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#everyone needs some joe
allamericanb-tch · 6 months
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taylor swift wrote all the young dudes, no one believed it was really her, and then she wrote the great war to prove them wrong. 
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transpanda-1 · 2 years
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The most amazing thing about Uendo Toneido as a character with DID is that they are just some guy.
Like, unironically.
It's so insanely important to us that they're the "just some guy" of characters with DID because they established what the baseline of portrayals of DID should be.
They are, for all intents and purposes, "just some guy".
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kusuokisser · 1 year
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i think terusai diving date... i think that kokomi would enamor all the fish..i think kusuo would have to stop himself from staring at her while she smiles and plays with the fishies.. i think kokomi would be genuinely enjoying herself so much.. i think kusuo would be happy to be in the water.. i think kokomi would glance at kusuo sometimes just because she thinks he is beautiful... i think kusuo would be trying not to lose it.. i think a lot of things about them..
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solipseismic · 2 months
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"the dems are pro-genocide" "harris is just as supportive of genocide as biden" and what. do you think. the republicans think. of american imperialism and genocide? please. do let me know.
#the machine is working as intended. i cannot stress to you all enough. this is what america does.#this is what america did in korea. this is what america did in vietnam. this is what america does in the caribbean.#this is really and truly just what american imperialism does. this is not an aha gotcha moment.#this is the core of american politics. this is the intent and purpose of american imperialism. this is not new.#this is not new information. ok? i need everyone to understand this. it is not new information that american politicians#support american imperialism and by extension american-funded and -fueled genocide.#acting as though whoa if we vote harris into office she'll just continue the genocide!!! and what do you think trump will do?#what do we all think trump will do if he is in office? trump? the guy who is notorious for loving brown people?#especially those in other countries? right. right. right. ok. right.#yes absolutely be aware of the pitfalls and issues with american politics/politicians/the democratic party but ohhhh my god#genuinely really and truly sick of people going 'this is who you're voting for!!1!1! she's no better than genocide joe!!1!1!!'#IT'S HARRIS OR TRUMP BABY. AND AMERICAN POLITICIANS HAVE BEEN ENACTING GENOCIDE IN EVERY CORNER OF THE WORLD. FOR DECADES.#quite frankly not only is it fucking tiring for people to be acting as though there's some nuanced unproblematic third option#but it's just as fucking tiring to be acting like this is new. or somehow a revelation. jesus christ.#we still don't know how many korean civilains us soldiers massacred during the korean war. the number is in the tens of thousands.#conservatively. 30-40.000.#but we just don't know. but oh of course! of course this is new information that america commits atrocities in other countries!#of course this is new information that is only relevant now!!!!!#get the fuck out of here.#we just have to pick the better option and hope that we can slowly change one step forward at a time. there is no way to vote that#somehow changes or erases the fact that this is what american imperialism does.#fucking tiring that some ppl have the privilege of pretending otherwise.#jesus christ. how naive. how hopeless. how cruel. the families of nogun-ri are still lobbying for reparation.#and americans will act as though it's new information that american imperialism is a machine that chews countries up and spits them out#for the imf and foreign (american) corps to profit from.#god.#2024#croidhe#the death loop
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gillipop-plus · 5 months
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i have seen the tommyinnit bicurious clip and the joe hills scott smajor homophobia clip so now i feel like i understand
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cocoabeloved · 11 months
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just a quick reminder - absolutely NO joe alwyn slander/hate is welcome or allowed on my blog. it's frankly exhausting seeing how much swifties villianize him simply because of his break up of taylor. you don't even know him. neither do i, which is why i'm not going to pretend like i do. if you don't like what i said, that's respectfully not my problem. just leave the poor man alone, where's your human empathy god.
HEAVY rant down in the tags so beware.
#this is singlehandedly the last time i'm telling you this#absolutely zero slander#joe alwyn#taylor swift#i only talk about him if i see a mean post or smth??#but for now i'm not gonna bring him up#not because i'm tired of HIM exactly#but more because of how much hate he's been receiving from the fandom#the fandom who doesn't know a single fucking thing about his and taylor's relationship#this is EXACTLY why i don't feel comfortable being a swiftie tbh#because of toxic and mean swifties who attack joe and everyone else who isn't part of taylor's life anymore#including olivia (who hasn't done anything wrong except stop mentioning taylor?? which isn't a bad thing AT ALL)#y'all need to grow up get a job get an actual life and touch some grass while you're at all of that too#it's literal 20/30-YEAR-OLDS throwing hate#fucking twenty/thirty years olds#and i'm just a fucking teenager for crying out loud#yet grown ass immature swifties don't seem to comprehend what they're doing is wrong and mean and hurtful#this is a HUMAN BEING with real emotions who is being affected by all this shameful bullying#i'm obviously not talking about ALL swifties#my mutuals (who don't attack joe) are absolutely incredible and amazing - meaning this post is not directed towards them at all#i just need to express my distaste and disappointment in the swiftie community#in THIS house we respect and stan and love joe alwyn#not only because he helped and was there for taylor during one of the most darkest times of her life#but ALSO he's a good person who's done nothing wrong but want privacy#wanting privacy isn't a bad thing in any way shape or form#i'm not even trying to be rude or anything either?#i'm just telling the truth which is smth MANY parasocial swifties need to hear#some ppl (aka swifties) won't even bother to read this but honestly i don't even care?#.
