#energy and at least it's fun. the alternative is sitting on the couch and constantly falling asleep again 🙃)

[running-in-the-dark]

at this point it would be easier if I just made one post that says "I'm tired today" and reblogged it every day. or maybe I should just say "I'm not tired today" on the rare days when that happens because tbh it does not happen

[thebouncykingdom]

Bounce Houses in Frisco TX

BOUNCE HOUSES IN FRISCO TX

Bounce House

Bounce house jumping in Frisco TX

SENSORY INPUT FOR CHILDREN WITH AUTISM

If you have children, the fact that they love to jump on furniture is no secret - whether they have autism or not. But while neurotypical children may have fun jumping on the couch every now and then, the activity serves an important purpose for children with autism - it checks a box that children without autism don’t have. 

Jumping is enjoyable for children with autism because it’s soothing, and it provides sensory input with a repetitive bouncing action. 

Searching for an Outlet

If your child has autism and is constantly bouncing on the couch, she may be doing more than just releasing pent-up energy. 

An autistic child’s body needs input. Occupational therapists call this “proprioceptive input,” which refers to the input the body receives through the joints and muscles. The body receives this input through various activities like pushing, pulling, lifting, or jumping. 

This is the main reason why children with autism love to bounce - and we love that they love to bounce, because it’s a beneficial way to receive stimulation, and it isn’t harming anyone. 

At least, it’s not harming people. After a while, your couch might start to take a beating. 

Reasons Behind the Jump

As you look for solutions to your child’s constant jumping, it’s important to find the root cause of the behavior. In some cases, it’s because your child enjoys the act of repetition. If that’s the case, the solution is simple. You just need to find a place she can jump that is meant to be bounced on. 

For some, this means a mini-trampoline with handles to grab onto for balance. For others with a bigger solution in mind, it means an inflatable bounce house. More on that in a bit!

Whatever solution you choose for your repetition-craving child, make sure to fit in a few sessions of it throughout the day. You might place one of the sessions an hour or so before bedtime (not directly before, because you don’t want to wind him or her up) to get out the last of the day’s energy. 

In some cases, children with autism crave bouncing because of sensory issues they have. If that’s the case, talking it over with your child’s occupational therapist is the best route to take, because there may be alternatives that are less disruptive than the constant bounce. 

Once you figure out the input that your child craves, along with a safe way to deliver it, you may notice your child feeling and acting calmer, along with an increased degree of awareness towards her surroundings. She’ll feel much better with her needs met, which won’t just improve her mood, but yours as well. You may notice her attention span lengthening, and you may be able to enjoy activities, like homework or sitting down for dinner, that you never could before. 

The Inflatable Bounce House Solution

Furniture doesn’t come cheap. If your child is constantly jumping on the couch, you’ll notice wear and tear before long - and a sagging couch doesn’t offer much comfort. There are plenty of other bouncy solutions for your child with autism, though, that will fulfill her sensory needs in the same way the couch does. 

You might start off with a mattress, a mountain of pillows, or an exercise ball, but if you’ve got a skilled jumper on your hands that needs more room to play, there’s no better option than an inflatable bounce house. 

The inflatable bounce houses that we offer at The Bouncy Kingdom have more room than a pillow fort, couch, and mattress put together. With tons of options to choose from, from a Unicorn Bounce House to a Sports bounce house, there’s something for all the bounce-lovers out there. Our bounce houses are meant for kids who love to jump, and they provide an environment where your little one can do so safely. They’re a great investment, as they’ll last and last and you won’t have to worry about them sustaining the damage that your furniture suffers. 

In an inflatable bounce house, your child with autism can jump and jump until their mind and body feel content and at ease. Make sure to monitor her activity at all times, just like you would if she were bouncing on the couch. 

The Inflatable Alternative

Once you find the bouncy alternative that helps your child calm their body down, make sure to share it with loved ones in your circle. They’ll be just as glad that you and your child found a solution!

Please note that, while those of us at The Bouncy Kingdom care a great deal about the health and well-being of your child, we are not medical experts. We are simply sharing what has worked for others in our community. If you have any questions, consult your child’s doctor.

[deltas-writing-corner]

Tsukumo Yuki relationship headcanons

Fandom: Jujutsu Kaisen

Pairing: Tsukumo Yuki x reader

Author note: Tsukomo Yuki is the reason I love woman and she can crush me between her thighs send tweet

Warnings: Potential manga spoilers (?) | Mentions of s*x, but nothing too blatantly explicit. I would still prefer it if minors did not interact with this post in any way.

