#effluentbalatron

[gulescamisade]

Betty Crocker Headquarters:  Arrival

JADESPRITE: -She drifts -- or rather nyooms down toward the lakehouse encampment, green glowy gooing her way through one of the walls and looking around for just about anyone that's in sight.-

DIRK: -HE'S HERE. just sitting around the living area with his leg bouncing restlessly. he glances in jadesprite's direction when she oozes in.-

JADESPRITE: dirk!!

JADESPRITE: everyone

JADESPRITE: we need to go

DIRK: -OH GOOD. AN EXCUSE TO STAND UP. he does that.-

DIRK: What's up?

JADESPRITE: somethings happening at the hq

JADESPRITE: terezis there

JADESPRITE: i think this might be our chance

JOHN: -stands up- 👀

ROSE: -She's fiddling with her needles. The creepy ivory quills she got from deep down on LOMAT. She's going to be using them pretty soon, it seems, might as well be ready.-

ROSE: You mean already?

JADESPRITE: -she nods- we should head there now

JADESPRITE: im sure shes going to need our help

JOHN: -isn't terezi supposed to be dead??? but now is no time for questions he has BEEN ready for action.-

JADESPRITE: where is everyone else? we should get everyone

URSAIS: -SHE'S HERE TOO. Bear rumble.- should i rally th' troops? they're on standby.

ROSE: Some injured, but I suppose most of us are... around the area.

ROSE: Do you have a large bell we could ring to summon them? Communicators would probably tip them off.

JOHN: i have an airhorn.

JOHN: :D

DISCIPLE: -her eyes peek from atop a shelf-

JOHN: -he really wants to use the airhorn.-

DIRK: Use the airhorn.

JOHN: yesssssssss.

JOHN: -....-

JOHN: -dramatic pause-

JOHN: -HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK.-

DISCIPLE: -YOWLS!!!-

DIRK: -🙏-

JOEY: 8D

JOEY: should we come up with a battle cry?

MITUNA: WH47 7H3 FUCK

LATULA: -well shit an airhorn wakes her up-

MEULIN: -YOWLS FROM SOMEWHERE-

LATULA: SH1T DUD3.

LIFERA: -FUCKING POWER LEAPS DOWNSTAIRS- W)(AT'S )(APP-ENING??

JOHN: (ehehehehhehhehehe.)

JOHN: put up your dukes! it's time to fight!

LIFERA: GLUB???

PENNY: -GROGGY AS SHIT. Walks in.- ugh????

ULFURA: -She's currently outside, just feeding and petting this GIANT ASS DRAGONFLY. Her precious...-

HEITOR: -probably fiddling with the electricity or something-

URSAIS: -texts her and everyone.-

ULFURA: !!

URSAIS: -i really need to think of a cool name for this little abnd of rebels but for now you're just URSAIS'S CREW.-

ULFURA: -SHE IS OKAY WITH THAT NAME!!!-

ULFURA: -At this message, she runs to the lakehouse door and all but KICKS it open.-

ULFURA: WE'RE GOIN'???

PENNY: -squints at everyone...-

HESONY: =He's just been looming in a corner this entire time but was currently ourside on self-appointed guard duty. Since they arrived, he has been uncharacteristically quiet. Best not draw any unnecessary attention to himself and all that.=

URSAIS: we'rRe goin'. and we'rRe gon bring the pain. t' wherRe the fightin is thickest. -glances at dirk.-

ERIDAN: -was watching Sunny this whole time from his brooding place in the ice cream truck. Yeah he knows that color and name bruh. He knows it.-

MICEXA: -She's already paying attention to all this... and heading out to tell Sunny what's up. ANOTHER FACE ERIDAN CAN RECOGNIZE, INCIDENTALLY.-

MICEXA: Hey.

ULFURA: YEAAAHHH!!! LET'S DO IT!!! -jumps and PUNCHES THE AIR.-

ULFURA: SHE'S ALL READY TO GO!!!

ERIDAN: -He's reading all about it on the Alternia newsfeeds, don't worry.-

ERIDAN: -taking this time to change back into his combat gear. Good thing he's outside.-

HESONY: Hey. =he replies, his expression softening a fraction.= Are we moving again?

MICEXA: Yeah.

MICEXA: To the HQ.

JOHN: are we gonna go grab jake? my dad? -IF THEY WERE BRIEFED ON A PLAN...john might've just forgotten it.-

HESONY: =stares like she just grew an extra head= What.

JOHN: -forgive him-

JADESPRITE: it seems like terezi is going to try to get them out

JADESPRITE: but of course if they need help we will help them

JADESPRITE: right?

ROSE: Death really doesn't take the way it used to, does it?

JADESPRITE: no, it doesnt

JADESPRITE: theres definitely something different about her, though

JOHN: lucky for us! -laughs nervously-

JADESPRITE: ... -glances around like maybe she shouldn't have said that-

JADESPRITE: either way, we need to get moving

JADESPRITE: -floats toward the wall-

DIRK: -just grunts about that and tries to raise his voice over everyone's excitement- Ok, I need some of you to stay here and watch the injured. The rest of you follow Jadesprite.

DIRK: ... Like, through the door.

MICEXA: Yeah.

MICEXA: ... This is it.

REDGLARE: -STARTING TO STAND TO LEAVE ANYWAYS-

JOHN: -just starts shuffling towards the door even though he's a doctor....-

JADESPRITE: -schlorps through the wall on that note!-

PENNY: .... so whos stayin?

JOHN: -NOTHING TO SEE HERE.-

DIRK: -points at rose's white board of THE INJURED.- If you're on this list, you're not going.

DIRK: That means you, Redglare.

HESONY: =he laughs, shaking his head= We're going towards the people who want to kill us...

HESONY: =he patted her shoulder and squeezed it.= Okay. We don't stop.

REDGLARE: -STOPS AND STARES DAGGERS AT THE WHITEBOARD-

ROSE: -...one dagger-

MICEXA: -she reaches up to cover his hand with hers, her grip a little tighter.-

MICEXA: You don't leave my side.

REDGLARE: >;|

DAELOS: -Also not too happy about this arrangement because he's on that list.-

REDGLARE: -SITS LOUDLY-

PENNY: what about Riley?? shes sure as fuck not going.

DIRK: Of course she's not.

DIRK: -LOOKS AROUND SUSPICIOUSLY... is she trying to sneak away...-

HESONY: Wouldn't dream of it.

PENNY: -SHE BETTER NOT BE-

DEREK: -walks in- Dont worry I locked her in the bathroom.

HESONY: =also dropping eaves on the people behind them=

PENNY: ... -sNORTS-

PENNY: good deal.

ROXANNE: Good call. -At Derek, yes shes totally been here.-

PENNY: I uh.

PENNY: (God damn it.)

PENNY: I can stay and watch her.

PENNY: and the rest of you folks. nobody get any crazy ideas.

JOHN: -where's kankri? john wants to make sure he stays behind with his tiny knife and otherwise complete lack of being able to defend himself, but also one more hug would't be bad...-

PENNY: -LOOKS ESPECIALLY AT REDGLARE-

KANKRI: -Hes certainly staying behind to take care of people, he knows he and his little knife would be useless on this type of mission.-

MICEXA: .... -sighs a tightly held breath before glancing at the dragonfly.- \|/e should start boarding up.

REDGLARE: 3xcus3 m3?

REDGLARE: Who 1s th1s wom4n. D1d w3 just... coll3ct h3r.

REDGLARE: -GLARES AT PENNY WOW-

JOHN: -SQUEEZES HIM FOR STRENGTH.-

PENNY: ;)

PENNY: from the dump specifically.

KANKRI: -John so help him dont you be reckless.-

PENNY: hi. Im your new nanny.

JOHN: -He's going to be as nonreckless as you can be while you smash people with a hammer and use magic wind powers.-

KANKRI: -J o hn.-

HESONY: =he nodded giving her shoulder one more squeeze. No more promises of living through this. That only ever brought back luck.=

REDGLARE: >;I

URSAIS: -MOUNTS THIS DRAGON FLY like it's no big deal.-

MICEXA: -Well, she's going to do her best to make sure it's true, even if unspoken. She heads for the dragonfly.-

MINDFANG: -Also she is ready to brawl, she even did some maintenance on her arm even without your help Hesony. Now it probably wont fall off while she fights.-

ULFURA: ALRIGHT COME ON GET YOUR FANNIES ON BOARD!!! -gestures aggressively at the many rows of carrying seats on this dragonfly's butt.-

RUFIOH: -Waiting outside for people to gather... he's anxious as he shuffles his wings but. Didn't come here to sit on his ass. As much as he would like to. Shit's scary...-

ROXANNE: -Climbing on board with no time to waste, shes got important people to save.-

HESONY: =yeah, but i bet that piston still sticks, Wolfchow=

JOHN: -While he's huging people, Dirk and Rose also get a squeeze b4 they board. Wait? Is that Rufioh? Also hugged? Meulin? Hugged.- be safe you guys!!!  

LATULA: -HUP. She's climbing on-- she got used to the dragonfly a while ago, slinging out her rifle as she takes a seat.-

LATULA: 41ght!!!!

JOHN: -he's very liberal with these warm hugs.-

MEULIN: -HEY SHE IS HERE, peering out from around the lakehouse.- AH--

MEULIN: EVERYONE'S GOING?

MEULIN: -snugs JOHN!!-

MICEXA: -climbs RIGHT ON BOARD. It's possible she's ridden something similar before at some point as well... but either way, she's not hesitating to get a move on.-

URSAIS: -sitted near the front.-

JOHN: -after he's done spreading his love around, he hover into one of the farthest seats cuz tha back of the rollercoaster is always the most fun.-(

LIFERA: -She runs out and climbs on board, too, also toward the back. She figures they're going to need people watching the butt.-

JOHN: B)

HESONY: =clambers on=

SOLLUX: -And he, meanwhile, finally drags himself out of the lakehouse. His appearances have been infrequent, but he's here now, quiet as he navigates awkwardly toward the dragonfly and then floats himself into a seat.-

SOLLUX: -MAY HAVE SAT ON SOMEONE??? We just don't know.-

URSAIS: o//o -SUDDENLY HAS SOLLUX IN HER LAP. jk. or not???-

SOLLUX: -hello-

SOLLUX: -is this what seats are supposed to feel like???????-

URSAIS: -....clears her throat. casually picks him up and places him into the seat next to her instead.-

SOLLUX: .... 0h.

URSAIS: safety first 'n all.

SOLLUX: ...

ROSE + DISCIPLE ALSO: -OH IF EVERYONES CLIMBING ON THEN THEY ALL GET ON THERE-

SOLLUX: -slowly rests face in hands.-

SOLLUX: -there's no other choice. he's going to have to die today.-

DIRK: -you son of a fuck-

HESONY: =pondering how this crew has survived for so long=

SOLLUX: -LOOK BITCH-

DIRK: -no fuck you-

DIRK: -ANYWAY HES ALSO HERE. AND THE REST OF THE ONES OF MINE GOING.-

JOHN: -WAVES AT THE REST OF THE GROUP!!!-

JOHN: -the ones staying behind, i mean.-

[[ WHAT AN EXPEDIENT PROCESS. Once everyone going is on, Ulfura eyeballs the whole troupe. ]]

KARKAT: =is here=

ERIDAN: -Hi everyone. This fish is here. Most people probably don't know who he is??? He's just a guy sitting here with a big gun in his lap, half his face wrapped up in scarf.-

ERIDAN: - >> -

KARKAT: =SOME DOUCHE=

ERIDAN: -Yeah, true.-

ULFURA: -climbs the dragonfly and gets on the upper part of its back, grabbing reins and settling in up there.-

ULFURA: WE READY??? GIMME THE WORD!!!

ROSE: As ready as I can possibly find myself, yes.

JOHN: heck yes!!!

JOHN: let's try our best everyone. -anime voice on purpose-

JOHN: -the only way to respond to this horrifying situation is to be INCESSANTLY CHEERFUL.-

SOLLUX: (i swear t0 g0d egbert.)

JOHN: (ehehehhe. get fucked.)

RUFIOH: }:o

RUFIOH: -gonna be flying with the gang off to the side... Gives the dragonfly a pat though. Wishing it the best of luck and a safe flight.-

URSAIS: go ahea' and kick off, pupper.

URSAIS: we got a lot a shit to do an little time t' do it in.

ARANEA: -does rufioh mind if she joins him? her wings are getting strength back but she figures she needs them for the battle... so she's giving them a stretch!-

[[ The dragonfly flickers its wings in buggy acknowledgement. It feels so FRESH and reassured now. ]]

RUFIOH: -He does not mind at all. Side eyes Aranea.-

DAELOS: -stares through the window in the rain at her. he wants to slay their enemies alongside her again. :(-

ARANEA: -reaches dramatically for daelos with her heart...-

ULFURA: YEAH!!!

ULFURA: LET'S DO THIS!!! COME ON FLAP FLAPS!!! -tugs the reins gently and nudges the dragonfly with her communing powers-

ARANEA: ::::) -at rufioh-

DAELOS: -just be as ruthless as possible for him-

ARANEA: -SHE WILL-

ULFURA: HOLD ONTO YOUR BUTTS!!!

[[ The dragonfly suddenly lurches, kicking off from the ground, and its wings start flapping wildly to take them up into the sky. Takeoff and landing is the hardest part. ]]

RUFIOH: -pchooooooooooo time to fly!-

URSAIS: -This part always makes her a little queasy. She doesn't like being off the ground. ʕ灬￫ᴥ￩灬ʔ-

ERIDAN: -scrunches up his face at the wind buffeting his hair. He thinks he smells rain on the horizon...-

JOHN: -basically uneffected-

[[ They rise into the sky quickly, if not weaving side to side a few times between the wind and the dragonfly adjusting to its new weight. It soars above the treetops, higher into chillier air. The pressure and wind aren't super comfortable, but Ulfura keeps it from going too high. They're on the way, headed straight for Golden Valley. ]]

ROSE: -Twirling those needles in her hands, thinking. Working off nerves. This... really is happening. The flying doesn't bother her-- it's everything else. It's the fact that she can't even fathom seeing something useful with her powers, or the fact that she can hardly conjure a spark. She just focuses on breathing. Deep breaths. Think. Don't get impaled by a fork.-

ROXANNE: -Is probably sitting next to Rose, because its unlikely she would let anyone else take the seat next to her daughter right now.-

ROXANNE: -And she also glances at her with a touch of concern, but unfortunately most of her expression is just determined sternness for what is to come.-

JOHN: -YELLING to be heard above the wing flaps and buffeting air.- SO! I DON'T THINK. I KNOW THE NAMES OF LIKE ...75 PERCENT OF YOU. YOU WANNA LIKE...TELL ME THEM? -he has his own ways of working out his nervousness.-

HEITOR: NO

JOHN: WELL I MEAN. OKAY. THAT'S VALID. IF YOU WANNA BE A DICK ABOUT IT. ANYBODY ELSE?

ERIDAN: -No. Giving John the cold shoulder. Don't look at him, motherfucker...-

JOHN: -He has his eyeballs on you Eridan. All over you.-

MICEXA: ... -does she even want to yell above this wind...-

HESONY: .... =well he sure isn't going to be an ass! He glanced up to see a flying human. Okay. He will accept this.= ....Hesony. =He says, in his regular voice.=

MICEXA: -side eyes Sunny like pls-

JOHN: -HE IS FLYING WITH EVERYONE ELSE CURRENTLY. ON THE BIG BUG.- HEY...SUNNY? SUNNY? OKAY. NICE TO MEET YOU! I AM JOHN.

HESONY: =EXCUSE only FRIENDS call him that. Whatever=

HESONY: Greetings, John.

MICEXA: -gosh.... she loves this grumpy doofus-

MICEXA: MICEXA NESHEN. PURSUANT SEAKRAIT.

JOHN: COOL. EXCELLENT. THANKS FOR HELPING. -

MINDFANG: -John do not thank them for anything.-

MICEXA: -just sort of softly grunts at that.-

JOHN: - He doesn't know these are the peeps that fucked up his friends otherwise he might be less friendly. -

HESONY: =Anything for Terezi's friends, no matter how ungrateful they are.=

HESONY: No problem. =he says instead=

ERIDAN: -gazing at these legislacerators. Saying nothing. Sipping tea with just the look in his eyes.-

[[ Below them, they'll being to see signs of smoke and fire, and the vague sounds of explosions and weaponry through the buffetting wind. In patches where they can see, it looks like there are scattered Alternian troops fighting little scads of rebels. The further they go, the more fire there is. Looks like quite a few things blew up down there. ]]

MICEXA: -why's this bitch got an in flight beverage...-

LATULA: -SHARP INTAKE-

LATULA: sh1t dud3 th4t lookz pr3tty n4sty.

URSAIS: - EL SQUINTO-

LATULA: no off3ns3 but 4r3 your p33poz gonn4 b3 4bl3 to hold out?

JOHN: - promptly shuts up at this point. he's totally stoked and not sick/scared-

[[ The dragonfly sways here and there to try to avoid the plumes of smoke. It's likely Ulfura is guiding it around them; bugs tend to react badly to signs of fire. ]]

URSAIS: - bracing herself- worRy bout yerRselves.. we'rRe used t' this. shit.

URSAIS: an' stay brRave.

SOLLUX: -he doesn't seem to react much there next to Ursais... just tilted his face out toward the outside of the seat, almost like he would be looking down at the ground if he could see.-

[[ They fly over lakes and green landscape -- it would be beautiful in just about any other circumstance, but today, the serenity of the landscape only seems to be feel cold and empty for the reality of what's happening below. ]]

JOHN: -equips Zillyhoo. It makes him feel better, even if it does put chanting voices in the back of his head.-

JOHN: -zi-hi-hi-hilly hoo~-

URSAIS: -ʕง•ᴥ•ʔง-

HESONY: =Same, Sparky Jr. Cept he has eyes. You dont. Neener neener neener.=

SOLLUX: -LET HIM BROOD IN PEACE, TEREZI'S OLD FRIEND GUY. JEEZ.-

ARADIA: -by sollux cuz you don't get to brood alone-

DIRK: -ha, that gives him an opportunity to brood alone too. YOU CAN'T STOP HIM HE'S IN CHARGE.-

SOLLUX: -oh so now YOU'RE in ursais' lap???-

SOLLUX: -CUT IT OUT GOD-

DIRK: -he might as well straight up be doin the thinker pose he's so contemplative right now-

ARADIA: -where am I...I am everywhere...-

SOLLUX: -just hoping she's flying alongside him tbh-

SOLLUX: -just out there smiling and being a creep-

[[ As they fly along, they'll finally start to see it breaching the line of the trees. The headquarters turned into something almost fortresslike, and empty expanse instead of trees -- water surrounds the building on all sides, centering it in a huge lake. Sticking out of the water nearby is a giant silhouette-style statue, but instead of the businessman it used to be, it's in the shape of )(er Imperious Condescension. ]]

[[ The building has been rebranded, of course. Instead of the original spoon, there's a bright red trident. ]]

ROSE: -eyes that silouette. plz...-

JOHN: :/

DIRK: -squints at all this. that's where they're being held... they're so close he thinks his heart is about to jump right out of his chest. he's never not anxious, of course, but the possibility of him or anyone dying here has never felt more real.-

QIRIN: How charming. ^_^

DAVENFORTH: Qirin please

QIRIN: =SHE'S KIDDING=

ARADIA: 😊

JOHN: okay if we win or finish early can we all mutually agree that needs to be heavily vandalized or blown the fuck up.

