#from recent chapter on naver

[hyusolk]

lord have mercy oh my goodness what the hell

[blog-name-idk]

The Plot Twist | 03

Written by @blog-name-idk and @eserethriddle

Summary: Once upon a time you would have jumped at the chance to live the idol girlfriend life. The cameras, the action, the whirlwind romance. But what was once a dream has now become your worst nightmare, and you fully intend to fight the universe as it repeatedly conspires to set you up with your seven perfectly good soulmates from Bangtan Sonyeondan.

In which we punt Y/N into all the fanfiction tropes and you do your feral best to subvert the love story.

Because nani the fuck, you are The Plot Twist.

Pairing: OT7 X Fem!Reader

Genre: Soulmate!AU, crack, humor, idol!AU, light angst, slow burn, romantic comedy, just a fun silly old time

Rating: 18+

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Chapter 3: "I'm moving out."

You've never been a hypochondriac. Each time something strange and new occurred over the past week, you simply normalized it and moved on. But seven sevens mysteriously appearing on your skin the morning after your fever spell were admittedly too much, too eerie.

Something was definitely up.

So you went to the all-seer, the earthly keeper of scientific knowledge, the only place that could tell you what the hell was going on with concrete authority: NaverMD.

But then even you and NaverMD were stumped. Feeding your symptoms into the search engine reported a limited consensus of only two diagnoses. Dr. Naver, MD concluded that you either had a soulmate, or some extremely rare, spontaneous condition in which all your toenails will fall off and cause your eventual and sudden death.

Well, actually, no, the first diagnosis was cancer. But it always is, even when you're just constipated from too many snacks and too little fiber, so you discarded that one immediately.

Despite yourself, you found yourself leaning towards the worse of the two. Because somehow even the prospect of a bizarre, yet-unproven disease still seemed more believable than you having a soulmate.

And then you made your first mistake.

Oh, how simple life had been. You were just a wee child, trying to narrow down your suspicions, so young and naive. You never stopped to realize that some things were better left unknown, uncharted.

Like some theological figures before you, you couldn't resist the forbidden fruit of knowledge. Too drawn by the serpentine lure of instant internet search results, you plugged "7 tattoo" into Naver. And now you must live with your decision.

Because smoldering at you from behind your suddenly hateable phone screen are seven men widely considered to be amongst Korea's national treasures.

The thus-far revealed tattoo locations match some of yours, and you try to stave away the sinking feeling that the remaining others are just as accurate. Because that would mean…

…That would mean…

You have a soulmate. Soulmates.

Seven soulmates… who happen to be Bangtan Seonyeondan.

And that’s the moment your mind breaks.

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It's fine. You're fine. You are handling recent revelations with utmost grace and dignity.

Or at least you are sticking your pinky up as you completely obliterate a tub of ice cream in panic. It takes all the poise you can muster. Understandably. And then you almost throw up all that processed dairy back up, your stomach churning too much for you to punish it with cookies and cream like your usual comfort mechanism.

Why is this happening? Why you? You're not some chosen one, and you've never wanted to be the main character in some lame k-drama or fanfiction.

Maybe this is a weird prank your mother concocted to punish you for completely ignoring her texts and forgetting your "obligations" – i.e. popping out grandchildren for her to coo over. And that, to her well-meaning if conservative outlook, requires a well-established partnership and romance at the minimum. Your father must have let slip that you've skipped all of the group dating events she's been spamming your family group-chat with.

Your caring, loving, ruthless mother has picked your worst nightmare and brought it to reality, all to teach you a lesson. To try to ensure that you find love before you reach hagdom at thirty and must be sent to live shrouded in the woods, away from decent, beautiful society. (Her words, despite the fact that she herself is quite a ways past that age. Not that you would ever point that out. You value your life.)

The thought calms you, and you decide to vacuum the feathers from the pillows you destroyed in a fit of rage and madness. You needed to buy new throw pillows, anyway.

The loud drone of the vacuum soothes you further. Of course, having more than one soulmate is possible, but extremely unlikely. Having seven? Who happen to be the some of the most famous people in the world? That is as statistically likely as you winning the lottery seven times in a row. Probably less, actually.

Pfft! Soulmates? Hah! Nice try, eomma.

You have to hand it to her, she really had you going there for a second. You chuckle to yourself as you turn off the vacuum and go to empty it in the trash. Noticing your kitchen trash is full, you tie it off and carry it downstairs to the garbage room.

You feel oddly pensive as you carry the bag down. Perhaps something about the odor of the two-day old kimchi jjigae leftovers emanating from the plastic is addling your brain, because despite your rationalization you now can't stop thinking about the concept of soulmates.

It seems like there's so much that goes into a partnership, even with pre-destined compatibility. Sure, your parents are soulmates and love each other very much, but that doesn't mean their marriage is perfect. The equilibrium, the joy, the easy comfort they find in each other now is the result of many years of growing both together and apart, of being their own individuals who have learned to fit into each other like puzzle pieces.

They are soulmates, but their happiness wasn't fated. Perhaps the universe contrived for them to meet, but their bond was forged by their own hands. They chose each other.

You can't imagine ever giving someone the keys to your heart and trusting them not to disappoint you.

Or trusting yourself not to disappoint them.

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On your way back to your floor, you’re surprised to see your landlord with a guest when you step into the building elevator.

“Oh, great timing! Say hello, this young man moving in at 8004, right next to you,” your landlord says.

Your new neighbor is decked out in a bucket hat and oversized sweater ensemble. You see the moon tattoo peeking out from the back of his sweater and gulp.

That… That can’t be Park Jimin… right?

A split second, and that’s when everything you have been avoiding clicks with the finality of a key turning in a lock.

The call with Mijin, the anomalies you’d experienced, the comical twist of your recent everyday life.

It wasn't a prank.

And despite all the very real and terrifying things your mother is capable of, surely this coincidence is beyond even her ability to machinate. Which can only mean one thing.

You do have soulmates, and the universe has begun plotting.

But you… you refuse to do this. You’re not a little girl that the world can tell to spin in her skirt and flutter her lashes. There are things worth fighting against, and these things are love and the eventual disappointment of finding out that the person you adored is fallible and rife with flaws. All the more so when it's an idol with a perfect shiny image to uphold.

Despite your earlier post-Naver meltdown, you now find yourself strangely calm. This is a do-or-die situation, and you have never been one to go down without a fight. Your will shall not be bent, no matter what anyone says about "fate."

You realize your new neighbor is peering at you curiously, and you staunchly avoid his gaze. Your hair falls in front of your face like you're Sadako from The Ring, because you don't want him to remember any identifying features. Your landlord looks confused at your silence, but says nothing, and an awkward silence envelops the cramped confines of the elevator.

When the elevator finally, finally dings open, you refuse to wait and walk with your companions like a normal person. To both your landlord and your – ugh – soulmate's shock, you power walk out of there like you're an ahjumma heading to the store on discount day. When you finally make it to your once-safe haven, your now forsaken sanctuary, you slam the door behind you.

With your heart thundering in your chest, you look in the mirror and take in frantic breaths.

You decide once and for all.

“Let’s not fall in love,” you tell yourself, the promising ferocity in your eyes a hand-me-down from your mother.

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Today is a good day, thinks Kim Jaehyung. The sun is shining, his wife is making his favorite oxtail soup for dinner, and he's finally managed to rent out the last vacant unit in his building. The new tenant is polite and, more importantly, has paid the entire lease up front without even needing any bank loans.

The only blip is his other tenant's odd behavior in the elevator, and the way you practically fled into your apartment. The new renter is a handsome young man – Jaehyung would have thought that a pretty girl about his age would have been happy to show him the ins and outs of the building. Though perhaps you needed to go to the bathroom – he's certainly had those moments.

"She's my neighbor?" the man asks, sounding curious, his gaze following the way you speed walk away from them.

"Yes! Right next door," Jaehyung replies, trying to remember the new tenant's name. He had just looked at the lease agreement, too! "She's normally very accommodating, so I'm sure the two of you will get along well."

As if to mock his statement, your door slams shut behind you. With a shrug, Jaehyung leads the renter – Park! That was it! Tenant Park! – to the door next to yours.

After showing Park-ssi his new apartment and handing him the keys, Jaehyung is in the elevator when his phone buzzes in his pocket.

You I'm moving out

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You're exhausted. You might have told your landlord you were moving, but finding a new place within your budget that doesn't come with charming qualities like decorative mold or live-in, six-legged pets is proving difficult on such short notice.

Why isn't Park Jimin of fucking BTS living in one of the more expensive areas of Seoul, anyway? Why would someone that rich and famous choose your cozy, decent little building? He's gentrifying your already gentrified neighborhood! You're too accustomed to the luxuries of upper-middle class life to be happy about being forced out.

So you've taken to leaving home absurdly early and working until late, in hopes of avoiding any run-ins with your soulmate neighbor.

Despite your best efforts, you have somehow managed to end up alone in the elevator with Jimin. You were already inside, and he was running for the door looking so frazzled you didn't have the heart to press the close button on him. Curse the universe for taking advantage of your kind heart and gentle, amiable nature.

"Thank you," Jimin gasps, clearly out of breath. A bead of sweat trickles down from his temple, which you definitely do not notice. "I forgot my wallet."

He takes off his mask to breathe more easily, and you try to look anywhere but at his plump lips and the way his eyes squish when he smiles at you. The universe may have all manner of nefarious powers at its beck and call, but that smile might be the deadliest weapon of all.

"No problem," you mutter, hoping he never sees you again and yet also wishing you had used more eye cream today. Thankfully, the elevator is fast, but as the door dings open somehow Jimin keeps pace with you.

"We didn't get a chance to formally meet," he says cheerfully, somehow keeping stride with you despite your best efforts to break the world record for fastest casual walk. "I'm Jimin. What's your name?"

The simple, completely normal question makes you panic. You've reached your door and you gaze longingly at the handle, dreaming of the safety that beckons on the other side. So near, but so far.

You unlock it, and realize he's paused next to you, awaiting your response. That violently sweet smile is still on his face, and you find yourself staring dazedly at him for a moment before snapping out of it.

You need to exit this situation. Immediately.

You open the door and look him dead in the eye. "I don't talk to strangers."

Swiftly stepping inside, you close the door firmly behind you and try not to dwell on the fact that he is just as beautiful with his mouth hanging open.

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Jimin stares in shock at the closed door in front of him, wondering what on earth he did wrong. He just wants to be on friendly terms with his neighbors – well, especially the pretty one – but you seem to be avoiding him like the plague.

Maybe you're shy? Or slow to trust? Jimin doesn't think he's been doing anything threatening or overly familiar – certainly nothing to warrant the way you almost flee whenever you see him.

Then again, he's not a single (well, not that he knows whether you're single or not, but you seem to live alone, and haven't had any visitors of any gender despite being quite attractive, not that he's spent that much time thinking about whether or not you are single or anything) young woman living alone, so perhaps his judgment is biased.

Maybe he just needs to try harder! Show you that he really does have good intentions. Or would that be creepy?

It's been so long since anyone has treated him like this – just a regular, pesky person – that he can't help but be endeared.

And intrigued.

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These days even the temporary security personnel know your name. They know to expect you putting in overtime, but for today’s working hours you’ve completely outdone yourself.

It's late. Late enough that even for a workaholic Korean, you're the last one out of the office. You begin to make the trek to the train station, grabbing your keys from your oversized purse in case any weirdos try to follow you. Though then again, your bag itself could probably be a decent weapon – your building was updating and refreshing all of the first-aid stations, and so you have a bulky, metal kit weighing you down.

It would be kind of funny, actually, if you were able to injure someone with a first-aid kit. Something, something, irony.

You smile, mildly amused at the thought, but it quickly fades when you see a figure slumped on a bench at the bus stop. It looks to be a man, dressed in torn clothing, and when he shifts you see bruises littering his skin. His hair and eyes are hidden by the brim of a black baseball cap, and his features are otherwise also covered by a black mask, and you wonder if his face is also in bad shape.

You make your way closer, the kit weighing heavily in your purse, because you're an idiot who can't leave well enough alone.

"Do you need help?" you ask carefully, standing just slightly far away in case this is a violent person who's going to lunge at you. The man looks up in surprise, and you feel your lunch try to make a resurgence.

Because staring back at you with a black eye is Min Yoongi of BTS.

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Yoongi exhales and slumps forward on the bench outside the photoshoot location, wondering why he's been feeling so off lately. It's not quite the same as the depression slumps he's used to – rather than numbness, it just feels like something is missing.

The only time the feeling recedes is at night, when the ghost of that strange lullaby whispers at the edges of his mind. Yoongi's put the basic melody to paper, but he can't get it quite right. Every time he tries, it's like some note eludes him, flitting out of reach just before he can grasp them.

"Do you need help?"

Yoongi almost jumps before looking up to see a prim, well-dressed woman gazing at him in a mixture of suspicion and concern. Your eyes widen at his face, and he can register the exact moment you realize who he is.

Fuck.

You look horrified, which is not the expression he's used to seeing from fans. You take a step back, half turning as if to run. Also not something that typically happens.

Yoongi should leave, return to the photoshoot, find his manager and tell him he's been spotted in case damage control is needed. Instead he finds himself strangely spellbound, staring as your jaw clenches and your eyes close. You set your shoulders as if steeling yourself for war and turn back to him.

You reach into your purse and he tenses, ready to hide his face for when you inevitably pull out your phone to try to take a picture of him with fake bruises all over his face.

To his utter bemusement, instead of a phone, you pull out a metallic-looking case and toss it at him without warning. Yoongi is too taken aback to do anything other than watch it clatter to the ground.

"What the–" he begins, but you whip back around before he can finish and take off as fast as your heels allow. "...Fuck?"

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As far as obnoxious things the universe has thrown at you go, this one isn't so bad.

That's what you tell yourself as you stare at the very shiny, very pointy looking knife being brandished in your face in the alley you use as a shortcut home.

At least it's not a soulmate.

"There's no one here to rescue you, little girl," this apparent mugger gloats, and for a moment you actually feel a little flattered. Little girl? Really? At twenty-five? That's downright polite, honestly.

"Huh? Is everything okay back there?" calls a strangely familiar voice, making the both of you freeze. Thanks to your recent frantic googling and research, you recognize it surprisingly quickly, and you gasp and look your assailant dead in the eye.

"Kill me. Right now," you order, your voice leaving no room for argument. The maniacal glint leaves your attacker's gaze and he stares at you in confusion. And perhaps a little fear.

"Uh, what?"

"Fucking do it, bitch," you hiss, casting your gaze frantically behind him to see if the owner of the voice is coming to investigate. You point at your chest, where you assume your heart probably is. If you have one. "Right here."

"What the fuck, no, I just want your money?" he says in bewildered tones, beginning to back away from you. You hear footsteps from behind him, and panic begins to set in.

"DID I FUCKING STUTTER?" you screech, wanting your attacker to just hurry the fuck up already. Seriously if he wasn't prepared to stab someone why the hell is he waving around a knife? What a little bitch. This is the problem with youth these days – all talk and no follow-through.

"You know what, fuck it, just go," the guy finally says, dropping the knife to the floor. "This is too much for me. I should have just gone to trade school like my mom wanted."

"Whatever dude," you say with a shrug, taking the opportunity to gear up and sprint out of the alley. You pass a confused looking Kim Taehyung, and pat yourself on the back for avoiding another contrived situation the universe tried to force onto you. It can take its cosmic intervention theory and shove it up its black hole where the stars don't shine.

Unfortunately you don't realize that to Taehyung, time slows as you run by. The scent of your hair, the silhouette of your lips… he is utterly captivated. He can't help but to peek into the alley to see where you were coming from, and is surprised to see a masked man just standing there, staring blankly at the ground. Metal glints, and he's shocked to realize that it's not the ground that has drawn the man's attention, but a knife.

"Yeah, I'm not cut off for this," he hears the guy mumble as he kneels down to pick up the weapon. Taehyung tenses, unsure of what to do, only for the man to toss it into a dumpster. "I… I should go apologize to mom."

