#don't know why i'm going on this rant. oh well

[margindoodles2407]

we can talk about my views on shipping later but i think there is a trope i've pioneered

and it's almost like forbidden love but. not quite

and it's called "i love you so much and so deeply but the circumstances of our lives have aligned such that we are not supposed to be together, so i am going to willingly sacrifice being in a romantic relationship with you as the ultimate expression of my love and respect for you"

[gophergal]

the solution to the "are you normal about X people who turn out to be Y" debate is stop fucking assuming things about people

You wanna know what pronouns to use for an individual? Ask them.

As a general rule, don't make jokes about the identity you perceive of someone. Know your audience

How is that hard? Why do we all think ourselves such experts on the lives of other people??????

[cosmogyros]

.

[quirkle2]

not saying i'd do this cuz im very very hesitant but . people have patreons for like,, wips n stuff right?? like people pay to see ur work early or whatever? would any of y'all be at all interested

[stinkywormynoob]

This series has no future, WUM is never getting its online fixed, even the newest entries are ditched, Worms Armageddon is a milking cow. I mean, selling a game from 1999 for 60+ BUCKS. WHAT THE FUCK.

[suiana]

yandere! golden boy who is your loving boyfriend and... surprisingly loves listening to you talk about your interests! yes darling, talk about your games and novels and silly plushies! he loves seeing how interested you can get about things you're passionate about and it just makes him feel so warm on the inside.

you might even go as far to say he ENCOURAGES your interests. buying you plushies, taking you to exhibitions/places you want... you don't even have to ask, just one look with your eyes and he's taking out his card. yeah, it doesn't matter if you have an unhealthy attachment to that fat cat pusheen or whatever. you seem to really like it so he's buying that 400 dollar plushie for you.

on the same note... he can't help but get jealous when you're gushing over attractive fictional characters. SPECIFICALLY that ONE dude that you seem to have EVERYWHERE. on the wall, on your phone cover, lock screen, profile picture, fuck, even on your bed as a plushie! and all he gets is a meager nickname on his contact?!

"sweetie, must you... really have all these... THINGs of HIM?"

"he's my first husband, you're my second. of course i have merch of him. plus I'm not gonna just throw all these away, i spent big money on these ya know 💀"

he knows it's petty! he knows that it's just a fictional character and that he shouldn't be jealous but dude! you don't even have him in your wallet! it's that freaking guy!

so he does what evey sane boyfriend does and replaces some (not all just some!) of your merchandise with pictures of him and you. how adorable, right?

no.

"bro where is the portrait of my MAN🤬🤬🤬"

"i replaced it with a nice picture of us together darling☺️ look at how cute-"

oh. and you...you just put another photo of that guy again... oh... and you're ranting on reddit/instagram about how he's being mean... you also removed him from your close friends list... oh you... you also decided to kick him off the bed and onto the sofa... oh...

well no biggie! he has lots of patience and he will sneak in his presence into your stuff. he's determined.

"best friend I'm going to need you to cosplay as my favorite character please ☺️"

damn!

why didn't he think of that sooner? if you can't win the normal way, you should do it another way, right? he can just get you to see how much better he is and you'll eventually replace that fictional man for HIM!

...

yeah, that didn't work out as planned. now you're even more in love with that character and you're asking him to cosplay every other day. erm... at least.. your wallpaper is a picture of him cosplaying the character??? he'll take what he can get.

"lol best friend, did you see that video i sent you. it's so stupid."

"for the last time, sweetie. we're dating, call me boyfriend. and which one? I can't watch every single one of the 99+ reels you send me."

"a real best friend would watch them all..."

being with you has singlehandedly changed this man. for the worse or for the better, he doesn't know. but what he does know is that you DON'T know how to dress.

"sweetie, no. you can't just go out in a shirt and shorts! you look like adam sandler!"

"clothes are clothes 🤬"

at least he has a fun time dressing you up. you're like, his cute little rat! his very own personal dress up rat! oh how he wants to just keep you in his pocket and pick out pretty clothes for you, making you look like the cutest thing ever! sure you might take them off and just wear what you want but... at least he's got the photos and the sight of you in a pretty outfit ingrained into the folds of his brain already ☺️ and he'll take every chance he can get to put you into another pretty outfit again. that i assure you.

he... has ALSO found out that you are living on instant noodles, sandwiches, and the occasional takeout. you don't even open the curtains! how can you see in such a dark home? and why are you sleeping until midday?! dear oh dear. you really are a rat, huh?

"darling get up! it's 12 in the afternoon already!"

"i slept at 3 just let me sleep more..."

that simply won't do. he will not be allowing you to lead such a horrid lifestyle! not if he can help it! especially because... well, he's also your boss. from part 1, remember! yeah, you guys didn't break up at the end haha! you were just joking, obviously! not like you'll ever be able to break up. it's in the contract, silly.

"come on, get up. you need to have a healthy lifestyle. I've already gotten my personal chef to cook up a healthy meal for you."

"who's gonna stop me from living like this? you? 😂😂😂"

"yes, me. in our contract, remember? i will be responsible for your health from now till we die."

don't worry. he'll be by your side every step of the way. and hey, who knows? maybe you can even teach him a thing or two about gaming or something else you like! he's open to learning about the things you like.

and he won't even have to worry about you finding another REAL person to like because... well, let's just say you don't even like going out for dinner. we'll keep it at that ☺️

[hanniebaeee]

Clueless: Just friends?

Lee Know x fem!reader

Warnings: language, suggestive content MDNI

Genre: friends with benefits to lovers, fluff

Summary: You and Minho used to be friends with benefits. Until you caught feelings, and you both called it off. But Minho obviously misses you and is miserable even though he doesn't want to admit it. And his brothers have had enough of his moping.

Clueless Masterlist

The arrangement with Minho had been perfect - or at least it had started that way. Opposite apartments on the same floor of your nice apartment building. You’d text each other, and within minutes, someone was at the other’s door. No strings, no drama. Just a lot of heat that left you breathless and a little sore the next day.

Until, of course, you did the one thing you promised yourself you wouldn’t do - you caught feelings.

And naturally, Minho, emotionally stunted and a menace to society, panicked. He started pulling away, making excuses every time you asked if he wanted to come over. The warmth in his teasing dimmed into something guarded.

And it hurt. A lot. His rejection wasn't something you had expected, because no matter what anyone said, he was so soft and sweet to you. But he obviously didn't want a relationship, and you both decided to stop seeing each other.

You missed him. Not just his touch, but everything else too. The way he always brought food over (making excuses about how he had extra), held you tight when you had a hard day and how his cats lived with you more than they did with him. Oh you missed the cats. They were literally your kids - and this dirty divorce had given him full custody of them.

And Minho? He was a mess. Not that he’d admit it.

And Jisung had had about enough of his best friend and his brooding.

---

Jisung: OKAY EVERYONE STOP.

Chan: What's up?

Hyunjin: What did you do?

Jisung: NOTHING. THIS IS ABOUT MINHO.

Seungmin: What did he do?

Jisung: He’s been moping for WEEKS. And I'm sick of it.

Changbin: You sure? That’s just his face.

Jisung: LISTEN. IT’S ABOUT Y/N.

Hyunjin: Ohhhhhh.

Felix: I KNEW IT.

Minho: What the hell is going on?

Jisung: OH LOOK WHO DECIDED TO SHOW UP. Jisung: YOU, SIR, ARE A DRAMA QUEEN.

---

Minho sighed. This was the last thing he needed right now.

---

Minho: I’m not moping.

Felix: Sure. And I’m not Australian.

Hyunjin: Yeah, totally not glaring at your phone at all.

Minho: It’s not about her.

Jeongin: Are you sure you didn't accidentally click her name in your contacts 12 times yesterday?

Chan: What's going on, Min?

Minho: I don't even know what you guys are going on about!

Minho: We were friends. With benefits. Not lovers. She was nice in bed. That’s it.

---

There was complete silence in the chat for a minute before it exploded.

---

Chan: No, Minho. No. No. No.

