#fuck this is another completely separate essay isn't it

[ancientrimer]

i can't believe this keeps happening to me. i figure out a theory i think i might want to apply in my thesis, go look at the text that has the theory, and find that that text already mentions jane eyre

[collgeruledzebra]

very likely i just missed the boat on this one but it seems wild that there isn't much discussion about the fact that blood mixing with silvertree ink creates unusual magic? tbf it was maybe one line but this might be the single most significant reveal of the series so far imo and it casts practically the entire main conflict in a new light. it's a far better justification for the separation of medicine and magic than beldaruit's 'balance' claim and definitely more than the general 'all forbidden magic is equally forbidden Because' and yet this is literally the first time it's ever been mentioned. i would honestly be willing to bet that knowledge about it was lost completely since the pact, or at least deliberately contained to only a small sect of witches like a Secret-within-the-Secret (which would be REALLY cool to explore tbh)

i also think it's interesting because it's been demonstrated that the effects of blood not only have the potential to be dangerous in and of themselves, they're unpredictable, which is pretty much antithetical to the current state of magic as it is built on consistent design principles that are known to produce certain results if drawn correctly (another point to the magic / modern science essay which i think i'm going to actually have to write soon but anyways) uhh in conclusion really really intrigued where this could go in terms of magical society and general conventions in magic. i hope there's a cover up effort by the security council and it turns soooo messy and ugly <3 cmon girlies let's blow this fucking thing wide open

[anonymous-bastard]

15-minute cities

I have been enabled by @hinata-rosario-revamped and @transdimensional-evildorito

Most of this will be under the cut because I'm not a monster that spams people with text blocks.

Edit: uh I did n o t plan to post this yet lol. I'll leave this up and like, nothing I say here is wrong but I'm not sure how coherent it is yet and I wanted to add some more stuff, I'll take a proper look tomorrow.

So short tldr on the concept of the fifteen minute city: basically, the idea that all anemities of daily life should be reachable within fifteen minutes and without use of a car.

Got it? Good.

So you will realise what it isn't is, is a government conspiracy to lock people into ghettos. If you start coming at me with that bullshit in my comment section or askbox I will eat you. I have no patience for that brand of bullshit.

Aaaaaaaaaanyway. Let's do this.

To understand why the idea of the 15 Minute city gained popularity, you need to understand why the cities of today are the way they are. Where I will take this moment to subtly point the finger at the Athens charta.

The Athens charta codified two ideas relevant to us: the car-centric city and the functional separation within cities.

The car-centric city is basically what the names implied: cities, build and restructured in such a way to prioritise travel by car. It was based on the belief that the automobile would replace all other forms of transports, including walking, even for short distances. This resulted, especially in the US, in the reduction and abolishment of public transport and a loss of cities walkability.

"Functional separation" is just a fancy way of saying the Charta wanted for cities to separate industrial areas, living areas, shopping areas etc (= the different 'functions' within the city). This was achieved by zoning regulation.

These ideas were standard practice for decades until people went wait... this is complete and utter trash.

The idea behind car-centric design as that soon, peope would no longer need to walk anywhere, they'd always simply take the car, even for short distances.

The problem with car-centric design is it makes the city an incredibly unsafe place, because cars are incredibly unsafe. It makes walking and biking dangerous and uncomfortable. It means excluding people without a car from participation in society. Also there are parked cars everywhere, which believe it or not is an incredible nuisance to city planners. I could probably write a 1000 word essay on why car-centric design is bad alone.

Separating life and work by a long distance results in ridiculously long commutes, a lot of time spent just sitting in a car. It also results in needing to built car infrastructure in such a way that they can handle rush hour and results in traffic jams. Another factor is that, especially in North America, it really lengthened the distance to things such as the grocery store, doctors, restaurants, etc.

Now caveat: there is sense in separating living areas from industrial ones, because they are loud, smelly and unhealthy. But there is no sense not to allow a grocery store next to the people that buy their groceries there.

After urban planners realised hey, we fucked this up, new ideas and guiding principles startd to emerge.

One of them is the 15-minute-city, which presents a direct antithesis to the ideas I just explained.

Like I mentioned, the idea is simple: daily amenities, reachable within 15 minutes (one way), no cars. Daily ammenities include: work, school, groceries, hobbies, doctors, exercise etc.

This sound simple, but it actually requires a lot of restructuring of the city.

Like I mentioned, especially in North American cities, daily ammenties simply Are Not that close by. They need to be shifted back into the communities they serve, so instead of driving to the restaurant for half an hour, you are there within ten minutes by foot. This requires massive rezoning and rewriting of zoning regulation in general.

What it also includes is a massive increase in pedestrian and biking infrastructure. This is a basic requirement for the 15-city to work. Without good pedestrian and bike infrastructure, people will simply continue to take the car. Similarly, public transport needs to be introduced/ increased.

[gunnhldrs]

⚜ — a study in knightgirlisms; the jean gender (jeander) analysis.

                                nobody asked but i am answering anyway.

this is entirely a self indulgent word vomit, but for some context: i have been diseased about jean for a really really long time. of course throughout the years my interest in genshin has had its ups and downs, so in starting gnostic hymns and revisiting my oldest and dearest fav, a lot of old headcanons and thoughts are resurfacing.

since i now have an outlet to voice them: welcome to my completely disorganized ramble about jean gunnhildr being just a girl.