LIFERA: -just staring at this statue. It's ridiculous, but also... it's so huge. It looks like the way the Condesce feels -- larger than life, the figure that's loomed over her since she hatched. And now...-

DAVENFORTH: -Puts a hand on Lifera's thigh-

LIFERA: -She sort of jumps -- but only just barely, and looks over at Davenforth. She doesn't smile this time, but she acknowledges him.-

ERIDAN: -He more or less feels the same as Lifera about seeing these real actual headquarters. But with knowing NO ONE, he refuses to voice it. He fixes his eyes on the building, determined. Hopeless.-

QIRIN: =You stop that=

DAVENFORTH: -Squeezes gently. It's all cake baybe, we got this.-

QIRIN: =Get your pessimism out of the optimist club=

MICEXA: -yeah they're probs gonna die-

QIRIN: =what the fuck did i just say?=

ROXANNE: -Why do all you new people always assume we're going to die.-

MICEXA: -LOOK MAN-

HESONY: =because it HAPPENS that's why=

ROXANNE: -Nuh uh. No one is dying this time either, nope.-

HESONY: =thats what he said last time then terezi bit it=

[[ From closer they can also begin to see ships on the lake -- most of which appear to be Alternian in nature, but also some that aren't. There's a lot of pirate-style fighting going on down there. Boy howdy. ]]

MINDFANG: -Nice.-

JOHN: -HE JUST WANTS TO GET OFF THIS DRAGON FLY AND START FIGHTING. It's like ripping off a band aid.-

JOHN: -Hhhhhh-

QIRIN: =Patience, my padawan=

ULFURA: I'M BRINGIN' US IN CAP!!!

ULFURA: -she's starting to weave this dragonfly even more now, to avoid any lines of fire they may ultimately end up in. They're beginning to do a slow circle around the headquarters building.-

URSAIS: ya did grReat now, pupperR.

ULFURA: -SHIMMERS... but quietly.OF COURSE SHE DID GREAT.-

[[ The dragonfly SWOOPS, knocking at the mainsail of one of the Alternian ships on its way around with some of its legs. It rattles everybody a little. ]]

DIRK: -(mccree voice) whoa there- =swears under his breath=

[[ The dragonfly finally swoops down to the platform entrance of the building -- it's almost a tight fit for such a big fucking bug with wide wings, but it manages. ]]  

[[ It lands with an even bigger rattle. ]]

[[http://stmedia.startribune.com/images/10011821%201gmills100114.JPG]]

[effluentbalatron-blog]

-- circuitousGrievance [CG] began pestering effluentBalatron [EB] at 22:45 -- CG: J9hn may I c9me 9ver? EB: yeah of course. EB: you okay? CG: I am fine, I just desire t9 6e in y9ur presence. CG: I will 6e 6y y9ur 6l9ck sh9rtly. EB: okie dokie artichokie! CG: *He is there a few minutes later, just as he said, and kankri knocks on the door to John's room. Whenever he anwers he will see Kankri standing there, tired looking, like hes been aged years by whatever is weighing on his mind. The end of his conversation with Horuss may have been light hearted, but that hadn't full errased the weight of the cloud of depression that had formed over Kankri.* EB: *Is it because he's gotten to know Kankri so well that he can take one look at him and immediately tell something is wrong or does Kankri just appear that shitty rn? John HAS A CONCERN, but instead of saying it right off the bat he offers a welcoming hug.* hey! CG: *He welcomly takes the hug and returns the embrace.* Hell9. I h9pe I am n9t interrupting y9u fr9m anything 6y c9ming 9ver. EB: *lol he has no social life lately.* 'course not. rules is sleepin. -squeezes Kankri to his tid an extra time and also offers a hair ruffle.* CG: *His hair is ruffled and Kankri offers a trying smile for the effort.* That is g99d. EB: ...-that pathetic attempt at a smile confirms his suspicions.- EB: you said you're okay but... EB: sorry man, you don't really look like it. EB: you wanna uh, sit down and talk? CG: *Hes been found out. Kankri sighs and rests his cheek on John's chest.* If it is alright 6y y9u can we start with the sitting and see where it g9es? CG: I ap9l9gize, I am feeling rather w9rn 9ut. EB: okay. fair enough. *releases him long enough to lead him towards the bed where they can chill.* CG: *Hes greatly appreciative of this, and when he can finally sit on it, Kankri feels like he could melt into the bedding. It smelled like John and that in itself was extremely comforting.* EB: *Plops on his belly, stretching out and scooting over to make room, though he can't help but grin a little at the way Kankri...collapses. RIP*. CG: *Rest in peace indeed. Hes very content with just laying here with his eyes closed for a few well appreciated minutes of silence.* CG: ........................... I traveled int9 the v9id with H9russ. EB: uh..... EB: what? EB: *o.o* CG: Yes that was my 9riginal reacti9n as well. *He sighs again and rolls over onto his side to better face John, even if he is still keeping his eyes closed.* He wanted t9 speak with me a69ut s9mething, 6ut his r969t f9rm w9uld n9t have 6een a6le t9 withstand the em9ti9nal distress he was feeling s9 he used a device t9 9pen up s9me s9rt 9f rift. CG: Its in the engineering department. The rift that is. I have n9 idea if any9ne else kn9ws a69ut it. EB: *gives him a wide eyed stare* well ...yeah i knew about it i guess. but i didn't know that regular people could just walk through it. i thought you had to have some kind of special powers or something. CG: Well....either I have s9me s9rt 9f unkn9wn p9wer dwelling within me. 9r the m9re likely senari9 is that just a69ut any9ne can g9 thr9ugh it. EB: *Files this information in the back of his mind for later...but right now he's more concerned about how this fucked Kankri up so badly.* EB: okay....so what happened? CG: 9nce we made it thr9ugh the terrifying travel 9f cr9ssing thr9ugh pure darkness 9n a seemingly destinati9nless path. We just appeared in this r99m, 9ne apparently H9russ had made bef9re c9ming int9 9ur relm 9f reality. CG: A w9rksh9p 9f s9rts. CG: 9nce there we sat and talked. He was highly upset a69ut having met the previ9us Empress 9f 6ef9rus earlier in the day, and claimed the intr9ducti9n did n9t live up t9 his expectati9ns and that he felt inc9mplete and p9intless as far as his existence g9es. CG: And then he pr9ceeded t9 ask me if I felt like my j96 here 9n this ship was w9rth anything, if my pr9fessi9n was truly making a change 9r difference, 9r if I als9 felt just as p9intless 9r inc9mplete since it is n9t as th9ugh any9ne ever c9mes t9 me with pr9fessi9nal advice. CG: He t9ld me a69ut h9w he wanted t9... fade 9ut 9f existence s9 t9 speak. And 6r9ught up the challenges and d9u6ts that c9me with merely existing in life 9r in his case death. CG: I managed t9 settle him eventually. CG: *Slowly opens his eyes to a squint. He has a small headache forming.* CG: It was a l9t t9 take in. EB: *listens to all of this carefully, his frown deepening as Kankri talks. Ouch.* EB: yeah...*rubs the back of his neck* you're not kidding. EB: that'd be a lot for anybody. CG: *Nods slowly.* Im s9rry t9 burden y9u with all 9f this s9 suddenly. EB: *pokes his cheek*. it's not a burden! CG: *Puts a hand to the poked cheek.* Are y9u certain? EB: *pokes him again, more firmly.* yes!!! EB: cuddling is nice and all...but talking is the main point of this thing we got going on, right? CG: *So much poking.* Mhh. Yes, that is true. EB: *releases his cheeks, although honestly he could poke them all day...they're chubby...* EB: so it's not a burden. it's just part of the package. EB: and...normally i'd say someone you haven't known very long unloading on you like that wasn't being very considerate but... EB: the guy is new here. he's lonely and desperate. EB: it sounds like he didn't have many other places to turn. EB: hard not to feel sorry for him too. CG: That is it exactly. He seems t9 have g9tten t9 6e rather f9nd 9f me rather quickly, that 6eing said I appreciate his friendship t99. I was just n9t expecting f9r 9ur c9nversati9n t9 6ec9me s9 seri9us s9 quickly. CG: I think I helped him res9lve... part 9f whatever was upsetting his m99d. And he seemed rather greatful. 6ut I am 9ddly really drained fr9m it. EB: maybe it was because he directed some of the questions back at you instead of just focusing on himself? CG: Perhaps that might 6e it... EB: or...? EB: *raises eyebrows.* CG: 9r.... *He trails off for a moment, looking away from John.* D9 y9u think that I'm d9ing s9mething, making a difference 9r just 6eing pr9ductive at all, with my j96 in c9unseling? EB: hmm..*pokes his tongue into his cheek, thinking about this. He knows better than anyone how few patients Kankri has had, since he's the Medical Director. And he knows how it makes Kankri feel too, even though he's never come out and said it bothers him.* EB: it's hard to say...because it's not my life. do you think if you got more patients, you'd feel more fulfilled? 'cause in that case it's a matter of fixing that problem. EB: but if not, maybe you shouldn't even be a counseler. you can do other things, you know. everybody all over the ship is switching departments and learning new things. CG: Im n9t sure. 6ut even if I did have m9re patients what if I didn't feel anym9re fufilled then I d9 n9w? And if I'm n9t a c9unsel9r then what else? I d9nt happen t9 have any 9ther skills that w9uld 6e deemed useful in any department. EB: well, regardless of skills...what do you like to do? EB: 'cause skills can always be learned. EB: i mean you don't have to have an answer right now. and you don't have to switch departments either. EB: but maybe it's something to start thinking about. CG: May6e. Als9 y9u are right, I pr96a6ly sh9uldnt attempt t9 make a decisi9n right n9w. CG: I will think a69ut it f9r the time it takes t9 answer th9se questi9ns. EB: ...*pauses for a sec and then brushes his palm against kankri's.* EB: by the way, you're not useless. even if you didn't do any kind of job on the ship you wouldn't be useless. a person's job isn't what makes them worth something. CG: *Without missing a beat when John's hand brushes against Kankri's he makes the move to interlock their fingers. And as he listens to what John has to say Kankri's eyes become misty to the point where he needs to blink the threat away.* Thank y9u. EB: *holds his hand as he lays there* it's all good, dude. -- circuitousGrievance [CG] ceased pestering effluentBalatron [EB] at 01:07 --

[colostrumtractatus-blog]

[[ When everyone is least expecting it, a wild power surge is overtaking the ship. For one solid, very scary minute, the engines stop and the lights cut off. The ship is floating in space. RIP in hecking rest, UU. ]] ROXY: =FUCKIN WHOOPS= ROXY: =panicked cursing and fumbling= [[ It's over soon enough. With a distant BANG, another energy surge shudders throughout the ship system and everything begins running as before. The crew can see! But also, what the fuck? It won't take long to figure out the surge had come from the engineering labs. ]] DIRK: -in his quarters, very carefully assembling a sandwich layered with doritos when the lights go out.- What the fuck? DIRK: -and then they come back on.- ... -sighs and leaves the room to try to figure out what the hell just happened. he's messaging anybody who might still be working in engineering right now to see if any of them know what just happened.- DIRK: -EATS THIS CRUNCHY SANDWICH on his way to the labs.- ROXY: =INTENSE SWEATING..... eyeballs her phone.....= ROXY: =STRAIGHTENS ENGINGEERING AND props her feet up. Fingers tented, party hat on her head, overalls dirty as she puts her boots up on the desk...... no foul play here= TEREZI: =Terezi has been on edge since they fled the moon, so her weapon is out in it's (relatively) harmless cane form= TEREZI: =Her vision still feels like someone wiped their hand all over an oil painting, smearing the colors, but she's going to make the best of this pyschadelic picasso-y feel to everything.= TEREZI: =Makes her way to engineering, also giving it an excuse to deliver sollux's weekly salad.= [[ Cool as Roxy acts, there's no denying there's an actual real portal looking machine up and running in the labs. It's as circular as an entrance and... veiled with enough inky blackness to choke a horse. It swirls ominously, leading off to parts unknown. ]] ROXY: =LISTEN= ROXY: =PUTS A SHEET OVER IT... jk she's watching it curiously and almost warily, gun on the table= DIRK: -BUSTS DOWN THE DOOR. except not really. you can't exactly bust down steal sliding doors. he just enters engineering.- ... DIRK: -points at the portal.- That's new. ROXY: ... i thought itd bring the room 2gether [[ Roxy is getting messages from her communicator. Confirmation that it's working. Ping ping. ]] ROXY: =peeps her communicator, it sure is working, she sends corresponding replies= so.... this is a thing 4 a test ROXY: lmao im #2good then again its a cotribubaby =Co-signed with a hornse= DIRK: And... did this knock out all the lights? -approaches the portal and eyeballs-(edited) DIRK: What is it? ROXY: yeeaaaahhhhhhhh this is what done did it ROXY: me n eq and a ghost horse happened..... hes here 2 help apparently and is ghost fef approved TEREZI: =brow lift= 4 L1T3R4L GHOST HORS3? TEREZI: TH4TS TO S4Y, 1M NOT DOUBT1NG YOU ROXY: a horse trapped in a troll spirit ROXY: i call him....... ROXY: sprinkles [[ At this moment, Roxy recieves another message. This one pretty straightforward. "CT: I'm coming out to test it. Standby." ]] DIRK: Ah. DIRK: Sounds legit. ROXY: =looks at her device= sprinkles is on his way DIRK: ... Ok. Now you've lost me. ROXY: the horse troll ROXY: hes got the voidy things like me and eq ROXY: and... hes p dead apparently but he wants to help us and also this old alien race that was wiped out by alternia DIRK: DIRK: So what we've got here is a giant Ouija board. TEREZI: NOBODY L34V3, 4ND R3M3MB3R TO S4Y GOODBY3 WH3N W3 F1N1SH >|O ROXY: p much ROXY: =snrk= DIRK: You're lucky you're so cute, otherwise I'd be pretty pissed you made a horse ghost summoning machine without consulting me. ROXY: =grins and shrugs= ima lovable scamp...... also 2 be fair i didnt think itd be done so soon ROXY: .... then again with 2 workaholics..... :thinking: [[ It's fine. Horuss is dead already and it's not like anything could happen to his GHOST. He's pretty sure. Speaking of the devil... Just as the boundaries of science are pushed, so is the veil of the void. A literal robotic horse is emerging from the dark. This is the body chassis he's chosen to inhabit. Roxy. Behold his mighty metal flanks. ]] HORUSSBOT: -clops onto the scene, hissing out steam from his nostrils. This was happening, this wasn't a fever dream though Horuss would understand if they believed it was. A gloomy sounding voice speaks through a synthetic microphone somewhere... in his body.- I was listening to the entire e%change. If you would allow me to e%plain. HORUSSBOT: Hello. I am here to provide assistance. HORUSSBOT: ... HORUSSBOT: Ro%y. HORUSSBOT: The machine works phenomenonally. E%cellent work. ROXY: =wEHEHZS= ROXY: =inhales, srs face= yes ROXY: ty sprinkles JOHN: -he obviously arrives just in time to witness this happen. w....t....f- DIRK: ... DIRK: ... DIRK: ... TEREZI: ....SH1T! DIRK: -squishes his own cheeks and is just. tiny smile.- JOHN: ......... ROXY: =IDIRK= ROXY: =wheezing noise in her chest... single tear= :'T TEREZI: H4PPY B1RTHD4Y ROXY: from me 2 me the ebst JOHN: what the heck is this JOHN: what the heck is THAT ROXY: john plz dont be fuckin rude JOHN: omg TEREZI: 4 ROBOT HORS3 JOHN, K33P UP JOHN: i can see that but.... ROXY: tthis is sprinkles aka horuss aka horunensea=wheezes shee can't= HORUSSBOT: -Yes. His metal plating catches the light and he holds his goggled horse head up high. He has no idea what a birthday is but if it's anything like a wriggling day...- Horuss. HORUSSBOT: My name is Horuss. TEREZI: 4N 4CTU4L S34B1SCU1T, 1 C4NT B3L13V3 TH1S JOHN: -assumes this is just some weird early thing for dirk's birthday.- ROXY: = TETEREZI= JOHN -ok.jpg.- DIRK: -don't you mean belated... HIS BIRTHDAY WAS YESTERDAY JOHN. - JOHN: -then yes he meant belated dirkus.- DIRK: It's great to meet you, Horuss. HORUSSBOT: I'm sure you have many questions. But please keep a hold on them. HORUSSBOT: I have not been in the physical plane in quite some time and this is... incredibly disorientating. -testing his legs, shifting his weight. Testing his breathing systems. Nickers.- TEREZI: =troll jesus christ= DIXIE CONCLUSION: :eyes: TEREZI: =i reiterate!= DIRK: Actually, I'm willing to accept all of this without question. HORUSSBOT: Then you are more intelligent than you appear to be. -Good job on that. Shakes his mane.- JOHN: -is very not ok with this, but listening to horuss speak has rendered him stunned in silence.- TEREZI: Y34H...W3V3 H4D OUR F41R SH4R3 OF WH4T TH3 4CTU4L FUCKS TEREZI: T4K3 YOUR T1M3 OR13NT1NG TO TH3 L4ND OF TH3 L1V1NG DIRK: ... -wonders what about him doesn't appear intelligent.- TEREZI: =the shades, probably= DIXIE CONCLUSION: -Clip clop, clip clop. He wants to scan the visitor with his sensors. In other words, sniff the other hornse.- DIRK: -fuck.......- DIRK: -takes pictures- TEREZI: =a few sweeps ago, this would have been reaaaaaally strange to her= HORUSSBOT: -brays threateningly- E%cuse me. Lesser creature. TEREZI: =laughs= TEREZI: WH1CH ON3? DIXIE CONCLUSION: -Snuffle. Snort. Twitches ears.- DIRK: -sends these pictures RIGHT to jake without context- JOHN: -he thought he was numb to oddness but this is too much.- HORUSSBOT: -whirring aggressively. He's not happy about this close inspection. - HORUSSBOT: -compels himself to trot. To move. Suddenly rushes forward with force.- HORUSSBOT: -clops right out of the engineering lab. STOMP STOMP STOMP.- JOHN: is this why the power went out???? DIXIE CONCLUSION: :eyes: ROXY: whoops DIRK: Oh shit. There he go. DIXIE CONCLUSION: :heart: :heart: :heart: TEREZI: HORS3 LOOS3 1N 41SL3 TW3LV3 4H4H4H4H4H4 DIRK: -feels the strong urge to... chase... and try to tame him...- DIXIE CONCLUSION: -GALLOPS AFTER THE OTHER HORNSE FRIEND!!!- DIXIE CONCLUSION: -bye bitches- DIRK: And there he go. DIRK: -looks at john.- Anyway, yeah. JOHN: -sighs- i'm going back to bed. JOHN: -WINDY THINGS OUTTA HERE.- TEREZI: =Colors fly everywhere= >|O TEREZI: SUP3R H3LPFUL TH4NKS! EQUIUS: -Appears from the engine room- [[ The aftermath of Horuss's arrival is very obvious. In fact, he's still causing a ruckus in the atrium. ]] EQUIUS: -He was the one that got everything up and running....then decided to make modifications so that power thing wouldn't happen again- ROXY: =she's still here... amoung the wreckage.....= ROXY: so....... EQUIUS: -Sighs a horse sigh- ROXY: mission accomplished? =sheepish thumbs up?= ROXY: =TWO THUMBS EVEN= EQUIUS: D --> I see. Where is he ROXY: he and dixie frolicked out yonder =gestures to the door, voids up some rope= ROXY: should we...? ROXY: ....wrangle? EQUIUS: -Sighs again- EQUIUS: D --> I will handle this. -He pauses though- I would like for you to join, hoovever ROXY: far be it from me 2 turn u down :P =jumps off the desk and makes WAY= EQUIUS: -disappears into the void-

[technologicgodot]

[05:18] -- effluentBalatron [EB] began pestering technologicGodot [TG] at 17:18 --

[05:18] EB: dave! holy shit!

