#even more oppo

[those-rainbow-ninjas]

scary robot boyfriend

[sandinthemachine]

i need star wars content focused on alien characters instead of boring humans come on disney stop being cowards

[nativehueofresolution]

homophobic shiv memes aside, i do think there is actually something interesting about how shiv interacts with her brothers' sexuality/implied queerness. with roman, she seized on his sexuality as potential weakness, painting him as a sexual deviant to logan and seemingly being the one to reveal to logan that roman has had sexual interactions with men as an attempt to bolster her status and gain leverage ('i mean i think it's a potential problem. there's issues, you know? everyone says that he used to get jerked off by his personal trainer, and now there's this gerri thing... it's a, it's a track record you know?'). she also later uses their father's disgust with roman to try to convince her brother to go against their dad ('rome, you know dad is never going to choose you, because he thinks there's something wrong with you' --an ambiguously worded line but one i think in the context of what had just happened prior to that scene where logan literally asked roman 'are you scared of pussy, son?' during their last conversation, this makes the most sense as a reference to his sexuality).

she also just straight up uses the fact that he Does Not Fuck to be mean when she's annoyed with roman ('you can't hide under the covers with mommy... someday you know you're gonna have to actually fuck something.' a remark that connor and arguably kendall -depending on how sincere you think his comments to shiv are - immediately clock as being over the line, while shiv plays coy and pretends to not understand why roman's upset). it's a vulnerability for her to exploit. (though it's also interesting to note her success with this tactic is limited. logan is furious with roman, but he still brushes shiv off after she outs roman. roman's queerness may disqualify him, but it doesn't change the fact shiv is a woman and so was never a real option to start with.)

the possibility of kendall's queerness, on the other hand, seems more to strike her as a threat, the most obvious example being her already infamous face during the 'you kiss guys on molly' scene. regardless of how much you want to read that as a confirmation of a relationship between kendall and stewy (and i personally am inclined to take it as such), the basic facts are that kendall is attempting to cozy up to stewy and specifically bringing up his attraction to men on molly as something that makes stewy mundane rather than an edgelord, and shiv shows visible discomfort at kendall's blasé attitude and his intimacy with stewy. the director mark mylod has pointed to the scene in particular during multiple interviews as one of the earliest signs of shiv's wobbling, because she sees upfront the closeness between kendall and stewy and how she 'could be sidelined by that relationship'.

it's interesting that this comes after the past few episodes spotlighted kendall's relationship with nate, shiv's ex and the guy who - apart from stewy and possibly the waiter - has the most gay subtext with kendall. in 4x08, the fact that kendall was close enough to nate that he would call him to double check shiv's story and that nate, either on purpose or unknowingly, revealed shiv was lying, ended up destroying her only chance of staving off the mencken call. while the scene itself has nothing to do with sexuality, shiv's goals were undermined because of an existing relationship between kendall and nate. her relationships as a sister and a lover did not give her enough sway to stop the interaction from playing out as it did. as the lone female, shiv is constantly shut out by the homosocial spaces that exist in the business world that she cannot access (we see kendall and roman do business deals in the men's room more than once). still, we have seen with nate in particular shiv is sometimes able to use her sexual appeal to try and achieve her goals (flirting with nate to try and get him to do oppo research on marcia for example), even if it is not her preferred way to deal with things. but if kendall is also able to attract men, this is another way in which he's competing with her, and one she feels poised to lose at because kendall already has access to men in a way she can't in their spheres, and she's seen over and over the bond between men prioritized above all else. she's already inclined to think kendall will sideline her for a man he wants to keep on his good side - she just lived through roman as co-ceo - and now during their meeting with stewy she sees kendall show an easy familiarity with stewy's sexual history with men that he uses to butter him up. even if she isn't taking that to mean they've personally slept together (and i think she is), she's being reminded that kendall is someone who can form intimate relationships with other men (in contrast to roman, who is kind of repressed about it) and use that to his advantage, which undercuts her already limited influence. it's just the eternal boys club taken to another level.

[sprout-fics]

The Hunt

König x 'Maus' F!Reader

(Part 13 of 'Little Mouse')

Word Count: 5.3k Rating: Mature Tags: Stealth missions, Banter, Cat and Mouse, Hypothermia, Sharing body heat, Cuddling, Snuggling, Angst Warnings: None A/N: Thank you for staying with the series despite the break!

You're starting to think you might die out here.

It's been hours since you three dropped into the Kazakhstan mountains, just narrowly avoiding an incoming snowstorm that has since painted the steep mountains white. The air is thick with the blank, icy taste of snow, and you struggle to catch Soap and Ghost in their snowgear as they ascend up the cliff to the remote radio tower station that is the source of your intel. They're strong, clambering up the slope one at a time while the other watches their six. You supervise them from afar, perched on a cliff opposite of the valley, trying to catch sight of them despite the curtain of white that falls between you. 

Laswell was the one to point you here, as she usually does. The station chief has been combing through intelligence for months, searching for breadcrumbs on Makarov. The man is a ghost in the wind, vanished from prison and now hiding secretly as he plots his next move. He could be anywhere in the world. Your hunt for him had been delayed by your tangle with KorTac, but now even they seem to have vanished into the breeze with nary a trace.

You adjust your scope, zooming in on the sight of Soap and Ghost perching on a cliff edge, shoulders heaving with exertion. You smirk under your snow mask and sweep your sights further up the slope towards the target they are ascending towards. 

The tower itself is unassuming, a lone and decrepit thing in the middle of nowhere. Yet all it had taken was a single errant ping from a satellite to realize the traffic out of this seemingly normal outpost was far larger than originally thought. It could be nothing, it could be everything, but one thing remains clear, and it's the message Laswell managed to pull and decipher from a single static transmission, letters spelled out in Russian.

KorTac.

It's the first lead you've had in over a month. The mercenary group had seemingly gone underground following your raid on their satellite base. By the time Laswell had managed to pull an order to survey the site via drone footage, there was nothing left. The entire place had been burnt to the ground, devastated, nothing but ashes to comb through in search of answers. Since then the group had vanished, gone in the wind. Not defeated, but biding their time, waiting in the dark and drawing plans that would eventually come to full fruition. 

"Bravo 09, this is Bravo 07, how copy?"

You barely catch a glimpse of Ghost as he raises a hand to his headset. The transmission is tinted with static due to the snowstorm, but you can still make out the low, hushed accent of  the older man's voice as he checks in.

"Got you in my scope, 07." You report back, mouth moving behind your snowmask, wet with condensation. You shiver, feeling half an inch of snow on your back, not moving from your sniper position, ready to wait here hours more if need be. You hope for the sake of your fingers and toes it doesn't come to that.

"It's cold as balls out here, LT." You grouse in addition, and you see Soap's head tilt towards Ghost as he regards his partner.

"My balls are cold." Johnny agrees irritably, but there's a touch of playfulness there that hasn't been dampened by the snow.

“Feeling a little shriveled, Johnny?” You snark crudely, and hear the Scot make an indignant little scoff in return.

"Focus, both of you." Ghost snaps, to which you both silence yourselves with a snicker. "We're almost at the perimeter. We'll be going radio dark after that."

"Copy." You reply, adjusting your scope with numbing fingers to focus on the steel fence that surrounds the radio tower and the adjoining building. "Good hunting, you two."

Neither Soap or Ghost reply, focusing instead on climbing the last few ledges on the opposite side of the mountain. You watch as they take a break at the top, crouched near the edge. Eventually you hear Ghost’s voice filter over the comms. 

“Break’s over, Johnny.”  Ghost declares, and stands, offering him a hand and hauling Soap up so they advance forward along the slippery, snow laden cliffside. An incoming wall of white obscures your view of them as they round the edge towards the fence, and you hear one last garbled transmission from Ghost before they vanish.

It’s silent after that, with nothing but the wind howling in your ears and prickling under your skin. Even with your thick, downy parka there’s little respite from the bone biting chill that seeps into your veins. Perched in place as you are on overwatch, you know there’s no moving until your two comrades find their way out to you once more. 

So you huddle in, ignoring the chatter of your teeth and trying to steady your hands on the rifle, hoping and praying that the chamber doesn’t freeze, and that you won’t need to use it. The cold grips tight to your veins, and you try to imagine the lulling warmth of a campfire that you can’t afford. 

Hurry back. You think towards your two comrades. Before I fucking freeze to death.

There’s a tinny sort of whine in your radio, and you shift to adjust so the transmission comes through.

"Bravo team, this is Watcher-01, do you read me?" Laswell's voice comes in, tinny and crackling but still recognizable.

You blink, brow knotting. Laswell had signed off shortly before your parachute jump into the mountains. Whatever has caused her to reach out like this must be urgent. Maybe the tower is a bust, and she's decided to pull you from the mission. 

Ghost and Soap don't respond, and you think they might have already switched off their radios. So instead, after a pause, you respond in their stead. 

"This is Bravo 09, send traffic Watcher."

There's a pause before Laswell responds. "Bravo 09, advise all stations we may have KorTac operatives in the field."

You suck in a breath, feel cold air seize your lungs and descend into your veins with icy realization. If KorTac is here, then that means this tower is much more important than originally thought. You haven't run into any members of KorTac since Price's rescue, which means...

He could be here.

You store the thought as quickly as it came, trying to find Soap and Ghost against the rocky outcrop, only to come up empty handed. 

"Copy, Watcher. Ghost and Soap have gone radio silent." You report with a little grunt of frustration, knowing the two of them have already made their way inside. It could be too late, they might have found out the hard way just what waits for them. “They’ve likely breached the perimeter.”

"Then keep an eye out, Rookie, we need to-"

You blink as static garbles Laswell's next words, swallowing them with a crackle that fades to a high pitched whine.

"Watcher, repeat." You try, leaning a hand up to your headset to try and regain the signal.

Static.

"Laswell?"

Silence.

The storm must have knocked out the signal, which does not bode well for your mission. You try once more to raise Soap and Ghost, to no avail. You breathe in and quell the uncertain flutter of your heartbeat, feeling a familiar sense of knowing dread thrum low through your chest. The extrasensory insight you rely on to discern the state of the world around you hums with warning, does little to ease the low roll of your stomach. 

It's fine, you tell yourself. Soap and Ghost have handled far worse than this. You weren't there for Las Almas, having joined the team only after, but you heard the story from Johnny. Barely armed, pursued, injured, out of supplies and ammo, and yet somehow they had survived. This, with them well armed and in pursuit, should be no challenge. 

It takes a few minutes to repeat this to yourself, but it does nothing to relax the anxious, knowing pulse of sixth sense that hovers in the back of your mind. 

When the radio crackles again you nearly jump, muttering a transmission before anything can come through. 

"Laswell, do you copy?"

Static. 

Then, a different voice. 

"Hello, Maus."

If you were cold before, the voice that filters through your radio sends you hurtling into hypothermia, jolting at the familiar, purring intonation of the man who has long since pursued you.

“König.” You breathe, unable to contain the shocked breathlessness from your voice.

“Long time no see, as they say.” He murmurs, and you can hear the low, sultry delight of his voice at your response. You should have stayed quiet, shouldn’t have spoken, switched to another channel to get a hold of Laswell, tried to reach Soap and Ghost to tell them to retreat. 

“What are you doing here?” You hiss instead, gritting your chattering teeth. 

“I could ask you the same thing. You’re a long way from home, aren’t you, fraulein?”

You don’t respond to that, too busy trying to ignore the way the KorTac operative’s voice itches pleasantly under your skin. It’s a vain betrayal, and you internally chastise yourself for remembering the darkness of the supply closet that accompanied your last rendezvous, the soft, yearning words between you. You’ve tried to lock away the memory of it, the way his voice rumbled softly down at you with a traitorous promise that you know will mean the end of you both.

"I might try and kill you again." You breathe, voice wavering as you desperately try to reign in the wickedness of your heart. "I can't promise you I won't succeed."

"You won't." He tells you, and his voice is resolute. There is no uncertainty, no hidden conviction in the utter confidence of which he speaks. "You can try, Maus. You won't be able to."

"And if I don't?”

König blinks at you, eyes fluttering shut for all of a moment before he speaks.

"Then we'll be here again." He murmurs, and you want to shudder at the sudden softness of his voice, allowing that forbidden thing inside you to stretch forward into him. "Again and again, Maus. Over and over until one of us surrenders." 

You’ve tried to forget in his absence, shutting out the way you’d closed your eyes when he had tried to kiss you, vainly attempting to replace it with the knowledge that he’s tried to kill your friends, that he was responsible for Price’s capture, for your capture so long ago. In the weeks he’s been gone you’ve curled silently into your bunk, trying to convince yourself how wrong, how selfish you are for allowing yourself to harbor feelings for him. 

Now, when he’s here, now that his voice purrs into your radio with that beloved endearment, Maus, you find your steadfast resistance crumbling down around you like snow shifting on the mountains- preceding an avalanche. 

“I missed you, Maus.”

It sounds almost like a whine, a needy thing that would be pouting if there wasn’t an undertone of secret, gleeful intent beneath.

Don’t. You remind yourself, body scrunching tight as you try to control your breathing so he doesn’t hear your shuddering exhale. 

“Where are your friends?” You ask instead, voice even, flat.

He’s silent then, and you swear the absence of his words speaks of disappointment.

“That’s not how this works, Maus.” He replies, voice betraying his discontent.

You snort. “Tell me then, how does this work?”

There’s a strange crackling sound over the radio, and if you listen closely you can hear him chuckle.

“It works. Just with you and me.”

You let out a freezing breath at that, and you know it crackles over the comms towards him. You’re silent, but it’s different now as you begin to ease from your original surprise. Against your better judgment, you allow yourself to be soothed by the gentle tenor of his voice, allow yourself to remember what it felt like to nearly be kissed by him. The phantom touch of his knuckles under your chin, tipping you up towards him ghosts across your skin with a wicked, traitorous temptation. 

“What are you doing out here, Maus?” König asks, and it's more like a sigh, a reminiscent thing that seems to recall your previous wayward parting. 

“Recon.” You tell him flatly, refusing to divulge any more details lest it compromise your mission. 

“Alone?”

You think of Soap and Ghost struggling up the cliff side, vanishing in a cloud of white towards the perimeter of the radio tower. He can’t be allowed to know they’re here. God only knows what may happen to them, to him if they find each other.

“Yes.” You breathe, but your hesitation betrays your lie for what it is.

König hums in consideration, and you know him well enough by now to know the narrowing of his eyes, the slight tilt of his head as he weighs your words. 

“I think you’re lying, Maus.” He intones, and you stiffen at that, at the small whisper of threat that lingers in his voice- the sound of a man born and bred to kill, to hunt and maim. 

You, in your naive fantasies, forgot he too was a hunter. 

“I think your friends are here.” He goes on, voice low with danger, and you feel your muscles go taut, eyes wide and shoulders stiff. “Should I go say hello?”

“I’m alone.” You tell him again, but your voice is a thin, desperate thing, caught tight in your chest. 

König chuckles, as if he finds your rising panic amusing.

“A joke, Maus.” He explains, and it does little to relieve you, not with the way it failed to sound like anything other than a threat.

“But...” He continues, his voice hanging between you like suspended frost. “I guess if you are alone, you wouldn’t mind company, mm?”

You close your eyes, scrunching them shut at the way your heart clenches with an excitement you shouldn’t feel. The idea of his touch on you again is both exhilarating and terrifying- like drinking poison just because you love the taste. He’s a venom that slips into your veins, purrs under your skin and warms you through even as you burn from the inside out.

The logical part of you knows to refuse him. Yet there’s also a chance that if he remains where he is, he has a very good chance of bumping into Ghost and Soap, which is the absolute last thing you need right now- for the mission, and for yourself. You need to draw him from the tower, away from the others.

“You’re welcome to.” You purr back, refusing to show your wavering voice. “That is...if you can find me.”

He pauses at that, and you wonder if he expected you to refuse him and instead pleasantly surprised. 

“A game?” He asks, and you hear the rising excitement in his voice, like a predator who has caught the scent of something delicious. “And my prize?”

You huff at that, oddly endeared by his sadistic sort of playfulness. “I suppose you’ll have to find out, König.” You reply, voice low with promise.

“You’re a vexing woman, Maus.”

Thank God Laswell can’t hear this.

“Try and find me if you can.” You goad, narrowing your scope on the fence perimeter where Ghost and Soap have yet to emerge. “Good luck.”

“Oh I won’t need luck.” He purrs, and you shiver.

“Then I’ll see you soon.” You reply, and switch the channel on your radio off. 

Silence follows, and you release a deep, slow exhale to steady yourself. The snow muffles all sound, even the thump of your heartbeat as it beats unevenly against your tender ribs. You try to tame the excitement that hums inside you, forcing yourself into stillness until the cold embraces you again.

It’s unlikely he’ll be able to find you, buried as you are. You’ve allowed snow to accumulate on your back and legs, slowly engulfing your pale snow gear in a further camouflage. You’ve been here for well over an hour, and can stay much longer than that if you need. Not moving, barely breathing. Still and silent in the way snipers are, waiting for your chance to pull the trigger.

There’s a part of you that hopes he finds you, somehow. It’s a selfish, dangerous thing, fed by the excitement of hearing from him for the first time in weeks, scratching the itch you’ve desperately been trying to bury inside yourself. It’s the thing you’ve felt for a while now, a secret desire that betrays all the values and loyalty you hold dear to.

The desire to be caught.

You scrub a snow laden hand across your face, hoping somehow the frost will clear your mind of traitorous thoughts. You need to focus on the mission- ensuring that Soap and Ghost make it to the extraction point without anyone tailing or firing after them. You drew König out not because you wanted to see him, but because you were trying to protect your teammates from an enemy operative. That’s all this is. No wayward, illicit romance, no purring over the comms and suggestive flirtations, and certainly no memories of staring up at your enemy in a dark room and hoping he would find the courage to kiss you.