Seungmin: Okay, first of all, what the actual fuck?

Hyunjin: Bro, you did not just say that.

Jisung: YOU ABSOLUTE FUCKING LOSER.

Changbin: 😡

Jeongin: Hyung, she's an angel, how could you?

Felix: We’re literally trying to save you from yourself.

Minho: Well don't.

---

Minho hated himself. He absolutely hated himself. But he couldn't dwell on the self hate because Jisung just sent a video of Minho pacing his living room like a caged animal, while ranting about you being gone.

---

Hyunjin: Wow. Ok.

Minho: 🙄

Minho: Stop. Just stop.

Chan: Look, you’re obviously miserable. Why not just talk to her?

Seungmin: Yeah, genius. It’s not like she doesn’t live 20 feet away.

Minho: What if she doesn’t feel the same?

Jeongin: I'm sorry, but you’re an idiot.

Hyunjin: Dude. She liked you enough to start this whole thing. You just have to get over your dumb commitment issues.

Changbin: Honestly, just confess. Worst-case scenario, you cry into Dori.

Minho: I hate you all.

Jisung: Hate is a strong word for someone who’s about to sob into his cat.

Minho: Fine. I’ll talk to her.

---

Minho sat on his couch, heart pounding as he stared at your number on his phone. He’d been backed into a corner by his idiot friends, and now there was no escape.

And knowing you, he had a feeling that this was going to be the single most difficult task ever.

With a frustrated groan, he stood and grabbed his hoodie. He was going to do this. Because he loved you so much, and he was miserable without you.

Across the hall, in your apartment, you were getting some work done, sipping on coffee. You heard the doorbell, and when you opened the door, you saw Minho - disheveled, nervous, and yet, as handsome as ever. And your traitorous heart did that stupid thing it always did around him.

“Hey,” he said softly, eyes meeting yours. “Can we talk?”

Minho hadn’t been this nervous in a long time. He stood at your doorstep, heart racing, and palms sweaty, his usual confidence nowhere to be seen.

And he confessed. Nothing dramatics. Just a straightforward, “I love you.”

You'd stared at him as if trying to figure out if he was high. Or had hit his head somewhere. Or if he was simply horny.

But no. Then came his little speech. I know I don't deserve you. I was an asshole (of course he was). I was afraid (as if you weren't). And more than anything - I hurt you. And I hate myself for it. Ok now that you could work with.

But as hard as you tried, sometimes you just couldn't contain that bratty side of you (one that he apparently loved).

You crossed your arms, glaring at him like he’d just run over your dog.

“You can’t just waltz over here, say ‘I love you,’ and expect me to fall into your arms,” you snapped, looking infuriatingly hot with your brows furrowed and your lips pursed in defiance. “You rejected me, Minho. Do you know much that hurt me?”

His stomach twisted.

“I… I wasn’t ready -” he stuttered, looking terrified.

“Yeah, well, now I’m not ready,” you said, taking a step back and slamming the door in his face for dramatic effect.

You leaned against the door, fuming and freaking out all together. Your hands shook so hard as you wrapped your head around the fact that Minho just confessed to you and you slammed the door on his face.

And Minho stood in the hallway, a mix of shock, frustration, and - God help him - arousal bubbling under the surface. You were bratty when you were mad, of course. It made him want to kiss you and throttle you all at once.

---

Minho: She hates me.

Hyunjin: No, she doesn't. She slammed the door on your face didn't she?

Minho: How the hell are you so accurately right?

Jeongin: It's his thing.

Felix: What happened?

Jisung: Wait. Did you confess?

Minho: YES.

Minho: AND SHE SLAMMED THE DOOR IN MY FACE.

Hyunjin: Obviously.

Chan: So she didn’t say no?

Jisung: LMFAO.

Jeongin: She’s mad at you? Yeah, no shit, Sherlock.

Minho: SHE SAID A SIMPLE “I LOVE YOU” WOULDN’T WORK ON HER. WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?!

Seungmin: It means she’s not an idiot.

Changbin: Exactly. You rejected her and took months to realize you’re in love. She deserves a little groveling.

Minho: GROVELING?

Felix: Oh, for sure.

---

He was not groveling. No way. Lee Minho didn't grovel. Hell no.

---

Jisung: Yeah, buddy. You gotta pull out all the stops now. Dinner, flowers, interpretive dance. The works.

Minho: STOP.

Hyunjin: Actually, the dance idea is kinda sexy. Imagine Minho doing a hip roll to apologize.

Felix: STOP IT. I’M WHEEZING.

Minho: CAN YOU ALL BE SERIOUS FOR TWO SECONDS?!

Chan: Look, the point is, you hurt her feelings. You need to show her that you’re serious.

Minho: How?! She's a damn brat. She enjoys torturing me.

Jisung: If she’s a brat, she’s gonna want to see you sweat.

Minho: She frustrates me.

Jisung: So you're sure you're just frustrated and not turned on right now?

---

Damn Jisung.

---

Jeongin: YAHHHH

Felix: You’re INTO IT???

Changbin: My man’s in love AND down bad.

Minho: Please.

Felix: Okay, focus. If groveling isn’t your style, do something you.

Hyunjin: Yeah. Seduce her with your weird cat boy energy or whatever.

Minho: You’re all useless.

Seungmin: Says the man who just admitted to being horny and clueless.

Chan: Minho, she clearly wants you to prove yourself. You’ve got to show her you’re willing to put in effort.

Hyunjin: Write her a song. Serenade her. Cry through it.

Minho: I don’t cry.

Jisung: LIES. I’ve seen you cry at those pet videos.

Minho: JISUNG YOU'RE DEAD.

Minho: What if she never forgives me?

Jeongin: She will. She’s just mad. Just play along.

Hyunjin: He’s right. Drama makes us hotter.

Minho: You're all insane 🙄

Chan: Insane but not wrong. Now, go apologize properly.

---

Minho paced his living room, his mind racing through ideas - romantic dinner? A heartfelt speech? Maybe just tossing himself at your feet and begging?

He needed a plan.

---

Minho: Fine. Give me ideas to make her forgive me.

Jisung: OHOHOHOHOHO.

Felix: Oh, this is gonna be good.

Hyunjin: Okay, everyone, let’s brainstorm.

Changbin: Classic dinner and flowers. Can’t go wrong.

Jisung: No, no. She’s mad. You need to go BIG. Like, dramatic big.

Minho: Like what? Fall to my knees in the rain?

Hyunjin: YES. Bonus points if you sob.

Minho: I’m not doing that.

Seungmin: You’re all useless. Look, Minho, she’s mad because you hurt her. You need to make her feel special. Do something that shows you actually care.

Jisung: STRIPTEASE.

Chan: Jisung.

Felix: WAIT. THAT’S ACTUALLY KIND OF FUNNY.

Hyunjin: Picture this. You show up at her door, music playing, and just start taking things off.

Minho: I want to win her back. Not make her think I'm horny.

Jisung: Coward.

---

Obviously he knew this would happen. He knew it.

---

Chan: Okay, let’s regroup. Minho, what does she like?

Minho: Being mad at me, apparently.

Jeongin: Sounds like she has taste.

Minho: She likes reading. And baking. And…dancing.

Felix: Aha! Bake her something!

Hyunjin: And while it’s baking, do a little dance. Shirtless.

Jisung: OOOH. Combine the ideas. Show up with baked goods and then do the striptease.

Minho: Oh my God.

Seungmin: You could apologize like a normal person, you know.

Felix: Where’s the fun in that?

Jisung: No, no. We need something iconic.

Felix: Okay, serious suggestion: Show her that you actually listened to her. Her favorite food? Or something thoughtful that shows you care about what she likes.

Minho: Like…?

Hyunjin: Cook her favorite meal.

Chan: Or bring her flowers that mean something.

Jisung: Or do the striptease.

Minho: STOP WITH THE STRIPTEASE.

Felix: It’s not a bad idea, you know. Women love confidence.

Minho: I’ll do the cooking idea. But if this backfires, I'm gonna hunt each one of you down and then see what happens.

