#femsoc

[butch-reidentified]

it's so cute how everyone acknowledges grooming as a real thing but as soon as we say (such as in conversations about female body hair removal) girls/women are groomed our entire lives to appeal to men, we're "misogynistic" for "calling women stupid"

Edit Jan 7, 2024:

My wife thinks I should have included an analogy in the original post (like the CEO example in my recent reblog), but in my conversation with her she pointed out that under the broad definition of grooming, all raising of children could be considered "grooming them for adult life." She makes a good point!!

The actual definition isn't inherently about sexual predation despite what the internet may have led some of you to assume. This is a good opportunity for me to remind *everyone* to fact check *everything* you learn online before repeating it to anyone and possibly spreading misinformation - including definitions of words you learn online! We ALL do this sometimes!

Screenshot below of #2 and #3 under the definition of "grooming" (#1 is obviously about animal fur lol):

I do find it interesting that the broader definition (#2) inherently includes what is detailed in #3, yet #3 was explicitly added (I assume at a later date than #2, given the context and numerical order). It's redundant, and I do have some criticisms of the way it's worded/the specifics of it. I wonder how other dictionaries define it.

[swagyna]

i wanna post on here but what it is, is just too fuckin heavy for tumblr.

[teddykaczynski]

i wish other students werent such cowards about asking questions/contributing in class like i can be the only one that does it!!! but you need to too for your own learning!!!! i dont even think its wholly a femsoc vs malesoc issue bc the men in my classes yesterday also didnt do as much. in one of these classes it was pretty much only women asking questions and this was after the prof was like. btw does anyone have any questions About Class like how it works whats expected etc. idk sometimes im in a class situation like that and i really dont have any questions which may have been the case with these students too but still like. Just do it!

[listlessnessss]

Instead of amab/afab and msoc/femsoc, which has some people really hashtag triggered, i'm going to just be more brutally honest and call things, people, and experiences malebrained/fembrained because it gets to the heart of what people are gesturing at when they say amab/afab, doesn't correlate 1:1 to assigned sex, and can be changed if one so wishes. now that type 2 trans people are transitioning because they genuinely want to and now we know that gender identity, sexual orientation, and gender stereotypes are different things, we see a mix and match resulting in, for example, fembrained ftms.

Now to discuss a recent twitter dot com controversey. (I unironically think twitter is the most toxic place on the internet, because more people inc normies use it, and are not anonymous and can receive public figure status). a tguy made a comic about his experience with toxic masculinity and the QRTs essentially showed him toxic masculinity proper (ie. you're not a real man statements) and the leftist internet would 9/11 itself if those insults and behaviors were happening between or directed towards cis men. okay like yes i do think there can be a bit of a malignant learned helplessness among ftm-spectrum people due to fembrained upbringing and socialization. (see how much better it works) BUT this does not mean men should not be fembrained, and when you're criticizing feminity, you're missing that positive femininty exists within any and all genders. The malignant learned helplessness thing is much overplayed by people who have a bone to pick with ftm-spectrum people in the first place, and by the more normie "TMAW" cis contingent...

Such malignant learned helplessness is a highly specific negative trait correlated with a small but real percentage of ftms (and cis women, but curiously nobody seems to have a problem with them behaving like that... transphobia. I gather that people find it uncanny and offensive, or unfair, in some way when people who behave like this identify with manhood, and I'm a cis they them woman who's crypto so I don't really get a say in the social dynamics... but.) But it is not characteristic of nor necessary for transmasculine self-identification. The transandrophobia crowd would do well to listen, at least sometimes, to cis feminine and or gay men, on some issues. If they want their own tguy space, I think that's fine, too. I'm really live-and-let-live on these types of social issues. But people should be able to make a kind of informed consent when it comes to their behaviors, to fully weigh the pros and cons with the understanding of how such behaviors will be received by the outgroup and within the ingroup.

I do agree that there's some lack of guidance/theory/writing on the effects of toxic masculine expectations and the norms of the "universal malebrained" and how they can negatively impact ftm-spectrum people's understandings of themselves. I myself saw myself to be at the bottom of this kind of totem pole, an anomaly, a shut-out, and knowledge of social uncanniness has served as the limiting factor for my self-understanding moreso than fears about physiological uncanniness (although I am for sure bonepilled, too). The solutions on offer are to 1.gaymaxx(?) (say that you're this way because you're a gay man), 2.identify with lesbianism and gain social support there, 3.be proud of looking/seeming trans. Some of these solutions are good, but they cannot with 100% accuracy lead to an elimination of 'negative feminity'.