Yuki always asks the people she meets what type of woman they like. If someone were to ask that same question back to her, she’ll most certainly utter back your name as if it were an obvious response.

What’s not to love about you? You’re cute. You make her laugh. You cook for her because heaven knows she can't if her life depended on it. Most importantly, you keep her company due to the lack of curses she’s ever sent to exorcise. Traveling the world is fun and all, but it’s even more fun with you by her side!

You’re not a sorcerer. You can’t even see curses. Yuki is a childhood friend of yours and has kept you in the loop regarding the world of jujutsu sorcery since she started integrating into it. She thinks it’s important for you to know that someone like you, a non-curse user who has no control over the curse energy you create, should know what exactly your negative emotions can lead to. It’s not to make you feel bad or pin blame on you in any way. It’s her way of protecting you beyond physical means as well as a way of showing you that she places a great deal of trust in you regarding the nature of her line of work and her true goals.

Because she rejects the methods of the higher-ups and her ideology is more along the lines of putting an end to the creation of curses permanently instead of letting them manifest and dealing with them when they start causing profound trouble, you’re often the one that has to listen to all her new, sometimes overreaching, hypotheses now and then. You may even take part in her research, but she would never put you in any sort of harm! At least, not unless you give her the okay to. Be warned, if you give your blessing to be her little lab rat she’s prone to get carried away with her methods. Speak up if she’s doing something outrageous or if she’s making you uncomfortable. Otherwise, you might end up in some precarious situations.

As mentioned previously, Yuki isn’t sent out on missions that often, if ever. She instead chooses to travel in and out of the country, for the sake of her research as well as for the pleasure of it. Since she’s one of three, later four, special grade sorcerers her salary is rather tremendous. Unfortunately, her travels outside Japan are “unauthorized” and sometimes her funds get frozen by the higher-ups. Her quick solution to the matter is to fly back, take on a mission or two to get her funds unfrozen (and into your account because you’re her partner-in-crime) or even take on a mission to earn some more funds, and then you and her are right back to traveling the world again.

During one of these money replenishing heists, she met a kid that she took a particular interest in and wanted to mentor, Aoi Todo. It’s hard for most people to spark her interest to the extent Todo did, so you happily supported her endeavors and even met with her young pupil a few times throughout the years. Her methods of training are a bit....extreme, to put it lightly. You understand that holding back her punches will only hinder Todo’s progress instead of allowing him the ability to improve and push past his limits, but you can’t help but flinch over the large scar that marks his face whenever you briefly meet up with him.

Todo is eccentric, but so is Yuki. Perhaps not idol obsessed like Todo, but seeing the way he takes great care of his appearance and flaunts his body (during a battle even), he’s a near-identical clone of Yuki. She knows that she’s good-looking, and she will always flaunt this fact to anyone with working eyes, even you! Does it work every single time? Yes. Yes, it does.

Honestly, how can it not? She’s tall. She has a great butt. She drives a motorcycle. Her tight biker pants are your Achilles heels and she knows it. Sometimes she’ll wear them around the house just to flaunt her curves and other bodily goods, even if it’s the middle of the summer, the AC is broken and the pants are made of stuffy leather material. If it gets your face all heated up, she'll wear it.

The compliments she gets from strangers are nice and all, but it’s your reactions she truly cares about. You’ve been by her side through it all. You're still sticking with her even despite the fact that she’s constantly moving around and living a somewhat free-spirited lifestyle. You genuinely support and help her when almost everyone else has rejected her methods and ideals and brush her off as some lazy, outrageous-thinking woman. Really, you stole this woman’s heart just by letting her be herself, a lazy, outrageous-thinking woman.

Yuki is indeed lazy, to the point it sometimes affects you and your shared apartment is left in a week-long accumulated mess. I’m talking clothes strewed about and spilling out the already full laundry basket, sink filled with dirty dishes, houseplant half dead due to insufficient watering, and little dusty bunnies in the corner of the room. Whenever you try to get around to getting your living space in order, she always drags you back to the bed with her either to nap some more or for a quick round of sex that leads to more napping. Eventually, you have to beat her with a pillow and threaten her with no sex for a certain period of time to get her to back off, which always works without fail.