Jisung: Lies. You’ll be back to cry about it.

---

Minho got to work. He spent hours perfecting your favorite meal, rehearsing his apology in front the mirror, and trying not to think about how much he wanted to kiss you. God, he just wanted to cuddle you and tell you how much his life sucked without you in it.

When he finally knocked on your door, you opened it to find him standing there, holding so many containers of food and looking uncharacteristically nervous.

“Hi,” he said, voice soft. “Can I come in?”

You crossed your arms, and sighed.

"Minho, I really don't have the time-"

"I made your favorite," he said, holding up the containers. "And I will grovel if that's what it takes."

You did love it when he cooked for you.

“This better be good.”

Minho stood in your living room, wringing his hands as you sat on the couch, glaring at him. He set the food on the coffee table and looked at you, his sharp tongue failing him for once.

“I was afraid,” he finally said, voice low.

“Afraid of what? Being happy?” You asked, arching an eyebrow.

Minho winced.

“Yes. No. I mean…God, I don’t know. You’re everything to me, okay? And I was scared I’d ruin it. And then I did ruin it, and now I’m standing here like an idiot, begging you to let me fix it.”

“You… you really mean that?” You asked, your voice softer now, your eyes obviously filling up with tears.

“I’ve been a mess without you. I love you and I’m sorry it took me so long to realize it, but I do. I love you, and I’ll spend as long as it takes proving it to you.” he whispered, and you sighed, standing up and stepping closer to him.

“You’re such a dumbass, you know that?”

“Yeah, I've been told.”

And then he cupped your cheeks with his hands and kissed you. Rough and messy, the tension melting away as your arms wrapped around his waist, pulling him closer.

“You better not mess this up.” you muttered against his lips.

“Not a chance.”

---

Minho: We’re trying the relationship thing.

Felix: OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!

Hyunjin: FINALLY.

Jisung: Thank you 🙏

Changbin: Congrats, lover boy.

Chan: Proud of you, Minho.

Felix: Did she like the food?

Minho: Um, it kinda went cold. She’s heating it up now.

Hyunjin: LMAO.

Jisung: What about the striptease? Did you do it?

Minho: 🙄🙄🙄

Jisung: ANSWER THE QUESTION, COWARD.

Minho: We did strip. So… hehe.

Felix: SIR.

Hyunjin: NOT THE “HEHE.”

Jisung: I CAN’T BREATHE.

Changbin: YOU DOG.

Chan: Minho, for the love of God.

Minho: You asked.

Jisung: My dude really said, “She forgave me, and then we got NAKED.” ICONIC.

Jeongin: Please. I just came here to see if Minho hyung was still single, and now I want to bleach my brain.

Chan: Can we not, for once, be so feral?

Hyunjin: You’re in the wrong chat for that, Christopher.

Jisung: Anyway, so… did you, like, destroy the house or… ?

Minho: I will never speak to any of you again.

Jisung: YOU CAN’T JUST DROP “WE STRIPPED” AND THEN LEAVE.

Felix: It’s called a cliffhanger, Ji. Let the man be mysterious.

Hyunjin: Yeah, mysterious about how whipped he is.

Felix: Totally

Divider: @saradika-graphics

Tags: @moonchild9350 @velvetmoonlght @eastjonowhere @pixie-felix @sailor--sun @chancloud8 @captainchrisstan @hansmic @emilyywhyy @hanadulsetaad

[pseudowho]

Stoic

When Gojo assumes Nanami Kento's lack of PDA for the reader shows a lack of desire for her, a tipsy Kento is quick to correct him.

Warnings: 18+ drabble, Kento goes on a smutty rant

+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+

'A quick drink' after work had soon turned into two, three, four. Shoko took full advantage of the rooftop bar's balcony, smoking and idly chatting; Higuruma and Atsuya gossipped and quipped, snorting into their drinks; Satoru observed Kento and you keenly behind his dark lens; you stood, excusing yourself to the bathroom as Kento gave you a gentle smile.

"I'm sorry," Satoru interrupted loudly when you were gone, his pot boiling over, "I just-- I just don't get it, Nanami." All eyes were on Satoru and Kento now-- Kento, with one thin eyebrow raised in quiet disdain at Satoru, and Satoru, with his elbows planted forward on his knees in challenge.

A few moments of silence. Kento huffed, "Should I be apologising for someth--"

"--you've been together for years," Satoru interrupted, "and I'm just not convinced. She could be-- she could be a coat rack for all the affection you show her, you're supposed to not be able to keep your hands off her--"

"--you want me to grope my fiancée in public, am I correct--"

"--well maybe, anything to show that you love her--"

Kento laughed out loud, deep and humourless, continuing to chuckle into his glass, scoffing to himself; "Love her," he rumbled, swirling his whiskey, amber eyes flickering and carnal in the firelight.

Shoko had turned, smirking, to watch the scene. Atsuya leaned back, scowling, chewing on a toothpick with crossed arms. Hiromi leaned, glimmer-eyed, into the drama, one hand cupping his jaw and the other clasping his wineglass. He picked up the bottle, slowly beginning to pour another glass.

"I don't love her," Kento spat, downing his glass of whiskey in one smooth swallow, hissing and slamming the glass down on the table, "I worship her. I'm obsessed with her."

Satoru was silent, mulish, as Kento continued.

"I would walk through rains of bullets for her," he mused aloud, "I would cut off fingers with blunt knives--"

"Nanami, alright, I'm sorry--"

"Any second I'm not with her," Kento continued, his voice quieter, darker, the group leaning into him, "is a second wasted. I don't know what point there was in the years I spent without her-- probably just there to build me into even a semblance of the man she deserves--"

"--why are we doing this--"

"-- and when I'm not thinking about talking to her, watching her, being near her, holding her, or-- fuck, just having her look at me goes bone-deep...I spend at least eighty-percent of my time thinking about different ways to make her cum--"

Satoru was blushing now, his face in his hands, while the others leaned into Kento's mild breakdown with awe, "--fucking hell Nanami, I didn't mean--"

"I almost died last week, at work," Kento mused, as a laughing Hiromi slid the glass of wine down the table to Kento, which he caught seamlessly, "because I was too busy thinking about how her mouth had felt around my cock the night before, because I was pondering the many applications for my tie, because I was thinking about how incredible she felt underneath me--"

Atsuya and Shoko whispered together, Hiromi now giggling to himself unashamedly; "Oh he's really going for it--" "I know I know, shhh, let him finish--"

"--and I've been sat here with her all evening, resisting the urge to strip her, tie her wrists together and have her ride me until I go fucking blind, all because of social-fucking-propriety, just for some long streak of jizz like you to say I clearly don't love her--"

Satoru had shrunk in on himself now, his soul quietly leaving his body, mortified and put to rights as Kento tsked, swirling his wine before downing that, too. He accepted the bottle Hiromi slid towards him in approval.

"...it really just is rather rude and presumptuous of you, isn't it, Gojo?"

The group sat in stunned silence as you returned, sitting beside Kento and laying a hand on his crossed knees. You felt the bizarre tension; Hiromi unable to conceal a blush as he looked at you, Shoko giving you a knowing smile around her cigarette, Atsuya unable to make eye contact. You smiled uncertainly.

"...what did I miss?"