For what is literally the oldest clan in Mondstadt, the actual information we have on the Gunnhildr clan itself doesn't detail any more than two (2) of its leaders since earning its name.

The first, its namesake, Gunnhildr. The second? Jean.

We actually never have it specified why or how Jean has been chosen as its successor, just that her mother has raised her to be. Reasonably, one would assume that her mother had been its leader based on such, but then even that isn't outright stated. All you get to know about Frederica Gunnhildr is that she's a knight of the clan. Awesome. We literally don't even know what being leader of the Gunnhildr clan means in present times.

And you can't exactly correlate the status of successor to the (seemingly entirely separate) title of Dandelion/Lion Fang Knight that was given to Jean at age fifteen, as it has literally nothing to do with the Gunnhildrs at all and was also given to her after she would have been declared the clan's successor.

I would like to believe that the Gunnhildr clan's leaders have been predominantly female, but then again I couldn't really tell you. They have existed for three thousand years so only having two names doesn't prove much of anything.

The biggest takeaway, at least, is that Jean's entire life has been focused upon becoming a knight. From day one she has known that protecting Mondstadt would be her purpose, and has carried the weight of countless responsibilities and expectations. Regardless of the gender of those who she was surrounded by, Jean never really had a chance to care for much other than her future. Trivial things that would be considered traditionally feminine just didn't matter as much.

To top it off, we know Jean to have been childhood friends with Diluc (as well as Kaeya by association though I actually cannot recall if that relationship is every explicitly mentioned in canon) which I personally think would only aid in her disinterest in femininity. Who needs to care about dresses and makeup when you can chase your friend around with a stick or whatever.

So now you're thinking "Lina what the fuck does this have to do with right now" and that's a really fair question so here's the part of the essay that is actually the whole point of why we are here.

I think, to put it plainly, Jean's relationship with gender (specifically femininity) is complicated. It plays a very small role in the world as she views it. However I believe that the part of Jean that does perceive it wishes to be more in touch with it.

It's an absent kind of thing-- she didn't have the time for it as a child and she certainly doesn't have the time for it now-- but I believe it to be there in a couple of things. The most specific being her affinity for romance.

This is the part of the post where I look you in the face and tell you that Hoyoverse sucks and is wrong and I am about to entirely undermine a single sentence of their stupid fucking lore.

From Character story 5:

Master Jean has yet another secret. No matter how many times she has read the historical classics, despite her title of Dandelion Knight, and though she has become the Acting Grand Master whom everyone relies on... Jean still loves romance novels. This is not for the years as a young girl that she missed amid her training and duties, or due to the rift that formed in her parents' marriage. Jean simply yearns for the mutual attraction spoken of in such stories, for those emotions as subtle and fragile as spider-silk. As a knight, she must put Mondstadt and the Knights of Favonius first. But...

I'M SORRY?

Be so for real right now. What. Like. What. Huh. Wh.

So basically this entire post was to come down to this one line and tell you all in a very loud TED Talk sort of way that I don't know what the fuck Hoyo is trying to say by declaring neither of those things to have ANY relation to this interest, but that I disagree. I think it makes perfect sense for a woman who was denied girlhood to have wistful thoughts of romance like in the books. I feel it seems ridiculously out of place as a part of her character without that context, in fact.

Fuck this noise. Anyhow.

Her summer skin in game also has quite the flowery description, as follows:

The Acting Grand Master's life runs like the gears of a machine, driven by the great force of heavy responsibility, constantly being ground down by work. Over time, the armor of chivalry has become like Jean's second skin, the presentation of proper dress code and a formal image becoming ever more firmly forged into her nature. But in truth, Jean is no older than the ordinary young women around her. In the novels that these young ladies enjoy, gorgeous gowns are as quintessential as sun, moon, and starlight themselves, and some opulent noble scions do indeed sit pretty in dresses that sprawl out like palaces, their hem-lines and long skirts intertwined like the lapping waves of the sea. Perhaps Jean once had such romantic aspirations too. After all, who has never hankered after the blissful beauty of luxury?

Which I think, when tied in with the knowledge of her love for those novels, highlights an interest in more than just the relationships within them.

(Also this outfit having been a shared effort by just about every friend of hers within Mondstadt, I can't help but assume that the way she seems to covet the idea of being Just A Girl is something that those close to her have picked up on. Especially Barabara, Amber, and Lisa.)

So, at the end of it all, I offer you my silly little knight who (whether hoyo agrees or not) has some internalized self image things to work out that she never will because she's literally this tweet.

If you read all this thank you i owe you money for your time.

[anonymousad]

hey do you mind not putting your creator witch hunts in the audio drama tag? I'm just trying to enjoy media about the shows I like and it's super off putting to see this weird Harlan gossipy stuff in the tags.