[05:18] TG: yeah

[05:19] EB: i!

[05:19] EB: don't even know where to start. :/

[05:27] EB: could you help me out here, maybe?

[05:27] TG: with what

[05:28] EB: with what the heck he said to you? because you never actually told me.

[05:28] EB: i am really confused.

[05:29] TG: same stuff he says to me all the time

[05:29] TG: how i fuck everything up

[05:29] EB: what, that you're not good enough because you're not from his timeline?

[05:29] EB: that too.

[05:29] EB: well first of all: you don't???

[05:29] EB: and second of all...what does this have to do with me?

[05:30] TG: how i do nothing but fuck around and wallow in my own shit rather than actually keep in contact with people

[05:30] TG: when i do its just not as often but whatever

[05:30] TG: it doesnt matter

[05:30] EB: for fuck's sake.

[05:30] EB: of course it matters.

[05:31] EB: you freaked out back there. real bad. and you seemed really upset. at me specifically.

[05:31] EB: and i couldn't say anything because m'tism but now i want to talk about it.

[05:32] TG: im not upset at you jesus

[05:32] TG: why the fuck would i be upset with you

[05:32] EB: i don't know but you definitley were!

[05:32] EB: or if not at me, at least about me.

[05:33] TG: im upset with myself

[05:35] TG: as bird me pointed out i apparently didnt care enough to know you had a boyfriend

[05:35] EB: oh...

[05:35] EB: that....

[05:35] EB: dave, that's so dumb.

[05:35] EB: i am the one that could've told you i had a boyfriend.

[05:35] TG: cuz im so self absorbed in my shit

[05:35] EB: you're not self absorbed!!!

[05:36] TG: depends on whose opinion you value more

[05:36] EB: dave sprite just has a really spiky stick up his ass becuase all his friends from his timeline died horrible deaths.

[05:36] EB: oh my god. are you serious?

[05:36] EB: yes, i am friends with dave sprite. stop throwing it in my face.

[05:36] EB: you know what i value?

[05:36] EB: the truth.

[05:36] TG: im not throwing anything in your face dude

[05:37] EB: AND THE TRUTH IS.

[05:37] EB: obviously.

[05:37] EB: that it's not your fault becuase you are not self absorbed.

[05:37] EB: you have a wife and a daughter, and a job.

[05:37] TG: can we even say i have a job anymore

[05:37] TG: im still on leave

[05:37] EB: that's not the point.

[05:37] EB: we all have a job, and the job is surviving alternia.

[05:38] EB: and saving lives!

[05:38] EB: and you know what, the even bigger point is like...

[05:39] EB: i am a dumb shit and i don't think to tell any of you guys anything?

[05:40] EB: but it doesn't mean i don't care.

[05:40] EB: i mean, jesus! you guys are the entire reason i came aboard in the first place.

[05:40] TG: i never thought you didnt care

[05:40] TG: ever

[05:41] TG: no one is questioning your actions

[05:41] EB: but i am saying, it's not just your fault either. that we don't talk as much.

[05:41] EB: sure, i wish we talked more but i never told dave sprite that i blamed you for it.

[05:42] EB: look, he's you but he's still a scared kid. and he doesn't know what it's like to have a family. me and rose and jade were all he had.

[05:42] EB: so i guess to him the other stuff doesn't matter as much.

[05:42] EB: just becuase i am friends with him doesn't mean i belive him about everything.

[05:42] TG: you dont gotta tell me how 18 year old me felt

[05:42] TG: i know

[05:42] TG: im well aware

[05:43] EB: dude, i am trying to

[05:43] EB: i just wanna talk to you.

[05:43] EB: climb off my dick, please.

[05:48] TG: i tried to have a normal conversation with him but it didnt happen

[05:48] TG: barely got into a sup

[05:48] EB: he's a huge douche to you, because you're you. we both know that.

[05:48] EB: but it's something else if you actually let it effect how you feel about our friendship.

[05:49] EB: i love you and jade. and i love dove. and i love rose.

[05:49] EB: that's all i care about.

[05:49] EB: all this other stuff...it's bullshit? it's nothing?

[05:49] TG: then tell that to him

[05:49] TG: cuz hes going to keep shoving it in my face

[05:49] EB: it's not my responsibility to do that!

[05:49] EB: like sure, i will. but his problem is with you.

[05:50] TG: yeah i got that

[05:51] EB: okay. i dont' feel like anything i am saying is getting through to you.

[05:51] EB: maybe because you're guard's still up.

[05:51] EB: i get it.

[05:51] EB: let's just talk later when you're less of an asshole.

[05:51] TG: dude come on

[05:52] TG: i dont have any defense left in me

[05:52] TG: maybe thats why i cant handle it when someone is in my face telling me what a fuck up i am

[05:52] TG: and providing examples

[05:52] TG: i understand that you consider me as a friend and youre not mad at me

[05:52] TG: and you dont blame me

[05:53] TG: i believe you

[05:53] TG: but hes just the self deprecation of 18 year old me right in my face

[05:53] TG: and john i

[05:53] TG: i cant fight it

[05:55] EB: i know. i know.

[05:55] EB: i am just really fucking frustrated.

[05:55] EB: because there's nothing i can do to help.

[05:55] EB: i can't help either of you.

[05:55] EB: and you're not the only one that feels done.

[05:56] EB: with what's happeningwith jade and with us about to land on earth like, idk, dude we gotta keep it together.

[05:57] TG: yeah

[05:57] TG: i know

[05:57] EB: like, dave sprite has a problem with our friendship? he's full of shit, fine. we've established that.

[05:57] EB: but let's just talk more anyway.

[05:57] EB: 'cause we both want to.

[05:57] EB: and then he can't say shit.

[05:57] EB: and we'll take care of jade and we'll be fine.

[05:57] TG: ok

[05:57] EB: ok, for real?

[05:58] TG: yeah

[05:59] EB: and btw, i don't know how he found out about the

[05:59] EB: boyfriend thing...

[06:00] EB: i mean, it's true but i didn't tell him that either.

[06:00] EB: i think he spys on me.

[06:00] EB: i mean i wasn't keeping it a secret or anything, i just...jeez.

[06:00] EB: i wanted some time to get used to the idea.

[06:00] TG: so who are you mackin on

[06:00] EB: oh my god...

[06:03] TG: when did you figure out you liked kissing boys

[06:03] TG: are we going to talk about this

[06:04] EB: yes.

[06:04] EB: eventually.

[06:04] EB: right now.

[06:04] EB: ...we're doing it.

[06:04] EB: mmm...

[06:05] TG: uh huh

[06:06] EB: shut up.

[06:06] EB: it's just weird for me, okay?

[06:06] TG: what happened to the whole telling me stuff

[06:06] TG: newsflash its not

[06:06] EB: i know it's not weird for anybody else, i just know it is for me

[06:07] EB: it's dumb, stupid, ect. but idk that's just how it is.

[06:08] TG: not if he makes you happy

[06:08] TG: mystery guy

[06:08] TG: who romances you with petals on the bed

[06:08] TG: trailing to your door

[06:08] EB: there's no!

[06:08] TG: and some cheesy ass saxophones

[06:08] EB: there's no kissing and no bed, there's no saxophones, stop.

[06:08] EB: it's a pale thing.

[06:08] TG: well you could have said that in the first place

[06:08] EB: okay there might be kissing in the future, but we are taking things slow.

[06:09] EB: yeah but...

[06:09] EB: mm. it's a pale thing with him.

[06:09] TG: oh

[06:09] TG: so you like him more than that

[06:09] EB: no, no...

[06:09] EB: i mean like...

[06:09] EB: as far as the whole

[06:09] EB: i guess "bisexual" thing goes.

[06:10] EB: i guess getting into it with him made me reconsider some things and be like "oh fuck, i guess i like dudes too". basically.

[06:10] EB: yeah, that sums it up pretty well.

[06:10] TG: cool

[06:11] EB: yeah.

[06:11] EB: well.

[06:11] EB: that's it.

[06:11] EB: i guess it's not that complicated. or shocking.

[06:11] EB: and it shouldn't really be a big deal.

[06:11] EB: i figured you guys would just figure it out on your own, idk.

[06:11] EB: i didn't want to make a big deal of it.

[06:15] TG: its not a big deal dude

[06:15] TG: youll get used to it or whatever

[06:16] EB: do you like, know that from experience?

[06:16] EB: i know your thing with karkat but like, did it ever make you question things?

[06:17] TG: uh

[06:17] TG: i guess i questioned things way before that

[06:18] EB: oh!

[06:18] EB: really?

[06:18] TG: damn it now i gotta play share with the class

[06:18] TG: yeah really

[06:18] EB: like how before/

[06:18] TG: how detail oriented are we getting here

[06:18] TG: from the second i started liking girls

[06:19] EB: idk. i've got time.

[06:19] EB: and honestly i am pretty curious and this comes as a complete surprise to me?

[06:19] TG: everyones interested in someone elses sexuality

[06:19] TG: and i sir

[06:19] TG: am full of surprises

[06:20] EB: dork.

[06:20] TG: nerd

[06:21] EB: stop stalling and spill the beans, doofus.

[06:21] TG: what am i spilling here

[06:21] TG: i answered all your direct questions

[06:21] EB: idk like??? when did you start liking boys?

[06:23] EB: man, i feel like a jack ass.

[06:23] EB: the whole time we were friends you were into dudes and i didn't even know.

[06:25] TG: just because you question doesnt define anything

[06:25] EB: how come you didn't tell me earlier?

[06:25] EB: if you knew about it this whole time?

[06:25] EB: also like, does rose know? does jade?

[06:26] TG: dude you are making some hell of assumptions

[06:26] TG: this aint a one way trip to gay island while we lounge on the homo beach as the queer sea touches our toes

[06:26] EB: well you said you questioned as soon as you started liking girls.

[06:26] EB: hehe, we definitely talked about girls sometimes.

[06:27] EB: so i dunno. i thought maybe it would come up!

[06:27] TG: i still havent told you anything yet

[06:27] TG: questioning doesnt make you gay dude

[06:28] TG: doesnt make you straight either

[06:28] TG: questioning makes you question

[06:28] TG: thats it

[06:29] EB: now you're just being frustarting on purpose.

[06:29] EB: but w/e i know now.

[06:31] TG: you could ask me to answer it but you havent done that

[06:31] TG: youre just jumpin around

[06:31] TG: john are you bisexual

[06:32] EB: i think maybe

[06:32] EB: yes.

[06:32] EB: are you??? you said no right?

[06:32] EB: you're just questioning?

[06:32] TG: john youre assuming again

[06:33] EB: jesus christ.

[06:33] EB: you're fucking with me now are't you.

[06:33] TG: youre asking weird ass questions followed by statements with question marks

[06:35] EB: the question marks don't invalidate the statement, cockmuppet.

[06:35] TG: so youre making the statement for me

[06:36] TG: you interpret me to be questioning

[06:37] EB: i interpret you to be a jack ass >:/.

[06:38] TG: oh shit

[06:38] TG: im so offended im gonna close this conversation

[06:38] -- technologicGodot [TG] ceased pestering effluentBalatron [EB] at 18:38 --

[06:39] -- effluentBalatron [EB] began pestering technologicGodot [TG] at 18:39 --

[06:39] EB: we are not done here!!!

[06:39] TG: im crying

[06:39] TG: you made me cry

[06:39] TG: my tears are typing for me

[06:39] -- technologicGodot [TG] ceased pestering effluentBalatron [EB] at 18:39 --

[06:40] -- effluentBalatron [EB] began pestering technologicGodot [TG] at 18:40 --

[06:40] EB: tell them to stop writing such stupid dialogue for you then!

[06:40] EB: are you into boys or not?

[06:40] EB: dave!!!

[06:40] TG: i cant they have a mind of their own

[06:40] -- technologicGodot [TG] ceased pestering effluentBalatron [EB] at 18:40 --

[06:40] -- effluentBalatron [EB] began pestering technologicGodot [TG] at 18:40 --

[06:40] EB: ughhh fine. TO BE CONTINUED.

[06:40] -- effluentBalatron [EB] ceased pestering technologicGodot [TG] at 18:40 --

[weatheringquerist-blog]

-- weatheringQuerist [WQ] began pestering effulentBalatron [EB] –

WQ: Hello, John.

WQ: I am loathe to admit, but I have allowed distractions to

WQ: distract me.

WQ: As distractions are prone to doing.

EB: those darn distractions. how dare they. haha.

EB: what's up q?

EB: i hope you don't mind if i call you that. it amuses me a lot.

WQ: John, I do not mind at all. Life in court is as luxurious as one would expect, but it was rather lonely.

WQ: I find comfort in the knowledge that you feel enough at ease to bestow upon me a moniker of your choosing.

WQ: I openly welcome this familiarity. It is rather refreshing.

WQ: This is beside the point, however.

WQ: I understand we are grossly understaffed in mental health?

WQ: I wish to provide what help I can. Your father expressed tutoring regarding this line of work that I am more than willing to attend.

EB: that's no problem at all miss q! you can even use a nickname at me too and i'll support it no matter how weird and awkward it is, haha.

EB: okay, down to business.

EB: i think it's kind of a no brainer. we're still understaffed and you've always been trustworthy and level headed. you can probably help out the other volunteers too.

EB: i'll just assign you to my dad directly. he's the one that can probably handle the most.

WQ: You shall receive a nickname that is fully befitting of your essence.

WQ: My perceived level-headedness took years of mastery, I assure you. I did not start out this way, but then again I do not suppose many do. However, I appreciate you saying so. I will do what I can.

WQ: It would be beneficial if I took pointers from the professional well versed in the subject, so I will be taking your advice and speak to Mr. Egbert concerning this.

EB: alright! hehe. well i just wanna say i'm grateful for you signing up.

EB: it's a really valuable use of your time right now, i promise you that.

EB: anything else i can help you with?

WQ: I.

WQ: Yes.

WQ: Simply a concern on relatively the same subject matter. Or a statement, rather.

WQ: John.

WQ: We have fought so hard to be where we are. Every single person of this crew. Even those who are no longer with us or on board.

WQ: It is difficult to have a world hate you, and even more when it is not only a world that explicitly requests for our capture or annihilation.

WQ: I am surprised we have endured this as long as we have without cracking. It is a rare thing to see from a group this diverse, and even rarer that despite all individual fears we have continued to remain unified.

WQ: I am proud, for what it is worth.

EB: oh. wow.

EB: thank you so much. that really does mean a lot to me.

EB: i am kind of flustered by that! haha.

EB i think you really are going to be one heck of a counseler.

WQ: I am flattered, but I only express what I have seen from both this crew and from what I have known to be true.

WQ: You have been quite the model of optimism, yourself.

EB: there's no reason not to be, right?

EB: let's save the pessimism for when shit gets real.

EB: and we have plenty of opportunities for that, for sure.

WQ: I suppose there is not. As long as the optimism is not burying truer feelings underneath.

WQ: A healthy dosage of smiles is always good to see.

EB: burying truer feelings huh? haha. wow.

EB: that sure is something.

WQ: Not that you are.

WQ: It is simply something often seen in situations where people have no control. Thus it may be something to look out for in those who experience it.

EB: yup. i'd call that a head start!

WQ: ^_^

WQ: In a way it is.