Had this man tried to attack that girl? Taehyung's fist clenches at the thought, an uncharacteristic flare of anger lighting his chest. Then it relaxes as it dawns on him that you must have talked the man down. Not just talk him down, but give up on his supposed path of crime entirely.

So not just beautiful, but intelligent too. Empathetic. You probably love animals, because he can already tell you're perfect.

For days after, he can't get the strange girl out of his head, or the smell of your flowery shampoo out of his nose.

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You should have known. You should have fucking known.

"Eomma," you say carefully, lest you invite another scolding from your mother that leaves you equal parts guilty and offended. "This is a very strange place for auntie's birthday."

She purses her lips, managing to look simultaneously irritated with you and pleased with herself, and shoves you forward.

You sigh, resigned, and begin to walk inside the building with slumped shoulders, heels clicking morosely beneath your feet. Until the very pointed throat clearing behind you automatically straightens your spine in a lecture-induced response you have never been able to shake.

"Are you here for the dating event?" chirps the far-too-chipper woman at the front desk, face brightening at the appearance of such a lovely attendee. You force a smile in response, glancing over your shoulder to see that yes, your mother is still watching outside with her arms crossed.

You send her a wave that just makes her tap her foot impatiently. With a sigh, you turn around and nod.

"Yes," you respond with all the joy of a human sacrifice walking to their doom. "I guess I am."

The employee beams at you and pushes forward a form for you to fill out. When you check the box indicating that you indeed have been experiencing soulmate phenomena, because you're an idiot who can't lie even to save yourself, her smile grows even wider.

"It's so great that you're taking initiative," she gushes, oblivious to the way you are now grinding your teeth. "Some people think cosmic intervention will take care of everything, and never end up meeting their soulmate!"

God, goddesses, saints and shamans, whoever the fuck, you think silently. That is literally all I want.

For a moment the image of two spinsters laughing at your pain flashes through your mind, but it's gone before you can really register what happened. What you do notice is that your mother has left.

"Oops, I think I left my ID in my car," you say with a smile suddenly much more genuine than before. "I'll be right back."

The poor, unsuspecting attendant just nods, and you're out the door and around the corner just as a black Palisade rolls up to the building.

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The store owner blinks in surprise at your appearance. It's broad daylight, and most of his customers are kids and teenagers. Grown adults don't tend to come here, other than the idol who thinks he's sneaky and the tired salarywoman who –

"Hey, Lee-ssi!" you greet cheerfully, sliding your game card out of your dainty purse. "Is there a new score for me to beat today?"

Lee Seungwon blinks again. You're wearing a sleek maroon dress that ends right above your knees, your hair is coiffed, you smell like a field of flowers instead of burnt coffee, and your face is powdered to perfection.

"[L/N]-ssi?" he asks tentatively. It looks like you. It sounds like you. But he wants to make sure, because you look far too perky for someone dressed like they're supposed to be on a date.

"Yes?" you reply, looking just as confused as he feels. "Is something wrong?"

"Er, no," he replies, accepting the game card from your manicured hand. "The usual? 2,000W?"

You grin and nod, prancing off to the Pacman machine with a bounce to your step.

Seungwon feels a strange sense of foreboding.

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Seokjin is the best hyung. Obviously. He's handsome, he's funny, he cooks, he takes care of his brothers, and even drives them to speed-dating events that are objectively a terrible idea.

In fact, he's such a great hyung that instead of returning immediately home, he deserves a little bit of fun. So he heads to a familiar little establishment. Seokjin's managed to re-establish his place as number one in Pacman, but it can't hurt to fill up the leaderboard even more and show that immature punk who's boss.

The fact that he is a grown man in a silent war with a child over an arcade game wooshes gently over his fluffy hair.

Lee-ssi's eyes widen in surprise when Jin walks in, and the idol follows the dart of the elderly man's gaze to see a maroon dress and a very shapely backside. He stifles a sigh when he realizes it is parked right in front of the Pacman machine, and that he likely can't even ask the woman to hurry up lest she recognize him.

Then he realizes that she is inputting a name on the high score screen.

Right above his.

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Masterlist | Next

[remy911]

Just popping back up to say I've updated the Male Yandere List - Manga and Anime Edition to include a new addition:

Dreaming Freedom

How can I describe this? As a yandere fan, I feel very well fed!!

You can read it officially on Naver's Webtoon. While the website has only 5 chapters, there are more chapters available on their app (currently to c93). That said, Webtoon has a 1 free chapter a day restriction if you're only reading free chapters. (Not personally a fan of "app-walling" but that's besides the point...)

The story starts out with our heroine being bullied. I personally don't enjoy stories with bullying plots so I actually dropped this story a long time ago, but I decided to pick it up again recently because I read a comment somewhere where they said there was a yandere in this. And oh, boy, did it ever deliver.

If you're not a fan of bullying plots like me, the story does go beyond it and I really grew to like the dynamics of the character interactions.

The heroine went from relying on anything she could find, including the male love interest, to really standing on her own.

The yandere, on the other hand, ends up revolving his entire life around the heroine. The things that previously made him angry or sad didn't matter as much, just so long as he had her. He's so clingy!!

SPOILERS below the cut to the things he would do:

He would injure himself and cry so that she would pay attention to him. Beat up guys who would harass her. Delete messages from guys he felt were a threat. He would even outright say he would die if she left.

[lgcmanager]

NOVA IUVENTA 002 (CHAPTER 1: AMARE)

SCHEDULE TYPE: VARIABLE GIG SCHEDULE RESTRICTIONS: see below

( this is a special reward for the requirements’ 100% completion rate, which is a first in the roleplay for a drama ! congratulations and thank you to all the participants ! )

while legacy entertainement never doubted that NOVA's debut would be a success, the mini-drama CHAPTER 1: AMARE, has reached a level of success unexpected by the company. indeed, with 3 episodes out so far, it has become viral with the 12 to 35 years old. as such, legacy has decided to capitalize on this opportunity.

NOVA MEMBERS

as the girls will already be busy promoting their debut mini-album, the members of nova will not receive additional requirements in this post. however, they are rewarded 12 NOTORIETY and can use this post on points sheet as proof.

MALE ACTORS  

just like the NOVA girls, the male actors in CHAPTER 1: AMARE, are receiving love calls. firstly, the boys will be filming a REACTION series for NAVER, during which they will be watching the mini-drama, sharing their thoughts and behind the scenes stories concerning the episode they are reacting to. these videos will be filmed during the week of JULY 3.

EPISODE 1: LEE HYUNSOO & HAN NOEUL

EPISODE 2: ZHENG LEO & CHO MINKYU

EPISODE 3: CHO MINKYU & KIM JINHYUK

EPISODE 4: LEE HYUNSOO & ZHENG LEO

on JULY 11, the FIVE boys will then have a photohoot and interview for the AUGUST issue of ESQUIRE magazine. since the buzz words associated them are YOUNG LOVE, this will be the theme of their issue. they will be ask questions that they will have to answer in front of the camera. example of questions asked:

mbti

share a recent tmi

favorite color

favorite food

personal talent

personal fashion style

What do they want to achieve

what they do to relax

how do they differ from their character in the mini-drama

how do they ressemble their character in the mini-drama

last but not least, all the boys will reunite on screen in AN EPISODE OF BANANA DIVISION (temporary title). please keep an eye on the drama's official mision for more information.

REQUIREMENTS

REACTION: with your assigned partner, either write a 4 replies (minimum 8 lines) thread reacting to the episode OR continue a nova iuventa thread (additional 4 replies between now and SEPTEMBER 23) from the previous trimester for +8 POINTS TO DISTRIBUTE ANYWHERE and +3 NOTORIETY ! ** can be done twice by CHO MINKYU, LEE HYUNSOO and ZHENG LEO since they have 2 partners **

INTERVIEW: write a 300+ word solo where your muse does the interview for +6 POINTS TO DISTRIBUTE ANYWHERE and +6 NOTORIETY !

make sure to use the hashtag lgc:novaiuventa  for everything pertaining to this mission. you have until SEPTEMBER 23, 2023 at 11:59PM EDT to complete the requirements and validate your points. please submit the following form ONCE on the points blog:

TITLE: MUSE NAME ∙ NOVA IUVENTA 002 - REACTION: +8 ( skill points distribution ), +3 notoriety [ LINK ] ** can be claimed twice by CHO MINKYU, LEE HYUNSOO and ZHENG LEO** - INTERVIEW: +6 ( skill points distribution ), +6 notoriety [ LINK ]

[imbouttasue]

Where are you reading the recent chapters from?

You can read them on Naver !! Most of the chapters I post are merely from the free parts & spoilers.

[kaoarika]

Remembering once again about Favorite Part.

I still wanna be able to be read it fully in English or Spanish, I’m still a little “eh” about how the climax arc went down, but, boy, oh boy, am I ever glad that the author did provide two bonus chapters for it. And luckily enough, they are still free...? to read since they are from Naver Webtoon’s anthologies (which are usually free to read).

One is more a bonus extra and the other offers a conclusion (although, lmao, still not fully into it because reasons) to the lingering fate of the antagonist of that climax arc.

Did I want something better about them? Yeah. Completely. Like, on one hand, I was “okay, Woojoo and Hanbyeol still being a couple in the close future and MIGHT be thinking in marriage” is good and all, “heck yeah, Minwoo can now return to SK because the antagonist is now in jail” was also that I kinda wanted to see as some kind of epilogue in the original series, almost 3 years ago. But... still kinda wanted something more.

I know the author seems to have fully moved on in her more recent series (so much, that the extra chapter in ANOTHER recent webtoon anthology, was from this series... I know you don’t want to get pigeonholed into your old series and all that, but I do miss these characters a LOT, and the fact that the author barely has a presence online, you, as the viewer, don’t have any opportunity to see them again, again. You know? Even if these are bonus material or fanart of your own concluded series (in fact, I have TRIED looking for fanart of this series, but not good results about it, there’s BARELY).

I still want justice for that one kiss, ma’am. The fact that these two dum-dums are thinking in possible marriage is good and all, but I wanted a better kiss on-screen? Or more shenaningans about them, especially after EVERYTHING they went through in the last two arcs? I wanted my “slow burn normal life as a couple” arc, lmao

And sure, Minwoo. Minwoo deserved better after his redemption arc of sorts (”I’m not doing it for you, I’m doing it for Hanbyeol” was his stellar moment  during the climax after MANY mistakes he did in the way). I think the extra chapter about him was nice, and I got satisfaction on knowing his stalker was brought to justice... but I kinda want to know HOW about this, and how he fully adapted into his life overseas (and him being total bros with Hanbyeol is comedy gold... although I could tell this was something she probably drew before she started serialization with her other series and its events are in a more nebulous canon time).

(I’m also thinking about what happened to that drama or movie project they were planning to do, like I know Annarasumanara, which was a little on development hell, finally got its time to shine... and while I’m still iffy on HOW they are going to handle Woojoo’s character or Hanbyeol’s losing weight... I am 50/50 they could improve some aspects of the webtoon’s narrative).

[sirsirgirl]

Why I believe the "harem ending" is unlikely to happen (Men of the Harem theory) - PART I

Disclaimer 1: What I mean by "Harem ending" is an escenario in which Latil stays with all her consorts instead of choosing just one.

Disclaimer 2: This post will contain spoilers from the novel.

Disclaimer 3: Please, take everything with a grain of salt. Although, I'll try to be as objective as possible, this is only my own interpretation of the story.

******

Let's start with some unavoidable facts.

1. All roads lead to... GUKSEO!

If you've been following the novel from the beginning, you might be aware of these two things.

- Latil established a harem to secure power. If you jumped the first chapters of the novel (as I did the first time), you might think the main purpose of having a harem was to take revenge on Hyacinth. Nope! In reality, Latil's first reason was to avoid her power and influence to be split over with a Prince consort too soon.

- Latil knew she will eventually have to choose a "real husband". Yup, that's right, even in fantasy, royalty cannot avoid the issues of the imperial family lineage. Although, her harem might act as an effective shield from the ministers concern about a successor, Latil knew questions about the royal heir and the imperial family will come back in the future, she just wasn't emotionally ready to think about that early on.

Yeah, I know some of you never lost sight of this, but looking at the comments on Naver, seems like a lot of us did. For better or for worse, chapter 585 *cough, cough* brought our feet back to the ground. Whether we like it or not, the Gukseo arc has been reopened, and my gut feeling is telling me that it will not be too long until Latil makes her choice.

Maybe now you're thinking "so, what's the problem with that? Latil can choose a Gukseo and still live happily with her harem, right? RIGHT????"

Well, not so fast, you innocent kind-hearted child, because...

2. Choosing a Gukseo will set concubines apart... Like, REALLY!

Instead of calling them "unavoidable facts", I might as well have called them "hard truths". But yeah, this is something I actually wanted to comment on a few weeks ago, and I believe the recent chapters are lowkey anticipating it.

At first, I thought only Ranamun and Guesta were particularly interested in becoming the Royal Consort. You know, Guesta is the son of Prime Minister Rhodes, and Ranamun is the son of Duke Atraxil. As their parents were political opponents, it was only natural for them to aim for such a privileged position to gain power and recognition in their political parties. However, as the story progressed, other concubines developed their own personal reasons to aim for the same. Let's see:

- Tasir: I think it's fair to accept he's been the most helpful consort along the story. If we are talking about ability, he would be the smartest choice for an imperial position. But is not like he has no pressure to become Gukseo. Although his personal reason to apply as a concubine was to investigate the death of the former Emperor, the official reason for his application was to gain a noble title for his family. We know he's the least dramatic concubine, but can he remain calm if he's rejected when he's perfectly aware of his contributions, and he knows what's at stake for his family? I'm not sure.

- Clein: We're gradually starting to see his ambitions. He might not be the most brilliant consort, but we already know he holds himself in high regard, and is indeed very selfish (even the chairman acknowledged this). Latil even says she's noticing his "hard work". Aaaand, he also has a personal reason to become a Royal Consort: his brother. He knows he came as a temporary consort and wants to prove his brother he deserves the position too (he's also very jealous of his intentions to marry Latil lol). We have witnessed before how Clein reacts to things he doesn't like, there's no doubt he would be extremely angry if he's not chosen. Also, I wonder if him using the power of the pure soul to seal Anyadomis will make him more prone to act with evil (not a fact, just me being curious).

- Jaisin: He's not personally interested in the position, but Baek Hwa is pushing him towards it. I'm not afraid of him being disappointed whatsoever, but I'm afraid of Baek Hwa’s reaction, we know he has chosen to believe in Latil temporarily, but what if he changes his mind if Jaisin is not the chosen one?

- Meradim: He might not be aiming for Latil's heart, but being a royal consort was one of his main intentions when he became a consort. I'm not afraid of his reaction either, I don't think he will be particularly mad unless Girgol is the one chosen as Royal Consort, and he might even not be so angry if the chosen one is Tasir (in case you don’t know, they’re really close and Meradim even calls Tasir "brother").

(I purposely didn't include Carlein and Girgol, they will have their own section)

Not only does everyone have a reason to believe they should become Gukseo, but most of them also have developed romantic feelings towards Latil (or Lord). Whoever gets picked, jealousy will arise, and so it's very unlikely they'll stay together for the power of friendship...

There are also other issues to consider. We know some consorts have some personal beefs with each other:

- Ranamun - Tasir: In chapter 284 (?), Tasir promised Ranamun he would not aim for the Gukseo position in exchange for his help in the purchasing of some properties (just so you know, Tasir never planned to keep his promise lol). Ranamun took it seriously. He even threaten Tasir in chapter 398*. I don't think there's any scenario were, if Tasir gets picked as a Gukseo, Ranamun will react peacefully. My main concern is that his anger will make him act as the adversary, and consequently antagonise with Latil.

*When Latil said she would become pregnant one day, Tasir held her hand and shared looks with her. Ranamun noticed it, and then approached him in private to warn him to never to sleep with her to avoid the risk of getting her pregnant. However, Tasir told him he couldn't avoid sleeping with her, because he was -after all- a consort first.

- Clein - Tasir: Similar case as with Ranamun. Tasir also promised Clein to help him become the Royal Consort. He might not have the same reaction that Ranamun, but he will for sure feel betrayed. I wonder what would happen if that were the case.