(lowkey it's also kinda weird for you as a creator to anonymously gather info about another creator in the space like this. if you've got a problem, go talk to them like a normal person? Why do you get a veil of anonymity while you air out para-social grievances?)

honestly I find it a bit concerning that you are unwilling to engage with the community at more than a surface level.

this feels like one of those things where someone will point to death of the author and "separating the art from the artist", but that isn't what that concept means: it's about artistic intent and meaning behind a piece, and how your interpretation is valid regardless of what the artist would say it is SUPPOSED to mean.

it has very conveniently been used in recent years to try and excuse people's engagement with problematic media figures (JK Rowling being a very obvious one), but the entire essay is ONLY about interpretation and a piece of art's "ultimate meaning".

not holding people accountable because you like their work is how you get unchecked abuse, just look at Hollywood.

actively choosing not to engage with these factors is a point of privilege, the same way that "not being political" is. I understand that fiction is escapism, but fiction is also how unsafe and unhealthy ideas can be spread. fiction does not mean "completely divorced from reality".

as for the anonymity, I'm not sure if you've ever paid attention to what happens to people who do NOT speak anonymously? I've seen people who are just listeners and not creators get fucking dogpiled on for something that isn't even a harsh take. some people in the community have a lot of power and connections and willingly deploy them against the people they feel have "wronged" them.

I've seen people get blocked on Twitter by some of those people for daring to ask a non-attacking question about the journalistic approach taken for a certain RQ-related article.

everyone is shit talking in private and happy faces on the exterior. nothing stays between two people for long if one person feels like they are being "attacked" by some feedback, even if said feedback is something small.

[ineffably-human]

I keep trying to put together my Grand Theory of Nandor's Feelings regarding Guillermo and everything that happens throughout season 3. But it keeps butting against another essay, because I think these two things are linked: Nandor spends the entire season learning to give up power. Learning to embrace giving up power, maybe even realizes that's what would make him the happiest. And I think that’s why he finally offers to turn Guillermo in The Portrait, based on a series of events that start with The Escape and that slap.

At season's beginning, Nandor spends a month dragging out the decision of what to do with Guillermo. Everyone else is vocally for killing him and Nandor’s the only one who keeps kicking the can down the road. That's a month for him to really sit and marinate over the idea of losing Guillermo - and to feel completely helpless. "A lone voice crying out in the wilderness," because he sees himself as the leader of the house but he's practically powerless. Guillermo has saved his life, something that by his personal code should be repaid, but he can’t do anything but delay what seems inevitable.

When they sort the bodyguard arrangement out, Guillermo starts to take on new roles in Nandor's life, to have new power and responsibility. And Nandor isn't just happy about this, he advocates for Guillermo. He tries to make sure the promotion sticks among the group, and he does it to make Guillermo feel happier, with no thought about his own agency or authority. He insists that even complete strangers and powerful figures view Guillermo as a bodyguard.

It's Nadja who's on Nandor’s radar as the biggest threat to his power, and even there his secret plan is to make her his second in command, but that’s something vampires don’t do well or often. "Once a ruler of men, now a ruler of vampires.” Nandor has always defined himself by his past. But we know who he was as a human, and he spent his life killing and pillaging; he turned Nadja’s home from a paradise into the dirt island she clawed her way out of. And as a vampire we’ve never seen Nandor successfully be that person, or even show signs of wanting it. The Council is no different. He tries (and fails) to negotiate. He’s polite and merciful, he’s soft, and Nadja thrives by ripping out vampire hearts and then tells Nandor he can never, ever fuck up like that again.

Nandor’s been in power for all of an episode and it already feels meaningless. His growing depression has him realizing he’s lonely, thinking that’s what has Nadja feeling fulfilled (when really she’s growing separately from Laszlo and into the power Nandor no longer truly wants). So he tries to fill the void with the world's most superficial relationships, none of which succeed. But what really sends him spiraling is finding out the cosmology of the world is different. Because finding out the giant turtle doesn't exist is a lot like finding out kings (and Supreme Viceroys) aren't divinely appointed. Sentient beings were formed out of dust, and there's an entire cosmos of even more dust. The Earth, and Nandor, are no longer the center of the universe. Which means even in life Nandor’s world was smaller than he thought, and his state of mind is all downhill from there.

As Nandor feels more insecure, Guillermo’s confidence keeps growing. Nandor notices in The Chamber of Judgement that Guillermo is doing something unusual, with his attempts at manipulation, and he's also defying his fair share of Nandor's direct orders. He's probably wrestling with how someone so close to him has changed so much; we know, at least, that Kayvan interprets it that way. But we never see him try to clip Guillermo’s wings. Is that because Guillermo is a human so it's not the same? Because Nandor still sees him as subordinate? Because he just trusts him that much?

Maybe he doesn't even know. But then The Escape happens, and that’s where I think the gears start turning.

Guillermo is on fire when he organizes the Sire pursuit, he's got leverage and know-how and the only thing any of them question is his tone. Nandor's in an absolute breakdown over the situation, and now he's watching Guillermo become a more effective leader than he is. Once again, he could push back against that, or try to compete with it, but he doesn't.