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klinefelterrible · 9 months
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My mom, an elf healer: I am waiting for Joe, my brother's son, to come here next month.
Me, a half-elf rogue: What is he coming here for? Some healing stuff?
Mom: He will show me how to Read The Magic Rune Of Myths. It's been very popular lately.
Me: If it's very popular why don't you go to the Ting and learn it from someone else? Or ask some nearest rock?
Mom: I'm not bothered with waiting. I can wait another moon or so.
Me: You know, if it's very popular lately, almost anyone might know it. Even I could.
Mom: Yeah but do you have it?
Me: ...no?
Mom: Then maybe leave it to those who actually know it?
Me: How did Joe learn it in the first place?
Mom: I don't know. But he knows it and he will show me. He said he already has it.
Me: How about I learn it now?
Mom: You don't know how to Read The Magic Rune Of Myths, how are you going to know it?
Me: I guess I'm going to try by myself.
Mom: What if you fail?!
Me: What what if I fail?
Mom: It costs money, every moon, what if you fail and, and...
Me: Then the failure will be mine.
Mom: I'm better off waiting for Joe. He knows it. He'll show me.
Me: Yeah okay so you wait for Joe and I'm casting a simple Reveal The Spell on the nearest Runestone, alright?
Mom: But what if you—
Me: ...fail? Yeah, okay. This rock here says that Reading The Magic Rune Of Myths costs you 20 gold coins every month and it needs only a drop of your blood for a starting contract.
Mom: Is that legit? Can we trust this rock?
Me: You betcha. I know for a fact that Joe learned it exactly the same way as I did: by casting the Reveal The Spell on the nearest rock. It's been so popular lately, you said, so this rock just had to know the stuff, right?
Mom: I'm not sure...
Me: So I will use my blood and my coins now and if you, wait, when you feel it's legit, you'll simply give me those coins back, okay?
Mom: ...okay? But Joe...
Me: It's done. Now The Magic Rune Of Myths is yours, you can read any myth from The Library Of Myths for a month.
Mom: ...is that it?
Me: Just check it on... Well, just cast a spell somewhere. Here.
Mom: It... Works! Wow! It works!
Me: Yeah. How do you feel about the whole waiting for Joe now?
Mom: ...yeah but he knows the Rune, he would help me... He said he would!
Me: You don't need, you shouldn't need other people to show you what you can read on any carved rock by yourself with a Reveal The Spell. It's idiotic. You're smarter than that.
Mom: Yeah but I don't know it... What if I—
Me: Okay just shut up, alright? Next time ask me. I will cast your stupid basic spells for you if you're not sure you can handle a basic blood and gold contract.
Mom: Thank youuu!
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1327-1 · 2 years
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shallots are everything . i would take shallots over anything
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zestyderg · 1 year
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Your corrupted au intrigues me. Would it be okay to ask about the individual reactions of the heroes and commanders after Joe decided they couldn’t leave? I imagine for Dino, Dina, Todd and the three commanders it’d hit especially hard since they got to see Joe’s better side before Zongazonga took over his body.
Oh yeah, they were hit the hardest. They feel betrayed, really, and their vivos being taken away upsets them immensely. They're all worried about the staff leaders too (and scatterly too, but he hasn't angered Joe yet).
Dina is angry. Joe is stripping everyone of their freedom and he wants to harm anyone who tries to help them. She yells at him over this and Joe just lightly scolds her and tells her that he is doing his best to keep them SAFE. His anger towards everyone makes her more nervous to be around him but his behavior frustrates her more than anything. She picks up on the fact that maybe however this isn't voluntary on Joe's end. His eyes look VERY similar to the way Todd's eyes looked when ZZ put him under his spell and Dina wonders if something similar is happening here. Zz is dead, but those purple eyes and the way he's acting... she can't stop thinking about it.
Dino is very confused and frightened by Joe's sudden change. More visibly shaken up than his twin sister but he pushes his fears aside to try and help everyone remain optimistic that they can fix whatever is going on. Dina tells him about her suspicions regarding the true nature of Joe's condition and Dino can't help but agree. He just hopes that they all find a way to stop Joe before he truly harms someone.
Todd had begun to stop idolizing Joe as this larger than life figure and recognize him more as the flawed person he is. What he's doing now however, is SO out of pocket and he's likely cried or threw up (or both) thinking about Joe successfully killing off Terry, Stella, and Kent. The Joe he knows would NEVER DO THAT! The Joe he knows TRUSTS his staff leaders! Still, Todd feels guilty for running away from Joe.