We also have Carlein - Guesta (remember when Guesta used the fox den to sent Carlein far away?), Clein - Girgol (remember when Clein destroyed his Greenhouse and Girgol did the same with his room?), Carlein - Ranamun (Ranamun accused Carlein of stealing Clein’s talisman), Guesta - Clein (at beginning of the story they fought endlessly), Guesta - Tasir (remember when they traveled with Latil to Karisen and all they did was fight?). I guess all of them have some reason to hate each other lmao, but I purposely just dove deep in the beefs that were more related to the royal marriage.

********

Well, Tumblr gals, this is the first part of my analysis. I wanted to cover some of the basic issues we shouldn’t ignore, regardless of our ships. I hope you like it. And again, this is just my take on what I've read, it's perfectly fine to have a different pov <3.

[andjanuary]

what's p-word poppin u guys it's jia (s/h, gmt+8, 20, also @20scmethings) n i give u:

GO YUNA. manhwa artist, with the #2 weekly webtoon in the horror/thriller genre, who can’t sit through horror movies because she knows everything that’s coming but still gets scared.

like n subscribe if you’d like to plot (disc avail!). i’m slowly losing it i fear but anyway.. links + tldr below!

STATISTICS

BIOGRAPHY

born n raised in chicago, babey! moved to seoul with her family when she was 14, and started attending school there. was kinda shy because she’s a heritage speaker and felt awkward expressing her, so she started writing, and then eventually, drawing.

mom’s ur typical overachiever (had an econs degree she never used) and enrolled yuna in lots of supplementary classes when she was younger. when she found out yuna liked to draw, she enrolled her into a hagwon that did... absolutely nothing but waste her time. yuna ended up quitting and got into a huge fight with her mom about it, where some very hurtful words were said. mom brought her a fruit plate afterwards n neither of them ever apologised for it and are just pretending like nothing happened. 

they focus their attention on lil bro, who’s much smarter than yuna. (was accepted to med school in uchicago recently!!!) in her second year of hs, mom moved back to chicago with lil bro to take care of her parents (also bc lil bro is a fucking genius when he’s doing the american syllabus lmaoo) & yuna stays in seoul w dad to finish high school up.

the first chapter of her manhwa is released in 2018 (3rd yr of hs), and slowly starts to gain popularity and a bit of a cult following. there are even forums dedicated to talking about the comic & theories (!!!!!!) and for the first time yuna feels genuinely passionate abt something. instead of studying, she just draws for the manhwa.

eventually oversleeps and misses the csat. laughs about it on her public instagram and wishes the other test-takers good luck & goes back to sleep. 

(her mom gets on a flight back and chases her around the house when she finds her daughter’s name trending at #2 on naver for missing the suneung. her dad thinks it’s kinda funny.)

bc of this, she finally explains to her parents that it’s #notaphase and she’s actually earning money from it! mom’s still pissed n dad wants her to retake the exam tho so :/

just in time, she herself goes viral after the suneung incident! it’s not everyday u see a cute high school student drawing body horror, and the manhwa’s popularity and viewership go up bc of it. she’s offered a proper contract with a Real Monthly Salary, and moves into a goshiwon to focus on finishing the manhwa & to escape her parents’ nagging.

moved into maehwa vvvvv recently (like. a week ago?), because after finishing mitm, she’s started work on a new series! premise is a haunted house (based off maehwa, ofc!) and that’s... really all she knows so far.

PERSONALITY

brash in a new york type beat but means well!!!

sometimes just settles in the most inconvenient places to draw. srry ur muse has to step over her to use the bathroom.

either doesn’t sleep at all or sleeps for 17hrs straight. pitfalls of not having a schedule for self-regulation.

hasn’t unpacked, but has already had so many of her online shopping packages shipped here that the entire 2nd floor is a fire hazard. srry neighbours... she is aggressively american tho and so she’s gonna go around knocking on doors and actually talking to people n offering them extra food she ordered/made.

again, no plots. my brain is smooth like... smth smooth.  just like this n i’ll hit u up here for both yuna n hanna tqtq kisses smooch mwah mwah xoxo

[towerofgod-blogposts]

#515. S3 Ch.98: 52F - The One High Above (2)

Chapter | Blog | Reddit | 2021.12.05 | Translated by fallen-slayer

Naver Endnote: Since there’s quite a few parts, the chapter came a bit late.  Hope everyone don’t catch a cold and stay healthy this winter. Thank you everyone.

This week's doodle is Ha Jinsung walking Viole to school. Personally I don't think Ha Jinsung considered Viole his child per se, it’s more of pity towards his certain special fate, but hehehe I thought it would be cute to draw them like this.

​The weather's getting really cold these days. The winds are like blades they say hehe. Recently, due to my insomnia I haven't had any caffeine, but I ended up drinking some... and I ended up staying up working all night with an absolutely clear mind ​qq I'll have the post queued and go home early. Recently there’s pretty much no problems with the upload system, and it tends to go ahead with almost all the boxes ticked, so it's nice not needing to check the upload at late hours.

Personally, even though I always spend a similar amount of time on the chapters, I think I have a different degree of concentration each chapter. As I create the chapters, sometimes I put in a lot of emotion, while other times I couldn’t... When it comes to a long-running series, I think the kind of attitude you have as you try to focus on the work is important as well. It's something I should work on more.

Since there's a lot of work load, my wrist's been acting up again, so I have a therapy appointment next week, I'm hoping to make some progress. If the work load increases, it's inevitable that the body suffers however, so this concerns me.

​Since I'm getting older, recently I often think of what a good person is, what a good life is, outside of the work context. Recently, I feel envious of those who can laugh easily and find happiness in the small things around them If I come across people like that, they brighten my day and I feel envious as well. I wonder if people are born that way, or if it was brought out by a just and happy heart, but while previously, I tried to find a justification/reason to show someone good will or bring them joy,  nowadays, perhaps it's best to not think too much, just smile and be happy. That's what I think sometimes. People who look happy end up gaining a lot from life. So I hope you all can smile and be happy ^^ Of course, working isn't something someone can do with a smile all the time, so that may be a bit of a problem hehe.

Then, I hope you all enjoyed this week's chapter, I'll be going now. I hope for a good night's sleep, and I hope for a morning that’s at least slightly warmer.

May you all have a happy and healthy week. As always, thank you See you next week!

​_ _

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

[semi-imaginary-place]

the weight of time, the other side, enemy 6. webtoons up to the other side 10

alright back to kubera, timey wimey shenanigans and maruna growing a conscious.

so kuberas one of those series where spoilers dont change the experience so i knew yaksha was going to show up but ah im so excited yaksha and og airavata??? thank you currygom. oh yeah and we got more on brilith's soul's past i guess.

huh so the ancient human cycle of reincarnation is breaking down. ptsd is being inherited across lives. humans were suppose to regain memories of their past lives when their minds and bodies were fully matured but violent deaths are leading to them regaining their memories before their minds are ready to deal with the trauma and as a result instead trraging each life seperately like we saw with the humans maruna interacted with, the humans ran meets there is no seperation between one life and the next its bluring together and thr grudges are growing as people life out the past. I love it!

...thats ananta. damn currygom is going HARD this arc, all the big names are here. also i just love ananta, yaksha, and og airavata having a breakfast club. ananta is half way to having the dead anime mom hair but joking aside the two foofy braids are super cute. currygom.... why you keep killing off all the nice ones... oh no yaksha has bad regeneration doesnt he... ok i just spent a week with a literal toddler and yeah gandharva

ok i cant tell how much of this heart talk is metaphorical and how much is literal ie yaksha physical heart is effecting ran emotionally. now that i think about it why is hanuman in their female form in the current timeline. wait maruna couldnt interact with another alive in the current time but ran can? i love yaksha why are all my favorite characters doomed. LET ME PROTECT THE CUTE OLD MAN. he's even white haired, has a tail, and is fluffy! fluffy! ran is watee attribute like yaksha too. wait i just remembered samphati told maruna that ideally a natiska parent would mentor a 5th stage rakshasa since 5th stage vigor and what not works more like a natuska and isnt that what yaksha is doing for ran. oh so this is what they meant by suras natures are to destroy. natiskas take of their attribues and astika create

ah so ran's half phobia isn't just trauma from the cataclysm but being afraid of himself. yeah where'd the wind transcendendal come from, ran is water water water

oh wow that experiment was more important than i thought. everyone is there

ooh naver commenter pointed out how sura sometimes scheme names their kids and raltara's parents name might be taraka the natiska name kali took to make yuta

this cute old man is bad for my heart. also ananta is precious. maruna continues to underestimate people but i will say him mistaking to most powerful being to have ever exisged in the universe for a 4th stage rakshasa ia pretty funny.

yaksha is basically a catboy. that explains a lot actually.

im enjoying the characterization of sagara. to sagara power is everything. ananta just wants everyone to be happy, he's uncomfortable with exterminating the ancient humans but he'll do it for sagara. this isnt true to himself or what he wants but he'll be what those around him want him to be. oh wow so the name/role of ananta was designed to take on a portion of every sin ever in the universe. also callback to brilith's conversations on whether its better to have gods that are too weak to do anything or have the power but choose not to help. oh shit and by brahma asking his consent in the destruction of the ancient humans (and ensuring it via sagara) she ensured the sins of killing them would fall on to him.

oh and somethings up with tilda but we dont know what yet. shes going to be important

where is marunas coat? mmmm head hurts... so gods forget things so that they arent weighted down by desires and reach the top/enlightenment. but once they reach the top the dont have to keep forgetting? about doomed willarav(??) all the deaths are turning point in which the characters didin't choose compassion. this is also the outcome that kali averted. ok im with maruna ran is giving me bad vibes. oooooo the maruna ran raltara gandharva situation! the tension! the drama! i was so caught up if the eye of punishment was going to be used by maruna or shess that a couple years ago i didnt even consider the possibility of a new character.

we also see the payoffs of the weight of time and the other side as well ran and maruna have come to see things from the other side (sura and humans). as others have pointed out maruna has spent several millennia among humans and discarded the sura cultural mentalities taught to him (obey superiors, no compassion etc which we see directly in his confrontation with samphati but everywhere after this time adventure) and taken a mentality closer to that of the first ancient humans. if humans using silent magic is said to lessen their humanity and make them more like sura ruthless calculating and cold, the maruna has become more human. the opposite is true of ran having spent many years living as a rakshasa and living far beyond a human lifespn. literally he has become more in tune with his sura side coming to terms with his grand parent being hanuman, yaksha's heart within him, and his power which killed his mother and he attacked the two next most important people to him lutz and rana. silent magic was said to need a desire for power, a lack of compassion for ones enemies, and a willingness to give up everything for one's goals. and mentally his mindset has been shifting from that of a humans to the one we usually see in sura. remember when he was introduced ran was the nicest character in the cast after leez.

so god kubera put the konchez party in a transcendental to stop their minds from merging with the maruna and ran of the current chapter. but thats what made them too late to stop taraka dying and 4th stage yuta. unless they wouldn't have made it aahhhhhhhh my head hurts i infinite possibilities gah! time travel! anyways but im still not sure what god kubera wants to begin with. wait no the mental transcendental preserved the minds of their former selves. the merge did happen that's how the clothes got "restored". oh yeah i forgot former kubera drew the sword of re before giving it to leez.

one of the currygom afterwords or something mentioned it but there's many more characters recently that do not neatly fit into the established boxes. perhaps its because at the beginning and and ending of the universe reality is looser. we have confirmation that yaksha clan bunny girl petupan that ran met has a chaos attribute but other sura we have met has chaos-ish aspects to them like other bunnygirl sona who maybe could be petupan's daughter? curiosly hanuman has a weird left arm when ran met him but doesnt in the modern day. then there's taraka that maintained their minds and forms like samphati and makara. then we have ran whos a human rakshasa (hanuman wondering if they forgot about a child with yaksha is still funny)

3-195 the other side 13 is the last we see maruna with his red fluffy coat in a flashback with raltara. it isnt seen until maruna goes to the abandoned timeline or n23

its probably intentional on currygoms part that yaksha's source attribute is water and that the inheritor of his heart ran was born with 3 water attributes. the interesting part is when ran starts using wind transcendentals and hanuman's source attribute is wind. so its almost as if he were a rakshasa with light as a clan attribute and water and wind as heteditary attributes. what im not sure of is in the fight with maruna ran seems to use some sort of lightning based attack and i cant quite remember so he either mixed partial surification with divine magic, has a sky attribute???? or there's sky transcendentals that dont require an attribute?

the abyss is the water channel of th sura realm?? omg and maruna cant remember the thing in the abyss that was chasing them because its existence has been replaced with yuta.

[jimlingss]

Starlet and Moonstruck [1]

Chapter 1||Chapter 2||Chapter 3||Chapter 4||Chapter 5

Words: 8.7k Genre: Fluff & Humour, Actress!Au Summary: As a newcomer actress struggling to make a name for yourself in the tough industry, you’re absolutely ecstatic to see your Dispatch pictures on the front page of Naver....but..what is this?! This isn’t about you! 

Who’s the third guy from the left?!

Cr.

Lights. Camera. Action.

“Y/N! Y/N! Y/N!” The chanting of your name begins simultaneously as the car door slides open and you step out. Your mouth draws into a huge smile, cheeks swelling, hand waving and the shrieking elevates. The screams from your fans beg you to spare any amount of attention to them. The journalists lean over the metal fence barrier, shoving their microphone in your direction and yelling out questions to supposed rumours. The artificial light flashes of the cameras provide you with luminescence, reminding you of a rave show, capturing your best angles with the long lenses. The shouts and clicking frenzy ricochets off the midnight sky.

You continue with black heels strutting against the red carpet, offering a last smile as you turn into the building. The life of fame is such a tough one.

“Uh, miss….did you pay for your ticket?”

Unfortunately, it’s a mere mirage.

You tug down your sunglasses, pupils narrowed into the ticket boy and he blinks at you, unfazed. Your hand reaches up, taking off the black face mask and you clear your throat. He still doesn’t recognize who you are and you give a mirthless laugh, ripping open your purse to slap a crisp bill on the counter.

“What movie?”

“When Spring Meets Autumn.” You tap your fingernails against the counter. “One ticket.”

“Uh-huh.” The teenager behind the booth makes excruciatingly slow movements, as if attempting to purposely piss you off. It’s a full minute later before he hands you the slip of paper and directs you to which auditorium.

You scoff, strutting away while putting on your disguise again, fearing that someone will see you for who you really are. It would be terribly inconvenient for you to draw a crowd at a time like this.

You find a spot smack dab in the rows of seats and the spaces around you end up getting filled out as the commercials roll in the meantime. Some folks give you odd stares and you decide to finally take off your sunglasses, rewarding them to sneak a peek at your face. But they simply turn around without a single comment.

There’s no time to dwell, not when the lights have dimmed and the movie is beginning.

“No! Sunhwa! You can’t do it! You can’t go back to him! He hurt you!”

It’s surreal to be watching on the large screen, to hear your own voice and see your own facial expressions. You murmur underneath your breath, “promise me one thing….promise me you’ll find happiness elsewhere and not with that bastard.”

“Promise me one thing!” Your visage is marred by a frown, tears running down your flushed cheeks and from your spot in the theater, you admire how pretty you look. It’s convincing as well, striking a chord from deep within. “Promise me you’ll find happiness elsewhere and not with that bastard.”

You let out a squeak at the way you enunciated ‘bastard’ with absolute spite. The main character and actress looks out the window and sure, while you might be playing a minor role, this is still something that can be used to propel you higher into your career.

A few more scenes pass by but you’re preparing for the one and only….

“SUNHWA!”

There’s the screech of the tires halting on pavement, a single scream and the car collides with your body. The epic, sad music begins to play and you commemorate how well you play dead on the road, though it only lasts a handful of seconds. In the next scene, it’s your funeral.

Two hours later, the movie has ended and you leave the theater with a humongous smile.

Why not? You decide to appease your fans and you take off your glasses, waiting by the door as people exit the movie, discussing the ending and how it was a mediocre film at best.

No one looks twice at you.

You clear your throat loudly and awkwardly as if you were choking. Some high school kid tapping away at their phone looks up to see if you’re dying. “Are you okay-”

“Did you see me?”

