#endos shut the fuck up challenge (impossible)

[shitty-proendo-blackout-posts]

#anti endos shut the fuck up challenge (impossible)

[melon-hellion]

Pairing: Takiishi x Endo x Reader; Hiragi x Reader

Word Count: 2.2k

Note: this is filthy, but it has been living in my head so now I’m putting it in your heads. It’s a wee bit dark.

Warnings: exhibitionism, dub-con bordering on non-con, public humiliation, toxic relationship, non-consensual voyeurism, fingering, coerced cunnilingus, forced orgasms, pussy slapping, fem-bodied reader, reader gets hit once, Takiishi and Endo are just mean and Hiragi is not happy about it, mentioned that reader and Ume grew up together

It’s a power play. Hiragi knows this because he knows them—Takiishi and Endo—but it doesn’t make him any less livid.

He sits next to Umemiya on the couch across from the other 2 men, arms crossed, one leg thrown over the other, and all he can do is scowl, trying to ignore the lewd noises that are filling the room.

It’s more of a warehouse. Abandoned then refurbished to fit the needs of Takiishi and the rest of his gang of god damn degenerates. It’s empty now, save for the 5 of you, which is both a blessing and a curse. At least it affords some semblance of privacy.

“Extend the truce, huh?” Endo asks, leaning back in his seat as he starts tracing fingers up and down your thigh. “Now why would we do that?”

Umemiya is staring directly at his smirking face, his own expression unreadable, shut down, and Hiragi knows why. Umemiya is just as affected by the scene before him, maybe even more so.

Because he’s known you for much longer than Hiragi has, shared toys and meals at the orphanage, looked out for you like he did for Kotoha, but unlike Kotoha, Ume couldn’t keep you tucked under his wing forever.

“Why wouldn’t we?” Umemiya challenges. “We both have better things to worry about than going against each other. It’s been a peaceful few weeks, wouldn’t you agree?”

“Peaceful,” Endo scoffs, “more like boring.”

A muffled moan escapes you, and Hiragi can’t help but glance at you. It’s a mistake.

Takiishi has you in his lap, his spread thighs keeping yours wide open as he plunges long fingers in and out of your wet pussy. You’re completely on display, naked chest rising and falling as if to show off your hardened nipples.

Hiragi licks his lips and immediately hates himself for it.

You don’t want to be doing this, there’s no way. It’s been years since Hiragi’s had a proper conversation with you, always hidden away within Takiishi’s shadow.

This never should have happened to you. You never should have fallen prey to him. Hiragi never should have let you.

You were a shining star to Bofurin, well-liked by everyone. You made sure the boys were taken care of, tended Umemiya’s garden whenever he wasn’t able to for some reason. You even provided a nice buffer between Ume and Hiragi, taking note of his particularly bad stomach days and making sure to tag along with the intention of redirecting Ume’s ridiculous fucking tangents while slipping Hiragi fruity antacids.

Then you were attacked, and for some reason fucking Endo was there and stepped in—saved the day then presented you to Takiishi like some kind of toy he’d won from a claw machine.

And he’s still presenting you, making Hiragi and Umemiya sit and watch as you cum for the who-knows-what-time. It's distracting, impossible to focus on the conversation at hand when your sweat-dampened body is right there, stretched out and leaking. There’s a fucking puddle between Takiishi’s feet, but he doesn’t seem to mind. In fact, he’s barely paying attention to you aside from thrusting his fingers inside you.

Hiragi’s fists clench where no one can see, fighting a growl when Endo dips his own hand between your legs to rub your clit.

“She’s so swollen, Kiishi,” he teases, “just look at her.”

For the first time since pulling you into his lap, Takiishi actually regards you, eyes darting downward, and he swats Endo’s fingers out of the way to make room for his own, toying with your puffy clit only to slap it several times.

Hiragi twitches at the action, watching droplets of your arousal fly from your cunt while you squeal and writhe, and he berates himself for thinking that you look so pretty like this—ready to be devoured.