Lester, Lola, and Cole have spent the most time around the real Joe. They've seen the worst of him as Don Boneyard and that hadn't dissuaded them from forgiving him and staying with him after he got his body back. But even then they see how he's acting and how it IS worse than what they experienced before. Joe is genuinely homicidal and possessive in a way he had never been before. When he says that the staff leaders must die, they know he means it. They don't have the slightest clue of why Joe is acting weird and it's making them anxious. They don't wanna give up on Joe and leave him, and they hate having to run from him (although they're used to running), but they figure they don't have much of a choice.
Pauleen and Rupert are just as scared and angry as everyone else. Pauleen is more openly emotional while Rupert tries to remain calm and logical (his wide eyes and silence once it's made clear Joe won't listen give away his terror though). They just haven't spent enough time around Joe to really make this feel like the gut punch it is to the others. Still sucks bad though.
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whumpcereal · 2 years
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Everyone in my ask box: I see you. Ivan in captivity. It's coming. Just...I need less snot in my brain first.
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medicinemane · 7 months
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Final thought, the cut off for any welfare program at minimum needs to be 150% of the poverty line (ie, the poverty like is $10 the cut off should be no lower than $15)
Cause the poverty line, one assumes, is the bare minimum we're saying everyone should be at, and surely welfare programs are supposed to be meant to help people below that
If you cut it off right at the line, then people aren't going to be able to get out of poverty, because any time they get close they're suddenly going to be on the hook for like $1000 or more between the various welfare they might be on, and honestly only a fool would push past that if pushing past it means falling back down again
150% at least means that they've got a chance that maybe now they're picking up the slack of all the stuff they're losing
#and listen you can say you don't trust the government with this shit and frankly neither do I#...but clearly we need something; and clearly private charity isn't able to rise to the level to deal with it#so I'd rather in one way or another reform things so it works#like listen... you get private charity taking care of this; I'll be glad to have been wrong#but you can't just be like 'well; if we had no taxes'; well that's not gonna happen; you gotta work within reality#if everyone behaved perfectly and was never corrupt that would be a great solution too; but that's not the world#anarchy will always devolve into a government; governments will always take taxes... rather work in the system we have than post collapse#so if you have another solution; I'm all for it... but it has to be systemic and self enforcing#(as in; laws must be written where a random judge can't twist it to do something heinous)#(the author of a bill won't always be in the room; you need to close loopholes so it has to be enforced how it's meant to be enforced)#in the end it's like this... the government is fucking awful; but some things require a big pot of money#this is exactly how insurance works too; get a big pot of money and pay out from that pot when 1 of the 1000 people has something go wrong#anyway... infrastructure; military; healthcare... these are all things that need a big pot of money#they have so many working parts that require consistent inputs that it doesn't work to just hope Joe Everyman comes in to buy $5 of road#eh... why bother talking? not like I'm gonna change any minds
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blkkizzat · 25 days
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YAKUZA!TOJI X MILF!READER —aka toji on some joe goldberg bullshit
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⟢ rating: mdni.18+ each episode will have its own ratings but general warnings— lactation kink, face riding, drugs (weed, alcohol, cigs), infidelity, yuji is sukuna x reader child, size-kink, milf kink, breeding kink, voyeurism, masturbation, dubcon/noncon, squirting, pussy talk, biting, creampies, obsessive tendencies, heavy manipulation, yandere, Toji in daddy and dad mode. this will be fem black reader coded as reader is foreigner and uses some aave but no other descriptors. ⟢ total run time: 𝟏𝟑.𝟒𝐤 of ? ⟢ opening theme: Rich Baby Daddy - Drake
⟢ subscriber access: tag request in comments, previous tag list from the teasers are already accounted for. ⟢ director's note: this fic is to celebrate my year of having this account! literally this is the first fic i thought of and wanted to write and have been working on it since nov'23. so full circle moment fr! i hope you enjoy it. ⟢ executive producers: special thanks to @littlemochabunni, @ryomens-vixen, @yung-notorious and @buttercupblu143 for helping me beta this and bounce off ideas and listen to me be crazy for the past 9-10 months about this fic 🥹.