“What?”

You rest your elbow against the wall, hand touching your forehead as you sweep your hair back. “The movie. I was in it.”

The student frowns, a bit weirded out from you. “You were?”

“I was the main character’s best friend...you know, I was there for the first ten minutes in like three scenes. There was a car accident in the beginning.”

He shoots his brows upwards. “There was an accident?”

You exhale a long breath. Okay, the movie is two hours and a half, you might’ve only shown up for ten and a lot of shit does go down but how could this high school child not remember the plot at all?! Your death was the basis for everything else! It’s very important…

Right?!

//

It’s been your dream since you were young, when you could barely even count your own fingers. You cried for a fictional character, a name and actress that you didn’t know but what you did know was that you wanted to be like her. A starlet.

At four, while others your age wanted to be a princess or fairy, when asked, you said you wanted to be an actress. They encouraged you and smiled, praising how cute you were.

At ten, you declared that you would become an actress. They said ‘oh’ and many people wished you luck while skeptically walking away.

At eighteen, you set out a plan to become an actress and how to get to the road of fame. Your friends rolled their eyes, teachers told you to set realistic standards and your parents yelled at you to stop daydreaming.

But here you are….

Sort of.

It’s a bitter pill to swallow and even harder to admit, but after so many years of grueling hard work and begging on your knees, all the roles you have obtained are incredibly forgettable.

You don’t blame the high schooler for not knowing you were in the movie. Even the director forgot to put your name in the credits and you weren’t called to the premiers either. But it’s okay, you don’t really mind. Your manager got angry on your behalf anyways.

“Oh my! My stomach hurts so much! What should I do?” You spin around, holding a pill bottle in your hands. A single wink and finger gun motion later, you muster a bright smile. “NIJ Laxative Pills will cure your bowel way! Helps with constipation! Now I feel so much better!”

You hold yourself still and after a second, the director yells ‘cut!’.

“That was great, Y/N,” he says sitting from his chair and you monitor your performance with scrutinizing pupils. “Except, can you act more in pain? How about you sit on the toilet and rub your stomach. Don’t be afraid to look ugly. Remember, you’re constipated.”

“Okay! I can do that!” You bow waist down to the director before racing back onto set.

The staff watches, some coordis snickering at the way you gurgle and moan in fake pain, perched on top of the toilet. You end up spinning around and saying the second portion of your lines in a different outfit. Finally, after twenty takes and four hours, it’s over.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you.” You bow towards the director and all the staff, not caring about how a few of them give mocking smiles and how the director doesn’t say a single word in response or glance in your direction. Your hands are clasped together and you continue to express your gratitude to each person until they’ve walked away. “Thank you.”

It might be an embarrassing commercial and they might’ve laughed at you but you’re lucky to be here.

//

“Listen, we’re going to make your big break soon! I just know it, Y/N. Don’t give up! You have talent and someone will eventually notice!” Soo-Ae, your sweet manager has a stern expression and you nod with a newfound determination.

Aside from managing your schedule and assisting you every step of the way, Soo-Ae is your personal cheerleader and the backbone to your entire career. When there’s nobody there, she never fails to support and encourage you.

“The CF turned out great and your recent movie got you more fans!” She smiles, fixing a strand of your hair and smoothing out your golden teacup dress as the stylists pack up. “Soon more articles will pop up and it’ll be the start of something great.”

Six years ago at eighteen years of age, fresh out of high school and bare-faced, your audition blew the older woman’s socks off. She claimed that you have a brilliant gift and your manager went as far as to beg the higher-ups of the company to take you in. To this day, she is still the one who finds all the opportunities for you.

“Thank you.” You feel a tear pricking at your eyes but you repress it in fear of smudging your mascara. “I don’t know what I would do without you.”

“Oh please, your success is mine.” The woman places her hands on your shoulders and you muse that she’s truly the older sister that you’ve never had. “There’s also something else that I need to tell you, Y/N.”

You look away from your reflection in the mirror. “What is it?”

“Don’t freak out. I want you to remain calm. But I got in touch with a company recently and after a lot of discussion, they’ve agreed to take pictures of you.”

There’s a bit of silence, anticipation building in your stomach as your mind races. “Who?”

“It’s Dispatch.”

You nearly drop to the ground right then and there.

Click.

But the flash of the camera breaks you out of your daze. The photographer smiles and you gather up a wider grin, raising your hand for a wave, tipping your head to one side. You’re pretending to walk into the company building nonchalantly, as if they had caught you by surprise but this is far from normal. It’s not everyday that you get the opportunity to pose for one of the most popular newsgroups.

You’re internally screaming as the clicks continue to go off and you try to make different expressions, straightening your posture, lips meekly turned upwards. There are a few people near the metal gate barrier, fans holding up signs with your name and shouting out for your attention. You’re not sure how many people there are planted by your manager and how many are actually real but it’s still nice to have some sort of backdrop that might hint to your oncoming fame.

“Alright, that was great!” As the photographer drops his expensive camera, the cheering simultaneously dies out. Like you suspected, all of those people crying out for you are fake.

A sharp sting bites the muscle beating near your rib cage but the hurt is interrupted when you catch a black cloud of hair, a tall figure wearing a bright red cap standing amongst the female crowd, a rather cute face-

“Well, the article should come out later today or tomorrow.” Dispatch’s photographer interrupts your daydream and you whip your head around, listening attentively. “We like to work fast and it’s no problem when we’re only releasing a few photographs and a couple of sentences.”

“O-oh, thank you.” You bow and he hums, nodding his head.

Your manager comes outside, smiling towards the people behind the barrier who begins to scatter, breaking the cardboard signs of your name and throwing the posters into the trash. Soo-Ae goes to speak to the Dispatch employee about some details in the article while you skip into the building.

You’re giggling and twirling, beaming with happiness. This could be it. This is the one thing that could propel your dreams and make them become fulfilled.

You leave the front entrance behind, abandoning your fake fans that were hired by your manager. Unknowingly, you leave one real one behind as well.

//

The laptop screen lights up in bright colours. You’re seen in the center on a white toilet, a cute growl leaving your stomach as your face twists up. “My stomach hurts so much. What should I do?!”

There’s a poof and you’re seen twirling around in a different outfit, facing the front again with a pill bottle in your hand. You give a charming wink and a finger gun motion, smiling vividly. The music jingle plays ‘bah-dah-ba’.

“NIJ Laxative Pills will cure your bowel way! Helps with constipation! Now, I feel so much better!”

The logo flares on screen as a deeper voice on the CF sounds, one that speaks rapidly, whispering all the cautionary warnings of the brand and how consumers must ingest by their own discretion and the company isn’t held responsible for any damages.

Yet, you’re not paying any attention to your new commercial that you’ve watched at least a thousand times. You’re on your phone, eyes glued to the screen, teeth chewing the nail of your thumb, muttering incoherently under your breath. Stop freaking out, stop freaking out, stop freaking out, you chant back to yourself to calm down.

It’s one in the morning and the Dispatch article was released hours ago. You’ve been too scared to check, to see what they said about you, what the comments are, how you look in the photos. But now you’ve built up the courage and with a trembling finger, you press onto the app, refreshing the page….

Naver appears and you’re about to search for your article, only to be stopped with a gasping breath. IT’S….IT’S…

IT’S ON THE FRONT PAGE?!

The written piece with your face as the icon, headlines running across the screen is trending, at the very top and your heart gets stuck in your throat. You begin to sob uncontrollably, feeling overwhelmed, both happy and relieved, enthralled with excitement and the burden of trying for so many years have been lifted off your shoulders. It’s here.

Fame has come knocking at your door.

You double tap on the article, wiping away your drenched cheeks. The page pulls up with a handful of lovely photographs of yourself and carelessly written captions underneath. You’re quite splendid in them, smiling without showing the stiffness, clear skin and bright eyes, a gorgeous dress that doesn’t take away from your appearance. But you don’t dwell on the pictures, quickly sliding your hand down the screen to view the comments underneath. They begin to load and you hold the air in your lungs…

[New Rising Actress Y/N Gathers Fans at Company Entrance]

1. [+3,233, -68] Oh my god. Who is that third guy from the left?!

2. [+2,987, -145] That third guy from the left in the back is crazy handsome. If that guy is reading this comment right now, please marry me!!

3. [+2,336, -38] Holy sh*t, that guy in the red hat is so freaking cute. His smile is killer, wow! It’s unreal. Is he an actor or an idol??? I need to know his name asap!

4. [+1,062, -57] It’s a shame I’m a fifty year old married woman. Please become my son in law! My daughter went to Seoul University and she needs someone like you!!

5. [+789, -20] ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ Isn’t it funny that this random fan got more attention that this nobody actress?

6. [+490, -23] Who is this actress though?

7. [+260, -15] Dispatch, please take photos of the third guy from the left next!

8. [+13, -3] Ah, I wish she would move a bit more to the right. Or maybe just out of the screen.

9. [+12, -2] ㅋㅋ This actress is a nobody! ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ

You scroll all the way back up to the photographs and exactly like the comments, your face pales in comparison to the man; the third one from the left, standing behind the metal fence barrier amongst the crowd of fake fans, smiling innocently with a red cap on. He’s in nothing but a plain white and blue jersey, black disheveled hair poking out, absolutely breathtaking.

The mysterious person looks worlds better compared to you who’s dolled up and perfected with layers of makeup. It took you a tremendous amount of effort to get to where you are, yet he’s nothing more than a bystander, a stranger who’s gained what you desired most.

“My stomach hurts so much. What should I do?!” The jingle plays in the background. “NIJ Laxative Pills will cure your bowel way! Helps with constipation! Now, I feel so much better!”

You slam down your laptop, silencing the embarrassing commercial and it occurs to you how quiet and dark the apartment has become. You sink down into your bed, not bothering to turn off the lamp as your tears trickle from your eyes and onto the pillow, creating a damp mess.

Who’s that actress though? She’s a nobody.

Tiny sobs break through your mouth and you chuck your mobile device away, letting you weep yourself until exhaustion has taken you.

//

The man sits across from you, smiling and happy to be in the presence of another beautiful individual. You solemnly pick at the food in your plate, nodding lifelessly as he blabbers on. The meal is eventually finished, two hours passed and you follow after him in the elevator, feet shuffling on muscle memory while your brain is a kilometer away. You don’t catch onto his sly glimpses of you.

It doesn’t truly occur to you where you’re going until the older man is fishing for his hotel room key card, his other hand snaking to the dips of your waist and gently palming over your ass.

You immediately snap out of it, flinching out of the stranger’s grasps, feeling lightheaded from the one glass of wine. The man takes notice of your abrupt movement and his hand freezes, eyebrow cocked upwards, “What’s wrong?”

“I-uh….I’m just feeling a little tired.” You manage to plaster on a meek smile, brushing your hair back and speaking in a soft and honeyed voice, “I think I should head home.”

“So soon?” He rests against the doorway, scanning you from head to toe while licking his lips, as if envisioning what you would look like stripped from the short black dress, thrown onto the mattress with your lipstick smeared and your mascara running down your cheeks.

You hide your disgust with a clearing of your throat and he nudges towards the hotel room. “You could come inside and rest. I promise we’ll only talk business in there and...maybe we can have a bit of fun too afterwards. It’ll be good for you, Y/N. I can guarantee that you’ll feel good as well.”

A muscle in near your eye twitches and your jaw feels numb from the exaggerated grin but you keep it up. You bow your head to show your respect and for the purpose of seniority. “I’m okay. Thank you, I had a nice time.”

Your manager, Soo-Ae, had told you that someone in the industry was interested in you and your work. You instantly agreed to have dinner with him and meet him for potential opportunities but what you failed to realize, while your mind was preoccupied from the Naver article, was that this was a sponsorship offer - sexual favours in exchange for money and power.

“Are you sure you want to leave?” He stops you from escaping, purposely moving in your way. The older man reeks of cologne and you hold in a cough. “I could get you the roles that you want.”

Upon hearing his confident statement, you waver. He must detect it in your expression since he continues on with the sweet coaxings. “There’s nothing to worry about. A lot of celebrities like you come to me for help. I have connections, I know people. The things that you want, the roles, I could easily get them for you in the blink of an eye.”

The man’s large hand clasps around your wrist, giving a light tug and he smiles. “And I know a lot more people would want to help you too. Not only would you get the fame that you’ve always dreamed of but you’ll be rich beyond belief. Money, luxury, clothes, films, CFs, dramas - it’s all yours. All you have to do is be obedient and listen.”

His whispers and the deep timbre of the man’s vibrating voice causes you to swallow hard. It’s the devil’s offer, a dream or a miracle, something that you’d never be able to obtain out of your own will.

Yet, you pry his grip off of you, standing your ground. “That’s not the method I want to take to reach my dreams.”

He mirthlessly chuckles, a cold tone ringing in the empty hallway to the private hotel suite. “You sure are stupidly naive for being in this industry for six years. Just put down your goddamn pride for once. There’s nothing to be embarrassed about. This is the only way you’ll make it, sweetheart. You really think you can become famous purely by your hard work? What a joke.”

The older man rolls his eyes, clearly pissed off at how you’re wasting his time and not spreading your legs automatically like people in the past have. Instead, you bow your head once more, fingernails sinking into your skin to hold in the tears that threaten to pour.

“I’m going to leave now. Thank you for the dinner. Goodbye.”

“Mark my words,” he calls after you in a booming voice, “you’ll come crawling back one way or another!”

//

When you can’t cry, you smile. When you can’t scream, you laugh.

There’s no time or place to complain or whine, to be enraged or sorrowful, not in this cut-throat industry that would slice you up like a sirloin steak the moment they catch a flicker of a weakness. You haven’t even made it yet. You can’t sob for what you don’t have.

“My stomach is hurting so badly, help me.” The main actress for the comedy television drama collapses on the counter. You twirl around in your white coat, acting as the local pharmacist.

“What did you eat recently?”

The actress frowns and recalls in her mind, muttering underneath her breath, “Bong-su….this morning…” A flash of recognition slaps her across the face but she clutches onto her stomach.

You smile, sliding over a NIJ laxative pill bottle over the counter which she takes gratefully.

“Cut!”

The director’s cue causes the entire set to rush forward, fixing the actress’ messy hair and makeup to prepare for the next scene. You step out from behind the counter, bowing to her to which she smiles and tells you what a good job you did. You thank the director and the rest of the staff as you leave.

It was only a brief cameo, probably something that might be aired for less than a minute. Still, any exposure is good exposure at this point.

You’re in the dressing room, packing up your bag when your phone begins to spasm in your pocket. You apologize to the stylists for the noisy sound and you smile at your manager’s name that’s displayed across the screen. She wasn’t too happy that you made the potential sponsor and perhaps future associate angry but she ultimately brushed it away.

You pick up the phone call, wondering if Soo-Ae already received another opportunity for you.

“Hello?”

“Y/N, are you done with filming? Come to the company building right now, there’s something important that I need to tell you. I’m on the fifth floor, fourth conference room in the west wing. Hurry.”

//

“No.”

You thought at this point, you’d almost do anything to make it big but this is your absolute limit. “I can’t. It’s embarrassing. It’s horrible. I just can’t.”

“Y/N…” Soo-Ae sighs and rubs her temples for an extended second. She’s leaning against the table, her feet and arms crossed, watching you pace back and forth. “You don’t have a choice.”

A nervous breakdown comes knocking at the door, distress holding your frame captive and you shake your head, grasping onto the hair near your scalp. “No. No!”

Your manager inhales a deep breath and pushes herself to stand properly. She takes three strides up to you and presses her comforting hands on your shoulders, locking your eyes with her’s. The oncoming mental collapse barrelling towards you temporarily halts.

“Listen to me, Y/N, and listen carefully. At this point, the company is willing to try anything that will work. The PR team and I have spoken and they’re right. It’s been six fucking long years and if your career doesn’t propel up now, it’s all over. We’re both not getting younger and it’ll get harder and harder from here. This is just a way to draw attention to you so that people can see you for who you really are, your talents and gifts. It’s a strategy, a tactic.” Her desperation manages to coax you an inch. “I know you can do this, Y/N. It’s worth a shot.”

