#fiction as a tool for philosophy is useful as a hypothetical but at the end of the day thats all it is

[ultimateinferno]

You know what? No one's allowed to argue the ethics of killing villains in fiction and using it as justification for real life morality until they learn to stop using Batman & the Joker as the go to example for their position.

[trainsinanime]

Percy Jackson and Western Civilisation

Okay, I’m gonna do it. I know it’s a bad idea, but I’m gonna do it anyway, because someone has to and either nobody else is, or they’re hiding behind fandom-specific hashtags that I’m not familiar with. Basically my question is: What is up with the concept of "Western Civilisation" in the Percy Jackson books, and is it really as stupid as the first book makes it seem?

I know the correct answer is "read the rest of these Harry Potter wannabe books and find out for yourself, and then make a post about that or maybe a Youtube video essay or something", but I don’t care enough about the question to do that and I didn’t like the first book enough to want to. Also I don’t know how to make Youtube video essays. So if you think that my take is uninformed and not worth your time because of that… well, you’re probably right. That said, I think the question is still valid, and maybe this will prompt someone more knowledgable than me to make a Content™ about this or something.

To briefly sum up what this is about: In the Percy Jackson books, the ancient greek gods are real, are around, and keep having children with mortals, one of whom is our hero Percy. These kids get sent to a summer camp that is totally not Hogwarts because it’s a camp, not a school, you see. This summer camp is on Long Island, New York, USA. The gods themselves have moved to the US and live on a mystical 300th floor of the Empire State Building.

Obviously the question here is what the gods are doing there. Is this situation similar to Neil Gaiman's amazing book "American Gods", where local versions of the gods appeared because their worshippers are here? Are there versions of the gods everywhere? Turns out no, they’re just in the US. They moved here because they are bound to a mystical concept known as "the heart of western civilisation", also sometimes called "the flame". This used to be in Ancient Greece, but then moved to Rome, then around Europe for a bit and eventually settled in New York.

Depending on your point of view, you could describe this as either a neat solution, or as an intriguing piece of world building, or as what the fuck is this shit. I’m in the latter camp, if you can’t tell. Because while it seems neat and simple on the surface, it actually presupposes a lot of things and raises a lot of questions, like:

What even is western civilisation?

What languages does western civilisation speak? What alphabet does it use to write them?

Which stories and myths do all of western civilisation share?

Since western civilisation has a center, it seems logical to assume that it must also have limits; things that are not western civilisation, but something else. Which of these "something else" exist? Presumably at least one "eastern civilisation", I guess, but how many and what else?

What parts of the world are and are not part of western civilisation? For example, is the middle east part of the western civilisation? I mean, islamic tradition played a huge part in preserving ancient greek texts, and their reintroduction to Europe during the Reconquista of Spain is what triggered the Renaissance and is a big part of why we care about Ancient Greece today at all.

What, if any, are the religions of western civilisation? Apparently Greek Gods are one of them, okay. What about Christianity, what about Judaism, what about Islam?

What is the philosophy of western civilisation, if any?

It is established that Roman Gods and Greek Gods are actually identical, as the Romans claimed, even though that's historically wrong. Okay, fine, that's a choice. What about the Norse gods or those of ancient Egypt? The Romans did the same with them.

What happens with immigrants into western civilisation, and with people who were conquered by it? Are Chinese immigrants to the US part of Western Civilisation? Are Native Americans? Why or why not?

Was Rome part of Western Civilisation before they took over Ancient Greece?

When did Western Civilisation move to the US, and why then?

Again: What exactly is Western Civilisation and how do you determine where it goes next? Is it based on followers of a religion, or is it about culture, or mythology, or language? Because trying to paint a continuous line along any of these axises is at least somewhat problematic.

That’s just a small selection. I could go on, but the book doesn’t even acknowledge that these questions are real, much less try to provide any sort of answer. And from what I heard when I asked around, it seems like the later books in the series don’t either.

All these questions ultimately center around one key concept: The book assumes that there is such a thing as Western Civilisation, that it is clearly definable, and that it follows a neat line from Greece to Rome to Europe to the US. This is an assumption that is incredibly easy to poke holes into on every single level, so for me the really interesting question is really why the book even makes it at all.