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꒰ disclaimer: this is a plot-driven eventual smut fic and is told mostly in Toji POV through flashbacks until the end of episode 3. so if you stick with me i promise you a freak nasty pay off in episode 4 💕🤭. the build up makes it 100x better, trust~ ꒱
🎬 𝐄𝐏𝐈𝐒𝐎𝐃𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓—
🎞️ 𝐒𝟏 𝐄𝟏: ❝ I STILL GOT SOME LOVE DEEP INSIDE OF ME, PLEASE DRAG IT OUT OF ME ❞
⟢ Reflecting on the last 3 months of meeting you during a time of organizational unrest, how did casual desire turn into a sinister obsession for a deadly yakuza assassin like Toji Fushiguro? It's your fault though, as a new resident of the yakuza luxury high-rise, The Nursery—shoulda known better than to have smiled that brightly at a single-dad widower, mamas. episode run time: ��.𝟕𝐤
🎞 ️𝐒𝟏 𝐄𝟐: ❝ POPPIN' MY SHIT COME WITH CONSEQUENCES, POST NUT CLARITY I CAME TO MY SENSES ❞
⟢ With tensions in the organization at an all-time high and a traitor still on the loose, everyone is on edge. Fortunately, Toji has been watching over you for weeks, especially since Sukuna has been even less attentive. But when Toji notices you making a new friend—a potential lifeline apart from him—can he keep his jealousy in check? Just how far will Toji go to have you all to himself? episode run time: 𝟖.𝟕𝐤
🎞 ️𝐒𝟏 𝐄𝟑: ❝ WE FROM TWO DIFFERENT WORLDS BUT IT'S A MATCH TO ME ❞
⟢ Forced to make difficult choices this past week, it's becoming increasingly clear Sukuna's loyalties lie more with the organization than you. But of course, as chance would have it, Toji is there to console you when you have no one. Who needs Sukuna, friends, or anyone else when you have Toji? Toji can see the cracks forming in your resolve—but when he pushes, will you still be able to resist his charms? Or will you crumble in his hands? episode run time: ⩇⩇:⩇⩇
🎞️ 𝐒𝟏 𝐄𝟒: ❝ JUST SAY GOODBYE TO HIM, THEN TAKE THE RIDE TO ME, RIDE TO ME ❞
⟢ Circumstances align and you're practically served on a platter to Toji, he takes this as the prime opportunity to finally claim you as his. Toji deserves you. You know this though, so he won't have to do a thing—you'll come to him all on your own like a good sexy lil' milf won't you, mamas? Nevermind about your world falling apart around you—Toji has already made all of the arrangements to see that you and Yuji are taken care of. episode run time: ⩇⩇:⩇⩇
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🎬 𝐁𝐎𝐍𝐔𝐒 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓—
🎞️ 𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋 𝐒𝟎 𝐄𝟏: ❝ WANNA STICK AROUND FOR THE RIDE? BABY HOLD ON TIGHT ❞ AKA "DON'T DROP THE PANCAKES"
Prequel/Standalone. Yakuza!Sukuna x Exchange Student!Reader. ⟢ Moving to a foreign country for school ain't all sunshine and rainbows—especially when your student status prevents you from acquiring legitimate employment. Good thing a friend of a friend has a connect for under-the-table work. Although, being a topless maid for a ruthless yakuza leader wasn't on your bingo card for your new life abroad—especially when you end up pregnant. episode run time: ⩇⩇:⩇⩇
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©𝐛𝐥𝐤𝐤𝐢𝐳𝐳𝐚𝐭 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒. 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬 𝐨𝐫 𝐠𝐟𝐱, 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞.
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List of words for the computer:
LONG POST- more under the cut
STANFORD- Pulls up a file on Stanford Pines, written by an unknown scientist. It discusses his extra finger and praises his intelligence, as well as calling him the “next evolution in the human species”.
BILL CIPHER- Takes you to the Wikipedia page for the Eye of Providence. Also took me to a Sesame Street video about a Jazzy Triangle and a Square. Not sure what prompted the change.
STANLEY PINES: Takes you to a list of EBay listings for brass knuckles.
FIDDLEFORD: Takes you to the music video for Cotton Eye Joe by Rednex.
SHERMIE: Nothing. I sure do wish we got some lore about Grandpa Pines.
GRAVITY FALLS: The text on the computer reads “never heard of it” and the red light on the bottom turns green.
ALEX HIRSCH: Leads to Google Images for “flannel”. Huh.
WEIRDMAGEDDON: Pulls up an article from the Gravity Falls Gossiper about how nothing happened at all and there was no apocalypse.
DISNEY: Screen reads “rat.gif censored for your protection”
SOOS: Leads to a page of writing from Soos himself, referencing many things (including Tad Strange being gay and madly in love with Woodpecker Guy. Love wins!!!)
DIPPER: Leads to a creepy yellow parchment with a message from Bill Cipher himself trying to trick Dipper into blinding himself by staring at the sun for 13 hours straight! Silly! (Also if you keep clicking on it, the page gets darker and blurrier until it implies we've gone blind)
MABEL: Causes stickers to appear on every available surface. Clicking it enough times leads to message “lab now fully Mabelized”.
WENDY: Leads to a note from Wendy that mentions a way to ward off evil triangles written in the bottom corner of the book.
GIDEON: Makes a web recording of Gideon scatting play. It ends with “I love you forever Mabel”. Please shut the fuck up you little creep.
TAD STRANGE: Plays a video of bread with smooth jazz in the background.
TOBY DETERMINED: Leads to a Google search for a restraining order. Holyyyyy shittttttt
WHO ARE YOU: “I could ask you the same question”
SEASON 3: “Season Two”. I guess that’s that lol
This was about all I could find. Please reblog with anything else you can discover! Thank you, fellow Gravity Falls enjoyers!