For fuck’s sake, get a hold of yourself.

You push the image away as far as you can, and train your scope once more on the ice laden cliff across the narrow valley.

It’s quiet in the minutes that follow, and you feel the heavily falling snow continue to pack along your spine. You try to contain your chattering teeth and shivering hands, noting with irritation the undue wobble of your scope as you sweep your sights across the landscape-

What?

A shape, there and gone in a mere moment, vanishing along the narrow path off to your right in a cloud of white. You’re certain you saw something, but when you train your sights, there’s nothing there.

Maybe...

You should move to a better position.

It might be a good idea. The motion would heat up your trembling, frigid limbs, and the snow would hopefully cover any tracks you leave behind. Yet there’s risks of doing so. The second you move, even with your snow camouflage, there’s a risk of being spotted by the operative hunting you through the snow.

You purse your chapped, cold lips under your snow mask, and weigh your options.

-and that’s when you hear the sound behind you.

You flip over quickly, reaching for your side arm, but the weapon is buried against your side in the snow, and as you fumble for it a huge, towering figure lurches into view.

“Found you, Maus.” König rumbles as he steps from behind a tree, and before you can bite a reply, try to raise your silenced pistol, you freeze.

“What-” You manage, a little forced, blinking. “What are you wearing?”

König pauses mid-step as he stalks towards you, eyes wide under his hood. Your question catches him off guard, and he glances down at himself in confusion. His hood, normally a dark, ominous black, is now a strangely, ghostly gray that matches his long, snow-white layers and tan tac vest. Black boots and thick gloves are tugged over his pants and sleeves, but his helmet remains the same.

“...You don’t like it?” He asks, and you laugh out of pure disbelief.

“I-” You try, side arm now forgotten. “Yes?”

You shake yourself, and reach once more for your weapon.

“Ah-” König tuts, quickly moving forward too fast and gently placing a boot over your arm. “Please don’t, Maus.”

You frown at him, try and wiggle your arm, only for him to increase the weight on it. “Asshole.” You seethe, and König huffs an indignant little sound. “What if I said that was your prize?”

“A bullet?” He tilts his head at you. “You shouldn’t have.”

“No, I really should.” You insist past chattering teeth, and tug more severely at his ankle despite your heavy, shivering limbs.

He watches you struggle in vain, and you hate the amused little glint in his eyes.

Finally, you flop back into the snow, winded.

“I won.” He provides smugly, and you punch at his calf in one more outraged attempt to dislodge him, with no success.

“So what then?” You seethe. “Are you going to capture me again?”

“No.”

You blink, look up at him, startled by the sudden severity of his tone. He bites out the word like you’ve insulted him, sneering and dangerous. You’d only sort of been joking, but the reflexive refusal that you’ve managed to elicit has you pause, considering.

“We’re...past that, Maus.” He goes on, voice softer. The boot eases from your arm a bit. “I thought we agreed on that much.”

"Some things are more beautiful when they are free, Maus."

It’s difficult to decide how you feel about that.

Part of you is relieved that König has decided to forego the obsession of capturing you. For reasons still unknown to you, O’Connor had kept Price alive during his captivity. You have a feeling that for you, your fate at the hands of KorTac would be far less kind. Held by ransom at best, an unmarked grave at worst, it’s fortunate for you that the Austrian towering above you has decided much the same.

Yet you also wish somehow things could go back to what they were- simpler. König trying to take you alive, and you- trying to kill him for it. Instead, the haunting memory of the darkness inside the storage closet of the KorTac base, of how you’d almost let him kiss you, of how you saw his face, remains a treacherous addiction you desperately try to rid yourself of. Now, this, whatever it is, seems to have spiraled beyond your reach, unable now to discern the lines between villain and dangerous ally, a balance you fail to reconcile with every frost-bitten breath inside your chest.

You try to force a glare up at him, but instead feel your expression cast between dismay and doubt, a visage that he absorbs and blinks slowly down at you.

“You’re shaking, Maus.” He notes quietly, voice barely audible above the ice-laden wind. “Are you afraid?”

“No.” You bite back, and that at least is the truth. “Just freezing my ass off.”

König tilts his head at you, and is silent for a moment, considering. Yet then you see his eyes behind the mask, crinkling at the edges as he smiles.

“Poor little liebling.” He coos, and you frown harder at that, the almost condescending dip of his voice. Yet before you can protest König uses his boots to gently roll you onto your stomach back to the position you were at before, and then abruptly dropping his weight onto your back.

“W-what-” You croak in surprise, face warming as you try and squirm under the massive bulk of him pressed flat against your spine. “What are you doing?!”

“You said you were cold.” The giant above you reasons, settling in so he blankets you on all sides with his larger frame. “I’m just trying to keep you warm, Maus.”

Your brain short circuits, fizzling into nothingness as you battle the absolutely absurdity of the situation with the welcome body heat bleeding into your bones from above.

This is so beyond the field manual I might as well burn the thing.

König happily nuzzles into your back, trapping you underneath him. He arranges his arms in a cradle to rest your head in, his own cheek pressed to the nape of your neck with a pleased sigh.

You can’t even find the words to object to this bizarre development, eyes blinking dumbly into the wall of white that obscures the other side of the valley where Soap and Ghost have vanished to. You can only silently thank whatever higher power there is that they can’t see this- can’t see you as you find yourself cuddling with the enemy.

“I’ll take this as my prize.” König murmurs cheerfully, and you make a sound of utter disbelief, confused yet not entirely displeased at this development.

The more you fail to squirm free, the more heat radiates from the form of the soldier behind you, encasing you in a small cocoon of heat that blessedly chases above the shiver in your muscles. Slowly, you find yourself relaxing against him, taking in the warmth for all its worth and silently convincing yourself it’s just for survival.

Can’t RV if I’m hypothermic, after all. You try to reason, blatantly ignoring the tiny voice inside you that speaks otherwise.

“You’re keeping me alive.” You muse aloud, mouth partially covered by your snow mask and the cradle of his arms.

“I am.” König replies simply with a small shrug.

“Why?”

König pauses for a moment. You swear you feel him stiffen, feel the thump of his heartbeat pound between your shoulder blades as he attempts to summon an answer.

“Because I like you, Maus.” He tells you at last, soft and breathy in your ear. “I like you better alive.”

The cold air in your lungs seems to punch at the staccato rhythm inside your chest, forcing a cold intake of air that you pray he doesn’t notice.

“Since that first time we met.” König goes on, voice rumbling low from his chest into the warming dip of your spine. “I saw you, saw the way you fought, the way you...weren’t afraid. You were so soft and small in my arms...”

He trails off then, but when he resumes his musings he chuckles low against your nape. “You were like a little bird, but when you woke up it turned out you had fangs, Maus.”

You feel a small flush of pride at that, at the reminder of the way you had challenged him, had refused to back down despite the towering, intimidating stranger before you. In truth you’d been terrified, knowing your capture could have meant torture, even death, knowing that Gaz had been left behind bleeding and unconscious.

Gaz...

Your face falls in dismay.

What would he think of you like this? With the man who once had almost killed him? Who had dared to steal you away right in front of his eyes? What would he make of this? With you in the arms of an enemy, refusing to squirm free, to kill the man who had once helped kidnap Price.

...With a man who had saved your life more times than you could count?

“We can’t...do this.” You breathe quietly into the snow, eyes half lidded and scarcely gazing at the wall of white before you. “König...”

The man behind you is silent, and you know without seeing his eyes he’s taking in your words, thinking very much the same. Like you, König knows the danger of his fascination with you, the way he’s already betrayed his own company to aid you, to keep you safe. You both know that the lines you have both crossed betray the allies you’ve sworn yourselves to, caught in a dangerous abraxas that neither of you can control.

“Would you?” He asks in a whisper shielded by the wind. “If things were different, Maus?”

You close your eyes, feeling your chest clench with an emotion you dare not name. You should lie to him. You should tell him that this, this is something you never expected, something you can indulge in no longer. You should tell him next time that you won’t hesitate, that you’ll squeeze the trigger and watch this horrid affair finally come to its fateful, bloody conclusion.

Instead, you offer in a scarce whisper:

“Yes.”

There’s a long pause before König sighs behind you, his chest deflating into your spine and the warm breath of him spilling across your nape. You shiver under him, purely out of sensation rather than the cold, reminded of the intimacy of the position you two find yourselves in.

“What am I going to do with you, Maus?” He asks, and despite the melodrama involved you know it’s a genuine question- one you yourself have asked many, many times.

“We could go back to trying to kill each other.” You offer with feign cheerfulness.

“I never wanted to kill you, Maus.”

Right.

In some ways you wish he had. If König never had qualms about killing you, perhaps this could be avoided.

“You could desert.” You say suddenly, surprising yourself. “Defect and surrender to the 141.”

“Do you really think it’s that simple, Maus?” He asks, almost dismayed.

You know it’s not. With everything König has done, with the legacy he’s left on you and your teammates, you know they’d never trust him. Even if you explained to them that König wasn’t the monster they think he is, that he had never done the things they suspect him of, you know all you’d receive in return is your friends’ disbelief and distrust for lying to them, for asking them to trust the man who had once captured you.

The image of their faces, of the hurt and despair and disappointment etched across their eyes, is something you can hardly bear.

This is your fault, you think quietly, with dawning despair. You should have killed him long ago. You should have told your team. Perhaps they’d have forgiven you if you’d confessed, consoled you and told you that this was all just a horrible maladjustment to your capture back then. If you’d told them, if you’d killed him...

“Maus.” König observes at the small shuddering breath you draw in, emotions bubbling inside your chest.

If things were different, then somehow....maybe...

“Bravo-09, this is Bravo-07.”

You jolt, muscles seizing at the sudden staticky tenor of Ghost’s voice over your comms. König braces on his forearms to allow you to scramble for your radio, voice breathless as you respond.

“Go ahead Bravo-07.”

“Sweep cleared. Proceeding to rally point Alpha. Fifteen minutes.”

“Good copy, LT. Are you being followed?”

A pause, then. “Negative, Bravo-09. Place was empty. Looks like they’d just burned it.”

You blink, then twist towards König.

“You bastard.” You manage, eyes wide as you realize what he’s done. “This was a distraction.”

König’s eyes soften with a remorse that fails to quell the anger warming in your veins.

“A necessary one, Maus.” He offers simply, removing the weight of his body from yours. You twist onto your back to face him, a mixture of rage and hurt written clear across your face. König towers above you, a massive shadow that easily dwarfs your prone form.

“You’re lucky you and your friends came when you did. A day earlier and you’d all be dead.”

“Why?” You manage, voice strangled. “Why distract us?”

“You know I can’t tell you that, Maus.” He offers, almost sadly. “We’re still enemies, after all.”

He steps away from you then, and even when you know he sees your hand reach for your sidearm, he doesn’t flinch. Instead he pauses, offers you a clear line of sight that would allow you to take the perfect shot at his turned back.

“...But maybe not forever.” He finally offers, and steps easily into the trees, vanishing.

You watch after him, expression pained, asking the snowy sky for answers it cannot yield.

In the place where he once was, your finger trembles on the trigger.

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[ourdawnishotterthanourday]

Forest Adventures: Exploring New Boundaries [M] — Kim Mingyu (TEASER)

✧ Because who said camping couldn’t be fun? ✧

— domestic au, camping au, SMUT [18+] (outdoor/public), fluff, established relationship; word count: 7k+ (subject to change)

Chubby female!reader x Husband!Kim Mingyu A camping trip is the last thing on your mind when your husband suggests taking you away for the weekend. But when you suddenly find yourself standing in the middle of the forest, it becomes clear that this is Mingyu’s way of cashing in the bet you made. Just one problem – you absolutely hate camping. So, now it is up to Mingyu to show you just how much fun camping with him can be.

✦ Teaser warnings: reader hates hates hates camping (honestly, same), mingyu being a little shit but also a cutie at the same time, mentions of bugs, mentions of anal — pls let me know if I missed any :) ✧ Teaser word count: 1.4k+ ♕ Shout out: thank you @forsythe-lll for proofreading babe!! ✎ Notes: 1. this is a continuation of my my other fic, a (w)hole new experience, but you can read it as a stand-alone too :) 2. teaser below the cut ^^ it's a bit long, but i'm sure no one will mind ;) i'm afraid it's going to be another monster fic arrrgh

“Kim Mingyu, this better be a damn joke or I swear you will be sleeping on the couch for a week.”

“What happened to being excited to go on a trip with me?!” your husband exclaimed with wide eyes, clearly surprised by your sudden threat.

“Exactly! A trip. One where we rent a hotel room or an apartment with a comfy bed and a proper bathroom. Not one where we sleep on the goddamn forest floor!” you nearly cried as your eyes scanned the trees and bushes surrounding the two of you. The light rustling of leaves here and there sent shivers up your spine as you imagined what kind of terrifying creatures could be hiding in there. You’d never been a fan of bugs, so being here, in the middle of the forest where they were no doubt crawling all over the place, definitely didn’t do your sanity any good.

Mingyu was very much aware of your little phobia. At least, until this moment that’s what you thought. Either he had mysteriously forgotten about it, or this was his way of pulling a prank just to get a reaction out of you. You doubted it was the first option, so you settled on the second one. Because you didn’t want to believe that your sweet husband, the one who always wanted nothing but the best for you, was really this cruel to put you through a full weekend of camping when he was well aware that this was the last thing you wanted to do.

But, upon hearing the words that left his mouth in the next moment, that little bit of hope you had started to crumble right in front of your eyes.

“You lost the bet, baby. And if I recall correctly, we decided that the loser will have to agree with whatever the winner wants,” your husband pointed out as he wrapped a comforting arm around your shoulder. Your body automatically stilled in response, everything suddenly falling into place. So that’s what this was all about. That stupid ramyeon contest you had suggested.

Looking back on it now, you just wanted to laugh at yourself for even thinking that you could have stood a chance against the Kim Mingyu. He was the better cook out of the two of you after all – something you should have known being his wife and all – so why did you have to open your big mouth and shoot yourself in the foot with that bet?

You definitely blamed it on the liquid courage of that night. There was just no way you would have suggested such a thing if you had been sober. Sober you knew damn well that no one had ever managed to beat your husband in a cook-off. Those who had tried had failed miserably, so what the hell had possessed you that night? The whole thing had literally been doomed from the start.

It had been nothing but a moment of weakness and right now, especially right now, you regretted it more than ever.

If you were honest, you had fully expected him to use his win as an opportunity to get you to do a striptease for him – a thing he had been begging for for a few weeks now. It wasn’t like you didn’t want to – because you were more than happy to do it – but you had wanted to save it for a special occasion. Though at this moment, you weren’t even sure whether he was ever going to receive that striptease. Because this? This certainly wasn’t it.

To say that you had been blindsided by his idea of a ‘fun trip’ was still putting it mildly. And the worst part was that you didn’t even have a say in the matter – a deal was a deal and that was that. Besides, you were pretty sure that your husband would never let you live it down if you tried to get out of it. You hadn’t forgotten about that time he made you eat a plate of escargots, all because you had refused to do a week of morning runs with him in the aftermath of another bet you’d lost – you really needed to stop making bets with your husband.

That memory alone was enough to make you think twice about stealing the keys and making a run for the car. Still, that didn’t mean that you couldn’t at least try to convince your husband that it wasn’t too late to change your plans. Yes, that’s how desperate you were.

“I’m aware of the rules we established, but… but you know I hate camping, especially the bugs that come with it. Why would you do this to me? Just why, Mingyu?” you whined, a little pout on your lips as you looked at the man beside you. 

“Trust me, baby. I’m gonna make it worth your while,” he assured you before gently tapping at your pouty bottom lip. He thought you looked absolutely adorable trying to get out of it. And although he hated to see you upset, he couldn’t help but enjoy it a little bit… maybe a little too much.

“You can make it worth my while by taking me to a nice hotel. Doesn’t that sound much better than this, hmm?”

Mingyu chuckled as he leaned in to kiss your cheek, “You’re not getting out of this,” he whispered, which was followed by a soft whine of defeat from your side. “You gotta try to explore new things. And what better way to do that with me, your husband?”

“I’m pretty open to anything but this. Do you seriously want me to sleep in a tent with you while we’re in the middle of nowhere? There are bugs everywhere! And what about snakes? Have you even thought of that?”

Mingyu playfully rolled his eyes at your dramatic display. “You haven’t even tried, baby,” he stated before his lips morphed into a devious smirk. “Besides, just a few weeks ago you thought you weren’t into anal either, but look at you now. You can’t get enough of my cock in your ass,” he winked as he lowered his arms to grab two handfuls of your plump ass.

“Shut up, Gyu,” you whined, trying to wiggle out of his grip. Despite the slim chance of you encountering another human being in the middle of the forest, you still felt at least a little embarrassed about your husband’s sudden show of affection. “That’s totally different and you know it.”

“Is it though? It’s just something unfamiliar right now. But who knows? You might like it more than you think.”

“I hate you,” you groaned, leaning your forehead against his chest as you thought it over. Technically he was right. You had never even given it a shot, so why was it so hard to just suck it up for a few days?

Mingyu laughed and gently put one of his hands underneath your chin to get you to look at him. “No you don’t. You love me.”

“After today, I’m not so sure anymore,” you mumbled, your lips shaping into yet another dramatic pout.

“At least promise me you’ll try. Please, baby. You owe me that much at least.”

You sighed deeply, still not entirely having convinced yourself. “I don’t know, Gyu.”

