#explodes like minecraft tnt

[errorhalo]

day 3 cringetober !! unnecessarily complex fit ! I don't know if this is considered complex?.. but I did spend a lot of time on it so i'm gonna say it counts :P Sun in a dress, a sun dress if you will /hj

[joifee]

Here are both my pieces for the @bdubszine !!!!! Such a great opportunity to run with it and just have fun with detail work.

I am in love with sungod bdubs and very proud of this piece with the improv class^^

Down below is some in depth talk for the first piece with bdubs and all his clocks :D

The one on his chest is a regular minecraft clock - he always carries one in his offhand. In the background his his big tower from his "building with bdubs" series. He is wearing his moss cloak. On his wirst: A clock with a horse: he loves horses. also it actually is inspired by the horse-mountain he build in season 9 of hermitcraft A purple clock with ears: a purple panda clock. He joined one mcc (minecraft championship) and one it first try on the team called purple pandas) A tnt block-clock: Season 7 of hermitcraft he had, alongside impulse and tango, a company called "the boomers" who would explode stuff with tnt for diamonds - bdubs stick was he would die in every blow up they do (there are compilations)

in his jacket: The clock looking like a ring: reference to double life. He was soul-bonded to impulse and they lowkey roleplayed as a married couple and impulse gifted him a clock as a sign or marriage. therefore it looks like a ring. it also has "i" pointers because impulse always puts "i"s on his stuff A regular alarm clock: Basically that - maybe a reference for him always sleeping through the night. The red glasses clock: reference to season 8. He, tango and keralis based together and called themself "big eyes crew" and they all wore red glasses Emerald shaped clock: season 9 as the right hand to king rendog (theres also a crown inside the shape) emeralds because rendog and bdubs wanted to change currency to royal emeralds which started a war on the server and led to rendogs execution. bdubs stayed loyal till the end "hep" clock: Season 7. He plays right hand man to mayor scar. There was a turfwar between two groups - one wanted their main island to be mycelium the other wanted it to be grass. HEP was the group who wanted grassblocks so its a grassblocked shaped clock. they lost the war clock with a snake: 3rd life reference. Inside the clock theres a castle "the crastle" which was his and cleos base in 3rd life. The snake stands for cleo. the heart is part of the logo for the traffic series (same btw count for the heart in the impulse ring) sundial: reference to the hermitcraftxempires smp crossover. bdubs came to empires smp and announced himself as "the sungod" and basically became a god and gem, oli, fwhip and sausage were his followers for the short time. the shape is after a build sausage made in his name the "B" sign: reference to last life. He was part of team B.E.S.T. and they had shields with their initials aka Bdubs, Etho, Skizzlman and Tango. The four hearts are the lifes he was given at the start of the series half tnt clock: reference to ethoslab who is his best friend on hermitcraft and they are just unnormal about each other messed up steam punk clock: reference to the create series he did with keralis, tango, scar and zedaph who unfortunatly was short lived mcc coin: the coin he got for winning mcc broken heart monitor clock: limited life. there's a heart monitor and digital clock. the clock is broken because bdubs didnt uploaded his view for limited life (at the time of drawing this piece) so we never new how much time he had left (we know now) small pocket watch with snake and wings: also limited life. he teamed up with scar (the wings) and cleo (the snake) tree clock: the tree of whimsey. one of his first builds of season 9. he crowned tango as parkour king, cub as royal magican/dragonslayer and ren as king under it

rest of the smaller clocks are filler

[anonymous-dentist]

Hi, I’m A.D., I’m a historian, and let’s talk about the nuclear bomb and why the one that exploded at the end of QSMP’s Purgatory Event probably didn’t kill all that many people upon initially exploding.

The nuclear bomb, as everybody knows, has only ever been used in a war twice. Both explosions were caused by the United States in their war against Japan at the tail end of World War Two in one final terrible last ditch attempt at ending the war through any means necessary.

Pictured above are the atomic explosions at Hiroshima (left) and Nagasaki (right.)

These are big huge clouds, which makes sense! Nuclear weapons, on average, have the strength of somewhere between 10 and 50 megatons of TNT. Hydrogen bombs, meanwhile, are WAY worse, with the first test coming in at a whopping 10 MILLION tons of TNT.

To put it in Minecraft terms for all you nerds out there, imagine Doomsday from the Dream SMP and how it razed an entire nation to bedrock level by using somewhere in the range of 20 stacks of TnT (if I’m remembering correctly.) A nuclear bomb, in these terms, would have blown L’Manberg up something like eight times over and then some.

So that’s. Bad. Right?

Well, here’s the QSMP’s bomb as was constructed by our favorite depressed detective, q!Maximus:

This bomb, notably, is underground. It was never dug up, it was just moved somewhere else. It isn’t above ground, and it never left this room. Watch the cutscene back (linked here), the bomb never left the room.

So this is where underground nuclear testing comes in.

Underground testing began in 1951, and it remains the only form of scientific nuclear testing not banned by the Limited Test Ban Treaty of 1963.

No big surprise, a lot of early underground tests were conducted by the US out in Nevada, where they kinda tested nukes legit fucking EVERYWHERE in the desert for a long time. Below are some photos, just for funsies:

What’s important about underground nuclear explosions is that they actually end up releasing less radiation into the atmosphere than regular nukes do. What happens beyond that depends on whether or not the radiation remains contained.

A contained explosion’s aftermath:

And an uncontained explosion’s aftermath:

There hasn’t really been many negative biological effects reported from these underground tests, which is really saying something considering how close to nuclear blasts the US had its guys at most of the time (see below)

The worst you got out of the underground tests was some radioactivity in cows’ milk, which is NOTHING compared to the effects of the above-ground nuclear testing at the Nevada Site:

So… what does this mean for the QSMP?

Well, if we’re going off of historical and scientific precedent, legitimately nothing substantial happened to the islands of Purgatory. There’s more of a risk of dying from the pre-established radioactive rain disaster effects as well as the earthquake and meteor disasters.

Fun fact! Underground nuclear explosions usually registered as weaker than actual fault line activity, aka actual earthquakes.

If Maxo’s nuke was dropped from above, the devastation would be greater. Nuclear fallout is no joke; even today, cancer rates in the American West are still pretty high from the above-ground testing conducted at the Nevada Site. The Bikini Atoll will never be the same after all the testing the US did there, either.

But, because this nuke seemed to have gone off underground, I can safely assume that the damage done to the islands above was minimal at worst. Maybe there’s a radioactivity leak, but everybody staying on the islands had already experienced radiation up to that point.

