#everyone go play in stars and time NOWW!!!!!

[medi-bee]

when the stars are in time or sometthing

[ticklikeabomb]

Convincing Loki to help you out (HC to Mini Series : Part 2

Pairing : Avengers x PlusSize Reader (Gender Neutral) ; Loki x PlusSize Reader (platonic)

Warning : Language

Word Count : 2.8k

A/N : This is part 2 of what was originally a Headcanon/One-shot. You can find Pt 1 here :) This takes place during Endgame events but not following the course of the movie. 

Disclaimer : I do not own the the rights of any of these characters nor the universe itself. This is purposely for entertainment mainly. 

He looked at you wide-eyes before collecting himself and cleared his throat. "I have a question. Why do you talk so much?" You weren't expecting that but still answered, "I'm not used to company so I guess I got carried away." You saw the wires turn on his pretty little head and smirked. "So Mischief what's your plan now : you gonna go all Goth on me or do you actually wanna help us this time?", you asked him straightforward. He chuckled before a large smirk playing on his features. "When do we start?" You looked back at Natasha who nodded and opened the cage. He stepped outside and marched at you, scanning you up and down. "Follow me, the others are waiting", you told him. He stepped closer and whispered in your ear, "Your ribs are broken." "Yeah about that it would be kind of you to not mention it." He chuckled again and followed you to the meeting point. 

You arrived in front of the others, Natasha at one side and Loki at the other and declared, "Showtime baby".  

——

"Where's the scepter?", asked Natasha. "We couldn't get it. We were surrounding it, I mean our past us. It was too risky to apprehend it", exclaimed Tony. You sighed in annoyance and threw your hands in the air, "You had one job. One"

"How are we gonna go back now with one more person?", asked Clint eying Loki suspiciously, not really fond of him since the God mind-controlled him with the Tesseract back during the New York Battle. You thought for a second, a hand compressed on the side like the sassy bitch they all thought you were by now, even if the pose was in fact to compress the pain on your ribs. "If you use some of your ju-ju or whatever, it might work", you turned towards Loki. "And why would I do that?", he smirked. "wHy wOuLd I dO tHaT? Because if you don't, we'll bring you back to your stupid donut-cell and let you in there to rot", you spat at him not in the mood. A bright smile formed on his lips before he nodded and agreeing in doing as you said. 

"My children, hands please", you sang out getting their attention back and saw most of them doing so, except for Clint who was supposed to take Loki's hand. "I refuse", he mumbled his arms crossed. "NOWW", you threatened him, your eyes glowing like stars in the sky. His eyes widened and the other's bodies tensed but he  still wasn't willing to comply. Loki rolled his eyes and transformed himself as Clint's wife. "Better now?", he asked. Clint clenched his jaw, his eyes becoming glossy before taking his hand. You felt some of Loki's power curse through you and managed to gather enough energy to transport all of you back in time, to the current timeline. 

Once you all reached the compound, everyone fell to their knees, Tony throwing up (again because he's a stubborn dumb hot daddy) on the floor. Everyone stood up one by one except you. "What about them?", noticed Thor. "Why aren't they standing up?" Loki squatted down and felt your pulse. "That's because they're in . ..", he began but your screams cut him short. "AHHHHRRGG MOTHERFUCKERRRRRRR" Steve took Loki off guard and punched him, "What did you do to them?" The God of Mischief smiled and replied, "I did nothing. They had broken ribs before the teleportation. I guess they broke the rest of it" They all began talking one over the other, blaming Loki or someone else. "LAWKKKYYYYYY, care to help here", you groaned. He rolled his eyes and eventually put your ribs back in place. "What the hell", commented Tony. "Yeah I know, I almost died back there but I'm back again. So, next phase of the plan", you continued like nothing happened. 

At the corner of your eye, you saw Loki step back carefully. "Hey, where do you think you're going?", you shout at him. He smirked before trying to make his exit but was shook to the ground by electroshocks. Turning around, Thor had activated the chip on his brother. Everyone looked at him and he simply shrugged, "I knew he was gonna flee so I kept this little device from our trip from Sakaar before Thanos destroyed our ship." You pointed at him and declared proudly "Thor, my man." Walking to Loki who was in agony on the ground, his eyes wide, you smiled. "You do as agreed and we stop it." "Fine", he said through greeted teeth. You gave him a hand helping him stand up and whispered in his ear "Let's get to work honey." 