“I could always make you another plate of snails,” he teased, pinching your squishy cheeks in between his fingers.

Your eyes widened at the threat, your body tensing up at the same time as you immediately recalled the awful taste of the dish he’d prepared. “Oh hell no!” There was no way you were going to relive that shit again.

“Just kidding,” your husband grinned before he softly pecked your lips. “I was actually going to suggest taking you on a proper trip next month.”

That immediately got your attention, the threat he’d just made already long forgotten at the prospect of a more ‘luxurious’ trip in the near future. “You would?” Mingyu hummed in response, his dark brown orbs sparkling as he looked at you with adoration. “Ugh, I guess I can’t say no to that. It’s not like you’re going to let me leave anyway,” you finally sighed, accepting defeat. The only way you were going to get through this was to accept your fate and try to enjoy it.

“You know me so well, baby,” your husband smirked triumphantly.

“But if I die out here, I swear to god I will haunt you for the rest of your life,” you warned, jabbing your index finger into his toned chest.

He was quick to catch your finger and lifted it to place a gentle kiss on it. “As if I would ever let anything happen to my queen.”

“You better keep that promise, Kim Mingyu.”

“Trust me, baby. You won’t regret this.”

© All right reserved — ourdawnishotterthanourday // Please do not repost or edit any of my works without my permission!! If you see any of my works outside of this Tumblr, pls report it to me asap. Thank you in advance!

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[sunboki]

"Can you kiss me?" ⎯ a short Hyunjin fiction

Hwang Hyunjin x gn. reader

• trope. best friends to lovers, comfort

• word count. 0.75k

• warnings. almost smut(nothing detailed), reader’s drunk & wears makeup, dubcon

Hyunjin who, on his saturday night, did not expect to find you stumbling on his doorstep, wasted beyond belief and definitely not in the shape to be out alone so late.

Regarding your mumbling with a cocked brow, the man crosses his arms, nose wrinkling at the smell of alcohol attached to your clothing.

“Uh… You good there?” He questions, aware the answer is definitely no by the look of your smudged makeup and off-balance figure.

Carefully maneuvering you inside without falling over yourself, your best friend finally takes you into his arms, gently leading you to his bed.

“There we go.. Almost there—“ He mutters, helping you hop on the comfy mattress. Propping a pillow behind your head, you find yourself unconsciously leaning into him with your face smushed into his chest, basking in the warmth he emitted.

As for Hyunjin, he’s stunned seated on the edge of the bed by where you sit, freezing when you press against him.

Truth be told, you’re absolutely adorable all cozied up, and if his face didn’t give it away, his rampant heartbeat would.

Eyes dazed as you blink at him, you grace a sleepy smile, admiring the gorgeous man before you.

“Jinnie, I missed you today..” You murmur, and he has to crane to make out what you said, fingers softly threading strands of your hair away from your face. Abruptly, he halts, unable to contain the wobbly smile dancing along plush lips.

“Yeah? I missed you too,” Hyunjin responds, titling his head to fixate on your sweet face.

Testing the words on your tongue, your fuzzy mind debates on speaking up, phrase dancing so delicately on your tongue. Testingly.

“Jinnie,” You repeat, voice barely a whisper. “Can you kiss me?”

Now if saying you missed him shocked the man, asking him to kiss you sealed the deal. Taking a few moments to make sure he heard your right, he stops himself.

Sure he’s thought about it, but never actually considered it(or expected you to either). You’d always been friends, always been close, but never this close. So close, as he peers down at you, that he can see each individual eyelash decorating breathtaking eyes. So close that the urge becomes overwhelming. Because you’re so, so tempting.

He sighs, breath stifling in his chest. And although his control has always been impeccable when it comes to you, tonight, he can’t help himself.

So when your lips part once more, he leans down where you lay, gently tipping your head to the side to have easier access.

You taste of alcohol, and he decides if it were anyone else he would’ve jerked away. But it’s you, and he wouldn’t care even if there was fire surrounding your lips.

Pressing back into the pillow behind your head as he deepens the contact, you sigh between kisses, lips puffy and swollen from where he’s bitten and sucked.

Whining as he tugs on your bottom lip once more, your hands unconsciously find their way unbuttoning your already loosened top.

Quickly pulling away, he sends you a look reading “Are you okay with this?”, which earns frantic nods in return.

At the go-ahead, his fingers replace yours messily work the buttons of your top, small pops sounding between the sinful sound of your lips connecting and the soft whines uttered each time you both separate.

Arching into his touch while hot kisses trail down your collarbone, he attempts to lift the clothing over your head, both dissolving into laughter at his evident struggle.

That was until he became frustrated and resorted to pulling you into his lap instead, fingers dancing along the bare skin of your hips. Simply staying there, admiring you in your dazed glory along with his work decorating your neck, bitten lips and half-lidded eyes.

He can’t seem to get enough.

“‘Keep kissing me and ‘m gonna fall asleep..” As opposed to how much the situation had escalated beforehand, he can’t help but smile at your whisper, landing a small peck on the edge of your lips.

“Mmm, fall asleep when you want, love.” He assures, heart-eyed gaze soaking up the way you begin to sleepily rock.

Hands held in his on either side of you, your head eventually finds itself thumping onto his chest, fast asleep.

And despite how you’re half-naked, mere minutes from taking an entirely new step with him and looking worse for wear with dark mascara running beneath your eyes, Hyunjin’s certain he’s never felt more infatuated with you.

sunboki, may 2022 ©

[helloaugustmoon]

shamelessly inspired by this tiktok because my goodness?? the ENERGY. whEW.

Michael Jackson x she/her!reader

·˚ ◌༘͙[Privacy] ! ˊ

Every reporter hopes and prays for the opportunity to interview a man like Michael Jackson; not out of sincere interest or intention, for the most part, it is entirely for their own gain. To rephrase: every reporter hopes and prays for the opportunity to find out something about a man like Michael Jackson that nobody else has publicized, making them the first to exploit the new - and most likely, private - piece of information for their own notoriety. Being aware of this, Michael and his management preface every interview agreement with the clarification that any reporter who is given such an opportunity is required to list the intended questions for Michael, allowing him to choose which questions he then consents to answering on record. That said, there are instances where reporters simply can’t help themselves, so desperate for the scoop that they cannot resist asking a forbidden question. This particular interview is one in which Michael can foresee that very event occurring.

Of course, Michael didn’t miss the way the reporter’s eyes glinted when he glanced at you, then down at your left hand, to find an engagement ring. It’s to be expected. If you or Michael didn’t want your engagement to be publicised, you’d have kept the ring hidden, or removed it entirely. However, that didn’t warrant anyone to press further into the matter, or into your relationship.

“He’s going to ask.” You whisper into Michael’s ear when he leans down to kiss your cheek, moments before he’s due to head in front of the cameras and begin the interview.

“For the sake of his career, I’ll hope he won't.” Michael whispers to you in kind, leaving another lingering kiss on your cheek, the disguised threat in his words making you giggle.

A pacifist through and through, but when it comes to you? He’ll find every non-violent means of protecting you in this life and the next.

With a smile directed at you, Michael slips his sunglasses back on - hiding his eyes when you’re not the only soul to see them - and steps in front of the camera, sitting down in a chair placed center-frame. The camera starts rolling, the interview begins, and everything seems to be going as planned; the reporter is sticking to the questions Michael had circled - a copy of said list held tightly in your hands as you stand behind the camera, Michael having discussed each question with you prior to circling them, because in his words, “We’re a team, baby. Anything you don’t want out there, won’t be out there.”

Continuing down the list of questions, you take a deep breath, knowing that the very next question is the one you and Michael had been anticipating, and had specifically not consented to as part of this interview. The moment the reporter starts speaking again, your eyes widen.

“So, Michael, I feel I can’t continue this interview without addressing the elephant in the room; your beautiful fiancé is here with us!” The reporter exclaims, and Michael has to lift a hand to cover his mouth in an effort to hide his amusement.

“Yes, my fiancé is here- not that she’ll appreciate being referred to as the ‘elephant in the room’.” Michael responds, and from behind the camera, you can’t help rolling your eyes fondly. It was a bad choice of words from the reporter, nothing more, but Michael won’t even let that slide when it comes to you.

“Ah! My apologies, definitely wasn’t my intention! All the same, I’d like to say congratulations to the happy couple-“ The reporter continues, but Michael is quick to ever so politely interject.

“Thank you.” He says softly, in the hopes the reporter will move onto the next question. No such luck.

“And I can’t help asking the burning question, the one that’ll be on everyone’s minds from the moment they find out about this joyous occasion: when can we expect some…tiny dancers, shall we sa-“ The reporter is leaning forward in his chair opposite Michael, so thirsty for every facet of the response he can get from him.

This time, Michael’s interjection is less polite, and intended as a direct interruption.

“I did not circle that question.” He raises a hand pointedly, as if to chastise the reporter, but there’s a well placed smile on Michael’s face, and you’re hiding a smirk behind your hand.

If those sunglasses weren’t covering his eyes, you know there’d be a glint in his eyes that you could spot from a mile away.

“Sorry, sorry, couldn’t resist!” The reporter laughs, trying to play off Michael’s clear disapproval.

Keeping professionalism, Michael only nods in response, and the interview continues. It remains respectful from that point on, but the damage is done. In a matter of minutes, the interview is over, but it isn’t until the cameras are confirmed to have stopped rolling that Michael crosses one leg over the other and clasps his hands over his lap, staring intently at the reporter.

“Thanks so much for giving me this opportunity, I really do appreciate it.” The reporter gushes, and Michael nods slowly.

“That’s alright, not a problem. So long as you cut from the point you referred to my fiancé, until the next question I consented to you asking.” Michael says, his voice soft as ever, but sentiment firm; it’s not a request.

“Oh! O-Of course!” The reporter’s eyes widen.

“Good. An assistant of mine will stick around to check the cut version, but do apologize to whoever’s tasked with editing the footage down - I don’t mean to waste their time, but it’s like I said: I didn’t circle that question. It’d be in your best interest to resist, next time.” With a deliberately casual shrug, Michael rises from his chair and walks past the camera, over to you. He places a hand against the small of your back out of habit, bringing you a warm smile.

“Next time?” The reporter asks, his eyes lighting up.

Naturally, that’s what he chooses to focus on; his next opportunity to leech from Michael.

“Yes, next time. Not with me, of course. I don’t make friends of those who make any kind of comparison between the love of my life, and an elephant. Take care.” With a gentle squeeze of your hip, Michael nods curtly at the reporter and guides you out of the room.

Naturally, you are reeling from that interaction, seeing your fiancé as heated and icy in equal measure as you’ve ever seen him. It isn’t until the two of you are seated in the back of Michael’s limousine with his hand holding yours to his lap, that you find your voice.

“Thank you. You didn’t have to do all that, you know.” You tell him softly, an almost shy smile on your face.

Removing his sunglasses and setting them down, Michael returns your smile and meets your eyes.

“I did, baby, I did. I told you: anything you don’t want getting out there, won’t get out. My boundaries may have been a playground for the press since I was young, but yours will be respected like a temple.” His voice is as tender and sweet as it always is when he talks to you. Using his free hand, Michael gently tips your head and places a soft kiss on your forehead, his thumb caressing yours.

While Michael’s threat lingered in the intricacies of his instruction and dismissal of the reporter, his team won’t be as respectful; that reporter will be added to the list that is watched by a dedicated team under Michael, who are handed a lawsuit faster than they can stammer out an apology, should they choose to speak on their ‘slip-ups’ during their interviews with Michael. At his instruction, of course, but that’s a side of his business he doesn’t necessarily need to share with you. All you need to know is that he takes care of you in every possible way that he can, and should anyone test that, Michael will take every opportunity and non-violent avenue to reinforce your boundaries. It is fair to say that when it comes to you, every reporter underestimates just how far Michael will go to protect you from the vultures that have attacked him for as long as he can remember. You will live a fairytale each and everyday, and anyone who tries to jeopardize that will face the true scale of the power that places Michael so high amongst the targets of the press.

[voidartisan]

Welp. It's the end of the semester again, so...

Jedi Council (& Co.) as Things That Have Been Said in My Classes or Apartment

(very long post incoming)

Mace: Obviously this is God's favorite dinosaur

Plo: I will pardon the mime

Obi-Wan: If God punches you in the face, then you deserved it.

Shaak Ti: Did you just misgender my plant?

Sasee Tiin: Never give up on your dreams kids, but remember to lower your expectations.

Obi-Wan: Bless his FLIPPIN' soul

*During a training exercise* Mace: Do you have a girlfriend? Fives: No Mace: Well today you do Fives: Awesome, thank you

Obi-Wan: I'm running on happy thoughts and ibuprofen and I'm running out of both

Plo: Would you like to jaywalk with me?

Even Piell: You're going places, kid. Maybe jail.

Yoda: Willing to steal another, I am

Mace: You know what the best way to avoid Alzheimer's is? Caleb:...exercise? Mace: Die young

Shaak Ti: I'm not sure I would trust anyone with my baby. Especially not a man in tights.

Plo: Last time I got in trouble for using the word "quirky." Ahsoka: No, you got in trouble for applying it to the Trade Federation

Kit Fisto: I'm really glad that oranges are one of the foods that have peels. I mean, look at this thing. If it were just left on the tree it would be unusable. I'm kind of surprised more things don't have peels. Depa: I don't know, I feel like a lot of foods have peels Kit: Kit: Oh maker, you're right. This is blowing my mind. Name one food without a peel. Depa: Doritos Kit: You got me there

Ahsoka, struggling with homework: Brains are hard. Yoda: Hrm. Squishy, I thought they were.

Kit, sitting down between Anakin and Padme: Forget leave room for Jesus, leave room for Kit. Every relationship could use a little more Kit.

Depa: Welp. Made direct eye contact with THAT person out the window

Plo: Would you like to be my adopted daughters? Trace: I mean...sure? Plo: Great! You're in.

Anakin, picking a piece of strawberry up off the floor: Do I have to throw this away now or can I just rinse it off and eat it? Ahsoka: I think that's up to you. Obi-Wan: Risk-reward, Anakin. It's just a piece of strawberry. Anakin: Risk *pops strawberry into mouth* Obi-Wan: THAT'S NOT WHAT THAT MEANS

Quinlan: What the fo' shizzle is goin' on in the House of the Commons my dude?

Mace: There's something about putting artichoke on pizza that feels...unethical

Anakin: You're crazy Obi-Wan: I respect your choice Anakin: I don't

Depa: My onion is growing another onion Mace: Congratulations, you're a grandmother

Kit: It ended in a dance party. All the best movies end in dance parties, like Shrek, Shrek 2---

Mace: I am suspicious of the powders

Oppo Rancis: I can't think of his name. There was this senator, he lied and cheated his way into office--- Obi-Wan: Which one?

Depa: I put so much garlic in this it's hurting my eyes. I can't wait to eat it.

Obi-Wan: I'm having an existential crisis. Yoda: *plays Dancing Queen by ABBA*

[david-talks-sw]

For a lot of fans, the "Jedi lost their way" take really comes down to:

"I never saw the Jedi Council genuinely be kind to Anakin in any meaningful way, so I just filled in the gaps and assumed they were dicks to him".

From there you get the myths that the Jedi manipulated him, only cared for him because of his power, forbid him from seeing his Mom, Mace in particular hated him, etc etc.

Well, quick reminder: in George Lucas' script, Anakin refers to the Jedi as his family.

But hey, if "not enough evidence" is a factor, how would we fix that?

PITCH: A five-issue comic book miniseries, featuring self-contained tales of young Anakin's interactions with various Jedi - seen from their POVs - about how they all come around to liking him, only to epilogue each issue with events from Episode III.

Not all of these are fully developed, but just to give you an idea...

Issue #1: Yoda.

Lesson: "letting to of what you fear to lose"

Set only months after Episode I, Obi-Wan is off on a mission, and Anakin is shadowing Yoda, for the day. Both are reluctant...

Yoda is still grappling with Anakin's uncertain future, maybe reeling from Qui-Gon's death and Yaddle's disappearance.

Anakin misses his Mom, and the last conversation he had with Yoda was the elf telling him he shouldn't be scared for his mother (or so Anakin thinks).

Throughout the day, shenanigans ensue.

Yoda takes Ani to a Council meeting and he keeps interrupting by asking Yarael Poof why his neck is so long, or asking Oppo Rancisis if he ever trims his hair. Giggles from all but Yoda.

Yoda mediates a negotiation between Senators and the subject of Malastare podracing comes up, so Anakin hijacks the meeting.

Yoda goes to Thustra to fight off mercenaries for the King and Anakin tags along, seemingly becoming a burden for Yoda.

However, despite their bumpy start (Anakin being a brat and Yoda being a grump) Anakin and Yoda bond and Anakin's input seemingly becomes the key to the mission's success.

Yoda discovers he admires Anakin's outside-the-box thinking and finds kindness deep in his heart. The issue's narrative voice is Yoda talking to Qui-Gon, noting how similar Anakin and Qui-Gon are.

Anakin realizes that Yoda trained the master who trained the master who trained his master... so that makes him his sort of grandpa! That's so wizard!

Once the task at hand is over, Yoda and Anakin have a moment and talk about the idea that Anakin misses his mother.

Yoda comforts Anakin, explaining that his mother let him leave the nest, and in life things come and go, things which they may grow to care for. But as Jedi, they must be able to let go of these attachments, when the time comes.

Anakin asks if Yoda ever lost someone he cared about. Yoda answers that he's almost 900, by now. A lot of loved ones of his came and went. Qui-Gon was one of them. Yaddle, too. Another one (thinking of Dooku)... still hurts to this day.