It’s important to remember this because several characters did stay behind on the islands, and the fandom is assuming them dead because, well. A nuke went off. But those characters aren’t dead yet (outside of q!Maxo, who was possibly directly above the nuke when it went off and thus would’ve been hit full-force by the explosion.) Many were on the beach, far from the the nuke. They’re fine, and you can prove it with history!

TLDR; the nuke from the end of Purgatory was assumedly set off underground, which would have negated a lot of its potential damage, so everybody’s fine except for the unfortunately deceased q!Maxo

[dumbponyboykinnie]

how do the outsiders play minecraft and idgaf that they live in the 60s it’s a modern au

pony builds in creative mode and spawns hundreds of animals; once the game bugged and all his animals disappeared and he cried (my younger brother reference); also makes pixel art; scared to turn on survival mode

darry used to be like a professional like he has beaten the enderdragon several times and he loved the game so much but he doesn’t have time to play anymore and he doesn’t check updates so when pony shows him the stuff he built he’s like “since when does minecraft have axolotls” (my older brother reference)

steve puts tnts on other people’s houses in coop and explodes them. especially on poor ponyboy’s houses. steve hasn’t got like a super powerful computer so it freezes all the time he does it. yells and cusses at everyone who plays with him for every little mistake they make but soda can die in lava with full netherite armor and inventory fulled with diamonds and steve won’t say a word

two-bit builds block dicks all over the game world; cant play seriously, usually just goofs around and then dies in lava and gets yelled at bc he loses all the cool stuff steve gave to him to free his own inventory, like all the diamonds and stuff; his fav animal is a sheep and he spawns hundreds of them in pony’s worlds

soda was taught how to play by darry when they were both kids but darry usually did all the work and soda just goofed around and helped him (at least he thought so; and darry loved him too much to tell him that he’s not helping) ; is too bored to do routine things like mining and stuff so he turns on creative mode and takes netherite swords and armor and then turns back to survival mode and goes to fight ender dragon and still dies and complains to everyone

johnny usually finds a village and lives there, adopts animals and names every single one, grows crops, protects the villagers and slowly develops!! he’s a good player in general; sometimes plays together with dally

dally names every dog he adopts tim and has a black cat named johnny, but he did those two things for completely opposite reasons. tries to speedrun the game but always fails and dies accidentally, then screams his lungs out cussing; sometimes plays together with johnny

when johnny and dally play together johnny just does what he usually does and dally wants to show off so when they explore some caves together he’s like “i’ll protect you” and fights with 5 zombies at once and then gets shot by a skeleton and johnny just stands there bc his super old and slow computer is frozen again

[veenus777]

Can I request a Wilbur Soot where the reader and him have been dating for like 8/9 years and in one of tommys mod videos they just spend it on a cute Minecraft date, maybe they have a fake proposal where Wilbur gives reader a diamond and it’s really cute? Feel free to go anyway you want with this!! 🫶🏼🫶🏼

-anon🦋

◜Minecraft Date◞

┊ ᝰ﹕Just Fluff and a little drama, SFW, Reader GN, English from Google translate

┊ ᝰ﹕Thank you very much for your order, it was my first and it made me very happy! I confess that I had to watch some of Tommy's videos to do it, I hope you like it <3

♤ Ever since you and Wilbur started dating a few years ago, you've made a tradition of every Friday being reserved for date nights and it's always worked out well.

♧ Until today when the restaurant called saying there was a problem with reservations which resulted in nowhere to go and that left you feeling discouraged.

♤ Tommy, knowing what happened, decides to invite them to participate in his weird Minecraft mods video.

♧ You end Wilbur up accepting and staying home for game night.

♤ Chaos is the definition of everything, Tommy running and screaming as he is being chased by some horror entity.

♧ While Philza just tries to build his house in peace while being continually hindered by Charlie.

♤ Somewhere between gathering resources and laughing at Tommy getting killed by Chucky, you get the brilliant idea to turn your date night into a Minecraft date.

♧ Wilbur immediately agrees and you look for a village to make your place and everything looks beautiful with rugs and flowers.

♤ However, the peace was short-lived, because as soon as Tommy and Cherlie found out about the idea, they made it their personal mission to destroy your date.

♧ You only turned around for three seconds before being blown to death by a TNT placed by Charlie.

♤ And a war began, on one side you and Wilbur trying to build your meeting and on the other Tommy and Charlie doing everything possible and impossible to ruin it.

♧ And in the middle we had Philza who simply gave up on all of you and went off on his own to create his own house.

♤ They exploded your venue a total of six times before you guys finally gave up and looked for another place for your date.

♧ However, it seemed that Tommy had predicted it since the choice of mod didn't help his goal at all, and every time you had any moment of peace and tranquility it ended with you both being chased by Jason or Frankenstein.

"We're that couple in horror movies that goes out to make out and ends up dying" Wilbur says as his character walks around looking for somewhere safe

"Wow, what a comforting babe" you respond ironically

♤ You decide to dig down to the badrock and build your place there, without the chance of being interrupted by your friends or any mob.

♧ Wilbur decorates the place with plants on the wall and a table in the middle, carpet and flowers everywhere.

♤ He gives you cooked meat and fish and you just sit and talk.

"I'm sorry we can't go on a real date"

"it's not your fault will, and anyway we're having our date now"

"Well but that doesn't stop me from giving you something precious and expensive" he jokes and throws some diamonds to you

"Ohh is that a propose?" You say laughing

"Yes Madam, would you like to spend the rest of your cubical life building houses and mining by my side? I promise you a huge house and all the diamonds in this game" he says in a pompous voice

"Wow it's impossible to deny it my good sir after all this is every person's dream" you respond in the same tone

♧ The conversation doesn't last long before Charlie invades the place.

"I can't believe my eyes! You betrayed me, Wilbur, with that!" Charlie arrives, hitting Will and making a big show of it. "And our children?! Our love was nothing to you?!”

♤ The fight lasted for a good few minutes resulting in the room being broken and everything being blown up, as well as one death for willbur.

♧ The recording didn't last any longer and soon Tommy finished it.

♤ And the rest of the night was just you and Will relaxing on the couch watching some cliché romantic comedy, without any kind of explosions or murderous chases.

.˚｡  💋 .˚｡ 💌

[cattimeswithjellie]

A Brief History of the Tunnel Bore War

As is the case with many ongoing storylines in Hermitcraft, especially the wars, it can be hard to keep up with what all has happened and keeps happening, especially if you don't watch many hermits. Here's a brief synopsis of the escalations and shenanigans that have led to the current point of the Tunnel Bore War (also called Prank War 2.0 or the Barnyard Brawl)

Grian, Scar, Mumbo and Doc are all neighbors on the Hermitcraft Season 9 server. Grian has a floating-rock structure called The Rock, Mumbo builds The Vault, Scar builds a whole amusement park called Scarland, and Doc uses a world-eater to create a massive hole to bedrock called The Perimeter. Other Hermits are also nearby, but they are less involved in current events.