Then the slap happens. The episode makes space for the slap, it stops the action for it, even though it doesn't really serve a narrative function for what comes next. (Because if I'm right, it serves a function for what's going to come in later episodes.) Like other people have pointed out, it's Guillermo breaking the kayfabe of the hypnosis. But Nandor the famously relentless warlord was also just put in a submissive position in front of everyone. By his servant, who tells him to stop freaking out and help, because he’s doing this for him.

And it grounds him. He's centered, and newly confident, and (there is no other interpretation of this tbh) fucking aroused. He's back in form because Guillermo essentially took control and guided him there, and it turned out to be exactly what he needed.

He could coast on that, but he repays it by taking responsibility as well. It's literally in Guillermo's job description to be the one in the line of fire, but Nandor says it should be him taking the risk since this is his fault. He’s been saying “I accept responsibility” all episode, but this is the first time those words mean something, and have tangible consequences. And then Guillermo acts quickly and decisively to rescue him.

Here's what just happened: Guillermo was a leader and Nandor helped execute the plan and protected the leader from harm, trusting he'd be supported in turn. Nandor was Guillermo's second in command.

In The Siren, we see how completely different Nandor’s priorities as a leader are compared to Nadja’s; he wants to plan carnivals and sponsor charity runs, he has no interest in the more prestigious duties of the Council. When the chaos starts, Guillermo is given a direct order by Nadja (one he asks Nandor if he should obey, even) but Nandor flat-out says he doesn’t want to be alone with her while she’s in a mental spiral. He wants Guillermo there specifically for his safety.

He’s ultimately alone with her and the doll anyway, though, witnessing them making up, and when he tries to lend his own compliments about how Nadja is co-leading she tells him none of this is about him. She’s been fighting to be taken seriously (just like Nandor as head of the household, just like Guillermo as a familiar and an outsider) but Nandor doesn’t matter as someone she respects, more as an obstacle to get around.

That plus the equivalent of his birthday turns his depression into something more visible to everyone around him. And he takes Jan’s offer as an opportunity to get away. I don’t think he’s just leaving to get them to come after him, but I do take him leaving the address behind as significant, even subconsciously. Part of him hopes some of these “uncaring assholes” will come look for him like in the episode before. (In the process, he formally releases Guillermo from his service and says he will never make Guillermo a vampire, so everything Guillermo does from then on - at least during the length of the episode - is a decision he makes as Nandor’s friend.)

But because Guillermo doesn’t find that address until a month later, Nandor gets entrenched in the Wellness cult. And he finds freedom in it, because he’s encouraged to not perform the strength and power he feels he has to project to everyone back home. The cult already has a leader, and Nandor becomes her second in command by sheer enthusiasm. Among vampires, being subordinate is a weakness, but among humans “number twos are treated with the utmost respect.”

He doesn’t want to leave with Guillermo. But when Guillermo starts giving him orders, he immediately does as he says, with not even token physical resistance. He’s furious in the end, but in that crucial moment, Guillermo led and he followed with absolute trust. And he performs another act of trust in sincerely telling Guillermo how unhappy he is.

We don’t know how long he was in the cage getting deprogrammed, but we’re told it’s longer than expected. I think it’s enough time for him to realize two things: Guillermo can hurt him, both with the slap and things like the silver seatbelts, meaning the hypnosis didn’t work. And Guillermo is the only one who came after him, who believed he was rescuing him. Nandor is furious with him. But it’s clear at that point that Guillermo is also special. Guillermo gets real venom directed his way (the first instance of ‘familiar’ in ages specifically to hurt him), and yet A Farewell is the first episode that Nandor calls him ‘my Guillermo.’

The Super Slumber is both a kind of passive suicide, and another form of running away while hoping he’ll get attention from the others (it’s easy to wake him up that first time, and afterwards he never goes back to sleep). It’s also throwing out the last scraps of that identity he clings to, of the powerful and relentless warlord he was in life. He’ll have no connections when he wakes up, he’ll be weak and near-helpless. He’s willing to say Nadja killed him to take his power, something that would humiliate him. A group of world-renowned vampires gather around his coffin and talk about how as a human he was great, but as a vampire he was just okay, some of the legends were exaggerated even, while his body is manhandled.

And it’s Guillermo, it’s only Guillermo, defending him every moment he can while Nandor’s at his weakest. It’s Guillermo who literally breaks down his barriers and says someone is really dying, and you need to be there for that because this was our friend.

Nandor tries to run away a third time. That’s what his world trip is. (If you count Manhattan Night Club, this is three times they’ve both left/tried to leave and returned.) Nandor used to conquer the world, to burn it to the ground, now he wants to see it. He wants to do service work cleaning the oceans, even. Nadja talks about her old life in terms of how hard it was, how much she’s built since then; Laszlo talks about his old life to emphasize how little he cared about it, since it turns out he gave it up for love. Nandor has clung to who he was as a mortal since the moment we were introduced to him, and now he wants to shed everything about it like an old skin. Unless one last attempt at running-to-be-chased pays off.

It’s been covered that he’s especially pointed and cruel in the things he says to Guillermo here. He’s absolutely goading him into a fight. Guillermo says “I’ve been protecting you. You live because I let you live.” (I want you to be alive. I’m not afraid of the dangers of being alive at your side.) Nandor knows full well that Guillermo can’t be hypnotized, so his taunt is saying ‘prove it,’ and Guillermo does. And he wins. And the test isn’t that Guillermo can defend himself, it’s that Guillermo will speak up enough to truly fight him.