One day, it'll be up to him to be as strong as his mother, who Yoda adds might've made a wonderful Jedi. And who knows, maybe he'll see her again, once Anakin becomes a Jedi himself.

Anakin smiles.

Epilogue:

Anakin scowls.

We're seeing Yoda's scene with Anakin in Episode III through Yoda's POV. As he did years ago, Anakin still has problems with attachment... but in this case, he doesn't even tell Yoda anything. So Yoda can only give a general answer.

As Anakin refuses to elaborate on his premonitions and leaves, Yoda feels powerless, and can only hope he was able to help this troubled young man who, day after day, reminds him less of Qui-Gon and more of Dooku. Dooku who died yesterday.

Issue #2: Kit Fisto

Lesson: "don't try to be some 'Chosen One', just be yourself"

Anakin undergoes a trial that involves swimming. And he grew up on a desert planet. So of course, he fails. At night, he steals Obi-Wan's breather and sneaks out of their quarters to go to the pool and train.

He puts the breather on wrong and is about to drown but fear not! Jedi Knight Kit Fisto and his dashing smile are here to help!

He shows Anakin how to put his breather on right and shows him how to swim and fight underwater.

Now, this isn't just a pool. It's a pool in the Jedi Temple! So it's filled with a whole lot of marvelous fluorescent flora and fauna, I'm taking Avatar-style stuff.

So the swimming lesson becomes a lesson about the Living Force (who said it should just be Qui-Gon's thing? Lucas certainly didn't), using water as a metaphor.

The overall idea of the issue is that Anakin is concerned... he left his Mom behind, hoping to make her proud, make Qui-Gon proud, make Obi-Wan proud and live up to this expectation of being the Chosen One... but he's struggling at basic stuff like swimming! How's he gonna be this big time Jedi, one day?

Kit reassures Anakin: he shouldn't aspire to be a "Chosen One". All any Jedi should aspire to be is the best version of themselves.

Next day: Anakin passes the trial, Obi-Wan congratulates him, and Anakin completely misinterprets what Kit was telling him in a hilarious way by saying something silly and cocky like: "I just had to remind the water that I'm the best me there is so it better let me float or else."

Which gets an eye roll from Obi and a giggle from Kit.

(BTW, maybe we can have Nadar Vebb help Anakin swim too! Maybe even set him up as passing that trial the first time round with flying colors to contrast with Anakin, maybe he's an antagonist that comes around by the end, I dunno)

Epilogue:

As Mace battles Sidious in the other room, Kit Fisto, still breathing, rises to his feet and takes a few steps, intent on helping his friend despite his wound, but collapses... he's not gonna make it.

He turns around, stares at the ceiling. Is this how it ends?

Anakin appears in his line of sight, looking around at the dead Jedi, shocked. Kit smiles (ROTS novelization reference) as Anakin rushes into the adjacent corridor.

His last thought is the knowledge that everything's going to turn out alright, now that the Chosen One is here.

Issue #3: Mace Windu

Lesson: Control your feelings, don't let them control you.

Simple story. Obi-Wan was captured by a bunch of IG-11 assassins, allowing Anakin to escape and rescue a Senator's daughter. Now, Anakin and Mace are on a mission to get him back.

They make their way through a jungle filled with traps. Anakin is rushing, he's angry at the droids and afraid for Obi-Wan and it's making him do dumb stuff. After it happens a second time, Mace scolds him.

Around a campfire, Anakin apologizes for his impulsive behavior.

Mace comments that it's understandable. He only started being a Jedi, like, 5 years ago. Mastering your emotions isn't an easy thing to do, and in Anakin's case it's twice as hard. Anakin pries: is that why Mace didn't want him to become a Jedi?

Mace hesitates. Then says it, point blank: "yes".

And while he's sorry for being blunt, the fact remains that last week he threatened two of his fellow initiates with a lightsaber to the face.

Anakin points out that they were bullying him because they were jealous of his skill.

Against all expectation Mace smiles and reveals that he can relate to that. His own classmates would bully him for the same reason. You know who'd step in, in that situation? Qui-Gon. Qui-Gon was like a big brother to Mace, always had his back.

After sighing, with a calmer tone, Mace says he'll have a chat with those students. But Anakin needs to double his efforts to keep his feelings under control, lest he become enslaved by them.

The way he went about it was by developing Vaapad. He demonstrates it to Anakin, whose eyes are filled with stars.

Mace concludes that while he did have misgivings, he has faith that Anakin can find the way to do it.

In the morning, Anakin and Mace storm the castle filled with assassin droids. One of the droids sees they're losing and electrocutes Obi-Wan, hoping to unbalance them. Mace orders Anakin to stay focused, Kenobi can take it! And Anakin does!

Once the courtyard is cleared, Mace lifts the remaining droid torturing Obi-Wan with the Force and crushes it into a ball of metal.

As they walk away, Mace lets out a "good work, Skywalker."

Anakin asks Mace if he can teach him Vaapad-- Mace cuts him off with a "Nope".

"C'mooon!"

"Don't push it, Skywalker."

Epilogue:

In the Chancellor's office, Mace reflects the lightning back onto Palpatine's face.

The Sith seems out of commission.

And Mace is scared shitless. He almost died, a few seconds ago. His instinct is to run. He uses shatterpoint, tries to sense the future because Force knows he's got no idea what the hell he should do next. And that's when he sees it:

The various ways Sidious can kill him and Anakin.

Stop Mace's blade mid-air and Force Push them out of a window,

snap their necks with the Force,

crush the crystal in his lightsaber and let it blow up in his face.

Palpatine is faking and there are barely any scenarios in which Mace and Anakin are walking out of this room alive. And even if they do capture him, then

Sidious can bribe judges and Senate officials and supposing that doesn't work either, he can

escape any prison, kill thousands of clones in one night and

set up a new power base, starting from scratch.

This either ends now or the galaxy is doomed.

For a full second, the gravity of it all terrorizes Mace... then he chases his fear and musters his courage.

Anakin argues but Mace knows what he must do. He prepares to end the conflict once and for all, like a true Jedi would.

Anakin argues again, and Mace detects something else. Wait, why is Skywalker scared?

As he falls, Mace realizes the very thing that he feared would happen, a long time ago, has finally come true:

Anakin let his emotions rule him... and it doomed them all.

Issue #4: Shaak Ti

I was thinking for this one, we can have Obi-Wan bring her in as a sparring partner so she can demonstrate Jar'Kai to Anakin.

I haven't thought of a deeper lesson for this one, I just like Shaak Ti, folks, she's awesome :D

If anyone has suggestions, put 'em in the replies.

Epilogue:

(This one will definitely age poorly when The Mandalorian Season 3 comes out tomorrow!)

Order 66 rages as Shaak Ti protects a group of elderly Jedi in charge of the babies. She takes clone after clone down as she escorts them to an escape room the notices one baby left in the infirmary: Grogu.

Suddenly, she senses an overwhelming darkness approaching this wing of the temple. She thinks fast, she takes Grogu, crosses a corridor where 2-3 Jedi are killed (which is what Grogu remembers in the flashbacks)...

... and goes to a meditation room nearby. The shadow closes in and Shaak Ti realizes who it is: Skywalker.

We catch her moments later as she finished recording a message in her Holocron (the one from Star Wars #9)...

"It's up to you now. Don't let our deaths have been in vain. Don't let this be the end of the Jedi."

... then places it in Grogu's pod and hides him in an air vent. She sits on the chair, pretending to meditate.

The door slides open. Anakin enters the room, senses something in the air vent. Shaak Ti realizes he's about to find Grogu and distracts him: "what is it Skywalker?"

He stabs her. She falls.

He picks up her saber as he prepares to engage Cin Drallig and his apprentice with two lightsabers, just as she showed him.

A tear rolls down Shaak Ti's eye.

She looks at the air vent, sees Grogu's wet eyes peer through the grate. At least he's safe.

Issue #5: Obi-Wan

Lesson: Be less cocky, beware of Palpatine, ffs

Obi-Wan and Anakin are on a mission, maybe they're being chased by monsters, maybe it's in the middle of a firefight, maybe Anakin is trying to stop a train.

Bottom line: Anakin gets cocky and tries to do something incredibly stupid, thinking he can pull it off... and almost dies.

Obi-Wan manages to save him, but that hits him like a ton of bricks.

"I almost lost him."

Anakin's justification? Something along the lines of: he told the Chancellor he'd manage to do a triple flip next time he's on a mission, and that he'd try to catch it on a holovid.

So Obi-Wan loses his shit on Anakin, takes his saber and grounds him for a friggin' month.

Privately, he feels guilty. He almost lost Anakin and it would've been on him. His promise to Qui-Gon would be broken, Shmi's sacrifice, wherever she is, would be rendered pointless... and Anakin would be dead.

He talks to Mace and Yoda, who tell him not to blame himself. Obi-Wan takes this to heart and realizes who's to blame.

He goes to see the Chancellor.

And it's awkward af.

Put yourself in Obi-Wan's shoes. How do you tell your boss, the leader of the free world, to back off because he's a bad influence on your kid, in the most diplomatic way possible?

But he somehow manages. He puts his foot down and asks Palps if he wouldn't mind being a bit more hands-off.

Note: for one page, we're on Palpatine as he remembered every time he undermined everybody else's lessons. "Don't listen to Windu, your emotions are what make you human." "Still, a bit heartless of Yoda to not even send someone to free your mother. I'm sure they had their reasons." "Trust me, you're definitely a Chosen One, even if Jedi like Master Fisto don't see it."

Then Palpatine smiles. "Of course!" He even apologizes and agrees to step back for a bit, he understands that he may have inadvertently undermined Obi-Wan's authority. My bad, Master Kenobi. My bad.

Back in Anakin's quarters, Obi-Wan enters and sits next to Anakin on his bed. Silence.

What follows is a scene like this one in The Lion King:

Obi-Wan admits that Anakin really scared him today.

Anakin is sorry, but at the same time, he knew Obi-Wan would be there to save him in case he failed.

Obi-Wan explains that he won't always be able to be there to have Anakin's back. Anakin dismisses that, saying he trusts him.

"As long as we're together, it'll always turn out alright."

Epilogue:

As their dialog from the previous scene continues, Obi-Wan watches as his Padawan, his ward, his brother, his everything for the past 13 years, kneels in front of the Chancellor on a hologram recording.

So yeah, that was my attempt at writing Star Wars ^^' Thank you for making it this far!

Why only 5 issues? Well, it could be 6 issues. Could be 12, released monthly. I focused on 5 because I didn't wanna spend too much time photoshopping collages. Other scenarios could feature:

Saesee Tiin teaches Anakin flying maneuvers and finds he also has much to learn.

Quinlan Vos and Aayla Secura partner up with Obi-Wan and Anakin. Anakin initially finds a kindred spirit in Quin, even wonders if it would be possible for two knights to do a "Padawan swap", but eventually he sees that - as cool and laid back as Master Vos is - maybe he needs a Master who'll give him a bit more structure than the guy who'll let him stay up late.

Anakin and A'Sharad Hett going through a trial together. #Tatooineboys #arooo #kraytdragonsounds

Here's why I wrote these story ideas down:

There'll always be fans who see the Prequel Jedi as corrupt and arrogant, regardless of how much evidence from Canon or Lucas you provide to dispel the notion.

But sometimes, Star Wars transmedia content is used to fix inconsistencies or bolster ideas that were only alluded to in the films, or show a different point of view.

We got this recently with Shadows of the Sith, for example, which helped smooth some plot-holes from the Sequel Trilogy.

Sometimes, the material around the movies manages to re-contextualize and make the characters or the film itself more endearing, to fans. I mean, that's what The Clone Wars did for a lot of Prequel haters.

And I'm just disappointed this approach wasn't used to help the Prequel Jedi's perception among the fandom.

'Cause these are characters that have slowly been reframed as "the corrupt/complacent establishment" by authors who didn't find them likeable when they watched the films, when they were originally supposed to be "the underdogs who're doing their best".

An approach that was being taken during TCW was "let's question whether the Jedi are really all that good and moral and pure".

Nobody ever said they were, it's just that they tried to be their best selves, but whatever, let's play "devil's advocate", sure. Let's get some new points of view.

But skip to almost two decades later, and Star Wars has played "devil's advocate" with the Prequel Jedi so much that seeing them in a negative light is now mainstream.

So, now... how about we explore:

The trauma Mace Windu felt when he was actively seeing people he grew up with get shot to shreds by battle droids on the daily.

The ex-Jedi Knights who come back to the Order to help their former family, instead of focusing on the ones who left.

Rael or Sifo-Dyas calling Dooku out on his ideological bullshit and forcing him to face the fact that he's just a crook who talked himself into betraying his brethren.

The young Padawans whose masters went to Geonosis and never came back.

Plo Koon being attacked by a mob because he "looks evil" and both the Republic and the Separatist's war propaganda reflects badly on the Jedi, framed as “baby-snatching warmongers in their ivory tower”.

How about - instead of focusing on a series set 200 years prior, y'know, Back When The Jedi Were Great™ - we roll up our sleeves and question whether or not the Prequel Jedi were all that bad?

Just a thought.

[supernovafics]

𝐈𝐓'𝐒 𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐒 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐒𝐄

pairing: steve harrington x fem!reader

word count: 4.8k words

summary: in which the vecna events hurt you a lot more than you would allow yourself to admit to anyone. you lost your best friend, someone who was quite possibly your only true friend, and you just felt empty inside because of it. you somehow find solace in steve harrington and an unspoken bond forms between you two. you and him barely talk, though; talking is probably the last thing you do with one another. but, maybe, you should.

warnings: post season four, mentions of eddie, mentions of stancy, reader grieving eddie’s death, soft!steve, some fluff, SO MUCH angst, explicit language, smut (minors dni!), overall a lot of sadness but with a happy/hopeful ending

author’s note: this idea randomly came to me and i immediately stopped everything else i was working on to run with this lmao hope y’all enjoy!<333

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

It was because you almost died. 

That was what you kept telling yourself.

It was the life-and-death situations that you had found yourself in that past month that led you into Steve’s bed almost every night. And it was also the fact that he’d experienced those fucked up moments with you.

You and Steve weren’t friends. Even after what happened a little over a month ago, you rarely ever talked to each other during the normal hours that most people talked to one another. In fact, you found yourself actively avoiding him during the day. 

But, when night rolled around and you were feeling way too restless and insanely sad, you would call him and he would always answer because somehow he was always awake too. 

When you pulled into his driveway on this specific night, you didn’t hesitate to head to his front door and give it three quick knocks. He usually would leave the door unlocked for you after you told him you were on your way, but you still liked to knock. 

For some reason, the thought of letting yourself into his house made things feel a little too personal and intimate; even though you and him were doing perhaps the most intimate thing two people could do with one another. 

When Steve opened the door, he gave you a small smile. “Hi.” 

“Hi,” You responded softly before walking inside. 

You took notice of his attire which was typical, basketball shorts and a simple t-shirt, but his hair was much more disheveled than usual. It made you silently wonder if this time you actually had woken him up when you called. 

You peeled off your jacket and toed off your shoes, leaving them both by the front door. 

You followed him up to his room and quickly found comfort atop his bed as he closed and locked the door behind you both. Your legs dangled off the edge of the bed and you looked up at the ceiling. 

“Were you actually asleep when I called this time?”

“Maybe a little bit.” 

You propped yourself up by your elbows and looked at him. “You can tell me to fuck off sometimes, you know that right?” 

He ran a hand through his hair, which let you know that he was at least a little bit nervous and there was also a lot going through his head right then. You wish you didn’t know that about him, but it was hard not to notice little things like that with all of the nights you’d been spending together. 

“I could never tell you to fuck off,” He ultimately responded. 

Why? 

That was what you wanted to ask him, but you couldn’t let the word fall from your lips. Because you were scared about what emotional shit would be attached to his answer. You were scared that it just might finally break you open. 

Ever since everything went down you felt numb from it all and, for the most part, you were okay with that. You liked not feeling anything because it meant that you couldn’t truly grasp the pain and grief you were experiencing. 

By no means was it healthy, you knew that, but it still somehow made things a little better. 

However, there was still a part of you that longed for something, anything, that resembled the opposite of the emptiness you were feeling. 

And that was where Steve would come in. 

He’d give you something that would momentarily fill that void while simultaneously making you forget all of the shit going through your head. 

And you’d give him the same thing. Make him forget about the girl he was in love with who was perfectly happy with someone else. 

The two of you needed each other. You would never say it aloud, but it was the truth, and you couldn’t let a question of “why?” potentially ruin that right then. 

So, instead, you stood up and slipped off the sweatpants you were wearing and then pulled off the ratty old band t-shirt that had been Eddie’s. You hadn’t been wearing a bra under the shirt so you were standing in front of Steve in only your black underwear. His eyes slowly traveled up your body as he walked closer to you and a hand found your bare waist. 

When this all started weeks ago, it slightly surprised you how you never felt nervous or awkward under Steve’s gaze. Somehow you always felt comfortable, maybe even a little safe. 

You leaned into his soft touch and tilted your head up so that you could meet his lips. When your mouth met his, your mind effectively turned off and the next few moments felt like they were being lived by a different version of you. The version that was normal and not so painstakingly affected by grief and sadness. 

Steve guided you back onto the bed, his lips not detaching from yours once, so that your back was flush against the comforter. 

Soft words fell from his lips that you couldn’t decipher because you were so lost in your own pleasure. 

You felt him almost everywhere. Lips against your neck and trailing down your body, hands squeezing your breast and teasing you through your soaking underwear. 

“Please,” You found yourself muttering desperately as you bucked your hips upward a bit because you needed him so badly. 