[purrfoldpacificist-blog]

-- purrfoldPacificist [PP] began trolling effluentBalatron [EB]  -- PP: 3833 < *PP sniffs t)(e purrclamed and )(ig)(ly 33lst33med Dr. -Egbert! S)(e gr33ts )(im wit)( a wave of )(er paw and decides )(e smells like fruit candy!* PP: 3833 < *S)(e f33ls so s)(y to say hi like s)(e is... but s)(e )(opes )(e's )(aving a good nig)(t!* PP: 3833 < *But anywaves!!!* PP: 3833 < *PP t)(inks t)(e infurrmary )(as been SUPURR DUPURR QUI---------ET wit)(out )(im t)(ere and )(opes )(e f33ls muc)( better soon!* EB: sorry i um. EB: i don't EB: like EB: who are you PP: 3833 < Um!!!!!!!!! PP: 3833 < I'm Fefetasprite! PP: 3833 < *S)(e meows!* PP: 3833 < I play and )(ide in t)(e infurrmary w)(en no one is looking! PP: 3833 < I've dolp)(inately s33n you t)(ere! And I'm purretty s)(ore you've s33n me too! EB: oh, right. EB: i think i remember you showing up in my office one time. EB: and you were in the talent show. EB: you kicked jade's grandpa's ass. PP: 3833 < )(33)(33)(33!!! PP: 3833 < Yea)(! 38DD PP: 3833 < T)(at was me! EB: yeah, okay. EB: hello. PP: 3833 < )(i! I'm sorry if t)(is is r33ly sudden or if it looks like it... PP: 3833 < But I wanted to purrod you anyway! EB: well. now that you mention it... EB: can i ask why? EB: i mean it's not like i would've been opposed to talking to you. sprites are pretty cool. EB: i like both of the people you modeled yourself after a lot. EB: i'm just kinda wondering like, why now?? PP: 3833 < I guess I've b33n t)(inking a lot... And o)(! I'm not acts)(elly on t)(e s)(ip rig)(t now. PP: 3833 < I'm flying a couple t)(ousand miles off of Catvalon! EB: that's cool. flying is cool. PP: 3833 < Yea)(, I know! <33 PP: 3833 < But anyway! PP: 3833 < I was just t)(inking about stuff and I felt... PP: 3833 < W-EIRD, I guess! EB: yeah? PP: 3833 < I made a new furrond today! )(is name is Davespurrite. PP: 3833 < )(e's furronds wit)( you too, rig)(t? EB: i think so. EB: at least the person he modeled himself after was. EB: and maybe his new self will be but it's probably too early to tell. PP: 3833 < I understand! PP: 3833 < You can't be s)(ore about a lot of stuff rig)(t away. PP: 3833 < )(e just told me a story about )(ow... spurrites are being )(unted in )(is old universe! PP: 3833 < T)(ey don't actually exist anymore over t)(ere! It's r33ly sad! EB: i'm sorry. EB: that really sucks. EB: a lot of stuff about that universe does, apparently. EB: he probably told you. PP: 3833 < )(e did! And I can't blame )(im for f33ling like )(e does. PP: 3833 < )(e's been t)(roug)( a lot... and even if )(e's just a COPY of regular Dave, )(e's still Dave. )(e )(as )(is memories and purrsonality and f33lings about stuff. PP: 3833 < It's like a particular age of Dave splintered off and became )(is own person! T)(at's purretty muc)( w)(at it's like being a sprite! PP: 3833 < So t)(inking about all of t)(is made me f33l like... I s)(ould talk to you! Because t)(e same t)(ing applies to me as )(alf Nepeta and )(alf Feferi. PP: 3833 < I )(ope I'm not making you f33l too sad about my decision. PP: 3833 < You're more t)(an welcome to tell me to stop! EB: i can't do this. EB: i'm sorry. EB: it's too fucking weird. EB: it's making me feel gross. EB: i know you can't help it. PP: 3833 < T)(at's okay! I kind of knew it would be. PP: 3833 < But if you ever want to talk to me, you can! PP: 3833 < I t)(ink it's t)(e most important t)(ing I can say. EB: ok. EB: look, i gotta go. -- effluentBalatron [EB] gave up trolling purrfoldPacificist [PP]  --

[artifactualannihilation]

-- effluentBalatron [EB] began trolling artifactualAnnihilation [AA] at 23:09 –

EB: beep beep.

EB: (:

AA: oh! john! hi!

EB: hey aradia.

AA: what are you up to?

EB: oh uh...

EB: not anything really.

AA: just rolling around?

AA: :D

EB: lol! haha good one.

EB: wheelchair jokes.

AA: thanks

AA: im glad you can appreciate them

EB: i should come up with more while i still can make 'em.

EB: how are you doing?

AA: im ok

AA: just woke up from a nap

EB: really?

AA: yeah!

AA: is it surprising?

EB: well, not really.

EB: that's kind of what i wanted to talk to you about.

AA: naps? hahaha ok

AA: lets talk about naps

EB: haha, not naps you dork.

EB: or at least not naps in general.

EB: i better just spit it out.

EB: i think you've been sleeping too much. but not getting enough rest. and i'm worried about you.

AA: oh!

AA: yeah i have been sleeping more than normal

AA: im ok though

EB: i know you think that.

EB: but i am really not sure if you are.

EB: you're always tired. and you seem like, distant.

AA: would you believe me if i told you its for a good reason?

EB: i mean

EB: yeah, i do.

EB: i want you to find feferi.

EB: but also like...are we even sure she wants to be found right now?

EB: and i know for sure she wouldn't want you living like you've been living.

EB: because she cared about you.

EB: and i do too.

EB: i know we haven't talked a lot lately but i want you to be safe and happy.

AA: thank you john

AA: i guess im being a little selfish arent i

AA: i just miss her so much

AA: when youre granted the means to defy reality and find someone youve lost to another plane of existence its hard not to take advantage

EB: i get it. if i had a way to find her...i'd probably drive myself crazy trying to look for her too.

EB: but if it were me, you'd tell me to stop too right? or at least find a way to balance it better.

EB: there's gotta be a way to do this without losing your sense of uh...

EB: reality?

EB: self?

EB: i mean what about ananya and ruleus? they need us to be around right now more than ever.

AA: do you

AA: really think im that far gone?

EB: i dunno. i haven't been around you much. but the few times i've seen you...you're barely awake.

EB: and i'm not the only person that's worried, you know.

AA: really?

AA: who else is worrying?

EB: just..one of our friends told me i should check up with you. and i started thinking about it.

EB: i should have checked up on you sooner but i've been wrapped up in.

EB: stuff.

AA: youve been recovering john

EB: stuff that's not as important.

EB: we're both recovering.

AA: i guess thats true

EB: i'm here for you, though.

EB: if that wasn't obvious.

EB: i'm not going anywhere.

AA: its more than obvious :)

EB: heheh.

EB: maybe like, you can set aside a day to look for feferi.

EB: and not do it every single day?

AA: maybe just at night when i naturally sleep

AA: ive done ok when ive naturally slept and utilized that time to do what i need to do in the realm of the passing dead

EB: wait, how were you sleeping lately if not naturally?

AA: oh

EB: like....were you hypnotizing yourself or something?

AA: no

AA: well

AA: ive been taking some sleeping aids

AA: without them im not able to sleep on the spot you know

AA: especially with all of the stress and the sadness

EB: jeez!

EB: you can't do that!

EB: you're a nurse, aradia.

EB: you should know better.

EB: when you're stressed and sad is the worst and most dangerous time to take a lot of unprescribed medicine :(

AA: i

AA: didnt think about it like that

EB: you can't just prescribe yourself medicine.

EB: how much were you taking?

AA: just

AA: well

AA: enough that it was constantly in my system

AA: a dose after the other i guess

EB: ...okay.

EB: you know i have to do something about this, right?

EB: i'm not even on duty right now but if you're gonna make decisions like this i guess i gotta step in.

AA: :(

EB: you're suspended from all your duties. and i want you to come give me all the medication you have.

EB: i'll give you a prescription and you can take one a night, when you go to sleep.

EB: you just

EB: need time to get over stuff.

EB: and rest.

EB: okay?

AA: ok

AA: im sorry john

EB: i'm like

EB: mad at you

EB: but i also don't want you to be sorry

EB: i just

EB: i really need you around.

AA: i need you too

AA: i guess i just thought if i could find her

AA: if i tried hard enough

AA: i could make things better

EB: i know.

EB: you don't have to do things by yourself though?

EB: i mean

EB: you have friends.

EB: family.

EB: stuff like that.

AA: yeah youre right

AA: im just the only one i know of that can travel to the realm of the dead

AA: i wanted to take advantage of it

AA: try my hardest

EB: i still think you should do it.

EB: just don't be dumb about it.

EB: we both want feferi back.

EB: you can talk to me about it.

EB: i can't go with you but

EB: i could be there with you.

EB: even though i'm not your boyfriend anymore.

AA: john

AA: are you in your room? can i come over to give you the medicine?

EB: yeah. i'm here.

AA: im on my way

ARADIA: -there's a knock at his door only minutes later-

ARADIA: -it's odd, knocking at a place she used to walk right into.-

JOHN: -he just opens it with his windy thing, seated near his sofa on his wheelchair-

ARADIA: -aradia enters in her sleepwear: a big baggy t-shirt and boxer style short, ananya in a nightgown and fast asleep in her arms. it's easy to see that there are tears rolling down aradia's cheeks when she approaches him- hi

JOHN: -He almost stands up, just a gut jerk reaction to seeing her in tears. It's not a very common sight. It hurts his heart.-

JOHN: -It was true. He was pretty angry, although the anger came from a concerned place. And a scared vulnerable place even further back than that.-

JOHN: -But he can't stay angry when he sees her like that. Not at all.-

ARADIA: -even her wings look not so lively, not now. and she takes a seat beside him, holding ananya with one arm and uncapchaloguing a bottle of sleeping pills to hand over to john at the same time-

JOHN: -With a small sigh, he puts them away, safe in his own sylladex. Pauses and looks at her silently for a moment and then opens his arms, inviting both her and the sleeping annaya into an embrace.-

ARADIA: -she could just hug him from the side, but she ends up standing to gently lower herself and ananya onto his lap, careful to steer clear from any pressure on his stomach, but it's easier to lean against him like that and bury her face in his shoulder-

JOHN: -When he feels her coming in...something happens to him that he isn't really sure how to describe by taking mental note of it. She'll feel a cool tickle of breeze around her that seems to press in from all sides, encasing the three of them in a little pocket of air. He isn't aware he's doing it at first, he's just holding onto her, with his head bowed against her shoulder.-

JOHN: -There's a fresh feeling too. Not in her body, but in her mind. The sensation of blocks being opened. Some things from the present being blurred, while other realities seem to be more clear and acessible.-

ARADIA: -it's a feeling of clarity she isn't expecting, and the way it hits her all at once feels like such a release of tension that it brings more tears out. but it's a good feeling, a safe feeling, a kind of peace and hope where she can see all kinds of possibilities. there are several pathways to be taken in trying to find feferi, but using the method she's been using will get her nowhere. feferi will

ARADIA: find her when she's ready. it's amazing how certain she is of that right now. ananya even seems to relax more between them, despite being asleep-

JOHN: -He doesn't say anything for a long time. He doesn't really realize he's doing bullshit magical things either, having that little breeze around him feels pretty natural by now. But it does dissipate eventually...and he's just holding her in his lap, rubbing her back in circles.-

JOHN: -At some point he snakes a sleeve out to dab at her face-

ARADIA: -her breathing evens out and she lifts her head when he dabs at her face, letting him wipe away the tears- could we

ARADIA: could we stay with you

ARADIA: tonight

JOHN: -Flicks her cheek, with a small tired smile-

JOHN: Duh.

JOHN: -It kinda hurts to know this isn't permanent. But it's much better than the alternative.-

ARADIA: -she returns his smile and weakly laughs- you have room for us in there? -gestures to the bed with her head-

JOHN: -If there's enough room for another dude there is def. enough room for his ex and child. Not that he's going to mention that.

JOHN: Pfft.

JOHN: yeah, i'm pretty sure we'll fit.

ARADIA: great -she smiles- if its ok with you i

ARADIA: think this has a chance of being a more than one time thing

JOHN: uh...

JOHN: you sleeping over?

ARADIA: coming over yeah

ARADIA: just the times that it gets too hard

ARADIA: i might steal your couch

ARADIA: ananya too

JOHN: yeah of course. you're welcome anytime.

JOHN: yeah of course. you're welcome anytime.

ARADIA: thanks john

JOHN: honeslty i uh, don't really like being by myself lately either.

JOHN: -rubs the back of his neck-

ARADIA: it kind of sucks doesnt it?

JOHN: majorly.

JOHN: -watches ananya sleep.-

JOHN: ...is she ok?

ARADIA: -she nods- yeah

ARADIA: she asks for feferi sometimes

ARADIA: you know the whole glubbing thing -she tries to laugh to cover up the fact that her bottom lip is quivering but has to cover her face with one of her hands-

ARADIA: i just dont know how to tell her or ruleus you know

JOHN: i know exactly what you mean. -he cracks a smile as that fish pun stabs his heart.-

JOHN: i mean...

JOHN: she might...

JOHN: -breathes-

JOHN: she's going to come back.

JOHN: maybe it would be better for them to believe she's gone but..

JOHN: i can't bring myself to say that.

JOHN: not when we don't know for sure.

JOHN: i'd rather just wait with them.

ARADIA: -she nods quickly, agreeing- yeah

ARADIA: me too

ARADIA: we will wait together

JOHN: -hugs her tighter for a moment.-

JOHN: i still think...

JOHN: we should have a thing for her.

JOHN: she saved everybody, you know.

ARADIA: i think so too

ARADIA: maybe we can plan something together

JOHN: -looks at her and nods.- i wouldn't want to do it unless you agreed.

ARADIA: itll be something she would love

JOHN: well, neither of us are working right now.

JOHN: so we have time to plan it out.

JOHN: ...you wanna go lay down?

ARADIA: -she nods, sliding carefully off of him- yeah

ARADIA: makes no difference to ananya but it sounds good to me

JOHN: imma just

JOHN: steal your baby.

JOHN: -holds her to his chest and floats himself flat onto the bed.-

ARADIA: -ananya is so comfortable against john that she doesn't even move. aradia smiles and climbs on top of the bed, reaching for the covers so she can pull them over all three of them- there we go

JOHN: -pauses-

JOHN: just sleep okay?

JOHN: just for tonight?

JOHN: -looks at her with a hint of desperation-

ARADIA: -she turns her head to look at him and nods sincerely- i cant stop when i go there but

ARADIA: ill find a place to rest

ARADIA: just for tonight

JOHN: you promise?

ARADIA: -she scoots closer to him so their shoulders are touching- i promise

JOHN: -he sighs. there's nothing to do but trust her.-

JOHN: okay.

JOHN: you know...feferi wouldn't forgive me if i let you hurt yourself.

ARADIA: i know

ARADIA: everything youre doing is for me and for feferi

ARADIA: i understand now

JOHN: heheh, i guess my repeating it over and over again helped get that across.

JOHN: ...i'm just a fussy sad little bald guy these days.

JOHN: at least til my hair grows back.

ARADIA: -she giggles- i think that look is cute for you -her eyes are a little half lidded-

JOHN: yeah well.

JOHN: goodnight.

JOHN: -he's gonna be a proper gentleman, carefully placing annaya between them and rolling over to face the other way.-

ARADIA: goodnight john

ARADIA: ...and thank you

ARADIA: -her eyes flutter closed-

JOHN: -listens to the sound of her and ananya's breathing until he falls asleep. it's a lot easeir to sleep when someone else is there.-

[cranktankerousgeneticist-blog]

❌for karkat and roxy: john and daelos

KARKAT

John: He’s a stupid, goofy motherfucker that should’ve been more careful but in general he’s just really goddamn silly and an asshole.

Daelos: Some huge sweaty guy. (probably a jackass?)

ROXY

John: She thinks John is pure, her “rude” things are probably censored.

Daelos: (See above ^ )

[taskforcetumut]

ATRIUM SECURITY RECORDING 0426

ROSE: -After a few nights of... strangeness, some things are kind of starting to seep in.  For one, her dreams have become something completely different from what they were, in ways she has a difficult time explaining.- 

ROSE: -For another, she's found herself prone to doing unusual things she has no real explanation for.  Looking in closets she's never bothered with before, rearranging things in storage.- 

ROSE: -She had been leaning into it, early on.  But the thought is far more chilling when she realizes how little time she's spent focusing on anything else.- 

ROSE: -She takes a deep breath, trying to center herself.  focus.  Don't get caught up in these intrusive thoughts.  Intrusive... behaviors.  Just focus.  Exist.  Live right here and right now and in this very location.- 

ROSE: -Baldur is busy toddling under a small tent she set up in the atrium, since he likes it better when there's shade.  She is sitting at a table with a mostly-empty tray, tapping a fork against a plate as she stares at what little is left of her meal.-

RILEY: -she's in the cafeteria, sitting at a table and scooting food around on her plate with a fork but not eating any of it. in fact, you could say she's frowning at it. this has been going on for a while-

ROSE: -She glances over at Riley.  Admittedly, she id not in a very different place, mentally, herself. - 

ROSE: It does not look like you're enjoying that meal very much.

RILEY: -looks over at rose when she speaks up- yeah. i've been feeling sick the past couple of days so i figured i should try eating something. -she shrugs- 

RILEY: but when your stomach is fucked up, nothing sounds good.

ROSE: I recommend hot chicken broth.

ROSE: Sounds unpleasant, regardless.

RILEY: sounds terrible.

JADE: -she's sneaking up on the little tent and having a look at it. it's kind of adorable. also peering around it at Rose and Riley.- :)

RILEY: -spots jade and waves- hey, jade.

JADE: hi!

JADE: is this a little hidey spot here?

RILEY: -looks from the table- kinda looks like it.

ROSE: It's doing a fairly poor job of hideying us, it seems. 

ROSE: Considering how swiftly we've been uncovered. 

ROSE: And there's no reason to insult soup in my presence, Riley.

ROSE: I did nothing to deserve that.

JADE: -gasps- soup???

JADE: where? :p

JADE: im going to argue in its favor anyway

JADE: soup is always... souper

RILEY: nothing against you. soup should just try to taste good specifically when you don't feel like eating. it's gotta make an effort of some kind. instead of just being useless. 

RILEY: no offense.

JOHN: i like the kind with the little star noodles in it, personally. -gUESS WHO'S IN YOUR CONVERSATION NOW. he trot up.-

JADE: alphabet soup!

ROSE: And do you suppose the little noodles have some medicinal properties?

JADE: -she tail wag- they sure do 

JADE: tell them john

RILEY: -oh god that sounds disgusting.- hey john. 

RILEY: can we please talk about something other than food. -in a cafeteria-

JOHN: oh- sure. -scratches under beard.-....uh actually maybe not.  now that you said that all the subjects that come to mind have exclusively to do with food.

JADE: how about puppies?

JADE: thats what i always think about when i dont feel good

RILEY: yeah, that's kind of too much to ask. -she sighs- 

RILEY: ugh, i just wanna fucking eat something. 

RILEY: oh, yeah. let's talk about puppies.

JADE: just think about snuggly puppies squeaking and being soft and cuddly

JADE: wagging their little bitty tails

JOHN: ...damn. -has to sit down for this.-

ROSE: ...Jade. 

ROSE:  Never change.  For the sake of the universe itself.