And I think everything started from that first slap and led to this point, because Nandor wants to give up who he was - but his value to other vampires has always been as a person who died a long time ago, that hasn’t fully fit him for a long time. Except when Guillermo struck him, he didn’t feel vulnerable. He felt safe. He felt revitalized. He doesn’t feel weak this way, he feels supported. He feels trust.

“I worried that you were going a little soft.” That you wouldn’t challenge me if you needed to. “...you can take care of yourself, and you can take care of me.” And if Nandor gives Guillermo power (in the same land his old self died, the land he learned to be a warrior) then he can trust Guillermo won’t use that power against him. Guillermo can be the one to take the lead, and Nandor can be his second.

I don't know if Nandor realizes he's in love yet. I don't know if he realizes how deeply Guillermo feels for him (I think he knows Guillermo feels something, but he doesn’t know how to untangle that from a lot of self-image things and being-a-vampire things, not to mention the years he saw Guillermo as a child). But I do think Nandor has decided to make Guillermo a vampire because he understands he has something unique with him, that giving him the reins will only make Nandor feel more whole.

It’s likely he doesn’t know why yet, and doesn’t see how much a true partnership resembles a flat-out marriage. And who knows what he’ll regress to now that he thinks Guillermo left him, rejected his vulnerability and threw it back in his face. But I do think with the question of Season Four being ‘can you change who you’ve always been?’, Nandor will keep looking for who he is as a vampire outside of who he was as a human man. And the things he wants from eternal life are all the things Guillermo wants, in the end. Things they’ll achieve much more easily together.

[lillupon]

So, I've got a very long rant/opinion here and Idk really know how to say this without coming off kinda bad but I'm gonna say it anyways. I agree with the fact that the seventeen tag has been kinda dry lately on most fanfic places, but it's really only in the smut area. It's the sane way with other groups too I feel like. All of the nice little innocent tags are boomin to this day and thats completely fine. I think the smut tag is dry tho bc lately I feel like a few social issues (like sexualizing people and disrespecting them and their identity) have crossed over into kpop and have been ?blown out of proportion? Lately there's been a rampage of people who like to say that writing smut about someone is disgusting and is dehumanizing because people want to assume that it would make the idols uncomfortable which could equate to some morality issues on how you are reducing someone only to their body without their consent and a bunch of stuff like that. It kind of pisses me off bc this is fiction. About grown adults. Clamping down on horny people who simp over hot asian men isn't going to solve the issues we face in real life. I think a shit ton is wrong with the world we currently live in, and deciding to come after something that isn't even real bothers me. Like what does that actually accomplish. But yeah, I think thats a reason why smut has been dying down. I mean, on youtube almost every video about unpopular opinions, or things they dont like about kpop will include something about shipping idols in fanfics. And then everyone in the comment section will talk about how its all fine and dandy in moderation, but once people start writing smut it's crossing the idols personal boundaries. It's something I've been seeing a lot more often and I think people who are interested in writing smut are being turned away from it bc we've gotten to a point where people are being called disgusting for having fantasies.

Hi Anon, thank you for sending in this Ask. 

I want to preface this by saying: when I write or talk about Mingyu and Wonwoo fucking on my blog, it is a fantasy. I am not speculating about what the real Mingyu and Wonwoo might be like in bed. I am imagining the versions of Mingyu and Wonwoo that I have created in my head, that exist only in my stories. None of it is real. I understand that this can be a blurry boundary for some people. But for me, the separation between fantasy and reality is well-defined. Now, on to your Ask!

You’ve hit the nail on the head with this one. You’ve also touched on many of the issues I have been struggling with myself as of late. It’s difficult to argue about morals since everyone has a different set of values, as well as different comfort levels. Some people think real person fiction (RPF) is a gross invasion of privacy. Others are fine with it. And others don’t care one way or another. There is no single answer; I can only offer my answer. Which means, of course, people are welcome to disagree with it, or parts of it. 

In this essay (LOL But forreal: this is an essay), I will be sharing my experience in the k-pop fanfic community from 2014 to present, the etiquette I personally abide by as a reader and writer of RPF, as well as my stance on RPF in general.

I started reading and posting fanfics back in 2014/2015 on a website called AsianFanfics (AFF). Obviously, no one on that site had a problem with RPF, since AFF is a platform made specifically for sharing stories about Asian celebrities. For many years, I read and enjoyed RPF with zero guilt. I scribbled away by myself in my own corner of fandom and curated my own content. I didn’t interact much with other fans, readers, or writers. I didn’t have a Twitter, and I only used tumblr to reblog memes. As a result, I’ve been able to avoid a lot of anti-shipping discourse, as well as purity and cancel culture. I had no idea there were so many negative opinions about RPF. It wasn’t until I became active on the subreddit r/Fanfiction last year that I learned about all the discourse surrounding RPF. 

This newfound ‘awareness’ does make me feel guilty at times—but only because after mulling this over, I still don’t think this is something to feel guilty about.