If you really hold the “no sex until...” ultimatum over her head long enough, she’ll even pitch in and help you clean. But to be honest she kinda sucks at it so it’s sometimes better to just have her sit on the sidelines while you do all the work. She’ll jokingly suggest you clean with just an apron on (because she’s a freak like that), but you haven’t taken her up on the suggestion just yet. It’s mostly because you’ll use the “naked apron” method to further insinuate her punishment if your usual threat begins to lose its potency (because you are also a freak like that).

She’s a bad sleeping partner. Not only does she hog all the blankets and pillows, but she even stretches out her limbs over the entire bed. This usually leaves you curled up in a corner shivering your ass off until you either fall asleep via exhaustion or move to the couch. If you go to the couch, she’s 99.9% likely to wake up and join you shortly after, where she’s less of a hassle to deal with because of the limited space.

She’s a great big spoon, which is actually one of the ways you later use to solve her troublesome habits as once she latches onto you, she will not let go the rest of the evening. Unfortunately, she also snores terribly loud, but it’s nothing earbuds can’t fix.

Some might think she sleeps in something flattering, maybe even a bit scanty. That couldn’t be any further from the truth. Her pj’s are decades-old shirts and gym shorts that she never got around to getting rid of. If not that, she’ll sleep completely naked and she doesn’t care if someone walks in on her with the covers off. She’ll only ever wear lingerie or other promiscuous pieces of clothing if she has intentions of getting between your legs and rocking your world for the rest of the night.

I think it goes without saying that she looks great in lace, but as hot as she may look, she really likes seeing you dressed up in something risque as well.

If you’re female, she sometimes likes to wear matching lingerie sets with you, but her favorite material to see you in is leather, especially those harness-styled sets that squeeze your flesh all around.

If you’re male, she’s a complete sucker for a man in a clean-cut, custom-tailored suit and will take it off as soon as you put it on. Hope you don’t mind losing a button or two, because she will pop them off for sure when she rips your dress shirt off of you.

To all my gender-neutral folks, It’s never too late to whip out that naked apron I mentioned earlier! Or a leather jacket. Everyone looks great in a leather jacket!

Yuki’s diet is fucking terrible. You’re a decent cook, but despite this, all she ever seems to want is greasy take-out food that makes you wonder how the hell she’s still so fit after witnessing her down three chicken burritos in one sitting. Even when the two of you are abroad and are able to try out different types of cuisines not so readily available in Japan, she’ll still want to go out to a fast food joint that you can easily find everywhere. You’ve tried to get her to branch out of her comfort zone and eat somewhat healthier alternatives of her favorite foods, but so far you’ve gotten mixed results.

In summary: Yuki is a pretty outgoing person and sometimes can be a bit of a hassle to deal with, but she’s clearly ambitious and moves to the tune of her own beat. Her goal of finding and effectively eliminating the source of all curses is a testament to the fact that she wants to save future generations from having to carry the burden sorcerers have been carrying for thousands of years. Her goals are not only for the sake of the people who will come after her, but also for the sake of her future with you. You’re someone she genuinely cares for and wishes to spend the rest of her life with, evident by the numerous times she’s come clean to you about her fears of you dying when she isn't around to protect you or of her dying and leaving you behind to mourn during late-night pillow talks in hotels or in your shared home. A future where you and her can travel the world and truly take in and enjoy the sights and wonders instead of searching for an answer to one of the world’s greatest phenomenon is a future worth fighting for, even if she’s met with some pushback or the end goal seems like nothing more than a pipedream at times. So long as you’re there with her to see her research bear fruit, she’ll keep testing and coming up with new methods to eliminate curses permanently, no matter the extremes her research takes her to.

[xathia-89]

Playing in the Alpha’s World - Pt 7

The private German lessons had been helpful, even when Hideyoshi had baulked at the cost for three of us to be tutored. Then his eyes had threatened to bug out of his head when I insisted that our tutor would be moving with us for a few months to Berlin to ensure that we could manage to continue managing to converse in a fit business etiquette properly. Mitsuhide just signed the cheque to authorise it and passed it to Nobunaga for the second signature.  

Kenshin had passed the bar officially over to Kagekatsu to manage now he had graduated from university. He listed the Berlin office as to where to get hold of him for future correspondence, and it meant he could open a bar with the same name since he kept himself still down as the owner. A Japanese theme dive bar would have its own merits and also something different to offer.  