She’s right. You’ve made it this far. Are you really going to stop now? How can you bear to let all your efforts go to waste?

You slowly enunciate the word, “okay.”

Soo-Ae smiles at your response. “Good.”

“Where is he?”

Your life is one tragic comedy.

“He’s in the next room over.”

No...No...No…

You’re screaming internally from denial. ‘Yes..Yes...Yes…’, your manager’s light shoves conveys and you’re forced to open the door. There’s broad shoulders and a large backside that greets you. A black cloud of hair sits on top of his head, untamed and poofy. The head turns and shining, bright eyes crinkle with the humongous grin. The man is more so of a boy, carrying an innocent aura that seems heightened with his excitement. He’s in nothing more than a navy green jacket, dark jeans but he’s unmistakably drop dead gorgeous.

He’s even more beautiful than the photos and for a moment, you’re blown away, forgetting who the actual celebrity in the room is. Fuck. You’re envious of him.

There’s silence.

You stare at him. He stares at you. You wonder how someone can have such pillowy lips, strong brows that create a cute face, look so perfected as if they were sculpted from a deity’s hands. It doesn’t occur to you that he’s completely starstruck in your presence.

After a jab from your manager, you sigh and snap out of your trance. “Are you my new bodyguard?”

“Yes, I am!” He shouts in elation and you frown, questioning if you heard him let out a squeal. His smile is so wide, you ponder if it might break his face - if it does, you’ll celebrate. “My name is Kim Seokjin! It’s nice to finally meet you!”

You wish you could say the same.

//

It’s unbearable. Kim Seokjin, infamous Third Guy From The Left, follows you around everywhere you go. His presence is a constant reminder that you couldn’t become famous on your own and reach your dreams with your own talents. Instead, you have to ride off of his fame, utilize his nice face as a strategy to gain attention from the public. It’s sad. It’s humiliating.

It’s even worse that he’s so goddamn annoying.

“Will you stop whistling?!” You snap at him in the van and he jolts, immediately quieting down.

He dips his head, lips slightly pouting but the genuine sadness is felt through his softly whispered words, “I’m sorry.”

Goddammit. Now you feel like the villain.

And why does he have to look like that? Like a kicked puppy?

“Can you stop staring at me?!” You growl at him and he whirls his head to look at the window, wincing from your harsh tone. He murmurs another apology and you groan, fingers pinching the bridge of your nose from the accumulating stress.

You can’t help feeling nothing but disdain for him. It’s unfair. He’s done nothing to get to where he is, to have his nickname trending and all over the front page of news sites. Paparazzi and people alike are searching for him, to find out more details, his name and age, to satisfy the curious netizens. It’s infuriating.

“Carry my stuff.”

Seokjin catches the bags that you hurl towards him and he cheerfully pulls your luggage into the building after you. He still remains happy-go-lucky, humming under his breath, chasing after your tail and always….always staring at you like he can’t believe he’s actually with you.

You don’t know what that guy’s problem is. “Go fetch me some water.”

“Okay!”

But you have to endure this.

Your manager was right after all. There have been pictures released with Seokjin standing beside you and it’s blown up, some speculating that he may be your boyfriend while most put two and two together, figuring out that he’s your new bodyguard. Of course, your name is linked with his too. Whatever fame he gains, you’re also benefiting.

You repeat the single statement to yourself over and over again: ‘any exposure is good exposure at this point’.

“No, I don’t want this water!” You chuck the bottle to the ground, letting him watch it roll to his feet. “Go downstairs and take the elevator to the second floor. At the east wing, four doors down to the left, not right, there's a coffee break room. Go to the back where the mini-fridge is and take the bottle from the first shelf, not the third one or the one attached to the door. Got that?”

He lifts up his hand, eyes widening. “W-wait-!”

“Go.”

You turn towards the mirror, picking apart the flaws to cover them up with a thick layer of concealer. It’s not until ten minutes have passed before your manager comes into the room, monetarily glaring at the stylists tapping away at their phones in the corner. “Where’s Seokjin?”

“Hmm?” You twirl a piece of your hair, glancing over at Soo-Ae.

That’s right….where did he go?

There’s a thought that knocks the wind out of your lungs - what if he left? Maybe you scared him off….good….but no-.....that’s bad. You need him. Rather, you need his fame and his gorgeous face.

You end up running around the entire building, asking others if they’ve seen him and chasing after his shadow, places where you miss him by a mere couple of seconds. Your polished hair becomes a mess, makeup smudged and clothes rumpled. You would feel angered...if only you didn’t feel so guilty first.

“Um, excuse me. Do you know where the east wing to the second floor is?”

“Kim Seokjin!” Your guilt heightens as he swivels his head over, an enormous grin tugging his lips and causing his cheeks to swell. He bows his head towards the worker who hums and leaves. Seokjin’s eyes are gleaming as he skips over to you, transforming from a lost puppy into a happy dog that’s finally found its owner. “What are you doing?!”

“I’m sorry. I got lost and I didn’t know how to go back either. This building’s really big! But I got you some water! It’s not the one in the mini-fridge but I found-”

You take the bottle in his hand with a long sigh, defeated with his undying eagerness. “I don’t need water anymore. Let’s just go back, okay?”

Seokjin audibly squeals when you take his hand, holding it in yours and lugging him along the maze of halls. You turn around, lifting up a brow and he downcasts his head, the tips of his ears burning a bright shade of red, attempting to repress another big smile and failing.

//

The stylists grumble as they fix the mess on your head and on your face. However, when Seokjin takes a seat next to you at the dressing tables, they seem absolutely elated, shoving each other lightly to battle who gets to brush his lashes and groom his brows.

“Why is he getting styled as well?”

You watch as the coordinator rushes to prepare a suit for him, steaming out all the wrinkles and measuring his arm with tape. “He’s supposed to be my bodyguard!”

Soo-Ae comforts you with her hand tapping your back in steady beats. “Don’t complain, Y/N. One day, you’ll thank him, I know it.”

There was another opportunity, more specifically, a pictorial with CeCi magazine. Obviously, you nearly soiled your pants when your manager told you but what you didn’t expect was for Seokjin to be involved with it as well.

There’s a bright flash from the camera and Seokjin flinches.

“Can you please relax?” The photographer asks him and you observe him fumble around. You don’t know if you should laugh at him or cry. The poor boy is so stiff and confused, only able to clasp his hands behind his back and give a pretty smile. He fails with any other pose, stance or expression and constantly looks over at you with distress.

There’s another click, a flash and your newly hired bodyguard is caught mid-blink on the monitor.

“No! No! Just stop scrunching your eyebrows. Relax your shoulders…..take a step forward...now to the right, okay. No, you still look tense. Don’t worry about anything. Look into the camera now.”

“I’m sorry.” He cries out, limbs awkwardly hanging by his side. The coordis and stylists look on in disappointment and revulsion for the way his handsome face has gone to waste by the lack of his skills. It’s a pitiful sight unraveling in front of you as Seokjin grows more and more distraught. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine.” The photographer exhales in exasperation, dropping his camera and spinning around to look at you. He mumbles something about getting it done and over with. “What’s your name? Y/N? You can come over now.”

Seokjin breathes out a sigh of relief when you step onto the set. The white backdrop and studio umbrella lights surround him, the fluorescent artificial tubes seering into his irises. You feel a bit of compassion for the male, how he was thrown in abruptly without much of a warning. It can be overwhelming to have a camera lense solely on you, for the bright lights to burn to the back of your skull, for everyone to be watching in deafening silence, anticipating something amazing to happen.

The pressure could break anyone.

You, at the very least, have to admit that he looks quite spectacular in his suit. It’s tailored to fit and hug his body, giving him an affluent vibe, despite the natural innocent and childlike aura. Seokjin looks like a rich heir of three generations of CEOs. In comparison, the coordinator chose for you to wear a lace baby pink dress that stops mid-thigh, paired with a fitted white blazer coat that matches the length of the dress and black kitten heels. Roseate flowers clip the side of your hair back, matching the colour of your matte lipstick. For once, you’re mildly satisfied with how you look.

The best thing you can do now is to put on an act and ease him.

“Calm down.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize.” You smile and Seokjin’s cheeks grow warm. “Don’t be self-conscious. Pretend that it’s just me and you. There’s nothing to be afraid of, honestly.”

You place a hand on his shoulder, looking up at the male and he gazes back into your twinkling orbs. There’s a gasp in the corner of the room but the two of you don’t notice. The camera flashes.

If you were being truthful, you were anxious as well. It was your first time ever shooting for a pictorial and for a famous magazine agency at that. But seeing Seokjin clumsy and frightened, somehow made you feel calmer. You don’t know anything about him, but it still amazes you how beautiful he looks up close.

“Are you nervous around me?” You incline your head to one side, grinning at how his cheeks are flaming red and the tip of his ears look like they’ve caught on fire. His breathing has halted, his heart is thundering underneath his chest. Seokjin coyly smiles and you step closer to him.

He recoils back, startled but you pull him closer. Your hand is around the nape of his neck and you stare at his thick, pillow lips with half-lidded eyes. “That’s great!” The photographer shouts and Seokjin’s bewildered expression is marred when he realizes you’re only in this narrow proximity with him for the photographs. His hand naturally takes hold of your waist and you melt into his arms, lolling your head to give a mesmerized gaze at the lens of the camera.

There’s a click, a flash, the lights illuminating your visage.

Seokjin continues to focus on you, his gaze pinned on your features. You look off at the camera, sometimes giving a sly smile and other times, expressionless. The both of you change positions from his arm draped over your shoulder to you embracing him, his backside towards the photographer, the profile of his face seen when he tilts his head ninety degrees.

The room has gone silent. Coordinators and stylists, your manager, all watching in awe. The photographer is bouncing around the room, spamming his camera, screaming out compliments as he’s found his lifetime muse or that this is the greatest photoshoot in existence. “Holy shit! Wow! One more shot, one more shot!”

You and Seokjin look at each other at the same time, bursting out into laughter.

The camera flashes again.

You put on an act, ignoring the anger and jealousy, attempting to be civilized and pull Seokjin in for the sake of getting good photos. It’s all the more ironic that you’re the one gravitating towards him. And you don’t realize that you forgot you were acting.

//

“The pictorial blew up!” Your manager screeches through the phone and you immediately go to pull up the article.

The pictures are as stunning as the previews you saw through the monitor on the day of the shoot. For a moment, you’re captivated by how beautiful the final HD versions are, especially with the softened filter that adds a romantic and sweet atmosphere. Your face is poreless, hair smooth and body without a flaw. You wish you looked that good in reality.

Seokjin is even more magnetizing than you are, his expressions without a hint of awkwardness or tension. Though his best takes are the ones where he’s staring at you…..

You wonder why that is.

Without dwelling too much, you scroll down to the comments.

[Rookie Actress Y/N and Third Guy From The Left’s First Pictorial with CeCi]

1. [+4,955, -128] Third guy from the left strikes again! But who is this actress?

2. [+3,803, -80] Wow. They seriously look like a modern prince and princess!

3. [+3,076, -54] Thank you for washing my eyes. Ah~ it’s a visual paradise!!!

4. [+2,606, -79] F*cking crazy...beautiful people do live in another world.

5. [+1,921, -891] You have to admit that she’s really pretty too. It’s a fact that she’s a natural beauty.

6. [+683, -27] I’m so jealous of her. She must’ve saved an entire country in her past life to be standing next to him.

7. [+679, -52] But why does she need a bodyguard if she doesn’t have any fans? ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ

8. [+656, -57] Is it true that he’s her bodyguard?

9. [+83, -79] ㅋㅋㅋBut why is the supposed bodyguard in the pictorial????? ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ

You scroll past thousands of comments, silently agreeing with the ones that ask why your bodyguard would be in something like this. But your manager and the PR team were right. Your name is being taken with his and whatever fame Seokjin receives, you gain from it too.

In your apartment with the dim lights, you decide to look up his name in the search bar.

You’re aware it’s the worst thing you can do. You’ve been told by your manager and countless others to never search yourself up on the internet. Most comments are never kind and you don’t need an external source of criticism when you already internally self-deprecate yourself.

But the curiosity is too strong and ultimately wins over.

‘Third Guy From The Left Official Fan Club’ comes up and your mouth drops open. The membership to his official fan club is in the hundred thousands. When you look up at your name, one of the top sites is an anti-fan club. You decide to enter your official fancafe, only to find that it’s still at a hundred followers. It hasn’t shifted, not by one.

Why are you not surprised?

It’s not like you were ever good enough to be liked by other people anyways.

//

Seokjin gains a new name. From ‘Third Guy From The Left’, it has evolved into ‘Great Guy’.

There are gif sets of him walking down the street, browsing in stores, caught eating in restaurants all over twitter; clips of him put onto instagram, articles posted on instiz and nate. You’re always there in the corner of the photographs or clips too...occasionally blurred out.

Wherever you go, Seokjin’s paid to follow.

“I’m done.” You sniffle, lightly dabbing the sleeve of your sweater at your nose. “Let’s go.”

Seokjin opens the door to the restaurant and the cold air nabs at your skin. You shiver, turning around and catching the old owner lady attaching Seokjin’s signature to the wall, a request that she had asked him of when serving your food.

He continues to stare at you while you both walk alongside each other down the avenue. You can’t even go out to grab a meal in peace without your manager persisting that he joins you.

“Can you stop looking at me?” You spit out while you shake in your boots, the frost in the air kissing your forehead and cheeks. If you didn’t feel so lonely in your apartment, you would’ve called a taxi home by now.

“Were you crying?”

His whispered question causes you to stop on your heel. A frown inches its way between your brows, mind reeling if he heard your sniffling past the dingy door of the restaurant or if your eyes were still red. But you were confident upon looking in the mirror that your makeup wasn’t smudged and there was no difference in your face. Did you puffy eyes give it away?

You give him something between a scoff and a mocking chuckle, picking up your pace so he can’t have time to read your expression. “Don’t be ridiculous!”

No one’s ever been able to tell when you’re sad. You’ve always been too good at acting happy.

“S-sorry.”

A long exhale leaves your parted lips. “Don’t apologize.” There’s another extended silence and you steal a peek at Seokjin, only to find him already gazing at you. He immediately averts his stare when your eyes lock and he clears his throat, ears burning scarlet. You smile at his bashfulness, finding it easy to tease him. “You know, you were pretty good in the pictorial.”

His orbs light up. “Really?!”

“You’re good,” you admit with a nod. Doesn’t he already realize this when he looks into the mirror every morning? “Honestly, you might be a natural at it. I think you should look into some modeling agencies or talk to Soo-Ae about it. You could be famous.”

“No.” He shakes his head. “I don't want to be famous, at least not like that. And I was only decent at it because you were there. I’m...I’m a pretty awkward person.”

“I don’t think so…” You pause, looking up at him with unintentional pouting lips. “I think you’re just a bit clumsy but it’s your charm. It’s a shame you don't want to become famous. You have star potential.” A bitterness lingers on your tongue of how he’s already gained recognition but you push it away before a green monster can take hostage of your soul again.

“But if you don’t want to enter this industry, what do you want to do?”

“I-.......I want to be a director.”

He tilts his chin up, staring at the faint stars of the sky, the ones that are unable to show the true potential with the bright city lights. You’re surprised by his answer, eyebrows shooting up to your hairline. You don’t know anything about Seokjin aside from his name. But ‘director’ was an answer you weren’t expecting.

“Really?”

He hums, eyes crinkling with his gentle smile. “I’ve always wanted to make a movie - make an entire universe inside my head come to life. If I could make others feel what I feel inside, if I can share the ideas in my mind, I think that would be a dream come true. Could you imagine? My story being told on the big screens. To work with screenwriters, actresses and actors, cinematographers and editors, all to fulfil a vision and create a masterpiece…..”

As he rambles on, you’re affected by his enthusiasm, unwittingly smiling with him. It’s powerful to hear someone as desperate as you are to make their ambitions come to fruition. Most often than not, you have to encourage yourself but to listen to Seokjin, you feel rejuvenated and refreshed.