Grian and Scar make themselves pesky to Doc throughout the early part of the season, mostly small but irritating things like stealing copper from the walls of the Perimeter and using the bedrock floor to spawn mobs that leave holes behind.

Doc responds with impressively overengineered contraptions like a cannon that shoots charged creepers at Grian's base and an arrow that can blow through netherite armor and kill Scar in one hit. He also creates a walking machine that can move along the side of the Perimeter and lob TNT towards his neighbors, but does not deploy it. Doc mentions that he is purposefully avoiding putting creepers in Scarland because he is a huge fan of Scar's design work and doesn't think Scar could successfully handle charged creepers (which is demonstrably true).

While being heckled by Gem, Impulse and Scar to build the back of his base, Grian convinces Scar to play hooky and go visit the new massive tunnel borer that Doc has built in the Perimeter. After several successful uses, they both hit the ignition button at the same time and destroy the entire machine. After some initial panic, they try to apologize with a pile of diamond blocks (something Doc super-duper does not need) along with a box of Scarland merchandise, some fairly good TCG cards, and one of Grian's duped dragon eggs.

Doc retaliates for the loss of his tunnel bore in his usual manner, by breaking Minecraft in impressive ways using crazy redstone machines. He parks dozens of wither skull bullets above Scarland and turns Grian's nether portal sideways and only one block tall. He creates a massive sign in the Perimeter forbidding Grian and Scar from entering.

Grian leads Zedaph on a quest to prove that Zedaph is worthy to possess a duped dragon egg. The first trial of the quest is to explode a block of TNT in a little-used portion of Doc's base, revealing a clue hidden behind a wall. Zedaph follows instructions and does so, and neither he nor Grian clean up the mess afterwards.

Doc, after using a redstone and ender-pearl based teleportation device to camp the button and collect all three of Mumbo's friendship crowns, uses the purple crown to set a trap for Grian. He places a TNT cannon below Mumbo's base and rigs it to shoot when a zombie wearing the purple crown is killed. Grian kills the zombie and retrieves the crown, but the cannon blows a hole through the redstone door of The Vault and destroys it. Most of The Vault is undamaged, but Mumbo does briefly convince Grian that the prank blew up his entire base, causing Grian to burn the friendship crown in shame.

Grian and Scar don their disguises as Poultryman and Hotguy to descend into the Perimeter and build an enormous chicken-making machine. Through significant AFKing and leading chickens around with seeds, they fill a substantial portion of the Perimeter with 6k-10k chickens and many more eggs. As collateral damage, their activities break the chunk loader that holds Doc's dragon pet in position and allow it to move far away from its usual position. Doc recruits Zedaph to help clean up chickens to repay him for his part in the earlier base damage, and he recruits Ren because he is bored and likes to chase chickens.

During the cleanup process, Doc builds a nether portal link between his base and Grian's base, relocating a few thousand chickens into Grian's base.

Grian recruits Scar and Mumbo into an alliance to keep an eye on the "aggressions" of their neighbor. They call themselves The Buttercups, a plant that is poisonous to goats, and build an adorable encampment on the edge of the Perimeter to keep an eye on things. They are briefly derailed when Scar and Mumbo realize they can /kick Grian by dropping any gravity block in his vicinity, but the alliance holds together.

Doc builds an automated dragon-egg duper capable of dispensing 112k dragon eggs per hour and collects tens of thousands of dragon eggs. With Ren's extremely enthusiastic help, he places thousands of duped dragon eggs in and around The Buttercups' bases, especially in Scarland.

So that's where things stand as of now, July 7! I'm sure I've probably missed some things, feel free to shout them out for me! We can only wait and see how big and horrifying things get from here...

[princess-glassred]

Losers Club Minecraft Headcannons

Richie

Constantly hopping up and down with out any signs of stopping. He is literally unable of walking anywhere in minecraft, and he constantly crouches and uncrouches whenever he has to stand still. If he stops being stimulated for one moment he wants to punch things.

Had a serious tnt and flint and steel problem at one point, now it's a server rule to limit his tnt usage and keep it far away from everyone's base.

Built a lot of penis shaped buildings before the novelty wore off.

Basically just a minecraft parasite, never gathering materials of his own and just constantly going "is for me 👉🏻👈🏻🥺". Stan's not even sure he wants to play the game, just wants to hang out with them.

constantly decked out in gold armor until he realized how shitty it was.

names all his animals stupid shit because he knows it annoys the crap out of Eddie

Mic quality is ABYSMAL. he sounds like he's conversing with them from the marianas trench.

His frame rate is also pretty ass

Dies A LOT.

Minecraft skin is a creeper in suit

Ben

Very good at redstone and building houses, sometimes using Redstone to create really cool effects around his base.

Has been approached multiple times by Eddie literally BEGGING him to build him a secret space so Richie doesn't touch his shit.

He really likes the End but hates the Nether for some reason

has a collection of secret little redstone projects somewhere he won't let his friends see cause they're kinda personal.

Wrote poetry for Bev in one of those minecraft books then threw it in the ocean.

Master of the command block

Extensively checks the minecraft wiki

Trades with villagers the most out of everyone

Knows all the mods cause he's addicted to watching minecraft mod showcases

The only one who can figure out what the fuck education edition is

Minecraft skin is just a space texture

Eddie

-Constantly nervous about going caving or being out at night, he will start SPRINTING the second sundown hits

Utterly terrified of minecraft cave noises

Overfeeds himself all the time since the hunger bar makes him anxious

freaks out if he's under the water for even a second

Keeps his chests well organized but not nearly as much as Stan

One time Richie pranked him by telling him he better set his spawn point in the nether by sleeping and then the bed exploded, killing him. He's dreaded going to the nether ever since.

Plays minecraft the least since his mom doesn't want him on the computer too much

Spent his first night in minecraft cowering in a hole

In a weird fued with Richie where they only communicate through passive aggressive signs "Why would you keep your mom in a cage, Eddie?" "STAN FOR FUCKS SAKE BAN HIM".

Minecraft skin is literally just him, fanny pack and all

Bev

Simply adores doing little art projects on the server. She particularly loves pixel art but if she wants them to have cool effects she'll ask Ben for help red stoneing them sometimes.

Base is absolutely riddled with flowers, she really has an eye for that kinda stuff.

Really good at combat actually, especially when it comes to bows and arrows. She's had to go down and save Eddie and Richie from dying in the mines multiple times.