We couldn’t seem to open the office fast enough, we had a demand to manage the accounts of so many businesses that we were getting Shingen to do our recruiting. I never felt like I was going home at any point aside from to sleep and shower, and the amount of times I’d been woken up by Mitsuhide after falling asleep looking over resumes or someone else’s request for us to manage them.

“Kayda,” Mitsuhide’s voice was something I heard more than Kenshin the past couple of months, as I looked up at him. “You’re exhausted. Don’t come in tomorrow. In fact, make it a four day weekend. I already know Kenshin has a bar manager and he’d rather close the bar than leave you be. You need to relax.”

“It must be bad if you’re the one telling me to do that,” I sighed, tidying up the executive desk I’d taken over with potential clients requests. “And before you say a word, no one will be ever able to find anything if I don’t organise this all before I go home.”

Mitsuhide didn’t trust me to get wrapped up in a new task, he lingered, waiting for me to finish filing everything away before I was escorted out to the street. He smirked as I flipped him off and said I’d see him next week, shifting my bag on my shoulder.

Berlin was like most capital cities. People came here to make their mark and way in the country, it was constantly busy. It wasn’t uncommon for us to arrange dinners to take place at eight pm at night, and then clients would go back to their offices afterwards. Not that we hadn’t had plenty of times of ordering in take away because it was so late and we couldn’t let problems sit overnight. The time zone difference was killing everyone. Nobunaga and Ieyasu had landed a few days ago in New York, and I was getting calls at all hours when people weren’t able to work out that I was GMT+1, making me eight hours behind Kyoto, and then six hours ahead of New York. We didn't keep very regular hours at the moment, and I suspected that may become the standard case for myself and Mitsuhide for the immediate future. One of us would need to take over the contact with New York and the other to focus on Kyoto with enough of a crossover to touch base. I was silent and focused on my thoughts as I walked home. I had insisted that the flat we had would be close enough of a range that I didn't have more than a ten-minute walk in heels to go. I never fancied needing to get transport home when I could walk.  

Kenshin was stuck on the news when I opened the door.

“Things must be bad if you’re being sent home for a four day weekend,” he smiled from the couch.

"I knew you and Mitsuhide exchanging phone numbers would be bad for me," I shook my head, locking the door behind me before I took my shoes off. "Well, I've fallen asleep at my desk every day this week, and I've been in for the past forty-three days on the trot as well," I shrugged. "I'm surprised I haven't had a heat," I sighed, sinking down onto the sofa next to him. I breathed his scent in deeply, snuggling into his chest as my head was resting on his shoulder.  

Kenshin didn't give me a chance to settle, though. "Your heat may not have started yet," he grunted. I was flat on my back on the sofa, and under him, my eyes wide open as the smell hit me and made me cream my panties immediately. "But my rut has," he murmured against my throat, kissing and nipping alternately as my skirt was pushed up around my waist to allow him unrestricted access with the removal of my tights and panties. "So I told Mitsuhide you would likely come into heat since my rut has started. Hence his instructions,” he mumbled, nuzzling into my neck as I felt the pleasure of his mark starting to bloom on my skin. “So, be a good girl and please your alpha,” he purred.

***

True to form, it was several days later as we fucked our way through the mutual heat and rut before I was back in the office. I saw a few of our workers giving each other looks, Kenshin had left a few markings more than a little visible given my office wear of open-collar shirts. I didn't have the energy to deal with it as Mitsuhide smirked to see the state I was in on my return.  

“It was hell without me, then?” I asked, looking through the post on my desk. It was starting to look like I was as much an equal partner in this branch as Mitsuhide was, instead of the secretarial role I had inhabited before.

“Yup. But you needed that, as did Kenshin,” he shrugged. “Nature is a fun thing,” he smirked.

“Tell me about it," I sighed, my computer taking its time in opening my inbox. "Shingen is on for getting us more employees at least, and he's offered to come over for a week too," I read off the top email with a nod, already bringing up a calendar to synchronise all three of us. "Also, have you put out for a secretary for us yet?" I sighed, peering around to look at Mitsuhide.  

“I was going to ask how you’d feel about it,” he replied. “Half of the things I am looking at I feel like I should be delegating, but I don’t have the staff to delegate to yet.”

“I know that feeling," I agreed, blocking us all out for the following Monday, Shingen would get the first flight in and land around 9.30am. He would stay with Kenshin and me to save on some costs, and there were enough restaurants to eat at around here where we could break and then work again. I was literally watching Shingen populate my diary with him as interviews were already being proposed for times at the office.  