He could. Devour you, that is. At one point in time Hiragi wanted nothing more than to make you his, consume you in every way possible. But he didn’t out of respect for Ume.

Now he thinks maybe he should have. Maybe being with him could have prevented all of this. Maybe instead of walking alone that night you would have been walking with him, back to his place after a date.

Maybe, maybe, maybe.

Instead he has to watch these psychopaths use you. It’s not even for your pleasure; it’s to set Umemiya and Hiragi on edge, to piss them off enough to start another war.

Takiishi speaks into your ear, your head thrown back as you whimper pleas for him— “c-can’t take it… no—no more, p-please.”

“No more? But your pussy’s so wet. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you like being watched like this.”

Hiragi can barely hear, but he gets enough of it to have to bite his tongue. Umemiya takes advantage of his rivals’ attention being focused elsewhere and squeezes his eyes shut while popping his neck.

“You good?” Hiragi grunts.

Umemiya looks at him from the corner of his eyes, and Hiragi can feel the anger radiating from him. Definitely not good.

“Fuck, you’re makin’ such a mess,” Endo hums, slipping to the ground with the grace of the fucking snake he is so that he can shove his face between your legs.

Loud slurps echo through the warehouse, and the implication that you are that fucking sloppy has Hiragi’s cock twitching in his pants. God, he’s so fucked for this. This is sick.

You whine and wiggle in Takiishi’s lap, legs trembling as Endo eats you out. You’re only given a break when Takiishi shoves Endo’s head back and roughly shoves his own, wet fingers into the other’s mouth.

Endo sucks on them dutifully, even moans around them and reaches down to palm his cock. Hiragi doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to their sordid dynamic, even more twisted now that you’re part of it.

“How about this,” Takiishi starts, removing his fingers from Endo then wiping them down your face. You try to turn your head but the fucker hooks the same, messy fingers into your cheek before gagging you with them.

“I can see the two of you are… uncomfortable.” Takiishi’s mouth barely lifts into a smile, but his eyes remain lifeless as ever. “And I’m enjoying it. So I’ll extend the truce if you humor me for a little bit longer.”

“How? Keep watching you torture my little sister?” Umemiya questions, voice unnervingly even.

Takiishi’s smirk grows. “No. Take part in it.”

“No.”

“Aw, come on,” Endo drawls, “just a taste. You know you want to, Hiragi.”

Hiragi stiffens, eyes darting to you just in time to see yours flutter open and find him. He thinks he sees you nod.

“Don’t you want the truce to last?” Takiishi presses, eyebrows lifted like he’s shocked. “You won’t do this one little thing even if it keeps people safe?”

Umemiya grits his teeth, obviously torn, and Hiragi knows that he’s gonna have to make this decision. This twisted fucking decision.

“You’ll let her rest after?” Hiragi asks, still not moving a muscle.

“Ah!” Endo actually claps, grinning widely. “We have a taker!”

Takiishi shrugs, “sure. Why not?”

Hiragi takes a moment to rub his temples, stomach churning, then looks at Ume for permission. He gives a curt nod, and Hiragi sighs then holds a hand out to beckon you over.

“No, no. On your knees here,” Takiishi commands.

Hiragi’s spine goes rigid. Talk about a fucking power play. They’re putting him in a very vulnerable position.

“We’re not gonna attack you,” Endo chuckles as if reading his mind. “Truce, remember?”

His feet feel like lead as Hiragi makes his way over. He gazes down at you, tries to soften his expression before lowering himself to the ground.

He hates this. He isn’t submitting himself to you but to Takiishi.

Truce, truce, truce, he reminds himself, trying not to think about the fact that he’s finally about to taste you. Enjoying this is not an option. He has to keep his composure.

Hiragi simply stares at first—such a perfect pussy, slick dripping from you in strings, your abused hole leaking thick cream.

Fuck, he’s hard. He’s so fucking hard it hurts.

“Gorgeous, right?” Endo purrs, and when Hiragi doesn’t answer he asks in a much harsher tone, “right?”