You're free to tell me I have no fucking idea what I'm talking about... but food for thought on how msoc/femsoc, amab/afab, etc, are just more fembrained ways of saying "malebrained/fembrained". I think it is absolutely possible to psychologically transition from one into the other and to understand how you are received. Being fembrained has, for me, been not an innate quality which myself nor anyone else possesses/lacks, rather, a logic about oneself which external forces have tried to pressure me into internalizing, and which I have, in different circumstances, found myself embracing or resisting. My fembrain is an elaborate social mask.

Ultimately, it's far more important to resist characterization of that twitter guy as not-a-man (definitionally, transphobia) than to offer bizarre explanations for the complex motivation behind such backlash against him from within the ingroup.

[adhderall]

is it femsoc or do I just have a conscience 🤔🤔🤔

[stonebutchooze]

what femsoc means: feminist society

what my butch brain imagines: a dreamy pink hazy room full of femmes

[jackiechu]

9.2017 - 3. 2018 FemSoc: International Women's Day Celebrations

Designed and circulated promotional materials, worked with executive board of 12 to set-up and organise event operations (and em-cee'd the talk - Germaine Greer is terrifying in person…)

[sorpresadeshangai]

Los corazones padecen hambre, al igual que los cuerpos: ¡dennos pan, pero también dennos rosas!

[damiancolemanphotography]

Photos from the various panels and workshops at UCC FemSocs Fempower Conference Saturday. They had speakers talk about feminism, gender identity, victim blaming, sex education,non violent direct action, drag, the music industry, and burlesque, they also had panels about repeal the 8th, women in ethical business and women who write. 10-3-18 (3/3) See more on my facebook page! Link in the description. . . . . . . . . . __________________________________ #feminism #repeal #femsoc #ucc #universitycollegecork #damiancolemanphotography #canon #canon1200d #1200d #photography #photographer #freelance #damiancoleman #corkcity #irish #cork #irish_daily #hellocork_ #ireland #cork_daily #insta_ireland #irelandaily #pocket_ireland #irishphotographers #ireland_gram #irishdaily #duffypics (at University College Cork)

[femaleinacademia]

No-platforming of Linda Bellos

Not long after arriving in Cambridge, a certain angst started to build within me – incited first of all by the no-platforming of Linda Bellos, a long-time anti-racist activist and a radical, lesbian feminist. Based on her record, any Feminist Society hosting her should feel proud and grateful for the opportunity. As it happened, Peterhouse’s feminism and gender society – the Beard Society - had a different idea. 

There have been a lot of articles written online on this issue so I do not want to repeat what has already been said: https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2017/oct/06/feminist-linda-bellos-women-trans-male-violence. And those interested in what Linda Bellos in the end did say in Cambridge can watch her speech on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ec0mG6B6b9M&t=3s (Could we plausibly argue that this is hate speech or that it could deeply upset students?) 

I do however want to use this particular case as a stepping stone to explain some ideological premises of radical feminism. So, let’s take a look at Beard Society’s self-conception as a society for feminism and gender – a troubling description, because it suggests a misunderstanding of basic feminist theory.  Feminists started to use the gender as an alternative conceptualisation of notions such as sex-roles, sex-based oppression and similar ideas, meaning to explain the difference between biological reality (the sexual dimorphism of humans) and the superstructure of female oppression that was built on it. The Women’s Liberation Movement was, by definition, against women’s subjugation and they located the source of this oppression in the socialization of the sexes.  We usually understand socialization as a process through which boys and girls are made to learn the attitudes, behaviour, etc. that are associated with their sex-group (i.e. gender). By using gender, we try to highlight the difference between being born into a sex and then being socialized into a gender. Gender is thus a useful conceptual framework by which feminists can debunk the sexist idea of the existence of an innate female (or male) nature. Moreover, gender, in contrast to sex, doesn’t describe the sexual dimorphism of humans but a hierarchy. Non-liberal feminists widely share the understanding of gendered socialization as the means of perpetuating male-superiority.