Steve knew what you were essentially asking for and he wanted the same exact thing. So when he pulled away for a second to remove his t-shirt and basketball shorts and boxers, you slipped off your own underwear and let him make you simultaneously feel and forget everything. 

-

Three Weeks Earlier

“Hey.”

His presence startled you. So much so that you lost your balance a bit and almost fell into the lake. 

“Jesus Christ, Harrington, you can’t sneak up on a girl like that.”

“Sorry about that,” He said and pushed a quick hand through his hair. “I don’t think there was any right way to get your attention.”

You tilted your head at him. “What are you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same thing. Also, how did you get here? I didn’t see your car parked.” 

You turned away from him. “I walked.” 

“That doesn’t sound like the best idea.”

A small shrug was all you gave him in response as you kicked a small rock into the lake. 

You didn’t tell him that all of the walking you did made you so exhausted that the only thing you could think of when you finally stepped foot in your home was sleep and absolutely nothing else. 

You’d come to learn over the past few weeks that it was way too easy for your mind to spiral when you were alone in your bed if you didn’t force yourself to stay awake and do things until you were completely sleep deprived. 

“How’ve you been?” He asked as he walked over to stand next to you. 

You almost laughed at how ridiculous the question was because, in your mind, the answer seemed obvious. You’d been sad, angry, upset at the world, sometimes even upset at Eddie— and you’d always end up feeling like a horrible person when you did become upset at him.  

But you hadn’t seen Steve or anybody else involved since everything happened, so as ridiculous as the question was, it did make sense that he was asking it. 

“Not the best,” You ultimately answered. 

He waited a few moments to see if you would elaborate on what you meant, but you didn’t. 

“You’re kinda one of us now, so you can talk to us whenever. You can talk to me.”

You took a quick glance over at him and saw from the look on his face how much he meant his words. “That’s the thing though, I don’t wanna talk.”

“So, you just wanna wallow forever?” His tone wasn’t accusatory like you expected it to be. Instead, he was genuinely curious. 

“I just want to…” You let out a long sigh.  “Forget. Forget what happened, forget what we went through, forget that he’s gone. Everything.”

Steve didn’t say anything in response to that for a few moments, and you fought the urge to look at him because you knew that he was either staring at you like you were crazy or pitying you. You couldn’t decide which look would be worse.  

“Let me drive you home,” He said softly. You realized then that he probably felt sorry for you and his eyes were more than likely saying the same.  

You kept your gaze trained on the lake in front of you. “I’m okay.”

“Please?”

You only nodded because you knew you couldn’t say no. He’d probably ask a bunch of questions about what was going on with you, and you were a terrible liar so you knew you’d actually have to be honest with him. And how were you going to be honest with him, if you couldn’t be honest with yourself just yet? 

You allowed yourself to get comfortable in the passenger seat of Steve’s BMW, leaning back into the seat and staring out at the dark road ahead of you both. If the circumstances had been different you could’ve maybe found yourself falling asleep in his car. But, it was too quiet and things felt awkward, so you couldn’t help but say the first thing that crossed your mind. 

“How are you and Nancy?”

Steve didn’t say anything for a few long moments, but then he cleared his throat. “She’s, uh, she’s still with Jonathan.”

“Oh,” You said, and couldn’t hide the surprise in your voice. During everything, it seemed like the two of them were on some sort of course toward getting back together. “Sorry.” 

He shrugged halfheartedly. “It’s fine.”

Something about his demeanor told you that it actually wasn’t fine.  

Your eyes glanced at the time displayed on the dashboard. It was two in the morning but you weren’t tired enough. And you really didn’t wanna go back home just yet. 

“Um, can we go to yours actually?”

You fully expected him to question you and ask why you wanted to go to his place and not your own. But, he didn’t ask anything and instead gave you a small nod. “Okay.” 

His house was quiet and although you weren’t entirely sure how long you’d be staying, you slipped off the sneakers you were wearing and left them by the front door. 

“You want something to drink?” Steve asked. “I would also offer something to eat, but there’s nothing really here.” 

You shook your head. “Where’s your bathroom?”

“This way,” He said and then led you upstairs to the bathroom that was connected to his bedroom. 

When you flicked on the light and looked in the mirror, it was then that you noticed how bad you looked, and it actually made sense to you that Steve had wanted to take you home. Your face looked exhausted, but you didn’t feel tired at all.

The t-shirt you were wearing, which had been Eddie’s, was insanely wrinkled and you couldn’t remember the last time you’d taken it off, and the old dark sweatpants you were wearing had some random bleach spots on them. 

When you exited the bathroom, after splashing some water on your face to hopefully bring some life back to it, you noticed Steve lingering by his bedroom door. 

“You could’ve told me how insane I look right now,” You told him. 

“You look… fine,” He said hesitantly and you rolled your eyes as you sat on his bed. “I think you just look tired?”

You let out a small sigh and crossed your legs underneath you. “I’m quite literally the opposite.” 

He sat down next to you and things became quiet. 

“Why were you at the lake?” You decided to ask as you turned to look at him. 

“Couldn’t sleep, so I was just driving around,” He responded and you nodded at that as you looked down at your lap. 

You silently wondered if the aftermath of everything was hitting him as hard as it was hitting you. You almost asked him how he had been doing since it all happened, but the question couldn’t form on your lips. 

“I did mean what I said back there,” He abruptly said as he turned to you. After a few moments of quiet contemplation, you met his gaze. “You can talk to me. I know we didn’t know each other before everything happened, and we still don’t know each other that well. But, still… I’m here. If you ever wanna not forget about everything, we can talk about it.”

You appreciated his words, you truly did. But, the thought of actually talking about everything made you feel physically ill.

Steve placed his hand atop yours and gave it a light reassuring squeeze. The action was so minor and could’ve easily been deemed as meaningless, but it did mean so much to you. For some reason that you couldn’t decipher or understand, he really did care about you. 

You shifted a bit closer to him and allowed your body to move faster than your thoughts could tell you that what you were doing was a bad idea. You moved into his lap, knees straddling either side of his waist. 

“Is this okay?” You asked, eyes meeting his.

He nodded slowly and you could see the minor confusion on his face but you chose to ignore it because if you didn’t you knew that you would start thinking too hard about what you were doing. 

So, instead, you kept your mind off and let your body run on autopilot. Your hands settled at the nape of his neck and you leaned down to kiss him. His hands were firmly planted at his sides, too scared that all of this somehow wasn’t real to touch you back, but he did kiss you with just as much passion as you were giving him. 

It finally felt good to actually feel something; something that didn’t cause you sadness. 

“Touch me, Steve. Please,” You said in-between heated kisses. 

He didn’t have to be told twice and his hands were on you in an instant, sneaking under your t-shirt and rubbing the soft skin of your hip, then waist, then back, then all the way up to your bra-covered breast. You moaned at the feeling of him squeezing you through the thin fabric. 

You pulled back for a second to pull off your shirt and toss it somewhere in the room, and Steve took the opportunity to flip the two of you so you were pressed against the bed and he was on top of you. Your hands found a home in his hair as the two of you resumed kissing with even more intensity that time around. When Steve’s lips found your neck, you involuntarily bucked your hips upward and rubbed yourself against his hardness, which elicited a soft groan from him. 

Abruptly, he pulled away. “Wait– Shit– Sorry.”

He rolled off of you and you turned on your side to look at him with confused eyes; he was staring up at the ceiling. “Why are you sorry?”

“You’re sad right now,” Steve said, still avoiding your eyes. “We shouldn’t be doing this.” 

He was right about the first part, but that didn’t mean that what the two of you were doing was a bad idea. In fact, you thought it was the opposite. 

You were lonely, and you were pretty sure he was too. Why couldn’t the two of you help each other feel not alone? 

“It’s okay. Seriously. I want this,” You told him as you shifted closer toward him and ran a hand through his hair. 

He was looking at you now, searching your eyes for full confirmation that this really was okay. And he didn’t see any uncertainty in your gaze, but he still was hesitant. 

“Please,” The word was soft and quiet, but Steve heard you loud and clear, and something inside of him shifted. 

Finally, he was kissing you again and not wasting a second to move you back on your back so that he was on top of you as he peppered kisses down your body. 

And finally, he was pulling off his shirt and pants and boxers and grabbing a condom, and you were taking off the remainder of your clothes as well. 

And finally, he was slowly pushing himself inside of you and groaning at the feeling of you around him, your wet walls taking him in so well and squeezing around his cock so tightly. 

You moaned and winced at the feeling as you adjusted to having him inside of you. You had had sex before but Steve was huge, and it felt like it was your first time all over again. 

“You okay?” He asked, hand finding your cheek to softly stroke it. 

You gave him a small nod and let your eyes slip shut as you shifted your hips a little. “Mhm. You can move now.”

He pressed a quick kiss to your lips as a way to say “okay” and then slowly began moving, pulling out just a little bit and then pushing right back into you. 

You moaned uncontrollably as your chest swelled and your body was overcome with an insane amount of emotions; and all of them were surprisingly good emotions, which you hadn’t been used to anymore. You had felt so empty for so long that you didn’t expect to ever feel anything again. 

But, now here you were with Steve. 

You opened your eyes and immediately met his dark gaze. You didn’t shy away from his stare. Instead, you liked looking at him and seeing how equally enamored he was with you in that moment because of what the two of you were doing. 

His hair was falling into his eyes with every thrust, so you reached up to run your hands through it, and you loved the loud groan he elicited when you gave his dark locks a soft pull. He began pounding into you with much more vigor. 

“Fuck, Steve. Yes.”

“You’re so good, doing so well for me,” He said as his hand snaked down between your bodies to begin rubbing tight circles against your clit. 

You cried out his name loudly and arched your back at the feeling of his fingers against the sensitive bundle of nerves. “Shit, shit, shit.”

“You’re so close, aren’t you? I can feel you squeezing around me so tight, fuck,” Steve groaned, movements getting harsher and sloppier with each thrust. “You wanna come?”

You nodded immediately and frantically. “M’so close, yes. Please, please make me come.”

His fingers rubbed your clit harder and faster, which was enough to make you see stars and send you over the edge. His lips messily found yours, swallowing your moans as he continued fucking you through your orgasm and found his own release only moments later. 

Your breaths were still coming out in soft pants and you could feel Steve softening inside of you. “Fuck, that was really great.”

“Yeah,” He agreed with a nod and smile as he slipped out of you and moved to his side, still looking at you. You turned your head to meet his eyes. 

Things became comfortably quiet as the two of you simply stared at each other and you could finally feel your eyelids actually getting heavy. But, you didn’t want to fall asleep there. 

“Can you take me home?” You asked, breaking eye contact and sitting up in the bed. 

“Yeah, no problem.”

Minutes later, you were back in the clothes you’d shown up in and then you were back in Steve’s passenger seat. 

And right when your head hit your own pillow, you were asleep and didn’t wake up for a solid eight hours. Which was much different from the usual six, sometimes even five, hours you had become used to getting.

You didn’t think that you’d have sex with Steve again. 

Yes, it was absolutely mind-blowing and you’d love for it to happen again because of how good it made you feel; probably the most “good” you’d felt in a while. But, in your head, it was a fluke. You didn’t regret it, but you just didn’t think the circumstances would align for it to happen again. 

However, when the next night rolled around, you found yourself creating your own circumstances and calling him, and he didn’t hesitate to tell you to come over. 

-

Now 

“You miss him?”

You almost made some joking comment about how Steve was still inside of you and he somehow decided that right then was the time to shift the conversation to your best friend, but you refrained from doing so.

Steve was always so much softer than you were after sex, and he had always wanted to make sure you knew that he was there for you if you wanted more than just sex.

You had wanted to show him that you would do the same for him too; let him talk about Nancy and everything he was feeling from that situation. But, it was too hard.

Because more than anything, you wanted this to be as mindless as possible.

After a few weeks, he decided to stop trying to start a conversation with you after because of how little you reciprocated. However, apparently, this time was different though.

And it was also different for you too because you actually found yourself wanting to talk back.

“All the time,” You finally answered as you shifted off of him and let your head find his pillow as you grabbed the thin sheet to pull it over you a bit. “Pretty much all hours of the day.”

You didn’t say that the only time you didn’t miss Eddie, that the only time things actually felt the tiniest bit bearable, was when you were here with Steve. Because you hadn’t realized that until right then, and the thought slightly startled you.

You turned on your side and faced him. “You miss her?”

He turned too and his hand found your hip underneath the sheet and mindlessly started tracing small circles on the bare skin. “Who?”

You gave him a look because you knew that he knew exactly who you were referring to.

His eyes shut for a second and you could tell that he was thinking about what to say. “Sometimes, I guess.”

You glanced down at the scar he had on his abdomen from where he was attacked by the demo-bats and slowly let your fingers trace against it. “You could always just tell her, y’know? Tell her that you love her.”

“Did you ever tell him?” His voice was quiet.

Your eyes flickered back up to his. “Tell him what?”

“That you love him.”

His words slightly confused you but you nodded your head. “Of course, probably every day. But, that’s different.”

“How?” Steve asked, genuinely curious, and you thought it was slightly funny because in your head the answer to his one-worded question was obvious.

“I didn’t love him how you love her.”

“What?” The confusion was evident in his tone.

Your eyebrows furrowed. “What?”

He shifted and sat up in the bed, the sheet sinking down and barely covering his hips. You almost followed suit and sat up too, but you were too tired to do so, so you just looked up at him and started becoming confused because of how confused he seemed.

“You and Eddie… You two– You guys were together, right?” He asked, eyes finding yours.

“Ew, no,” You said and laughed a bit. “Eddie is like–” You sighed at your mistake. “Was like… a brother to me.”

“But…” Steve trailed off, unsure of what he wanted to say because there was a lot circling his mind right then.

“What made you think that we were dating?”

“You guys were so close. It just– It made a lot of sense,” He answered, and you understood what he meant. You and Eddie were insanely close, but not in that way. Never in that way. Simply the thought of him being anything more than your closest friend felt slightly incestual to you. “And when I saw you that night, after everything, you were crying at lover’s lake.”

“I was not crying,” You said with a small scoff. Although you did remember that you had been close to it that night. “And I hadn’t necessarily gone there on purpose, I was just walking around to make myself tired so that I could sleep, and I ended up there.”

“Wow,” He said, letting out a small breath as he leaned back against the pillow and stared up at the ceiling.

You almost laughed at how surprised he was at your words. “I can’t believe how big of a revelation this is for you.”

He turned toward you again. “It’s just– Wow.”

“Okay, now that that is cleared up, I guess, back to you and your situation. You should just tell–”

Before you could finish your statement, Steve abruptly pressed his lips against yours.

The two of you never kissed outside of sex, only during it and as a prelude to it. Never after, though.

So, that surprised you. Even though you kissed him back almost immediately because of how many times you’d kissed him before, you were still in shock because this was probably the most chaste and sweetest kiss he had ever given you. But, it still felt so familiar.

When he pulled away, you should’ve asked something along the lines of “what was that for?” or “why did you do that?”. But, instead, your mind trailed back to something Steve had said earlier.

“I could never tell you to fuck off.”

And that statement made you ask a question that might have sounded so random, but it felt like it was connected to what he had just done.

“Earlier, why did you say that you could never tell me to fuck off?”

Steve’s hand softly stroked your cheek and he was completely unfazed by your question. “Because I like you too much.”

“But, Nancy–”

He shook his head before you could finish. “She’s with Jonathan and she’s happy. They’re meant to be. I’ve accepted that.”

“But…” It was your turn to trail off because you didn’t know what to say. All you could do was simply stare at him and take notice of how tenderly he was looking at you in that moment.

“This whole time I felt like a horrible person because I was falling for you while I thought you were grieving your boyfriend. I can’t believe how wrong I was,” He said with a small sigh.

Your mind was effectively blank and there was nothing you could even think of saying to Steve right then. There was way too much to process in such a short amount of time.

You felt like you were in the same “misunderstanding boat” as him. Because in your mind he had still been in love with Nancy. Therefore, why would you allow yourself to like him? You would’ve just ended up getting hurt and losing him, and he was the only thing in your life that made you feel somewhat better about Eddie.

You were then reminded of your earlier realization, and how good it felt being with Steve on sleepless nights like these.

“I thought you loved Nancy,” You finally said.

“And I thought you and Eddie had been together.”

You couldn’t help but laugh a bit. “We should talk more. Our communication is pretty shitty.”

His arm circled your waist as he laughed too and pulled you close to him. You let your head settle on his chest and your eyes slip shut.

It was quiet for a few moments before you decided to finally let yourself be completely honest with him. “I think I like you too much too. Like, too much. It’s so much harder to go to sleep when I’m not here with you. And you make things feel a lot better. Everything that happened… It doesn’t hurt as much when I’m with you. Somehow it all actually feels okay.”

Your voice was soft and it could’ve been easy for Steve not to hear you, but he did. Instead of immediately responding, he simply held you tighter and pressed a kiss to the top of your head. You could’ve sworn if your eyes weren’t closed you’d be crying from the action.

“Don’t leave tonight, okay?”

His request didn’t fully surprise you, but at the same time, it did. Mainly because it was something that neither of you ever really talked about or acknowledged.

Sometimes, actually a lot of the times, you would end up falling asleep in Steve’s bed with his arms around you, but you’d always be gone before the morning came because you knew that everything would feel too “real” if your moments with Steve lived beyond the nighttime. And he never called you out on abruptly leaving or ever tried to convince you to stay.  

Of course, now, you didn’t care about what it would mean if you stayed with him as the night slowly faded away. And in fact, you found yourself aching for mornings with him and days spent together doing nothing or driving aimlessly around town in addition to the amazing nights you’d have together.