I’m kidding, I know perfectly well why the book does this. This mental model of a single western civilisation that starts with ancient Greece and has found its modern form in the modern US is old and super popular. This continuinity is a story we in the western world tell ourselves. This story is the reason why most buildings in Washington DC look like greek temples. And most importantly, this version of history, or a related one that mostly just stops in Europe, is what is told in high school history books all across, well, "Western Civilisation". And, oh yes, author Rick Riordan used to be a high school history teacher.

"Western civilisation moved around a bunch and is now home in New York city" is not the start of the world building here, it appears to be the end of it. You could just as well say, "The greek gods are here because of what you read in your history text book, and you're really smart for remembering it."

I could say something about how this is problematic™ actually, because it supports the same world view that was the underpinning of Manifest Destiny, and how it supports the toxic view of American Exceptionalism. But honestly, I don’t think the book intends to do anything like that. It seems genuinely disinterested in dealing with any questions like that. Likewise, there is a hypothetical version of this where "Western civilisation" is defined by people believing they are in "Western civilisation" and perpetuating that story, which would be interesting on a meta-level (well, it would be yet another American Gods, but there's nothing wrong with that, that was an amazing book). But again, that seems deeper than Percy Jackson wants to go.

"Western civilisation" is just a tool to move the setting from a wild, scary, unimaginably remote place like… modern Greece, I guess, to the mundane, familiar, safe and kind of boring setting of modern-day New York City. Making New York City and its surroundings feel boring and mundane is definitely an unusual choice, but the book really commits to it.

(Random aside: Is there any cross-US road trip story ever where the hero travels from the west coast to the east coast?)

At least as presented in the first book, "Western Civilisation" is just a tool to make sure that the book's fictional universe does not become too interesting. And it reuses an old and popular but also clearly incomplete, problematic and in many ways just plain wrong narrative to do so, because it assumes its readers know and believe that story. It’s not the only part of the book I dislike, but it’s one that really stuck with me.

Or maybe I’m completely misinterpreting all this because I didn’t read any of the subsequent books. If you have, then please, I genuinely would like to know what you think about this!

[mendelpalace]

GamePro’s SNES Criterion Collection

Back in 2011, the now-defunct GamePro published a piece including Criterion Collection-style covers for a handful of SNES titles, along with descriptions of the hypothetical bonus materials that would come with such deluxe rereleases. Though the cover images are still floating around online, a bunch of the descriptions are probably lost, including those for games like Street Fighter II, Donkey Kong Country, U.N. Squadron, Desert Strike, and Chrono Trigger. 

A few can still be accessed via the Wayback Machine though, so I decided to repost the ones I can still get to:

An old enemy brings bounty hunter Samus Aran back to Zebes, where she discovers that the Space Pirate threat is greater than ever -- and thus begins one of the most evocative games ever made. Thanks to its simple but powerful storytelling; outstanding soundtrack; and massive, lonely world, Super Metroid, created by Nintendo's well-known R&D1; team, is a masterpiece of design that has come to represent the Super Nintendo at its pinnacle.

SPECIAL EDITION DOUBLE-DISC SET FEATURES

DISC ONE

All-new 16:9 transfer optimized for high-definition televisions

Video introduction by writer/director Yoshio Sakamoto

Two Interactive Audio Commentaries: one by Yoshio Sakamoto, Satoru Iwata, and Shigeru Miyamoto; and one by producer Makoto Kano

New Leaderboards: Test your sequence-breaking skills against the best speedrunners in the world

DISC TWO

Return to Zebes (2011): A 90-minute feature documentary on the making of the game

From Zebes to the Bottle Ship (2011): A 30 minute documentary about the history of the Metroid franchise

Deep Red: Scenes from the film that helped to inspire Super Metroid

Sequence Breaking: Noted speedrunners offer a guided tour of sequence breaking in Super Metroid

Into Tourian Base: An interactive map of Zebes with developer commentary and notes

Play the complete, original Metroid for the NES

Illustrated production history with rare behind-the-scenes photos, original press kit, and the U.S., European, and Japanese trailers

PLUS: Complete OST featuring original and remastered tracks from Super Metroid

A party of four child prodigies must band together to fend off a mysterious, malevolent alien force in this cult-classic role-playing game, scripted by influential Japanese copywriter and author, Shigesato Itoi. Ness, Paula, Jeff, and Poo embark on a fantastic adventure that spans a quirky, contemporary world, with a charming sense of lighthearted humor that shines through to the engrossing story’s awe-inspiring ending.