+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+

Still waters run deep 💀💀💀

[thedollydiaries]

imagine like simon goes into some sort of surgery and has to be put under anesthesia, and when he gets out hes like still high asf on it 💀 and hes being a lil silly goose

okay this is such a cute idea omg, this is 100% based off that tiktok audio where it's like "my wife wouldn't like you touching me like that" "i AM your wife."

thank you so much for the request nonnie, a forehead kiss for you MWAH MWAH

simon 'ghost' riley x reader

wc: 563

warnings: none really, lots and lots of that good ol fluff, mentions of surgery, goofy simon, maybe a little ooc simon (he's high so it's fine)

a/n: i hope this is okay, i'm feeling a bit rusty with my writing but i've finally got back some motivation and energy to do so after the past two months of low energy and bad mental health. if you guys want to know a bit more about it and my mental health (i don't see why anyone would but lmao) let me know, i don't mind making a post about it if you guys want an explanation of some sort or whatever. anywho, sorry this is so short but i hope you still like it!! <3

a/n 2.0: i recently applied for a part time job at a bookstore so y'all pray for me that i get this job because i want it so bad. i am just gonna decide that i WILL get this job, because why wouldn't i?

simon had been out of surgery for just over an hour now, being a soldier you 'd think perhaps he was going under surgery for some kind of wound he had inflicted upon him on the battlefield but no, he was just getting his tonsils removed after a bad bout of tonsillitis ended up with him developing really bad tonsil stones.

so here you were, waiting by his bedside for him to wake up. the doctor and nurses reminded you just as he had gotten out that he may still be a little, well loopy, off of the meds depending on how quickly he woke up. you waited in a chair at his bedside, reading a book when you heard the blankets of the bed rustling just a little.

looking up from your book you see simon starting to wake up and you reach out to grasp his hand, only for him to rip it away from you when his eyes were fully opened.

"uh, si? you okay, hon?" you ask gently, maybe he just wasn't feeling too well after waking up, or perhaps he wasn't wanting physical touch, that happened quite often and you always respected that space he may want when he wanted it.

"don't call me that." simon said, voice hoarse and scratchy from the surgery, he sounded a little angry.

"what?" you questioned, this wasn't like simon, you couldn't understand why he wouldn't want you speaking like this to him.

"i'm taken."

"i know." you replied with a short laugh.

"you should be touching me like that then."

it hit you then, he was woozy from the meds and didn't recognize you. the realization made you laugh a little more. you decided to have a bit of fun with this high version of your boyfriend.

"sorry about that simon. wanna tell me about your partner?"

"oh, (name)? they're amazing, you know they're so pretty. and they're funny too. they always know how to make me feel better, i miss them." simon replies, ranting and raving on and on to you about his partner, about you.

"you love them a lot, don't you?" you ask him with a smile, it felt so nice to hear all these lovely things about yourself, your boyfriend clearly unfiltered by the effects of the anesthesia he was under.

sure he definitely said sweet things to your face, but something about hearing it when he was basically high as shit made your heart pound a little more.

"i love them with my whole heart." simon replies, a goofy little smile on his face.

you can't help but reach out to gently caress his face at those words, body filling up with some much adoration for the soldier in front of you.

"hey! what did i say about touching me. i have a partner!" simon scolds, trying to dodge your touch.

"simon, love... i am your partner. it's me, (name)." you reply with a laugh.

simon takes a good long look at you when you tell him this, he stares at you, looks you up and down before letting out a soft and quiet "oh."

you begin to hear the beeping of his heart rate monitor speed up, his cheeks turning slightly pink as he stares up at you.

you couldn't help but laugh a little more at this. what a sweet idiot. your sweet idiot.

[landoughnut]

Mr. Darcy Who? - LN4

masterlist - request

pairing: lando norris x fem!reader

summary: you're a book influencer dating lando, and when interviewed, he admits he's gotten into reading because of you (requested)

w/c & a/n: smau | thank you for the request! I didn't know if you wanted an smau or not so I picked, I'm sorry if you wanted written!

yourusername

liked by lando, mclaren, alexandrasaintmleux, lilyzneimer, and 3,192,487 others yourusername new rec video dropping soon! you all asked for summer recs, so you all shall receive summer recs 🌸

view all comments

lando my precious beautiful girl who I love so dearly 🥰 ♥︎ by author

yourusername why are you saying that like you did something wrong...

lando yourusername I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING??? jeez a guy can't love his girlfriend these days without being blamed for something 🙄 ♥︎ by author

lando when you finish annotating that book can I have it pretty please with two and a half cherries on top 🥺 ♥︎ by author

yourusername why only two and a half

lando yourusername because im eating half of the third, duh 😋

oscarpiastri lando another book? you called me crying at the ending of iron flame

yourusername lando EXCUSE ME?? YOU CALL OSCAR INSTEAD OF ME?? ARE YOU JOKINGGGGGGG

lando yourusername IM SORRY MY SWEET LOVE I WAS EMBARRASSED

yourusername lando oh I'll show you embarrassed. if you dare to rant to someone other than ME about MY books that you stole, I'm telling everyone what book you wanted to buy

lando yourusername dully noted 😅 I'll make it up to you tonight ♥︎ by author

mclaren lando here we go again...

user1 do my eyes deceive me?? lando... reading????

yourusername I'm turning him into a book boyfriend, you're welcome ladies 🤗

user2 yourusername I'm jealous 😪

lando yourusername what even is a book boyfriend... I don't know what a morally gray love interest is but apparently I am one

yourusername lando details aren't necessary love, but yes you are 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨

user3 lando a book boyfriend is the male love interest that girls in the book community all obsess over together

lando yourusername YOU HAVE OTHER BOYFRIENDS????

yourusername lando oh my gosh THEY ARE FICTIONAL

yourusername user3 WHYYYY would you tell him that now he's never going to stop bothering me

alexandrasaintmleux wow I need to learn how to be you asap ♥︎ by author

yourusername girly pop I'm trying to be YOU

yourusername also look at my baby fluffykins is he adorable

user4 almost as cute at you 😉 ♥︎ by author

lando user4 bye.

user5 did I miss something? since when does LANDO read?

user6 when they started dating a little over a year ago! she has a YouTube channel about books and met him at an event and started dating, then I guess he just picked it up from stealing her books

lilyzneimer we should go to barnes together! ♥︎ by author

yourusername omg yes pleaseee 🥹 I'll plan it

lilyzneimer yourusername yayy! 🤭

skysportsf1

liked by lando, yourusername, f1, mclaren, oscarpiastri and 1,284,536 others skysportsf1 lando finally speaks about how he's always so calm before racing! here's the secret (or not anymore): he said he either reads one of yourusernames annotated books or facetimes her so she can read to him 📖

view all comments

user6 AWWWWWW THAT'S SO CUTE 🥹

user7 damn I'm feeling extra single now...

yourusername my baby looks so handsome omg

lando I love you.

yourusername I love you most 😚

user8 the way he said "her voice is more calming than anything I could ask for" I'm gonna cry

user10 okay but what kinda books is he reading

yourusername well I read every genre so he usually just picks whatever book with a cover that sticks out to him, right now he's reading the republic by plato

user11 yourusername DANGGG I didn't know he new sophistication like that

yourusername user11 believe it or not but he actually got into philosophy recently!

user12 HELLO? why is no one talking about how he immediately smiles when the interviewer - or anyone for that matter - mentions her

user13 I KNOWW its adorable look at him blushinggg 🥹

user14 she's living the life bro, dating an f1 driver and having my dream career

lando erm actually 🤓 I'm living the life cause I get to wake up next to her every morning

user14 lando so you want me to go sleep on the highway

yourusername lando AWHHH ILY SO SO MUCH COME KISS ME

lando yourusername 🏃🏃

maxverstappen1 you two are disgusting

lando maxverstappen1 just say you're jealous and move on

yourusername the amount of times he's fallen asleep on me reading to him a few hours before the race starts is crazy

user15 I swear he feels so safe with her

lando baby don't rat me out 😭

yourusername lando but I love when you do because then I get to secretly braid your hair 😊

lando yourusername believe it or not but I'm usually half awake and just pretend to sleep cause its so relaxing

yourusername lando of course you do 🙄 just ask me next time

user16 if they’re not married by the next season I’m suing.

carlossainz55 why are you always giggling when you talk about her

lando excuse me for being in a happy and healthy relationship

lando

liked by yourusername, f1, carlossainz55, maxfewtrell, and 2,491,638 others lando thank you my love for introducting me to books, they relax me almost as much as making out with you 🤗