“Yeah,” he nods. “Gorgeous.”

Hiragi glances up at you one more time before leaning forward. He licks you as softly as possible, gathering the juice between your folds. It pulls a long moan from you, and Hiragi senses the way you tense in Takiishi’s lap.

You taste good. Better than good. Sweet and tangy, and as you coat his tongue, Hiragi savors it. He tries to remain soft against you, not moving too quickly or forcefully. He can’t imagine how sensitive you must be.

When he bumps his nose against your clit, so pitifully swollen, you let out a high-pitched, “ah!” and buck up against him.

Fucking Christ.

Hiragi places one of his hands on your thigh, kneading your tense muscles in a way he hopes is soothing, but the more you move against his mouth, the tighter his grip becomes.

He drags the flat of his tongue over your hole then dips into it, tasting your gummy walls and groaning quietly. His cock is throbbing, trapped in his pants, but he’d rather die than pull it out.

The slightest graze of his teeth against your clit has you crying out, and Takiishi holds you tighter against him.

“You enjoying this, hm? Our pretty slut getting off on your old friend’s tongue?”

Hiragi growls at the way he degrades you, but his mouth is too busy to argue. Instead, he sucks your clit into his mouth, reveling in the way you start to whine for him.

“You better not cum for him,” Takiishi hisses. Hiragi nearly stops. Isn’t that the whole point of this? Wring one more orgasm out of you?

“B-but—”

You’re quaking, sopping hole clenching over and over, and Hiragi feels a sick pride knowing he’s making you feel good.

“Listen to me,” Takiishi grips your face roughly, “you don’t cum unless I say you can.”

You choke back a sob that morphs into a wet moan when Hiragi licks into you again.

He should stop. Even if you like what he’s doing, Takiishi is still using it as a punishment, and the worst part is that he knows Hiragi is getting caught up in it. He isn’t sure he’d be able to tear himself away if he tried.

And he doesn’t want to try.

Both hands by his head, Hiragi spreads your chubby pussy open and drags his tongue over whatever he can reach. He makes a mess of his face, rubbing back and forth, catching your clit with his nose while slurping the squirt starting to seep out of you.

Takiishi can tell you not to cum all he wants, but Hiragi is gonna make sure you do no matter what.

“Fuck, fuck, Ragi!”

He hasn’t heard you call him that in ages, and it makes heat bloom in his chest, affection and longing, and fuck, he wants to take you away from here, to save you, but first he wants to feel you lose yourself. He wants to swallow your orgasm, fuck you through it, then wipe away your tears afterward.

“Don’t cum, don’t you dare cum,” Takiishi says over and over, noticing how your body starts to lock up, how your legs tighten around Hiragi’s back, toes curling as he swipes his tongue back and forth over your clit.

He’ll make you see stars, and then he’ll steal you away. That’s it. That’s exactly what he’ll do.

“Have to—I can’t—”

Hiragi is so thankful he looks up from between your legs at that moment because you smile when you cum for him, rocking your hips into his face, wanting more. He sticks his tongue out as far as he can, flattening it, letting you rub your messy cunt all over it.

“Oh, god, oh—m’sorry, m’sorry, couldn’t help it, ohhh~”

You slow down, or really Takiishi slows you down, and Endo sneers, pinched expression on his face.

“Alright, loverboy, that’s enough.”

Hiragi glares up at him, making a show of the way he kisses your clit, then leans back on his heels. He doesn’t even bother wiping his face.

You’re breathing heavily, legs still twitching with aftershocks, and when you look up at Hiragi, you show another exhausted, beautiful grin.

The meeting doesn’t last long after that. Takiishi and Endo both seem pissed—their own damn fault—but Hiragi isn’t particularly worried. He’s already formulating a plan to get you out, and he’s willing to bet Umemiya is doing the same.

Extending the truce is agreed on. They even shake hands on it.

As Hiragi and Umemiya make their way toward the exit, Hiragi looks over his shoulder. You’re wearing Takiishi’s ugly-ass fur coat, but that’s the only comfort you get from him.