SPECIAL EDITION DOUBLE-DISC SET FEATURES

DISC ONE

Fully animated opening and ending cinematics from Studio Ghibli.

In-game commentary from director/producer/writer Shigesato Itoi, designer Akihiko Miura, and composers Keiichi Suzuki and Hirokazu Tanaka.

Live recording of the “Earthbound Orchestral Experience.”

Excerpts from the new translation of Saori Kumi’s Earthbound novelization, read by the author.

DISC TWO

The Man that Fell to Earthbound – Retrospective Q&A; with Shigesato Itoi about Earthbound’s critical and commercial reception.

It Hurts -- documentary feature chronicling the troubled production of Earthbound 64.

Outgrowing Onett - A short film from director Mamoru Hosoda (The Girl Who Leapt Through Time, Summer Wars) that bridges the gap between Earthbound and Mother 3.

Brand new trailer of “Mother 3DS,” the highly anticipated, “definitive” edition of Mother 3.

All-new localization effort overseen by acclaimed director and screenwriter Brad Bird (The Incredibles, The Iron Giant).

Complete HD reimagining of the original Mother.

PLUS: Concept art gallery, and interviews with the game’s development staff.

In a galaxy far, far away, join Luke Skywalker, Han Solo, Princess Leia, Chewbacca, and even Wicket the Ewok as they wage intergalactic war against the evil Empire and the sinister Sith lord, Darth Vader. In this ultimate HD edition of Super Star Wars trilogy, you’ll experience the entire saga, including racing a landspeeder through Tatooine’s wastelands in A New Hope, battling colossal AT-ATs storming Hoth’s rebel base in The Empire Strikes Back, flying the Millennium Falcon through the Death Star’s core in Return of the Jedi, and many more memorable adventures from the classic sci-fi trilogy.

SPECIAL EDITION DOUBLE-DISC SET FEATURES DISC ONE

All three Super Nintendo classics in their original form: Super Star Wars, Super Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back, and Super Star Wars: Return of the Jedi.

Remastered 16-bit visuals and crystal clear audio optimized for high-definition televisions.

New inventory management menu allows you to hang on to your weapons and powerups through all three games.

Save system lets you save your progress at any time.

New beginner-friendly “Apprentice Mode” eases newcomers into some of the most challenging Super NES games ever mad

DISC TWO

Deleted Levels: Two new playable missions previously cut from the games including R2-D2’s battle through Jabba’s palace.

A History of Sculpted Software: A 15-minute documentary chronicling the developer’s daunting task of reenvisioning George Lucas’ epic science-fiction series for the Super Nintendo.

From Giant Scorpions to Frog Dogs: An all-new 10 minute documentary examining the genesis of Super Star Wars trilogy’s most bizarre enemies.

Digital Strategy Guides: Digital versions of the original strategy guides to help you master what are considered some of the toughest video games on the Super NES.

Ladies and gentlemen: Start your engines, and prepare to challenge some of Nintendo’s most famous gaming characters in a high-speed battle of skill, wits...and luck! A huge critical and commercial success, Super Mario Kart is a seminal race-combat game from the 16-bit heyday of the early 90s that is so well loved, it continues to rank highly on “Best Game Ever” lists almost 20 years since its first release. Its key to success is its finely tuned, beautifully balanced multiplayer battle system that feels as fresh and fun as it did nearly two decades ago. Now’s your chance to rediscover the multiplayer magic of one of the best Super Nintendo games in three different forms, including an all-new Director's Cut!

SPECIAL EDITION DOUBLE-DISC SET FEATURES

DISC ONE

Director’s Cut: Featuring all-new polygonal graphics, the characters and courses are completely reimagined for a stunning, cutting-edge visual experience.