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yourusername baby I love you but the last part really wasn't necessary 😭 ♥︎ by author

mclaren agreed

lando but its true 🥺

charles_leclerc I agree with your girlfriend tmi 🤢

lando charles_leclerc okay well no one asked you 😒

f1 best couple award goes to: ♥︎ by author

carlossainz55 I remember the days when you had a crush on her and was too nervous to start a conversation 😂 poor guy would stutter everytime she looked at him from across the room

lando I dont know what you are talking about. don't believe him everyone he's lying.

maxverstappen1 lando he's not 🙂 and I think I also remember you buying your own pride and prejudice cause you binge watched all her videos and knew it was her favorite book

lando .... well fuck me then I guess it's spill all of lando's secrets day 😄

yourusername lando ARE THEY TELLING THE TRUTH??? 🥹

lando yourusername I guess....... maybe.....

yourusername lando YOU ARE SO CUTE I CAN'T 🥹

user17 lando is setting the standards high dang

pierregasly user17 fr he's making me look bad

user18 what book did you read before the Imola gp

lando wuthering heights (yourusername's pick)

lando though tbh I wasn't paying attention for most of it cause she was playing with my hair and I couldn't keep my eyes open

user19 I PRAY THIS LOVE FINDS ME UGHHH

oscarpiastri so like no one wants to hear about to two lip locking

lando so like too bad 😝

maxfewtrell tell her to come onto the next stream I miss my bestie

yourusername MISS YOU MORE KING

lando oh so SHE'S you're best friend now?? what am I???

maxfewtrell lando my best friends boyfriend

lando maxfewtell I'll block you bitch

user20 NO ONE IS TALKING ABOUT HER DRESS BRO I'M OBSESSED PLEASE DROP THE LINK

lando my extremely talented love made it herself actually‼️ she looks beautiful in it doesn't she

user21 lando so she really is just perfect

lando user21 she is 😍 hey siri, play perfect by one direction

[doinkbunny]

✧₊⁺ THE RED MEANS I LOVE YOU 𝜗𝜚

𑁯 Yandere ENA admiring reader.

ᵎᵎ.˖ꪆ𖠵꒷ Pst! Cherry says: In which you ramble like a kid to ena but she's too distracted admiring to pay attention. This fic was fueled by my absolute adoration with this silly girl, i need her so baddd so i might make another fic like this if this gets enough attention. (There's mlp reference in this btw.)

.ᐟ.ᐟ.ᐟ Warnings: Obsession (duh), possessiveness, Meanie is almost cracking while salesman is on her last thread.

𝜗𝜚 Type: Fluff, romantic, one shot.

｡𖦹°‧ Song: Lovers rock.

"Beautiful, so beautiful," she felt so fuzzy anytime she looked or talked to you.

That's one of the many, many things you were doing to her, and there are so many reasons why. She loved the way your lips moved, the way you'd subtly increase the intensity of your gesticulation whenever you got too excited talking, and even when you would accidentally choke over your own words.

She was head over heels for you. It was quite the exquisite scenario, even: someone making the unforgivable and chaotic ENA grow a feeling or two. And obliviously.

You were sat with ENA near the lake, your hands moving random circles and squares in the air, your feet touching the water subtly with some of your hand movements while you intensely ranted to her, your excited tone never wavering.

And so did Ena's continuous admiration.

As you kept going with your explanation of some type of pony cartoon, Ena couldn't help but admire the way you looked so excited to talk to her, of all people. Most people would have distanced themselves once they heard the rumors about Ena, but you? No, you were different.

And maybe that's why she's so hooked, because you treated her like a human, something visible and with feelings—the bare minimum.

And only God knows how that made her feel good.

You made her feel something she'd never felt before so spontaneously, it was almost soul-bonding, and that's when she immediately knew you two needed to stay close.

To her luck, you actually enjoyed her presence and would often seek it more than she wished for, consequently making her need to see you satiated. That was good.

What was bad, though, were the times she'd have to stay away from you—unwillingly, making her miss you almost immediately.

These times would come so suddenly, and not only because of her stupid jobs from her deplorable job. Sometimes duty calls for you, and then, she'd be forced to just let you go.

While her salesman side was good at hiding her frustration, Meanie was almost combusting from the inside out, forcing Salesman to take control in order to avoid any... mistakes, letting you go so easily but hesitantly.

And once you're gone? That disgusting sensation of longing to feel you once again would fill her quite quickly; that would make any hidden frustration pop out like a balloon under any slight pressure.

Ena can't handle it—she wants you so badly. Your detailed and well-rendered polygons against her badly loaded ones makes her feel so less nauseous.

Gosh, she wishes she could just—

"Ena?" A voice calls out, her name catching the desired attention; hers, shutting down the continuation of her previous thought quickly, her head jerking slightly from on top of her palm that was supporting it before, her eyes landing on the source that called her name.

You.

Her signature smile popped on her face rapidly as once her attention was back to the world outside her thoughts, erasing any trace of possible tension.

"I'm sorry, my dear, I've gotten quite distracted by my own brain. What was the topic of the conversation, again?"

"Oh, nothing, just a silly show about ponies and friendship... What were you thinking about, anyways? You looked pretty deep in thought."

You curiously and somewhat worriedly asked, gaining a different type of endearing smile, a little short laugh, and a light pat on your head from Ena, her eyes closing ever so slightly with the smiling.

"I can assure you it's nothing but some silly reflections. Don't worry your pretty little head."

Word Count: 382

[auroralwriting]

spencer smut perhaps? he's all shy but the second your lips touch his he snaps?

guilty as sin

spencer reid x fem!bau!reader (18+)

you think spencer's too shy to do anything, until he gets a taste of you

word count: 2.7k

warnings: smut, dirty talk, p-in-v, wrap it before you tap it, sort of dom!spencer, multiple orgasms, spencer is whipped, season seven spencer is implied, soft and fluffy but also a smidgen kinky, spencer’s a gentleman, he’s still a nerd, begging, orgasm denial, he’s also a tease, light praise, it’s smut you get the gist

"Oh, come on? You're seriously going to sit there and tell me nothing happened with Lila Archer?" Emily laughed as she sipped on her beer.

It was a chilly autumn night. Your team had just returned home from a case a few hours prior. You were still dressed in your work clothes, like the rest of our colleagues. Somehow, you were convinced to go to the bar before it got too late into the evening. A sort of celebration that you all had caught the killer so quick with only two casualties. That was rare. Emily had even convinced Hotch to join you all. Since meeting Beth, he'd began to grow out of his shell. It was nice to see him happy again.

The liquor in all of your systems was enough to allow the silly conversations to flow with ease. Seeing as Emily and you had not been on the team when the Lila Archer stalking case was worked on, you had a fair amount of questions.

"You were with Lila Archer, alone, for hours on end," Emily took a sip of her drink as she continued her mini-rant. "and you didn't bang her?"

Derek emitted a slight chuckle, "Well, she did make out with him in the pool."

"The pool? Spence, you dog!" You gasped, quickly following it up with a laugh.

Deep down, this conversation bothered you. Maybe it was due to the fact that you had the biggest crush on Spencer. Or it could have been the way JJ was staring at you, no doubt profiling you. She was the only one who knew of your feelings for the genius. Of course, she was nothing but comforting and supportive. JJ was trying to catch a read on if she should end this conversation before it really got to you.

"I- She initiated it," Spencer weakly defended. "I just, well, kissed her back." The whole table erupted in oohs and laughs.

You kept your longings locked from the man. Kept in faded color, lowercase, locked away inside some secret vault you kept in your heart. It was better this way.

"You don't have it in you to do anything more, my man." Derek slapped Spencer's back. His words, meant to be supportive, just plain were not. "A man of honor, truth, justice, pat-"

"All right, I think we've all had enough to drink tonight." Hotch cut off Derek's drunken ramble. "Let's all make sure to call cabs home."

You grabbed your belongings, just a jacket, purse, and scarf, and stood up along with the rest of your friends. Everyone bid each other goodnight, small hugs passed along. Reaching in your purse, you went to grab the twenty you'd left, just in case. Your purse, however, was seemingly empty, besides a lipstick and your wallet. "Oh, shit." You muttered, having no way to pay for a ride home.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Spencer asked, hearing your call of distress.