JOHN: -solemn nod.-

RILEY: -thinks about them and she can picture the fluffiest cutest puppies and how snugly they must be and she doesn't even realize her eyes are watering-

JADE: :)

JADE: -plops down to sit across from Riley when she notices the... tearing up?-

JADE: uh

JADE: (are you okay?)

ROSE: -Slides a little closer, too.  That is.  Conspicuous.-

RILEY: -wipes her eyes because she can't hide it- yeah, just. 

RILEY: thinking about. 

RILEY: puppies. -covers her mouth because her lips start to quiver WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING-

ROSE: ... 

ROSE: You said you've been feeling sick? 

ROSE: ... 

ROSE: And have you been feeling... 

ROSE: Particularly... 

ROSE: Emotional like this?

JADE: ...

RILEY: i'm not emotional just...just think about. like for a second think about. 

RILEY: when they're so little and their heads shake because they can't hold them up right. 

RILEY: and they just are so amazed by everything around them and it's like they have this great perspective on life. like they just find the good in everything and want to spend time with other puppies and humans. -THATS NOT HELPING- 

RILEY: now y'all are gonna cry too because i made you think about that and here i was being considerate.

ROSE: I admit, that's a compelling case you just made.

ROSE: For breaking against the torrent of human emotion. 

ROSE: But I'll try to be strong, here.

JADE: -that is pretty fucking adorable....-

DIRK: -wanders in. hello everybody.- 

DIRK: ... -looks at jade and rose like WHY IS MY MOTHER CRYING-

ROSE: Hello, Dirk.

ROSE: Do you ever take the time to think about when little puppies meet their new siblings?

ROSE: ...Just a thought, here.  Crazy.  No idea why it's sprung to mind.

DIRK: Uh...

DIRK: I can't say that I have ever considered such an oddly specific scenario.

RILEY: you can get me a dog right? a baby one? since you're the captain? 

RILEY: maybe two so one's not alone?

DIRK: ... Will you stop crying if I do? -WHATS HAPPENING-

RILEY: ...maybe...

DIRK: I'll get right on it. 

DIRK: Um. Are you... ok?

RILEY: really? -she looks so grateful- you mean it? you're not just saying that? -wipes her face- i'm fine you just missed me explaining why the puppies are so cute. you would be crying too. you and your dad.

DIRK: I would like to see that, actually. 

DIRK: -she's crying... over puppies... he's very confused.-

ROSE: (:

RILEY: and your brother. everybody.

RILEY: i'm taking one for the team, here. you're fucking welcome.

DIRK: -rose's smiling is creeping him out. he feels like he's missing something here.-

ROSE: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

DIRK: -what the FUCK-

DIRK: -cautiously sits with these ladies...-

RILEY: -wipes her face again- jesus. i'm serious if you don't get me a dog i-- -chokes a little-

DIRK: You're... really serious about getting a dog...?

JADE: -ok now she's kind of muffling laughter behind her hand. HELP???-

JOHN: -people are crying??? he spaced out. he was eating.-

RILEY: why not? people are serious about dogs all the time. -gestures at jade- she's cute as hell and she loves dogs.

JADE: -looks at rose like YOU KNOW WHATS GOING ON HERE TOO DONT YOU.-

JOHN: -distressed-

JADE: i do love dogs!

JADE: its true!

ROSE: That is entirely adequate cause for mutiny.

ROSE: -( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) at jade-

DIRK: -he is completely clueless and remain that way until it's spelled out for him.- 

DIRK: I know, it just... seems a little spontaneous? But I guess I wouldn't actually know.

JADE: -gives dirk a look-

DIRK: -WHAT-

JADE: :)

JADE: :p

JADE: :)

JOHN: -he's so confused too.-

DIRK: -why she blep-

JOHN: -chewing-

RILEY: yeah, you don't know how much i love puppies. but now you do.

JADE: -chinhands-

DIRK: ... 

DIRK: -is he being punked somehow?? what is going on?? please don't do this to him.- 

DIRK: Am I... missing something?

JADE: i think so

JADE: or maybe were all missing something?

ROSE: So, Riley!

ROSE: You've been spending a lot of time with anyone, lately?

DIRK: ???????

RILEY: no. 

RILEY: -glances at rose and squints- what is that supposed to mean?

JADE: i think shes saying that maybe your

JADE: ... stuff going on

JADE: has a reason?

ROSE: Indeed. 

ROSE: You know.  Sudden hormonal differences... 

ROSE: A few weeks of nausea...

JOHN: -eyes widen. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.-

DIRK: -HE STILL DOESN'T UNDERSTAND BECAUSE HE'S COMPLETELY IGNORANT TO THIS OF ALL THINGS-

JOHN: -looks at Rose like SERIOUSLY.-

DIRK: You've been sick?

RILEY: -squints more- who the fuck said a few weeks? -looks at Dirk- just for the past couple of days. on and off. not a big deal.

DIRK: Oh... Ok.

JOHN: well....hey riley maybe you better schedule an appointment with me. just to be safe? -GRINNING AWKWARDLY.-

ROSE: And start acquiring some tiny outfits.

DIRK: ...

DIRK: -OH-

JOHN: -for the puppies! lol lol lol.-

RILEY: ... 

RILEY: -looks between them- y'all are being rude.

DIRK: -screams internally-

RILEY: like. do you do this to anybody else? i don't think so.

JOHN: S-sorry. -looks away. embarassed.-

ROSE: I can think of one other occasion I've done this exact thing.

DIRK: Ok!! Let's stop. 

DIRK: Talking about this. 

DIRK: Forever.

RILEY: -feels bad about John- you're the doctor here. if you wanna see me, fine. prescribe me some nausea and head pills.  whatever. i'm sick of being sick, anyway.

JOHN: we'll talk about it later!JOHN: -time to pay very close attention to his food. he feels bad too for being unprofessional.-

DIRK: -staring at riley, though. now he can't get the thought out of his head...- 

DIRK: Um. 

DIRK: I'm gonna grab some food. Do you want anything else? Or a drink maybe?

RILEY: ugh. no. i don't ever want to eat again. 

 RILEY: -still feels incredibly guilty about John. she will definitely stop by-

DIRK: That's not-- Oh, you're being facetious. Obviously. Ok-- Here I go. -stands up and scurries away-

RILEY: -sighs and looks back at rose and jade- sorry.

JADE: hehe its ok!

JADE: sorry about the teasing

JADE: that is definitely just rose

JADE: (shes a nerd)

RILEY: -smiles a little- it's cool. 

 RILEY: i would offer you guys my food but  it's probably cold.

JADE: i dont really mind that!

JADE: -peeks at it to see what's meatless-

RILEY: -everything. potatoes. crackers. Applesauce-

[gulescamisade]

WELCOME TO EARTH

[ The distant light of Sol-1 finally touches upon the ship, somewhere not too terribly far from earth, as they weave between the debris scattered in the system's asteroid belt. The system appears to be a hotbed of activity, patrolled by at least a dozen ships patrolling its orbit, though the tremendous amount of interference from an approximate fuckton of space rocks seems to be doing an adequate job of masking their approach, for now. The crew is ordered to be ready for the worst, considering the riskiness of their approach, with all of the Security members manning battle stations and engineering on standby for potential damage. There remains a small list of others commanded for presence on the bridge-- Horuss, Equius, Daelos and Roxy-- with special instructions prepared for the moment they manage to clear the asteroid belt. ]

DIRK: -at any moment they could be too close. in fact, they might be already, but who knows how long they can maintain what they're going to do. there's a lot of risks involved, but his gut is telling him now is the moment to give the signal.-

DIRK: -looks to this specialized group of folks.- Alright, guys, time to show us what you've got.

DIRK: If the plan goes awry, we'll just put up the ship's cloak and hope for the best.

DIRK: But it ain't gonna go awry. -he believes in the horses and his platonic wife.-

ROXY: =She made them all shirts, they BETTER be wearing them. A solid blue that reads V-SQUAD with (Not that kind of V) in small letters under it=

ROXY: i got a whole lot u cant handle dstri

ROXY: welcum 2 the sweaty gun show =flexes minorly but yes, time for the one with the void thing. She's sitting and touching the ground since it's a collaborative effort there's no need to go TOO crazy on her own=

TEREZI: V-SQU4D, V-SQU4D, TH3YR3 OUR CL4N 

TEREZI: 1F TH3Y C4NT DO 1T NO ON3 C4N

TEREZI: =moral support=

ROXY: =she loves u Terezi=

TEREZI: >;]

HORUSSBOT: Udder nonsense. I have 100% confidence in my abilities. Nothing will trot off horse. -whirrs, his goggles blaring red. He has had quite some time prepping in the void for a task such as this. Now, it was time to put the thoughts into action into the motion of events.-

HORUSSBOT: -Of course, he can't turn down a gift from Roxy. Horuss is wearing the obligatory V-Squad shirt.-

EQUIUS: -This shirt is stupid and 100di% but it's also kind of cute that Roxy made these. He's focused. He's always focused, standing on the bridge after giving engineering THOROUGH instructions. Jake, do not heck this up.-

JAKE: -vigorous awoos from the engineering labs.-

EQUIUS: D --> We will do as we are needed to. This e%ercise will go off without a hitch

DIRK: -thumbs up at them and their confidence-

DAELOS: - Looking out of place with a t-shirt that's a bit too tight but he's more focused on carefully keeping an eye on the ship than his wardrobe-

JADE: -She's in her station as well, because there's no way she's sitting out on a mission so important, even if she doesn't feel quite as ready as her peers.-

ROXY: =She made it tight on purpose=

ROXY: =ur welc every1=

ROXY: =They're all wearing tight shirts=

ROXY: =Additional ur welcs=

EQUIUS: -He's probably going to flex out of it later-

ROXANNE: -At her station as well, mentally cheering on her daughter. U go bby, she believes in you.-

ROXY: =Feels mom-couragement, internal warmth and weeping=

ROXANNE: -<333-

EQUIUS: -The human disease called love-

[ The ships are still just dim blips on a sensor, and it really seems like they're going to stay that way-- it's a long circuit around the sun and the nearest doesn't seem to be making any move to intercept them. The effects of being under a cloak of void are almost imperceptible to the majority of the crew. ]

ROSE: -There are still a few who'd feel it, though. She's laying her head down and closing her eyes, wincing at even the softest lights in her room. This is not an altogether COMPLETELY pleasant sensation, right now.-

HORUSSBOT: -The void portal device will be running in the engineering labs. Now it is a matter of manipulating the void pocket within outwards. Like a droplet of oil moving through water, so will the ship move undetected through space. Horuss, unlike EVERYONE ELSE, is not distracted in his task of breathing out and letting the Nothing seep from his essence. The edges of his robotic form warble out of the corner of people's eyes. Everything is trotting along as planned.-

DAVE: -he's manning his section of security on the ship, overseeing guards and in ready position should anything go wrong. there's a lot of stuff on his mind about this trip, but he's not focusing on it. he's just making sure he's ready to take action if and when it is needed.-

EQUIUS: -He's barely in focus, unless you are of course focusing on him. Equius settling down to concentrate on his task, positively exuding the void from his entire being. What he lacks in the finesse his teammates have he more than makes up with sheer POWER.-

HORUSSBOT: -Well Horuss is more thorough and studious about it. So there.-

ARADIA: -standing on another level by the atrium, she's just watching. not in caution, but in waiting.-

ROXY: =She's just here to have a good time and be helpful=

EQUIUS: -Shhh fellow horse. You are amazing too. Just not as amazing as me-

MEULIN: -She's there with Dave, smiling supportively every now and again if she catches his gaze, but otherwise remaining serious, bristled with anxiety.-

DAELOS: -In a similar way he also seems to be imperceptible, though in a slightly different way. It's not that it's hard to see him, but people may forget that he's there for a time. He's absorbed in the ship's sensors and radar.-

DAVE: -it makes it easier to be sturdy for someone else, because he can tell meulin is feeling anxious. he gives her a nod when she smiles- nothin to worry about

DAVE: we all know what were supposed to do

DEREK: -he's REALLY counting on y'all for this to work, cuz he'd rather not drive everybody right into danger.-

DAVENFORTH: -Manning his security section, in full uniform. His trench coat flutters gently. But how?-

ROXANNE: -That would be the ideal yeah... But it will work! Optimism is important guys.-

MEULIN: RIGHT! -Except that they're heading into the playground of probably the biggest threat to them currently, and she's sure that before this is done, there's going to be some blood on her claws. Will she be able to handle that when the time comes? The fact that Dave is there, that he's been there every other time she couldn't handle it, is really the only assurance she can cling to for now.-

NEPETA: =She's ready, for the rumblings. Spiny is also ready for the rumblings, pets the lorge lizard=

[ The PLAN continues to go smoothly-- even at a cautious pace, Earth is growing larger and larger, the ship slowly beginning a controlled descent onto the planet. Things seem to be a bit different, with all of the voidiness wrapped around the ship, and any of the heat or pressures of gravity from re-entry seem to slip right by them. From an outside perspective, it would look bizzare, if it were possible for it to look like anything at all. They glide down towards the wider area of the Pacific Northwest, in the direction of a relatively obscure meeting place-- Baseball was both made illegal and cancelled forever, evidently, and it's almost unreal how delapitated the diamond has become, visible from high in the sky, in only a short period of open occupation. ]

RILEY: -she desperately wishes she had something to do at the moment with so much on her mind, so she's walking around the ship instead of sitting and waiting-

QIRIN: =baseball banned?? how awful=

ROXANNE: -Earth wtf.-

DEREK: Damn that was a smooth ride. -grins back at everyone from his pilot's chair.- DIRK: -naturally he believed in them, but damn is he relieved when they start to land. eyeballs the dad.-

VRISKA: -she's looking bored wherever she's supposed to look out for. can't she do something IMPORTANT?! they are absolutely wasting her skills. she sighs dramatically from where she's assigned-

TEREZI: STUNN1NG JOB, STR1D3R SR! 👌

TEREZI: V-SQU4D R31GNS SUPR3M3, 4S USU4L >:]

ROXY: shes sweet talkin me ;P =shes also sweating a bit the ship is fuckin lorge=

TEREZI: M3 SW33T? N3V3R!

JOHN: -BASEBALL WAS BANNED???? THE ALL AMERICAN PASTIME??? THAT BITCH.-

[ There's AMPLE ROOM for a landing, even if it's a severely makeshift spaceport and there isn't too much room for wiggling. They'll also DEFINITELY demolish this whole fuckin thing when they take off again. They touch down on a flat land that is nonetheless a bit overgrown with crabgrass and weeds, sensors reading no ships in the sky anywhere in the surrounding area. There is a definitive ALL CLEAR. ]

QIRIN: =John, it's all the more reason we are here. Fight. Win. Homerun.=

ROXY: =sports=

DAELOS: -Wipes sweat off his brow as they land. That was very stressful.-

DEREK: -touches this baby down nice and gentle...- Well folks we made it. DIRK: -he's already trying to message jamison or jude or whoever will pick up, really.-

HORUSSBOT: -Robo neighs and doesn't sweat at all. The sweat is in his soul.-

JOHN: -whistling Georgia by Ray Charles somewehre in the lwoer decks as they land.-

JAMISON: =They'll be there in two shakes Dirkington! He's brought his various makeshift weapons also!=

JAMES: -Hovering by his Aunt Jolene, most likely. She must be at the ends of her tethers being in Condy territory. Their old home, Earth...-

EQUIUS: -He breathes out deeply. Sweating greatly. He flexes uncomfortably in this cotton prison-

DIRK: -god bless you, jamison harley.- Alright, everybody sit tight. We're gonna make this quick.

DIRK: -gets on the intercom to address security.- Open up the docking bay. They'll be here any minute.

ROXY: =listen she tried to make them super absorbant=

JOHN: -Ooooooooooh he wants out. He feels like a dog getting amped up to go for a walk. He's so overcome with nostalgia that he forgets to be scared.-

DAVE: -he's on it and he'll bring meulin with him-

JOLENE: -most certainly, nephew. just knowing they're near james' house -- the neighborhood where her sister used to live... knowing the state it must be in now. at least she's keeping it under wraps... FOR NOW.-

KARKAT: =surprise it's him not-security-dude=

KANKRI: -From where he is he suddenly gets the feeling that John should calm down.-

DAVENFORTH: -Messages Derek: "Way to not fuck up 👍" -

KARKAT: =hes here to welcome and also punch=

JOHN: -BUT HE'S SO EXCITED.-

DAVE: -you're always secure in my heart karkat-

JAMES: -stern and gentle hand on his Auntie. Please have a cookie.-

MEULIN: -Bright-eyed and bushy-tailed and following Dave! She's trying to make a special effort to be quiet.-

ROSE: -A little bit of a stumbling stagger, squinting at all the lights still, but she's out of her office and TRYING to breathe. It's a really bad time to have a whole bunch of migraines, but she'll deal for now.- REDGLARE: -HERE FOR APPEARANCE PURPOSES of course. She's resting on her staff and waiting by the docking bay.-

JOHN: -HE WANTS OFF THE SHIP RIGHT NOW. Hovers near Rose.-

VRISKA: -BOOOOOOOORING-

DEREK: -responds back like Thanks my guy. 👍-

JOLENE: -pets james' hand vigorously... then nibbles a cookie.- :I

ROXANNE: -She is also heading for the docking bay, her services may not be required but do you know how long its been since she has even seen a glimpse of her home planet? Too damn long, she will take what she can get by watching from inside the dockingbay.-

MEULIN: -Watches the docking bay slide open. Exciting...-

DIRK: -NOBODY IS LEAVING THIS SHIP JOHN DON'T SCAMPER OFF-

DIRK: -HE'LL FOOTBALL TACKLE YOU ONTO THIS BASEBALL DIAMOND-

DIRK: -and he'll love it. sports.-

QIRIN: =wrong sport, dirk=

DIRK: -no?-

JOHN: -WHATEVER DIRK, YOU'RE NOT HIS DAD. he's being good for now though and just rocking on his heels.-

QIRIN: =YES=

JOHN: -he's got all the medical equipment you could ever want ready in his sylladex.-

RILEY: -this is hells of nervewracking. she didn't think she would be nervous, but here she is, waiting outside the docking bay behind everyone else. she just wants to make sure she's alive and breathing, then she can leave her alone for a little while-

ROSE: -twists the cap off an aspirin bottle, spilling a few pills into her palm and swallowing them dry.-

DIRK: -makes his way to the docking bay just to see them in and give more direct orders in case SOMETHING goes wrong, which he can't help feeling it will.-

TEREZI: =BLECH=

ROXY: =Is Rose around her? She's gettin EYEBALLED=

QIRIN: =these kids..=

ROSE: -ALMOST CERTAINLY NOt-

JOHN: -Takes a break from being excited about being on a baseball diamond he played at as a kid and HAS A CONCERN AT ROSE.- hey, you ok?