You smiled softly into the darkness as you nuzzled yourself impossibly closer to him and finally responded. “Okay.”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

let me know ur thoughts<333

[thesharktanksdriver]

Being a Magical Girl in Gotham (Platonic)

Part 1 Part 3 part 4

A continuation from the last part. I think I’m gonna later add stuff about y/n meeting other hero’s and villains plus some oneshots instead of just headcanon stories

Once again sorry/not sorry if characters are out of character . Also this is continuing y/n’a journey of continually getting more villains and hero’s to adopt them lol.

Y/n is literally becoming these Criminally insane villains’s emotional support child lol. And y’all can’t stop me from making that happen

Months within your friendship with Damien your a regular visit to the Wayne manor

And Damien is more than pleased with this since he now gets to brag to his older half-brothers

You can only giggle as the youngest Wayne drags you away before any of the others are able to talk to you

Damien at the manor enjoys spending time out in the garden with you

Having small picnics as Titus lounges beside the two of your in the grass near the expertly planted gardenias in full bloom

Turns out he likes helping Alfred with the garden quite a bit

Turns out he likes helping Alfred with the garden quite a bit

Turns out he likes helping Alfred with the garden quite a bit

Turns out he likes helping Alfred with the garden quite a bit

Turns out he likes helping Alfred with the garden quite a bit

Turns out he likes helping Alfred with the garden quite a bit

They even planted a small raspberry bush that only the two (now three) of them knew about

It’s rare to feel as if sunlight was a thing in Gotham but out here it’s almost rare that there wasn’t a beam of golden light hitting your face

If you make a flower crown for Damien he’ll wear it with a bit of bitching but the minute his brothers make a comment about it he’s pulling out his sword

Speaking of which, he shows you his sword collection!

An honour only you get to see without the threat of being stabbed as an extra bonus

He has a wide array of them, all from different areas of the world and different time periods

It’s actually really impressive

(Definitely asks if you want one and plans to get you one as a gift)

His room is bigger than your apartment and half the shit there would cover 4 months of rent

You don’t mention this though

He has a lot of imported furniture from what looks to be the Middle East and Asian descent

If you ask about it he’ll actually be really happy to explain their origin and history

He’s very passionate about history and seems to have a ton of knowledge on all arrays of most countries

Definitely gets worried when you mention have cup noodles for dinner 4 times in a row and demands you stay for dinner

You do and it ends up being really fun

At school after that he makes sure Alfred packs an extra lunch for you to have

Mr Wayne himself is actually really nice and much different from the Himbo he’s often portrayed as by the press

He’s extremely friendly to you, always offering a smile and small hello when Damien drags you off to wherever

He doesn’t seem to mind you being in his home infact he seems to encourage it

When Damien had chased his brother Dick around for trying to spy on you and him Bruce sat down and talked with you

He actually thanked you for making his son happy

Also asks if maybe he could speak to your parents sometime

You just say that their usually really busy abroad but you’d that get a letter from them since you don’t have a phone

You can tell by that alone he’s worried, like real worried at the thought of you basically living alone in a city like Gotham

A week later you forge a note from penguin lol. That man has good handwriting but definitely lost a few years on his life when you said it was for faking a note from your nonexistent parents

Bruce might be considering to adopt you and his sons are fully encouraging this

At some point in going to the manor you began sometimes helping Alfred with some small chores by delivering Bruce’s tea

He finds it to be a pleasant surprise and give him more opportunities to speak to you

Bruce finds you to be a impressive young lady. One who’s wise beyond their years and someone who has a unknown but similar weight on their shoulders

It worries him since he sees himself in your eyes

He begins connecting some dots about the rumours he’s heard about some young girl vigilante?, he’s not sure what exactly to label them as

But isn’t 100% sure it’s you since they apparently look 17 and your clearly 15

He puts a pin in it though

Anyways you can bet that he’s now inviting you to his gala’s so Damien more at ease plus give you a nice night to relax

He pays for clothes and even gifts them to you afterwards

The minute he finds out your an orphan you best bet he’s pulling out the papers-

Dick is super excited to meet you! Minus the fact that Damien is basically hissing at him and dragging you away

When he does get to speak to you he kinda reminds you of Nightwing with how pleasantly chatty he is

He asks about how your school is, if your enjoying your stay and what you think of lil Dami etc

Probably suggests to Damien about having you over for a sleepover and that he’ll take over his patrol for that night

Damien his heavily considering it

Probably calls you stuff like “kiddo!” And some alternation of your name

Has Alfred bring you and Damien snacks when y’all are hanging out

Listen he’s just really invested in the fact that Damien has a seemingly normal friend whom he cares for

It means he’s learning and adjusting to a relatively normal life outside of being Robin which was something he always worried about

Like Bruce he kinda gets worried about how your parents are apparently abroad and left you, a 15 year old child alone in Gotham of all places

Gets even more worried when you refuse to get a ride home

Sometimes spies but always gets caught and chased off by Damien who’s slightly annoyed

He means well

When you join for dinner he likes to tell a lot of stories and listen to your own

Basically already considers you a part of the family and is waiting for Bruce to slap out those papers

Might try to pry about who’s your favourite superhero just to see everyone at the table silently hope

His hope is crushed when you say it’s Wonder Woman

Then Everyone’s hood is crushed when you say your favourite male superhero is supermen

Clark probably hears their crushed souls from metropolis lol

Tim is just plain confused and wonders if your being paid or need help

He might love Damien as his little brother but he also has the scars to prove that little shit ain’t always a law abiding citizen

When he does realize though that Damien didn’t threaten you nor is paying you (why did he even jump to that conclusion?) he finds himself curious

Bruce forbids him from looking through your entire internet history and trying to find every possible trace of your existence

You notice early on how he’s addicted to coffee (just like Nightwing mentioned about red Robin)

Like with Bruce you help Alfred and deliver him some from time to time

This along with the limo rides with him and Damien give you the chance to actually talk to him

He’s really passionate about his goals, talking about his passions and plans in life

He seems to be hard working like you are, but to a worrying degree where he pushes himself to the limit (like you do)

It’s somewhat worrying to you as you find him lunched over his laptop with 6 empty mugs of coffee and bags under his eyes

You can’t say much since that would be hypocritical

But that doesn’t mean you can’t distract him for a bit as to give home a break he desperately needs!

You use Rigel to get his eyes away from his computer screen. The small white ferret making him pause as he scoops them up

Also riddles galore, some of which you might’ve borrowed from Riddler (he’d be so proud)

He’s pretty determined in getting to know you after a while, figuring out what you like and don’t, or what type of food you preferred

It might kinda seem a bit creepy at first but you realize that this is his way of trying to show his care. Odd but kinda amusing once you realize he told Alfred and now you have an entire menu catered to your taste

At some point he might’ve peaked at your records and is confused when he can’t find anything

He hasn’t told Bruce but he’s getting more worried when he digs deeper to see you seemingly live alone in a shit part of Gotham

Realllly wants to tell Bruce but also doesn’t cause that’ll mean he disobeyed him and might get another “friendly” visit from Damien’s batarangs

Whoops…oh the pain of being too smart

Jason shows up one day while your hanging out with Damien out of fucking nowhere

Like your just laying in the grass, petting Titus and then bam there’s a shadow looming over you

He seems kinda pleasantly surprised that “demonspawn” has a friend

Teases the shit out of Damien in front of you in a very big brother kinda way

Whenever he stops by he brings McDonald’s like a cool bring bother or uncle

Damien complains it’s bad for your health but stops when you mention that McDonald’s is something you can barely afford so you appreciate the free food

He may be a little shit but he’s not gonna be an asshole about that…at least not anymore compared to when he first arrived

He occasionally picks you and Damien up from school or drops by at lunch to deliver some special food from Alfred

One day when Damien was sick and it was raining hard when you didn’t have a proper jacket her gave you his leather one

He let you keep it, saying that he had plenty of other one’s and that you suit it better

Mentions literature a lot, even seems to have a small version of pride and prejudice tucked in his pocket

Jason likes to joke that his white streak in his hair is from learning about Damien having a BFF now

Damien in return calls him geezer and encourages you to do the same

He’s the person who immediately notices when you have any bruises other than Damien

Reallly tries to convince you to let them drive you home when you once mentioned the area you live in

He’s gonna get more white hair if you mention the fact that your apartment doesn’t have a proper lock on it and you have to prop a chair against the door

If Damien doesn’t gift you that sword soon he’s gonna give you a pocket knife

He fucking adores Rigel, loves it when the interdimensional god ferret lays in his hair

Takes photos and jokes that their now his white streak

You caught him using a baby voice with Rigel and his brothers won’t let him live (hah) it down

Alfred is half convinced that your some type of universal sign by some god lol

Best grandpa

He secretly bakes you and Damien cookies just for you two and even leaves some that have chocolate chip smiley faces

As stated before by Damien’s request he begins making you a lunch as well for Damien to deliver since he wants you to have a good meal

God knows how much he has wanted another calm person in this household

Sometimes in your lunches you find little bundles of fresh lavender and notes saying “have a splendid day” and “do your best”

He really appreciates you helping him out even though he didn’t ask. He mostly lets it happen so you have the chance to spend time with other members of the family

He makes little treats for Rigel

Due to Tim he has your taste narrowed down and always makes sure to have your favourites when you visit

May or may not have thought of room decor if Bruce adopted you

He senses your an orphan. He just knows but wants the others to figure it out rather than saying it

If you’ll indulge him he loves talking about old films and classic literature like Dracula

He was actually the one who introduced Jason to it and would love to turn their two person book club into 3

Finds Rigel very cute and lets the small animal curl around his neck

He finds it really nice if you want to join him in cooking and would most definitely teach you new recipes

Except his cookie recipe cause that one is a pennyworth family secret

You once tried to lie about not being sick and he gave you a knowing look before giving you a care package of his chicken noodle soup and some medicine

Your half convinced he’s not human but not in a bad way, more of a “is he a god?” Or “is he like Rigel” sorta way

You get legal advice from Harvey about the entire ordeal. The past DA offering to do more than just legal advice if you’d like

You say that you want to handle this on your own so he and two-face relent

But not before saying that the offer stills stands

Both Harvey and Two-face enjoy your presence for various different reasons but the important one is that you treat them as their own separate people

With Harvey you talk to him about what it was like going to collage and being the DA

He often talks about his friendship with Bruce and their crazy times when they were younger

He often wonders how he’s doing

You want to tell him but know that doing so could reveal who you possibly are

Probably tells you if the time Bruce “accidentally” poured wine on an asshole professor in a white suit after harassing a few female students

Probably tells you legal loopholes that your not supposed to know but you appreciate it anyways

Two-face on the other hand is kinda more difficult to talk to but once you get past his walls he talks and talks

Most definitely tells you how to pick locks and evade taxes, I’m sorry but that’s what he’s gonna teach you

At some point he probably offers to “talk” to your landlord about why he illegally raised your rent

Tells you about how corrupt the world actually is

Teaches you to flip a coin

He and Harvey get a lot of bouts of pain due to the burns so there are times they’ll go quiet out of trying to deal with it

With maybe a little magic from Rigel you make a special burn cream that helps alleviate that pain

Listen…you get he’s a bad person and all but you don’t like seeing people in pain

It’s been that way ever since you were young and having to watch kids your age suffer

Maybe it was always in your nature to help others no matter how much it weighed on you

It’s probably the reason why Rigel had chosen you in the first place

Yeah, that makes sense

Mr freeze is kinda a sad grandpa that you find yourself visiting to check up on

You had fought his shadowmite when the anger from his wife’s condition rose up again

After that your welcomed to his small lab for as long as you can due to the cold

He often laments about Nora. How she would’ve loved to meet you

You always say that she will one day which gets a small melancholic smile

You can only spend up to maybe 30-45 minutes with him before your begin to freeze despite you changing your magical uniform to better suit the temperature

If you request it he’ll show you how to ice skate and finds it really amusing if you succeed and then slip into a pile of snow

Speaking of snow, you like to leave little snow men hidden around for him to find

He sometimes talks to Nora’s body about you when alone. He mentions how he’s been feeling a bit better as of late due to you popping by

You don’t know this but he and Nora always wanted a child. So having you around kinda helps fill a hole in his heart that he long thought was frozen over with grief

I like to think that in his spare time he’s taken up knitting and made you a pair of matching mittens, scarf and hat

Their a teal blue with little snowflakes designs on them with maybe a little hidden snowman

He sometimes sneaks in ice or snow puns to watch you process it for a minute and then laugh

It makes his day

Probably tells you that if you need a good murder weapon he can make you a good icicle that’ll melt away therefore removing evidence

It’s hard to think he’s a super villain until he brings up shit like that

If you literally give him anything as a gift he’ll end up cherishing it

You actually end up meeting Waylon by accident in the sewers since you use them as a kinda secret passageway across Gotham

Your surprised at meeting the literal giant man who looks like a crocodile but you don’t end up panicking much

Same shit different day in Gotham

He lets you pass and even guide you to where you needed to go

After that it kinda becomes a system of meeting him and talking as he guides you through the Sewers (even if you knew them by heart at this point)

You like giving him leftovers that you have even if you also need them

The two of you now have a small tradition of sitting and enjoying a cup of ramen once in awhile

He teaches you a few French phrases and tells you of New Orleans

Talking of the mixed French and American culture of the city

At some point he probably tells you to visit for him if you get the chance. You promise to do so and being back a souvenir for him

Of all villains you feel the most sympathy for him. Someone who was born with something that they couldn’t control and being ostracized by society for it

Eventually becoming what they feared in the first place to survive

At some point you trust him enough to tell him about how you live alone. Barely getting enough to scrape by and living in a shitty apartment after running away from an orphanage

He lets you sit on his shoulder despite the fact you can basically fly a few feet off the ground

Also likes to mess up your hair with his giant clawed hands

He always makes sure to be slow just in case cause he doesn’t want to accidentally hurt you. You tell him he doesn’t and that you felt with worse but that in turn makes him even more gentle in being near you

During the winter you buy him a heater incase his condition also leads him to being cold blooded (which he is)

He definitely appreciates it since winters are really rough for him

Definitely finds the contrast of cute, small innocent magical girl and then giant, hulking, scaled lizard man being friends to be hilarious

During this time you begin to notice the Shadowmites kinda begin to thin out

It makes you a bit more relaxed and off guard (big mistake)

What had initially started out as a small gathering of them soon evolved into them all attacking at once

Biting and clawing as you did your best to stop them

By the end of it your left barely conscious, their hosts left laying on the ground passed out from having their energy drained

You could only hope they’d be ok as you find yourself stumbling towards the only place you could think of

Library

You move purely out of instinct, your body moving on its own as your weakened abilities help you move from rooftop to rooftop

Today was luckily one of the days you’d meet up with Hood, at least meaning if you passed out there you’d be relatively safe since your apartment was too far away

When you get there you almost sob out of relief when seeing his red helmet that matched the colour leaking from your form

Dark blotches of red contrasting against the lighter colours of your uniform

[miupow]

okay have to ask about *your* dad!txt thoughts since you've been in my askbox hehe

-ari

omg my dad!txt thoughts... i have so many but i will try to keep this short (i didn't)

txt as dads~

dad!soobin

╰⪼ has four or five kids, and none of them were planned TT they're all close together in age too, one after another.. soobin just can't keep his hands to himself when it comes to his wifey ><

╰⪼ certified girl dad omg but he'd have both... twin girls then a boy, then another girl, and then another boy hehe and they're all so sweet and shy like him :(

╰⪼ his kids walk all over him!! he just can't say no to them when they whine and pout :( gets them whatever they want and will do whatever they ask him to. tea parties and makeovers? nerf gun battles and dramatic storybook readings? doesn't matter he'll do it cos he loves spending time with his kids :>

╰⪼ he's just such a family man TT he loves his little ever-growing family sm and makes it known every day :(

dad!yeonjun

╰⪼ two kids cos he's a single child and wants his kids to have siblings :3 two girls, both spoiled absolutely rotten! they eat his credit card for lunch omg but he doesn't care, anything to make his baby girls happy ^^ they're such brats tho i know it TT have their daddy wrapped around their little fingers

╰⪼ even more of a girl dad than soobin oml... his daughters are his princesses and he'd move mountains for them if he had to!! literally melts anytime his daughters ask for something, he has to get it cos then they'll cry, and he can't stand to see his babies cry...