Shaking your head, you pursed your lips. "I don't have any cash to get home."

Spencer was quick to reply, "Oh, well why don't you just ride with me? Riding with another person is thirty to fifty percent more safe than being alone, especially while intoxicated. Uh, you can just spend the night, I know you live further away and I'm sure you're tired."

"Thanks, Spence. I'll pay you back," You offered as the two of you walked outside. You felt a chill run up your spine due to the cold, September air.

"It's no problem." Spencer nodded, reaching over to slightly tighten your scarf. The touch of his fingertips on your neck was enough to warm you up completely.

Penelope gave you one last squeeze as you hopped inside the cab with Spencer. The ride would only be fifteen minutes away from his apartment, which wasn't bad.

You stared out the window, watching as it fogged. You dragged your finger over the condensation, drawing yourself a little picture to keep occupied. Your eyes cast up on their own, deciding to focus on the reflection in the window. You were sure glad they did. Spencer was staring at you, unaware that you could see him. His stare sent another round of shivers down your spine.

Always the gentleman, Spencer helped you out of the car once you'd arrived to his apartment. It hit you that you'd actually never been to Spencer's apartment before. You wondered if it looked anything like you'd imagined.

And it was. Exactly as you'd imagined, actually. Dim, warm lights that gave a cozy feeling. He had a brown, leather couch with a green blanket over the top. Books were scattered all over the apartment, but it was done neatly. They were probably organized in a way that would only make sense to Spencer.

"Sorry it's such a mess," Spencer apologized, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck.

"It's not at all," You replied. "I guess you've never seen my place."

Spencer hummed, "I haven't."

Being a good host, Spencer offered to make you some tea. You sat at his island while he poured some water in a kettle to heat up.

"So, you know you can be honest with me, right?" You decided to awkwardly start a conversation. The silence was just not doing it for you.

"Of course I know that," Spencer nodded. His back was turned to you as he prepped your mugs.

You shook off your nerves, "Did you actually not sleep with Lila Archer?"

Spencer turned around at your words. "I didn't sleep with Lila Archer." He confirmed. "If I did, you know Morgan wouldn't stop talking about it for the rest of our lives."

A small chuckle came from you. "He really wouldn't." You mused.

"Plus, she's, uh, not my type." Spencer boldly continued after a pause of silence.

"What is your type?" You asked curiously, heart increasing, a deep hope he said you were his type.

"I don't know." Spencer mumbled.

The kettle began to whistle, you could see Spencer's body physically relax at this. A distraction. He passed you the tea which you graciously thanked him for. The two of you sat in a comforting silence as you drank.

Spencer looked so gorgeous in this way. His hair was a bit disheveled, untamed from the long flight. His eyes held no signs of tiredness. Your case was in California. You'd left this morning. He must've also slept the whole way home. His brown locks mesmerized you. Oh, how you wanted to curl your fingers in them. Not to mention the ghost of stubble on his face. You imagined tracing your fingers over it softly, wishing to feel him shiver under your touch.

Maybe it was the remaining alcohol still in your system, or maybe pining after him wasn't doing it anymore. You don't know what came over you when you leaned forward, your nose nearly touching his.

Spencer didn't move, you didn't move. It was an odd standoff. "Spence," You softly mumbled his name. You could see his eyes staring down- oh. At your lips. Somehow, you knew he wouldn't do it You watched the way his adams apple bobbed as he swallowed a gulp of nerves.

It was like he couldn't speak. But you knew it the moment you locked eyes again. You'd know that look anywhere; desperation. It was probably gleaming in your eyes, too. You could definitely feel it.

A sudden wave of confidence crashed over you and you felt yourself pushing your lips against Spencer’s. It took him maybe a full second to process what was happening. His large hands came to grab your face, pressing you closer to him. The kiss felt like nothing you’d expected of Spencer. He took control over the situation quickly. He pushed against you hard, slipping his tongue between your slightly parted lips. It was messy, rough, yet filled with such genuine passion it was dizzying.

“Spence,” You pulled back breathlessly. His eyes were filled with something new, something more lustful.

He softly shushed you, hands still on your face, pulling you back in. It was slightly teeth-clashing, hot. “I’ve been waiting for this,” Spencer muttered between kisses, his voice a near whine. “Just couldn’t make the first move.”

Spencer pulled back, rushing around the counter to where you sat. He pushed apart your legs to stand in between them. His fingers grabbed your chin, thumb on it and his first finger under your chin. He gently forced your head to look up to him. His cheeks were flushed, and you assumed yours were a near identical reflection.

“Tell me what you want,” Spencer whispered. “Tell me what you want and I’ll give you anything, everything.”

“You, I just want you.”

That’s all it took for Spencer to kiss you again. your hands went around his neck to pull off his tie, your hands then moving to unbutton his dress shirt. His worked just as quickly to undo yours.

“Not here,” Spencer muttered, eyes falling to your half-bare chest. “My room’s down the hall.”

With Spencer’s hand in your own, you quickly ran to his bedroom, a soft giggle escaping your lips and how cliché this all felt. Spencer couldn’t help but smile at your amusement. You leapt onto his bed, landing on your knees as you wrapped your arms around his neck, playing with the hair that ended on the back of his head.

“Hi, boy genius.” You smiled, voice soft and warm. It reminded Spencer of a hot vanilla latte, or maybe something like a cinnamon roll. Sweet, warm, delicious.

“Hi, pretty girl.” Spencer replied, thumb rubbing sweetly over your cheek.

You both stared into each others eyes for a moment, taking in the delicacy of the intimate moment. Spencer slowly pushed his lips onto yours. It was the most gentle kiss of the evening, and it reminded you that Spencer wasn’t doing this because he felt like it. No, you were his type. Not Lila, you.

Spencer and you slowly discarded the rest of your clothing, allowing Spencer to slowly drag his fingers over your bare skin, admiring your beauty. “You’re almost as beautiful as Aphrodite,” he muttered. “I would say prettier, but the ancient Greek believed it would curse whomever was called more beautiful because Aphrodite wanted to remain the most beautiful.”

Even during moments like this, you loved Spencer’s rambles. Slowly, Spencer began to kiss all around your jaw, moving down your neck and to your chest. Your hands found his hair as you arched into him. He spent some time licking and sucking on your chest, loving the way you sounded for him, the way you pulled on his hair. He loved the smell of your skin, how soft it felt beneath his lips and tongue.

“Spencer,” you whined, pulling harder on his hair.

The man looked up to you, eyes gleaming as his mouth popped off you with a small pop. “Yeah, baby?”

“I need more,” you replied.

“Like what?” Spencer teased, slowly dragging his finger down your stomach. “Need more here?” He asked, playfully biting at your chest. “Or… here?” Spencer’s fingers trailed over your thigh, slowly moving from the inside to the out.

You groaned, “Oh, there! Please, there!”

Spencer also groaned in reply, “Didn’t take you as a begger,” he muttered. “but I love it.”

Slowly, Spencer moved his finger to your aching core. It slowly ran through your folds, causing you to moan loudly. “Spence,”

“Is this all for me?” Spencer cockily asked, referring to your wetness. You nodded quickly, pulling him down to kiss you once more. As he kissed you, he slid a finger inside, just to the first knuckle to gather some of your slick. He brought it back out and slowly began to circle your clit with it. Pulling back from the kiss, you became a mess of moans, whines, and breathy sounds. Spencer slowly kissed up and down your neck as he played with your sensitive bundle of nerves. “This enough for you, baby?”

“Inside,” you stumble out. “Please, inside me.”

Spencer couldn’t help but give you exactly what you wanted. How could he when you begged so nicely for him? He brought that same finger back inside, plunging it until it reached his final knuckle. Slowly, he began to pump it in and out of you, allowing you grace to adjust to the new object inside you.

“How’s that?” Spencer asked.

“Good, so good,” You babbled.

His finger multiplied and became two. They pumped in and out, adding slight curls to his fingers every now and again. His thumb went back to your clit, slowly rubbing it for added pleasure. “This what you wanted, sweet girl? This what you’ve imagined me doing to you?”