“Well, you’re on the right track.” You tell him, acknowledging that building connections is vital. If Seokjin continues to linger around you, he’d get to know the people behind the scenes and he’d be that much closer to fulfilling his goals.

He grins. “It’s all thanks to you.”

“No.” You let your own sharp words seep into your skin like barbed wire. “I’m a nobody.”

“That’s not true!” Seokjin protests in a higher pitched voice, causing you to become startled. You glare at him and he sheepishly smiles. “This might be so embarrassing and I don’t mean to make you uncomfortable but you’re the one who’s made me come this far.”

You raise a brow. “What do you mean?”

“I’ve had this dream for a long time but it was only...a dream.” He stops to sit down at a bench. You don’t realize that you’ve become mesmerized. “And then I watched your film in theaters a few months ago….”

“When Spring Meets Autumn.” “When Spring Meets Autumn.”

The pair of you respond at the same time and he nods, smiling warmly at you. “I cried in the theater at the beginning scene, the car accident, and it was so good. I was moved and when I went home, I joined your fancafe. I read about your post, how you got to where you are..”

You still remember writing out three pages of your struggles, how difficult it was for you to get to where you are, how much discouragement you experienced along the way. You poured out your heart and soul but you didn’t expect anyone to read it….until now…

Seokjin gazes at you, becoming shy in your presence and flustered, downcasting his head and murmuring, “I admire you for going after what you want. You inspired me to pursue my dream. I’m a big fan of you, Y/N.”

I’m a big fan of you, Y/N. I’m a big fan of you, Y/N. I’m a big fan of you, Y/N.

The words and the deep timbre of his voice rumbles in the hollows of your skull. You’re absolutely stunned, jaw dropped, boring your pupils into his skin, shocked out of your mind. No strung syllables have sounded sweeter in your world. Your heart trembles and you muse that you’ve found your favourite sentence in the world-

I’m a big fan of you, Y/N.

It all makes sense. Why Seokjin is always so perplexed when you come into close contact with him, why he yelps when you take his hand, the reason he’s always staring at you, why he’s so shy….why he was there on the day of your Dispatch photoshoot, cheering and calling out your name in the background.

Seokjin is your number one fan.

(He might be your only fan).

Your entire life, you’ve had no recognition. Not from teachers or parents or friends. There have been comments full of hatred, discouragement, asking you who the hell you are and telling you how you’ll never make it in this industry. To be sitting in front of someone gleaming, blabbering on and chattering about how talented you are, how great you are, how gifted you are…

You almost want to cry.

“The way you were on the road, thinking about your best friend before you passed away...wow...your pronunciation and your expressions are so damn good. I bought the movie dvd and I think I watched it four or five times by now. Oh! I also watched your commercial, the CF of the NIJ pills and it was really cute. Did you think of the dialogue? It was great! I also admire the way you respond to fans’ comments. I can really feel your appreciation in each post-”

You latch onto his hands, feeling his cold fingers with your icy ones. Seokjin flinches upon the contact, eyes grown wide and your teeth sink into the bottom of your lip, holding in a waterfall of tears.

“Thank you. Thank you so much.”

He lolls his head to one side, blinking at you. “What for?”

Seokjin already feels excited to be sitting beside you and talking to you. It’s a dream that’s been fulfilled for him. When he received a call from your company, he couldn’t believe his ears and to meet you in real life, he thought he was going to have a heart attack. He already considers himself lucky to be such a successful fan and interact with his ultimate bias on a daily basis.

His stanning life is one whirlwind fantasy come true.

You open your mouth, about to pour out your gratitude for his endless support and apologize for the way you’ve been treating him but you’re unfortunately interrupted-

“E-excuse me…” A girl with long black hair and blunt bangs, still in her high school uniform leans over with her phone still in her hands. A horde of four other teenagers are off to the side, giggling beneath their palms. “Can we take a selca with you?”

Seokjin is befuddled, lips pouted, cheeks rounded and he nods slowly, getting up to meet the crowd. They line up, taking photos with him, getting his autograph. He soon gathers a crowd of other folks, all fangirling and screeching, bouncing up and down and quietly screaming, filming him with their mobile devices. The boy tries to satisfy everyone, rushing over to sign and smile while taking pictures, lost and confused amongst the chaos.

You smile to yourself, finally admitting there's no point in denying the obvious. Seokjin is rather cute.

//

With not much to do on a Sunday evening, you decide to hop onto Pann. It isn't a site where the general public goes; typically festered with idol fans and hate for popular groups, much like Nate, but you're still curious to see what people say about you on there. Unlike Naver where there are published articles made by journalists and news groups, here people can create their own pages and discussions, a forum for fans to freely express themselves and leave comments.

To your surprise, instead of being bashed to death, you discover something much different.

[enter-talk] COME FEAST YOUR EYES! MY OPT FAIRYTALE COUPLE~

-Wow, is this real??

-I’m not a fan but even I had to save these pictures..

-They're so so so cute together!!! I love them ㅠㅠ

-I think I'm in love with the both of them..

-Unbelievable..How can people look like this..

-Please date and last long you two!

-If they had kids, they would be crazy good looking..ah~ I’m jealous of their genes already..

You scroll up from the comments, studying the photographs that were caught by bystanders on the street who saw the pair of you walking by. There's the pictorial pictures, the original Dispatch images and photoshopped ones. You notice that Seokjin’s gaze always drips of honey when it's directed at you and your smiles always seem brighter when it's around him.

You stare for the longest time at the photos, agreeing that Seokjin’s face is indeed god-level….

Your finger holds down on the images, saving them all to your gallery.

[dnkaus]

Fateful Visions | Chapter 21: Incredulous Encounter

Namjoon x Reader (OC)

Summary: Idol Namjoon meets a grad student, Maya, but he experiences strange visions each time their eyes meet and they touch one another. Fate plays a magnetic role, & keeps bringing them together. Are these visions a sign that they should stay away or stay together?

Genre: Angst, Fluff

Previous Part: Chapter Twenty  Next Part: Chapter Twenty Two 

4 Months Later

A few months after Maya signed the contract and joined SM Entertainment as a full time songwriter,  BTS was preparing for another comeback. BTS had almost accomplished every goal on their list, except they still had not been nominated for a Grammy yet. Therefore, this time they were eyeing the the Grammy nomination with their new album.

Members were still disoriented from the completion of their recent tour  but they knew they had to get right back to work to prepare for this comeback. One afternoon Namjoon had just returned from a walk and went to Yoongi’s studio to pitch a new idea he had for a song they were working on together. Namjoon knocked on the door and Yoongi opened immediately.

“Hey! I just got an-” Namjoon was about to explain his idea, when he heard a beautiful song playing on Yoongi’s stereo system. Few females were rapping and singing over a classical traditional Thai music. Namjoon was intrigued so he just stood there for a few moments listening to the lyrics. The lyrics seemed to be about how this woman was a party and she realized she had small stain on her dress, she tried to ignore the stain, hoping that no one would notice, but her own attention became so focused on the stain that she couldn’t enjoy the party. In fact, she became so paranoid that she was certain that the stain was getting bigger as time went by. Eventually she just left the party because of a stain that was so small that no one would have even noticed. Namjoon immediately recognized the metaphor of stain was about problems. People ignore the problem hoping for it to disappear on its on but in the back of the mind the problem remains and eventually gets bigger.

Namjoon was mesmerized by the song as a strange feeling of pain and familiarity took over him. The voices of the females were not familiar, but the message was.

Yoongi noticed Namjoon was busy listening to the song so he decided not to interrupt until the song finished. As soon as the song ended, Namjoon suddenly asked “Wow, what song was that?”

“Small Stain,” by The Crescent, Yoongi replied.

“That’s such a good song. I am definitely adding that to my playlist.” Namjoon responded.

“Yeah, guess which company the group is from.” Yoongi said.

“Which company?” Namjoon asked.

“SM” Yoongi replied. “This is their new rookie group. The Crescent”

“Huh, well who would have thought SM would debut a girl group like this.” Namjoon answered.

“Yeah, I guess we just have that type of effect on other companies.” Yoongi smirked.

“What do you mean?” Namjoon asked.

“A girl group with 7 girls with 3 rappers and 4 vocalists that sing about philosophy. Sound familiar?”

Namjoon wheezed. “Well, at least they are a girl group.” Namjoon shrugged and smiled.

“Yeah, very creative.” Yoongi gave a sarcastic response.

“Anyways, I was here to talk about the song we were working on.” Namjoon changed the topic.

Namjoon and Yoongi talked about the song and eventually Namjoon went back to his studio. Yoongi on the other hand went back to the album he was listening to by The Crescent. He became curious about this group and decided to look at who the producers were for these songs. It was then that Yoongi came across a familiar name in the credits of the album. The song he was listening to earlier was written by a woman named Maya Shroff.

Yoongi was shocked. He let out a gasp. He couldn’t believe his eyes, so he decided to look up her name. He needed to know if this was the same Maya. Surely this was some mistake or a coincidence. Why in the world would Maya ever work for SM? That would be completely absurd considering what had happened.

As Yoongi searched Maya’s name on the internet, he immediately came across her blog first. He clicked on the blog to see if there was something written there. But all he saw were her poems and short stories. No ads and no other information.

Then Yoongi saw her past interviews with both American and Korean shows. But none of them were recent so they didn’t mention where she was now. This were all from before when she got her Ph.D.

He then came across the website for Violet Inc., which indicated that she had recently signed a publishing deal with them for a book. Along with that information was her photo and short paragraph about her recent accomplishments.

Yoongi gulped after reading the description. The description mentioned that Maya was finished with her Ph.D. and she was Korea. But how does this relate to SM? Why would she work for SM when she was working on her book? Yoongi was about to give up on his search when he came across a Naver article from some months ago regarding Maya’s recent contract with SM. Yoongi’s heart slightly dropped as he clicked on the article.

Yoongi immediately closed the tab out sheer disbelief. Not only was Maya in Korea, but she did indeed join SM Entertainment. But why? Wasn’t she working on a book? None of this made sense. But the real question was, should he tell Namjoon? Would it be better for him to just pretend like he doesn’t know? The song Small Stain began playing in Yoongi’s head as he came up with the decision. If he ignored this stain, he knew it would only get bigger.

Yoongi sighed. Yoongi had previously known about Maya’s famous blog, but he had never mentioned it to Namjoon. It was an unspoken rule between the members to never mention her name. But this would be hard to do if she was now in the same industry as them. He realized that he needed to let Namjoon know. It was better if the news came from him than some page on the internet.

Yoongi went to Namjoon’s studio to spill the truth. He knocked on Namjoon’s studio door, but no one answered. Yoongi knocked again and after what seemed like an infinity, Namjoon finally opened the door with expressions that made it easy for Yoongi to realize that he was too late. Namjoon already knew. Namjoon knew who had written the song that he had just complimented a few minutes ago. He wished he hadn’t, but just like Yoongi, Namjoon’s curiosity had gotten the best of him, and so he had also stumbled upon the same Naver article that Yoongi had.

“Ah, sorry hyung. I was just-” Namjoon was about to make some excuse as to why it took him long to open the door, but Yoongi already knew.

“No, it’s okay. I...I know everything.” Yoongi nodded and confirmed.

Namjoon sulked back into his desk chair out of defeat. “She is here. She is really back.” Namjoon mumbled in almost an inaudible voice. His face was sickly pale. It was as if all the blood in his body had been drained. Yoongi had no idea what to do.

“Yeah...I didn’t know until-” Yoongi began to explain.

“I don’t know whether I should cry or laugh.” Namjoon interrupted. “Why does it feel like I have been somehow betrayed?” Namjoon continued.

Yoongi remained silent. He had no answer to Namjoon’s question.

“Then again, I deserve all this don’t I? I deserve all of it.” Namjoon let out another despairing sentence.

“No, you don’t. Whatever happened was in the past. You and her are….just on different paths now.” Yoongi gave a weak response.

“Ha, different paths? No, hyung. Don’t you see it? She is literally working in the same industry as us now. And not only that, she is working for SM? Of all the companies, she picked SM?” Namjoon covered his face with his hands out of frustration.

“I am sure she has her reasons. Don’t think too much about this. I am sure you won’t even ever have to see her since she is just a songwriter. It’s not like she became an idol.” Yoongi assured.

Namjoon didn’t say anything for a few moments, but then he suddenly started laughing. It wasn’t a funny laugh, it was angry laugh. “Wow, it all makes now.” Namjoon said after a pause in his laughter. “Hyung, it all makes sense.”

“What?” Yoongi was utterly confused by Namjoon’s reaction. He could see tears welling up in Namjoon’s eyes but on the other hand Namjoon was laughing.

“I know why she did this. I bet it was him. He is the one who convinced her.”

“Who?”

Namjoon didn’t answer. He couldn’t. He felt like the ground underneath him was slowly slipping away with the realization of his reality.

“Namjoonie, who are you talking about?” Yoongi asked again.

Namjoon gulped. “Junmyeon Sunbaenim.”

“Why would he want her to join...actually, nevermind.”Yoongi didn’t finish his thought as he knew where this was going.

“I guess she finally moved on from me. She is with him now, probably.” Namjoon was mumbling what they both already knew. Maya had probably moved on. She was probably with Junmyeon now. It made sense to Namjoon for her to be with Junmyeon considering how much he had supported her when Namjoon wasn’t there.

“Let’s not jump to conclusions. We don’t know why she is joining that company. I don’t know Maya very well, but I don’t think she is going to date another idol after what happened the last time. It would be silly.”

“Maybe so. But love can make us do very silly things, trust me. ” Namjoon replied in a grave tone.

“I hope she is happy. I know I am. I am very happy for her. ” Namjoon continued as a tear did escape his eyes. He quickly wiped it and turned his chair to face the computer again, which was still displaying the Naver article from earlier.

“Don’t think about this too much. Dwelling on something that is not in our control is pointless. It will only drain your energy.” Yoongi gave a piece of his wisdom knowing full well that Namjoon would still dwell on the issue anyways.

Yoongi was right. Namjoon did dwell on the news anyways. His mind could not let go of the fact that Maya was really back in Korea and that she was working with SM. It hurt. In fact, it almost hurt worse than breaking up. He felt betrayed because all the times that he had asked Maya if she wanted credit on the songs she had helped him with, she had refused. She would tell him that she didn’t need the credit. And now she was working with SM? Perhaps, this was karma. He deserved to feel this way after what he did to her. Besides, this was an amazing opportunity for her. She was clearly growing as a writer. If this is what made her happy, then who was he to stop her? He didn’t even have the right to feel hurt over this anymore. After all, he himself had chosen his career over her too.

Over the next few months Small Stain by The Crescent started spreading like an epidemic across the East and the West. Everywhere anyone went, they were bound to hear Small Stain. What shocked people the most was that it became the third song to chart on the Top 10 on Billboard Hot 100 at #8, after BTS’s  two title tracks charted at #10 and #1. In fact, it actually stayed there consistently even after digimon’s like Rihanna dropped her album. There was just something about the song that made everyone nostalgic and hyped at the same time. People didn’t need to understand the lyrics for it to be catchy, it just naturally became ingrained your head after the first listen. The Crescent also became one of the few rookies to get an Perfect All-Kill (PAK) on the Korean music charts.

Meanwhile, Maya’s blog began to gain even more traction from the fans of The Crescent. Suddenly, she was known as the “Word Wizard” on the internet as people started looking up the lyrics to her songs on the album. In fact, those publishing companies that had retracted their offers after seeing Maya, started offering her a new deal for her next book again. Nonetheless, Maya made sure not to let it get to her head. She wrote Small Stain and other songs on the album, just to pay her bills. She knew she would always be a poet and a fiction writer before she was a songwriter.

Overall, she was grateful that this whole deal with SM worked out, even though during the process of working with SM, she was realizing more and more of all the politics that went on in the Korean music industry. Up until now, she had heard things from Junmyeon about the industry, but now she was slowly becoming a part of it.

One morning in November, Maya received an email invite to MAMA awards. Maya didn’t think too much of it and disregarded the invite completely. That was until later that day, when her phone started buzzing while she was eating lunch. Maya looked at the screen and realized it was Junmyeon. She put down her plate of food and picked up the phone.

“Hello” Maya answered.