Just like there is no radical account of class without exploitation, there is no radical understanding of gender without seeing the relations between the sexes as they are. It would be odd to have a Marxism & Class Society, since Marxism itself is the theory and practice of fighting against the existence of class. Similarly, the original, radical version of feminism was the fight to abolish the gender-hierarchy.

Of course, there are now as many feminisms as there are stars in the sky, and feminism is very rarely understood in the way I outlined above. If I had to guess, I would assume that Beard Society included gender in their description because they subscribed to the idea of understanding gender as an identity that could be chosen on an individual basis. If one accepts the idea that gender can be self-proclaimed, based purely upon the self-identification of the agent irrespective of socialisation, then biological males with ‘non-binary’ gender identities will appear to be just as oppressed as (or even more oppressed than!) women. I believe that the Beard Society has withdrawn the invitation of Linda Bellos because those setting the agenda of the society are more concerned about catering to this ideology of gender than they are committed to women’s freedom. After this incident, I believe it’s time for university Feminist Societies to decide between the feminist understanding of gender - it is something to get rid of because it upholds the patriarchy (as gender is inherently a system of hierarchical classification) - and the postmodernist/queer understanding of gender, where it is something to be celebrated and increasingly elaborated upon in the construction of more and more gender identities.

Perhaps, societies having the best interest of women at their heart could rename themselves as Women’s Liberation Groups or similar, to avoid confusion with the theoretically misguided and practically misleading ‘feminism & gender’ societies?

[ophiedokes]

The inherently lesbian experience of being pretty certain a woman invited you to her house to kiss but then you accidentally choose her favorite movie on Netflix and she's watching it so intently that you feel bad about interrupting her so you can kiss

[butch-reidentified]

few greater compliments in my life than last week's "damn you REALLY said 'fuck that' to female socialization" 😇 bc yeah i AM way happier and living 100x better for doing so

[ineedsomecoffeern]

Fighting for something you believe in isn't easy. If you hit a sore spot, people are going to swipe at you, gripe at you, try to undermine you, infuriate you, try to shup you up and put you back in your box. I was starting to learn that was a sign you were asking the right questions, picking the right scabs. And though it's easy to lose yourself along the way, and start focusing on all people who don't want things to change - for whatever broken, messed up reasons of their own - you can easily find your way back. By listening to the people giving you a hand back up. To the people who have your back. To the people who don't think you're a raving lunatic. Let them be your mirror - not the haters. Let them give you the strength to get the job done.

- Charlotte (What's A Girl Gotta Do by Holly Bourne)

[eriktheshark]

who wants to find me attractive and nice to be around and date me

[listlessnessss]

not feminine enough to get that femsoc taken care of CWW bisexual girl with a boyfriend who's way better looking than her experience that I was 'born' for. can't make my beautiful face and womanly figure 'work'. can't animate it correctly for some reason (possibly autism). i also don't have the right physiogamy for my personality like i was born to be a barbie type woman and whenever i dress how i actually want and quirkymaxx/authenticitymaxx, it gives columbine...

also too fembrained and too wombanly to ever be an actual man and get that societal likeability and clout-related factor of CWGM. remember that there's a massive political rearrangement required of my efforts towards manhood were they to exist. because 'the community' views gender issues and transitioning as a kind of inherent commentary on gender like there's a reason why TW have a much more coherent and comprehensive theory of themselves which i wouldn't want to corrupt or co-opt (because woman good). i kinda think that i haven't yet been brought into sociological existence but that whatever's going on inside my head doesn't really deserve to.

IWNBAM. IWNBAM. IWNBAM.

remember that having gender issues is inherently in the realm of the feminine and a man is someone who doesn't think about gender, and also that men don't talk about their issues honestly. not ever. especially not you.

i'm not even a man tho like i'm just nonbinary and considering ~the implication~. because what actually made me be as 'unironic' as ~i~ can possibly be about being they/them is that other they/thems report this 'i want to be a boy/man/male' feeling but just incompletely like 'nonbinary' isn't this third thing completely disengaged with the societal messaging (two genders). probably proof of validity tho that my language and cultural references, appearance, and behaviors are like a grotesque combination of the fembrained and the malebrained. maybe i'm not even saying there's more than two its just that i believe people can be neither/either/both/or/etc...

i'm very much 'woman who thinks she's a man'

[shinra-makonoid]

Regarding “brain sex”

@femsoc​

https://www.tumblr.com/blog/view/femsoc/667949730861580288 

Link to the post in question.