“Yes, yes!” You moaned.

Spencer smiled, “I’m not going to lie, I’ve imagined this moment for the last year.” In any other occasion, you would’ve became bashful at the declaration, but you were already too far gone with the alcohol and pleasure in your system.

It was then Spencer’s fingers hit your soft spot, causing your back to arch. “Oh, baby!” You cried out, grabbing onto the man above you and wrapping your legs around his waist to feel him deeper.

“There?” He asked.

“Oh, yes! There!” You answered quickly.

Spencer worked his magic, adding another finger as you stretched for him. It didn’t take long for your first orgasm to hit you like a sea of stars. Spencer softly shushed you, helping you relax.

“You okay?” Spencer smoothed your hair as he looked at you carefully.

You nodded, “Please, Spence. I want you.”

Spencer wasted no time lining himself up with you, allowing some of your slick to gather on his hard-on. He pushed in, causing you both to groan in unison.

“Oh my god,” he breathlessly said. “You’re so tight, oh my god. Baby, you feel so good.” His voice raised, slightly higher than normal as he resisted the urge to move until you said so.

“Move, move, please,” You told him. He wasted no time pushing his hips forward and backward, pulling your legs up around his hips once more.

He fit you so good, so right. Everything in that moment felt perfect, like he was made for you. You were made for him. It took Spencer less than a minute to be snapping his hips in record time. You felt like your eyes were going to roll back at the pleasure.

Spencer grabbed your chin the way he did earlier, “Look at me, baby. Wanna see your pretty eyes.”

Still reeling from your last orgasm, it took you no time to feel your climax approaching once more. “Spence, I need to come,”

“Not yet,” He groaned. “‘M almost there, baby. Hold on,” You felt a loud whine emit from your throat. The sound of it made Spencer’s dick throb, and you felt it. “Doing so good for me, honey. Oh, god, I’m almost there. So good.”

You were on the brink of orgasm. You weren’t sure if you could hold it any longer. “Spencer!”

“Where?” He asked.

“In, oh my god,” You practically were yelling at this point.

“Let go, baby,” Spencer’s words were all you needed to finally reach that sweet, sweet release again. You felt him spill inside you, the warmth making your orgasm feel even better. Spencer’s arms slowly gave out above you, and he slowly fell onto your chest. He pressed his lips to your hair, a sweet gesture.

The two of you laid there, catching your breath. You played with Spencer’s curls as he gently rubbed your cheek with his thumb. “I kind of have a crush on you,” You admitted jokingly, knowing he knew.

“Yeah?” He chuckled. “I do too.” He sat up, pulling out of you. You wished he didn’t; it felt so empty. “You gotta go pee, right?”

“Yeah,” You groaned lazily, slowly sitting up. “Hey, you’re gonna take me on a date after this, right?”

Spencer nodded with a smile, “I already have it planned. Now, go use the bathroom so we can fall asleep together.”

You mock saluted at him, “Yes, sir. I’ll be right back.”

Who knew your night out would lead to the best night of your life?

[ozzgin]

What would happen if streamer reader expressed having a favorite regular? I'm fearful but curious

Oh, it would be chaos. Perhaps you didn't even mean to frame it that way; it merely slipped that you converse significantly more with one of the monsters in your following. You try to rectify your mistake, but it's too late. Your loyal groupies are particularly upset.

LizardKing5 would immediately burst into an angry rant, tearing down every other monster he can think of and giving you reasons as to why he's obviously much better. It's alright, you're just a silly human. Clearly you don't know better.

LizardKing5: Who is it, (Y/N)? Huh? I have all evening. What could you possibly talk about with these imbeciles that singles me out? LizardKing5: Give me a name LizardKing5: Was it that damn shark grandpa? I'll grill him SharkMan: Exceptionally rude of you!

SharkMan tries his best to be understanding, though if he is to be honest, he can't deny the faint pang of jealousy tugging at his chest. Why, of course you might have other monsters you prefer. It's just, well...He was hoping he'd earned a special place in your heart. He's always looked after you, so he was certain you'd trust him enough to make him your primary confidant.

SharkMan: Please don't feel bad about your sincere feelings, (Y/N) dear. It is only normal to feel closer to some than to others. SharkMan: ...I would love to take you out for a coffee, so you could explain to me what makes this individual so extraordinary and worthy of your favoritism.

DefNotAStalker is not shocked in the slightest. After all, he is right there with you and knows all of your conversations and secrets. Moreover, he's rather confident that no other monster has the same kind of intimacy with you. He'll just silently observe as you squirm in your seat, stuttering excuses and reassuring the enamored masses.

Y/NSimp is convinced you're talking about him. Of course, you're using code names so that no one can figure it out. It makes sense. He'll nod to himself, smug and proud. While the other monsters rage with jealousy, he'll lean back in his chair with a humble nod.

Y/NSimp: Guys, guys...clearly this guy must be one hell of a monster. You can't decide who (Y/N) prefers. Let it go. LizardKing5: Let me guess...you think this is about yourself. Y/NSimp: Oh no, I'd never~! It's okay to feel insecure, man. I'm here if you need a hug. LizardKing5: See, this is why you're not party of any groups. Y/NSimp: what groups Y/NSimp: hello?

HornyMantis has no idea what the hell is going on. He was entranced by the way your boobs jiggle slightly underneath your hoodie every time you raise your arm. Did you say something? Why is everyone furiously typing? He tries to scan the flood of messages, still in a daze. Something about a favorite...Ah!

HornyMantis: are we talking about our favorite (Y/N) parts? HornyMantis: boobs HornyMantis: or...? let me think about it HornyMantis: nah HornyMantis: it's boobs

[clouji]

Don't get high with Hamzah. He will strip you naked.

+ fwb!hamzah x reader, smoking weed, drinking, making out

💟

“Y/N why is this couch shaped like a L but feels like a circle?”Martin laughs as he sits across two pillows, a beer in one hand and his socks half-off.

Hamzah breathes from the opposite end, a vape pen attached to his fingertips. “That's how you know it's a good living room. Everyone ends up touching their knees, no matter they like it or not.”

You laughed, sitting crossed legs on the floor, back against the couch, sipping just juice with a splash of vodka. Claire texting between sips of her drink. Mandy is next to her, wrapped up with Martin like a cat.

And of course, Chase is in the kitchen arguing with the air fryer.

“I'm still laughing about what Hamzah and I did few days ago,” Martin says, chuckling.

Mandy answers. “What happened?.”

Hamzah just grins, eyes low. He already knows where this is going.

Martin jabs a finger toward him. “All I gotta say is, Don't get high with Hamzah. He will strip you naked.”

Everyone laughs.

Even Claire drops her phone. “I knew something happened!”

“Bro you're making it sound weird,” Hamzah says, without even denying it.

“It's not my fault people like Martin can't handle my aura.”

You keep your face blank. Sips your drink.

You shouldn't be thinking on what happened that night. Or every other night. Or the times it didn’t even need weed. Just one look, a single touch of his hand when no one was looking.

Martin’s still talking. Something about how he ended up in just his boxers watching Love Island with Mandy at 2am. Everyone’s laughing.

Except you.

And Hamzah.

You felt his eyes on you–quick, tense, and gone like it had never happened.

You knew it too well. The kind of knowing that burned under skin and behind closed doors.

⏭️

Everyone's about to leave. Claire and Mandy saying their goodbyes to the cats. Martin drags Chase out of the kitchen, still mid-rant about his overcooked fries. Hamzah stayed like he's just the helpful friend staying to clean up.

Which he is...... kind of.

Hamzah throws a pillow back onto the couch and kicks his feet up as if the party had never stopped.

“Wanna see something crazy?” he says.

You raise a brow. “If that's some stupid shit Hamzah, You're leaving.”

He smiled, reaching something on his pocket and pulling out a half-used joint in a crusty Altoids tin. "Look what Martin and I didn't finish."

You laugh. “So you just have it with you the whole time and didn't say anything?.”