Hiragi watches as that ginger fuck leans forward to get in your face, not shouting but louder than Hiragi has ever heard him— “what did I fucking say? You think you’re cute putting on that show for him? Moaning his name—disgusting fucking whore!”

Hiragi is flying through the air, fist pulled back, and his punch lands just after Takiishi backhands you hard enough to knock you over. Hiragi’s knuckles slam into his jaw with a satisfying crack, and he grins when Takiishi spits out a molar.

So much for that truce.

[hazedxhealing]

endogenic means your system formed in another way besides trauma, theres prob like 3 people who actually fake DIDOSDD (which are dissociative disorders, not traumatic) and the icd 11 states that you can have multiple personalities (alters) without a disorder.

Incorrect. DID is caused by trauma and will always be a trauma disorder. Dissociative disorders are caused by trauma. Trauma is literally the entire cause.

Next question.

[hazedxhealing]

What signs of faking did you learn from r/fdc? How can you recognize if someone is faking?

Learn? From r/FDC? Nothing. I learned the signs well before even joined the subreddit, via the same research and cross studying I’ve mentioned in the last few answers.

I just cross reference what I already know with the posts in the subred and wowie.

It’s not the system size, or aesthetic, or pronouns or any of that superficial stuff.

It’s the rate at which alters form, they can only form in situations where you are retraumatized or in a trauma response state, they cannot form from simple just ingesting media.

Not taking system accountability is a big thing within fakers, they tend to point fingers instead of taking responsibility for the body’s actions as a whole. There is no “it wasn’t me it was (insert alter)”, if they did it, you did it.

It’s the misinformation that fakers spread, such as DID forming from just stress, or your mom being mad at you, etc. DID forms only in instances of severe repeated childhood trauma. Severe physical trauma, SA/CSA, severe mental/emotional trauma. Has to be severe enough to break down the psyche and it has to be repeated, it’s not one singular event.

Also the big one of blaming ppl who are diagnosed for them not being diagnosed, with “you’re lucky you have trauma”, “you don’t deserve your trauma”, etc.

FDC hasn’t taught me anything of what I know. I taught me. I took the initiative to learn what I know.

[hazedxhealing]

Have you tried seething harder?

Seriously though, it's absolutely balls to the walls wild to wake up to being called a transphobe for *checks notes* supporting the existence of medically and scientifically proven nom-dysphoric trans people, as a trans person.

That's so crazy. Hey, OPC, have you tried shutting the fuck up?

The dysphoria debate cannot be compared to endo v traumagen. Dysphoria has been SCIENTIFICALLY PROVEN to not be necessary to be trans. Endos have not been proven in any case to be real, medically or scientifically.

Given a study. Give me a legitimate study that isn't a carrd dot com essay done by a 14 year old.

You need trauma to be a system, endos aren't real. Point blank period. Die mad.

[hazedxhealing]

ur not even a system stay out of syscourse jfc

Correct, I’m not a system, but I was.

Two years ago, I was a system. Two years ago, I had a system, I had headmates, I had the tracker.

Two years ago I was WRONG.

It is okay to be wrong, it is okay to think you have something when you do not, but what isn’t okay is to insist that - again, read very carefully here - a disorder cause by severe and repetitive childhood trauma, is able to be willed into existence.

You literally, physically, medically, scientifically cannot make a system by pure will. It’s not possible. You have to have a break down of your psyche in your formative years, caused by severe and debilitating trauma.

How do I know this, you’re probably asking yourself while you think up a snotty little response.

Extensive - almost a decade long - research.