╰⪼ such a protective dad :( always holding them close, freaks out any time they fall or get hurt, even if it's just a little scrape. swoops them up in his arms n coddles them >< omg if kids were being mean to them at school or something.. full rampage on the poor teachers

╰⪼ always covered in glitter or has bows in his hair, carries their baby photos in his wallet, always running home as fast as he can every day so he can spend time with his favorite girls ;(

dad!beomgyu

╰⪼ he's such a boy dad nothing can convince me otherwise.. honestly that workman episode just solidified it for me. i think he'd have just one son, his mini me :( literally identical in every way, they even dress similar TT

╰⪼ his son is a little hellion tbh but it's okay cos he's cute.. just so energetic 24/7 and never seems to run out of energy TT somehow beomgyu manages to keep up with him.. i know the house is a mess

╰⪼ gyu has such a deep connection with his dad and i feel like it would be the same for him and his son :( they do absolutely everything together, with his son riding on his shoulders

╰⪼ i think beomgyu would be the least prepared to be a dad but i think he'd be such a good one :( before his son was born i think he would have a lot of anxiety about it :(

dad!taehyun

╰⪼ girl dad taehyun hits different im ngl, but i think he would have both a girl n a boy, two kids like yeonjun. they're both so polite and softspoken like their daddy :( n they both have his big brown boba eyes... crying

╰⪼ his kids would definitely be the most well behaved and respectful TT he would make sure that they behaved themselves and had good manners! they'd have good grades and play soccer and just be so intelligent.. he'd just have the best kids

╰⪼ science experiments and ant farms and bottle rockets :( his kids are so curious and he loves to watch them learn and grow <3 he always helps them too, his favorite way of spending time with them. they climb all over him like he's a jungle gym but he doesn't mind cos he's strong enough to hold them both even when they're older :>

╰⪼ like yeonjun he'd be so protective over his son and daughter, always wary about them getting hurt. he's that helicopter dad at the playground who wont take his eyes off of his kids lol. if anything ever happened to them he'd be absolutely beside himself

dad!hyuka

╰⪼ oh hyuka ;( two boys and a girl, opposite of him and his sisters. he'd be such a good girl dad because he grew up around girls but i think his sons would be such mini mes always following him around.. the huening gene is so strong they would look just like him :( he and his sons would be so protective over their daughter/baby sister too

╰⪼ just loves his kids so much :( he'd be such a good dad i can't even put it into words omg, would dedicate his life to them from the moment they were born. the fact that he was a dad would be the most important part of his identity from then on

╰⪼ i think he'd have kids later than the other boys so he'd be a lot more mature when they come into his life, a lot more prepared for the responsibility. omg that's all he would do is prepare when his wife told him she was pregnant, obsessed with learning as much as he can so he can be the best husband/father he can be

╰⪼ just dad hyuka. literally haunts me every waking moment

[asquared-ohgodnotthehorrors]

Ok, I’ve been seeing people make other character timeloop AUs, and as much as I enjoy seeing those, and as much as I like to think “that’s just you, let people have fun, there is no singular canon for this,” a tiny part of my brain always screams “but thEY’RE WRONG!!!”

So, I’m gonna appeal to that foolish part of my brain and also prove it wrong by breaking down how I feel these timeloop AUs should work. Heavy spoilers for In Stars and Time below.

Now, before we start discussing that, we need to first break down what effects does the Timeloop have on Siffrin specifically.

Siffrin, even before the timeloop, has… so many issues. Moreso than his other compatriots, at least from what we see. The thing is, Siffrin’s identity issues are all shared with the other party members. Siffrin is unsure what parts of themself they like and dislike or want to bury like Isabeau, Siffrin has a diasporic disconnect like Odile but worse, Siffrin has something that brings so much joy yet so much grief (the Timeloops, yes, but also their culture they can’t remember) just like Mirabelle, and Siffrin is so scared of being too weak or too late or too stupid to keep people from getting hurt just like Bonnie.

But there are also the abandonment issues, the crippling fear of being left behind, being forgotten and not being loved. That is the main crux of Siffrin’s issues in the game, it’s what spawns the timeloops, encourages Siffrin to keep everything secret, break the universe, etc. And the other characters don’t have that same crippling fear…

… at least, as far as we know. See, the special thing about In Stars and Time is that it dissects Siffrin right in front of us. We know about the other characters, they get plenty of time to talk, but we know so much about Siffrin that we would not have learned otherwise. The other characters have issues, but we never… deep dive into them the same way. They’re left up to interpretation.

So… let’s do some interpreting!

Mirabelle is the easiest. She has super awful imposter syndrome, and the thing is it doesn’t really come up much outside the main route and few snack times. But that imposter syndrome is super real. If she started looping, how would she react? Would that alleviate her imposter syndrome entirely? Unlikely, it’d make her think she was blessed by the Change god. But only at first. That same imposter syndrome might make her not tell the party members, but I don’t think it would actually stop her for very long.

Mirabelle is also much louder with her emotions than Siffrin. Her emotional highs and lows would be a lot briefer, yet more frequent. She wouldn’t be empty too easily.

There is also the fact that Mirabelle’s very belief is Change. It doesn’t matter the grief it brings her with her identity, she still loves and believes in it. That’s a good thing in some respects. In each loop she’ll try something different, make each loop as unique as possible. It’ll keep her sane for longer than Siffrin… and then, she’ll start going off track. Start doing anything, everything possible to make each loop unique. Even things she really, really doesn’t want to do.

She’d probably stop herself in some regards. Never hurt her friends, never kill anyone who they don’t intend to kill. But she’d definitely hurt herself. Hurt herself in every way possible.

When she gives up, it’s almost sort of a good thing. She’ll stop trying to make any change, let anything change. But the issue with that? She’d just be giving up the same way Loop did. What would that do to her?

Now, let’s move onto Odile. In terms of emotional awareness, Odile and Siffrin are very similar. Unlike Mirabelle, apathy likely suites Odile just fine. In fact, that would probably become a defense mechanism to Odile. She wouldn’t hide that she’s in a timeloop, she doesn’t have that fear of abandonment Siffrin has. But she would definitely not bring it up unless she thought it was important. That would lead to… conflict. She would essentially become the opposite of Mirabelle, trying to speedrun, get the loops as consistent as possible, and that means only disclosing information when it is necessary rather than when it is helpful. And unlike Siffrin, who is bad at hiding things, she won’t become an actor like him and try either. She’ll embody pure apathy and not even try to hide her pain.

Moreover, Odile said it herself. She would do horrible things to keep everyone safe. Perhaps harming them, for their own good perhaps, would be one of those things. It could take a hundred loops. But in that regard, Odile has a breaking point I believe.

Bonnie can be summed up like this: no. They are a child, it would end badly. They’d probably cry every loop because everything is so scary, overwhelming, and terrifying. It doesn’t matter how smart they are, they cannot and should not go through something like that. It would be meaningless suffering.

Now, Isabeau. Isabeau is the smartest member of the group, by a long shot. Probably not in the academic sense like Odile, but in the practical sense. He has practical knowledge, he knows about relevant lore, he can extrapolate about magic theory, he’s articulate and can do quick math, and he has fantastic charisma and insight to navigate social situations. He can figure things out, sort out his emotions and be honest with his family, So, how does he suffer?

He stops trying to use any of it. He stops trying to burden his family with his struggles. After a point, he thinks “well I’m invincible, might as well go into the house on my own a couple loops to scout out!” He’ll try to take every weight from their shoulders every loop, no matter what. And the sheer pressure and repetition will break him. Until he simply cannot move anymore. Til he loops, and collapses in front of the favor tree. Unlike Odile, he’ll try to do new things, but unlike Mirabelle, he will fail because he will try to do everything at once.

Now, I feel most confident in my Mirabelle analysis, and less confident in my other ones. But there are 2 things I’ve been ignoring that are important to bring up, which I will mention here:

First, Loops were officially broken when Mirabelle froze the King in time and satisfied both Vauguarde’s and his wish simultaneously. If everyone is being transparent with Mirabelle from the start or she’s the one looping, what’s to stop her from discovering that shield ability in the first place and solving things then and there? This is a… complex concern, and one I’m unsure how to answer. But I think I know:

Siffrin is the only one capable of learning about wish craft. They are the only one from the country, the only one who knew his wish, and the only one that can read that text. If Siffrin isn’t looping, they cannot acquire the memory of memories to progress. So, they’d likely not learn the reason behind the loops, and it would take so much longer for them to break the loops. Long enough to give up.

But then there’s the second issue. What about Loop? See, in all of these, I’m operating under the assumption that Loop is Siffrin. Siffrin is the only one who knows how to wish right, their wish is what causes the loops regardless of the target, they are the catalyst. But if you have Loop, then all should be good, right!?

Well… not exactly. Loop is Siffrin, and since a looper other than Siffrin will be interacting with them, they’ll likely be a lot less mean because they only hate themself and probably won’t be mean to their family. But they’re still Siffrin. They’ll probably still hide everything they can, and while they will reveal more they’ll always be terrified of doing so. Terrified of their family knowing. And again, Loop is about as in the dark as everyone. Loop likely will not leave the favor tree, will not join the party, will not try to acquire the memory of memories. They’ll be irrevocably stuck. Unable to progress to where Siffrin reached.

Ok, I think that’s all. In hindsight these ramblings were inane, but hey! Maybe you AU writers and artists can do something with this. Au revoir!

[winepresswrath]

hi! i always love your MDZS/CQL takes; can i ask what are the questions you think CQL is asking, as compared to MDZS?

I haven't actually revisited either canon in ages, which is making me nervous. what questions the novel is interested in can be pretty contentious all on its own! @mikkeneko has an excellent answer in the notes here which I reccomend to everyone. My own thoughts are honestly pretty scattered- I keep on deleting things and going hm, that's not quite right.

So, for the obvious-to-me example, people reasonably zero in on the creation of innocent doctors/radish farmers who Wen Ruohan is holding hostage. In CQL it's easy to infer that Wen Qing and Wen Ning are maybe the only cultivators and almost certainly the only combatants among the Wen remnants, and their status is much more ambiguous in the novel, which I personally think is asking, essentially, "and so what? were they wrong to run, when they had a chance? Do they deserve what Jin Guangshan will do to them if they go back? Aren't they just people, actually?" Whereas the question that CQL is asking is more to the effect of "What does Wen Qing owe these people, when she is their only defence? What is she entitled to do to save them, at other people's expense? If she fucks up that moral calculus, what then? Does it matter if she's personally fond of some of the outsiders who are going to get hurt? If one of them saved her brother? Later, this question will flip to what Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng, and the parallel to Jiang Cheng's situation in particular is, I think, genuinely pretty fun. You're giving up the Wen as soldiers who've laid down their arms in exchange for Wen Qing also grappling with leadership and the question of how many horrors she can stand to look the other way on to protect her own people. one reason I keep deleting so much is that a lot cql's changes were motivated at least in part by censorship, which I think we mostly share a general and justified distaste for! but I also think that within the bounds of that censorship the creative team put a lot of work into actually doing something interesting with those changes. Or, for another example- nieyao! There's a much greater emphasis on the nmj-jgy relationship, it's unambiguously very close and they are clearly extremely important to one another, and I think that's because the cql team has a lot to say about love, trust, power, and the ways those things interact, and that reflects back on all of the other relationships in play, including Wangxian. Almost every time, when CQL chooses change a relationship they make the characters in question closer- that's true for Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji, for Wen Qing and the Yunmeng contingent, for Zixuan and Mianmian, and Huaisang and Meng Yao. It's even true for Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian, who have a close and trusting relationship in first life! CQL puts a much greater emphasis on "all right, so you care, what next?" How do you choose someone and then choose to be good to them? What if there's a massive power disparity between you? What if you seriously disagree about your priorities and morals? How do you trust someone who's betrayed you? When is it a stupid choice to trust at all? How do you have faith that you know someone well enough for that trust to be meaningful?

for legal reasons i would like to specify that it's not that mdzs isn't interested in these problems. i do remember wangxian's literal trust fall. cql is asking these questions all the time about everyone. also for legal purposes i'm not suggesting that cql lwj and jc love each other. but! they establish a three month wartime partnership looking for wwx and then jc immediately drops him on wwx's say-so despite apparently having a positive enough opinion of him to tell wwx he thinks they should make up twice. lan wangji will later tell wwx he thinks he should loop jc in on the second flautist! these are people trying to navigate some kind of relationship/shared interest/community, as opposed to a hateful void. cql wants to say hey, how do you go about this? while I'm here and rambling cql also puts a lot of emphasis on wwx's connection to yunmeng and changes things up so instead of feeling alienated right before he leaves our last glimpse of him there is happily picking lotuses and playing with a kid! in both stories the narrative is asking who do you protect? who do you leave behind? can you ever get it back? but the angles are very different.

[notfreetoday]

MPW Language Analysis Part 2

Segasaki x Yoh: Shifts in Emotion and Acknowledging Roles

Masterlist || Language Analysis Part 1 || The Importance of Amae ||

In Japanese, one cannot utter a sentence without communicating at least two things: (1) the actual content of the message itself, the referential meaning; and (2) a metamessage about the relationship between the speaker and the listener, an indexical meaning. A striking feature about Japanese is that it is the latter message that most often assumes greater importance.

From: Creating an Ideal Self: Theories of Selfhood and Pedagogy at a Japanese Ethics Retreat by Dorinne K. Kondo

Every sentence that Segasaki and Yoh say to each other carries 2 meanings - the one we read in the subtitles, and too often, the one that never travels across the screen. The "miscommunication" that many perceive to be happening isn't always just about "using actions vs words" (though there is much to be said about that too) - the words are being used, but it's hard to hear them when said words are in Japanese and packed with information English is simply not designed to carry.

So, with 6 episodes of corrections made and nuances explained, it's finally time to get back to actually talking about how all of this adds to our understanding of the characters and of their relationship. In these 6 episodes, both Segasaki and Yoh have run the entire gamut of speech levels - but where Segasaki shifts consistently and with purpose, Yoh tends to shift as a reflexive, or reactionary response.

Or, what Segasaki choosing to shift up a speech level means to Yoh, and what Yoh's inconsistent shifts tells Segasaki (and us), about his emotional state. I'm kinda sorta not really sorry about this but ah, it's maybe possibly probably even longer than usual??

Quick Recap of Part 1:

We established two key aspects of their relationship:

1) They both acknowledge the power differential between them - Segasaki, by using "rougher" speech patterns, and Yoh, by tending to stick to the more polite end of the scale. 2) They both consider themselves to be from the same "in-group" - Both of them default to informal speech patterns when speaking to each other (even Yoh, despite being the junior/lower on the social hierarchy)

And now on to Part 2!

Changes in Emotion: Yoh

Yoh tends to experience his emotions rather intensely, and through his monologues we understand that he isn't always able to process these emotions immediately. As such, the shifts in his speech levels tend to happen subconsciously - there isn't an immediately obvious, predictable pattern to those shifts, because they are simply a reflection of how he's feeling in the moment.

Y: あ、いや。なんでもない…です* Y: Ah, iya, nandemonai…desu* Y: Ah, no, it's….nothing* The shift to polite form, and the awkward manner in which he does it, reflects Yoh's growing insecurity (See EP 2 for other examples).

From the moment Segasaki starts returning home late, Yoh becomes more and more unsure of where he stands with Segasaki, and this growing emotional distance is conveyed through his speech patterns becoming (awkardly) more polite than in Ep 1. He speaks hesitantly and indirectly, until he gets drunk (and even then, his insecurity still shows in how he barely switches down to rough speech during their not-argument).

In Ep 3, we again see Yoh shifting up to polite forms often, except this time, the shifts show his gratitude as well as sincerity.

Because of how ridiculously expensive the pork bun is, Yoh expresses his thanks by saying the full ありがとうございます (arigatou gozaimasu) here as opposed to just "arigatou" or other more casual forms. In return, Segasaki acknowledges the formality Yoh pays him with a nod (and a mouthful of pork bun).

Y: すいません Y: suimasen Y: I'm sorry This is the more formal version of "I'm sorry" (textbook pronunciation is sumimasen, but textbooks are for nerds Yoh's version is very common as well and still polite)

In both these scenes, Yoh switches to suimasen as opposed to his usual, and more casual, ごめん / ごめんなさい (gomen/gomen nasai), that he also uses in this episode. As previously mentioned, "sorry" in Japanese can also be used to mean "thank you". Here Yoh is doing both - apologizing for Segasaki having to "go the extra mile" to take care of him (ie, he feels he has imposed upon Segasaki - a fear he has mentioned a few times), and at the same time also expressing his gratitude for being taken care of. However, it's the shift up to the polite version that conveys his sincerity, and carries the extra message that - despite his regret at imposing on Segasaki - Yoh still values these moments and feels touched by them.

Both times, you see Segasaki taking note of this, albeit slightly confused, and probably a little shy too (Segasaki is after all, very good at picking up on social cues - especially Yoh's - and spends the whole of Ep 3 doing just that).

Y: 漫画が　とてもだめです Y: manga ga totemo dame desu Y: (My) manga is... really bad.

Yoh spends most of Ep 5 safely ensconced in the informal speech level, switching up only twice - the above scene, and later when he attributes his recovery to Segasaki's care as a way of thanks. The switch in the bathroom is sudden, and adds a sense of certainty to his statement that reflects the intensity of the despair he feels (even though he comes across as more kicked puppy than anything). The formality is also a way to "distance" himself from the reality of it, because it does hurt to acknowledge this.

All of these instances show us that Yoh's shifts up in speech levels tend to reflect when he's feeling vulnerable in some way - when he's insecure, dejected or hurt, or when he feels that he has imposed upon Segasaki.

So then, does Yoh also shift down?

Well, yes and no.

Left (Ep 4): Y: ふざけんな [very rude] Y: Fuzakenna Y: The hell are you doing! Right (Ep 5): Y: バカにすんなよ！[slurred vowels] Y: baka ni sun na yo Y: Don't look down on me!

Even if we include (just barely) the non-argument of Ep 2, there honestly aren't many scenarios in which Yoh shifts down to a "rougher" speech pattern - and he never drops as low as Segasaki does. This has to do with both his acknowledgement of the power differential that exists between Segasaki and him, as well as his less assertive nature. In fact, even when speaking to Man-san, with whom he shares his thoughts more freely, Yoh remains casual, but not rough. (Man-san is waaaay rougher than Yoh, tbh). Hence, when Yoh does shift down, it tends to be explosive and short lived, just like his frustration or anger.

So why "yes and no"? Because being lower in the social hierarchy also introduces another, more interesting way to express yourself - by choosing not to switch up.

We see this in Ep 5, when Yoh tries to lie about going to Man-san's place. He sticks to his baseline informal speech when he announces this, whereas he previously used polite speech in Ep 4. Is it possible that Yoh was simply overcompensating and trying too hard to sound casual to hide his lie in Ep 5? Yes. But before coming to that conclusion, there is another important detail to note - that instances like this, where Yoh doesn't switch up, have gradually been increasing as the show progresses.