Our reputation had preceded us. Everyone knew we could deliver the services, it was just mostly getting the staff. The late nights and early mornings continued, though not without the majority of people knowing that we were practically living at the offices to get things established. It wasn't uncommon for us to get messages or employees sticking their heads into our joint office, asking if they could help with anything. It was then we put the internal memo out that we were going to hire a secretary to assist with the management of our workload with the instruction to send a resume and cover letter to Shingen via email.

Both of us had been busy working through some potential new clients when my phone line went dead, and Mitsuhide was glaring at his screen. Then I looked up to find a smiling Shiori holding my phone line and power cable in one hand and then pointed to one of her co-workers holding the power and phone line for Mitsuhide. She smiled and waved as Shingen was chuckling to himself in the background, while Kenshin was glaring at the office in general. He must have been feeling a little territorial before being shown in as Shiori was already picking up the phone to call back the potentials with a cheery smile.

“I didn’t realise it was this bad,” Shingen frowned, looking over our desks. “I’ve got a lot of interviews starting at 9am tomorrow, and last for the whole week from 9am to 7pm, with an hour for lunch. But I feel like I should be making them for that scale for next week as well.”

“You’re all making it worse than it is,” I waved my hand dismissively. “We have interviews for four days, we can see who will fit in the company. They are all aware that just because they’re interviewing for one role, doesn’t mean that they won’t be offered another role, correct?”

“Yes, I’ve emphasised that it’s a booming company, and anyone who has done their research will be aware that it’s not a startup, just a new location,” Shingen nodded. “You sound like you aren’t talking to an experienced recruiter.”

His tone was a little rap on the back of the knuckles before my handbag was picked up, and then my backpack and Mitsuhide's.  

“What are you doing?” I asked, glaring at Kenshin and Shingen accusingly.

“You two need to catch up with me over lunch and then go through the resumes,” Shingen shrugged. “And we’re doing it at your two’s ‘flat’,” the way he used the air quotes made me frown. “It’s huge,” he laughed. “And you’re living in downtown Berlin, so I know it’s not cheap-”

“Someone’s grandmother sent us a down payment for buying property after the news of us being in a relationship was shared,” I explained. “We used it.”

“I did wonder,” Mitsuhide smirked, reluctantly joining us in the elevator to get going.

***

Going through resumes while perched on Kenshin's lap on our stupidly comfortable sofas was heaven. I had been forced to shower and get into one of Kenshin's sweaters and a pair of leggings on getting out before I was allowed back out to work. The coffee was made en mass, while we were doing individual evaluations and even some of the ones that Shingen had been on the fence about but not offered an interview were dragged out for potentially being brought in the following week.

One order of Chinese takeaway later and we had enough extras to bring in for two more days of interviews. Now, we glanced up at the clock in time to realise that it was time to get some sleep. Shingen smiled at Kenshin and me before showing Mitsuhide out, making him promise to get some sleep before letting him have his backpack back.  

“Will I get some sleep tonight?” He teased.

“The place was soundproofed already,” I yawned, before realising what I had implied, and blushed.

“Just checking, since Kenshin had never bothered,” he laughed, waving before taking himself off to bed.

Kenshin picked me up, refusing to let me get off him.

“Kenshin,” I whined.

“I want you to have the staff so that I know I can come home to you, and have you to myself for a while, but I don’t want you to be gone like you will be for interviews to ensure that,” he sulked.

“Mm, soon,” I murmured, nuzzling into his neck as I enjoyed the feeling of his arms around me.

[funkymbtifiction]

This is sort of a weird question but, I know you can't exactly "change" your type but is there any way to strengthen different functions in your stacking to the point where you act/appear like another type?

Sure, most people do it on a daily basis.

Think about it. Who is harder to type, the stereotype or the balanced person? Whose nuances deepen whenever you look at them, who seems ‘good at’ several functions to the extent where you might face confusion over their stacking order?

When you work on a task, you use a different set of functions. If I’m doing something with great efficiency and skill that I have done a thousand times before, if that’s all you saw from me, in that context, you might assume I was an ISTJ because damn, that girl can get tedious things done! Unless you went home with me and saw me collapse on the couch in exhaustion, you might think me keeping track of details is easy-peasy. It’s not. And trying to focus Ne-dom onto a single task for 5 hours… or 7 hours… or longer… is like trying to keep an 8 ton whale on track with a fishing line. Good luck with that.