And make sure to give some love to all the wonderful folks down in the comments! Many of these answers and tips come from what they've found. I can't list everyone, unfortunately- I didn't expect this post to get popular- but, to everyone who's helped out, THANK YOU.
FURTHER EDITS:
BLIND EYE: Pulls up an optometrist’s eye exam. Each line reads “WKHBOOVHH”. Too lazy to translate atm.
PIÑATA: Bill Cipher getting beaten to death /hj
MASON: A note from Dipper listing several anagrams of Gravity Falls characters’ names. You can check in the comments for the answers.
AXOLOTL: “You ask alotl questions”. Thanks for the pun, Alex, but I’m kind of losing my mind rn
MYSTERY SHACK: Leads to a Google search for Confusion Hill, the real-life Mystery Shack!
MYSTERY: “?”
MONSTER: Leads to several YouTube videos for “There’s a Monster at the End of this Book.”
VALLIS CINERIS: Leads to an analog-horror-esque video of Baby Bill and his parents, who have been blotted out by static, and a voice repeating “WHY DID YOU DO IT” over and over again until you stop the video.
PORTAL: “Portal.exe has been deleted. I bet you could build a new one.”
GIFFANY: You need to put it in multiple times. Several warnings about breaching firewall, followed by a message from GIFFANY saying “SOOS! I still love you!” or smth like that, and then GIFFANY herself briefly appearing onscreen. Trying again after that summons her more. Also lets you download some ZIP files.
DORITO: Summons an image of a spinning Dorito, followed by the most cursed image of Bill Cipher I have ever seen.
GOD: A short video of an axolotl in a tank with a Bill Cipher statue plays. This is Alex’s axolotl, shown in the Book of Bill countdown.
REALITY: “Is an illusion”
FILBRICK: “I’m not impressed”
CARYN: “I knew you were gonna write that”
GLASS SHARD BEACH: Leads to an image of the New Jersey Hell Hole.
ANY CUSS WORD: Pulls up a paper reading “NOT S&P APPROVED. WASH YOUR MOUTH OUT WITH SOAP” with an image of soap below.
MATPAT: Leads to a video of MatPat next to a conspiracy board, holding the Book of Bill. He tells us we’re on our own.
BABBA: Plays an audio recording of Dipper singing BABBA. Not Disco Girl, a different song.
CRAZ: Leads to the Jem and the Holograms theme.
XYLER: See above.
AD ASTRA PER ASPERA: Shows us two new journal pages from Ford and Mabel, studying the Cipher statue. They’re definitely worth the read, I teared up looking at them.
ANSWER: “Question”
QUESTION: “Answer”
SEASON ONE: “Season -1: Antigravity Falls”
SEASON TWO: “Season 1” …maybe scratch what I said about Season 3. Or don’t. Things are starting to damage my brain.
CURSED (got from @slimslamflimflam decoding the candle! Thanks!): Shows two pages talking about the dangers of drawing triangles, with the bottom of the second page showing several drawings of Bill and the words “HE IS COMING, RUN”
THE UNIVERSE: “Hologram”
RIZZ: “Life privileges revoked. Now releasing poison gas.” This response is repeated if you type in SKIBIDI or FORTNITE.
BABY: Shows an ultrasound of a fetus Bill Cipher, captioned “Look at what’s growing inside you! See you in nine months, papa!”
JOURNAL 3: “The Journal for Me”
PACIFICA: Leads to a note from Pacifica calling Bill Cipher “ick” and telling us to follow her on social media under “Platinum Paz”
PLATINUM PAZ: Pulls up an image of Northwest Manor with the llama symbol overlaid and a “NW” logo beneath. There's also a short story beneath!
LOVE: Leads to an audiobook of “The Love Triangle”. Need to read later.
BLENDIN: “The time agent lost and presumed incompetent”. Uh…?
SCARY: Leads to another audiobook of a cheesy Goosebumps-esque horror novel written by Bill himself, apparently.
DIVORCE: Shows you the logo of the bar Bill went to after his fight with Ford… Billford bitter exes confirmed
ROBBIE: Leads to the cringiest messages ever. He’s such a failure I love him
CONSPIRACY: Leads to a video of a man losing his mind over the countdown counting up. I feel so seen. (I have been informed that his name is Charlie Day, he's an actor from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia and that one meme, he had a quote on the back of the Book of Bill, thanks to everyone who explained that to me, I'm sorry, I'm uncultured)
RAT: “Thurburt’s number?”
BLANCHIN: Leads to a YouTube video on how to blanch vegetables.
TJ ECKLEBURG: “Never mention that name again.”
NOTHING: “Something”
SOMETHING: “Nothing”
BURNSIDE: “Burned inside.” Well… at least we know what happened…
WADDLES: Leads to the pig placement network!
THERAPRISM: Pulls up a sign from the theraprism regarding an emergency situation. The code reads "THE OLD ONE".
SHAPE: Pulls up an article on Plato, triangles, and Ancient Greece. This article is presumably written by Bill.