Here’s what I remember, first and foremost, when I create and consume RPF: fanfics and my favourite ships are fictional, and fiction is fantasy. This is basic etiquette when it comes to RPF, and most people in the k-pop fandom understand this. Delusional fans exist, of course, but they are not representative of the entire k-pop community. 

Another point of etiquette is to keep fanfics within fandom spaces. I would never push my fics into celebrities’ faces, or go around claiming that my fanfics are accurate representations of a k-idol’s life or personality, in any way, shape, or form. I would also discourage directing ship-related questions to official accounts, or bringing them up during fansigns or other face-to-face interactions; I believe that in these instances, shipping does have the potential to strain real-life relationships.

So with basic etiquette out of the way, let me share my approach to RPF in general.

As much as we like to think we know our favourite celebrities, we really don’t. All we see is their public persona. And this public persona is intentionally controlled, managed, and curated by a team of people: directors, tabloids, editors, makeup artists, publicists, etc. How “real” are these celebrities? We are so distanced from them that they may as well be fictional.

I draw from the public persona that idols project, and I work them into my own writing. But at the end of the day, these personalities are my own interpretation. My interpretation is probably nothing like an idol’s actual personality. I just use the “public persona/character” that idols portray as inspiration for my own stories, which are set in wildly different universes.

More than anything, I think of k-pop idols as “actors” in my fic. You know how when you write an original novel, you scroll through Google images, looking for the perfect person to portray your original character? RPF is literally that, except you might build upon pre-existing dynamics and personalities.

When it comes to explicit fanfiction, two main concerns are prevalent: one of consent, and one of sexualisation.

If we argue against explicit RPF due to lack of consent, we should be willing to apply the same lens to all explicit works. How do we know that the creator of a movie, book, series, etc., is okay with us using their characters in our stories, explicit or not? We don’t. Perhaps some creators encourage fanfiction, but don’t want their lovingly crafted characters engaging in sexual acts or experiencing trauma. We just don’t know. I feel this line is even more blurred when we talk about characters from movies or TV series.

Let’s take Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes, as portrayed by Chris Evans and Sebastian Stan, from the Captain America movies as an example. I am willing to bet that when people consume and create explicit fanfiction about Steve and Bucky, they are imagining Chris Evans and Sebastian Stan in their heads. I doubt many people are imagining the 2D cartoon versions of Steve and Bucky, even though they’re technically the exact same characters. Why? Well, it could be because movies are more readily and easily consumed than comics, and so people are unfamiliar with comic book Steve and Bucky. But it might also be because fans find Chris Evans and Sebastian Stan attractive. Is this really any different from RPF, where fic authors make up everything about a celebrity’s life?  

When readers and writers of fanfic talk about how hot Steve Rogers or Bucky Barnes is, those comments are about Chris Evans and Sebastian Stan’s bodies. When reading explicit stories, fans are going to picture Chris and Sebastian’s bodies in their head, doing sexual things. Can we say, “Well, it’s not really you, Chris/Sebastian”, when in a way, it is?

The reality is, people are going to thirst over celebrities, regardless of whether or not explicit fanfiction exists. They’re going to post thirst tweets on Twitter. They’re going to talk to friends and strangers online about how hot [insert celebrity name here] is. They’re going to fantasize about dating and having sex with their favourite celebrity. Or, as it is in my case, they’re going to make up stories in their heads about their favourite idols dating and banging each other. People are going to do all of this without ‘getting consent’ from the celebrity. Cracking down upon and shaming writers of RPF isn’t going to change any of that.

To be honest, I’m not sure why people think it is disgusting to imagine sexual scenarios about real people. It is okay and normal to have these kinds of fantasies. I suppose the alternative is to fantasise about having sex with cartoon characters instead? It’s a very binary way of thinking to say that if you imagine/write real people in explicit scenarios, you are immediately sexualising, dehumanising, or objectifying them. There is more to dehumanisation than writing smut about our favourite celebrities. For one thing, you can love someone and appreciate all parts of them, and still want to fuck their brains out. And generally, fanfics come from a place of love—love that is not only sexual in nature.

Is it the sharing aspect inherent to fanfiction? The possibility that a celebrity might stumble upon explicit works about them? The chances are very low, I think, of the k-pop idols I enjoy writing about coming across my English fics. But I also believe in curating your own content, and that applies to celebrities too. Perhaps a celebrity should not go searching for fanfics about themselves. And of course, people should not show celebrities their fanfics, unless invited.

Another argument I hear against (explicit) RPF is, “How would you feel if someone wrote fanfiction about you?” First off, I don’t like this argument because there’s a difference between someone who decides to be a public figure versus someone who decides to remain a regular private citizen. Celebrities should and do know what they’re getting into when they choose their occupation. (This is not to say, “They are celebrities; sexualise them all you want because that’s what they signed up for.” Here, I am only acknowledging that people might have sexual fantasies about celebrities they are attracted to. Presumably, celebrities are cognizant of this.)  

If someone (whose existence I am not even aware of, mind you) decides they want to write explicit fanfiction of me in some tiny corner of the Internet, I wouldn’t care so long as: (1) they don’t shove it into my face, and (2) they don’t harass me and ask invasive questions about my personal life and relationships. It’s not hurting me or negatively affecting my life, so it wouldn’t even register as a blip on my radar. When fanfiction remains within its appropriate spaces, it is largely harmless. 