[At first, there's the distant sound of a rumbling engine, but it doesn't stay distant for long. It's getting pretty loud pretty rapidly.]

PENNY: -HERE COMES A CAR, otherwise known as a scuttlebuggy, and there's none other than a feisty redhead behind the wheel. Crammed in the car with her is a few too many people, and on top of it is... well.-

JAMISON: =CAR SURFING, barechested with homemade screw/nail grenanades. A potato-zooka strapped to his back and a modified nail gun in each hand=

ROSE: Yes.

ROSE: In most of the important ways, yes, I am fine.

ROSE: My head is not terribly pleased with me for existing, but we've had these kind of disagreements before.

DIRK: ... -looks into the fucking camera-

JOHN: :/ hey are you sure you're up to this? you should stay behind if you're ill.

DAVE: -wow-

REDGLARE: >;| -AT THIS SIGHT-

JOHN: -gdi-

ROSE: I'm sure.

ROSE: I've been looking forward to this, as twisted as it sounds.

PENNY: -BROOM BROOM I'M IN ME OWN CAR. She doesn't seem to be stopping for anything. She's gonna drive this car right into the docking bay!!!!-

ROSE: I want to meet them.

ROSE: I've been speaking to Jane for some time now.

TESSERACT: =is LORGE DOG=

TESSERACT: =His head is stuck out the window, tongue lolling with a huge doggy grin!=

JUDE: -A VERY FRAZZLED MAN IS IN THE PASSENGER'S SIDE. he's holding on tight to the dashboard while also looking around everywhere. in front of them, behind them-- and when he looks back oh god THEY'RE GOING IN.-

ROXANNE: -Those are some sweet driving skills.-

JAMISON: TALLY-HO! GANG WAY!

DIRK: Jesus Christ--

DIRK: -side steps...-

DIRK: -more crazy ass family-

RILEY: -that's definitely piper driving-

JAKE: - :D from the engineering labs if he were here. It's a family reunion...-

JOHN: -it's a puppy-

REDGLARE: -of course they are. OF COURSE YOU ARE. She's just gonna FLY UP INTO THE AIR-

JOEY: =she's halfway out the same window, just feeling the wind rush through her hair, waving at those they pass by like she's on a parade float=

PENNY: -TIRE SCREECHING as she nyooms this car up into the ship, hitting the brakes so they can avoid running into anything or anyone-

JOLENE: -waddles down here just in time- jamie--! ... JOLENE: >_>

ARADIA: -has been in the air since they landed. she smiles at redglare-

JOHN: -look, more mysterious relatives. he floats up, waving.- hey everybody!!!

ARADIA: -HELLO REDGLARE-

REDGLARE: ... -HI-

REDGLARE: -SHE'S JUST. GONNA LAND NOW THAT THE CAR'S INSIDE-

JAMES: -follows a shade bit more cautiously. Uncle. James disapproves of your shirtlessness. It's indecent.-

JAMISON: HUP! =as the tires screech, flies off into a front flip and STICKS the landing= ..... Would you all like to meet my kids?? :D

MEULIN: (=ﾟ･ﾟ=) ... -jesus-

JUDE: -leaning heavily against the door, he opens it and just.. spills out onto the floor.-

JOHN: -lol-

JAMES: ...OH.

DAVE: -slow claps-

JUDE: -a pile of awkward gangly limbs.-

JOHN: -hovers near Dad- :O

JOEY: =doesnt even bother with the door. She's crawling out!=

TESSERACT: =no me first!=

PENNY: -puts the car in park and turns it off, opening her door up and stepping out so she can flip her hair and huff.- WOOOOO.

JAMISON: Awwww brighten up Jude the Dude! =lifts Jude=

RILEY: -aaaaaaand yep. that's her.-

JUDE: hhhhh... -HOISTED, then looks around wildly. WHO ARE ALL YOU PEOPLE.-

JOEY: =trolls of course! psh!=

ROXANNE: -Your new forever neighbors probably, jude.-

JAMISON: =Also helps Joey out the window= Jojo look!!!!

JUDE: -I WONT HESITATE BITCH-

JOHN: -walks right up without a second thought- hi! i'm john! can i pet your pupper?

JOEY: aunt jo!! :'D

JAMES: -Kind of just stern, silent, and shiny eyed. ;__; Don't mind him. These were just family members James was sure were lost in the war decades ago.-

JANE: -She's squished in with a dog in the back seat, and she finally manages to crack a door open and step out, looking a fair bit disgruntled. Hello, she's a familiar face...-

TESSERACT: =tackles john right to the floor, licking his face in slobbery kisses=

JOLENE: -HOBBLES OVER TO THE FAMILY- joey!! jude!! -crashes into the lot of them with a big hug-

JAMISON: =Hauls around Jane too, ALL THESE KIDS=

JOHN: -YESSSSSS. Much hoo haing and petting as his face is kissed.-

ROXANNE: -Oh wait is james okay, shes gonna be looking at him with his misty eye thing happening.-

DAVE: -none of their family's reunions were ever anything like this. it's so...happy. and welcomed.-

PENNY: -grinning a little at the family reunions... her eyes aren't wandering.-

JOEY: =just hugging her auntie so tightly!!!=

JANE: Oof--!?

JAMISON: =THAT'S HOW J'S DO IT=

JANE: HELLO!

JANE: Everyone!

TESSERACT: =YES, this boy likes the john human.= TESSERACT: BORF!

JOHN: aww he's so friendly! -PAT PAT PAT PAT-

JANE: Oughtn't we shut the-- door?

JAMES: -Don't look at him... But yes do. He maintains that polite distance.- JAMES: -He is also very ? about the very familiar shape of Jane in the group.-

JAMES: JANEWAY? IS THAT YOU?

TESSERACT: BORF BORF BORF!! =dancing around john=

JANE: ...

JANE: -freezes in place- ...Dad?

JOHN: -STARES AT ALL THESE...COUSINS? SIBLINGS? VAGUE FAMILY MEMBERS CURIOUSLY. eyes widen particualrily at the jane and dad interaction.-

JOHN: -still papping tesser-

JAMISON: =HE'S YELLING ABOUT BABIES AND JUST TEARS UP ALREADY, YESSS=

RILEY: -she's studying her from a distance, making mental notes of sad observations she'll stow away for later-

PENNY: -leans against her car and just casually lights up a cigarette. Those aren't banned in spaceships, right??-

DAVENFORTH: -Nope-

JAMES: YES. -now striding forward, his uncertainty be damned.- WHAT EVER WERE YOU DOING ON EARTH?

TESSERACT: =lick!=

ROSE: -She's DEFINITELY not at her best, right now, but hopefully it doesn't show at all as she tries to make her way through the group and make it to the face that is familiar. FAMILIAR TWOFOLD because she did see her once over the chat program.-

ROSE: It's—

ROSE: Good to finally meet you.

ROSE: -and then she stops, glancing at James slightly quizically.-

ROSE: I have a suspicion it should be within my nature to comprehend how this is supposed to work, and far be it for me to sully this occasion,

ROSE: But is your name sincerely Janeway? You ought to have disclosed you were named after a Star Trek character.

DIRK: -in the process of closing the hatch. it's all good.-

DAVE: -hey, that one redhead looks weirdly kind of like his mom-

JOHN: -goddamnit dad.. he laughs at that.-

JAMES: -Arguably one of the best of the series... but he digresses. Just ask what John's middle name is. Do it. It's Tiberius.-

JOHN: -Well.-

JANE: I—

JANE: -She glances at Rose, laughing incredulously, and back at who she is pretty sure is her father, eyes stinging.-

JOEY: =she wandered over to Tessie and this guy who looks strangely family.=

JOEY: hehehe hi im joey =Holds out a hand to shake=

JOEY: tesseracts a bit excitable

JOEY: sorry he squished ya

JUDE: -he's happy somewhere under all this crippling anxiety-

JOEY: =bro no=

JOHN: hey! i'm assuming we're related in some way but i don't know how yet. nice to meet you anyway though!

JAMES: THIS IS OVERWHELMING. -No... don't cry. He offers a hand out to her.- JANE.

JADE: -She's made it down here, too, tail wagging and peering around bodies to try to figure out what's going on.- hey!!

JOHN: -fist bump.-

JAMISON: =will a hairy dad smoooch do him well, hes getting one=

JOEY: =Snrk= of course JOEY: =BNPS=

DAVE: -there's jade. good. it's kind of cute seeing her so excited about this. it's really cute. he's missed it-

JAMISON: JADE!

JUDE: -HHHH-

JANE: Dad... -just sort of... stops hesitating and rushes over to SQUISH HIM IN A REFRIGERATOR-MANHANDLING HUG.-

JAMISON: COME MEET YOUR BROTHER AND SISTER!

JOEY: family is family :)

JADE: !!

JUDE: -it's her...-

JAMISON: =HE'S smiling SO WIDE, they look a bit like the kids from the photo he showed her=

JADE: oh!!! -BOOF TROTS OVER-

JOEY: =Glances up at that!= o:

JAMISON: =look at this photograph....=

JOHN: -sorry joey he gets distracted for a bit when he sees this. awww.-

JOHN: -he doesn't often see his dad like this.-

JAMES: -Is presumably LIFTED like some fragile case of a refrigerator. Horfs gently and with much indignity.- ... -and then smiles.-

JAMES: -rests a hand into her hair.-

JADE: hi!!! :D

JUDE: ... hello -finally manages to wheeze out-

JANE: -sniffs- You...'ve been here the whole time?

JADE: im jade!

JAMES: I HAVE MADE IT NO SECRET WHERE MY RETIREMENT WOULD LEAD ME, JANE. -He is confused... by happy. But concerned.- SURELY, YOU WERE AWARE.

JUDE: jude

JUDE: harley

JUDE: ... an unnecessary nugget of information to share but there it is

JOHN: -HE JUST FEELS REALLY. EMOTIONAL. This father/daughter thing in his peripheral and the fact that they just landed in his home town.-

JAMES: -putting arms around her now to lift her too.- EVERYTHING IS ALRIGHT NOW.

ROXANNE: -Shes kind of creeping from the back but she can't help but be in awe at James being so highly emotional. Not that its unwarranted, that is his kid after all. But ahhh this is what a real family reunion should look like and its beautiful to watch unfold.-

JADE: i was a harley too! but now im a strider

JAMISON: =...right that=

JADE: i guess i never really stopped being a harley though :p

JAMISON: Aww well you're still a harley!! :D YES

JOHN: -clears is throat- so uh. sorry. joey. nice to meet you and everything. wait...i already said that. pfft. i am a little bit flustered!

JADE: haha!

RILEY: -what's up roxanne i'm back here too-

ROXANNE: -Please no.-

JOEY: wow.... :D so were related to striders now? who are the striders? where are they?

ROXANNE: -Except she will glance at Riley like "You seeing this amazing shit?"-

JANE: ...Dad, no, I... -pulls away from him a little to look at him- JANE: ...-glances around at Jude, and then Rose.-

JOHN: there's one! -points at dave-

JANE: ...I... no.

JANE: I'm... not from here.

JOHN: and there's one....-points at dirk-

DAVE: -raises hand-

JOHN: and there's one. -points at riley-

DIRK: -waves-

JOHN: they're kind of like roaches.

JOHN: everywhere!

RILEY: -looks back at roxanne like bitch if you knew....-

DIRK: Y'all can't even talk.

ROXANNE: -Good thing she dont.-

DIRK: There's literally a dozen of you right in front of us.

DAVE: we dont even have that many

PENNY: -blowing out clouds of smoke. She'll figure out all this relation stuff later.-

JOHN: well now we have some competition going at least.

JOEY: =glances between Dirk and Riley= all right jade which one did you marry

DIRK: -don't look at me-

JADE: pfff that one!

JADE: -points at Dave-

RILEY: -don't look at me????-

DAVE: -raises his hand again- hey

DIRK: I'm gonna let you guys get back to that. We need to get the hell outta dodge. -absconds for the bridge-

DAELOS: -STANDING UNCOMFORTABLY NEAR THE BACK. WE'RE IN ENEMY TERRITORY. AAAA. HOW ARE THESE HUMANS NOT FREAKING OUT.-

PENNY: yeah thats the pretty one.

JOEY: =waves to dave= hi fam

JAMES: -watches her expression carefully and notes what she says. Taking a small moment to register the information. Plug it into everything he already knew versus everything there was still left to learn.- ... -Takes Jane by the cheeks and smooches the top of her head.- JAMES: THERE WILL BE TIME TO DISCUSS IT.

PENNY: -calls out helpfully-

DIRK: -daelos come with him to the bridge-

DAELOS: -oh yes of course.-

DAVE: -did you just call me pretty-

DAELOS: -follow like a good horse.-

JOHN: you are pretty dave. -MAKES KISSY FACES.-

DAVE: im beautiful shut up

JOHN: hold on a minuite. -pops between jane and dad.- hey! i think i met another version of you but we're sort of unofficially brother and sister so hello again!

JOEY: thats the spirit

JOHN: -he's excited, dancing around the group like Tesseract.-

JUDE: -he wants to correct everyone on how they're related exactly... so badly... he has a chart-

RILEY: -crosses her arms, finding the nervousness quickly shifting into some kind of sickening bitter sadness.-

JOHN: -MAKE SHIRTS!!!-

JANE: ...Yes. There will be.

JANE: -she pulls back, looking at John and Dad, but her expression has lost quite a bit of its mirth as she refocuses on John-

JANE: I'm afraid we won't have as much time.

EQUIUS: -Messaging Jake: D --> It my understanding that this is your relation we have acquired. You have my e%press permission to greet them-

JOHN: -blinks- huh?

JOEY: ?

JAMES: WHY DO YOU SAY THAT? -He would like to understand you, daughter.-

JADE: -From her spot amongst the fam, she's started growling softly-- and the tone begins to rise.-

JUDE: ... -is she growling???? -

DAVE: -looks concerned over at jade- jade

JAMISON: =Watches this with furrowed brows= .....she's not so territorial... she was excited to see you all... Jade, dear...?

ROSE: -She frowns, reaching for Jane's shoulder.- ...I... understand if this is a bit much and you need some air.

JOEY: =laughs a little nervously=

JOEY: hey...

JOEY: you okay there?

JOHN: oh yeah! don't feel pressured to mix right off the bat. i'll withold my hugs if you want.

JUDE: -territorial????? iS SHE PART DOG NOW??? guess that would explain the ears- uh

JANE: -She reaches into her sylladex, daintily extracting a bright red tiara and placing it atop her head.-

JANE: I'm sorry, Rose. But also, not really.

ARADIA: -not surprised. just watching-

JADE: -Silence. And then,- B͖̞̞̩̫̦̬̀A̳̟̬͚̝̣͔͡R̡̻K̫̪̮̘

JOHN: uh...

JOEY: 8(

JAMES: - ? Stern fatherly concern.-

ROSE: -WINCE. Some people here have PERSISTENT MIGRAINES, JADE.-

JUDE: -looks between jade and jane and his stomach just drops-

JAMISON: !!

JAMISON: Jade? =Why does he feel the strong urge to chokehold his own daughter??=

JAMISON: =Tries to pat her arm...??=

DAVE: -furrows his eyebrows cuz that sounded funny. it's only natural that he go to her. something was really wrong- yo jade

JAMISON: =THERE THERE???=

RILEY: -UH?????-

JOHN: -looks back and forth between jade and jane, with a growing sense of unease.-

JOEY: =her first instinct is to glance over at Jude and the look on his face begins to damage her calm=

JUDE: dad, don't!

JUDE: everyone stay away from them!! -PANICKING. MIGHT VERY WELL PULL A PIECE OUT ON HIS HALF SISTER.-

TESSERACT: =actually WHINES and begins to back away=

TESSERACT: =tail is now tucked between his legs=

JAMISON: =FOR ONCE ABOUT GUNS= Whoa there... jude? Jude no... are... what are you... =Looks back at Jade=

JADE: -She looks up, ears twitching, and her entire body now is sparking -- not unlike before, but ten times more powerful, enough to raise the hairs of anyone around her. She snaps her head to Jude when he cries out, reaching out a hand, and there's a powerful surge of energy that suddenly seems to swallow them up.-

JAMISON: WHAT THE FRIG-CRIMINY FUDGE BASKET!?!?? =Tries to huddle the childrens protectively from..... the child....singular????=

JAMES: -Oh jiminy no. Whatever this terrible energy is, James is attempting to shield John and Jane from it. Regardless of anything else.-

JOEY: =tries jumping in front of her brother because that's HER BROTHER=

DAVE: -tries to yell as she does that- JADE

JADE: -Any attempts they make to hide are, unfortunately, in vain. One after another, everyone finds themselves vaulted through space in a flash of blinding green and warping surroundings, all very disorienting until almost everyone on the ship is elsewhere.-

ROXY: =Rude....=

ROXANNE: -Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm fuck-

JOEY: =instinctively grabs Jude's hand=

JOHN: - Manages you yell- dad!!! and that's all he gets to do before he's swept away who knows where. -

TEREZI: =she was still on the bridge at the time and yes...yes it was super disorienting. Thank you Jade.=

REDGLARE: -She's in the process of attacking when she disappears. She doesn't have long at all-- maybe she'd hesitate, plead, try something else if she were in a different state, but it already seems hopeless. Dangerous. She disappears before she can get close enough to attack Jade. She'll have to unpack the consequences of that impulse another day, it seems.-

[effluentbalatron-blog]