LLIB and BILL: THIS leads to the Sesame Street video every time.
WEIRD: Shows a video of a frightened Weird Al panicking about being trapped in a computer. Sorry, man...
CLONE: Pulls up an image of Paper Jam Dipper, a warning about not getting him too close to liquids, and an option to print.
TRIANGLE: ")" or "Tri harder."
THEYLLSEE: "Is seeing believing?"
DEER TEETH: "For you, kid!"
LIFE: "Life: 72% complete. Now loading: death."
DEATH: "Life's goth cousin."
PINES: "A good family tree."
OWL TROWEL: A slab of hieroglyphs, translating to an ancient ad for an owl trowel.
SCALENE: "Life form not found." EUCLID has the same outcome.
WELL WELL WELL BEING: Some assorted notes from Bill's Theraprism file. These include his greatest love and fear, his art therapy notes, and notes on his phobias. Three clicks is required to read them all.
BOO BERRY: Offers a poem on the meaning of life! Wow! I feel so enlightened!
LOVE YA BRO: Shows us a doodle from Stan of one of his and Ford's Sea Grunks adventures, and another code on the back. It translates to "Kings of New Jersey." I've been told it lets you download the code as a font.
SORRY: Reveals the repaired Backupsmore photo, with a note from Fiddleford about his and Ford's growing friendship. Fiddauthor fans, we are eating well tonight!
HORROR: Pulls up an image and report on The Always Garden, which is essentially a cheap Italian restaurant hidden in the backrooms.
HOLOGRAM: "Universe."
NAITSUAF: Pulls up a page that looks like it would be from the Book of Bill, in which Bill tries to convince us to sell us his soul. Clicking "ARE YOU READY?" pulls up a contract where we can sell our soul to Bill (with an alarming amount of coded fine print. Will need to translate later). You can print this document out, back out, or sign it right there on the web. Hitting "SIGN" causes the words "PLEASURE DOING BUSINESS WITH YOU!" to appear, and the document to close. In other words, I no longer have a soul.
IMSTILLONYOURMIND: Plays a recording of the ocean, with Stan faintly talking in the background. Poor Ford ain't quite over the divorce yet...
HOTXOLOTL: Pulls up a "MOST WANTED" doc on the henchmaniacs.
SEVENEYES: Pulls up a faded polaroid of The Oracle with text on the back that reads "LEAVE HIM. Escape to dimension *blurred out*. It's against the rules but it's the only reality where you'll be safe from him." The code at the bottom (once again decoded by the powerhouse that is @slimslamflimflam) reads "Set a course for Dimension: R34LITY." Is another Cipher Hunt in the makes? Only time will tell, hehehe.
JUST FIT IN: Plays an old commercial with a few moments of speech in the glitches at the end.
EVEN HIS LIES ARE LIES: Shows a transcript from a therapy session at the Theraprism. Bill discusses his relationship with Ford and cuts off the session when someone brings up his parents.
NOT A PHASE: Shows a Google search for "black hair dye stained an entire bathroom."
PAPER IS BOOK SKIN: Instantly downloads a page of fleshy pink paper with the word "ENJOY" written on it!
SHAVE YOUR GRANDMA: Pulls up a few more pages about the human life cycle.
LIES: Pulls up an image of "The Game of Lies" board game, with a long stretch of text from (I assume) Bill, ending with "LIE UNTIL YOU ARE NOT LYING ANYMORE." Someone has some issues...
SAY BAAAA: Pulls up a neat little rhyme about being Bill Cipher's obedient flock of sheep. The code at the end translates to "Black Sheep."
ONE EYED KING: Plays a video of a hypnotist's spiral, with Bill proclaiming "YOU WANT TO PLEDGE YOUR SOUL TO BILL CIPHER" in the background. There is also morse code that translates to "NAITSUAF", leading to a previous discovery- the soul contract.
TANTRUM: Pulls up a transcript of a spat between Bill and Time Baby.
TITANS BLOOD: "HOOT HOOT! Password please!"
CURSE WITTEBANE: Pulls up an image of a Bill Cipher ouija board.
FORDTRAMARINE: Pulls up several rejected files from Ford trying to convince us Fordtramarine exists.
SUCK IT MERLIN: Pulls up a tapestry of Bill riding a unicorn. The code at the top reads "DAY MARE VS NIGHTMARE."
HEY NERD: Plays a commercial advertising things such as a Bill Cipher calendar, the Scrubba-Bill, a severed hand, and the entire Cygnus-XIII galaxy. Half of the image can be found in the Book of Bill.
DESTRUCTION IS THE FORM OF CREATION: Pulls up a frantic page of notes from post-portal-shit Fiddleford. A sticky note at the bottom has a code that reads "Unreality."
RUBBERHOSE: Plays "The World is Small Ever After for All."
IRREGULAR: Shows us Bill's mugshot in color. The code below reads "No prison or attention span can hold him."
UNREALITY: Offers a guide by Bill on how to become immortal.