Now, if a k-pop idol were to ask their fans to stop writing fanfiction about them, would I? Yes, I would. However, I can’t imagine that happening. Judging by the number of ‘sexy’ concepts, fanservice moments, and variety shows such as ‘We Got Married’, I am certain that k-pop idols realise they are the stars of many fantasies—some of which are explicit in nature. Considering the prevalence of shipping in the k-pop industry, I would argue that shipping is subtly encouraged.

It’s sad that so many talented writers are shamed out of fandom, or feel that k-pop cannot be the medium through which they tell their stories, or explore their sexuality, or cope with trauma, or simply have fun. Professional works and Hollywood love their RPF—readers and writers of fanfics should be able to, as well. 

As you said Anon, “clamping down on horny people who simp over hot asian men isn't going to solve the issues we face in real life” (this is a lovely sentence, by the way). The kind of person who dehumanises another and reduces them to a sexual object will do so some other way, if not via fanfiction. I don’t think the issue of fetishisation can be fixed simply by telling people not to write explicit RPF. In my experience, people who read and write RPF are more respectful and thoughtful about these things than the general public. We’ve all seen the general public say highly sexual things about celebrities in the media and to their faces, or tag celebrities in their thirst tweets. Are these things less invasive than fanfiction? Personally, I don’t think so. And in my opinion, there are more pressing and damaging issues in stan culture than fanfic.

In conclusion, I don’t think there is anything wrong with creating and consuming RPF, both explicit and non-explicit so long as we:

Remember we are writing fiction

Keep RPF within its appropriate space, and

Do not harass celebrities about their personal lives and relationships

RPF is not for everyone. There may be people who enjoy RPF, but draw the line at explicit stories. This is fine. Everyone has their own personal preferences. What is not fine, however, is attacking people for creating things you don’t like. I’m not sure what kind of moral crusade people are on and what they hope to achieve by shaming writers of RPF, explicit or otherwise. Ultimately, fic authors are writing a fantasy. It’s not real; no one is being hurt. I think it’s important for people to curate their own content, and AO3 makes it very easy to filter out explicit works and unwanted tags. 

Maybe this is me trying to justify my own participation in explicit RPF—I don’t know. What I do know is that I love k-pop, and fandom is an important part of my media and entertainment experience. I adore the k-pop idols I write about, and I just want to imagine them being happy and getting lots of love and orgasms. Let a bitch be horny, goddamn… 

Some bonus fun facts!

At the time I am writing this, on AO3:

26.2% of Stray Kids fanfics are rated M or E

26.3% of Seventeen fanfics are rated M or E

29.0% of Merlin fanfics are rated M or E

34.9% of Captain America (Movies) fanfics are rated M or E

40.1% of BTS fanfics are rated M or E ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Coincidentally, I saw this post on Reddit this morning: Can we have a RPF positivity post?

[whats-the-story-tc]

21st of April, 2020

"The One with the Fairy Tale"

(Pssst! If I were you, I'd read this post first before starting this new one!)

I cannot believe this is my life.

A couple minutes before the 8 AM rush hour, a Google Classroom notification from V arrived. Then another. Someone likes a spam, I thought, before opening the first one.

Sigh of relief. It was only the essay I'd already sent her. On to the next one, the detailed info on what we were covering today. The play on the table is both figuratively and literally a fairy tale. V, pretty critical of the play and its character work itself, made sure to bring one particular monologue to our attention, which tackles a rather difficult topic in a pretty simple play about love and longing — human mortality. "(It's my particular favourite, too, but don't let that influence you.)" She wrote after explaining what it was. The last paragraph though, now that was something else. "For those of you interested in an A level (here you imagine me looking at certain people)" she began, and my eyes widened as I read it. Sure, there are literature buffs in both classes, but... I can't help but think it was first and foremost an indirect to me. I mean, I'm probably the biggest nerd out of all of us, and she's always looking at me anyways... I want to dream big and say she wanted me to see it most. I mean, it's a link to an incredibly long essay. The situation speaks for itself.

"Look at this silence," V said as she entered our server at around 11 AM. Once she was here, we (as in all of us) started chatting about the break and quarantine. "It has been Sunday for two months." I declared, V immediately continuing the thought: "That part of Sunday, no less, where the line between the previous week and the next one blurs." Couldn't have said it better myself.

As V spoke about the story, I just leaned back on my bed, letting myself get immersed in the explanation and the sound of her voice while trying to imagine everything. After a while, it all started sounding like the plot of Mozart's opera, The Magic Flute — especially when V said that our protagonists, a human boy and a fairy girl, both had companions of the same sex along the way. And as soon as she said those companions are actually married, I waited for her to take a tiny break in speaking and said "How surprising." According to Bookworm Friend, she laughed, but I couldn't hear it clearly because someone made a noise. Then she said "Obviously..." and basically shaded the whole plot line, though I don't remember the rest of the sentence. And guess what she brought up immediately? That's right. The Magic Flute. I was floored! "That's what I was thinking, too!" I chimed in immediately. She took the words out of my mouth! And, soon as I said that, I got a text from Bandana Friend.