So I haven’t got the time to answer you (after my reply got deleted because blocked by OP I believe) until now but here I am. Full reply.

“So you ignore all of my sources other than the one you perceive as the weakest link, because anything other than that would require you to confront facts you don’t like.”

No it’s because I don’t need to look for them to see the ones they are. You  guys always use the same ones. Let me explain to you why it doesn’t do anything. Tomorrow I talk with someone defending homeopathy, they will tell me “Oh but you know, I actually have sources proving it works, look at this and that” with scientific studies showing that it has some effects. I’ll have to dig in and look at the results and how it was done in detail to then produce a long detailed response with my own studies, that will be answered “ahah I didn’t read”. This has happened countless of time. See this post? This is a full post of how I answer to the posts that you make, and do you know how much time it took me to build? A long time. It’s worthless because none of it will matter to you and your preconceived ideas.

Why should I even try at that point because truth is not what interests you and you haven’t proved to me that it was what interested you to begin with. But to show you my good faith, I will ask you one question that will then let me able to actually find the evidence that is needed for you to change your mind, the question is: What kind of evidence would you require for you to change your mind regarding brain being biologically affected by the sex that you are? 

I suspect that the answer is “nothing” and/or some flavor of “we need to control for socialization” (which is impossible, and therefore, unscientific). But please, prove me wrong. I’d be interested in a genuine conversation regarding evidences if you actually show that you can change your mind, presented with the scientific evidence that you agree would do it.

__

If you truly want links but somehow haven’t tried to look up to my blog, here you go, a tiny list from what I can find from my blog:

- https://transsexual-power.tumblr.com/post/632020443864416256/development-of-sex-differences-in-the-human-brain

- https://transsexual-power.tumblr.com/post/614059688461582336/i-thought-the-brain-sex-theory-was-disproved-it

- https://transsexual-power.tumblr.com/post/174861400294/gender-isnt-neurological-most-studies-on-brain

- https://transsexual-power.tumblr.com/post/174603725733/gillygeewhiz-every-now-and-then-i-see-a-spike (probably the best one)

- https://transsexual-power.tumblr.com/post/173402691484/why-there-almost-certainly-is-no-non-binary-brain

- https://transsexual-power.tumblr.com/post/631839244047024129/things-versus-people-gender-differences-in

- https://transsexual-power.tumblr.com/post/616732299685396480/sex-differences-in-cognitive-abilities

All of those have at least one study, sometimes several, and there’s even the brain mosaic critic. All of the time, it was in an answer from someone like you disbelieving it. Why should we try more? It is so time consuming to do this.

__

“And you imply that I’m not being logical (because woman),”

Where did I ever imply that? See, this is the second reason why I don’t even try anymore, because you people always think that when we attack arguments, we attack your persona. You can’t distinguish from your arguments (because you identify with feminism so much) with your own person. It is tiring to deal with. No I am not saying nor implying you’re illogical because you’re a woman. I’m saying you’re illogical because you are brainwashed. Everybody can be brainwashed, male and female. Everyone can have logical arguments, I am a female and I can have logical arguments, for example.

__

“All of your arguments regarding hormonal environment etc. are addressed in the sources I provided (especially the last one)”

The last one, is a book. Why should I read a whole book to answer a tumblr post from a random person? Book that will, probably, have some flavor of something that I’ve already seen a dozen time “it doesn’t control for socialization therefore it can’t be trusted” despite it being an unscientific claim, that was already used countless time by homophobic people to say that all evidences regarding the neurological differences between gay and straight people are due to “socialization”. 

Here is an example of it: https://transsexual-power.tumblr.com/post/189109733015/conference-about-homosexuality

Can you imagine? I didn’t even get to my own arguments and this post is already basically endless.

__

“The study of brain sex was conceived with the goal of finding presupposed sex differences with the aim of justifying existing biases, not finding out if differences exist, something that the sources I provided discuss at length.”

You mean like brain sex mosaic who purposely mishandled results to push an ideological point of view?