You know what improves functions?

Practice.

You know why a lot of people don’t improve their lower functions?

It’s hard work.

If your natural tendency is to be a scatterbrain with a short attention span whose mind goes 987 directions a minute, it’s not real fun to sit down in front of a filing cabinet for 6 hours and painstakingly put the contents in order, is it? But that’s how my Te/Si learns to do things. My Te also likes to finish things, and feel good about staying on top of things, which is at constant war with my Ne-dom/inferior Si procrastination techniques. I both love and hate routine; hate it, because I feel trapped by it. Love it, because I get stuff done when I have a routine, when I planned out what I intended to accomplish the night before, and I focus only on doing those things, so I can clear my to-do list, and get to the ‘fun’ things that I want to focus on.

So, how do you develop lower functions?

Te: organize externally by compiling information and/or putting things in order. You can organize a shelf, your sock drawer, your movie collection, or a schedule for you to keep to the next day that lists in what order you can do things for maximum efficiency (clue: tasks that take the least amount of time move fastest, enabling you to cross them off your list, and the motivation it creates by seeing your progress / things leave the list will give you the focus and energy to tackle the larger projects on that list).

Ti: analyze why you enjoy what you enjoy, or why you reacted as you did, with a desire to understand what motivates your actions and influences your mood. Read ‘heavy’ books that teach you how things work, so you have a better in-depth understanding of them and can form a stronger internal system of logic.

Fe: practice tuning in emotionally to others, and allowing their feelings to seep into you. Ask them questions and take a genuine interest in their life. Think about how your decisions might influence someone else, and do something you know will please them, to get a positive result. Learn to talk through your feelings as things happen, so you can process them in the moment and not bottle them up for a future implosion.

Fi: at the end of the day, shut out all external distractions, go into a room by yourself, and think about how your day went, how you felt about everything that happened, what you are excited about, and take an internal assessment to find out whether you feel you are on the right path toward achieving what you most care about.

Se: learn to saturate yourself physically in your environment, by actually engaging with it, focusing on how you breathe, on how that tree feels, on the smallest details in your environment and their beauty. Notice how many feathers a bird has, or the pattern on a ladybug’s wings. Push all future ideas from your mind and constantly re-center yourself in the present. Allow the moment to linger in your enjoyment.

Si: at the end of the day, think about everything that happened, and how you perceived each interaction. If you want to remember those things, focus on fixing them in your mind, in creating weight, depth, and significance to them, and in ‘storing’ them for future access. (If you can picture them, or repeat what someone said, that may help.) You can also practice derailing Ne’s tendency to skim read by reading small sections of information, then transcribing them in your own words with the book shut, and comparing them for equal meaning.

Ne: take something you love, and come up with several different ways to interpret or see it, based on alternate perspectives as ideas occur to you. If you find yourself engaged in fatalistic or fearful thinking, be deliberate in pulling up an equal possibility that is positive for comparison and telling yourself, “Yes, it could go wrong, or THIS wonderful thing might happen!”

Ni: spend some time each day focused on what you most want from life, in visualizing what it will look like when you get it, and in centering it in your mind, so it can impact the choices you make on a daily basis. Allow yourself permission to dream and fantasize, even if it seems unrealistic.

- ENFP Mod

[cortisoladdict]

Weekend

I spent a whole weekend with my adorable ass boyfriend and it was sooooooo good.

So good.

He came over Friday night and we cooked a Tanzanian dish together (Pilau). Messed up a thing or two here and there, but now I basically know how to make this dish, and it was still really good. We ate with my roommate, then he helped me clean up. While taking out the trash, we got locked out (my roommate was showering lol) so I gave him a boost through my window and we got back inside 😅 While we were cooking I pressed him to teach me more Swahili, so I felt like I made a little more progress.

That night we talked about how when he feels stressed he doesn't show it much. I had thought so--he never seems stressed to me, but having gone through MIT myself I was sure he must be, at least a little. He shared that he got pretty bad test anxiety, and that he's slowly learned how to deal with it. I am glad that he's slowly opening up to me more about the things he struggles with, though of course I don't wish him any suffering. However, it's a natural part of human life, and it's a sign of closeness to share not just your good times but the bad ones too, I think.

Sex after deep talks is pretty fuckin good. I definitely believe that emotional/mental state or closeness matters when it comes to sex. I have really good sex with this man. Really. Good.