Enhanced Edition: A digitally remastered 16-bit version, with 1080p sprite-graphics taken from the original release, and authentic original gameplay

The First Cut: The completely untouched original version of the 1992 Super Nintendo release

Battle On!: Watch as the game’s original creators challenge one another in multiplayer combat and talk about their favorite weapons and characters

The Kart Legacy: A documentary on the legacy of Super Mario Kart, its numerous sequels and ports through the generations, and how it spawned an entirely new genre of racing games.

DISC TWO

Beyond F-Zero. The Making of a Two-player Racer: An in-depth interview with creator Shigeru Miyamoto about Super Mario Kart’s multiplayer design philosophies.

Unlocking Mode 7: Tadashi Sugiyama and Hideki Konno talk about the technical aspects of using Super Nintendo’s Mode 7 to deliver a great gaming experience.

Digitally remastered music by composer Soyo Oka

Bios and gameography of each Super Mario Kart character: Mario, Luigi, Princess Peach, Yoshi, Bowser, Donkey Kong Jr., Koopa Troopa, and Toad.

Cities are living, breathing things -- just as much as the inhabitants that walk their streets -- and nowhere is this more apparent than in Will Wright's masterpiece. Providing one of the earliest examples of free-form emergent gameplay, Sim City for the Super Nintendo is a seminal work, grounded in reality but limited only by the player's imagination.

SPECIAL EDITION DOUBLE-DISC SET FEATURES

DISC ONE

Two editions of the game: The original Super NES classic and SimCity+, a specially optimized widescreen edition for modern high-definition televisions.

Social Play: Connect your cities to those of your friends around the world.

Video introduction by Will Wright and Jeff Braun.

Fully voiced tutorial and advice featuring Nolan North as the voice of Dr. Wright.

DISC TWO

Af Wubbas Do (2011): A 60-minute feature documentary chronicling the history of the entire Sim series, from City through Copter to The Sims.

Urban Canvas (2011): A 30-minute exposé of the radical computer artists who use the SimCity series' landscaping and planning tools to produce works of visual art.

The Full, Uncut Raid on Bungeling Bay for Commodore 64: The game that inspired SimCity's creation.

Interactive gallery of real-life cities modeled in the game.

Original press materials and trailers.

Digital copy of "Street Music," an album featuring music from and inspired by the series.

Years ahead of its time, Actraiser was one of the most loved games released on the Super Nintendo Entertainment System. Genre-bending civilization-building simulation with side-scrolling action, the game didn’t continue as a decades-long franchise like some of its other contemporaries, but it was never forgotten. Stepping into the omnipotent shoes of “The Master” to save the land and its people from the evil Tanzra and his six lieutenants is not only many gamers’ first memory of playing a “god game,” for some it is also their fondest memory from the entire 16-bit era.

SPECIAL EDITION DOUBLE-DISC SET FEATURES

DISC ONE

All-new 16:9 remastered transfer optimized for high-definition televisions

Switch between the original 2D art assets and the all-new polygonal art with the push of a button.

Video introduction by director Masaya Hashimoto and writer Tomoyoshi Miyazaki.

Audio commentary track with the game’s designers.

DISC TWO

“The Creation Story” (2011), a forty-minute short documentary on the development of the game.

“Lightning in a Bottle” (2011), a roundtable discussion with Masaya Hashimoto, Tomoyoshi Miyazaki and Peter Molyneux about ActRaiser’s influence on game development and the “god games” genre.

The complete Yuzo Koshiro soundtrack performed by the Los Angeles Philharmonic Orchestra.

An interactive gallery of over 100 never before seen sketches, concept art, and other design documents.

All that stands between a world’s freedom and its conquest by a ruthless tyrant is the intrepid pilot Fox McCloud and his dauntless friends of the Star Fox Team. Featuring the groundbreaking technology of the Super FX chip, Star Fox brought Nintendo into the world of 3D computer graphics. And flying through the sky and in space in the Arwing starship is perhaps the best way for Nintendo to bring polygons to its consoles.

SPECIAL EDITION DOUBLE-DISC SET FEATURES DISC ONE

Remastered audio and visuals, featuring Dolby Digital EX surround sound and a 16:7, HD presentation. Game’s original 1992 audio and visuals are also on the disc.

Two audio commentaries: One from the game’s executive producer, Hiroshi Yamauchi, and producer, Shigeru Miyamoto, and another with commentary from the point of view of Andross, the game’s villain.