Everyone was gathered around the main room trying to come up with a plan when Nebula informed she knew where her father was. "Alright, we'll go to him and get the stones, reverse the course and bring everyone back along", mentioned Rhodes. "We don't know if it will work", counterattacked Bruce. "If there's a chance to bring them back, we have to do it. For them", said Natasha. Their arguments were stopped by the sound of someone sipping the rest of a remaining coke with persistence. They all looked at you and you widened your eyes, "Sorry". 

"Let's go kill that son of a bitch", dramatically exclaimed the Captain. You wished you had popcorn but that would push them to the limits. They decided that Tony should stay back in the compound for medical purposes. "You're not coming?", asked Natasha. "Nope. Besides I have to keep an eye on this one", you replied while motioning towards Loki who rolled his eyes. "What if we need you?", asked Rocket. "Oh believe me, you don't need me when you have that badass", you pointed at Carol who smirked.

You saw them depart and turned towards Loki, "Want to fuck?", you wiggled your eyebrows. Your request caught him off guard and before you let him reply you laughed out loud, "Nah I'm joking. I'm asexual but your face was priceless." "Please someone get me out of here", he breathed out. The Avengers returned several hours later with defeated faces. You already knew why but abstained from saying anything. They needed to know and see by themselves. "How's Plum face?", you asked. Nebula's piercing gaze turned in a flash towards you and replied with a much more deeper voice, "He's dead." "So are the stones, gone, vaporized, puff", completed Rhodes. Your jaw clenched not because of the not so new intel but because you failed your purpose. "I see", you breathed out. You saw Natasha battling her tears from falling before she left. Carol declared she had other engagements on other planets and told them to call her whenever they needed her. You turned towards Loki and took him aside. "I need you to take care of your brother and the rest of Asgard's people." "What do you mean the rest?", he asked suddenly intrigued. "Just promise me you will. Thor needs you more than anything. He already lost you once, he can't lose you again." After finishing that sentence you disappeared. He came back to the main room alone and Steve asked him where you were. "They're gone", was Loki's only answer. 

5 years later

"I just took a DNA test, turns out I'm a hundred percent that bitch, even when I'm crying crazy. Yeah I got boy problems, that's the human in me. Bling bling, then I solve'em, that's the RAT. Arghh gross", you sang out load before seeing the nasty animal. You waited for Jerry to do his work. "May the world bless your accomplishments little hero", and saw him walk trough the button that opened up the Quantum Realm's machine where Scott was trapped. He flew through the truck and ended on the corner of his stored garbage. Groaning in pain, he pressed the helmet of his suit. After preventing his suit to get caught on fire, he looked up and saw you perched on a table whistling the rest of Queen Lizzo's song, even though the song had been released a few years ago, it was still a classic.  "Where am I and who are you?", he asked. "You are in a storage unit and I'm Y/N", you shrugged. He shook his head in confusion and continued, "What the hell am I doing in a storage unit?"

"That's a long story and we've been waiting for your return for 5 years now. Orange slices?", you proposed. He gladly took them with a bright smile before turning back to you, "Wait, wait, wait. What do you mean 'it's been 5 years'?" "Come on little ant, I'm sure you're dying to see someone", you convinced him to follow you. During the ride, his eyes scrutinized a devastated city, neighborhoods in construction and trash all over the place. "What happened?", he asked. "There was an Alien called Thanos who managed to collect the Infinity Stones and decided to go all Cher and snap half of living form out of the universe. We're here", you told him and recognizing his daughter's house, he ran off the car to the front porch. You saw the emotional reunion between him and his daughter but had to cut the moment short by honking. "Where are we going?", he asked you. "WE are going to pay the Avengers a little visit", you chanted. 