“But I wanted to smoke with you,” he says, “so let's finish it.”

You roll your eyes, but take a hit when he hands it to you. The smoke is nice and warm, quickly taking into your body. He's already leaning back and exhaling like if it's some kind of spiritual experience.

“You really stripped that man on 4/20?” you ask, laughing.

Hamzah chuckles. “He said he was hot. I said prove it."

“Dumbass.”

He smiles at you, lazy. “You scared I’ll try it on you?”

You start to cough a little. "I am not scared. You'd have to earn it."

“Oh word?” he says, puts down the joint into a nearby cup.

And then he moves closer.

Not too much. Just enough, his leg brushing yours, his hand ghosting along your collarbone, every movement tight with the things he couldn’t say. He craved you, and it was killing him to pretend he didn’t.

“Prove it,” you say.

He leans in slowly, as if everything is still a joke. But when his lips meet yours warm and slow—it feels like a stab to your chest.

The kiss starts soft.

It doesn't stay that way.

Your legs twitch. His hand slips gently to your waist. You pull off his hoodie, and he smiles gently against your mouth.

“Still not scared?” he murmurs, lips brushing your mandible.

“Shut up,” you responded back, grabbing him again.

His hoodie slips off. Yours comes next. Nothing special. You already know how this works. He throws your shirt off. The tips of his fingers trace the border of your waistband

The smoke still swirls in the air. Everything still smells like weed, perfume, and snacks.

His mouth meets yours again. Impatient. A bit familiar.

This is how it has always been–hot, hungry, and temporary.

Nobody knows about this.

And that is the fun of it.

💟

[captain-huggy-bear]

Congratulation on 1,000 followers 🤍 Can you do "You're so cute when you get angry." + Luke Hughes ? Thank you !

Thank you and everyone who's been so patient while I work through these! It's been a while but I hope you enjoy it despite the wait :D 1000 Followers Celly Finished Requests are currently closed while I work through current ones <3 Writing Masterlist

"Luke Warren Hughes!"

"Ohhhh she middle named you! You're fucking in for it, man!" Jack laughs, leaning back on the couch grinning at his brother like he's waiting for the show to start. If there's a benefit to living with his younger brother and his girlfriend then it was watching you tear Luke a new one when he did something wrong, like dinner and show. Jack was tempted to go get some popcorn.

"Shut up!"

"What the fuck did you do?" Jack laughs as Luke's face pales, blood draining as his baby brother tries to think about what he possibly could have done to get the middle name treatment from you.

"I don't know!" Luke hisses, standing to attention and tone changing to overly sweet and soft when you appear in the door way with a face like thunder, "Hi, baby..." The smile Luke sends your way is nervous, a tad unsure.

"Don't you 'baby' me, Luke Hughes. Why the hell is this-" You hold up one of his dirty socks, held between two of your fingers as far from you as possible, "and the rest of your stinky hockey kit, on top of my freshly cleaned laundry?"

"Uh..."

You don't stop, just continue in a frustrated rant that has your nose scrunching, crinkles appearing around your eyes. "I'm starting to get really fed up with this, Luke! You know you're supposed to put the dirty laundry in the laundry basket or by the washing machine..." You keep going, but Luke's started to tune you out. Not on purpose!

It's not that he's not interested in what you have to say or that he doesn't care about the fact he's clearly upset you, it's just...well, you're fucking adorable when you're mad at him. Your cheeks puff out, your nose scrunches, your hair seems to take on a mind of its own...and well, you're distracting. He can't help that he gets that soppy, lovesick smile on his face, that all he can focus on his how adorable you look having a go at him. He barely even process Jack's groan from the couch as his brother grows sickened by just how in love he is with you.

"Oh my God, seriously?" Jack groans as he gets up to abandon the area and the sight of his brother being actually disgustingly in love. Gross.

You're still rant at him, pacing back and forth now until you turn sharply on your heels and stare him down, hands on your hips, "And why are staring at me like that?" You snap at him, frustrated that he doesn't seem to be listening and just seems to be grinning at you like that.

"You're so cute when you get angry." It stops you clear in your tracks, some of that anger and frustration just...melting away almost instantly. Because Luke's voice is so genuine, so sweet, because his smile is less of a grin now and more of a soft lovesick smile...because it's hard to be angry at him about something so simple when he looks at you like that in that big baggy hoodie of his.

"Luke..."

"I'm sorry...really, baby, I'm sorry. I won't do it again, I promise." He bridge the distance between the two of you, large hands rub down your arms and pulling your hands away from your hips. You practically deflate, all anger leaving you.

"Pinkie promise?" You hold up your little finger in front of you and he can't help but huff out a laugh, ruffling his curls a little before locking his pinkie with your own.

"Pinkie promise."

[theminecraftbee]

"Cub, now that we both find ourselves trapped in the hinterlands, I find I have a question for you," Scar asks. He's sharpening arrow tips against a grindstone. Technically, this does nothing useful (except for the fact that every time he does it, Cub gets twitchier and twitchier and gets closer and closer to another fletching table rant). It's not about effectiveness, though; it's about the fact that Scar is pretty sure Joe is somewhere out in the bush and he wants to threaten the man obliquely.

"Shoot," Cub says. "Actually, wait, do not shoot."

"Aww," Scar says.

"I'm not giving you permission to kill me," Cub says. "You can go kill Joe a few more times."

"Yeah, but that's... well, not boring, it's actually really fun, but still!"

"Tough luck then, man," Cub says.

Scar huffs. "Look, it's just... I liked shooting people a whole bunch, Cub. Chasing them down, everyone being scared of me, I could do whatever I wanted! It was like, super fun, right," Scar starts.

"You know, this shows the inherent problem with the state creating an enforcement class!" Joe shouts somewhere from the trees, giving away his position. "There's a tendency for that class to be just kind of terrible! Scar, that's terrible!"

"Yeah, but like, murder isn't real," Scar says.

"It's true, murder isn't real," Cub says.

"I feel like I should have a rebuke for that but I don't!" Joe says, and then there's a rustling noise like he's changing hiding places now to continue spying on them. Scar shakes his head fondly. What a tricky little puppet. It's too bad they're both in exile now; the inherent threat of exile is part of what made hunting people down fun!

"An-y-way," Scar says. "Anyway! It's just that now that I'm here, I'm kind of wondering, like, what was the goal? I mean, I would have hunted people down to kill them regardless of goal, right. But if everyone is in exile, they can't really... give their permits back? Or get back into compliance with their permits? Since they're, uh, in exile, and don't have access to them?"

"Yeah," Cub says, nodding.

"So, uh, is the goal just to exile everyone?"

Cub shrugs. "Gonna be honest Scar, did not think that far ahead. Did not think that far ahead."

"Oh, okay. Fair enough! I guess we're all just stuck here now, so that's neat." Scar says cheerfully, loading his arrows back into his inventory.

"That's not neat! I just wanted to play Permitmaster! I was willing to put up with your authoritarian incompetence and cruelty, but only if I got to play Permitmaster! And then I got murdered about it!" Joe shouts from a secondary hiding place.

"That sounds rough, buddy," Cub says.

"It's your fault!" Joe says.

"Oooh, you want to know what else can be our fault?" Scar says, ignoring the problem altogether.

"Noooooo," Joe says, voice pitching several octaves higher, and then Scar lunges in the direction of his voice. "Noooo! I haven't even been doing anything again! I'm like, already punished! Scar!"

Scar laughs. "Yeah, but we just talked about how this doesn't matter and isn't actually about punishment! So I want to kill you now!"

"I still don't understand how anyone thought you were ever the good guy," Joe wails.

"Yeah, that's on them," Cub says idly, and then Scar lunges, bow in hand, to chase the panicking puppet across exile. If this had all been pointless to begin with, that's perfect; it means he has the perfect excuse to keep on doing the part that's fun! It's not like he ever cared about the permits in the first place, and he'd just been given permission.

"You know, why did we do exile?" mumbles Cub behind him as he leaves. That, to Scar, sounds like a someone else problem now, so he leaves that behind.