She fucking loves cherry wood, her whole house is cherry wood

Has like a million dogs with different colored collars

The queen of the dyes, everybody comes to her for dyes and bonemeal 24/7

Hosted a minecraft fashion show using armor stands and all the boys were surprisingly into it.

Minecraft skin in her in a white dress and flower crown

Bill

Whenever they wanna take a group screenshot he's the one to do it.

gave everyone a big rallying speech before they went into the end, only for Eddie to get glitched into a block and die right after

Very good at building mob spawners for some reason

Didn't even build his house, just went to a village and stole one of theirs

Richie dared him to write an entire novel in one of the minecraft books so he's ACTUALLY DOING IT

Loves his minecraft horse more than anything. Sometimes you can just find him riding that thing in a circle for funsies.

Always making sure to check on everyone's needs "B-bev you got enough f-fuh-food?" "Mike is your h-health good?" "Eddie is your p-pickaxe almost broken?"

Likes to type messages instead of talk since he's a little embarrassed by his stutter

The only person who knows about the poem Ben through in the ocean, he saw it but he's keepin quiet about it because it was awkward as fuck.

Minecraft skin is some random novel character nobody has ever heard of

Stan

The best at minecraft by far, and has beaten the game about a hundred times.

Ate a porkchop one time and everyone freaked the fuck out

Doing the most work out of everyone on this server

Punches Richie anytime he's gettin too rowdy

Has like a million safety things set in place around his base to protect himself from Richie's grubby little hands, including a moat.

He actually owns the server they're on, which makes Richie crack a lot of "Get off good christian jewish minecraft server!!" jokes.

The very first of the bunch to get Diamond armor, followed by Bill

Gear absolutely stacked with enchantments

Minecraft skin is just a much more detailed and higher quality version of the steve skin

Mike

Doesn't get to play often since his uncle makes him work

Because he doesn't enjoy killing animals for his uncle he's become the biggest animal lover in minecraft

He has EVERYTHING and he'd adopt a creeper if they'd let him

He has a chicken named Richie, a dog named Bill, a cow named Ben, a mooshroom named Beverly, a horse named Stan, and a sheep named Eddie.

He's also trying to do a vegan let's play cause he really really doesn't wanna hurt the cute little minecraft mobs. He really doesn't even wanna kill slimes.

New to video games in general so Stan is patiently and delicately guiding him through the step by step process.

Everyone's constantly losing track of where he is and then finding him again on like Bev's roof or inside a random hole.

One time everyone got hungry so in a panic he hid all his animals underneath his house.

Accidentally blew up one of Bev's projects and let Richie take the blame cause he was scared

Minecraft skin is default Steve, but Stan's working on a custom one for him.

Feel free to reblog/reply to this with some of your own i would love to hear em.

[adventures-in-teyvat]

genshin on a minecraft smp

there was this prompt on reddit i saw asking what the characters would be like on an smp and this was what i came up with :) really silly and fun, i actually really enjoyed thinking about this

yoimiya is the redstone maniac, and she’d probably help klee build really complex tnt contraptions to grief the server

diluc is the mob farmer; builds the entire structure and spends literally all his time farming and enchanting. probably also enslaves the villagers

klee builds a zoo but the only thing inside of it is creeper exhibits

nahida’s the gardener, kaveh probably helps her build automatic farms and all the cool shit

bennett dies all the time—falling into lava after just having found diamonds, a bunch of creepers snuck up on him, etc etc. he can literally never progress in the game because he loses everything and anything he builds gets exploded by creepers (or klee)

xingqiu is just the little shit who steals stuff and does small bits of griefing. im also convinced that he and fischl would be writing a roleplay script for the server and forcing everyone else to comply

nilou is just sweet and happy, she just wants to build a pretty home and get along with everyone :) she’s the one who always helps others out no matter what, whether they need food, weapons, armor, or blocks, she almost always has something to help, and if she doesn’t then she’d be willing to help you get it.

wanderer grinds everything by himself and completely ignores everyone. might even try to beat the dragon by himself too. xingqiu and fischl explain him in the lore as the rude old man who no one ever sees, but occasionally he will grant luxurious gifts to anyone he deems mildly tolerable. the only people who have ever received such gifts are sayu and layla because they do jack shit and are afk most of the time, and he thinks it’s funny.

venti is the first one with elytra. cons yoimiya into giving him all her fireworks. farms music discs

albedo and sucrose are predictably the ones with all the potions. they’ve also scoured the nether; they know it better than anyone else, and they make all the ice bridges for quick nether travel.

layla and sayu are always the ones asking to sleep first—if he is online, there will be a following “fuck you” from diluc, as he is the server’s resident mob farmer and batman kinnie

alhaitham refuses to participate in the “lore” because “fuck you” (fischl cries) (xingqiu demands a duel, for thou hast made his fair lady shed a tear) (alhaitham obliterates him and goes on with his day)

xiangling forces chongyun to share a house with her because the only thing she wants to do is make a farm and kill animals and throw food at everyone and thats literally it. she’s probably really frustrated there aren’t more elaborate meals to make. forces chongyun to build the house and mine and get armor and weapons and literally anything that doesn’t have to do with food (xingqiu visits sometimes to say hi to xiangling and then bully chongyun). she probably also mooches off of nahida and kaveh’s automatic farms

cyno is immediately elected chief of police in the “lore” (the only other people on this “police force” are xiao and heizou)

xiao is completely serious about his job, heizou is not. cyno is a mix of the two. basically all they do is show up occasionally and act really intimidating (or, in heizou’s case, flirt with everyone). yanfei (the judge in the lore) is sick of them for wrongfully incarcerating innocent people over and over again

tighnari and collei have an ACTUAL zoo that isn’t just full of creepers

diona lives with diluc and literally the only thing she does is breed cats, she has so many that it lags the server if you walk into the chunk, so the “police” have sometimes had to stop by and make her spread them out. she’ll comply but then the next day there will be even more cats because she does everything out of spite. also steals everyone’s nametags. she is a convicted felon, charged with multiple accounts of armed robbery, assault, and intentional failure to comply with the wishes of the server, which resulted in harm to one or more players or the entire server (it nearly becomes unplayable because of all the cats so they ban her)

zhongli terraforms the shit out of everything

dori creates a monopoly off of some resource by taking all of it in the vicinity and anywhere remotely nearby so that if someone didnt want to buy it from her they’d have to run thousands of blocks away

fischl builds the entire castle from last year’s summer event, crowns herself prinzessin, and appoints her knights (kaeya, mika, jean, bennett, razor) who start to have beef with the police and then there’s a war and then it gets resolved by klee and yoimiya blowing everything up

[echotunes]

@royalarchivist your dms seem to be turned off but I took some timestamp notes for Quackity's very late night stream! in case you can use these for your timestamp archive