And I don’t mean those little quiz’s online either, I mean digging up multiple year long extensive studies, and cross referencing with the last 4 editions of the DSM-5, digging up control studies where self made systems are the control in said study, and cross referencing that. Reading textbooks on psychology and the way the psyche handles traumatic input, and how enough horrific trauma causes DID to develop. There was an entire independent 3 year long study I did myself, where I asked my own psychiatrist (s) some questions about DID and I then cross referenced that with everything else I’d dug up. I looked into the earliest known cases of DID, and cases that were tracked back when it was still referred to as MPD. I’ve looked into cases on DID in children, and what age groups are the most likely to be affected/hosts for the disorder to set up. I’ve looked into the different types and subtypes of traumatic input that causes DID to develop. I’ve cross referenced all of this, along with what I thought was DID (my own experience). And then I cross referenced all a of that again against endogenic phenomena theory using multiple of the same research methods with exactly 0 data cross linking.

And if that’s not enough, my best friend is a psychologist. She went to school for and got a degree in psychology. I ran everything I just mentioned by her, and cross referenced with her own textbooks and curriculum.

So I am - at the very least - 88% allowed to speak on syscourse issues.

Endos literally, physically, medically, and psychologically aren’t real, hope that helps ☺️☺️

[hazedxhealing]

Just so y'all know, I'm not gonna respond to big long text walls filled with garbage and dismissal.

I am firm on my stance against endos. Long text walls won't change that.

Cope harder.

[hazedxhealing]

Eat shit ablest cunt.

Ah, yes, ableism is when you don’t let people fake life altering, debilitating,  mental illnesses /s

[hazedxhealing]

i am now super curious why you thought you were a system, what brought you to believe you were a system, and why you stopped believing you were a system. do you still experience "system-esque" experiences but consider them singlet experiences now?

also my comment about you sounding like a detrans individual is like a comparison of apples to oranges, similar in my brain although obviously different in other ways. just because you were mistaken about your plural experiences does not mean that everyone else is, which is similar (not equal or the exact same, but similar) to some detrans people assuming everyone else is actually not trans and was deluded / misinformed.

and i will seethe, because it's frustrating to see singlets spread judgemental nonsense when the science doesn't conclusively say shit. the science doesn't say "there's definitely no way to experience multiple people in the brain without trauma", it says that the disorder labeled DID is the primary way they see it and treat it, since IT'S A DISORDER. if its not a disorder for someone, why would DISORDER specialists CARE? most research of systemhood (that isn't "aww look at this sad person who was hurt so so bad and cannot function :(( they need to become Whole again <3 i hope they become Normal and One Being instead of being InSaNe") is still in its 'childhood'. just like... a lot of science relating to the brain, imo.

anyway i will block you after you respond to this ask, it's just annoying to see singlets in syscourse. you cannot speak for us. you do not speak for the system community unless you ARE a system or are a professional that is trustworthy and fact checked to not be an ableist shitbag.

I’m going to preface this, again, with how I’ve done my own extensive almost decade long independent research, where I dug up literal studies, done by medical professionals, and cross referenced that with the multiple versions of the DSM-5 and psych textbooks I was studying. I then took that information, complied a list of questions, and asked my own psychiatrist these questions after my appointments off record, and cross referenced that with what information I’d already had. And then I took all of that multiple years worth of research I’d done and took it to my best friend who is a LITERAL CERTIFIED PSYCH WHO WENT TO COLLEGE FOR IT, and we cross referenced all of that with her own textbooks and DSM-5 variations.

I’ve done enough research to know what I’m talking about. I’ve gotten enough confirmation from medical professionals to know what I’m talking about. Science, and psychology, say that the only way to be plural outside of cultural differences is severe and repetitive childhood trauma. There is no other way to break the psyche down enough to cause fragmentation of one’s personality.

I thought I was a system for multiple different reasons, one being I fit the criteria including severe repeated childhood trauma as well as a few other factors that can be comorbid with other disorders.

I would have to completely trauma dump to explain where the line between what I thought it was and what it actually was happened.

But for a good bit of my formative years I’d had these symptoms, and lived my life as a system. Flash forward to being with my ex husband, who WAS FAKING DID HIMSELF, who had me brainwashed, who Munchhausen by proxy-ed me multiple times before, was using the same logic endos have and willing alters to appear. He was MAKING alter, the same way endos do, and even with his own, he used them as a crutch to abuse me.

