moment of Anthy’s dying. Anthy can’t do it; she’s being stabbed to death. Akio can try, but his power is trapped with Anthy; so he needs someone else’s power. 

And thus the duels. Take a promising bunch, mold their lives to maximize their motivation, pit them against each other: whoever comes out on top must be the strongest. Take that sword, attempt to break Anthy free. Repeat ad nauseum until something works. 

Where Utena comes in, what she shakes up, is her willingness to free Anthy no matter the personal cost to herself. Anthy has just LITERALLY backstabbed Utena. In Anthy’s mind, there’s no possible reason that Utena could want to continue, now that Utena’s seen the ‘true’ Anthy. Up until this point, the only person who has seen and accepted that side of her has been Akio.

So now we have two people who have seen just about everything Anthy thinks is true of herself. Akio has used that emotional leverage as free reign to be Awful. Anthy, I’m sure, struggles with her pain as much as she struggles with the belief she deserves it, which Akio is able to leverage into his comfy life. He, is actually just kinda fine going with the status quo: he’s not the one dying for eternity. And hey, this gig’s not half bad. Utena wants to be his princess? Sweet. No skin off his back. He’ll tire of Utena just like he tired of Kanae, I’m sure, and then Utena would just be another pawn in the next round of duelists. As long as the swords don’t work to open the Rose Gate, Akio can honestly say that he’s trying, while still actually never succeeding. Maybe he is actually trying, or maybe the duels are no longer anything but an amusement to pass the time. It doesn’t really matter: it’s gone on for so long that they’re all talking about Eternity, something Eternal, how to achieve Eternal Things. (And implied, for Anthy, is eternal pain/death.) 

Utena is a pretty powerful gal, but it isn’t her power that changes things. (Her heartsword does break, after all.) No: it’s her belief in Anthy; her deep-seated conviction that Anthy shouldn’t be in so much pain. Utena is willing to sacrifice herself if it would help out her friend. She doesn’t care that she's been hurt, she doesn’t care that she may die, she doesn’t care that Anthy wants her to go back to safety. She believes Anthy is worth saving. 

And it’s that, I think, that finally motivates Anthy into breaking the cycle. Dios cared about Anthy, sure; but he didn’t do anything when she put herself in the line of fire. He didn’t jump to save her as he did to save the princesses-- because to a prince, a potential marriage match is more important than a sister. Not necessarily (originally) a personal fault; it’s part of the Narrative-- his power derives from that idealized vision of a prince saving princesses. He never later decided to try diverting the hateswords by fessing up to the fact that he’d been living the high life by faking his princely death. 

Anthy breaks the cycle by walking away. Instead of protecting Akio, as she’s been doing all this time, she gives him back what she took in trying to save him. Well-- insofar as she ever actually took anything. Instead of standing in front of the barn, she walks away, to let Akio deal with his own problems. 

Utena convinced Anthy that Anthy herself is worth saving, too. That Dios’s self-inflicted damage was the same as Anthy’s curse: doing for others what they can (or should) figure out for themselves. I mean-- if those people could kill a Witch, why couldn’t they protect their own princesses? For that matter, why are the princesses so incapable of protecting themselves? That seems like something royalty should generally learn how to do. 

Now, in this setup, that leaves the last moments of the final duel a little in the lurch. If Anthy stops the cycle by getting out of the way, and Utena inspires her to do so by getting in the way... then what? Well, I think that means that there’s no target for the heartswords. I mean, yes, Utena puts herself in the line of fire; but that line of fire exists because of Anthy’s original decision to ‘save’ Dios. When Anthy decides to stop doing that, there becomes no swords that were ever aimed at her. The universe settles into a shape that allows for the past, but it’s now the present in which Anthy is alive, Ohtori never was a kofūn and is only a normal academy, and Utena's stay at Ohtori becomes fuzzy to everyone involved because it’s the crux of a space-time paradox. But importantly, in this reading, it means Utena didn’t have to save Anthy in the ‘resettled’ past. So the universe makes sense of this, essentially, by diffusing Utena’s impact, and Utena is off doing what Utena would’ve been doing had she not been in the duels. 

(A generous continuation from there would have Utena already having made friends with Anthy; and at least the official epilogue art, there’s some indication that that may have been the case. An angsty epilogue would have Utena never know nor recall Anthy’s lived past. A cruel epilogue would be something akin to Donna���s departure from Doctor Who, wherein Utena’s recovered memories destabilizes the universe and would lead to her death. I think, in this reading, it’s unreasonable to assume Anthy couldn’t track Utena down fairly easily, though.)

Anyway, now I want to write a lot of fic that I know I have no patience to write. C’est la vie.