6:33 "I need to go really far away before I explain what I'm doing here. Okay?" (teleports to his Richarlyson area)

7:45 "all admins, now that the eggstatistics have been posted, are gone" he also says he thinks Forever is using an autoclicker which is illegal; Q wants to break rules to see what'll happen, so he reads them all out:

do not abuse glitches or game mechanics

do not utilise unintended minecraft features such as iron golem farms, dupe glitches, villager breeding, gold farms, tnt machines - "I don't know how to do any of that"

do not travel to the end dimension, it's currently locked - "I don't know how to find that either"

"I'm gonna save rule 4"

no hacking

use common sense and try not to ruin other content creators' content "I could go into badboyhalo's room and mess up his content but he's not streaming right now so that doesn't count"

if you find a bug or a game-breaking mechanic please communicate it to staff - "I know none as of now"

you are allowed to play off-stream, but try not to make significant progress - "I could grind all night. actually that wouldn't be offstream that doesn't make any sense"

you cannot get more than two rows of hearts - "anyone know where [the hearts-providing statue] might be? metagaming is against the rules so I'm already breaking a rule here" -> he decides to go to Tallulah's garden to use her statue

12:20 he breaks into Wilbur & Tallulah's house to look for the statue

13:00 he gets himself six more hearts "this is fucking fun, what the hell, no admins are on, this is fun"

13:36 4. do not travel to the nether, it's currently locked "well to hell with that" - he goes back to the Richarlyson place and wants to make a Nether portal because "I just wanna see what happens"; he doesn't want to use the favela Nether portal because he "doesn't want to be near there"

14:50 BBH notices in chat that q is online - q responds "ignore me" and starts building a nether portal

18:11 (after yelling at chat for making fun of him about his limited nether portal knowledge) "tiktok's gonna have a field day with that one. they're gonna say like… quackity explodes on stream"

19:28 (after misplacing obsidian) "I misclicked. It can happen with JuanaFlippa, it can happen with me."

23:34 he tries to enter the Nether portal and is teleported back to spawn instead, which gives him the advancements We Need To Go Deeper and Subspace Bubble since he's so far away from spawn. he immediately starts wondering if there's a way to glitch it and make it send him to the Nether anyway

26:40 while he's breaking his portal to rebuild it somewhere else, one of the faceless Cucurucho construction workers shows up and starts punching him, then gives him a book & quill saying "stop breaking the rules!" he asks where the "normal" Cucurucho is and says "can I just try?"

28:10 "what are you? what the fuck are you?" he tries to start breaking the portal again but they keep punching him

28:40 he attacks and kills the Cucurucho construction worker (BBH in chat: o_O what the fudge, quackity what are you doing) and loots their corpse, notably finding 113 Netherrack, 7 ancient debris and 11 quartz in their inventory. He logs off because he killed an admin, saying he'll go back tomorrow and sell the Nether blocks they were carrying to Foolish; he says he'll be playing with Vegetta at 12pm PST, and ends stream

[badboyfriends]

ok im bad at staying focused . QUICK WEIRD HEADCANONS

With Players, upon respawning, the fatal wound is healed, so they don't fall into a slow and painful death-loop. Smaller non-fatal wounds are kept, but usually are scabbed or healed over. You can feel the pain of both. More powerful Admins can prevent most scarring and mark-leaving injuries entirely.

Scar has a curse that makes him retain all scars and injuries, regardless of death, or intervention. Only manually healing and treating wounds can help. Something he, typically, does not take the time to do.

Grian is partially deaf, with tinnitus, in part to . both Yandere High School and his love for tnt. He uses hearing aids and hides batteries for them...everywhere. including on people. he can just grab Mumbo or Scar and pull out a pair of hearing aid batteries from somewhere on their clothes, no matter the outfit. He knows Japanese and British sign language.

Stress is comedically always somewhere in the distance from Iskall. they say something stupid and you can just vaguely hear Stress shout something correcting them, or laughing at them.

Players have different religions. Players that spent most of their time in Survival, single player, normal servers, usually say "Oh my Dev", or "Oh my Void" interchangeably. Some massive Servers do not allow Players to leave until a certain age. those Servers usually have some variation of god. Gord (Yandere high school), Dream XD (dreamsmp), Lady Irene (minecraft diaries), etc. it is. human nature to rediscover religion i guess

Chat, which represents youtube comment section and live stream messages, are little vexes and wisps of code with intelligence. not quite alive, but vaguely sentient and omnipresent. They can take control of different things. Only some people can hear them, and unless you're a Vex hybrid, you cannot hear other people's chats. You can, however, see them when they're manifested as things.

Grian's Chat takes a different form to talk to him every season. His Chat started in Evo SMP, as sentient clayballs. Season 6 of Hermitcraft, baby chickens. Season 7, parrots. Season 8, eggs. Season 9, pebbles and rocks.

Scar's Chat just doesn't try to hide. They're Vexes. so is Cubs.

Doc's was creepers. they were still hostile, his Chat would just speak through them before they exploded or die. they found it hilarious. They have since changed to be goats.

Xisuma's appears as messages inside his helmet, while also talking to him.

Joe's chat is a comedical mix of things. Some are floating dish rags like ghosts. Some are just lime green panes of glass. Right now (s9/empires crossover) they are the cats. Usually they don't bother with a form.

Ren's Chat are dogs, AND dog stuffed animals. some of Chat didn't get the memo and thats ok.

[lateforthisappgirl]

Can you please explode Dino with that TNT? | Jeon Wonwoo

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“No, Y/N I cannot just blow Dino’s head off with this TNT”

His voice was only a little bit annoyed so she tried again.

“Why not tho? Chan said that he would be a better kisser than you when we were playing that board game with him the other day”

Y/N smirked upon seeing the expression that showed on her Wonwoo’s handsome face. She was pretty bored from just watching how her boyfriend is playing uneventful gameplay and couldn’t resist to annoy him just a little bit.

“If I could told him about us I would have show him just how wrong he was right there and then”

She shrugged her shoulders trying to ignore how red her cheeks got and patted his biceps from her place on his lap.

“Yeah but then our little dark secret would go into the word and that’s just too scary” she said honestly ”also I would have to kiss him also to judge fairly”

He didn’t like that last comment. She was quickly thrown off his lap onto the couch next to him. Wonwoo was now looking at his girlfriend very much horrified.

“What?” He asked slowly and put his controller and earbuds away.

“Well I guess you two could kiss and then decide which one is a better kisser. I can be a little bit biased when it comes to you” she joked throwing one of her arms around Wonwoo’s waist while the other played with his t-shirt.

Only then he was sure she wasn’t serious.