-- gunhardyTemerity [GT] began pestering effluentBalatron [EB] at 22:51 -- GT: Well howdy doodle egberto. GT: Have you got a moment for a chat chap? EB: hey jake. EB: i have all the time in the world as of right now. GT: Oh you do? Thats swell! GT: I guess youre settling nicely at your old house? GT: Be sure to send photos yeah? Id love to see the home of the legend that started it all. EB: sure. i can do that. GT: Not right away of course... when youre doing better and all! EB: i think i can manage to take some comm pictures of a few (relatively) benevolent harlequins. GT: OH BOY. GT: (Relative) benevolent harlequins are my very favorite kind! :D EB: *doctor jingles.png.* EB: *whistles the clown.png.* EB: i hope that tickles your fancy, my dude. EB: it was never really my thing but they're alright i guess. EB: *a whole lot of fucking figurines.jpg.* GT: Hah! Hahaha! OH MAN. GT: I love this whimsical collection of fellows! GT: Theyre so cheerful and full of good spirits! GT: Its men like these that id like to have at a party im not sure about you. EB: pfft. what a party that would be. you, my dad and a bunch of "funny men" as he'd call them. GT: Thats a keeper. Hehehehe! GT: But where would you be? EB: i think i'd skip it. no offense. GT: Even if i were there? Id be sure to make it fun for the two of us bro. GT: Do you trust me or do you trust me?? EB: jesus, dude. i'd have to be a heartless monster to say no to that. GT: HEAR HEAR. GT: So... GT: How are things in the homefront? Anything like you remember? EB: not much changes in this part of the world, jakey. and i like it that way. EB: it's good. it's safe. EB: cold as balls. EB: roxy cleaned the place up pretty good. she's been helping me out. EB: is ruleus ok? GT: Ru the man us has really taken to his own here! I mean... hes sort of claimed our room as his new territory and it certainly doesnt help that citrins gone and supported his new authority. GT: He sure likes the twins though! Who would have thought? EB: oh. i'm glad it's working out. EB: i've been trying to teach him about gentle touches. GT: He sure likes to teach citrin all he knows! EB: hehe. they're such cute lil buddies. GT: Needless to say hes a cutie pie... and youre doing a great job. EB: thanks but EB: i dunno. EB: i freaked out and left him there. i know he's fine with you guys. and probably doesn't even notice but. EB: well. i know. GT: Hey now... GT: It doesnt seem like the effort matters much but. Rest assured. GT: Its something that looks entirely different from his perspective. GT: Hes just a kiddo after all. And youre being a good daddy not showing him anything but the love. EB: i hope that's how he sees it. GT: One day hell understand but until then? Youre only human john bomb. The best kind of human being there is! EB: i don't see how you can actually think that. EB: ugh. sorry. EB: you're just trying to help. GT: Dont be sorry broseph. GT: I... GT: Well. GT: :( GT: I think about sollux quite a lot. GT: If i werent some bumbling oaf with a wasteful of magic power maybe hed still be here. EB: i mean. of course you think about him. EB: he was special to you. and it hasn't been that long. EB: not that it really matters how long it's been either. EB: and...another thing. EB: this magic stuff is a bunch of bullshit! EB: they didn't teach us how to use it or anything. it doesn't matter how powerful we are if we don't know what to do. or when to do it. EB: how are you supposed to know? how am i supposed to know? GT: Well... GT: Its just... GT: Im awful sorry john. If i knew the answer or what to say i would sure try to say it. GT: But ive been so lost and frankly befuddled with how convoluted this magic business is. GT: I think i have been since the beginning. GT: And... im sorry for how complicated it makes things. EB: no, jake. don't be sorry. i just. i was trying to say that... EB: i don't even know. i just feel really angry about it all. and i'm just as confused as you are. GT: Thats alright bub. GT: For what its worth i... know youre trying your best. And i fully believe youre a good person coming out of all of this. GT: If you have your flaws and all... so what? So long as you try to do the right thing in the end? EB: i'm grateful that you think that. and i mean. i'm grateful people are still on my side and stuff. you, and roxy. and kankri. and dad. EB: but at the same time. it's like. EB: i don't know if i actually can. to be honest, dude. EB: ever since i got on the ship i never actually wanted to leave. no matter what terrible shit would happen, i never thought i'd take ruleus and cut out. EB:  even when feferi died. EB: but now i am thinking about it. a lot. even though i am really trying not to. EB: i don't wanna go back to the ship. or be the doctor anymore. GT: And... GT: Whats wrong with all that? EB: what do you mean? GT: You know id still love and respect the hell out of you bro? Even if you did drop and call it quits. EB: but it's a fucking terrible thing to think about. i already promised i'd try to keep everyone safe. after everything everyone has been through, after the sacrifices everybody made. and the people that have died fighting in the war? GT: I... GT: I know. GT: I felt this way too when uhm. GT: I thought of the possibility that dirk wouldnt wake up. EB: oh. GT: It was just me citrin and the twins i felt. What... what was i going to do? What was i good for? EB: aw jake...:( EB: that's different, buddy. your situation is differnet. GT: I couldnt pull it together. I couldnt be someone the world counted on! But... GT: Why was any of this worth sacrificing my kiddies without their dads? I... I was them. EB: i'd never judge you for that. GT: I was the one growing up on my lonesome and wondering what it is that was so terrible about myself... that i felt... GT: Maybe i wasnt enough to keep my grandma with me. It was an atrocious feeling! It still is! GT: So no!!! I dont think theres anything wrong with letting yourself feel this sort of hullabaloo weakness! EB: i'm confused as hell about how i feel. EB: but i can see what you mean. i think...coming from you it's easier. EB: i'm not saying i am actually going to quit. but. GT: Aw buddy... It just... GT: I understand. It just... feels as though it stops being about you and what you want. Mayhaps its easier to focus on what someone who needs you wants instead. EB: mayhaps. EB: thanks jake. GT: I love you! EB: i love you too, bro. GT: I wish i could swoop the hell in and scoop you in a big ole hug! GT: Id spend the night with you easily. :( EB: hehe i miss our movie nights. EB: though i wouldn't mind if the entire dirkjake clan plus ruleus descended on my dad's poor house. EB: it's fun to think about anyway. GT: Whos to say they wont??? I reckon the whole clan ought to travel around and see the sights! EB: who wouldn't want to see snowy picturesque maple valley wa. we have skating. beavers. and old people riding street legal snow blowers. GT: Sounds like a dream! EB: we also now have roxy lalonde. GT: You mean she was missing before? GT: PSHHAW. EB: i'm really confused now. do you know something i don't. GT: Roxyandra Lalonde is a key ingredient to any party gathering! EB: that i agree with. EB: you know who else we can add to the mix. EB: kankri! EB: your favorite. GT: Oh... EB: pff. GT: Yeah sure buddy! Whatever youd like! EB: hahahaha. GT: ;D EB: why are you winking. what's with the wink. GT: I made you laugh my bucko! EB: oh. EB: that was decidedly unrancorous of me, huh? GT: HUH HUH. I guess youre diddly damn so its unrancorous! EB: /rolls my goddamn eyes/ EB: okay. it's time for john to get some sleep. GT: You mean resting your handsome big pearly blues? You gotcha! GT: Ive got kiddies to systematically put to beddy bye now. GT: Youll be alright bro? EB: i honestly have no idea. but. i feel a little more hopeful about it now. EB: that's something i guess. EB: nah, not "i guess". it is something. GT: *Sniffle.* EB: don't cry. GT: I cant help it. D'8 EB: you big hairy baby. GT: I just miss you to pieces!!!!! EB: i hope you legitimately cry in front of dirk so he feels pressured to bring you here. GT: Dont say that because ill be tempted! GT: Dammit john. GT: Hit the hay would you?? EB: :) EB: ok. goodnight. EB: tell ruleus....nothing i guess because i don't want him to feel weird but. think "john misses you" loudly at him. -- effluentBalatron [EB] ceased pestering gunhardyTemerity [GT] at 01:00 --

[gynecic-arbitrator]

-- effluentBalatron [EB] began pestering gynecicArbitrator [GA] at 19:41 --

EB: hey there miss maryam!

EB: miss merry yams.

EB: hehehehe

GA: Well, hello+ there, Jo+hn.

GA: To+ what do+ I o+we the pleasure?

EB: i think this is the first time i have ever pestered you. crazy right? considering how long both of us have been on the ship and that you work in my department and all.

EB: but better late than never!

EB: well, i heard from a reliable source that you're going to be in jake english's wedding party. :o

GA: Yo+u heard co+rrectly.

GA: Yo+u are to+o+, right?

EB: that's right! i guess i am sort of his best man? it's not really a traditional human wedding but i think that's the closest aproximmation!

EB: anyways, i have the responsibility of planning his bachelor party and i was wondering if you wanted to help me out with it.

GA: I wo+uld lo+ve to+ help. Especially after what happened the o+ther day at the bail bo+nds o+ffice, I co+uld really use so+mething lighthearted to+ fo+cus my energy o+n.

EB: that was some horse shit, wasn't it?

EB: i completel forgot that you were in a relationship with damara. my apologies. :/

GA: Thanks.

GA: It'll be alright.

EB: i hope so too!

EB: and as far as this party goes i think we are apt to knock it out of the park.

EB: i think i know what jake likes pretty well. but i have never thrown a bachelor party before. have you?

GA: Yeah. I threw Eridan's. And I've planned a few parties in the past.

EB: oh yeah, that's right.

GA: Kno+wing what Jake likes is basically all yo+u need to+ kno+w. That gives yo+u an idea fo+r either a theme, o+r so+me fo+rm o+f entertainment.

GA: But o+therwise, parties are pretty self sustaining. All yo+u need to+ do+ is put peo+ple in the same space, get them vibing with so+me go+o+d atmo+sphere and plenty o+f refreshments.

GA: No+t to+ mentio+n, I'm sure Jake will have a go+o+d time no+ matter what.

EB: that's true! he is a pretty easy guy to please, haha.

EB: we could probably have the whole thing in my bathroom ballpit, with one bottle of whiskey and he'd have a grand old time.

EB: but i don't wanna do that. like you said, it needs to scream "jake english".

EB: which means it's probably going to be nuts.

GA: Yeah. That so+unds like the appro+priate way to+ describe it.

GA: Tell me abo+ut his interests, tho+ugh.

EB: hmmmm.

GA: I kno+w he likes mo+vies.

EB: oh yeah, yeah, the guy is crazy about movies! and he owns basically every movie known to man, troll and even some carapacians.

EB: i think his favorites are like super adrenaline packed action type things, sci-fi and comedies. but i know he likes everything

EB: and he's also really super rough and tumble, so i think games of some sort are a must.

EB: lots of food...meat....strong drinks....

GA: Ah, yeah. That so+unds like a bachelo+r party, alright.

EB: well, good!

EB: what do you think about having a barbeque?

EB: it might be easier to play games if we are outdoors.

GA: Yeah. It'd be helpful if we knew whether we were go+ing to+ be o+n land o+r no+t.

GA: Because so+mething o+utdo+o+rsy so+unds perfect.

GA: A barbeque wo+uld be great. Maybe even camping?

EB: ooooh yeah!

EB: i think he'd love camping. i mean he basically used to live in the jungle like tarzan. i think.

EB: damn, that is perfect. i don't know when we're leaving lomat though.

GA: Yeah. I'm no+t sure either. Or even when they're having the wedding.

EB: yeah that might be...valuable information for me to have on hand now that i think about it. haha....

GA: Just maybe.

GA: I have my dress so+ I'm go+o+d to+ go+.

EB: oh...

EB: well dirk told me not to worry about that part, at least.

EB: he said he got it covered.

GA: That so+unds like him.

GA: I did co+o+rdinate with him fo+r my o+utfit. He's go+t everything figured o+ut, it wo+uld seem.

GA: I can't say I'm surprised. I'm just no+t sure where he finds the time.

EB: oh man, i know right? i'd be surprised if he wasn't talking about seating arangements in his sleep.

EB: but i guess that's just how he shows he cares! :)

EB: what do you think of weddings, porrim? i mean in general.

GA: Generally speaking, I think they're nice.

GA: So+me o+f the traditio+ns they're ro+o+ted in leave a lo+t to+ be desired, as are the cultural expectatio+ns placed o+n humans, in particular human wo+men, to+ get married.

GA: But I can be a ro+mantic, to+o+. I can get behind the co+ncept o+f co+mmitting to+ so+meo+ne and declaring yo+ur lo+ve fo+r them in fro+nt o+f yo+ur family and friends. It's sweet.

-- effluentBalatron [EB] is now an idle chum! --

EB: wow. you seem to know a lot about human uh, culture and stuff.

EB: sounds like one of my college classes. can't exactly say which one.

GA: I spent a lo+t o+f time o+n Earth. And Befo+rus, which is heavily influenced by human culture.

GA: Well... was.

EB: oh, cool. that makes snese.

EB: i haven't really met any trolls who have ever been to earth.

EB: i mean, i saw some trolls on earth.

EB: i actually did my thesis on xenobiology.

GA: Oh yeah?

EB: yup! which has come in handy on the ship, obviously. lol.

GA: Thank go+o+dness fo+r that.

GA: As much as I liked Earth, it really wasn't the best place to+ be a tro+ll.

EB: why not?

GA: Tro+lls faced a lo+t o+f prejudice fo+llo+wing that big war, even if that was nearly 15 years passed when I mo+ved there. A lo+t o+f it was institutio+nalized, due to+ precautio+nary measures set in place during the war.

GA: I tried getting an educatio+n, but it wasn't easy fo+r me. I ended up dro+pping o+ut.

EB: it's my first time hearing that side of the story. but i am not really surprised either.

EB: even to me, stuff seemed paranoid and guarded in a lot of places. and then most of the areas i traveled to in the corps were too worried about surviving to think about trolls.

EB: i think things would be different now though.

EB: considering.

GA: Yo+u really think so+?

EB: well, i think people would be a lot more worried about trolls, yeah. haha.

EB: i can't imagine it's good for the trolls that were already there either, though.

EB: this war isn't good for anybody. it just sucks balls all around.

GA: Definitely no+t. I've just been... wo+rried o+ur relatio+nship with humans will be exacerbated since Euro+pa attacked Earth.

GA: But the wo+rst thing abo+ut all this is what a mess it is. I can hardly keep track o+f who+ is even fighting against who+.

EB: well, you're not alone in feeling that way.

EB: at least as far as both our jobs are concerned, it doesn't matter as much. wherever we are, we just help as many people as we can.

GA: Yeah... I guess so+.

GA: I wish I co+uld do+ mo+re, tho+ugh.

EB: really?

EB: well, what would you like to do?

GA: I... Hmm.

GA: I've tho+ught abo+ut helping with therapy.

GA: I figured that's my best bet, anyway.

EB: how come you didn't say anything during the meeting?

GA: I do+n't kno+w. I've had a lo+t o+n my mind, I guess.

EB: well, fair enough. there's a lot of things we could find for you to do around here.

EB: now that i'm in charge i wanna make sure that everybody is using their skills as much as possible, you know?

GA: Yeah. That makes sense.

GA: I'm definitely willing to+ try new things, if it means I get to+ help.

EB: hmmmm.

EB: why don't we meet up sometime soon and you can tell me more about the stuff you're good at, and the stuff you'd like to do?

EB: that way you get some time to think about it. and i get time to hassle dirk for details about the wedding, lol.

GA: So+unds like a plan.

EB: okay. i'll be seeing you. :)

GA: Yo+u to+o+, Jo+hn. Take care.

-- gynecicArbitrator [GA] ceased pestering effluentBalatron [EB] at 22:45 --

[adiostauromachy]

-- adiosTauromachy [AT] began trolling effluentBalatron [EB] at 05:45 --

AT: hI JOHN,

AT: i WAS WONDERING, tHAT IF YOU HAVE A MOMENT,

AT: iF i COULD HAVE THAT,

AT: fROM YOU,

EB: you can have several of my moments, buddy!

EB: :D

AT: tHAT IS QUITE A LOT, oF VERY VALUABLE MOMENTS,

AT: tHAT ARE ALSO PRECIOUS,

AT: sINCE THEY ARE FROM A BRO,

AT: sO THANK YOU, fOR GIVING ME THEM, oUT OF THE BLUE,

EB: not at all, my man.

EB: how have you been?

AT: aBOUT MY OWN BEING, iT HAS BEEN, i GUESS, uH,

AT: fUNCTIONAL,

AT: wHICH IS, nOT TOO SHABBY GIVEN MANY CIRCUMSTANCES, tHAT WE FACE,

AT: wHAT ABOUT YOU, aND YOUR BEINGS OF THINGS,

EB: i'm glad you're holding it together at least. i have a feeling we're about to jump back into the fray!

EB: i am...kind of bewildered honestly!

AT: i FIGURE THE SAME, i MEAN, fEELINGWISE, aBOUT THE FRAY AND THE JUMPING,

AT: bUT ALSO THE BEWILDEREDNESS, bECAUSE, a LOT HAS HAPPENED,

AT: iF THOSE THINGS, uHH, iS WHAT IT IS ABOUT THAT IS,

EB: uh, well not really. i'm feeling bewildered about something else that happend just a second ago.

EB: not that the other stuff isn't worth feeling bewildered over.

AT: oH,

AT: iS THAT BEWILDERING THING, sOMETHING YOU WOULD WANT TO TALK ABOUT TO ME ABOUT,

AT: iN AN ATTEMPT TO MAKE IT,

AT: uH,

AT: uNWILDERED?

EB: well!

EB: sure!

EB: i think i just got promited to head medical director.

AT: rEALLY,

AT: tHEN i SHOULD BE SAYING CONGRATULATIONS!

AT: bECAUSE THAT IS, rEALLY INCREDIBLE,

AT: uHH,

AT: eVEN IF YOU'RE NOT SOUNDING,

AT: vERY SURE,

EB: um, well. i accepted.

EB: so i guess it is sure.

EB: it's just surprising!

AT: wHILE THAT, iT IS A SURPRISE TO YOU,

AT: i DON'T PERSONALLY, fIND IT VERY MUCH SO,

AT: bECAUSE YOU ARE REALLY GREAT AT YOUR JOB,

AT: sO A PROMOTION IS ONLY NATURAL,

AT: fOR SOMEONE THAT GOOD, }:)

EB: heheheh! wow dude. you're gonna make me blush!

EB: or at least you would if i did that sort of thing.

AT: tHEN, wITH THAT BEING THE CASE THEN i MUST NOT, hAVE DONE A VERY GOOD JOB,

AT: wITH THE COMPLIMENTS, dIRECTED AT YOU,

AT: bECAUSE BLUSHING, aND GOOD FEELINGS, iS WHAT THEY SHOULD CONVEY,

AT: oR UH, mAKE HAPPEN, i MEAN,

EB: some people do their blushing on the inside!

EB: so i wouldn't worry!

EB: lol!

AT: oH, tHEN i WILL RETRACT ALL STATEMENTS, tHAT i HAVE BEEN MAKING, aBOUT THAT,

AT: eHEHE,

AT: bUT SERIOUSLY, i AM REALLY HAPPY FOR YOU, tHAT'S AMAZING,

EB: thanks! i think i'm pretty happy about it too, beyond the bewilderment.

EB: i'm not worried about being able to do the job or anything.