BanF: "Wow the twinning"

It's official, folks. Even from a distance, V and I are sharing a braincell.

Serious shit went down in class, including pointing out some... very suggestive imagery that caught us all off-guard because the thing she mentioned isn't inherently suggestive, but okay, V, you do you. (Obviously, I'm not going into detail here, nor sharing the conversation Bandana Friend and I had here because... this is simply not the platform.)

But what I can share is a really funny bit that caused a bit of a pandemonium in the separate class chat none of our teachers are in. You see, about half an hour into class, The Boyfriend sneezes with what is probably the volume of a medium-sized family house collapsing. About five seconds of absolute comical silence follows, then we just hear V saying "Sorry. I'm sorry." before carrying on. All this caused quite the stir, featuring texts like:

BanF: "The whole house just quaked"

and

Classmate: "Jesus who was this 😂😂"

Classmate: "Tell me it wasn't [V]"

S: "No, her man"

Classmate: "Good heavens I thought it was her 😂😂"

and

S: "I laughed so hard that I thank God I was on mute"

So yeah. That's on that. Bit later, with the words mentioned here, V ended class, and there I was, on Cloud 9, dancing around my room and humming Disney songs from the sudden serotonin charge. That was probably the moment I decided to read the play V spoke about. You see, she didn't assign it because the wording is quite difficult (the text is quite old) and students usually struggle with it, but she said that we wouldn't lose anything by reading it, if we wanted to. And thus it happened that I sat down on my balcony at around 5 PM with the first chapter open on my phone, ready to read.

I knew she'd be right. I trust her opinion and my reading comprehension skill suffers at the stake of my absolute inability to concentrate for longer than 10 seconds. But guys. Some of the longer sections I had to go over at least three times before I understood what was going on! An hour or so must've passed when I read the last line of the first chapter, and the butterflies in my stomach took flight. It was time to text V about it. It was my original plan, anyway. Figure out how right she was, then tell her about it. I was already incredibly nervous, trying to stick to what I'd planned on writing. My fingers typed on autopilot and as soon as I was done, I could barely believe I was actually going through with this. But alas, you only live once, carpe that fucking diem. One big breath. Two biiiiig breaths.

Send.

S: "Well, Miss, I'm not saying you were right about the text of [the play], but I've only read Chapter 1 and I'm already doubting if I even speak [my native tongue]... 😅"

I immediately tossed the phone on my bed and ran away panicking. What will she say? How will she react to seeing it's me again? What does she think? Am I funny enough? Am I bothering her? When will she reply?

Half a minute later (!!!), I see the icon of The Platform That Shall Not Be Named on my screen. No. No. No. Nonononononono. I picked the phone up and unlocked it with a shaking hand. I was not prepared for what I was about to read.

V: "Hahaha, well, babydoll...You do. You're just not used to [the old-timey wording]."

I only had the time to sink to my knees, eyes wide, lips agape, when the next message followed.

V: "Though, once you're already through it, I'm curious about your opinion on the play's stageability. 😄 (given such a word exists)"

You bet your asses all air left my lungs. Not only did she call me babydoll again, now in a way that I could forever remind myself of it, but she basically just prompted another conversation! She wants to talk to me again! And I'll have you reminded, V's basically trusting my judgement based on the scriptbook I showed her at the dawn of time, that she'd never actually seen in action! I wonder what I did to earn all this trust...

S: "I'll see at the end and tell you :)"

V: "Alright :))"

Then, all brave from the double smiley, I had a really stupid and impulsive thought. (Don't yell.) Me being the little shit that I am, I googled stageability and took a screenshot of no results having been found. I took a screenshot, cropped it and sent it to V, my head being completely empty as I did. I acted purely from gut feeling.

S: "Tough luck this time, it seems😄"

V: "i thought so!"

(I can only hope she took it as a joke. But, the way I know her, she probably understood. Still, the me of right now, exactly two days and two minutes later, wouldn't do it.)

And this is where it ended. This is where I ended. My hands, my legs, even my lips were trembling as I tried to process the sudden load of emotion overcoming me. What did I just do. What did we do. What happened here. All this just echoed in my head, and I went ahead and texted every friend I wanted to tell in all caps.

BanF: "WOAAHHHH"

BanF: "you guys have really warmed up to each other"

Even now, as I was typing, I got the chills just thinking about this conversation. If it wasn't for the 'Miss' and my use of formal pronouns in the very first text, it would've just felt like two friends, who happen to both love literature, talking. And this really warms my heart, because there's this fantastic woman, who I genuinely think is one of the best influences on my life and... she just likes me for me. She immediately answers when she can, comes off genuinely happy to talk to me, prompts another thing I can tell her about and all but tells me that my opinion matters to her. Because this is her. I'm almost convinced that I will never hear her outright say that she likes me or she's proud of me, but, should I have any doubts, she does everything to let me know. I just misunderstand her sometimes, not knowing where to look.

When I tell you all this still doesn't feel real...

~ S ♡

[Every story I share here, no matter how specific I get with my wording, depicts actual events from my own life.]