“ oh my god woman I thought you wanted to kiss Chan”

Y/N laughed and kissed his both chicks.

“Why would I when I have the best kisser in the world all to myself?”

Wonwoo definitely liked that remark cause the space between him and his girlfriend got even smaller.

“Wonwoo I really like where this is going and all but Chan is killing you in the game right now with a freaking stick”

That was enough for him to grab his controller back. He didn’t push her away tho, only tacked her safely under his arm while his chin rested on her head.

“So now did he manage to pull something awful enough to be exploded with TNT?” She asked and Wonwoo only smiled viciously and started to chase after the younger one’s character with a torch and a red block of TNT.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hi my dearest readers💃 I’m just throwing new drabbles left and right because of school vacations and too much free time so if you want more content just follow my blog and try not to cringe too much ♥️

Ps: I honestly don’t really know if Wonwoo plays Minecraft and I don’t think that Dino is really into playing with him but let’s ignore that for this story👌

[pinklofthousecookie]

gorillaz minecraft headcanons

note: this is literally so random i had this in my head taking a shower so these are all random shower thoughts lmao

———————————————————————-

noodle:

she does a little bit of everything like mining, fighting mobs, getting food, building, etc

she likes to go to villages just to see the cats

she will sometimes put cakes and flowers in everyone’s rooms

she was like the only one fighting the ender dragon 😭

murdoc:

he will mine/look for every diamond he can find and hides it away in a secret vault he built. when questioned where all the diamonds are he shrugs or he says he used “some” for armor

he likes to blow up 2D with TNT

when everyone went to the end he couldn’t fight the ender dragon because he kept looking at enderman on accident and kept dying

his favorite place is the nether for obvious reasons

2D:

he tries to adopt every dog he sees to make a dog army

he likes building random stuff like gardens, shops, he likes to make cute little areas around the world

he’s scared of drowns and the nether

he couldn’t fight the ender dragon because he was still on earth lost in the stronghold and couldn’t find the portal

russ:

the builder friend 100%, he made the house for everyone to live in and helped decorating their rooms, he gives 2D tips on how to make the little areas he makes better

he likes enchanting everyone’s armor

he likes to explore a lot, like finding temples and mob spawners to see if he gets any good loot

tried to help noodle fight the ender dragon by destroying the nether stars but because he is bad with a bow and arrow he had to build his way up the end spikes to explode the nether stars

———————————————————————

i hope you guys enjoy, this is my first attempt at trying to make headcanons so idk if it’s accurate at all but this is just what i think 😭

[samsayswhatever]

Had a dream where Loki and Mobius were family friends of mine, and somehow we all lived in an all white lego mansion. It was sleek and square, and it had a pool and everything in life was easy peasy summery breezy.

But then the evil time-vines arrived and started tearing the house apart. The vines started to release a fog so we couldn't see then we realized that it was smoke, but it was too late. The vines caught some of the lego bricks on fire, and they were secretly minecraft tnt blocks!

The house exploded and we barely made it out alive. But the vines were still attacking and we didn't know when the next bomb would go off.

So Loki put Mobius in a giant clear plastic Chinese food container (that used to be his office), and kicked him into space to save him. Mobius flew across the sky in slow motion, face pressed against the weird plastic wall like it was one of those windows when you visit a jail. He was not ready to say goodbye and Loki and I knew and it was so sad and we were all crying.

Then me and Loki just clung to each other as the pale legos fell around us and exploded, and my ears were ringing, and we slowly suffocated under a steady stream of dominos sugar that was falling through the broken ceiling like a sand timer.

[kisuminight]

Magic, Weaponry, Social Life. Choose two.

-That's how Mercedes Lackey defines the worldbuilding around the skills of the heralds of Valdemar, and that it what we're going for here. Especially in a Minecraft-style universe where there's so much time just taken up by survival.

All Blades are "good" with their Soul Weapon. They know it's exact dimensions, how it moves and how it hits. Likewise, they are very in-tune with their elements. But that doesn't mean that the skill has reached a "useful" level.

Very old Blades have enough experience and Procedural Memory to be versatile, but most younger Blades tend to either specialize in melee artes (elemental ability added to physical blows) or specialize in long range spells/artes. They usually don't do in-between.

Technically c!Techno'd be one of the ones who specialized in Magic and Weaponry and did not do Social Life, but he's old enough that the distinction doesn't matter.

I said I was using Tales of artes for the "spells" in addition to general Minecraft enchantments, so I'll try to adapt what they do to general Minecraft game mechanics. Please also assume that Blades have matching elemental enchantments--so all ice Blades have Frost Walker, all fire Blades have Fire Aspect, all water Blades have Depth Strider, etc.

Under cut because this is long:

c!Philza - as a bow character, he would fall more under the "magic" side of Blades. As an Aegis he's also very good at the "weaponry" part. A mix of both. He can toggle Frost Walker on/off, and can walk easily on powder snow, no matter what type of armor he has.

Sheer Cold - Phil can adjust his own temperature, and the temperature of surrounding blocks downwards. Since he is an Aegis, there is basically no distance limit and the lowest temperature he can reach is very close to 0 degrees Kelvin. It takes more concentration and more power to chill things that are further away, so Phil usually uses this either as a close-ranged attack or to keep himself from feeling cold out in the tundra.

Shuffle - Basic manipulation ability. Can manipulate ice/snow blocks without touching or mining them

Snowball - equivalent of extra hotbar space with infinite snowballs

Ice Arrow - forms arrows out of ice to fire from a bow. Functional Infinity, may freeze the opponent.

Frigid Moon - slashes his weapon in front of him in an arc that creates a crescent-shaped blade of ice. Blade is 3 blocks wide and travels straight for 10 blocks

Frozen Starlight - a plunging attack. When he hits the ground, causes ice elemental aether to bloom out under/around him for damage

Ice breath - breathes out a cloud of ice elemental aether. Short range attack. 3 blocks wide in front of him and only two out on range.

As an Aegis Phil can use many more abilities from many other elements, but these are a few of his favorite ones.

~

c!Techno - more of a "weaponry" fighter. Has had minimal social life, so also plenty of magic knowledge as well. Most of his abilities tend to be either melee or large-scale destruction.

Earthsense - allows Techno to feel the types of blocks around him, as wells as the positions of people or mobs standing on those blocks. He is a powerful Blade in Resonance with an Aegis, so his range is wide, maybe 100 block radius? Things that are closer to him are easier to distinguish.

Shuffle - basic manipulation. Can re-arrange dirt/stone blocks without touching or mining them.