At the entry of the Avengers compound, Scott turned towards you but you had already vanished. Confused, he got out of the car and waved at the camera until the front gate opened up. The three protagonists stood at the same room where a virtual conference was being hold a few minutes ago, confusion written on all of their faces. "Scott? Are you okay?", asked Steve, his arms crossed in front of his chest. "Yeah", nodded Scott before continuing. "Have any of you guys studied quantum physics?" "Only to make conversations", replied Natasha. "Alright. So", Scott began to explain what had happened him 5 years ago to the moment he came back, which was a few hours ago. "And then that person stood there, which by the way I don't recall the name. Maybe I should have asked them their name again? Anyway, they drove me to my daughter and vaguely explained to me once I've finished my, and I quote 'detox therapy among floating germes', about what happened with some giant 'purple walking dildo', again not my words. And the next thing I know is that we had to pay you a visit", he rambled before Steve stopped him, "Wait Scott, hold on. We?" "Those quotes sound sassily familiar", commented Natasha. "You think it's Y/N?", Steve turned towards the red-blond-ish ex-assassin. "Yes, that's the name but they vanished out of the blue", added Scott enthusiastically. Steve led out a heavy sigh before answering, "Yeah apparently it's one of their favorite things to do." 

"Now now Rogers, I know you're devastated but referring me as a drop-out is cold", you appeared next to Scott and looked at him, a hand on his heart, scaring him. "That's exactly what you are", said Steve. "What are you doing here?", asked Natasha as hostile as Steve. "I came to offer my services", you simply replied to which they scoffed. "What makes you think we want your help?", replied Steve bitterly. "Because you'll take every help you can get to defeat Thanos." "You told me he was dead?", asked Scott confused. "He is but there is another way to bring everyone back", you said and looked at Steve. "They're right, I was in a place called the Quantum Realm and time works differently there. What if there was a way to navigate it and enter the quantum realm at a certain point in time and then exit the quantum at another point in time", he mumbled fervently with a half-eaten sandwich. "Wait are you talking about a time machine?", asked Steve. You rolled your eyes and exclaimed, "Good Lord yes. What he's trying to say is that with the quantum realm we have a way to go back in time without using all of my power and preventing me from dying in the process. It just needs to be apprehended", you spoke up. "So who do we talk about this?", said Scott. 

The next thing you know is that you paid a visit to Tony Stark who, settled down, refused to lose what he had. Which led us to where we were currently sitting, a diner. Bruce, well Hulk, more like Hulce was telling them how he managed to combine his new self before being interrupted by children. After what seemed a everlasting awkward exchange between Scott, the kids and Hulce, the green man dabbed. "Ok that was way to weird, even for me", you commented. "Let's get to work", added Steve. The other Avengers were convoked as soon as possible. You even got to see new Asgard with its 'rightful' ruler. Wearing an all black outfit and a man-bun you called out to him, "Yo goth version of prince charming how's the Mortal life?" He turned around and chuckled, "I had that itching, annoying sensation that I would see you one day." "Need a hand with that?", you smirked. "What do we owe you the pleasure?", he asked while checking the harbor's provisions lists. "Ready to save the world and at the same occasion take your revenge regarding Tinky Winky?" He looked at you confused and you had to explain him the reference. "I see." "You're guys coming or do you need a private room?", called out Rocket. "Lead the way", Loki motioned you forward. You took a seat and saw Thor, "My man ", you fist pumped him and saw a wide smile form on his face. 

Back at the compound, everyone gathered in the main room and began working on building the big-sized quantum realm portal. Seated at the back of the room you attentively looked at them work while you mentally planned on how to fulfill your destiny. 

"Could you give us a hand?", turned Steve annoyed your way. "What? And deprive myself from those amazing muscles flexing so beautifully. You must be dreaming", you replied with a wide smirk, seeing Steve, Tony, Loki, Scott, Thor and Natasha all sexily sweating at work, your comment making Tony chuckle. You stood up and walked to Natasha and Nebula who were preparing the weapons. You made some cocktails and handed them to them. They eyed you and you took a gulp of your own drink. "If we're potentially dying, let's at least enjoy the last moments", you simply shrugged. They agreed and slowly took a seep from their drinks. "So are you more gun or knife?", you asked them. "Gun", answered Natasha and Nebula went with knife. "What about you?" You took another gulp and took out a unique weapon. "Swords", you told them and smiled when you saw their eyes widen at the beauty of the weapon. Nebula was about to reach it when you made it vanish. "Careful there, you touch it and it will burn you to death. See this weapon was created especially for me and everyone else who comes in contact with it dies painfully and instantly. Once I'm dead, the sword will belong to the person I find most worthy and rightful to acquire it. But of course, that is if I'm even able to die." 