In Ep 5 and 6, Yoh uses the slightly less formal gomen nasai to apologize (contrast this with Ep 2's suimasen mentioned earlier). Given that Yoh himself mentions in Ep 5 that he thought Segasaki would be angry, and in Ep 6 clearly underscores his apology with a proper bow (yes, there are standards to how you should bow in Japan) - you would think that these 2 situations would be the perfect time to switch back up again. So why? Once again, the key to unlocking the metamessage is the wider context; i.e., we need to consider what Segasaki has been doing. please indulge my desire to sound cool and mysterious despite already announcing it in the title

Establishing Roles: Segasaki

In direct contrast to Yoh, Segasaki is very consistent with his speech shifts, and a clear pattern emerges. First off - when Segasaki is angry with Yoh, he drops straight down.

Left (Ep 2): S: てめぇ [very, very rude] S: temee S: You Right (Ep 5): S: 分かってねぇだろ　分かってねぇから　泊りで仕事とか言い出すんだろうが [slurred Rs, word contraction, slurred vowels] S: wakattenee daro wakattenee kara tomari de shigoto toka ii dasun darou ga S: You don't do you? You don't understand and that's why you can just say things like you'll stay out to work overnight.

Like, waaaaaaaay down. The argument in Ep 5 is the most obvious example of this, but using "temee" to address someone like he does in Ep 2 is very very rude and, together with the "haaah?!" Segasaki says before this line, also does a lot to convey that he is Not Happy.

S: 明日は仕事すんのか [word contraction] S: ashita wa shigoto sun no ka S: すんのかしないのか、どっちだよ [word contraction, informal, assertive end particle] S: sun no ka shinai no ka, docchi da yo S: Are you working tomorrow? S: Working or not, which is it?

The lines in this interaction from Ep 3 aren't really rude per se - certainly not compared to temee - but they are rougher than his usual and very direct. We've seen Segasaki do this multiple times throughout the episodes - dropping his levels when he's being assertive, and it is in response to that assertiveness, that Yoh gives the following reply:

Y: いや、ないです [plain forms, but with the addition of desu form] Y: Iya, nai desu Y: No, I don't [have anything planned]

Mixing plain forms with -desu at the end makes Yoh's reply a little more formal, and is another way in which Yoh acknowledges the power differential between them. Being higher in the social hierarchy means Segasaki enjoys a greater sense of linguistic freedom, and shifts down in speech level are therefore unsurprising, and indeed, expected.

So, if there is no real need for Segasaki to shift up, then, what does it mean when he chooses to do so?

Left: S: まあ　残念ながら　相手は大嫌いな俺ですけど S: Maa... zennen nagara aite wa daikirai na ore desukedo S: Well, unfortunately, your partner is me - who you hate so much Right: S: 好きにさせてもらうけど...な ？ S: suki ni sasete morau kedo... na? S: I'll gratefully do as I please...yea?

After an entire episode of using Yoh's own words to tease him as a way to try and get Yoh to face his own feelings, Segasaki lands his sharpest and strongest push of the day in these 2 scenes not by reinforcing the hierarchy between them, but by subverting it. Shifting up to a more formal speech level when he doesn't have to, particularly in the second scene where he uses deferential word forms, creates the illusion of elevating Yoh in the hierarchy, which is then immediately undermined by the irreverent tone in which Segasaki says them.

In other words, Segasaki only shifts up as a power play.

S: よくできました S: yoku dekimashita

We first see Segasaki use this formal way of saying "well done" at the end of Ep 3 and again in Ep 4, and it brings to mind the literal stamp of approval that teachers often give to students in school. Here, there is no teasing or subversion of the hierarchy going on. Segasaki is establishing his role in Yoh's life - to provide and care for him - through the use of polite speech, and reinforcing the power differential between them in the most straightforward way possible.

This use of polite speech allows the speaker to indirectly index their social identity - often as one who is in charge or responsible. Within the Japanese household, it also happens when a role/obligation (often parental) is being carried out - eg , a parent might switch to polite speech to indicate their role as provider when asking the rest of the family "What would you like to eat?". Similarly, we again see Segasaki underscore his role in the following:

Left (Ep 5) S: ごちそうさまでした S: Gochisousama deshita S: Thank you for the food Right (Ep 4) S: 寝るなら部屋いきな* S: neru nara heya ikina S: If you're going to sleep, then go to the room alright?

In Ep 5, Segasaki leads the saying of this standard phrase, customarily said at the end of a meal to express gratitude to everything that made the meal possible. It is the use of the full, more formal version (as opposed to just gochisousama) that indexes his role as Yoh's caregiver when he leads in saying this, and indeed he spends most of Ep 5 enjoying that role. In Ep 4, although he does not quite use the -masu form here, the imperative form "ikina" brings to mind a parent trying to coax their child to bed, the same way Segasaki is doing to a very drunk and sleepy Yoh.

This is the key we were looking for - with every episode, Segasaki consistently reinforces his role in Yoh's life, the same way he consistently responds to and encourages Yoh's amae. And with every episode, Yoh becomes a little more confident of his place with Segasaki, a little more willing to believe that maybe Segasaki might really return his feelings. It's easy to look at Yoh in Ep 2, see him push Segasaki away, and think that the same Yoh appears in Ep 5, but that couldn't be further from the truth. Because in Ep 2, a drunk Yoh barely drops to rough speech, whereas in Ep 5, a sober Yoh feels safe enough to even "curse" a little (well, as far as cursing goes in Japan at least, which admittedly is not far). In both word and action, they have both grown, and have both contributed to the strengthening of their relationship.

So! In conclusion (omg we made it to the end) we have established that:

Segasaki has a clear, predictable pattern in his shifts - he switches up to formal when establishing or reinforcing his role in Yoh's life, but when he's serious, or angry with Yoh, he drops all the way down.

Yoh is less consistent, because his shifts tend to be more subconscious and reflective of his emotional state. He's more inclined to switch up when he's in a vulnerable state, eg, feeling insecure or dejected, or when he wants to express his sincerity in apologizing or showing gratitude. When he's nervous, or in response to Segasaki either being direct with him or upset with him, he'll sort of switch up too (ie, he'll mix polite forms with informal forms, or he'll try to say things in an indirect way).

Through the use of speech level shifts, both Segasaki and Yoh indirectly reinforce and acknowledge their individual roles in each other's life, and by observing the changes in these shifts over time, we the audience are able to track the progression of their relationship as well.

In the next part, we'll look at the differences in the way they speak to others versus between themselves - looking specifically at examples from Ep 4, 6 and 7.

As always, thank you for reading, and feel free to ask any questions! (*ˊᗜˋ*)/

[soobpricity]

this love - kang taehyun

letter 11 ; got lovestruck, went straight to my head

synopsis: what happens when soccer player!kang taehyun, who isn’t focused on school but is smart enough to pass, sees yn walk in the hallways nearly everyday after homecoming. taehyun’s new hallway crush begins to grow into something bigger, but what happens when he has to make a choice between yn or continuing to fail school ? will taehyun be able to focus on sports, classes, and trying to win yn over ?

you sat on the metal bench, watching as taehyun pulled himself over the metal bar. a layer of sheen sweat covering his body, his focus completely on pulling his chin over the metal bar. you watched as he completed his final set of pull ups, before dropping himself onto the foamy mat. he turned over to look at you, tiny smile on his face as he made eye contact with you. he walked over as you reached out his water bottle to him. he took it, occupying the seat next to you.

“thank you.” he spoke up, as he avoided touching you, not wanting to get you a touch of all of his sweat. however, you were the complete opposite, even turning your body a certain angle to face taehyun. throughout his workout, he noticed the way that your eyes lingered around his rather well built body. even though you tried to look away, your eyes eventually made their way back to him. even now, you still tried to look away.

“is there something you’d like to see ?” taehyun teasingly questioned, bringing his hands to roll up his sleeve. casually, sitting back against the wall with a small smirk on his face. he watched as your face became a bright tint of red, the shocked expression on his face made him quite confident.

“you’re such a tease.” you mumble under your breath, scoffing and taking your eyes off of taehyun. his small action and words making you feel so flustered. a tiny giggle left his mouth as he admired your features, grateful for your presence.

“ah ! yn, i brought the jersey !” taehyun excitedly exclaimed, grabbing his bag that was on the floor. you finally turned your head back towards him, your focus completely on the boy next to you. he hadn’t put his bag in a locker because he knew that you were coming over and he wanted to be sure to give you his jersey. he took out a neatly folded white and black jersey, handing it over to you. as you placed it in your lap, happily receiving the boy’s jersey.

“thank you, oh ! i have something to give you too, but i’ll give it to you right before the game !” you exclaimed, proudly looking at the boy. he seemed so excited by the thought of even receiving anything from you. this was all so new to him, he had to admit.. he wasn’t even this loving to nari. “by the way, what are you doing later.”

“mm.. i’m gonna finish up with a few more things, especially to practice my endurance.. once i get home, i’ll work on some homework.. i wouldn’t want to get behind again, huh ?” he raises his eyebrows, although he was genuinely worried about losing you all due to some grades. not that you would, but that worry was still in the back of his mind.

“you’re doing so well !” you proudly state, admiring taehyun’s new ability to successfully time manage and putting his all in his school work.

“heh i did learn from you..” taehyun laughed, placing a towel around his neck after tapping it a few times over his face. he dried the bullets of sweat, his breath finally catching up. you took a look at your phone, checking the time one last time before realizing that it was time to go home.

“tyun, i gotta go.. but ! i’ll be there for your first game of the season !!” you exclaimed, holding onto the jersey that he had just given you. “don’t forget that i have something to give you before the game..”

you stood in front of taehyun, his eyes were full of seriousness, whereas his posture and demeanor was quite the opposite. taehyun was a pro at hiding his true emotions, at least when it came to soccer. he knew that opponents grew confident at the sight of a weak opposing team, which was why he kept himself so focused on his attitude.

“tyun ?” the boy turned his focus back to you, attentive to your every feature. a smile returning to his face as he began to actually grow confidence. he wasn’t typically someone who got nervous so easily. but he wanted to put on a good performance in front of you and he didn’t want to mess up.

although, taehyun gained more comfort as he saw you in his jersey, his number resting on the back of the jersey. you looked so pretty in his clothing, the jersey fitting you quite oversized which only made his heart flutter.

“you’ll be okay, right ?” you asked, worried for the boy who still seemed a bit out of it. not that you were doubting him, but he still seemed so.. deep in thought. he nodded, patting your head.

“of course i will, thank you for coming..” he softly spoke to you, holding onto your hand. which you suddenly took into your grasp, holding his hand with one hand as you took out a red piece of ribbon with the other. you tied the ribbon around his wrist, tightly securing it so that it wouldn’t fall off. he lingered his eyes from the piece of ribbon on his wrist to your eyes. his eyes now full of love and adoration instead of the seriousness that had previously taken over.

“for good luck !” you spoke, holding his hand in yours. a happy smile resting on your face, seeing his demeanor change as he pulled you into his arms. his embrace warm and fulfilling, his worries completely depleting as he finished hugging you. pulling away, before placing a kiss on your cheek.

“thank you..” he whispered into your ear, leaving gentle touches amongst your body.

“hold up.. there’s still one more thing i need to give you..” you replied, pretending to grab something from your bag before looking back at taehyun and pressing a kiss on his lips. taehyun was shocked, but it wasn’t long after that he melted into your hold. placing his hand on your cheek, cupping your face. a satisfied grin resting on his face as he felt pleased with all the things he was receiving from you. you pulled away, a small giggle leaving your mouth.

“thank you for all the gifts, love..” he replied, an enormous grin sitting on his face as he placed on last kiss on your cheek. “now.. go sit down so you can get the best view of me..” he tucked your hair behind your ear, hand still holding onto one of your own.

“okay !! i’ll be cheering you on !” you slowly let go of his hand, waving goodbye as you slowly walked back to the bleachers and taking a seat between sunghoon and ning ning who had agreed to accompany you to taehyun’s first soccer match of the season, meanwhile beomgyu was sitting next to sunghoon as he was quite interested to see how athletic taehyun truly was.

sunghoon drank from his slushie, the four of you had agreed to hang out before the game and that thankfully included going out to eat. ning ning, being the kind person that she is, had paid for everyone’s tickets; excluding you, since taehyun had invited you as his plus one which was apparently a thing. he tried to get all your friends a free way in, but it only resulted into a bit of a life lesson from his coach.

his coach was rather happy to see you so connected with taehyun. he knew that you were good news, he knew that taehyun would do even better in your care. which he was proven correct, as taehyun was no longer slacked off in his classes and was always on top of his game. so far he had been managing classes and soccer, even his relationship with you.

your eyes followed taehyun’s figure, watching as he dribbled the ball. moving from one side to another, avoiding the cones that were set up on the field. however your eyes were truly just on the ribbon that was tightly tied onto his wrist, the red ribbon symbolizing good luck as you had learned from the internet after being so indecisive on what color ribbon was the right one to give him.

“wearing his jersey and now pretending to know or even care about the sport.. you’re seriously committed, yn.” sunghoon commented, a cheeky smile appearing as he teased you for wearing taehyun’s jersey to the game. you beamed, pure happiness eliciting straight from you.

you sat still, eyes continuing to follow the boy as the game started, the referee placing the ball straight in the middle with taehyun waiting in his spot right in front of the ball since he was the lucky one to start the match off instead of the opposing team.

you kept your eyes on taehyun throughout the entire game. watching as he went from one side of the field to the complete opposite end. you’re attention spanning from taehyun to the score board which currently displayed ‘home: 2, away: 1’ nervousness filled your body, even though taehyun and his team was currently winning, the other team could easily catch up. they knew that taehyun was the ace, there was a reason why he was team captain, he wasn’t just a great leader but he was just an outstanding player in general.

since the opposing team had noticed that taehyun was their best player, they decided a new game plan during half time : injure taehyun without getting a huge consequence. surely they could play this off as long as they were sure to get taehyun on the bench without seriously injuring him or making their plan too obvious to the referee.

so it began, constant slide tackles which taehyun was on the receiving end, constant pushing when the referee had their eyes’ elsewhere. and since their wasn’t any kind of var, since this is a high school game, there wasn’t any kind of way for the referee to see their dirty tricks if the referee’s attention wasn’t on them to begin with.

taehyun was losing patience but he still managed to stay composed, after all this wasn’t the first time that an opposing team was attempting and even struggling to get to his head and hurt him. he had gone through this multiple times and he knew not to let the other team win, he was better than that, he knew how to control his feelings.

while you on the other hand, well… let’s just say that so far beomgyu and sunghoon had to force you back into your seat multiple times. a few apprehensive words left your mouth, angered at the other team for even THINKING of hurting your lover. taehyun, in your eyes, was too precious to get hurt and he didn’t deserve getting harmed. taehyun had caught a glimpse of your sudden bursts of pure outrage as he witnessed you suddenly stand up from your seat, pointing at the other team as sunghoon and beomgyu tried their best to get you to take a seat.

taehyun looked down to his wrist, the bow that you had tightened around his wrist was now a little.. tilted and one side dangled a little more ribbon than the other side. not to mention, there were green stains from the grass beginning to appear on the red ribbon. he gained a sort of strength from seeing the red ribbon tied around his wrist. it was enough to keep taehyun going, feeling his stamina begin to return, he had to impress you or else he wouldn’t be okay with facing you after embarrassing himself. even though you were going to love him either way.

taehyun ran across the field, making a few passes to his teammates, soobin passing it to yeonjun, who only passed it to huening kai before the ball made its way back to taehyun and into the goal. the 60th minute arriving as taehyun finished stalling after his last goal which resulted in a win for taehyun and his team. the time had been shortened as it was a school game and they weren’t allowed to go the full 90 minutes, but the opposing teamed cursed themselves and taehyun, believing that if they had a few more minutes and a few more chances to hurt taehyun then they would’ve won. but in reality, it was all just a skill issue !!

taehyun took a sip from his water bottle, before his eyes shifted to you, which you were already waiting for him by the exit of the field. he practically threw his water to the side, running over towards you and throwing his arms wide open before stopping right in front of you after realizing how dirty and sweaty he was, he put his arms back to his sides, his smile never disappearing.

“yn !! how did i do ? wasn’t i just great ?” taehyun had basically just praised himself, expecting to get more praise from you.

“no !! you suck !! how could you just let them try to hurt you like that !?!? you should’ve smacked them and thrown them on the floor !! that way they could’ve gotten a taste of their own medicine.” although taehyun’s heart had nearly stopped at your first few pair of words, he couldn’t help but giggle at your comment.

“love, y’know i can’t hurt them, that’s illegal in the game.. and it’s illegal in actuality..”

“no, i think it counts as self defense.”

taehyun wished that this night could last forever, how he wishes that he could hear you complain about the opposing team all night long. hopefully he would, one day.. maybe if he was lucky enough, none of this would go wrong and he would be able to keep you as his supporting partner for as long as possible.

©️soobpricity

this love taglist : @run2seob @soobadooba @soobnuuy @pockychuwu @crazynyctophilia @rencarnationofangel @esther-kpopstan @mrsyawnzzn @matcha-binz @michinri @hanstarrs @ariam-96 @pinkheadflowers @kittyhyuka @run4gyu @txnwvc

an: OH EM GEE NEKO FINALLY UPDATED… it’s still thursday for me SO TECHNICALLY I ONLY MISSED OUT ON TUESDAY !! i actually had so much fun writing this chapter once i got the hang of it, and omg is this all about to go.. (up or down 🤭)