Earthworks - extra hotbar space with infinite dirt blocks

Reinforcement - makes stone tools and weapons more durable (Unbreaking) and slightly stronger (Sharpness)

Imbue Earth - strikes a block, marking it with a seal. If the block is touched or stepped on, will explode like TNT

Grand Cataclysm - cracks the blocks apart in a 20x20 block area. The lines/seams between all blocks in the area glow, and damage is done to all entities within the area. Upon completion, all blocks on the "level" of the plane the arte was used on disintegrate; does not count as mining, cannot be picked up.

Ground Dasher - opens a chasm beneath the target, 10 blocks long, 10 blocks deep. Spikes of earth come up and damage the target, then break. Target and other entities in the area fall into the chasm (potential fall damage)

Gravity Well - earth/lightning, Techno must borrow aether from Phil to use. Creates a field, 20x20 block radius on both x and y axis. All blocks within that field become "falling blocks" (like sand), with the center of gravity set to the center of the field.

~

c!Dream - as a healing Blade, most of his powers fall under the "magic" side. Is bad with time management and has friends who like to mess around with weapons with him, so does keep general weaponry skill even if most artes are not weapon-based

Awareness - we've talked about this passive before. Attention is focused on Dream; the more power he uses the more people are aware of him. Inverse relationship between people focusing their attention on him and them actually listening to what he's saying.

Pow Hammer - traditional for Tales series support characters! Dream's one melee-focused arte. Creates a red hammer that squeaks when it hits something. Auto-stun upon hitting. 5% chance of spawning a Toss Hammer (god colored, same sound effect), which applies Wither effect for 2min when hit

First Aid - heals 2 hearts

Nurse - applies a regen effect

Recovery - heals 6 hearts

Restore - full healing

Resurrection - exactly what it says. Light-elemental specific. Can cure zombified villagers. Is not the same as the Resurrection Ritual from the Revival Book

Dazzle - dancing green light spots, generally a distraction. Can be focused and used as a laser pointer (but no damage)

Flash - raises light levels to 15 in a 5 block radius for 5 sec. Sets undead on fire.

Gleam - makes the shine of light on armor/weapons brighter or duller for 1 day

Sacrifice - kills user in exchange for full heal to all friends and massive damage to all foes (Dream doesn't remember he has this)

~

c!Punz - more focused on the "weaponry" side. Some artes, has begun learning more as part of the fascination with the Revival Book.

Notice-me-Not - this passive allows Punz to deflect attention from himself and anyone in close proximity of them. Can be pierced by a determined light Blade, but they must know Punz is there first. Does work on cameras; cameras will still record, but anyone watching will have their attention deflected.

Swift Sneak III

Shadow Fury - several weapon strikes coated in dark elemental aether.

Violent Pain - is struck by dark lightning, dealing 2 hearts of damage. Cannot move for 4 sec. After that, attack is increased and damage Punz deals will ignore all positive effects/buffs (ignores protection, if attacking someone using Turtle Master, will still hit the full amount from Punz but opponent will still have slowed speed)

Nightmare - sleep inducing arte. Gives opponents who are sleeping poison damage until they wake up.

Punz is a relatively new Blade, compared to most others on the server. He's actually most dangerous as an assassin, rather than a fighter. His abilities mean he can put a group of enemies to sleep or walk through them without being noticed, "mute" the person he is trying to kill so that death messages/calls for help can't go out, and then kill them without anybody realizing it was him. Just because that's easiest for him, however, doesn't mean he's a slouch in a fight.

~

c!Skeppy - old enough to have worked around both the "magic" and the "weaponry" options. Originally fell on the side of "magic."

Voices of the World - Skeppy's passive allows him to hear snippets of conversations on the wind. It works better the higher up that he is. Not all of the voices he hears are current - sometimes the wind brings him snippets of information from the distant past, sometimes it is something echoing back from the future. Mostly Skeppy doesn't worry about them, though he does use them to prank Bad.

Automatic Feather Falling IV

Respiration III

Homing shot - uses mastery of the winds to turn regular arrows into homing arrows.

Meteor Storm - rips up blocks, throwing them up into the sky, and then back down at the opponent. Blocks act like TNT upon striking.

Shredding Winds - causes a tornado of wind blades 2x2 block area to form, before firing off at opponent. Can hit any target in 10 block radius, seeking/homing

Cyclone Seal - traps a target inside a 2x2 block area, sucks the air out before collapsing. Can be used to launch enemies, depending on how Skeppy collapses it

Wind's Howl - activates the effect of Wind Burst III with a regular attack

Skeppy's abilities tend to be less physically powerful than, say, Techno or Phil's, but they make up for it by most being homing abilities with short cooldowns.

~

This is getting long, so I will cap it here. I'm still not entirely sure what I want c!Callahan or c!Slime's abilities to be. If you think all of these abilities sound really strong, it's because the DSMP is a relative outlier in that it not only has multiple Blades, but it has multiple powerful Blades. In terms of power level, the order goes:

Philza (100) > Techno (20) = Dream (20) > Skeppy (18) > Punz (16) > Slime (13) > Callhan (12)

[sparkbeast20]

Head empty only gamer!MC with the demon kings‼️( and other devils too )

- Satan plays games with MC the most and he probably the toxic Valorant player😭

-Beelzebub along with Satan plays games with MC too and I think hes pretty chill about it

- Paimon plays dress up games💯he probably play Genshin or Honkai or both just bc of the characters and designs ( I mean, who doesnt? )

- Leraye plays games like Valorant, Apex Legend, anything games about shooting

- Paimon and Satan probably plays some bloody games too ( Yandere Simulator?Idk )

- Mammon just buys MC Nintendo switches and all gaming related stuffs for them

- Leviathan don't play games much, but if MC plays with him then he enjoy it pretty much

- Paimon rambling about any hot characters to others ( along with MC 😻 )

- I think Paimon, Leraye and MC probably have a gaming sleepover ( I HC Paimon and Leraye are best friends )

- Satan, surprisingly, built a very beautiful house on Minecraft but Beelzebub exploded it after ( and Satan try to kill him )

- MC have a gaming set ( or whatever you called it )bc Mammon bought it for them

- Any demon kings sitting on MC gaming chair while MC sitting on their lap playing video games 👀

I would see Satan be one of those toxic players, cause he just love making trouble and making people angry.

Beelzebub would dick around with MC and Satan. Like he's one of those players that would get a little bored and just mess with these two for the fun of it.

Yeah, Paimon would love those games. I think he would like Splatoon too seeing that he likes making messes and that game is perfect for him

Leraye would play those games and get called out for using some sort of aim bot, but he just laughs and say to the other players that they ain't nothing on him. He is pure skill.

I think they play horror games that shows more blood and just body horror in general.

Sugar Daddy coming 🤑

I think Leviathan would play with MC if it's a chill game that doesn't need too much afford. Like farming games. Or whatever is animal crossing is.