__

“You’re sexist because you don’t accept that females and males are different” is 100% verbatim a conservative talking point. Say that to a conservative Christian and they will agree with you and applaud you. It’s exactly what I was told by my fundamentalist Christian church leaders when I questioned why women were excluded from performing certain roles in the church. They told me that men and women were “different but equal” and that I had to stick to performing my role because I was born female, so I was “good at different things.”

Then there’s this. Straw man and clear manipulation tendencies to affiliate me with some political/religious group. “Because you say females and males are different, it means that you want men and women to be stuck in their gender roles and that males and females have those qualities and can’t have any nuances in an individual”. This is wrong. 

Males and females are different. That does not mean that all males and all females are the same. That does not mean that all males and all females should do/live the same way. I am a masculine female for fuck sake. What kind of weird logic would it be if I was trying to enforce specific gender roles on people considering I don’t follow them? What kind of stupid idea would it be to say that all females and all males are the same considering I am clearly on some weird place in the whole female scale?

Understanding that there are tendencies in females and males does not mean that I think all females and all males are the same. Scientific models are that, models. Some people fall out of those models. Let’s take an unpolitical example for that, imagine there’s some scientific model saying that males usually run twice a week. Does that mean that males who don’t run twice a week are not males? Does that mean that females who run twice a week are suddenly males? Does that mean that males have to run twice a week? No. It simply means that males on average run twice a week. There, you have the logic applied to males and females in regards to brains and behavior. It doesn’t go further than this. Any ideological conclusion you get from that is on you and you alone. 

Science is not made to be prescriptive, it is done to render imperfect models of reality. Descriptions of models of females and males is not a rule set so that all females and all males behave and do things according to models. Reality is a bit more complicated than this.

__

“How do you people not even realize the absolute disgusting bigotry you’re perpetuating and enabling? How do you not understand that you’re relying on the same rhetorical strategies as so-called race realists? How do you not realize that your exact arguments have been used historically to exclude women from voting, from leadership positions, from “male” hobbies and interests, from equal participation in society? You can say that you don’t want to force people into certain roles based on brain sex, that you don’t view women as inferior, just different, but the arguments you’re using have their root in sexism and were initially conceived with the purpose of excluding and suppressing women.”

Which makes this pretty ill informed and very manipulative towards your audience. You never tried to understand or conceive the way I viewed things. You simply linked it to the most awful ideology you could imagine, and then stamped it, sent it. Again, why should I lose time on posts like yours by providing researches and actual arguments from it considering that you don’t seem to have the slightest idea of how to debate your opponents and that you don’t have the slightest idea of what my arguments even are.

“This. This right here is why we need radical feminism, because as long as people support “separate but equal” rhetoric, whether it’s under the guise of conservatism or progressivism, whether it’s regarding race, sex, or any other physical category, we will never be free of bigotry in our society. “Different but equal” has failed over and over again and revealed itself to be what it is: an excuse for bigotry.”

And you conclude by a reaffirmation of your ideological views based on a straw man (as explained earlier). There is nothing more "feminist” than saying “males and females are different but they should be able to present the way they want and do the things they want”, which is my belief, and not the one of radical feminism. “Every individual should be treated fairly”, is also my belief, not radical feminism’s. There’s is nothing that has proven that my views filled bigotry in society, there are many evidences showing that the view of radical feminism has.

Finally, regarding your tags:

None of this is true. I’m neither a “trans activist”, nor want to “uphold gender roles”. I don’t want to “force” anyone to think anything, it is impossible to do. Yes it is very sexist to believe that males and females are the exact same. Regarding homophobia, I developed why the whole “socialization is what makes females and males different” is actually homophobic, just above, which also explain partly why the “socialization” hypothesis is unscientific, it’s not provable, it’s not disprovable. 

I have no idea if you will read or even try to truly think about what I said, so you see I can already smell the loss of time from this and this is exactly why I stop doing this because you guys are not interested in a genuine discussion regarding what an individual believe regarding specific subjects. 

You, on the other hand, always believe the same thing, source the same stuff, have the same tactics for argumentations. It is redundant, I don’t gain anything or any insight from it, I simply “gain” being denigrated and misrepresented, and some attention when it’s with bigger blogs. I prefer doing other things with my life.