"What do you mean?", asked Rhodes who heard the whole conversation. You turned to him and noticed that everyone stopped working and was looking at you. "It means what it means !", you responded without giving out more details and decided to take some air outside. You stood there for a while contemplating the sky before exclaiming, "Hiding is not really your forté, I know you're there." He walked and stopped beside you. "You're a mystery even for me", said Loki. "Talent", you simply replied. "Why are you really doing this? Helping us?" Without looking at him, you responded, "While you sink revenge, I seek redemption. I failed my mission and now it's time for me to face the consequences and do the best as I can to redeem myself." He thought about your comment and before he talked again, you exclaimed, "Look at you being all fair player with everyone. Hard to believe that we're in front of the 2012 Loki version." He narrowed his eyes and frowned before letting his angry facade disappear and chuckled. "If got time to reflect and to come to my senses." "I'm glad you did, not that I don't particularly like that whole 'Kneel before me kinky Loki' but myeah", you laughed as he shook his head. You both decided to get back inside and joined the others, who were gathered on the main room, coming up with what Scott called the Time Travel Heist. 

* gifs not mine, credit to owners*

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[interrogatormentors]

Event Two: Straight Flush

CA: if thats howw shits gotta be i get it CA: i really do CA: just lettin you knoww youre gonna regret this. CA: and by the time you realize wwhat a fuckin mistake youvve made in pushin me awway CA: ill be far beyond your reach

-- caligulasAquarium [CA] has left the memo! --

By this point in Eridan Ampora’s life, he knew space as lonely and fickle. He knew that the gaps between stars yawned millennia, and trolls at the top clawed and stabbed each other in the back at every opportunity. As a graduate of the Fleet Academy, Eridan knew this very well. What he hadn’t been prepared for was all the fucking paperwork.

Eridan stared at the blinking cursor on the scheduling spreadsheet in front of him, but no matter how hard he crossed his eyes the numbers never started making sense. As a well-established Dreadnought Condescension team, the DC Reichenbach’s crew all possessed equally established habits and schedules. Needless to say they didn’t take too kindly to an uppity new Head Admin coming in and shuffling shit around.

Eridan leaned back in his chair, lifting his glasses to pinch the bridge of his nose. The ship had one of its usual hiccups then, the lights flaring as an energy shift took place. Wonderful. With his free hand Eridan fumbled for the intercom button. “Get back in the helm, Riesse.”

After a pause a light blinked on the callbox at Eridan’s side, indicating an incoming call. “Yo, it’s been a perigee. Use my name or I riot,” said Riesse.

“Oh, funny, I can’t see Shakes anywhere on your file Riesse.”

“C’mon.”

“No.”

“Errrridan.”

Eridan rested his head on his desk, staring at the floor as he tried to gather himself.

“Shakes. You’ve got a break from the helm tomorrow, we can’t keep usin’ antimatter engines like this. You know that the maintenance for it costs a fuckin’ fortune-”

“Mmmmyeah we can,” Riesse or Shakes or whatever the fuck that fucking brown’s name was. Eridan was tired of battling about it, but he still felt an obligation to protest. “I got shit to do with Bricks.”

“And the captain, and the Chief Intelligence Officer,” Eridan said. Further slouching caused his glasses to slip right off his nose onto the floor. “You can’t all take a break at the same time every week.”

“Yeah, we can,” said Shakes. “God, haven’t you ever heard of like, free time and social bonding? You should join us sometime. Bricks’ got a rad as hell campaign set up and Illhal said she might be transferring. We’ve got an open spot. Table’s big enough for one mooore. Loosen up, holy shit.”