So, I went to my - again, medically certified - psych best friend, and was like, hey (insert big long text about how my plural experience seems fucky and I’m kinda confused) and she came back with (insert long message about how it’s not DID, it’s BPD and my ex husband definitely forced the DID dx on me but I didn’t know it was forced into me because, again, brainwashed, MCBP)

I have enough of an experience with how DID does and doesn’t worth, I have enough of my own experience, plus watching my ex husband faking, plus multiple medical professionals confirming the research I’d done, plus the research itself, to have a leg in this conversation.

If you don’t like that I am advocating for people to STOP FAKING SERIOUS AND DEBILITATING MENTAL ILLNESS then that is a you problem, not a me problem. If you would rather people continue to make it harder for you to be taken seriously, or to be treated in times like medical abuse, or make it even harder to be evaluated because of the culture around DIDOSDD they are laying down, then go for it but I’m not going to continue to let people use a disorder caused by the most horrific childhood experiences for clout.

[hazedxhealing]

If you were wrong, then you were wrong. You were never a system. You never had headmates. You were just pretending the whole time.

You can't have it both ways. You can be a former system whose headmates are all dormant or fused. Or you can be a singlet who was confused and never had any headmates.

But you can't claim to be both.

I don’t know where the disconnect in this conversation is when I’ve explained and explicitly said I was SURE that I had DID until I was proven wrong. I was so sure that I was seeking evaluation and diagnosis, until I came to the conclusion otherwise.

Faking/pretending and being making a mistake/being wrong aren’t synonymous. I was not consciously faking, I was consciously trying to figure out what was wrong with me and why I had the symptoms I was experiencing. That is the difference, and to try to flip it isn’t something it’s not is inane and irrelevant.

Either block me, or cope and stop sending asks, saying the same things worded differently, when I’ve given more than enough explanation.

I’m not stopping, deal with it.

[hazedxhealing]

"but i was!!! but it was also faking so" yeah so you weren't a system, and still aren't. literally you sound like a detrans person who gets mad at trans people and yell at nonbinary folk n stuff. kinda funny actually

just stay out of this conversation, you're a singlet and you recognize that. sincerely, a traumatized system <3

1. Theres a huge difference between explicitly and consciously faking and just being wrong about your own lived experiences and how they affect you, and you know it. I thought I was a system, key word here being THOUGHT, I wasn’t faking, I genuinely thought I had it right, and through everything I mentioned in the last answer, along with my best friend who - again, has a degree in psychology - I concluded that I was wrong and I no longer claim to be a system, I have made a post about it, and am in the process of removing/fixing past posts to reflect that.

2. I am literally trans, so I don’t know where you’re getting that stereotypical rhetoric from nor why gender identity is even being brought into this when it’s not even apart of the topic??

3. No. I’m going to continue advocating for the literal proven science behind DID and how it doesn’t validate endos (because they don’t exist), and you can either get over it and block me or you can get bent and seeth harder. Simple.

[hazedxhealing]

"Cope harder" <- someone who is blatantly struggling to cope with the existence of people who are "mocking a disorder" they dont even have. L. "seethe harder" bro endos havent stopped yet and theyre for sure not gonna stop for you 😭

And I’m not gonna stop advocating for the separation of MEDICAL APPROPRIATION and genuine experience.

No, I don’t have DID, I thought I did, I was WRONG. I have admitted to being wrong and tag that I am no longer questioning.

I didn’t have to - I could have continued as my former suspicion, but I didn’t, because it is so incredibly easy to admit you’re wrong and not fake horrific debilitating trauma induced disorders, and yet. I could have actively and consciously harmed a community that is already suffering and not being taken seriously, but nope, I’m advocating instead.

It is physically impossible to willingly “create” a system. It is impossible to be a system without severe and repetitive childhood trauma.

The only valid system is a disordered system, and to insist otherwise is infinitely more ableist than activism for disordered plurals ever will be.

If you are endorsing, and have trauma linked back to your system, guess what? You have a system FORMED BY TRUAMA and are disordered.

Seeth.