“Hey, Congratulations!! Sorry I was in a middle of the shoot earlier so couldn’t call” Junmyeon replied.

“Thanks! But what are you congratulating me for?” Maya asked out of confusion.

Junmyeon laughed. “You are so funny! Nice try! But I am not falling for your joke.”

“I am  not joking though. What are congratulating me for?” Maya felt her heartbeat starting to raise.

“Maya, have you not seen the nominee list?” Junmyeon asked.

“Which one? Wait are you talking about the MAMA invite? Yeah, I saw that, but I didn’t see the nominee list.” Maya clarified.

“Well, check again!” Junmyeon demanded.

Maya laughed. “Alright, alright I am looking. Give me a second!”

Maya went to her room and opened up her laptop to pull up the email again. She once again read through the invitation and then she finally saw the attached nominee list. Maya opened the list, wondering what was in there.

That’s when she saw her name. Maya Shroff, Lyricist of the Year. Her breath hitched as she read the sentence again.

“Oh, I guess I am on the list. But I don’t understand. Does this mean I am nominated?” Maya asked after a few seconds.

“No, actually they already announced your name as a winner. They usually just announce the winners for technical and producing awards. But, they’ll still call you up on stage to get the award.”

“What? So this means I won?” Maya asked the question again, almost out of disbelief.

“Yes, you did! That’s why I am congratulating you!” Junmyeon tried to remind Maya his original reason for calling her in the first place.

Maya just sat there in disbelief. “Wow, who would have thought that I would get an award for writing songs. This is crazy.” Maya said. She was lacking enthusiasm.

“How come you don’t seem very happy?” Junmyeon questioned.

“Because, I guess I still haven’t gotten used to being in this industry...” Maya often felt guilty working with SM. She couldn’t completely pinpoint the reason the why, but being part of SM’s “innovative team” made her feel uncomfortable at times. When they were working on making The Crescent’s album, the team of producers and creatives mainly always talked about making it in America and breaking through in the West. Every meeting consisted of plans and strategies to make sure that The Crescent ended up on the Billboard charts, instead of talking about music. Maya was happy that those strategies and plans worked out, but then again, was this really the point of the album? Was this the point of being a songwriter, choreographer, or producer?Winning this award was exciting, but it made Maya feel like it was not because of her lyrics, but rather because this is was part of the strategies and marketing.

“I am not sure what you mean, but in my opinion, this is an amazing achievement. It’s like everything you touch turns to gold.” Junmyeon laughed.

Maya rolled her eyes. “Ah, I wouldn’t say that. Perhaps, those surrounded by gold are often the lonliest. I am just grateful to have you and Han Bi” Maya said as she started skimming through the nominee list again. She wanted to know whether EXO was nominated or not. After all, she needed to cheer them on, just like Junmyeon had cheered for her till now. She remembered suddenly that last year EXO had not won any daesangs, and it truly broke Junmyeon’s heart. She hoped this year it would be different.

Maya skimmed the list, and found EXO’s name under the all 3 daesang categories: Song of the Year, Album of the Year, and Artist of the Year. Of course, alongside EXO were none other than BTS and The Crescent. Maya saw the names and immediately closed the document, as she realized something she had never given any thought to till now. Something that her conscious mind had completely disregarded till now. It finally hit Maya that she was now BTS’s competitor.

It finally hit her that she really was in the same industry as BTS. Oh god, what had she done. How could she have been so oblivious to the fact that by working with SM, she was essentially working against BTS. The album that she had written songs on was breaking records that were previously set by BTS. Her song was currently charting right alongside BTS’s song. She wondered if BTS knew about this. Did they know she had joined SM? Did they know she was back? She wondered how they would feel if they saw her. If he saw her.

“Maya, are you there?” Junmyeon asked.

“Hmm?”

“What happened? You went completely silent for a few seconds.” Junmyeon asked.

“Oh...umm...nothing...umm...I was just looking at the list and I see that EXO is nominated for all the daesang categories! Oppa, I am so so proud of you! Congratulations!” Maya replied.

Junmyeon went silent this time.

“What’s wrong?” Maya asked.

“Maya, we are nominated alongside The Crescent and BTS, do you really think we will win? The boys and I have accepted our fate. But thanks anyways!”

“What? What do you mean? Of course you can win! EXO has the longest streak of being million sellers. You can’t deny the success. Besides, your song was charting on the Hot 100 too!”

“Yeah, I guess we’ll see. Anyways, I guess I will see you at the award ceremony.” Junmyeon changed the topic. He felt like talking about it would somehow make him feel worse.

“Umm...I don’t think I’ll go.” Maya replied.

“What? Why?” Junmyeon asked.

“I just don’t feel right. Besides, it’s not like I am idol.” Maya explained.

“Oh gosh, don’t tell me it’s because of them.” Junmyeon responded as he referred to BTS as them.

“My goal of doing this was to prove to myself and the industry that my skin doesn’t define my ability to be a good writer. And I already did that. What’s the point of me going?” Maya defended.

“Well, I hope you know it’s in your contract. You are required to attend events that promote the album and that do not conflict with other schedules” Junmyeon responded.

“What?” Maya was in disbelief. She had forgotten the conditions that were listed in the contract. She could feel herself panic.

“You can look it up.” Junmyeon answered. “You being there would be great publicity for SM, so I am sure they are going to make you go.”

“But I don’t want to…” Maya insisted.

“Maya the announcers  might even invite you on the stage during the technical award ceremony, don’t you want to receive the award yourself? Look, if you think they are going to come bother you, I promise they won’t. I’ll make sure they don’t even come near you” Junmyeon assured. Again “they” was in reference to BTS.

“No, that’s not what I am afraid of. Seeing them again is just going to make things complicated. I don’t want that. It’s going to hurt him so much if sees me. I don’t even know if he knows that I am back.” Maya broke down finally. All these years and she couldn’t help but think about how Namjoon would feel to see her again. She had told herself and him that they would never see each other again, but now she herself was failing at staying away from him.

“Maya it’s been years. People in our industry break up all the time and they still see each other. I mean he even probably runs into Ji Hyu all the time and they dated longer than you and him did.” Poor Junmyeon was oblivious to the whole ‘98% in-sync’ part. He had no idea that Namjoon and Maya were connected much more deeply. He had no idea how much the universe had to plan to get them together the first time.

“Yeah I guess that’s true. Perhaps, he has moved on, but I haven’t. Seeing him again would probably break whatever little courage I have mustered up so far.” Maya gave an honest response.

“But what if seeing him ends up making you stronger? You knew going in this would happen,right? You knew you would run into him eventually, so why is it bothering you now?” Junmyeon was just confused. To him it was just seeing an ex again. Sure, it would hurt, but he would never avoid an entire event just to avoid them. It didn’t make sense to him why Maya was questioning all of this now, when she was the one who wanted to join the industry anyways.

“I honestly never thought this far.  I didn’t know the album and song would end up doing so well. I had no idea that the whole SM team was actually going to successfully break into the West. I just wrote the songs and that’s it.”

“Then accept it as fate. If you avoid him the way he avoided you, you are repeating the same cowardness he showed years ago. Besides, I am pretty sure SM will make sure you enforce this contract because this will benefit them. Trust me. Why do you think we all attend these ceremonies? It’s not because we want to. It’s because it’s required.” Junmyeon reminded Maya.

Maya didn’t respond at first. It was starting to feel like her small decision to join SM had turned into a complicated scheme of bringing her face to face with her biggest fear. Was she ready to face him again? Perhaps, Junmyeon was right that it was fate.

“Oppa, why did I do this to myself? Why didn’t I think this through before?” Maya felt frustrated.

“Because you are growing and with each step you are bound to face new challenges.”

“Well, either this event is going to make me stronger than ever before or it's going to  break me into  pieces.” Maya said with her voice half-audible.

Junmyeon smirked. “Either ways, Han Bi and I will be there afterwards.”

December

The day arrived when most of the Korean music industry gathered in Japan for another year of MAMA awards. The whole spectacle included the technical awards, the red carpet, and then finally the usual telecasted music awards. Maya had initially thought she would only be required to stay for the technical awards, but of course, the event manager insisted that she stay for the red carpet and the actual ceremony. For the technical awards, Maya was seated with the other members of the SM team that were involved with the making of The Crescent’s album. The idols were not present for those as these awards were not really telecasted. Maya was honestly relieved to hear that.

Names started being announced of all the winners. For these awards the winners were already decided so there was no need for nominee announcement. Almost all members of the The Crescent’s production team received an award. Except the choreographer award went to BTS’s choreographer Son Sungdeuk and the producer of the year award went to BTS’s producer PDogg, once again. Thankfully neither one of them really knew much about Maya, so they didn’t really give her any attention. Maya on the other hand couldn’t decide whether she should feel upset or happy that those awards went to BTS instead of her team. Finally, the time came when her name was announced as the lyricist of the year.

Maya slowly stood up and went up to the stage. She was grateful she didn’t need to give a speech, because for these awards they only usually took pictures, and there were no speeches. She just went on to the stage and accepted the award. Those that didn’t know her gasped when they saw her, some looked confused, while others were in awe.

Maya went back to her seat afterwards and stayed till the end of the technical awards. Then the award show staff signaled her to go backstage so that she could prepare for her red carpet appearance.

Soon the red carpet started with celebrities appearing one after another. BTS appeared and walked towards the MC, who was there to assist the media representatives and also ask them questions for the journalists.

The MC handed each member a microphone, before beginning the question portion of the ceremony.

“Good evening, gentleman! How are you all feeling tonight?” The MC asked.

BTS begin by introducing themselves, followed by Namjoon’s response. “Good evening! We are very excited to be here again on this auspicious occasion. We always look forward to this night, as MAMA awards do hold a special place in our heart.” Namjoon explained.

“Yes, you gentleman always leave us with some memorable moments, so tell us, what can we expect from you tonight. We know you are performing, so could you tell us a little bit about your performance?” the MC asked.

This time Hoseok took over the question. “Yes, we don’t want to spoil too much, but I will say this performance is focusing on emotions of nostalgia and regret. These two elements have been our theme recently, so we’ll incorporate those emotions in our performance tonight.”

“Ah, that sounds very exciting!” The MC enthusiastically responded.

“Yes, I would also like to add, as always we also have hints for our future work hidden in our performance, so please anticipate it.” Yoongi added.

“Oh wow, I feel like the audience will definitely have the eyes glued to their screens now.” The MC joked. “Alright, gentlemen, I will see you in the ceremony. Thank you for your wonderful interview!” The MC concluded the interview and the members went inside the venue towards their seat.

A few more celebrities were interviewed, followed by Maya’s red carpet appearance. She was quite unprepared for this as this was decided last minute that she would be staying for the entire award ceremony. She was half-panicked and fully unprepared for this interview. First, as with every idol and celebrity, the media people took her pictures. Then the MC began the interview with Maya.

“Good evening, Dr. Shroff” The MC introduced Maya as Dr. Shroff, which caught her off guard. She was not used to being called that.

“Oh, good evening to you too!” Maya replied. She felt completely out of place and frazzled. Her mind was going a million miles per hour and she felt like she would fall any second. Why was she  here? How did this happen? She was just supposed to be in the background. She just wanted a side job while she wrote her book. Why in the world did she agree to do this?

“Thank you. It’s really our pleasure to have you here tonight. How are you feeling about being here at the MAMA awards?” the MC asked with a bright smile. It was becoming more and more obvious to the MC that Maya was feeling very nervous, so the MC tried to keep a positive and friendly vibe to help Maya calm down.

“Oh...thanks….I mean...I mean... the pleasure is truly mine. I...I feel honored to be amongst such great artists. I….I was not expecting this invitation at all…” Maya was stuttering as she was having trouble breathing.

“I assume you have already started your celebration, since earlier this evening you won the prestigious Lyricist of the Year award for The Crescent’s debut album, right?” the MC stated.

“Ah, yes, definitely! Working on the songs for The Crescent has been such great learning opportunity for me as a writer. I feel….I feel proud of our team that worked on the album.” Maya was saying whatever that came to mind to keep the interview going.

“Now, of course as a songwriter and novelist, we know you won’t performing tonight, but are you excited to see any performances?” the MC asked an innocent question, but little did they know how hard this question really was for Maya.

Maya debated what to say. Should she just say The Crescent? Or would that sound too arrogant? Should she say EXO? But then what if the media interprets that the wrong way? She definitely can’t say BTS for obvious reasons. Wonder if she can get away with just saying that she was excited to see everyone.

“Uh, well...I am honestly excited to see everyone perform tonight. They are all so talented and I feel very grateful to even get a chance like this.”

“Oh, we should be the ones who are grateful to have you here. We are greatly excited for your new book that you working on and maybe the new songs that hopefully you’ll bring in the future. Hope you’ll enjoy your evening. Thank you!” The MC bowed and concluded the interviewed.

Maya internally let out a sigh of relief. “Thank you so much for you great wishes.” Maya bowed back and went towards the venue once the interview ended.

Inside the venue most of the idols were already seated. Taehyung was socializing with his idol friends that he had not had a chance to see in a long time, Yoongi was blankly staring at the stage perhaps contemplating some life lessons, while Jungkook and Seokjin were both playing a game on their phones. Namjoon, Jimin, and Hoseok were talking about their performance later that night, because Namjoon wasn’t feeling too well.

“Did you take your medicine?” Hoseok asked Namjoon.

“I did. I just need to make it through tonight.” Namjoon replied. He had suddenly fallen sick the night before, and he really couldn’t understand why. He kept coughing and his head and stomach were aching quite badly. He just felt weak and dizzy, as if he would collapse any moment.

“Hyung, you should have stayed at the hotel. What if something happens on the stage?” Jimin replied.

“Maybe you should rest backstage until our performance, do you think that will help?” Hoseok suggested.

Namjoon was tempted to follow Hoseok’s suggestion.

“Yes, that’s a great idea.” Jimin agreed.

“C’mon, let’s get you backstage, alright?” Hoseok said.

Namjoon nodded.

Hoseok got up from his seat and him and Namjoon went backstage.

Meanwhile, the rest of the members tried to socialize a bit more, as they waited for the rest of the guests to enter the venue.

Yoongi and Seokjin were talking to members of Day6 when they saw a familiar figure walking inside the venue. Yoongi and Seokjin both tried to clear their eyes, making sure this incredulous sight was real. However, no matter how many times they blinked and tried to rub their eyes to clear their vision, the view did not change. The person they were seeing was indeed really there.

Yoongi mumbled a series of curse words under his breath.

“Crap! Seokjin joined.

“This can’t be real. This isn’t real right.” Seokjin turned to Yoongi, almost begging Yoongi to essentially tell him he was dreaming.

“It’s definitely real…” Yoongi replied much to Seokjin’s dismay.

By this point the other members, except Hoseok and Namjoon who were backstage, had also noticed the person that had entered the venue. All of the members immediately returned to their seats and looked at each other, as if they were trying to figure out an escape plan.

“Guys, what should we do?” Taehyung asked with both sadness and warmth on his face.

“Looks like the stain just got bigger…” Yoongi said referencing the song Small Stain.

No one responded to Yoongi at first, because they were too busy staring at Maya Shroff, as she found her seat in the back of all the idols. All the members knew Maya was back in Korea, but none of them had expected her to come to the award show. They were all shocked that she was somehow invited to stay for the whole award show.

A wave of cold air suddenly passed through the venue when Maya’s eyes accidentally met BTS members, causing Maya to shudder. She immediately looked away and began talking to some of the other producers sitting next to her, that were also asked to stay during the whole event.

“No, I think the stain was always bigger than we thought…” Jimin gave a painfully witty response to Yoongi’s earlier reference. He suddenly felt a surge of guilt take over him again as he remembered the day years ago at Maya’s apartment when he had delivered Namjoon’s cruel message. Till this day he could not forget how he had left Maya in such a lifeless state. He had never told the other members the sight he had witnessed, but honestly, he felt as if he had a killed person that day. Of course, as fate would have it, he was now seeing that person alive again.

Jimin was right. The stain of Namjoon and Maya’s story was always bigger than anyone had anticipated. Till now both sides had ignored this stain, hoping that it would disappear on its own, but as Maya’s song suggests, trying to hide the stain will only attract more attention towards it. So then what should they do? Hide, run, or embrace?