Eridan hung up the call. “Uppity fuckin’ mudfucker,” he said, picking up his glasses from the floor. “Oh wow, let’s just stick a bulge in the captain, get free breaks just whenever.” 

Ever since the helming techs had come out with mobile helmsman upgrades, highbloods who had quadrants with psionic lowbloods were crawling all over it. Some lowblood sympathetic fleet captains and helming techs and docterrors had written essays about the benefits of this new technology, which boasted alleged benefits such as increased helmsman longevity and better synchronization to the ship’s systems. The technology actually meant that those lowbloods with highblood quadrants were guaranteed the ability to move if their quads got their own ship and the rank of fleet captain, and it also meant that said lowbloods came with a hefty pair of globes to match.

Eridan tried to assure himself that he shouldn’t have been surprised. The Reichenbach’s captain was a piece of work to say the least, and her matesprit was such a cocky bastard with no respect for his blood superiors. As blood equals, with Captain Nekara as his superior in age and rank, Eridan kept his mouth shut to humor her smug piece of shit matesprit who jittered with ridiculous amounts of excess psionic energy.

Eridan’s palmhusk started beeping then, letting him know about breaktime, and he cast a defeated look to the stark and empty crew schedule. Normally he’d just work through his break, considering he never had other obligations. This time, he tried something new.

[Welcome to Poker Palace Server 2022A, caligulasAquarium, apocalypticTreeswing, circuitryCloser, torpidAnnihilator! Please read the rules and have fun! Currently there are 40 viewers of this game.]

AT: aw (fuck) aw beans aw no AT: playing with (fucking) TA?????? CC: hhehhe get wrekt dood CA: wwhat CA: do you knoww each other AT: nah dude’s a (damn) bot or whatever and wins every (fucking) time AT: shoot i wanted to bet money on this match too CC: just bet on TA man CC: thhey’re like always online ur going to make a hHELLA profit AT: my pride tho CA: wwhat pride AT: DUDE :*C

Poker didn’t seem too labor intensive, especially when Eridan could theoretically still work on the schedule on the other monitor. As time progressed he instead found that the match he’d gotten roped into took all his focus after the user torpidAnnihilator wiped the floor with all of them as apocalypticTreeswing had warned. Users could theoretically stay for infinite matches, and so a rematch began.

TA won again.

And again.

Over and over TA called bluff after bluff, and unveiled hand after winning hand after intimidating everyone else, even as AT and CC left and were replaced by other users. Each user expressed dismay at seeing TA there, but something in Eridan had been awoken.

He needed to win. So he kept playing even as his break ended, eyes flicking from schedule to poker match as he continued to lose over and over. He could have fun and loosen up, totally. He just had to win first.

[Welcome to Poker Palace Server 3014C, caligulasAquarium, torpidAnnihilator, gentrificationAwaiting, corporealTone! Please read the rules and have fun! Currently there are 67 viewers of this game.]

CA: ready to lose fucker CA: you cant wwin forevver CT: ...what CA: do i look like im talkin to you GA: i mEan it’s an opEn chatroom, so GA: if you’rE talking to TA good luck haha, CA: ivve been goin at it for four perigees hes gotta lose sometime CT: ...lol GA: LOL, GA: i’vE bEEn playing for tEn swEEps!! GA: thEy don’t losE!  CA: wwell wwere gonna see about THAT noww wwont wwe CA: if youvve got a penchant for believvin anyone that isnt the empress can be infallible youre sadly fuckin mistaken CA: one wway or another im gonna fuckin provve it and then youll eat your fuckin wwords. chumps

TA said nothing as per usual, but this silence stopped bothering Eridan long ago. He had become used to the empty silence that filled the digital lobby during games. Every muscle in Eridan’s body tensed as time went on and he focused, watching everything unfold as he kept his cards close to his virtual chest. The match concluded as it usually did, with GA and CT folding and TA refusing to show their hand. After playing this long, however, Eridan had learned to take his chances. If they needed to, TA usually folded or called a bluff second. This time they’d held onto their cards.