Updated motion-comic version of the original Star Fox comic that ran in Nintendo Power from February 1993 to December 1993.

DISC TWO

“Defenders of Corneria”: a 90-minute documentary on the making of the original Star Fox.

“Fox Through the Ages”: A look at how Fox McCloud and the series has changed since their 1992 inception.

“Arwing Declassified”: A collection of other designs considered and rejected for the iconic Arwing starship.

“The Art of Star Fox”: Images of Fox McCloud, the Star Fox Team, and the memorable worlds from the franchise.

Original promotional ads from Japan, Europe, and North America.

PLUS: The Complete Original soundtrack.

[mst3kproject]

609: The Skydivers

I kind of wanted to start out by saying something about how this is the long-awaited third installment in the Coleman Francis Trilogy of Tedium, but that doesn't work.  First of all, The Skydivers is actually Francis' middle movie, made in 1963 (The Beast of Yucca Flats was first, in 1961, and Red Zone Cuba third, in 1966).  Second, that would make me sound like an Argento fan waiting twenty-seven years for The Third Mother, when actually my reaction to seeing The Skydivers pop up in my randomizer was “oh, right.  There's another fucking Coleman Francis movie.”

Like its two sisters, The Skydivers is a bleak and disjointed experience.  A married couple, Harry and Beth, run a skydiving school.  Harry is having an affair with a woman named Suzy (if the name of her boat is anything to go by, the 'z' is supposed to be backwards).  Beth retaliates by almost having an affair with Joe, the airfield's new mechanic.  Joe was hired to replace Franky, who was fired for being drunk and now wants revenge on his former employer.  When Harry spurns Suzy, she and Franky sabotage his parachute, and Harry goes splat.  Suzy and Franky are gunned down by the FAA(?!).  Beth feels guilty and breaks up with Joe before leaving the skydiving school to do something else that probably won't involve airplanes.  Crow gets destroyed a lot, and I conclude that people whose names end in 'y' probably shouldn't get involved with skydiving.

If anyone's interested, there is at least one recorded case of a skydiver being murdered by sabotaging his parachute, that of Steve Hilder in 2003.  The saboteur was never found and the case remains unsolved.

As for the movie itself, there's very little in The Skydivers that would be of interest to... anybody, really.  The movie is dull and badly-lit, featuring boring people in awkward situations.  About the only thing that really caught my attention at any point was the fact that there is some actual footage of skydiving, although you can never see the jumpers' faces up close and I suspect Coleman Francis borrowed it from some other film ('parachuting' footage featuring recognizable characters appears to involve actors hanging from the rafters by a backpack, which I can only imagine as being terribly uncomfortable).  The closest thing to a theme I can find in this celluloid coma is the idea of thrill-seeking. Various characters search for a way to brighten up their colourless lives, and end up suffering for it.

The character Pete seeks thrills by skydiving – he claims it's the only thing that makes him feel alive and free, and he tries ever more dangerous stunts until finally he is unable to pull his parachute cord and falls to his death.  In terms of the actual plot, however, Pete's fate serves no purpose except to ensure the FAA are on hand to witness Harry's murder later.  It seems to have inspired Suzy's revenge plot, but sabotaging a skydiver's parachute is such an obvious idea that this wouldn't be necessary.  His death feels ultimately pointless, not even Grist for the Wheels of Progress.

Harry and Beth each seek a thrill in the form of an illicit affair, but the results are very different because their partners respond differently to their ultimate rejections.  Joe respects Beth enough to accept her rejection, not once but twice: when she initially tells him this can go no further and they must be content to be friends, he accepts it with grace.  At the end, when she tells him she can't stay at the skydiving school, he accepts that too, even though it means he will probably never see her again.

Suzy, on the other hand, has no respect for anybody, even as she expects other people to respect her – witness how she attacks Harry when he calls her a 'broad'.  She was spoiled as a child, and never learned to see other people as anything but a way to get what she wants.  When she can no longer get the sexual excitement she wants from Harry, she kills him.  Franky is nothing but a tool she uses to exact this revenge.  Beth, who has nothing to offer, means nothing to her.