GUN: "Oh yes oh yes oh yes they both."
ABUELITA: Leads to a video on vacuuming the walls.
YES: "What's McGucket's favorite soda?"
NO: "Your loss..."
REPEATEDLY CLICKING STAN: This stuff deserves a section of its own, away from the OG Stan stuff. It takes you through several Ebay listings on various Stan-ish items until you get to a page written by Bill about Stan's secret shames. "Ex-wives" further confirms our theory on Stan and Eda's relationship, as well as revealing many other bits of lore. "Fears" is somewhat goofy to be honest. "Secret Shames" reveals that Stan is a fanfiction writer and that his mother is the only member of his family who truly loves him outside of Ford and the kids. "Unreported Crimes" is somewhat goofy as well. "Failed Products" basically confirms that Stan is that world's Alex. "Lowest Moments" is genuinely depressing, and "Darkest Thought". Well. I'm not spoiling it lol. And the bit on "How He Beat Me" causes Bill to get more and more frantic/angry the more you click it! Comedy GOLD!
DIPPY FRESH: Leads to a Reddit post of the Burger King Kids Club.
MEOW: Leads to a TikTok of a man playing the Gravity Falls theme on that cap keyboard.
HELP ME: Pulls up another video of Alex's axolotl and the tiny statue. Rip Bill ig :/
R34LITY: Pulls up several photos of the henchmaniacs in live-action, captioned "They found a new home."
JOURNAL 1: "The journal of fun."
JOURNAL 2: "The journal for you."
FBI: "Your webcam is on. We are watching."
BURNED INSIDE: Shows an image of a charred Oregon Parks badge and nametag on the ground.
HECTORING: Plays a silly little country song!
OROBOROUS: Pulls up two journal pages about Fiddleford buying Ford an axolotl to keep him company, and Bill subsequently telling Ford to get rid of him. There's also some code on the first page that reads "CHONKY BOY." Ford, you wonderful dork.
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lostandbackagain · 1 year
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I always go into these shows ready to be annoying as hell about noelle after and I still plan to be but fitz always fucking gets me when I don't expect it
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qqueenofhades · 2 months
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oh god is biden dropping out? i don't know what happens then
Jesus effing Christ.
Few thoughts:
The billionaire Democratic donors got their way, apparently. All I saw was that the big-dollar donors were secretly putting pressure on the rank-and-file Democratic elected officials (i.e. House and Senate) to denounce Biden or not get any more money, and other shameful backroom maneuvering to knife Biden. I will refrain (lol, no I won't) from speculating that billionaires of any political stripe feel threatened by Biden's increasingly progressive tax/wealth redistribution policies, and saw their chance after the bad debate performance to knife him. Because until further notice, I'm going to think that was the biggest factor.
I don't know if there's an actual health condition that made Biden agree it was the best time (in fucking July) to step down, but if this was an issue, there needed to be planning last year, at the earliest, to prepare for a new successor. I don't know what's going on. This is a clusterfuck on many, many levels.
However: it is true that this does change things and not necessarily only for the worse, as long as Harris is immediately confirmed as the new nominee and this stupid Democrats In Disarray nonsense, which is giving the media exactly what they want, is put to a fucking end. If Harris is also swept aside and the billionaire donors try to install their preferred "Centrist!!!" candidate (lol Manchin or some shit) with an equally antidemocratic closed-door Star Chamber convention, then yes, we're fucked. Because the Congressional Black Caucus and African American voters saw exactly what the rich white man billionaires were trying to do by torching Biden and then Harris, and they are not going to play ball with some Magical White Man replacement.
If Harris is immediately confirmed as the new nominee (and to the best of my knowledge Biden has endorsed her), then she has a chance of reinvigorating the race. There were a lot of Americans who did not want either Biden or Trump. I suspect they were fucking braindead, but so be it. Harris has apparently polled pretty and increasingly well in recent days (in some cases actually better than Biden) and again, there is no remotely small-d democratic alternative to her. The billionaire donors already trashed the duly elected (by the primary process) Democratic nominee. If they do the same to Harris, then yes. We will have Trump and there won't be any more democracy in this country on either side, because the Republican big-bucks donors will gleefully pick up where the Democratic big-bucks donors left off.
Jesus fucking Christ.
The message needs to be "Harris is Joe's successor, she is younger and already has four years of experience and is the only candidate." Anything else is a fucking gift from god to the Republicans, once more getting trashed after Trump's terrible RNC speech. Maybe she can then pick Whitmer or Shapiro (both popular and effective Democratic governors of swing states, MI and PA respectively) as a running mate, but the nominee has to be Kamala. There is no other fucking choice. This is already enough of a mess.
If that can happen, and the fucking donors can refrain from fucking it up, then... okay. It's not great, but it does change things. It makes the ticket younger. It makes it historic (first Black female president beating Trump would be amazing). It could reach people disenchanted with the current two-old-white-guys setup.
This is an incredible sacrifice on Biden's part and I only wish that I could believe he did it voluntarily, rather than being forced out by a small class of rich people worrying about his policies getting too progressive.