[ktaebwi]

I’ll try to make this as simple as possible for those who aren’t familiar with field terms, please note that this is only my interpretation from my knowledge and experience and it might not be 100% similar to Bighit and the design firm’s original ideas.

So BTS and ARMY got a new brand identity. What is brand identity? Brand identity is the identity, the core, motives and goals of the brand, basically everything that makes the brand itself represented in a visual aspect. Logo(s) is one of the most important parts of the brand identity.

This is BTS’ previous logo:

Why this logo no longer suits BTS:

• This logo is made specifically based on the meaning of BTS’ name in Korean, 방탄소년단 (Bulletproof Boy Scouts) taking the image of a bulletproof vest as the base • Technically speaking, it’s not really a practical logo. Too many small details lead to difficulty when used in small scale and used as strokes. • It’s created 4 years ago and the logo trend has changed a lot since then, going more towards minimalism (simpler logos). • Most importantly, it can only represent BTS in debut days. The bulletproof vest stands for “guarding against prejudice and oppression against the youth in their 10s and 20s”. But BTS’ success and achievement have far made them become more than that. They are not only simply defending prejudice and oppression but also offering consolation and hope for the youth as well as everyone else to move forward. This logo isn’t able to express that.

And so they changed BTS’ brand identity and not only did BTS get a new logo, our fandom, ARMY, got one too. (left: BTS, right: ARMY)

Why the new logo suits BTS:

“BTS’ new BI shows that they aren’t satisfied with the realities and symbolize their youth that is opening the door and stepping out in order to further grow, while their fanclub ARMY is visualized as the reflection of BTS’ youth that meets the members as they open the door. The meaning of the brand has expanded as a concept that merges the past and future. Since their debut, BTS has continuously expressed themselves as “boys blocking the oppression and prejudice that teens face” and have added that the meaning of “Beyond The Scene” is “youth that is not satisfied with the current reality and will pursue their dream without rest in order to grow”.” (Source: 매일경제 via Naver, Eng: Christie & Kylie @ allforbts)

• It’s a minimal logo design which has been the trend in the design field in recent years, with many big names changing their logo/brand identity like Google, Microsoft, Yahoo, DeviantArt, Uber, PayPal, even in the Korean entertainment industry, we have YG Entertainment who changed their brand identity 4 years ago too. These are all for the purpose of catching up with the trend and renew themselves for a fresher and more suitable image for the company’s direction in the future and current success. Minimal logos have more practical use when it comes to digital and print design. This shows that BTS is catching up the flow of the times and not caught up in the past. The design is also developed from BTS’ old logo (the bulletproof vest one), the negative space between two shapes represents the front zip of the bulletproof vest. At the same time, it also resembles two panels of a door, symbolizing the action of open a door to move forward to the future, to a new beginning of BTS. This logo is an infusion of the past and the present, the future of BTS, they still stay rooted to their base but don’t dwell on the past, they are not satisfied with what they achieved and will continue to go higher.

• When flipped 90°, the logo resembles a door with a source of light ahead, meaning that when BTS opens this new chapter, there will be a bright future awaiting for them.

• The logo of ARMY is a reflection of BTS’ logo. Here’s a simple animation to show how BTS and ARMY’s logos are connected:

BTS and ARMY’s logos are reflection of each other representing the mutual influence of us and BTS. BTS give us music, hope, determination, ambition, dreams, energy and happiness, and we too are their source of strength, the reason they keep developing themselves to get better and better. As BTS always say, BTS exist because of ARMY and we ARMY are also a part of BTS. The overall shape of ARMY’s logo resembles a shield, meaning we will be the one to protect and shield them against the prejudice and hatred towards them.

• Another reason why I say this is a great logo is because, there are many ways to combine these two logos together. Two of them are:

- When putting BTS’ logo in between ARMY’s logo, it becomes two shields. We are protecting, embracing BTS, but at the same time they’re also protecting us, together we double the strength. - When separating the pieces of each logo and arranging them vertically side by side, they become the symbol of a grand door, the kind of door usually seen in palaces and is commonly used to represent the Gate of Heaven. BTS and ARMY side by side will head to higher places with higher goals.

[phangjinglin]

Blogpost 5: Work and user generated content (Phang Jing Lin)

In Social Media as a Participatory Culture, Fuchs (2013) criticises Henry Jenkins’ arguments about participatory culture. Fuchs highlights that Jenkins has a reductionist concept of media participation. He mentions how Jenkins reduces the notion of participation to a dimension that focuses on culture and thus neglects the notion of participatory democracy and its effects on the internet. Fuchs (2013) believes that “an Internet that is dominated by corporations that accumulate capital by exploiting and commodifying users can never, in the theory of participatory democracy, be participatory and the cultural expressions of it cannot be expressions of participation”. He then mentions that Jenkins has missed out on ownership as an important part of participation and fails to consider aspects of class and capitalism. Regarding fan culture and politics, Fuchs (2013) argues that Jenkins has assumed an automatic connection of fandom in popular culture and political protest. Furthermore, Fuchs mentions how Jenkins does not touch on the negative potentials and realities of online communities and cultural communities and the concept of participatory culture have been a focus on “community involvement”, as Jenkins sees community and fan culture as progressive and ignores the fact that the collective intelligence and activity of cultural communities and fandom could possibly develop into online fascism. Also, Fuchs pointed out that Jenkins did not consider the importance of money in the economy and argue against how Jenkins suggests that that the exploitation of users' digital labour is not problematic if they enjoy what they are doing on the platform.

I disagree with Fuchs (2013) that an internet that is dominated by corporations can never be participatory. There are many corporations today that gives users opportunities to participate in the production of media content through user-generated content while taking into account their economic well-being. For instance, I often read webtoon online on Webtoon app/website, which is free for anyone to access and read. I recently found out that Webtoon, which is owned by Naver Corporation, encourages user-generated content through their Webtoon Canvas, an open platform where anyone can draw and publish their own comic to share with others. They also offer several opportunities and options for creators to monetise their content (e.g. through Patreon integration), and creators can earn 50% from ads displayed on their comic series based on their performance (e.g. hitting a certain number of views and subscribers). I feel that as more people and big corporations become more aware of issues of exploitation and free labour today, they also start to care more about the economic well-being and gains of these users and ensure that they are benefiting as well, so that it is a win-win situation for both sides: more content means more users on the platform and at the same time, monetary benefits/gains for creators. This phenomenon could also be observed for youtubers and influencers, where having a full-time job as a youtuber or an influencer is becoming more widely acceptable and legitimate, because these people can earn a lot of money, especially when big brands reach out to collaborate with them because of their influence and content. Thus, big corporations today are also taking into account giving more agency to users, although it is still limited as these corporations ultimately still have more power and the final say when it comes to making decisions.

References

Fuchs, C. (2013). Social media as participatory culture. Chapter 3 in Social media: A critical introduction. Thousand Oaks, Calif: SAGE. Pp. 52-66.

[mangafeeds]

Gisou Furin.

Alternative: Disguised Adultery; Fake Affair; 偽装不倫; 위장불륜

Description : Shoko has turned 30 and she has finally given up on finding a marriage partner. Recently having completed a year long contract, she wants to explore the freedom her lack of relationship and job obligations afford her and books a trip to Seoul, Korea. Unencumbered, she wants to visit the Korean BBQ restaurants alone and drink to celebrate her "graduation from marriage seeking activities." Not quite supportive is her sister, one who is already married to a good-looking, high earning man, who thinks Shoko should do the responsible thing and give marriage hunting a shot again. But Shoko cannot be deterred. But life has a strange way of turning things around. On her trip to Seoul, Shoko makes a surprising discovery, and an unexpected connection... This is a collaborative project between Higashimura Akiko and NAVER webtoon, which may be the first of its kind, at least involving such a luminary figure in manga. It is being released in Korean and Japanese, but not quite simul-release. Korean is about 20 chapters ahead. #MangaFeeds.com, #ReadFreeMangaOnline MangaFeeds.Com: Read manga online the latest manga comic book, updated daily: https://mangafeeds.com/post/gisou-furin_1587915992

Read more.

[kaotikreviews]

WEBTOONs Time

Since I’ve found the platform, I’ve been nothing but OBSESSED. I’ve read a lot of different webtoons by now, and caught up with several. The highlight of each day has become 9pm when the newest batch of webtoons come out. 👌🏼

Today, I read the new episodes for my subscribed comics. Here are my thoughts (WARNING - may contain spoilers):

At Arms Length, by Zushi - Chapter 9.2, Trapped: I recently found this series and binged all the previous episodes, so the story still feels fresh in my memory. This comic is unique because it tells you up front the two characters that end up together and let’s you know they are healthy and happy later on. The author uses a pretty slow story progression towards that end and focuses on emotions and mental health in each episode. Since the comic is more about processing thoughts and feelings, the pace of real world events is much slower. Even so, the epis feel a bit too short (but the art is amazing, so I get it). Full disclosure, it looks like this series can get a bit raunchy at times. 👀 I was a bit torn about this comic because of my own morals and world views (I really want to say the main characters need Jesus AND all the healthy things they are doing👌🏼), but a lot of the episodes about depression really resonated with me since that’s something I’ve struggled with for literally my whole life. Long story short, I’m hooked, so 💁🏻‍♀️. Today’s epi is more of the female lead’s back story and her previous relationship. I guess it was good. I’ve literally never been in a romantic relationship, so can’t relate to the situation directly, but it’s just one of the many reasons why I wanna be forever alone. 😳 I think I always refresh like a lunatic hoping for one more episode at the end, but today’s episode did feel pretty short. Then again, every time I catch up on a webtoon, the episodes that come out after that always feel short anyway. 😂

WEBTOON GREENLiGHT - Escape from Oz: tbh, I’m not the biggest fan of the art style and the surreal take on the storyline threw me for a loop at first, but also, super hooked ngl. 😏 I love a good sci-fi. I mean, we are in the world of fantasy and fiction and break real world rules CONSTANTLY, so why not just lean in and go crazy with it? 😌 I bet you guessed, but 3rd epi definitely got a fancy 🤍 from me and now I’m hoping for it to get green lit so I can find out what happens next! 👀

My Magical Maid - Ep 9: another recent find, it only took me a couple minutes to catch up and be wanting more. 🤩 As mentioned before, fiction/sci-fi is my jam. I can get weird about witchy story lines if they wanna be really like creepy and demonic and offensive to my beliefs and world views, but if it’s balanced enough, its nbd to me. I like the series because I like stories with people with powers. How fun would it be to have super powers? It’s fun to imagine, so I love seeing other people’s takes on a day in the life of a super. Our super (a witch in this particular story world), is a maid/personal secretary type person/doctor/friend of the ruler of the land. The relationships and interactions feel very modern, but the setting is like, fairy tale times. Like, our girl is supposed to be a maid, but she’s on peer terms with the king and can speak her mind openly. It’s different, so I like it. Very interesting dynamics, I can’t wait to find out more about their back stories. Today, they closed up a story arch that threatened our otp but now.. does that make our main dude an even badder guy? lol 🧐 I mean, second lead just made main dude look kinda awful in comparison. And I never get second lead syndrome, so this is a bit of a strange perspective for me. (I don’t get second lead syndrome because the otp has a pull to it. Good relationships take time, but also chemistry.) I’m not opposed to a bad boy redemption story, so super excited to see this all play out and glad the triangle is going away. 😅 I have no idea what this gif is from, but it looks cool so ~

Lost in Translation - Ep 18: I mean, is every comic coming out this year gonna be bout stalkers?! 👀 Today’s epi was wyld (haha, pun). After reading the beginning of #killstagram and starting up It’s Mine, this plot twist is starting to feel super familiar. There’s been a stalker story arch in several other comics in my deck as well. Can’t say I’m a big fan, tbh. I hate the fact that things like that really happen, and the fact that it could happen to me or someone I care about. I’m terrible for this, but I prefer not to think about the grittier and scarier side of humanity too much. Of course, I said “too much”. A little here and there isn’t so bad, and so overall, I’m still pretty hooked on this comic. Hopefully things start to improve for our MC soon, and I’m so glad he’s getting some support from his friend.

I Love Yoo - Ep 127: bout time we got back to the sister arch! 😂 I binged this to catch up a while ago now, and so the story is starting to fade a bit. It still blows my mind how far we’ve come in the story and yet how little progress we’ve made. I mean, the family dynamic hasn’t been sorted yet, and I’m missing the friend dude, the one with red hair (I think?) yeah, it’s been so long I am forgetting his name already! 😅 I normally am super against any form of “stealing” people in relationships, but when the relationships are super toxic and bad, I sometimes find myself shipping the better relationship. (Jim and Pam from the office for example.) Truth be told, the main girl and the red head are my favorite ship, and I hope it’s the otp. All the other dudes in her life just don’t compare to the tension, chemistry, and mutual respect those two have. They bring out the best in each other and redhead really needs some help just like our MC did in the beginning. I hope she reaches out to him more (and that he ends that shell of a ship he is currently in.)

Choco Latte - Ep 38: another recent find. It’s a silent comic, which is kinda brilliant. Sometimes I read ahead on my favorite comics on Naver in the original language, but since I only really know English, it’s a very similar experience to this comic. You rely more on the expressions and context to understand the situations and how the story is progressing. I like it. I also liked how wholesome all the characters are. There isn’t a lot of nastiness between people so far and I hope that continues. It’s refreshing given the world we live in and most of the comic I read, tbh. Recent epis (including today’s) have me a bit worried tho. I hope they ain’t breaking main ship 😬 or creating a rift that would destroy the innocence and optimistic world view of our MCs. I’m a pretty gritty, glass half empty type of person a lot of times, and I call it being a realist. Fact is, life is often cruel. But in story world, it doesn’t have to be. I hope the author preserves the sweetness of this comic, but even if not, I’m down for the ride. (Unless they break up the otp, then I may quit for real.)

Not Even Bones - so I haven’t been reading this on webtoons for a while. I found out there was a book, and when it hit a cliffhanger, I scoured the internet until I found it online for free. I finished the book in a very short period of time and then the sequel. There’s still another one out that I want to read, but I needed a break. Not sure where the webtoons version is at, but I mean, this story gets DARK. Wondering how I reconcile this with all my aforementioned morals? I don’t. I believe all humans are kinda terrible, which is why I believe we need saving from ourselves and each other. I don’t believe all the stories with hopeful endings and super hero’s and saviors are just from our wishful thinking, I believe that a part of our souls is wired to respond and reach for our creator, who is actively speaking and reaching for us. Since we’ve been effectively “kidnapped” and trapped in a broken world system, it’s like we are birds that were born in cages. It’s in our nature to do certain things that just don’t make sense for our current environment but makes total sense for the environment we were created for. I believe it’s in our nature to search for something that’s missing and to fill that void with whatever and whoever we can find - many people think it’s just the way things are and don’t think about why, or they become contented with the void inside. No matter what we try to use to fill that emptiness inside, it’s never enough. Well, not until we connect to our creator and escape from “captivity”. I’ve been a Christ follower my whole life and even so, it ain’t easy. I have mad depression and I’m not necessarily a “good” person. But I’d probably be dead if I didn’t have Jesus in my life, and that’s after doing all the self help I could. No matter what I did, it wasn’t enough until I experienced hope and love for the first time in a spiritual experience. 👌🏼 I mean, if humans are terrible, and we all are constantly trying to self destruct, who can truly help us but God? People can’t be the cure for other people, and as much as self help stuff, well, helps - it isn’t a cure either. Self help can be like relying on a flaky and unstable individual to save your life - eek! 😂

For the record, my goal isn’t to stuff my beliefs down people’s throats, just sharing my thoughts. If you find it offensive, then please skip on by or think of it as a nice story (but for me, it’s as real as breathing, so I can’t help but talk about it. 👌🏼)

Anyone else reading these comics? What are your thoughts? Are there other comics that you recommend? Are there any that you fast passed on? I was super tempted to fast pass a few, but I hate having to wait longer for a new update. 😂

Today’s top song (thanks for sending it to me, sis! 💯):