True!

Yes, though throw in Sitri there just in case of something bad happens lol

I would imagine Satan making a beautiful house in minecraft as a way to calm himself down and once he finish the house he would show MC, so he logs out and that when Beelzebub comes in and set a TNT trap so when Satan comes back with MC and opens the door. The TNT set off and blowing the whole house down. The hunt for Beelzebub begins

Yes. Again, Mammon's is there 😏

And lets end it with one of my favorite couple gesture 😍🥰😍

[thesunshineriptide]

first off i kiss your writing on the head it’s so nice and i hold gently how you write ortho. he is sososososo cute

i come again with another ortho request. may i have some platonic ortho sleepover headcanons? stealing him (/J this is consensual), bringing him to ramshackle and having a nice sleepover with him because he deserves it (ft grim if you’re feeling up to it!!!)

SDFKJSKJGHDSFJKN thank you youre. So sweet and i love seeing your comments on the stuff i post it always makes me so happy. i am SO sorry for this taking forever (and especially with the lack of content I was able to provide) but thank you so much for being such a good sport I really appreciate it <3 /gen /srs

Weekend at Ramshackle Dorm

Convincing Idia to leave Ortho alone with you is…difficult. He doesn’t mind when Ortho goes out during the daytime, since he’s usually nearby and always comes back to charge at night, but a sleepover somewhere else? Now, that’s…thats a little scary for him

Especially since HE wasn’t going to be coming so if something went wrong…

It takes a lot of coaxing, promising, and setting up systems before Ortho is allowed to spend the night at Ramshackle dorm

Idia is both against this idea but also very proud at the same time, which is how your sleepover gets delayed because Idia has to make some adjustments

The adjustments are a set of pajamas (well….a new body that’s modeled to look like pajamas…and a new charging port while he’s at it)

Also as a part of Ortho getting to stay over…Grim has to be somewhere else.

Coincidentally, Idia is free that night and LOVES cats (plus they have matching fire hair?? So like-)

Basically, it’s baby swap for the night.

With ortho, there’s a pretty limited number of things he can do at a sleep over. Pranks aren’t gonna fly - first of all, he’s a child, but second, Idia will kill you. He can’t eat, so snacking is mostly just you, and he can see any movie instantly. So what can you do?

A lot, actually. Ortho may not be able to eat, but he’s happy to help make some cookies, especially when you agree to let him take some to Idia. https://www.instructables.com/Minecraft-Chocolate-Chip-Cookies-IRL/ 

He’s also a big fan of fortune tellers/cootie catchers, apparently. It’s not something he’s ever seen before, since Idia stays to official games instead of ✨kids games✨

He has to set up his charging station in his own room (Idia SAID) so you end up spending some time just making the room comfy before he enters rest mode

He needs goodnight hugs 

Still a little bit before he goes to bed so you two settle down and watch a movie together (finding Nemo)

Ortho beeped cheerfully as you stood in the kitchen with him, dancing happily as the music playing.

“I shoot my arrows in the air, some-times,

Sayin' ay-oh, creepers K-O'd,

Loot his remains and now his sulfur's, mine,

Sayin' ay-oh, not today-no,”

Ortho’s joints whirr as he puts his hands above his head, head thrown back and eyes shut as he giggles and sings along, “And then I go to work, Under the birch tree, And I'll make myself, Tons of TNT.” He grins, sharp teeth on full display, “I can do that too, you know. Want me to show you? Initiating hyperbeam cannon…”

“No!” You yelped, “I- I mean, no thank you. Shut…shut that off, please.”

Ortho did as told with a sheepish smile,  “Your heart rate and adrenaline levels went up considerably. Apologies for startling you.”

“It’s alright, Ortho. Let just not set off anything potentially deadly in the dorm, okay?”

Ortho nods enthusiastically. His eyes light up a bit, “Scanning room for potentially deadly machinery.” He spins around, staring at the room, “Matches found. Match: Oven. Dirty ovens make up for 1 in 5 housefires. Match: Phone. That brand of phone is made cheaply and has had several instances of catching on fire spontaneously due to the batteries exploding. Match-”

You laugh nervously, “You’re right, but maybe I should make it clear. I actually meant potentially deadly weaponry, not just general machinery. In other words…a laser cannon.”

Ortho nods, “Oooh, I understand now. Updating system…”

You smile slightly, swaying back and forth as the song plays. You stare at the cookies baking in the oven, the scent wafting through the air as Ortho updates himself.

“Complete. Thank you for teaching me about safety, Y/n L/n!”

You hum approval and smile, “Of course. Now, you were gonna show me a dance?”

“Oh! Right!” Ortho smiles, buzzing his way over to where your phone sits. He pulls down the video playing on YuuToobe and taps something in, giggling slightly with mischief as he does so.

“Beep, beep, I’m a sheep, beep beep, I’m a sheep.” Begins to play, and you let out a sigh. Ortho grins wider as the song continues.

“Yeah, now some of you might be wondering, How exactly does one beep beep like a sheep? Take it away, Gabe!”

You sigh and settle against the counter, checking the clock idly. Ortho has been doing this at random all night, and you manage to fall for it every. Single. Time. You wonder if the fact Idia made this possible might be a form of revenge against you.

“Step one: throw your hands up and point them to the floor! Step two: Here's what to do, now get down on all fours!”

Ortho acts out the song dramatically, due to the fact that Idia, in his infinite wisdom, created a function specifically so Ortho could elongate his limbs like a cartoon character. It is simultaneously sweet, cute, and rapidly becoming a bit annoying.

“Step three: Just bounce around, it's easy, follow me! Step four: Go crazy now, and beep beep like a sheep!”

Ortho sways from side to side, looking much like a rubberhose animation come to life, as he laughs and giggles and begins to chirp and beep. For as much as his joke was becoming tiresome (and a little uncanny from his dancing) it was a pleasure to see him happy, so you bite your tongue.

The oven beeps as the timer on the cookies goes off, and Ortho beeps back at it every time it blares. You laugh as you pull out the cookies and set them on the stovetop before turning off the oven and closing the door.

The song continues to play, though Ortho’s abandoned his dancing in order to hover next to you and peak at the cookies.

“They look so realistic! Thank you, Y/N!” Ortho says, smiling even wider than before, “I’m sure they are delicious. Thank you for letting me bake with you, despite not being able to eat them.”

You laugh and ruffle his (flaming, OW) hair, “Hey, it’s never a guarantee that they’ll turn out, but it’s the process that counts. Thank you for baking with me. Now - while the cookie’s are cooling, you wanna set up your room? After that we can watch a movie, and I can deal with putting the cookies away later.”