I guess it's mildly noteworthy that The Skydivers is the only Coleman Francis movie in which more than one woman has lines.  In The Beast of Yucca Flats the only woman who talked was the mother of the vacation family, and she didn't have a whole lot to say.  In Red Zone Cuba I think Chastain's wife had a line or two, but I can't remember a word of them.  In The Skydivers, both Beth and Suzy have a fair amount of actual dialogue, and manifest distinctly different personalities.  They are stereotypes, being the 'femmy fattily' and the long-suffering wife, but they make decisions as individuals rather than as 'women', with comprehensible reasons for doing so.  So, uh, that makes Coleman Francis better at writing women than Tommy Wiseau, I guess.

I feel like the universe owes me a cookie for putting me in a position to write that sentence.

I really don't think the consequences of thrill-seeking are the point of the movie, though – the fates of Harry and Beth have more to do with their partners than with the actual illicit sex, and Pete's death seems far too pointless.  The whole movie seems pointless, really – as Beth leaves the airfield at the end, we have no idea why we were just told that story, and what, if anything, we were supposed to take from it.  That seems to be a theme of Coleman Francis movies in general: nobody gets a happy ending and when all's said and done there's no point to any of it.

Consider The Beast of Yucca Flats.  At the end the monster is dead, but a family has perhaps been destroyed.  Or Red Zone Cuba. The villains don't get what they want, but neither do the good guys, and a half dozen other lives have been ruined along the way.  Life is nothing but a series of misfortunes.  Happiness is fleeting when it appears at all, and death is neither release nor justice, it is merely death.  The bare, inhospitable landscapes of the American southwest where Francis filmed seem to underscore the idea: the world is not an inviting place, and does not differentiate between the guilty and the innocent.  All of us, sinners and saints, are equally likely to be gunned down by a guy in a plane for no goddamn reason.

This is where we start to see glimmers of a personal philosophy through the cracks of these movies.  Coleman Francis' work suggests he believed that humans and our institutions are all basically chaotic neutral, doing whatever will benefit us at the moment without much thought for how it affects those around us.  Even Beth, when she rejects Joe's advances, does so for selfish reasons: she believes she will be happier as Harry's wife than Joe's mistress.  'Justice' is arbitrary and cruel.  Doing evil rarely avails us anything, but neither does doing good, and at the end of the day we're all just brief candles in the void.  This is a really depressing way to live your life and makes for some really depressing movies, and I doubt Francis actually thought like this.  Rather, I think he made this kind of movie because he thought that's what important movies should be.

Our entertainment culture seems to believe that tragedy is somehow 'more important' than comedy.  Quick, name three Shakespeare plays! I bet two of them were Hamlet and Romeo and Juliet, right?  Even if those aren't the ones you came up with, I bet at least two, if not all three, were tragedies.  Shakespeare wrote nearly twice as many comedies as he did tragedies (eighteen to ten, by most scholars' counts), but it's his tragedies that are endlessly studied and analyzed, that attract big-name actors and win awards to this day, because they're considered more meaningful than the lighthearted comedies.

This is strange, because comedy is important, too.  I think Dustin Hoffman's character in Stranger than Fiction had the best explanation of why: it is by affirming the continuance of life (comedy) that we deal with the unavoidable certainty of death (tragedy).  The ancient Greeks knew this, and would finish up an afternoon of tragedies with a comedic performance called a Satyr Play, so that the audience wouldn't leave the theatre depressed.  Shakespeare knew it, too.  Even Hamlet has jokes, and Horatio is left at the end (continuance of life) to pass on the moral of the story (don't wander around making long-winded speeches like Hamlet – get off your butt and overthrow your evil uncle the way your father's ghost told you to... like Simba!)

Stories can accomplish a lot of things.  They teach us to deal with hypothetical situations and our own emotions, give us information about places we've never been and people we've never met.  One thing that they really shouldn't do, however, is make us feel terrible for no reason, but that's exactly what Coleman Francis' movies do.  That's what you get when people are taught that tragedy is somehow meaningful just because it's tragic.  It might be sad, but unless it has characters we identify with and situations that are somehow significant, it's still not good.

If you haven't seen Stranger than Fiction, you're missing out.  It's a very funny movie about coping with one's own mortality and might just make you cry over the death of Will Ferrell.  If you haven't seen The Skydivers... you're good.  Don't bother.