CA: bluff you dont havve shit CT: ...we both got shit hands you know hes got a good one CA: still callin it

With the bluff called, TA’s hand flipped over to reveal a four, two fives of separate suits, and an eight. Not necessarily a bad hand, but not a good one. The entire world stopped and Eridan felt a funny lurch in his digestive sack. He lurched to his feet, staring at the screen for a good minute.

For so many perigees, Eridan had worked towards this very moment. Each second that he stood there taking slow, shaking breaths to comprehend what had just happened felt like an eternity of downright euphoria. He’d done it.

However the world, and more importantly the game, wouldn’t wait forever. He moved his shaky hands to type out the damning words.

CA: straight flush CA: i wwin

A silence followed, and Eridan felt so fucking giddy, like there were clouds below his feet. He hadn’t felt this good in perigees. The commenters who had been gossiping about the inevitable outcome of the match had lapsed into shock with the other players also at a loss. TA, as always, remained silent. Finally, GA and CT began to type, almost in unison.

GA: what CT: ...holy shit GA: arE you fucking serious no WAY you’rE cheating! CA: if this wwere anythin but an online servver i wwould be less insulted CA: i cant code my wway out of a wwet paper bag CT: ...still theres no way you couldve beaten him of all people CA: look a lot of this game is luck okay wwhat the fuck are you talkin about CA: havve you evven played poker before in your life TA: Huh. TA: Well, thII2 II2 a 2urprII2e. TA: ThII2 game wa2 quIIte refre2hIIng, thank you. CT: ...hhhhhhhooooh my god

The match closed itself then, leaving Eridan staring at his victory screen. Something about that quirk seemed familiar, but he shook the thought away. The one he’d known with that quirk had disappeared a sweep before Eridan himself had left the rebellion. He had to be dead by now. Friend requests started pinging on his poker profile as he sat there, viewers of the match itself enamored by the new champion. More than a few angry messages popped up, considering TA’s popularity in betting circles. Only one private message caught Eridan’s attention.

TA: Let me know IIf you would lIIke to play me agaIIn 2ometIIme. TA: II am very aware you have been 2talkIIng 2erver2 lookIIng for me and that would 2ave 2ome ha22le on your end II thIInk. TA: That was the mo2t fun II have had for a whIIle. TA: II may have two quIIt 2oon con2IIderIIng your mo2t deft humIIlIIatIIon, but fIIndIIng a new hobby II2 laborIIou2.

Eridan reread the messages at least five times to absorb just what the mysterious reigning champion of the poker ring was actually offering. There was an odd little flutter in his chest, something he’d thought he’d never feel again. Pride, and a well-earned, well deserved sense of pride at that. Acknowledgement by an ever-supreme master at a craft, even for something as little as poker, meant worlds to him. He couldn’t help the grin that crossed his face, still on a euphoric high  at the sudden turn of events.

CA: uh wwoww okay CA: look evveryone loses evventually unless youre hackin or wwhatevver CA: surprised no one else called you out TA: The thIIng about garnerIIng a reputatIIon IIn onlIIne communIItIIe2 II2 IIntimIIdatIIon and people fallIIng on your bulge in terror ju2t come2 wIIth the whole package. TA: And a2 you know, that II2 the name of the game. CA: i thought it wwas poker TA: What? TA: Oh, very funny. CA: oh my god you talk like a fuckin loser howw old are you TA: That II2 a very rude que2tIIon. TA: II wIIll 2ee you agaIIn, ErIIdan. All haIIl the Empre22. CA: all hail i guess

TA logged off then. Eridan continued to bask in his own victory before freezing, eyes scanning over the last few messages TA had sent.

That couldn’t be possible.

He took a moment, eyes fixed on that one sentence in the chatlog again before he flipped over to his personal profile. No, nothing there. He had made sure not to put any identifying information on his profile apart from his blood color code, which more than a few members did. His name wasn’t anywhere on the site.

Swallowing hard, Eridan closed the poker site down for now and opened this week’s schedule and maintenance logs. Only victory mattered, and he’d accomplished that. What could some random nobody on the internet do to him?

Maybe Shakes’ D&D session would be a little less nerve-wracking.