The next morning (Saturday) we ate our Pilau and just Netflix and chilled. I like how he has all these dynamic little touches when we're with each other, like when we're holding hands he'll use his thumb to rub my fingers a bit, or when we're on the couch and I'm squirming around constantly and leaning on him this way and that, he'll rub me a little bit, or lean over and kiss me. It's so nice, it makes me feel loved.

We watched Mo Gilligan's comedy special because we saw him on YouTube once, so it was nice to have that moment come full circle. We talked about doing something--going to the library maybe, idk...we lingered a little bit and then, of course, we're just on the couch, makin out, I get on top of him, our tops are off, I laugh--scandalous, I say. Very, he responds.

In my bed, I ask him to take me from behind, he finishes twice, I am tingling with all the sexual energy I have, with all the desire I have for him. He's spent so he laughs, saying 'I'm the drained battery now" (a reference to what I said about myself once), he takes my vibrator and finishes me.

I love this man.

I read him a chapter out of his book and for some reason he really likes when I read to him. We have been so wrapped up in each other that we totally forget about dinner we're supposed to have with a friend, until he calls me, so we rush to meet a group and go to this Ethiopian restaurant (it's a weekend of East African food). Afterward, I want to go to the club, he kinda wanted to just go home and read again which I agreed to but he insisted we go, since he knew I'd been trying to for a while. So I said we'd pregame at home first to give him some energy. We drank a bottle of wine and played 'never have I ever' and 'two truths and a lie', which was fun because I already knew so much about him but I got to learn a bunch of other new, silly things, hear some interesting anecdotes, tidbits of his life. You have to get creative when you play those games with a close friend.

We take an uber to the club, it's not that lit but I am satisfied, I dance and wine and twerk and grind. Some dude fist bumps him while I'm winin' (lol) then at like 1:30am I'm super exhausted and spent. We sit at one of the lounges and alternate staring at each other and making out (cheesy, I know). The club is normally a place that's less fun with a partner, because part of the whole fun of a club is playing the who-can-I-get-with game, a game I've played many times before. But I was happy to be there with him; I realized how much I enjoyed it still. I thought, this is my person, the one for me. I told him in Swahili, Nakupenda (I love you). He never responds--or rather, he never responds with words. Instead, he just kisses me, slowly and deliberately. When he's away and I get too in my head this worries me, but when we're together I don't doubt that he loves me. I know also that I'm cheating a little--you never feel something the same way in another language.

Of course when we come home I am all over him. I love being with him; I love sleeping naked and warm and happy.

We wake up at like 1pm on Sunday. We take a shower together, which we often do. I like kissing him in the shower, there's something about water that's nice, maybe the fact that we're clean and wet and that somehow makes skin taste delicious. My only regret about Sunday is that there is no sex. But we go to brunch at a place I like, and I like how sometimes we're just quiet. There's a lot we say to each other without speaking, even jokes. And then there's the little touches, little elbow rubs, little caresses from fingers. The food is good; I am happy. I drop him off for his library shift then, and that's the end of it.

I feel so exhilarated, and in a way exhausted. It's like being so happy for three days required effort and energy. I love winter days inside with good food and tv shows and cuddling and sex and books. I love sleeping next to his long body. I love being held by him, he's always so warm to me. I love how affectionate he is, even if it's not always with words. He always gives me sugar when I ask.

In the morning I talk about how I daydream of the future, about having a dog and a Subaru, about living in a fancy flat in Europe. I talk about my real dreams too, and the confusion around what to do with my life. He tells me about a place in Dar Es Salaam by the ocean, and with beautiful houses.

I add this to my list of fantasies, living with him on a beautiful beach, traveling to Ethiopia or the US or China for my coffee business, or maybe for some other supply chain or robotics business, him, the PI of a research lab, I'll teach as an adjunct sometimes. Maybe I'd own a 2-bedroom in Cambridge where we spent our late 20's gaining experience in America, and sometimes we'd spend part of year there, but of course most of winter would be in our Masaki home. We'll start as a young couple on that beachside house, I'd buy the Women national geographic coffee table book we read together once in a bookstore; I'd pick out beautiful, modern furniture pieces, many African-designed. Then our house might grow, from two to three and then four, or maybe we would move, but still our home base would be there, by the ocean. Maybe we'd vacation in Shanghai and Tokyo sometimes, and I could take him to all my favorite places in Asia.

I feel like I know, now, what it's like to be dating your best friend.