AT: tHAT IS VERY GOOD, tHAT YOU ARE NOT HAVING THOSE UNCERTAIN FEELINGS, 

AT: aBOUT YOUR CAPABILITIES, 

AT: bECAUSE THAT IS A THING THAT IS VERY MUCH A QUALITY YOU POSSESS, 

AT: tHAT YOU ARE CAPABLE,

EB: yup. i can't say confidence has ever been an issue for me, haha. but it is still nice to hear.

EB: being in charge is definitely going to be different than anything i've done previously, though!

EB: in fact, there's almost TOO many possibilities!

AT: tHEN, 

 AT: iS THERE MANY PROJECTS THAT YOU HAVE GOING ON, iN YOUR HEAD, tHAT YOU WANT TO DO? 

AT: bECAUSE, iF THERE ARE, aND i ALSO HAVE SOME AT THE SAME TIME,

 AT: tHEN WE COULD PUT OUR HEADS TOGETHER, sO THE POSSIBILITIES WON'T BE TOO OVERWHELMING,

----

[ebironiccrest-blog]

-- effluentBalatron [EB] began trolling ebironicCrest [EC] -- EB: dude, i heard you got into some shit. EB: where are you? EC: shit is usually the best way to describe the shenanigans i get up to EC: im in cooltown bro EC: population me EC: and some EC: peas i guess EC: they could be baby tomatoes EC: or grapes EC: some kind of vine EB: yeah i mean where physically or as physically as you can get, smart ass. EC: where physically is a good question EC: but why it matters is an even better one EB: don't be a dick. just tell me. EB: i'm bringing you a candy gram or something. EC: the amount of dicks i can be at one time is currently immeasurable EC: ask anyone EB: well don't be a dick about this in particular. EC: you really wanna find me EB: i just want to see you. what do i have to do, get a stereo and wander around the ship with a boom box blasting "say anything" by peter gabriel. EC: you come to my house EC: you play peter fucking gabriel over the bread we broke together EC: this day of my daughters fucking christening EC: you got some nerve egchirp EB: egchirp... EB: okay i really wanna push that more. EB: but i still asked you a fucking question. EC: woah no lets take it slow EC: you wanna know im in the EC: ... EC: green room EC: aint really a house EC: theres just uv shit that kind of works for me EB: okay. i'll be there soon. JOHN: *And he is. He isn't sure he can do anything for Davesprite, but he brought his medic case just in...case*. DAVESPRITE: *John pushing into the greenhouse room doesn't do much for Davesprite. He hovers at the center of the room with his back turned to him. Contemplating. Existing. Making a mess of blood all over his front and the neon yellow stained rags littering the ground. The thing about sprites bleeding is the platelets that usually staunch wounds in regular blood are kind of shitty when it comes to their light infused counterparts. They just bleed and the rag pile gets higher. It's a good thing they're resilient as creatures.* JOHN: *He doesn't even pause before closing the distance, carefully putting his emotions away and appearing self assured and calm despite how badly he wants to scream. No, he doesn't know how to help. But hes not going to give up before even looking.* JOHN: hey...can i... JOHN: can i take a look? DAVESPRITE: *That's when John can take a look at Davesprite's face. The shades are missing, revealing a pretty substantial black eye. Then there was the mess that was his nose. Pretty clearly broken and the source of the gold glowing faucet. It spills into his mouth and drips in globs onto his feathers. Slowly Davesprite lowers his claws from his face, eyes downcast.* DAVESPRITE: yeah man *muffles out wetly* DAVESPRITE: go for it JOHN: *John has been pretty emotionally deadened lately- even more than usual. The result of one piece of bad news quickly following another and another, possibly. But this gutted him. It didn't seem to matter that he had only had two conversations with dave sprite, that wasn't how it felt anyway. He steeled himself until he was just as clean and surgical inside as his tools and came close- slowly like he was approaching a kid. It only takes him a few moments in silence before he opens his case with a click.* JOHN: alright bro, let's get you cleaned up. DAVESPRITE: sure *He'll be cooperative and hovers still, letting John fix his broken face.* JOHN: honey mustard stains are tough as shit to get out. *he replaces davesprite's filthy claw with some cotton swabs, just trying to staunch enough of the weird material so he could get a closer look at the break.* DAVESPRITE: scuse you doctor fuck DAVESPRITE: this is lava lamp fun time on my end DAVESPRITE: dude we can start a rave with this shit *But like all blood, the shit does stain. He makes an attempt to clean his claws.* JOHN: just stay still for a sec. *he soothes without even thinking about it. he might as well be on auto pilot right now, except he's focused. he's never worked on a being made of energy before so his mind is working quickly to plug in solutions. how about this? ehhh! wrong. how about this? ehhh wrong. it doesn't look like the wound is going to heal fast enough on it's own. and after a few moments of careful dabbing and swiping and poking around, john is covered in his friend's blood. then something finally clicks.* DAVESPRITE: *It's cool. It'd look a lot worse if it was a red color. The smears increase.* JOHN: *I dunno, the yellow kraft chemical burn color is sorta off putting. But he's not about to say that. His gloved fingers graze over a special pocket in his bag, holding a small surgical hand laser that he scored on a planet sometime back.* JOHN: so i... JOHN: i honestly don't know if this is gonna work. but i don't think it'll hurt you at least. JOHN: *presses on him to lift his head up a little bit*. DAVESPRITE: *obeys... kind of shifting a little in mild panic as the flow starts shifting down his throat rather, cutting off his breathing for a moment. The taste is awful and his pulse races. This is fine.* JOHN: i know. i know it's gross. it's cool, man. we'll clean it. *his tone of voice keeps that cool soothing note. There's a small hum as the laser turns on, and john very carefully aims the beam of light and heat, hoping it'll do what he supposes it will, using his other hand to steady davesprite in the position. what john doesn't know because he's too focused on what he's doing to really notice, a fresh tingly sensation is forming around dave sprite, it pools and ebbs like water, but it's really more like wind. except it's not anything. there's something healing about it, although not exactly in a physical way.* DAVESPRITE: *The cool sensation reaches Davesprite where he needs it the most right now-- clearing out the heavy knot of anxiety and poisonous filth twisting in his chest. It was the feeling of running childhood slashes and scrapes under cold water and bandaging them clean so he could rest. Knowing the day couldn't get any worse from there and finding security in it. It's probably this sensation that brings a new kind of wetness to Davesprite's face, a thinner, more transparent tinge of orange leaking past his closed eyelids as John worked over his face. But he doesn't shudder or shake or do anything else to suggest it was coming from anywhere in particular. If there was anything DS had a hard cap on, it was motor control. He keeps still, the tears still beading out silently.* JOHN: *It john a while to notice the tears, but even when he does he doesn't say anything. He just lets the laser work and occasionally pauses, brings his hands up to realign his nose to the best of his ability. It turns out that light and energy does heal the "flesh of a sprite faster" and soon when he dabs the blood away it isn't replaced by more blood and he knows he's done well. It's a lot to clean though, and he has all the cotton swab, water and rubbing alcohol to do it with. It takes about twenty minutes before the only blood left is on John himself, his tools and the floor.* JOHN: *The effects dave sprite feels spike as John completes his work and then disippate, almost before he notices the presence is gone, but it leaves that tingly clean, serene feeling behind.* DAVESPRITE: *Davesprite felt clean, he felt calmer, but... melancholy. Being conscious of how very rarely he actually felt like this. Even his wings were closer to himself than usual, the kid-like slump in his shoulders prominent.* ... *rubs at his sore, tender middle, the projection of his shirt.* DAVESPRITE: *Without much more of a fuss, he takes that off too so John can have a look angry pooling of darker orange along his rib cage. The marks of hard blows.* JOHN: *John furrows his furry black caterpillar eyebrows when he sees the dark marks. He doesn't know if dave sprite can have broken bones are not, but he does a manual check anyway just to make sure after removing his bloody gloves. Semi subconciously he thought dave sprite felt really interesting, the soft texture of his fingers sliding over feathers and the weird feeling of heat and humming energy. He seemed to have less resistance than more "real" objects somehow, as if gravity were effecting him differently. His ribs weren't broken, just badly bruised. John's first thought was a cold pack, but he quickly switched gears. There was a heat pad for severe abdominal pain lurking in his sylladex, not in his main medical kit. It ran on a charge. He gave the bruises one more once-over, a guilty part of him wanting to look more simply because he had never inspected a sprite at such a close distance. But this was dave, so there was no time to fuck around. After some jostling, John started pressing it lightly to the effected areas, doing this for a little while and then tapping his claw, in case he wanted to take over himself.* DAVESPRITE: *Yeah, he's good with pressing the heat pad onto himself. A textured claw hand comes to hold it in place. Rumbles a thanks under his breath, downy soft feathers fluffing reflexively when John retreated. After a short while, he exhales.* JOHN: *It only takes a short time, but it felt intense for some reason. He channels a bit of wind, about the power of a weak fan to cool himself off. It's hot in here and he's sweating and sticky with weird glowing blood. He takes a moment to at least get it off his skin while dave sprite collects himself.* DAVESPRITE: guess ill stay in here for the night *floats the perimeter of the room. It's really small and dark. Full of small plants and UV lamps. DS found it comforting.* DAVESPRITE: you should take off and find some chill bro JOHN: *He nods and starts packing up his stuff....but after just a minuite or two, he stops.* JOHN: are you sure? JOHN: i could chill here if you want. JOHN: i don't really have ...anywhere to be right now. JOHN: i mean it's up to you but hehe, just throwing that out there. DAVESPRITE: yeah its cool DAVESPRITE: we can hang tomorrow DAVESPRITE: nbd DAVESPRITE: *carefully places sunglasses back onto his face. His shirt back onto his body and his sword back into the sheathe... of his chest.* DAVESPRITE: hmu whenever JOHN: *Watches this with slighty wide eyes. Holy fucking shit. But then he just shrugs, although he doesn't really feel like shrugging. Now that he's not focusing he's starting to get angry again. It's probably best that he goes.* JOHN: okay. well, same here. JOHN: ...sorry this happened to you man. JOHN: this isn't usually..how we do things here. JOHN: it's pretty terrible. DAVESPRITE: *All he does is shrugs, the worst of his feelings about it already cleared away.* thanks man but DAVESPRITE: its cool DAVESPRITE: shit happens DAVESPRITE: cant dwell on it so DAVESPRITE: all i gotta do is deal JOHN: *He knows dave sprite, just like other daves and probably moreso due to weird sci-fi magic schennans is a strider and striders start shit, get into trouble ect. but it doesn't really excuse it in his eyes. Nothing really could. He didn't so much see a bird monster alien thing rn as a baby version of his friend who just got the kicked shit out of him by some creepy crawly old fuck.* JOHN: *He sighs.* JOHN: yeah, okay. JOHN: see you soon. JOHN: *He soon picks up his equipment and leaves, albeit reluctantly.* DAVESPRITE: *And just watches him go, giving his wings an idle stretch behind him.*

[tankedgnostomanic-blog]

-- effluentBalatron [EB] began messaging tankedGnostomanic [TG] at 16:00 --

EB: //boxes your rocks!!//

TG: holy heckalump whats all this unrowdy blueberry bullshit crashin in my textbox?

TG: u really wanna go j boi azure i will take you out

TG: ....to a lovely lunch

TG: and see whats up with all this aggression

EB: you ...azure me you will take me down?

EB: :)

TG: alright nvm the gloves are on

EB: hehheheheh! wait, uncle! uncle!

EB: you wouldn't hit a guy with glasses would you?

TG: he doesnt wear glasses on his ass and seein how thats what im kickin i mean

TG: not seeing the relevance man

EB: i'm working up a good sweat over this now! i mean you've got your finger on the big gun and all.

EB: not to mention the big guns connected to your fingers, like through your arm joints and stuff.

EB: i am just a guy who likes to make jokes. a joke guy if you will.

TG: you sure know how 2 make a gal lay down her arms

EB: HAHA, NICE.

EB: anyways, how are you? i realized it had been a while since we chatted.

TG: ive been alright well actually a whole lot better than when we last talked

TG: so thats a definite improvement

TG: wbu flyers guys making changes one paper at a time?

EB: you did seem a little on edge back then, but i mean...i know the exact reason for that and it totally makes sense.

EB: >:/ and meeting some pretty harsh criticisms on the way.

EB: okay, maybe i need to find a graphic design fellow to take care of that part. haha.

TG: lol maybe juuusst maybe

TG: i wouldnt mind helpin out if those critics dont wanna put up while theyre not shuttin up

EB: dave offered but...i think he'd turn it into a joke and while i am all about jokes as i mentioned before i really do want people to take this seriously, haha.

EB: okay maybe COMPLETE seriousness is way too much to ask for, lmao.

EB: but like a tiny shred of seriousness.

EB: a nugget.

TG: a sliver of srsness

TG: cause it is honestly serious

EB: yeah, i mean ...we're just kind of a floating space town now for a while, and now we have a bunch of kids growing up so even if it doesn't seem like a big deal right now, it is going to be here pretty soon.

EB: we can't have general lawlessness, as much fun as it is.

TG: honestly me and my mom have like a little group type thing that we meet and talk about shit

TG: sometimes pertaining to our probs

TG: so if someone comes in then we could talk to em also

EB: oh, in my meeting iw as gonna look into settng up group therapy.

EB: if you guys already have a little one going, would you mind if we kind of made it official?

TG: nah i dont mind figure i cant make bar smoothies for everyone tho lol i can make it more prefessional like

EB: thanks roxy! that helps a lot actually.

EB: maybe my dad can go to those...

EB: i wish we had more counselers is all.

EB: i'm looking at the schedules and stuff, it's kind of unbalanced, haha.

EB: i don't suppose you can clone some, huh?

TG: well since u asked so nicely how can i say no?

EB: i am kidding please don't do that.

TG: too late

TG: the babies are in the tubes

EB: euuugh.

TG: as much as im makin that joke i dont think those are the best peeps to clone

TG: not like i dont want 1000 rosies but she also might clock me

EB: it gives me the heebie jeebies now, i must admit.

EB: obviously the world is better for me existing.

EB: but i mean, still a bit creepy.

TG: have u talked to anyone about it?

TG: not like its gonna make the vibes go away but still

TG: just to get it all out

EB: oh?

EB: uh.

EB: not really?

EB: maybe a little bit about it with jade.

EB: but it's not really a big deal!

EB: i'm just kind of being silly.

TG: i dont think its silly man its just weird to all of a sudden have something associated with you like that

EB: it's not really....sudden. i mean, i didn't know i was a clone until nightmare on clownstreet but i knew before then that things weren't exactly as i pictured them.

EB: i was kind of just ignoring it and being a baby about it though.

TG: cuz it made you uncomfortable to think about?

EB: it really did, haha. i feel bad for jade. i really put her through the ringer with that stuff.

EB: every time i would find out another new little piece of information i would kind of freak the fuck out, lol.

EB: but i am not being like that anymore because ain't nobody got time for that.

EB: how did we get on this topic anyways? wow. that is a lot of blue text.

TG: lol we got on the topic because you have a lot to stay about it man

TG: which is cool

EB: :P if you say so!

TG: i do say so dorkburger >:P

EB: it's hard to argue with 'dorkburger'.

TG: good! ur not supposed to

EB: oh yeah? well what about you? you didn't really give me the full rundown when i asked you.

EB: what's going on in the world of roxy.

TG: aww i dunno man ive just been doing the regular day to day

TG: peepin on eri and dirk

TG: make sure their ears are clean and not so stressed

TG: cleanin the bar

TG: bein kinda boring i guess lol

EB: it's not boring unless you're bored!

EB: are ya?

TG: eh

TG: ngl yeah

EB: well that's no good. :/

EB: you don't have anything to work on or anything to do for fun/

TG: uh i got my usual shit but i been thinkin about tryin to find something else to do

TG: i been goin to the beach but after that then what right?

EB: hmmm.

EB: well maybe we should hang out sometime while you're looking for something to do.

EB: two knuckleheads are better than one, right?

TG: i like the way u think :) could use an extra dosage of johnny every now and again

EB: have you tried out the VR room yet?

EB: i haven't gotten the oppurtunity. that might be fun.

EB: maybe i'll just camp out and watch you test weapons...haha.

TG: i actually do use it! its the fuckin bomb diggity

TG: we could def take it for a spin sometimes and BOTH test out new weapons

TG: virtual weapons

EB: hell yeah!

EB: it's been a long time since i've thrown my hammer around.

TG: john

TG: jay

TG: jbe

TG: boi blueskiski

TG: i could wink

TG: but thats also a rly sad implication

EB: oh....yeah that's more worthy of a sadface than a wink.

EB: hahahah.

TG: gdi john y you gotta leave me so torn like that

EB: lik dis if you cry everytim

TG: then ur gonna meme on me like some memer

TG: uve clearly been hangin out with the wrong crowds

EB: i'll have you know that i am very discerning about my memes.

TG: clearly by ur usage u got a taste for the vintage memes

TG: and dont get me wrong vintage is always classy

TG: but to meme on me of all peeps??? how dare sir

EB: nobody is safe, roxy. i meme on my own father.

TG: u need 2 be grounded

TG: right now

TG: im sending ur dad a memo

EB: actually please don't do that. there is a very real possibility i will be grounded.

EB: haha! i wish i was kidding.

TG: omfg really?

EB: ...maybe...

TG: big daddy eggs runs a tight ship

EB: tis a blessing and a curse!

TG: mostly a delish blessing

EB: yeah, most people think so. hehe.

TG: i can see why u wouldnt tho lol

TG: im gonna take py to get some lunch tho so ill hafta chat at u about ur stern pops another time

TG: a v easy thing to do tbh

EB: i think 'stern' is a little harsh. more like dignified.

TG: dignifine more like

EB: arrrrrgh. what....

EB: roxy no.

EB: okay, have a good lunch! bye!!!!

TG: lmao

-- tankedGnostomanic [TG] stopped messaging effluentBalatron [EB] at 20:37 –

-- effluentBalatron [EB] began messaging tankedGnostomanic [TG] at 20:37 --

EB: >:/

TG: sorry jb thems be the facts

EB: no!!!

-- effluentBalatron [EB] stopped messaging tankedGnostomanic [TG] at 22:07 -- 

[growinggradience-blog]

📱JOHN

[hey john i know youre probably asleep… im just having trouble with it againnothing new there!! loli know this sounds weird… but do you ever forget growing up?sometimes i feel like i can barely remember how things used to beeven though most of the time we knew each other was talking online and everything, it feels like it was such a long time ago that i have a hard time thinking of what that was even likebut even so… i cant help missing ithow things used to bebeing able to make plans and follow them through and knowing what to expect]20 mins later[sorryim going to try to sleep now <3goodnight john!]