I wish him only the best and I recognize this decision was taken under extreme pressure. If we then lose to Trump, I hope everyone who forced Biden out burns in hell.
I was a diehard Biden supporter not because I loved the guy personally, but because he was the only choice for preserving democracy in America. The essential stakes of the election have not changed, even if the billionaires just knifed us in the fucking back, possibly to nobody's surprise, because R or D, they are not our friends.
Kamala is the only choice. I will now have to defend her as hard as I did for Biden. She needs to beat Trump. There is nothing else to it. If you think she can't, then you need to work at helping her do that. There is already enough calamity and doom. We do not have a choice. We cannot lose sight of what is at stake here.
Kamala Harris/Whitmer and/or Shapiro and/or Buttigieg 2024.
The end.
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maxlarens · 4 months
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CL: guess the heat drives people crazy
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pairing(s): charles leclerc x artist!reader
summary: you’re not used to having a boyfriend, let alone having a famous one. though you’d like to think you’re taking your new found status as a wag in your stride. charles certainly thinks so. [smau] [part 2 to this fic]
fc: faceless and some alexandra saint mleux
a/n: sorry this took so long! i was honestly kinda unsure how i wanted to do this. i wasn’t sure if i wanted to do a little storyline but i basically ended up just doing a bunch of little snapshots of their relationship 😇
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@ynusername just posted…
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liked by @rowan, @charlesleclerc and others
ynusername wildflowers, the waves where we met, on the way to our first dinner
chloegarelli i did that!☝🏻☝🏻
⤷ ynusername okay 😐 dont get too big for ur britches
user1 is that……..?
⤷ user2 CHARLES RIGHT?
⤷ user1 yes wtf!?
⤷ user3 you are delusional you can only see his hands
⤷ user2 AND?? he is in her likes
rowan we did it joe‼️
⤷ chloegarelli four years in the making iktr
⤷ chloegarelli i’d like to thank the american people and i’d like to thank democracy for this win
⤷ ynusername we are MONEGASQUE?
⤷ ynusername anyway u guys are the most insane couple i have ever met
⤷ rowan and you’re stuck with us foreverrrr
user4 no one is talking about how adorable this is. the waves where we met like UR KIDDING!
⤷ user5 if she is actually dating charles then he is literally the luckiest man alive
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@f1wagupdates just posted…
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tagged @ynusername @charlesleclerc
liked by @chloegarelli, @ynusername and others
f1wagupdates ‼️🚨 new wag alert 🚨‼️ monegasque painter yn yln has been spotted getting cozy with charles on his yacht. it’s believed they met while on holiday in italy several months ago🥺
user1 fell to my knees in the grocery store
⤷ user1 THAT SHOULD BE ME
⤷ user1 but if it had to be anyone else im glad its her
user2 oh i KNEW that was him on her instagram three months ago. vindication.
user3 stop she is so pretty
⤷ user4 like attracts like
rowan cats out of the bag @chloegarelli
⤷ chloegarelli WE DID THIS EVERYONE SAY THANK YOU
⤷ user5 thank you oh my god
⤷ user6 THANK YOU
⤷ charlesleclerc thank you😁
[❤️ by f1wagupdates]
user7 need to see them together at a race
⤷ user8 CHARLES GET HER ON THE PADDOCK
⤷ charlesleclerc 🫡
ynusername oh my god. not the picture of him pushing me into the water😐
⤷ user9 OH i love her ur honour
⤷ f1wagupdates I’M SORRY!
⤷ rowan don’t apologise its so perfect
⤷ charlesleclerc Stop I tripped!!!!!!!!! I told you!!!!!
⤷ ynusername u did NOT trip!!!!
⤷ user10 they are my everything wtf
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@ynusername just posted…
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tagged @charlesleclerc
liked by @charlesleclerc @f1 @scuderiaferrari and others
ynusername charles, the week we met we talked about what the monaco gp meant to you. the place your dreams took root, the one race you wanted so badly it hurt, the city you wanted to love you back. i could feel your yearning for that win as deeply as i feel for my own ambitions. i knew then that we understood each other like i have never understood anyone else in my life. and i knew, somehow i knew, that you would be on the top step of that podium. charles, i am endlessly proud of you and all the hard work you did to get here. you deserve this. i love you. and monaco loves you.
user1 charles monaco gp win you are everything to me
user2 they’re in love in love!!! WTFFFF
scuderiaferrari ❤️
user3 god let me have what they have i cant handle this
chloegarelli im tearing up yall are like my babies
user4 HE DID IT!!!!
charlesleclerc oh I love you I love you I love you
⤷ charlesleclerc How would I have done this without you?
⤷ ynusername I am so proud of you baby. I love you ❤️
⤷ user5 this interaction changed lives
⤷ user6 how do i reasonably find love after this. how am i supposed to be satisfied with anything less???
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🎨 i just KNOW her caption would make the rounds on tumblr
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